#yo tengo REGRET

[mixed-up-metaphors]

liberation rites in pyre be like

[tiger-willow]

Farewell QSMP o7

(I’m not really good with words so I typed this out before the event just copy and paste)

[Translations will be available]

Hello qsmpblr I hope you are well. I only have one thing to say and that is:

Thank you so much Qsmp, the creators, the admins & ex-admins/other people who helped work on it and many, and also thank you yo the wonderful community!

I’ve been watching qsmp since the very first day and joined Tumblr/qsmpblr in July! It is something that I definitely do not regret at all! It’s changed my life, made me laugh, cry and find comfort during my sad times.

I learned about and started watching so many amazing creators from different languages because of qsmp! Not to mention I met so many amazing people here on Tumblr that I never would have met because of this server! This server made me want to learn Spanish, re-learned French and learn more and celebrate different cultures.

I’m very sad that it’s ending it especially ending so soon… but I’m glad theses creators are playing games with each other and talking to each other outside of the server. AND the fact that theses creators would have never even met because of qsmp is FUCKING CRAZY!

Again I’m going to miss the server so much but I will never forgot the memories we made. We’ve had good and bad moments in the community but we sure pushed through it! (Which is another reason I’m glad I joined Tumblr and not Twitter lmao)

To the admins if you’re reading this:

Thank you so much again to the amazing admins who helped the server and helped make this server something truly wonderful! You deserve most if not all the credit for your work on this project! You all deserve a long rest after all the great work you’ve done! :)

(Plus I’m making fanart for u)

And an extra special big thank you so much to Quackity! He’s the reason this server exists! He’s the reason for theses people being here! He’s the reason we become closer! I know and understand Quackity has messed up but the fact he was so passionate about this server and cared about the team and I’m forever grateful for that!

Thank you so much Qsmp and everyone who played their part in the server or community. I will never forget this server and it’s memories! I’ll be heading off now.

Goodbye/Goodnight everyone and I love you all ❤️🫂 :) -Tiger

Adiós QSMP o7/Despedida QSMP o7/Adieu QSMP o7/안녕 QSMP o7/Auf Wiedersehen QSMP o7

ES: Hola qsmpblr espero que estés bien. Sólo tengo una cosa que decir y es:

¡Muchas gracias Qsmp, los creadores, los administradores y ex administradores/otras personas que ayudaron a trabajar en ello y muchos más, y también gracias a la maravillosa comunidad!

¡He estado viendo qsmp desde el primer día y me uní a Tumblr/qsmpblr en julio! ¡Es algo de lo que definitivamente no me arrepiento en absoluto! Cambió mi vida, me hizo reír, llorar y encontrar consuelo en mis momentos tristes.

¡Aprendí y comencé a ver a tantos creadores increíbles de diferentes idiomas gracias a qsmp! ¡Sin mencionar que conocí a tanta gente increíble aquí en Tumblr que nunca habría conocido gracias a este servidor! Este servidor me hizo querer aprender español, volver a aprender francés y aprender más y celebrar diferentes culturas.

Me entristece mucho que esto termine, especialmente, que termine tan pronto... pero me alegra que estos creadores estén jugando entre ellos y hablando entre ellos fuera del servidor. ¡Y el hecho de que estos creadores nunca se hubieran conocido debido a qsmp es PINCHE LOCO!

Nuevamente voy a extrañar mucho el servidor, pero nunca olvidaré los recuerdos que creamos. Hemos tenido buenos y malos momentos en la comunidad, ¡pero seguro que lo superamos! (Que es otra razón por la que me alegro de haberme unido a Tumblr y no a Twitter lmao)

A los administradores si están leyendo esto:

¡Muchas gracias nuevamente a los increíbles administradores que ayudaron al servidor y ayudaron a hacer de este servidor algo realmente maravilloso! ¡Te mereces la mayor parte, si no todo, el crédito por tu trabajo en este proyecto! ¡Todos os merecéis un largo descanso después del gran trabajo que habéis realizado! :)

(Además, estoy haciendo fanart para ti)

¡Y muchas gracias muy especiales a Quackity! ¡Él es la razón por la que existe este servidor! ¡Él es la razón por la que estas personas están aquí! ¡Él es la razón por la que nos volvemos más cercanos! Sé y entiendo que Quackity se ha equivocado, pero el hecho de que le apasionara tanto este servidor y se preocupara por el equipo, ¡siempre estaré agradecido por eso!

Muchas gracias Qsmp y a todos los que desempeñaron su papel en el servidor o la comunidad. ¡Nunca olvidaré este servidor y sus recuerdos! Me iré ahora.

Adiós/Buenas noches a todos y los amo a todos ❤️ 🫂 :) -Tiger

PR: Olá qsmpblr espero que você esteja bem. Só tenho uma coisa a dizer e é:

Muito obrigado Qsmp, os criadores, os administradores e ex-administradores/outras pessoas que ajudaram a trabalhar nele e muitos, e também obrigado à comunidade maravilhosa!

Tenho assistido o qsmp desde o primeiro dia e entrei no Tumblr/qsmpblr em julho! É algo que definitivamente não me arrependo! Mudou minha vida, me fez rir, chorar e encontrar conforto nos momentos tristes.

Aprendi e comecei a assistir tantos criadores incríveis de diferentes idiomas por causa do qsmp! Sem falar que conheci tantas pessoas incríveis aqui no Tumblr que nunca teria conhecido por causa desse servidor! Este servidor me fez querer aprender espanhol, reaprender francês e aprender mais e celebrar diferentes culturas.

Estou muito triste que esteja terminando, especialmente tão cedo… mas estou feliz que esses criadores estejam jogando uns com os outros e conversando fora do servidor. E o fato de que esses criadores nunca teriam se conhecido por causa do qsmp é MUITO LOUCO!

