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holdmytesseract · 4 months

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moodboard by the wonderful @chennqingg <3

World's End [EoH]

Daryl Dixon x fem!Reader

Summary: Strange things start to happen to people; caused by a virus. Most of the humanity hides away in their houses - unlike you. Feeling the urge and duty to help people as a nurse, you keep on working - much to your boyfriend's dislike.

Warnings: angst, fluff, the outbreak - basically, protective!Daryl, dad!Daryl moments, TWD stuff - weapons, walkers

Pre-Apocalypse Era!

Word Count: 2,1k

a/n: You asked for it and I am here to deliver! 🫡 I hope y'all going to like this... 😊

EoH Masterlist °☆• Daryl Masterlist °☆• Masterlist

"I don like this, Y/N..." Daryl stated. His voice was hushed, due to a sleeping Teddy on his arms, but still firm. "Ya shouldn't go ta work. Please... Stay at home."

You sighed; knowing very well that he was most likely right - but you couldn't. "I know, sweetie, but I can't. They need me. Especially now. It's my job." Daryl inhaled deeply; almost frustrated. "I understand that, sunshine, but... We don know what this virus is. So many people already died because of that shit - and you wanna go straight into the danger zone? I don't want ya ta catch whatever it is. I can't lose ya. We can't lose ya."

You swallowed hard; feeling the weight of Daryl's words. "You're right. It's dangerous, but... it's my duty as a nurse to help people. It would be selfish and cowardly to not go to work. I can't let all these people die. I've got to save 'em." Your boyfriend chewed on his bottom lip; pacing up and down the living room of your shared apartment. Teddy was luckily still sleeping in his arms; his little head resting on his father's broad shoulder.

The brown haired man had to choose his next words wisely now. He knew that.

"What if ya can't save 'em? What if they're lost?" You shook your head. "I refuse to believe that. Doctors and scientists all around the world are already working flat out to find a cure." "Yeah, but you've seen the news, Y/N. The government told us to stay at home with a reason. You know about the rumours. Damnit, you even told me that-... I-"

Daryl took another deep breath; quickly shifting Teddy, so that he was able to run a hand over his face and pinch the bridge of his nose. "Fucks sake, I just want ya to be safe..."

You stepped up to him; taking his free hand in yours. "I know what I am doing, Daryl. Trust me, okay?" You squeezed his hand and smiled at him softly.

Your boyfriend sighed once again; tilting his head back - which gave you a delicious view of his neck.

"Ain't havin' a chance ta hold ya back, right?"

You stepped closer and brushed your lips over his; feeling his scruff scratching your skin. "I'll see you tonight," you whispered and pressed a kiss to your son's brown curls on top of his head, grabbed your things and left the apartment. Daryl was powerless.

Your way to work was... aggravated, to say the least. Most of the public transports didn't work at the moment. Only the really necessary ones. Therefore, it was difficult for you to even catch a bus to work.

And it wasn't just that... Gainesville was like a morgue. Empty streets, restaurants and coffee shops. You only saw a few people taking their dogs out for a walk, but nothing more. Everybody was scared and followed the government's orders - but you hadn't the time to be afraid. You were needed.

Daryl sat on the sofa; nervously chewing on the inside of hi lip. His thoughts revolved around you - and only you. He didn't give a shit about what happened to other people, but you.

The redneck was staring at the old clock which hung on the wall in the living room; watching the minutes ticking by agonisingly slow.

"Daddy, look!" Teddy's sweet, soft voice brought him back down to reality. At least for a few moments...

Daryl averted his eyes from the clock and looked down, to where his son sat on the fluffy carpet; looking through a book you had given him yesterday. A book which had been laying in an abandoned drawer, because he was too young for it. Not anymore...

Teddy pointed on a drawing of a plane and it's pilot; an airport in the background. "It's a pwane!" Shining eyes met his similar ones, as the little boy looked up at his dad; smiling. Daryl couldn't help but smile. This little human being meant the world to him. Something he never thought he'd say. But it was the truth. He'd do anything for that kid. Go to hell and back. Daryl didn't care.

He also couldn't deny that Teddy changed him for the better.

Daryl's hand vanished in the mop of chestnut brown hair on his son's head; gently ruffling it. "You're right, Ted. 'S a plane." With his other hand, he turned the page, "N what's that?" and pointed on a truck, which had a lot of logs loaded; driving down a street.

Teddy's eyes scanned the picture; concentrated. "A tuck!" Daryl couldn't suppress the small, affectionate laugh which escaped his lips. "Almost, buddy. A truck. Keep on learning, you're doin' good." He ruffled the boy's hair again and stood up to get himself dressed. He needed fresh air. And distraction.

About twenty minutes later, Daryl was walking down an empty street with Teddy's small hand neatly tucked in his; waddling beside him. Looking around, he could see people gazing judgmental at him through their windows. Some had already barricaded their doors. It was kinda nuts to see that. He noticed the clear difference between him and the rest of the world. He didn't care if the world would go to shit. After all, the world never offered or gave him much. Just you, his son and brother. He didn't need or want more.

"Daddy, can I pway?" Once more ripped him Teddy's voice out of his thoughts. The boy pointed at the little playground you and Daryl always took him to. It was, of course, completely empty. The man nodded. "Sure. Go ahead." Teddy giggled happily and ran as fast as his little legs carried him towards the small slide.

After helping Teddy to slide down the slide a few times, he stood back at the sidelines and watched his son play in the sandbox. Daryl was quite a few meters away from his toddler; smoking a cigarette, but never letting him out of his sight.

But then his gaze drifted down the street for a short moment - which left the man more than just utterly shocked and speechless...

Up ahead he could see three people walking into his direction - but something was off about them. Daryl noticed right away. Almost dripping over their own feet; rather tumbling than walking, strange noises, blood stains and- His eyes widened. One of them had a bullet in his head. Dude shouldn't be alive.

And suddenly it came crashing down on Daryl. The rumours were true. The dead weren't just dead anymore. And where were probably the most dead people besides the cemetery? Right. The hospital.

The realisation pierced marrow and bone. You were anything but safe.

A disgusting growl from distance reminded Daryl that danger was lurking ahead. Whatever these... people had become... He didn't want to cross them - or risk his son's life.

"Teddy!" Daryl called out. "C'mere!" Teddy, being the well-behaved boy he was, got immediately on his small feet and ran up to his dad. Daryl immediately lifted him up in his arms. "Daddy?" "We're goin'. Now." He turned on his heels and started to walk quickly back home. "Daddy, are they sick?" The little boy asked; now obviously facing the dead. The man swallowed hard and cupped his son's head gently. "Don look at 'em, buddy." "Kay."

Back in your shared apartment, Daryl threw several things into a bag. He had a feeling. For all this time, he had a feeling that this all wouldn't end well, and he was right. Whatever it was the virus did to people. It had started. This was just the beginning of the end.

Teddy watched his dad with wide eyes; not knowing in the slightest what was going on.

Daryl slung the bag over one shoulder, grabbed his crossbow from the locked cabinet and threw it over his other shoulder. Then he gave Teddy his stuffed dog and picked him up once more. "Daddy and Teddy going?" Daryl nodded. "We are visiting mommy." The boy's eyes lit up. "Go see mommy?" "Yes, buddy." A cheerful giggle slipped past Teddy's lips.

And when Daryl left the house for a second time, the streets were everything but empty..

In the hospital, chaos had erupted as well. Seeing the dead suddenly roam through the streets and literally ambushing Gainesville, caused everybody to panic. Naturally. You tried to keep a cool head, even though it was difficult with the unbelievable happening right in front of your eyes. The most wanted to run. Others wanted to hide. Your instincts told you that it was probably right to run, but your wit told you it was wiser to stay inside and hide. You talked to so many people – colleagues, patients, family members of the patients; wanted to convince them to stay. Some of them were listening, but the lot of them didn't - and ran straight into their undoing. Unbeknownst to them or you.

Now, you were staring out of one of the big windows; chewing on your nails and watching the horrible scenes unfold right in front of your eyes as your heart was pumping adrenaline through your body. It felt like you had fallen straight into a nightmare. You wanted to turn your back and look away, but you couldn't. You were like frozen to the spot - until... "D-Daryl?" You breathed into the empty room; eyes widening as you saw someone who looked significantly like your boyfriend ran - with a little boy on his arms, straight towards the main entrance of the hospital; paving his way through the dead. After all, Daryl wasn't stupid. He quickly figured out what had to be done.. Unfortunately.

"Daryl!" You shouted again and quickly ran out of the room, past several panicking, crying and yelling people and down towards your family.

"Daryl!" You met him in the entry area; noticing right away that he had barricaded the doors. "Y/N!" Immediate relief washed over his face when he spotted you. You ran over to him, meeting him in the middle of the way. You literally fell into his arms; hugging him and Teddy tightly. "Ya alright?!" Daryl asked; almost panicky. You nodded against his shoulder. "Y-Yes, but... What is happening?Why does it happen so suddenly, I... I don't understand..." Your boyfriend pulled back and cupped your cheeks. "Me neither, sunshine. All I know is, we gotta go. Pick up Merle and search for a safe place somewhere outta town."

Tears started to prick your eyes. "W-What? B-But we can't just leave! What about our apartment? My job..." Your gaze fell on a clingy and scared Teddy, who was holding on to his father for dear life. "Teddy..." The boy was way too small to understand, of course. "Mommy..." He whispered; close to crying. Your heart broke, "Baby..." so you quickly took him into your arms; running a soothing hand through his hair and kissing the crown of his head repeatedly. "It's all good, sweetie, okay? Mommy and daddy are here. Nothing is going to happen to you." You tried your best to reassure the boy, while Daryl's hand rested on his small back, in order to provide comfort as well.

"We gotta go..." Daryl repeated, "We can't stay. If this is truly the world's end, I ain't risking yours or Ted's life." and adjusted his crossbow. "I have ta protect ya. No matter what."

The sound of hands against glass cut through the room, causing the both of you to realise in sheer horror that the dead were trying to get inside the hospital. You swallowed hard; breath quickening.

"Y/N..." Daryl's voice ripped you out of your state of shock. You nodded. "O-Okay..." Your boyfriend gave you a nod as well and took your hand in his; gently pulling you along... "C'mon." And you let him.

Together you took one of the emergency exits and left the town. Daryl guided you through the woods, since he spent a lot of time there; practising to hunt together with his brother - and father, back when he was younger.

Now his knowledge and survival instincts came in handy. If the apocalypse was truly happening right now in front of your eyes, you knew that you didn't want to be somewhere else than with Daryl and Teddy. Daryl may have been called a lot by lots of different peoples, but one thing was certain... He was a fighter. A survivor. There wasn't a safer place on this godforsaken earth than at Daryl Dixon's side.

Tags: @suniloli @stitchintimefan @in-this-minute @wolfsmom1 @loz-3 @fictive-sl0th @fuseburner @mandywholock1980 @celtic-crossbow @lou12346789 @mischief-dream @km-ffluv @crimson25 @buttercupcookies-blog @salvinaa @javagirl328 @sweetz1919 @erebus-et-eigengrau

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sunnys-out · 1 year

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I've loved you for so long (1) | Lucy Bronze

A/N: Hello! I haven't written in so long but here is something that I have been working on since the WC (she's a short one I know). I didn't post it earlier because I was moving and starting a new job but everything has calmed down and I had time to edit it. Please let me know what y'all think and hopefully, I can post the 2nd part soon! If you like my writing maybe through in a suggestion and I'll try my best! :D

Content: Angst, Fluff if you squint

{Word Count: 2004}

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I've loved you for so long

Oh, I'd forgotten how it feels

Feelings come back strong

'I've Loved You For So Long - The Aces'

Lucy and I had met, informally, in 2015 in Canada, we never played against each other in that World Cup but that didn’t stop us from bumping into each other at Tim Hortons. The couple of times that we ran into each other at the World Cup caused small conversations and laughs that left me wanting more. God, even just her smile left me wanting.

I didn’t message her throughout our respective seasons right after the World Cup but sometimes I’d click on her Instagram profile and just scroll and see her thrive in Manchester City. Well I did drum up the courage to message once.

‘It’d probably be weird if I messaged her out of the blue right?... I mean it has been weeks since Canada?’ I told myself as I lay on my small apartment couch in Portland.

My thumb hovered over the send button with a slight tremble.

“Fuck it” My thumb harshly hit the screen and the quick ‘Wanted to say that you had an amazing tournament. Shame we never played against each other ♥️That goal against Canada was a banger meant to send that in Canada lol!” message was delivered.

I swear I threw my phone onto the other side of my couch and took a shower not expecting to see two notifications sent five minutes after me.

‘Lucy Bronze liked your message’

‘Lucy Bronze: ‘means a lot. Hope to see you again soon, miss world champion ⭐️⭐️⭐️’

I didn’t notice the smile growing as I looked at the notifications on the screen. I probably read it 20 times, setting the phone down on my coffee table and pacing the room debating whether I should respond or what I even should respond with.

“Lucy is funny, maybe I can joke about how it’s been long or maybe just a ‘feeling is mutual’” I said aloud to myself.

‘Why am I getting worked up about this?” My hair is now messy by how many times I redid my ponytail pacing the room for 13 minutes. I kept procrastinating and just settled with getting ready for bed.

‘I’ll just respond tomorrow,’ I said, confidently, plugging in my phone and placing it on my nightstand. That sentiment lasted about 2 minutes before I walked quickly back into my room picking up my phone, opening the message, and liking Lucy’s before responding.

Y/N: I would love to see you again! I hope it's somewhere other than Tim Hortons even though I loved that place lol 🙂

My phone immediately locked as I got into bed and turned away from my phone. I closed my eyes tightly trying to go to sleep quickly so that in the rare probability that Lucy would continue the conversation, I could deal with it tomorrow morning, maybe ask Klingenburg for advice. Though she might scold me for fraternizing with the enemy, jokingly of course. Defenders knew other defenders right? Kling would find it funny that a right winger is flirting with a right back.

My thoughts were interrupted by one vibration and then two more in succession. My body slowly turned over to see my phone lit up still and then slowly dimming. My hand, subconsciously, went over, picked up my phone, and opened the messages seeing Lucy liking my message.

