my current top 3 favs in one piece and me forcing them to interact bc that's super unlikely to happen in canon right now
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A traditional "knight saves the princess" story except at the end, the princess sighs and goes, "I suppose you want my hand in marriage as a reward" and the knight goes, "Oh, no, I'm just new in town and wanted to make friends but I've got really bad social anxiety" and the princess is like, "Rad, because I was never gonna fall in love with you" and they live happily ever after as besties (they're both aroace).
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!! smut - minors dni; this is fuckin nastyy so look away or smthn; breeding kink :’3
mmm but simon not realizing he has breeding kink until someone brings it up
they’re out in a bar, chatting quietly even amidst the sheer volume of the weekend crowd, before johnny snorts and bumps his shoulders to simon’s in a teasing manner.
“especially LT,” johnny says, scottish accent even thicker now that he’s intoxicated. “he probably can’t wait to see his bonnie lass swollen with his kids. would probably retire jus’ for the very reason of makin’ her a momma.”
john snorts at johnny’s slurred words while kyle chokes on his drink, coughing quietly, almost politely, until john takes pity on the kid and smacks his back with measured thumps. johnny laughs, loud guffaws blending well with the buzz in the bar, but it’s not like simon noticed.
how could he focus when his mind’s feeding him images of the way you’d look heavy with a babe? or how he’d make it so that you are?
the way he’d fuck you until it takes; your pussy leaking and gaping and full of his cum. the way he’d keep you on his bed for hours, make a routine out of it until he’s repeating it for many days because he wouldn’t risk the chances. then, he can’t stop thinking about the way your body would change, building fat to cushion your belly, your sharp edges turning into soft and pudgy corners. the way you’d be so sensitive, so dependent on him.
fuck.
simon gets yanked back into the reality when he hears john chuckle, low rumbles of disbelief spilling from the puffs of his laughter. simon’s eyes flick up towards his captain and all john does is give him a pointed stare, his eyes crinkled in a surprised delight, before the older man tips his drink into his lips and finishes his bourbon.
simon’s fist closes around his glass of whiskey, and he tries his best to ignore the growing tightness of his jeans.
he can’t wait to file for a vacation leave.
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