#you can't sacrifice everything including your own happiness

[soaringwide]

Pick a Card: What do you need to hear right now?

Hello and welcome back to a new pick a card reading!

Today is a general and open one, where we're going to look at What you need to hear right now.

As always this is a general reading meant for multiple people so it might not resonates 100%. There are only three piles and a shit ton of you. Takes what resonates and leave out the rest.

Check out my pinned post for more pick a cards or to book a paid reading.

PILE 1

Cards: 10 of Cups, King of Swords, 5 of Swords, the Chariot, the Empress, the Hanged Man, Queen of Cups, 4 of Pentacles, the High Priestess, Sweet Oblivion, Acceptance

Right now, you seem very preoccupied, by the idea of happiness and emotional fulfillment. I see you wanting more from life and not wanting to settle for your current circumstances. You are an idealist who wishes to enjoy life to its fullest, and I think that includes multiple areas of you life because you don't want to neglect any aspect of it.

But at the same time, there is this idea that your idea of ultimate happiness is an ideal, and ideals are not reality. Reality is uncertain and mysterious, we never know what's around the corner, and I think you're trying to get a hold of that by using your logic over your heart to try to understand and break down what it is you want from life. Truth is, when we want something, even when we get it, it never quite look like what we imagined, and that's quite a struggle when we want to control outcomes.

And I think you're fully aware of the fact that there are going to be some losses on your path towards this beautiful goal of yours. Perhaps you even have already experienced some. You might be wondering if that was all worth the effort in the end and feeling quite defeated on the inside. There might be frictions with you values and feeling like you have to sacrifice something dear to you.

However, despite these sour feelings, you feel like you have to stay determined to make it work and get out of the realm of what's known and comfortable. With the Chariot paired with the Empress, representing respectively Cancer and Venus, there is this idea of slow but unstoppable movement toward you ideal. It's really hard for you to let give up, unthinkable even. Both characters are crowned in stars, representing the hope for something better and the faith you have for yourself.

What you don't see, however, is that you are currently trapped in your own perspective and struggling to see things in a new angle. You are tied to the emotional baggage of your past and it's like you're trying to run away from the pain but you can't, you're stuck with it because its part of yourself, of your story. And I think to some extent you fail to see how these past emotions are affecting the way you see the situation. You learned to be very protective of your well-being, up to a fault because, right now, this inflexibility is creating struggle and pain where there is no need for it.

I also see that you're so focused on the prize that you're blinding yourself to everything else, which is part of why you are stuck in some way.

You advice regarding this situation is all about accepting that you cannot control everything, nor that you should. As we pointed out things will not always unfold the exact way you want them to, which is not necessarily a bad thing. You don't need to know everything, to see 10 steps ahead. It's okay to not know what you are doing, no one does. Yes you are doing that because you want to feel safe, but that's not how reality works. You can't trick your mind into thinking you have full control over your life, that's a delusion, and you're missing out on the mysterious adventure that is life.

So you need to let go a bit, surrender your desire for control and float through life with peace in your heart. What will be, will be. Some things cannot be changed with force and willpower alone. Some things are out of your control and all you can do is accept and let things unfold naturally. Right now you need to let loose a little and learn to have more faith in life and to trust that sometimes, the detours are exactly what we need to experience.

Key words: crisis of faith, winning at all costs, go big or go home, sunken cost fallacy, if i don't help myself then who will, crawling out of a hole, disillusionment, swimming against the current vs floating with it

PILE 2

Cards: King of Cups, Empress, 7 of Pentacles, the Hermit, the High Priestess, 3 of Swords, Ace of Wands, 7 of Cups, 8 of Pentacles, the Hanged Man, 3 of Cups, 8 of Swords, Rebirth

What you're being asked to look at today, is your emotional balance and the emotional work you've done on yourself to nurture and repair. It seems you've been working at it for quite some time, steadily and patiently. You've been caring for yourself, healing, like a gardener working in his orchards day after day, waiting for the harvest to finally come.

And you did quite well it seems! A lot has been accomplished already. You've done the work and sought inner knowledge; with bravery you looked at every shadow, every past hurt, every trauma, and you've learnt so much from it. You really consciously took the matter into your own hands and were directly acting on your issues. It still hurts at time though and you might be wondering when it will cease to be painful. Truth is, you keep touching the wound so it's probably not helping. I see you quite stuck in waiting for this harvest, the harvest being the point where you feel finally free from all of this ready to seize life again.

You also went through a time of isolation that made you stronger, but I'm also getting that you're struggling to get out of that isolation mode out of comfort and fear mostly. Sometimes when we go through something hard, it makes us feel alienated from others, like it's hard to relate to the everyday problems of people who were lucky enough not to go through something traumatic. It can make you feel envious, or at the very least, a bit disgusted and void of interest to connect with those people, because they just don't get it, and honestly, some people lack the emotional intelligence necessary to handle people who suffered a lot…hence the isolation.

What you don't see, is that you're ruminating your problems and that it's past the point of being helpful. It's like you're going over it again and again and again, trying to see if you can find yet another answer that would end the search once and for all. You're clearly overthinking your feelings and obsessively trying to find a solution to something that has none. What is done is done. Yes you need to mourn, yes you need to let time and introspection sooth the pain, but at some point, the only thing left to do is to move forward again.

The advice regarding this is that you need to drastically change your ways. Flip the way you live on its head. The cards point at getting out of this isolation mode, because the only thing holding you back is yourself in this case. It's like you're scared of going out into the world. You might not feel ready. You might not feel strong enough. You might not feel adequate for this world. But it's not true, it's just another result of overthinking your past hurt. It's time to step out and connect with other people. Celebrate, have fun, laugh, connect with others sincerely and without fear of not being understood. Yes some people won't get it but you'll also be pleasantly surprised by others, and you won't know until you tried.

It's time to leave the old behind, the old being those past hurt you're so familiar with, and this way of being you became so used to contain yourself in. You've spent enough time in the cocoon, now is time to break free from it and spread your wings. It might not be easy in the beginning, you might need to learn to fly again and it will be scary, but it's so, so worth it.

So ask yourself what living your life fully looks like to you. If you were completely free if nothing was holding you back, what would you want to? What would you want to become? Switch the overthinking from the tiny box you stuck yourself in, to the expansiveness of a mind that wants to reach to every corner of the world. The sky is the limit and it's time you look up.

Key words: breaking the shell, chrysalis, rebirth, being stuck in a maze of your own creation, scared to open up, meaningful connections, sunlight, removing the bandage

PILE 3

Cards: 6 of Pentacles, 6 of Swords, 2 of Cups, 2 of Swords, 2 of Pentacles, 10 of Cups, Page of Swords, 3 of Cups, 5 of Swords, 7 of Swords, 10 of Pentacles, 8 of Pentacles, the Great Goddess, Spirit of the Tree

The theme of your reading today is centered around the way you connect to others, be they people or spiritual forces.

More precisely, in the act of service you do for others, with a strong emphasis on keeping the balance in the exchange and the necessity to preserving the harmony between your thoughts and feelings.

With two 6 cards in this position, this highlights reflecting on the way you find the middle point in the way you give and receive your time and energy, but also what it costs you mentally and emotionally. This is a general reading so it's quite nebulous without context, but to some it could point at a specific relationship, or if you're someone who provides service for others, it could point at that, and it could also be relevant for those who do spiritual work.

In any case, what you're clear on in this situation, is that you've reached a point of no return. It's just no possible to keep doing things as you're doing them right now. You've been contemplating this recently and reached the conclusion that you can't make everyone happy at all costs, despite your desire for things to be perfect for all involved. You are sacrificing yourself in the process, to an extent that is not healthy for you. Exchanges between people are never fully balanced and that's just reality, but in the long run you should find some type of balance and not just giving yourself to keep everyone happy but yourself.

What you don't see in this situation is that you're getting the short hand of the stick when it doesn't have to be the case. If every interaction feels like a battle that you have to fight to sourly win, then was it really a win? Others can be here for you as well, for support and enjoyable shared moments. You should be able to all get something from this. If they never give you that, is it truly worth investing yourself in it?

There is a strong need for protecting your boundaries mentally as well. You don't see how letting others step all over you is detrimental to the way you perceive life. It maintains you in your little box where you need to expand your horizon. I think you somewhat lost that side of you. The side that seeks truth, that is strongly rooted in its individuality and critical mind. The you that seeks mental stimulation and adventurous ideas.

For the advice, you need to be honest with yourself because from what I understand, you do see the situation clearly, but for some reason, you're not acting on it. It's like you're lying to yourself a bit. You keep trying to make things work in this very unbalanced state, harming yourself in this task for the sake of others.

You need to look further and think of your abundance and legacy. What will you be remembered for? For what you did to others? It's very noble of you, but what about your enjoyment of life? What about your personal goals? What about what your heart desires?

Think of trees: we now know that despite being fully rooted in themselves and being whole and independent life forms, they do live in community and are able to communicate with each others across species and help each other. The big tree provides shade to the small plants, and the small plants keep the ground moist and fertile. They all benefit from this and create an ecosystem for all to live in.

You are being called to re-balanced things within you and in your life. To get to the root of this blockage you have regarding exchange and service in order to transform yourself. Perhaps what you're doing is actually detrimental to your ultimate goal, and being a bit more focused on yourself, selfish, even, would be the key for more stability.

Key words: giving and receiving, overworking yourself, beneficial selfishness, harmony between extremes, losing yourself in the work, waking up to what matters to you, long term goal, the wisdom of trees, creation and destruction

[respectthepetty]

The entire episode was about growing up, and San Pang started it by stating that not only had Yuan grown up, but that Qian had also.

He pointed out how Qian is taking care of himself in small ways like cutting up the fruit, which ironically only Yuan gets to enjoy.

Then when Yuan tries to speak to Qian, Qian gets upset that Yuan knocks instead of just coming in and states that Lili and Yuan are grown now, so they can do whatever. But Qian is upset about it.

Xiong reminds Qian that Lili and San Pang are adults and implies Qian is the one being childish about this by hiding out in the office and giving Lili and San Pang the silent treatment.

Even though Lili is upset, Yuan reminds her that this is Qian's norm. Qian will pick silence and avoidance rather than crying or screaming.

Which is why Yuan is leaving space for Qian to directly state what he needs.

Yuan waited until Qian told him he could come home before he came home

Yuan left Qian's room and closed the door instead of staying with him

Yuan waited for Qian to say something when Qian woke up before he revealed he was awake as well

Yuan gave everyone else a drink first (because Qian never asked for one)

Yuan knocked on Qian's door and waited to be told he could enter

Yuan didn't ask Qian to go out even though it was his idea and he told Lili to do it, but he waited until Qian texted him to ask

Yuan said they could cancel the fishing trip and made Qian state that he still wanted to go

Yuan didn't put on Qian's seat belt, then asked Qian if he wanted him to do something

Yuan has only passively mentioned the confession, but he waited until Qian directly brought it up on the fishing trip to address the lingering question - do you want me too?

For the entire episode, we kept hearing about "growing up" and being a "grown up." San Pang confirmed that Qian has grown. Qian, just like Yuan's cactus that he took care of, might still be prickly, but he has grown significantly over the course of the series.

Qian sent Yuan away through San Pang. He never spoke to Yuan about it directly. Then, he kept Yuan away by never speaking to him.

Qian's norm is to shut down, which is why he was a great enforcer for the mafia. He disconnects and goes into survival mode, but now he is no longer just surviving. He is taking care of himself. He is stating what he wants and what he doesn't want. And it's soooo tiny that it seems unremarkable, but for a guy who never asks for anything for himself, it's huge!