Mais uma vez vou sentir muita falta do servidor, mas nunca esquecerei as lembranças que fizemos. Tivemos momentos bons e ruins na comunidade, mas com certeza superamos isso! (Qual é outra razão pela qual estou feliz por ter entrado no Tumblr e não no Twitter, lmao) Para os administradores, se você estiver lendo isto:

Muito obrigado novamente aos incríveis administradores que ajudaram o servidor e ajudaram a tornar este servidor algo verdadeiramente maravilhoso! Você merece a maior parte, senão todo o crédito pelo seu trabalho neste projeto! Todos vocês merecem um longo descanso depois de todo o excelente trabalho que realizaram! :))

(Além disso, estou fazendo fanart para você)

E um grande obrigado extra especial ao Quackity! Ele é a razão pela qual este servidor existe! Ele é a razão dessas pessoas estarem aqui! Ele é a razão pela qual nos tornamos mais próximos! Eu sei e entendo que Quackity estragou tudo, mas o fato de ele ser tão apaixonado por este servidor e se preocupar com a equipe e serei eternamente grato por isso!

Muito obrigado Qsmp e todos que fizeram sua parte no servidor ou na comunidade. Nunca esquecerei este servidor e suas memórias! Eu vou partir agora.

Adeus/Boa noite a todos e eu amo todos vocês ❤️ 🫂 :)) -Tiger

FR: Bonjour qsmpblr j'espère que vous allez bien. Je n'ai qu'une chose à dire et c'est :

Merci beaucoup Qsmp, les créateurs, les administrateurs & ex-administrateurs/autres personnes qui ont aidé à travailler dessus et bien d'autres, et merci également à la merveilleuse communauté !

Je regarde qsmp depuis le tout premier jour et j'ai rejoint Tumblr/qsmpblr en juillet ! C’est quelque chose que je ne regrette absolument pas du tout ! Cela a changé ma vie, m’a fait rire, pleurer et trouver du réconfort dans mes moments tristes.

J'ai découvert et commencé à regarder tant de créateurs incroyables de différentes langues grâce à qsmp ! Sans oublier que j'ai rencontré tellement de gens extraordinaires ici sur Tumblr que je n'aurais jamais rencontré à cause de ce serveur ! Ce serveur m'a donné envie d'apprendre l'espagnol, de réapprendre le français et d'en apprendre davantage et de célébrer différentes cultures.

Je suis très triste que cela se termine, surtout si tôt… mais je suis heureux que ces créateurs jouent à des jeux entre eux et se parlent en dehors du serveur. ET le fait que ces créateurs ne se seraient jamais rencontrés à cause de qsmp est FUCKING FOLLE !

Encore une fois, le serveur va beaucoup me manquer mais je n'oublierai jamais les souvenirs que nous avons créés. Nous avons vécu de bons et de mauvais moments dans la communauté, mais nous avons réussi à nous en sortir ! (C'est une autre raison pour laquelle je suis content d'avoir rejoint Tumblr et non Twitter lmao)

Aux administrateurs si vous lisez ceci :

Merci encore beaucoup aux incroyables administrateurs qui ont aidé le serveur et contribué à faire de ce serveur quelque chose de vraiment merveilleux ! Vous méritez la plupart, sinon la totalité, du mérite pour votre travail sur ce projet ! Vous méritez tous un long repos après tout l’excellent travail que vous avez accompli ! :))

(En plus, je fais des fanarts pour toi)

Et un grand merci tout spécial à Quackity ! C'est la raison pour laquelle ce serveur existe ! C’est la raison pour laquelle ces gens sont ici ! C’est la raison pour laquelle nous nous rapprochons ! Je sais et je comprends que Quackity a tout gâché, mais le fait qu'il soit si passionné par ce serveur et se soucie de l'équipe et je lui en serai éternellement reconnaissant !

Merci beaucoup Qsmp et à tous ceux qui ont joué leur rôle dans le serveur ou la communauté. Je n’oublierai jamais ce serveur et ses souvenirs ! Je vais partir maintenant.

Au revoir/bonne nuit à tous et je vous aime tous ❤️ 🫂 :)) -Tiger

KR: 안녕하세요 qsmpblr 잘 지내시길 바랍니다. 제가 드릴 말씀은 딱 하나뿐입니다.

Qsmp, 창작자, 관리자, 전 관리자/작업에 도움을 주신 많은 분들께 감사드립니다. 그리고 멋진 커뮤니티에도 감사드립니다!

저는 첫날부터 qsmp를 시청해왔고 7월에 Tumblr/qsmpblr에 가입했습니다! 전혀 후회하지 않는 일���에요! 그것은 내 인생을 변화시켰고, 슬픈 시간 동안 나를 웃고 울게 만들고 위로를 찾게 만들었습니다.

저는 qsmp 덕분에 다양한 언어를 사용하는 수많은 놀라운 크리에이터에 대해 배우고 시청하기 시작했습니다! 말할 것도 없이, 이 서버 때문에 결코 만나지 못했을 멋진 사람들을 여기 Tumblr에서 너무 많이 만났습니다! 이 서버 덕분에 저는 스페인어를 배우고, 프랑스어를 다시 배우고, 더 많은 것을 배우고 다양한 문화를 기념하고 싶었습니다.

특히나 너무 빨리 끝나서 너무 아쉽지만... 이 창작자들이 서버 밖에서도 서로 게임도 하고 대화도 나누는 게 기쁘네요. 그리고 이 제작자들이 qsmp 때문에 한 번도 만난 적이 없다는 사실은 정말 미친 짓입니다!

또 서버가 너무 그리워지겠지만 우리가 만든 추억은 절대 잊지 못할 것 같아요. 우리는 커뮤니티에서 좋은 순간과 나쁜 순간을 겪었지만 확실히 이겨냈습니다! (트위터가 아니라 Tumblr에 가입한 것이 다행인 또 다른 이유입니다 lmao)

이 글을 읽고 계시다면 관리자에게:

서버를 돕고 이 서버를 정말 멋진 서버로 만드는 데 도움을 준 놀라운 관리자에게 다시 한 번 감사드립니다! 당신은 이 프로젝트에 대한 당신의 노력에 대한 모든 공로를 인정받을 자격이 있습니다! 여러분 모두는 여러분이 이룩한 모든 위대한 일을 마치고 긴 휴식을 취할 자격이 있습니다! :))

(그리고 나는 당신을 위해 팬아트를 만들고 있습니다)

그리고 특별히 Quackity에게 정말 감사드립니다! 이 서버가 존재하는 이유입니다! 이 사람들이 여기 있는 이유가 바로 그 사람이에요! 우리가 더 가까워지는 이유죠! 나는 Quackity가 엉망이 된 것을 알고 이해하지만 그가 이 서버에 대해 너무나 열정적이고 팀에 관심을 갖고 있다는 사실에 대해 영원히 감사드립니다!

