#wtf you doing bruh
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Lou’s under the breath, “Who’s still swinging? Who’s team disposal?”
#ICONIC statements from Lou here#it’s like the stupid fish monster still trying to kill the party after the terrible dogfish appears in neverafter last season#wtf you doing bruh#what does continuing to fight do?#dimension 20#d20#Deus-Pa’Zuul#gosh I was such a silly-billy for not getting that name before#the ravening war#trw#the ravening war spoilers#trw spoilers#the heart of the world#the heart of the world spoilers#lou wilson#live reaction
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WDYM DCMK TAMAGOTCHI IM GOING INSANE
#detective conan#dcmk#edogawa conan#kaitou kid#kaishin#I WILL GO INSANE I WANT BOTH SO BAD WTF#i literally opened an old wishlist letter to myself when i was a kid saying i wanted a tamagotchi (which i never had)#BRUH I WANT THEM SO BAD WTF 😭#first the watch then this???????#oh you fuckers over there in dcmk headquarters know exactly what yall doing i swear when i get my hand sob you 😩😩😩#dc prattles
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I need a BSD x Reader where it’s just the reader casually rizzing up everyone like no one is safe from the reader’s infinite rizz, not the ADA, not the PM, not the DOA, not the guild, and definitely not the Hunting Dogs, not even civilians; it’s literally everyone that is getting rizzed up, while the reader is aware and laughs and points at every clown they rizzed up.
THE ULTIMATE RIZZLORD.
various!BSD x reader
A/N: anon, I would like to point out how much I love you and this request right now. also, I put the reader in the port mafia for fun because why not.
Absolutely speechless.
This is how everyone felt – well, whether whoever it may be, there was just one thing all could collectively agree on. They may all be feared and powerful factions that anyone could basically kneel down to, however ...
Who THE FUCK is this audacious person?
MORI was the first to witness your ass flirt with every single person you saw. But no, did you even care? Not at all. He stares, bewildered and mildly in concern as you came up to every single person you saw – completely distracted from the mission at hand as you asked women to step on you, choke you ...
He wants you throw you back from where you came from.
Oh wait, nevermind. You were now flirting with HIM. MORI is in even more shock at your confidence. Damn, pretty bold of you. But he actually thought you kinda hot fr. Elise still #1 bae tho
And somehow, you were taken up to being an executive. Everyone is morbid and utterly terrified.
How the fuck is someone like you an EXECUTIVE?? HELLO??
CHUUYA turns as red as his hair could ever be. Look man, he just wanted to complain about Dazai and you here just ..
"That fucking idiot Dazai! I'll rip him apart!"
"Yes daddy- I mean, can you do that to me too?"
"... What?"
"Ooh~ those fingers are so slender and pretty .."
"Wh-"
"Mind if I ... caress them a little, babygorl?"
"(Y/N) WHAT-"
Aww, look at that, Chuuya is deader than Odasaku <3
But God forbid you be taken on important missions against another factiom because fuck man. All you're there for is 1% fighting, 99% rizzing.
Y'know when everything was in chaos in Yokohama bcz of the Guild trying to take over? Everyone's fighting their ass off, God knows where DAZAI is but no one cares, and you?? Uh yeah already guessed it.
Tryna rizz up the agency.
Like yes, they're in trouble, everyone is, we know but fuck war we want fictional men. And women.
"Are you lingo? Because we can make a good duo 😏" - you
"... Did you just make a duolingo pickup line" - kunikida
Man times when the port mafia and the agency are in a truce, you're there back and forth flirting nonstop. Everyone is red, turned on from your oh so amazing rizzler skills
DAZAI enjoys your company obviously. Both of you create so much chaos, but even sometimes you're so much worse than him. You're the only one who can actually surprise him. Like wtf bitch stop flirting with the damn secret police?? Uh??
You make suicidal jokes, whispering them so sexily in his ear he wanna take you to the bed right there mamasita lip bite
Oh, the Decay of Angels wanna achieve world domination? They can dominate sumn else if you know what I mean
No words can express how terrified u keep making everyone THAT'S FYODOR HE'LL KILL YOU WITH A TOUCH BITCH- oh wait nvm he's melting from all of your rizz and affection.
You are literally so sweet but so confusing. SIGMA sees you around the Sky Casino just chilling and flirting with everyone you see. He don't mind cause you hot anyway
The Guild kinda ... actually, no. They're not safe. FITZGERALD? More like Rizzgerald cause this bitch 'bout to get rizzed so hard he turns poor
Yeah .. I don't take it to heart.
