Us Against the World
A/N: How easy is it to come back after a 4 month (unplanned) hiatus? Not easy. At all. Sorry for my absence darlings, a lot has been going on from moving to health issues to new jobs⊠Itâs been so hectic that I am willing to admit that this piece of garbage was also being worked on over the entire 4 months I hadnât posted. This was all I could conjure up, but I wanted to polish this off so I could move onto the next project, so I also apologize for how rushed this one kind of ends + it doesnât have the same lighthearted tone as the first 2 parts. Regardless I hope you enjoy reading (donât judge it too critically⊠Iâm begging.) Also I think when I pasted this it got rid of my italicized and bolded words -.- (i am serious about italics)
warnings: 18+, kinda mean!jealous!insecure!joel, cclg/ddlg [attitude] dynamic, punishment (but itâs really a reward ;]), angst, more panty kink, some useless scenes, chance of getting caught, a little sadness and a bit cheesy, lazily proofread so expect grammar issues + typos!, i donât wanna spoil so it ends there byeee (let me know if i missed any please!)
wc: 10k (will the length make up for how bad it is? no? ok >.<)
Read part 1 here, and part 2 here.
The bar was filled with laughter and short applause from people winning their games. It smelled slightly of stale alcohol and oak wood.
You had just walked in with Joel behind you. As you were taking in your surroundings, Joel had already seen a guy or two look you up and down. He chose not to say anything. They werenât worth the trouble.
You both sat at the bar and ordered two beers though you werenât necessarily trying to getting drunk tonight. You just wanted to keep your promise of making him jealous.
He didnât think youâd actually go through with it, but when he saw your eyes go from your fresh drink to scanning the men around the bar he knew he was in for a real treat.
âYouâre serious âbout this?â He rhetorically asked.
You only gave him part of a smile and a shrug to say and what if I am?
He half rolled his eyes and sipped his beer, immediately grimacing at its subpar taste.
âFine. Do whateeeeever you want, little girl. Just like you always do,â he said. âGonâ and dance for other guys. I donât give a damn.â
You glared at him when he called you a little girl, keening a dark chuckle from him. He was poking the bear inside you, waiting for the moment you would choose to give up on your cunning idea.
You stood up out of spite and slowly walked over to a man roughly your age, clad in some lousy outfit that somehow made him stand out to you.
The teasing smirk Joel was wearing replaced itself with a scowl. You swore you felt him shooting daggers into your back as you whispered in the younger manâs ear.
âWanna dance?â
The boy looked at you with excitement and surprise, bashfully nodding and following you when you pulled him next to the other dancing couples.
You pressed your back into his and looked everywhere except for where Joel was sitting, swaying your hips in sync with your dance partner and occasionally pressing back into his crotch gently.
Joel stared long and hard at the boy who was just using the curve of your ass to jerk off, yet when his eyes wandered to you, all he could do was think about using you like that, only with fewer clothes on.
The song ended and Joel thought it would be the end of your shenanigans; he watched as you whispered in the young manâs ear again, and once you pulled away he motioned for his friend to come over.
Another young man approached the front of you, and you gave him a flirty smile as your arms linked around his neck.
Joel was gritting his teeth so hard he was sure he heard one crack. He wanted to keep his cool, not give you the satisfaction, but watching you dance for men that were your age when he was already insecure about being thirteen years older than you pissed him off.
He knew you were just having fun, but fucking hell.
He hated seeing those idiots practically fucking hump you in the middle of the bar. They were feral and inadequate compared to Joel who knew they could never take care of you the way you needed to be taken care of.
Joel had about enough when the boy in front of you began slipping his thumbs underneath your baby tee and saw how it made you tense up so he reached in his wallet for cash to pay for the drinks. Then, he stomped over you and grabbed your arm, snatching your body from between the two men.
âFuckinâ idiots,â Joel growled at them before pulling you behind him. He felt you resisting his grip after entering the parking lot so he grabbed your hips and picked you up. He sat you in the passenger seat then got in himself, driving back home without saying a word.
You knew you were in for it.
Once you two made it to his place you were trying to get Joel to speak to you. He just gave you a hard look and tossed you over his shoulder without further resistance; he carried you to his bedroom, sat down, and forced you to bend over in his lap.
âIâm sorry, Joâow!â
He had landed a firm slap across the back of your thigh and then broke the zipper on your shorts from yanking them down. Your hips ached from the waistband digging into your bones. You tried wiggling from his grasp causing him to grab a fistful of your hair and yank it back.
He smoothed a hand over the peaks of your ass for a few seconds, not wanting to hurt his precious girl.
But then he remembered how you left him without a care in the world just to spite him.
He gave you another spank that burned furiously against your flesh and forced a cry out of your throat.
âIâll never do it again,â you pleaded, âI swear! Joelââ
Another smack.
âFuckinâ damn right, you wonât,â he grunted, watching your ass color red. âYou wanna fuck some dumb college boy, huh?â
You whimpered and waved your feet around desperately.
Smack! âAnswer me when I ask you a question. Do you wanna fuck people your own fucking age?â
You shook your head frighteningly fast, waving your feet around more as if it would get him to release your hair but his grip only tightened. âNo, Joel! I only want youâjust you. Please, Joel, Iâm sorry.â
He tugged at your panties, not too harshly, just gently enough to create a wedge between your cheeks. You were thankful he didnât notice your eyes roll back and the soft moan that left you from the friction against your throbbing clit and asshole.
âMy olâ ass not enough for you? Sâthat it?â He whispered in your ear.
âOf course notââ
He popped you again from your words before pulling your panties up again, hating how you said it like it should have been obvious.
He watched you grind into the taut cloth, humping his knee. Although it was a subconscious movement from your body it didnât stop him from letting out a humorous laugh.
âSo fucking needy, ainât ya?â He cooed, releasing the fabric and trailing a thick finger down the wet spot in your panties. âMâover here punishinâ you and youâre fucking my leg.â
âMâsorry,â you mumbled.
âYou like it when I spank you?â He cooed in your ear; you nodded and he chuckled softly, tickling the hairs along your neck. âYeah?â
âI like it whenâ⊠When you pull my panties,â you bashfully admit. âFeels good.â
He slowly let your hair go and cradled your jaw softly to keep your head up. With a smirk, he toyed with the linings of your panties. âYou like when I hurt that pretty little ass aâyours?â
You hummed, taking one of his fingers in your mouth. He circled the pad of his middle finger around the rim of your clothed asshole, letting out a hum or a chuckle every time he felt it pulse.
âYouâre gonna be good from now on, girl?â
âYes, Joel,â you whispered against his fingers, spit drooling into his palm.
âGood,â he hummed softly, âgood.â
âCan you,â you paused, unsure of why you were still acting shy. âCan you please pull my panties again?â
He happily obliged, starting a little gentler this time. He watched the shadow of your face contort with pleasure while you moaned softly, grinding your clit into his knee some more.
He watched one of your swollen pussy lips escape from the constriction so he pulled them some more to make the other lip appear.
You moaned at the thin fabric being engulfed by your cunt, clenching so more of your juices oozed out.
You felt his finger gently slip beneath the fabric to rub your wet entrance. You exhaled at his long finger slipping inside of you, collecting your slick before sliding it up to your asshole to circle it briefly.
He removed his finger and snuggled your panties up more. The friction stung your skin deliciously. He landed a smack on your ass cheek with the noise piercing your ears; you yelped and flinched, seductively laughing afterward.
Joel noticed the outline of his hand appearing along your flesh, red and bruised. He kneaded it with his palm and told you to bend over the edge of his bed. Once you were on your stomach again you felt him pull your shorts off of you completely, then your panties. His hands warmed over your thighs, grazing your ass and touching your lower back. He pressed his thumbs in slightly to massage you there for a few seconds before he slid his hands back down again to spread your ass.
You held your lip between your teeth throughout his touches, not wanting to make any noises in case he wanted you quiet.
The cool arousal leaving your body dripped down to your clit almost making you flinch from the temperature difference. Your pussy was clenching around nothing, seeking his fingers or his tongue or his cock â anything. His laugh was taunting and raspy, seeing how desperate you were for him.
"Such a needy girl, hmm?" He took a deep breath leaning into your flesh; his tongue scooped up your juices from your clit to your ass in one long, heavy lick. You gasped, surprised by the sudden contact. You were left disappointed when he didnât continue lapping at you, but a rush of joy ran through you at the sound of his belt unbuckling behind you.
He heard your simpering little giggle, smiling at how cute it sounded but still popping your right ass cheek where you had begun to bruise. You hissed, chewing on your lip while he undressed from the waist down.
He teased his length along your slit, spreading your wetness upwards and slapping his fat tip roughly against the tight ring of muscle.
And it fucking hurt, more than you were expecting, but judging by Joelâs chuckle he already knew it would.
You understood his need to humiliate you. That was the whole reason for doing what you did. You wanted him to have his way with you just as you had a few nights ago.
But you hurt his feelings more than you expected to and much more than he would like to admit.
He slapped your puckering hole even harder to elicit a response from you, satisfied when you groaned his name.
âJoooel, that hurts.â
He lined up with your pussy, not quite touching you yet. His only response was, âGood,â before shoving his thick cock inside of you.
You screamed at him tearing your walls apart with cruelty, clenching furiously around him to try and adjust quicker.
But he wouldnât let you.
He pulled out of you to watch your muscles flex for a second, then rammed back inside of you; he stayed as deep as he could.
After ensuring your stomach would remain glued to the bed his lips pressed a wet kiss to the rim of your ear. He listened to your soft cries, feeling your hips wriggle beneath him.
âYou gonna be good for me?â He asked again.
You panted with annoyance and told him, âIf you fucking ease up on me.â
It was an absentminded comment with consequences youâd be dealing with for days. Joel just clicked his tongue at you and dug his hips into your flesh deeper. His cockhead nudged your cervix serving up a mixture of pain and pleasure throughout your stomach.
He didnât want to be too mean, however, so he pulled back and pushed his weight into your lower back from his palms. Your stomach being smooshed into the bed made the impacts of his thrusts feel deeper than they were.
Your precum enthusiastically coated his shaft, lubing your entrance as he rammed into you. Your voice was breathy as you spoke.
âJoelâth-that feels⊠That feels good.â Your eyelids hung low creating a blurry line of vision, head bobbing from his stuttering hips.
âYou like getting fucked like a slut?â He spat to which you confirmed. âSâthat why you act like one?â
You admitted your faults, not wanting him to ease up on you.
âYou wanna fucking dance on someone again?â
You didnât respond, too immersed in how good he was touching you.
He grunted, pulling out of you leaving strings of your precum mixed with his hanging; he flipped you around and wrapped a hand around the back of your neck, using his other hand to hold you at the base of your spine. He lifted you off of the bed, making you yelp.
Once he got into a comfortable position he removed his hand from your neck, showing you how strong he was being able to hold you up on his own. Your legs looped around his waist as he stood tall, your hands clinging to the broad peaks of his shoulders.
âLook at me,â he whispered; not wanting to be scolded again you lazily obliged. He laughed like a bully at your worn-out expression. âYouâre so pretty like this, already fucked out like you canât handle it.â
âToo much,â you complained against his lips in a short breath.
His hips snapped into yours, jolting your eyes wide open. âI donât care. You wanted to act like a slut, so youâre gonna have to get fucked like one.â
âJoelââ
He shut you up by shoving his free fingers into your mouth, while the nails of his other hand dug into your back.
He didnât want to hear your apologies anymore, or your complaints. He wanted you to shut up and take it, like a good fucking girl.
He saw the hindrance of innocence in your eyes that tried to beckon his forgiveness. He ignored it, meeting you with a punishing frown. The heavyweight stare riddled your nerves with anxiety â you didnât want to disappoint him again.
He ravaged your attitude, breaking you down until he got his way with you just like you had all this time.
âYou gonna be a good girl?â He asked again, shoving his fingers further back. You hummed into his hand and nodded, eyes as wide as saucers. He gasped when you twirled your tongue around his digits, slurping up the taste of his flesh. âYou like that?â
âMmhmmm.â
He experimented by pushing his fingers deeper, hitting the back of your throat; you gagged and coughed, but bit down on his knuckles so that he wouldnât take them out.
His thrusts slowed because he was too focused on feeling your throat, something that felt entirely different against his fingers versus his cock.
Seeking his approval, you took this as an opportunity to fuck yourself on him. With your shaky fingers pressing into his shoulder blades you lifted you rocked your hips up and down, clenching around his length often.
âLook atâcha⊠You need to cum baby?â His fingers left your mouth indicating he wanted a verbal response.
âYes, please,â you whimpered. âIâll be good for you.â
âYouâll be good?â
âYes. Fuckâyes. Iâll be so good for you, Joel. I promise. Iâll be a good girl for you.â
He moaned at your cunt gripping him, smiling at how you humped him. You couldnât hide your deprivation from him any longer, but he wanted you to earn it.