Qian doesn't have a selfish bone in his body. He has done everything for his family, even sending Yuan away. He was a victim of abuse. He has boundaries, but he also doesn't believe he has a right to ask of anything beyond a good family. Everyone being healthy is a blessing in itself, so what else could he ask for?

Yuan can come back home, but Qian can't ask for Yuan to come back to him. That's selfish. Lili asked for family time, and this is Yuan's only available time, so Qian can't cancel. That would be selfish. He can't ask his brother or sister with bright futures to stay with him. That would be selfish. He can't ask to be loved when his own parents couldn't do that. That would be selfish.

Yet Yuan is going to show Qian it's okay to selfish.

And make him ask for what he wants.

[buggachat]

I'm so curious to hear your thoughts. do you think Gabriel will ACTUALLY die? Or Nathalie? or will they both get healed??? Will Emilie actually get revived? The latter was always something I thought the show would do, but I also feel like this show is hard to predict sometimes. If Emilie does come back, I can't imagine she'd be too thrilled when she learns what Gabe's been up to that the two of them would go back to being a happy loving couple. #eminath2022

honestly it's SO HARD to predict how this series could possibly end. Adrien's story is so clearly set up as a tragedy, completely doomed by the narrative, and there's sufficient foreshadowing that he could possibly die/be sacrificed.... but I also believe that IF that happens he'd be revived and will ultimately receive a happy ending, because he's a main/beloved character of a children's show (also future-chat noir was alive in timetagger). So how will Adrien get a happy ending? Who will parent this child? UHHHHH

Personally, I really hope they don't revive Emilie, even if that's maybe the most obvious way for Adrien to have a happy ending. I think it'd maybe be a little questionable for kids who watch the show and relate to Adrien's struggles of losing a parent, and also I think that it'd kind of... prove Gabriel right? I think Gabriel would happily sacrifice ANYTHING, including his own life, to save Emilie, and I think him essentially doing that, sacrificing EVERYTHING to revive Emilie, and then everyone in the show being better off for it and it being the "happy ending" would kind of mess with the themes. Gabriel isn't supposed to be right. He's supposed to be wrong, he's supposed to be deluded that Emilie can be saved, he's supposed to be wrong in refusing to mourn her properly and move on, and with those themes in mind I don't think it'd make sense for her to be brought back. Maybe temporarily, but not permanently, y'know?

As for the fate of Gabriel and Nathalie.... I DON'T KNOW.... I DON'T KNOW!!! I feel like I almost want to say that Gabriel will just flat out die, but can they do that??? It's a kids show??? WOULD they kill Gabriel??? I don't know!! I DON'T KNOW.... but also there's something so poetically beautiful about Gabriel being the cause of his own demise, y'know? He did this to himself. This is his punishment. Ladybug and Chat Noir don't even have to decide his fate, he decided it himself, and I love that. And even if they find a way to heal the cataclysm, would it heal his mind after being driven mad by all the miraculouses? I...... I don't know that they can do that. How weird would it be, if the series ended with Gabriel suddenly healthy in body and mind again? And then what? He goes back to raising Adrien like nothing happened? It's almost easier to picture him flat out dying, or going to prison with an implied shortened lifespan or something. Gabriel should not continue to have custody of Adrien after all is said and done.

Nathalie would make more sense to survive, I suppose, because even if her fate has been sealed for longer and more solidly, she's a more redeemable character. In fact, I'd say Passion implies that she's very redeemable now, and is even actively trying to step in and be a mother-figure to Adrien now, which makes her a solid contender for being Adrien's post-plot guardian... but it still doesn't feel quite right, because just like Gabriel, Nathalie did this to herself, and her illness is her poetic punishment for her crimes, and we have no reason to believe that her illness can be cured, and we know it's fatal because of Emilie. That, and even if she regrets it now, she still aided and abetted Adrien's abusive father.... so........ I................... .....?

I'm really at a loss here, because I can't predict at all where this could all possibly go. If not Emilie, Gabriel, or Nathalie, who will take care of Adrien?

I know a lot of people use Gorilla for this role, and I don't blame them because there's really no other option, but I've never bought it. Gorilla is.... essentially just.... Some Vaguely Decent Man™ who works for Gabriel, and I really don't get anything from him or from his relationship with Adrien beyond that. Like yes, he's nice to Adrien in a way that probably any Vaguely Decent Man™ would be, and Adrien likes him fine in the same way that Adrien likes everyone, but that's... kind of it? Fanon takes Gorilla and Adrien's relationship and runs with it, and that's fun and all, but in canon there's virtually nothing there, and I'm sure that if Gorilla adopting him was the intended ending, they'd be developing their relationship more than the nothing that we've gotten.

All that really leaves is Amelie, his aunt, who lives in a different country? That seems the most logical, but also would have a huge affect on future seasons of the show if Adrien left the country. Maybe there's some interesting plot stuff they could do with that, and with Adrien and Félix living together, but it almost feels too AUish for me to comfortably predict that it would happen in canon.

sorry this turned into a long ramble where my conclusion is basically a big "I don't know". But anyway, I'm actually really excited to see where this all ends up! I love how unpredictable this show can be.

My only semi-Serious prediction is: I can just picture an episode where Gabriel actually wins, where he recreates his world, and maybe Adrien isn't in it, like Adrien was the one transferred to the casket in the basement (or maybe Adrien was the one who made the wish, and willingly chose to sacrifice himself, because of Adrien's established sacrificial tendencies? idk), and Emilie denounces Gabriel and walks out on him and Gabriel realizes that everything that he's done has been for nothing, that his dream was never real and never could be, and then they somehow undo that timeline and bring everything back into the regular timeline. Idk how any of that would happen, but I'd like it so :)

("It's just bad writing" No Fun Allowed responders DNI)

[silverskye13]

(about the latest drabble): I'm sorry, Welsknight's code of honor says what

Gotta love Chivalry!

Welsknight in RnS is trying is ready best to be a good knight, but he has no church to swear fealty to [unless he builds one himself] and no Knightly Order to train and be ordained with [unless he builds one himself] so unlike Helsknight, who sought out a church in hels and got knighted the Ye Olde Fashioned Way, Welsknight follows the rules of Poetic Chivalry. The more he and Helsknight have fought it out, the more Helsknight's tenets have been incorporated into Welsknight's idea of Chivalry [and Helsknight's tenets themselves are based on Chivalric Laws anyway] but still, their personal creeds are a little to the left of each other.

With that little rant out of the way, the Chivalric Laws I'm using for Welsknight are augmented from Léon Gautier's Ten Commandments of Chivalry:

Thou shalt believe all that the Church teaches and thou shalt observe all its directions.

Thou shalt defend the Church.

Thou shalt respect all weaknesses, and shalt constitute thyself the defender of them.

Thou shalt love the country in which thou wast born.

Thou shalt not recoil before thine enemy.

Thou shalt make war against the infidel without cessation and without mercy.

Thou shalt perform scrupulously thy feudal duties, if they be not contrary to the laws of God.

Thou shalt never lie, and shalt remain faithful to thy pledged word.

Thou shalt be generous, and give largesse to everyone.

Thou shalt be everywhere and always the champion of the Right and the Good against Injustice and Evil.

For the sake of RnS, which has vague gods and saints in hels, but only the gods and saints players make everywhere else, for Welsknight, all tenets about God and Church are Hermitcraft the Server and what it represents. The laws and teachings of Hermitcraft are its pledges to creativity and fairness and prosperity. He will defend it to his dying breath, because it's his home, and the living, breathing part of the universe that he and his friends create in. And any enemy of Hermitcraft is his personal enemy as well.

[I like to imagine the reason Welsknight didn't get involved in the HC x Empires crossover was because he was busy making sure the Empires crew wouldn't start a war he personally had to finish lol]

He really is trying his best.

The problem with Chivalry though, is it is inherently about crusades. Chivalric poems, while filled with a good bit of manner and courtly love, are also filled with the ideas of self sacrifice for a ruthless Good, a Good that roots out evil, with tragic grace. A Good that, ultimately, crusaded against whole countries, because Good wouldn't abide by Evil. Chivalry needs something to fight for. Otherwise it's just a basket of nice, convenient morals, a horse and a suit of armor. So you can imagine, in his own subtle, misguided way, Welsknight is actually quite happy hels exists. What good is a knight without something to fight for? Or better yet, to fight against, because it is very convenient to define yourself by everything your enemy isn't.

And his enemy isn't kind to him. His enemy must be a liar, because what he says about his worthiness as a knight can't be true. And his enemy must be cruel, because he seeks him out to hurt him. And his enemy must be relentless, because he hasn't given up yet. And his enemy is Helsknight, and everything Helsknight stands for, and apparently, Helsknight stands for quite a lot, including other people, and other people can be fought.

(He and Helsknight, despite every kick and scream to the contrary, really are a lot alike.)

[shygirl4991]

Coffee Prince and The Frog Prologue

A Collab with @lizaluvsthis and @alianarepasa

Art for this chapter cover included done by @alianarepasa Next Chapter Kid SMG3 and Family Reference by alianarepasa SMG4 and SMG3 Outfit Reference by Lizaluvsthis Summary: SMG3 is a busboy with a dream to run his own cafe, he slaves away at his friends restaurant in hopes to save enough to open his cafe. But when a talking frog named SMG4 asks for a kiss to break a curse placed on him, the two will end up going on  a journey that will change their lives forever. 

Tags: slow burn, inspired by Disney princess and the frog, love confessions, falling in love, animal transformation, adopted family relationship, fluff, angst, voodoo

In a mansion deep in the mushroom kingdom lives the Fungo family, a small rich family where twin boys lived with their father Bootleg and mother lady Rosea. A knock was heard echoing through the mansion late in the night. One of the servants runs to the door and opens it only to see a basket with a baby inside, she runs to grab the lord of the house. He steps outside and picks up the child confused, seeing the note tape to the blanket he reads it “SMG3? What a strange name for a child,” the baby's eyes open catching the man's attention. When his eyes met with the child's ruby red eyes it was over, he walked inside screaming to his wife “HONEY WE HAVE A NEW SON!” “WE WHAT!?” she yells back startled by the sudden news.

Nine years passed since then, the castle was shrouded in darkness as the lord of the house mourned the loss of his wife. He looked at the family photo and knew he had to be strong for his sons, the struggle was the youngest. Over time the twins Mario and Luigi started to act more like themselves, but that young boy he took in was becoming trouble. He walks around the house and notices black paint staining the floor, he sighs following it and catches the child painting his crown. “Three, what are you doing?” the child freezes as he slowly turns and gives him a smirk as he flashes his golden crown now with a skull on it “I was fixing my crown, gold is so lame but now look how awesome it looks!” He squints at his son before letting out a sigh “Three that crown just wont work, we come from an important family you can't just walk around with a skull on your crown!” SMG3 pouts cleaning up the extra paint on the crown then stares at the skull on it. After a few moments of thinking he placed it on his head “Then maybe i want to do my own thing! Mom always told me being different isn't bad.”  Three gives his father a smile only to lose it when Bootleg snatches the crown from his head “I will get this cleaned, now get ready it's almost story time you know your brother hates to miss it.” 

He watches his father walk away and sighs as he drags himself to Luigi’s room, seeing his younger brother Luigi pull Three in for a hug causing the younger sibling to panic and struggle to break free from the sudden affection. Luigi let's go giving a bright smile to him “Why so down?” “Dad didn't like my idea of adding a cool design to our crowns, what's wrong with wanting a skull on my crown! Ugh now he is going to read us gross love stories.” he groans sitting on the floor. He never cared for fairy tales; he rather sat down and read scary stories then listened to how some chick gave up her life for a dude she fell for to be happy with someone else. Luigi frowns “But love stories are amazing Three, the idea of going on some grand adventure with someone and falling for them how does that sound gross?” SMG3 lays on the floor staring at the green curtains thinking on how to explain to his brother. 

