#yeah i'll make a bit less money but fuck it i don't even care anymore

[slender-wannabe]

man cutting back on the shower shifts has been so great. i get to sleep in on my week of afternoons and stay in bed with my bf until he gets up for work. and then it motivates me to go to the gym because i have to move my car for him to leave. best choice i've made for my mental health lately. 😌

[beansnpeets]

I'm increasingly frustrated with Jon as time goes on. I was so angry yesterday over shit that I had to get stoned to try to calm down, but all that did was make me less anxious about it. I was still super angry.

He took the last roll of TP out of the package. Then he left the empty plastic packaging on the floor in the bathroom. We are 5 rolls into the new package of TP and he still hasn't thrown the plastic away. The garbage can is literally right there. It's RIGHT THERE. I'm not touching it on principal. It's not my job to constantly pick up after him.

Among many other things, too. Like I'm so fucking sick of this. And if I bring it up to him he gets pouty and plays victim and goes "I can't do anything right" and immediately goes on the defensive, even if I bring it to him calmly and gently. But god forbid I do anything, then he gets angry right away and tries to guilt me and scold me.

I don't think I'll ever be able to save up for the downpayment for the housetrailer I wanna buy. I keep having to spend money on other shit. Plus, the municipality that the house trailer is in, the RM office staff all quit and walked out because the SAO and counsel were treating them all like shit so even if I could buy the house I can't get title information or anything else because there's nobody at the office! Which is why I never heard back when I emailed them asking about buying an empty lot a couple weeks ago.

I'm trapped. There is no way out of this unless prices crash. I'm hemorrhaging money left and right because groceries are insane. I don't know what to do.

Oh, and last night a friend of Jon's who I used to be friends with until she got really flakey on me and stopped talking to me, was messaging him last night saying she was sad and wanted someone to hang out with so at almost 11pm he went to town to go hang out with her, which I wasn't keen on because they'd had a thing in the past and I don't entirely trust him if I'm being honest (some shit has happened in the past), but I wasn't gonna tell him not to go because like maybe it's fine and I'm being crazy (but also last time I trusted my partner too much (my ex before Jon) he cheated on me with the girl so). But yeah so he went. Got home at like 1am or so. I asked him how was going to town. Turns out she bailed on him and didn't reply to his messages after he told her he was on his way so he ended up having a nap in a parking lot, waiting for her to message him back, and then came home when she didn't. So whatever. I do get the feeling I'm being a little bit lied to, he's easy to read, but honestly I don't fucking care anymore. It's just more fuel for our inevitable breakup so whatever.

I'm just so sick and tired of everything. I'm so done. I wish there was a way out of this. Unfortunately I just have to endure it for now until I have an opportunity to leave. I'm hoping I can make some okay money with photography this summer to hopefully save because my regular paycheque isn't cutting it. Which is insane considering I'm an entire fucking legal assistant.

[slvtbible]

G O L D

chapter one

summary: [y/n is a young stripper who is adored by many men. harry styles is a man who loves to carry danger with him]

word count: 4222

pairing: stripper!y/n and gangleader!harry

warnings: violence, vulgar language, sexual acts, alcohol and drug

to be honest, i was a little hesitant to post it here and i don’t know if this story will blow up on tumblr or get many notes but that’s the last thing on my mind right now. i just want to share what i’ve been working on that kept you guys waiting for almost a year lol sorry about that. But yes, she’s finally here!! I posted first on wattpad before i put it here, I felt like the only way to reach out more people to read it it’s through that. And also, i decided to use a name on wattpad but I’d use the term ‘y/n’ on tumblr. Enjoy it all my loves! Give me feedbacks!💜

*

*

Harry fixes the collar of his sheer black shirt before tucking it neatly inside the black trousers he's currently wearing. He normally goes something more extravagant for going out. His closet is filled with colourful ruffles and Hawaiian shirts along with 'more than one colour' suits. However tonight, he needs to lay low for a bit. Especially when he's about to step into one of the most famous strip clubs in New York in an hour to meet up with the manager.

He's very much aware of the reputation he has put on himself out there. Though there's no use of camouflage and hiding, he still doesn't want a cause a scene,

Yet.

His hand lifts a bottle of Tom Ford from the dresser before spraying it twice on his neck. Stepping away from the full length mirror, he grabs his cross necklace from the bed before putting the accessory around his neck as he walks out of the room.

"Talk to me Reece" his heavy accent echoes the hallway as he walks downstairs, watching his few men pocketing their weapons,

Reece, the brown skinned man with tattoos nods. "He's there. Just got a word from Bianco. He appears isn't expecting you, Boss. However I do believe he knows you're coming soon. The club is far too crowded than usual but Bianco is taking care of that right now." He informs, showing him the message on the phone,

Harry can only scoff, nodding at him as a thank you. "That son of a bitch should've. Owes me more than fucking money." He mutters, inserting the .45 ACP inside his gun holster. "The car's ready?"

Nodding, Reece leads Harry down towards the basement. "As requested. Lamborghini Murcielago in blue hera. Pack with 640 PS and 471 kW, rules around 213 mph if you consider on hit and run. Still, I pack a standard Aeropack wing if you wanna go slow tonight. The windows? Bulletproof. In case anyone tries to kill you." Harry knows he's only joking about the last part. No one dares try to kill him before he does it. It's a pattern that everyone knows by now.

Harry lets out a low whistle, softly shaking his head as the machine beauty appears. Tracing lightly with his ring cladded fingers along the hood of the car. "Not planning to hit and run tonight, Reece. Not even thinking about racing down the street with my weapon outside the window. You don't have anything more. . . Less attractive?" He questions, still staring at the gorgeous car ahead of him,

"You know I don't do less, boss." Reece winks playfully, laughing to himself as he watches Harry roll his eyes. "Besides. Who knows you'll get yourself a bird tonight, eh? Take her out on a stroll before bringing her home to your place. Women love fast cars." He comments, pressing the button on the keys as the door opens,

Humming as a response, Harry walks towards the driver's seat, "I don't date anymore, thought my right hand man knew tha' " He speaks, words laced with seriousness while grabbing the keys from Reece's fingers,

He can only sigh and nod his head. "Understood. Yet, Kendra is like what? Two years ago? Gotta get yourself something better, boss. You deserve it. So do it tonight." He suggests, watching him going inside the car before shutting the door,

Harry smiles a bit, inserting the keys inside the ignition before starting the car. "Noted."

The dark haired man steps away from the car. Giving Harry a salute. "I'll be right behind you. See you there."

*

*

*

Y/N Y/L/N stands in front of the mirror as she applies another layer of red lipstick on her plump lips. Securing the tube back as she puckers her mouth to see if it fits the colour for tonight. She twirls, watching carefully how the gold lingerie clads perfectly around her breasts and down to her curvy hips and thick thighs.

She stops once her plump ass is facing the mirror, admiring how beautiful and big her bum is in the lingerie. It's a compliment really. She loves working out to give her bum a bit bigger. It's not that she hopes she'll gain attention from people, she just loves her body. She worships every piece of it despite what other people think of it. Insecurity was her biggest enemy but not anymore. After reading lots of books and poems about self love she learns that there's nothing she should be ashamed of.

Grabbing a bottle of lotion from her table, she squeezes the bottle into her hand before rubbing her bum with the cold cream, rubbing it neatly to make sure she doesn't miss a spot.

Another thing, she loves moisturizing her plump flesh before the show. It's sexy

"Joe is asking for you." She hears a voice coming from behind, craning her neck to see her closest co-worker Violet, already in her usual purple wig and attire as she stands beside Angelina. "I love working as a stripper but he really needs to learn to be patient and. . . shut up, i guess?"

Y/N releases a small laugh, moving her long dark wavy hair to rest on her chest. "I know, I know. Jesus, I've told him fifteen minutes prior that I'll take longer than usual." She slips on her gold heels and turns to face Violet, who's biting her lip as she stares at Angelina's body up and down. "Okay, how do i look?"

Violet raises her eyebrow, as if it's something her friend shouldn't be asking. "You kidding? You look like a sex goddess. Gonna get all the men on their knees for you, girl"

Scoffing, she shoots her a wink and a flirtatious smile. "Old men with beer bellies? No thanks. I'd rather make out with Gordon." She replies, seemingly disgusted about the thought of grinding on an old man's lap tonight.

"Is that a bet I hear?" Violet questions, leaning towards her a bit as she waits for her friend’s response. "Please tell me that it is so I can earn extra cash tonight."

Gordon is a perverted bartender that always keeps his eye on Y/N throughout her routine. He's 40 and is always asking Angelina on a 'date' and by date, he means her ass on his lap. Clearly something Y/N isn't too fond of. Him specifically. Violet and Y/N have always made a joke about him, something they could make a playful banter in every chance they get.

Plus, she heard he's married. Isn't he supposed to find another job rather than here? If his wife found out what kind of a sleaze bag she married, she would be crushed,

Rolling her eyes, Y/N shoves her playfully by the arm. "Ha ha, very funny" she answers, resuming to untangle her hair from knots.

Violet laughs, pinching her on the hip as she lets outa small squeal. "Just messing with you, baby. Good luck out there. Put the rest of us to shame tonight. . . Like any other night"

Y/N flips her off, yet knowing it's the truth. She's not trying to sound like a condescending bitch here but none of the girls here are actually capable to do what Y/N does. That's what makes men attracted to her. She knows what she's doing. She knows how to make a man hard.

"By the way, you heard what Joe's talking about earlier?" Violet asks, toeing off her heels as she exhales a relief sigh. "Damn those heels are killing me" She mumbles,

"No... What's about?" She turns her head to face Violet for her to explain, causing her to shrug her shoulders,

"Don't know much about it. . . But i hear Harry Styles is coming here to meet up with him. Something about transaction or shit" She waves it off, whispering it to Y/N, looking around to make sure no one is eavesdropping,

She almost chokes on her saliva after hearing Violet says the name. "Harry Styles?! The. . . mafia boss of New York..?" Her eyes widen at the possibility of the most dangerous man in the city paying a visit to the place she works at,

Nodding, Violet answers, "Yup. That Harry Styles. He's the devil. Let's hope this place doesn't turn into a war zone."

Y/N has heard about this Harry guy. The most feared man of New York. She does know a little bit of the relations between Joe and Mr. Styles. Almost every night she could hear Joe freaking out about this man. She may not know him that close, hell she had never even met him in person but people talk. One thing she learned about hearing his reputation, you don't ever want to mess with this guy.

Violet snaps her fingers to snap Y/N out of her thoughts. "Less worrying, girl. Come on, you got a show to put on yes?"

"Y-yeah. Fuck. . . now i'm scared" She breathes out, looking at her reflection in the mirror one last time. Calming down her mind.

After giving Violet a kiss on a cheek and receiving a tap on her ass, she takes a deep breath as she opens the beaded curtain and walk out to the club. Jhene Aiko is playing through the speakers, thanks to her who chose the music for tonight. She can already feel all eyes on her as she struts down confidently, putting on a smirk and winking at couple of men here and there. As much as it disgusts her, she grazes her hand along a man's arm who's biting his lip and looking at her up and down.

'What the fuck did i do to deserve this?' she thinks to herself, staring at the man in front of her who's probably the same age as her father. The thought of it makes her gag,

She gives the man a wink before getting up on the stage, hearing a few hollers from behind. reaching out to wrap her hand around the silver pole and her leg hooking up to support her body. Slowly twirling with her head thrown back and closes her eyes with money being toss at her direction before letting go and crutching down on her knees, moving close towards the same man earlier. He slips in a couple of hundred dollar bills inside her panties, causing the others to do the same.

This may be not how she pictures her success but damn, by the end of the week, her bank account can go from three to six digits.

She's definitely gonna hold on to that,

*

*

*

It takes Harry close to thirty minutes to get here. He blames it all on the traffic, cursing to himself every time he stops at red lights. He parks his car close to the entry before he exits from the vehicle. He looks over his shoulder to find a familiar black car driving towards her, noting to himself it's Reece's. Seeing him wave his hand to make sure he's coming in later.

He clears his throat, clenching his jaw as he walks into the club. Reece wasn't lying, the club is too packed for tonight. As if God knew what is about to get down tonight and isn't going to let him get away with witnesses. He really needs to play safe for a while tonight.

As he strides through the room to find a table he has reserved for, a few half naked girls walk right pass him, stroking his exposed chest and grabbing his shoulders. Most of them are gorgeous and he's tempted to touch their soft skin yet he has to hold it. Not that he isn't interested because he's definitely taking someone back to his place tonight--fucking Reece had to be right-- but he needs to get his head in the game for at least an hour before planning to do so.

Gently, he pulls back a chair for him to sit. He specifically asks for the furthest table so no one can figure out what he's about to do tonight. A glass of whiskey has been set on his table before he got here, waiting for Joe's arrival. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Reece and Bianco walking over to his table. One of them gives him a nod to acknowledge his presence.

Harry lifts the glass up to his lips and take a sip of it. Honestly, he hates doing all of this dirty work. Sure, he's the boss. But he despises complicated things. He should've known not to trust Joe about anything, yet when he begged on his knees with a gun knocked against his head as he spat out a bunch of threats to the weakened man, he thought why not? If Joe didn't get to fulfill his demands, he gets to kill him either way. It's always a pleasure for him to do so.

"Mr. Styles! Ay, i'm so happy to see you. You look a lot cleaner than i saw you the last time, eh?" Joe's voice causes Harry's green eyes averts from the scene on the crowd. His eyebrows are knitted, jaw tightened as he taps his fingers against the table, causing the rings he's wearing to knock.

He owes him money worth $50,000. And this man had the nerve to walk in and act like nothing happened.

He is definitely going to kill him.

"Stop with all that shit and sit the fuck down. You owe me something Joe." Harry warns, pointing at him as Harry's men forces the dark haired male to sit down making him gulp. "You owe me 50 grand for that package you piece of shit."

Joe couldn't feel more terrified as he catches a glimpse of Harry's gun on the table, facing towards him. "I know Harry, I know. I didn't forget, okay? It's just the money is tight right now. The girls aren't getting the amount of money they used to be getting." Joe tries to reason but Harry isn't having any of it,

"Stop being a fucking pussy and blame your girls for the money you've lost. I'm running out of patience here, Joe. If you don't give me the money by the end of the week, you're a dead man. I still have one body bag left in my car and I wouldn't mind writing your name on it." Harry grits his teeth, looking at him with a dark look in his eyes. Hand gripping tightly around the glass

"No man, I need more than that. Please, I'll do whatever you ask me to. You will have your money man I promised." Joe begs, looking at Harry with hopeful eyes.

Harry finds it quite disgusting to see someone like him beg for mercy-- for the second time--or anything at all to be honest. He find that gesture is weak and vulnerable which makes him very easy to manipulate over. "I don't give out second chances."

Joe hears a gun clicks behind, he doesn't need to know what's going on. He knows one of the two men behind him is ready to blow his brains out. "Harry man. . . One more. . . Give me one more"

Harry isn't a patient man. He doesn't want people beg. He doesn't want him to beg. But he finds it interesting to see how it goes, playing along this little game of his.

"Fine. you give me your best girl and i'll give you two months." Harry offers, cocking his eyebrow as he leans back to relax himself. "No more than that."

Joe's eyes widen at Harry's demand. It's impossible to collect a 50 grand in two months, especially when he's short on it. He needs more than that. Still, he thinks two months is better than nothing. "Okay. . . Agreed. Just tell me which girl you want or-or i could bring one or two here, man. Take your pick."

Harry can only hum in response, scanning his eyes over the scene. Dozens of girls dancing on stage, few of them even has their bras taken off. It seems to him, none of these girls on the room is his type.

Until his green eyes fall on a certain slightly curvy woman with her leg wrapped around the pole.

Her long dark hair brushing lightly against the floor as she bend her back a bit. He observes the way her body move so dirty yet gracefully around the pole,  the way she bites onto her pink glossed lips and how her brown eyes manage to flirt with the crowd and had them lure into her eyes including himself. He swears this girl just steps out of his daydreams. She looks perfect.

He admires how she circle her hips painfully slow, jealous how he isn't close enough to watch her plump flesh near his strong figure.

"Her. I want her" Harry points at the girl he can't take his eyes off. His voice sounds too possessive but he doesn't care if he does. He's too enhanced with the way she moves on that stage and he loves how she swats those dirty hands who seems desperate to cope a feel with a dirty look on her face.

'Seems like a fighter' he thinks to himself

"Y/N? You want her?" Joe asks after he realises who Harry's pointing at.

"Y/N? That's a gorgeous name. She's not taken is she? Not that i care anyway. She's a dime from what i can see here." He says, not tearing his eyes off of her while he sips on his drink. "You're gonna give me her to me aren't you?" Harry asks, his eyes are threatening enough for Joe so he nods his head as a response.

"Yes. Of course. If that's what you want."

"Fuck yes i do. Bring me to one of your rooms. I want a private from her" He demands before gulping down his drink, standing up to head over to the back. Not before glancing at the gorgeous woman one last time who stuffs a few dollar bills in her panties.

*

*

After what it feels like forever dancing on stage and have men whistling at her to go over and give them more, she finally sit herself down on a chair in her dressing room and take a deep breath. Moaning in relief as she pulls her heels off while setting her timer on because she only has thirty minutes to rest before going back out there again. She leans back against the chair, sighing in a pure bliss.

She can hear a few girls talking and laughing while preparing themselves for their performance tonight, wishing she could just join in because Violet informs her earlier there's some juicy gossip she needs to talk about but she cant take it. She's too tired.

She has only closes her eyes for 10 minutes until a familiar voice speaks out,

"Where's Y/N?"

She groans internally. Can never mistake that voice soon as she hears it. Her manager, who sounds like he's panting, voice firm as if is an emergency to call her out like that. Y/N still has her eyes shut as she raises her hand up, not having the energy to respond.

"Okay, good. Y/N. You don't need to go back out there again. There's a special guest I need you to entertain. He's already waiting in the red room."

She nods and hum, only to realize what he means as her eyes bugs out.

Wait, what?

She's quick to turn around, brows furrows and mouth hangs open, not believing what she has just heard. "Pardon?"

"There's a man. A guy who I work with, waiting in one of the rooms. He specifically asked for you. I need you to at least give him an hour." Joe notifies, running his hand over his face as if he's stressed about something,

"You want me to give a lap dance to your co-worker?" She raises her eyebrow, not believing what he just asked her

Joe sighs angrily, "it's technically not--Y/N... please. No more questions, just go over there."

"Who's the guy?" she ignores his orders as she stands, crossing her arms across her chest. "Jesus, fuck. I really need my hair to breath" she mutters, brushing down her long dark brown hair,

"Harry Styles."

Y/N freezes in an instant. Looking up to stare at Joe in the eye to see if he's joking, he can only nod his head to confirm her questioning look. " you're shitting me."

"I'm not," Joe replies, walking over to her, not wanting the other girls to hear. "Y/N, I owe him money. I haven't got them yet and--"

She scoffs, rolling her eyes and continue messing with her hair a bit more. "Not my problem."

He reaches out to grab her elbow, pulling her harshly causing her to stumble a bit. "Y/N, please... He wanted to kill me out there earlier. The guy brought a gun for God's sake. He gave me a month but until then... he wants you."

"You know i'm not a hooker" Y/N defeatedly sighs. She wants to help him, she does but it sounds like he's selling her off for a month to this notorious and dangerous guy who is named to be the deadliest man alive by the people of New York.

She loves money but no fucking way she's willing to die for it.

"I didn't say you were" He roughly says, hand gripping tightly on her arm. "Just... do it" He let her go, tired of the waiting because he doesn't want to make Harry pissed off now,

The girl sighs angrily, squeezing her eyes shut as she hesitates for a while. What the fuck did she get herself into?

"Fine. just give me a moment."

Giving her a smile, Joe thanks her by giving her a kiss on the cheek, telling her the door number Harry is in before walking out of the room. Soon after he walks out, she feels sick in her stomach. How could she ever go face to face with a man with blood in his hands? She's about to give this man a lap dance. Who knew he might've ask for more?

So now, as she finishes re-applying a layer of red lipstick, she heads out. Walking to the back of the room in a slow pace. Heart beating loud and fast as she's about to come face to face with this man. Still, she needs to play it cool. God really fucking hates her,

If he really does exists.