âPut your fingers in your mouth,â he instructed, smirking when you did so immediately. He gripped your ass with both of his wide hands to steady you. âYeah, there you go. Sâpretty like thisâŠâ
Your hair was glued to the sweat on your face and your eyes were low with a wave of tears waiting to spill onto your cheeks. Your teeth waned behind your red lips as you gurgled from choking on your saliva.
âYouâre so pretty for me, princess,â he cooed; despite the softness in his voice, his tone was still suggestive of his anger.
He was on the verge of forgiving you, but he still wasnât quite there yet.
Your arms and core were growing weaker the harder you worked your body on his, but you were so determined to cum â and to do it on his command.
âTell me how pretty you are,â he said with a devilish grin widening.
You were a little lost â what exactly did he want?
âHmm?â You hummed, unintentionally slowing down.
âTell me⊠How pretty you are,â he said again.
âUmâŠâ Your mind was blank, God, Joel could really fuck you stupid, couldnât he? âIâmâIâm so pretty,â you whispered.
You couldnât think of what to say.
Maybe if I compliment myself the way Joel doesâŠ
âYou like how pretty I am for you?â You asked. âAll fucked out from your cock?â
His eyes rolled shut as he let out an obscenely long groan.
He liked that, you thought.
âI look so pretty with your cock stretching me out, donât I? Hmm, yes, fuckâah! You make me so pretty when you let me fuck myself on you, Joelâgah! Do youâfuck. Do you wanna see how pretty I am when I cum like this?â
His eyes shot open at the proposal, the only words his mind was able to compute being, âYes, princess. Yes, yes, cum for meâmnh, God. You feel so fucking good.â
His words were encouraging enough to keep you going, long enough to light that fire that tickled you red.
âShow me how fuckinâ pretty you look when you cum for me, baby.â
Your ass stung from him squeezing where his punishment landed, adding fuel to your rising orgasm.
He saw it spread across your precious body: your eyes wavering between open and close, your mouth pouting with his name leaving your tight throat, your nipples peaking, goosebumps flaring across your entire body.
You were flushed red and heaving and Joel couldnât look away. You looked so ethereal, wrapping your fluttering pussy around the base of his dick and grinding in circular motions.
Pins and needles poked your arms from holding your weight, but the climax felt too good to let up so soon. You were sensitive, knotty, and engulfed in the stillness you were finally able to have.
âMy pretty girl,â Joel whispered sweetly.
You opened your lazy eyes, giving him a soft smile. âShow me how pretty you are when you cum,â you said against his lips.
He took a moment to catch his breath before propping his arms underneath your thighs one by one. Your body thanked you for the relief.
Your cunt squelched cum onto his balls while the air thickened with the aroma of sex and sweat.
So sleepy, you felt as he continued to drive his hips into you, but he was so handsome in the low light of the moon. You felt your soul tie to his own, blending your orgasm into admiration for the man.
This was anything but the casual agreement you two had come to weeks ago, but fuck was it well worth it. His jealousy was a sign of a weakness he only possessed when it came to you.
âIâm gonna cum,â he whispered with need. You wrapped your hands around his jawline and pressed his lips against yours.
The slip of your tongue against his was nasty. It was fucking filthy. You licked each other anywhere you could reach, coating one another in saliva as if to mark your territories.
Joel whimpered against your lips, admitting his arrival in the middle of the kiss. âIâm cumming. Iâm cumming. IââŠâ
His mouth parted as he brought you impossibly close to his body, and he felt a knee nearly give out from the intensity of his orgasm. He drifted his body to the floor so he could sit on his knees, not wanting to drop you.
His thrusts were small and deep as he continued ruining your sore walls with his ropes of cum.
Still entangled in a series of kisses, they simmered to a savory pace. You tasted each other and relished in the filthy mix of bodily fluids.
Youâd never been so sweaty from sex in your life yet it felt so fucking amazing.
He pumped you so full of cum that even with his cock plugging you a little bit of it managed to leak out. You both smiled at the feeling and broke away from each other's lips.
With your head tossed back on the edge of his bed and his head resting on your chest, you just sat there in silence.
His hands gloss over your back and your fingers stroking the wet curls on his head. You wanted to stay here forever, clinging to him like a bear to a tree.
He pressed a kiss onto your collarbone before raising his head to look at you.
âYou hungry?â He asked.
âMm-hmm,â you moaned shut-eyed, obviously very tired from sex. He grunted from standing up again and laid you in the cold bed before grabbing your panties and slipping them back up your legs. You finished it for him, making sure they were snug against your entrance to keep the cum from spilling out too much.
âIâll go get some takeout, princess.â
You hummed with a small smile at his new nickname for you, feeling him press a kiss to your temple before you fell into a deep slumber.
ïżŒ
âWhat are you doinâ?â Joel yawned as he entered the kitchen.
âI am making us eggs and only eggs because you have a poor selection of breakfast foods.â
He snickered, closing the space between you and wrapping his warm arms around your waist. âWell, thank you, princess,â he mumbled against the curve of your neck.
His fingers slipped beneath the shirt you borrowed from him and found the hem of your panties. You didnât allow his hands to distract you as you spread the fluffy eggs out over two plates.
âI guess thisâŠâ His fingers slipped inside of your partially wet cunt, curling just the way you like. ââŠis my breakfast.â
You shivered as goosebumps poked your skin from the motion of his hand, and you smirked to yourself when his other hand tugged at your panties. Once they hit the ground he bent you over slightly to pull his cock out, gliding it along your slit to tease you. You turned the stove off and gripped the counter, careful to not burn yourself.
Not even a moment later you felt his velvety cock smack against the peak of your ass, and you moaned at how warm he felt against your cold flesh.
âJoel,â you exhaled. âYouâre fucking ruining me.â
âYâsay it like itâs a bad thing,â he grunted whilst sliding inside of you.
You moaned, eyes closing softly. âNot at all.â
He rolled his hips slowly, careful not to break you any more than he did just the night before. His hot breath filled your ears with decadent compliments about how good you were for him and how much he wanted to show his appreciation.
Joel fought a moan every time he saw your eyelashes flutter shut and heard you sharply inhale between gritted teeth. His confession of admiration seemed to hold more weight than before. That knot inside of you gushes at his rasps of affection, pushing you toward the edge.
You focused on how he felt, every little thing he was doing: his left hand held you steady at your hip while his right stroked your hair calmly as if you were his new pet kitten. His hips curled into the shape of you as if his body was planting kisses anywhere you managed to still be bruised from his punishments. His thighs trembled against the back of your stiff legs, urging you to let go whenever you were ready, not quite rushing you.
His voice was staggering and cracking, the words I love you straining against his throat from him suffocating it with praises instead.
You knew all of the youâre doing so good fâmeâs and you sound so beautifulâs and you look so pretty with my cock inside of youâs were just invulnerably hidden I love youâs, but it didnât bother you.
You understood what he truly meant and thatâs all you needed for now.
His lovely teeth nibbled into the valley of your ear earning a giggle from you; you were so closeâso fucking close. You needed more.
You tried rubbing your swollen and throbbing clit yourself but it wasnât enough. Joelâs need to take care of you radiated from the heat of his body and you craved more of his touch; you moved his hand from your hip to your stiff bud, guiding his fingers to perform the way you sought.
His fingers were strong and thick and just what you needed to overflow, clawing at his bicep, leaning your head back to rest upon his shoulder.
It felt so good to be held by him. A longing that burrowed itself into your soul resurfaced. Ready to be fulfilled by him.
His words turned into simpering little mewls of yesâs and cum for meâs as you clenched around him.
He knew you were just barely there and he was adamant on not changing his pace or patterns if it meant he could watch you crumble.
Joelâs right hand left your hair and held your agape jaw to keep your head from bobbing too much after one of your legs buckled and your grip around his muscles tightened. He increased the force of his thrusts emphasizing the sound of his hips clapping against your heated skin.
His body was aching from the lack of rest but every moan you let out was so soft and subtle that it motivated him to continue.
Your breathing was shallow, filled with whimpers since he wouldnât ease up on your sore cunt, but you loved it. Your body craved the sin of secrecy that had Joelâs name written all over it.
All the sneaking around, lying, and pretending you two are nothing more than long-time neighbors made all of this worth it. The games. Chasing each other. Waiting daysâif not weeks just for a kiss was the thrill of it all.
Deep down you knew it couldnât last forever; itâd either have to come out or come to an end. But couldnât you live in the fantasy just for a little while,
moaning Joelâs name a little longer,
feeling the thick cum etched between your bodies,
feeling him stiffen up or jolt whenever your breath hit his sensitive ears,
laughing every time he accidentally slipped out,
getting so carried away that you couldnât hear anything elseâŠ
âŠLike the garage door opening.
âOh! Shit!â
You and Joel immediately pulled away, shocked by the sudden boom of Tommyâs voice; with trembling legs, you struggled your underwear back up while Joel tried to tuck in what refused to be hidden.
âSorry, guys, I didnâtâŠâ Tommyâs voice trailed off as he looked over and realized it was⊠You?
Wearing one of Joelâs big t-shirts and some rainbow-striped socks, Tommy said your name as if he couldnât believe it was you. If you didnât know any better youâd say he was kind of checking you out.
âJesus, Tommy. Quit lookinâ at her like that,â Joel complained while ushering Tommy into the next room.
âLike what?â
âLike sheâs a piece of meat.â Joel briefly looked back at you with those puppy eyes of his and asked if you were okay. You could only give him a tense nod in response.
You exhaled a breath you hadnât realized you were holding in before looking at the plate of now-cold eggs.
Embarrassed wasnât even the word. Distress curled around every crevice in the pit of your stomach making you feel nauseous.
You inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly, regaining enough composure to grab two forks from the utensils drawer and take them out to the living room where the two men sat and spoke.
âHere you go, Tommy,â you said sheepishly while trying to pretend that you werenât avoiding eye contact. Turning to Joel you said, âIâm gonna head home.â
âYou donât have to leave âcus Iâm here,â Tommy said, his apologetic tone emphasizing his indication. âI didnât mean to impose or nothinâ, it was⊠Just a surprise.â
âI gotta go shower and change my clothes anyways, so, uhâŠâ
âHere, Iâll go help you get your things. Iâll be right back Tommy,â Joel said. You both walked up to Joelâs cluttered room where he shut the door softly and then apologized. âI forgot we picked up a job for today,â he explained.
âWell, I have been told Iâm a pretty good distraction,â you teased, fumbling with last nightâs clothes. He chuckled and watched as you got dressed, asking himself how it got to this point. âI probably canât do anything until Sunday. My dad wants to take me to this new movie tomorrow, and then some event thingy Saturday.â
âSunday, thatâsâŠâ Joelâs voice trailed off while he pretended to think about something.
You scoffed and narrowed your eyes at him for a moment before hitting his arm with his t-shirt. He caught hold of it and used it to bring you closer, the grin of a jester playing on his face.
âIâm kiddinâ, princess. I know itâs your birthday,â he cooed against your lips. His kiss embraced your laughter and made him smile again, but this time much more humbly. âI got you a presentâbut if I give it tâya now Iâll be empty-handed in two days.â
You cocked an eyebrow up and stared at his lips causing him to vapidly blush. âYou wonât be empty-handed,â you whispered. You held his hand in yours and brought it next to your face.
âOh?â
âMmhmm, âcus Iâll make sure to keep bothâa your hands busy,â you teased.
He watched carefully as you brought his index finger to your drooling mouth and took it in slowly. You somewhat forced his finger down your throat pretending it was his cock. You choked on the thick digit and pouted at him with your eyes.
He gasped at the textures of your narrow throat, frowning in a way that let you youâve ignited something in him. He fought his moans harder than he ever needed to before, staring at you gag and slurp and slobber around his finger.
You curled your tongue against the webbing of his fingers and licked all of the excess spit up into your mouth with a swift bob of your head.
This made him bite his lip to shut himself up; you decided to not bully the poor man any longer and released his hand, smirking.
âYouâre gonna regret that Sunday, princess. Iâll tell you that right now,â he threatened, however, his tone was full of defeat and his voice sounded higher from the strain of silencing moans.
âWhat are ya gonna do about it, old man?â You teased before walking out of his room.
ïżŒ
Your birthday was more fun than you were expecting, more than enough people showed up (granted more than half of them were your dadâs friends), and you spent more time being the photographer than the center of attention.
Joel and Tommy showed up fashionably late (youâve chosen to believe Joelâs watch is set two hours back). Meanwhile, their arrival earned a few giggles and stares from your high school friends.
They tried to talk to you about how much hotter Joel and Tommy had gotten while you pretended not to feel the pang of jealousy in your chest whenever they gawked at Joel a little too long.
They asked if you two had hooked up since being back and the only lie you managed to conjure was, âJoelâs either always at work or with my dad, so⊠I havenât really been able to try.â
âWait, does your dad know you two used to hook up?â One of your friends, Bri asked.