“If I learn anything from these stories dad read us, romance is all flowers and sunshine you have to sacrifice everything for some random person cause oh no my heart skips a beat! Maybe go get checked by a doctor if your heart is doing that idiot!”  Once he was done explaining he closed his eyes waiting for a reaction. His brother sighs sitting next to him “I think finding that certain someone is amazing, someone that just understands you where no one else can.” 

It took Three everything in him to not make a sarcastic remark, he opened his eyes and stared at the door. His father was taking too long meaning that Mario found the stash of pasta in the mansion again, his older brother was never the same after eating spaghetti in that party they went to last week. All he ever talks about is how he wants more spaghetti then throws a tantrum if he doesn't get any, if anything would be a fun fairytale to read it be the love story with his brother and the food.

The door swings open revealing their father with Mario tied up behind him “Story time kids!” Mario shakes his head trying to worm himself away “NO THAT'S GAY!” their father sighs, picking up the child “Mario don't say things like that around Three!” “Too late my mind has been filled with so much i dont think Mario’s high IQ talk can save me,” he chuckles earning a glare from his father.

He drops Mario next to his siblings as he takes out a book “Today’s story is princess and the frog,” hearing the title Three gets up excited, he remembers how his mother used to read him the story before bed. He never did understand how throwing a frog to a wall helped break a curse but it worked so who was he to judge how magic works. His dad smiled at him, surprised to see the young one finally interested in a story, as he kept reading that excitement was draining from the child's face.  Three was now laying on the floor asking for someone to take him away from the cringe, Luigi was in love with the story, and Mario was trying to eat the rope to break free. 

“The ugly little frog looked up with sad, round eyes and pleaded ‘oh please, dear princess, only a kiss from you can break this terrible spell that was inflicted on me by a wicked witch!’ the beautiful princess was so moved by his desperate plea that she stooped down, picked up the slippery creature and kissed him!” He smiles at the kids to see their reaction. Luigi giggled at the sweet story while SMG3 sat there eyes wide at his father, Mario gave up on escaping and fell asleep during the story.

Luigi got up and hugged his dad. “That was an amazing story, I hope I meet my frog prince.” SMG3 shakes his head running up to his older brother “ARE YOU SERIOUS?! KISSING A FROG WHAT IF YOU GET WARTS!" Three stare’s with disgust. Luigi shakes his head "Frogs don't give warts three," he turns to his brother "DOES SHE KNOW THAT?"

Luigi giggles at his brother's panic and pulls him into a hug “When it comes to love why not take that risk! Maybe you will get it when you meet your frog prince and or princess!”  SMG3 blushes trying to escape the hug, the thought of kissing a frog grossed him out and had no idea why his brother wanted to curse him with a frog. Their father chuckles, “Hey the princess won at the end the frog became a handsome prince!” 

Finally free from the hug Three glares at his father “Yeah cause man i just met that was a frog a second ago really yells marriage material!”  Bootleg sighs slamming the book shut “When you hit your twenties i expect you to change that tone!” SMG3 pouts at his fathers stern tone before they all get told to go to bed. Mario cheers being set free and runs off full speed on the hunt, Bootleg sighs as he starts to chase after Mario. SMG3 waves goodbye at his brother before heading to his room, changing into his skull pj’s he hops into bed and smiles softly at his frog plush “Oh Terrance, when will dad get that these fairytales are so lame! You know…mom understood,” he hears a bark making him sit up and squeal “Come here!” a small egg shaped dog jumps into Three’s arms excitedly. He loves his brother’s but there is nothing more comforting than a cuddle session with Eggdog. 

Slowly he falls asleep with Eggdog in his arms not hearing the door to his room open, Mario looks around and sneaks in, taking SMG3 plushie and running out of the room giggling. The door slams, waking Three up, he looks around the room with Eggdog and notices his plushie missing “What?” Mario was giggling as he thought of a perfect prank to do to his twin, since his brother was so into kissing frogs he was going to get his brother to kiss the frog plushie. The twist is he will have put hot sauce on the lips of the plushie, he keeps sneaking down the hallway till he hears barking. Turning around his eyes go wide seeing SMG3 charging down the hallway “HEY! LEAVE TERRANCE ALONE!” Mario takes a step back before running away from Three. 

Three growls as he charges at his older brother “Give him back!” Eggdog catches up biting Mario’s pants, in one swift movement Three grabs the arm of the plushie. SMG3 glares at Mario “LET GO MARIO YOUR GONNA BREAK IT YOU IDIOT!” Then it happens, the arm starts to tear causing Three’s eyes to go wide. Before he has a chance to let go the arm of the frog plush arm rips off, SMG3 falls to his knees with the arm in his hands. His eyes start to water causing Mario to panic “Mario can fix it look!” He takes the arm from Three and tries to shove the arm back into the plush. His attempt to fix the plushie only broke it more, seeing this Three break into tears “I HATE YOU MARIO!”

Panicking he runs and grabs his twin “LUIGI! SMG3 IS CRYING HELP!” Luigi sees the broken plush and pulls three for a hug “It’s okay Three dad can buy you a new one.” Hearing this, Three pulled away and wiped his tears glaring at his older brother “I don't want a new one! HE IS MY BEST FRIEND WHY DO YOU ALL THINK BUYING STUFF FIXES EVERYTHING!” he grabs his broken plushie and runs off to his room crying.

He sits on his bed wiping his tears, there had to be a way to fix his buddy. He sniffs as he thinks to himself, he walks to a drawer and gets tape “It’s okay Terrance i will fix ya buddy, Eggdog guard the door and don't let those people in.” Bootleg runs out of his room to see two of his sons panicking in the hallway, he pinches the bridge of his nose before calming them down. “Okay you two why are you freaking out in the hallway..did Mario do the pasta prank again?” He looks at his two kids. They go silent and seem scared, slowly he turns looking at the black door down the hallway “What did you two do to Three?” The twins both start speaking at the same time explaining what happened to the plushie making the man sigh as he walks over to Three’s room. 

He knocks on the door, Eggdog starts barking letting the child know someone was there annoyed he finishes taping the arm back on to his plushie. He then opens the door surprised to see his father “Heard about Terrance, you know son i have told you before that broken things are better off replaced but since this is Terrance i will get someone to fix him.” SMG3 looks up at his father with excitement “REALLY!?” Bootleg chuckles and pats his son's head “Yes, and I think you're old enough to finally pick your family hat, I'm thinking purple letter T?” 

Three pouts “No..that's lame i'm not like Mario and Luigi, can i just finally pick something thats…me?” Bootleg wasnt a fan of that idea knowing what the child might pick. After some thought he nods, Three jumps in excitement and hugs his father. 

The next day SMG3 dressed up making sure his vest was on right, they all stood together for a family portrait before heading out. Three was excited to pick out his hat, as far as he knows the families that have any kind of royal connections get a hat that they wear till the moment they get married and get a crown as a replacement. He didn't care so much about the crown, but the idea of having a hat made for him and no one can say anything about it excited him. That was till they arrived and all he was shown were classy hats that looked too fancy for his taste, he turned looking at his older brothers wearing their hats and frowns.

He sighs walking around the shop when he notices a halloween section, where his eyes meet with a purple cap with a skull on a black background on it. He picks it up and puts it on his head, he runs off to his father showing the hat “I found it! My forever hat!”  His father frowns seeing the skull on it “You…sure?” He gave a bright smile to his father, unable to say no to the smile he walked up to the cashiers and bought the hat. Three hugs his dad “I love you dad!” Bootleg chuckles hugging his son back. What they didn't know was this year was the last year SMG3 and his father would be this close. 

Twelve years later The alarm rings, a now twenty one year old SMG3 smacks it off and gets out of bed. He picks up his hair in a ponytail and washes his face, after brushing his teeth he puts on his casual wear, can never beat the classic overall look. He gives a quick smooch to Eggdog as he dashes into the kitchen to grab something fast to eat. Mario was already deep into his spaghetti while Luigi was waiting at the table to hand his brother his lunch for work. Three dashes into the kitchen and takes the lunch “Thanks, and Bootleg doesn't know where I'm working yet right? I need to warn my friends soon about him ugh.” Luigi giggles, giving Three a small pat. “He acts the way he does because you are so much like mom, he is worried you might get in trouble.”

SMG3 rolls his eyes “The only thing that asshole cares about is marrying us off, no thank you! Now work calls later losers!”  He gives his brothers a peace sign before leaving the mansion, he shivers slightly feeling the wind. He didn't mind feeling the cold after all he got to pick what to wear, not his overbearing father, he starts his walk to work humming to himself his favorite song from the beetlejuice musical. He pauses when he sees a crowd of women cheering excitedly, turning his head he sees a fancy ship was arriving “Oh yeah, that idiot prince is coming over ugh great these fangirls are going to make me late!” he looks around and chuckles as he lights a small firework that was in his pocket and tossed it. The firework then lands on a fire hydrant exploding and breaking it causing the water to splash on the crowd, he laughs seeing everyone running from the water worried about their makeup. Some of the women notice him and glare “Of course you would do this Three, why do you always have to bother us!?”

SMG3 shrugs “I don't know Belle, why don't you start using waterproof eye liner like I do,” she flips him off in which he returns the favor as he runs off to work. As he arrives Bob smacks his back “ABOUT TIME THE BOSS HAS BEEN BITCHING ABOUT YOU.” Three frowns as he looks at the back room, slowly he approaches and sees no one there but a frog toy. He picks up the toy to hear Bob laughing behind him “GET PRANKED! HEARD A RUMOR YOU HAVE A THING FOR FROGS!” SMG3 turns and tosses the toy at Bob “Countdown from five cause I'm going to kick your ass!” 

In a panic bob runs out of the room leaving Three alone, he sighs and sits on the couch “Thanks Luigi for telling people about our dad always reading that stupid story,” he takes out a piece of paper and unfolds it to reveal a drawing he did of a cafe “Remember why your doing this Three, we will own our dream cafe and no one can stop us. We will earn this, I will never accept his help.” His eyes drop to the frog toy in front of him and chuckles “And I don't need to kiss any frogs either!”  with that he gets up and gets ready for work. 

[pablitogavii]

Para la Victoria!

Spain won!! Vamos Campeoness!!

I know I've been inactive for awhile but I've been working on a series for y'all which still work in progress. Requests are open but I already have so many so don't expect me to able to answer quickly :( I chose them based on inspiration!

"Vitoriaaaa!!!" everyone around you was screaming, cheering, filming the celebrations all around the stadium while your eyes were glued on your boyfriend hugging his teammates in happiness.

Gavi gave his all to properly prepare for the final end of his season with the national team which included many sacrifices like not being able to be with you as much as he wanted.

He kept re-assuring you that he loves you and that he will give you everything this summer during which you will be his sole focus. He was also not allowed to be intimate the whole week since he started practicing and it was driving him absolutely crazy.

A few days ago..

"Amor, you can't stay the night.." he said while we were on his bed making out with me on too of him and his hands gripping my ass tightly.

"But why???" you whined leaning down and kissing his neck to his chest while he threw his head back holding onto your hair tightly. You were driving him insane!

"Because I can't control myself, amor...I want to fuck you so bad right now...and I can't" he moaned and you smirked nodding your head and kissing his plum lips again.

He promised you that night that the moment this game ends he will fuck you until you couldn't walk for weeks...you were excited to see weather he keeps his promise.

