#y’know. as a fun bonding exercise

[numerousracoons]

My husband! He’s here. And he lives rent-free in my subconscious (pretty impressive considering the economy)- I have arguably too many thoughts on this man, spinning him in my head like a microwave does food.

I love this man so much but the thing I’ve really sunk my teeth into is his relationship to the theatre/‘this is a play’ aspect of Pathologic Classic.

It’s very much unique to his route and it carries so many implications for this man to actually just fully be aware than none of this shit is ‘real’.

Obviously, a personal favourite part of this is Daniil and Mark’s immortal (pun intended) beef with one another- these guys absolutely HATE one another, low key want the other dead or gone (Mark says he’s glad Daniil will be leaving and Daniil tells Mark that if he could’ve, he would’ve killed him in the Day 12 convo, which is in of itself just an entirely wild conversation)- but also they also make jokes to each other about what their lines are supposed to be and the set design and the theatre because they’re the only ones aware of the play meta - truely the most frenemies to ever frenemy.

But in a serious light Daniil figuring out the play is actually such an interesting aspect to his character and I’ve yet to see anyone else really dig into it.

Because while Mark Immortal talking about the theatre to Daniil is him essentially breaking character (in the other two routes he places no indication about the true nature of the theatre, implying his character’s role is that of an actual theatre director with weird, maybe kinda prophetic, plays), this isn’t The Bachelor’s actor breaking character and talking as the actor’s true self, but pretty blatantly Daniil Dankovsky The Character becoming aware of the play and that’s kinda wild.

And it holds so many implications to how his character acts in regard to fate and free will. Like The Powers That Be, while there’s absolutely an argument that Daniil’s denial in regards to being a toy of the Powers could just be him attempting to deal with the eldritch horror of it all, I think there’s pretty good reason to argue that it actually has to do with his somewhat meta-awareness (of the play).

While Daniil acknowledges that his character is a toy in the narrative, it could be argued that he knows he isn’t REALLY a toy, because this aspect is part of a play’s plot rather than the actual reality of him being an actor in a play. Which to me fits fairly well into his pre-established character trait of seeking the truth, The Bachelor doesn’t seem the type to actively attempt to deny reality when presented with evidence, no matter how discomforting it may be, so I feel as though his insistence to the developers of not being a toy is less so denial and more so him telling (what he perceives to be) the theatre troupe that he knows the toy storyline isn’t real- that he’s aware he’s in a play.

It also, interestingly enough, supports his ideas surrounding fighting the concept of inevitability and his disbelief in anything that claims otherwise (such as the Mistresses’ claimed clairvoyance abilities which heavy imply that the future is set in stone enough that it can been ‘seen’)- as Mark directly tells the Bachelor that the script hasn’t been written yet, and is dependent on his actions, alongside with the Bone Stake Lot quest in which Mark tells Daniil that he isn’t the one who made that set, it was the other characters who did that- ultimately supporting Daniil’s concepts of free will and the ability to ‘defeat’ things deemed by others to be inevitable (like death and fate).

(Also, speaking of the game developers, I 100% interpret the in-character Bachelor lines as him attempting to interact with the developers as though they are normal tragedians and executors. Because Daniil knows there is a layer of reality above the story (the theatre), and that’s what the tragedians and executors hint to and know, but he isn’t aware of the actual reality of it all being a video game. He thinks they’re like Mark Immortal, aware of the play, but in actuality they’re above that.)

But back to Mark Immortal and Daniil Dankovsky’s relationship, I find it really interesting how Mark approaches Daniil being meta aware, because on the one hand, he is joking around with Daniil, for example his Day 12 convo:

And then only a few lines later (after Daniil starts bringing up Mark’s involvement in his fate):

Which kind of blatantly shows that while Mark thinks that Daniil knowing is fun, he’s also fully aware that this was not his intention and would be annoying to deal with long term because of what Daniil could do with that knowledge.

[mya-valentine]

Could I get headcanons for Class 1-A with a reader (and maybe a hint of Bakugou x reader if possible) that has an ocean-based quirk. Some basic things are:

-They can breathe underwater (has full on slept at the bottom of a pool before- people thought they were dead), summon and control water (like a waterbender). Being able to make things like waves, whirlpools and even full tsunamis if so inclined (great person to have at a pool party).

-Loves to surf. They have a special surfboard they use during training and hero-ing so they can ride and do tricks on the waves they create.

-The chillest dude imaginable, has a very laidback and calm demeanor like a typical surfer dude (could get stabbed with the knife still being in their chest and only see it as a minor inconvenience) but they are also a bit of a daredevil due to their water abilities.

-Is a lot smarter and observant then their air-headed personality would lead you to believe and is very emotionally intelligent. Can and will drop the most insightful wisdom like it’s nothing if prompted.

-‘Dude’, ‘bro’, ‘man’ and ‘radical’ are permanently ingrained into their speech.

-Loves the beach and sea animals. Get them anything sea related like a whale shark plushie and they will love you forever.

(Love the way you right by the way ❤️. I don’t know how to describe it, but it’s lovely 💕)

Headcanon: Class 1-A with a Classmate who has an Ocean-based Quirk

A/N: I'm so glad you enjoy my work ☺️ and this was so much fun to write, I absolutely LOVE this

The first time Class 1-A saw you asleep at the bottom of the pool, they thought you had drowned. Iida was the most panicked, while Kaminari, always the instigator, thought it was some sort of prank. Eventually, someone had to dive in to check, only for you to calmly wake up and say, “Oh hey, bro, what’s up?” as if nothing happened.

You are the go-to person when Class 1-A throws a pool party. Whether it's creating waves for everyone to surf on or calming the water for relaxation, you're basically their in-house water park. You even once made a whirlpool at Mina's request, and it quickly became a favorite for impromptu water rides.

You have a specialized surfboard that's made for hero training, and everyone thinks it’s the coolest thing ever. It’s not just a surfboard—it’s a tool of destruction and mobility in battle. Your classmates have seen you use it to dodge attacks, ride over obstacles, and even pull off flips and tricks mid-fight. Bakugou secretly thinks it’s awesome but would never admit it.

You and Koda have a special bond over your shared love for animals. You love chatting with him about sea creatures and get ridiculously excited when you see marine life. Whenever you spot a dolphin, turtle, or even a tiny fish during field trips or training exercises, you’ll enthusiastically point it out with a “Duuude, check that out!”

Despite your laid-back surfer persona, your emotional intelligence always catches your classmates off guard. You’ll casually drop profound advice that leaves everyone stunned, like “Y’know, bro, life’s like riding a wave—you just gotta learn when to paddle and when to let go.” Your classmates often turn to you when they need some calm perspective during stressful times. Even Bakugou, despite being hot-headed, finds himself listening to your surprisingly deep takes on life.

You’re known for your chill demeanor—even in battle. You once got stabbed during a mission and literally said, “Ah, dude, guess that’s gonna take a minute to heal,” much to the horror of your classmates. It’s like nothing fazes you. A villain could throw you into a whirlpool, and you’d emerge surfing out of it like, “That was gnarly, man!”

Aizawa sometimes gets exasperated by how laidback you are during class, but he secretly appreciates your unflappable nature. You never let anything get to you, even during the most intense training sessions. Present Mic thinks your speech style is cool and might even start throwing “dude” and “radical” into his lessons as a result.

Though he’d never admit it openly, Bakugou admires how strong and capable you are. He’s watched you create massive tsunamis and control the battlefield with your quirk, and part of him enjoys the challenge of trying to outdo you, even if your approach is the complete opposite of his intense style.

Your calm, laid-back nature is a total contrast to Bakugou’s fiery temper, and it drives him nuts that you’re so unbothered by everything. He’ll yell at you during training to take things more seriously, only for you to respond with a relaxed, “Chill, man. We’ll get it done.” He might not say it, but he respects how unshakable you are.

Early on, Bakugou might have underestimated you because of your air-headed, “surfer dude” persona. But when he saw you analyzing a battlefield with sharp precision and outwitting villains with ease, he couldn’t help but take notice. Now, he secretly values your insight, even if he rolls his eyes when you drop one of your “deep, bro” moments.

He’d probably roll his eyes at your obsession with sea creatures and the beach, but after overhearing you talk about whale sharks with Koda, he gets you a small whale shark plushie—“because you wouldn’t shut up about it.” Of course, you think it’s the most radical gift ever, and Bakugou pretends not to care, but deep down, he’s a little proud you liked it.

You push Bakugou to loosen up, sometimes teasing him with your carefree attitude. He’ll yell at you for being too relaxed during training, and you’ll just flash him a grin and say, “Don’t sweat the small stuff, man.” You challenge him to surf on the waves you create during training exercises, and while he grumbles about it, he’ll eventually give it a try—if only to prove he can master it.

When you got stabbed in battle and shrugged it off like it was nothing, Bakugou was furious. Not because you were hurt, but because you didn’t take it seriously. “You idiot!” he’d shout, but it’s clear he’s worried. Later, he’ll privately make sure you’re okay, masking his concern with his usual gruffness.

.

.

.

Masterlist

[jj-shubert-writes]

WHG 22: What Doesn't Kill You

Part 1 of my writing for the WHG round 22 with my characters Rhiannon Wu and Valley. It's the day before the Reaping in Viper Den, a small company town space station recovering from recent trouble.

-

Halfway through the mandated workout Rhiannon did as per her strict schedule to prevent zero gravity from doing whatever the hell it did to bones, Valley swung xemself into the otherwise abandoned gym. Considering xe was an android who didn’t need exercise and who would rather boil xer hand than touch something sweaty, this was bound to be good.

Xe made a beeline straight for Rhiannon, expression blank as usual, but she was getting used to that head tilt that meant xe was smug about something. She pulled herself away from the weights machine as xe braced xemself to a stop with xer feet on a hull bar and said without preamble, “I’ve finally managed to unspool all the encryptions and passway-bonds in the currency card we found on the corpse. I had to invent new protocols to do it because that’s exactly what the card is designed to prevent, so it took longer than I would’ve liked, but it clearly links back to the mayor’s account.”

Rhiannon nodded slowly and said “Hm.”

That got xer eyebrow to twitch just a little. Xe only showed annoyance when xe wanted it to show, but that was pretty much all the time. “This is explicit proof that it wasn’t a lone wolf attack like the official story says. Montpellier was paying for your assassination.”

“Hm,” Rhiannon said again.

Then came the classic scowl. “I’m noticing a distinct lack of appropriate congratulations here.”

“We might be able to use those new protocols on other evidence if it doesn’t wind up with us getting sued for breach of privacy,” Rhiannon suggested.

“For doing our job?”

“Our job is to exist in uniform so Sharma Data Logistics can pass its safety audits, not actually solve or prevent crime. We don’t have the budget for that.” She sighed. Valley responded better to her dry sarcasm, but some things needed directness. “Thank you for your efforts. Now we know. I can now sleep worse at night knowing my boss wants me dead. But you do remember why, yes?”

Valley opened xer mouth, then closed it. Xe’d seen the footage of the hitman trying to talk her down first. To get her to retire or at least stay in her lane. It’d happened because she hadn’t kept her head down, couldn’t resist sticking her nose where it didn’t belong. Mayor Montpellier had manipulated the whole station just to line his pockets, and Rhiannon had to chase that lead, and all she’d found out for sure was how far he was willing to go to cover his tracks.

“Don’t make my mistake, kid,” she said quietly. “When you smell a rat, you don’t shout it from the rooftops. You look. You listen. You lock the larder and start building traps.”

Valley’s eyebrows ticked up. “Ahh. The near-death experience did not, in fact, frighten you into giving up your investigation, and you’re insinuating that I should wait for opportunities to politically dismantle him, not that I should surrender and pretend the corruption doesn’t exist.”

“What do you take me for?” Rhiannon scoffed.

She wasn’t sure if this was going all the way to getting the mayor removed, let alone thrown behind bars.  But hey, this was her first time someone in office had ever tried to arrange for her death—what did she know?

She’d do better the second time.

“When do we start the revolution? Should I make pamphlets?” Valley asked dryly.

“It all depends.” She’d meant to talk to xem about this after hours, but now was as good a time as any. Resetting the weight machine, she explained, “There’s a publicity stunt slated for tomorrow that should take a good few weeks. The mayor has declared we’re teaming up with Earth for a major sporting event. Y’know, to give us some good rep in the eyes of the people, make sure we look like fun, cooperative folk and not a place where gangsters blow up the living quarters.”

“Oh. Joy. Is it the Olympics?” Valley asked, staring into space as xe must’ve started searching the news bulletins for more information. Xer sour expression like xe’d just found a hair in xer bite of food meant xe’d found it.

“They call it the Hunger Games,” Rhiannon smiled.

The expression deepened when xe realized. “He’s not really sending representatives to die in the literal murder competition, is he?”

“Probably at least one,” Rhiannon said, stretching. Didn’t feel like exercising anymore. “Guess it’s good I stayed in shape. Been a while since I experienced real gravity. Should be fine if it’s not more than a few years.”

“It’s a random selection. What makes you think—” And Valley shut up the second xe realized nothing the government ever did was by random selection. She couldn’t help but be sadly proud of how fast xe was learning the hard truths about the world. “Shit. He’s going to arrange for it to be you, isn’t he?”

“I’m not saying it’s a sure thing, but I’d bet on me if I were you. I’ll do what I can if the time comes. If nothing else, he gets a kick out of show ponying his station leaders around, so I’ll be off-station drinking the coms leader under the table and generally trying not to do or say anything the murder capitalist country can call an executable offense.” She dropped the fluff and looked xem in the eye. “I’m trusting you and Deadeye to keep watch on things while I’m away.”

Valley opened xer mouth for one of xer snarky responses, then just nodded. Managed to straighten xer back by some new unimaginable degree. “Of course.”

Poor kid. Caused about as many problems as xe solved, but she’d miss xem anyway.

“Well. Call me if you need anything,” Rhiannon said and turned to get going. There was still a lot to get ready now that she knew for sure that the mayor wanted her dead—it meant she knew for sure what his next step was.

“I mean it,” Valley added, surprising her. “Sharma may own my ass now, but my loyalty goes only to you. And Deadeye, but you’re the relevant one in this conversation.”

She smiled a little since xe was the only one who didn’t flinch about her teeth when she showed them. “I believe you,” she said, trying not to make it sound like a goodbye.

*

It was 20 hours before the very innocently named “Reaping” ceremony began. Valley had never had an explicit deadline before. How exciting.

It took xem about 6 hours to dismantle a copy of the executable the city had sent xem here with in order to spy on how a gang accessed certain information; xe modified it and applied it to xer public profile so that xe could tell whenever someone referenced it.

Something happened. Valley snapped back into focus. In order to concentrate on coding, input to xer sensorium had been limited, and the world had been a colorless blur, a toneless mumble. It all came rushing back, painfully bright at first, along with the flickers of light and tinny chimes that xer synesthesia interpreted digital signals as. Namely, Valley refocused right on time to sense the peculiar pressure of Deadeye paying attention to xem.

Xe was in xer suite, so none of Deadeye’s security cameras could see xem, but they could still talk. <You’ve been awful quiet,> Deadeye noted. The security system’s “voice” came across as concerned, because Valley was his friend, but also somewhat suspicious because he was naturally suspicious of almost everything.

<I’ve been diligently reading smut all evening,> Valley said before editing for the fact that Deadeye took everything xe said at face value (because as an intelligence matrix, he was also naturally trusting of anyone with security clearance).

<Good golly! The surprises never cease with you, sunshine—not that I’m saying I took you for a bluenose. Is it any good?>

<I was kidding,> Valley amended quickly. <I’ve been tinkering with the codes Cosmolopolis sent along with me. Don’t worry about it.>

<Ah. You must be concentrating. Sorry about that. Do remember to save it for your shift it it’s work-related. Don’t work too hard if you’re not making bread for it.>

Bread? Oh. Money. Right. It still hadn’t sunk in yet that Valley was actually being paid now. Who ever heard of an android with a paycheck? For a moment, xe wished xe did know other androids just so xe could rub it in their faces, most of which were likely melting or freezing as they tested human survivability of unknown climates. Meanwhile, Valley had a real job, and xe intended to perform it to the utmost.

Deadeye’s attention waned, and Valley addressed a Public Services advisor to check whether xe had actual citizenship in Viper Den thanks to this job. The advisor responded automatically with an affirmative.

Good. That meant Valley was eligible for the Hunger Games as well.

Xe submitted the damning currency card as evidence of the mayor’s collusion in Rhiannon’s assassination attempt.

The mayor now had two options. He could send Rhiannon and Valley to the Hunger Games in order to try to get rid of the two people who wouldn’t get off his ass, but Valley would be able to see him referencing xer profile to make sure xe was eligible first, and altogether, it should be enough to indicate the selection of two security team members was not a coincidence and was instead a targeted attack. Or he could not send Valley, in which case xe had the all-clear to investigate the extents of his corruption.

The king was in check. Now all Valley had to do was wait for him to make a move.

[hatterstan-shameblog]

💫✨💕send this to ten bloggers you think are wonderful. keep the game going 💕✨

Have a nice day/night/dance battle with the peacocks! :D

Alright, since you are a) very cool and fun and b) you took the time to send such a lovely message, I’m going to give you a part of a fic series I started many moons ago and abandoned for other things

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Hatter Has Definitely Kissed Every Executive At Least Once And This Is How It Went:  Ann Edition��

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Rating: PG-13

Tags: Alcohol, shenanigans, everyone’s cutting loose, mild reluctance (but these people don’t turn down dares so y’know)

Summary: As a “team building” exercise, all of the Executives have met for a little get-together; and with alcohol and a rousing game of “truth or dare” involved, what could possibly go wrong?

“Ann,” Chisiya says, “truth or dare?”

Ann sighs.  Her red-lacquered fingernails tap rhythmically against the green of a beer bottle, the glassy sound barely audible above the chatting of the half-drunk executives.

“I already told you, I’m not playing.”

“The fuck you aren’t,” Niragi snaps, grip on his rifle tightening as he downs another shot of vodka, “no skips, that’s the rule.”

“If I had to do it, you have to do it,” Keiichi offers mournfully, taking a sad sip of bourbon from a crystal-cut glass, “it’s only fair.”

Ann turns her attention towards Hatter.  He’s taking a healthy swig from—ew, is that a bottle of peppermint schnapps?  She wrinkles her nose in disgust as he raises his eyebrows in a suggestive arch.

“This is a terrible idea,” she tells him for the fourth time in the last hour, “and you should feel bad for making us do this.”

“Ann.  Sweet, darling,” Hatter takes note of her unimpressed grimace, “angry Ann.  This is all an exercise in trust.  A way for all of us executives to bond.”

“And because he loves the drama,” Aguni adds.

“I really do,” Hatter says wistfully, “So, come on.  One round and then you can go back to summoning demons or whatever you do in your little basement crypt.”

Ann sighs.  Everyone is looking at her with expectant eyes.  She finishes the rest of her beer and puts the empty bottle on the table.

“Fine,” she says, “One round, and then I’m leaving.”

“The ice queen giveth in,” Chisiya says, the corners of his mouth turning up onto a mischievous grin, “So, pick your poison.  Truth...or dare?”

“Dare,” Ann says coolly, and the room erupts.  Even Last Boss, who had been lurking in the corner until now, gasps.  In a rare show of camaraderie, Niragi slaps Chisiya on the back and tells him to ‘give that bitch a good one.’

Imbeciles.  All of them.

“Everyone gather ‘round the table,” Chisiya purrs—yes, purrs—as he looks her with a twinkle in his eye, “because this particular date involves each and every one of you.”

“Even me?” asks Last Boss.

“But of course,” Chisiya says, “we need everyone if we’re going to play...spin the bottle.”

Ann feels the blood drain from her face.  Oh, this little blond twerp is despicable.  He is evil and terrible and—

“No re-spins.  No backing out.  The kiss must last a minimum of five seconds, but it can go longer if you feel so inclined.”

“I won’t,” Ann answers curtly.  There is not a person in this room she could ever want to kiss.  (Except for Mira, but.  Well.  That’s a thought for another day.)

“I don’t know,” Niragi says with an exaggerated flick of his tongue, the silver piercing winking at her in a supposedly seductive manner, “once you get a taste of a real man, you might find yourself hooked.”

“Perhaps Niragi wouldn’t be so bad,” Mira muses with a serene smile, “his oral fixation is off-putting on the best of days, but it might translate well to a more intimate experience.  That is, until he starts talking again.  Then it’ll be terrible.”

Niragi’s face twists into a sharp scowl as he tries to sputter a comeback; drunkenness and embarrassment have apparently robbed him of his mental faculties, so he crosses his arms over his chest and pouts.

“Alright, let’s get this over with,” Ann says with a huff.  

She places her empty beer bottle, label-side down, on the long wooden table.  For the first time this evening, everyone is silent.  Honestly, it’s kind of nice—it would be better if she didn’t have to end up kissing one of them, but, beggars can’t be choosers.

“You know,” Ann says, “there is a possibility it could land on me.  Does that mean I don’t have to kiss anyone?”

“That means you get to choose,” Chisiya says, “which...well, that will most certainly add some spice to the night, wouldn’t it?”

“Very evil,” Aguni concludes with a nod, “I like it.”

Hm.  Well, it was worth a shot.  

With one final, annoyed sigh, Ann places her hand on the bottle and gives it a powerful spin.  Maybe it’ll spin right off the table and shatter on the floor.  She wouldn’t have to do anything weird, and then she could just go back to her room and take a long bath.  Alone.  The way the universe intended.

It’s impossible not to watch the bottle spin, light refracting off the glass and casting flickering spots of light around the room.  It’s just a kiss.  She’s kissed people before.  Many people.  At least two.  

Friends kiss each other all the time.  Not her friends, but other people and their friends.  And these people aren’t really ‘friends,’ but they’re...acquaintances.  Colleagues.  Does that make it better or worse?

It’s slowing down now.  With each passing second, her fate is being decided by the neck of the bottle.  Mira, Last Boss, Keiichi—oh, God, please don’t let it be Keiichi, they have a meeting in the morning, that would be so awkward...

But, luckily, the bottle does not land on Keiichi.  It does not land on Niragi, nor does it land on Chisiya.  Last Boss has also been spared, as have Aguni and Mira.  That leaves only one candidate...

“Oh, Ann,” Hatter says, clapping his hands together and looking entirely too pleased with this very strange turn of events, “I always knew there was something between us!”

The thing he’s talking about is tolerance—she tolerates him because it is both sensible and beneficial to be on his good side.  He also, surprisingly enough, defers to her expertise on certain matters, which is more than can be said for her previous employers.  They are friendly, certainly, but most certainly not friends.  

And...lovers?  

Out of the question.

But Fate (and a smug little blonde) have decided that they share a moment of passion. Could she have spun worse?  Yes.  Could she have spun better?  Absolutely.  100%.  Without a doubt.

But Ann is a woman of integrity.  When she commits, she commits.  And so, as she walks to the other side of the table, she keeps her spine straight and her head held high.  She refuses to let these people see her falter.

“In addition to the parameters already given, I’d like to establish some rules of my own,” she says coolly, barely resisting the temptation to roll her eyes when he takes another gulp of alcohol.  Yep, that’s definitely peppermint schnapps he has—she can tell by the stench of it, the way it’s sharpness burns at her eyes.

She’s always hated peppermint schnapps.

“Fine, fine,” Hatter says with a wave of his hand, “as long as you promise not to fall completely in love with me in the process.”

That gets a laugh from everyone—and even Ann considers cracking a smile at the thought of someone like her ever feeling something for someone like him.  