Qsmp와 서버나 커뮤니티에서 자신의 역할을 해주신 모든 분들께 진심으로 감사드립니다. 나는 이 서버를 결코 잊지 않을 것이며 그것은 추억입니다! 이제 출발하겠습니다.

모두 안녕/잘자요 그리고 모두 사랑해요 ❤️ 🫂 :)) -Tiger

DE: Hallo qsmpblr, ich hoffe, es geht dir gut. Ich kann nur eines sagen und das ist:

Vielen Dank an Qsmp, die Ersteller, die Administratoren und ehemaligen Administratoren/anderen Leute, die bei der Arbeit daran mitgeholfen haben, und vielen Dank auch an die wunderbare Community!

Ich schaue qsmp seit dem ersten Tag und bin im Juli Tumblr/qsmpblr beigetreten! Das ist etwas, was ich auf keinen Fall bereue! Es hat mein Leben verändert, mich zum Lachen und Weinen gebracht und mir in meinen traurigen Zeiten Trost gegeben.

Dank qsmp habe ich so viele tolle YouTuber aus verschiedenen Sprachen kennengelernt und angefangen, sie anzuschauen! Ganz zu schweigen davon, dass ich hier auf Tumblr so viele tolle Leute kennengelernt habe, die ich aufgrund dieses Servers nie getroffen hätte! Dieser Server hat in mir den Wunsch geweckt, Spanisch zu lernen, Französisch neu zu lernen und mehr zu lernen und verschiedene Kulturen zu feiern.

Ich bin sehr traurig, dass es zu Ende geht, vor allem, dass es so bald endet … aber ich bin froh, dass diese Schöpfer miteinander spielen und außerhalb des Servers miteinander reden. UND die Tatsache, dass sich diese Schöpfer dank qsmp nie kennengelernt hätten, ist VERDAMMT VERRÜCKT!

Auch hier werde ich den Server so sehr vermissen, aber ich werde die Erinnerungen, die wir gemacht haben, nie vergessen. Wir hatten gute und schlechte Momente in der Community, aber wir haben es auf jeden Fall geschafft! (Das ist ein weiterer Grund, warum ich froh bin, dass ich Tumblr beigetreten bin und nicht Twitter lmao)

An die Administratoren, wenn Sie dies lesen:

Nochmals vielen Dank an die großartigen Administratoren, die dem Server geholfen und dabei geholfen haben, diesen Server zu etwas wirklich Wunderbarem zu machen! Ihnen gebührt die meiste, wenn nicht sogar die ganze Anerkennung für Ihre Arbeit an diesem Projekt! Sie alle haben nach all der großartigen Arbeit, die Sie geleistet haben, eine lange Pause verdient! :))

(Außerdem mache ich Fanart für dich)

Und ein ganz besonderes großes Dankeschön an Quackity! Er ist der Grund, warum dieser Server existiert! Er ist der Grund dafür, dass diese Leute hier sind! Er ist der Grund, warum wir uns näher kommen! Ich weiß und verstehe, dass Quackity es vermasselt hat, aber die Tatsache, dass er so leidenschaftlich für diesen Server war und sich um das Team kümmerte, und dafür bin ich auf ewig dankbar!

Vielen Dank Qsmp und allen, die ihren Teil zum Server oder zur Community beigetragen haben. Ich werde diesen Server und seine Erinnerungen nie vergessen! Ich mache mich jetzt auf den Weg.

Auf Wiedersehen/Gute Nacht allerseits und ich liebe euch alle ❤️ 🫂 :)) -Tiger

[esuemmanuel]

Mi cabeza, el enemigo.

"No te mientas por convivir ni intentes aparentar que te importa. Sé tú, con toda tu tristeza, tu malestar, tu asco… ¡Y que el puto mundo siga girando en su mierda!"

Amanecí con agua en los ojos y un profundo vacío en mi interior. Me dicen por todas partes que no tengo nada porqué entristecer, porque todo lo tengo, porque nada me falta. Pero, nadie entiende la causa de mi tristeza… de este dolor que me castra… que me enoja… que me enajena. Yo sólo tengo una cosa buena, y eso es poder escribir. Si no escribo… siento que desfallezco. Pero, no sólo se trata de escribir, mi dolor va más allá… y siempre me he sentido así… desde que recuerdo…

¿Por qué veo al mundo tan denso… tan yerto… tan lejos de mí? ¿Por qué me siento tan ajeno… tan desconocido… tan irrelevante e invisible?

Toda mi vida me he sentido así… y no se va… no se va este pesar. A pesar de todo lo que hago y tengo, sigo sintiéndome ajeno… triste… y muerto. No me interesa ver el mundo de colores… no quiero sonreír, sólo quiero me dejen vivir mi amargura, mi acidez, mi renuncia, mi silencio y mi soledad. Yo también he sido una farsa. Creí que había aprendido a sonreír… a ver la vida de colores… a sentir la luz y esbozarla en las hojas… a ser consciente…. bueno… y noble. La realidad es que siempre me he odiado… y he odiado al mundo.

No me hallo… no me encuentro.

Un grupo de gente vino a desenmascararme, y me alegro por eso. Ya no más farsa… ¡Pura rebeldía y revolución! ¡Anarquía!

Siempre he tenido a mi peor enemigo, no cerca, dentro de mí… en mi cabeza. Saber que lo tengo dentro y que poco puedo hacer para callarlo, me abruma. No se cansa de hacerme ver lo que no quiero ver. Me orilla a ver la realidad… la falsedad detrás de las palabras… de la gente… del mundo.

La humanidad se lo ha creído todo y no hace nada para cambiar.

Miente. Roba. Mata. Sin piedad.