They let you pass to the hallway and Pablo ran off the pitch to meet you and the moment you saw each other you ran and jumped into his arms wrapping your legs round his waist while he held you close kissing your lips passionately not caring about the cameras.

"Here is Gavi..and his girlfriend..certainly excited to celebrate his victory together! They are considered one of the most beautiful couples in Spain currently... Gavi certainly deserves to enjoy ;)" commentator said while they filmed out moment but Pablo quickly put you down taking your hand and leading you to a more secluded area.

"I can't wait to get home amor..I want to be inside of you so bad preciosa!" he whispered into your ear before licking it and you blushed nodding your head while bitting your bottom lip letting him go change so you can leave quickly. You were glad he didn't forget his promise..;)

When you arrived home, he locked the door quickly turning around and grabbing your body before pinning you against the wall while kissing your lips feverishly.

"You know how much I love to see you in my jersey preciosa..but right now, I want all of the clothes off your beautiful body!" he groaned while devouring your neck leaving many marks on your gentle skin while you moaned.

He unzipped your skirt letting it fall to your feet, helping you take off your shoes as you pulled onto his own shirt making him smirk and take it off tossing it onto the ground. Then he grabbed your body making you snake your legs around his waist while his lips were back onto yours while he walked to the bedroom.

He put you down on the ground taking off his jeans and sitting on the bed in only his boxers looking at how perfect you looked with his national jersey that looked like dress on you..que perfecta! ;)

"Come here princesa.." he said and you slowly moved in between his legs feeling his cold hands on your ass moving up while pulling his jersey off your body a little surprised when he saw that you were wearing no bra underneath. He quickly smirked looking from you perky breasts to your eyes making you blush bright red.

"What did I say about not wearing a bra, princesa? HUh?" he spoke darkly while your hands went to cover your breasts in embarrassment but he took them away kissing in the middle while looking up into your eyes.

"To..ahh..um..always wear it when I'm not with you..fuck!" you tried answering but his licks were very distracting as you felt pleasure consume your mind.

"But I guess I can forgive you...after all, it's easy access for me now?" he smirked and I nodded while he held my breasts touching, licking and sucking on them while I moaned before pulling me onto the bed and hovering above you.

"I missed you so much..I missed this so much..that stupid rule!" Pablo groaned before kissing down your neck to your stomach leaving marks wherever he could before finally arriving to your panties pulling them down and tossing them on the ground. Shortly afterwards his boxers were on the floor as well and he was back up kissing your lips passionately.

He reached to the side and grabbed a condom opening it with his teeth while you played with his sweaty hair taking in the perfection of his body on top of your finally.

"I know it's been kinda long..so I'll let you adjust again okay princesa?" he said and when you nodded with a shy smile he entered you in one swift motion making you throw your head back in pain mixed with intense burning pleasure.

"Joder!! You're so tight preciosa..I haven't stretched you up for weeks!" he growled into your neck while you wrapped around like in a tight hold. After a few moment of staying still and letting you adjust while distracting you with kisses, he started to move with gentle stroked that turned into rough ones the moment you started to beg him for more.

"My perfect girl! Joder! Just like that..let me in" he spoke into your lips before flipping over and sitting up with you on his lap giving him better access to move deeper and hit all the right spots that brought you close to your first orgasm.

"Please don't stop Pablo..please I need to cum..please amor" you were a moaning mess and he reassured you that he won't stop and that you can let go with his strong hold holding you in place.

"Let go for me, princesa..show me who you belong to!" and those words were enough to tip you off the edge as your muscles spasmed and you came hard pushing him over his own edge as you both held onto each other breathlessly.

"That was amazing.." you said when you laid down on top of him as he held you tightly touching your back gently while staring into your eyes like that was the first time he's seen them.

You smiled moving again on top of him and starting to kiss down his chest again while he laid back with his arms behind his head looking down at you in amusement.

"What is this for amor??" his voice was shaking and you looked up kissing him softly before moving back down caressing his strong abs.

"Para la victoria.." you smirked and so did he as you were determined to make up for all the lost time..;)

[dustofthedailylife]

your "i'll see you again my loved one" teaser gave me an idea: which genshin (/star rail) men would sacrifice himself for you and which one would sacrifice the world for you?

i believe Kaveh and Cyno would give away himself for you without a doubt, Diluc and Zhongli maybe with a bit of hesitation; but Alhaitham would cook up the best plan in order to save you, and that includes sacrificing the world, that or Wanderer blasting his way through people just for you.

-🍼(sorry for the long ask)

Ooooh that's so interesting!

Hmmm, let me see.

GENSHIN

Would sacrifice himself for you → Kaveh, Cyno, Diluc, and Zhongli I agree with 100%! They would without a doubt sacrifice themselves for you if the need for it ever arises. → Baizhu. That man is just so selfless that he already sacrifices his own health and well-being to heal others. He also wouldn't hesitate one second to sacrifice himself to save you. → Itto. He just has such a good heart and he is a soft boy deep down. the chasm quest with him proved too that he would totally sacrifice himself. → Thoma and Kazuha are also candidates.

Would sacrifice the world for you → Alhaitham without a shadow of a doubt. He already doesn't care much about most people but you managed to snake your way into his heart. You're the only person who's so important to him he'd throw away the world if it means saving you. And ofc while cooking up the most convoluted plan known to man. → Wanderer as well 100%. He doesn't seem like he cares most of the time but if it came down to it he'd do everything to save you. Even if it means turning the world against him and taking it on by himself. → Ayato I can also see here. Considering how much he already does to keep his loved ones safe. As soon as you're part of that he'd do anything to make sure you're well. → Childe similar to Ayato shares a close bond with his loved ones. If anything threatened their safety he'd be more than happy to fight for you, even if it means it is him against the entire world. → Xiao. As soon as he lets someone in his heart they're sure to stay there forever. He doesn't trust easy but as soon as he does he would literally sacrifice the world for your sake. But I can see him as someone who would also sacrifice himself too. He could be both *looks at Chasm quest once again*

HONKAI

Would sacrifice himself for you → Gepard! If anyone from the cast would throw himself in the way of danger to keep you safe it's this man. → Dan Heng. He may seem cold and distanced but he wouldn't hesitate for one second to push you out of the way in the face of danger and take the blow instead. → Welt. I can't really explain this one but he gives me the gentle vibes and he'd fight tooth and nail to keep you safe. While he'll probably emerge victorious he's willing to sacrifice himself to keep you safe.

Would sacrifice the world for you → Jing Yuan. He's already lost so much in his lifetime so he isn't ready to grieve over you. Without a doubt he'd sacrifice the world if it meant you would be able to stay by his side. → Blade already doesn't particularly care much about the world as it is anyway. As long as he has you that's all that matters. Bye, world! → Sampo I don't see as the type of person to sacrifice himself so he'd look for a way to keep both you and him alive. That means, no matter the cost, he'd sacrifice it all to keep you safe.

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Hi! Other people have talked about this, but have you ever thought about how the destruction of Kaz's life led to the preservation of the other crows' lives? Without Kaz, none of the other five would have made it to the events of Six of Crows. Inej and Nina would've died at their respective brothels, Wylan and Jesper probably would've died in the streets of the Barrel, and Matthias would've died at Hellgate. I just think it's interesting and almost poetic how all the horrible things that happened to Kaz meant that he was in a position to protect the other crows from horrible fates themselves. Kaz was all alone with no one to help him, but he helped the other crows through his personal tradegy. Five lives were spared while one was destroyed. It's especially considering Kaz's 'destroy everything' mindset. I wonder if the crows realise this. I wonder if Kaz realises this. How would they all react? Sorry, this got really rambly, I just can't stop thinking about it. Do you have any thoughts about this? (Hope you don't mind me asking?)

Hi, first of all of course I don’t mind you asking I live getting questions so much!!! And second of all this is such an interesting topic and it’s so true!! This probably includes a lot of the same things that you’ve already said, but I’m just going to copy and paste a text message I sent my friend about this topic about a year ago:

“I’ve thought about this before and I really think it’s a true statement of Bardugo’s writing skill; they’re lives aren’t inexplicably intertwined or connected so they met by fate for an inscrutable purpose, but their connections with each other allow them survival and to achieve their purpose, whether they believe it to be divine or otherwise, but it’s Kaz, who feels outside of or desperate to the group, that is the cause of it all. He represents so much without doing anything, he is their entire life force in so many ways, but the real tragedy of his story is that his happiness was sacrificed because his purpose is to lead them to their purposes. Nina’s purpose is to unify Fjerda and Ravka, Matthias’ purpose is to lead her there, Inej’s purpose is to protect young people like her, Wylan’s purpose is to create change in the upper classes and to make people realise the hardships faced by everyone in the city, and Jesper’s purpose is to guide Wylan to that. But Kaz? Kaz doesn’t get his own fulfilment, he had to sacrifice his childhood to give them their fulfilment instead, but he will never realise that. His loss of Jordie means that all of them can achieve their purpose and change the world, but Kaz has been left with nothing but blame that he must find someone to pin on. So he gives it to Rollins. Rollins is by no means a good person, but the undeniable fact is that Jordie still would have caught the Queen’s Lady Plague, and probably still died from it because even the richest people who could afford medicine were still being killed by the outbreak. Kaz needs someone to blame and get revenge on so he can bring his own fulfilment about, and I think that’s the most heartbreaking thing about him. Everyone he’s ever cares for found their purpose, but he has nothing beyond destroying Pekka Rollins - and he even admits it himself. He says he’ll take down Rollins, and when asked what he’ll do next he says “I don’t know. Build an empire, then burn it to the ground” ”

Fun fact: that conversation culminated in me saying that I wished there was some way of writing my essays about the Grishaverse, or basically saying that essays shouldn’t be gatekept to academia and that if I want to write and publish studies of the Grishaverse then I should be allowed to. All of you have made that possible for me, it’s amazing, and I can’t believe there are nearly 1000 of you following along thank you so much

Thanks for your question!!!

[lalaluvvs]

vampire bf satoru

cw: slightly suggestive, fluff, bloodsucking (??)

Contrary to popular belief, Satoru Gojo definitely has a morning routine- one he follows from beginning to end. It's the only constant in his life, not including Suguru.

In fact, it was Suguru that suggested the routine and helped him stick to it. Gojo would probably be nowhere if it weren't for his best friend.

When Gojo wakes, he palms the bed groggily, searching for the familiar warmth beside him. It takes him a few tries before he finds purchase on a bare shoulder, its' owner grumbling with annoyance.

As part of his routine, Gojo will hold him close, chest to his chest as he runs a gentle finger down that sensitive part of his neck. He'll linger there a moment too long, hesitant to savor the skin there. He can smell the dark blood rising to his cold touch, eager to be released. His fangs extend from his mouth, small for a typical vampire but just the right size to stab into Suguru's neck. He winces at the sensitivity- he hates that part the most- and grazes them across his neck until they catch onto the scabbed lumps along the base of his nape. Meanwhile he holds his best friend like a lover, gliding careful fingertips over his back. Those same fingers dig into the flesh of his back while he slowly presses his fangs through the healing scabs.

If it were up to him, he would feed all over his neck, covering the expansive canvas in little love bites to mark his claim.

Suguru is almost never fully awake before feeling the fangs puncture the lower side of his neck. He prefers it this way, so he can get it over with. He's trained his body to sleep through a good amount of it, though he would generously trade his sleep for Satoru. He would be happy to give him everything- body and soul- if it could benefit Gojo in any way.