She takes a deep breath before opening the brown door carefully, pushing it open. Her knees almost buckle at the sight of Harry Styles, lounging on the leather couch. A cigarette squeeze between his fingers. legs spread open as if it's an invitation already made for her. His head turns towards the door, a smirk graces upon his face.

She's not going to lie. He is indeed dashingly handsome. With his arms resting on the back of the couch making his biceps look a bit bigger. He's got killer looks too. she studies. Sexy smile, and stubble which creates a sexier look on his face. She catches a glimpse of a silver cross necklace resting against his broad chest. His eyes are sharp. Looking at her up and down with his bottom lip bitten between his teeth.

"My, my" he lowly whistles, watching her every move as she enters the room. Locking the door behind her. "I wasn't wrong. You are a fucking dime."

Y/N giggles-- though feeling scared shitless-- and run her hands over her hair as she struts her way towards his figure. Purposely swaying her ass side to side a bit to tease him. "Mr.Harry Styles. . . I heard a lot about you. Word on the street is that you're a man that likes to carry a danger" she smirks seductively as she stands in between his open legs, dragging her finger slowly down her chest.

Her angelic voice is like music to his ears,

"Yeah?" he smirks, eyes falling to the curve of her breasts. "Hope that doesn't scare you, doll. All i want is a dance from you, that's all. I also heard that you are their favourite girl. After seeing you danced on that stage, I now know why."

Again, she giggles. A small blush creeping on her cheeks, hopefully he doesn't see it. "You're a flirt aren't you, Harry? You do this to every girl?"

He places his hands slowly on her plump ass, he doesn't know if he's allowed to touch but he doesn't give a shit. She seems isn't bothered by it. He wants this girl and he wants her now.

"Only to those who i find interesting, baby. Now, are you going to show me what you got?" He asks, looking up to meet her brown eyes as he squeezes her flesh.

With a devilish smirk, she slowly sets herself down on his lap which causes him to let out a soft groan. She runs her hands down to his tattooed chest and toys with his cross necklace for a bit before whispering in his ear, "sit tight and relax, Mr. Styles. I'll be your good girl for tonight"

next chapter

*

i really don’t want to write a super long chapter, because i’m afraid it’ll bore you guys so maybe--i hope-- this is enough. anyway, i hope you guys enjoy this first chapter, let me know if you guys hate it or love it! I’ll appreciate it. love you guys!

[starlightxsvt]

Sweeter Than Sweets l pt. 3

Pairing ➳ CEO! Seungcheol x female baker!reader

Genre ➳ fluff, romance, slight smut

Warnings ➳ light cursing, some nudity, implications of sex (forgive me if it's bad, this is my first time trying to write smut)

Word count ➳ around 4.1k

A/N: Here's the third chapter~ I'm really sorry for the delay. If everything goes according to plan then there's only one more chapter left! Thank you for giving this series such love, it means a lot to me. Happy reading!

part 1 l part 2 l part 3

Part 3: THE WEDDING

"It's okay, you're gonna be fine," Seungcheol throws a smile at you as you both stand at the front door of his parents house. You continue to smooth out your beautiful champagne coloured dress and touch your hair out of nervousness.

You are here. At his parents house.

The door is opened by a maid who welcomes you into the house. You both step in and take off your coats and you follow Seungcheol to the huge living room, where his mother sits with a book in her hands.

She squeals seeing Seungcheol, adoration crossing over her features as she wraps her arms around him and kisses his forehead. "You're here! I was worried you wouldn't show up!"

"You deserve a chance to get to know ___. She's amazing," his compliment brings warmth in your cheeks as he pulls you closer to his side.

His mother grins looking at you before pulling you into a hug, "Yes yes, of course." She kisses your cheeks before a soft bark comes from behind you and you turn to see a white fluffy toy poodle, wagging it's tail, eagerly staring at Seungcheol. The man in question grins before picking it up, "Heyy, Kkukma!"

"She's our family dog. Loves Seungcheol a bit too much," Seungcheol's mother explains and you smile, nodding before gently petting the dog who licks your hand in return.

You laugh. Seungcheol kisses Kkukma's forehead before announcing, "You guys continue chatting. I'll go play with Kkukma."

You swallow, watching him disappear into the garden and his mother grins at you, "Let me show you around."

His mother walks you through their elegant house while asking about how you met Seungcheol and such. You speak the rehearsed lines and she believes them easily, making you feel somewhat bad for the poor woman.

"Seungcheol really isn't good with women, you know," his mother says while you're served a cup of tea after finishing the tour.

You offer a smile in reply and take a sip. She continues, "He used to like a girl quite a while ago. Told me that he wanted to marry her. But sadly, she turned out to be a leech who was using him for his money."

"That's... awful," you frown. Seungcheol never told you about it. But then again you're his fake lover and you mentally curse yourself for getting too much into your role.

"I take it he didn't tell you about that," She smiles. "Don't worry, he's long over her. That just made him shut himself out more. He assumed that all women were after his money but I'm glad to see he found someone like you."

You cringe inwardly. You too, are here because of money more or less. You are doing all this because he promised you a shop.

"Me too," you agree with her, playing along. She smiles. A sound catches both of your attention and you see Seungcheol's father standing at the entrance of the living room, his wary eyes casted on you. You almost choke but quickly redeem yourself by standing up and saying hi. He disregards you completely with a grunt and walks away murmuring something unintelligible.

Seungcheol's mother sighs loudly, "I'm so sorry about him."

"It's okay, I understand. Seungcheol told me about him." You mutter.

His mother offers you a sad smile. "He's been so mean to Seungcheol. To us. It was my mistake that I married that beast."

You say nothing, just stare at the cup in your hands.

She continues, "I would have divorced him long ago but he would have taken full custody over Seungcheol. I couldn't win against a man like him and I couldn't loose Seungcheol."

"I see," you whisper. His mother gently holds your hand, "I sincerely hope you won't take his words to heart. He has always been like that. Nothing we do can make him happy."

You offer her a smile, "It's really okay, Mrs. Choi."

"Minsoo, please. You're gonna be me daughter in law soon," she smiles sweetly at you. "Which reminds me! We need to set a date!"

Warmth spreads on your face as you smile, "Yeah..."

And so she starts discussing with you about the dress the venue and such and you find yourself enjoying her company. She's kind and gives full attention to you and it fills the void created by your own mother. You know you're going to miss this woman after you're divorced.

-

Everyone gathers at the dining table during lunchtime, including Seungcheol's father. The environment is tense as Seungcheol takes a seat beside you, opposite to his parents.

Seungcheol drops a kiss on your temple and smiles at you, flashing his dimples and you almost melt into a puddle right there. Shit, have you got it that bad?

His father's eyes bore into the two of you, clearly disapproving.

Lunch starts as Seungcheol's mother initiates conversation with her son about work. It goes well for a while- you enjoying the served food and listening to them talk- until Mr. Choi decides to break it.

"What does your parents do?" He throws at you.

Seungcheol frowns, "Father-"

You stop him by squeezing his hand and smiling at him, "It's okay, babe, he should know."

Your eyes meet Mr. Choi's, "My mother separated with my father a long time ago so I don't have contact with him anymore. My mom runs a restaurant at the suburbs."

Mr. Choi is unimpressed, you can see it in his face as he seems to judge you even harder. Mrs. Choi, however, has a different reaction, "Oh dear! It must have been hard for your mother. I'd like to meet her sometime soon."

You smile at her, "My mom kind of isolated herself after the divorce but of course, I'll let her know."

Shit, you haven't even told her you're getting married yet.

Mrs. Choi's smile is kind as she resumes eating. Mr. Choi scoffs before grunting, "I still don't understand why you chose her, Seungcheol. I know you've always been stupid but now I know you're on another level, choosing her out of all women."

Wow. You're left dumbfounded at his straight forwardness. Beside you, Seungcheol grips the fork tight as his mother tries to chastise her husband. "Hyungmin, watch what you're saying!" she shrieks.

"What?" His glare is intimidating. "She's neither rich nor pretty. Your son could've had a better looking woman yet he-"

"Enough!" Seungcheol seethes making you jump.

This...isn't gonna end well.

You open your mouth to stop Seungcheol but he bangs his first on the table, teeth gritting, "What is your problem?" He glares at his father.

"I should ask that to you." His father is expressionless.

"All my life I've tried to be a good son, I tried to be good to you no matter how much of an asshole you were to me, to mom. I've accepted that you hate me, I've no problem with that but for once in your life, can't you be supportive of me?!"

His father scoffs, "How can I when you bring a thing like her?"

Seungcheol looks like he's ready to jump on his father as he bellows, "I swear to fucking God-"

"Seungcheol!" You grab onto his arms, trying to stop him as Mrs. Choi starts sobbing.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

"This is why I don't like coming here!" Seungcheol hisses at his mother before jerking free from your hold and marches away.

Seungcheol's father stands up, rolling his eyes, "And you expect me to hand my company to him?" It's directed to his wife.

Angry tears steam down Mrs. Choi's face, "He'd be a better president than you ever were! Your company has come this far only because of my son!"

Her words land on the back of Mr. Choi who blatantly ignores his wife and walks out of the room.

The room is silent except the sounds of Mrs. Choi, trying to get her tears under control. You hand her a tissue and sit silently, watching her dry her eyes.

"I'm so sorry," she says, her eyes casted down.

You offer her a small smile. Mr. Choi's words hurt you, definitely but it's not the end of the world. He's gonna be present in your life for only a small amount of time.

"It's alright, Mrs. Choi, it really is."

She sighs, gazing upon you, her eyes filled with...love. She stands up to embrace you in her arms and holds you there; your head to her chest as you listen to her breathe.

It's comforting and you feel a tear slip down your eye.

-

Seungcheol walks you all the way to your door like the gentleman he is. His mood is still sour and the car ride was filled with tension. You couldn't really blame him though.

You smile at him, "His words doesn't matter to me. I hope it's the same for you. You don't need to be stressed about what he says to me."

He looks at you, those rich brown eyes looking exhausted and he does something you never expected even in your dreams.

He hugs you.

His strong arms are wrapped around your small frame, your head pressed to his chest. Your heart beats furiously in your chest.

Is this really happening?

You inhale his scent deeply and when you wrap your arms around him too, you can't bring yourself to care. You want to feel him, to hold him. So you two just stand there in front of your door in each others arms for a long time.

"Would you like to come inside?" Your voice is small and shy as he pulls back to look at you. Shaking his head, he does yet another surprising thing.

"Can I kiss you?"

Holy mother of gods-

Your face is on fire, undoubtebly. Your mouth hangs low as you stare at him. Did he just...

He takes your silence as yes and leans in to press his lips against yours. They're soft and plush and he tastes somewhat bitter and sweet from the wine you had at his parent's house. It's addicting and you can't help but moan. He only dives in deeper, kissing you with such passion and need that you're left breathless.

He pulls back, his smoldering gaze on you and licks his lips. You swallow. Your panties are wet, fuck. You want to climb him like a tree but you can't bring yourself to move, locked in a trance.

A gentle kiss is pressed to your forehead that brings you back to reality and he mutters his goodbye, hurriedly ushering you in.

After you're in the safety of your home, you touch your swollen lips, mind traveling back to the kiss.

He kissed you.

Choi Seungcheol kissed you.

-

"Yes, I'm getting married," you repeat once more to your mother who stays silent on the other side of the line.

"Mom?"

"That's... sudden," her calm voice floats through. Yeah, and I'll be getting divorced too.

"Yeah, we've been dating for more than a year and yeah...he proposed me."

"Wow... nice." She pauses. "Did you fix a date yet?"

"Um, not yet but it's in the next two or three weeks. Also...Mrs. Choi wanted to meet you. Maybe...you could come and visit her sometime...I don't know." There's an awkward tension- it always has been ever since your dad left.

"I'll see if can manage time," she says.

"Okay..." You're about to hang up but her voice wavers through, "And send me a picture of your rich fiance."

"Oh, yeah, I will."

-

SOME WEEKS LATER

Jane squeals seeing you step out from behind the curtains. You're almost ready with the gown on and your makeup done, only the veil left to be put on.

"Oh my god!" She screams with glee, a grin on her face. "You! Look at you! Oh my god!"

You look gorgeous, undeniably. The wedding gown is almost too beautiful to be real and an expensive purchase, selected by Mrs. Choi. Your makeup and hair is done neatly and you almost don't recognize yourself. Jane only squeals from behind you time to time, saying how amazing you look.

"You're forgetting that this isn't a real wedding," you remind her, your tone bitter than you intended.

Jane raises a brow, "Why do you sound sad?"

Warmth covers your face, "I'm not!" It is a cheap lie, you do feel sad and you know that deep down you wished this was real.

Shit. You've got it really bad.

"Aww, babe," Jane hugs you tightly. "It's okay, it's gonna be okay. Who knows, Seungcheol may fall head over heels for you after seeing you in this."

You roll your eyes, "Not even in my wildest dreams."

A knock on the door interrupts you and your mother steps into the room, dressed in a cream colored dress, her hair neatly done. It has been a while since you last saw her dressed up.

"I'll leave you two to talk," Jane excuses herself, stepping out of the room.

"Hey," you smile tightly. She returns it. "You look beautiful," her words are short and her eyes are teary. There's a short silence before she sighs loudly,"I know I haven't been the best mom...but I'm really proud of you, I hope you know that."

You sigh; you really don't want to cry before your wedding- fake wedding. "It's okay," you give her a small smile and sit down in front of the mirror, "Can you help me with the veil?"

She steps in behind you and starts setting up the veil on your hair, speaking, "Seungcheol is a nice guy, I had a chat with him earlier. He'll take good care of you."

You resist the urge to heave out a sad sigh. Instead you grin as brightly as you can, "I know, right."

She finishes putting the veil on you and you stand up, looking at the mirror, gathering all the last bits of your courage.

"I could walk you down the isle you know...it doesn't always have to be dads," your mother whispers.

"It's okay, I'll do it on my own," you avoid her eyes. This is a fake wedding and you don't want her to walk you down the isle, no. Maybe when you get married for real one day- but not this time.

Giving your mother a quick hug, you step out of the dressing room.

The isle looks dreadful. Walking on a path full of thorns bare feet would've been easier. Seungcheol stands at the other end, his full attention on you. You inhale deeply and take small steps towards him- all the while his eyes on you. You are intimated and in the back of your mind you can't help thinking that this was a very bad decision. You feel pathetic. A bride without anyone to accompany her down the isle. A greedy woman agreeing to a fake marriage. A liar, lying to everyone through your teeth.

Each step only gets harder to take and after what feels like an eternity, you reach the end, stopping in front of him. His face doesn't give away anything. A small part of you wonders if he thinks you look beautiful- you hope he thinks that.

You take a step and get on the wooden stage with the help of his extended hand. The priest begins the ceremony. All the while, Seungcheol's eyes are dark, glinting like a predator who has finally captured his prey.

He smirks. "I do."

With tears burning in the back of your eyes, you repeat after him, overwhelmed with emotions.

When he leans in for the kiss, you forget to breathe as your lips meet and he kisses you softly yet passionately. The guests cheer for you and when you look at them, you see joy, contradicting to what you feel. For some reason tears threaten to slip but you smile, forcing them away.

One fake marriage can't end your life.

-

You enjoy the rest of the ceremony more than you thought you would, all the worries slipping away from your system as you watch everyone celebrate. Time to time you take peeks at Seungcheol to see him staring at you- his eyes dark and intense, sending a shiver down your spine.

You've spent a good amount of him hanging out with him during the weeks before your wedding, either at his apartment, yours or a nice restaurant. You've only found yourself more drawn to him as you spent more time and after each date ended you wanted him to kiss you like he did after that visit to his parents' house. Unfortunately for you, Seungcheol kept his hands totally off you, only giving you quick forehead pecks as goodbyes.

As your eyes connect, sitting next to each other after the dance, you find yourself craving for him. You want his hands all over you.

Is that wrong?

-

A sudden, new wave of embarrassment hits you as you enter the limousine after the ceremony. Seungcheol helps you get in before entering through the opposite door as you quickly collect your beautiful dress together and sit quietly, staring at your lap.

It's almost 9 o'clock and the traffic has faded away. Seungcheol is taking you to his penthouse, a place you've only heard him talk about, a place he said you'd enjoy living in.

You wonder how the next couple years would be. How will it be like to live with him? Will you sleep in the same bed every night? Will he even enjoy sharing his house with you? What if he hates having you around?

"Are you ignoring me?" Seungcheol's voice pulls you back to reality.

You try not to appear shy and flustered, "Huh? No, no I'm not."

"You've been awfully quiet since you've walked down the isle."

"Just... thinking." You reply meekly. Damn it, why do you feel so shy?

There's a silence as Seungcheol looks out the window, hands under his chin. You take the moment to appreciate his profile, ogling him unashamedly. You really, truly, want to be in his arms. And you should probably get your head checked.

"Do you regret doing this?" He asks suddenly.

"No! No, I do not," you protest to which he nods, understanding.

After a beat if silence his hand gently cups yours. You stop breathing. "I'll try to make your living as comfortable as possible. Don't hesitate to let me know if you have any problem." His expression is serious and you nod, throat dry. He smile is soft, showing just a bit of his dimples as he holds onto your hand, not letting go. You try to calm your breathing which proves to be an impossible task whenever you look at your joined hands.

After almost an hour drive, the limousine stops and your breath is sucked out as you get out of it. In front of you stands a huge building with the fanciest design and you can't wait to see what's inside. Seungcheol helps you with your dress and casually holds your hand as you both walk into the elevator. It heads for the seventeenth floor and during that whole period of time Seungcheol doesn't let go of your hand. When the elevator stops and you both step out into a large lobby, leading to his penthouse. Seungcheol swipes the card to open the door and it's only after you step into the apartment that he lets your hand go.

You probably look like a deer in headlights as you gawk at the beautiful home, equipped to unbelievably expensive appliances and delicate designing. With high ceilings and full length windows and beautiful pieces of furniture and marble fittings it's too pretty to touch.

All the while Seungcheol's eyes are on you, amused at your reaction. "You like it?" He grins.

"I...wow," you're speechless. "This is...huge." You say dumbly. Seungcheol laughs heartily before once again taking your hand, "Let me give you a quick tour."

And so he does, showing you around the house, the huge kitchen connected to the living room, the library, the study room the guest bedrooms and finally stopping before the master bedroom.

A king sized bed lies by the huge windows. There's a closet with an amount of space you could only dream of. The master bathroom is almost the size of your studio apartment and a wave of embarrassment hits you. Will you ever get used to this? You only feel more embarrassed when you remember that this isn't yours forever.

Shit, ___. Get a grip.

You plop down on the large fluffy bed and pry off your heels from your aching feet. You watch as Seungcheol stands in front of the dresser, slowing undoing his bow tie.

There's a small moment where you both lock eyes before you cough loudly, trying to ignore the butterflies in your stomach. Instead you quietly take off your earnings and reach for the buttons behind your dress- except, your hands can't reach them.

Seungcheol sees you struggling, "Let me do it for you." You almost let out a squeak, feeling shy and excited. You stand up as he appears behind you and starts to unbutton your dress, slowly.

It feels like eternity as you stand, holding your breath, blood pumping loudly in your veins.

Seungcheol's deep voice sends shivers down your spine, "There, done." He says that but doesn't move from behind you, his hands resting on your shoulders as the cool air hits you back. You, too, seems to be stuck on your place as you can't move a muscle. Your conscience slaps her head, what the hell is wrong with you?

"Did I tell you how beautiful you look?" Seungcheol's mouth is extremely close to your ear and you can't help but squeak, warmth spreading through your body like wildfire.

"You look lovely, so beautiful," His voice is deep as he strokes the column of your neck before turning you to face him.

Your eyes are wide like saucers and your face is on fire, literally. Just being this close to him, with none around, makes your brain stop functioning.

He leans in and captures your lips in a kiss, without any warning whatsoever. Your tongues collide and you let him take the lead, his hand grabbing your ass, unashamedly.

"Tell me if you want me stop, I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

"No!" You grab onto his broad shoulders and pull him towards you again, meeting your lips once more. Of course you want him. You've wanted him since God knows how long.