Lucy: Let me buy you a cup whenever you’re in Manchester; there are some cafes you’d like here.

Lucy: I would love to show you around 🙂

I smiled at the messages and immediately replied without a second thought

Y/N: I will let you know because I do need a vacation 🥲

Y/N: And I would love to give you a tour of Portland, the coffee capital of the world. Worth it.

I stared at the messages until I saw a little heart appear on my last message. The little dots of a message incoming made me nervously tap the side of my phone.

Lucy Bronze: I’ll take that as a promise 😉

Y/N: And I expect that cup of coffee in Manchester is a promise too ☺️

Lucy would only like the message and I would promptly go to sleep after waiting 15 minutes for a message that never came. I tried my best to not think about it but the feeling that came from reading her messages and the smile that would creep onto my face…I wouldn’t forget.

Hayley Raso came into my life slowly after that. Glances turned to long stares. The lingering touches throughout practice became more than a pat on the back for a job well done. The smiles and laughs echoed off the walls of Providence Park as we walked to our cars until it was just to my car.

The weekly movie nights at my place turned into watching a show and cuddling together after practice for days on end. Another toothbrush appeared in the bathroom and suddenly my queen-sized bed wasn’t as empty.

Mornings were met with a quick kiss, a hug from behind, and sweet nothings whispered in each other's ear.

Going to practice wasn’t done alone anymore and it was nice to have someone waiting on you if you had to stay behind to see the physio.

It was easy since we were both playing for Portland at the time and the team weren’t surprised when we told them.

Little by little the Australian would appear in my Instagram photos and I in hers.

The one that “broke the internet” was Hayley’s post of her kissing me on the cheek at the end of a game when the USWNT and Australia had a friendly. The one that sealed the deal for everyone was my Christmas post of photos of the party I had at my apartment. One, a particular one at the end, Hayley was in my lap while I kissed her.

Something, however, nagged at me every time I saw a certain person's name pop up “Lucy Bronze liked your post” but I ignored it. I now know it was the feeling of the “what if” and “what could have been”.

‘Did Lucy not want this with me? Maybe that’s why she never followed up. I probably said something to scare her away. Hayley didn’t run away’ I remember thinking to myself and as if on cue two arms snake their way around my waist.

“Everything alright babe?” Hayley said into my back, I, immediately, felt my shoulders relax at the sound of Hayley’s voice.

I whispered, “I'm alright, just read some rude comments. You know how some people get”. I lied to Hayley; I was happy in our relationship and shouldn’t be wondering about the “what could have been” with someone that wasn’t her.

Hayley would then go on to say that she’s told me to never look at the comments because when have the mean ones ever done something for us? She’d led me back to the bedroom to get ready for bed as we had an early practice but not after she promised to take my mind off the “negative comments”...it worked.

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She Believes Cup March 6th, 2016,

Lucy Bronze’s POV

We hadn’t played the United States in Canada which is a shame to not be able to play the future World Champions. Once, we had heard that we would be playing them in the She Believes Cup. I was excited for multiple reasons.

The US call up was released and I would be playing against (y/n). Since the World Cup, (Y/N) was making a name for herself as a strong right winger and playmaker for Portland and the National team.

On the pitch, she seemed cold and intimidating, but I met her as the complete opposite.

I was able to just watch her tap her lip with her finger with her US cap on backward as she decided which pastry she wanted with her coffee at that Tim Hortons. She whistled quietly as she waited her turn and then adorably, fumbled through her order. Then humming to herself happily as she waited on the side with her warm croissant covered by a napkin.

I was in awe of her. I had seen her play before and was always impressed by what I’d seen but never played against her.

As I went up to order my own coffee and pastry I noticed her scrolling through her phone, laughing to herself. (y/n’s) eyes crinkle when she laughs or smiles really big. She hadn’t noticed me when I stood next to her, also waiting for my drink, there I took notice that she was at least three inches above me and that she sticks out her tongue when she is reading something.

I breathed in and said loud enough for her to hear as she read, “I won’t tell your trainer if you don’t tell mine” I shook my little bag containing the coffee cake I had just ordered. I chuckled at the little jump she gave when she noticed me.

“Shit, sorry you scared me” a nervous laugh leaving her mouth

I extended my hand, “Sorry bout that. I’m Lucy, Lucy Bronze with England”

She completed the handshake, “(y/n) (l/n) with the US…obviously” She pointed to her hat that had USA stitched on the back.

The conversation had good enough banter that we both remained at a table for about 2 hours talking about life and football. I could tell you that I fell for the way she looked at me with her gentle (y/e/c) eyes as she described the antics of her new golden retriever puppy named Chili she had adopted when she went to Portland.

I never really was intimidated or made nervous by any American player, especially on the pitch but watching her warm up with an icy cold expression during the She Believes Cup match made me question if the person I met at Tim Horton’s was the same person.

I don’t think I was nervous but I lost count of how many times I would try to get a glimpse of her as she warmed up. Every time I did I’d feel the blush on my cheeks as I remembered the short text conversation that we had shortly after the World Cup.

I regretted so much for not following up immediately; I got scared. If (y/n) asked me today why I didn’t respond, I wouldn’t have known what to say to be honest. Lack of courage was what Jill had told me as Jordan patted my back while reading the messages.

The moment that I finally gained the courage to message (y/n) on Instagram to invite her to Manchester for a visit, was the day when I saw the picture of Hayley Raso kissing her cheek at a friendly. It was the first thing I saw when I opened the app to message her.

I remember my stomach dropping like the feeling when you don’t feel the bottom of a pool.

I had it all planned in my head that she’d accept and I had a mini itinerary in my head of things she would’ve enjoyed and sightseeing spots. But the photo of her with her face buried in Hayley’s neck as she hugged her made the feeling worse.

Raso had beat me to (y/n) and she didn’t even know it. I kicked myself for not being brave. I would’ve had her in my arms sooner. I tell her all the time that I fell for her immediately and from meeting her I wanted more of her every passing day.

Just seeing her across the field filled me with the tucked away feelings I had for her. I remember thinking…What I would have given to be there again talking about the most mundane things over coffee. Hearing her try her hardest to tell a joke but failing as she laughs remembering the punch line or even unconsciously speaking with an English accent when we spoke… God, I really loved her for so long.

#woso #wwc 2023 #lucy bronze #lucy bronze imagine #woso x reader #engwnt x reader #lucy bronze x reader #barca femeni

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sidusvenari · 1 year

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ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤVAMPIRE .. !

where you made a real big mistake, but Miles made the worst one look fine.

inspired by Oliva Rodrigo lyrics.

pairing: e42!aged up!Miles x reader

genre: angst, no comfort.

warnings: infidelity, both of them are 19, cursing, Miles being toxic

a.n: hi guys! i haven't posted day 2 of my writing challenge so here it is! i'll post twice today to make up to it, and i'm already working on it! love y'all, enjoy! xoxo.

taglist form

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤPLEASE CONSIDER REBBLOGING!

you hadn't heard from Miles in days. sick worried, you had talked to all of his friends, and all of them would just shrug you off, and you knew something was wrong. you knew that it wasn't exam season at college, so why was he avoiding you? leaving you on delivered every day, not answering your calls, nothing. it was like you never met each other. until you got a text from an unknown number: a picture of Miles kissing another girl. the one girl that would always say how cute you two were together, the one girl that Miles told you not to worry about. you just couldn't believe that, after all of that you've done for him, you ended up being the fool. you texted him that same day.

you: we gotta talk.

mi vida <3: im omw

you: bet.

(delivered at 3pm)

he showed up at your window in his prowler suit at 2AM while you were writing your daily diary entry.

"hey." he called, making you look up from your notebook. "you good?"

"yeah, i'm good."

he looked at you, and you could see that he wanted to tell you something. you knew him better than he did, and that was the worst part of it.

"spill it."

"i… i fucked up, ma."

he mumbled out, and immediately you knew what he was talking about. why he was so distant. why his mother was avoiding you, why even his uncle, who was never even nice to you, asked if you were okay this morning when you ran into him.

"fuck yeah, you did."

"i'm sorry, y/n, i really am-"

"no you're fucking not. don't bullshit me, Miles Gonzales Morales."

"can you listen to me first?"

"no! no, i can't! God, i can't believe how stupid i was."

"ma, you're overreacting."

"am i? am i overreacting when some random number text me a picture of my fucking boyfriend kissing the one girl i was insecure about?"

"it was a one night stand, ma, i made a mistake! i love you!"

"no, Miles, i made a mistake. i made a real big one, and you made it look so fine!" you raised your voice, tears flooding your eyes. "and you can't love anyone, because that would mean you have a fucking heart!"

"c'mon, y/n, you're better than this. bet it was those crazy friends of yours that filled your head with that bullshit."

"don't you open your mouth to talk about them! they warned me! they told me you were bad news and you called them crazy like you did just now! God, i hate the way i called them crazy too…"

you leaned back, covering your face so he wouldn't see you crying. he walked to you, taking your hands and analyzing your face carefully.

"are you done? can i kiss you now?"

you scoffed, pushing him away

"is she better than me?" you mumbled, wiping the tears away.

"what?"

"is she better than me, Miles?

"you can't ask me that-"

"yes or no?"

he was silent, but you felt the energy shift.

"no one is better than you."

"it's incredible how you lie without flinching."

"listen to me-"

"get out of my fucking house."

"woah, who do you think you're talking to?"

"a stranger." you looked into his eyes, and you knew he knew it was over. "i hope you're happy, Miles. i truly do. but we both know that you'll never have another me."

he started to walk away, ego as shattered as your heart.

"thank God for that."

you took the ring out of your finger, placing it on his hands.

"we'll see about that."

you watched as he walked away, giving you one last look before leaving through the window. as you set down on your bed taking the notebook to write that down, you felt your eyes tearing up, and soon teardrops were staining the black ink that covered the pages. you knew that, eventually, Miles would regret that, but it would be too late.

this is so bad, i'm so sorry (⁠-⁠_⁠-⁠;⁠) i hope y'all like it and let me know if you want a part two !! love y'all, xoxo!!

taglist: @elusive-honeydew

edit: I'm working on a part 2 of this one!!!!please lemme know if y'all wanna be tagged!

#42 miles morales x you #miles morales x you #earth 42 miles x reader #atsv x reader #moon writes!#writing challenge #miles morales angst #i'm sorry this is terrible #miles morales #miles morales x reader #42 miles morales #42 miles morales x reader

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emsprovisions · 3 months

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Hi y'all! I read so many Tarlos fics this past month so I wanted to do a little highlight of some of my favorites! It was honestly very hard to narrow down the one shots but I tried 😂

Oneshots

Rain on Me by @ironheartwriter Rating: Explicit Word count: 6,622 Why I liked it: Lana has become such a dear friend in such a short time and I said one little thing in a tumblr ask response and something like two days later she busted out 6k words of pure magic! I love this fic, it's so sweet. We get to see our boys have some downtime to themselves and they truly truly deserve it!

breathing deeper than i've ever done by @your-catfish-friend Rating: Explicit Word count: 4,693 Why I liked it: This fic is so hot! This fic is heavy on senses, particularly the sense of smell. There's a part towards the end that really makes me insane where TK and Carlos are taking a shower together and it smells like "TK-and-Carlos" which makes me insane because they really are One.

Butterflies and Sky-High by @paperstorm Rating: Teen and up Word count: 8,031 Why I liked it: Demi!Carlos my beloved. I strongly subscribe to this headcanon and Andie, as always, you have executed it so beautifully! I loved this exploration of Carlos's labels, his spiral, his conversation with Paul, how he finally talked to TK about how he feels, it was all so beautiful.

This is The Sound of You Here and Now by @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut Rating: Mature Word count: 3,040 Why I liked it: I was sick with a cold and asked for sick fics of my boys to get me through those trying times. J, thank you so much for delivering! This was beautiful and genuinely it made me cry. I love how they take care of and love each other.

Long fics

Right Before Your Eyes by Goody Rating: Teen and up Word count: 19,894 Why I liked it: This one is so much fun! It feels like watching an episode, it is that realistic. Your characterization was amazing! Also poor TK, he suffers so much already and we just put him through more! But this was still really good! (and if anyone knows their tumblr, please let me know so I can properly tag them!)

to build a home by @freneticfloetry Rating: Explicit Word count: 63,872 Why I liked it: I don't think I will ever recover from the feels this one gave me. I love Carlos exploration fics. I love how well the angst was balanced with fluff and spicier scenes! I'm working on a wip rn that has definitely been influenced by the layout and flow of this gorgeous fic. It's melancholic in the best way, beautiful, and true to character. I won't stop thinking about it any time soon.

Series

Missing Moments by @paperstorm Works: 34 Complete: no Why I liked it: special shoutout to the fic from this series, Homeward Bound because I think about it often. I really, really love this series. Sometimes I confuse details from canon with details from these fics because they feel so canon to me. We needed the background scenes and you have more than delivered, Andie! Love this series so much and I can't wait to see what you do with the rest!

wherever you stray, I follow by @strandnreyes Works: 2 Complete: no Why I liked it: My latest obsession is this series. TK and Carlos are soulmates and now they get to live for eternity. Sometimes it's a bit bittersweet, especially in the second part, when Carlos thinks about all the changes that will happen to them someday, but they have each other and all the love and time in the world and it is beautiful. I love the setting, I love author Carlos, and I love how you adapted all the other characters and how seamlessly they fit into their roles in Castine. This au is gorgeous and I found myself wishing I didn't have to leave that world so soon. I can't wait for the next installment! I am excited to see where you might take it.

#long post #fic recs #reading roundup #tarlos fic recs #tarlos fanfiction #tarlos fanfics #tarlos #911 lone star fanfiction #911 lone star

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lady-of-the-silver-lakeatron · 4 months

Text

Bridgerton Season 3 Episode 4 Initial Reactions

At last I am done and I can live in peace!

He brought a plant for her to enjoy indoors! This is the way to introduce a partner to your interests!

No Portia do not meddle leave the poor people alone.

Lady Arnold really said boy I do not need you to be cute I need you in bed bahahah

They're training a cute Pomeranian tricks!