The blood-sucking idiot has to restrain himself half the time, his body feeling the overwhelming urge to drain. While he feeds, Suguru stirs and leans into the embrace, running his fingers through snow white hair. A warm smile pulls from his lips as he thinks of the times Satoru would hide his face, or be too embarassed to feed. Luckily, he could only go so long before he ran out of options and was forced to drink his blood.

After moving away from the Gojo clan and moving in with Suguru, it was hard to find ways to feed himself. The Gojo clan always had new sacrifices, and when they ran out they would just start feeding from their employed humans. Satoru only knew starvation in the Gojo clan. He couldn't bring himself to feed from innocent people. He can recall the pain, and how badly he wished for a death that would never come.

His body hates him for that. He's sure of it. But he can't help but feel anything short of blessed for the situation he's in now.

When he's finished, Satoru politely wipes off the blood from his neck and stares in awe as it pools. He takes a small lick before dressing his wound, causing Suguru to grunt in disgust.

The world stops for him when Suguru meets his eyes, a grin pulled taut across his face. He looked ethereal in the morning light as the sun came down to set in the sky.

Suguru yawns, stretching his limbs before pulling Satoru close again- careful to avoid pulling him to his neck. He trusts Satoru with his life, but not his own self control.

"Mornin'." Gojo yawns, eyes barely open. He smiles lazily, dark blood dripping from his retracted fangs.

Suguru pushes him back by his chest, staring at him incredulously.

"Are you kidding? Go wash out your mouth, I don't wanna see that shit."

Satoru pouts, whining as always, "But Sugu, it's your blood. There's nothing nasty about it!"

He tries to reach around him, pull him back into his strong arms, but Suguru knows better by now.

"No, brush your teeth first. Fuckin' animal."

"Hey, that's totally unnecessary!"

Suguru raises a brow. "Only animals would have manners like yours."

The other man pouts deeper, brows furrowing contemplatively before giving it up.

He rolls over, pushing himself out of bed and makes his way toward the shared bathroom. He drags his slippers against the cold tile, only because it feels nice to wear the things Suguru gets for him. Even if he only bought it to keep Satoru's dirty feet off the bed after walking barefoot.

Well- he did forget a few key parts to his routine, but Suguru was there to keep him in check. The other part of the his routine is the cleanup- which he can't stand but he does it because Suguru asked so nicely. If he gets to drink his blood, it'll be on his terms. Not that there would need to be blood involved for Satoru to give him what he wants. He would always spoil his best friend.

His mind wanders to other pleasant Suguru thoughts while he brushes his teeth. Warm arms wrap loosely around his waist, pulling him out of his dream-like state. His radiant smell alerted him before his touch did.

Suguru rests a sleepy head on Satoru's shoulder, leaning into his back. " 'M so cold. You should quit feeding from me so early in the winter."

Gojo gasps loud, pausing his brushing and turning his head to see him. "You mean... you want me to skip breakfast?"

Suguru grimaces and shakes his head, pulling away to lean against the doorframe.

"You don't need a full meal in the morning. It's just convenient for you."

And it's true. Having a full breakfast means he'll be full of energy throughout the day while Suguru recovers from his blood defeciency. Even with the iron supplements, he didn't seem to be getting much better with that.

Suguru grabs the small blanket at the edge of their bed and wraps it around himself. "You could just feed from the bag for a while, right?"

Gojo has to turn his whole body to face him, mouth agape as if he'd heard the most vile thing from his mouth.

"Dude. No."

He continues with his routine, putting away his toothbrush and walking around the room to pick up the remnants of bandages and bloody napkins.

"Don't 'dude no' me. It's my blood." Suguru crosses his arms. "I say you're getting too spoiled."

"Spoiled?" Satoru shouts, pausing his routine yet again. "It's my food! I need it to live!"

"You don't need a whole liter of blood a day, 'Toru."

Satoru huffs, continuing to clean his mess. "Oh, it's not a whole liter." He waves his hand dismissively. "Trust me I keep track. It's two."

All Suguru can do is stare at him, dumbfounded. Two whole liters?!

"Are you trying to kill me?"

"Not particularly, no. I don't think I'll ever find someone with blood as sweet as yours." He says, matter-of -factly.

His features darken noticibly, his hyperactive mind returning to thoughts of life without Suguru. It would come, when Suguru goes grey and his bones wither beneath him. Gojo would have nothing but distant memories to keep him alive.

But they were so far from that now. It didn't make sense to ruminate on something so depressing before it even reached that point.

Suguru sighs, fingers brushing against the bandage on his neck. He felt the lumps underneath, tender and sore. He's lucky Jujutsu High was so flexible with dress codes- he'd need to cover this up.

"Listen... we'll talk more about this when we get back. You need to get ready for work before I leave your ass here."

Gojo's eyes widen and he swears there are tears forming. "You wouldn't dare!"

Suguru chuckles, running into the bathroom before he does. "Watch me!"

a/n: this is my first posted fic but it was so much fun to write, i love my boys :PP

[just-sp-in-inginthevoid]

Kisaki & Izana's choice!: Watch closely to see how fucked Mikey can get on his own while simultaneously pushing him a bit to make his descent into madness faster - this, of course, sacrifices Mikey's mental stability as well as putting many people in great danger (you are not excluded although you can work to be less affected by it than others!) but you won't ever achieve your goals as quickly and efficiently if you don't!

Shinichiro & Sanzu's choice!: Can't risk it! Mikey means too much for you! Of course you want him to get better but if it includes any risk whatsoever you won't do it. You prefer taking care of a moving corpse than losing him because you tried to have him back completely. You enable every single one of his decisions, regardless of if they benefit anyone at all. As long as Mikey is breathing, it's okay, even if he changes completely. You're maintaining the status quo and lies to yourself thinking that's enough. No matter the cost.

Takemichi's choice!: You'll save him, no matter the risks and the losses. You'll make it work. He means the world to you - as does every of your loved ones. You cannot bear to leave anyone behind. No matter how long it'd take, no matter how much your blood have to be spilled and how many times you have to die, no matter how many times you have to watch your loved ones die and suffer, you'll make it work. You'll find the right end, the one where everyone is happy - including him. And that's okay, if you aren't there when it'd happen.

A choice: It's not like there's anything to do at this point. Maybe there is. But you don't have the strength anymore. Maybe that's a lie. You stopped knowing the answer to that a long time ago. You're tired. You prioritize yourself, and perhaps you hate yourself for it. But today you laughed and you watched as life happened around you, with bliss, acceptance and a numb pain in your chest. You hope he's happy too, wherever he may be. You wish your absence hurts as much as his.

[historia-vitae-magistras]

Hello, I have ceased functioning. You have actually ended me this time. Also I have done the thing where I pick out the best lines and it turns out to be huge swaths of the fic again.

“Be quick and be safe!” Matt tells them. It’s a benediction as hoarse as his prayers are when he thinks there is no one around to hear him. They’re just as futile, too. The time their slaughter brought them is at a standstill, and Matthew’s bullets are gone.

I just... the comparison of "be quick and be safe" to prayers, both in how Matt sounds and how much good it'll do, combined with the hard stop of "Matthew's bullets are gone", absolutely set the tone and tension in the most beautiful, terrifying way. I was instantly heartbroken for the three of them stuck in that hell, and on the edge of my seat.

But she’s ahead of him. It’s the way the world works. Zee sailed into a new day ahead of him on their spinning planet.

I love the way you include these little mentions of their geography! It makes sense for them to perceive themselves/others that way, and it's also absolutely gorgeous imagery.

“Look at me!” She said, this time harsh and sharp. “We do these things together, right? That’s what we said. My balance is your balance. You watch my back, I cover your arse.”

Sobbing I love these two. I couldn't grab everything because then I really would've grabbed most of the fic, but the constant drumbeat of "they belong together, they are the most important person, they're two halves of the same whole" - it's so good. So much of their existences is brutal and lonely and terrifying, but they have each other.

Arthur and Alfred are together, already half aware, and Father looks relieved, openly so. Not a good sign. Alfred looks bewildered. Less empire than boy startled out of bed. Because he still tends to sleep in one of those, even now. Because he is precious and held in reserve.

Okay, the juxtaposition of Jack recognizing that Arthur is relieved to see them vs. the resentment of Alfred having a bed, because he's precious and held back... perfect encapsulation of Arthur's shit parenting. He loves his kids, he does, but Alfred is the favorite and the rest suffer for it. (Also kind of shows the fundamental horrors of the "family." Sure, Alfred's the favorite, but Arthur loves them all and isn't happy that Matt, Jack, and Zee were/are out there - but the three of them are colonies. The purpose of their existence is to sacrifice lives and resources for Arthur's goals, how he feels about them as people won't save them. If Alfred wasn't an empire in his own right he might well be out there too, because being the favorite wouldn't save him from the facts of life as a colony.)

“Enough!” Arthur slammed his hands down on the map-laden table and tugged Zee away, shoving one arm between Alfred’s chest and Jack’s, curling so he was in front of her. But he couldn’t break the grip Alfred had on Jack’s collar. “Get your hands off your brother, boy!”

Without losing sight of the shit parenting, I do appreciate Arthur trying to shut Alfred down and defend Jack.

“I was here, watching his back while you were home turning a fucking profit! We were here when it was all for nothing! You only showed up for what? For what? To take credit? Aunt Bridgie always said you were brave, that you were brilliant. She forgot to mention what a bastard you are!"

GET HIM JACK. I know Alfred's worried about his brother, but Jack is damn right - he doesn't get to ride in 3 years late and then accuse Jack and Zee of being the ones who don't have Matt's back. (Arthur is an entirely other story.) And Brighid telling Jack about how great Alfred is gave me... a lot of feelings. I have not sorted through them all yet but it's a lot to do with that line you wrote (paraphrasing) - "It was my magic that protected you too. Remember that as you take my people and make them your own." Alfred and Jack have this connection through Brighid that feels really powerful but I can't figure out what I'm thinking about it.

“You shut your mouth. I’m not the one who just abandoned Mattie.”

“Ah, my dear boy, but you did that first.”

AND IT'S ARTHUR WITH THE STEEL CHAIR. I mean good lord. He's not wrong, and I'm not even mad at him because Alfred's being a dick, but Jesus Christ. I was yelling at my phone at that one. Arthur is absolutely not entitled to be making that argument, but I feel forced to admire the precision. I also can't tell if that's meant to be on Jack's side or if Arthur just couldn't resist making the jab. 10/10 bastardry, I hate him but am forced to admire the audacity.

“Want another first?” Alfred wasn’t facing them now. This was an argument older than both of them, conducted in shouts muffled from the other end of the house. “I took his head off his shoulders at Yorktown. I shot our dear lord father’s jaw from his fucking skull and his skull from his shoulders and the lobsterbacks surrendered. And then they left. And when the gutters overflowed, you were born.”

I fucking... okay, first, "an argument older than both of them" is so powerful, as is the image of Jack and Zee hearing this argument that's had such a huge impact on the empire - and thus their existence and how they're treated - from the other end of the house. Like, they know it happened/continues to reverberate, and it very much affects their lives, but they aren't allowed to be part of it or witness it, they just deal with knowing it's there and whatever the aftermath is. I'm reminded of the Cromwell fic, where I can simultaneously see kids experiencing a family thing and also colonies experiencing imperial policy.

Second, what the actual fuck Alfred. POS. I know he's upset about Matt, but that's such a fucking horrible thing to say. (Also, a not insignificant portion of your birth was from the "gutters overflowing", asshat.) I felt even worse than I already had for Jack and Zee right then.

“As flattered as your brother would be to see you defending what little of his honour he hasn’t left in a brothel, I rather think we should get to the task of finding him first, no? And perhaps, if you lot can manage more than one task at a time with the single wit I seem to have left you to inherit, we could perhaps even turn back what looks to be an entire German offensive that’s just caught us with our cocks out.” He paused and glanced at Zee. “Barring you, dear girl.”