Right now you were really regretting telling all those liesâŠ
âNo,â you said almost too enthusiastically, âand I plan on keepinâ it that way. Not worth the trouble.â
âWell, if Joelâs not worth the trouble to you then you wouldnât mind if I gave it a shot, would ya?â
You resisted rolling your eyes, wavering the drink in your hand around and mumbling, âGo ahead.â
âHey,â another friend said after tapping you on your extended arm, âthereâs plenty of fish in the sea. Joelâs just one guy.â She must have noticed the defeat in your eyes.
Maybe to you, you thought.
Before you could respond Bri was sitting back down at your patio table with an embarrassed pout on her face, and for some reason, you were surprised rather than happy (okay, you were a little happy).
âWhat happened?â You asked.
âHe said heâs seeing someone else,â she scoffed. âDo you know if he even likes blondes? Because I can always dye my hair darker.â
You chuckled, âI donât think he has a preference.â
The rest of them changed subjects so when your eyes went searching for Joel, you found him standing next to your dad at the grill where he was already looking at you wearing a smile. You smiled at him and then turned your focus back to your friends for the remainder of the afternoon.
Once your friends had left for the night and your dad ended up in a game of dice with his buddies, you realized you needed some time to decompress from all the socializing.
Your dad insisted on cleaning up for you the way you always did for him, so you made your way upstairs intending to lie down for a few minutes.
With your back facing the door as you flipped through a magazine Joel was able to sneak into your room; it was the lock clicking that scared you.
âJesus fucking Christ! Joel!â You gasped while throwing your magazine at him.
He chuckled hoarsely and leaned against the wall with the doorknob sticking into his back.
âCould at least make a little more noise when youâre following me!â
âThe more noise we make the quicker we get caught,â he spoke under his breath.
Your eyes were wide as you took the sight of him in; his skin was beautifully tanned from the Texas sun, his biceps straining against his almost too-small t-shirt, and his jeans hung a little lower than usual.
His glossy eyes lingered on yours as he watched you stand up and check him out. He saw the fear on your face morph into lust, increasing as you walked towards him.
âWhatâchu nervous for?â He teased after watching your hand fidget with your belly button ring.
You barely heard him, thoughts immersing into thoughts of all the things you wanted him to do to you. âHmm?â
Even as you got closer to him your eyes couldnât leave the imprints of his muscles effortlessly flexing against his shirt.
âYou play with your piercing every time you get nervous,â he told you after you pressed your body against his.
Ignoring his statement, you stared at the shadow of his collarbone and the light layer of hair coating his chest.
âLook at me,â he cooed, yet you only did it for a second, fueling that same attitude he had at the bar.
He tapped underneath your chin more roughly than you liked, almost like a smack.
But when you looked at his face again you saw that darkness you knew you wanted it like that night again, despite your attempts at hiding it.
Joel could always see past your bullshit.
âYou like when Iâm mean to you, girl?â He asked. You opened your mouth, ready to omit, but he held a warning finger up. âDonât. Do not lie to me.â
You swallowed the dryness in your mouth and batted your eyes at him before naively nodding your head. âYeah,â you said. âI didnât peg you for the mean type.â
His eyebrows raised in amusement, a sly smile tugging at his lips. âNo? But you like it?â
âI fucking love it,â you whispered against his wet lips.
You didnât need to decompress. You needed to unwind.
âI bet you did, rubbing that needy little pussy all over my leg when I was bruising you up all sweet and blue,â he bullied.
Your eyes fluttered shut as your breath left your body, remembering how good it felt for him to punish you. When you looked at him again you saw an egotistical smirk had plastered itself onto his face.
âProblem sâthat you didnât disobey me tonight, so how could I possibly punish you when you were being such a sweetheart? Sayinâ thank you after opening every one of your gifts and offerinâ to help out.â His tone was sadistic, tauntingâŠ
âWell, it is my birthdayâŠâ You said grinning. A heat burned through the pit of your stomach and spilled into your panties. ââŠand no oneâs given me my birthday spankings yet.â
He remained quiet opting to run his hands up your arms until they cradled your face, thumbs stroking your lips and cheeks.
âYou gonna count âem for me?â He whispered without breaking eye contact.
You smirked and kissed him tenderly. âYes, sir.â
He pointed at your bed where you went to bend over the edge for him.
His boots softly knocked against the hardwood floor as he paced behind you, pondering in his head how he wanted to proceed.
Despite the curiosity that made you want to turn around and ask him questions, you stayed still and quiet until he gave you your first instruction.
âTake your shorts off.â
You reached for the button and zipper before pushing the denim down until it met your knees on the floor. Your hips wiggling more than necessary.
âNo panties?â He said amusedly. You heard his body move behind you so that he became eye level with your ass. âYou mustâa really wanted that present from me tonight, huh?â
You nodded your head and reached under your stomach, using both hands to spread yourself for him. âIâve been touching myself all weekend thinking about it.â
Joel stifled a moan at the sight of the creamy precum that revealed itself between your swollen lips.
You flinched and yelped at the sudden feeling of his middle finger spreading your cum around your tight hole making him smile.
âRub your clit fâme, baby,â he rasped.
Licking your lips you rested your head down on the bed before listening to him; your ring and middle fingers rubbed perfect loops on your bud while your pinkie finger kept your cunt spread for his eyes.
He glanced at your ass which was still marked from his abuse nights prior.
âMy God, girl⊠These my bruises?â He asked wanting to hear your submission.
âNo one else Iâd let do this to me,â you breathed out.
His calloused hands gripped and massaged your butt for a few quiet moments until a firm smack landed on your left cheek.
His touch left your body as he anticipated a verbal response from you but it took too long for you to compose yourself.
You were just so fucking eager for his fingers to dance around your cunt that you made the mistake of forgetting the arrangement that occurred only two minutes prior.
âI donât hear you countinâ, girl,â he warned.
âShit,â you whispered, âsorryââ
He interrupted you with another smack, only this one landed on your spread lips.
âAh!â You yelped, quickly burying your face into your sheets. It stung ruthlessly. âOne⊠And twoâŠâ
You couldnât see it, but you felt the mean smirk on his face burning into the back of your skull. âTake too long tâanswer me again⊠You get the rest on that pretty little pussy aâyours. Understand?â
Your knees braced into the floor as you nodded. âYes, I understand, Joel.â
âMm,â he hummed grumpily. âGood.â
Smack.
âThree,â you hissed.
Smack.
âFourâŠâ
Smack!
The pain was starting to get to you in the best way possible.
You knew that for the next week anytime you would sit down on your bruised cheeks youâd remember how Joel took care of you in the way you wanted him to.
One spanking in exchange for one orgasm â thatâs how you saw it anyway. He wasnât into unnecessary punishment, but he went into this knowing heâd find a way to make it worth your while however you saw fit.
Joel only dominated you because you dominated him in every other aspect. When it came to sex he lived to serve you. So if 23 spankings is what you wanted, well then⊠What kind of man would he be to deny you of that?
By the end of the torture, you didnât even want to think about sitting down for the next two weeks.
Joel saw your reflection in the mirror hanging from your closet, watching those red and puffy lips curl into a beautiful smile.
âDunno how much longer we got, girl,â Joel grunted as he stood up. âBest make it quick.â
Your eyes softly close and you bite your lip, giggling and moaning at how his southern drawl sounded especially sexy tonight. He noticed how lazily you were acting and laughed.
âYou already fucked stupid?â He said with a small smile.
You turned onto your back, hissing at the pressure on your ass but giggling again at his annoyed tone and pursed lips. âHmm⊠Maybe.â
Joel opened his mouth to say something but you raised your feet to rub against the growing bulge in his worn jeans. He watched your bottom lip get stuck between your rows of teeth, shining a drunken smile at him.
âYou wanna play around, girl?â He flirted, a crooked show of his grin sending chills throughout your body.
âWanna feel you, deepâŠâ You let out a strained moan, cunt gripping so tight around nothing your precum slid out.
His fingers slid to the bulky strap of his belt and pulled it from his waist so fast it ended with a snap.
âSo pretty like thisâŠâ He whispered as he sprung his cock free from its restraints.
Your face warmed with blush and your nipples stiffened at the sight of his dick: so hard it only slightly curved to the right, with a red hot angry tip beaming with a thick droplet of precum.
He leveled with your body and slid into you slowly, not wanting to risk making you moan louder than the walls could handle.
âNeed you to be quiet for me, baby,â he whispered, âcan ya do that fâme?â
Your eyes were shut, lips still between your teeth as you hummed and mewled. You nodded, looping his curls around the webs of your fingers and legs around his soft waist.
A breathy grunt escaped his mouth. His breath hit just below your ear making your skin prickle with goosebumps.
As his hips softly crashed into yours you felt yourself tensing at the sound of people outside and downstairs. Youâd managed to forget your fatherâs friends were still here, and any one of them could walk upstairs to use the restroom only to hear the soft squeak of your bed frameâyour father could.
Joel was just so easy to get lost in. His scent, his pretty smile, his touch⊠The way his tongue lapped at your neck like a cat would milk. How his hands cradled your waist and thighs. When heâd move his head up just for a moment to look into your heavy eyes.
God, you were a fucking mess.
His cock slid effortlessly against your needy walls, pressing deeply into that perfect spot at an angle youâd never felt before. And fucking hell, you wanted to say his name shamelessly. Scream it and plaster it onto the fucking walls if you could.
You did everything in your power to keep quiet, struggling from how your bruised ass stung even more every time his body crashed into you.
Joel bit the meat on your shoulder to shut himself up. His body yearning to fill you up with his precious seed was almost distracting. Almost.
âDoinâ so good fâme, girl,â he whispered into your chest, the pace increasing. âMight need tâcum.â
âJoel,â you whined, not needing anything more. Your fingers tightened in his hair and your head was thrown back into the mess of your blankets.
The knot in your tummy twisted, curling tightly around itself. You let out too loud of a breath that turned into a moan, but nothing too incriminating.
âDo not make me have to pull out and stop, now,â he rasped before taking two fingers and shoving them into your desperately open mouth.
You choked at the surprise but settled down and bit at his knuckles.
His face pressed into one of your tits as another desperate attempt to keep quiet, but all he had to do was feel you cumming to finish himself. Joelâs cock was sensitive and overwhelmed, and despite his best efforts to keep going for the sake of satisfying you he just couldnât fucking take it.
You pouted and tried to pull him back in after he slipped from inside you to no avail.
âMâsorry, princess,â he huffed, annoyed with himself. âCanât handle you sometimes.â
You rolled your eyes but saw the disappointment on his face as he buckled his pants back up.
âJust sneak over tonight,â you flirted, âsuck me dry.â
He smirked at your coy smile and slid your bottoms back onto your hips. âIâll do what I can,â he promised.
âDonât leave me hanginâ, cowboy.â
ïżŒ
It had been about a week since your birthday, and Joel did indeed sneak over to give you your well-deserved orgasm, give or take three more.
And his real birthday present was a small Eiffel Tower; he had remembered how youâd always wanted to visit Paris. While he wasnât the most superstitious or spiritual man he said heâd hope it would bring you good luck with traveling for fashion.
Your dad on the other hand had been quite distant since that night and you wondered if he saw or maybe even heard something that gave your little secret away. Your dirty lies. Had they finally caught up to you?
Or were you just overthinking things? Maybe heâs just been moody or tired or in hermit mode. It could have been lots of things, right?
Needless to say, it was a shock when he called you downstairs as soon as you were done with your shower.
âHey Dad, whatâs up?â You asked as you entered the kitchen.
âYou tell me,â he grumbled, eyeing you as you sat down.
âUmmm, the apocalypse is happening and flesh-eating monsters are taking over,â you answered sarcastically. When his facial expression didnât even change in the slightest you stopped joking. âUh, IâŠdonât knowâŠâ
âWhose shirt is this?â
A dull brown and red flannel was tossed onto the island and you just knew your face gave you away.
âDadââ
âDonât lie to me either,â he said between gritted teeth.
Your father already knew it was Joelâs, you knew that. But he always gave you the opportunity to take accountability for your actions. Not like it made him less mad, it just softened the blow.
âWhere did you find it?â You asked, voice shaking.
âYesterday,â he said after some hesitation, âyou were at work for your last day. I was doinâ your laundry and there it was, as plain as day.â
You shut your eyes, a tear of embarrassment rolling down your cheek that you wiped away swiftly. âItâs Joelâs.â
âWhy is it here?â
You looked at him with eyes that begged for him to not ask, but his face was hardened.
âBecause Joel was here,â you reluctantly answered.
âWhen.â
âA⊠A few times.â
âWhy?!â
The tension was suffocating; you figured you were already caught so you may as well admit to everythingâwell, not everything if you could help it.
âBecause weâve been seeing each other,â you said softly, leaning your forehead onto your hand. âSince I got back, weâve been seeing each other. Sometimes I go there, sometimes he comes here.â
âSince you got back?â
You nodded and faced him again, fighting your tears. It wasnât that you were sad or worried about what your dad may have done, you just wished you were more honest from the start.