"With much practice anything is possible" has the same energy as "Through incredible amounts of violence anything is possible"

OMG the caller isnt the Lord Samadani but best boy John!! Not Eloise hiding!

Francesca looks ready to eat him up!!

He is an Earl y'all! He's above a Viscount but below a Marquess! Like damn!

This scene is giving "woman on first date feels like she could spend whole life in uncomfortable silence with this man".

All these yappers are so confused about how happy they are/ Let them simply vibe within their auras!

John you're so good mannered! Best boy right here.

Penelope's dress looks like a princess dress it has a purple mist of fabric 10/10.

Portia stop perpetuating these ideas. No wonder your kids didn't know how to have sex!

You cannot make me feel bad for Cressida, nooo, stop

Okay Debling is such a green flag he doesn't belittle her interests and makes them equal to his own!

Ooh flirting by proxy!

Colin being so confused and horny that he goes back to have sex about it rather than discuss it. What a healthy strategy.

The Kilmarten's being reserved sounds just like the right place for "I don't like attention" Fran

Fran really expressing herself here!

"No I am not interested in him" bb girl your skirts are on fire

This Eloise- Cressida meeting is giving forbidden lesbian romance.

Lord Cowper can leave out of a window.

Not the 19th century frat boy speak -.-

Colin doesn't kiss and tell, good boy.

Portia stop thinking of yourself for once!

I know Portia is self-centered but she is right that Security is very important. This is an era where upper class ladies are kept from even learning how to cook and do basic house chores so without husbands this is a hard life to have.

Colin Angst!

Violet having an honest discussion about Colin's people pleasing nature is A+ parenting.

Violet you minx telling him about Penelope's potential engagement. She said I want a ginger daughter in law.

Queen Charlotte's wig! Girly you are wearing litcheral art!

Violet is nervous for the drama!

Flirting with Lady Danbury's brother and getting the lore!

The widowers moment was so emotional and beautiful I’m glad she has someone to chat with.

Lady Danbury what past life is haunting you??

Omg the lighting, the location, the framing, the outfits. This Eloise-Cressida scene looks like a romantic scene. Give me a lesbian love story you cowards!!

Give us a rebellious Romeo-Juliet story here. It would be a nice reward.

RIP Cressida you are about to be infodumped.

They speak in silence swoon.

John! I told y'all he is best boy he got her gift engaged with Fran’s special interest.

Fran said I have found my husband why waste time here any longer byees.

"She is not drinking the lemonade" was delivered with so much concern lol.

These two are actually a fun seeming couple, more of the Featherington couples!

Bad SexEd strikes again!

Colin: out of my way gay boys I'm about to get it!

He cut into the dance! The way everyone is watching this!

Debling is asking all of the right questions! He is speaking in fax I am so sorry Pen but marrying a man while pining for another is not right missy.

This was the politest break up.

Francesca looks so happy.

Carriage scene

I did not write much as the scene was quite captivating but damn' this was such a long episode how was it 2 hours long?

Also Local man finger fucks long time friend in carriage and decides they must be married at once.

Okay finally done editing these! Hope you enjoyed! I feel I must now re-read romancing Mr. Bridgerton while waiting for part II.

Nicola really gave such an amazing performance in the carriage scene because I could feel her apprehension, shock, fear, worry, excitement, and desperation the entire time. It was chefs kiss. Same to Luke hats off to him for giving some of the most memorable moments.

I think this episode tried to fix the Bridgerton issue where they have too many speaking scenes on after another like in the Season 2 finale so I am liking the pacing and such! I hope y'all have fun.

#bridgerton #bridgerton spoilers #spoilers #bridgerton season 3 bridgerton season three bridgerton s3 #bridgerton 3x04 #polin #polin bridgerton #nicola coughlan #cressida cowper #john stirling #francesca bridgerton #reaction

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taegularities · 1 month

Note

helloo!

i usually don't send in asks and am a silent reader but i seriously needed to send something for you because cmi is SUCHHH a masterpiece! i was initially waiting for it to be completed before reading, but i gave in (i'm currently in the middle of cmi: blue right now) and the chapters prior to that... WHEWWW THE ANGST HURT SO GOOD. i've been looking for that type of gut-wrenching and heartbreaking angst—and you definitely delivered :')

(the angst was so good i even have a song associated with this fic now—back 2 u (am 01:27) by nct 127. whenever i read this story, that song is ALWAYS playing in my head and this is the first time i've ever experienced this because i like to read in silence as it helps me focus HAHA).

i can't wait to see how the story unfolds as i continue reading and you continue uploading! i simply wanted to send in a message just to reaffirm that you are doing SO well; i've read so many of your works and they have never disappointed me—cmi is going to be one of my favorites, i know it 🤍 thank you again for gracing us with your beautiful words, plotline, character arcs, and everything in between! your hard work does not go unnoticed for sure :)

AH HELLO 😭 hehehe see y'all!!! those who are waiting for it to finish… i'm telling you join us for the ride, it'll be fun 👀 but seriously, i appreciate you so much. the angst phase was really heavy, but i'm sooo thrilled you loved it 😭 more angst to come!! :')

i don't listen to nct, but i gave the song a go and googled the translation, too and :') the monochrome feels… "But you're too much for me; cash, the diamonds and pearls, you are immersed in glamour" and "Should I answer your phone call that has now become too familiar? I worry about it again and again, I hesitate for a long time" help 😭

thank you for being here and reading. your reassurance means the world to me… i hope i keep staying not disappointing <3 and don't hesitate to reach out again – i know silent reading is easier, but this msg really made my day 🥺 and i'd loooove to know what you think of the rest of the story!! 🤍

#i love when ppl associate my stuff with certain songs and this hurtttt #notes for rid 🌹#anon #fic: colour me in

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lunapwrites · 1 year

Text

Minor writing gripe, and if you don't read or care about LTL in any capacity you will probably not have any frame of reference for this, but it may still be relatable to you if you write lol.

Anyway.

I DONE FUCKED UP. How, you ask? By dangling a very tasty treat in front of my readers by way of a ghost hunt that, apparently, does not wish to be written.

When I tell you that I have been trying. For the last three chapters. To make this fucking thing happen. I am literally losing my mind about it y'all you have no idea.

Because objectively! It's really cool! I have THOUGHTS about it! I've done a ton of research about the various creatures and beings and spirits that Remus and Sirius are trying to hypothesize about! They get BAT FUCKING WACKY with it! They are wracking their brains so hard they are losing sleep there is smoke coming out of their ears! If Sirius suggests a poltergeist one more time Remus might literally jump out the window (but nothing else makes sense!) (Does it Sirius? DOES IT??)

But does ANY of this actually want to make it out of my brain and onto the page? Nooooooooo.

Literally every time I have tried, I look at what I wrote, I go "thanks I hate it" and I stop writing for three weeks while I think about the sin I just sunned.

I just want to write them doing some nerdy bullshit but NO. Brain no likey. Brain wants them to focus on social problems instead which is FINE I GUESS but maybe I want them to do magic shit. Maybe I want to write Sirius wrestling a ghoul or something IDK. Maybe I want there to be some angst.

Instead, it keeps getting relegated to the background of every scene, and you get a quick mention (if that!) and plot continues happening.

So anyway the short version here is that I fell into the trap of mentioning something that The People have unilaterally indicated they wanted, but I apparently have no way to deliver on directly. And I'm sad about this, because I would ALSO like to read about the ghost hunt tbh. I just apparently can't fucking write it.

Anyway, it's not that the haunted house thing isn't important to the plot (it is) it's just that apparently writing it into something I don't hate is like nailing jelly to a tree. So I'm just gonna. Write around it and we'll see what happens I guess. RIP me and weeks of my life.

#lp talks #lp bitches #lp writes #allegedly #ltl #hp

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tricornonthecob · 1 year

Text

Nothing 600 MG of ibu can't fix

LK 117: Captain Quaaludes

(pt1)(pt2)(pt3)(pt4)(pt5)(pt6)

Ya girl was NOT expecting a traumadump.

She ships it.

Man they are really pushing the "Sarah is desperate for a Positive Female Role Model."

Have you ever been gazed at with admiration by a little girl and then she told you that you're really cool and a good role model before? I have. Its mildly terrifying and looks a little bit like this. Perhaps I am projecting my own experiences.

Y'all are entirely too cute rn we're gonna have to ask you to leave.

Me, thinking about all the white dudes throughout history but especially the 18th century named John:

Honestly I don't think we've ever seen Sarah this shy/quiet/awestruck before. She either really likes the Corbins, is really jonesing for a Surrogate Mom, or both. Maybe she also sees how cute the relationship the woman who looks a bit like her has with the blonde hunk who looks a little bit like other blonde hunks she's into and that is triggering some wistful thoughts. I will spin this into S/J content I stg.

oh my god STOP IT Y'ALL WE TOLD YOU ABOUT THE PDAS

lol holy shit is this grown man pouting.

...what exactly are y'all insinuating.

Captain Molly knows all about John's Pennsylvania 6 Pounder.

*vague hand gesturing* something something edutainment.

DIC: providing children with educational programming supplied by various Rugged Hunks.

....does she have a crush on John Corbin.

How are the Corbins not the most annoying couple in Fort Tryon.

You need to stop flexing that you trapped the cutest hunk your side of the Schuylkill.

Enough of the fluff, its time for more Hunks Delivering Edutainment

Which is deadly fucking serious and will absolutely ice a 70-year-old at sea, did we mention he's literally the best hope for America to court the French.

Please stop minimizing Influenza and take a break, Benji.

"Just curious!"

Sassing Benji Franx is just one of the many privileges of being Captain.

Just for giggles! :)

Benji you have the flu, get away from the splash zone.

The angst potential in the New York Campaign is off the charts tbh. Probably one of my favorite arcs in LK.

Yeah she will

Got your load right here

#liberty's kids #sarah phillips #Molly Pitcher #Margaret Corbin #amrev #tricorn on the cob watches LK and makes inane commentary #tricorn on the cob watches LK and spins S/J moments out of thin air #tricorn on the cob watches LK and reminds y'all that the flu is fucking serious shit #tricorn watches

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cryptidofthekeys · 1 year

Note

Im liking the idea with th real vampire streber that he feeds off of kevin after going too long without feeding

I like angst :)

Ya know, I AM a writer, y'all can ask and I'll deliver if I'm in the mood... And well, that probably won't happen in the actual Kev n Streb story I'm writing currently BUT!!!!

. . . :)

I'm not sorry for this by the way y'all <3

Btw quick heads up, in this lil mini-fic, Kevin does know Streber is a Vampire, the basic summary is that Streber feeds off Kevin when he REALLY shouldn't have (Kev puts a lil too much faith in Strebs sometimes :3)

btw idk who you are since your on anon but I hope you find this!!!

TW: Blood, Death, Angst, Grief

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Streber could feel it, the need... The need for blood building up, it's the only word his mind repeated over and over and over and over again... Streber had not fed in a long time now, he had been putting it off for far too long, he needed to go feed, because the urge was driving him insane...

-------------------------------------------

Streber quickly got up from his seat and began to walk, heading to the front door of his house and then when he opened it, he was greeted with Kevin who was about to knock and the vampire's eyes went wide with fear... "K-Kev?! Wh-What are you doing here s-so late...?!"

----------------------------------------------------

Kevin had flinched and froze when he was greeted with Streber at the door, he put his hand down and then spoke up "I uh, is this a bad time...?" And of course Streber just laughed nervously and shook his head "N-No! Not at all, come in, come in...!"

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Kevin didn't seem like he believed Streber and so he spoke up "...Are you okay...? You seem... On edge and..." And then Kevin blinked as he stepped inside and crossed his arms "...You forgot to feed again, didn't you...?"

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Streber fidgeted with his hands "N-Nooo....?" He grinned, showing off his sharp, pointed fangs that just extended like that and Kevin sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose "...Dude, Strebs... You can't do that, man, you can't just... Urgh..." There was a pause before Kevin looked into Streber's eyes with concern.

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"...I care about you, a lot, you know this Strebs... ...I love you, a lot, you know that as well, I don't want to see you just... Starving yourself like this, it's not good...!" Kevin noticed Streber look down, disappointed and then Kevin took a hold of his boyfriend's hand.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kevin sighed, knowing that Streber might've thought he was mad with him and he shook his head "...Strebs, I'm not... Mad at you, I just... I get worried about you sometimes, ya know? ...I get worried about you a lot actually, I don't like seeing you starve yourself"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Streber sighed "...I know, I know... I'm sorry for worrying you... ...F-For the record though, I was just about to go and feed, honest!" Streber tried to defend which was true and at least that got a bit of a smile from Kevin, although he could notice that Streber looked like he was getting more and more weak by the second... In fact...

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Kevin had ran over and quickly caught the vampire before he could fall over "S-Strebs...?!" Kevin called out to which Streber held a hand up "W-Woo boy... I-I'm fine, Kev... I-I just... I really need to go... feed..." Streber sounded woozy.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Kevin had thought about it and it's not like they hadn't before and so he moved the collar of his shirt down and then his hair out of the way and sighed "...Go ahead, you're too weak to even make it out the door"

----------------------------------------------------------

The vampire's eyes widened as he saw Kevin offer his neck, his fangs extended and his eyes glowed red, but then he quickly shook his head "I-I, K-Kevin no... I-I shouldn't..." Kevin rolled his eyes, just thinking Streber was being worried like usual "C'mon Strebs, it'll be fine, you've drank from me before ...I trust you ...And I love you"

---------------------------------------------------------------

Streber was going to protest again but the temptation was just too sweet... Streber couldn't resist it, his vampiric urges were too strong, he had been too long without feeding... And he physically couldn't restrain himself anymore, he had tried but... He just couldn't, the urges were too strong...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The vampire had fully stood and just leaned forward, sinking his fangs into Kevin's neck who flinched and cried out a bit.