Arthur, Matt's missing. Maybe refrain from calling him a whore until he's back.

I'm not going to call him just as responsible for the fight, but there must've been something he could've said other than "hey son, I know you're worried about your baby brother, but remember that you abandoned him during the event that's negatively defined our relationship for over a century." Like, he does not get to say that and then act like it's just the kids that are distracted from the tasks at hand here.

"caught us with our cocks out... barring you, dear girl" fucking killed me. You have such a knack for humor, both writing the jokes and knowing where to insert them/how to maintain the balance with the drama. It's so good.

“Excuse you,” A note of laughter in a gravelly voice, still half-ruined by gas. “I am Father’s best knife. Only the finest for when the Krauts come for dinner, eh Dad?”

Matt correcting Alfred from "favorite" to "best" is... I have feelings. On the one hand it's kind of Matt bragging ("I'm not the favorite, I'm the best"), but on the other hand there was the reference to Alfred being the favorite earlier so I'm simultaneously reading it as "I'm not the favorite, I'm the best." Also, this felt very cinematic - we're all focused on the argument, Matt's missing, how are we going to find him, and then bam! He joins the conversation without missing a beat. I love that kind of stuff.

Jack nearly elbowed Dad in the face as Arthur tried to look at a particularly large blood stain oozing from Matt’s shoulder but had to settle for turning his cheek and looking him in the eye a moment before he and Zee nearly got bowled over entirely by Alfred rocketing through. He practically picked Matt up.

Again, Arthur's parenting sucks but I do appreciate him immediately trying to get a look at Matt's injuries (and I wish Jack had actually elbowed him in the face.)

All of the talk/examples at the end of the fic about how the two sets are really similar was so wonderful in a heartbreaking way. They're separate pairs, they're only brought together by the external force of empire - but their dynamics are so similar, right down to the older carrying the younger around everywhere. Jack and Alfred are so similar, but that disconnect in experience and treatment is such a wall between them nonetheless.

I am tired and this fried my brain with feelings and thoughts, so I don't have anything particularly interesting to say - I just absolutely adored this fic and the way you handled all these dynamics. You're such a wonderful writer <3

Thank you 😭😭😭 I can't just 🥺 thank you.

[high-voltage-rat]

Okay so like. Obviously Karlach's most glaringly obvious theme is that of a woman who was betrayed, sold into slavery, and managed to escape. But her secondary theme, and the one that we actually confront and grapple with most during the course of her story, is that of her infernal engine. Spoilers below for all acts, including the ending of the game.

From the moment we meet her in Act 1, Karlach is dying. From the very earliest part of her character quest, she is told her engine cannot sustain her forever- she is living on borrowed time. Further, she is isolated from the world because of it- she can't hug her friends, can't take a lover, can't even interact with the world like the rest of her peers. She is constantly conscious of her body and the way that it is different- she has to be. She's told that if she returns to the state she was in before, even more isolated and fighting a constant war that she will never truly win, she can at least survive. When she refuses this option, when she expresses that it isn't an option at all, that she would rather have an enjoyable short time than a miserable long one, it is in many ways framed as her "giving up".

This, to me, speaks to the story of a terminal or chronic illness, or a disability. A life spent fighting your own body, restricted by your condition, desperately wanting to be like everyone else. Being unable to have physical contact or intimacy, whether because of the risk to your health, or simply because you can't even form the connections to get to that point in a relationship with someone because your experiences are so different or your condition takes up your time and mind. And if you decide to forego treatment, if you decide the benefits of it aren't worth the consequences, you're told you're giving up, pushed to keep fighting.

Now, in Act 2, with the help of Dammon, Karlach is able to upgrade her engine enough to be able to protect others from the consequences of her engine. She can hug people, she can have physical contact. She's full of joy, even as Dammon is reminding her that she's dying- because she's finally getting the chance to live again. She's finally done letting her condition dictate her life, and she throws herself into everything that means.

In Act 3, we see her experience ups and downs within that. We see the grief over her coming death suddenly hit her, we see her mourn herself, the life she could have had. We see her get angry, at the people who put her in this position, at the people around her who are living "normal" lives, even a little bit at herself. Even though she's accepted the path that will lead to her death, she's still grieving it.

At the culmination of her arc, we see her volunteer to become a mind flayer in order to save the world. She's dying anyway, she argues, may as well do it saving the world. It's not just a heroic offer of sacrifice- to her, it's the logical conclusion. It's pragmatic. It doesn't matter what form she dies in, it'll happen regardless.

Only... it doesn't. If she transforms, her engine stabilizes. More than that, she starts to feel even more like herself. She's hideous, in a form that is reveiled by society, her body permanently altered- people don't look at her and see Karlach. They see a mind flayer. Her friends offer her pity, her allies immediately take to referring to her as an illithid regardless of who she was before. And yet, she says, she feels more of herself than she ever has. She has a future, she has hope, she's happy.

I see this culmination as an allegory for the use of aids or the receipt of radical treatment. You can be the healthiest and happiest you've been in your whole life- but if you take medications, if you use mobility aids, if you have scars from a life-improving surgery, anything that makes it visible that you're embracing and working with your condition... that's when the sympathy starts pouring in. That's when you're viewed as a tragedy, or something gross and unfit for being seen in public. That's when people recoil and ask what happened to you, even when they never reacted at all when you were at your worst. People stop looking at you and seeing you, and start seeing your condition. Despite all of that, though, finding aids that fit your needs or getting the right procedure can revolutionize your life. It can set you free, and it can empower you to find joys you never knew were possible.

For Karlach's story, I honestly feel like becoming an Illithid is the best ending- because it does that for her. It's not a fuzzy warm perfect ending- but it sets her free. It gives her agency over her life again, and regardless of what anyone else sees when they look at her, she can be proud of what she's accomplished. Of the future ahead of her, of the person she's become, of all the parts of being Karlach she now gets to explore.

She never gets to live a "normal" life. But she gets to be happy. And she saves the goddamn world.

[malt-rants-and-stuff]

hey... hey psst. psst. kim dokja. i keep thinking about him because he really seems like the kind of guy i like. time loop guy with a dissociation metaphor thing going on??? and also a play on the self-insert trope?? that's all i REALLY know i think. i dunno how you feel about these kinds of questions but im curious to hear ur thoughts on him. i might never get into orv because the length of it alone requires a grindset of some sort even if you end up in the hyperfixation trenches i feel like, which is something i've been going through with MY game but like. it looks more intimidating when you're not already into it i think. in any case would u ever wanna talk about him...

KIM DOKJA OH MY GOD

you don't even know what you're doing to me rn. if anything I have Too Many thoughts about him it's actually insane.

idk what level of detail I should talk about him at since you said you aren't sure if you'll get into orv but like. ouuughhh kim dokja. need to study him in a controlled environment so bad.

okay but here's the thing about him. it's not really a time loop or at least that's not exactly the biggest part of the angst here though it is partially. especially its about yoo joonghyuk (protagonist) regressing every time he dies and one day kim dokja (reader(orv mc)) shows up and changes the timeline and makes things go better than they ever had but also he won't stop dying because he so desperately wants what he thinks is the Best Ending and that ending had yoo joonghyuk and everyone else happy and away from the apocolypse but that ending never included Him and it's so fucked.

yoo "you fool, if I regress will I meet you again?" joonghyuk and kim "it was a good story, wasn't it yoo joonghyuk?" mother fucking dokja. they need to be stopped. but then they can't just have me be insane over them because here comes han "this story is for that one reader" sooyoung who will do Anything to save kim dokja even when he won't let her and the THEMES oh they are delicious. yoohankim make me so sick it's crazy

the never ending cycle of sacrifice turned self-sacrifice, I was made for you I made you I was made for you, the truth of omniscient reader's viewpoint was that it was never going to end well no matter how desperately they wanted it to happen.

Kim dokja will never let himself be saved, yoo joonghyuk will never stop searching for him, han sooyoung will never stop trying to be his savior. Kim dokja doesn't see himself as worthy of their love he doesn't think he is necessary but when he's gone they just fall apart. Mr. International Terrorist and Ms. Interdimensional Mass Murderer. That one reader who they did all of this for. who they spent thousands of regressions, hundreds of years, unknowable numbers of timelines trying so hard to save. and even after all of that, after the pain and the memory wipes and the separations and the death and just. everything. it will never be enough. Because this is a story for that one reader and he will never stop reading. he will never come back to reality. Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint is a trap of yoohankim's own desperate making. their collective failure to save each other like they saved everyone else is actually astounding.

Kim dokja is everyone we are all kim dokja etc etc, on his deathbed (one of many) he once made the one that he loves most kill him and everyone had just spent multiple chapters fighting to figure out who it was and it was so clear all along that it was painful. the usage of reading skills to tell the story of orv is so cool, the way that you can feel the foreboding energy through every word leading up to it, i fall apart over this book istg. you can clearly tell I have no coherent thoughts on them from this lmao.

also the themes around suicide and healing and regression (haha) and forgiveness and unhealthy love that burrows into your skin and wraps tightly around your bones and death and life and also there is a scene where kim dokja litterally says "eat the dirt yoou joonghyuk." and yjh does and I felt like I needed to be put down like a dog because I was laughing so hard while also crying over literally everything else going on. there is a point where the novel subtly changes from first to third person to signify the effects of something and when I realized it I literally broke down sobbing but it's so amazing like this story really takes advantage of its medium to tell the story it wants to tell. the story for that one reader. also the fourth wall is a actual character in this and its literally amazing, sassy shit who calls kim dokja out on his bullshit while also helping him. they go to a library and I kid you not I have never felt so heartbroken over two characters in my life than I did when one of the children kdj took in as his own acknowledged that he had become a side character type at one point in the novel and that kdj didn't love him as much as the other kid bc he was right it was true he did get pushed off and no one said anything because that's just expected when these types of long books have a pretty decently sized main cast but like in context the usage of this trope only to use it for character writing later was just evil and wrecked me.

the real kim dokja was the diagnosis I got along the process of reading this damn novel

[fandom-blackhole]

No, ok its been almost 24 hrs since I watched episode 5 of The Last of Us and I really can't stop thinking about it. SPOILERS

Like can you imagine living in and growing up in a QZ that is notorious around the country for having some of the lowest of the low FEDRA soldiers, ones that are known to dish out harsh and cruel punishments, who rape and murder for little reason. Then you find a bit of hope in a man running a resistance, who's trying to make the QZ a better, safer place for the people, someone you find that you can look to, a good leader. But oh no, suddenly your younger brother, who already has a disability that limits him greatly in the world you live in, suddenly has leukemia and the only way you can get medicine that will help him is if you trade someone else's life for his own. Imagine having to grapple with that guilt, with having to make yourself decide between your only family left and a man you see as one of the few good ones left, and ultimately deciding to save your brother. And it works, your brother is safe, healed and no longer sick, but now you're hated by pretty much everybody. So when shit goes down and the resistance led by the man's sister takes over, you know you have to leave because once again, you're brother's life is in danger, so you do whatever you have too, including going into tunnels that are known to have infected and recruit a man you've never met but can tell is very dangerous just from what you've seen. And well things go well, you get through the tunnels without fighting any infected, you've heard your brother laugh and seen him have fun for the first time in who knows how long, things are looking up. But boom, everything goes to shit in a blink of an eye, a whole army shows up lead by the sister, you beg for her to let your brother go and she just sneers about kids dying everyday and that maybe he was meant to die. And welp, boom again, shit gets worse and he'll pretty much unleashes before your eyes and you watch as the infected start taking down everyone around you. But you do make it out, some how unscathed and you feel like the luckiest man on the planet, your brother is here, alive and happy, you get an offer to go to Wyoming with the man that you've teamed up with, everything feels like its gonna be okay for the first time since ever.....what you don't expect is the next morning to wake up to your brother trying to claw and bite at the girl you'd been traveling with, the girl he'd made friends with. You don't expect things to happen so fast and to act on instinct as you shoot your only family, your only reason to keep pushing for better. The kid you've raised and loved and cherished and fought to save time and time again in what felt like a constant uphill battle. You never expected this. You thought you were safe, that HE was safe. What was it all? Nothing? Every decision, every hard choice, every sacrifice for this to be the way he went.....