“No tongue.  No teeth.  And,” Ann tell him firmly, “if you want to leave this room with your balls intact, I suggest you keep your hands to yourself.”

The group ooh’s at that.  Ann doesn’t look at them.  She keeps her gaze focused on the man in front of her, watching him intently for any signs of weakness.

All she gets is a smirk.

“I would expect nothing less of you, Ann,” he replies, “however, you’re more than welcome to put your hands anywhere on my person.”

He leans in slightly, almost as if he’s letting her in on a secret.

“I could even give you a few suggestions, if you like.”

What a perfectly hideous thing for him to say.  It doesn’t help that he’s fluttering his eyelashes at her like some kind of lovestruck cartoon character.  

It’s annoying.

He’s annoying.

With a roll of her eyes, Ann grabs Takeru by the silk of his obnoxious robe and crashes her mouth against his-- because she’ll be damned if he’s the one kissing her.  

Five...

The group gasps-- Takeru included, the noise muffled by the seal of their lips as she kisses him fully and firmly.

Four...

And it’s...not as gross as it could be, but it’s still a very odd experience.  His lips are soft enough, and his beard-moustache-whatever-the-fuck is scratchy in a way that is.  Well, it’s interesting.  Not good, but...interesting.

Three...

“This is fucking weird,” Niragi shouts, sounding very disgusted.

Two...

“It’s like watching my parents,” Last Boss adds, “when they were still trying to convince my sister and I they were still in love and weren’t going to get a divorce.”

One...

And done.

“Okay,” Ann says flatly as she pulls away and swallows a grimace at the sight of her favorite shade of lipstick on Takeru’s lips (and is actually a very nice compliment to his skin tone, frustratingly enough) “Can I go now.” 

For good measure, she releases his robe with a disdainful flick of her fingers and subtly brushes her hands off on her shorts.  It’s not enough to get the scent of peppermint schnapps and awkwardness off of her skin, but it can’t hurt.

“A deal’s a deal,” Chisiya concedes, his eternally mischievous smirk stretched across his cheeks, “And I must say, I didn’t expect you to fulfill your end of the bargain so...enthusiastically.”

“That’s because nobody can resist me,” Takeru gloats, bottle of alcohol back in his grip as if it had never truly left, “It’s not her fault I’m so delectable--”

“Detestable,” Ann corrects under her breath.

“--And, even though you’ll try to deny it,” Takeru continues, disregarding her comment, “both of us know that there’s a part of you that liked kissing me.”

“I liked the part when she stopped,” Mira chirps cheerfully, “In fact, I think we all did!”

“You have no idea,” Aguni murmurs solemnly into his drink, his eyes darting towards Takeru with an unimpressed look.  That’s...hm, there’s clearly some kind of story there, although Ann isn’t sure she wants to know about it. 

Everyone begins talking amongst themselves once again-- Niragi has offered to spin the bottle next, and there’s a small argument breaking out over whether or not the group should continue with their original game of ‘truth or dare’ or pivot to this new one. 

And, Ann?

Ann doesn’t stick around to find out. 

[mollymauk-teafleak]

be as you’ve always been

Alternate Title: everyone’s nb bitch, let’s get you some gender affirming underwear

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This is based on a request by the lovely @minky-for-short and some truly beautiful art of Caduceus which you can see and bask in here. Huge thanks to @tendermosses for letting me base a ficlet on their work and for always doing such amazing art for fjord and caduceus! 

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Please consider leaving a comment on Ao3 or reblogging to let me know what you think!

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Caduceus had known, since moving out of the grove and into the city, that his life went at a very different pace to most people’s. He didn’t know if it was because he was a firbolg, because he talked more to trees with lifespans of centuries than to people or because of brain chemistry reasons. But why's had never particularly concerned Caduceus, he tried to take people as they were, as long as they did the same for him.

And these people made decisions almost without thinking, they moved from one task to the next without pause, one word could send them careening onto a completely new train of thought while Caduceus was stuck on one three stations back.

And some did it so quickly, so without any kind of traceable logic, that all Caduceus could do was cling on as tight as he could and follow along in complete ignorance to see where he ended up.

But then he spoke to some of his friends and realised, to his mild relief, that no. That was just what Mollymauk and Jester were like.

He also realised that sometimes it led to very good things.

Molly and Jester were two of his closest friends and two of his most regular customers, given that the theatre where Mollymauk worked was just down the block and that Jester had an addiction to sweet things. They were usually there, talking together or with their partners, and Caduceus had grown to love the sound of their voices mixing pleasantly with the noise of the cafe.

That evening, a half hour shy of closing, they had both been sitting on the tall chairs against the counter, Jester’s short legs swinging happily halfway up, Molly’s lanky ones folded underneath him but they would have touched the floor if he’d let them. The discussion had turned to sewing, how best to work with the sequined and beaded fabric Molly needed to wrestle for the theatre’s next show without breaking his sewing machine.

Caduceus had been scoring tomorrow’s loaves with the elaborate leaf and vine patterns he liked to do, bringing his work out onto the counter because there were no other customers in and so he could listen to his friend’s chatter. Jester had been recounting a memorable night with some sequinned lingerie she’d bought the other week, how so many had come loose and turned up in places they weren’t meant to be that she’d had to buy new sheets, Molly cackling and snorting at all the appropriate places. Or, rather, inappropriate places.

Caduceus had murmured, not particularly minding whether they heard him or not, that lingerie mystified him a little but he’d always wanted to give it a try.

The immediate silence told him his friends had definitely heard. And the look they gave each other, barely concealed glee and eagerness, told him they intended to do something about it.

Which brought Cad to where he was now, legs folded almost up to his chest, in the cramped passenger seat of Mollymauk’s car. Caduceus didn’t know a lot about cars but it didn’t take much to see that Molly’s had gone beyond being on its last legs and was now running on pure willpower and prayers to the Moonweaver. It felt like the bass of the music pouring out of the speakers was going to be enough to shake it apart and Jester piped up from the back seat that the door handle had come off.

“There’s duct tape under the seat, babe,” Molly called back, unconcerned, learning forward to turn down the volume when he saw how Cad was wincing but being too awkward to say anything.

“You really don’t need to do this,” Cad insisted gently, “You’ve both been working all day, it’s getting late...”

“So have you,” Jester pointed out, voice a little indistinct through the strip of tape she was holding in her teeth, “And we don’t mind, it’ll be fun! We can help you pick out something nice! Anyhow, Beau and Yasha are at the gym until eight, Fjord too.”

“And Caleb has the kids,” Molly hummed, spinning the wheel lazily, far further than he should really have to just to take an easy corner, “This is a bonding exercise, Deucey. You need back up on something like this. You need your GNC club.”

“GNC?” Caduceus tilted his head.

“Gender non conforming,” Molly supplied, “You know, people who get it. Gender’s dead but friendship is not.”

“Your NB buddies!” Jester grinned, her head pushing in between the two of them, duct tape stuck to her horns, catching her homemade earrings with the plastic gummy bears, “Wait...your NBuddies!”

Caduceus considered that, his ears flapping a little as he took the tape off for Jester. He liked the idea of being part of a club. Even more, he liked the idea of being understood. He’d been worried about that when he’d first moved, breaking away from the grove where things were fluid and constantly changing as nature itself and entering a place where there might be rules and expectations in place that made sense to everyone but him. Where he would have to explain himself and define himself with terms that weren’t his own.

But here he was, feeling safe in a very unsafe vehicle, with friends to gladly cheer him on as he threw open the windows of the self he’d made a home in and tried new things.

Caduceus folded the piece of tape over and over in his long fingers and smiled.

“So what is it that mystifies you, exactly?” Mollymauk twitched some scandalous lace as they moved deeper into the boutique. Apparently this is where he and Jester had been coming for ages, enough that the drow behind the counter had known their names and greeted them with high fives.

“I guess...the concept?” Caduceus held his tail so it wouldn’t knock anything over, some of the displays were elaborate and delicate looking and full of things that would probably vibrate loudly if they hit the floor and that would be embarrassing, “I thought the idea of sex was to wear nothing rather than something. Where in the whole...process does this stuff come in?”

Molly nodded, managing to listen intently while dragging Jester by the tail so she wouldn’t dive headfirst into the costumes part of the shop, “Anywhere really. They make stuff you can still fuck in, if efficiency is what you’re worried about. But I think the function of this kind of outfit is to make you feel pretty, y’know? Get you in the right headspace, get you feeling yourself, yeah? It doesn’t always need to be about sex.”

“Sometimes I just wear pretty lingerie under my clothes cos it puts me in a good mood!” Jester bounced on the balls of her feet, ducking behind racks to sneak sips of the milkshake she’d smuggled past the cashier, “Helps me feel more like me.”

“Oh,” Cad said softly, tilting his head to consider the silk and satin and lace around them in a different way, “That sounds nice, actually.”

“Which is why it’s important to choose things you really like,” Molly nodded encouragingly, taking a sip of Jester’s shake and dodging the punch she aimed at his shoulder, “It’s a treat for yourself, this kind of stuff. And, when it inevitably shortens Fjord’s shorts by a good few inches because you’re going to look utterly stunning, that’s a bonus.”

Caduceus turned pink under his fur, a smile playing on his lips, “You think he’d like me wearing this kind of thing?”

“If you love yourself in it, Caddy, he will,” Jester beamed confidently.

“So...what’s catching your eye?” Molly prompted, seeing the excitement in his bright purple eyes, “They’ve got a good size range here, gaps for tails. Anything you like, they’ll have it to fit you.”

Caduceus looked around, ears lifting and whiskers twitching with interest. Anything he liked. No need to wonder if they would have things made to fit his tall, awkward body, no need to feel the pinching anxiety he’d grown too familiar with in clothing shops. A place where he could fit. And the only purpose was to make him feel beautiful.

“I like...green. And I like flowers.”

Molly and Jester shared that look again, the look of remembering when they’d had that moment of realisation too, when they’d discovered the world had space for them as they were. A look of delight at seeing it happen for their friend too and knowing they’d had a hand in it.

“Let’s get to work then,” Molly grinned.

Caduceus still had a little more time before Fjord came back from the gym. They’d checked and double checked the sizes on everything but Mollymauk still advised trying them on to make sure he was happy with them. And honestly, Cad’s excitement meant he didn’t want to wait.

So he stood in front of the full length mirror, after clearing away the clothes that were draped over it, with his hair gathered up in a thick bun at the nape of his neck, wearing little beyond the dull gold light of the sunset coming in through the windows. He’d bought three sets at the store and a few bits of jewellery to go through his piercings, actually a rather modest haul compared to what Molly and Jester bought for themselves but he was just starting out, after all.

There was one in green silk with garters and lace panels. There was a bodysuit made of mostly straps in a mossy blue colour that reminded him of water and looked pretty against his fur. But he quickly decided his favourite. The main material was sheer, meant to look like it wasn’t there at all, so the effect was that he’d laid a number of beautiful, intricately embroidered flowers across his body, teasingly concealing the barest amount.

That one he couldn’t quite bear to take off, even after he saw it fit him perfectly. Caduceus kept turning this way and that, grinning widely, seeing how it looked from different angles, touching the fabric, feeling how the stitches rose and fell under his fingertips. He looked like a dryad, wearing only sunlight and flowers, glowing from the inside out with an ethereal, untouchable kind of beauty.

And he liked it. He liked it a lot.

Caduceus had always felt mostly at home with how he expressed himself. He’d had eighty years to decide who he was and to know it was okay, that the Wildmother would always accept him and some individuals would not and that was outside of his control. Dysphoria was a word he’d learned the meaning of only after he’d moved to the city.

But this was the first time he’d been able to understand why Fjord looked at him the way he did, why he wanted him. Those dark nights when he’d lain awake with his head on his boyfriend’s chest and listened to the heart that was promised to him and wondered why, of all the people in the world, Fjord’s body stirred for him, those nights felt far away right now. Because he could see it for himself now. There was a connection in his mind, clear as day, that had been dark before.

He was beautiful. He was desirable. And this was good to know.

Caduceus mustn’t have heard the front door open, more in his head and in the mirror than in their bedroom. He mustn’t have heard Fjord throwing his bag down in the hall, his heavy footfalls across the old, creaking wood.

All Cad heard was the bedroom door starting to swing and his boyfriend’s call of, “I’m home, love, just going to showe-oh.”

Cad turned quickly, the magic broken, suddenly only able to think about the fact that he was wearing ridiculous lingerie with absolutely no warning, no rose petals or candles or glasses of champagne to try and pretend this was a deliberate surprise, “Fjord! Sorry, I...I was just…”

He faltered for words but couldn’t find any. Though it seemed Fjord was having the same difficulty. He was in his gym clothes, shirt still sticking to his chest and hair pushed back from his damp forehead with a simple band. And his jaw was on the floor. And his eyes...

“Um...Molly and Jester took me shopping today?” Cad explained, feeling heat rise to the surface of his skin for a different reason, “I thought I’d try something new.”

Fjord swallowed hard, his eyes wide and darting, unable to decide which part of Caduceus they wanted to stare at most, “Yeah? You...you look...I mean, god, Cad…”

Cad’s smile was back, flickering into life, “I look pretty, don’t I?”

Fjord gave a soft laugh, his eyes practically flooding over, “Pretty? Cad, there aren’t even words, love.”

Caduceus’ ears flapped and his tail curled in the air. He liked that. He liked the idea of things that could be said without words.

“Can I?” Fjord stepped forward, muscles coiled and ready, body telegraphing his need as clearly as a hunting animal.

“Oh please,” Cad breathed, “Fjord, please.”

It was well and truly night by the time they were done and Caduceus was pleased to learn he could feel just as beautiful once the lingerie had been eagerly pulled away. It was like a light had been switched on somewhere inside him and on it would stay.

He slept contentedly, easily, head resting on Fjord’s chest. His braid was undone, hair settling over his shoulders in waves made wild by his boyfriend’s fingers passing through it again and again. His lips were swollen pleasantly and flushed, his body would be full of well earned aches in the morning.

He was the most beautiful thing Fjord had ever seen.

He was ready for sleep himself, more than ready, but before he settled down to let himself drift away in his boyfriend’s arms, the only way he could ever really sleep completely peacefully, he had something to do. He pulled his phone out, fortunately within reach because his shorts had ended up hanging off the bedside lamp. Just a quick text, sent to two of his friends- Little Blue and Peacock according to his contact list.

thank you. seriously guys THANK. YOU.

And if Molly and Jester hadn’t been busy with their own partners, their own purchases, their own bliss, they would have seen it and grinned that grin again.

But there would be time in the morning.

[ironicarus-aaaa]

❝ i’m not used to relying on other people. ❞  

❝     ME  NEITHER,     ❞     he  replies  instantly,     brows  rising,     gaze  uncharacteristically  vulnerable.     eyes  so  wide,     and  so  emotionally  open-     a  gift  presented  earnestly.     it’s  not  often  he  finds  himself  around  someone  whom  he  can  be  honest  with,     testing  the  waters  with  natasha  feels  foreign,     yet  entirely  calming.     perhaps  they’re  merely  kidding  themselves  in  a  false  sense  of  comfort,     but  oddly  enough,     tony’s  having  a  hard  time  caring.     it’s  nice  to  hear  what  he  hopes  to  be  her  genuine  thoughts.     ❝     wouldn’t  it  be  fun  to  learn  how  to  together?     ❞      his  nose  twitches.     a  sniff.     an  attempt  to  staunch  feelings  before  they  overrun.     he’s  never  been  good  at  this.     ❝     y’know  like  a  bonding.  .  .     exercise.  .  .     ❞     bonding  exercise?     good  one,     stark.

ask  meme.

[senorarelojes]

Fic: Precious (4/?)

Title: Precious (4/?) Pairing: Dave/Alan Rating: NC-17 Additional Tags: Mpreg, ABO verse

Summary: "What's wrong with me? Am I sick?" Dave asked.

"No, Mr Gahan," the doctor replied. "You're pregnant."

Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 is here.

.

(It’s something I’m just writing for fun for @pinksyndication so please don’t take it too seriously and don’t click if male pregnancy isn’t your thing, sorry!)

. Alan was very quiet over the next few days as they left Japan, and Dave overheard Martin and Fletch gossiping that Al's pensive mood was most likely due to his explosive break-up with Jeri. Dave was happy to leave them in their mistaken assumption, because he wasn’t ready for anyone else to know the truth yet. Thankfully the Japanese dates were the last of their tour, and they were able to fly back home to the UK for the summer before continuing the second European leg in July.

Dave hadn’t wanted to go home to Basildon, so he let Jo have the flat in Bas while he searched for a new place in London. Alan had suggested that they look for a flat together since he was now technically homeless too, although Dave suspected it was because Alan wanted to be near him and the baby. Ever since he’d learned the news, Alan had been extra attentive to Dave, and he’d insisted on accompanying Dave to all his doctor’s appointments. They’d found an omega specialist on Liverpool Street, and she had the same kind, maternal air as Dr Watanabe, which comforted Dave greatly. She also didn’t seem to recognise either of them, which was a major bonus point.

They finally settled on a flat in Earl’s Court, which was quiet and peaceful, but near enough central London for Alan’s liking. It had two bedrooms, but from the first night onwards they automatically gravitated towards the same bed. Sometimes Dave would wake up in the middle of the night and find Alan watching him pensively, a hand sprawled protectively over Dave’s exposed belly. It then became second nature for both of them to sleep naked, skin to skin. Dave supposed it was one of the biological aspects of mating and bonding.

They still didn’t know whether Alan was an alpha or a beta, since they were preoccupied with the baby. When Dave had suggested that Alan go for a test, he’d simply shrugged before changing the topic to something else. It didn’t seem to be something he was too concerned about.

Over the next two weeks, Dave spent most of his mornings throwing up, then swearing at Alan for knocking him up. Alan took the abuse with good humour and spent his free time studying furniture catalogs so he could babyproof the flat. He brought Dave out to the movies and to eat at restaurants they both liked. “We should make full use of this time,” Alan said, tucking heartily into a plate of cacio e pepe. “Y’know, before you start showing.”

God, Dave didn’t even want to think about that. The pasta now tasted like paper in his mouth, but he kept eating quietly as Alan talked about a fancy new stroller he’d seen in Mothercare.

***

When Dave was eight weeks along, they agreed it was time to tell the others so they could cancel the second leg of their tour. They met with Fletch and Martin at the Mute office in Hammersmith, the four of them chatting in the reception while waiting for Dan to come in. Both Mart and Fletch seemed to assume the meeting was for the purposes of discussing logistics for the upcoming second leg of their European tour. Fletch talked about how he and Grainne were now scouting for flats in London, while Martin mused about possibly moving to Berlin. Alan was somehow able to act normally and participate in the conversation, while Dave just sat on the sofa and wished very desperately for a cigarette. 

Finally Dan arrived, juggling his mail and a takeaway cup of tea as he unlocked his office. “Sorry about that, lads. Come in.”

Dan’s office was an exercise in organised chaos. He had stacks and stacks of unheard demos waiting on his desk, along with letters, faxes and advanced album master copies waiting for him to sign off on them.  Dave took the chair next to Alan’s as Fletch made himself comfortable on the little sofa Dan kept in his office for naps, Martin perching on the arm beside him.

“So.” Dan cocked his head at Dave and Alan. “What’s the agenda for today, then?”

“Wait.” Fletch pointed at the two of them with a frown. “You lot called this meeting? I thought it was Dan.”

“No, it was Dave and I,” Alan said, looking straight at Dan. “We need to talk about cancelling the second leg of the tour.”

Fletch scoffed. “You’re bloody joking.”

“What’s going on?” Martin asked, brows knitted in concern.

“I’m pregnant,” Dave said softly, staring down at Dan’s table. Ironically, it was Vince’s face staring up at him from an Erasure press release.

Fletch and Martin immediately burst into laughter, both of them clutching onto each other in mirth. However, Dan was frowning deeply, his gaze ping-ponging between Alan and Dave. Maybe it was Alan’s grave expression that convinced him, because he was leaning forward, every muscle in his body seemingly taut with tension. “Is this true?” he asked Alan very seriously.

Alan nodded, reaching over to place a hand on Dave’s thigh. Dan looked down at Alan’s hand, then studied Dave again.

Both Fletch’s and Martin’s laughter was dying down. “Oh come on,” Fletch was saying, still smiling. “This is a prank, right?”

“No it’s not a prank,” Alan said. He nodded at Dave, who turned and reached into his bag to pull out the latest report and sonogram from their doctor. Dan took them all, putting on his glasses and studying the reports earnestly as though they were sales figures.

“Get out.” Fletch got to his feet, stomping over to hover over Dan’s shoulder so he could see them for himself. It was only a few moments before Fletch’s face turned paler and paler, his eyes wide and disbelieving. “No fucking way…”

“Wait, it’s real?” Martin jumped up, squeezing himself into the gap between Fletch and Dan so he could see it for himself. After a short while, Martin laughed nervously. “C’mon, this is a forgery, right? Good one, lads.”

Dave stood up in a cold fury. “You can all fuck off,” he snapped before storming out of Dan’s office, slipping on his shades so Suzie the receptionist wouldn’t see him crying. He found himself in the alley downstairs behind Mute’s office, desperately fumbling with a stray packet of cigarettes he’d found hidden in his jacket. He knew Alan would scold him for smoking, but right now he absolutely didn’t give a fuck.

Anyway, it didn’t matter because his hands were trembling too much to light a cigarette. He felt someone gently taking away the cig and his lighter. “Don’t do that.” At least Alan’s quiet voice helped to soothe his nerves.

Dave gave a violent sniffle, grateful that Alan pretended to look away so that Dave could wipe his eyes. “They still up there, thinking it’s a fuckin’ joke?” He was unable to keep the bitterness out of his voice.

Alan shrugged. “Dan’s talking to the two of them. At least Dan believes us, right? It’s honestly a better outcome than I expected.”

Dave eyed him. “What did you expect?”

“To be laughed out of the office,” Alan said simply. He stepped forward, folding his arms around Dave who gratefully accepted his hug.

It wasn’t long before they heard two sets of footsteps. Fletch still seemed to be getting over his shock, while Martin’s face was ridden with guilt. “All right?” Fletch said awkwardly, scuffing at his feet.

“You two came down to laugh at me some more?” Dave said, although there wasn’t much heat in it. Alan was still holding him, which felt really nice and took most of the anger out of him. Dave felt cold when Alan finally let him go.

Fletch’s jaw dropped, while Martin frowned at him and elbowed him meaningfully. “Er no, not at all.” Fletch rubbed the back of his head, the way he always did whenever he felt bad about something. “I mean, it is a lot to take in--”

“Andy,” Martin interjected, raising an eyebrow at Fletch.

“We shouldn’t have laughed,” Fletch admitted. “It was just a big shock, is all.”

“We didn’t know you were an omega,” Martin told Dave gently.

“Neither did I, mate,” Dave said with a sigh. “Only found out in Japan.”

Martin’s eyes widened. “You mean, when you had that food poisoning thing? That was--” Here, he gestured awkwardly at Dave’s belly. Alan nodded for the both of them.

“So what are we gonna do, lads?” Fletch, who always spoke with an air of strident confidence, sounded as lost as Dave felt.

“I don’t know,” Alan said, before rubbing Dave’s back. “But we’ll figure it out, yeah? You two on board with us?”

Martin nodded immediately. Fletch shot him an unsure glance before he gave them a single sharp nod.

It was definitely the best outcome Dave could have hoped for, at least.

[miraculouscontent]

Talking about the Season 3 finale time!

...yaaaaaay.