Y los pocos que se salvan quedan dañados por tanta mentira, robo, heridas e injusticia.

¡Esto es el mundo!

Es cansado intentar taparle los ojos a mi enemigo, porque tapárselos no inhibe al mundo de seguir siendo una porquería.

Photo by Adrian Swancar on Unsplash

My head, the enemy.

"Don't lie to yourself for living together or try to pretend to care. Just be you, with all your sadness, your discomfort, your disgust…. And let the fucking world keep spinning in its shit!"

I woke up with water in my eyes and a deep emptiness inside me. They tell me everywhere that I have nothing to be sad about, because I have everything, because I lack nothing. But, nobody understands the cause of my sadness… of this pain that emasculates me… that makes me angry… that alienates me. I have only one good thing, and that is to be able to write. If I don't write… I feel I faint. But it's not just about writing, my pain goes beyond that… and I've always felt that way… ever since I can remember…

Why do I see the world so dense… so barren… so far away from me? Why do I feel so alien… so unknown… so irrelevant and invisible? All my life I've felt this way… and it won't go away… this regret won't go away. In spite of all I do and have, I still feel alien… sad… and dead. I'm not interested in seeing the world in colors… I don't want to smile, I just want to be left to live my bitterness, my acidity, my resignation, my silence and my solitude. I too have been a farce. I thought I had learned to smile… to see life in colors… to feel the light and sketch it on the leaves… to be conscious…. good… and noble. The reality is that I have always hated myself… and I have hated the world.

I can't find myself… I can't find myself.

A group of people came to unmask me, and I'm glad for that. No more farce… Pure rebellion and revolution! Anarchy!

I've always had my worst enemy, not near me, inside me… in my head. Knowing that I have him inside me and that there is little I can do to shut him up, overwhelms me. It never tires of making me see what I don't want to see. It forces me to see the reality… the falsehood behind the words… of the people… of the world.

Humanity has believed it all and does nothing to change.

It lies. Steal. It kills. Without mercy.

And the few who are saved are left damaged by so much lying, stealing, hurting and injustice.

This is the world!

It is tiring to try to cover my enemy's eyes, because covering them does not inhibit the world from continuing to be a mess.

[bandcampsnoop]

5/11/24.

I know we've all made concert mistakes we regret. I'll give you two. First, I was record shopping so long I missed over half of Eleventh Dream Day's set when opening for The Chills at the I-Beam in San Francisco. Second, I didn't see The Aislers Set EITHER night I saw Yo La Tengo and The Clean split the bill at The Fillmore (also in San Francisco).

The Aislers Set are just a fantastic band and Precious Recordings has released their John Peel session from 2001 on 10". Remember, buying this on Bandcamp doesn't incur high shipping rates because of a shipping arrangement with Jigsaw Records.

The recent post of Mighty Clouds (and by extension Saturday Looks Good To Me) sits nicely next to The Aislers Set. If you want some of The Aislers Set released work check Slumberland Records who reissued their catalogue on vinyl some years back.

[roamingbadger]

I was lucky enough to be tagged by @saecookie to name 10 songs with 10 names in the titles that I like, and then tag 10 other people to do the same. Feast your ears:

Dorian by Agnes Obel - currently obsessed

Natalie by Bell X1 - History is written by the winners / and I want my say

Francesca by Hozier - I was going to quote my favorite line but it's honestly just the whole chorus, it makes me ASCEND

La Valse d'Amélie - Version piano by Yann Tiersen - Honestly this whole soundtrack is a dreamlike wonder but at about 1:20 this song makes me want to cry at the beautiful sadness of life

Eve Is the Apple of My Eye by Bell X1 - Can't you see the grass is greener where it rains?

Lazy Line Painter Jane by Belle & Sebastian - Absolute underrated banger

Tom Courtenay - Acoustic Version by Yo La Tengo - Soft and gentle but painful like a needle prick

My Brother Tom, The Green Beret by Frightened Rabbit - Had to include FR on this list. If you see Tom on here twice no you don't actually

For Emily, Whenever I May Find Her by Simon & Garfunkel - I mean this song is like falling in love on foggy Victorian streets, it MUST be on here

Wandering Aengus by Johnny Flynn - A jaunty beaut.

I thought this would be incredibly difficult, but it was actually easy and I probably left out my favorite song ever. I sense imminent regret. BUT I had fun, and the resulting playlist is a great summary of my "vibe" I think. I tag @jesusbuchananbarnes @hemnalini @tigerofsummer @oneiro-nautical @maidenvault @sheet-metal-memories @captain-fflewddurfflam @dandelionpie @randomblabdom @ravenpuffheadcanons and as always, if you think these are unfun, please skip; if you think these are FUN, please JOIN. :D

[martymcflown]

A song for every letter of my URL (I am really regretting not changing my URL in however many years I’ve been here ;__;) Thanks @turtles-on-turts  “Flamboyant” - Dorian Electra

“I’ll Be Your Mirror” - The Velvet Underground

“Everybody’s Lonely” - Jukebox the Ghost

“Rhinestone Eyes” - Gorillaz

“cellophane” - FKA Twigs

“Empire” - Jukebox the Ghost

“Everyday” - Buddy Holly, The Crickets

“Your Woman” - White Town

“Everything Stays” - Olivia Olson, Adventure Time

“Body & Blood” - clipping.

“religion (u can lay your hands on me)” - Shura

“One of These Things First” - Nick Drake

“Wicked Little Town (Hedwig Version)” - Hedwig and the Angry Inch

“Growing/Dying” - The Backseat Lovers

“Autumn Sweater” - Yo La Tengo

“Might Tell You Tonight” - Scissor Sisters

“Easy” - Son Lux

Tagging based on vibes alone (sorry if you’ve been tagged already): @sinningsalsachip-blog @flightoftheconnie @scarlettblack24 @lindir-in-space

[junkshop-disco]

13 for the fanfic asks please! And if you don't listen to music when you're writing, I would still love to know who you've been listening to lately :D

Thank you and HNY! <3

Happy new year!!