âYeah,â you answered. âI made the first move. I was trying to get over my boyfriend and⊠He was there⊠And it just sort of happened.â
âSâgood thing youâre going back to New York soon.â
Your heart sankâhad your dad forgotten when you said you were thinking of staying in Austin to stay close? Not just for Joel, but everybody. Your family, your friends, you wanted to be near when Sarah graduated. You missed life in Texas, too much to go back to New York State so soon.
âIâI told you I wanted to stay, that I was thinking of staying close,â you rambled, âdid you forget?â
âNo, I didnât forget. Youâre not allowed to see him anymore. You in New York makes sure that happens.â
âWhânot allowed?!â You almost laughed. âIâm twenty-five, I make my own decisions.â
âHeâs too old for you,â he said.
You scoffed, standing up. âIâm not some mentally incompetent eighteen-year-old, Dad. Iâm a grown woman dating a grown man!â
âNot here! Not when youâre living in my house.â
âWell, then I will just fucking move out!â
You ignored his protests and calls for you, feeling like a grounded teenager all over again.
What you and Joel had was fickle, you knew that. You werenât stupid. It wasnât built on a foundation, it was hardly dating even though you wanted it to be more.
Your dad would come around someday. Hell, maybe he would have already had you been honest from the start.
ïżŒ
âHey, Sarah, is your dad home?â You stiffly asked.
She frowned at your puffy eyes and red nose, looking over her shoulder before saying, âUh, nâno, but heâs just runninâ a bit late from work. Why donât you come in and wait for him? He should be back any minute.â
âNo, thatâs okay. I donât wanna impose. Just tell him to call me when he gets some free time, please?â
âYou sure?â
You nodded, not necessarily trusting your voice anymore with how you were choking up from your tears.
Sarahâs shoulders dropped and she insisted you come in. âCome on, itâs starting to rain.â
After a moment of hesitation, you followed her inside after picking your bag up, wiping your nose, and clearing your throat.
Sarah was kind enough to bring you a glass of water, setting it on the coffee table and sitting down a couple of cushions away.
âAre you breaking up with my dad or something?â She asked after a minute or two.
âWhat?â
âHe told me a couple days ago, but I already figured because I heard him talking to you on the phone a while ago. Something about missing you,â she explained.
âIâm sorry, Sarah, IâŠâ You sighed and looked at your hands. âI wish I was there to tell you.â
âNo, thatâs okay! I think itâs kinda cool. A little weird, but cool.â She assured. âBut are you? Breaking up with him, I mean.â
âNo, well at least I hope not,â you chuckled softly. âMy father isnât a very forgiving man.â
âHe just wants to protect you. My dad said thatâs just what fathers do. Iâm sure heâll come around someday.â
âThanks, Sarah.â
The lock clicks soon followed by the door creaking open; you and Sarah watch as Joel walks in with empty hands before he notices you sitting on his couch. A look of worry spread across his face.
âEverything alright?â He asked.
âYeah!â Sarah chirped while standing up. âShe just came by to see us.â Sarah walked into the kitchen to give you some privacy.
Joel sat next to you and gestured at the ground. âWhy do you have a bag?â
âOh, Iâm just going to stay with a friend for a few days,â you said.
He nodded reluctantly, sensing your nervousness. âYour dad find out?â
A wave of sadness took over you again, but you managed your tears away better this time. You only offered a nod, nails picking at a loose thread on your jeans.
âWhy donât you stay the night? I was gonna make steak for dinner.â
âIâI donât wanna⊠Impose.â
He chuckled. âWhat dâyou mean impose? Youâre my girlfriend.â
Letting out a surprised sound, you frowned and looked around the room incredulously while Joel just stared at you anxiously.
âGirlfriend?â
He shrugged, leaning his elbows onto his knees. âWell. You are my girlfriend, right?â
âYou never asked,â you laughed.
His eyes were a mix of amusement and surprise. âMy apologies, darlinâ. Forgive me for not having been gentleman enough.â He takes your hand earning a laugh from you. âWill you be my girlfriend?â
âYouâre so sappy,â you teased before giving him a peck on the cheek. âI would love to be your girlfriend.â
ïżŒ
âI dunno what Iâm gonâ do,â you said softly.
You and Joel had been in bed for a couple of hours just talking about everything, with Sarah sound asleep in her room; the three of you had watched one of Joelâs favorite movies and Sarah gave him a fixed watch.
You shifted up to rest on your elbow and looked down at him. âHow much longer you think heâll be mad?â
âI donât know, princess,â he said after sucking his teeth. âHe doesnât tend to hold grudges but I know heâs more mad at me. Fâitâs any consolation.â
You let out a weak chuckle and leaned down to kiss him. His hand cupped your jaw just firm enough to keep you still. Your lips tangled with his, fingers reaching up to clasp his curls; he climbed on top of you carefully, humming on the tip of your tongue.
He began to grind and hump eliciting moans from you both while his right hand got to work beneath your shirt, thumbing the nipple just enough to tickle you.
Your hand snaked between your bodies to find the opening of his boxers; you pulled his velvety cock out and pumped it gently whilst not bothering to touch yourself as your panties were already pooling.
Your heart ached with so much pain and at the same time so much love. You needed Joel. In every fucking way possible for as long as youâd be blessed to have him.
His lips broke free from yours to greet your neck, then your collarbone, before planting around your now exposed breast.
You exhaled at his warm tongue swirling saliva around your peaked bud, sending waves of shivers down your arching spine.
âJoel,â you whispered leaning into his gentle touch.
With a throbbing clit and a slippery cunt you felt weak beneath him. You were enamored with pleasure that it overtook your body. You couldnât control your breathing or your trembling. Hand awkwardly shifting around his shaft.
He took your other nipple into his hot mouth, shirt bunched around your arching neck. With daunting hands he traced the hem of your panties, pulling at them carefully.
He sat on his knees to undress your legs, adjusting so his cock lined up with your entrance. He slid in slowly, knowing the lack of foreplay could ruin this.
But it didnât.
Your walls burned with a stretch so delicious it set your skin on fire. It took everything in you to not moan as loudly as your body begged to.
A soft gasp only leaving your lips, your head lolling back, eyes clenching shut⊠Yeah. Joel knew how to fucking work you.
Your walls clung to him fearing even just a moment of loss. His eyes burned into your feverish skin, watching the rise and fall of your chest and stomach as you took in deep breaths.
âYou feel so good,â he whispered into your collarbone, placing a sloppy kiss on it afterward. âI loââ
A pause in his voice made your eyes fly open; his hips stuttered the same way his voice did signaling something was wrong.
Joelâs heart punched against yours, but he kept grinding into you like he hadnât spoken at all. Oh, but all the worry was written in his eyes.
âJoel?â You softly asked between moans.
He took in the softness of your hands cradling his uneven stubble. He hummed and kissed the meat of your palm before biting it gently.
You fought the nerves in your voice. Everything inside your body screamed that this was wrong, yet as you looked into his eyes your heart swelled with admiration for the man that helped you find pieces of yourself again.
âI love you too,â you finally said.
He stopped moving his body against yours and he just stared at you. He was conflicted with whether or not you said that only because he almost did.
But when you said it again and tightened your legs around his waist to affirm it he gave you a gentle kiss, finding his tongue bumping into yours along the way. Pulling back, Joel finished his sentence.
âI love you.â
âYou love me?â You teased.
But his face remained serious, eyes boring into yours.
After a few more silent seconds Joel laid his head into the curve of your neck and began riding into you again. Hips rolling into you, breath hitting your neck, and hands gripping the sheets.
Your body was hot as molten lava, melting into the mattress. Joel felt so safe, so beautifully safe. Safe enough to say, âI love you,â in his ear over and over again, his voice overlapping yours with the same words.
He took care of you that night. Letting you immerse yourself into enjoying every damn thing he gave you. His grunts staggered and turned into short hisses of pain as you bit into his shoulder to keep quiet. Thatâs what fueled him: the pain of your undying desire.
He reached deeper inside of you than he ever dared to before, reaching reaching reaching to find your soul and bear all commitment to it. To serve you, as his gravelly voice whispered, âI fucking live for you.â
âI love you, Joel,â you responded. âItâs you and me. Forever. Us against the world.â A tear made its way from your eye to his forehead.
He kissed the trail the tear left and repeated you. âUs against the world.â
It was just sex talk â usually is, but Joel always knew what words would just make you fucking cum. Those words dripped from his lips like a poisonous honey for you to lap up and savor.
He wanted you cumming all over his sheets cock to fucking mean something. To permeate his love anywhere it could stain.
Joel had started to cum just a second before you did, forcing him to let out a moan. You held his head to your chest while he cradled your back.
Your head buzzed the same way it would when you got high, only it felt better. Quieter. More immersive. Your back arched into his touch and the rolling of his hips kept you in that limbo. Not here nor there. You were right where you needed to be, whatever that fucking meant.
You managed to keep quiet a little better than him, giggling softly when he just plopped down onto you after you had both come down.
He stayed like that for a few minutes while you just stroked the curls by his ear, his other one listening to your heartbeat slow down.
âIâll get ya cleaned up,â he cooed, and just as he finished dressing his phone began to ring. He just answered it as he walked to the bathroom, letting you rest some more. A few minutes later, he came back and wiped wherever you asked. âI gotta go help Tommy real quick with somethinâ. Wâya stay here, keep an eye and ear out for Sarah?â He asked.
âYeah, for sure. Be safe.â
You shared a kiss with him again before looking at the alarm clock on his nightstand. Shit. 11:32 PM.
âJoel?â He looked back at you with a raised eyebrow. âHappy Birthday,â you said with a smile.
âThank you, princess.â
-
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the art of the rom-com | jjk
summary:Â FILM395, the art of the rom-com, was supposed to be an easy a with one of your favorite professors, but itâs not. itâs actually a sisyphean torture that comes in the form of fellow film student jeon jungkook, who has no problem responding to every one of your discussion posts about the consumerist ideals underlying every romance movie with his own paragraphs on the beauty of love like the hopeless romantic he is. and when the two of you find yourselves partnered up for your final project, which is to create a short film on rom-coms, jungkook decides to take it upon himself to show you what love is really like.
{enemies to lovers!au, college!au}
pairing: film major!jungkook x film major!reader (female)
genre: fluff, comedy, slight angst, this is literally a rom-com in fic form
word count: 33k
warnings: college alcohol consumption, discussion board posts, emotionally constipated characters, film major shenanigans, blonde jungkook whoâs also in a hip hop dance troupe, miscommunication, if you hate rom-coms do not read this fic
a/n:Â i am so so so excited to share this monster of a jungkook fic (tho letâs be real, 30k is pretty standard for me now ;-;) with you all! this is basically rom-com trash, but itâs my rom-com trash, and i hope you all enjoy!
on a sadder, less exciting note: after this fic i will be taking an extended writing hiatus until at least the beginning of may. my semester is picking up and i unfortunately just donât currently have any upcoming fics planned for you guys. i hope you understand!! maybe iâll do a couple of ask games here and there to see if anything piques my interest, but other than that please do not expect major works of writing for a while. love you all!
500 Days of Summer is a movie you all have probably seen before. That being said, I encourage you to respond to this discussion board from a film perspective as opposed to a viewerâs perspective. How did 500 Days of Summer alter the classic narrative of boy-meets-girl? Do you think it was a smart move, on the parts of Webb, Neustadter, and Weber, to do so? Why or why not?
Jeon Jungkook on February 12th at 9:53PM
I thought that the change in the boy-meets-girl narrative that had been popularized by rom-coms of the 1990s definitely contributed to his popularity and its attractiveness towards viewers in general. The film makes it clear that the story does not have a so-called happy ending, but despite that, it still brings into discussion the idea of love and soulmates and true connection. And thatâs important, because despite the filmâs not-so-happy ending, it makes it a point to emphasize that those things are real. That love is real. I thought it was an excellent move on the parts of the writers and director, because they both broke standards in terms of happy endings in rom-coms and they stayed true to the message at hand.Â
Y/N Y/L/N on February 12th at 10:29PM
I have to disagree with Jungkook. Itâs obvious the movie is not going to have a happy ending because Tom is so obsessed with the version of Summer he has created in his head that he doesnât even see who the real girl is anymore. It doesnât have a happy ending not because they werenât soulmates, or because their love wasnât right. They break up because what Tom wants and what Summer wants are fundamentally different, and Tom just canât accept the fact that Summer doesnât love him the way he wants her to. In a desperate quest to keep her, though, he manifests this version of her and replaces the actual Summer with it, ultimately destroying their relationship. How could viewers ever have faith that Tom would eventually get his happy ending if the only proof of his commitment to relationships they have is him manufacturing a different girl to fall in love with?