So I just want to start by saying how much of a shame it is that “Miracle Queen” was a terrible dumpster fire of an episode, because “Heart Hunter” legitimately had a lot of good things going for it. It had better pacing than usual, let Marinette have fun with Adrien and Kagami rather than be in a constant state of misery (she was miserable a few times, of course, but with good reason), gave Luka screentime and let him actually do things, built up suspense with Hawk Moth taking the Miracle Box, and it allowed Marinette to both have a breakdown and be comforted.

“Heart Hunter” was not a perfect episode, but for Season 3 standards, it was darn good. Its worst faults are things that I’ll get into soon, but most of them relate back to what “Miracle Queen” ends up being. I mean, despite how much “Miracle Queen” tries (and fails) to follow up on what “Heart Hunter” does, the two episodes feel as if they were written by completely different people; it’s like someone wrote “Heart Hunter,” got fired before they wrote the following episode, and someone else who hates Marinette and good storytelling in general was brought on and told to finish what the other writer started with no context as to what that other writer had actually planned.

But, anyway, yeah, just wanted to get that out of the way. Let’s get into the salt.

[Justice Delayed]

I'll just say it outright: I honestly didn't want Chloe to be redeemed. I'm not saying that she was outright irredeemable, but at the very least, I didn't want her getting her miraculous back.

The ultimate problem concerning Chloe is that the writers sent conflicting messages.

"Evillustrator" had Sabrina returning to Chloe, not because she's in a toxic relationship and doesn’t know how to deal with a better one, but because of a complete misunderstanding.

"Antibug" didn't have Chloe apologize for anything. Chloe gave Sabrina a gift instead of apologizing, and that's only because Ladybug brought up their relationship.

"Rogercop" completely ignored the possibility of Sabrina getting mad at Chloe for getting Roger fired.

“Despair Bear” had Chloe trying to be nice, but only to please Adrien. As soon as he was back on her side, she went back to being terrible.

"Zombizou" had Chloe feel bad, but for Miss Bustier. Like, oh, great, she sacrificed herself, but for what when Miraculous Ladybug fixes everything anyway and now Marinette is led on this idea that she has to be a good example for her bully when it was the bully getting consequences for their actions that made them react?

"Style Queen" threw in the “my mom hates me so i’m sad” card (far too late in the plot) and just had Chloe continuing to care only about the people who mattered to her: Ladybug and Adrien. They're people who are useful to her, and then "Queen Wasp" throws any intrigue into the trash by having her nearly kill dozens of people in a train crash (including Marinette’s parents, by the way) and not even feel bad about it yet still getting the sad sympathy music and the “feel bad for me” camera angles. The episode even goes further into confusing territory by having Marinette make Chloe and her mother bond over being mean to people.

After that, despite Chloe revealing herself to all of Paris, “Malediktator” has Adrien come in and make Marinette feel bad for being glad that her bully is gone, leading Ladybug to give Chloe another chance with the bee which just caused more chaos in “Catalyst” (where she insulted the one who brought it to her because he wasn’t Ladybug) when Hawk Moth used Queen Bee’s identity against her.

Then Season 3 comes along, and it is a mess. “Startrain” and “Stormy Weather 2″ featured Chloe being demanding of her miraculous (similar to “Catalyst” at least), then there was “Miraculer” which finally put the foot down on her only to do it in all the wrong ways by showing flashbacks of Chloe and Sabrina having good times (which might’ve worked had this been an episode trying to redeem Sabrina, showing why she’s attached to Chloe and going deeper into the themes of a toxic relationship with how a few nice things fool the mind) and showing Chloe resist an akuma, which no character has ever done before. It also revokes Chloe’s miraculous because she revealed her identity and not because she constantly acts like a terrible person.

And, might I add, how convenient it is that Chat Noir goes against the idea of Chloe continuing to be Queen Bee in the season where she gets her miraculous revoked. We had Miss Bustier's lesson which is presented like a good idea in "Zombizou," only for nothing to come of it, then Adrien scolding Marinette in "Malediktator," only for Marinette to take the fall for trusting Chloe in the first place.

The show can't do that. I mean, it can, but only if it wants to look hugely incompetent while doing so. This is even ignoring the fact that Ladybug had already said that Chloe was never getting the bee back. "Miraculer" stated, loud and clear, that Chloe wasn't getting it back, yet Chloe continues thinking that Ladybug is going to give it back to her.

"Miracle Queen" is not Ladybug's fault for not picking Chloe because it was Chloe who didn't listen and continued feeling entitled to the bee miraculous.

Like, first of all, Ladybug is not Chloe's babysitter. It's not Ladybug's job to coddle Chloe and give her what she wants. Had Ladybug given Chloe the bee, Chloe would've just continued believing that the bee miraculous was rightfully hers. It doesn’t matter if Chloe was good for the bee or not; they’re temporary holders and liable to replacement. “Style Queen” almost had Alya as the bee, after all, implying more of a miraculous rotation than one person on one miraculous. Even beyond that, no one who feels entitled to a miraculous should get it back, and Chloe not only falls under that category, but she trusted and liked Ladybug rather than the Miraculous team as a whole; that does not make her a viable team member.

(By the way, the fact that they had to cut the bee signal was a glaring issue; why did they not just have Mayura camp at Chloe's spot to prevent Ladybug from giving her the bee? Chloe could've easily been like, "YOU cut the bee signal because Ladybug would've come for me otherwise!" Having Mayura camp at the hotel while Hawk Moth follows Ladybug ensures the retrieval of the Miracle Box and that Ladybug won't go for Chloe even if she picks the bee. Furthermore, it was utterly pointless anyway because Hawk Moth's plan hinged on having the bee miraculous to bribe Chloe with. It banks on Ladybug grabbing a miraculous that isn't the bee - remember, the miraculous Ladybug took stayed with her to use later - and why would Ladybug care whether the bee signal was up or not? Chloe hangs at the hotel basically all the time.)

Secondly, if the issue is that Ladybug didn’t de-transform, she had no choice. Mayura had lingered around the town before, but Hawk Moth doesn't often go outside aside from the bigger battles. Ladybug knew that she’d lost Mayura and had no idea that Hawk Moth was on her tail. Had she gone somewhere to quickly de-transform, Hawk Moth could’ve either figured out her identity or at least suspected her and followed after her just to confirm, which would’ve outted both Marinette and Fu. Narratively speaking, Marinette could not have made any other choice without the show having to deal with the crisis of Hawk Moth knowing Ladybug’s identity.

Thirdly, even outside of Ladybug potentially choosing the dragon due to wanting to get Kagami away from Adrien, the dragon ended up being the right choice in the end. Ladybug had a plan put together with her Lucky Charm before Hawk Moth de-akumatized Heart Hunter, and she didn’t stutter or seem unsure of herself at all. Kagami is also completely unlike Chloe in that she accepted when Ladybug told her in “Ikari Gozen” that she wasn’t going to get the miraculous back; Kagami was even respectful and greeted Longg politely when they met back up the second time.

Kagami is a legitimately good dragon, and was also the only other miraculous wielder that Ladybug currently knew the location of. Plus, Kagami needed to be taken away by Ladybug anyway because Adrien didn’t know that there was an akuma running loose until Kagami was whisked away to help fight. Had Ladybug chosen Chloe, the team would’ve been short one cat.

(Also, y’know, dragon was the right choice again later because dragon is awesome and was used to create the water shield; as far as I’m concerned, that was Ladybug’s intuition kicking in when she picked dragon.)

Point being, I don’t blame Ladybug for Chloe’s akumatization.

Still, the fact stands that it’s all of this just to make a big deal out of whether Chloe is going to turn good or bad. All of these episodes focusing on Chloe and Chloe’s problems and giving her a sad backstory about her mom not caring about her, just to throw it all away and have her go back to the dark side.

No, I didn’t want Chloe redeemed, but even if she had been, my problem is that so much time was wasted on a bully character when the show had tons of other characters ready and willing to wear a miraculous without feeling entitled to it. We already have a rich white blond character with a sad backstory - Adrien - and he’s the deuteragonist of the show!

The reality is that, wherever Chloe ended up in the end, it never could have been properly satisfying because--

1 - There were too many conflicting messages of Chloe having some good in her and her being outright evil.

2 - It took too long to reach the conclusion of her nonexistent arc. Either it was a tedious exercise in making a Season 3 villain happen or it was a redemption that took so long to happen that people stopped caring about it.

3 - Chloe didn’t have any of the necessary steps that a good redemption arc would require (like actually feeling bad when she bullies someone and appreciating Marinette after Marinette went through so much effort to throw her a party). Miss Bustier didn’t promote giving Chloe actual consequences and even “Miraculer” refused to point out that her being a bad person was part of the problem (Chloe can’t do anything about her identity being revealed, but she could’ve done something about her attitude), which would’ve just made a redemption for her feel hollow and incomplete.

I’d rather have a dropped redemption arc than a failed one (i.e: where she’d get “redeemed” but it was too clumsy getting there), but the fact that we had to deal with episode upon episode of this girl bullying people, treating her “best friend” like trash, and constantly going back to her old ways no matter what happened... it’s infuriating, and wasted time that could’ve gone to characters who needed that screentime.

Another weird thing about it is when Miracle Queen is de-akumatized into Queen Bee. I understand that Chloe is rather childish and probably not thinking clearly, but it just goes to show how little time this two-parter has when, instead of choosing to fight Ladybug with Venom, Queen Bee tries to run away with the box, not even using her spinning top to get away.

Then, almost immediately after being tripped up, Queen Bee basically gives up all of the miraculouses except the bee on the spot, not even trying to keep them out of pure spite for Ladybug. Afterward, all Ladybug has to do it pluck the bee from Queen Bee’s head and it’s over; Chloe didn’t even try to fight back or run from Ladybug.

Heck, even the akumatization itself wasn’t satisfying...

[Satirical Queen]

I never liked mind-control akuma.

Like, ever.

Dark Cupid at least did something by not explicitly mind-controlling and just turning people into evil versions of themselves, but after so many mind-control akumas in this entire show, it gets tiring. Akumatization itself is already a form of mind-control, but it at least leaves a semblance of the original personality sometimes. This is just mind-control on mind-control.

Miracle Queen is just the next typical mind-control akuma, and she’s not even good at it. For starters, the aqua powers were already used in the last finale (as was the butterfly sentimonster but that’s not important, only aggravating) and water is the only place that the bees can’t go. Yes, Ladybug and Chat Noir would eventually be forced to leave the water in order to rescue Fu, but it’s just Queen Wasp all over again with (hive)mind-control instead of paralysis

...and a crown.

It’s also just... boring. Like, really boring, not to mention way too easy.

Hawk Moth gets the Miracle Box by beating up an old man (who basically did nothing but got turned into a ping pong ball), Chloe is literally just handed the miraculous and the Miracle Box, and then Miracle Queen can just call for anyone who’s used a miraculous before.

There’s not even any way to break the mind-control. I’ve talked about this over Princess Fragrance too, but it’s just not fun when there’s no way out besides Miraculous Ladybug, especially when Miracle Queen sweeps the city so quickly and puts almost all of Paris under her control in an instant (and she doesn’t even do anything with the civilians).

When it was just “Heart Hunter,” it was fine because we - as an audience - didn’t know the repercussions of what was happening. For me personally, I thought that the Miracle Box would be reclaimed, Chloe would get her miraculous revoked (...again), no identity reveals would happen, and Marinette would become the new guardian while Fu retires.

Nothing overly dramatic, but Hawk Moth had the miraculouses AND Fu. That was enough. Adding things on made the whole situation feel extremely unrealistic because the amount of effort Hawk Moth put into his plan gave him way more of a reward than he deserved.

He got to see the identity of every hero (Nino could be figured out by process of elimination), essentially forced the guardian to revoke his guardianship (which sounded bad on his end but put Ladybug at a huge disadvantage emotionally and just by virtue of likely not having full training), got the entire translated grimoire, and got to fix the peacock miraculous.

All he did was basically leave his house and everything just fell into his hands.

Even Miracle Queen as an akuma is laughable; Chloe in general is a laughable akuma. Antibug lasted about six and a half minutes, Queen Wasp lasted a pathetic four (her Scarlet akumatization did about double that), and Miracle Queen lasted for ten if you cut out the extra instances of Second Chance.

In order for Chloe to work as an akuma, she can’t be taken head-on. Antibug only lasted as long as she did because Marinette was de-transformed and had to renew her energy after fighting Vanisher. Miracle Queen was the same where she had several people fighting for her; as soon as there was an opening in the water shield leading to her, she was basically done.

A massive issue with Chloe’s akumatizations is that she always ends up sharing the spotlight with someone else, which cuts both her time and threat level.

Scarlet Queen Wasp was basically irrelevant but like--

Antibug had to share her episode with Vanisher,

Queen Wasp had to share her episode with herself (i.e: Queen Bee),

and Miracle Queen couldn’t even get an entire two-parter to herself; Heart Hunter was the akuma in part one and then Miracle Queen brought in her Miraculous Henchmen as soon as she could while she did nothing in the background.

At least in “Mayura,” even though not splitting the akuma up into groups was a mistake (would’ve made the plan look more thought-through and easier to follow visually), Hawk Moth was at least the mastermind of it. Miracle Queen is just Hawk Moth’s lackey, so it’s like getting a downgrade.

And... okay, while I know this doesn’t have anything to do with Miracle Queen’s competency, I have to ask: why didn’t Hawk Moth akumatize the Miracle Box? Why akumatize one superhero’s weapon when he could’ve akumatized the box that contains the things that make the superheroes what they are? Hawk Moth doesn’t try to keep the Miracle Box away from the heroes anyway because Miracle Queen keeps holding onto it, so it’s not like he was trying to protect it from being taken back.

It also would’ve given us potential mind-controlled kwami, which is far more interesting than standard human mind-control. There’s no need for identity reveals if the kwami (who can’t say their holders’ names; Miracle Queen and Hawk Moth would be very frustrated by this) are the ones who deliver the “infected” miraculouses (which then cause mind control) to their holders and possibly force them to transform under Miracle Queen’s command. Heck, maybe it’s a matter of purifying the miraculouses in the light of Ladybug’s yoyo or it being the power of de-transformation that “fixes” them, and it becomes a matter of slowly evening out the playing field as the infected heroes start to switch sides (bonus if Ladybug and Chat are working hard to protect their teammates’ identities so they have to choose wisely and lure the hero to someplace discreet first).

The other reason I’d be for akumatizing the Miracle Box instead is that it means we don’t get a season finale villain that’s just an edit of Queen Bee.

I mean, sure, Miracle Queen is technically the most creative compared to what the original form was, but that’s not saying much of anything, and it leaves “Miracle Queen” with a villain who isn’t even new-looking. It’s just more typical “akumatized miraculous holder that’s supposed to be a crazy special event until you realize that they just turn into recolors and edits of themselves” stuff. The new material in the episode is mainly Dragon Bug and Snake Noir and...

*sigh*

[Bad Things Come to Writers Who wAIT TOO LONG TO DO THEIR JOB]

Remember “Kwamibuster,” where all plots meshed together seamlessly because they were all created by one action (Ms. Mendeleiev seeing the kwami, leading Adrien and Marinette to have to protect their identities, which led to Marinette using a new miraculous to accomplish multiple tasks)?

Yeah, the two-parter doesn’t do this. Fitting the continuation of the romance plot in is coincidence at best and contrived at worst.

For one thing, Luka and Kagami are taken out of the plot as soon as “Miracle Queen” hits. Luka pulls a Chat (i.e: “let me shield this person with my body”) to protect Marinette instead of acting more thoughtfully like in “Captain Hardrock” (the bakery is literally right next to them), which makes no sense because it requires one of the bees to be ahead of all the others, thus stabbing only one of them and giving Marinette time to react to Luka being mind-controlled while also being able to get away. If Luka had demanded that she run and then picked up his guitar or something as a weapon to try and keep the bees away from her for as long as possible, that’d be different, but it just doesn’t seem very “Luka” to shield Marinette like that without doing anything else.

Kagami’s is more believable, but it’s still a matter of one bee being ahead of the others to give Adrien time to react. Adrien could've just been running away and glanced behind him to see Kagami getting mind-controlled.

It’s also a weird trade-off in general. It’s like the writers thought that Viperion appearing in part two made things equal between him and Ryuko despite the fact that Viperion was under mind-control at the time. (I acknowledge that Viperion appeared in “Party Crasher,” but that episode was literally just an excuse to throw all the male heroes together and Viperion didn’t get to do much anyway nor did Luka get any significant screentime.)

It means that both Luka and Kagami have no proper involvement with the plot going on despite the fact that they play a huge role in the romance side of things and the fact that both dragon and snake are used in the battle against Miracle Queen.

At the very least, Miracle Queen could’ve ordered Luka and Kagami (in civilian form) to fight Dragon Bug and Snake Noir, which could’ve led to a realization moment between Marinette and Adrien over just how much they really care about their alternative love interests due to just how unwilling they are to fight them and how much it hurts to see them under enemy control.

For two, I question both Dragon Bug and Snake Noir’s appearance in general. Like, just on Snake Noir, “Desperada” happened in this season and showed that Adrien wasn’t good at using the snake. While it’s totally possible that he was better at it because of the situation change or because he felt more confident having an aggressive miraculous to go with it, it’s jarring seeing him not only use the snake without question, but succeed in using it after failing at the snake so many times before.

(Also, just saying, snake and cat is a terrible combination considering that Cataclysm can destroy miraculouses and the hand used to flick the snake head is the hand that’s used for Cataclysm; the animators clearly noticed this as well and had Chat put the miraculous on the wrist that the turtle miraculous would’ve gone on.)

And while I don’t doubt that Marinette can use the dragon skillfully, it seems like the water shield - and a shield that forces out Miracle Queen at will too - is somehow a power gained by using the dragon and ladybug together, which... doesn’t really make sense? “Water Shield” screams dragon and turtle, not dragon and ladybug. While the yoyo can be spun to be used as a shield, it’s not the same type of shield that Dragon Bug creates. It could’ve been the same disc-shaped shield that the yoyo creates, but just hovering above them and making it rain over the battlefield for protection; Miracle Queen could’ve still been too afraid to intervene since she’s too valuable.

It’s also just a woefully missed opportunity that Luka and Kagami didn’t get to fight alongside Ladybug and Chat because it would’ve been a beautiful team. Chat knows both Ryuko and Viperion’s identities, so it would’ve been a team where Ladybug and Chat have the same information and it really feels even.

Unfortunately, the opening to “Miracle Queen” just summarizes how out of the main plot Luka and Kagami are forced to be. “Heart Hunter” seemed to really care about both of them, giving them sweet moments with their respective love interests (though, granted, I would’ve liked it if Luka was free after riding Marinette to the hotel and joined her in helping, so he got to participate in the fun too; would’ve been amazing as a callback of sorts to “Frozer,” showing how the interactions have changed from way back then), but as soon as “Miracle Queen” kicks in, both Marinette and Adrien recoil from them and watch them get stung by Miracle Queen’s bees soon after. Luka and Kagami go from being a comforting presence in the story to being an afterthought.

And it’s just made more confusing by things that are either dropped or added between the two parts. One would think that Chat’s line about having a girlfriend would come back in "Miracle Queen” (like, he and Kagami actually getting together and him proclaiming cheerfully this time that he really does have a girlfriend), but it’s just there and gone as if the audience needs a reminder (we don’t) that Chat can be really petty with getting Ladybug’s attention. On the opposite end, Luka playing Marinette’s song seems like typical “Captain Hardrock” Luka in “Heart Hunter,” only to turn into some sort of metaphor in “Miracle Queen.” The two parts are just so disjointed compared to the other two-parters, not helped by the fact that previous two-parters maintained focus on one/two akuma (Stoneheart in “Origins” and then Catalyst + Scarlet Moth in “Heroes’ Day”). While “Heart Hunter” and “Miracle Queen” do forward the plot in a significant way, they feel more like “Style Queen” and “Queen Wasp” in terms of execution.

Or, rather the failure in execution, along with both two-parters heavily featuring Chloe.

Speaking of Chloe, actually, the romance plot suffers from the same problem that Chloe’s did; the episodes dedicated to it weren’t given the treatment they needed. In order to save the next step of the romance plot for the finale, the show meandered around the topic, keeping Luka strangely away from Marinette during episodes where it didn’t make sense (”Gamer 2.0″) and having “Ikari Gozen” happen late so the show could dance around the topic of Marinette and Kagami’s relationship (like, just throwing this out there, but it would’ve been nice to have that “we’re friends but I still want Adrien” conversation to happen in another episode).

It’s... yeah, it’s not great. “Heart Hunter” almost succeeded in making the romance plot more relevant to the main plot by having the akuma be love-based (Kagami’s line after the fact almost makes that connection, in fact), but it was ultimately just a piece of Hawk Moth’s plan and not based on anything, like Mayura learning in “Ladybug” that Ladybug already liked another boy. The two-parter ends up feeling more like two stories going on at once and fighting to see whose turn it is, rather than one cohesive plot that ties everything together.

It’s also weird to have the Adrimi ship be in the position it is by the end of “Miracle Queen.” There were multiple episodes showing a significant attraction between Adrien and Kagami, and “Heart Hunter” had Adrien readily leaning in to kiss her and not flirting with Ladybug when Ryuko was around, but then “Miracle Queen” gives completely mixed messages by having Adrien pull away and feel conflicted by the almost kiss, only to then have him lovingly caress Kagami’s cheek by the end of the episode. “Heart Hunter” and the end of “Miracle Queen” scream “ADRIMI IS CANON,” but that one part where Adrien pulls away leaves things in the dark and hurts Kagami’s feelings because Adrien keeps doing all these things with her (HI, “FROZER”) but they don’t go anywhere romantically. It feels like a last-minute change where Adrimi was meant to be an official couple by the end of Season 3, but it was decided against because... I don’t know, they wanted it to be on roughly the same level as Lukanette by then instead?

I have no idea, but it’s a weird decision. “Miracle Queen” is full of weird decisions.

And also, you know, really dumb decisions too.

[Remember to Write (Well)]

So...

Okay, now it’s time to talk about Fu; both Fu in general and “the thing” that happens by the end of “Miracle Queen.”

For Fu in general, ever since he’s been on the run, it’s been a confusing experience figuring out what exactly he’s trying to accomplish. Hawk Moth knows his identity apparently, yet Fu - an old man who can hardly defend himself even while transformed - continues holding onto the Miracle Box, doing odd jobs here and there while Marinette undergoes guardian training...

I presume, anyway, because we literally don’t know. Basically all of Marinette’s training (both concerning the Miracle Box and overall) has been off-screen, and most of Fu’s appearances post-”Feast” were just him handing off miraculouses that Marinette needed.

I say this because Fu could’ve passed on the Miracle Box to Marinette and just visited whenever he needed to train her. Sabine is Chinese, so Fu could've easily struck up a conversation and made friends with her, giving him an excuse to visit.

Would it have stopped Hawk Moth from trying to steal the Miracle Box? Maybe, maybe not, but my point is that a guardian who can’t guard is essentially worthless and just ends up placing a giant target on their head.

In addition, while we don’t know the extent of the other kwami powers outside of the miraculous, I don’t understand why Wayzz didn’t at least try to protect Fu himself. Would the shield have been too large? The only case of a kwami using their powers outside of the miraculous is Plagg, the kwami with possibly the least self-control, and even he managed to save Adrien without destroying the city in the process, so I’m sure Wayzz could do it.