13. Do you listen to music while you write?  If yes, what have you been listening to recently?

Sometimes. If I'm alone and it's quiet, I prefer silence, but if there's other people's noise to block out, always music. I make fic specific playlists which help me establish a vibe or have lyrics that go with the overall theme of the fic or I listen to huge soundscape-type stuff that doesn't have much in the way of lyrics, like Mogwai, or lyrics I can't understand like Sigur Ros. My fave Mogwai tracks for writing to are Friend of the Night and Take Me Somewhere Nice. I find them particularly good for writing sex scenes to, for some reason. This is my favourite Sigur Ros album to write to, it has a real elegiac quality to it, which I adore, and I also listen to quite a lot of classical music when I write, stuff that's sad but hopeful and quite delicate, Gorecki's Third Symphony is my go to or Arvo Part.

Current faves generally:

I am OBSESSED with this Billy Nomates track Spite. Her album came out yesterday so I've not had much time to absorb it yet but I've a strong feeling it'll end up being one of my faves of the year.

Also really into Lost Tapes by the Sugababes, my fave new track is probably No Regrets (or Back to Life or Love Me Hard) but also so much love for Flatline which is, for my money, one of the finest pop songs of the last decade and should've been a monster hit. The blend on their vocals is just so good, it kills me.

Very excited by new Everything But The Girl. Tracey Thorn is one of my all time favourite vocalists and writers and this is everything I hoped it would be. I'm also never not in the mood for Yo La Tengo and I can't wait for the rest of their album.

January also makes me want music that feels like being held very gently and this year I'm digging a sort of understated grandeur 60s vibe. I got a bunch of Scott Walker, Nancy Sinatra and Lee Hazelwood vinyl on eBay and it's doing the business of easing me into the year and softening the dark days.

Boy that's a lot of links but you know what I'm like lol. Let me know if there's anything you like 💛

[veronicaphoenix]

Yo en realidad nací en Jaén, no en la capital pero originalmente soy jiennense. You should visit Granada when you can! You won't regret it for sure 🤭

I'm going to see the opposite of Bad Omens haha, I'm going to the Jonas Brothers concert 😳 On February 6th I was in Paris watching Bad Omens and three months later I'm going to see exactly the opposite type of group haha but I'm really excited!

PD.: Estás al tanto del resurrection fest? 😏

¡Tengo pendiente volver a Andalucía! Y espero poder hacerlo pronto. No voy por allí desde hace una década, así que si planeo un viaje definitivamente apunto Granada en la ruta ;)

Oh my god I hope you enjoy the Jonas concert! I saw Bad Omens playing with BMTH in London last month and it was so goooood! Yes, I was keeping an eye on the updates for Resurrection Fest, hoping that we would get BMTH and Bad Omens on the same day, and was also hoping to see a couple of other bands we like. We already booked a hotel, but when I saw the line up by days I had to rethink the whole trip be because it’s so much money >.< We’ll see! Do you plan on going?!

[not-so-specialk]

Life update: hoy reflexione mucho, me di cuenta que la regué… MUCHO. Dude me estoy muriendo por llamarte y contarte y que me digas que si la regué pero que al final de cuentas es lo mejor…

So I’m re reading conversation and I’m just as bad as him… Cold.

Looking back at our kiss, I stopped him a few times and hid my face bc I’m a loser who doesn’t know how to kiss, and after it finished, I said “I’m sad” he asked why and I said “melancholy” … just right after our first kiss.

I was sad bc era algo que comenzaba y acababa ahí mismo y que yo quería aferrarme pero era como intentar abrazar al viento. Me daba melancolía saber que dentro de unos días yo estaría de regreso en mi casa y todo lo vivido sería un recuerdo. Pero no dije nada de eso y tal vez escuchar esas palabras justo después de lo qué pasó no fue muy grato

When I first saw him he told me he was sad cause he wanted to hug me tight but I only sidehugged him bc there were a lot of ppl. The following 3 days I did the same thing.

He was disappointed, I do know that much. He said he wanted to get closer and try to spot me but I never let him do it (unconsciously). Al día siguiente le enseñe algo en mi mano y mas tarde el me dijo que he was hoping I’d had hold his hand a bit longer or played with it, but I barely touched him.

Yo también quería abrazarlo fuerte pero el miedo al que dirán no me dejaba, quería platicar con el pero no podía parar de buscar con los ojos quién nos miraba. El me dijo que tenía ganas de ver a la persona con la que se mensajeaba, por que a la que veía no era a ella, y estaba en lo correcto.

After we spent time alone he sent me a few messages, and idk if it was bc I was too out of it but I wasn’t too.. chatty, I think I was a bit cold. He told me he was trying to be respectful and that if he could he would have spent the whole day with me but we couldn’t do that… solo le dije que lo entendía. El me dijo que fue un momento bonito, y creo que lo más bonito que conteste en esa conversación fue “tengo acelerado el corazón”

I regretted the fact that I was still holding back a lottttt that day even when it was just the two of us, and I thought I would “repay” him next time I saw him… but I didn’t got the chance cause it’s when it all started to crumble.

And by holding back and repay I don’t mean like doing things I shouldn’t… me refiero a que había muchas cosas que quería decirle y hacer, cosas bonitas y que el estaba intentado decir pero mi personalidad no me dejó decirle, tenía miedo y pena y eso era nuevo.

Sé que el resultado es el que tenía que ser, pero pensar en todo eso me hace darme cuenta que yo tengo más culpa de lo que pensé, y que si no quiero lastimar a nadie en el futuro debo de cambiar. Pobrecito el próximo hombre (jw exclusivamente) que se tope conmigo, literalmente no se como tratar a alguien y no se como dejar que me traten bien.

Si me ofrecen ayuda los quito, si me pagan algo les regreso el dinero, si me abren la puerta los mando por delante, no se… soy un fracaso.

Anyways… Ya te extraño, espero que me stalkees seguido.

[wavehq]

enjoy limitless possibilities here in celestire islands, spike ( buffy the vampire slayer ), rory gilmore ( gilmore girls ), and maggie greene ( the walking dead ), where you can start the new life you've always longed for. make sure you read the checklist, as we'll be sending the discord link through ims! enjoy your new dream, marissa!