When you walk into class, Jeon Jungkook is already there.Â
He sits in the front row, the seat closest to the door in your puny little classroom, much too small for twenty-students to fit comfortably, let alone watch movies on the pull-down projector screen above the chalkboard. Youâre convinced heâs chosen that seat just so he can grin at you whenever you walk in the room, always later than him because apparently, he has nothing better to do with his time than show up to class early and smirk at you when you arrive.Â
As you shuffle past his seat towards your ownâsecond row, middle of the room, centered with the lecturerâs podiumâwith your usual scowl drawn neatly across your face, Jungkook says, overly bright and cheery, âGood morning, Y/N.â
The sound of his voice alone is enough to make your nose scrunch up in further disgust. âShut up,â you grumble back, stuffing yourself into your chair and pulling out your laptop. One row in front of you and five seats to the right, you see Jungkook chuckle.Â
Glowering, you open up your Notes document for the class and try to avoid staring at Jungkookâs side profile, the way heâs slouching lazily in his seat, and what looks to be a lengthy paragraph on his computer screen, a task that proves to be particularly difficult because he happens to sit in the exact spot you have to look in order to see your professor enter the room. What the hell is he even writing, anyway?
He straightens up the moment she does, cheerful as always as she smiles at everyone. âGood morning, everyone.â
The lot of you respond with halfhearted smiles and waves.Â
âI can just feel the enthusiasm radiating throughout the room,â she jokes, clenching her fists together in success. At least that gets a couple of you to laugh. âWhich is great, because before we get to anything today, weâre gonna talk about the final project.â
You smile to yourself, immediately pulling up the copy of the syllabus you had downloaded to your desktop, scrolling right down to where she had outlined information about the final project in big, bolded letters. There are a lot of reasons youâve taken this class, not the least of which is the fact that you have had Professor Pollack three times prior to this and sheâs loved you in every class, but the final project was definitely one of the major selling points.Â
Pollack pulls up a more detailed final project document on the projector as she steps out from behind the podium. âAs you guys know, your final project is a thirty-to-forty minute short film involving rom-coms. You guys have a lot of freedom, it can be a rom-com, it could be a documentary about rom-coms, anything. It just needs to involve the topic of rom-coms somehow. I know a lot of you have actor friends who would be more than happy to have a star-crossed lovers fling or whatever. Go wild. Just keep it PG-13, because I canât in good faith have nude bodies of your fellow college students on my screen.â
You snort to yourself. Makes you wonder how many times Pollack has seen sex scenes of college students on her screen before. Too many, probably.Â
Unintentionally, your eyes drift over to Jungkook. He seems to be working on that hefty paragraph of his, typing something you assume is completely unrelated to the topic at hand and is further proof that Jungkook just doesnât give a shit about anything involving this class. Whatever. You turn back to Pollack.Â
âGood projects not only capture the essence of what a rom-com is, but also put their own twist on the story and bring into question the topics we discuss in class, like truthfulness, realistic portrayals of love, and viewer interpretation,â she continues, and with every word you feel heart beat faster in excitement. âI know youâre all excellent filmmakers. Thatâs why youâve taken this class. But what I want you to do is get into the nitty-gritty of the makeup of a rom-com and distill it as much as possible. Weâll be watching them all in class during the last week. Yes, Celia?â
You all turn to look at Celia, who sits in the third row, second seat from the left. âThis is a partner project, right?âÂ
Well. Thatâs the one downside. As much as you know that cooperation is an important life skill, you would much rather prefer to produce the entire movie yourself. But you love Pollack and you already know youâre on track to get a good grade in this class, so whatever. Youâll deal.Â
As long as you can pick your teammate.Â
âYes,â Pollack affirms, âand with that excellent segue, I will now announce your partners.â
Shit.Â
Pollack pulls out a folded piece of paper from her back pocket, like she had just come up with the arrangements on the morning train ride to campus, and begins reading. Slowly, as she ticks off names one by one, everyone begins to turn around, locking eyes with their partners and exchanging guess-itâs-us-two-huh? smiles. Everyone exceptâ
âAnd lastly, Jungkook and Y/N.â
You freeze in place. You look up at your professor, eyes wide and shocked, because nobody knows better than her how much the two of you have been butting heads this entire semester. But when you meet her eyes and she smiles knowingly, shrugging her shoulders, you know youâre doomed. Hesitantly, almost like youâre scared to find out what happens when you do, you shift your gaze towards where Jungkook sits in the front right corner of the room. Only heâs not just sitting. Heâs turned a full one hundred-and-eighty degrees just so he can smirk at you from across the room, a glint in his eye.Â
Jungkook laughs at your cold-stone, shellshocked reaction. Like he knows how much youâll hate this, and you know how much heâll enjoy it.Â
From here, you actually have a pretty good view of his laptop screen, brightness turned all the way up because he apparently doesnât care who reads his screen. Or maybe he just likes showing off how much he writes so he can establish dominance over everyone else. Except you, of course. But when you look a little closer, you notice heâs got the class discussion board for the week up on his Chrome window, two paragraphs typed into the text box.Â
Right above is your response to his comment.Â
Is that what he was working on? His reply to your reply? Right now? He has the audacity to draft it right here, in front of you, where he knows you can see? He doesnât even care that youâre blatantly staring at it. In fact, he actually seems to be relishing in it.
Youâre so caught off guard by the contents of his computer screen that when you look back up at him on instinct, you catch a wink in your direction.Â
Your fists tighten by your side.Â
Class is rather uneventful after the whole partner fiasco, as Pollack transitions into your usual dose of a short lecture on the film and then a class discussion that goes absolutely nowhere because everyone is too concerned with the final project to care. Whatever you talk about, you will be hard pressed to know, because you spend the entire rest of the period scowling at the blank page of your Notes document as you try to formulate a way to convince Pollack to change your partner. Would she accept a dozen doughnuts as a bribe? A box is only ten dollars from Dunkinâ.
When Pollack finally shuts her laptop screen and begins her weekly goodbye spiel, you are the first one out of the room. Hastily, you stuff your laptop into your bag, zip it up as best as you can (which means that the tops of your water bottle and umbrella are sticking out, but who cares), and shuffle out the room right as Pollack is bidding you all farewell, just so you donât have to look at Jungkookâs stupid, smug little grin on the way out.Â
Faintly, you remember Pollack saying something about getting your partnerâs contact information so you can start working, but fuck that. Jungkook knows your name. He can find you. If you must spend the entire semester communicating through Instagram DMs, then so be it. Youâve communicated with men in worse ways. Like through LinkedIn.
Thereâs a small seating area half a flight down from where your puny little classroom is, a few tables and a bench that wraps around the wall, posters splayed out on the corkboard to the right, staples littering both the board and the floor it rests above. Nobody ever seems to use this, despite the innumerable posters advertising everything from dance troupe shows to financial literacy talks, which makes it the perfect place for you to brood and gather your thoughts. Itâs also in the direct opposite direction of the exit. So thatâs good.
Taking your anger out on your personal belongings (as opposed to that bitchass smirk on Jungkookâs face), you begin to shove your umbrella and water bottle into the pocket of your backpack, fighting to nestle them amongst your other worldly possessions, like your pencil case and what looks to be a small nest of receipts at the bottom of the back. No wonder itâs so clogged up down there.Â
If anything gives you a sense of control, itâs cleaning. One by one, you pluck out the receipts from your bag, nose scrunching up as you try to remember every purchase youâve made in the past three months. Plus, one of these receipts is from when you bought some dryer sheets from CVS, so that means the five inches of actual information are also accompanied by three feet of coupons that expired two weeks ago. Ugh, what a waste.Â
âDonât look so angry, youâll have to get used to seeing this face a lot.â
You look up from where youâve been inspecting an old receipt from a midnight McDonaldâs trip to find Jungkook standing in front of you, backpack hanging loosely on his bomber jacket-clad shoulder and that same stupid grin written all over his same stupid face.Â
âCan I help you?â You drawl. Great. Now Jungkook can add âsaw all her receiptsâ to the list of embarrassing things heâs caught you doing.Â
âCan I help you?â Jungkook fires back with a scoff, blonde hair bouncing as he jerks his head flippantly. âLooks like someone needs to take an Accounting class or something.â
âIâm just doing some spring cleaning,â you sneer. Itâs February. âWhat do you want?â
âWhat, no âHello, partnerâ? âSo excited to be working with you this semesterâ? Iâm hurt,â Jungkook says, placing a hand to his heart as he shakes his head disapprovingly. âI thought we had something good, Y/N. Isnât that why Pollack paired us up?â
Youâre pretty sure she just likes watching the world burn.Â
âDonât flatter yourself,â you chide, knowing that Jungkook already must get enough of a kick out of just seeing the annoyed look on your face.Â
âPlease, like I even need to. You think I donât notice the way you stare at me during class? I know you must like what you see,â Jungkook flirts, just to be extra irritating.Â
While heâs stroking his own ego, you tear off a piece of that CVS receipt, one of the expired coupons for Three Dollars Off Any Shampoo or Conditioner, and scribble your number on the back. The rest of the receipts you scoop up and dump in the trash can to your right before you zip up your backpack and hike it over your shoulder.Â
âHere,â you say gruffly, shoving the paper against his chest as you head towards the stairwell.Â
âHow forward of you, Y/N, you know you could have just askedââ
Pausing right before you turn the corner and head out the door, you turn back to look at Jungkook, already exhausted from having to interact with him for five minutes. âAnd when youâre done jerking yourself off,â you say pointedly, âtext me.â
You storm out the door.
[February 13th, 1:24PM]
Unknown Number: guess who ;)
You: Wow I have NO idea
You: Keanu Reeves?
Unknown Number: haha very funny
Unknown Number: itâs jungkook
You: Damn shame
You: You done jerking off yet
Maybe: Jungkook: what makes you think iâm not doing that right now ;)))
You: You donât have the coordination to text me and masturbate at the same time
You: What do you want
Jungkook: ouch, harsh
Jungkook: canât i just want to talk to my final project partner? :D
[February 13th, 2:17PM]
Jungkook: alright fine
Jungkook: just wanna see when you wanna meet up
You: Guess I donât have a choice do I
Jungkook: unless you wanna facetime
You: Is that an option?
Jungkook: how about friday at 3
Jungkook: in one of the greene gsrs
You: You think you can manage to reserve one of those?
Jungkook: watch me
[February 13th, 2:21PM]
Jungkook: [screenshot sent]
Jungkook: done
You: Do you want a gold star for all that hard work you just did? All that manual labor?
You: Fine. See you then.
Jungkook: miss you already <3
Y/N Y/L/N on February 12th at 10:29PM
I have to disagree with Jungkook. Itâs obvious the movie is not going to have a happy ending because Tom is so obsessed with the version of Summer he has created in his head that he doesnât even see who the real girl is anymore. It doesnât have a happy ending not because they werenât soulmates, or because their love wasnât right. They break up because what Tom wants and what Summer wants are fundamentally different, and Tom just canât accept the fact that Summer doesnât love him the way he wants her to. In a desperate quest to keep her, though, he manifests this version of her and replaces the actual Summer with it, ultimately destroying their relationship. How could viewers ever have faith that Tom would eventually get his happy ending if the only proof of his commitment to relationships they have is him manufacturing a different girl to fall in love with?
Jeon Jungkook on February 13th at 7:35PM.
You make a good point, Y/N, but I think you missed the whole point of the movie. Itâs not about their breakup or the not-so-happy ending or even Tomâs problems. Itâs about the journey they go on and what Tom learns in the process. If you watch the trailer then youâd go into the movie knowing they werenât gonna last. The results of whatever Tom and Summer do to contribute to their eventual breakup should not come as a surprise to the viewer. The whole point of the movie is that they spent five hundred days together and Tom is now recounting those days to anyone who will watch. And you know whoâs watching? People who want to hear a story. About love. And loss. And everything in between. Isnât that the whole reason we watch romance movies anyway?
Sometimes, you wonder if the garishness of Professor Pollackâs shoebox-sized office is the reason not very many students attend her office hours. The walls are lined with movie posters taken from a theater going out of business, the shelves stuffed to the brim with Disney World trinkets and old film memorabilia. Sheâs installed these thick red velvet curtains along her single window, making the whole room look like some sort of 1950s movie lair.Â
In a way, you suppose it kind of is.Â
You hear the taps of her Converse shoes as they come down the hallway and round the corner into the office.
âYou know, Y/N, I was surprised to see you signed up for my office hours when I logged in this morning,â Pollack says as she enters the room, handing you the coffee in her right hand as she takes a sip out of the one from her left. Last year, the film department bought a Breville coffee maker with the leftover funds from a movie showing fundraiser and it is, in your humble opinion, the best investment the department has ever made.
âWhy? I see you all the time,â you ask, eyebrows raised. You and Professor Pollack are not lacking in social connection. Sheâs written you a letter of recommendation and she knows your coffee order.Â
âThe very first time we ever spoke outside of class, you sat down at my Starbucks table while I was eating lunch just so you could introduce yourself and ask me about my opinion on the Mamma Mia remake,â she deadpans. âWe donât exactly speak through official forums.â
Well, sheâs got you there.Â
âI knowâŠâ you begin, trailing off awkwardly as you take a sip of your coffee. Itâs burning hot and scalds your tongue a little, but itâs nice. Itâs been cold recently. âBut I just thought we could talk⊠privately.â
Pollack rolls her eyes as she reclines in her chair, back hitting the padding of the chair with a thud. âGoodness, I wonder what youâre here to talk to me about.â
âOkay, please pardon my French, but what the freak, Professor?â You say, because the words have been sitting hot on your tongue ever since you walked into your office and you didnât think sending an email that looked like:
Dear Professor Pollack,
What the freak?????????