Anyway, even beyond that, I’m stunned that Fu didn’t notice Mayura’s ill state and realize that the peacock miraculous was broken (presuming that he didn’t know it was broken before). It could’ve been a great moment where Fu talks about the dangers of wearing a broken miraculous, then shouting that information to Ladybug and Chat Noir. It would’ve helped in finding Hawk Moth because they’d know to look for those kinds of symptoms (looking at you, Adrien, please get involved here) in order to find the peacock holder. Even if Gabriel still fixed the peacock miraculous in the end, I doubt that the illness just goes away, because that’d mean that Emilie would be alive and kicking by the start of Season 4.

I mean, just in general, if Fu was going to leave by the end of “Miracle Queen” anyway, why not have him and Hawk Moth engage in a battle of wits? If this was going to be Fu’s last stand, why not have Hawk Moth beat him down, taunt him, boast about how he’s a pathetic guardian since he doesn’t have all the miraculouses, then give Fu a single shot at touching the Miracle Box before promptly sending an akuma at it?

Fu doesn’t have to actually get fully akumatized - he can resist it (though considering “Feast,” the man seems terrible under pressure) - but STILL, GIVE ME SOMETHING.

Instead, Fu just kinda... goes out on a whimper. “Origins,” “Syren,” and “Feast” teased Fu’s transformation into Jade Turtle, but when we finally see it, it’s Fu hiding inside Shell-ter for the entire time.

It’s so disappointing. It’s Fu’s last chance to do anything, but in the end, he renounces himself as guardian which does... something, I guess?

Like, let’s just actually look at what happens for a moment.

Miracle Queen is defeated. The mind-control bees that Hawk Moth probably planned to use on Master Fu are gone. The best he can do is either kidnap Fu, use him as a hostage (either of these options being once the shield is down), or continue beating him senseless.

But the heroes can, like, jump. Queen Bee might have the Miracle Box, but she’s not doing anything about it; the kwami aren’t even listening to her because she doesn’t know their names. There’s no reason why Dragon Bug and Snake Noir can’t go up to Hawk Moth and Mayura and take them on face-to-face.

Yeah, Hawk Moth beat them up in “Mayura,” but they’re wielding two miraculouses now. Ladybug also wasn’t afraid to take on the butterfly sentimonster head-on in “Mayura,” so it can’t be that they’re too scared to fight it.

Hawk Moth and Mayura are literally just... chilling on the rooftop. Hawk Moth had to jump up there himself to join Mayura so like--

why not go fight them?

And while Snake Noir dismissing Sass makes sense because Second Chance was already used, Dragon Bug dismissing Longg makes no sense whatsoever.

The dragon still had two powers left in it: wind and lightning. The dragon also seems to give enhanced speed (judging from Ryuko in “Ikari Gozen”), so Dragon Bug can just rush up to everyone and take them on directly.

But instead, Dragon Bug dismisses Longg for no verbally explained reason, thus leaving Ladybug twice as helpless to stop what’s happening. Multimouse handled multiple miraculouses and was just fine, so it can’t be that two miraculouses was too much strain on her (I’ll forgive Chat warning Ladybug about unifying with Longg since he doesn’t know that she was Multimouse).

Furthermore, now that Miracle Queen is de-akumatized, she presumably can’t order around the remaining mind-controlled heroes, yeah? I mean, Queen Bee doesn’t even try and they’re just standing there motionless (Sidenote: this is why Ladybug is actually overpowered in the sense of saving people. It’s one thing to heal the damage an akuma caused, but it’s another thing for basic stuff like mind-control to not wear off unless Ladybug uses Miraculous Ladybug; that’s messed up).

Anyway, Fu is still protected in Shell-ter. Nothing is stopping Ladybug or Chat from grabbing the horse miraculous off of Pegasus, feeding Kaalki, unifying, then teleporting inside of Shell-ter to grab Fu.

Like, there, done, mission accomplished. Now Fu is back with Ladybug and Chat at the very least.

I mean, Fu renouncing the Miracle Box doesn’t even seem to do anything. Yes, it gives the ownership to Ladybug, but Queen Bee doesn’t even try to open it back up and she’s in the same state as before where she has all the miraculouses but doesn’t know the kwami names to use them.

Hawk Moth also seems to know what Fu was doing, and... I don’t know why? Yes, Hawk Moth took the tablet (we’ll get to that soon enough, just you wait) and it has the translated grimoire on it, but we never saw him read it. Like, was he doing some light reading conveniently off-screen?

This show just has a terrible habit of not showing things before they come into play. Queen Bee makes a big deal about the Miracle Box changing, but we don’t know what difference it makes. Hawk Moth and Mayura are apparently too afraid to even try to fight Ladybug and Chat even though both heroes are on a timer already, so my point about them rescuing Fu with the horse stands even stronger (plus, if Viperion and Ryuko had been there, would’ve given reason for Hawk Moth and Mayura to retreat, fearing that they’re outnumbered).

And all this - ALL OF THIS - just so that Fu can get his memory wiped because that’s the “fate of the guardians” apparently; to get their memories erased to protect the secret identities of the heroes.

Like--just...

I have a few questions.

...Sorry, did I say a few?

Because NO, I HAVE MANY, MANY QUESTIONS.

Question number one: Wasn’t Fu the one in “Feast” who said that he was trashing the guardian traditions? If so, why go for the memory wipe at all? Again, it does nothing, we had no idea that Hawk Moth would know to give up on Fu (seriously, a shot of him reading the tablet and taunting Fu about it would’ve sufficed), and the bees were gone, so Hawk Moth had no way of forcing the information out of Fu (that line was so vague, it was irritating; what, is Fu seriously going to give in to a little torture?).

Question number two: Do all guardians throughout all of history do this since Wayzz said it was a rule? How is that efficient, like, at all? What happens if a guardian trains their protege, gives up the box, and that protege dies soon after, leaving no one who would know where the box is? Are there literally guardians in the temple who just know all this guardian knowledge and keep passing it down to other guardians who will never own a Miracle Box because they just need to know it in case the guardians of a specific Miracle Box die or lose the grimoire?

Question number three: Following up on two, what happens if a guardian perishes before they’re able to relinquish the box? What happens to the box? Does ownership go to the next person who touches it?

Question number four: If the guardians’ memories are erased to protect the secret identities of the miraculous holders (according to Wayzz), why does everything else about the miraculouses need to be erased too? Hawk Moth was making a big deal out of using Fu to tell him their identities, but was Fu good for nothing else?? Marianne still presumably knows about all this miraculous stuff and there’s no big deal made about that. Heck, she even seems to know Marinette’s identity too since it was Marinette, not Ladybug, who dropped Fu off at the station.

Question number five: Why do guardians have to erase their memories if there’s no danger involved and they just need to pass down the box due to old age, especially if there’s no one else who knows about them being a guardian? Like, “better safe than sorry” or whatever, but why have a rule that basically forces them to relinquish valuable memories? If their protege is the only one who knows about them being a guardian, it’s not like the guardian would be useful at all since they already trained their protege. Thus, even if their protege went bad, there’s no need to go after the guardian.

Question number six: What if there was something important in those memories? Like, seriously, Fu didn’t even know who Ladybug and Chat were; if Fu went walking around the street not even knowing basic facts about the heroes of Paris, people would deem him senile and put him in a home or something.

Question number seven: Is renouncing the Miracle Box like, the last thing a guardian learns? If not, what’s stopping salty guardian teenagers from constantly renouncing the Miracle Box in hopes that the temple will give up on them? Fu knew about the memory loss, but did he learn it from the grimoire, and if so, where are the hints of him realizing what he’d have to do? He clearly had plans to get back together with Marianne, so what gives?

Question number eight: With how much gets erased when renouncing the Miracle Box, it ends up leaving such a risk of putting the guardian in a state of cruel confusion. Journal entries they can’t explain, pictures of people they can’t remember... it’d be a mess.

Question number WHY: How is it a good system to take people who are basically children, essentially force them to be guardians, have them waste their lives away learning all this stuff they might not even want, and then expect them to follow the rules and not be resentful of the fact that they’re going to lose a giant chunk of their memories when they pass the box down? If you ask me, that’s just begging for villains to happen.

And this whole memory loss nonsense is just character death in disguise. Fu has vague feelings towards people like Marianne and that’s it; he has no memories of even the love of his life.

It’s a cheap excuse for ANGST and nothing more. It’s supposed to be the big tear-jerker of the episode yet I’m too busy seething at how utterly lazy and stupid it is.

Like, for something that’s supposed to be so magical or whatever, the actual memory loss process is extremely basic. There is no reason for the memories to be completely erased when they could just as easily be adjusted.

For example: instead of Fu remembering Ladybug coming to him for miraculouses, he remembers her coming to him to ask if he’s okay since there’s an akuma on the loose. Instead of Fu remembering talking to Marianne about miraculouses over tea... he just remembers having a pleasant conversation with her over tea.

But instead, the Miracle Box - apparently the laziest magical object in the universe - just erases the memories completely and leaves only the strongest feelings behind, casually having Fu forget all the terrible things he did and all the lessons he learned because of those things.

Oh, oh, oh, and then there’s the tablet that Hawk Moth and Mayura stole. The one with all the grimoire information on it.

Did Fu seriously not have any security on that tablet? Like, at all? If we’re going off the logic that Hawk Moth knew what renouncing the box meant because he read about it, I can only imagine the look on his and Mayura’s faces when they expected to have to do some serious hacking, only for the tablet to open right up and them to be like, “Oh, that was way easier than we thought.”

Nathalie even said right at the end of the episode that the tablet had the method to fix the peacock in it, so they must’ve already read through it (because, with just knowing that the grimoire is on it, there was no guarantee that the miraculous-fixing method would be in it).

And this episode leaves so many things vague that we don’t even know if Marinette has any of that information. As stated before, we never even saw Fu train her to be guardian.

Does she know the grimoire by heart? Did Fu email her all the data just in case something like this happened? Fu was even the one to give her the potions, so what happens when her supply of macarons and cheese run out?

Outside of Nathalie mentioning that they have the translated grimoire, the episode just leaves us hanging. Just like how “Mayura” ignored Marinette and Fu talking about the peacock being active now, this episode ignores all the things we should be aware of so we know exactly how screwed the heroes are going to be starting next season.

It’s not leaving us in suspense; it’s leaving us questioning things that we should already know.

“Miracle Queen” fails as a follow-up to “Heart Hunter” because, instead of building on the things that “Heart Hunter” chose, it dumps every single thing it can think of onto its audience while leaving no time to explain any of them.

Adrien pulled away from Kagami’s kiss, but the endcard implies that he’s still going forward with his crush on her over Ladybug despite there being no discussion on this at all. Where is the turning point of Chat deciding to give up on Ladybug even though he wasn’t ready for Kagami?

All the heroes got their identities revealed, but what does that really mean anymore? Mayura can’t camp at everyone’s houses waiting for Ladybug to throw them a miraculous. Also, it was Chloe who did this in the first place, so is there any evidence or hints that there will be repercussions for her actions outside of getting her miraculous revoked yet again?

Hawk Moth has the grimoire, but even though Marinette’s first thought should be on it because she’s guardian now, we have no idea how much she knows or even if Fu had a backup plan for something like this happening.

Ultimately, Fu losing his memory was for shock value. That’s why it was never discussed even in the episode itself until it happened, and if angst needs that shock value to touch its audience’s hearts, it’s not doing its job.

Oh, and let’s not forget the effect this has on Marinette.

[Fool’s Marigold]

...I’m baffled.

Just... truly, honestly baffled.

I’ve been doing critiques of so many episodes of Season 3 because, honestly, most of them torment Marinette in someway, but...

Geez, if this isn’t just a culmination of all the misery she’s been through, put in a blender and set to ‘high’...

Let’s begin with “Heart Hunter;” specifically, how the episode throws blame on Ladybug for not de-transforming. Outside of, again, Ladybug really having no choice narratively (because Hawk Moth was following her and really, how was she supposed to know that when there was nothing out of the ordinary with that akuma?), it’s just ridiculous to toss even more stuff for Marinette to fret over.

Marinette has already been through more than enough this season, and there was build-up for Fu to be the one to make the mistake instead.

Like, Fu has a history of not trusting Ladybug. There’s “Feast” and also “Kwamibuster” where Fu is doubtful of Marinette’s capabilities while Wayzz has to be the voice of reason. The exception is “Queen Wasp,” but since that’s in Season 2, one could argue that something made Fu nervous about trusting Marinette (perhaps “Malediktator”? Marinette was convinced by others to give Chloe another chance, but Fu doesn’t know that).

Even in "Heart Hunter” itself, Fu questions Ladybug’s choice in the dragon. Like, yes, Ladybug may be choosing it for reasons outside of the akuma, but again, dragon ended up being a good pick in the end and Marinette has almost never failed before, so what right does Fu have to ask?

Anyway, point being, it could’ve been a matter of Fu being too anxious - too nervous about Ladybug’s capabilities - and he ends up leaving his hiding spot (maybe believing that dragon was the wrong choice), which then allows Hawk Moth to swoop in and swipe the box.

I mean, hey, if Fu’s going to just forget everything anyway, why does it matter what mistake he makes? Marinette can still blame herself for it and there could even be a lesson about thinking things through and not blaming oneself for everything (A LESSON THAT MARINETTE DESPERATELY NEEDS).

And this is basically the moment that sets everything else in motion; Ladybug accidentally leading Hawk Moth to Fu is the moment that causes all the identities to be revealed (excluding Ladybug and Chat Noir’s) and causes Master Fu to both lose his memory and make Marinette the new guardian.

It’s extreme, and--like--look. Regardless of how much Ladybug is at fault, the punishment given for it is far too severe for such a small error. Had this been almost any other episode where Ladybug went to Master Fu, there would’ve been no issues with Ladybug forgetting to de-transform.

The fact of the matter is that Ladybug is a 14-year-old girl who just gave up the person she saw as the love of her life to someone else, and even when she was trying to have a good cry about it, it’s almost immediately interrupted by Heart Hunter showing up and forcing her into action. Then, while she was heading towards Fu to get a miraculous, the show found it necessary to have her coincidentally swing by the exact two people that she didn’t want to see, throwing her off entirely. 

After seeing that Fu is no longer around, she finally gets to break down and be comforted by someone who actually knows what to say to her, but her quiet moment is interrupted yet again by an akuma.

She just finished having a breakdown, and it was already time for her to swing back into action after watching as the person who comforted her got mind-controlled because he protected her.

I could really go on and on about all the mental stress Marinette goes through in Season 3 alone, but the point is that needlessly guilting Marinette when she already has the weight of Paris on her shoulders isn’t constructive.

It’s sadistic, only serving to pile on the angst and make Marinette miserable. She has a total of four moments where she’s either breaking down or about to break down, which is insane for a proper story but also completely understandable with everything she’s going through.

The breakdown in which Luka was comforting her was the closest thing to dignity she got, but she’s not able to vent to Luka about what the actual problem is, so when she sees how bad everything really is, of course she breaks down again.

But... well, Chat...

Chat is bad at it. Like, really bad at it.

The episode tries to present both of Chat’s comfortings as touching, but they both fail and fail hard.

The first time, Ladybug is venting about what happened and how she forgot to de-transform, apologizing and calling herself a failure. Chat’s response, essentially, is to remind her of their current mission, tell her how they need her focused.for it, and to request that she just forget about it for the moment.

The second time, Ladybug is freaking out about how she can’t figure out the Lucky Charm, apologizing again and calling herself useless. Chat’s response this time is to first tell her to focus, then simply place his hands on her shoulders and say, “Ladybug, no.”

Neither of his comfortings involved him telling her that she either wasn’t a failure and/or wasn’t useless.

And just by the way, I have a serious bone to pick with that Lucky Charm she summoned. This somewhat correlates with what I was saying about shock value, but why would Fu keep that key with him? Why wouldn’t he give it to Marinette at the very end of “Feast” and go, “if something happens to me, you’ll need this”? It’s banking on Ladybug either summoning the key as her Lucky Charm (and Fu recognizing it, because apparently he can’t remember the woman he shared his guardian secrets with but he can remember that he has a key to a locker that contains the thing he kept the Miracle Box in), or that Marinette/Ladybug happens to be there when this happens to him and he happens to have just the right prompting to give her the key in the first place.

And for another thing, the Lucky Charm is just another excuse for Ladybug to freak out and self-deprecate. Of course Ladybug would have no idea what to do with it; she doesn’t even know what it’s for, which is something no other Lucky Charm has been established to do.

Now, if the Lucky Charm had been seen by Fu, giving him the realization that he needs to renounce the Miracle Box, that’d be different, but that’s not what happens. Instead, Ladybug is looking around frantically for a way to make a Lucky Charm work when it’s not supposed to work, and either way, Fu had no way of knowing that she’d hold onto it long enough for his amnesiac self to see it and know what it was.

And Ladybug clearly didn’t know about the memory erasure. Hawk Moth and the kwami were the ones to react to Fu preparing to renounce the Miracle Box.

This means that Marinette has been training to become guardian with no knowledge of eventually having to give up her memories. Unless Fu had a plan (perhaps involving the box being revoked to Ladybug instead of Marinette, but in the moment, it seems more like something that just made sense for the sake of protecting her identity), he essentially gave Marinette no warning about this when he started training her, subjecting her to the same fate that he didn’t want himself.

And this just furthers the idea that Ladybug isn't allowed to feel anything because the slightest missteps end up causing disastrous consequences. Marinette has to constantly bottle up and suppress how she feels because it means either getting akumatized or the universe fighting back against her, which just leads to her feeling more emotional down the line because that way of thinking is unhealthy no matter how necessary it might be for her to do her job.

Now, if I were Marinette, the FIRST question I would have after becoming guardian is if I'll have to erase my memories too, but we all know that it'll either never be addressed or come out of nowhere if/when Marinette has to renounce the Miracle Box herself.

And while I feel terrible for the poor girl, she doesn't deserve to have all of those memories scrubbed away when there are valuable memories in there. It's sad that she's going through this, but it'd be sadder for her to be forced to let go of memories that she might want to hold onto.

Not to mention, it's all this just because she was hurt that she had to let go of the person she loved. Fu even acknowledges it as her mistake without putting any semblance of blame on himself, so the plot clearly blames Ladybug for this.

Because of her, the identities of all her temporary heroes became known to Hawk Moth.

Because of her, Hawk Moth has the translated grimoire that she might not even have herself.

Because of her, Fu renounced the Miracle Box and gave up his memories in the process (oh, and of course they have to add in a line where he says that he'll never forget about her; twist the knife even more, why don't you?).

Because of her, she now has the role of guardian and has to keep the miraculouses protected. She was sobbing in "Heart Hunter" over all the responsibilities she had and how she couldn't be who she truly was, and the show's apparent solution to that is to give her more responsibilities and take away the one person who knew her secret,

Because, let's be honest, Marinette can't talk to Marianne about this. It's apparently all Marinette's fault that this happened, so Marinette can hardly throw any of her troubles at her when this whole situation caused the man Marianne loved to forget about her.

And Tikki doesn't even do anything. Even when Marinette is all alone, reading Fu's letter, Tikki doesn't come out to offer comfort or just generally be there for her holder. The show chose to have Tikki do nothing while even more weight is being put on Marinette's shoulders. Yeah, maybe Tikki is busy mourning the loss of Fu, but we don't know because they didn't show it.

And just thinking about it, the show literally punished Marinette for doing the right thing.

All throughout the series, Marinette has been repeatedly punished for trying to make progress in her life. Attempts to drop Adrien as a crush led to her friends arguing about it, and attempts to confess to Adrien either ended in failure or embarrassment. Her being happy that Chloe was gone led to a scolding from Adrien, and when she tries to give Chloe a chance, it doesn't work out for her. When she then tries to respectfully revoke Chloe's miraculous, she gets stabbed in the back by Chloe allowing herself to be akumatized so the identities of the temporary holders can be revealed. When she tries to out Lila, she's yelled at and told by Adrien not to do anything, eventually leading to her expulsion that was only reversed because Adrien did just enough to get Lila to undo the damage.

Marinette knew that Adrien had feelings for someone that wasn't her; he told her as much. She recognized that Adrien and Kagami had a bond and decided to let them be together because it was the right thing to do.

And she was punished for it. She was punished for having a reaction; for having feelings.

We don't know what Season 4 holds for her, but judging from how she's treated in Season 3, it can't be anything good.

Buckle up, people.

[its-sixxers]

Dang now I'm thinking about nines turning mary 😭

It’s something that’s crossed both of their minds, hypothetically. Nines considers it very briefly when she’s still human (the context you’ll see in next chapter...) but he places a lot of value on autonomy so, y’know. Wouldn’t do it unless asked and there was no other option, given that there’s some blood bond stuff that goes on between Sire and Childe regardless of their actual thoughts on the matter. You see some of this with Isaac and Ash in Bloodlines.

Mary thinks about it once she’s able to sort her blurry memories of life into order and realizes she knew Nines before her Embrace. She battles with a bit of resentment and anger at first. As she sees more and more of the world of vampires she ends up realizing why he didn’t tell her anything or Embrace her - her life as a human was simpler and much safer and leaving her alone was probably the best option. Still, sometimes she gets caught up in the what-ifs - if she was a Brujah and could walk the streets with confidence, if she could talk to humans without having to expend effort and blood to pull a disguise around herself. After meeting Ash, though, she realizes it’d be a very bad idea - she could see herself resenting Nines and thinks that if he was her Sire their relationship would be much more strained.

There’d be totally different power dynamics at play between them, both from the whole blood bond thing and also Nines being of higher generation (farther removed from the grand pappy of all vampires) than Mary’s actual Sire, Casimir. She’d be weaker and might not have been able to pull off the crazy stunts she does. Mary as she is could totally wreck his shit and I think it’s a much needed component for their dynamics.

A fun thought exercise, though!!

[shiningstages]

@aaetherius - { Lancelot and Vane! }

send me an otp (headcanons)

Who’s the messiest one: Lancelot. All outsiders looking in would be surprised by it, but everyone who knows them knows that, while the captain of white dragons may be diligent and take utmost care of details in everything else, that wasn’t the case for his messy room or study (though he somehow knows where all his papers are, even if they’re stacked and scattered everywhere). Vane, on the other hand, loves doing household chores and simply tidying things up in general, so his desk and room are one of the best kept places (on the ship or at home in Feendrache). He also helps Lancelot tidy things up, either just in spurts of inspiration to clean or if the other really looks like he needs the help.

Who feels the most uncomfortable about PDA: I don’t think either of them feel uncomfortable at all? I would say Vane is the more flustered of the two when it comes to PDA, partially because he feels embarrassed to show like that in general, but also partially his thoughts on not really expecting or deserving any kind of romantic gesture (looks at vday and white day lines). Though I also think he’s a huge romantic (looks at the picnic from his SSR fates) and can be very boisterous and outgoing in expressing his love for Lancelot (one day he will bridal carry him; cuddle him real close; the good stuff, and all while Arthur and Mordred look on in awe). But Lancelot is also pretty romantic, and I’d argue probably the initiator of a lot of romantic or tender moments (probably 60/40) so I don’t think he’d be uncomfortable with PDA unless he has to show his captain persona in front of royal officials or foreign guests (though I think the king gives them his blessing, even if they don’t know it).

Who's the funniest drunk: Lancelot actually getting drunk is funny in it’s own right, so that in essence would make it his win. Yet I could see both of them letting go of all their inhibitions (read: insecurities) when under the influence in equally interesting ways. Lancelot is probably more of a talkative drunk in my mind; not necessarily spilling every secret he has, but certainly his mouth is unhinged and he can go on about any topic for hours. Vane is a more party and crying drunk; he will make sure everybody is having a good time but also fully indulge himself in fun activities, but catch him when the mood isn’t as bright and he’s crying away every insecurity or even just any thought he has (“this shibe………*sniffles* it was so cute, but i couldn’t pet it;;;” like literally anything about his day he will remember and cry over). Though I also think they’re both sleepy drunks, and as soon as they have one too many, they actually get a good night’s sleep (but not in a very healthy way, and they are gonna regret everything the morning after as they take some pain meds).