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"D-Damn Strebs...! Chill! Th-that DOES hurt you know...!" Kevin scoffed, but his boyfriend didn't respond, only with a slight little hiss, and this part always felt weird to Kevin, to feel Streber drinking from him like this, he cringed a little at the feeling.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

...And after a bit like always, Kevin had motioned for Streber to stop, as he was beginning to feel a bit lightheaded "O-Okay Strebs, th-that's enough..." ...But... The vampire didn't stop, and so Kevin tried again, maybe thinking that Streber just didn't hear him the first time.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

And then at the third time, Kevin's eyes snapped open a bit "...S-Streber...?" Kevin's voice got a bit timid, and well his nerves didn't get soothed when all he got in response with a hiss from his vampiric boyfriend "S-Streber, th... That's enough..."

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Streber couldn't hear Kevin however, he was far too lost in this moment, his pupils were dilated at this point, he had been without blood for too long, and the vampire sighed in pure satisfaction at getting to taste blood again, he couldn't stop... He didn't want to stop, he needed more, his mind was feral right now, only telling him to drink, nothing else.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kevin was beginning to get scared now, as he tried to pry his vampiric boyfriend from his neck, but that just caused Streber to hold onto him, in a tight grasp that made Kevin yelp "S-Strebs... St-Stop, you-you need to stop..."

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The vampire just growled at that and attached himself to Kevin even more so, his fangs sunk deeply into Kevin's neck, not letting a singular drop of blood escape, Streber was practically in a frenzy as he kept greedily drinking the blood from Kevin's neck, he was far too gone to even hear his boyfriend's voice anymore...

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Kevin had tried to practically tear Streber from his neck but the vampire just wouldn't budge, and then of course because of how much blood Kevin was losing, he began to grow woozy, feeling even more lightheaded "...S-Streber..." Kevin's voice had grown weaker now "...P-Please... St-Stop..."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Streber couldn't hear anything but his own frenzied thoughts telling him to keep feeding, in fact in his frenzy he didn't even recognize that it was Kevin in front of him, and then eventually... Kevin had fallen limp, completely drained of his blood, and that's when the vampire unattached his fangs from the human's neck...

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...There was a pause, a pause as the vampire's frenzy began to die down now that his thirst was quenched fully, Streber sighed in delight and then he looked down ...And then, if the vampire had a heart that could stop, Streber's heart would have stopped beating immediately...

There was a flash in his eyes, as his eyes went wide in realizing who was now limp in his arms...

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Streber was unable to speak as wide, horrified eyes stared, darting all over his boyfriend's limp body, Streber's mouth was agape in shock and pure horror, he had quickly panicked and put his fingers to Kevin's neck ...The vampire didn't feel his boyfriend's pulse anymore...

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"K-Kev...?" Streber called out but Kevin didn't response, he called out his boyfriend's nickname again, and then the vampire began to shake Kevin a bit "K-KEVIN?! K-KEVIN! N-NO! NO PLEASE...!" Streber tried desperately to shake the human awake, trying anything and everything in a blind panic but... Kevin wouldn't wake up.

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The vampire wailed, he wailed his now deceased boyfriend's name into the night, Kevin's blood still trickling down his fangs, in fact when Streber had seen that, he placed a hand to his fangs and wiped them and his hands began to tremble furiously as he stared at Kevin's blood, that's when Streber realized finally and fully processed what he had done...

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Streber held Kevin tightly in his arms, crying, screaming, BEGGING and pleading desperately for his boyfriend to wake back up, he shook Kevin almost violently in an attempt to wake him up, the vampire was trying to deny it that Kevin had just passed out, he was almost in denial but no, he knew what he had done...

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"K-Kevin p-please, please... I-I'm sorry, n-no, I-I can't lose you... P-Please come back to me...! K-Kevin please, I-I'm sorry..." Streber began apologizing over and over again, he apologized, cried out Kevin's name, still begging him to wake up and then he finally finished by wailing Kevin's name in the night, mourning the loss of his boyfriend and blaming himself for Kevin's death...

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The vampire would never forgive himself for this, he would never be free from the guilt that would plague his mind... Streber had just drained his boyfriend of all his blood...

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I got tired at the end there lol also hope y'all like the angst ...And if not ...I can get so much worse <3

#The Cryptid's Writing #spooky month streber #spooky month kevin #candybats #tw blood #tw death #tw grief #tw angst #Real Vampire Au Streber #also to really hit home- just remember that Kevin's last words that Streber had actually heard was that Kevin trusted and loved him <3

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atherix · 2 years

Note

I am on the edge of my seat. I am voicing my panic out loud in a series of stressed noises. There is live commentary to my sister about the fight and Mumbo barely missing the first attack and Tubbo showing up and the idiot finally acknowledging Godling and Mumbo drinking his blood and them not calling Scar and AAAAHHH you are such an incredible author!!!

I’ve said how much I love this story, but I have to say it again. It is so so amazing. It always makes my day even if it is angsty. Thank you so much for sharing your stories <3

Scar is definitely going to be upset with them but also so relieved they all made it out safe (for now?) How will they get Blondie out of the house? Why did Tubbo decide to show up?(These are rhetorical, I’m sure we will find out). Oh and the lil messenger crow! I hope it made it out safe even though it’s mission got derailed.

Also Cleo and needing to formally register their coven is both exciting and stressful. I am curious what kind of annoying regulations they will be subjected to. But then Grian calling Mumbo ‘my Lord’ and them wanting Scar to move in so they can get more cuddles and be safe. As much as I adored Midnights Past, I have been so ready some more fluffy moments with Grian and Mumbo as well and you sure delivered <3

This was a lot of rambles but this chapter left my brain scrambled in the best way and I will continue to ponder it all evening.

You are chirping like Grian when Mumbo lay dying in his arms hmhmm- HKJFSKLFSJK THE LIVE COMMENTARY I love it kjfsdkfgdkn THANK YOU SO MUCH I AM 🥺SO GLAD YOU THINK SO hjkfdsjklfgsdjk <3 <3 <3

Thank you so much I am so glad you enjoy it so much, writing it has been an absolute joy I love the world I've made so much <3 I am so so so happy to share <3 ThaNK YOUU <3

Hmhmhmmmmm knowing what I know about what happens I cannot say one way or another how Scar or anyone will react hahaha <3 (Oh yes, you will learn. Both of them >:3 Especially Tubbo. Tubbo bby where did you come from hm hmmmm the dooRS WERE LOCKED jjmhmhmmm) I can confirm the messenger crow is safe it gtfo'd as soon as trouble began <3

I am glad everyone has picked up that anything involving the Council will be Irritating and Stressful and Not Fun (for the characters) hahaha <3 I'm actually looking forward to diving into the Council and Coven System stuff, tho I don't intend to lean tooo too heavily into it bc who cares about politics when there's a (fantasy) war on <3 Them wanting to bring all members of the Coven into the manor and just <3 They want Cuddles and to know he is Safe and Happy and Never Far Away just like a Lord's Mate rightfully should be, safe and protected and pampered hfsdfkjds

Midnights Past was super nice with all the fluff and light angst and was necessary for some certain setups later down the road but I too am glad to be back on the main plot, I am so excited to bring y'all Grian Lore and even a little more Mumbo Lore. After all, we still don't know anything about that ten years between being Turned and killing his Sire... :) Let me tell you this fic needing to be the next one written was a blow to me because I am in DESPERATE need of some Redscape, there is so little of it and I am like a hiker lost in a DESERT and I could only REFERENCE Redscape in this one because Scar isn'T HERE and I am HUNGRY someone FEED ME- Ahem anyway off topic, I am delighted to be back to being able to write the Grian and Mumbo fluff too <3 I missed my boys I want to write them being so in love and protective of each other and fskdjfjk <3 I am so happy you enjoyed <3

I LOVE the rambles and I love rambling in return thank you for it <3 My ask box is always open for a good ramble <3

#Ask #Midnight Series #Hermitshipping #Mumscarian

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khaleesiofalicante · 2 years

Note

To burn the witch is to admit that magic exists. ~ Erin Anastasia

Report? ✨Written✨

Notes? ✨Taken✨

Assignments? ✨Delivered✨

Work? ✨Done✨

Stability after this chapter? ✨Nonexistent ✨

Ok, yeah. I'm still missing some assignments and reading a book on one day, but it's an improvement!!!

“I just like that you are really smart and competent,” Alec said matter-of-factly. “So, it’s just like one big kink.” Can we really blame Alec??

For Lilith’s sake! Goddamn, this man!

Magnus crossed his arms. “What exactly are you insinuating, Alec?”

“Something is bothering you and I’d like you to talk to me about it,” Alec said gently.

I just love how Alec knows something is worrying Magnus with all the small details🥺 also yess!! Malec communicating and being an old married couple is>>>

His Blueberry has always been a little mad and a little desperate. That’s what made him Max.

Warlock math and Max was a dangerous combination.

Nico, I love you, babe, but Magnus is right!!!

“Okay,” Alec said again. “Is there something I can do?"

Alexander

This man ISTG- 😭😭

Not you too!!! I have enough couple angst, I don't need y'all to start fighting right now when my emotional stability depends on you!!😭😭

He had the face of a warlock. Idk what that is supposed to mean, but I am scared:))

Oh, so Claire was talking about schizophrenia!! But, like, did her family had schizophrenia, or did they have the sight??? I am confusion🙂

"Your son wouldn’t be trying to destroy someone else’s home if he felt safe in his own one.” He just called out the entire Devlin family and I love him for that 😎

Alec was still frowning. “Did he look familiar to you? He looked familiar to me.” oh shit. This is no good. I feel the foreshadowing in my bones!!! Or wait, was this about the time they met?? :o

Alec reassuring Jace💙💙💙

Look, I am shit worried about everything rn but Gabriel going feral is😍😍 I am just a simp for them don't @ me!!

You better watch out, Devlins!!! You mess with their kids, and Clary and Jace are ready to take you down!!! Although them in pain is just ten times worse 😭

Her beautiful, gorgeous, colorful hair😭😭 why do you always have to make her suffer, Dani??? Why????

A sword was a sword.

Lexi knew how to use one. She was going to show Marcus that.

Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fi-

At least Nico warned her just in time to learn how to heal herself... I have to take victories wherever I can ok?!?!

Need me more Gabriel and Jace's interactions!! It's not a want, ITS A NEED!!

“Chouchou,” she whispered again, leaning into David. “She wants Chouchou.”

“She?” Max said. “She who?”

Selena shuddered against David. “Mallory."

Fucking YESS!! I have been wanting this for weeks, holy shit I am so nervous but so excited for this!!!

At moments like this, Georgia did wonder if things would be easier if they just killed Marcus.

///

“Because he is an asshole with a god complex,” Gigi noted.

I agree with her wholeheartedly, morals out of the window!!

Is it really a shadowhunter date if you are not in danger?

“What does he want then?” Gigi groaned. “World domination? He isn’t Taylor Swift!” GIGI>>>>

THEY ARE THE MVP. THE ONLY ONES WITH BRAINCELLS. FAVE UNPROBLEMATIC BABES💙💙😍

Holy shit he is trying to collapse the ley lines on IDRIS WTF?!???

Oh god. Oh fuck.

Fucketty fucking fuck.

Exactly my thoughts 🙂🙂

“Hey! It’s not a fucking triangle!” Max yelled and pointed between him and David. “It’s a line. Okay? It’s just a damn line. No triangles here!” idk why I laughed so hard at this kdhdkdjdkdn

David told you!!!! And you didn't listen!!!!

“You okay?” dad asked.

“Why?"

“Because it sucks when other people get hurt because of us,” dad said.

Alec comforting Max is the only thing I will focus and I will ignore everything else :))

Alec when he hears Magnus: I am speed🔪🙂

That's it. How dare she touch Chairman Meow?!?!? I HATE HER SO MUCH IS UNREAL🔪🔪🔪

“I would kill someone for you,” Mallory smiled. “I love you.” *If I killed someone for you by Alec Benjamin playing in the distance*🎶🎶

“I will never kiss anyone other than David.” HEAR THAT??? HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU!!

David nodded. His face was blank.

Good. Stay away from me.

NOOOO, I NEED THEM TO TALK TO EACH OTHER, PLEASE I'M BEGGING 😭😭

“Do you me trust me with your son?” dad asked.

Uncle Jace smiled. “I trust you with my life."

Dad smiled back and looked at David. “Pack your bags, son. We’re going on a road trip."

Parabatai are just *SCREAMS*

So, so, soooo excited for this!!!

NOAHHH.

Dude, I have so many lbaf tiktoks I wanna share but for some reason my mobile tumblr app is not letting me share tiktoks when i am answering asks.

HOMOPHOBIA.

I miss you, bebe. Sending gay vibes (ignore the random shit my brain is overloaded these days)

#lbaf

4 notes · View notes

minghaoyoudoin · 2 years

Text

Deal - Part II

pairing: mafia boss!hyunjin x mafia boss!fem!reader

genre: angst, smut (minors, SCRAM!!), mafia au, enemies to lovers

words: 6k

warnings: dom!hyunjin, sub!reader, mentions of seasickness, mentions of alcohol, one of the characters is a misogynistic asshole, mentions of violence and hypothetical violence, hyunjin is a bit possessive hehe, jealousy, tension, making out, light marking, orgasm denial, rough sex (sorta?), body worship (also sorta), fingering, oral sex (f. receiving), begging, use of the color system, unprotected sex (🤨), multiple positions, a teaspoon of degradation, cuddling, cockwarming if you stare at it with your eyes crossed, some tense fluff at the end, and I'm sure I missed a few but oh well lol

a/n: BACK AT IT AGAIN Y'ALL!! please be aware that this is part TWO, I highly recommend reading part one first. thank you so much for your kind responses to the first part, I am endlessly thankful and, most importantly, am a simp for hyunjin (!!!) there are mature themes dealt with in this fic, readers please beware!

- also featuring jihyo of twice, everyone say hi jihyo!

- read part one here

- read part three here

You started the game. Hyunjin intends to finish it.

It was a general rule among people in your line of work that you didn’t send gifts unless you had an ulterior motive. A bribe, a threat, or an encoded message—sometimes a mix of the three. Those were the categories your late father had forced you to memorize in your youth.

The painting propped in front of you was no different.

It had been delivered three hours ago in an unmarked package. Now, it was in the center of your grand foyer, propped against a sculpture on the center table.

“What does it mean?” Jihyo asked from your left.

You examined the painted bouquet with a forced neutral expression, your head lightly inclined towards one shoulder, and you crossed your arms over your chest.