Cheers,
Y/N
would be very professional on your part.Â
Pollack lets out this honk of a laugh, loud and sudden, shaking her head fondly. âCome on, Y/N. You must have known I would have partnered the two of you up.â
âI was hoping youâd let us choose?â You emphasize.Â
âAnd miss out on what very well may be one of the best final projects of the class, produced by my two best students of the semester? Absolutely not,â she says, smiling knowingly at you.Â
Even her sudden reveal that you happen to be one her best students this semester isnât enough to soothe your worries and calm your anger. Youâre honored, but you have bigger problems. Problems that start with âJeonâ and end with âJungkookâ.Â
Pollack looks at your beaten-down expression and leans forward, placing her coffee cup on the wooden desk in front of her. âListen, Y/N. Youâre an excellent student and one of the most talented filmmakers Iâve seen in a long time. Your discussion posts are detailed, well-written, and thought-provoking. I know that the two of you will make a great project.â
You scoff. âWe canât agree on a single thing.â
âSometimes that happens in life, and you just have to deal with it,â Pollack says sagely.Â
âSo I canât change partners?â
âNot unless youâd like to fail the final,â Pollack comments, shrugging. How rude of her to say such a thing, not taking the option to change partners off the table entirely but making it so that if you do, youâll pretty much be shooting yourself in the foot. Or worse.Â
You narrow your eyes at her. âThatâs low.â
âThatâs life,â she corrects.Â
âUgh.â You get up out of your seat, taking angry sips of your coffee as you desperately try to think of another way to get out of it. Are doughnuts still an option?
âI have full faith that the both of you will come up with an excellent project,â Pollack says like itâs some sort of consolation as she walks you to the door to her office. Yeah, right. You and Jungkook spend your free time making snide responses to each otherâs discussion posts like itâs nobodyâs business. Youâre probably the only two people at your entire university that care enough to make replies to each otherâs replies. Like Tinder from hell. âYou shouldnât be worried, Y/N.â
âIâm not worried,â you say, completely worried. âI justâI donât know how Jungkook and I will get along.â
Pollack grins to herself. Does she know something you donât? Is she up to something? She looks at you as you linger in the doorway, feeling utterly helpless after a meeting that accomplished absolutely nothing, and she smiles.Â
âYouâll find a way.âÂ
Reserving a group study room in the Greene Library and Collection should not be some gymnastics act that involves a warm-up, practice, a routine, and song and dance. In theory, all you have to do is log onto the libraryâs homepage, navigate to the reservations tab, enter your name and ID number, pick a date and time, and profit.Â
Of course, the demand for the study rooms does tend to outweigh the supply. There are over ten thousand students at your university. And only twenty rooms.Â
And still, you have the unfortunate luck of being stuck in one of them for an hour and a half with none other than Jeon Jungkook.Â
You see him coming into the library at 3PM sharp through the opposite entrance, a little surprised he didnât show up ten minutes early like he does in class, just so he would have an excuse to complain about having to wait for you. Feeling a little threatened, you pick up the pace so that you can meet his lengthy stride, keeping an eye on his direction so you know which room heâs aiming for.
You arrive at Greene GSR #18 at the exact same time.
âSo nice to see you,â Jungkook says, too cheerful, as you reach out to open the door.Â
âMmm,â you mumble in response as you enter the room, flinging your backpack onto the floor by your chair with a thud as you take a seat. The faster you start, the faster you can get this over with.
Jungkook, not at all outwardly discouraged by your clear disdain for him, rallies on happily. âSo, what were you thinking for the project?â But he doesnât even let you open your mouth to answer before he says, âOh, wait, let me guess: a social commentary on the consumerist ideals that underline every modern movie and encourage the pursuit of an empty dream by abandoning concrete career and personal goals in favor of romantic fulfillment.â
You scowl at him, even though thatâs exactly what you were thinking of doing. Youâre almost positive Pollackâs had enough of seeing college students try to engineer the craziest fake dating scenarios they can imagine just for a class project. Why not do something outside of the box?Â
âWell, then what do you want to do?â You challenge, already bristling. Like Jungkook has a better idea.Â
âMaybe something that doesnât scream âkilljoyâ as much as you do,â Jungkook retorts easily. He opens his mouth to spit out something else but then rolls his eyes and shrugs, shaking his head. âForget it. I shouldnât have even asked.â
âDonât pin this on me,â you immediately rebuke, pointing at him. âYouâre the one who wants to make some sort of generic rom-com for our final project. Besides, Iâm pretty sure every idea you even think of will have been done already.â
âJust because something is cliche doesnât make it bad,â Jungkook says. âI swear, I donât think you understand what the word cliche even means. A cliche thing, by default, is something that lots of people like. Therefore, it is largely well-received by the general public.â
âOh, then that must mean that all rom-coms are deserving of a Peopleâs Choice Award then, right?â
Jungkook frowns, getting exasperated. You arenât much farther off. âI donât know why youâre being soâso resistant! You know that romantic comedies are supposed to be fun, right?âÂ
âTheyâre not that fun to me,â you comment snidely.Â
âThatâs because youâre a stick in the mud who takes everything way too seriously,â Jungkook replies like itâs some sort of known fact. âHave you ever even been in a relationship?â
âThatâs none of your business,â you tell him firmly. Who does he think he is, going around asking that sort of thing? Especially to you! Like you could care any less about what Jungkook thinks of your love life. Intrusive, much? âBesides, you asking that is exactly my point. Not everything has to be about finding love and searching for your soulmate or whatever bullshit like that. Some people donât really care that much.â
âYou act like wanting to find love and wanting to be successful are mutually exclusive,â Jungkook points out. âYou donât have to abandon all of your life goals just to find love, you know. It doesnât have to be the most important thing in your life for you to even care about it a little. Itâs natural for people to want love.â
âThen I guess Iâm just a robot.â
âYou sure are acting like one,â Jungkook comments easily. âWhat, are you about to ask me to pick out all of the pictures with traffic lights?â
âIâm allowed to have my own views on love, just like you,â you say. Isnât that the whole point of your discussion boards? A forum where you can discuss these sorts of things through an academic lens? A barrier that keeps the two of you from going at each otherâs throats when youâre engaging in the class material? It doesnât take a genius, or even half of one, to know that you and Jungkook canât seem to agree on anything in your FILM395 class.Â
Jungkook scoffs. âWhat do you mean, âyour own views on loveâ? As far as Iâm aware, your view on love is that you donât have one! What do you even think love really is?â
You frown at him. âDoes it matter?â
âYes,â Jungkook says like itâs obvious. âThis project is about filming a short romantic comedy, about people falling in love with each other. How do you expect me to do that if we donât reach a mutual agreement on what love is?â
You scoff. âThere is no way in hell I am going to agree with you on anything concerning love.â Jeon Jungkook still thinks love is all rainbows and sunshine. Cries at the end of Love, Actually even though heâs seen it five times already. Believes in soulmates. Believes there are people out there that were built for each other. He flutters from one person to the next like a butterfly, even though heâs more like a moth drawn to any open flame within a five-mile radius. Heâs convinced heâll find his true love here, in college, just like his parents found each other.Â
Yeah, right.
âThen what are we supposed to do, huh?â He says with an eyebrow raised. âWe have a month to make a movie thatâs fifty percent of our grade.â
âThe social commentary is still on the table,â you point out. Sure, itâs not at all a romantic comedy, but itâs about them, which Pollack said was totally fine. Besides, she has been teaching you the entire semester, hasnât she? She should know by now not to expect some cushy lovey-dovey story about two people who were destined to be with each other and can overcome all obstacles with their love.Â
Deep down, a part of you wonders if thatâs why she paired you up with Jungkook. If sheâs had enough of the sappy love stories that Jungkook probably wanted to do, didnât want to see another cynical commentary on capitalism in Hollywood.
âWow, what a thrilling idea,â Jungkook deadpans. âPlease, tell me more.â His voice is lifeless.Â
âOh, shut up. Itâs not like your idea would be any better. Who would we even get to star in a rom-com we filmed? Itâs not like the two of us could do it.â
You regret the words the instant they come out of your mouth. In horror, you watch as they sink into Jungkookâs brain, etching themselves into his mind as a lightbulb turns on, a bright idea popping into his thoughts.Â
He opens his mouth, but you get there first. âNo. Whatever youâre thinking, absolutely not. I am not starring in a rom-com with you.â
That is something you can say with one-hundred percent confidence. Something that you know will never change.Â
âJust hear me out,â Jungkook pleads, looking a little desperate as he wrings his hands together, aching to spill the bubbling plan thatâs been stewing in his head.Â
You narrow your eyes in suspicion but lean back into your chair, a silent signal for him to continue. Itâs not as if you have any better idea.sÂ
âOkay. Itâs not a rom-com. Itâs a mockumentary,â he says, something that (and you canât believe youâre saying this) actually piques your interest. Moreso than anything else heâs ever said to you. âYou think love is totally manufactured, right? That Hollywood creates the illusion of it to sell to people paying twenty dollars for a movie ticket?â
âYes.â
âThen letâs do that. Letâs prove itâs manufactured.â
âAnd how do you plan on doing that?â Itâs not like you can walk into a factory and ask them to make the âloveâ emotion for you.Â
âWeâll be the stars.â
He says it like itâs the most obvious thing in the world. Like itâs your best idea by a long shot, the home run of all home runs, your golden ticket to an A.
You scrunch up your nose, hesitant. âWait, I donât knowââ
âItâs perfect!â Jungkook exclaims, eyes wide with excitement. âThink about it. Itâll be a mockumentary of a stereotypical rom-com. Except it wonât be this big Hollywood production, itâll be real life. And it wonât be between two paid actors with years of experience under their belt, itâll be us.â His eyes are practically bulging out of his head, big brown eyes glinting with excitement.
âSo what are we gonna do? Act out our own rom-com in an attempt to see if either one of us will fall in love with the other?â You say, an eyebrow raised.Â
Jungkook shakes his head. âNot necessarily. Itâs a mockumentary, right? So itâs grounded in real life even if it is based upon the stereotypical boy-meets-girl rom-com. It wonât be super scripted or anything. Think of it more like⊠a chronicle.â
You scoff. âOf what?â
âOf us,â Jungkook says easily. âOf the time we have to spend together to film this damn project anyway. I say that rom-coms are emblematic of the natural human desire for love, and that deep down love is the thing that makes us happy. You say that rom-coms are consumerist propaganda, or whatever it is you think they areââ
âThey are, and you canât change my mind about that,â you interrupt, just for clarity. Canât have Jungkook thinking heâs going to somehow convince you otherwise.
ââso, with this project, letâs see which one of us is right. If the time we have to spend together, making this mockumentary rom-com, will really change how we feel about each other, or if it wonât.â
How you feel about each other? You almost laugh when Jungkook says it out loud. Thereâs no room for questioning in your mind when it comes to how you two feel about each other. Two desperate-to-please students with opposite views on the entire structure of a class and three years of experience arguing your points in essays under your belts.Â
Jungkook believes in destiny, right? Then he must know that the two of you are destined to never get along.
âYou should be a car salesman,â you joke. Jungkookâs certainly excellent at pitches.
âSo, you in?â
You narrow your eyes, still a little wary of whatever it is Jungkookâs putting down. But itâs not like you have any better ideas. And the sooner you agree on something, the sooner you can get this goddamn project over with and never have to sit in class with Jeon Jungkook ever again.Â
âOnly because thisâll finally prove to you that not everything can be solved by finding love,â you say. Itâs about as good of a âyesâ as heâs going to get out of you.Â
Jungkook grins, mischievous as always. Thereâs certainly something else heâs plotting, you just arenât sure what. Maybe heâs in cahoots with Pollack. âOr,â he begins, lips curling upwards, âyouâll just fall in love with me.â
You scoff. âYeah, right.â
âWell, then I guess weâll just have to see, wonât we?â He holds out his hand, palm facing up as he waits for your response, that devilish glint that you hate twinkling in his eyes.Â
As if youâre going to fall in love with Jungkook. For this stupid project? No way. Just because itâs a filmmaking project doesnât make it any more bearable than your other assignments. Itâs a partner project. They are, by their very nature, excruciating. Youâll be surprised if you end this project and you arenât even more irritated with Jungkook. Does he really think youâll actually develop some sort of affection for him?
You take his hand on your own, palm pressed against his, and you eye him carefully. Just because Jungkookâs got something up his sleeve doesnât mean you donât. Finally, finally, Jungkook will see why love is stupid and manufactured and fake. Why it doesnât bring people together but instead tears them apart.Â
Maybe then heâll leave you and your discussion posts in peace.