While peppering your face with kisses, he pushes down your gown for you to step out of it. The cold air makes you shiver as you're left in a lacy white underwear with garter belts. Seungcheol's eyes move over your, taking in your figure. He swallows before pushing you down onto the bed and climbing over you, hurriedly taking off his suit jacket and shirt.

His eyes are locked on yours and your heart is beating a mile a minute. He looks like some god, his black locks messy and his chiseled face staring down at you, his strong body on top of you. You can't stop yourself from ogling his torso when his shirt comes off, leaving his toned muscles and biceps for you to see. Before you know it, you're reaching out to touch him. Your fingers dance over his chest and abdomen before your eyes meet and Seungcheol groans, cupping your face for another kiss.

He's quick to strip you off your bra while literring your neck and chest with kisses and bites. After fully undressing you and taking yet another unembarrassed look at your body Seungcheol asks, "Are you sure?"

You whine, needy and impatient, "Yes, please, Seungcheol. Fuck me." You're surprised at your own eagerness but it only turns Seungcheol on, a devilish smirk on his lips.

"My pleasure sweetheart." He whispers before going down between your legs.

-

Soft morning light hits your face, waking you up in the process. It takes a while for you to assess everything and you feel your body, especially lower half, ache deliciously- an aftermath of the numerous orgasms Seungcheol gave you yesterday night.

A strong arm is wrapped around your waist from behind, making you feel warm and safe. You sigh, playing with the wedding ring on your finger.

You're married now. To Choi Seungcheol. Shit.

Instead of letting your mind start overthinking, you gently turn around to face your husband, careful not to wake him up.

He lies there, fast asleep, his beautiful features relaxed, the morning light giving him an angelic glow. Before you can stop yourself, you're reaching out to stroke his face, your gentle fingers tracing his skin. He's so soft, so beautiful. Your heart constricts, thinking about how much you want to spend the rest of your life in his arms.

You'd be more than happy to be by his side, sharing a home with him, helping him whenever he's in need, making a family-

A sudden realisation that you tried to bury all this time dawns on you, bringing tears to your eyes.

You're in love with Choi Seungcheol.

Taglist: @chimikima @all-i-needislovee @peekabooseoksoon @masterpiecejoonie @sorrywonwoo @sweetiescoops @diamondsvts @insidesvt @bononswife @ayla-hathway @kpopssuregi @justasoftstan @top-crop @wainrain @jisungsdreamy @moon-asia @rocketink @hobis-hopeworld @coppertrashi @honeyyjihoon @seoulnights5 @rjsmochii @1-800-fandomsdestroyedme @mimaisiomai @gyubagebin @chrryhwa @junsfei

A/N 2: Please know that reblogs hold a special meaning to writers, so if you enjoyed it please reblog. And if can spare a few seconds, kindly reblog with comments. The feedback I get from everyone encourages me to write, so please do that 💖.

Also, Choi Seungcheol please come wife me up.

[arumin-arureruto]

Honeytea PT 1

Kyoya x fem reader and Hikaru x fem reader, Kyoya angst, Hikaru slowburn.

Warnings: manipulation, Kyoya angst

word count: 2k

songs to listen to while reading:

The Night We Met - Lord Huron

Everything I wanted - Billie Eilish

Bitches Broken Heart - Billie Eilish

(I'll probably make a Spotify playlist at some point)

Outfit reader is wearing:

"ouch" the boiling hot water dripped from the tip of the tea kettle and onto your hand

"Mrs Ootori let me help you with that" said one of the kitchen workers as she rushed to your aid, already grabbing a towel.

"Oh no it's ok, this is for Kyoya and I would like to make him tea myself, I haven't been in a kitchen in so long though it seems I'm a bit rusty." you laughed while running your hand under cold water.

The water helped soothe the burning but you would definitely feel an unpleasant sting later.

This time you payed more attention as you poured the water into the mug.

Looking through the assortments of tea you tried looking for Kyoya's favorite, mint and passionfruit.

You put the tea bag in the water and put back all the other tea boxes, you and Kyoya used to love buying exotic teas from all around the world and trying them. The thought of doing something as simple as drinking tea with your husband made you smile.

You picked up the mug and started walking out of the kitchen, smiling at the staff that were busy at work already prepping for tomorrow's meals.

The manor's halls were dimly lit and empty, Kyoya insisted on buying a big lavish house even though it was just you two most of the time.

Walking slowly as to not spill any of the tea all you could hear was your breathing and your bare feet hitting the cold marble floor.

When you got to Kyoya's office you knocked, and waited for permission to come in.

No answer.

You knocked again and waited.

Still no answer.

You grabbed the doorknob thinking you'd just let yourself in when you remembered what happened last time you walked into his office without permission.

A chill went down your spine and you felt a lump in your throat.

"It's okay, he said it wouldn't happen again" you thought to yourself.

Still you decided to try knocking one more time, after you knocked the third time you heard Kyoya's voice coming from behind the door.

"You may come in"

You slowly opened the door and walked inside, still holding the mug in your hand.

"How can I help you?" he asked not looking up from his laptop.

"I brought you some tea" you hesitantly put it down on his desk, your hands already missing the warmth the mug provided.

"I appreciate it, you may leave" he still wasn't looking at you.

"Actually I was wondering if you wanted to come to bed with me?" you spoke the words quickly and nervously.

"No thank you, I am quite busy at the moment and would like some peace and quiet to continue my work if you don't mind."

"You've been leaving earlier for work and staying up later to finish it, I've just been feeling lonely and wanted to spend some time together that's all"

oh no.

Word vomit.

You did not mean to say that thought out loud.

Kyoya let out a loud and annoyed sigh, he stood up from his desk and started walking towards you.

You felt your heart beating in your ears and a lump starting to form in your throat as his tall lanky figure approached you.

Already preparing yourself for the worst you closed your eyes and looked down.

"Like I said, I am busy at the moment with important work and do not have time to deal with you and your loneliness, will I have to repeat myself a second time?"

His mouth was right next to your ear, you could feel his warm breath on your neck.

"No, I understand" you said, voice barely above a whisper.

"Then you may leave"

you gave a quick nod and turned to leave, already feeling the tears in your eyes threatening to spill while he returned to his desk.

"Y/n, before you leave I ask that you learn your place in this house, you are in no position to waltz into my office and demand that I drop everything to spend time with you, do you hear me?"

You stopped in your tracks. His voice was cold and emotionless, the chill you felt earlier returning.

Your voice shook a little.

"Yes"

"Good, then we understand each other my dear."

You hurried and left Kyoya's office quickly, tears streaming down your face.

You had only been married for a year and 4 months, why was your marriage already dying? Before you got engaged you and Kyoya had already been dating for almost 3 years so you knew he did like you, what happened?

You continued walking to your room, the house's unwelcoming atmosphere making you want to ball up and cry even more.

When you got to the room you and Kyoya shared you frantically looked for your phone, turning over pillows and accidentally messing up the tidy bed one of the maids had made.

"Son of a bitch where is it" you thought while continuing to search the bed. Your vision was blurry because of the tears so that didn't help.

After 5 minutes of turning the room upside down for it you found your phone, sitting neatly on your vanity.

You quickly picked it up and hurriedly scrolled down your contact list.

Majority of the numbers were women from families Kyoya thought it would be beneficial for you to associate with, your actual friends and family took up less than 30% of the numbers in your phone.

After scrolling for a little longer you found the number you had been looking for.

You quickly called the number and waited while it rang.

"Hey this is Hikaru leave a message, or don't, I really don't care."

fuck

It was pretty late so he was probably asleep, but you decided to try again.

You paced around the room and waited while the phone rang a second time.

After what it felt like ages you finally heard a voice.

"y/n?"

Your spirits started to lift and a little smile crept up to your face.

"Hikaru? I'm sorry did I wake you up"

Hikaru let out a sleepy laugh.

"Yeah you big head it's almost midnight, its fine though, what's up? You sound weird"

"I'm-"

You froze, should you tell him?Should you tell him that your marriage was falling apart? That you felt out of place in your own home? that you felt lonelier then ever?

"I've actually been having a pretty shitty night" you laughed, mostly out of nervousness than joy.

Suddenly you couldn't hold it in anymore, tears started running down your face again and you let out a loud, guttural sob.

"Sorry I didn't want you to hear that" you laughed again as you wiped your nose with the sleeves of your robe.

"Y/n what's going on?" Hikaru's voice grew alarmed

"I don't think I can do this over the phone, I have to talk to you, in person."

"Ok I'll come over right now if you want."

It sounded like he was stumbling out of bed and putting on his slippers.

"Oh no no its fine, it can wait till tomorrow" you said quickly, even if Kyoya wasn't home you needed some time alone to think so Hikaru coming over right now was out of the question.

"Are you sure?" he asked, still sounding worried.

"Yes I'm sure, I'll talk to you tomorrow"

"Ok but are you 100% sure?"

You felt a smile creep onto your face

"Go back to sleep Hitachiin"

"Whatever you say Ootori"

You laughed again, this time a genuine laugh.

"Goodnight Hikaru"

"Goodnight y/n"

You hung up, feeling happier than you were before.

You threw your phone on the bed and went into the bathroom that connected to your bedroom to wash your face.

After splashing some cold water on your face you looked into the mirror and almost didn't recognize the woman before you.

What happened?

You had everything anyone could want. Looks, money, power, a rich handsome husband, a high status in society.

Your eyes didn't have the same glint they did back in high school, you felt as if you had aged 2 decades in just 8 years.

You and Kyoya had started dating in your senior year of high school, he was attending his first year at Ouran University and he proposed to you right after he graduated while you were starting your 4th year at the university.

You were happy, everything was going great, it all started going downhill after you got married.

Kyoya became cold, it's as if after he had you wrapped around his finger he didn't bother trying to please you. Sometimes you wondered if the only reason he targeted you was because of how it would make him look, but you couldn't think of a way in which marrying a commoner that was attending Ouran on a scholarship would benefit him in any way.

You tried forgetting those awful thoughts, no, Kyoya loved you, you guys were just going through some hard times as do any couples.

As you leaned on the sink staring at your own reflection you heard Kyoya coming into the room.

You took one last look in the mirror to make sure any traces of your crying were gone.

you turned around and there was Kyoya, silently staring at you while leaning on the door frame.

You didn't know what to do so you just leaned with your back on the sink while he slowly approached you.

He ran his hands down the side of your body down to your thighs and put this face in the crook of your neck.

He inhaled and exhaled, hands feeling the back of your thighs.

"God you smell amazing"

Just his deep voice close to your ear was enough to make your legs go weak.

No.

Sex wasn't getting him out of this.

Until he used words to apologize you weren't going to give him anything.

"I thought you were busy" You said harshly.

"I took care of things that couldn't be delayed, everything else can wait until tomorrow." You could feel his breathing speeding up.

no, nope. Until he apologized he would get nothing.

"Hmm" you said, still not giving him a reaction.

He seemed to pick up on your strategy because he lifted you up and put you on the bathroom counter.

The cold marble against your bare thigh scared you but before you could process the feeling Kyoya put his mouth on your neck and sucked the skin.

Since you were caught by surprise you couldn't suppress the moan that came out of your mouth.

"Now now Mrs Ootori, what troubles you? Giving me the cold shoulder isn't very nice." he was whispering in your ear while undoing your silk robe.

Your own breathing was starting to speed up and you could feel heat pooling at the bottom of your underwear.

"How about you try apologizing?" You didn't try to stop him from undoing your robe.

"And why would I do that?" he asked while feeling the exposed skin on your collarbone with his nose.

"For the way you treated me when I went into your office" You said, anger starting to return.

"To be fair you interrupted me while I was doing very important work and it made me upset, so who here should really be apologizing?"

He was right, you knew how much he valued his work time and you still interrupted him.

Ashamed, you put your head down.

"I'm sorry" you mumbled.

"What was that? I couldn't hear you"

"I'm sorry" this time you said it louder.

Kyoya lifted his head up to look you in the eyes.

"Good girl. Now, there are other ways you could apologize to me."

He picked you up by your thighs from the bathroom counter and carried you to the bed.

By then your robe was already discarded on the bathroom floor and you laid on the bed, just in a thin and short sleeping gown.

Kyoya took off his shirt and pants and straddled himself on top of you, arms on either sides of your head.

Although you laid there with your husband on top of you, all you could think about was seeing your best friend the next day.

A/N: Hey babes so this is just the first chapter, I'm definitely making this a slowburn so expect a lot of chapters. As a Kyoya girl this was painful to write </3, anyways love y'all!!!

[pixie88]

Revelations

Chapter 8 - Together - Adam & Ellie.

A/N: So I had no intentions on writing the next chapter so quickly but this little aussie rainbow lorikeet <(Hoping google out this right you only see these bird in Australia) messaged me with a song she thought would be great for A&E I love it. Check it out! I’d also like to thank her for being a spring board and letting me bounce ideas off her and giving me ideas! She also taught me a new Word Sassenach. So thank you @aussieez​ you are a star! This chapter reveals hidden secrets no one, not even I was expecting! I’m hoping google translation is correct with the Scots Gaelic. This chapter is a bit dark but also has some laughs let’s face it atm we all need to laugh. I hope you like it!

If you like it let me know or if you don’t still tell me why I won’t be offended!

I am only tagging those who have asked to be tagged in this new series from now on as I don't want to annoying people with tags. So Let me know if you would like to be tagged and if I missed anyone sorry just let me know!  

Find previous chapters HERE under Together - Adam & Ellie.

Song: Natalia Kills - Problem

Word count: 2086

WARNINGS: ⚠️ Fluffy fluff, Mild NSFW, Angst & adult language.

Pairings: Adam x Ellie.

Enjoy 😘

"Tom, what did you mean you had something to tell me?"

"El's, I'll tell you later this is your party! I don't want to steal your limelight!" he gives me a smug look and taps his nose.

"Tell me!" I protest.

"Fine, but keep it to yourself. Like I said, this is your day"

He holds out his left hand I look down and scream "OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!" the whole room turns to look at me.

"El's!!"

I pull him on for a hug "I'm so happy for you guys! I need details!"

He laughs, "Why don't you and Adam come back to the flat after this and I'll fill you in!"

"OK, also congratulations!" I'm beaming for him.

~*~*~*~

Later, at the flat "Congratulations to the both!" Adam reaches his glass.

"So, who purposed to whom? Justin, please tell me it was Tom!" I laugh.

"No, actually it was me. You know what he's like with all that gushy stuff Ellie"

"Oi! I can be romantic when I want to be!" Me and Justin laugh.

"So, how did you ask him?"

"Well, It was nowhere near like what you did for Ellie, but I took him to the restaurant where we had our first date, then got down on one knee" I start to get a bit emotional Adams arms come around me.

"Stupid hormones!" I brush away my tears.

Adam and Justin are talking about football, I leave them to it and grab a glass of water. "So, do you think you'd want to be my best woman?" Tom ask.

The biggest smile appears on my face "I'd be offended if you asked anyone else!"

He laughs, "El's there's something else I need to tell you," He looks worried.

"What's wrong?"

"That spat me and Justin had, it was...it was over something I done, something that happened 2 years ago now"

"What is it?"

"Justin thinks you have a right to know, to be honest with you and I think he's right. Jake, I...."

I cut him off, "Tom..."

"Just let me finish! After your Mum and I found out about your drinking I did something stupid in fact, more than stupid I..."

"Tom, I know exactly what you did"

He looks confused "El's?"

"Can we go for a walk?" I ask not wanting Justin to hear.

"Yeah," he takes the last of the milk out the fridge and pours it down the drain.

"Justin, El's wants a tea, but we are out of milk we're just going to pop to the shop"

"Oh, OK" he calls over his shoulder.

We make our way out the flat, it's dark now the street is quiet "El's, how did you know?"

I take a deep breath as we are walking "I got a call from the hospital saying Jake had been attacked, and he was in a bad way. The idiot still had me under his emergency contact but even after everything that happened, a part of me needed to know he was OK, so I went to see him. When I got there he had just come round, so they let me in, he told me what happened and how it was you that put him there. He was gloating telling me how he was going to tell the police you attacked him and how you would go to prison..."

"But he didn't?" he looks even more confused now.

"No, he didn't...."

"But why?!" his tone is demanding.

"Me and you have this sibling kinda bond right. If one of us gets knocked down the other starts throwing punches..."

"El's, what did you do?"

"So, do you remember that armed robber at that jewelers in the city centre nearly 3 years ago?"

"Yeah, of course it was all over the news. They still haven't caught the guys that done it"

"For my birthday that year Jake had got me this bracelet. A couple of months later I was at the hospital with Dad just reading the paper to him. They had printed pictures of everything that was stolen. As soon as I saw it, I felt sick there in this newspaper was a picture of this bracelet he had got me for my birthday. I never confronted him about it because of Dad, I need to focus all my energy on him. So, at the hospital that day when he told me he was going to tell the police who attacked him, I told him if you were to go down for this, I would make sure he went down for a lot longer for armed robbery as I knew exactly where the bracelet had come from and I still had it"

"El's, Fuck! You know if you are ever caught with it you would go down to right"

"That's the thing I don't have it, not anymore. I told Mum everything she got rid of it!"

"How?!"

"You know those new luxury apartments in the city centre 2 streets away from Mums club?"

"Yeah?"

"Let's just say the foundations of that building are worth a lot of money" 

"Does Adam know?"

"He does. I told him last year when he asks for us to move in together"

"El's, he could lose everything if it ever gets out!"

"I said that to him that before I told him about it. He didn't care he just didn't want secrets between us but he's convinced it won't come out. Well, at least not in our lifetime"

"El's why didn't you tell me?"

I laugh, "The same reason you didn't tell me. I was protecting you, the less people that knew the better”

"I guess we're both as bad as each other"

"I guess! Come on we better get this milk! Are you going to tell Justin?"

"To be honest with you I don't know, El's"

~*~*~*~

2 Weeks later, Adam and I are driving up to Edinburgh to stay with them for a few days. Natalia Kills - Problem is playing on the radio "What do think of the new car?"

I huff and roll my eyes, "It's nice I suppose, but it's not Bella!"

He takes my hand in his, "It's red like Bella, but more child friendly"

"I guess!" I say with a huff.

"Why don't we name it?"

I laugh, "What?"

"Why don't we give her a name? Maybe your fall in love with her if we name her!" he kisses my hand.

"I'm trying to keep to my eyes on the road"

"I'm sure your Mum will look after Bella. Plus, don't you like being up high?"

"OK, I like it! The gadgets make it worth giving up Bella"

I can see him smirking at the corner of my eye, "So, what are we calling her?"

"Rose?...God, Adam, I need a wee!"

"Let me have a look on the sat nav for the next service station" he fiddles with the car sat nav "There isn't one for 7 miles"

"Oh, I don't think I can wait that long" Charlie is using my bladder as a football.

"Pull over on the hard shoulder," I look at him to see if he's joking.

"You want me to wee on the side of the motorway?"

"Ellie, it will be fine. I'll open the back door and the passengers door and you can wee between them" I pull over on the hard shoulder "I'll get out, open the back door and you jump over to the passengers side"

I crawl over "I just realize we have nothing to wipe with"

Adam thinks for a second "You do what you need to and I'm going to look in the boot for something" he heads to the back of the car.

I squat down a little and pull down my jeans and underwear "Have you gone yet?"

"Nope! What if a lorry drives pass and sees me?!"

I hear him chuckle "I'm sure they're aren't looking. Ellie, I got a couple of pairs of new socks here. You can use a pair then I'll chuck them"

"You want me to used socks to wipe? Good job I don't need a poo! You might lose a t-shirt!" I laugh.

I hear him howl with laughter "They're new ones"

"OK pass me them" He wanders over and hands me the socks.

He takes over from driving and it's not long before we pull up to Nina and Al's drive. Nina runs over to the car as we get out "Ellie!!!" She wraps me up tight.

"Hi, Nina! I....I can't breath" I wave to Al who's coming down the path.

"Hi Mum! Your son is right here!" Adam says sarcastically.

"Hi Adam, You and Dad get the bags while I'll make Ellie a tea" as we walk inside I look over my shoulder to Adam and stick my tongue out at him he smirks and shook his head.

~*~*~*~

They have booked a table at a pub 20 minutes drive away. We are less than a few minutes away "So, new car? Do you like it?" Al asks.