“The flower on the bottom left is my birth flower. Next to it, a red poppy for blood spilled in war.” You swallowed thickly and continued to the one on its other side, “That one is a daffodil, it’s… his birth flower. And the one on the right is a red dahlia for betrayal.”

Jihyo shuddered, obviously unnerved by the painting. “What’s the big one in the middle?”

You inhaled deeply, staring at the one you hadn’t explained. It was bigger than the previous four, positioned above the others in the center of the bouquet.

“I have no clue. Looks like jasmine, but I don’t know what it means. Maybe he ran out of ideas.” You rolled your shoulders as you spoke, attempting to dissolve some of the tension there. Jihyo glanced at you with a strange expression on her face, but mercifully said nothing. That was partly why she was still employed for you after all these years—she knew when to stop asking questions.

You changed the subject, attempting to force your voice into its usual cool command. “Is my dress ready?”

Jihyo nodded. “It’s upstairs. The gown is beautiful, you’ll look stunning.”

You hoped so. You needed every weapon in your arsenal at its best tonight, and your beauty was one of them.

Unfortunately, insufferable old men were more willing to empty their pockets if your tits looked great.

Jihyo’s phone rang. She offered you a quick, apologetic smile and strode further into the house, her heels clicking on the marble tile. Aside from being your friend, you were grateful for her as an employee. She handled much of the business since you’d assumed control of the Family, allowing you to focus on the part you liked. The dirtier bits.

You gazed at the jasmine painted above the four smaller flowers. It had been crafted with far more care than the others, more detail. You could almost picture Hyunjin in your mind’s eye, painting this for you in the late hours of the night.

You had lied to Jihyo. You knew exactly what the jasmine symbolized, but to voice it aloud would have been an unnecessary risk.

Passion. Sex. Desire.

Leave it to Hyunjin to spill the beans about your… altercation two weeks ago while simultaneously declaring war.

You supposed it was understandable. After all, you had stolen one hundred million dollars’ worth of forged documents from his bedroom after fucking him senseless.

You hadn’t seen him since. Hadn’t even heard anything about him until this painting was delivered. Though it was unsigned and delivered without the official seal of his Family, it wasn’t hard to deduce the artwork’s origin.

Unable to stomach looking at the thing anymore, you placed it face-down on the table and stepped away. There were more important things to worry about tonight than Hwang Hyunjin’s hurt feelings.

The gift certainly sent the message he’d intended it to. To normal people, it would probably just look like a tasteful rendition of a bouquet; to those in this business, it was an obvious threat from one rival to another. But to you, one of the few people in this world who knew Hyunjin behind the mask, it was more.

You and Hyunjin had always preferred the language of flowers. And after two weeks of silence, the flowers were speaking.

See you soon.

“If you vomit, I’m going to push you overboard.”

You shot a dubious glare in Jihyo’s direction, your forearms braced on the metal railing. It was a mistake—the second you looked away from the small green light you’d been using as a stationary object across the bay, a wave of nausea rose in your stomach.

“You do that—” you cut yourself off, momentarily closing your eyes while you mastered your need to hurl. After a moment, you began again, “If you do that, I’m seriously gonna—” Your sentence was interrupted by a hiccup.

Okay, maybe talking wasn’t your best option right now.

Jihyo giggled. “Now would you let me put a seasickness patch on you? I said you would need one before we even got on this yacht, but nooo—”

“What’s that boat?” You abruptly asked. Jihyo followed your line of sight to the small yacht that was pulling up alongside the one you stood on. It was probably a quarter of the size, meant for speed rather than luxury entertainment.

“I heard someone talking about selling their share of the papers after they bought them from us.” Jihyo peered at the smaller boat as it drifted closer to the boarding deck. “Probably the buyer.”

Your eyes narrowed. “Figure out who it is. I don’t want to be surprised.”

Jihyo nodded wordlessly and gestured for one of your guards to do as you’d asked. They stepped away, phone pressed to their ear.

When another hiccup nearly brought your outrageously expensive dinner with it, you hastily beckoned for Jihyo to put the damn seasickness patch on you. Thankfully, she did so without commentary.

You touched the small patch behind your ear, more than a little skeptical. You had no idea how this thing was supposed to work, but you didn’t feel like biting the hand that fed you. Anything that would help you get through the next twelve hours on this godforsaken boat was good enough for you.

“Do you think it’s late enough for me to hide in my suite without raising suspicions?” You asked, not bothering to hide the edge of desperation in your voice.

Jihyo offered a pitying smile. No, then.

“Ugh, why?” You let your forehead fall against the metal railing, appreciating its cool temperature. “We already sold the papers, we’re a hundred million dollars richer—what more do they want from me?”

You were already upset enough that you had to spend the night on this yacht. The buyers you’d found for the tax documents were a reclusive CEO of some tech company and his board of trustees, whose one condition for setting up the deal had been that it be on their turf. In your impatience to sell, you’d hastily agreed.

Now you were seasick on a boat at one in the morning while the exclusive party went on inside.

“I think Mr. Chae wants to sleep with you. He was looking for you after dinner.”

You laughed humorlessly. “That’s great. How disappointingly stereotypical of him.”

Jihyo knew without you explicitly saying. You would not have sex with the man in his fifties tonight. Not only was the age difference not your thing, but he wasn’t—

Nope.

You halted your thoughts with an iron grip. You would not go down that road tonight.

You straightened, smoothing your silk gown onto your sides. Your friend had been right—it looked beautiful. The smooth fabric was a shimmering gold, excess silk pooling at your breasts but skintight around your waist and hips. The skirt swished around your legs as you stepped back from the railing and sighed.

“I won’t entertain these bastards. We got what we came for.” Jihyo nodded tightly as you spoke. You were certain that the energy indoors was as uncomfortable for her as it was for you. “We’ll make small talk as we walk, but I intend to be in bed in the next ten minutes.”

You strode to the glass doors with your chin held high, piecing back together your aura of casual dominance. It helped that the five trained bodyguards you’d brought with you tonight immediately fanned into a diamond formation around you as you walked.

People in various levels of finery milled around inside, chatting amongst themselves. You offered fake gentle smiles to anyone who dared make eye-contact with you. That was your favorite game to play—let them guess why the young, pretty girl was called the Viper Queen.

“There you are!”

You stopped in your tracks and mentally groaned at the booming voice that spoke from behind you. You took a moment to stitch a friendly smile onto your face before you turned.

“Mr. Chae, how are you?” You greeted pleasantly.

The man approached with the grace of an elephant, very obviously drunk. A sheen of sweat sparkled on his forehead, the gray in his hair yellowed by the artificial light. Your guards looked at you when the man shoved between them and you made a hand signal against your hip. Allow it but be ready.

“I was wondering where you went, little bird.” His eyes shone with intent and you fought the urge to vomit again, though not from seasickness. “You had me thinking you just came here for my money.”

“Perhaps I did.”

Though you meant what you said, Mr. Chae laughed. If you wouldn’t have been immediately shot for it, you would have kicked him in the shin.

“Are you enjoying my boat?”

A wave rocked the floor beneath you and your stomach twisted. “It’s lovely. How’s your wife?”

His expression sobered a bit at your pointed mention of the wife he’d conveniently forgotten about. He spoke, but his response was lost on you when Jihyo suddenly gripped your elbow.

You glanced at her, then did a double-take at the alarm on her face.

“What is it?” You whispered.

“I found out who was on the other boat, it’s—”

Your eyes lifted over her shoulder and the entire world fell from beneath your feet.

Shit.

Hyunjin’s hair was slicked back, the blond wonderfully offsetting his black ensemble as he stepped into the main room. He was so tall that he had to stoop to get through the doorframe, and under different circumstances you might have laughed at the tell-tale annoyance that bracketed his mouth. The blood drained from your face at the seven other bodies that followed his. He’d brought his entire Family.

Hyunjin’s dark eyes immediately found yours.

He smiled.

You couldn’t convince your feet to move as Hyunjin crossed the room with predatory grace, the throng of people parting to let him pass. The others followed close on his heels and you fought the desire to look at your old friends’ faces.

Your guards immediately lined up shoulder to shoulder, a human shield between where you stood and Hyunjin made to approach further.

His smirk made your heart clench as he looked down at you between your guards’ heads.

“Hello, thief.”

“Hi, bastard.”

Your attention was drawn away from Hyunjin’s savage smile by Mr. Chae’s voice, buzzing in your ear like an annoying fly.

“Mr. Hwang, what an unexpected pleasure. Come to join the festivities?”

Hyunjin didn’t look away from you as he responded, “Unfortunately not. I’ve come to collect something which belongs to me.”

“Oh?”

Jihyo’s hand clasped your elbow again, subtly urging you to run. You were inclined to listen. Hyunjin was about to reveal your deceit, you could tell by the glimmer in his eyes and the slight quirk to his full lips.

Whatever response you might have expected, the one-word answer he gave was the furthest thing from it.

“Her.”

All the oxygen left the room as you sucked in a shallow gasp. Mr. Chae barked an incredulous laugh.

“Her?” His beady eyes darted from Hyunjin to you, then back again. “She is a guest on my boat tonight, we just closed a deal not two hours ago—”

“A deal that was only possible because of me.” Hyunjin interrupted, his eyes at last shifting to the older man looming behind your shoulder. He looked down at him, his eyes narrowed with distaste, like he could see exactly why Mr. Chae wanted to keep you from leaving so soon.

You waited for Hyunjin to continue with bated breath. The moment he revealed that the tax documents had been stolen, it was anyone’s game. An exchange of money didn’t matter where guns were involved—whoever was left standing at the end would walk away with everything.

And Hyunjin’s Family always won.

To your surprise, he didn’t elaborate on his so-called involvement in the deal. “She and I have business to attend to. I trust you understand my urgency.”

Mr. Chae blubbered for a moment, unable to find a good enough reason to keep you by his side. You almost wished he would. The second Hyunjin got you alone, he was going to kill you for stealing from him.

At last, you mastered yourself enough to speak. “Mr. Chae, I believe it’s time for me to take my leave.” You ignored Hyunjin completely as you looked at the older man, frustrated color rising in his cheeks. “Thank you for your hospitality, it’s been a pleasure. My men and I can find my suite on our own.”

Hopefully your addition of my men would keep him from following you to your room.

Mr. Chae seemed to deflate, obviously disappointed. “Sleep comfortably, little bird.”

Nausea rose within you again at his ridiculous pet name for you. Hyunjin visibly tensed in your periphery.

You nodded, hoping your intentions didn’t show on your face. You certainly would not sleep comfortably tonight. The second you got to your room, you intended to climb out the window and flee before Hyunjin could find you.

Mercifully, he didn’t move to stop you as you walked around him. A wave of his cologne passed over you, so familiar that it made your knees weak.

You tried and failed not to look at Hyunjin’s friends. Some wouldn’t look at you, but Changbin was grinning like he had half a mind to bash you over the head again. In your effort to look away, you accidentally made eye-contact with Felix.

He’d been your best friend, once upon a time—now he was looking at you with poorly concealed sadness and hurt in his eyes. Like he truly missed you.

You forced yourself to keep walking, Jihyo pressed close to your side.

“Where the hell is the fastest exit in this place?” You hissed the moment you were out of sight. Your men fanned out to secure a perimeter, attempting to keep others away while you made your escape.

“I don’t know. I already sent an SOS to our guys on land, they’re coming as fast as they can.” Jihyo was breathless, whether from fear or walking so fast, you didn’t know. “I think we’ll have to stay in your suite until they get here, but it could be a while.”

“Why?”

“We don’t own a speedboat.”

You wanted to kick the wall. How was it possible that you didn’t own a speedboat?

You shoved your panic down. “Fine, but you can’t stay in my room with me. If he gets in, he’ll kill anyone in the way.”

“I can’t just leave you—”

“You can.” You tugged Jihyo to a stop for a moment, glancing around. By some stroke of luck, the hallway was empty except for the two of you.

You hastily pulled a stack of checks out of your gown. Each was attached to a different bank—separate accounts which had simultaneously paid you ten million dollars each.

You pressed the checks into Jihyo’s hand. “Take these, find my guards and stay out of sight. If I’m not with you when the boat gets here, get on it and leave, do you understand me?”

There were tears in Jihyo’s eyes, but thankfully she nodded her understanding.

“Is he going to kill you?”

In truth, you didn’t know. You weren’t inclined to find out.

You gave her a smile that felt more confident than you actually were.

“He can try.”

When you opened the door to your suite, Hyunjin was laying on your bed.

You stared at each other for a moment without speaking.

“I should have known you’d be in here.” You said at last. You stepped into the room and closed the door softly behind you. “Where are your friends?”

“Socializing.”

Chills ran up your spine at the low sound of his voice. He was angry, that much was obvious, but you couldn’t figure out why he was just lying there. His gun should have gone off already.

“How did you find me?”

“Felix has a lot of friends.” Hyunjin interlaced his fingers over his stomach and sighed. “Did you really think I wouldn’t come for you?”

You scoffed under your breath. “You already came for me, Jin.”

Hyunjin’s face hardened. He stood slowly and you lifted your chin, making no move to run as he approached. If he was going to kill you, you would die with your dignity intact.

He stopped when there was less than a breath between you.

“You stole from me.”

“And?”

Goosebumps followed his hand as his fingers trailed up your arm, his touch so light you could barely feel it.

“Were you going to let him fuck you?” He breathed.

Shock broke through your indifferent expression. “Who?”

“Mr. Chae.”

Ah, that’s what this is about. Hwang Hyunjin, leader of one of the most feared organizations in the world and a harbinger of death, was jealous.

You couldn’t stop the small smile that spread across your face as Hyunjin leaned in until his face was inches from your throat. Your heartbeat picked up when his warm breath fanned across your neck.

“So what if I was?” You said quietly.

Hyunjin tensed and his hand stopped its slow exploration of your arm at your shoulder. He leaned away to look at you, his eyes glittering.

“Were you?”

You tilted your head back. Your lips were close enough that if you moved at all, they would brush.

“I think you know me better than that.” You allowed your hands to rest softly on his waist, bunching his coat in your fists as he exhaled shakily. “Jealousy is below you.”