Idk, just as someone with 2 younger sisters that I played a big role in raising and trying to protect, I can relate to Henry....and I know that I too wouldn't be able to go on if that happened to me, especially if it was by my hand.....

[lovetransaction]

HAPPY WW MY DARLING!!

This week I wanna know what your favorite Sam/Dean song is and maybe a lil drabble if you're feeling very inspired

There's probably other ones that fit this question better in tone/genre (Estranged by Guns 'n' Roses, Walls by Tom Petty) but today I'm going Holly Cole's "Make it Go Away" because it's the soft private intimate part of their relationship where they have expectations of each other and that's fine, it's good, it's what they want because they're brothers and that comes before everything. They both go through periods where they feel like nothing's gonna get better and the other one is the most constant and beloved source of help.

Cause I’m not angry I’m not crying I’m just in over my head You could be the angel that stayed on my shoulder When all of the other angels left

/ / /

-- and nothing comes before Dean, not to Sam, even when Dean spends ages with his fingers digging into the sides of the sink staring at his face in the mirror like he can't focus his eyes long enough to recognize himself after what he's done, what's been done to him, what he needs to do. That burden on Dean's shoulders is heavy like when they'd been little and Dean carried both their backpacks for them after school, walking back to whatever motel they were in, Dad gone with the car so they were left hoofing. Because nothing comes before Sam, not to Dean, who knows they need to learn lessons and they'll have to make sacrifices but in the meantime his kid brother doesn't need to know all the truths, can stand to hang on to his feral younger sibling self-involvement a while longer because it includes Dean, doesn't it? The first name Sam learned to spell, even before his own, like that was all he'd need. The generous barometer of Dean's moods, climate control in little brother form, braving Dean's stormy weather. It's tasks and chores and jobs and things they do for each other, some grudging some not, some cheerful some not, some painful some not, because they love each other; and what is love if not fond tasks, performed unendingly?

[misssugarcat]

My Very First Time

Explicit! 🔞 Aesop Sharp x Reader – 4,8 k words

I clear my throat. "Professor Sharp? I have a question. But I don't wanna upset you or make you feel sad."

He looks up, his irritation quickly fading to curiosity. "Well, what is it? We're here to learn, so I'm not going to bite your head off for asking a question." He smiles, trying his best to look comforting.

I look at his Auror badge. Then I take a deep breath. "I'm graduating next year and am considering becoming an Auror. What was it like being an Auror? But … I don't want to cross the line with the question. I completely understand if you don't want to answer that."

His eyes soften. "It's an intense job. You have to be willing to take down some of the worst and most dangerous of witches and wizards. You see a lot of things you probably don't want to, including people that are important to you, dying. It's not an easy job, but if you're willing to make those sacrifices, it's also a very fulfilling job." He pauses, thinking about all of it. "I miss it every day."

I smile sadly. "I'm sorry you can't do what you want any more."

His smile falters a bit. "I can still teach students how to defend themselves from dark magic. Just because I can't hunt it any more doesn't mean I've lost my skills." His eyes brighten once again. "If you want, I can help you with defensive spells. I'd be more than happy to help out someone who wants to go into Auror work."

I smile. "Thank you."

He pushes his papers aside, making more room for me. "So, what spells do you know? Do you know protective charms, healing potions, disarming spells? What kinds of things have you learned?"

I tell him everything I know and have learned so far.

He listens intently to everything I tell him, making notes and watching how I uses these various spells and charms. "You seem to be very well-rounded so far. Is there any one field of study more difficult than the others for you? For example, do you struggle more with defensive charms than healing spells or anything like that?"

"I would say that I could learn more with healing spells. In my opinion, I'm good at defence and offense."

He nods. "So, you have a decent handle with the more standard defensive spells and most offensive spells, but you could use some work with healing, huh?" Once again, he pushes his papers aside. "Show me what you know when it comes to healing spells. I want you to focus. Make sure your wand motions are as precise as possible."

Like I was told, I'm as precise as possible and in showing him my healing spells. He watches intently, making sure that there were no little mistakes here and there. "Not bad. Your focus on precision here is definitely a good thing in the healing world. You seem to have a basic handle on every spell you showed me, so your next step for growth should be continuing to practice these spells until they're like second nature. And once they are second nature, you'll need to move on to more difficult and more powerful healing spells."

I frown. "Will I have problems with the teachers if I study them on my own?"

"If you're practicing spells on your own, I would hope your teachers would encourage you. If anyone tries to stop you while you're studying on your own, let me know and I will have a very stern word with them." He gave a bit of a laugh, trying to lighten the mood of his threat. He looks down at me seriously. "No student should feel like their personal growth is being hindered. That includes independent study."

"Well ... certain spells aren't taught here. And by that I don't mean the Unforgivable Curses." I return his gaze.

Professor Sharp nods understandingly. "Are you referring to curses such as the blood cursing? I'm assuming you're referring to those darker spells, which, if you're trying to go into Auror work, you'll inevitably have to learn about at some point … I don't recommend taking things into your own hands for such spells, but if you have a trustworthy person to study with, I could see the benefit. Especially for spells you would be attempting to learn anyway as an Auror. What spells are you referring to specifically?"

I list all the spells I can think of which aren't taught at Hogwarts.

He listens intently, and then smiles. "That's a good list. If you want, I'd be more than happy to do some extra practice and studying with you. I could help give you the pointers you'd need for both the dark spells you listed and also for the healing spells you mentioned earlier."

He looks into my eyes. "Would you be interested in something like that? I am willing to stay late to help you get a handle on these spells, and you can choose when and where we can study together."

"I don't want you to get in trouble because you'd teach me those spells ...", I say quietly.

He takes my hands. "Don't you worry. I want nothing more than to help someone who is so driven to learn. I'm in no way going to stop you from studying. Especially not if you have an interest in something like becoming an Auror. You'll need an understanding of dark spells, because it's the Auror's job to fight the dark side of magic." He pauses, letting the implication of what he just said sink in. "I promise that I will do everything in my power to help you."

"Thank you …" Then I spontaneously hug him out of gratitude.

Professor Sharp is surprised, but quickly wraps his arms around me for a gentle hug. "It's no problem. I'm always happy to help anyone who wants to learn and improve themselves." He smiles, giving a little laugh and ruffling my hair.

"I'm just a tiny little bit grateful that you're not an Auror any more. Then you wouldn't be here now." I say almost inaudibly into his jacket.

He looks at me, still smiling. After a moment of thinking, he seems to realize what I just said. "If I hadn't retired, I may not have become a teacher. I am grateful that I became a teacher as well. I'm grateful that I get the chance to help you learn to defend yourself and do the job that I wanted to for so long." He pauses before laughing. "In a weird way, I suppose I should be grateful that I'm not an Auror any more."

"I wish you have had different circumstances. You deserve it.” I mumble. We're still hugging.

Professor Sharp's arms tightens around me. "The universe has a funny way of giving you what you need. But not necessarily what you want. It took time to understand that, but this is where I need to be." He gave a small laugh, looking down into my eyes. "I may not have found what I originally thought I wanted. But now I'm here, teaching the next generation. The generation that will become some of the strongest witches and wizards in the world."

He pauses again, smiling down at me. "And I get to be a part of that. And that's all that matters to me." I can see a little tear in his eye.

I sniffle. "Please don't cry, otherwise I'll cry too."

Professor Sharp smiles and wipes away the tear, laughing a bit at the situation. "Sorry, I get a bit sentimental when I think about how amazing it is that you want to become an Auror. I'm just so touched that this is something you want to pursue." His voice grows slightly quieter, as his mind obviously drifts back to the past. "It brings back so many memories. And reminds me so much of ... someone. A very important person. That's all …" He wipes his eyes with the back of his hand.

I squeeze him even tighter and bury my face in the crook of his neck. "I am so sorry."

He puts his arms around me fully, holding me a little closer than before. "No, nothing for you to be sorry about. Just a few lingering memories coming up." He rubs my back. "I'm sorry for getting emotional. I promise I'm going to be okay. No crying." He chuckles, giving me a warm embrace.

"Too little too late ..." I laugh and cry at the same time.

"Yeah, you're right. I couldn't let such a talented and intelligent witch stay upset about anything." He squeezes me a little tighter, seemingly enjoying this moment. "Let it out. If a bit of crying can help you feel better about things, then I'm more than happy to comfort you through that." He gives a soft laugh again and continues to hug me, waiting for me to feel comfortable enough to let go.

After we're both done crying, we lie exhausted on the couch in his office. Aesop is staring up at the ceiling, breathing deeply. His eyes are closed, but in this moment, he feels peace. He smiles at the silence, for now, at least. We're still in an embrace. It just feels right.

"You okay?" He opens his eyes and looks down at me. "Was anything I said too much? It doesn't bother you that I can't hunt dark witches and wizards any more, does it?" He laughs a little at the question, looking back up and smiling at the ceiling as though talking to himself.

"I think it's good that I can't any more."

I look at him. "Why do you think that?"

Aesop pauses, thinking about his answer. "Because I was really good at hurting people. And some people probably deserved it, but it started to become fun. I'm not proud of some of the things I did and said when I was an Auror. I'm better than that. "And I think I'm lucky for that. It could be easy to go down a very dark path and forget that witches and wizards are people. I don't want to forget that. At least, not again."

"You're way better than that. You're a good person." I hug him.

He smiles. "Thank you. I really appreciate that. That means a lot coming from you." His smile turns into a chuckle and he shrugs. "Look at me. A former Auror with a heart of gold and the sweetest witch in the world in my arms. How did I get so lucky?"

I blush very hard at his compliment.

Aesop smirks at the blush. "Was it too much? Maybe I should've held back on the compliments. Don't want to go overboard and make you think I'm crazy, or something." He laughs again, giving me a little squeeze.

"I think so anyway." I laugh too and squeeze him back. "I'm just kidding."

He sighs, smiling. "You're adorable. Do you know that?" Aesop's grin grew a little wider in an attempt to see if he could make my face get even redder. "Your face is so red right now." He chuckles, continuing to hold me close.

I grumble and bury my face in his shirt because I'm actually blushing even more.

His smirk grew even wider, giving her a small kiss on the forehead. "Aw. There's a new shade of red. You're just too cute." He chuckles again, gently rubbing my back.

"You're just making it worse. I don't want to look like a Fwooper feather."

"I'll try to have a little mercy on you," he said with a laugh. "You really are adorable, though. I don't think I've ever seen such a shade of red on a human being before." He pauses, smiling. "You're beautiful, you know that?" One of his hands gently strokes my cheeks. "And so is the way you blush. It's really, really cute."

"That's no mercy." I grumble into his shirt again.

"Do you even want mercy, if it means that you'll stop looking so cute?" He chuckles, giving me another kiss on the forehead. "Because I'm enjoying the little show you're putting on right now."

I pull the blanket we're lying under over my head.