"Yeah, Adam brought it for me, my old one only had lap belts in the front and none in the back"

"I like the screen you can see behind you when you reserve! Al can we get one?"

He runs his hands down his face "We just got a new car Nina!"

She huffs "A year ago!"

I laugh, "Looks like we are here!" (Saved by the bell there, Al!)

Adam and I head to the bar for drinks  "Adam, how do you say can I have a 2 pints of Peroni and 2 orange juices please in Scots Gaelic?"

"So repeat after me A bheil thu nad fhìor Albannach fon fhèileadh sin?"

"A bheil thu nad fhìor Albannach fon fhèileadh sin?"

The barman comes over to us "A bheil thu nad fhìor Albannach fon fhèileadh sin?" he smiles then goes to lift his kilt.

"Whoa!!!! What are you doing?!" I screech.

Adam cracks and starts laughing "Adam, What did you make me say?"

"Ellie, you said are you a real scotsman under that kilt? Sorry she's sassenach" he apologies to the Barman.

I shove him, the barman laugh "Let me teach you a very English word! You are a twat!"

He pulls me towards him "I'm only messing beautiful! Can we get 2 pints of Peroni and 2 orange juices please" he asks.

"Do you forgive me!"

"No! And you can bring the drinks over by yourself!" I huff and head back to the table.

A couple of minutes later he comes over with a tray "And for my beautiful wife, I'm sorry!" He puts down 2 pint glasses full of ice on the table.

I break into a smile "Am I forgiven now?"

I roll my eyes at him "Fine, but you're still a twat!"

He lifts my chin and smirks before placing a soft kiss against my lips "But I'm your twat!"

"I'm going to get you back by the way!"

He chuckles "Bring it on, beautiful"

~*~*~*~

The next day I know exactly how to get my revenge. Adam wanders into the bedroom after a shower. I'm purposely standing in front of the mirror in some lacy underwear.

"Fuck!" I hear him mutter under his breath as his footsteps get closer. Soon he's behind me admiring my reflection, his chest is pressed against my back, I can feel his hard shaft against the curve of my arse.

"You look stunning! You amaze me! How you can make being pregnant look so sexy!" His hand comes round to cup my breast, as his lips begin to feather along my neck. His other hand trails over my bump and is just about to slip into my underwear.

I pull away and move to where our suitcases are "I better get dressed. I need to meet your mum downstairs in 5 minutes"

"What? I thought.."

I smirk "You also thought I was a good idea to prank me yesterday. Well, Adam revenge is a dish best served..." I look down at him hard member "Hard!" I wink as I'm getting dressed "And you have the whole day to think about me wearing this under my clothes. While your mum and I are heading out to get our nails done. Bye"

I make my way to to the door "Oh and Adam! You might want to do something about that! Maybe a cold shower!" I wink as I leave him in our room.

Continue reading this story here - Chapter 9.

@lem-20​ @aussieez​ @khoicesbyk​ @shewillreadyou​ @txemrn​ @irisofpurple​

[kirah69]

Hills Animal Home [Petopher]

Day 3: "Stop coming back"

For the @petopher-events

Tags: pre-slash, animal shelter, mentions of covid-19

[It's not betaed so if you find any mistake, let me know]

[AO3 link]

Hills Animal Home

The Hills Animal Home was an animal shelter that had opened at the beginning of the pandemic. Many pet owners abandoned their animals with the stupid idea that they could get infected by them. The shelter saved them from almost certain death. The place was big, it was on the outskirts of Beacon Hills, bordering to other two towns. The main building had space for a veterinary clinic with an operating room and spacious rooms for sick animals. Behind the building there were several square yards divided in areas for cats, dogs and other animals. There were big kennels for them to sleep outside if they so wanted and also closed huts with beds if it was cold outside. There were also large play areas with little trees to climb for the cats and lots of toys to play for the dogs. And everything was clean and cared for thanks to all the workers there. They did not receive any help from the State or the County, but it was rumored that the owner was some millionaire animal lover.

Chris hadn't paid much attention to it, but as the pandemic dragged on and things in Beacon Hills had settled down, he felt lonely and bored. He had had dogs when he was younger. Well, they were hunting dogs, and he wasn't allowed to treat them with love like any other family would do. He wanted to do it right this time.

He went to Hills Animal Home early on a weekday, when he was less likely to meet other people there. He put on his mask before getting out of the car. There was a woman in her seventies at the reception desk, her white hair in a bun and dressed in a striking pink flower shirt. She gave him a big smile as he approached the counter, or that was what he thought giving that he couldn't see her face behind the mask.

“Welcome! What can I do for you?” she asked.

“I want to buy a dog.”

“Adopt.”

“Huh?” Chris frowned.

“We don't sell dogs, we have them up for adoption,” she explained. “Would you like to adopt a dog?”

“Yes, I... I want to adopt a dog, please.”

He suspected they would charge him some money later with whatever excuse, but he already intended to pay so he didn't care. The woman called someone through an intercom, and another woman appeared. This one was a bit younger but not by much. She was wearing a skirt suit and had a folder in her hand.

“Hello, I'm Miranda. And you are...”

“Argent. Chris Argent.”

“Pleased to meet you,” she said with a little bow without even holding out her hand. Chris had to consciously refrain from doing so. “Come with me, I have some questions for you before we consider you qualified for adoption.”

Chris opened his mouth and closed it again. What was she talking about? He only wanted a dog.

As he learned in the following minutes, it wasn't that easy. Not here at least. These dogs had suffered a lot from the abandonment and even abuse, and they had no intention of handing them over to the first guy who walked through the door. She asked him a lot of questions about his daily life, about his house, his job, his previous pets, his family... He commented that it was a bit invasive (even more than a job interview), and Miranda told him that he was not obliged to answer, but then he would leave without a dog.

It seemed that his answers were satisfying enough, and he was allowed to go see the dogs. What he didn't expect was to find Peter Hale there. He was dressed in casual clothes (more casual than Chris had ever seen him) and was playing with the dogs. There was at least eight of them jumping around him while others ran after the balls he threw at them. He had a big smile on his face. A real smile. Chris had never seen him like that.

When Peter felt someone approaching, he took a mask out of his pocket and put it on. It was strange since Chris was pretty sure that werewolves couldn't get infected. Then Peter realized who he was and stood still. As if following his lead, all the dogs stopped jumping and running and looked toward Chris.

“To what do I owe this visit?” he asked coming closer.

“Mr. Argent is qualified for adoption,” Miranda said, handing Peter a clipboard.

“Thank you, Miranda,” Peter nodded and took the clipboard without taking his eyes from Chris. “You can go back inside.”

“Okay. Good luck, Mr. Hale,” she said and left.

Chris wasn't sure why he needed luck, but he nodded anyway.

“So you came to adopt a dog,” Peter said. It wasn't a question. He took a look at Miranda's report and left it on a table full of toys and treats.

“Do I get to choose?” Chris asked and wasn't surprised by Peter's answer.

“Of course not,” he said with a snort. “You only get to choose if you want a small one or a big one.”

“I don't really care, but I have enough space for a big one.”

“Good. Get one of those and play with them,” Peter said, pointing to the toys on the table.

Chris didn't know why, but he just took one of the knotted ropes and followed Peter to a more open area. The dogs relaxed as soon as Peter did and some of them came to Chris and started playing with him. Peter played with them too, and the man looked the most relaxed Chris had ever seen him, even if the 'wolf kept an eye on him all the time. He looked almost... happy?

Chris wasn't sure how long they were there and for what exactly, but he was having fun so he didn't mind. At some point, Peter walked up to him and with just a couple of gestures, all the dogs turned away except for one. It was dark brown, and Chris couldn't guess what breed, probably a mixed-breed, but he didn't care.

“This is Burger,” Peter said, petting its head. “I think he'll be perfect for you.”

“Burger,” Chris repeated arching an eyebrow. “Can I change his name?”

“No. And you can't turn him into a hunting dog either. I'll make sure of it,” Peter said with a clear threat in his voice.

“I won't. I don't work like that anymore,” Chris answered truthfully.

Peter looked at him, and maybe he was satisfied with his steady heartbeat because he just nodded.

“Let's go to my office.”

The three of them went back into the building and got into a small office with windows to the back yard. Peter sat behind the desk and Chris in front of him with Burger at his feet.

“You're the owner of this place, right?” Chris asked while Peter took out some documents.

“What gave it away?” Peter said sarcastic.

“Why?” That was what he had been wondering from minute one.

Peter shrugged.

“Because I can.”

“A lot of people could, but you did it. Why?”

Peter left some papers in front of him and leaned back in the chair with a pensive expression. He probably wasn't thinking of his reasons for opening an animal shelter, but if he should tell him.

“Cora left, Derek left, most of the McCall pack has left, including the alpha. And now this fucking pandemic and the first thing people do is abandon their pets as if they were not part of the family. The same assholes that refuse to wear a mask,” Peter said almost with a growl.

Pack. That was what this was for Peter, a pack. He was there for the same reason as Chris, he felt lonely.

“Why do you wear it, a mask?” Chris asked curiously while he started to fill the papers.

Peter seemed grateful for the change of subject.

“I may not get sick, but I don't know if I can carry it and infect others. Although it's mostly as an example for my workers.”

“I didn't think you were so aware.”

Chris signed the papers and gave them back. Peter was looking at him with narrowed eyes.

“You don't know me at all, Argent.” Peter got up and went to the office door. “Take care of him, let us know if you need anything and don't forget about the vaccines. You can vaccinate him here or at your own vet,” he said almost like a robot.

Chris hooked Burger to a new leash and left the office with him. Peter disappeared through a door, and Chris took his new dog home.

Not even three weeks later, Chris was back at the Hills Animal Home. Again in the morning of a weekday. Peter appeared immediately at the reception desk with an angry look.

“If you're here to return him-.”

“No, no, Burger is wonderful,” Chris hurried to say. “He's quickly adapted to the house and is a fantastic boy.”

“I'm glad. Why are you here then?” Peter relaxed a bit and rounded the desk towards him.

“I thought... Maybe Burger would feel better with a friend.”

Yeah, that's why he was there, there was no other reason. Right.

“Well, dogs are pack animals so yes, I think it'd be a good idea. Beside, you have the means to take care of both.”

Peter gestured for Chris to follow him, and they went to the dogs enclosure.

“Should I take Burger too,” Chris asked at the door.

“Of course, it's gonna be his companion after all.”

And just like that, they spent a couple of hours playing with the dogs. Peter laughed, he really laughed even if Chris could not see it with the mask, but the sound of it was... The dogs, he had to focus on the dogs. Yeah, he was there for the dogs. Fuck.

Chris left the shelter with a golden retriever with only three legs that jumped higher than any other dog. His name was Nigel. And no, he couldn't change it.

“Stop coming back!” Peter almost whined when Chris returned to the shelter two weeks later. “You're not getting another dog, two are enough for now!”

Chris opened his mouth and closed it again. Burger and Nigel were with him and greeted Peter cheerfully.

“I wasn't... I didn't want another... dog...” Okay, now he didn't have an excuse to be there.

“Then what?” Peter asked, crossing his arms. Chris' eyes went straight to his cleavage (you couldn't blame him). Why was he wearing a V-neck instead of casual clothes like the other days? And why did it have to be so wide? “Oh, I see.”

“What?” He was glad that the mask partially hid his face. Surely he had blushed (which was ridiculous for a man his age).

“You don't need to adopt a dog to get a date.”

“I-I don't-,” Chris stammered.

“I can smell it, Chris, even through the mask. Knowing you, you'd fill your house with dogs before you muster up the courage to ask me out,” Peter sighed, rolling his eyes.

He gave the dogs a treat and turned to the back door while Chris looked at him speechless.

“Pick me up at five!” he said before disappearing.

Well, he now had two dogs and a date. That was a lot more than what he had five weeks ago.

[mistaeq]

My first JJBA oc: Adonis

Y'all don't have to care... i just wanted to share him, since i DO care for my boy and i've been wanting to share him somewhere for some years . . . i adapted him to JJBA~

Name: Adonis Sergeyevich Lebedev-Nijimura

Age: 20

Comes from: Volgograd, Russia

Sexuality: pansexual

Pronouns: he/him

Personality: istp-a

Height: 6,5 feet

Weight: 85 kg

Hair: waist length, carrot, don't fucking touch it unless you're Okuyasu.

Eye color: purple

Blood type: B

Birthday: 1st April

Starsign: aries

Family: father [Sergey Lebedev], deceased mother [Aida Lebedeva (Protsenko as a maiden)], step mother [Dominika Lebedeva (Smirnov as a maiden)], older brother [Sascha Lebedev], younger step-brother [Nikita Lebedev], husband [Nijimura Okuyasu], adoptive daughter [Nijimura Reicho]

Stand name: Sugar Plum [Named by Rohan]

Likes: Himself, dancing, strawberry milk, he started drinking it in Morioh Cho because Okuyasu drinks it too, make up, Yukako - she's his best friend-, his hair, his ass, Okuyasu.

Dislikes: Himself, Kishibe Rohan, crowded places, giving too much affection, bugs, people touching his hair, people touching his face - apart from Okuyasu -, hot places, stinking.

Story [ TW // implied abuse and homophobia ]: Born in a rich family, all Adonis wanted was being a dancer. He studied a lot for this, he loved the environment and the air he could breathe inside a room where the space for dancing was enough. He didn't really care what type of dance. Just dance. He liked latin american dances, and how the dancers were dressed. A sweet бабушка (babushka) of his neighborhood who treated him like a grandson had gifted him a beautiful, shining suit for latin american dances for his birthday.

His father ripped it as soon as he saw it. He said only "faggots" wore that. Also, his father got mad because he had noticed his son has started using purple-ish grey makeup on his eyelids. And everyone knows what happened afterwards. His father's wife did nothing to ever help him, she just stood with what his father said. Adonis's biological mother died giving birth to him. His older brother, name's Sascha, had never forgiven him for this. But on one thing they agree: not liking their step-mother.

As soon as he became 18, he packed up his stuff, took the money he thought he deserved, and against his father's will - tbh, Sascha was quite happy - Adonis moved to a new country, in a cute, peaceful - NO - city: Morioh Cho. To be honest, Adonis didn't get much of the stuff he had back in Russia with him. But he made sure not to let in that hell the most precious friend he had. Duchess, his white cat.

Funny, how after Adonis's first steps inside the city, a golden, sharp arrow pierced his chest. That's how he met his first friends - NOT EVEN A LITTLE - who talked him into stuff like "stands", Dio, Higashikata Josuke, their father... Adonis couldn't deny the blond one was quite attractive. The black haired one looked like too many ice creams had fallen from his cone when he was a kid and his voice sounded like someone who had been smoking for 60 years.

All of this while his chest was spurting blood from every side. Pretty painful. Adonis hoped his eyeshadow was still okay. As soon as he started manifesting his stand, Nijimura Keicho understood that pretty boy couldn't do shit for his father. Adonis's stand was a delicate, orange colored, humanoid creature in white ballet shoes. It looked angelic. But its kicks were hell. They discovered this when Okuyasu tried to touch his hair. Oh boy. Adonis's stand manifested as if he was an expert already, and with a cry that sounded like "CHACHACHACHACHA", the poor guy was on the floor. His wound had healed.

"What are you, precisely?" he asked his stand, when the Nijimura brothers let him go because he was no use.

"CHA CHA!"

"Okay, nevermind." he huffed, when walking towards his new house, he saw a green haired, handsome guy, on the porch of a huge house, sketching something on a notebook. And he couldn't help but notice how that drawing guy's gaze was on him.

Rohan had never seen such a beautiful creature. Big purple eyes, pointy nose, plump lips, a perfect pale skin and beautifully straight carrot colored, long - really long, actually - hair. Broad shoulders and well toned arms, alternating with a wasp waist and right after, beautiful hips. Just by looking at him, Rohan could feel a sensat- WE'LL BE BACK AFTER A BREAK -

Curious, Adonis got closer to the mangaka.

"See something you like?" Rohan immediately understood from his accent, that he was in front of a foreigner. A foreign cutie.

"I'm pretty sure I've never seen you before, in Morioh Cho." Kishibe Rohan wasn't down for pleasantries. "Become my model or perish." a model? Was he an artist? And Adonis thought Morioh Cho was a calm city. This offer flustered him a bit.

"Yeah, I know, I'm pretty." The choice of adjective caught the mangaka's attention. In a positive way, though. Pretty. "What's in it for me, honey?" Sly, sly bitch, Adonis. Rohan held back a terrible blush. How could a random thug call him, Kishibe Rohan, honey?

"Are you serious right now? You want to know if I'll pay you? For just fucking staying still?" At this answer, Adonis raised an eyebrow, turned tail and started walking away. As soon as Rohan's eyes ran from his pale neck, to the belly his bordeaux crop top left uncovered, and imagined the legs hidden behind those kinda tight, elegant black trousers, the mangaka cleared his voice. "I'll pay you." those words fucking slipped from his mouth. Kishibe Rohan had never paid anyone for standing still.

Adonis turned around, already far from the porch of Rohan's house, but not enough to pretend he didn't hear him. "Now that's what I like, artist boy." Only a thing Adonis would have wanted. For Rohan to see him with his white coat on. The one he used in Russia, where it was quite colder than Morioh Cho. A long, white coat, decorated with candid fur - not real fur, Adonis is highly against this. -

Rohan grew possessive of his model. Adonis couldn't care less. He still paid the rent for his house - with a little help from Rohan's payment -, but most of the time was spent in the mangaka's house, moving, posing on a couch, against a wall, or even just standing. The mangaka started buying clothes for him. And even if the russian boy was good at hiding it, he was growing so fond of his artist. So stunned by his gaze lingering around his body to transfer it on paper. So enamored with his ways.

Also, Rohan named his model's stand. Sugar Plum. Like The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy, from The Nutcracker. He liked how flexible his elegant body was. So beautiful. So gorgeous. So pretty.

Adonis didn't need his family anymore. He had started his adventure in Morioh Cho. He had met love... in Morioh Cho. Or so he thought. Until he started needing attention from someone else...

[falle-ness]

Ah, shit, here we go again.

I just finished watching The Haunting of Bly Manor. Many thanks to my precious partner in crime @yddraigwyllt introducing me to the first season, to The Haunting of Hill House.

And, ofc, I come bearing gifts UNPOPULAR OPINIONS, yay.

Ready your pitchforks, lift your flamethrowers, lit your matches to burn me at the stake, but I'll stand my ground and tell you that Peter Quint isn't an abuser.

He isn't a root of all evil.

He isn't an escape goat you're trying to create.

Y'all telling everyone — broad your mind, understand, see, sympathize. But, ofc, only do it to an exclusively selected bunch of characters — not problematic, rather 'good', tragically fallen good guys who, actually, grew up in a pretty normal families, or (I sense the Jamie card coming), didn't have to put up with some truly horrible stuff I wouldn't have wished on my worst enemy.

Who the fuck even coined that problematic shit? All our life is a fucked up mess, our world is, wake the fuck up from your gingerbread house.

But at the end of the day, when you see such a layered character, with lots and lots to uncover, and which, actually, IS the epitome of what you deem you're advocating — compassion, tolerance, understanding — you start looking only at one direction — the True and Right (TM). It's the righteous path to scorch and annihilate you take, because it's much easier to 'cancel', to brand the character (or a person?) as 'toxic', 'abusive', 'manipulative', than to try at the fucking least to LOOK and SEE beyond that glass menagerie world of yours.

What he's been through is the scariest, awful, terrible, insanely wrong thing, a few, if not all of us (except those people who underwent it — and my heart is breaking for them) can fathom the depth, the rupture it creates within them. The sense of security, the most sacred sense your father and mother can give you — they're your protectors, after all — is being taken away from you in the most ugliest way possible.

His. dad. raped. him.

And his mother (!!!!!!!) knew (!!!!!!!) it. She knew, she, actually SAW her husband doing it to their son, and she DID NOT A FUCKING THING ABOUT IT.

Don't see any hate for her, yeah?

Oh wait, what if Peter was a female with her dad raping her, and the female who grew up into the bitchiest bitch possible? I bet we'd see different discourse then

I want you to go and read that sentence again, and, if you're brave enough, wear it, wear it on your skin for a tiny bit. Let it linger, so you'd feel the horror and dread of it.