You'll just be up in their ass even after the Yokohama incident. Literally all of them both love and hate you. "Should we throw her off a cliff or kiss her" "Idk the second option is kinda tempting tho" "Boss, what do we d-" "Both."
DAMN LOVECRAFT AND BRAM TOO?? BITCH STOP 😭
No one can escape from your rizz. Okay one time you got kidnapped by the fuckin Hunting Dogs but you just?? Started to rizz up and call JOUNO ur bbygorl?? He is seconds from slicing your head off but he gave up at this point.
Where you got that rose from 🤨
Why the fuck is romantic music playing 😐
You asked FUKUCHI himself to choke you and slam you against the wall. Not even an ounce of regret of fear.
Everyone officially is scared of you.
ANGO isn't free from this either, bitch. You'll strut into the room all happy to talk for a mission and all but ... uhh. "So you're from the Special Division? I can't blame you then ... I feel as if I have something special going on for you."
ANGO, internally: iamnotasimp- iamnotasimp- iamnotasimp-
Sadly, he is now a simp.
The fact his face turns so red is not unnoticed by you. You laugh, clowning everyone you literally rizzed up no joke. They're so in love with ur pretty/handsome/hot ass 😔
No one is free. If you find a pretty bird, ask it's hand for marriage. There is no other way but that.
Mk but the way you literally hit on AKUTAGAWA do be funny. Bitch is so oblivious, he just thinks you're another certain blonde hair slaying bitch 😳
By the time he actually knows you're rizzing him up by being more direct about your advances, he is questioning life.
But bcz you're SOO close to DAZAI maybeee we can ...
Work sumn out, you know? heh
One day the mafia just be chilling and BOOM heree comes the wh00000re~ hello wh000re~ welcome~ 😍
(i am so sorry if this offends someone it's a meme-)
Cue everyone sighing as you come in and start your daily routine which is rizzing. You'll be caressing KOUYOU's cheek, talking to CHUUYA with that sexy ass deep voice, whispering in MORI's ear, and everytime you breathe the vine boom sound effect comes off.
Can't say they don't like it though. We all know we have some horny deviants lovestruck little cuties <3 but let's just say it's hard being here with those hoes 😔✌️
Yet most especially,
You.
*bites lip* (i am sorry.)
#bungou stray dogs#bsd x reader#crack#shitpost#bsd shitpost#hunting dogs bsd#port mafia#armed detective agency#rizz lord#idk what im doing#bruh wtf#anyways#hope you like <3#decay of angels#everyone x reader
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PROPHET. PROPHET.
I PROPHESIED.
I HAVE SIGHT. IVE SEEN.
#SLIME DUO#slime machine#slimewire#slimeirl#anthonybruno#anthony bruno#charlie slimecicle#slimecicle#bruh wtf do y’all know about slime duo 💀💀#I know them better than you smh#(slimecicle fan since 2019)#(yard watcher since 2022)
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“Claude in Hopes is exactly the same way he is in Houses! He’s always been like that and has the same feelings/morals!”
Claude in GW/Hopes:
Claude, literally, in Houses:
Let that speak for the fact that Claude was written with a 180 characterization in Hopes.
Claude wants peace and to bring everyone together; not to tear them further apart. That is his character.