( gilmore girls. tsai jui-hsuej, cis woman, she/her. ) ——- hey, is that ( rory gilmore ) hanging around ( rose library )? i wonder what life is like for them, balancing working as a ( twenty - five ) year old ( journalist) and ( reading three books at once )? they’re notorious for being ( intelligent) yet ( self centered ), and i always seem to hear ( my little corner of the world ) by ( yo la tengo ) playing whenever they walk past. they’re known around the islands for ( being class valedictorian), and they’re associated with ( pony tails, the smell of fresh books, and coffee). last we spoke, they were telling me about a vision they had… something about their biggest regret being ( dropping out of yale and not talking to her mother for months ), but it must have just been a bad dream. // — [ marissa, 34, est, she/her ]

( buffy the vampire slayer. charles michael davis, cis man, he/him. ) ——- hey, is that ( spike ) hanging around ( enchanted brews )? i wonder what life is like for them, balancing working as a ( one hundred twenty six (looks about 30) ) year old ( bartender) and ( runner)? they’re notorious for being ( honest ) yet ( hot headed), and i always seem to hear ( devil ) by ( shinedown ) playing whenever they walk past. they’re known around the islands for ( getting into fights), and they’re associated with ( leather jackets, darkness, and cigarettes ). last we spoke, they were telling me about a vision they had… something about their biggest regret being ( never being good enough for buffy ), but it must have just been a bad dream. // — [ marissa, 34, est, she/her ]

( the walking dead. lauren cohen, cis woman, she/her. ) ——- hey, is that ( maggie greene ) hanging around ( show time theater )? i wonder what life is like for them, balancing working as a ( thirty - two) year old ( veterinarian ) and ( actor )? they’re notorious for being ( loyal ) yet ( impulsive ), and i always seem to hear ( let it happen ) by ( jimmy eat world ) playing. whenever they walk past. they’re known around the islands for ( setting lose a bunch of animals from the zoo their senior year ), and they’re associated with ( combat boots, crisp fall mornings, warm cozy blankets). last we spoke, they were telling me about a vision they had… something about their biggest regret being ( not being able to save glenn ), but it must have just been a bad dream. // — [ marissa, 34, est, she/her ]

[thecolorsofpain]

I always dream of you in a distant way. There´s so much left unsaid. I never knew how to say goodbye other than crying. Writing has always been a source of expression for you so writting a long, difficult letter was easy for you. It´s always hard to read it. It never fails to make me feel like that horrid time in our lives where time stopped and blurred the content. It is the reason why I have nightmares every now and then. Memories come in the presence of dreams and made up scenarios that mimic the feelings from the real-life event. It´s always us in the middle of the crowd, holding my hand, a tight grip, and i´m always uncertain, uneasy because I don´t know if we´re still together or not, I´m never sure if i´m awake and doubting us. In the end I realize im dreaming and that we are, indeed, not together anymore. It leaves me with a profound sensation of worry, I know somehow there is someone else, a man, a partner and it´s not you and it feels like i am failing at being wholeheartedly loyal to him. So I always try hiding our hands in the crowd, lowering my gaze, avoiding eye contact, following you anywhere hoping you will very soon find somewhere to escape from the crowd that judges and points at us. It is not only the dreams of the crowds, it´s the dreams where we find ourselves in the backseat of a car, someone drives it and we´re going home but we know we have escaped everyone and there´s no where to go, were trying to start from nothing and were worried, and I´m regretting leaving a man I love so much behind....This man is my real boyfriend.

There´s also the fragments of dreams that I go to England... It took me a whole year to place the pieces together to understand the outcome... Once In england, I was in a loft, apartment, with you... The apartment was white, blank, empty, only a bed, a few windows, spacious, a plant by a window and a lot of light inside the room. The roof was atleast 4 meters high, maybe even more. And I had beeen kidnapped by you. As soon as I saw you coming out of the bathroom I knew everything was wrong, It wasn´t my boyfriend, IT wasn´t Jesús, IT was you and I was horrified and worried, anxious, scared, sad for my boyfriend....but as the time went by my feelings changed and became dull, numb, just plain acceptance of what had come, the feeling of a life after returning to you and leaving him and everyone behind. Made up my mind, empty.

Ese sueño donde voy a acompañar a mi madre a homedepot y me mandas un mensaje en whatsapp que deseas verme... yo se que no debo ir y aun asi, despues de tanta insistencia, logras convencerme y de pedir un didi. El dia se presenta nublado, oscuro, a punto del chubasco y mi madre ya puede olerse que estoy nerviosa, como siempre suele hacerlo en la vida real. Y le digo que tengo que irme a hacer tarea con amigas y me cuestiona la hora, ya que es tarde noche.... Le invento cualquier mentira y me cree y asi es como logro escabullirme en didi para ir a un bar a verte. Despues de tanto tiempo, se siente como una vil traicion verte a escondidas. Aun a sabiendas de lo que podría hacerle a Jesús. Pero por alguna razon decido hacer caso omiso y me logras cegar con tu fanfarria de siempre. I don´t know, it always happens that way, you in the distance, so far far away. Sometimes I get to see you standing in your male, ordinary form, same short curly brown hair, tired face, pale skin, long sleeve shirt, skinny jeans and worn converse shoes. Waiting, patiently, a smirk on your face, slightly open lips, a deathly gaze but somehow you always manage to lurr me into you. Your glare, maybe the things you say, chantings and lullabies but I never see your lips moving. Because you´re speaking in the air and that seems to make me cave into you, like a moth drawn to the light, not caring what I leave behind, What I worked too hard for, All the suffering, all the love I gave to another man and all the love I received from him, all my physical deterioration, my many mental revolutions and my labor. Thought I had healed me, Thought I had changed my trauma, my nervous system, my memories, just so you can come back one night and smash them with an ever-so-slightly grip of your hand. Like nothing ever paid so costly, Like a year never went by and like my spirit never broke. Like my will was never questioned and my anger never detonated. I don´t know why you come at night to take me back, doing what you have only known best which was sabotage us into absolute demise. You make me yearn all of it, the feeling of home, because I don´t dare go back to the pain of my despicable mother anymore, not anymore when I find all of it in you. My father would be so disappointed in me If I willingly accept you. I am kinda am, too...because I know I would. Luckily for me, my vanity and my pride is bigger than you. It´s always bigger than everyone. I don´t think anyone will find a way to break those walls down for the sake of me. I wish someone would, I despise building walls so big they inprison my light, my good heart. Maybe it´s better that way, Not a single person has shown me to not take advantage of their power to humiliate and abuse in the name of their ego and self satisfaction. Not even my father sometimes, but yet again, it´s not his fault, he´s excused. don´t want to write any further. Sleeep time