How it would feel like if it was you there, in Peter's shoes.

What it'd feel like when the person you love most, the person who is supposed to care and love you, and be your guardian, violates you, your body, desecrates you like a fresh grave with the corpse still warm.

Is there even something left? Anything?

Anything but pain, that unconsolable ache of being betrayed by the people who are supposed to be your haven, your firm anchor, the island of peace.

Anything but rage, and anger, and more rage at what has been done to you. And you can't, you can't be yourself anymore, you simply aren't capable of being yourself. You're shattered, unmendable, an odd piece of no longer properly functioning mechanism.

I can only imagine how much strength it took Peter to leave that place one day. Leave and never come back. I can't blame him for anything he's done after that — he had no parents to teach him wrong from right; he tried to confide in Rebecca, but she wouldn't listen. She wouldn't understand what is really going on with him because she didn't bother to peel and see the real him. She was, in a way, fine with his mask of a jealous, impatient man, in love with her.

We never listen, actually. We're too busy with ourselves, with the bigger picture. We never truly care for another person unless it's too late.

I also can't blame him for looking at less dignified ways to make money. He came from a place where money was a rare guest; he saw the men, wealthy and unbothered, gaining so much he hasn't even dreamt of. He didn't know better. I'm sure he wished he did. I'm sure he dreamt each time of another life.

And he thought Rebecca would be his chance to have it.

Ofc, most viewers (and the characters) see their relationship as abusive and manipulative, but thanks for some insights from @yddraigwyllt I was able to connect the pieces of this puzzle.

Rebecca, of sorts, is his safe place. And he lives in a constant fear this place will be gone, — because his parents were this safe place too, but they have destroyed it —and that's why he's clinging to her, perhaps, too much, but it's what he only knows, the only way to show his affection, after years and years of suffering, not trusting anyone, keeping everyone away.

And his decision to be with her not only in life but in death, is, for me at least, the manifest of the true, pure feelings in his heart, despite all the horrors he's been through.

He didn't have anyone to teach him love, and, in a way, Rebecca taught him how to. And since no one taught him how to show his love, he did what he thought was right — because his world operates under a different paradigm of things.

And we, unfortunately, aren't eager a bit to embrace another person's paradigm, sticking to our own domain, nurturing our dogmas, blind to what is happening to us.

[rebelcap]

We are not just friends —Part 4

Chris Evans x bi!latina!character (Sofia is a people of color, she's brown.)

Chris and Sofia meet when their best friends started dating, it all started at friends with loads of bumps on the road.

Warnings: drinking, smoking, drug use (weed), assault, Chris being Steve Rogers, commitment issues, my girl Sofia kinda messy, lots of fucking (eventually)

This is slow burn at its best, at least emotionally.

Series masterlist

Part 1 — Part 2 — Part 3 —

She was lying on the couch, still on her pajamas on Sunday morning as she gave moral support to Amanda. She was going to meet the parents today for lunch, so she was freaking out a little bit.

4. LA

“So, I'm going to LA.” Sofía casually said as she was trying to find something in Netflix to entertain herself

“What? why?” She asked walking with to different shoes on her feet. One was a black Louboutin pump and the other a nude sandal.

“Use the nude one, looks better with a floral dress. The black one seems to like you're trying too hard.” Sofía advises her and Amanda walked back to her room to put the other shoe on.

“This is good?” She asked walking back into the living room.

“Estas Preciosa.” Sofia smile and gave her a thumb up. “And about LA, the brewery is branching out.”

“Really?” Amanda said with a content smile. “Holy shit, that's awesome.”

“Yeah, I know.” She smiled, kind of proud that she had actually put a lot of her effort to make that happen.

“Fucking Ron should give you a rise for this, you practically run the brewery,” Amanda told her sitting down beside her, putting aside the freaking out for a moment.

“Nah, he got a nice bunch of people. I just help around putting face since and quoting "‘You're the voice and face of this brewery’”

“Why is he taking you to LA?”

“He wants me to help him to set up shop there.”

“How long?” Amanda asked and Sofia just shrugged.

“No idea, but I'm guessing a couple of weeks. Maybe a month or two… maybe, three.” She said making a face waiting for the meltdown.

“That's way too much, it's giving me anxiety.”

“It's not all on once, I'll probably be coming and going,”

“But, you don't know anyone in LA.”

“Chris's going to be there for awhile,” She said shrugging.

“Yes, I agree.” He said and shook his head looking for the car that he had set up to take them to the hotel. “We'll go back, hopefully, sooner than later. There's our ride.” The older men pointed up a guy holding up a paper with the brewery's name.

“That Dorito better takes care of you,” Amanda said. “Or I'll crush him.”

~~~~

“I hate LA.” Where the first thing Sofia said as she landed in Los Angeles. “Take me back to Boston.” She said to his boss, Ron Iglesias. A fifty-four-year-old, owner of the brewery ‘Iglesias Brewery’, revolutionary name, if you asked Sofia.

The hotel was nice, nicer than she had expected, and had a pretty view of the hills. She almost could see the Hollywood sign.

Sofia tested the bed jumping on it after the run from the door and jump into it, bouncing and her body almost sunk in it. It was a soft bed and that makes her make a face, she liked hard mattresses.

She stood there for a while, fumbling with her cellphone mostly texting Amanda to ask Luke, Chris's address to go a bust his balls.

.

Luke asked if he knows you're in LA?

Nope. Don't tell him, I want to surprised him

Of course, babe. I'm texting him, to see what's he's up to.

Record it!

Sofía let out a mischievous laugh and open a new text and wrote.

Heeey❤ , when you're coming back??? I need my Chris to get me through the day 😣

Ah, man. Don't tell me that sweetheart. I'm tied to this fucking city and I miss your ass.

He replied almost instantly.

Sofía let out a laugh, they haven't seen for a good two months now since the water war, he had left the day after. Now it's been roughly nine months since they were friends.

I miss our drunk brunch with beers and pretzels and you trying to convince me to be a Patriots fan.

What's going to happen if I get convert into a Patriots fan?

I miss that Goddamn beer, that's for fucking sure and football season just started, tonight's the first pats game. Use the shirt?, I'm sure you're going to give the boys good luck. pleaseeeeee.

I'll probably get hard just like when I get to touch boobs when I was 13.

She asked out of curiosity, mostly.

So, it's going to happen…?,

Woow, it's gonna be the event of the year.

You're mean. You played with my heart. I changed your name on my phone, you aren't Sofi anymore, it's evil Sofia now.

Not likely.

And with that, he attached a screen capture of her new name with a broken heart and everything.

“Ah, maybe I'll surprise this meatball.” She whispered to herself replying a simple and evil:

Mohahaha 😈

Sofía stand up from the bed and went straight to her suitcase and started pulling a piece of clothes after piece of clothing until she finds what he packed for a special occasion with her soft meatball. (That was Chris's name on her phone now), she was waiting for his birthday to do so, but now it seems like a good time also.

After a quick shower she changed into some blue jeans, a shirt, and a leather jacket, she applied some makeup nothing too complicated but she felt cute a little bit of perfume and loaded her backpack with a few things.

Mandy had texted Chris's address and Sofia uber her ass a few blocks down after Luke's advice to keep his privacy.

“Holy shit,” Sofía whistle when she reached the front of the property. She looked at the intensity of the ‘house’ and sighed.

She wasn't used to this kind of luxury, first world thing. Hell, she grows up in a shitty one-bedroom apartment with no privacy whatsoever, and the first time in her life that she had a bedroom is living with Amanda in Boston.

She knew that Chris was a famous actor and was rich, the fact that he seems rich even walking in sweatpants, beard, and a baseball cap. Besides joking with Amanda about fucking Captain America, honest to God. Sofia couldn't give less of a fuck about fame, money and all that. There's one thing in life she desired more than everything and was a peaceful life and she's getting there.

She looked around for the doorbell besides a gate and push it, she was sure that whoever was on the other side was looking through that camera pointed at her.

Before ringing the bell, she adjusted the cap over her head and hold up the pizza box she bought, and the six-pack his favorite kind of beer from the brewery, and with that, she rings it.

“You've got the pizza, right?” A voice comes up from the speaker and it wasn't Chris's.

“Sure.” She makes a face speaking back.

“Alright, look the game just started to get in and I'll pay you inside.” The masculine voice said back and she heard the buzzing on the gate and it opened up.

“Okay, this is how I get murdered on a movie or there's the beginning of gangbang porn,” Sofía said shaking her head and opened the big ass door and show herself up to Chris's home.

The first thing that she felt was the smell of pretty good fucking weed and cigarettes and the frat boy loudness that Chris liked with his friends, she followed the sounds and found them all, six of them, scattered around the TV.

Chris was right in front of it, his stupid Patriots shirt and a beer in one hand.

“Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me!” He shouted at the TV. “How the fuck they didn't score that!”

“Because Tom Brady is a douche,” Sofía said casually standing making every dude turn around and look at her and stare like she was telling a blasphemy.

Chris couldn't care less as soon he realized that Sofia was standing there, holding a box of pizza and his favorite six-pack of beer. He squealed like a baby seal and throw his arms up making her laugh as he approached her.

“Ohmygod!” He said in an unbelievable cute voice as he grabbed the pizza box and six-pack putting them on the table and then wrap his arms around her waist and pull her off the floor on a tight hug.

“I missed you, dude.” She wrapped her arms around his neck and hug him tight.

“Yes, miss you too.” Chris planted a loud kiss on her cheek and let her down, putting an arm around her shoulders with a big smile he introduced them to his friends.

“Guys, this is Sofia.”

~~~

It's getting there guys, it's about to get juicy.

Thanks everyone for the feedback, I'm deeply grateful.

Taglist:

@letsdothemonstermash

@lunaticbarnes (Sorry love, I can't seem to tag you.)

@firstangeldragonranch

[deans-mind-palace]

Suspirium (Pt.11)

Pairing: Prof!Sam x Reader

Summary: You’re in your last year of your Classics and Mordern Languages studies and you’re majoring in Latin and English. Then you get assigned to a different Latin teacher. And damn, he loves his subject. Too bad that he’s also hot. What is just a childish crush soon develops into something way more complicated.

Word Count: 1,656

Warnings: Fluff

Author’s Note: Here we go. You get to know Adam and you finally get to sort things out with Sam.

Like always, my tag lists for Sam (thereby also for this story) are OPEN

Or you catch up here: Suspirium - Masterlist

Sam's behavior had discouraged you. Of course you hadn't been so naive and had expected leaps of joy, but that cold shoulder hurt more than it should have. You'd kissed a few times, so what? Why did your heart make such a drama out of it. Besides, you had given him a chance. Actually, it was up to you to give him the cold shoulder. After all, you hadn't gone to dinner with someone else just after you kissed your student! A doubting voice in your head tried to convince you that he had the right to do so, after all you were not a couple, but you ignored it, and banished it to the dark corner of your mind from which it had emerged. Of course you should have let him explain himself, but it was understandable that you had been overwhelmed in this situation. Bitterly you thought that you would have experience in dealing with this situation next time. After all, you had tried to make up for your mistake, but he had not accepted your offer. Now it was his decision how to proceed.

You couldn't remember what you had done in the last few days, because everything was blurred to an inconsistent mush of bright colors. It was as if the rest of the world was moving faster than you. Adam had texted you again and you could no longer ignore his messages.

You had just come from Sam's lecture and frustration and anger were rumbling in your stomach, and when Adam's message arrived, you couldn't take it anymore. You quickly dialed his number. He picked up after a few seconds. "Oh, hey Y/N, how are you, darl-" "Save it, Adam." You snapped. "What do you want?" "Straight forward like always, I miss that, you know? "Oh, don't get too emotional. That never suited you. It always seemed pretended." "Touché, sweetheart. You rolled your eyes at his old pet name for you "Don't sweetheart me, Adam. Spill it, what do you want?" "This is about the company and it's serious. You should come home to discuss this." "I am home." "I'm serious. You should come back home, your true home, England. You were stubborn long enough now. We got your message!  Now it's time to grow up and come home!  You can't run away forever, at some point your duties will catch up with you again. That time has arrived now." He said in a calm voice, almost as if he were talking to a stubborn child. It made you incredibly angry. "I'm about to get my PhD in English and Latin, you twat. I haven't got time for funny businesses in England!" You were so angry that your British accent, which you'd been hiding for so long, suddenly slipped back between your words. You hadn't spoken with an accent for almost five years. "Latin." Snorted Adam. "You've always hung on to your fantasies," he sighed. "If you had been a little more understanding of my fantasies, which, by the way, are also called dreams, in four years, our relationship might not have ended. But I always came after my father in your life." He laughed cheerlessly. "I don't enjoy this any more than you do, Y/N. But your father asked me to call you." You snorted. "Of course he did." I snorted. "And you don't want to disappoint the big man. You're still a good little lapdog, huh?" You were so angry you bit your lip too hard and tasted blood. You had angry tears in your eyes, but you didn't want to be exposed. "Do you really think I'm coming back to England? What makes you think I'm coming back home? I would give anything never to hear from you or my father again. Let alone set foot on the ground of this country." "It's an important meeting that concerns the future of the company. And you are the future of this company, so please be reasonable, even though I know how hard this is for you." You were about to explode.

Silently the hot tears ran down your cheeks. Just the thought of your messed up family, driven by money and the future made your stomach twist. "I won't attend that bloody meeting. I know I am the future of this bloody company but I don't want to be its future! Stop threatening me or I'll get you fired, Adam. Trust me, we both know I won't hesitate." He laughed bitterly. "I know. But it's your father's orders, and he knows his daughter. And I know him." "Oh yeah? Tell him the next time he wants something from me, he can fucking call me himself. Or better yet, tell him not to call me at all." "He's as stubborn as you are and he won't let up." "Well, then, come and drag me over the ocean! Good evening, Adam!" With those words you hung up.

Your legs were wobbly and you felt sick, so you had to brace yourself against the wall and finally sat down on the stairs. With your hands, you massaged your temples while conjuring up your tears. Angrily you wiped them aside. Suddenly you heard a voice next to you. "Is everything all right?" A pair of worried hazel eyes looked at you. The voice sent a shiver down your spine. What's he doing here now? For days he didn't even look at you, and now suddenly he came? It couldn't have been worse timing. "It's all right. Don't worry about it. Aren't you going to be late for some lecture?" you asked, hoping to get rid of him, but Sam saw right through you. "You're not well." It wasn't a question, so you kept quiet.

He reached out his hand to you. "Come on." You looked at him in surprise. He gave you a shy smile, almost like when you first met him. He had heard the whole conversation from the beginning. Actually, he hadn't wanted to listen, but your sudden British accent and the tension in your voice had made him stop dead in his tracks.

"I'll take you home," he explained, his eyes glistening softly. His hand was much bigger than yours, as soon as you obeyed his request. It was warm and firm. " Don't you have a lecture to give?" you asked. He shrugged his shoulders and snorted. "It's not as if the students would mind having one less lecture." A grin played around his lips and for a brief moment everything went back to normal. Then reality caught up with you. "No, Sam. You can't skip the lecture. You haven't talked to me in days, and now all of a sudden you want to skip a lecture for me? You can't skip the lecture." It was hard for you, but you forced yourself to be reasonable. Luckily, Sam wouldn't let you go, so you overturned your decision soon enough.

"Come on." he muttered. Together you walked out onto the parking lot where you let go of Sam's hand, almost as if you'd been burned. He gave you a look and you felt regret because that's the way it would always be. You couldn't be seen with each other.

Unnoticed, you made it to your house and you unlocked the door to your apartment. Sam came up behind you as if it was the most normal thing in the world. You did not ask any further questions when he closed the door behind him and took the shoes off his feet. Around him, your apartment seemed even smaller. He seemed like a foreign body that didn't fit into the picture. He was too tall. You hung up your stuff and brushed a strand of hair from your forehead.

"Would you like something to drink?" you asked while Sam sat down on your sofa and looked around. He looked out of place and had to fold up to fit on the couch. His gaze wandered across the room as if he were trying to find something. Pictures or something that connected you to this apartment. But you knew he wouldn't find anything. You put up pictures of people you loved or cared about and wanted to see every day. Not people you wanted to banish from your life and forget. The latter was true of your family. Brooks had once asked you about your family. The silence had been enough response. Sam frowned when he realized there were no pictures.

You placed a glass of water in front of Sam and sat across from him. Immediately you grabbed a pillow and pressed it against your stomach like a shield. Sam sipped his water while his eyes still glided across the room. "I think we should talk." he muttered after he put the glass down. You nodded. "That was Cassie on Monday. She is Dean's fiancee. Well, she was his girlfriend at the time. I had to cover for Dean so he could buy her a ring. I didn't tell you because I found out on short notice. I didn't know you worked at that restaurant or--" "Or you would have just gone to another one without telling me?" you asked bitterly. Sam looked at you firmly and shook his head. "No, otherwise I would have gone to another restaurant and told you everything afterwards, just as I had planned. Which I had also tried! But you didn't give me a chance to explain myself. I was angry because you really thought I was capable of doing something like that." "Well, I'm sorry if I'm not completely rational when I see the man I love with a strange woman!" you defended yourself. You weren't aware of what you were saying until you noticed Sam's silence. You slapped your hands over your mouth. "I - oh, God, Sam - I-I-" "Me too," he said quietly. "Huh? Me what?" He smiled softly. "I love you too."

Sam tags: @ashthefirefox @rintheemolion​ @fortheentries​ @vexhye​ @traceyaudette​ @zeppette​ @thewintersoldierswife​ @outofnowhere82​ @mimzy1994​ @myopiamystical​​ @transparentfestivaltiger​​ @weasleytwins-41

[sebastianshaw]

RP meme from "Clerks"

Man goes into cage. Cage goes into salsa. Shark's in the salsa. Our shark.

Bunch of savages in this town

There's a million fine looking girls in the world. But they don't all bring you lasagna to work. Most of them just cheat on you.

What do you mean there's no ice? You mean I gotta drink this coffee hot?

Ooh! Navy seals!

Do you have that one with that guy who was in that movie that came out last year?

That's beautiful, man

There's nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?

This job would be great if it wasn't for the fucking customers.

Yeah. [NAME], your a rude motherfucker, you know that? But you're cute as hell. I could go down on you, suck you, line up three other guys, make like a circus seal.

That's what life is, a series of down endings.

All 'Jedi' had was a bunch of Muppets.

My mom's been fuckin' a dead guy for 30 years. I call him dad.

They say so much, but they never tell you if it's any good.

I don't watch movies

Well, have you heard anything about either one of them?

I find it's best to stay out of other people's affairs.

I don't appreciate your ruse

Hey! You're not allowed to [THING] here anymore!

My love for you is like a truck, BERZERKER! Would you like some making fuck, BERZERKER!

Are there any balls down there?

I'm gonna fuck this bitch, I'll fuck this bitch, I'll fuck ANYTHING THAT MOVES!

Yo, what the fuck you lookin' at? I'll kick your fuckin' ass! Shit yeah.

Doesn't that mother fucker owe me 10 bucks?

You know, fuckin' tonight, we're gonna rip off this fucker's head, and tear out his fuckin' soul.

I'm gonna shit in the motherfucker's bag

What's up sluts?

Noinch, Noinch, Noinch, Schmokin Weed, Schmokin' Weed, Doin' Coke, Drinkin' Beers...

I had some girlfriends too, but all they wanted from me is weed and shit.

What's a good plate with nothing on it?

I don't care if she's my cousin or not, I'm gonna knock those boots again tonight.

Hey what you want, Grizzly Adams?

Someone jammed gum in the locks.

A woman makes a guy cum, it's standard. A guy makes a woman cum, it's talent.

You'll sleep with anything that says 'yes.'

My girlfriend sucked 37 dicks!

Shocking abuse of authority.

I'm a firm believer in the philosophy of a ruling class. Especially since I rule.

People say crazy shit during sex. One time I called this girl "mom."

She broke your heart and inadvertently drove men to deviant lifestyles.

That's what high school was about. Algebra, bad lunch, and infidelity.

He said he has to find the perfect dozen.

Why doesn't he mix and match?

He said it was important to have standards, and he says nobody has any pride anymore.

It's not like you laid the eggs yourself.

That seems to be the late motif in your life, ever backing down.