#I’m still in the middle of answering this ask I got but yeah#even Edelgard noticed Claude really loves bringing ppl together in WC#when she says ''you really value that sort of thing don't you'' after the Eagle/Lion (+Deer >.> ) battle#like if Claude's goal was to destroy Fodlan and just leave a mess of it A+++ you did an astounding show stopping brilliantly done job#if your goal was peace well you fucked that up pretty good buddy#in Hopes too like he's literally arguing with Lorenz about it while Lorenz is like ??? bruh wtf ???#literally who cares what some politicians did 300 years ago certainly not Houses Claude#in fact Claude said fuck our history sideways with a cactus let's make peace and be friends#AND he got the approval from the whole roundtable and that's all we know on the topic bc it's all we needed to know#versus in GW where it's explicitly stated that it took some doing for them to allow Claude to be king#meaning the roundtable was not up for what he was suggesting and needed to be convinced#they needed it enough that Lorenz pointed it out to everyone and from a narrative standpoint#AM Claude doesn't need to say how the meeting went and all we need to know is that it worked out#but in GW it's told to us that the meeting was very long and it took some doing for them to trust Claude's judgment#the meeting is presented in a more uncertain light with how the lords felt abt it whereas in AM#it's not told to us how things went bc it's not important. a negative aspect (i.e. the roundtable not being able to come to an agreement)#is an important thing to note and if there was any negative aspect of it in AM they would've put it in there#meaning the roundtable trusts AM Claude's judgment enough when he tells them he wants to put their two nations together again#idk how else to explain that so I hope you get what I mean lol#I just find it completely baffling that people actually say both Claudes are the same person and that he was always like how he is in Hopes#like you can like his character in Hopes and enjoy that portrayal of him but at least admit he's written differently you know?#I hate when I see people say that Claude fans didn't understand his character in Houses at all bc they don't like him in Hopes#when you have literal staunch polar opposite sentences coming out of his mouth in these two scenes#the Claude we get in AM is the same Claude - the same person at his core - as he is in VW and all the routes#Houses Claude does not blame whatever the fuck Leicester and Faerghus did 300 years ago on the people living in their present#he also doesn't blame Dimitri or anyone else presently in power for Daphnel#GW Claude there is just grasping at unimportant and insignificant straws to justify his invasion#pretty sure AM Claude would be like ''hey dimi lemme borrow failnaught back real quick'' and smack GW Claude with it#then kindly hand it back to Dimi and smile and wave
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Loud voice = loud laugh 😔
#“stop laughing so loudly” BRUH WTF YOU WANT ME TO DO??#I CANNOT LAUGH QUIETLY. IM LITERALLY CRACKING UP SAMANTHA#i do not know how to be quiet 😔#i have like 20 fucking different laughs bro#but i cannot control them 😔
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Apollo yelling "I'm Apollo justice and I'm fine" is literally just him stimming ok? Ok.
#apollo justice#he is autistic ok he told me himself#hes probably not officially diagnosed tho bc he strikes me as the type to avoid going to the dr unless absolutely necessary#like how he literally almost got exploded and had rubble rain down upon him and was seriously injured... and still tried to stand in court#like. hes dumb. hes self sacrificing. he doesnt always realize when he needs yo call it quits. hes like literally everyone in my family#like trust me i know this type when i see one. im surrounded by them#my dad literally blacked out and fell and could have cracked his head open recently and hes like no its fine it only happened once#like????????? BRUH?????? HUH?????? IT ONLY TAKES ONCE FOR SOMETHING LIKE THAT TO END YOUR FUCKING LIFE MY GUY#HES LUCKY HE DIDNT HIT HIS HEAD!!!!! OR LAND ON SOMETHING SHARP????#like my dude. my guy. you are our lifeline if u croak wtf are we supposed to do#pls take care of yourself
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I think I experienced the whole range of human emotion over the past week and I'd like to uninstall it now.
#i am so so tired#had some conscious realisations about myself which were kind of annoying#cried twice in the span of 24 hours#I just need to be the little spoon for a couple of hours#that might fix me for now#but alas#i am bi myself#speaking of which#wtf are you supposed to do when your sibling asks if you're homophobic#like bruh obviously i am not but the rest of the fam is#christ i am so tired#asra's journal
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Idk man when i dont like or hate a ship i dont go around constantly making postS about how i hate the ship all whilst tagging said ship (not to mention promoting my ship in in the tag of the ship i hate) I understand when, where and how to insert my opinion properly. Like its fine u dont like a ship, but theres a point where it stops being "hating the ship" and is, instead, turned into "obsessed jobless antis with zero education on basic human decency and manner" but thats just me 🙂
#namor x shuri#shuri x namor#nashuri#namuri#bruh wtf r yall doing in namor shuri tag if u trashing on the ship???#get it together people#ever heard of scrolling pass stuff u dont like but other people might like that is not problematic or affect others negatively?#the way yall talking about namor shuri makes me feel like namor had beef with YOU personally instead of shuri#ITS SHIPPING its supposed to be fun its fun for me and some others let us have it
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Dear Tumblr,
Please fix your members not receiving any notification for literally anything even within your app. This has been going on for months now. As a blogging website/app, this is not acceptable.
You… got this (?),
#tumblr#no notifications#no notification#tumblr staff#tumblr issues#tumblr broke#notifications#request#fix it#tumblr problems#curators on tumblr#tumblr community#inconvenience#bugblr#please please please#artists on tumblr#bloggers#writers on tumblr#unacceptable#frustrated#come on already#announcement#reblog this#like bruh#hello tumblr#are you kidding me#are you there god? it’s me fiona#hear me out#just do it#bruh wtf
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I'm literally crying???? Fuck my life I guess that hurts!??!!? Wtf??!?!?!?