[todaysbiggesthits]

The Exam

Best Music Moment of 2022

JD: February: Had some time to kill in LA before the Mrs. arrived that led to a surreal first spin of the Beach House record that started while waiting at a crosswalk next to a guy in a bush smoking crack in front of a gas station pumping at six bucks a gallon and ended when I gave up trying to drag my roller bag up the Runyon Canyon dirt path past a cadre of influencers shooting workout content.

Code: playing on-theme firepower jams* out of the new deck's new outdoor speaker while taking in new views. full blast stones on 16th street for the first time in ages. hearing heckler spray live. jonas crumbling to the beauty of ceremony.while slurping down 20 dollar ipa's *

Best Shows Seent in 2022

Code: alien boy - lincoln hall pavement - chicago theater new order - northerly island

JD: 1. Animal Collective at Brooklyn Steel 2. LCD Soundsystem Original Lineup Set at the DFA 20th Anniversary Party at Knockdown Center (the 3am Black Dice set should probably be #1) 3. Wild Nothing and THUS LOVE at Le Poisson Rouge 4. The War on Drugs at Madison Square Garden 5. Automatic and Horsegirl at a very jank mini-fest in Rockefeller Plaza

Confession of 2022

Code: i think i like country again?

Biggest Disappointment of 2022

Code: i played the same four mixes for the entire year 

JD: Adieu, Kanye.

Most Overrated of 2022

Cig: that alex g album that ppl really liked wasn't all that cool

Make It Stop 2022

JD: Whatever’s going on with concert ticket prices.

Code: i am repulsed by the motomami album art. the reaction was immediate and has only increased after more exposure. (editor’s note: Good news, it appears Tumblr has blocked it.)

Biggest TBH Regret of 2022

Codemin: not sending a single recommendation to the thread.

JD: Missing Devo, Aldous Harding, Jenny Hval, P.E., New Order and Pet Shop Boys, Turnstile, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, The Smile, et al. in the big post-lockdown rush.

Detective Murtaugh of 2022

JD: I ate tickets to Colleen Green because I fell asleep at 8:45.

Code: in an effort to recreate her album art, willow performed the most impotent guitar smash during her snl performance. i rewound it four times and haven't stopped talking about it. 

Resolution for 2022 Status

JD: Got rid of the news, time to work on the podcasts. How It Went: Felt very proud of myself for skipping “The Keanu Reeves Hall of Fame” today.

Code: -make just one classic playlist How It Went:  i made two. one curation of my tbh singles submissions:

and another of my fave pitchfork singles:

-listen to more oral histories of bands I like How It Went: i read a kids book about Elliot Smith

Resolution for 2023

JD: More Lou.

Code: -pony up and go see a show at salt shed. fever ray? -load neil's discography onto my phone. i'm too often humming his tunes and then can't play powderfinger on the way home from the office.

Most Anticipated of 2023

Codeman: i think dom has something coming out, lol.  i'd like to hear a new alien boy and krakow loves adana.

JD: Yo La Tengo, Yves Tumor, The Golden Dregs

(very important editor’s note: ?!?!?):

[the--blue--witch]

09/03

Tengo muchas ganas de ponerle el cabecero a la cama pero me va a a dar pena no entrar por ahí xd.

Me he terminado Seda y me ha encantado.

La canción de Prometo no olvidar me recuerda muchísimo a ti. También quiero que escuches la de Lol de Cuando diga ya y La vida moderna.

El capítulo de Hablando con un indie de La pija y la quinqui creo que te puede gustar. Es gracioso.

En el trabajo bien, pero no socializar se me hace bola.

Todavía no han sacado la canción de eat your young o de labour pero tengo muchísimas ganas.

Odio perder así que no creo que te hable, pero esta semana ha habido ratos que me han costado más que otros.

-----

A partir de aquí las cosas que no te contaré.

Odio a los hombres como género. Ea así de rotunda y categórica. Mi hermana me convenció de meterme en Bumble dates y mira... No es para mí. Uno diciendo que Sebs de lalaland merecía más y yo en plan?????? No, o sea ese no es el punto qué?????? Y con el único que he quedado simpático hasta que se pasa con las bromas, de verdad que no tolero. Harta estoy. Me molesta que digas que las tías lo tenemos más fácil me molesta sobre manera y esto si te lo sacaré a colocación pero bueno.

I'm starting to regret him. Lo cual me parece un problema, pero esta semana se me ha hecho bola pensar porque le quería y porque seguí luchando por estar en una relación en la que cada x tiempo y desde el principio salía una red flag. A lo mejor te sienta como el culo pero estoy muy contenta de darme un tiempo porque tengo vicios que llevo arrastrando mucho. No sé no me gusta arrepentirme de haber salido con alguien. Me he arrepentido de no haber roto con alguien antes pero esto?? Esto es la primera vez que me pasa. I can't believe I let myself be fooled by a pretty brain and sharp cheekbones.

[michaeldemiurgossociety]

De acuerdo, yo oí por allí que Michael es el anti Lucifer, o sea, es virgen, ectc.Pero ¿ qué hay de esos talentos que Lucifer no tiene?Por ejemplo, Michael podría ser uno de los pocos ángeles que saben pintar un cuadro. Tengo el headcannon de que Lucifer era el modelo desnudo de Michael ( tanto en forma femenina como masculina) antes de la Rebelión. 