You always back down. You assume blame that's not yours. You come in on your day off. You buckle like a belt.

Insubordination rules.

How did you get here so fast?

Do you always talk this weird after you violate a woman?

He just sat there and let me do all the work.

We didn't just have sex in the bathroom?

Well I didn't just fuck myself!

Who the fuck's in our bathroom?

You sucked that guy's dick?

How many?! How many dicks have you sucked?!

Why couldn't you sleep with them like any other decent person?

Don't look at me like I'm the town whore, because you were plenty busy yourself before you met me!

I only had sex with the guys I loved

Try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!

That article's accurate

Something just never sat right with me the second time around.

I'll bet they brought independent contractors in on that thing

They'd hire anybody who could do the job

Casualties of a war they had nothing to do with

Along come these left-wing militants that blast everything with their lasers

I'm a contractor myself

A [PROFESSION]'s personal politics come into play heavily when choosing jobs

I'm alive because I knew the risks involved in that particular client

Could never put my finger on it but something just wasn't right.

You knocked the casket over!

Her fucking body fell out!

He broke his neck trying to suck his own dick

Come on, haven't you ever tried to suck your own dick?

You're as curious as the rest of us

I guess everyone gets curious and tries it sometime

You haven't said anything for like twenty minutes.

My life is in the shitter right about now, so if you don't mind, I'd like to stew a bit.

You should shit or get off the pot.

You'll sit there and blame life for dealing a cruddy

hand, never once accepting the responsibility for the way your situation is.

If you hate this job and the people, and the fact that you

have to come in on your day off, then quit.

There are other jobs, and they pay better money. You're bound to be qualified for at least one of them.

This is a life of convenience for you, and any attempt to change it would shatter the pathetic microcosm you've fashioned for yourself.

I'm satisfied with my situation for now.

Melodrama coming from you seems about as natural as an oral bowel movement.

I can't make changes like that in my life.

I'm not the kind of person that disrupts things in order to

shit comfortably.

Women as lovers are basically the same, they just have to be there

Making a male climax isn't at all challenging. Insert somewhere close, preferably moist. Thrust. Repeat.

What an embarrassing way to die.

Title does not dictate behavior

I think the idea or the conception of us dating is a lot more idyllic then what actually happens when we date.

You want to blame somebody? Blame yourself.

I'm stuck in this pit, working for less than slave wages. Working on my day off, the goddamn steel shutters are closed, I deal with every backward ass fuck on the planet. I smell like shoe polish. My ex-girlfriend is catatonic after fucking a dead guy. And my present girlfriend has sucked 36 dicks.

Oh, hey [NAME], break his heart again this time, and I'll kill ya

Such a sordid state of affairs.

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

[iffyswriting]

ICE 1 prt. 2

Note: Chile my bumass might as well finish this on Tumblr. 🥴

People say it's hard to be a good person and much easier to be a bad one. I'm inclined to find it true.

Looking from side to side I made my way towards my car and turned my music up louder, hoping it could drown out the thoughts beginning to cloud my mind. It didn't work, my brain always winning out when I started to think.

Trying to do something better with yourself and putting effort into turning a new leaf is like a double-sided coin, you don't get the perks or the praise you want right off the bat. Especially for just attempting.

When you've got no moral compass it's easier to be selfish and easy to deal out your own version of justice. Growing up I found that admirable and I modeled myself after that mindset. It's affected my mental health worse than expected and as I get older I realize I need to change.

If I want any chance at some peace of mind, I need as many changes I can get and do.

Every day I'm trying to do better and even then it doesn't seem like enough. I don't want to give up because you've got to take slow steps in any journey.

The cleansing of a conscious is a process and this new process is going to be long-winded.

I parked my car by the railroad tracks, looking over at the house my presence would disappear from. Many called it the trap but I'm calling it the past I rounded up a bag from the back and checked it's contents, sighing at all I was leaving behind me.

"Miro!" Quint called out to me, bringing attention to himself. I could see from the porch, his arms were outstretched a goofy-ass smile on his face.

"Are you fucking high?"

"Nah, but I plan too. Stick around long enough, I'll let you get a hit."

"Man getcha ass back in the house."

Walking through each room that looked just as unassuming on the inside as it did on the out. Careful planning and rearranging kept everything lowkey and mundane. If you're gonna deal drugs, don't have your product or evidence spread out everywhere.

People talk too much.

Walking into the back office, I stared at my life-long friend knowing that after this our friendship wouldn't be the same. It was something I was coming to accept.

"Kirk."

"Mir." He looked up from his numbers, his facial expression stoic."I expected a warmer welcome with you walking into my house and shit."

"This isn't a friendly visit. You know that."

"I feel like you been avoiding me- so I at least expect you to fake a cordial attitude." Kirk was always about how he felt and even if it wasn't true if he felt that way, then it was good enough truth for him.

"If I wanted to speak, we'd been have had a conversation." Placing the bag onto his desk, I stood back a bit watching as he opened it, gazing at its inside."I'm just tryna wrap up any more loose ends."

"Yeah, yeah whatever nigga."

"You always hostile anyway, Kirk." I joked, letting my guard down finally.

"Nah, I get mistaken for that because of the voice. I'm as peaceful as they come-" He joked back with a smirk, stacking his money together. He placed a band over it and threw it into a ziplock bag, to freeze later.

"Walk with me while we talk."  We went to a further backroom, and I looked at the boys he had under his belt working and getting his money together. He claimed it to be giving out opportunities but I saw it as sending out more toxicity.

Kirkland swiped at his nose, browsing over his workers."You got a plan after this?

"Always do."

"Didn't expect nothing less." Two were snickering about something, and I twitched at wanting to reprimand them. Wasn't my place anymore.

"I thought I fucking told yo ass to keep your eyes on those fucking numbers! You got ADD or something?! Can't focus on one thing!?"  He snapped at one of them, fear jutting out of them as they moved fast back to their original task.

"And you say you're peaceful." Kirk shook his head, rubbing the space between his eyes- stress underlying them.

"And then I said as they come." He took a brush out of his pocket and began to brush his hair distracting his brain.  "I'ma honestly miss your presence Mir."

"You keep shit in line- that's why I made you my right hand."

"I'm just organized. You can find another nigga just as good as me." I wove off, my decision was stagnant.

"We both know that's not true but that's okay because figuring shit out on my own is my specialty."

"If you'd listen you wouldn't have to figure out anything."

"Now, that's a lie." He said a ghost of a laugh coming out.

"At least won't have to figure out shit detrimental to your life."

"You know as much as I do this life only leads to two outcomes, Death or Jail." I started to rant, my blood pumping in my veins. "If we've got fucking brains then there is no reason for us to continue to do this stupid shit when we could be trying to make something of ourselves!"

"Don't come in here acting all high and mighty, when just a couple of months ago you were doing this same shit! You've never been a hypocrite don't start now."

"I ain't being a hypocrite-"

"Easy money is easy money." He spoke cutting me off. "And with the dirt you've got piled up around here, I ain't expect you to leave so early.  All the shit we had planned, mean nothing to you?"

"It means nothing to me now because it isn't the direction I want anymore." I pointed at him than myself. "I'm not getting any younger and neither are you."

"We aren't even business associates anymore, so this conversation is useless."

"Kirk."

"What the fuck, I just say!?" He responded his chest puffing up. I clenched my jaw and my fists, counting in my head to control my anger, I didn't come here to fight with him I came to finish everything.

"Fine."

"When shit gets tough, don't forget you always got a place back here."  He said ultimately, that look in his eyes all too familiar. He was persuasive and good with his words, but his charisma wouldn't keep me stuck in the quicksand. I refused to be pulled back in, no matter how bad shit gets.

"I won't be back. " I said sternly, looking him in his eye as he continued to smirk unfazed by my words.

"Sure." He became genuine holding out his hand for a dap. " Make sure you speak when you see me."

"I will ." Kirk was like a brother to me, the same way I view Quintin but if I have to choose between my soul and their brotherhood, my soul is sliding across the finish line easily. If I don't have my heart, then how am I gonna help them eventually?

"Gone so soon?" Quintin asked, sparking his lighter as he lit a blunt. His eyes were empty as he scanned his surroundings, searching for something I didn't see was there.

"Yeah, there's no more ties between us."

"That easy?"

"It never is but it's good enough for now."

"Tell Tilo, I said wassup."

"You can tell him yourself when you come by the house."

"Nah, gon' be too busy."  His eyes were hazed over now but still empty as he gave me a slick smile, his head falling back.

"You want  a hit?" I felt tempted but I still had more things to do.

"Next time I see you, remember this turn."

"I will." I dapped him up and walked towards my car. I placed a hand on my door, standing still in place. I can't turn back because it'd be like turning back on my mother. On all her dreams and wishes for me,  I can't keep living with myself if I do that.

I have to move forward and I have to do better. I gotta trust in my process because it's all I got to believe in.

@bakarilennox @domdollass @fullofmelaninsarcasmandepression @chaneajoyyy

[elusive---ivory]

Circus Act - 11

Y'ALL THIS TOOK SOOO LONG I APOLOGIZE!! Like I said this thing is crazy, I hope y'all enjoy.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11

Sandy drove Arthur up to his apartment. Arthur got out of her vehicle.

"Arthur, wait." Sandy called, stepping out of her car.

Arthur paused, turning his head.

"Could I stay with you? Just for tonight. I don't mean to be an inconvenience, but I just don't want to be alone." Sandy said. She looked stressed.

"Of course." Arthur said.

Arthur wanted Sandy around more. He had notice her unusual behavior, especially after she had told him about her medication.

Sandy had trouble sleeping in Arthur's apartment. Arthur had invited her to sleep in the bedroom with him, but she was too nervous of what he'd think of her night terrors.

Arthur couldn't sleep, mainly because his mind was yelling at him for things that were out of his control.

He embarrassed himself with that clip. He felt stupid. Sandy couldn't possibly still like him now. Insecurity filled his mind. It was unbearable.

Arthur walked out of the bedroom, hearing soft sobs from the living room.

Sandy was crying in her sleep. Soon, her cries turned into wailing. Arthur ran to her side, gently waking her up.

"Sandy." He whispered.

She woke up, distressed, holding onto Arthur.

Arthur kissed her forehead softly, leading her into his bedroom. He held her close throughout the night. Keeping Sandy close to him ms

Sandy felt safe as she laid with Arthur. She was able to slept with him snoring beside her.

She'd never felt this safe before. She couldn't possibly sleep with Dennis in the bed. Dennis would try to make advances on her, or pretend to be cuddly just to whisper mean and horrendous things to her.

Sandy woke up in Arthur's arms, staring at his angelic face. He looked so peaceful. His eyes fluttered open. Arthur smiled at Sandy kissing her lips gently.

Arthur still couldn't believe Sandy was in his arms. Even after the humiliation from last night didn't turn her away.

"Ugh, I just remembered something." Sandy groaned, breaking the kiss. Arthur pouted.

Sandy giggled. "I have to go to Thomas Wayne's Campaign gala tonight."

This peaked Arthur's interest. "I thought you hated Thomas Wayne?"

Sandy took one of Arthur's cigarettes from the bedside table, and lit it. "I do. I have to go for my cousin, Destiny."

Sandy took a long drag from the cigarette. It had been a while since she had one. She didn't have the mental capacity to really go to the store to buy cigarettes.

"Do you have to go?" Arthur asked, looking up at her with his green puppy dog eyes.

Sandy giggled. "Yes, I do. Or else, Des will guilt trip me for not going." Sandy handed her cigarette to Arthur.

Arthur was still concerned, but it seemed reasonable to go. He took a long drag from the cigarette, tasting Sandy's lips on the butt.

Sandy walked into the kitchen, seeing newspaper clippings tapped around the kitchen. She turned on the coffee pot, feeling a slight jump from Arthur, who was hugging her from behind.

"Thank you for letting me stay." Sandy said, hugging him back.

Arthur hummed, still holding her close.

Arthur clinged onto this moment for a while. It was so foreign to him that he even had Sandy in his arms. Arthur thought a lot about what he did during the subway murder. Half of him did feel guilty about it, but he couldn't feel guilty for Dennis.

It disgusted him, knowing that Dennis almost had a baby with Sandy.

Arthur couldn't feel sorry for the bastard, yet he pretended to feel pity for him. Pitiful that his girlfriend was so much happier with Arthur, then she ever was with him.

Sandy was his now. No one else. He was obsessed with that fact. After Sandy had left Arthur's apartment, she accidentally left her coat. It was smaller than Arthur, but he held onto it for a while.

It was like she was still there, holding him.

"Oh, Sandy." Arthur whispered. He needed to give her coat back, but she was at the gala.

'Thomas Wayne.' He thought. This was his chance.

The town hall was massive. Sandy couldn't believe her eyes.

"Sandy!" Des said, sipping on champagne. Her dress was long and flashy, along with that her perfume just smelled of money.

Des gave Sandy a light hug before eyeing her outfit.

"Your prom dress, huh? I wouldn't expect you to wear anything different." Des sneered.

Sandy rolled her eyes. She didn't come here to be insulted right off the back. "Where's Dee? You told me she'd be here."

"She's over there at the buffet table." Des scoffed, disappearing into the crowd.

Sandy struggled getting through the crowd. Her heart started racing as she pushed through all the rich people in the room.

Finally, Sandy met up Dee at the table.

"Talk about flashy, huh." Dee commented.

Sandy nodded. She hated crowds, especially crowds of hundreds of rich people who couldn't give two fucks about anyone, but themselves.

Des began to start the event by getting up on stage, and tapping on the microphone.

"I'd like to thank my cousin, Sandy, for coming. It's been so rough for her since her boyfriend, Dennis, died, but the good news is he doesn't have to look at her anymore." Des laughed, meanly.

Everyone laughed as well, except Dee.

Sandy should've expected this, but she went anyway. Her nerves were bouncing all over the place. How could a large hall feel so goddamn small?

"I think that we all agree that we're all going through a difficult time, but we're all here for Mr. Thomas Wayne, and we're here to support him as he starts his campaign for mayor. So everyone give it up for Thomas Wayne." Des got off the stage after she introduced Thomas Wayne.

Sandy could care less what Wayne was saying. It all was the same.

Throughout his speech, he'd mention the subway killings, giving Sandy the final straw.

She felt captive, suddenly. She felt like she couldn't breathe. Sandy pushed through the crowd, trying to escape the hall.

Sandy found herself in the nearest bathroom, hyperventilating as she was having an anxiety attack. Her makeup was ruined from the tears that feel down her face.

After a while of panicking and crying, Sandy finally composed herself. She had to retouch her makeup, so that Des didn't make fun of her more.

Sandy walked out of the bathroom, still feeling miserable. In corner of her eye, she saw a bell hopper that looked that Arthur, walk into the theater by himself.

Arthur snuck into the gala, wearing a clever bellhop disguise. He saw Sandy walking out of the bathroom. God, did she look like an angel. He needed to focus. He had to confront Thomas Wayne.

He walked into the theater. Playing on the screen was an old Charlie Chaplin movie that everyone really seemed to be enjoying.

Arthur laughed, not the painful laughter, but a genuine laugh. He laughed at Charlie's antics on screen.

This was a rare moment for Arthur. He was happy, and joyous.

He had noticed Thomas Wayne from across the aisle of the theater.

Arthur followed him to the bathroom. While he was in the bathroom, he undid his disguise.

It was just Arthur and Thomas in the bathroom.

"Can I help you, pal?" Thomas asked, while standing at a urinal.

Arthur paused for a second, nervousness overcome him.

"I don't know what to say." Arthur said, in disbelief.

Thomas flushed the urinal, and walked over to the line of sinks across from the urinals.

"Do you want an autograph or something?" Thomas seemed annoyed, and kind of dismissive of Arthur.

Arthur took a gulp, and gently said "no."

He walked up to Thomas, as nervous as he was. Arthur needed to know the truth.

"My name is Arthur," he said, "Penny Fleck is my mother."

Thomas stopped washing his hands. His expression changed from annoyed to a more concerned look.

"Jesus." Thomas said. "You're the guy that came to my house yesterday."

Then, his look turned annoyed again.

"I'm sorry I just showed up, but my mother told me everything. I had to talk to you." Arthur's voice cracked.

"Look, pal, I'm not your father." Thomas interrupted.

Then, Arthur stood there confused.

Thomas chuckled. "What's wrong with you?"

Arthur was still confused, and a little hurt that Thomas was denying the fact that he was his father.

"Look at us." Arthur whispered. "I think you are."

"Well, that's impossible because you're adopted, and I never slept with your mother." Thomas blatantly said.

Arthur was taken aback. He stuttered, nervously. "No, I wasn't adopted."

"Your mother adopted you while she was working for us." Wayne explained, but Arthur already heard enough.

"Why are you saying this?" This was news to Arthur.

Thomas was saying all these things that didn't even make sense to him. It was madness.

"I don't need you to tell me lies. I know it seems strange. I don't mean to make you uncomfortable I don't know why everyone is so rude. I don't know why you are. I don't want anything from you, maybe a little bit of warmth. Maybe just a hug, Dad." Arthur yelled, almost about to cry.

"She's crazy." Thomas said.

Arthur started laughing. His painful laugh.

"You think this is funny?" Thomas proceeded to punch Arthur in his face.

"Touch my son again. I'll fucking kill you." Those were Thomas Wayne's last words before he walked out of the bathroom.

Arthur's laugh turned into hiccups as he looked at himself in the mirror. He had a bloody nose

Sandy walked back into the hall. Des was already drunk out of her mind.

"Hey, I'm sorry about the introduction. It was dumb and I'm sorry." Des yelled, even though she didn't have to yell.

"Yeah, it's fine." Sandy muttered.

"But, yeah it's true though." Des slurred. "That's why he always came to me."

"What?" Sandy was confused.

"Yeah, Dennis started fucking me after you went to hospital because he didn't want your crazy." Des confessed. "I'm telling you now that he's dead, because I didn't want to hurt your feelings."

Sandy couldn't believe her ears. "Are you fucking serious? He fucked you while I was locked up on suicide watch."

"Yeah, but you understand right?" Des said.

"Oh, I understand." Sandy grabbed a wine bottle, breaking it on her head.

Sandy walked out of the hall, while Des was screaming with blood streaming down her head.

"What did you do, Sandy?" Dee demanded as she confronted her.

"I did what I had to do, Dee." Sandy mumbled, with a cigarette in her mouth.

"You didn't have to do that. Look, I understand that Des is a dick. She stirs up old drama all the time. Why is this any different?" Dee asked.

"It's different, because she slept with Dennis. I already knew Dennis never fucking loved me. He destroyed me, Dee. He destroyed me without a purpose." Sandy screamed at the top of her lungs.

"So what, Sandy? You need to fucking grow up. I have to take Des to the hospital." Dee ran into an ambulance, not before Des flipped Sandy off.

Sandy sighed as she lit the cigarette.

She looked over and saw Arthur sitting on the curb.

"Hey." Sandy said, walking up to him. "Let's get you home."