His fingers ghosted over your jaw. “I don’t respond well to others taking the things I want.”

“And if I did want to fuck the old man?” Your hand drifted across the front of Hyunjin’s dress pants. Vicious delight drew your lips into a small smile when you discovered he was already half-hard.

You were playing with fire. No, not playing—you were dancing in the middle of a blaze, daring the flames to burn you.

A shallow gasp passed Hyunjin’s lips when you ran a fingernail over the clothed length of him.

“I would get violent.”

“Prove it.”

Your dare hadn’t even finished sounding when his mouth crushed against yours. He kissed you feverishly, like he meant to consume you alive, and you met him stroke for stroke. Hyunjin’s tongue entered your parted lips immediately, exploring and marking like he wanted the taste of him in your mouth forever.

Your fingernails raked across his back, through his hair, drawing short groans from his throat. You savored them all—the sounds Hyunjin made were among your favorite in the world.

Hyunjin grasped your bare leg through the slit in your dress and you gasped at the cold temperature of his hand. His fingers dug into your thigh as he yanked your leg up around his waist, forcing your hips to press flush against his.

You ground against his length immediately. You were already soaking, your lace panties sticking to your core. You had been since you’d seen him in your bed, if you were being honest.

Hyunjin shuddered as you rocked your hips against him again.

“You always run from me,” he said into your mouth. He effortlessly picked you up off the ground and you froze, but he immediately turned and dropped you onto the bed. “Why do you always run? Is it for this?”

Hyunjin removed your heels from each of your feet and kissed your left ankle, trailing his lips up your calf to your knee. He bit down softly on your thigh and you moaned breathily.

You might have burst into flames at the dark lust in his eyes as he murmured against your hip, “Is it because you want to be punished?”

You squirmed while he kissed one of your hipbones, then the other. Hyunjin hooked his long fingers into your panties and dragged them down your legs.

“I kept these last time, you know.” He placed your panties on the foot of the bed and dragged his lips up your leg again, his fingernails scraping lightly behind his mouth. “I thought about sending them with the painting.”

“The painting was lovely.” You gasped out. You were so desperate for him to touch you that you wanted to scream.

“Was it?” At last, Hyunjin pressed two of his fingers to your soaking entrance. “I wanted to kill you while I did it.”

You couldn’t bring yourself to be upset by his words when his fingers roughly pushed into you. You exhaled a shaky groan and Hyunjin pressed an open-mouthed kiss to your stomach, gently sucking your skin where your dress had hitched up.

You could feel his eyes on you, watching your every reaction while you writhed beneath his touch. You massaged your breasts through your gown and half-wished he would just rip the damn thing off you.

Your only warning before Hyunjin’s mouth closed around your clit was the feeling of his warm breath on you. You arched your back involuntarily at the dual sensations of his fingers and lips, the former now curling inside you to brush your g-spot on every thrust.

Hyunjin groaned and murmured something into you about your taste. He splayed the fingers on his free hand across your stomach, holding your hips against the mattress. The vibrations of his voice drew another moan from your chest and you reached down blindly to grasp whatever part of him you could reach.

Your hand found his. Hyunjin stilled momentarily when your fingers hastily threaded through his, but he quickly mastered his surprise and gripped yours with equal strength.

You couldn’t dwell on the intimacy of that action. Your rapidly approaching orgasm clouded your mind—if you didn’t cum soon you would go insane.

“God, Hyunjin—ah—pleasepleaseplease—”

You babbled nonsensically, arching your back as his fingers continued mercilessly pumping inside you. Your walls spasmed around him and he moaned again at his realization that you were already close.

The wave inside of you was just beginning to break when Hyunjin withdrew his fingers from you completely.

Your eyes snapped open. Your vision was a little blurry, your head clouded with the orgasm that had just been ripped out from under you.

“What—why, no—”

“You don’t get to cum, baby. Not yet.”

Your fury was short-lived. Hyunjin’s fingertips dug into your thighs as he jerked them onto each of his shoulders, his hands cupping your ass while he dove in again.

You released a vulgar moan when his tongue replaced his fingers. The tensed muscle thrusted into your entrance, eagerly consuming your arousal as you climbed higher again.

You were so sensitive. You straddled the line between pleasure and pain, your legs violently shaking around Hyunjin’s head while his tongue moved to circle your clit.

That sinful mouth closed around you and sucked hard, yanking you to the edge of your orgasm so fast you saw stars.

You threaded your fingers into Hyunjin’s hair, tugging at the soft strands with newfound urgency. Your hips rolled against his mouth while you chased your high, close, so close—

Hyunjin removed his lips from you again with a lewd pop.

You couldn’t even raise your head to look at him this time. Your chest rose and fell in heavy breaths, and you fought the urge to scream a frustrated cry.

“Color?” Hyunjin’s voice rang with smug command.

“Green, you asshole.”

He climbed up your body slowly, stopping briefly to kiss your hip, your ribcage, each of your breasts, before his face hovered above yours.

Hyunjin softly kissed your neck while you dragged your fingernails along his shoulder blades, aiming more to tell him to hurry up than hurt him. He froze when his lips touched below your ear.

“Is this a seasickness patch?” He whispered incredulously, his shoulders shaking with silent laughter.

You smacked him gently, your cheeks flushing with unwelcome embarrassment.

“Shut up, Jin. I can still hurt you in this position.”

He chuckled again and moved down so he could suck a hickey onto the column of your throat. You moaned softly, instantly reminded of the incessant ache for him between your legs.

“How do you feel?” He whispered against your mouth. You caught his lips in a fervent kiss, painfully turned on by the taste of yourself lingering on him while you tugged on his bottom lip with your teeth.

“Like I’m dying,” you breathed.

Hyunjin’s arm slid beneath you and flipped you onto your front. You arched your back, pressing your ass into his hips while his long fingers deftly pulled down the zipper of your gown. It fell down your shoulders and you adjusted to help him slide it out from beneath you.

He planted rough kisses along your spine, working his way up until his lips closed around the rapid pulse in your neck.

“That’s how I feel every time I look at you.” Hyunjin’s words were accompanied by the sounds of his clothes falling to the floor. You squirmed in anticipation, more than ready to be full. There was nothing like being filled by Hyunjin—no matter what feelings there were outside of this, it was like his body had been perfectly crafted for yours.

He bent over you, his bare chest warm as it pressed against your back. His breath fanned across your ear while he dragged the head of his cock between your folds, coating it with your slick.

“Every time I see you, it breaks my heart.” Your heartbeat pounded between your legs while Hyunjin spoke, impossibly hot and aching. “And for some reason, I keep coming back.”

At last, he pushed in. And in, and in. You both released simultaneous sighs of relief and your head fell against your forearm braced below you.

“I can’t stay away from you.”

He worked his way in slowly until his hips were pressed flush against your ass. You felt him so deep, the feeling was intoxicating. He thrusted, just barely, and your walls clenched around him at the stimulation to your g-spot.

Without warning, Hyunjin pulled out to the tip and slammed back in. You cried out when he did it again, the pleasure so overwhelming that you felt it in your toes.

He set a brutal pace, his forehead falling between your shoulders while his hands braced your ribcage. Your fists twisted the sheets on either side of you so hard your knuckles paled under the strain.

“Whose pussy is this?” He demanded, breathless.

Your brain could barely function long enough to respond. “Yours.”

His hips snapped against yours, the loud sounds of your bodies joining creating a symphony with your panting breaths. One of Hyunjin’s hands found yours, his fingers threading between your own in a desperate attempt to ground himself.

“Who’s the only one who can make you feel this good?��

“You—ah, god—You, Hyunjin.”

You were rising and rising without an end in sight. Your walls were clenching furiously around his cock—if you continued like this, neither of you would last a minute.

Hyunjin pulled out and turned you onto your back again, his cock buried inside you before you had the chance to mourn its absence. He placed your ankles on either side of his head and braced his hands on the backs of your thighs.

“Oh god, oh god—Hyunjin, I’m—ah—”

“Yes, yes—come for me.” He panted, sweat beading on his forehead as he pounded into you. He looked beautiful. Maybe it was the pleasure talking, but surely there was no boy more beautiful in the world than this one. “Come on, baby, I need to see it. Want to see how you’re a slut for me. Need to feel you—”

Hyunjin’s fingers found your clit, rubbing expert figure-eights onto it while he watched you beneath pinched brows.

You fell off the edge. Plummeted off of it.

Perhaps it was because it had been denied so many times, but your orgasm felt like fireworks in your veins. You scrunched your eyes closed, unable to make a sound as a wave of euphoria crashed into you.

Your body locked. The only muscles able to move were those inside you, clamping down so hard around Hyunjin’s cock that he released a guttural moan.

“That’s it, that’s it—just like that…” Hyunjin coaxed you through it, gasping between words. Your legs shook on his shoulders, twitching in tandem with the pulses of your orgasm.

Hyunjin released a shuddering breath as he came inside you, pushed to his own release by the never-ending tightening of your walls around him. Your bodies responded to every twitch and throb, drawing out each of your orgasms so long that you began to shake with overstimulation.

After what felt like an eternity, Hyunjin gingerly removed your legs from his shoulders and settled down at your side, his softening cock still nestled inside you. His long arms wound around your waist, tugging you against him firmly enough that you knew he had no intention of releasing you.

You were too fucked out to care, really. Cuddling after sex like that was probably a terrible idea, but this was… Hyunjin.

Tears pricked behind your eyes at the thought.

It was Hyunjin buried inside you. Every time you saw him, you either wanted to kill someone or fuck him within an inch of his life. Sometimes both.

You had wanted to spend the rest of your life with him, once. Before each of your fathers had died, before you started blaming one another for things that were completely out of your control—you had loved him.

Maybe you still did.

“That’s twice now you’ve fucked instead of killed me.” You didn’t mind that your voice was shaky. Hyunjin had seen you in far worse states than this. Perhaps he’d think it was because of how mind-blowing the sex had been.

He leaned back and you winced at the overstimulation when his cock moved inside you. Hyunjin gazed down at your face, the look in his eyes far different than before, and his head slanted towards his shoulder.

“I didn’t come here to kill you.”

Your brows furrowed, confused. “Then why?”

Hyunjin didn’t answer right away, and you started to hope he wouldn’t. There was a very fragile bubble of peace surrounding you at the moment, ready to pop at the first sign of danger.

He considered his words carefully, his eyes drifting over each part of your face like he was searching for an answer there.

“I came to ask you to marry me.”

Pop.

“You… what?” Your lips parted, the shock so powerful that your brain short-circuited. “But you hate me. I’m supposed to hate you. I stole a hundred million dollars from you.”

You surprise intensified when Hyunjin’s smile grew. He pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead that you didn’t process in time to deflect.

“Ah, there are the key words. Supposed to. You don’t hate me at all, do you?”

You were too dumbfounded to respond. At last, you disentangled yourself from him, momentarily mourning the sensation of being full when his cock slid out of you.

“Hyunjin, what you’re saying is impossible.”

“We’re two of the most powerful people in the world. Anything is possible.”

Your throat worked as you thought of what to say. Less than an hour ago you’d been convinced Hyunjin would murder you for your theft.

“But I stole from you.”

“Did you?” Hyunjin raised an eyebrow.

“What?”

“Did you steal from me, or did I let you take the papers?”

You scoffed. No way. He had to be bluffing.

“Why would you let me take a hundred million dollars out from under you?”

Hyunjin sat up, his toned body near-glowing in the moonlight filtering in through the window.

“I knew the moment I saw you again that my feelings hadn’t changed,” he began. “Even when I still thought you murdered my dad, I knew I wanted to marry you. And I hated you for that—I hated myself even more. I thought you killed my father as revenge, but somehow you still made me love you.”

You listened in silence, hardly daring to breathe as he continued, “When I found you in my club, when you leaned into the barrel of my gun like a maniac, when we… you know, afterwards.” Hyunjin cleared his throat, color dusting his cheeks. “It was the only thing on my mind. I would find a way to convince you to marry me without the world imploding.”

You sat, thunderstruck, for several breaths, hardly able to believe the words you were hearing. Marry him? Once, you would have leapt at the chance, but now… things were complicated. The world you lived in was stacked against you.

“You don’t have to answer right now.” Hyunjin said, no doubt because of the expression on your face. “Take time to think on it, if you need. But aside from the fact that I’m hopelessly in love with you, consider how much we stand to gain by uniting our empires. We’d be far more powerful together than apart. That is why I was so willing to let you take the documents. Let’s call it an investment.”

The part about merging your Families… was true, you supposed. At the moment, at least, you couldn’t find a good enough rebuttal.

Your phone buzzed inside your gown, rumpled on the floor by the bed. Some of the tension was broken by the sound and you reached for it, finally managing to locate it inside one of the hidden pockets.

It was a text from Jihyo:

Boat is here. We’re not leaving without you.

A second later, another text came through:

Please don't be dead.

You sighed and stood, slowly shimmying back into your gown. Hyunjin helped you zip up the back, pressing a gentle kiss to your shoulder before releasing you.

You watched while he tugged on his pants, feeling a little lost as to what you were supposed to do now. What were you going to tell Jihyo? If you decided to turn down the proposal, were you expected to go back to your normal life and pretend he never happened?

You weren’t sure you could do that.

Apparently attuned to your spiral of thoughts, Hyunjin bent slightly at the waist to look you in the eye. “Think on it.”

It was all you could do to nod.

When you opened the door, Changbin stood on its other side. He grinned at whatever Felix had said a moment ago, and he only had time to glance down at you for a moment before you advanced.

Your fist collided against his cheek with a resounding thwack. Silence fell, broken only when Hyunjin released a startled laugh in the doorway behind you.

“That’s for two weeks ago, you prick.”

You strode away without waiting for his response, your chin held high as you shook the pain out of your hand.

Changbin’s laugh followed you down the hall and he called after you, “Good to have you back, Viper Queen.”

You didn’t miss the sarcastic tone that accompanied your so-called “title”, but it didn’t sound like he was trying to hurt your feelings. It was… the way a friend would tease another friend. It felt like old times.