Ahora, imaginemos a Chloe en la s04. Ella está arrepentida, pero va a ver a Lucifer en su mansión. Lucifer está allí, con un delantal horrible, el pelo destrozado. Y a su lado hay una hermosa mujer morena, con curvas, desnuda y sentada en un diván. Chloe piensa lo peor, pero la mujer habla con "Detective". Michael tiene un ataque de frustración porque esa humana- milagro entró cuando estaba por crear un cuadro de una estrella que muere brillando. "Escucha, humana, tengo tiempo prestado, he tirado tres cuadros a la basura y este bloque artístico me tiene hasta las pelotas". 

Y Chloe tiene un despertar bisexual, porque Lucifer es caliente en forma femenina. Me imagino a Elizabeth Hurley como fem Lucifer.

También tengo el headcannon de que a Lucifer no le gustaba entrenar cuando era Samael, por lo que él prefería las artes como el canto y la cocina.A Samael le gustaba cocinarle a Azrael y a Michael. Después de la cena familiar de la s05, Michael roba el suffle que cocinó Lucifer, y él   se lo come entre lágrimas. Y llora, porque sabe que aunque extraña a su gemelo hay demasiados sentimientos encontrados. 

----

Translation:

We agree, or I heard here that Michael is the anti-Lucifer, things like he’s the virgin… etc. But what talents does Michael have that Lucifer doesn’t? For example, Michael could be one of those angels who know how to paint a portrait. I have this head cannon that Lucifer was a nude model for Michael (in a female form usually, not a masculine one) before the Rebellion.

Now, let’s us imagine Chloe in season four. She’s regretful, but she goes to see Lucifer at his mansion. Lucifer is there, with a horrible smock/apron and distressed hair. And at his side is a beautiful, dark-haired woman with curves, and she’s naked and sitting on a divan/sofa. Chloe thinks the worst, but then the woman says “Detcetive.” Michael is frustrated because this human…this miracle has come in when he was creating a painting of a star that shone brightly.

He says to Chloe “Listen here, lady, I am on borrowed time, I’ve already thrown three drafts in the trash, and I have this artist’s block that has me by the short hairs.”

And that’s when Chloe has a bisexual awakening since Lucifer is very hot in a female form. I imagine Elizabeth Hurley as the female version of Lucifer.

Also, I have a separate head cannon that Lucifer never liked to train when he was Samael, and for that reason, he always preferred arts like singing and cooking instead. For example, Samael used to like to cook for Azrael and Michael. So, after the family dinner in season five, Michael steals the souffle that Lucifer cooked, and he eats it while in tears. Michael’s crying because he know that even though he misses his twin there are too many conflicting feelings between them.

[fancyfade]

[image: a series of comic panels from blue beetle (2006) featuring Jaime Reyes as the blue beetle. his suit looks the same, but his wings change. in the first panel, his wings look like two halves of a large, clunky, segmented shield, and he says “ok. cool.” the next panel they look pretty much the same, and he is holding paco as he flies up from an area with a lot of people and says “i am so going to regret this.” next panel shows Jaime with wings that are now a little more shaped like butterfly wings, but they stil lhave the segmenting that was a bunch of plates stuck together. they are slightly thinner front to back when they were as a shield and they have little circular indents on the top 3 segments. next panel shows jaime hovering above peacemaker. his wings are now partially transparent, attached to two pole like structures that support them. the wings have two segments and the top segment is much larger and blunter than the bottom segment. he says “up ahead. mine shafts. would you kill me?” the next panel shows the same wings, but kind of folded up as jaime flies. next panel is from issue 13. his wings are still partially transparent but are now more classically butterfly shaped. next panel shows him with very similar wings, but the top segment is starting to get longer and sleeker. the panel is labelled “the south pole” and jaime is flying above guy gardner. guy (who is mostly off panel) says “it turns out my bosses fought this reach of yours. something like forty, fifty thousand years ago.” Jaime asks “did they win?” the final panel shows jaime with his partially transparent wings, which are now only one segment and are long and sleek. he holds a kid in one arm and reaches down his other hand and says “señora, aqui. yo lo tengo” end image]

Blue Beetle (2006): issues 1, 3, 10, 12, 13, 14, 17

Love the evolution of Jaime’s insect wings

[endlessly-cursed]

can i request valexen if the spanish song asks are still open,,,if they aren’t then just delete this :)

Honey you know I can't say no to Valexen so <3

Sybil Vixen and Valentina de Valerio: Llorar, Jesse y Joy

Me perdí buscando ese lugar / I got lost looking for this place

Todo por tratar de demostrar / For trying to prove

Olvidé que sin tu amor no valgo nada / I forgot that without your love I am worth nothing

Y tomé una vuelta equivocada / And took a wrong turn

Me quedé sin movimiento / I no longer had movement

Sin saber por donde regresar / Not knowing where to come back

Lleno de remordimiento / Full of regret

Dejándote detrás, fingir ser alguien más/ Leaving you behind for someone else

Y llorar (y llorar), y llorar (y llorar) / And to cry, and to cry

No sirve de nada ahora que te perdí / It's worth nothing now that I lost you

Te quiero resucitar / I want to resurrect you

Ven, sálvame, despiértame, rescátame / Come, save me, wake me up, rescue me

Del sufrimiento, oh no / From the suffering

Del sufrimiento / From the suffering

Tengo la esperanza que el dolor / I have the hope that the pain

Cambie y se transforme en tu perdón / Changes and turns into your forgiveness

Navegar en un mar sin fantasmas / To navigate in a sea without ghosts

Y la luz de tu amor sea mi mapa / and that the light of your love will be my map

Juro que es verdad, no miento / I swear it's true, I don't lie

Que mi voluntad es el cambiar / That my will is to change

Pero sola yo no puedo / But I can't on my own

No sé como lograr, mi alma reparar / I don't know how to accomplish, to repair my soul

Y llorar, y llorar (y llorar) / And to cry, and to cry

No sirve de nada ahora que te perdí / It's worth nothing now that I lost you

Te quiero resucitar / I want to resurrect you

Ven, sálvame, despiértame, rescátame / Come, save me, wake me, rescue me

Del sufrimiento / Of the suffering

Del sufrimiento / of the suffering

Del sufrimiento / of the suffering

Now I will no longer cry alone >:)