Aesop laughs a little, pulling the blanket back a little so that he can see my face. "Aw, come on. That just makes you look even cuter when you try to hide yourself under the covers. I want to see your adorable face."

I sigh. "Fine, if you insist ..." Then I have to grin.

Aesop smiles as I let the blanket down again. He has no idea how he got himself into this situation of cuddling with a beautiful witch, but damn he didn't want it to end. "I really do insist, because I want to see your face every chance I get." He laughs, still stroking my hair.

I close my eyes and enjoy his touch. My head is on his shoulder.

He looks down at me, noticing my eyes are closed, then he smiles and closes his as well. It is really peaceful in this moment. Aesop is so thankful for this. Not many people would understand our closeness in a situation like this. He enjoys the quietness and the peace. He keeps his arms wrapped around me, not willing to move. This. This moment is perfect.

I feel so comfortable in his arms. It feels like home.

Aesop smiles. That was exactly how he felt as well, which put a little smile on his face. We really did find something special, no doubt. The way we comfort one another was unlike anything he had experience in his life. It feels so right.

"You know, I haven't felt this sense of calm and peace in a long time. I really needed this, so thank you." He gives me another kiss on the forehead and squeezes me a little bit tighter.

I squeeze back and rest my head on his chest. I can hear his heartbeat.

Aesop closes his eyes and lets out a small sigh, feeling his body relax. He feels so calm, so relaxed. The rest of the world is completely out of his mind, and it makes him feel like he can take on anything right now.

His voice is quiet, so quiet that it is almost a whisper as he speaks. "I think you're the best thing that's ever happened to me." A warm smile forms on his face. "I'm lucky I found you."

My heart skips a beat. "I'm lucky you found me." I smile.

"You're the best, you know that?" Aesop can't help but smile at me. His heart is filled with so much love, it was almost hard to bear. "Just so amazing, and beautiful. And so incredibly smart ... I couldn't ask for someone better than you." He chuckles, continuing to stroke my hair. "I'll have to make sure you don't get too cocky after all these compliments, and not start believing it yourself." His voice is playful.

I have to laugh.

"Your laugh is one of the most incredible things I've ever heard." He smiles, continuing to run his hand through my hair, gently pulling me even closer as he speaks. "You're just a gift from the gods. If there is a heaven, I think meeting you is as close as I'll be able to get to it on this Earth."

I turn my head. We look into each other's eyes for a long time. His dark eyes are beautiful. They are so dark that they're almost black.

Aesop smiled at me as we lock eyes. "You know ... your eyes are really striking. So blue, so beautiful. Like the colour of the sky on a sunny day ..." His voice is soft, and he continues to stroke my hair. "It's like you're this little sun, and I'm just a planet that you pulled into your orbit."

I close my eyes and enjoy his touch once more.

Aesop sighs, feeling me move in his arms. "You're so cute. I love this. And you know, you said you enjoy cuddling ..." He pauses, smiling to himself. "Would you want to make it a regular thing? We could ... if you wanted to."

"That would be great ..." I smile at him.

Aesop feels his heart almost skip a beat. As I take his hand, he squeezes mine gently, a warm sense of hope and joy filling his heart. He leans in to give me a soft kiss.

I kiss him back. And then we lie arm and arm on the couch and kiss hard.

Aesop wraps his arms around me again, pulling me closer than before to kiss me back with every ounce of love and passion he has inside him. He can feel my hands move through his hair as I kiss him, causing him to get warm with the happiness and joy he felt in that moment.

His mind calms down. 'This is all I need. Being with her right now. Just this moment, I will remember forever.'

We kiss and kiss and kiss. We just can't stop. Aesop kisses me deeply and passionately. His tongue enters the kiss as well, matching his passion and desire. His fingers run through my hair again, and a soft moan escapes his lips.

His hands slide under my shirt as my hands slide across his chest. He feels the heat of my body on his. A heat that he had never felt from anyone before, and he likes it. His hands start to roam slowly at first, but that feeling of heat seems to drive him crazy. He feels my hands on his bare chest, a feeling that sends electricity down his back and through his body.

Suddenly I stop and look at him. "You ... do you know that I have no experience yet?"

Aesop pauses, pulling away from the kiss. He still holds me in his arms, though. His hands slowly come from under my shirt. "Is ... I mean ... you've never done this before?" His voice is soft and quiet.

Slowly, I shake my head.

Aesop takes a moment to consider. Then, he speaks slowly, taking his time to think his words through clearly. "Do you want to ... do you want your first time to be with me?" His voice is still quiet. "I don't want to push you or make you feel like I'm expecting anything. Just be honest with me, please."

I blush and nod. "I want it to be you ..."

His smile widens even more. As I nod, he feels joy, and so much relief. He wants so badly to be my first time, so badly to share this moment with me.

"Alright." Aesop looks down at me. "We can take all the time you want, okay? I don't want you to feel pressured into anything. But I want you more than anything else ... so we can go at whatever pace makes you comfortable. Do you understand?"

I nod again and blush even more. "I want you now …"

His heart races, his body feeling heated as he hears these words from my mouth. "Are ... are you sure?" His voice is quiet again. "You want me, right now, for your first time?"

"Yes ..." Then I kiss him with so much passion that he knows I want him now.

He kisses me back, his hands moving to hold me even closer. He can feel my passion, and it causes his heart to skip a beat. He feels a passion for me as well, so powerful that it made his hands move without any thought.

Aesop sighs and pulls back slightly, looking into my eyes. "You know ... you mean more to me than anything on this earth ..." He smiles, not waiting for an answer before he started to slowly take his shirt off. Then he unbuttons my blouse and takes off my skirt and his trousers. He watches me the whole time to make sure everything is okay. He watches me, moving slowly and carefully for this moment. He makes sure to respect me and go at my pace. My comfort is his first priority, always.

Once we're both undressed, he looks at me, still smiling. "You ... you look amazing." He gives me another kiss. "You are so beautiful."

" I have never been as sure of anything in my life as I am right now." I kiss him.

Aesop kisses me again, taking his time and not rushing. There is no pressure here. He wants to make this as memorable and comfortable for me as he can. He smiles against my lips when he realizes how sure I am, how confident and how calm. It makes him feel good knowing that I feel so secure in his arms. Then he says quietly: "I've never felt this good. I'm so happy this moment is with you. You mean the world to me."

We kiss again. He then carefully lays himself on top of me, taking my legs and placing them on his hips. His eyes are locked on mine as we kiss, our breaths slow and soft. He can't get enough of me, of this moment ... it was so powerful, he feels like his heart would stop. There is love and joy and peace in this moment ... he has never felt such strong emotions all at the same time.

He smiles against my lips, breaking the kiss for just a second. "I love you. I will always love you." Then he conquers me slowly and carefully.

The heat, the intimacy of the moment, the passion and love that is between us. It is intense in the best of ways, the emotions overflowing as our bodies join. He moves slowly at first, careful and slow ... he doesn't want to hurt me or make things awkward. His eyes are locked on mine, making sure I am okay. I always come first, my comfort is his utmost priority. "I love you so much", he whispered again. "So, so much."

I close my eyes and enjoy each of his slow movements. A small sigh escapes my lips.

His heart nearly skips a beat, a smile crossing his face. He couldn't have been happier about that. He moves slowly to make sure it was enjoyable for me, but his movements get faster as time goes on, slowly accelerating until we found a pace that was good for both of us. His hands hold my body close to his, making sure I feel safe and secure. "Are you okay?" He asked quietly. "Is this okay?"

I nod slowly. Then I look into his eyes, my gaze full of lust, pleasure and devotion.

"You look so magnificent. This is amazing." Aesop can't take his eye off of me, and he feels like the luckiest man in the world right now. He wouldn't have changed a thing about the way this night had played out. This moment is completely perfect.

I sigh again in pleasure. I never thought it would feel so amazing with him.

Feeling me sigh, he continues. He feels no need to rush. He's not nervous any more. He's confident, he's happy, and he knows I am too. Aesop keeps moving, slow but consistent. He makes sure I feel good.

He feels an incredible sense of pleasure and love, knowing that he is my first time, and he is happy he's the one to share this moment with me. He continues, his breath soft and slow, and his lips locked with mine. He will think about this moment for the rest of his life.

"You feel amazing." I kiss him again.

At these words, he lets out a small laugh. "Just ... feeling my body in ours feels like it was meant to be, you know what I mean?" He smiles. "Just thinking about it ... is incredible." His movements begin to pick up a little bit, slowly gaining a rhythm, still slow and careful, but faster than before. "You're amazing, babe", He whispers. "You're the most incredible person I've ever met."

His hands move to my hips, and he picks up the pace again, moving faster and faster now. He kisses me more passionately now. He can't get enough of my touch. My body on his is the most incredible thing in the world, and the way that we're kissing ... it made him melt a little inside. "You're perfect", he whispers. He is out of breath, but his voice is filled with love and devotion.

I moan lightly. He just feels so good. I bury my hands in his hair.

He moans in tandem, his lips feeling a little dry from all the kissing. His movements are speeding up again, and he was moving faster and faster with every touch of her body. His chest was tight and warm, a feeling that he would never want to forget. A feeling that he would want to remember for the rest of his life. My hands in his hair drive him insane, just like how my touch drives him absolutely crazy with passion.

I gasp his ear how good he feels. How amazing. How big. Then I have to groan out loud.

His eyes widens when he hears my words, his lips forming a smile against mine. He feels like a king amongst men. He feels so lucky and so happy that he is the one to share this moment with me. He loves me. Truly loves me. There is no one else for him but me.

His breathing gets heavy. He has never been this passionate before, never felt this strong of emotions. It was powerful and intense, and he loves every second of it.

"Faster ..." I gasp again.

His heart is pounding. Aesop feels as though everything, every bit of passion and every bit of love is flowing through his limbs and his body. It is almost like nothing else existed, and we're the only two in the world.

He doesn't think about it, and he picks up the pace one more time, moving quickly and passionately. His breathing is heavy, and he moans in pleasure against my shoulder. I am his, and he is mine.

"I ... I think ... I'm coming ..." I bite my lip and moan silently.

His heart races. My first time, and he wants it to be everything I have ever dreamed of. My words are enough for him to almost push him over the edge. "Are you ... right now?" He breathes heavily. "Are you coming?"

"Yes-" And then I climax. I wince violently and scream against his shoulder. It feels so much better than anything I've felt before. I can't describe it. I feel like exploding.

Her scream fills his head, the best sound he has ever heard and ever will hear. Her voice fills him with joy and love that he didn't believe could exist. This was a moment of pure bliss and sheer happiness. He can't help but smile, and his breathing picks up again at the sounds of her pleasure. It was so beautiful. For the first time tonight, the intensity of the moment got to him. He couldn't believe that she was his, that she wanted to be with him. It made him feel like the luckiest man alive.

She lies under him, panting. Her mind has gone blank. She tries to find any words but can't connect them. He looks down at her, his own mind having gone blank as he took in the view of her laying under him, panting softly. He couldn't help but smile at the view that was in front of him.

He knows he is looking at his future wife. He is looking at the future mother of his children. Her voice and her touch fill him with a sense of love and hope that he had never felt before.

"You're incredible ...", He whispers, kissing her forehead. "And you feel like everything." He smiles down at her, feeling her body against his. As their breathing grows steadier, he feels a sense of elation and immense joy wash over him.

He can't find the words to express all the emotions he is feeling, but he knows that it is true ... he loves her. He loves her, and he will always love her. She is so wonderful, so amazing, and so beautiful. He kisses her again, holding her closely. Everything is perfect right now, and nothing can ruin it. This is the best moment of his life. He will never forget this feeling.