God, you really should have just gone to Fiji.

would you like a side with your simp sandwich? I know I need one lol. would a part three be okay? anywayyyy, I hope this lives up to your expectations for part two! thank you so much for reading!! please like/reblog if you enjoyed it, bye loves! - j

part three here!masterlist here :)

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ladylannisterxo · 2 years

Note

💌 73. "Stop being a fucking prick." - with Steve please babe :) hit me where it hurts!

Well... you asked, I delivered. This is just straight up angst and I did it all for you!! 😘 Read part two here!!

Pairings; Steve Harrington x fem!Reader Prompt # 73; "Stop being a fucking prick." Words; 1.1k Warnings; ANGST, just angst! I'm sorry y'all!

The party had been a bust. It wasn’t initially, you were having fun but Steve didn’t want to go in the first place and things took a nasty turn as the night progressed. Now you’re here, alone with him in his car as he drives you back home, a deafening silence closing in around you.

Steve is staring straight ahead, both hands gripping the steering wheel as if it’s the only thing keeping him grounded. It’s very unlike him and it makes your heart constrict in your chest; usually his hand is resting on your thigh and you’re playing with his fingers while he smiles at you like he doesn’t have a care in the world. But not tonight. He’s barely glanced your way since you got in the car.

“Are we gonna talk about this?” You ask gently, getting a feel for the emotions radiating off of him.

“Talk about what?” It’s short, clipped. He still doesn’t look at you.

“About what happened back there,” you say, “about how you dragged me out of there like a father scolding his child. It was embarrassing, Steve.”

He scoffs, hand rubbing across his face, like this entire night has depleted five years off of his lifespan. He looks down, fiddles with a couple knobs, and then the radio is crackling to life with one of those synth pop songs that is getting way too much radio play. His eyes land back on the road ahead, he continues to ignore you.

“No,” you say sharply, turning the radio off and basking the car in endless silence, “you don’t get to do this, not tonight. What the hell happened back there, Steve?”

Steve turns his eyes on you then and they’re cold, dark, so unlike the warm and inviting eyes that you’ve come to know. You shift in your seat. This isn’t your Steve.

“You tell me,” he says with a bitter laugh, “you’re the one getting all cozy with any guy who offers you a smile.”

“Excuse me?” The implication stings and you begin to feel tears prick at the corners of your eyes. “Scott was just being nice, Steve. Okay? I had been drinking all night and I wanted a bottle of water, he found me one. That’s it. This isn’t- this isn’t you, Steve.”

“And now I suppose you’re gonna tell me who I am—”

“—Stop being a fucking prick!”

Your voice is loud, too loud and it echoes around the enclosed space. He jumps at the unexpected volume, eyes widening as he looks to you and then the road and back again.

“Pull over,” you instruct.

“Baby, I—”

“Pull. Over.”

He does as you command, coming to a complete stop and shutting off the engine. You clamber out of the car, slamming the door with such ferocity, it shakes a bit and Steve’s eyes widen even more. You set off down the road toward your house but you can hear Steve climbing out of the car, running to catch up, and then he grabs your arm and spins you back toward him.

“What are you doing?” He asks, voice high and frenzied.

“This is about me going off to school, isn’t it?” You inquire, jerking your arm out of his grasp. “I didn’t want to believe it but you’ve been pulling further and further away from me ever since you found out I was going out of state.”

“That’s not- I’m- no, that’s not true.”

“Steve, come on,” you exasperate, “you’ve been like this for months. You could- you could barely be happy for me when you found out, I could see it, but I thought it was just an adjustment. And then we graduated and it got worse and now it’s like you’re constantly questioning every single move I make. Just- just admit it, Steve.”

“Admit what?” His voice is barely above a whisper and he looks so small standing before you.

“That you don’t trust me.”

“No I- baby, I do!”

“You don’t,” you bite and he flinches back from your anger, “if you did, nothing that happened tonight would have happened.”

You laugh bitterly, hands rubbing against your face fiercely as your hair billows wildly in the summer wind. Steve thinks you look like one of those beautiful, ethereal creatures he often sees painted across the glossy pages of Dustin’s D&D books. He winces at how far out of hand this has all gotten.

“Listen, baby, I—”

“—Why don’t we call this what it is, Steve.”

Steve’s eyes widen at your monotone voice and it feels like someone has punched straight through his chest and ripped his heart out, crushing it right before his eyes.

He gulps. “And what is it?”

“Over,” you say and you turn your gaze to the road beneath your feet. “It has been for a while now, I just didn’t want to admit it. I mean, I- I can barely do this with you now, what are we gonna do when I’m hundreds of miles away?”

“We can- we can make it work,” he says urgently, stepping forward and pulling you against his body. His hands cup your face and he kisses you softly before resting his forehead against yours. His eyes are alight with the warmth you’ve been missing for months.

“We’ve been trying to make it work, Steve,” you whisper, untangling yourself from his grasp and pulling away with a shuddering breath. “I love you, I will always love you but I can’t- I won’t do this with you anymore.”

“No,” he whispers, breath catching on unshed tears, “baby, no, we can- I can fix this.”

“Maybe one day we can find our way back to each other, but…,” you taper off, not sure where you want the rest of that sentence to go. You steel yourself, take a deep breath, and then glance back up into his wide, broken, pleading eyes. “I’m gonna walk home, please don’t follow me.”

And to your surprise, he doesn’t, he lets you go. You refuse to turn back, knowing if you do, you’ll catch sight of those beautiful eyes or that playful smile and you’ll run right back into his arms. You have half a mind to do so.

Steve doesn’t get back into his car immediately. Instead, he chooses to watch you walk away, from him, from your relationship, from the future he had all mapped out for the two of you. He waits until you crest the hill and disappear from view and then he climbs back into his car, pulls a u-turn, and drives back to his big, empty house, letting you keep hold of the heart he gave to you years ago.

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x fem!reader #stranger things #writing by 's'#1k follower celebration with 's'

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hertzwritings · 3 years

Text

An Arrangement: Alternative ending

A/N: I couldn’t just not have an alternative ending! So for anyone who’s like, oh, it was too sweet or too nice, don’t you worry, because I am going to deliver a world of hurt with this one. Of course. There’s also coming a few drabbles, so be on the lookout!

Again, I gotta say SORRY in advance. I hurt my own feelings and my adopted son, @cooldreamlandsandwich with this. Thank you, love, for ping-ponging ideas for this ending!

Feedback feeds the soul and requests are always welcome!

THIS IS A VERY HEAVY CHAPTER AND IT TOUCHES ON GRIEF, FUNERALS AND DEATH – IF THIS IN ANY WAY TRIGGERS YOU, PLEASE IGNORE THIS ENDING!

Also thank you again to @cooldreamlandsandwich for her amazing edits, that helped me write this ending. She's open to do edits, if any of y'all want one!

MASTERLIST

SERIES MASTERLIST

ASK ME ANYTHING/REQUESTS

Pairing: Henry Cavill x reader

Warnings: ANGST ANGST ANGST, language, character death, funeral

Wordcount: 5.050 (sorry not sorry)

CANON ENDING

When love loves alone

Y/N:

You opened the door slowly, looking at Henry as he stood on the doorstep, wringing his hands. “Hi.” You whispered. Your voice was broken, you could hear it, and you knew he took note as well – his eyes darted up and searched your face. “Hi.” He answered and you both stood, watching each other. Kal whined next to him as you sized each other up, trying to feel each other out. “Can we come in?” He asked slowly. Kal wagged his tail and whined. You nodded and opened the door wider to let them both inside. You closed your eyes, your heart leaping, as his cologne permeated your senses. Fucking shit.

Kal didn’t waste time and went straight to your couch, settling down and huffed happily as he took up the entire couch. “Can I get you anything?” You asked politely. “Just water, thanks.” You nodded as he sat down, his eyes scanning your apartment, as you poured a glass of water for him and grabbed the wine for yourself; there was no way in hell you’d be able to get through a conversation with him without alcohol. You handed him the glass of water and sat down opposite from him and for the first time, truly looked at the man in front of you.

He looked worse than he did on the morning segment. His eyes were dull and lifeless, the gentle mirth that normally hid behind the blue, was completely gone. The dark circles were almost etched into his skin at this point, and he had lost all color to his face. He looked like he hadn’t slept for a month. He sighed and ran a hand over the stubble on his cheeks, taking a sip of water and setting the glass on the table with shaking hands.

“Henry…” You tried to start, but your voice broke, and you cleared your throat. “Y/N.” His eyes searched yours desperately. “I’m not here to… I don’t really know why I’m here. I just couldn’t… Not.” You sighed and took a sip of your wine. “Henry, you can’t do this. You can’t show up here after a month without… A plan. Not even that, you shouldn’t show up here. We’re done, remember?” You told him with a shaky voice. He nodded and bit his lip. “I know. I just… I wanted to try. One last time.” He cleared his throat. “I just wanted you to know that I remember. I remember everything you’ve told me, even things you haven’t. I…” He ran a hand through his hair.

“I remember the way you sigh in the morning, and I can’t explain how much I miss that sound in the mornings. I feel like I’m living in a morgue, just full of the ghost of you.” He said quietly. “I know how you hated when I dog-eared books. You hate hazelnuts, but love hazelnut creamer. You’re…” His eyes were glistening with unshed tears. “You would let your hair airdry, you didn’t like the feeling of wet sand, you hate cold, love the rain. You hate it when someone cuts you off, your mum is your best friend and you’re skittish when it thunders.” He said and you sighed. “Henry. I know you’re trying, I really, really do, but there’s nothing you can say to make… To get me to come back.” “I’m not asking you to come back. I’m barely asking anything. I just… Want to know if there’s ever a chance, I can see you again. I don’t want you to come back in the same way, we used to be. I know I can’t ask you that, and I don’t want you to do anything that goes against what you want. I just… I can’t stop. How do you make yourself not love someone?” He asked breathily. You closed your eyes as the knife of his confession burrowed deeply in you. “Henry…” You whispered his name as a prayer. “I can’t do this.” It already hurt too much.

“Y/N, I love you.” He said, his voice firm and confident. “I’ve known that for a while. I… Was I an idiot for thinking you were in love with me, too?” He asked in a small voice. “No. You weren’t.” You answered quietly, finally keeping your eyes locked on his. “I loved you. I love you, despite what I know to be healthy for me. It’s not good for me to love you, it hurts me too much.” You whispered, your fingers against the stem of your glass. “You rushed to love me, and then you rushed to leave me. I don’t… I have forgiven you over and over and over again, there’s nothing to forgive anymore. I wouldn’t expect you to fall back to me, because the sad truth of this life, this arrangement we had, is that… We weren’t real. The feelings there were, maybe, real, but they were forced on us and we had no choice but to accept it.” You drew a deep breath as your heart pushed against your lungs – you felt like you were choking on yourself, on the sad truth and hurt of the life, you’d lived with him.

“Maybe it hurts so much because… Because maybe we tried to leave as many memories as possible of ourselves with each other, because we knew one day we wouldn’t be together anymore. And I think that… Maybe we hurt because we can’t let go.” “Y/N…” Henry’s eyes were pleading. “I tried to convince myself for so long that this wasn’t real, it was a forced love and maybe it was simply infatuation. It isn’t. I can’t breathe fully without you.” “That’s not love, that’s dependency, Henry.” “Isn’t it the same?” He asked. You had no answer. “I won’t force you to go with me or even talk to me after I leave, but I need you to know that I do know you. I love you, all of you, even if you think you don’t belong in this life.” He sighed. “You’re wholly too good for me, and I think we both know it, but I’m selfish and want to keep you for myself, to put it simply. I have nothing but myself to offer, and I can’t do much more than hope it’s enough for you.” “I don’t belong, Henry. I live in an entirely different universe from you." You smiled sadly. “I don’t belong in the world where you are. It’s not self-deprecating to say it, and I can’t lie and say I didn’t like it, but… It wasn’t my life.” You twirled your glass in between your fingers. “I wish we had met at a different time, had different reasons to meet and spend time together, but there’s too much left behind in wishes.” “I’d leave it all in a heartbeat. I’d rather work in a shop, as a parking-guy… Anything. Anything to be with you, or just have the chance to explore this.” His voice sounded urgent as his hand found yours, and you physically felt like you were being ripped in half at the light touch of his hand. You didn’t know how much you’d missed his touch until just now. “I would leave everything behind. You… You taught me how to fully love, but you didn’t teach me how to stop and I can’t, I’m too deep in this now.” He said, his thumb rubbing against yours. “I don’t know how to… I just know I love you. I want you, any way, you’d want me. I’d be happy if it meant I only saw a glimpse of your smile once a year. It wouldn’t matter because that smile would keep me on for a lifetime.”

“Henry…” Your stomach felt like it was full of lead. “I wish I could tell you yes. I want to, but I know that, rationally, we wouldn’t work. I wish I could just let it go, but there’s too much around this. I’ve been too hurt, and you have too.” You breathed. “I love you, I do, but I feel like I would just…” You trailed off as his fingers weaved in between yours.

“I’m not asking for anything else but a chance, Y/N. Nothing more. No conditions, no reservations, noting but a promise to try.” You gulped down a small breath, your body shaking. He stood up and took your face in his hands, looking at you with burning eyes. “I wish nothing but love for you.” He whispered. You angled your head upwards and couldn’t help but lean into his touch, the final comfort before you had to break yourself cleanly in half.

“I can’t accept your love, Henry. It’s wrong like this.” You whispered and could see the last semblance of hope disappear behind his eyes, replaced by a dark emptiness. “Can’t you see it yourself? How strange it is like this? The very reason we’re hurting is because we spent so many minutes together, we never got a chance to see this love in the right way, because we… We were thrust together in this, and we depended on each other for a long time.” You felt a tear streak down your cheek. “I wish I could say yes. I want to say yes, but we both know it would nothing good. It would be volatile with us; the differences are too… I wish I could give you another answer, but we both know we need to forget.” “How could I?” He asked in a soft, broken voice and you felt his thumb stroke a tear away from your cheek. “How could I live a life, where you’re not present?” He urged. “I don’t know, because I have no idea how I’m going to do it.” You answered honestly. “But we need to try. I’m thankful for all you’ve given me, but… We need to live our life without each other in it. I need to go back to a life, where I’m at my bookshop, with my normal days, no cameras and just… Simple.” He sighed. “I don’t think I can forget.” He simply said. “You have to.” He finally let your face go and nodded once with wet eyes. “I don’t want to. I can’t stop loving you, you know?” His voice was soft. You couldn’t answer him, the love and sorrow in you would spill over, like endless, endless waterfalls cascading down stones and jagged rocks. You wouldn’t know if you could ever tame the waters if you answered him now. “Do you still think of me?” He asked. “Every day.” You whispered back, the truth of the words weighing heavy on your soul.