You smile up at him.Â
âI guess we will.â
When Ruby Rhodes is not six feet deep in The Princeton Reviewâs MCAT test prep book, she can usually be found at the small bakery five blocks west and two blocks north of your little campus, a family-owned place passed down through three generations. Itâs her favorite place, and yours, too, because the coffee is delicious and the pastries are even better.Â
Plus, hardly anyone from your school ever comes here, which means the wifi speed is eons better than the Starbucks inside the main food court.Â
Sheâs halfway through a tiramisu and a rerun of The Bachelor from two seasons ago when you sit down across from her.Â
âAny good?â You ask, pulling out your laptop and squeezing it onto the tiny marble table in between the two of you.Â
âThe food or the show?â Ruby asks over a mouthful of cake.Â
âEither.âÂ
Ruby swallows down the piece sitting on her tongue before responding. âThe tiramisu is delicious, and The Bachelor is eh. Iâve seen this episode three times already.â
âThen why are you watching it again?â You ask, laughing. Does Ruby think something different is going to happen?
âBecause weâre in between weeks right now and honestly, The Bachelor is kind of dry this season,â Ruby says with a frown.Â
âYouâve got some tiramisu on your cheek,â you tell her, pointing to the left side of her face where the bright mascarpone cream sticks out like a sore thumb against her dark skin.Â
âItâs just so yummy, I canât help but stick my whole face in it,â Ruby jokes as she wipes her face with the napkin on her lap. The Bachelor rerun plays on in the background, and you can hear the gasps of the women through Rubyâs discarded headphones.Â
You roll your eyes. âWhy do you even watch that show still? You know itâs all crap.â
âJust because you think itâs crap doesnât mean I do,â Ruby insists, playing out an argument the two of you have had plenty of times over the course of your friendship. âWatching it makes me happy. So I do it.â
âBut itâs all fake,â you say, frowning in disapproval. âThe couples donât even stay together in the end anyway.â
âItâs a totally pre-constructed show, but itâs not fake in the moment. And I donât expect the final couple to stay together.â She shrugs nonchalantly. âBelieve me, Iâve seen enough Bachelor seasons to know those odds. I just like watching the ride. Itâs cute.â
âYou say that about everything.â
âThatâs because everything is cute,â Ruby says pointedly. âI like seeing the good in people.â
Rubyâs always been the exact opposite of you in terms of worldviews. The embodiment of a real-life fairy. She puts butterfly clips in her hair and buys herself bouquets of daisies and lilies. She sits in cafes with her headphones in and sketches the people she sees outside the window. Sheâs studying to be a doctor so she can spend the rest of her life helping others.Â
And you?Â
Well, the Oscars have always been a bit of a long shot.Â
The curiosity eating at you, you pose a question to her. âHypothetically, if there were to exist a mockumentary on rom-coms and love, would you watch it?â
Ruby pauses for a second as she furrows her brows. Then she shrugs and says, âOnly if the two leads fell in love at the end. Why?â
âNo reason,â you say, looking away.Â
Thereâs no fooling Ruby and her eagle eyes.Â
âWhat is it?â She asks, a grin playing at her lips as she looks at you. âCome on, you donât just ask me shit like that without a reason.â
âItâs for a final project,â you explain succinctly. No need to go into details.Â
âYouâre making a rom-com for a final project?â Ruby sounds about as skeptical as you did when you spoke to Jungkook.Â
âItâs a mockumentary about rom-coms.â
âBut⊠itâs a rom-com, right? Like, youâre going to be making a rom-com? Where people fall in love?â
Hopefully not.Â
âSort of?â
Ruby squints her eyes, trying to process all the information. Youâre not surprised that she has to take a moment to thinkâyou are certainly the last person on earth to ever admit to filming a rom-com. But, as youâve stated, itâs not a rom-com. Itâs a mockumentary about them. That distinction is vital.
âWait, is this for that class with Pollack?â Ruby asks. âI remember you telling me you were taking it. You said this was a partner project, though, right? So who are you working with?â
Curse Ruby and her knack for remembering things. Sheâll make a great doctor, thatâs for sure, but right now you wish she would just forget things like everybody else.Â
You sigh. âJungkook.â
Ruby doesnât need to think twice about who that is. âWait, seriously? Youâre working with him? Isnât he the guy that responds to all your discussion posts?â
âYes,â you say, rubbing your temples with your fingertips. You donât even like thinking about him, let alone saying his name. The fact that he has to occupy any part of your brain at all gives you a headache.
âDamn, that sucks,â Ruby says, not feeling very sorry for you at all. âSo youâre filming a rom-com with him?â
âItâs a mockumentary,â you specify, feeling yourself getting irritated. âIt is fake.â
âJust like my shows, huh?â Ruby muses to herself, too analytical for her own good.Â
âListen, you donât need to fall in love to make a mockumentary about it,â you say, refusing to consider any sort of alternative.Â
âDonât you?â
You sneer. âJust shut up and eat your tiramisu.â
Ruby lets out a laugh at that, this wonderful mix between a wheeze and a honk that makes you smile every time you hear it, even if itâs at your own expense. Ruby decides sheâs had enough of mentally torturing you with the thought of feeling anything but extreme distaste towards Jungkook and goes back to her show, letting you brood in peace.Â
You donât need to fall in love to make a film about it. Just like you donât need to be a masterchef to film Gordon Ramsey screaming at someone who undercooked chicken. Youâre a filmmaker. You can make a film out of anything. Including love. Even if it is with someone like Jungkook.Â
Canât you?
Jeon Jungkook may be a disillusioned college student in love with the idea of love itself, but at least heâs not too shabby of a filmmaker.Â
Funnily enough, it actually sort of surprises you that youâve never encountered each other before. Especially considering youâre in the same major program at your school, a program that only accepts about fifty students per year at most. You suppose that in whatever general program classes you had to take in freshman and sophomore year you just never crossed paths. Plus, heâs a filmmaking concentration and youâre doing screenwriting, so itâs very possible that you would have just never spoken had the two of you not registered for the same semester of FILM395.
Huh. Imagine that. A life without him.Â
Sort of makes you wish you had put this class off for one more semester.Â
As the two of you kickstart your project, you both immediately agree that you need a third personâs help. You and Jungkook can do plenty, but you are only two people. And thereâs nothing in the final project guidelines that says you canât enlist other people to partake in the production. But you donât need help with the filming and editing. You need help with the interviews.Â
âIs this bedsheet good enough?â Kim Taehyung, a senior in the film program, asks as heâs Command-stripping a queen-sized black bedsheet to an empty wall in the living room of his tiny one-bedroom apartment.Â
âAs long as it fits into the frame,â Jungkook responds from where heâs standing behind the camera, set up on a tripod to capture a specific angle. âYouâre not going to be in the shot anyway. Youâll just be asking the questions.â
âGood, because I look really ugly right now,â Taehyung says with a grin. You roll your eyes. Taehyung must know he always looks good. Even you canât deny him of that.Â
âThis is ridiculous,â you say, seated on the singular couch in his apartment. Youâre leaning on your elbow as you watch Taehyung fiddle with the bedsheet and Jungkook futz with the camera, the two of them repositioning themselves over and over again until everythingâs perfect. âWhat are you even gonna ask us?â
âI came up with some⊠preliminary questions,â Taehyung says suggestively. âBut I havenât told either of you what they are so that your reactions can be more genuine.â
âGreat,â you deadpan.Â
âWow, someoneâs excited,â Jungkook comments snidely.Â
âI know we agreed on periodic interviews for the sake of the mockumentary but I donât know why we have to be so⊠so serious about them,â you say with a frown.Â
âWe have to promise to be honest with what we say, alright? Like, actually honest. This sets a guideline for the rest of our relationship,â Jungkook says like itâs no big deal. Like the foundation of your relationship isnât the fact that the two of you have been engaged in discussion-board war ever since the semester began.Â
âOur ârelationshipâ?â You say with a scoff.Â
âDo you promise?â Jungkook says.Â
You roll your eyes. âYes, I promise.â Whatever. âWhat do you even think is going to happen between us in the next few weeks?â
Jungkook smirks. âGuess weâll just have to wait and see, wonât we?â
You donât like the sound of that.Â
Over the next ten minutes, Taehyung gets the sheet attached to his wall and pulls over two stools from his kitchen counters, old-timey wooden ones he got from a thrift store for five dollars a pop, one for him and one for the poor soul who has to be interviewed. Youâve agreed to do them separately but Taehyungâs apartment is only so big and you are only three people, which means that whoever isnât being interviewed still has to be behind the camera, listening to the other person.Â
Makes you sort of nervous about whateverâs stewing up inside Jungkookâs mind. Wonder what the hell it is heâs plotting up there.Â
Once everything is settled, Taehyung looks at the two of you as he asks whoâs going first.Â
You turn to Jungkook, whoâs already grinning. âLadies first.â
For someone who has spent their whole life watching and making movies, being in front of the camera feels weirdly uncomfortable to you. Youâre so used to being behind it instead, directing others as they move around the frame, telling them how to feel and how to act and what to say, that having the spotlight shone on you is like picking through your thoughts with a fine-toothed comb.Â
You adjust awkwardly in the bar stool seat as Jungkook stands behind the camera, twisting the lens until he gives you the thumbs-up. Quite frankly, it doesnât make you feel any better.Â
âYou ready?â Taehyung asks as he takes a seat opposite you, just out of frame.Â
âWell, weâve gotta start somewhere, right?â
âThatâs the spirit. Alright, Jungkook, start whenever youâre good.â
âOkay,â Jungkook chirps up. âThree, two, oneââ He points to the both of you.Â
âSo, Y/N,â Taehyung begins, his voice suddenly much clearer. He sounds sort of like a news anchor. Itâs oddly fitting. âAre you excited to begin the filming for this?â
âI donât really have a choice, do I?â You muse.Â
âThat didnât answer my question,â Taehyung points out. Good thing the camera canât see the way his eyebrows raise.Â
âI suppose that there are worse things I could be doing,â you reason, which is about as good of an answer as Taehyungâs going to get. What was he expecting you to say? That you were thrilled to be filming this not-a-rom-com with your class nemesis? That you couldnât wait to see what would happen?