If I don't go back to hell and bring that bitch back and start our own family and be happy I'm gonna riot. You hear me???? I need at the end of the book the kid to ask me where the fuck am I going and my answer to be '"Finding my way back to hell" Back to him/her, but that was left unsaid.'
#samurai of hyuga#samurai of hyuga 5#I actually started crying wtf man you can't do that shit to my heart#I just started book 5 mostly cuz I replayed the other 4 before and damn#love it so far. could survive without it pointing out the lack of my lover thank you#lowkey I hope we would go back after J during this book but low chances#like who would even open a portal to hell for us???? bruh#ok but hear me out : we are the last villain and the others need to stop us from following in sensei's son's steps and doom Hyuga
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robert sean leonard stay alive challenge
#he has such a sweet face that makes writer want to kill him off#i was thinking ab watching house md for him (and cuz ive been meaning to watfh for a while) WDYM HE DIES OF CANFER#im certain that its cuteness aggression cuz no way#i went on fuckin tiktok and someone made a vid talking ab shows with bittersweet endings leaving u empty and the comments were like#adventure time amphibia attack on titwn and then i see house md and i thoufht i wws a joke#cuz i thought the show was ab a bitchy disabled doctor who has an unbelievable amount of plot armor and hates everyone#what do you mean him and wilson had an underlying gay relationship. what do you mean house fakes his death to be with him before he dies#WHAT DO U MEAN THE SHOW ENDS BEOFEE HE DIES#i didnt even watch thie fucking show yet bruh#excluding clips i saw here abd there in tiktok. wtf wyf wtc#l speaks#shut up l#oh em gee bruh
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i used to be really nervous about going back to my hometown because ‘what if i run into someone i don’t like‘ but like. the few times that has happened the people who have done be dirty have just 100% ignored me/run away from me. even despite me trying to be like heyyy. lol. which i guess means im a lot more confrontational than other ppl....
#lowkey bothers me though cause im like bruh you were so rude to me in highschool and youre gonna act like im the bad guy........#can you just own up to it and we can get it over with?? now it's awkward!!!#like im so down to have a positive interaction and not have to have this bitter taste in my mouth anymore..#also the way that multiple of these ppl work at a starbucks that i frequent#and had to take my order#LIKE I GAVE YOU MY NAME YOU OBVIOUSLY RECOGNIZE ME#idk i feel like if it were my me i would just apologize and get it over with#cy says stuff#personal#truth is i am a lot better with confrontation than other ppl but that's cause i was forced to learn those skills at a younger age..#it is kind of cringe that ppl don't wanna face their past or own up to their past mistakes ngl#anyways... my friend invited me to go to starbucks tomorrow and i am probably gonna run into the same girl who would spread rumors about me#and constantly update me on my ex despite me asking her not to#and also called me stupid for not doing well on a quiz i literally wasn't there for........#thing is no one liked her i was just nice to her cause i am a nice person.. and then she was so mean to me... like wtf...#and when i told her i didnt want to sit next to her anymore cause she was mean to me she started bawling#like damn girl okay i still dont want to be your friend though cause you kind of suck#and i guess she still holds that against me to this day lol. or at least the last time i saw her which was like. december#anyways im hella jetlagged and i woke up at midnight again. intrusive thoughts go brr#it'll be fine i am strong
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My goddamn group leader who literally wants do everything by herself and take all credit decided to deleted the majority of the slides me and some other girl did and replace it with her own without even discussing with us what the fuck-
#bro you could have just TOLD US YOU WANTED SOME CHANGES#BRUH THE SLIDES WE HAD THE SAME CONCEPT AS YOURS WTF#seriously wtf#honey.txt#honey.rants#honeymilkdepresso.exe#AND THE SAME POINTS BUT OFC#NOW THE BOTH OF US LOOK LIKE WE DIDNT DO THE WORK
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She got me excited about the day and shit
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Ughh why I never have any interaction notifications?!?!?
*Doesn't post* *Doesn't post* *Doesn't post* *Doesn't post* *Doesn't post*
#jokes aside it actually never made me mad LMAO#I just have this “do I have anything perhaps” everytime#and then I just remember myself#“bruh you return like once in 2 months wtf”
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