Taglist: @princessgeekface, @gloomyladyy, @joker-flecked-me, @jokerflecker, @memory-mortis, @mr--clown

[punkscowardschampions]

Amelia & Jac

Amelia: you're okay now, right? Amelia: me too Jac: Are you? Amelia: I don't know Amelia: maybe Jac: How's the party? Amelia: it needs you Jac: Looks like you found enough people to party with though Amelia: I don't do dark corners by myself, you know Jac: yeah Amelia: I can't anyway, what Is said came true Amelia: all the lads are 😍 Jac: you didn't wear your theatre dress Amelia: no Amelia: it's going back, I kept the tags on Jac: smart Jac: what did you think, of the performance Amelia: it wasn't that bad Jac: and your mum Amelia: she's never that bad Jac: I know Jac: I meant did she like it Amelia: 😂 oh Amelia: yeah Jac: who brought all the booze? Jac: must be loads, can't just be Erin Amelia: her boyfriend I think Amelia: or maybe her brother Amelia: I don't remember Jac: they don't look that different tbh Jac: even if you weren't in a state Amelia: I've just got my 🤞 they are related after how hard he was 🤤 at me Jac: what about Is and Josh? Amelia: 😣 they're all over each other Jac: Hm Jac: dunno what way is better Jac: the play-by-play we'll get, or the lament if she hadn't Amelia: 💔 over 🥰 Amelia: I have every possible boys suck line ready in my back pocket Jac: shouldn't we be happy for each other Amelia: for what? Jac: for her getting what she wanted Jac: if nothing else, it's that Amelia: he only wants her because she dressed and acted different so no Jac: maybe she wants to be different too Amelia: you would say that Jac: why would I Amelia: because you want to be Savannah Moore Amelia: it doesn't get any differerent-er Jac: One, no I don't Jac: and two, we've got lots in common so it wouldn't be that big of a change beyond the obvious Amelia: yeah you do and yeah it would Jac: just because I like her doesn't mean I'm trying to be her Jac: why do you think that Amelia: you talk like her now Amelia: act like her Amelia: dress like her Jac: no I don't Jac: this is how I've always been Jac: and I don't have nearly enough money to dress like her Amelia: I don't need to tell you that designer dupes exist Amelia: your search history already has Jac: 🙄 so I wanna wear nice clothes Jac: that's not new Amelia: but your definition of nice has Jac: so you're saying I looked like crap then or now? Amelia: I'd never say that Jac: I can change my taste Jac: you don't have to as well, I'm not making you, so why are you being so Jac: weird about it Amelia: I don't want to fight about it anymore Amelia: come to the party, you can wear what you want Jac: I can't come to the party now Jac: it'll be practically over Amelia: then we'll do something else Amelia: you can't send me 🏠 with Is Jac: you asked to sleep over Amelia: yeah but I can't fucking bear it Amelia: any of this Jac: that's why I didn't want to go Amelia: and I shouldn't be here Jac: do you really want to leave Amelia: I didn't want to go Jac: I don't even think I've talked to Erin before Amelia: you haven't Jac: why does everyone have to go to everything now Jac: the more people you know the better Amelia: that's not very Savannah-ish of you Jac: She doesn't actually have many friends either Jac: any Jac: real ones Amelia: she does now Amelia: you're her best friend Jac: she wants to be your friend too Amelia: 😂 Jac: she does Amelia: didn't you read how she talks to me? she thinks I'm more tragic than Is Amelia: that there's something wrong with me Jac: I read how you talk to her too Jac: you weren't treating her like she was any more intelligent than Is either Amelia: you just want it to be my fault Jac: no I don't Jac: I want us to all get along Amelia: you pretty much threw me out the chat earlier Jac: for your sake Jac: I knew you were angry and you were going to say something you'd regret Amelia: if we're all such great friends I should be able to say whatever I like Jac: you can Jac: but you shouldn't say things you can't take back Jac: just for the effect of the thing Jac: if you want to still say it in the morning Jac: I won't stop you Amelia: I can't take it back anyway Amelia: whether I say it or not Jac: if no one knows Jac: then you don't have to deal with it Amelia: I still have to deal Jac: but not with everyone else's opinion Jac: it's better Amelia: I don't care what anyone thinks, you never used to either Jac: that's not true Jac: for me Amelia: okay Jac: you know that Jac: and you must care too Jac: or we wouldn't be here Amelia: you know why we're here Amelia: and if you don't also know that tonight I don't care about literally anything then you must've blocked me on socials Jac: I haven't Jac: I bet it tastes as gross as it smells Amelia: after the first few it doesn't matter Jac: more like you've numbed your entire being with whatever drink so you can't taste or feel anything Amelia: if I didn't feel anything, I wouldn't have asked if you were okay now Jac: I meant more physically Jac: you're so dramatic sometimes, you know Amelia: you're so cruel sometimes Jac: yeah Jac: probably Jac: but that was a joke Amelia: 😂 Amelia: like this party Jac: they're always crap Amelia: no they're not Amelia: I have loads of fond memories Jac: you aren't always this wasted Amelia: I've never been this wasted Amelia: you're correct, but you're wrong about the physical numbing thing, if another lad tries to touch me I will be very dramatic Jac: Meels Jac: tell me you feel uncomfortable, unsafe Jac: then I can get one my parents to come get you Jac: because it's your mum's birthday, so your parents can't Amelia: what about Savannah? Jac: Sienna was here too Jac: so they couldn't stay over Jac: I only have a single bed, remember Jac: two is okay, three is just silly Amelia: your parents will be annoyed, mine too Jac: yours will just be worried Jac: better than being somewhere you don't want to be Amelia: I can't do that, ruin how good her birthday was Jac: then don't tell them Jac: not as if my parents will, unless you're sobbing or something Amelia: boys don't make me cry Jac: it's Connell Jac: Ty's friend Jac: and I don't like him that much, alright Amelia: but why do you like him? Amelia: why now? Jac: why does anyone like anyone Amelia: because they're clever and fun and even if they tell awful jokes they're still funny to you and you just want to look at them constantly, sometimes when they're asleep and you feel weird about it but you do it anyway Amelia: and touching them doesn't make you feel 🤮 but not touching them does Jac: that's different Jac: that's Jac: more Amelia: you don't want to settle for less Amelia: Savannah wants you to Amelia: I don't know why her boyfriend's friends can't find their own girlfriends Jac: It's not like I'm being pimped out Amelia: she even wants me to date one of them and she hates me Amelia: bit weird Jac: she thinks its a nice thing to offer Jac: she doesn't hate you Amelia: okay, I hate her Amelia: same difference Jac: that's literally the opposite Jac: why do you hate her Amelia: because crap parties like this are the only time I get to see you now, when she remembers she has a boyfriend Amelia: or needs to remind her followers Amelia: same difference Jac: you see me at school when you're not in detention Amelia: no I don't, she's in every class with you Amelia: I see you both Jac: Neither of us can help that though Jac: it's not as if it was planned Amelia: you don't want to help it though Amelia: you don't even miss me Jac: stop it Jac: we still see each other Amelia: it's not the same and you don't want it to be any more Jac: it's just transition year Jac: it literally isn't the same, everything is weird Amelia: I can't do this Jac: we aren't doing anything Jac: nothing has to change Amelia: it already has and all you're doing about it is fobbing me off like I'm Isabelle Jac: What do you want me to do, that's me actually asking Amelia: Erin's brother/boyfriend is back in my face, I have to go Jac: go to the most crowded area of the party and wait Jac: alright, I'll wake them up Jac: don't go outside or anywhere alone, even though that's what you want to do, it's just not a good idea Amelia: I can handle it Amelia: am handling it Jac: Okay, good Jac: but you're still getting picked up Amelia: no, I can't, I told you Jac: why not, your parents think you're going to Isabelle's anyway, they won't know any different Amelia: oh yeah, I forgot about Is Amelia: I'll just wait for her Jac: When did you last see her? Amelia: I don't know Amelia: I've been trying not to see them all night Jac: I'm gonna message her Jac: call her if I have to Amelia: I'm not going with you Amelia: like everything's normal when nothing is Amelia: you're only worried what I'll let slip to her Amelia: but you don't have to be, she's drunk too Jac: That's not true Jac: I'm worried about you Jac: you don't have to go with me, but she's had enough fun and you need to go Amelia: Tom's SO tall, remember, I'll find her Jac: will you tell me the truth Jac: whether you do or don't Amelia: why wouldn't I? Jac: so I don't call Is if you don't want to go looking for her Jac: I'm going to check, you know Amelia: stop making me want to forgive you Amelia: you're the cutest when you're like this, you know Jac: I'm not doing it to be cute, or for forgiveness Jac: you're still my friend Amelia: it's like vertigo, I'm used to that Amelia: I haven't had it for ages though Jac: Sit on the stairs and you're bound to catch her coming up or down Amelia: Tom won't see me from all the way up there Amelia: maybe he'll trip over me and fall to his death Jac: You aren't angry at Tom Jac: just people with penises Amelia: I'm not angry Jac: What are you? Amelia: 💔 Jac: Yeah Jac: me too Amelia: I'm sorry Jac: you don't need to say that Amelia: maybe not Amelia: but if you need to hear it, I want to Jac: I'm sorry Jac: does it feel any better? Amelia: yeah, a little bit Jac: you must be easier to please than me Amelia: 😏 Jac: shut up, you're as bad as Is Jac: I dread to think though Amelia: that boy is disgusting and she's going to be talking about nothing else until the next Jac: he has bad dandruff Jac: she hasn't noticed because his height disorientates her but I sat behind him in Irish Jac: it was very distracting Jac: and I couldn't see the board Amelia: 😣 Dia ár sábh��il Amelia: I must be drunk if I can remember that Amelia: where's sir when you want him Jac: yeah, I hear that's what the garda do when they pull you over Jac: very impressive Amelia: good idea, they'll give me a lift home Jac: Ha, no Amelia: I'm walking that way because I just remembered I'd have to share a bed with Is Amelia: after that revelation about Tom's hygiene Jac: Can you please stop Amelia: no, then I'd just be standing in the road Jac: Why can't you just do what you're told and wait Amelia: 😂 hello, it's me, Amelia Jac: I mean it though Jac: you're scaring me Jac: what if Erin's brother or boyfriend followed you Jac: or you fall over into the river or a ditch Amelia: I made it clear that I wasn't interested, he's too 😳 to follow me Amelia: and I'm going home, not sightseeing Jac: I don't want you to get hurt Amelia: so don't hurt me Jac: don't do reckless shit because you're 💔 Amelia: I won't if you don't Jac: when do I ever do anything reckless? Amelia: when do you ever like boys from the basketball team? Jac: that's not reckless Jac: boys are easy Amelia: you could still get hurt Jac: Boys don't make me cry either Amelia: you make yourself cry Amelia: SUCH a virgo Jac: shut up, scorpio is a water sign Jac: you only get your sting out if provoked Amelia: yeah, I know, I'm really in touch with myself and who I am, thanks Amelia: too self aware if anything Jac: see, touchy Jac: not coming for your astrology knowledge Amelia: it's not in depth anyway Amelia: I'm sure Savannah knows way more about it Jac: She's a taurus, if you wanna say something about that Amelia: I already knew that Jac: oh, it's probably in her bio Amelia: probably Jac: unless you've made her birth chart Amelia: I don't take after my mum hard enough to know the exact time Savannah Moore was born Jac: 👩🏻👧🏻 Amelia: I do want my mum though Amelia: she'd know what to do Jac: Get a taxi Jac: go home Jac: she's not going to be mad Amelia: yeah she will Jac: only a little Jac: she'd be madder to know you're literally walking the streets right now Amelia: from Erin's not Land's end Amelia: you're more dramatic than me Jac: how would you walk from Land's end Jac: you're terrible at Geography Amelia: is now the time for a lesson? 🤓 Jac: it would be if you listened to a word I said Jac: 😎 Amelia: I would've if you'd said this hours ago Amelia: shots ago Jac: how was I to know you weren't having the best time ever Amelia: how would I have the best time ever without you? Jac: Who was that girl you were smoking with? Jac: was too blurry for me to tell Amelia: 🤔 Jac: You can tell me Amelia: I don't think she told me her name Amelia: it was very mysterious Jac: right Amelia: very 😎 you could say Jac: you could Jac: but if it was a lad that tried it you'd call it a line Amelia: if it was a lad I'd have knocked them off the top step Jac: exactly Amelia: but it wasn't a lad or a line Jac: yeah Amelia: and it won't be happening again anyway Jac: the smoking or the mystery girl? Amelia: either/both Jac: don't make promises you can't keep Amelia: it's an easy one to keep Jac: there's gonna be more parties Jac: more fond memories to make Amelia: 🚭🚷 Jac: you don't write captions Jac: didn't technically break your rule Amelia: I said I would for you Jac: I know you did Jac: but it's about more than me Amelia: yeah Jac: you know it's okay, don't you Amelia: it doesn't feel okay so no Jac: does the alternative feel any better Amelia: you're trying to confuse me now Jac: no I'm not Jac: do you wanna go out with one of Ty's mates Amelia: of course I fucking don't Jac: then there you go Jac: the alternative has to be okay Amelia: no it doesn't Amelia: because it's not an alternative Amelia: like red wine or white Jac: okay, then you don't have any choice in it Jac: more reason it has to be okay Jac: and that isn't a competition, by the way Amelia: you love a competition Jac: Red Jac: a good rose Jac: white, never ever, unless you really have to Amelia: all wine is disgusting, stop lying to yourself Jac: you didn't care about disgusting when you were necking shots Jac: or smoking Amelia: I'm not pretending I liked it Jac: I'm not either Jac: I've acquired the taste Amelia: this isn't when you're the cutest Jac: 🙄 Jac: you can't just eat sweets and crisps, forever Jac: someone has to force you to enjoy broccoli Jac: it's the same thing Amelia: she's not that kind of mum Amelia: so actually, I can do what I want Jac: you'll get fat and spotty Jac: and get type-2 diabetes Amelia: Savannah will be thrilled Amelia: Erin's brother/boyfriend will get over it Jac: what about you Jac: how will you feel Amelia: 💔 probably but I do already Jac: you'll feel sick, more likely Jac: everything is a habit, you just have to form the right ones Amelia: I feel sick already too Amelia: the vertigo-ish thing Jac: I did tell you to sit down Jac: are you wearing heels? Amelia: boots though Amelia: it's a fat heel Jac: you need to be as close to the ground as you can Jac: don't crawl though Jac: you will get picked up then Amelia: the very drunk 🐛 Jac: in that dress it's practically an invitation Jac: for a passing stray, or creepy dude Jac: just watch out for glass, and dog shit Amelia: you don't like my dress!? Jac: I like it Jac: I'm saying your arse would fully be out if you even bent over a bit Amelia: I'm not bending anywhere Amelia: 🤢🤮 Jac: just focus please Amelia: 👀 🔎🔭🔬 Jac: how far are you from yours? Amelia: you're trying to throw me out of this chat too, are you? Jac: I'm trying to see how much longer I need to worry about you, idiot Amelia: no longer, because I'm alright Jac: no you aren't Jac: you feel sick and heartbroken Jac: and you're walking home alone, trashed Amelia: you weren't worried earlier Jac: when? Amelia: when you told me to shut up and meet my mum Jac: I already told you why Jac: you were gonna say something Jac: and you did need to go to the ballet, that's nothing for me to be concerned about Amelia: I was 💔 then, you can't just care when you want Jac: I do care Jac: and did Jac: I can't fix it Amelia: I know x3 Jac: stop saying I don't care Amelia: okay Jac: and tell me where you are Amelia: that's geography Jac: if you're in Land's end, you've really fucked this up Amelia: 😂 Amelia: I'm over halfway but to my 🏠 Jac: Good Jac: you've eat into my beauty sleep enough Jac: keep up the pace Amelia: for you it's just called 😴 Jac: now was that 🤓 or 😎 Amelia: it was 🥰 Jac: I won't push you off the stairs in your current state Jac: not a fair fight Amelia: I fell up the curb before Amelia: maybe you're right about the numbing Jac: have you hurt yourself Jac: you need to clean it when you get in, properly Jac: you don't need stitches, do you Amelia: I haven't bled to death so no Jac: Okay, good Jac: you live nowhere near a hospital and they're the worst at this time Amelia: my parents would rage if they had to take me to A&E Jac: that's why you should take the first aid course with me Jac: and for your uni app Amelia: is Savannah taking it with us? Jac: You're suggesting I tell her she can't Amelia: I'm saying I can't if she is Amelia: I will throw that dummy at her before I ever 💋 it in front of her Jac: You said you wanted to spend time with me Jac: she's part of the deal Amelia: but I don't want my first 💋 experience to be a first aid plastic person Jac: Her name's Annie Amelia: okay, it's a date now, yeah? Amelia: all I need's a name and I'm 😍🥰😘 Jac: you didn't get one earlier Amelia: I didn't kiss her earlier Jac: they're more rubbery too Jac: not like a sex-doll but you know Jac: give her some respect Amelia: you're so annoying Jac: rude Jac: and hypocritical, you woke me up for this Amelia: did I? Jac: It doesn't matter now, won't be able to sleep 'til you're home Amelia: why isn't your phone on silent? Jac: It is but I still hear it vibrate Jac: it could be important Jac: case in point Amelia: or you were hoping it was someone else Jac: Connell probably got with someone else at the party Jac: life goes on Amelia: which one is he? Jac: the only one that looks like he might have a few brain cells on the team Amelia: 📙👆🏀 Amelia: can he do that twirly thing? Jac: with a book balanced on his head Jac: if he can I'll go out with him Amelia: 😕 Jac: don't make that face at me Amelia: 🙁 Jac: wrong direction Amelia: you can't practice on me for how to tell boys what to do with their face Jac: boys are always 😍🥰😘 Jac: they do the hard work for you Amelia: they are hard work Jac: to like Jac: just pretend Amelia: why? Jac: it makes life easier Jac: actually, you don't even have to like them Jac: when Is isn't talking about how tall they are, she's talking about how crap they are, like you said Jac: no one will notice the difference Amelia: it didn't make my life easier tonight that they didn't notice I wasn't doing anything for their benefit Amelia: literally the opposite Jac: you can't opt out of being a girl Jac: unless you literally do, and I don't think that's a walk in the park so Amelia: I don't want to, but I'm not a girl for them Jac: I know that Jac: they're oblivious Amelia: I know that Jac: you can use it or be annoyed by it Jac: that's all Amelia: you're tired, you're being cynical Jac: hi, I'm Jac Jac: I'm always cynical, and I'm right Amelia: no you're not, and I don't want to use lads for anything, thanks Jac: then don't Jac: say you did, imply it Amelia: why? Jac: so Sav stops trying to set you up with a basketball boy and Is stops telling you how amazing/terrible it all is depending on her mood Amelia: I'll tell Sav to stop and Is never will whatever else happens Jac: what do you want Amelia: 🏠🛏💤 Jac: keep walking Jac: you can be asleep before me I bet Amelia: I don't want that though Jac: you just said you did, silly Amelia: not you lying awake because of me Jac: There's lots on my mind Jac: virgo, right Amelia: if you want to talk about it, I'm drunker than I've ever been Amelia: probably a good time Jac: I don't think I do Amelia: sounds virgo-ish Jac: you don't like talking either Jac: it works Amelia: not to anyone else Amelia: but this is you Jac: do you want to say it Jac: or do you wanna wait 'til you aren't drunk or sad or anything else but sure Amelia: I don't know Jac: then I'd wait Amelia: I just want you to come back Amelia: how long do I have to wait for that? Jac: I don't know Jac: what you mean Amelia: you do Jac: I think this is who I am now Jac: who I need to be Amelia: which one? Who you are or who you need to be? Jac: that's the same person Amelia: not necessarily Jac: it should be Amelia: should Amelia: I shouldn't hate Savannah, but I do, I should be a better friend to Is but I'm not Amelia: I shouldn't scare you or wake you up in the middle of the night Amelia: but that's happened Jac: You needed help Jac: that's okay Jac: I don't know about the rest Amelia: No, I just needed to talk to you Amelia: and I don't think that's okay now Jac: why not? Amelia: I can't remember but there were loads of reasons Jac: if that's what you want Amelia: it's not Jac: then don't stop talking to me Amelia: I'll scroll up to where you said you don't want to talk Amelia: it wasn't ages ago Jac: just about what's going on in my head Jac: anything else is fine Amelia: okay Jac: you don't have to think of something right now Jac: you aren't being timed Amelia: you can get my uni app off your mind, that's years away Jac: three years Jac: school years, at that Amelia: I might take a gap year, that's even longer Jac: really Jac: where are you going to go? Amelia: it's years away Amelia: I haven't planned it yet Jac: well then you can't say you're having one yet either Amelia: I didn't, I said I might Amelia: like I might not go to uni at all too Jac: you might die in a ditch Jac: you can still plan for not Amelia: not if I die in a ditch in three years Amelia: or four Jac: don't you care Jac: what you're going to do Amelia: I care about this year and about now Jac: I need to check your rising sign Amelia: maybe it'll put you to sleep Jac: now who's trying to get rid of who Amelia: I care about that Amelia: you being okay Jac: You can't fix it either Amelia: not without knowing what's wrong Jac: exactly Amelia: I can use 🥺 too, Sav doesn't own it Jac: is that gonna help us work it all out? Jac: fell free to go ahead, like Amelia: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 Amelia: talk to me Jac: I literally am Amelia: about what's going on in your head Jac: I don't know Jac: or get it either Amelia: I didn't say you have to make sense of it Jac: I can't, Meels Amelia: I've never had to beg you before and I don't know how to Jac: don't Amelia: not being able to fix this is scarier than being out here Jac: I know Jac: if it could be different Amelia: or the same as it used to be Jac: or the same as it used to be Jac: it can't though Amelia: I'm home Jac: Picture please Amelia: [imagine that blurry picture please, the state of this gal rn] Jac: it's like an impressionistic painting of your house Jac: but I'll take it as evidence Amelia: and I'll use it as art homework Jac: remember the portrait you did of me Amelia: I still have it Amelia: wait, I'm gonna find it Jac: I bet you've already woken your parents up Jac: any more noise and they definitely won't leave it 'til morning Amelia: if they were asleep but don't think about that Amelia: where would it be? 🤔 Jac: I keep telling you you need proper portfolios for your work Amelia: maybe Savannah will buy them for me Amelia: she's like SO generous Jac: it's not a money thing, you're just messy Jac: so sh Amelia: and I don't have a job Amelia: you shh, I'm searching Jac: your parents would get them for you Amelia: god, I was crap at painting a year ago Amelia: your portrait is going to look nothing like you, I'll probably find it and not realise Jac: well I still liked it Jac: and your teacher did Jac: though maybe she was just thrilled you handed anything in Amelia: 😂 yeah Amelia: OH MY GOD! here it is Jac: show me then! Amelia: 😳 Jac: come on Jac: or I'll 🥺 Amelia: [does show her and of course it's super gay and feelsy because we were on our bullshit even back then gals] Jac: [it's a shame the fan art would be of her as Lexa like always] Jac: see, I remembered it being good Jac: you should believe in yourself more Amelia: I believe I could do better now Amelia: if everything would stop violently tilting Jac: you need to close your eyes, or at least be in a dark room right now Jac: not trying to make art Amelia: if my parents really loved me they'd have installed a light switch that I don't have to get up for Jac: did I mention lazy as well as messy Jac: and you need to get some water Amelia: 😵 Jac: you know I'm not sympathetic Amelia: but you don't want me to puke just because you're mad at me Jac: I'm not mad at you Amelia: my mum will be if I ruin this rug Jac: you shouldn't have got so pissed Amelia: how else am I meant to deal with my emotions? in a healthy way? No Jac: I can't lecture you Jac: not now anyway, maybe later Amelia: you are though, a little bit Jac: if you reckon that then your parents really aren't strict enough Amelia: they're really not, miracle baby privileges are lifelong in this 🏠 Jac: you're gonna turn out so ill-adjusted Jac: good thing they won't care though Amelia: I probably already am Jac: probably Amelia: but at least I don't need stitches Jac: 🌤 Amelia: remember when I did Amelia: terrifying Jac: safe to say it dashed any dreams of wanting to be a surgeon Amelia: I thought the scar was going to be so ugly but you wouldn't let me get another fringe Jac: the only other person with a forehead scar is harry potter and it's a favourable comparison Jac: there's lots of bitches with fringes Amelia: my parents definitely don't love me enough if it's not a ⚡️ Jac: that sounds like they were practising ritual scarification Amelia: but you do, you said I could never be ugly Jac: because you couldn't Amelia: did I cry? I feel like I should be crying now Jac: a bit Jac: but I didn't tell and your mum just thought you were in loads of pain so you got ice cream Amelia: it bled more than it hurt Jac: headwounds do Jac: and you've got a massive head Amelia: tomorrow I will Amelia: it'll feel HUGE Jac: be thankful Is can only message you Jac: not talk you into another headache Amelia: she has been Jac: yeah? Amelia: I don't know what to say Jac: is she going into too much detail Amelia: always Jac: just tell her she's making you 🤮 Amelia: is this who I am now? Jac: a person with normal boundaries? Amelia: someone on the other fucking side Jac: of what Jac: what are you on about Amelia: everything Amelia: left out of it Jac: you don't want to be like Is Amelia: she's not 💔 Jac: that's just who she is Jac: she's not got anything in her life that makes her Amelia: neither have I Jac: you clearly do Jac: or a lack of something, either way Amelia: or I'm dramatic, like you said Jac: is that how it feels? Amelia: yeah Jac: okay, you're just dramatic then Jac: go get some sleep Amelia: or everyone's gaslighting me Jac: sounds a bit like a conspiracy theory Amelia: lack of trust is very scorpio-ish of me Jac: true Jac: you're just being true to type Amelia: I'm going slowly insane, true to my artistic type Jac: you can have your 💙 period Amelia: shame I didn't go blue outside Jac: or not Jac: I'm glad you're back Amelia: so you can go and get some sleep Jac: why do you want to make me out as so selfish Amelia: because that would make sense Amelia: and it wouldn't be my fault Jac: nothing is your fault Jac: regret is just a requirement of a hangover, with the shame Amelia: we can't go back because you want Savannah as a friend more than me Amelia: if that's not my fault or you being selfish and shallow I don't know how to make sense of it Jac: it isn't that simple Jac: but if you need it to be one of those two Jac: go with the latter Amelia: in 3rd class after Ms Brennan paired me with Georgia for the school trip and she got it into her head we were going to be best friends, you were upset and I told her to leave me alone Amelia: I didn't say to you that if you wanted to hang out with me then she was part of the deal Jac: Georgia was lame Amelia: and you think Savannah is the coolest, I know Jac: we aren't in third class Amelia: exactly, we've been friends longer than that now and you won't do that for me Jac: you can't expect me to do that Jac: we should have more friends Jac: go see if Georgia still wants to be your bestie Amelia: she won't if I message her now,  unless she was at the party too Amelia: maybe she'd still be up Jac: don't be stupid Jac: obviously wait 'til you're sober Jac: she'd think you were trying to booty call her Amelia: I've got loads of them Jac: Lucky you, right Amelia: not really Jac: Connell hasn't messaged me yet Amelia: he's probably waiting until he's sober Amelia: so you don't think he's stupid Jac: I doubt he's put that much thought into it Amelia: don't you care? Jac: should I? Amelia: you like him Amelia: being thought about is like the bare minimum Jac: he wants me, that's all I need Amelia: loads of people want you and you didn't need any of them Jac: we're older now Amelia: yeah Amelia: we are Jac: if I don't want a boyfriend, there's the alternative Amelia: okay Jac: like you said, they think you're weird Amelia: you care about all the wrong things Jac: says you Amelia: I also said I don't want to fight anymore Jac: There's nothing to fight about Jac: get some sleep Amelia: just everything to fight for Jac: Amelia Amelia: I'm going, I'm going Jac: that's not what I meant Amelia: do you want to say what you mean? Jac: don't be mad at me, okay Amelia: I can't be mad at you Jac: Sorry Amelia: you're sorrier than you've ever been and I'm drunker Amelia: we really are older now Jac: ain't it fun Amelia: you'll have fun again tomorrow Amelia: or the next day Jac: that's a promise or a threat Amelia: Savannah won't let you be sad or any longer than it takes her to apply a facial Amelia: for* Jac: don't I deserve to be happy Amelia: of course you do Jac: then what's the problem? Amelia: Sorry Jac: yeah Jac: I know Jac: forget it, let's just Jac: tomorrow's a new day Amelia: I don't think facials cure hangovers Jac: it's all about hydration actually Jac: so it wouldn't hurt Amelia: it would if she applied it Amelia: whispering is a foreign language Jac: 🙄 Amelia: 🥱 Jac: go then Amelia: if that's what you want Jac: you're tired, don't be annoying Amelia: I'm tired of you defending her constantly Jac: I can't help that there's nothing wrong with her Amelia: she's annoying, don't call me annoying Jac: don't act like I'm making you go to sleep, or that you can't if I don't say so Amelia: I swear to god, it's like we're in a parallel fucking universe and I'm the only one who realises Jac: I like Savannah Amelia: Why? She's the same person you used to not like Jac: No, we didn't know her then Amelia: you sound like her, acting like her boyfriend magically appeared last year when she thinks he got hot Jac: Do you reckon randoms like Georgia know you as well as I do? Amelia: it doesn't mean she can't have an opinion Jac: no, but it means it's not as informed Amelia: she'll change her mind once we're best friends Amelia: I haven't changed mine about Savannah Jac: well I have Amelia: why don't you trust me? Jac: It's not about trusting you Jac: I've got my opinion, you've got yours Amelia: 😕 Jac: it doesn't have to be Amelia: what do you want me to do, spend even MORE time with her? Jac: I don't need you to like her Amelia: what then? Jac: Accept that I do, that's it Amelia: just don't like her more than me Jac: we aren't little kids any more Jac: you'll always be my first best friend, nothing can change that Amelia: I wish we were Jac: I know Jac: we can't go back though Jac: no matter how hard we wish it Amelia: I'm not stupid, I know it wasn't perfect Amelia: but I can't keep feeling like this going forward Jac: no, you can't Jac: what are you going to do? Amelia: I don't know Jac: one for the morning Amelia: one for my mum Jac: probably Amelia: if she can't help me I'll fully lean into the insane artist thing Jac: you're going to be okay, Meels Jac: I know you will Amelia: please go back to being cynical or I'm going to cry Jac: I'll do my best Amelia: thanks Jac: just keep away from 💛 paint okay Amelia: if I use it all to paint my room I'll be safe Amelia: and obviously cheered up Jac: have you made that much of a mess Jac: 🤢 🤮 Amelia: RIP to this rug, the only thing in here my mum liked Jac: oh god Amelia: Savannah will love me for giving her the chance to go 🛍 Amelia: we can all go Jac: that's true Amelia: Is will probably have 🤮 too Amelia: maybe right now, she's gone very quiet Jac: I should probably message her Amelia: tomorrow, you're 😴 as far as she knows Jac: a good out Jac: she's fine, right Amelia: she's 😍🥰😘 Amelia: that's fine for her Jac: Does she like Savannah Amelia: you read how excited she was about matching manicures Jac: right Jac: she doesn't fake stuff Amelia: so she must like her Jac: I don't know why she likes me Amelia: Is likes anyone who doesn't take a boy from her Jac: Yeah Jac: it's hard to feel sorry for her Amelia: anyway, you're a really easy person to like Jac: we aren't good friends to her Amelia: she's not perfect herself Jac: she's just oblivious though Amelia: I'll do better by her Jac: I don't know if I will Amelia: why not? Jac: I don't think I can be bothered Amelia: 😂 Jac: 😏 Jac: it's not funny though, really Amelia: a little bit Jac: you think I'm a bad person? Amelia: no Jac: okay Amelia: if I have to accept that we're not kids and everything's different, she can too Jac: we'll all have to Amelia: she'll probably get a proper boyfriend like Savannah soon anyway Amelia: then it'll be her who can't be bothered with us Jac: you're right Jac: hope it's not Tom Jac: or Josh??? Amelia: she can have one of the many lads in my inbox Jac: how generous of you Amelia: no ulterior motives Jac: just to palm them off Amelia: she'll enjoy it Jac: too much Amelia: I'll listen to her talk about it over doing it Jac: mhmm Jac: I have to go now Amelia: oh Amelia: okay Jac: I've got so much homework to do tomorrow Jac: I need at least some sleep to not totally tank it Amelia: at least we could spend time together in detention Jac: That is NOT happening Amelia: I'm joking, go Jac: Night ❤ Amelia: yeah Jac: aren't you going to wish me sweet dreams? Amelia: you're too virgo Amelia: too much on your mind Jac: you could still wish for me Jac: even if it won't happen Amelia: I do Jac: Thanks Jac: can you dream when you're drunk? Amelia: I don't really dream a lot Amelia: maybe I only can when I'm drunk Amelia: what if Jac: that's a terrible excuse for alcoholism Jac: but tell me in the morning Amelia: you'll have to remind me Jac: deal Amelia: goodnight Jac: 👋💤 Amelia: ❤❤❤