Who texts the most: Vane! While they’ve both texted back and forth quite a bit, Vane always texts in the morning and at night to make sure Lancelot has a good day or gets some rest, and also messages him a lot of reminders (either general things he’ll need that day, or just to tell him he loves him, or just like “oh this song i heard reminded me of you!” or a quote that did or something like that). I would like to think that he also sends lots of emojis sometimes, though it’s more to express tone and not to spam (though if they’re texting through LINE then he might spam one too many stickers).

Who has the most embarrassing taste in music: I feel like Lancelot just feels embarrassed over the fact that someone could happen upon his swing collection at any moment, though I also feel like they’d both really enjoy swing or jazz a lot. Maybe the more embarrassing would be if he ever had a punk faze and someone found rock or punk mixed in with the swing and classical music (or if anyone sees him rocking out to Aoidos/Benjamin).

Who reads the most: Lancelot! I feel like reading stimulates Lancelot’s mind, but also gives his mind a total break from work to focus on more uncharted seas of pages, making it maybe one of the better activities for him to relax to while not feeling like he’s indulging too much in himself (he’s exercising his brain after all~). Vane probably likes reading too, though he’s more for reading to people rather than for his own amusement (he admittedly gets tired a bit too quickly when reading a novel).

Who’s better with kids: Vane! While I think they’re both great with kids, and nurturing and fun with them in their own ways, I feel like Vane is the less afraid of the two to tackle everything there is when it comes to babysitting or playing around. He’s quick to be the fun big brother and carry them around on his arms, the reassuring ear whenever they seem hung up on something (and is very good of thinking of answers to questions on the fly, except for “where do babies come from?”), and being both stern but understanding when they get hurt or hurt something (drawing on the walls, breaking vases, etc.). In a next life, he could probably make a really good preschool or elementary school teacher (he’d probably be good with all ages, but the lil ones just adore him y’know?).

Who’s the one that fixes things around the house: I feel like both of them are technically savvy at this, but they both have different approaches. Vane sees a thing broken or the sink is being weird, and he goes headfirst into using what they have around to fix it (or he does go to the store if he knows what will fix it but they don’t have it). Lancelot is more the type to look at the thing that needs fixing, looking up through searches and possibly his memory of this breaking in the past, and then gets everything he needs to fix it (possibly even having multiple solutions ready should he need any backup plans).

Who’s got the weirdest hobby: I would like to say none of their hobbies are very weird. Outsiders may think a man who loves to clean and do laundry is a bit out there, but it’s not a very eccentric hobby either. And maybe studying tactics and collecting weapons could be seen as a bit much, but could also be seen as just working too hard given their main verse jobs. So there’s a bit of weirdness but also a lot of understanding to it, so neither of them really beats out the other.

Who cooks and who cleans up: *points at the first question* Vane has always loved to cook (says the girl who hasn’t read the bistro event yet) and very much loves both being in the kitchen and tidying things up. So, if anything, Vane kind of forces himself into being the one that cooks dinner and cleans up around the house. Though Lancelot certainly tries to tackle both to help Vane out, not wanting the other to overwork himself or take on all the responsibilities, but that’s also if Vane lets him help (less out of a desire to dominate those areas, but rather more out of a “i’m already doing it, and you deserve some rest Lanchan!” type attitude). Though he does certainly let Lancelot in, especially if one of them brings about cooking a new recipe or cleaning up the office as a bonding moment.

[oohlook-thevoid]

Ok I’ve literally been unable to stop thinking about all the books I loved as a kid so I’m going make a list of like my favourite childhood (meaning stuff I read from yr 1 to yr 8 roughly) book series/authors because I can (with like random anecdotes relating to them for some). And maybe if it’s out the brain I can start chilling again. (I’m fairly certain this will be long as hell)

Ruby Redfort - Lauren Child I have several memories relating to these books because THEY ARE THE BEST. Ok, so first memory is how I got into them. My town has a local lit fest and the year this first RR book came out, Lauren Child came and did a talk there. I went with my mum and it was super cool, I got the first book (signed!) and fell in love with the series. I also remember she gave away a like unfinished copy of the book to another girl in the audience. She also spoke about how the author of the RR books mentioned in Clarice Bean had given her permission to write about the character and I believed her; like me and my mum left and I was like going on about how I wanted to read the other books and then it turned out they weren’t real. Also that year I dressed up as Ruby for World Book Day at school: I wore this hand me down slogan tee with ‘so over it’ on and a hairgrip with a plastic fly glued to it. The other strong memory of the books I have is actually to do with them. Y’know the scene (in I think it’s book 2) where Ruby’s hiding and she describes hearing the tap of Italian leather shoes and you know it’s The Count. Like that scene makes me lose my shit everyday I remember it, like I had major chills when I read it. 

The Declaration trilogy - Gemma Malley

13 Treasures trilogy - Michelle Harrison 

My Secret Unicorn - Linda Chapman

Stardust - Linda Chapman I distinctly remember I returned one of the books from this series to the library. When I went to take something out next I was told I hadn’t returned it. I went and checked and found it on the shelf. That was the beginning of my dislike for the local librarians (the rest occurred when I did work experience there many years later).

Rainbow Magic - Daisy Meadows I absolutely adored this books as a kid. There was one in particular (the one about the fairy w/ the same name as me) that I treasured. It was my comfort book and if something was up with me it was obvious because I was reading that book again. Unfortunately I decided I was grown up and gave them all away a few years ago which sucks coz I could do with my comfort book again.  Another thing, recently I looked these books up for some reason and discovered Daisy Meadows is a pseudonym for multiple authors and that one of the writers was in fact LINDA CHAPMAN of several other of my fave childhood book series. Absolutely wild.

Dolphin Diaries - Lucy Daniels Guesss what? It’s another pseudonym in children’s literature. Turns out Dolphin Diaries was written by Ben M. Baglio. I’m beginning to think my entire childhood was a lie. 

Tiara Club - Vivian French

Sophie Mckenzie books I’m not sure if this was in one of her books but I do remember that around the time I was reading all her books I read a book where and American character ended up in London. She was in the bathroom and she heard a local person talking and went off on one (in the narrative) about how this person should move to the USA where her accent would be appreciated. To this day, weirdest scene I’ve read. I hated it. But I loved Sophie Mckenzie’s books. 

Uglies - Scott Westerfeld In year 8 we had a booklet of extracts we were studying. The final extract of the booklet was from Uglies which, coincidentally, I had recently read (as had one of my friends). Unfortunately, we never studied it in class. Largely because, whilst he was strict and scary as hell, the teacher we had was super easy to distract. He was ex-army so all someone had to do was bring that up and he’d go off on one for ages. There was also another lesson where somehow the class ended up discussing spongebob for most of the hour. 

Jacqueline Wilson books I mean, I wouldn’t be a British girl if I hadn’t read a ridiculous number of Jacqueline Wilson books; Hetty Feather was my favourite. Also, in like year 5, I lent my copy of Dustin Baby to a girl in my class. Never got that book back. 

Enid Blyton books Specifically the boarding school ones (St. Clares, Malory Towers and Naughtiest Girl). I actually used to get the Naughtiest Girl books instead of money from the tooth fairy. I guess my parents must have got the box set cheap and decided that this was a good idea. And tbh it was. 

Lady Grace Mysteries - Grave Cavendish Another case of a pseudonym - Grace Cavendish was the main character, not the actual author. Anyway, I read this when I was in like yr 4 which was also a time when I couldn’t sleep well and I was awake a lot (idk why). My parents, not having technology to blame for problems as they do for my brothers now, decided these books were to blame and banned me from reading them. So that was fun. 

Gwyneth Rees books My year 1 teacher (who was, like, the best) got me into these books, that’s it.

Meg Cabot books So, I really only got into these books because two of my friends loved them. These two friends would often wander off w/o the rest of the group to talk about boys and their crushes. That’s mildly relevant, the point is I read these books (and did enjoy them) purely because one of those friends liked them and I had a crush on her (not that I actually realised that at the time). 

An Unfortunate Fairy Tale series - Chanda Hahn

Iron Fey series - Julie Kagawa Both this series and the one above were the specific genre I was reading when I was 12/13. Like books where a girl is not normal and there’s a mean broody fae love interest with black hair and blue eyes was my shit back in the day, I was reading many series like it but these two are the ones I still have positive thoughts on. Anyway, I distinctly remember reading books like this and listening to Taylor Swift constantly. I was like trying to bond with my friends like yeah my type has black hair and blue eyes (coincidentally a similar appearance to a guy who asked me out around the time, we’re not going into that mess though but I didn’t date him, we’ll leave it at that). Anyway, more than anything these books combined with Taylor Swift songs was my way of staving of the realisation I’m gay and of trying to make myself straight. It clearly wasn’t that effective. 

House of Night series - P.C. & Kristin Cast

Vampire Academy + Bloodlines - Richelle Mead I had these series on my nook. I read them way too much purely because it was easy to. Now, my nook is broken and the account inaccessible so they’re lost to the ether. 

Jackson Pearce books Oh god. Ok, so when I read Sisters Red, it was the first book I’d read with swearing in. I remember going to my mum and being like there’s a swear word because I wasn’t sure I was allowed to read that and I didn’t want to be found out and end up in trouble. So that was fun to.

Fantastic Diary of Bathsheba Clarice de Trop series - Leila Rasheed

Sita Brahmachari books Artichoke Hearts in particular, I just remember loving it and then reading all her other books that were in the school library. 

Rose series - Holly Webb

We were liars - E. Lockhart So this is one of the only stand alones here but I have to mention it. In drama we had to sit and read quietly as the teacher went through the register and called us up to see our exercise books. I was reading this book. I also happened to finish it before I was called up. I was crying, knowing I’d have to talk to my teacher in a few minutes trying to not look like I’d been bawling.  

Cathy Cassidy books

Thora series - Gillian Johnson

Journey to the River Sea - Iva Ibbotson

A year without Autumn - Liz Kessler

[packsbeforesnacks]

Notes on Camp || Orion & Winn

TIMING: Friday, April 10th, 2020, Sunset LOCATION: Somewhere in the Foothills of Appalachia, Maine PARTIES: @3starsquinn & @packsbeforesnacks SUMMARY: Rio and Winn were supposed to go on a retreat for their theatre class. Winn gets them lost. Maybe the real camping trip was the friends we made along the way! (feat. Yeth Hounds) WARNINGS: None.

There were few things that Winn enjoyed more than a good ol’ fashioned campin’ trip. And given his run-in with the asanbosam earlier in the week, he was more than happy to get out of White Crest for the weekend. Darbussy had been ecstatic when the sun came out on Monday evening, now no administrative excuse for why the retreat would have to be cancelled. He knew Blanche would hate it — hell, Orion probably would, too. But it would be a good bonding experience. Probably.

Blanche had laughed him off the phone when he’d called her to see if she was ready, which he took to mean that she’d put off packing until the last possible moment. Orion seemed like he had a good head on his shoulders, though. He’d be packed, for sure. So, Winn drove to the library, whistling a happy tune.

He pulled up on the curb, and honked twice. Winn didn’t want to kill Orion, so he’d dressed conservatively — a loose tank that showed off his arms and only a hint of his pecs. Tasteful side boob, as it were. He honked one more time for good measure, just in case the younger man hadn’t heard him, and set about fiddlin’ with the radio before decidin’ he’d toss Orion a bone (ha) and the AUX cord.

This was gonna be great.

Orion was a mixed bag of emotions, but what else was new? Sure, he did want to hang out with Blanche and Winn. If only his desire to make friends was strong enough to completely destroy the fear of embarrassing himself in front of them. But alas, it seemed like that wasn’t going to go away anytime soon, so instead he would just have to force himself against his own judgement and will to go camping. Really, the only thing he could hope for was that he didn’t have a straight up panic attack like last time, or at the very least that the two found his awkwardness endearing. It was all he had going for him.

Of course, when Winn had offered to drive, Orion wasn’t going to disagree, but he certainly wasn’t about to let Winn pick him up from his house. If his mom had been home… well, Orion didn’t want to think about that. If his family found out he was going out in the woods camping with a werewolf? They would implode. That was how he ended up at the library, bag full of clothes, supplies and snacks awkwardly resting at his side while he read one of the books he had planned on checking out to bring with him. Just in case he finished one. He didn’t know Winn’s sleep schedule, and if Rio found himself up late he could get some good reading in.

The horn cut through Rio’s hearing like a bullet, catching him off guard and forcing him to jump (much to the surprise of a few other students around him; either they hadn’t heard the horn or it wasn’t nearly loud enough to scare normal hearing). Assuming that may be his ride, Orion jumped up and slung the bag over his shoulders. He tucked the stack of books under his arms and ran over to check them out, another honking lighting up his senses. At least he didn’t jump that time.

Orion waved on his way to the car door and opened it up, tossing his bag in the back as well as his stack of books. “Hey! Thanks for picking me up.” Of course, Winn’s muscles were on full display, and Orion rubbed at his eyes to force himself to look away. He climbed into the front seat, holding onto one of the books that he had checked out. “I’m excited!” Mostly.

The corner of Winn’s mouth tugged upward into a half-smirk as Orion took the front seat of his car. ‘Course, who was he to argue with dibs? Blanche hadn’t been ready, so Blanche could lose her seat. ‘Sides, he was more than willing to get to know Orion. Since their ill-fated acting exercise, he’d tried to stick close to the younger man, the same old instincts that made him go into counseling cropping up. Wolves ran in packs, and Winn wouldn’t deny he made friends — or, folks he would call a friend — fast. And since Orion was clearly uncomfortable with Darbussy’s constant needling at all of their expenses, Winn figured he could be (somewhat) of a buffer. He was broad and charming, and Blanche could take care of herself.

Given that Orion had been fairly normal around him — other than the occasional raised heartbeat, which, right, Winn still needed to organically bring that little tidbit up — Winn figured he was doing a half-decent job of making sure he stayed under the radar in his attempts. Darbussy had seemed to notice, though, and, for better or worse, paired Winn and Orion up for exercises more often than not. There was, strictly speaking, less touching and certainly less kissing involved than their initial encounter, so it had been fine — even fun! But Winn still felt like he didn’t really know the other guy.

He glanced over to make sure Orion had buckled himself in (humans were squishy!), and noticed Orion was rubbing at his eyes. He wasn’t yawning or nothin’, but the joke came easy: “Stay up late partying?” Winn chuckled. Thirsty Thursdays, indeed.

But Winn didn’t really think Orion was that much of a partier, if at all. After all, he’d seen the books that Orion had slung into his backseat. Was he doing homework this weekend? Gross. Not if Winn could help it. But then, there was one in the other man’s lap. Maybe he… just liked reading? Winn knew he liked comics. And if nothing else, Winn was great at small talk. “Whatcha got there?” he asked, sticking a thumb out towards Orion’s lap as he pulled off the curb outside the library and drove towards Blanche’s house.

This was going to be fun, right? This was going to be fun… This was totally going to be fun. This would be fun! If Orion told himself that enough he would create some self fulfilling prophecy. He wasn’t really worried about the company, at least not exactly. If anything he was worried about himself in front of the company. Orion had learned that he seemed to make himself far more nervous than other people had the ability to. Not that people like Winn or Adam couldn’t do just fine prickling Rio’s nerves on their own. But Orion seemed to always find a way to make things even worse.

“Ha ha.” Orion fake laughed at Winn’s joke, shooting him a side eye and trying to keep himself calm and collected. No need for nerves right now. “Just stayed up late I guess.” Not exactly an exciting answer, but it would take a bit longer for Rio to find his footing before he could try for a joke. Orion kept glancing over at Winn, mostly because he hated himself he supposed. It was supposed to be sunny today, but still not above the 50’s, which made Winn’s choice of outfit stick out. Knowing what Orion knew, the cold probably didn’t bother Winn much anyways. On the opposite end of the scale, Orion was probably getting ready to sweat during the hike today. He had worn a long sleeve shirt with a hoodie on top of that plus a pair of track pants. But he wasn’t about to make the same mistake that he had with Skylar at the Farmer’s Market.

“This?” Orion asked, flashing the book that he held tightly in his hands. “Nothing, really. Just a book on Norse Mythology. I met this guy who speaks some Scandinavian who offered to help with some translations if needed. So I’m going to reread through some of these and try to pick some out that I hope he can help with.” Orion smiled nervously. That may have been the lamest thing he could possibly have said to Winn, but oh well. Despite Rio’s desire to make some friends in this town, he also wasn’t exactly prepared to change anything about himself to do it. “You uh— Ready to do some hiking?”

“Couldn’t sleep?” Winn asked, trying to pry a scrap of information out of Orion. He was beginning to sense he was maybe, a little bit, out of his element. It wasn’t that Orion was a brick wall, precisely, more than Winn didn’t know what to say that wouldn’t be taken the wrong way. He wished, like with Noah, he could just push past the awkwardness and into a blossoming friendship. But, well. Maybe Orion would open up if Winn revealed more about himself? “Can’t get to sleep myself, a lot of the time. Have to take a sleep aid to get me there.” Among other things. But he’d hold off on suggesting Orion try weed or, well, any of the supernatural drugs and sedatives that Natalia had hawked in his direction. The younger man seemed a little clean-cut for that. Not that Winn really knew. “You look snug as a bug in a rug, though. I run hot. Heck, even in midwinter I was only puttin’ on pants when I had to be somewhere, y’know?”

His ears perked up at Orion’s mention of Norse mythology. When Winn was younger, before he’d gotten involved in sports and his afternoons were burned away with practices and games, Winn had had an ongoing, but passionate, love affair with his father’s stacks of myths. He’d learned a little bit of everything and, while he’d forgotten most of it, he couldn’t deny that he’d cottoned onto the Norse myths the best — the idea of different realms, of the deep magic in those stories, enraptured him. Made him an easy target to believe in werewolves, he supposed. “What’s your favorite part about it?” he asked excitedly. “My favorite deity is probably Frigg or Freyja, though I know some folks think they’re the same goddess or came from the same goddess? ‘S kinda cool, right? Like, Frigg having the whole “I see the future” thing and havin’ to keep it secret and be kind of mysterious. I, uh.” He coughed, blushing a bit. Most of that had jumped out of him before he’d even really thought about it, and he’d been about to talk about wonderin’ if the gods and goddesses were real. That’d prolly be a step too far, even for Orion. He pivoted. “I, uh. Dunno how serious y’are in myths and whatnot, but I can read Chinese. Simplified and traditional. A little out-of-practice, but if you, like, needed help, I could help. If you needed help.” Wait, shit, he’d already said that. He decided to take the lifeline that Orion had given him.

“Shit yeah, bro,” he said, fist pumping to no one in particular. “Hiking is the bomb. Gettin’ out into nature, really seein’ what’s hidin’ in the woods? If you’re lucky, o’course. How ‘bout you? Could prolly carry you on my back, but it’s a lot more fun for the both of us if you can keep up.” Shit, was that offensive? Orion was kind of small, but it’s not as if Winn knew his, like, muscle mass. Maybe he worked out. He fumbled, again, shit, he was really putting his foot in his mouth today. “I, uh. If you want some music, there’s, like—” he gestured vaguely at the AUX cord hanging out of the cassette deck “—that whole thing. Should work. I’m into most everythin’. ‘Course we can just keep talkin’, so long as it’s not, like, dead silent. ‘Course, when Blanche gets in here, there’s no chance of chatter dyin’ down… Actually, speakin’ of which, I should give her a call, we’re only a few minutes out. Y’wanna stop and get some grub before we head out or wait until we get there? This car’s taken its fair share of food stains, so don’t worry your pretty little head about bein’ polite. I can scarf down with the best of ‘em.”

Orion shrugged. He didn’t talk about his sleeping issues much. The nightmares kept him up a lot of times. They weren’t usually as bad if he was sleeping at the Scribe Headquarters. He figured that was because he was away from his parents and that house. Still, the headquarters kept him busy enough that he usually ended up staying up way too late into the night reading anyways. “I uh—I get distracted easily.” That was the simpler way to put it. He didn’t feel the need or desire to delve into the nightmares right now. Not exactly an easy or friendly conversation. “Really? Sorry to hear that. I—” He wasn’t sure what Winn was implying when he meant sleep aid. Like sleeping pills? Or something else? “It depends on the night.” Rio crossed his arms instinctively. Rio wished that he ran cold, so the outfits would make more sense. But he had adjusted. “Oh yikes. I’d freeze to death.” He laughed nervously, trying to push the thought of Winn without pants far from his brain.

Orion had to admit that he was pleasantly surprised by Winn’s interest in Norse mythology. Not that Orion had wanted to judge a book by its cover, especially considering that first interaction the two had during the improv class. Plenty of Winn’s choices had taken Orion by surprise that day. But here the two had found some sort of common ground—and just the thought of talking about something like Norse mythology was enough to put Orion more at ease. “Oh, those are great! Yeah, there are a lot of stories that equate them to being the same deity, but regardless Freya was crazy cool. Some of the stories credit her with teaching Odin what he knew about magic. That’s so crazy cool. Since Odin would go on to be one of the mainstays of Norse Mythology in popular culture.”

He thought on things for a moment. “Obviously Ragnarok is an incredible story. Everything about it is just so… grandeur. It makes some other mythologies look like children’s stories. Which I mean, I guess a lot of, like, Greek mythology has been turned into a children’s story. But it probably shouldn’t be, you know?” A giant grin spread across Orion’s face at Winn’s offer, not knowing that about him. He paused for a moment, not speaking as he tried to home in on a few of the words that he had learned of Chinese: “That’s so cool!” It was broken up and the pronunciation could have been terrible for all Orion knew but he was like 90% sure that he had at least said the correct words. Whenever he started learning the basics of a new language, he usually started with phrases that he said a lot in English. ‘That’s so cool’ was probably one of Orion’s most used sentences. “Oh, I take mythology and history very seriously. And I really appreciate it! The other day I was reading about unicorns and how they’re considered a sacred animal in Chinese mythology, but how they look nothing like what we picture as unicorns. Turns out the idea of a horse with a horn is a lot more European than universal. Which I found fascinating.”

Turned out, Winn really liked to talk. It was perfect, because it meant that Rio didn’t have to worry as much about keeping a conversation going.  Plus, the more Winn talked the more Rio realized that��� he almost sounded a bit nervous at times. Which was, well, comforting to say the least. “I’m incredibly clumsy and my body rejects the outdoors, but other than that I’m very excited. I like hiking enough.” He hadn’t done it much admittedly, but it was definitely something that he was interested in doing. With the right people. He giggled at the comment about Blanche. Thankfully, Orion was very comfortable speaking to her now, surprising even himself. “I’m good with pretty much any music. I uh—I’m not really picky about anything. I’m not super crazy about, like, metal. Or Christian Rock, I guess.” The mention of food made Rio’s stomach growl on reflex. “I uh—well, I could definitely eat. Always. But I’m fine with waiting.”

“Hm,” Winn said. “Mostly just gettin’ to sleep, for me, rather than stayin’ awake and gettin’ lost in somethin’ or other.” Winn privately wondered if his transformation had thrown off his Circadian rhythm. The wolf wanted to be out at night, prowling, so, maybe, it would do anything to fight off its other half, to make Winn feel like he couldn’t sleep at night, that he should switch over entirely. But no. He was still, well, negligibly human. Had to live a human life. Not his fault that his inner wolf had taken all of his rebellion and ramped it up to eleven. “Rain helps, white noise. Stayed in Seattle for a couple’a weeks during undergrad? Best sleep I ever got.” Granted, part of that was Roberto keepin’ him exhausted. But, well, Orion didn’t need to know that much about what Winn got up to.