“I love you. Just… There’s never a closed door for you. I will always want you.” He said finally and walked to the door, followed by Kal. “I wish I had the guts to walk away and forget about what we had, but I can’t, because I know you won’t come after me. It makes me want to stay.” He said in a frayed voice.

“I know.” You whispered back. You would never get your heart back, you knew it, it would leave with the man who held it in his hands; it would be forgotten someday, left to collect dust and hold memories somewhere, and you’d forever be grateful for him holding it. You had accepted a long time ago that your heart wasn’t actually yours. You would never be able to turn your back to him, and you felt the way your very soul hung to him, the fingertips bleeding and raw just in the effort to keep a part of him near you. Someday he’d find someone, someone better for him and to him, who would cherish the way he had loved before. Maybe that person would find your heart in a little, dusty box in many years from now and keep it safe as well.

He stood on the doorstep and turned to you. “Can I kiss you?” He asked in a broken voice. You nodded once. Your will was only so strong.

His soft lips found yours and you closed your eyes, feeling your very soul be touched with his lips. You kissed him back, all the unsaid words lingering in the wasted breaths between you, the kiss painted by your salty tears. He pulled back, clearly conflicted and stepped down. “I’ll always wait for you.” He whispered as you closed the door behind him.

You broke down, a sob tearing through your throat as you fell against the door, folding in on yourself, tears flowing freely down your cheeks. You hugged your knees to your chest.

How could you ever go on living? You knew you were supposed to let him go, you knew he deserved a life with someone who understood his life, and that person wasn’t you. You sobbed, your body raking across broken glass and pulled at your hair, trying to find some sort of leverage, anything, to hold you to the ground and not drift away in the endless pain. It felt as if your soul had detached from your body, left, floating somewhere in the endless nothing.

What were you doing? He stood in front of you, openly hoping and wanting for you, and he had wanted nothing back but a maybe. You didn’t understand yourself, your conviction – how could you possibly say no to him, to yourself, and for what? Endless hurt and pain? Never knowing what might have been? He had willingly sat down in front of you, exposing everything for you, giving you anything you wanted for nothing but a maybe as an answer. It was impossible not to love him, impossible not to want him as he was, with everything that came with it; you’d willingly lay down your life for him, and you knew in an instant that you couldn’t let him go, not now, not ever. You had to at least try. Maybe it would hurt even more if it broke, the few strings still tethering you to him were so frail, and when they snapped, it might break you as well. But it was better to have loved and lost, than to never have lost at all.

You gasped and stood, scrambling to reach your doorknob and opening the door. There was no reason, no solid ground, to not at least try. You flung the door open and saw him folded over his car, his face buried in his arms, shoulders shaking. You ran out from your apartment as he opened the door, slowly getting inside.

“Henry!” You shouted his name with full force, hoping to at least let him hear you. He turned slowly, stopped halfway inside of the car. Your heart swelled as he found your eyes. They were dark in the dim light of the moon, but you could see the soft glimmer of hope sparking behind the blue. “I want…” You never finished your sentence. The last thing you felt was the pavement rumble under you before your eyes lit up with the light from two headlights.

----------------------------

Henry

His throat felt constricted by the tie, and he pulled at it angrily, hoping to loosen it, before realizing that it wasn’t the tie, but his throat that constricted the flow of air. He glanced at himself in the mirror and didn’t recognize the man staring back at him. He was barely there, really. Eyes sunken in, deep circles under them, no glimmer of hope, life, or light in his eyes. His cheeks were hollowed and the stubble on his face rested like a shadow against his skin.

He turned from the ghost of a man and grabbed the suit-jacket that hung over the back of her favorite chair. His fingers slid gently over the back of the chair, feather light touches, as if he was too scared to touch it really and remove whatever was left of her. Kal whined as he passed him, and he bent down to scratch his ear. The big dog leaned his fluffy head against his hand in a silent comfort.

It wasn’t right, this way. His eyes fell on the picture of her, the secret smile on her face full of unsaid things. He had moved it to his apartment now, not wanting it to be hidden away anymore. He couldn’t hide her from prying eyes, everybody needed to see her once, if nothing else, they needed to see the unbridled beauty in her. She was safe in the picture, her smile forever on her face, and she stood on the shelf over his fireplace, always watching an endless sunset. He caressed it once, his thumb stroking her still cheek, before he put on his shoes and looked around the apartment once more.

It felt so empty. So lost, so bare, without anything of her. Maybe it was the lack of soul in the apartment, the lack of air he felt every day, or maybe it was a representation of his state of mind; he felt so empty and gray, like some eternal fog laid heavily around him. It didn’t matter anymore. He didn’t feel anything but hollow and the heavy weight of grief.

He closed the door behind him and breathed deeply, a shaky sigh escaping his lips as he walked slowly to the doors and the waiting car, waiting to take him to the place, where he would forever leave his soul behind.

The ride was quiet, Steven simply driving as Henry stared out of the window, watching buildings and trees flying by. Maybe he was dreaming, maybe it was all just… A horrible nightmare that would end soon. He had tried to pinch himself, even hurt himself to just wake, but the universe was against him and refused to remove this waking nightmare from him. It was horrifying, the lengths he was willing to go to, just to feel her in some way again.

As the car slowed, he saw the waiting crowd of black and his heart felt like it was made of stone, completely still and so heavy in his chest. Steven turned his head towards Henry with a sad smile on his lips. “Want me to come with you?” He asked, sincerity in his words. Henry shook his head in a daze. “No, I… I have to do this alone, I think.” “I’ll be here. Anything you need, just call.” Steven said and Henry nodded gratefully before getting out of the car, the chill wind enveloping him in a tight embrace. For such a warm summer, the wind had decided to match the emotions in him, and for that, he was grateful. It would be unrelentingly painful if the sun had shone on him, warming his body on this day. He looked over the hills of green and gray stones, to the crowd of black backs that stood nestled between trees. He felt his throat constrict again and pulled at the tie once, trying to loosen it as he walked with heavy feet towards the crowd.

They were silent, only soft cries echoing around them. An older woman held tightly onto the shoulder of a man, who looked so broken, it physically hurt to look at. They turned to him, and broken smiles crossed their faces for a second. The woman came to him and stretched her hands out, grasping his elbows tightly. “I’m so sorry.” He whispered. There was nothing else to say to Y/N’s mother, who searched his face with wet eyes. She shook her head with a smile, that was interrupted by tears. It was strained and tight. “Don’t be. She…” She drew a deep breath and turned to her Y/N’s father, who simply nodded once at Henry. He nodded back and left it at that. The man didn’t want to talk, and Henry wouldn’t push him to do so.

She led him to the small stand in front of an open, square hole in the ground and his heart jumped to his throat; he couldn’t get himself to look at it, much less the white coffin that stood next to it, waiting to be lowered down. He couldn’t fathom that Y/N, who used to be so alive, was in there, silent, her smile forever frozen somewhere behind her lips. The sorrow that followed the thought of never seeing her lips curl into that damn smile again, made him almost lose his footing. He gasped, suddenly feeling the heaviness of what he was about to do on his shoulder like a physical manifestation of sorrow.

She gently led him past the hole and coffin to the small podium in front of it and sighed. “She’d love that you were here.” She whispered. He shook his head and found the older woman’s eyes. They were so recognizable, the echo of her daughter in them and it pained him to look into them, not finding Y/N in there.

“It’s because of me, we’re here.” He whispered brokenly. She sighed and patted his cheek gently, softly as his own mother would. “No, sweetheart. It’s not.” She caressed his cheek so gently, it hurt. “You are not at fault for this.” She said softly. How did she have this level of compassion for a man, who had done nothing but hurt her daughter? “She loved you. I know she did.” She finally said and removed her hand from his cheek. “The priest is going to say a few words, and then I’ll say something, then you’re free to say your piece. I hope…” She swallowed a sob. “I hope you find peace in this.” She pressed a leather-bound book into his hand, before leading him to the chairs on the side of the podium, where a young woman already sat, her eyes blank and wide, staring unseeingly at the coffin.

“It’s impossible, isn’t it?” She said quietly as he sat down next to her. Her knuckles were white as she clenched around a tissue in her hand. He simply nodded. “She isn’t supposed to be there. She isn’t.” She whispered; her voice laced with tears. He swallowed thickly. “No, she isn’t.” he answered. She finally looked at him, rage, and sorrow blazing behind her eyes. “If you hadn’t shown up, she’d still be here. I want to hate you so much, I really do. I just… I can’t. For her. For her, I won’t hate you.” She whispered as the attendees sat down, quiet whispers dying down. “I’ll hate myself enough for the both of us.” He spoke softly. She simply nodded and turned her face back to the coffin. He glanced at the book in his hand and opened it, his fingers gliding over the words, that Y/N so carefully had written down, feeling several places, where her hand had pressed the pen down a little harder than others. He saw a few words and had to close his eyes. Henry… Love… The beach. He couldn’t see it, not now.

“Y/N Y/L/N was a woman of conviction.” The priest started, and droned on about the superficial things, one was expected to say at a funeral. He didn’t listen, not really, his fingers cold and unfeeling as the voice of the priest kept on.

He saw Y/N’s mother stand on shaky legs and walk to the podium and he forced his ears to listen. He couldn’t look at the coffin, nor the picture of Y/N that stood next to it, her smile in her eyes. He had to hear her mom speak, that last sliver of her, he needed to hear.

“My daughter was a light. She is…” She swallowed thickly. “Was the light in the dark for a fair few people, and I couldn’t imagine my life without her. Now I must.” Her hands shook. “She’s… I can’t explain how much she was me, and I her.” She cleared her throat and her eyes darted to the white coffin, so still and unassuming. “She’s gone, and I have to continue to be a mother, although I don’t have a child, and that’s the cruelty of life and death.” She sobbed, the sobs settling somewhere in Henry’s being.

He’d never forget that sound for as long as he lived.

“I… I found this poem in her journal, written by Joyce Greenfell and it…” She breathed deeply. “My daughter was wise beyond her years and life.” “I understand you must release the ones you love and let go of their hand. I try and cope the best I can, but I’m missing you so much. If only I could see you and once more feel your touch.” Her voice carried like wings over the crowd of people. Henry felt the wetness on his cheeks and a hand slipped over his. The woman next to him, crying silently and who held the barely hidden hate for him, had slipped her hand over his in a small gesture of comfort and it broke him. A soft sob escaped his throat, and he grabbed the hand, his last lifeline in this life. She, despite her hatred and grief, found it in herself to comfort him. They must be one and the same, their grief echoed in each other as they missed and hurt over the woman, who laid forever still in under the white wood.

“Yes, you’ve just walked on ahead of me. Don’t worry, I’ll be fine, but now and then, I swear I feel your hand slip into mine.” Y/N’s mother stopped, broken sobs echoing in the quiet around them, and Y/N’s dad quickly walked to her and held her shoulders, leading her back to the seats. The priest cleared his throat and spoke.

“Now, Y/N’s… Boyfriend?” He questioned. Henry didn’t correct him. “Is going to say a few words.” The young woman’s hand fell from his and she sniffled as he stood, smoothing down his jacket. He walked to the podium, a seemingly endless walk, and stood in front of the hole in the ground, that were to be her final bed. It was so wrong, too cold for her. She would have hated it, and a part of him wished he could’ve lined the cold, hard ground with velvet.

“I…” He tried to start, but his voice was flat and broken. He cleared his throat. “I don’t have the words. The words, the life, have been taken from me when she was. I loved her fully and I wish I could tell her that.” He looked to the paper in his hands and put it away – nothing he had carefully written would ever be enough. “Y/N once told me that she didn’t believe in a one, true, love. I disagreed because I already knew her.” He felt his body grow weary as he talked. “She would smile at me, softly and knowingly, like she held onto a secret for me. Y/N was light, and she breathed life back into me, like spring would melt snow and let flowers force their way through frozen earth. She was spring, I was frozen ground. She…” He cleared his throat, determined to do this, get through this. For her. “I remember everything. The way she’d wrap around herself when the wind was too cold, the way her breath would hitch right before she laughed. I wish…” He finally looked at her coffin, the thought of her inside unbearable. “If only you knew how much those little moments with you meant to me. If only I had a few moments, a breath longer with you, I’d tell you all of it. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to look past your smile or unhear your voice or laughter.” He smiled softly at the coffin, talking only to her now.

“There will be no time in my life, where I won’t regret not living every moment with you. I’ll forever regret not knowing you for longer. You are, am still, the love of my life and though I’ll never see your smile again or hear the secrets you keep, I know this.” He choked back a sob. “I know that love won’t ever die. I will love you for as long as I exist, even after that.” He finally lifted his eyes and looked to her mother, father, and best friend. “When you can’t love, I’ll love for the both of us. Because I do. Even when it pains me, even when the love rakes my body as jagged edges of glass, I will love you.” He heard the way his words came out, strained and rough.

“I’ll wait to meet you again. The wait will be long, for my dream of you never ends. And I think John Greenleaf Whittier said it perfectly…” He said and closed his eyes as the words tumbled from his lips. The truth behind them hurt him wildly, shockwaves washing over his body – the forever silenced what if’s, the maybes and her unfinished sentence would haunt him forever. Her ghost would always linger in the corner of his eye, and he welcomed it. He welcomed the pain and longing because the pain reminded him that she was there. Once. For a moment in the endless time that had been and would be, she had existed somewhere, a flurry of stars crossing his night sky. He smiled sadly and looked to the picture of her with eyes blurred by tears.

“For all the sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these; it might have been.”

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Final A/N: I'm so so so so so so so so sorry for the hurt. I hope y'all aren't about to murder me. Let me know what you think and remember that cute, sweet (promise, super-fluffy) drabbles are coming for the canon ending!

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