[iamcinema]

IAC Reviews #19: Wishbone (2000)

Hey, is anyone still alive out there? I hope so.

Coming off of last year was a disaster, and well, we didn't enter 2021 on the highest of notes. I guess you could say I've been burned out and not having a ton of motivation to do a lot, even with how much I've been grinding on Letterboxd over the past few months. I think I'm ready to come back, and since there's a storm is brewing outside, let's make today a movie night...and boy, do I have a treat for you.

I think I've made it kind of apparent that I have a weakness for terrible, low-budget, trash fires. There's something oddly charming about them where they always find a way to lure me in, and given the scene on Letterboxd, there's a bunch of SOV masochists out there waiting to get their next fix. While digging around for material to cross off my lists on titles to find and add, I was reminded of a terrible, low-budget film that was shot in my hometown over 20 years ago. I'm full of fear for what's to come, and you should be too.

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Wishbone is a 2000 horror film directed by Timothy Gaer and co-created by Michael Fasciana, centering on a woman named Laurie who receives an unusual artifact from her eccentric aunt she acquired from a pawn dealer that causes those around her to disappear when they make wishes on it. Hmm, seems simple enough. Let's what we're in for, and I'm absolutely not ready because the IMDb page says this shit is over two hours long, despite a version on Youtube having it just a bit over 90 minutes. Let us pray.

Wishbone in One Gif:

This acting is might be the death of me, but I'm not sure what's going to be the catalyst that causes me to fall down the stairs and break my neck: the sound quality, the weird editing, or the music...oh, god what the fuck is the music doing? So much noise, noise noise!

Okay, so let's dig into this before I take too long of a break and I don't come back to this. I've already had to pause the movie a few times to catch my breath or just rewind and go back because there's a good amount that I keep missing because, apparently, the star of the film is the score and not Laurie. This is so, so slow. I've seen a lot of long horror movies, but at least with those, it feels like things are happening. Even Blood Lake had filler that did something to some degree, and with that, it was consistently bad. This movie doesn't even know what it wants to do. So, as a disclaimer, there's a good chance I'm probably missing some key details that I didn't hear because it seems that characterization isn't important if the music insists on talking over everyone.

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So, to date, this might be one of the worst horror movies (and movies in general) that I've ever seen and it might be one of the slowest things in the entire megaverse. This is over 90 minutes of, somehow, nothing and something happening simultaneously - if that makes any sense.

This takes its sweet ass time moving along and there's so little pay-off. The majority of the characters are either nameless or we aren't introduced to them in a way that matters enough for us to care about them. It's kind of like with Violent Shit and other low-budget slasher films where the majority of the characters serve no purpose but to be disposable. Next to the two main leads, Laurie and Joe, and maybe a few others, everyone is just forgettable and even then I couldn't honestly tell you anyone's name if it was explicitly brought up. IMDb isn't helpful either, and at this point it just makes me care even less. I'm not sure if my patience has been tested too much with this, but it's kind of sad that I'm more invested in seeing what the background characters are doing than Laurie and Joe - even though I can't really hear what the hell they're saying.

Yeah, I really can't move on without talking about the sound and the music. Why is it always the audio with these movies? This has an estimated budget of $100,000, or $154,779.43 today in August 2021. How do you have the ability to somehow not make this look like a potato for the most part, well for the day shots that is, but you don't have it in you to get a good mic and someone who knows how to mix and edit correctly? I would sort of understand if you spent the majority of the money on talent to cut corners, but this is just ridiculous. Did they use the cameras' built-in mics to catch the audio here?

I feel like I need to interrupt the movie constantly to tell them to speak up because if I turn up the volume, I'm just getting bombarded with this really weird soundtrack that doesn't fit. I shit you not, during one of the kill scenes, the music booming over it sounds like it was ripped from Kevin MacLeod's "lounge" library and then the reverse happens where ominous music is playing over a more touching scene - and that's not even a dig at Kevin as an artist. That's just how inappropriate and unfitting this editing is. The weird fucking thing about this specific kill scene is that it sounds like the audio is stacked, so there are two different instrumental tracks going on.

How do you fuck something as basic as tension up like that? The audio choices are so painfully inconsistent and it doesn't know what it wants to do. There are moments where you can hear the dialogue just fine, but then the music comes in out of nowhere to segway us into the next scene and it starts to muffle things out. If it isn't that, then the dialogue is just so soft that you'd think there was a pillow on the mic or we're hearing them from the opposite side of a sound-dampened room.

This is what I meant earlier when I said I apologize in advance if I miss anything crucial because I can't make out half of these conversations. So, I'm having to keep going back if I care enough or just having to pause and take breaks because there's only so much I can handle. This means that there's a good amount I'll blank on because I have to keep going back because I can't remember the majority of these no-named characters. Who the fuck are you people? Why am I supposed to care?

If I'm understanding the non-existent rules of the wishbone, you're connected to whoever dies in some way. So, why is any of this relevant to what's going on? If it's random, then it's another reason for me not to care just because some frat kids made a wish at some point. Again, who the hell are you and why am I supposed to lament over them? Why is there so much useless filler here? Did I mention that this is over 90 minutes long and there are *three* fucking party scenes? Party scenes are to Wishbone as ten-minute-long jetskiing and beer game scenes are to Blood Lake.

Oh, speaking of other shit that's annoying. Let's talk about general editing because the sound isn't the only thing that's a mess here.

I swear that almost every single scene in this ends with a fade-out/fade-in shot. Only one or two scenes come to mind where this doesn't happen, and the first time it did I thought my browser was freezing because it abruptly cut to black and then smash cuts to a party scene. I've never, ever seen a movie that abused this that much before and it's on par with something I would have seen made by a bunch of high school kids. So, when we have a moment where this doesn't happen and it plays out normally, it feels like a breath of fresh air. I'm sure this movie's run time could have been shaved down by at least a minute or two if this wasn't a problem, along with all the useless close-up shots that serve nothing to the plot.

It's such a waste of time. I'm so fucking tired. How was this movie's budget $100k? Did they spend most of it on renting the Scranton Police Department for a few shots or did it go towards their impromptu trip to Party City? I'm so tired and I don't care anymore.

Do you want to know what the real kicker is? With just barely twenty minutes left, the whole lore about the monkey's wishbone paw comes back and that's when Laurie and her friend Karen think something is weird. Isn't this whole realization trope that happens within the first or second act, not now with your Great Value brand version of the Dream Warriors?

Also, it's not specified how much time has gone by since the start, but it has to have been at least a week or two. It's incredibly weird how they paint the main characters and the unnamed background ones as such good friends that they don't think it's weird how almost all of them have disappeared - especially one girl who doesn't seem off-put that her boyfriend (or ex) disappeared after getting into an argument at one of the parties and none of his friends could reach him either at his own house.

The final showdown is an utter pain in the ass to get through because the conflict ends as abruptly as it starts and it's so unsatisfying. We get to see the face of our villain, I guess, and then more or less cut to our leads holding hands down the street set to the same looping lounge music we've been dealing with for over 90 damn minutes. Is everyone else who went with them dead? Did they live? Who cares! That's one thing the movie and I can agree on since we never see them again. We end on a shitty cliffhanger that's supposed to prepare us for a sequel, which thankfully never happened.

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And that was Wishbone. Holy fucking shit, I've never been so thankful for a movie to be over in my life. It's 11:07 PM as of tinkering with some minor revisions and I've been in purgatory with this for over five hours, and yet, it feels like an entire lifetime has gone by.

I've raved about how bad Blood Lake was with its incredibly bad pacing, but this is next level awful and a testament to bad filmmaking if I've ever seen it. I expect a lot of the things I complained about from super amateur filmmakers who are shooting on an actual shoestring budget, not people who had that much money to fuck around with. How did they have that kind of a budget, and the most they can give us is bad audio, Windows Movie Maker levels of basic editing, three wrap parties, and a few crumbs of gore that we could see?

This was physically painful to see and I'm in much worse shape having endured it than I would have been if I sat through something liked Boardinghouse, and that has a two-and-a-half-hour-long version tied to it. This is just a marvel and I mean that in a so-bad-it's-bad way, not like how SOV enthusiasts who love this stuff pine over. If I had to give one thing going for it, one single granule of gold that I enjoyed from this, it's the limited shots we get of the area so I could make a game out of seeing what local spots I recognized. If playing I Spy is the only way for someone to endure your movie, then I don't know what else to say.

Wishbone is a hot mess where shit's happening, but also nothing is happening at the same time. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. In fact, I wish this movie never existed or would die in the ether and never return to our mortal realm ever again. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go have a smoke and hope I don't get run over by a hearse tomorrow.

RATING: 0.5/10