“And let’s be real, Odin prolly needed someone to teach ‘m magic. Shit, if magic were real—” Winn laughed privately “—I bet all those goddesses, like Hecate, Freya, Isis, whoever, would come down to show us what’s happenin’. I remember gettin’ jealous, like, when are dudes gonna get to sling around spells and potions and shit? Like, I’unno, Loki was sort of that. Though, guess they were a little more gender-fluid, so maybe not the right example.” He hummed thoughtfully. “Yeah, man, if the Greeks and Romans could see what Disney did to their myths, they’d be, like, super mad. “Go the Distance” is a bop, though, so the dead folks can suck it.” He watched as Orion’s face split into a (brilliant, frankly) smile at his offer of translating, and when he spoke, admittedly a little rough (but like would Winn be rude? naw), Mandarin. It was precious. Winn wondered why he didn’t smile more, it really changed his face. Not that Orion was ugly or nothin’, but there was something about enthusiasm, about pure joy, that really lit people up from the inside, gave their souls (or whatever) a chance to shine.

“Thank my father!” he said back, then in English to cover his bases. Winn listened to Orion talk about Chinese mythology, an area that he, oddly, didn’t know as much about. “My pa taught comparative literature, but I guess he had a pretty… Western trainin’? Or had mixed feelings ‘bout China. Never really found much. But that’s cool. I mean, unicorns are associated, in the West, with, like, purity, right? I can imagine Europeans focusin’ on a horn and associatin’ it with purity, if you catch my meanin’.” He wiggled his eyebrows, to make his intent even clearer. “But, naw, that’s really cool. I’m serious about the offer. Could help pass some of those sleepless nights, and I… miss it, I think.” Plus, like, who knew what elements from mythology were real. Orion might stumble upon somethin’ that Winn would actually run across. He wished, in that moment, he could show the other man. He seemed like the type to appreciate it, rather than run away screamin’.

“C’mon—” He fumbled, since he was pretty fast and loose with the nicknames. Didn’t want to offend Orion, but he felt like he’d heard Blanche call him somethin’ else a few times… “Rio. Just pick somethin’, bro. I got no judgment in my heart. Though, well, actually. Yeah. No Christian rock. This car’s been part of too many sins to not burst into flames. Don’t think either of us would love that.” Rio’s stomach growled, and Winn smirked. “I heard that. Like I said, don’t be shy about needin’ anythin’. We’ve got plenty of time and I like night drivin’ regardless. You prolly know this town better than me, so just pick somethin’ and we’ll head there after gettin’ Blanche.”

Speaking of. Winn picked up his cell, knowing they were coming up on Blanche’s house. He’d been almost taken aback the first time he’d visited her, post move. And then, like, hangin’ out when Blanche had been tailorin’ him for his date with Ricky. It was a big house and, like, Blanche—if her reaction to Winn’s own wealth was anythin’ to go by—seemed, uh, uncomfortable with money. To say the least. Blanche picked up on the fourth ring. “Winn,” she said, “Please tell me you aren’t at my house right now.

“Uh, pullin’ up in five. What’s up?” he asked.

“Winn! My shoulder is wack, you think I’m going to that? I’m at work!” Blanche said. Winn heard a loud rumble in the background. “Gotta go, have fun, bye!” Then, she hung up.

Well. Huh.

“Uh,” Winn said, intelligently, as he put his phone into one of the cup holders. “So, looks like Blanche isn’t joinin’ us on the trip. Forgot she hurt her shoulder, and I guess she forgot to tell me she wasn’t comin’? Just you ‘n me, Rio.” It’d be fiiine.

Conversations like this reminded Orion of how little he knew about Winn, which shouldn’t have been surprising considering the two hadn’t known each other long and didn’t spend much time talking to begin with. At least not about themselves. “That’s cool. I feel like you’ve… been a lot of places? Like travelling and stuff.” As much as Rio liked to think he knew about the history of the world, he had never actually seen any of it for himself. He had never even left Maine.

Orion remained pleasantly surprised by how much Winn knew and seemed interested in Norse mythology, but he was even more surprised by how much he was talking to keep up with the conversation. Maybe it was because the conversation was about history that Orion had turned so chatty. Of course, thinking about it seemed to make Orion a bit more nervous and he resigned himself to mostly nodding in agreement with Winn, chiming in to proclaim “God the Distance is a bop. All of Disney is.” He giggled about the unicorn, the phallic symbol of the horn never really occurring to Orion until Winn had mentioned it. “I- well I actually never thought of it that way. But yes, the symbolized peace or innocence. In Chinese cultures they look like sort of a chimera of other creatures. They’re considered one of the four noble animals of East Asia. It sort of symbolized virtues and it had all kinds of powers associated with it. So thanks, I will definitely take you up on it.

Orion procrastinated with choosing music just long enough for Winn to get on the phone with Blanche. His hearing picked up on the conversation and Orion felt his stomach drop. He was going to be alone? With Winn? Oh god. He was going to pass out. But it was too late to bail now… what excuse could he possibly come up with? “Oh.. right. Well, yeah that’s probably for the best. That she gets some rest.” He nodded, maybe a bit too long and had to force himself to stop nodding. Oh boy. “Um, welp let’s get going I guess!” He finally picked a song. It seemed easy enough to go based on a song that they had just agreed was a bop. So Hercules it was.

“I have,” Winn admitted. He’d alluded as much to Blanche, referenced being from the South in conversation often enough, that it was a fair observation. Winn always felt privileged, in some ways. Even before his trust vested, Dad and Ma had taken him over the country — and beyond. They always returned to Falls Church, but Winn knew he’d seen more of the world before his eighteenth birthday than some saw in their lives. “I always thought to myself, ‘The world’s a big place, there are places some folks never see. I wanna see ‘em all.’ Have you travelled much?” Winn got the sense… maybe not. It wasn’t just the clear interest in Rio’s eyes whenever he talked about the places he’d been, but that helped. “Where would you want to go? If you had your pick o’ the lot?”

He could hear Rio’s heartbeat skip a bit when he announced Blanche wouldn’t be joinin’ them, but Winn was used to it. Would Rio ever not be nervous around him? What was there to be nervous about? Winn hummed along to the melody line of “Go the Distance,” half-singing the end of the chorus when it came up. It was… unexpectedly a little emotional for Winn, but he didn’t need to unload his baggage on Rio. They barely knew each other, after all. “You, uh…” He coughed, hoping to hide the roughness in his voice. “Figure out dinner?” The song faded in the background, and into “I Won’t Say (I’m in Love)” smoothly.

Orion laughed. It was sarcastic, but not harsh. “No. No, I haven’t. I’ve never even been outside of Maine.” He was still laughing, mostly under his breath now. “There are so many places I’d want to go. I want to go to Massachusetts and eat Sonic, first thing.” He laughed again, realizing that without context it didn’t make much sense. “Uh— That’s a conversation I had with someone. I’ve never eaten there.” He shrugged. “But, uh, like a serious answer. God… so many options. I want to go to Egypt. And Rome. And Tokyo. And a bunch of other places.” Not that he thought he’d ever really get the chance.

Orion hummed along quietly to music as they drove along. “We can just swing by any fast food place and grab something on the way. I will eat anything.” He tapped his fingers against his knee along to the music. Winn had a good voice, and the desire to sing along with Disney was strong. But for the moment, his own nerves kept him from joining in outside of humming along to the muses' words. He cracked open the book he had been holding onto and absentmindedly stared at the words. “Sorry that Blanche couldn’t come along. I know I’m not really exciting company. Blanche is always fun.”

“Sonic does make a good burger to satisfy all your beastly cravings,” Winn said, laughing a little at his own joke. Beastly. Ha. Speaking of which… He turned the car away from the road to Blanche’s house, heading towards a burger place on their way out of White Crest. Darbussy would be Dar-pissy if they were late, and Winn knew Rio already was nervous around their professor, especially after that first day with all three of them in class together. “But, bro, we could swing down to Massachusetts on any weekend! Hell, if I didn’t think the teach would kill us, I’d take us there now. Could still camp out, even…” Winn got lost in his own daydream for a moment, humming lighty. “Never made it to Egypt, and the one time I was in Japan, I got food poisoning. Bad sushi.” Winn shuddered. “But Rome is… stunning. There’s really nothin’ like it. I’m not that good at appreciatin’ art or nothin’, but I could get lost in that city for days and never get bored. Why don’t you take a Study Abroad or somethin’? If money’s a problem…” Winn trailed off, shrugging. “Well, I mean, don’t let it be a problem,” he said cryptically.

They ordered quickly, Rio picking up a standard meal — his indulgence of choice being a chocolate milkshake. Winn ordered about three times as much food as he needed, figuring a lukewarm burger reheated on a campfire was still better than his sorry attempts at cooking. Plus, he got the vibe that Rio wouldn’t order as much as he wanted. Even more so when the younger man apologized for, well, for not bein’ Blanche. “Rio, man. Blanche is great. But you’re great, too. Your greatnesses are in their own vacuums. I like hangin’ with you, from what little I’ve gotten to do it.” He smiled, genuinely, poking Rio’s cheek with a fry. “I don’t hang with folks I don’t like. Don’t got much time for that shit. So, c’mon, lighten up. We’ll show B that she should’a come with us! I hope you’re ready for approximately a metric butt-ton of selfies, bro.” His eyes shone with laughter, and he turned the car again, trying to remember the way to the campsite. It was a left, right?

Winn was definitely trying his hardest to conversate with Orion. Rio knew that it wasn’t always easy. Talking to people, especially guys and especially especially attractive ones were not easy for Rio to connect or communicate with. In most cases, he usually found that it was easier to just… not communicate with them at all. But he supposed he didn’t have much of a choice here. “I can’t say the money would… exactly be the problem? It’s hard to explain.” Rather, he did not want to explain it. Especially with that obnoxious tingling feeling constantly ringing that kept reminding Rio that Winn was a werewolf and Rio was a Hunter.

“I don’t really do selfies…” Rio mumbled, but mostly to himself. When Winn asked about the turn, Rio couldn’t offer much assistance. “I have definitely never been here before. So, uh— you’re on your own.” They kept driving around for a while and the more they did, the more Rio was pretty sure that the campsite was nowhere around here. “So, uh— you sure that campsite was here?”

Winn decided to let sleeping dogs lie (ha), and not press Rio on the reasons he couldn’t travel to other places. Winn had been the kinda person, once, to go along with what other people wanted for him. Whether or not he still did, sometimes, was no one’s business but his own, but now, at least, he knew that he could make those decisions. Expectations be damned. His ears twitched a little when Rio mentioned that he didn’t do selfies. Winn was, slowly, learning more about Rio, and the first real thing he’d picked up on was the younger man’s near-criminal lack of self-confidence. And, while Winn couldn’t say he understood, per se, he’d been friends with enough folks with shit self-esteem to know when to press. Now, Winn knew, wasn’t the time.

“I’m not… not sure?” Winn said dubiously, pulling the car off to the side of the road for a moment and flipping his hazards on. Just in case someone drove past and decided to take pity on them. The sun had begun to set over the horizon the longer they’d driven, and now it was almost dark. His phone was little help, having lost signal a few miles back, but Winn was able, at least, to double-check the address. Winn hadn’t really noticed, content to let Rio read in the dim light provided by one of his overhead lights, but they’d driven for longer than he thought it’d be. He cracked a window and sniffed as subtly as possible, not smelling the salty brine of the ocean for once. Had they gone too far inland? He looked out his window, trying to get a sense for the terrain, of the soft dirt and the slow inclines and the— Oh, that scent. Slightly different, but familiar all the same.

“Think I drove us to the mountains, bro,” he said, softly. “Luckily, you can’t piss in Maine without hittin’ a campsite, so let’s keep driving for a minute. Park rangers might have a phone we can borrow, call, ugh, Darbussy and explain that we’re not skippin’ class. And then, like, have a fun, chill, bro weekend to ourselves, I guess? Head back in the morning, pretend it never happened, uh, ha, right, yeah.” He was rambling, he knew, but the last time he’d had a bit of a word vomit, Rio had noticeably calmed down. So, maybe his panic could prove some use. Winn flicked off the lights, flicked on his headlights, and continued down the road, a tight frown marring his usually sunny face.

Admittedly, Orion wasn’t heartbroken about missing the acting class field trip. Rio still wasn’t sure Darbussy even liked Rio. He could never get a read on her after he ran from the class that day. He couldn’t tell if she thought it had been part of his character or if he was skipping out on class. Either way, she hadn’t acknowledged him much outside of it. Maybe that was for the better though. Despite this, Rio was terrified at the idea of spending an entire night alone with Winn. Oh god. “Right. Yeah. I mean… hiking is fun! I like hiking and other stuff. I guess… let’s do it? Just pick a place.” Rio jumped out of the car as soon as Winn had parked and stretched out his muscles, staring up at the sky. The sun had not completely set yet, though the sun was beginning to creep towards the horizon. A few stars were already visible across the sky. “This place looks pretty. Want to hike up that mountain there and see if we can find a place to set up?” Hiking would pass the time and get them closer to the morning.

“You don’t sound too convinced,” Winn mumbled, huffing out a laugh under his breath. Didn’t want Rio to think he was makin’ fun of him or nothin’. Winn sniffed the air again. No signs of anythin’ that’d make their life uncomfortable for the night, even if they were more or less roughin’ it. He pulled out a map the park official had handed them on their way in and squinted at it for a moment before handing it to Rio. “Looks like there’s some trails out here, leadin’ up the mountain some. Don’t think y’want to be in one of the big areas, but looks like there’s some single-tent clearings? So long as we can see the stars, I’m a happy camper.” Ha. He popped the trunk, slinging his bag out and onto this back, along with the tent he’d brought along in a rare moment of forethought. Darbussy hadn’t made it clear whether or not they’d be goin’ with a cabin or what. He started walking, letting Rio set the pace. “We might both be up late, given what you said earlier, but you’ve got a sleepin’ bag or somethin’? I run hot, so I don’t mind you usin’ mine, if you need it.” The winter chill hadn’t entirely left the air, but Winn would be comfortable down to a certain point. The thick scent of pine entranced his senses, reminding him, simultaneously, of home and of something new. Hiking always had that appeal to him — of nostalgia and discovery workin’ in tandem. “Soooooooooooo,” he drawled, trying to let Rio pick a topic of conversation. He’d never been great with silence, unless he was in a session. But he was still figurin’ Rio out. Best to encourage any openin’ up the younger man wanted to do.

The two worked to unpack their things from the back and then set off on a trail that Orion assumed would lead up to the clearing that Winn had pointed again. Given that they had already gotten lost once, Rio wasn’t entirely convinced they would end up where they were supposed to go. But as long as they knew how to get back to the car in the morning, he supposed it didn’t matter much. “Have you seen my clothes?” Rio attempted humor, holding his arms out and spinning around, the baggy hoodie swinging out widely in response. “I’m basically always wearing a sleeping bag.” It wasn’t that the cold didn’t bother him, Rio found himself cold quite often during the winter. It was more that he wore layers of clothes all the time that helped keep him warm. “My family used to go hiking sometimes.” He wasn’t sure where he was going with this, but as he looked up at the sky as things began getting darker and the stars got brighter and brighter, sparkling across the sky and lighting the path for them. Not that either of them needed it, honestly. Rio had no issues seeing at night, and the constant tingling feeling was proof enough that Winn didn’t either. “They’re all super active. Big into competition. Hiking became more of a like… sport. It was all about the race. Some big competition to get to the end of the trail first. I never really got the chance to appreciate all the views.” But that wasn’t exactly a stellar conversation. “You uh- you must like the woods right?” Jesus Christ. Rio facepalmed himself silently and rubbed at his temples. What kind of stupid question was that? “I mean uh- that’s what dudes do right? They like the outdoors and stuff? Or something?”

“Adorable,” Winn said, deadpan, as Rio spun around in the setting sun. It was, but Winn figured as much distance between the truth as possible was likely warranted. “But forreal, if you need the bag, take it. Hell, we can just unzip it and use it as a blanket. Tent’s a little snug, as it is, since it was mostly my backup plan.” He hadn’t planned on sharing it with anyone, but Rio was fairly small. They could make it work. If Rio didn’t want to be as far away as possible, that was. “Same, actually. Well, not the competition thing. My gran’pa, my mom’s dad, was a coal miner, so we went into the mountains pretty often to see ‘m. I spent a lot of nights, when I was young, listenin’ to the crickets ‘n frogs, watching the stars and tryin’ to catch a new one formin’. Ambitious little asshole, in that regard.” He laughed, mostly to himself. “Doesn’t seem like your all that competitive, no ‘ffense, really. Think I like you just the way you are.” He whistled for a moment, content with the walking, taking a long drink of water while Rio rambled slightly. He cut the younger man off with a gentle: “I do. ‘S in the name, right?” He laughed again, louder, at a joke that Rio couldn’t possibly pick up on. “I’ve always felt a little more at-home in the woods, honestly. I like the city, I do, but there’s somethin’ out here that feels more… real? Present? But naw, not every dude has to want to go white water raftin’ to be a load of fun. Way I see it, we should all get to choose our own paths, our own things we like to do. Who cares ‘bout what dudes should wanna do? If y’want to be a mountain man? More power to ya. But there’re lots of things that folks who keep themselves in boxes miss out on.” He paused, looking up at the sky and considering his next words as carefully as possible. “Don’t know if I would’a ever kissed a guy, if I hadn’t shoved myself outta the ol’ box. And even then, I still got so stuck in it, for so long.” There was something wistful to Winn’s voice, a precarious sort of melancholy that seemed like it could tip over into mournful at a moment’s notice. And yet, he smiled.

Orion had to turn away from Winn to hide the red in his face. He had instantly blushed at Winn’s compliment, but didn’t need that embarrassment on top of all the other things today. He was pretty sure he didn’t have a crush on Winn. At least, it didn’t feel the same way it had with other guys Rio had previously had a crush on. But Winn was still a hot guy complimenting him so… yikes. “No offense taken. I’m not competitive at all. I don’t really care about winning.” That had to be a good thing, considering he spent so much time losing. Wouldn’t have been good for his psyche if he was a sore loser on top of being bad at things. “I get that. I used to think I wanted to be one of those people. The like… outdoorsy woodsy type.” Rio sighed, maybe he still did. He couldn’t tell anymore. “But I’m kinda comfortable with being a nerd, honestly. I like reading from the comfort of my own home.” Winn’s words about kissing a guy struck a weird, sympathetic chord in Rio. He didn’t even know that kissing dudes was something that Winn did on like… a regular basis. He had still been half-convinced that the kiss in theater class had been some kind of joke on the new student clearly flustered by the attractive actor. So, hearing Winn say the words made Rio feel… weird. “Maybe someday I’ll fall out of my box too?” Knowing Rio, it would probably be face first. “You seem to have a pretty good handle on yourself though. Like… who you are as a person?”

“I know exactly who I am,” Winn said, chipper and confident. “But it wasn’t an immediate thing or nothin’. Took work.” What was that old phrase? Anythin’ worth doin’ was worth doin’ well? Winn didn’t regret the time it had taken him to step out of his parents’ expectations, to become more of the person he was today. But he wouldn’t lie to Rio either; it had been rough. There had been some dark moments. But, speakin’ of the dark… The sun had set fully now, the stars darting the sky. Winn paused, whistling low as he looked skyward. “Beautiful.” He scanned the line of the sky for Boötes, having picked up a little star-gazing from his nights under the moon. Okay, now, Ursa Major should be… He glanced further to the right, stopping midway to Ursa Major and squinted, thanking his werewolf senses for the ability to really gaze at the beauty of the dimmer stars. “There,” he said, pointing. “Canes Venatici. Or, the hunting dogs, probably of Boötes. But they’re a little hard to see, so…” He traced his finger, farther and farther over until he found it: “There you are,” he said, smiling. “Or, Orion anyway. But I’m sure you knew that. Behind him, though, there’s the real dog star. Sirius, with Canis Major. Any earlier, and it would’ve been under the treeline, I think. We got real lucky. A Hunter and his loyal dog. Or… dogs, anyway. Canis Minor is… somewhere around here.”

“I’m glad you do.” Orion trailed behind Winn, watching him as he walked. It certainly did seem that way, didn’t it? Winn seemed so sure of himself. He talked to people like he had known them his whole life. He walked with a sort of confidence that Rio could only hope to achieve. And he talked about himself with no hesitation in his voice. In Rio’s eyes, it couldn’t just be an act. Nobody was that good at faking it, right? If so, how did Rio learn how to do it? “Everytime I think I do, something comes along and shakes my world.” Rio stopped hiking and stood by Winn, happy to let him point out constellations along the sky. Though Rio didn’t know exactly where to spot a lot of them, he was familiar with the names. “The stories about Orion are all so different that it’s sometimes easy to forget that almost all of them involved his hunting dogs.” How ironic, the Hunter aided by a beast. “It’s said that people in the Nile used Sirius to signal the flood of the Nile River. It symbolized the Sun God Osiris rising from the dead.” He continued staring up at the sky, getting lost in the stars as the cool breeze provided a break in the silence. But eventually the wind was enough to make Rio shiver from the cold, and he broke from the haze. “Come on. I think we’re probably getting close.” For show, Rio flicked on a flashlight. It didn’t affect his vision much, but he was supposed to be a human. The two continued towards the camp, quieter for the final parts of the trip. Finally, the two found the clearing in the trees and Rio happily discarded the bags he had been carrying, dropping them on the ground in a pile and stretching out his arms to relax the strain in his muscles. “Wooh. That was exhausting. We made it!”

“Exhausting, but fun!” Winn chimed in, shrugging the tent off of his back and into a pile with his bag. “C’mon, help me set this up, bro.” If Winn was bein’ honest, it had been a minute since he’d slept in a tent proper. He was, more often than not, content to find a soft patch of ground, let the wolf come out, and keep his ear out for any threats. That long year he’d spent in the mountains, he’d gotten used to it, and, sometimes, he wondered if that wasn’t part of his insomnia. Tonight, he hadn’t brought any aram with him, not wantin’ Rio to get into it (or worse, ask questions), so he was prepared to lay awake, stuck with his thoughts for company. Given enough time, he’d reorganize the entire team six different ways before settlin’ back on their current arrangement. The work went quick, despite Rio claimin’ he wasn’t much of an outdoorsman, and Winn glanced over at the storage container, undoing the heavy latch and sliding it open. “Grab some snacks and we’ll throw the rest in here. Don’t want a bear comin’ after us.” Not that a bear would be a huge inconvenience. It had been… a minute, since Winn had fought one off, but he could still do it. Probably.

No sooner than he’d said the word bear, there was a soft rustle in the bushes. Winn stifled a growl, wolf already on alert. “Aw, fuck. Stay back, Orion.” There was a long stick, left near the firepit, and Winn crouched down to grab it. His eyes trained on the spot where he’d heard the noise, and he used the stick to push back the brush. “Oh, what the fuck,” he said, recoiling back as the creature approached him, snarling. Its tentacles moved slowly, whipping at leaves, and its canine skull was, near as Winn could tell, poking through the remains of its skin. He dropped the stick immediately, kicking off his boots behind him and pulling off his shirt. Then, he remembered. Rio. Shit. He could feel the change coming, his claws and fangs eager to tear through in the moonlight… and he wasn’t sure he could stop it.

Orion didn’t mind helping Winn set up the camp. He didn’t know what he was doing really, but the tent wasn’t that complicated. Plus, Rio was really looking forward to finishing up with everything so he could finally relax and lay back.

Of course, the noises out in the woods would ruin that plan. Rio heard the rustling bushes, immediately tensing up. If Rio had been logical, he would have assumed it was a rabbit or deer or something else completely normal to be out in the woods. But because Rio was paranoid and terrified of basically everything, his immediate thought was some kind of killer monster that wanted to kill them. Or worse, a werewolf Hunter. Or worse-worse, his parents. Rio didn’t waste any time jumping behind Winn as they faced the potential threat. Rio was pretty sure Winn would be more useful in a fight against whatever came out of the woods anyways. But thank god for both of them, the creatures that came out from the woods were practically harmless. Rio breathed a sigh of relief. He had never actually seen a Yeth Hound in person, and had to admit that they certainly looked terrifying. But despite the horrifying appearance and Rio’s typical attitude of being scared of practically anything that moved towards him too quickly, he couldn’t have any other reaction besides excitement towards the creatures.

Unfortunately, it didn’t seem like Winn had the same amount of information as Rio did. He discarded the stick and began kicking his boots off before ditching the shirt as well. Rio immediately blushed, knowing this wasn’t the time to think about that, but suddenly very interested in looking at anything other than Winn’s chest. Rio grabbed onto Winn’s arm, “Hey, don’t—” he started, but it looked like the transformation had already begun. Rio could see the claws extending and Winn was shaking against Rio’s hand. And he was strong. “Winn!” Rio tried again, louder this time. He ignored the sinking feeling in his stomach as he wrapped his other arm around Winn’s stomach and planted his feet into the ground, putting a bit more Hunter strength into it this time as he tried to hold Winn back. “They’re not going to hurt us! I promise. They’re called Yeth Hounds and they’re harmless!”

Every transformation was different, every time the wolf was let out had the potential to go wrong. There would always be a part of Winn worried that this time would be the time that the wolf really went wild, tearing apart everything in its path. Like he’d expected, Winn wasn’t able to stop himself from transforming, once he began. It was still too close to the Full Moon, he was still too amped up from his encounter with the asanbosam. But he heard what Rio was saying, as the younger man tried to hold him back. In his wolf form, Winn was just bigger, and he felt, as his bones twisted and reformed, as the wooly fur spread across his skin, Rio being pulled up and onto his back, until the younger man was gripping at his coat. Winn growled softly, unsure how Rio, who had claimed he was no outdoorsman, had been strong enough to hold him back from leaping forward. There were a few answers, none which Winn liked.

The Yeth Hound approached them, and Winn crouched down, mock-bowing to the other canine. If Rio said that the Hound was harmless, Winn believed him… He crouched, to allow Rio to hop off of his back, if the other man wanted to, before sitting back on his hind paws, sniffing curiously at the Hound. The smell wasn’t quite as… dead, as he would’ve thought and, like Rio had indicated, Winn didn’t sense any malice from the other creature. Juliet had been dubious, given her normal quarry was (dangerous) werewolves, on other species and how dangerous, or not dangerous, they were, but, as Hunters were wont to do, had recommended Winn assume they were all dangerous. Of course she would say that, even as generally on the side of angels that Jules would. Hunters were indoctrinated in their ways, even the ones that were less stabby. Winn had been too eager to believe it, too, that other creatures might be a threat to him, to the safety of humans. But… Well, he wasn’t human. Not anymore. He couldn’t believe shit that black-and-white. It was a lot to think about… too much to think about when Winn was a giant wolf-man.

He whined curiously, nudging Rio’s back with his head, not wanting to change back (on the off-chance Rio was mistaken), but wanting an explanation as to what Rio knew about the creature. ‘Course, there was only so much he could communicate in this form. But, well, Rio clearly knew something, and far be it from Winn to not let the younger man talk. He stretched, languidly, setting one paw just in front of Rio, ready to protect, if given a reason.

Orion wished that he could have been more graceful while climbing off of wolf Winn’s back. Unfortunately, he was far too awkward to pull anything that cool off. He mostly slipped off, trying to hop to regain his foot once he landed but instead he twisted his ankle and crumbled to the ground and just barely caught himself at the last minute. He sighed at himself and shook it off, focusing instead on the exchange between Winn, now fully in wolf form, and the yeth hound. The whole thing was pretty incredible. Despite reading the books and being attacked by one, Rio had never actually seen a transformation in its entirety. It was… remarkable. And a bit scary.

Before leaving, the Yeth hound glanced over at Rio. Of course, despite everything indicating that this should be another creature that Rio was irrationally afraid of, the only thing Rio wanted was to reach out and pet the dog. But he knew better. Yeth hounds trailed behind humans, following them around from the shadows. They didn’t want that physical interaction with a human. Rio was respectful enough to acknowledge that. The creature, content with the two apparently, scurried back off into the woods. Rio was still shaking from the excitement of seeing one in person.

But that left him alone with Winn. And not just Winn, but Winn in wolf form. He supposed that a conversation needed to be had at some point now. “I’ve always wanted to see a Yeth hound. Since I was a little kid.” Rio detoured, staring at the spot in the bushes it had originally emerged from. “My sister never really understood it. I was so scared of everything and yet all I wanted was to have one as a pet. Crazy right?” Rio laughed. Partly from the irony of his story and also because he was currently talking to a werewolf. A full on werewolf. “But uh- they’re harmless creatures really. They like the scares. But they wouldn’t actually harm anyone.” He didn’t know what Winn was thinking at this moment. Had he already connected the dots? Was he still trying to figure out why Rio wasn’t freaking out over the werewolf thing? Sometimes Rio wished that he could read minds. But instead all he could do was fall back against a tree, sliding down it until he was sitting on the ground and staring at the werewolf. “This is so cool. Holy crap.”

There were moments when there was nothing more than the wolf wanted to do than wag its tail. Encountering another wolf was usually the typical scenario. Despite Winn’s reservations about other wolves, his furrier half didn’t care. This time, however, his tail wagged at the human (?) in front of him, talking adoringly about the mons— creature that had just appeared before them. Winn tried his best to communicate his approval with a huff of air that could be mistaken for a laugh. The best thing, Winn figured, about being a wolf-man was that he could be expressive, marginally. Rio did seem scared of him, nor was he going in for the stabbing. So, Winn did what any curious animal would do and approached Rio, sniffing the younger man. Nothing on him… or, well, at least not wolfsbane or something equally bad. And then — partly because he figured it would be funny, partly because he got the sense Rio maybe knew that Winn was a werewolf before now, and partly because caving into his baser instincts was, sometimes, just rad — Winn licked the side of Rio’s face.

He bowed his head into Rio’s personal space — look, everyone wanted to touch the fur, Winn had wanted to touch the fur before he’d been turned — allowing the man to poke and prod at him if so chose. Then, because he’d have to turn back eventually, Winn sniffed at the perimeter, stalking around the clearing for any signs of bears, moose, or the like. His human form hadn’t sensed anything, but, well, then he’d found the yeth hound. So, clearly, another look around was in order. And, oh. There was an idea. Rio had said it was cool to see Winn in this form and, short of riding him around the woods, there was one more thing werewolves were pretty famous for. He reared back on his hind legs, coming up to stand tall, inhaled deep and howled at the still-mostly-full moon in the sky. It wasn’t a mournful howl, or an angry howl, but a howl of pure pleasure at being allowed to run free.

But all things had to come to an end eventually and, after another gentle head-butt to Rio’s chest for good measure (and… well… maybe some pets), Winn dipped just outside of the clearing, behind the tent, and shifted back to his human form. ‘Course, that left a naked Winn Woods standin’ behind their tent and, while Winn didn’t have any shame to speak of, he figured he should ask before flashing Rio. “Bro,” he started, “if you could go in my bag and pull out a spare pair of shorts, that would be, like, so great.” He wiggled his eyebrows at the younger man because, well, why not?

Orion still hadn’t quite wrapped his head around the fact that the wolf in front of him was Winn. Moments ago, he had been a human, setting up camp with Rio. Now he was… well, a wolf. Rio had known about werewolves his entire life, studied them and memorized everything he could about the species. Yet, this moment was still more informative than anything he could ever see in a book. He knew a werewolf. In real life, knew one. Winn sniffed at Rio and eventually licked his face. Rio laughed and backed away nervously, wiping at his face. Was it weird to accept licks from someone he knew was a human? Where did the rules stand with werewolves? He knew where his family stood on the issue, obviously.

Eventually, Winn took off, and Rio decided not to follow. Opting to hang back and observe instead. He seemed… happy? He couldn’t be sure, but Winn seemed to enjoy being in this form, out in the wild. Rio had always seen werewolves as strictly human, the wolf form being something that they only used when necessary or when forced by a full moon. It had never occurred to him that some may like or maybe even prefer the wolf form. And then Winn did what Rio had always wanted to see, he howled. Against the Hunter’s hearing, it was unbearably loud. But despite flinching and squeezing his ears shut between the palms of his hands, Rio was smiling the entire time.

Winn came back over to Rio once more and nudged against him. Unsure what else to do, Rio tapped his hand against the wolves head. Was that what Winn had wanted? Was petting something that he… enjoyed? It was an entirely new world for Rio. He had no idea what to do or expect. His heart raced a mile a minute. And it only got worse once the wolf disappeared behind the trees and he suddenly heard Winn’s voice again. Shorts? Oh god. He turned beat red immediately, frantically leaping for the bag and grabbing out shorts, closing his eyes and covering them with his hand for an extra precaution. He stumbled through the woods, tripping over branches and dips and flat out falling at least once. But eventually he made his way to Winn’s voice and held the shorts out, waving them wildly until Winn grabbed a hold of them. “Sorry, uh— Wow. That was… so cool. And crazy. But cool. And did you see those Yeth hounds? Incredible. They look like something straight out of a Goosebumps story. So creepy.”

Winn winced as Rio tripped and stumbled his way through the brush, eyes closed, hand clamped. Not that he was one to go around assignin’ sexuality or anythin’, but… If a higher power hadn’t made this dude gay, they’d sure made him confusing. Not for the first time, Winn wondered if he’d accidentally stolen Rio’s first kiss. Which… oops. He slipped on his shorts, tapping Rio on the shoulder when he was mostly-clothed again, sidling around the backside of the tent to look for his thrown shirt. “Hmm,” Winn said, intelligently. It… Well, honestly? Rio was right. It had been cool, even if Winn had almost gone toe-to-toe with somethin’ harmless just ‘cause it looked weird. “Yeth hounds.” The words felt odd in his mouth, but, then, what new supernatural thing hadn’t sounded weird. Hell, even the word “ghost” was loaded, nowadays, full of things he didn’t know.

But… There was the lingering question, in the back of his mind, somethin’ he needed to clear up before he got too attached to his new friend — even if that friend hadn’t tried to kill him, had looked delighted to see a werewolf up close (and, thank fuck, the wolf had played nice today). “So… Didn’t seem too surprised to see me get all, y’know, furry. Knew a bunch about the hounds, too. Now, you didn’t knife me the second I turned, and you seem pretty chill — and, like, I have friends who do the…” He trailed off. Rio deserved a firm question, more than his rambling. “Are you a Hunter, Orion?” There. It was out there, and Rio could deny it, but… Well, like, he had the feelin’ this dude was bad at lyin’. “No judgment,” he added, as an afterthought. Just because Rio had known, probably, what Winn was, didn’t mean he was obligated to tell Winn everything about himself, so, before he could answer, Winn barked out a laugh.

“My name is Winn, and I’m a werewolf.”

It couldn’t be avoided, Orion supposed. He had used the Hunter strength. He certainly hadn’t meant to. But it was too late now. The last thing that Rio wanted to do was expose himself as a Hunter to Winn. He didn’t want to be hated. He liked Winn, enjoyed hanging out with him. Honestly, he wasn’t even sure why Winn liked him back. “No— I’m not.” Rio began, sure that he wanted to be honest. “I mean, yes. Technically speaking. I don’t really like to acknowledge that though.” He was nervous, scratching at the back of his neck. He didn’t know how to explain this away. If Rio had been a werewolf, alone on a mountain with a Hunter, he probably wouldn’t take it very well. “But I’m not a Hunter. I don’t… hunt. Anything. And I definitely don’t want to be known for that.”

Rio laughed at Winn’s joke, rolling his eyes and stepping away and towards the tent. “I’m not saying I’m a Hunter, just fyi. But uh—very funny!” He climbed inside the tent. It wasn’t big, but it would be fine for the night. Especially after Rio stacked six pounds of pillows and blankets between the two of them. The last thing Rio needed was thrashing around and touching Winn during the night. Nope. No thanks. If there weren’t enough pillows or blankets he would figure something else out. Like their bags, or branches. Whatever it took.

Once he had divided everything in the tent, Rio finally settled in. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad? Winn knew about Rio being a Hunter and he hadn’t yelled at him, left him or killed him. That was insane. “Okay well… don’t kill me in my sleep tonight, please. I promise I don’t care that you’re a werewolf. Actually, I think it’s insanely cool. But I think I’m going to bed?” Rio didn’t really do sleepovers or the like. He wasn’t sure if he was going to be able to sleep tonight. But he could pretend to be. “So, uh— I guess we go to sleep now? This is so awkward, oh god. Uh… night?” Oh boy. This was going to be a long night.

[woofools]

Because of (in spite of?) the weird messages I’ve been getting recently I’ve  been thinking about this nonsense post almost nonstop, and now I have Thoughts about Yin and Yang’s parentage. Compiling those Thoughts here in hopes that it’ll break the curse and I’ll be able to think of other things again.

(Fair warning, this is basically me putting an assortment of thoughts in a blender and serving the resulting concoction on ice. Don’t expect anything eloquent below the cut.)

So, okay. To think/talk about the notion proposed in the previous post, we’d need to address the concept of Yo being Yin and Yang’s biological father. I’ve seen multiple people talk about this twist derisively, if not with outright disgust. Which considering how small the fandom actually is, leads me to assume this opinion is the majority. 

I was also kinda of this mindset (or at least that it was lazy writing), but actually stopping to think about it made me realize I might be okay with it? Don’t get me wrong, there are some very legitimate critiques for this, most egregiously that it came out of absolutely nowhere at the last minute. This was honestly my biggest complaint with the situation until I realized... That’s kind of the whole show? 

In Attack of the Lesson, they defeat the eponymous jerk with a, quote, exercise and vegetable-powered robot. This has never been referenced before, and is never mentioned again. When Yang asks where they acquired this monstrosity, we get a cut explaining that Yo won it in a poker game. And that’s all we get. Humor that comes out of nowhere at the last second is Yin Yang Yo!’s whole schtick. I almost suspect there would be less contention towards the twist if it had been given proper gravitas and not played for comedy at all, but of course there’s not really a way I could test that. In any case, though the execution was a bit clumsy, I can’t really be mad at the show doing what it’s always done.

Next biggest thing (courtesy of @yuckisalesbian, who brings up a very good point), is that Yo being the twins’ father eliminates the “found family” dynamic of their relationship. But all things considered... does it?

I mean yes. On the surface, having the adult the twins bonded with and came to love actually be their dad does almost feel like the show’s trying to imply some sort of “they can be happy now because they’ve found their real family!” esoteric happy ending bullshit. Except the show also goes out of its way to portray how blood-related, “real” families can be incredibly toxic, and not always the ideal (Carl and his mom, Saranoia and her dad and brother, etc.). Plus, the show acknowledges the importance of Found Families at the end when Yin talks about how the Woo Foo Army is their family too. “Not genetically, but we didn’t know Master Yo was our father, and we were sort of a family already. What’s the difference as long as you’re there for each other?” Heck, if anything that line’s a direct nod at this trope. Further helped that the show even goes so far as to sort of make fun of itself for the “twist,” having the rest of the kids complain that “Master Yo lets Yin and Yang fight, and he’s their parent!” “...somehow.”

It all depends on tolerance levels and interpretation, of course, but I personally can’t take too much issue on this front. Just because they literally found their family doesn’t negate the fact that the three are also a Found Family, y’know?

I’ve also seen a few people talk about how it’s “gross” for Yo, who’s over 100, to have fathered two 11-year-olds because of the implication that their mother would’ve had to have been vastly younger in order to bear children. But eh, maybe it’s because there’s a considerable age-gap between my mom and step-dad, but the concept of age-gaps in relationships don’t bother me. I mean provided we’re not talking things involving minors. I assume that should go without saying, but y’know. Also, c’mon. Yo might not always be the most upstanding guy but he’s not a creep. Let’s think about the character we’re talking about here. 

Further food for thought, Edna, who’s not only canonically referred to as an “old woman” but actually dated Yo, did - as far as we're told - give birth to Carl, who physically cannot be that much older than Yin and Yang. So depending on the virility/species of whoever the twins’ mom was, there might not even have been all that much of an age-gap to begin with.

Which segues to...!

The Night Master being the one to give birth to Yin and Yang was um. Yeah, honestly that was just something random that struck me as I answered the ask. I hadn’t thought it would stick with me as much as it did. 

(Yeah. A theory that both justifies my preferred ship and allots some intriguing character interpretation of my fave, and I didn’t expect to consider it more. I’ll take my Boo Boo the Fool jester cap now, thanks.)

But since it did stick with me, I realized that NM being the twin’s other parent (and consequently being trans) actually fits in with what we know of the whole situation rather neatly? Like I’m not going to sit here and be like “GUYS I’VE DONE IT, I’VE CRACKED THE CODE,” because obviously not. There is no way in  H E L L  the runners of this show would have ever allowed any kind of lgbtq+ representation during the time it was airing. But regardless, there’s still just enough info/a lack of info for me to have some headcanons that fill the space nicely.

In the flashback that shows Yo learning he’s the twins’ dad, he’s first seen sitting in a hospital waiting room. Yet when Ti and Chai (ohhhh god does the anachronism of them being there make my soul hurt) specifically reference them as Yo’s children, he’s shocked. What was he supposed to be doing sitting in a waiting room if he didn’t explicitly know that his children were being born at that moment? I would like to posit for the board’s consideration that he’d gotten a message from someone telling him to meet them at the hospital, and the thought of kids never crossed his mind because that someone was also incredibly old.

I’ve mentioned on here that, against all odds and common sense, the Night Master never seems to capitalize on the opportunities he has to actually kill Yin and Yang, and instead makes a point to force them to join him. Not to beat a dead horse or anything but in Pros and Cons he doesn’t kill Yin and Yang (despite having them cornered and outnumbered) on the grounds that a. Yo might go on to train more competent students if he loses the two he has (dude you were literally on the precipice of unleashing your master plan; he wouldn’t have had time), and b. Quote, “Unless the panda is there to see you perish, this is not how it ends.” AND YET, the next time he has Yin and Yang at his mercy, Yo IS there, and all he does is... put them in cages. We saw Yo getting brief flashes of the fight he’d had with NM before he’d gotten his memory wiped in Return of the Night Master, all of which was triggered by familiar imagery. It’s not too far of a stretch that NM could’ve had similar flashes to Yin and Yang’s birth when dealing with them, and so he subconsciously held back when it came to actually hurting them.

How fucking appropriate would it be for Yin and Yang, the kids named the symbol of dualism, to have parents that acted as the respective forerunners for good and evil?

Going back to Return of the Night Master, Yang at one point yells “Surrender fools!” It’s a direct callback to what NM said to Yo preceding the fight where his army was turned to stone, and the thing that finally makes Yo remember that particular fight. Now if I were a writer, I would absolutely wet myself at the opportunity to use that as early foreshadowing, just saying. Also, considering we never actually see NM use this phrase around Yin and Yang, I think it’s weirdly cute to think of this as a tiny something the twins might have inherited from him. Demanding their foes just give up in the face of their superior skills, I mean.

Speaking of cute, NM training the twins in martial ball would mark the first time he would’ve ever gotten to bond with his kids. Which, I know it was initially meant a manipulative ploy, but again: After this instance he never actually tries to directly to hurt Yin or Yang outside that final battle, and even then he seemed more focused on Yo. Compare to a few episodes prior, where he sent Zarnot to blow up the dojo. So I like to imagine he appreciated the experience, if only on a level he refuses to acknowledge.

I’m kind of destroyed by the idea that the guy who frequently makes use of an artifact that erases people’s minds would end up on the receiving end of a memory wipe, and losing the only things he might’ve had the potential to genuinely love just for the sake of loving them. So naturally I’m drawn to this.

Also some extra Trans headcanons because we all deserve it:

We never learn the Night Master’s name, despite “the Night Master” being revealed to be a title shared by several people. Why? His actual name is his dead name. And because he’s dramatic af he decided not to bother with a name at all, and instead embraced the Night Master persona entirely.

He seems to really favor the Amnesulet, using it several times over the course of his appearances. To the point that even after he’s deposed, it’s still distinctly referenced as something he used, and coveted by the other villains. How easy would it be for him to use it to erase people’s memories of his time as a female? Might explain why he favors it as much as he does, at any rate.

Final thought that has nothing to do with anything in show it’s just a headcanon I find cool: A few years ago I read somewhere that NM was supposed to be a mix of a bat and a Chinese dragon (I can’t remember where, I think maybe wikipedia? anyway). I thought that was cool, probably inaccurate, but still rad. Looking back on it with this stuff in mind, I find it incredibly interesting how Chinese dragons are practically always depicted with long whisker-like things on their snouts. I’m suddenly very attracted to the idea that this is a trait shared by all dragons of this sort in the YYY universe, regardless of gender, which NM inherited despite looking primarily like a(n admittedly very long) bat. It was the one thing about his appearance that he liked before transitioning. People would try to make fun of him for “looking like a guy,” but jokes on them because his quiet joy at being told such was one of the first big “hey wait” moments he had before realizing he actually was a guy.

[vxllainoxs]

‟ ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴏɴᴇ ᴡʜᴏ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ɢᴇᴛ ᴜᴘ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏʀɴɪɴɢ, ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴄᴏꜰꜰᴇᴇ, ᴄʜᴏᴏꜱᴇ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴡᴇᴀʀ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇɴ ɢᴏ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ᴄᴏʟᴅ-ʙʟᴏᴏᴅᴇᴅʟʏ ᴘᴜᴛ ᴀ ᴛᴏᴛᴀʟ ꜱᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇʀ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜ. ᴅɪᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ꜱᴏᴍᴇ ᴋɪɴᴅ ᴏꜰ ᴀɴᴏᴍᴀʟᴏᴜꜱ, ᴘꜱʏᴄʜᴏᴘᴀᴛʜɪᴄ ꜰʀᴇᴀᴋ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ᴛʜᴀᴛ? ᴅɪᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ʙᴏʀɴ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴀʏ? ᴏʀ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴀɴʏ ᴡᴏᴍᴀɴ, ᴄᴏʀʀᴇᴄᴛʟʏ ᴘʀᴏɢʀᴀᴍᴍᴇᴅ, ʙᴇ ᴛᴜʀɴᴇᴅ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴀ ᴘʀᴏꜰᴇꜱꜱɪᴏɴᴀʟ ᴇxᴇᴄᴜᴛɪᴏɴᴇʀ? ” 

(  shay mitchell.  27.  she/her.  )   everything’s fine,  OKSANA “VILLANELLE” ASTANKOVA,  you’re in the good place!  do you remember your last days in  KILLING EVE? but don’t worry, your  ( sleek pantsuits for every occasion, a thick russian accent dripping from blunt remarks, a misplaced, childish glint lingering within ice cold eyes, an undeniable and magnetic pull towards a foe, crimson red blood caked within perfectly manicured fingernails. )  will fit perfectly with the rest of the good place, so long as you commit to the  THE FRIGID FEMME FETALE  despite your tendency to commit to  ( impulsiveness )  that the architect of the good place said you were. it’ll just be like a fun acting exercise! just play along and everything will continue to be fun. 

hi hi !! ellie here , and i’m way too psyched to have the opportunity to babble all about my precious baby assassin . i must warn in advance that some parts of the introduction may contain : mentions of violence , death , blood / gore . however , i’ll absolutely try to keep it from being too vivid . if you’re interested in plotting with miss villanelle ( she only bites a solid 80% of the time ) , feel free to reach out to me here or on discord ! ladies and gents , buckle up because this is gonna be a l o n g ride . 

b a s i c s . 

- full name : Оксана Анатольевна Астанкова ( oksana anatoljevna astankova )   call her anything but villanelle and she will stomp on your foot, though.

- alias : villanelle. 

- age : twenty - seven. 

- orientation: chaotic lesbian. 

- place of origin : russia ; specifics beyond that are unknown. 

- fandom : killing eve ( won’t be basing her off of the “codename: villanelle” novels ). 

b a c k g r o u n d . ( did i go overboard ? you bet ! )

- not much is known about villanelle’s childhood; oksana was born somewhere in russia. however, she spent her life as an orphan, never knowing who her parents were and drifting through the system. for the most part, she went through her years relatively unbothered by this. for reasons that are unknown, she refuses to speak her native russian, however, and refuses to be referred to by her birth name, suggesting that she doesn’t embrace her past. 

- from a young age, she showed intellect beyond compare and was considered a gifted student. she held an affinity for learning languages, her favorite of which was french, and was considered the top of her class. her brains, however, did little to cancel out her unnerving personality and her increasingly violent tendencies. 

- somewhere along the line, oksana developed an intense bout of admiration bordering on obsession for a teacher of hers named anna aanmokoba. the woman took her underneath her wing and fostered her growth as a student, something oksana mistook for love and passion. because of this, she would gift anna expensive perfumes, designer clothing, and write her love letters in french, feeding off of the attention she was showered in. anna, however, claimed that the only reason she paid special attention to oksana was because everybody else feared her too much to be around her. 

- oksana eventually grew to firmly believe that anna’s husband was the one preventing them from ever being together. one day, when anna returned home from work, she found balloons and a cake in her apartment, like there was a special occasion worth celebrating. upon further inspection, she also found her husband -- dead. oksana had murdered him in cold blood and, like a giddy child, took great pride in what she had done, viewing it as simply removing an obstacle that stood in her way. 

- after the murder, she was shipped off to a prison, where she spent five years. throughout those five years, she never stopped writing to anna, however, one day, the letters simply stopped and oksana’s belongings had been shipped to anna’s apartment, leading her to believe that she had died in prison. 

- in reality, oksana had been recruited to be a professional assassin by an elusive organization known as the twelve. she was given the codename of villanelle and was aided in completely ditching her old identity. she had been reborn, and she quickly rose in the ranks as one of the organization’s most notorious assassins; her kills were dramatic and brutal, and she spent years leaving officials that spanned across multiple countries scratching their heads. 

- along the way, villanelle had developed a close bond with her “handler” (the one responsible for keeping her in check and assigning her targets), konstantin vasiliev. their relationship resembled that of a father-daughter bond; she grew easily jealous of konstantin’s real family, which consisted of a wife and a daughter, seeking out what she’d been robbed of for most of her childhood. (daddy issues? check.) 

- all was well, until a fascinating, gutsy, determined woman had her in her sights: eve polastri, a british intelligence agent assigned with taking villanelle down. once more, villanelle found herself absolutely thriving on the attention she was showered in, selfishly seeking out more. it was difficult to determine if villanelle genuinely fostered the ability to fall in love with the woman, or if she craved the attention and the adrenaline that came from the chase.

- villanelle’s connection with eve was undeniable and unbreakable, and like a leech, she attached herself to eve and sucked her dry of everything she had; she ruined her relationship with her husband, she was responsible for the death of eve’s mentor and best friend, and she even drove eve to do truly questionable and morally reprehensible things. the two did, however, seem to care for and about one another, and neither could deny the odd dynamic/relationship they shared. 

- the game of cat-and-mouse that ensued between them didn’t stop. not until, after failing to kill konstantin when a hit was put on him by the twelve (in an inexplicable turn of events that likely suggested that he had betrayed them in one form or another), villanelle found eve in her apartment, the place entirely ransacked in an impulsive bout of rage on the operative’s end. 

- they found themselves lying face-to-face in bed, sharing an intimate moment, before eve had pulled out a knife. after insisting that she wasn’t capable of something so violent, villanelle ended up eating her words, because eve had stabbed her in the abdomen. however, the woman’s humanity shone through, because she grew frantic to help villanelle after realizing what she had done. by that point, villanelle had already staggered off of the bad, grabbed a gun, and tried to shoot at eve in her own fit of rage. by the time that eve had returned to the room, villanelle was seemingly gone. 

- in reality, villanelle had managed to make it outside of her apartment, right before operatives sent by the twelve (with a new agenda: to kill her after she failed to get rid of konstantin) ransacked the place. she miraculously dragged herself, bleeding and on the verge of collapsing, to the street and, when she failed to pick up a ride a la the hitchhiker’s method, threw herself in the way of an oncoming cab with the hope of picking up a ride that way. this recklessness, however, proved to be her ultimate downfall and led to her death. 

long story short: i will be basing villanelle around the end of season 1 / the beginning of season 2 of the series, as far as her memories go. everything from season 1 and the beginning of season 2 remains canon besides, of course, the fact that she didn’t survive the stabbing. she’ll obviously be more chill here and, y’know, not kill people, pft.  ( here is her wiki if you’re too lazy to read this whole thing . i don’t blame you, tbh . a bitch do be babbling about her wife . )

p e r s o n a l i t y . 

- ( + ) : intelligent, clever, observant, charming, bubbly. 

- ( - ) : cunning, manipulative, arrogant, reckless, remorseless. 

[psychosistr]

Talk to Me- Chapter 5

Summary: A brilliant idea on Steelbeak’s part leads to a fun time involving one of Domino’s favorite pastimes.

Notes: Another chapter of bonding and fluff before something more dramatic begins >:3

-First Chapter-

Steelbeak finished taking off the cap on the bright red fire hydrant, looking through the fence at his partner waiting on the other side. “Ready?”

Domino, standing a couple feet off to the side to avoid the incoming spray, nodded. “Do it.” He had both of his pistols out and loaded.

That was all the go-ahead Steelbeak needed to bring the thick wrench up to the pressure valve on top of the hydrant and start twisting it, releasing a fierce stream of water that rushed through the fence and all over the ground on the other side. It had been a while since he’d broken open a fire hydrant without his metal beak but, after some fumbling with the spare wrench from the emergency repair kit in the trunk of Domino’s car, it all started to come back to him. The struggle had been worth it, though, to see the excited gleam of anticipation in the loon’s eyes at what was to come.

Once there was a sufficient pool spread out across several feet ahead of him, Steelbeak gradually eased the water pressure until he was able to screw it shut again. “Alright, Dee- it’s all you!” He gave the darker bird a thumbs up once the cap was back on the hydrant.

“This should only take a minute.” Domino aimed his guns at the large pool of water and began firing at it. Instead of lead bullets, though, what came out of the pistols were small capsules that burst when they hit the water’s surface. Anywhere the capsules hit began to rapidly freeze over and, after firing enough shots to empty both clips, the ground was covered in a large, semi-even sheet of ice. “There.”

While Domino holstered his guns once more, Steelbeak tossed the wrench back into the trunk of the other bird’s car and made his way back through the open gate. “Lookin’ good, Dom.” He looked over the icy ground before giving the loon a wink. “And the ice ain’t lookin’ too bad, neither.”

“Smooth.” Domino chuckled quietly, giving the taller bird one of those charming smirks that made blood rush to his face. “If the ice is anywhere near your level, then this should be fun.” He returned the wink before stepping onto their improvised ice-rink, gliding across it with ease on his bare feet.

Despite the whole thing being his idea, Steelbeak was a little more hesitant to step out onto the ice. “Just don’t laugh at me too much when I start fallin’ on my face, alright?” He took a cautious step onto the slippery surface. So far so good. Now just add the other foot and push forward to- “Woah!”

Steelbeak, predictably, ended up sliding forward a few inches before his feet started to slide out from under him and he fell forward onto the ice. While he thankfully avoided hitting his face, the impact still knocked the wind out of him and left him momentarily dazed.

“Do you really expect me NOT to laugh after that performance?” Looking up from his sprawled out position on the ice, Steelbeak saw his partner standing in front of him. The loon was smirking down at the prone rooster with an amused smirk on his face, clearly enjoying the other’s misfortune.

With a grumble Steelbeak attempted to get back up, succeeding in getting as far as his knees without falling. “Well, ex-cu-use me- we can’t all be figure skaters.” He tried to get his feet under him and managed to get a few inches off of the ground before slipping again and falling back into a seated position. “Son of a-!”

He heard laughter and looked back up to see Domino practically doubled over and holding his midsection. While Steelbeak wanted to be mad over someone laughing at his clumsiness- and he really, really, REALLY wanted to be mad about it- he found himself just staring, instead.

Sure, he’d heard Domino laugh before, particularly tonight while they’d been talking, but the other man was usually so much more..reserved about it. A quiet laugh here, a chuckle there, maybe even a few seconds of more joyous laughter once in a while if something was particularly funny.

This, though…this was different. This was more like at the restaurant right after he’d revealed the trick he’d played on Steelbeak: It was raw and open and just so genuinely joyful between the sound and the smile on his face that it warmed something in Steelbeak’s chest and made it impossible for him not to smile and laugh along with him.

It took a while for both of them to calm down, having to wipe tears of joy from their eyes once they’d settled into quiet, breathless chuckles. “Here.” Steelbeak was surprised to see a long strip of purple fabric being dangled down in front of him. He realized quickly enough that it was Domino’s scarf and that the other end was being held in its owner’s hand while he looked down at him with a calm, patient smile as he waited for him to take the other end. “Or do you prefer having frostbite on your tail feathers?”

“Nah, can’t say that I do.” With a grin on his beak, Steelbeak grabbed the free end of the scarf. “Don’t go off on me if I pull ya down too, short fuse.”

Domino rolled his eyes, but the fond smile on his face made the action ultimately pointless. “You of all people should know that I’m stronger than I look.” Well, Steelbeak definitely couldn’t argue with that one after everything he’d seen the other bird do to guys more than twice his size. With that in mind he gripped the scarf firmly in one hand and pushed off of the ice with the other, managing to get all the way up to his feet with Domino pulling the scarf taut to offer him a counterbalance. “Three seconds without falling- you’re already improving.” The darker bird joked with a smirk. Steelbeak was about to say something snappy back in return- “Why don’t you hold on to that?”

“Huh?” Steelbeak looked at his partner in confusion, then down to the scarf still being held in his hand. “Ya sure ‘bout that, stripes?”

“If you keep falling like that, you’ll break the ice.” Domino said while wrapping his end of the scarf around his left hand twice. Once he was done, he held his hand up for the other man to see. “This way we can make it last a bit longer.”

“If ya say so, Deedee.” Steelbeak shrugged and mirrored the shorter bird’s actions with his right hand, wrapping the scarf around it twice. “Just don’t go too fast, alright? Im kinda rusty.”

“Wow, I never would have guessed.” The shorter bird said sarcastically before he pushed off of the ice with one foot to glide forward.

The sudden motion startled Steelbeak a little at first, but he was silently grateful that the other man at least heeded his request to go slow. It took him a while to get used to the feeling of skating over the ice, lots of long strides back and forth before taking slow turns around the edges to go back the other way. It had been a really long time since he’d been skating- at least two or three years, if he was remembering it correctly. Every now and then he’d start to lose his balance and nearly fall, but a firm tug on his hand would always level him out before he reached the point of no return. The quick pulls and feeling of tension around his palm were more than welcome and, after a while, a slight flush bloomed across his cheeks when he realized what it reminded him of.

He snuck a glance down, his eyes trailing along the purple fabric connecting his off-white feathered hand to the black feathered one on the other end. Even with the ends of the scarf wrapped twice around each of their hands, there was still a foot or two of space between them- just enough to avoid bumping into one another if they ended up falling. Still, despite the distance between them and the lack of warmth in his palm, the pressure around his hand and the bright smile on the other man’s face left him with a feeling better than every instance of the real thing put together.

“Dang…you’re amazin’..” It wasn’t until red eyes were looking at him with a quirked brow that Steelbeak realized he’d said those words out loud. He felt his whole face go red and he looked away in embarrassment, trying to recover from his slip of the tongue. “I mean, you’re, y’know, amazin’ at this skatin’ stuff! Haha, yeah, that’s it! Dunno how ya can do it so good with no shoes on or nothin’!”

When he hazarded a glance back at his partner, he saw the aquatic fowl was looking at him with an amused smirk. “Uh huh.” He said sarcastically before guiding both of them around another turn. “If you’re really interested,” The teasing tone of his voice clearly communicated that he knew the other wasn’t actually that interested in it. “It’s mostly because of how much I’ve practiced.” They got around the turn and started skating back the other way, the loon even showing off a little by skating backwards so he could face his partner properly as they talked. “My base up north was in a colder climate and we dealt with snow and ice quite a bit throughout the year. I spent a lot of time on breaks and between missions going out for walks and skating on the lake nearby. It was refreshing after spending so long cooped up in the academy.”

Feeling that the embarrassed flush on his cheeks had calmed down significantly, Steelbeak regarded the loon curiously. “Thought ya said your academy was up north, too?”

The amused smile on Domino’s face quickly turned to a grimace at the mention of his old training camp. “Yes, but I only ever got to go outside for training exercises..the instructor kept me too busy for anything else..”

“Real stick in the mud, huh?” Now Steelbeak really WAS interested.

“More like a thorn in my side.” The grimace turned into a full-blown scowl as he spoke, still keeping an even pace across the ice. “I don’t know what I did to piss him off, but the general in charge of my class had it out for me from day one: He always singled me out for extra work to do around the base, so I never had time to study. When I started my firearms training he shot me in the leg and gave the excuse of ‘The first thing to train on is how to handle BEING shot’. Not to mention he took every opportunity to hit me from behind or pull out my feathers.” He rubbed at his head with his free hand, clearly remembering the feeling all too well. “Then, even after I passed my final exams with some of the best marks in my class, he STILL refused to give me my agent status and tried to make me an eggman.”

“Geez, what a prick.” Steelbeak was scowling now, too. “What’s the guy’s name?” He’d have to pay the jerk a visit sometime in the future, maybe see if he could pull a few strings to have him reassigned or put on a suicide mission or something..

“General Rover.” Domino huffed and shook his head. “I already-”

“Wait, wait, wait- hold it!” Steelbeak cut him off before he could continue, his earlier scowl replaced with a curious look bordering on bewilderment. “General Rover? As in General ‘Red’ Rover? Old dog, dark brown-but-kinda-red fur, some sorta Australian breed?” He moved a finger vertically over his left eye with his free hand. “Real bad scar right about here? Eye’s kinda milky lookin’ an’ don’t work that well?”

Domino looked a little baffled, but nodded nonetheless. “Yes, that’s him. Was he a friend of yours or-?”

The loon was interrupted once again, though this time it was by Steelbeak laughing so hard that he had to stop and grab the bars of the fence at the end of their path rather than turn as they had been. “You’re pullin’ my leg!” He wheezed out between his uncontrollable fits of laughter. “I-I’m dyin’! Oh-ho man, I’m dyin’ here!”

Domino eyed the taller man with a look somewhere between confusion and caution, likely thinking the other was in the process of losing his mind with how hysterical he was acting. “I think I’m missing the joke here..”

Steelbeak made an effort to calm down, he really did, but the whole thing was just so FUNNY that the best he could do was look at his confused partner with a face-splitting grin and gasp out a few words here and there between barely-restrained chuckles. “That..That’s the chump whose wallet I stole!!”

Red eyes blinked and widened in surprise. “Wait, are you serious?”

“Yeah!” Steelbeak tapped the eye that he’d indicated earlier. “I gave the old dog that scar when I was a kid! Cut ‘im an’ left my knife right in his eye- messed the old dog up for life!”

“That was YOU?” Domino’s confusion was quickly turning into amusement. “Wow…what are the chances?”

“I know, right?!” It still took a few more deep breaths for the rooster’s fit to finally stop. “O-ho man, that’s the best laugh I’ve had all night.” He used his free hand to wipe a stray tear from his eyes before looking at the darker bird with a grin. “Yeah, I think the guy’s got a problem with birds or somethin’, and what happened with me probably didn’t help any- sorry ya got the fallout from it.”

“Don’t, it wasn’t your fault he was a terrible person- I’m fairly certain he’s ALWAYS been like that.” The loon shook his head with a chuckle, a deadly smirk slipping onto his beak. “Well..I suppose I should say he was like that..”

Steelbeak smirked back at his partner, already getting an idea of what happened from that blood-thirsty gleam in the other bird’s eyes. “Ya blew up on the guy didn’t ya, short fuse?”

“Making me an eggman was the last straw.” The short-tempered bird sighed with a tone of mock sympathy. “He just pushed me one too many times. Such a tragic accident.”

“I can hear the world weepin’ over it.” Steelbeak matched the other’s mock-pity before they both broke the façade and started to chuckle and snicker again. “Wish I could’ve been there t’ see it.”

“Do you remember the man that grabbed my shoulder in the hall right after we started working together?” He continued when he received a nod from the taller bird. “Imagine that, but about fifty times worse.”

If Steelbeak had less self-control, then he would’ve trilled at the other’s words- the more sadistic side of his mind just adored what his partner was capable of (as long as he wasn’t the target of it, of course). “O-ho-ho, you DESTROYED ‘im, didn’t ya? C’mon, c’mon: I need details.”

“Well, if you insist.” Domino smirked as he began to recount the full story of how he brutally attacked his former instructor/tormentor.

Steelbeak had every intention of listening, too, more than happy to hear all the gory details…but a spec of red on the shorter bird’s shoulder distracted him. Normally he wouldn’t think anything odd about seeing red on his partner since it was one of the main accents on his usual outfit, but the loon wasn’t wearing any red tonight. What was even more out of place was the fact that it was moving like a bug, going up from his shoulder towards his head, but he couldn’t see any legs or wings moving. If anything, it looked more like a la-

“MOVE!” He acted without thinking and practically tackled the darker bird.

If what he saw didn’t kill him, his partner probably would.

<-Previous Chapter Next Chapter->

End Notes: Will I ever write a story where these two don’t end up in some kind of danger?...Probably not x3

Also, just wanted to add that I consulted @thefriendlyfour regarding the general from Domino’s training days to get a better idea of what a jerk he was and was granted free reign to come up with a name and design for him. I went with the name “Red” Rover to fit in with the children’s game theme that seems to follow any OC’s associated with Domino’s past x3 He’s an Australian Kelpie with dark brownish-red fur, contributing to his nickname.

[trophywifejimgordon]

so, y’know how midoriya and bakugou are 100% the idiots who’ve seen each other every day for the past decade and still don’t know jack shit about each other? i’m applying that to their being trans. 

for midoriya, his mother has been very supportive of his transition--by the time he starts at UA, he’s had top surgery and everything. bakugou hasn’t been so open about it with his parents (being trans really plays negatively with his inferiority-superiority complex; he’s got something to prove, nobody can ever think he’s weak or they might see through him), and he kind of fucks himself over by wearing a binder all the time, every day, every single second other people are around to see him and many seconds when they aren’t, besides. the thing is, before surgery, deku was also this way (you can’t tell me that he would let something like a binder compressing the fuck out of his chest & lungs stop him from going on about his day and pretending everything’s fine, how tf do you think he got so used to breaking all his bones so easily, ANSWER ME THAT), and it’s totally the kind of thing they could talk about, if they, y’know, talked, but. ha.

bakugou deals with dysphoria by posturing and yelling and sometimes acting out violently, partially because that’s how his personality works, but partially because it’s masculine, and that feels right in itself. deku doesn’t feel like he has to do all that, exactly, but it’s another stumbling block, along with his lack of quirk, that he grew up knowing he had to overcome and hide. the thing is, though, whenever he’s pressed to act particularly masculine, he thinks of kacchan, his friend, because deku admires him and in his mind, bakugou kind of becomes both his symbol of victory and of masculinity--in other words, when deku puts on an especially masc front, he’s subconsciously parroting katsuki.

katsuki himself, meanwhile, resents deku above all others, because deku alone of all the kids in their neighborhood doesn’t think that he’s invincible, and it burns. katsuki is clearly stronger than this kid, he’s got a powerful quirk while deku doesn’t have one at all, he’s better than deku, so why does deku still offer him a hand up when he falls? we’ve already been shown that to him, it feels like the answer is that deku thinks he’s better (stronger, smarter, more powerful) than bakugou, and that he’s being looked down upon. in the context of his transness, he interprets this as deku never actually seeing him as a boy; he thinks deku is treating him like a damsel in distress, again and again and again. no matter how many times bakugou proves that he’s stronger than deku in every conceivable way, deku still looks at him with concern in his eyes, and bakugou hates it. 

all of this ramps up, and keeps ramping up, straight through their acceptance into UA and all of the events which follow, until finally, finally, something breaks, and bakugou vents how fucking frustrating it is to know in the back of his mind that deku has this information over him, that deku still thinks of him, on some level, as female, that even kamino was just one more “save the princess” exercise for deku that he’s sure deku just delighted in. 

he’s super pissed, and insecure, and upset, and deku is just standing there staring because. fuck?

it just clicked. 

they’ve known each other for about 13 years now, give or take, and they’re fucking idiots. he’s been skating around kacchan all this time thinking that he knows about deku being trans and probably sees it as just one more reason to look down on him... and now, he’s finding out that not only did kacchan not know, but he was spending all that time thinking the same exact thing about deku. 

izuku really just has to like. stand there for a second. he can’t respond. he can’t even begin to address this situation. katsuki interprets this as him blowing off everything he’s said, though, and so he gets even more upset, until deku is finally like, “wait!! wait, kacchan, you’ve got it all wrong--i’m not looking down on you, i didn’t even know, and--and i’m trans too!”, which is a declaration that pushes things even further out of line, because katsuki’s first instinct is to think that deku is lying to make fun of him about this even more, until wait, deku shows him the scars from top surgery, and fuck, everything comes crashing down on him, too. 

they sort of just have to stand there for a moment, because god damn, they really do have the worst possible communication skills when it comes to one another. like, it’s been 12, maybe 13 years, and somehow neither one of them realized that they have this in common? neither one of them ever brought it up? they kind of have to reevaluate their whole worlds in that moment and figure out where they stand now--and what it means that they share this trait with one another. what it means that there’s someone who understands, and not only that, it’s the person that they’ve been intertwined with and learning from since forever. 

it’s basically too much. that night, they just kind of stare at each other gaping and eventually awkwardly turn tail and head back to their respective rooms to silently contemplate this new development. later on, though, this becomes just one more step in solidifying their bond and partnership, and for the first time in both their lives, they’re able to confide in someone completely about all the gender stuff they’re still not sure they completely understand. and it’s good.

(at some point, deku mumbles out something about how he models after katsuki when he’s trying to be as masculine as possible, and on the surface, bakugou tells him off for being a stalker and using his moves, but underneath, he’s totally swelling with pride.)