âLoving the enthusiasm,â Taehyung jokes. You wonder what your classmates will think when they watch this back, hearing this unidentified deep male voice ask you and Jungkook questions about your relationship. âLet me ask you this: whatâs your current relationship with Jungkook?â
âUhâŠâ you begin, nervous. Behind the camera, Jungkook has that same stupid, shit-eating grin plastered all over his face. You sneer. âItâs⊠itâs professional.â
âCan you explain what you mean by that?âÂ
âI mean weâre classmates. Thatâs the relationship.â
âThatâs it?â You can hear the skepticism in Taehyungâs voice, almost like heâs egging you on to say something more.Â
âWeâve had some personal disagreements on topics discussed in class. But yes, weâre just classmates,â you elaborate slightly. Itâs not as if anyone needs reminding of that, anyway. They all see your discussion board posts.Â
âAnd how do you expect that relationship to change over the course of this project?â
âI donât think itâll change at all.â Itâs the easiest answer so far. Requires no energy nor brain power for you to think about it.Â
Taehyung nods his head in intrigue. âAnd whyâs that?â
âBecause this is a project for a class, not a life lesson.â
âWho says it canât be both?â
You frown. âWhose side are you on?â
Five feet away, Jungkook laughs.Â
Taehyung chuckles. âAlright, moving on. What do you expect from Jungkook over the next few weeks as you start working on building your relationship?â
âI hope he becomes less unbearable,â you say, though you suppose thatâs more of a general life goal than one thatâs project-specific. But it would be nice if he became a little more⊠palatable. Just so you donât have to feel the urge to sock him in the face every time you speak to each other.Â
ââLess unbearableâ, excellent,â Taehyung repeats. âAnything else?â
âWell,â you say with a shrug, not sure what else to say. What do you want from Jungkook? Obviously the two of you are about to embark on your own rom-com adventure, no doubt most of it his doing, but itâs hard to imagine that he himself (or you, for that matter) will change. If anything, the rom-com setting will just exacerbate the worst parts of both your personalities. Like some sort of curse. âI guess I just hope that the project goes smoothly.â
âI hope that it does, too,â Taehyung says with a smile. âOkay, last question.â Thank God. This interview couldnât have been more than five minutes, but it feels like an eternity to you. âDo you think you and Jungkook will fall in love at the end of this?â
âNo.â You donât leave any room for hesitation. âI donât.â
âWhy not?â
âWeâre very different people with very different interests,â you explain succinctly. Youâre sure Taehyung will grasp that once Jungkook has his turn and answers all the same questions. âHe can try his hardest, but some things are just meant to stay the way they are.â
âOkay, thank you, Y/N, thatâs all. I hope you found our conversation illuminating,â Taehyung says, his cue for the camera to stop rolling. You and Taehyung both turn to Jungkook, waiting for his signal, letting out a sigh when Jungkook gives you a thumbs-up.Â
âThank fuck,â you say, hopping off of the barstool happily. You head towards the camera, ready to kick Jungkook off of it, because itâs your turn to stand behind it with an annoying look on your face as you react to every stupid thing Jungkook says. You find that youâre actually sort of looking forward to it. Being behind the camera is where you feel most at home. Making faces at Jungkook is just a bonus.Â
Jungkookâs still grinning that same goddamn grin when you approach him, making you narrow your eyes.Â
ââHe can try his hardestâ?â Jungkook teases, voice all high-pitched to mimic yours. âSounds like a challenge.â
âAh yes, my mission in life,â you retort easily. Maybe goading him on isnât the best course of action, but youâre so confident that you wonât change your mind you find yourself actually anticipating his efforts. âThink you have what it takes?â
âBelieve me, I do,â Jungkook says with a devilish glint in his eyes.Â
You roll your eyes and kick him off the camera with a shove, pushing him towards Taehyung as he waits diligently on that chair of his.Â
âSo, Jungkook, same questions,â Taehyung says as Jungkook gets ready in his seat, fixing the blonde strands of hair that curl around the side of his face, framing his cheeks.Â
âWhat? Thatâs no fair, he got to think about all his answers,â you exclaim, positively indignant.Â
âDonât worry, Y/N,â Jungkook says, voice sickly smooth, honey falling off his lips. âIâve actually been thinking about the two of us for a long time.â
You pretend to throw up on Taehyungâs hardwood floor.Â
As Taehyung promised, he asks Jungkook the same questions. And, as predicted, his answers about as far away from yours as the sun is from Pluto:
âAre you excited to begin the filming for this?â
Jungkook grins. âYes, definitely. I actually took this class after hearing from a friend that the final project was a lot of fun.â
Taehyung beams. That friend was him. No wonder he was so happy to sign onto helping the two of you.Â
âAnd how would you describe your current relationship with Y/N?â
âWeâre soon-to-be-lovers.âÂ
âHow forward of you.â
âIsnât that my job?â
You have to stop yourself from bursting out into laughter behind the camera and ruining the interview. At least heâs not hiding anything. Youâll give him that.Â
âSo I suppose you expect the two of you to fall in love over the course of the project?â
âYes, thatâs going to happen.â
âAnd you seem pretty confident when you say that.â
Jungkook smirks as he turns to the camera. Or, more accurately, you. âConfidence is attractive.âÂ
You shake your head back at him.Â
The rest of the interview falls pretty much into the same vein as the first few questions. Jungkook is so brazenly determined and hopeful and optimistic it actually pains you in a way, watching him make all of these promises both to you and himself that this project is going to turn out the way he hopes it does. His answers remind you of his discussion board posts, always looking on the bright side of every movie you watch, always finding the silver lining, the light at the end of the tunnel. A movie could be total Hollywood crap, filled with cheating scandals and misunderstandings and betrayals, and Jungkook could still find beauty in it.Â
Itâs strange.Â
For the sake of you not actually throwing up in Taehyungâs lovely apartment, you tune out the majority of the middle of the conversation, having zero desire to listen to Jungkook wax poetic about your non-existent relationship like heâs saying his wedding vows. Only when Taehyung finally remarks that theyâre on the last question do you finally come to again, ready to turn the camera off as soon as Jungkook finishes his answer.Â
âJungkook, do you think you and Y/N will fall in love at the end of this?â
âI do.â Wow, what a shocker. âI do, because I hope that by the end of this Y/N will have opened her eyes to the beauty of love, and will find joy in the feeling as something that makes her feel happy and warm. Iâm going to do everything I can to make sure the things we do together are meaningful. And even if we donât last, I hope that her memories of us together will be ones she can look back upon fondly and be grateful for.â
You purse your lips together. If only it were that easy.Â
âAlright, cut,â you say, voice distant as Jungkook thanks Taehyung for his time and hops off the bar stool. âThanks, Tae.â
âAnytime, you guys,â Taehyung says with a grin.Â
Jungkook comes over to where youâre standing, possibly to grab his camera and tripod but most definitely to rub his obnoxious personality all up in your face.Â
âYou really think youâre gonna get me to fall in love with you, huh?â You muse, an eyebrow raised as you look up at him. âJust so you can prove a point?â
âBelieve it or not, Y/N, but I actually think that all people deserve the chance to experience love and that happens to include you, as well,â Jungkook responds easily.Â
The words put a sour taste in your mouth. âYou think I deserve it, huh?â
Jungkook nods, face solemn as he looks at you, gazing into your eyes with those big brown ones of his own. It makes you feel something unfamiliar. Like heâs reading right through your chest, into your heart. You donât like it. âEveryone deserves love.â
âYou guys are coming back, right? So I can leave the sheet up?â Taehyung interrupts after heâs moved both of his bar stools back to his kitchen counter.Â
âYeah, weâll be back,â Jungkook answers quickly. âThanks for setting everything up, by the way.â
âOf course. Plus, this is a good background for my nudes,â Taehyung says casually, like heâs mentioning what heâs having for dinner. âLooking forward to seeing you guys again.â
âUs, too,â Jungkook says. âReady to go?â
âOnly because it means I donât have to see you anymore,â you retort pointedly, grabbing your backpack from where it sits on his couch as you head towards the door.Â
âJust you wait, Y/N,â Jungkook says as you leave Taehyungâs building, one of those old-timey Victorian houses that was converted into a whole bunch of apartments. âYouâre gonna see that Iâm right.â
âReally? About what?â
âAbout us,â Jungkook says. You come to the stoplight, where Jungkook keeps going straight and you turn right.Â
âUs?â
Jungkook grins as you turn in the direction of your own apartment. And, just as the light turns green, he says, âJust you wait. Weâre gonna fall in love, you and me.â
If he says so.Â
âHey! Y/N!â
You whip your head around at the sound of your name just as youâre opening the door to your local Starbucks, wondering who the hell is calling out to you at nine-thirty in the morning on a Wednesday.Â
As it turns out, you donât have to wonder too much, because the moment your eyes adjust to the blinding sunlight coming from the east side of campus you see Jungkook hurtling towards you, heavy black boots stomping down on the pavement as he rushes to catch up with you.Â
âCan I help you?â You ask, thoroughly unimpressed, as you pull open the door, looking at Jungkook heaving beside you as he holds the door open for himself.Â
âJust glad I caught you,â Jungkook gasps out between breaths. âFigured this might make a good scene for the movie.â
âItâs a mockumentary,â you remind him easily, getting in the line.Â
âWhatever,â Jungkook says. âWhat do you normally get here? I donât really go to Starbucks often.â
âWhatever will give me the most caffeine for the least amount of money,â you retort.Â
âHow efficient,â Jungkook comments.Â
âYou know thatâs how I like to be,â you tell him with a pointed look.Â
Jungkook mumbles his acknowledgement as he fumbles around in his backpack, fishing through the large pocket until he whips out his Canon, holding it out in front of him like heâs a dad about to film an embarrassing shot of his child. You look down at the camera just as he pans up to you, a confused frown written across your features. Jungkook laughs.Â
âDo you really need to do that here?â
âIâm not even filming,â Jungkook says with a smile, like he just pulled his camera out so he could look at your unimpressed face through a different lens. âLook, youâre up.â
You turn around to find that the woman ahead of you in line has just moved towards the pick-up side of the counter, so you shimmy over towards the barista, ready to get this over with so you can dart out of the Starbucks as soon as possible.Â
âJust a grande Americano, please,â you request simply, fingers grasping for the wallet inside your coat pocket.Â
âMe too,â Jungkook chirps up from behind you. The closeness of his voice makes you jump, and suddenly you become keenly cognizant of how heâs practically pressed up next to you as he leans over towards the counter. You catch a glimpse of the debit card in his hand. âHere.â
âYou donât have to pay for me, itâs fine,â you quickly say, holding out your own card to the barista.Â
âNo, itâs okay, I want to. Here.â Jungkook pushes your hand away as he tries to stuff his card into the reader.Â
âNo, I wonât let you. Iâm a big girl, I can pay for my own coffee,â you rebuke, feeling yourself growing oddly defensive.Â
Jungkook sighs from behind you. âOh, come on, you canât let me do one nice thing for you?â
âWill one of you please pay, youâre holding up the line,â the barista asks in a desperate tone, clearly too overworked and too underpaid to be dealing with two bratty college students like yourselves.Â
Jungkook manages to shove his card into the reader before you get the chance to do it yourself, pushing you to the side as he verifies all of his information and takes his receipt. Next to him, you seethe to yourself, feeling a personal loss even though you just got your coffee paid for. Itâs not about the money. Itâs about your pride. Never in your life have you wanted to so badly pay for an overpriced Starbucks coffee.Â
You and Jungkook mosey over to the other side of the counter, waiting for your identical drinks to be made as you try and calculate how much longer you have to stand in the same room and breathe the same air as Jungkook. Seeing him in class, on your discussion board posts, and for your arranged final project meetings apparently isnât enough, so now he has to invade your personal life, too.Â
âWhat are you doing?â You huff out angrily, turning to Jungkook even as he holds his camera out in front of him, filming the Starbucks.Â
âRecording our first meeting, obviously,â Jungkook says like itâs some kind of no-brainer. Like you were in on that from the moment he called your name out on the street.Â
âWhat do you mean, âour first meetingâ?â You scrunch up your nose in confusion. âWeâve known each other since the semester started.â
âI know, butâŠâ Jungkook trails off unhelpfully, but you pick up what heâs putting down regardless. Right. This is supposed to be a mockumentary rom-com. And rom-coms always start with an introduction.Â
The barista behind the counter calls out Jungkookâs name as he places two same-sized cups down at the pick-up station. The cup is burning hot, even with the little cardboard holder wrapped around it like a leg warmer, so you immediately move over to the station up against the wall with all of the sugar packets and napkins and little green splash sticks. Jungkook joins you without question, whether it be due to the fact that he doesnât come here very often or because he just wants to keep invading your space, you couldnât say. Grabbing one of the wooden sticks, you tug the plastic lid off of the cup and give the coffee a swirl. Watching you, Jungkook takes the lid off of his as well.Â
âAre you just going to copy everything I do?â You deadpan.Â
âNot everythingâŠâ Jungkook trails off suspiciously, looking down into his coffee like the two of them are conspiring something.Â
âWhat are you talkiââ
Without warning, Jungkook slams half of his body into you, and without a lid or one of those little green sticks, the coffee sploshes over the side of his cup and drenches the front of your exposed hoodie, hot liquid burning through the fabric of the hoodie and the t-shirt you have on underneath. You watch in horror as Jungkook plays it off like an accident, feet fumbling around on the hardwood floor like he had just tripped. But he didnât just trip. He dumped half of his Americano onto the both of your fronts.Â
âJungkook!â You say instantly, resisting the urge to scream because youâre in a public place but feeling your skin go as hot as the coffee against your torso as you look up at him, fuming.Â
âOh my God, Iâm so sorry, Iâm such a klutz,â Jungkook says, somehow able to regain his balance, hold his coffee cup, and film the whole adventure all at the same time. âThat was totally my fault, let me help you with that.âÂ
The camera is from his perspective, which you suppose is about as real as it gets for something grounded in reality like a mockumentary, but in this position heâs able to make conversation with his eyes, big brown ones wide as he tries to signify what exactly he means when he purposely spills coffee all over the two of you.Â
You get it. Youâve seen enough rom-coms to know why he just did what he did, but you still find your mouth agape as you stare up at him, smoldering and angry and a little shocked he would dare be so bold, especially in the middle of a Starbucks coffee shop.Â
âFor Godâs sake,â you say with an exhausted sigh despite it not even being ten in the morning yet. Unable to form any other comprehensible words, you settle for just pulling out napkins from the dispenser and dabbing the front of your hoodie as Jungkook looks at you apologetically. You canât even tell if heâs truly sorry or just putting on another one of his shows.Â
âI feel so bad,â Jungkook says, and you calm yourself down enough to nod. At least he isnât blatantly laughing. âCan I pay for dry cleaning?â
âYouâre really gonna offer to pay for my dry cleaning?â You ask, an eyebrow raised.Â
âIt was my fault,â Jungkook admits. Now that you can agree on.Â
You shake your head. âItâs okay. Itâs just an old hoodie, itâs no big deal.â
âIâm still sorry,â Jungkook insists, and the more he says it the more you actually find yourself starting to believe him. Even if he did just spill coffee all over you. âHere, let me give you my jacketââ
âThatâs not necessary,â you say as he shrugs off his backpack and begins to remove the bulky denim jacket heâs wearing, fabric worn and soft from years of use. âSeriously, itâs okay, itâs just a hoodie.â
âYeah, but now you have coffee all over your clothes and you probably have class soon, right?â He says, an apologetic smile lacing his lips. He tugs off his jacket and holds it out towards you.Â
âJungkook, Iâm fine, alright? I appreciate your concern, though,â you assure him. You throw away the last of the coffee-stained napkins in your hands and reach down for your backpack, which you had taken off your shoulders somewhere in the chaos.Â
Jungkook rolls his eyes, almost as if he was expecting resistance, and leans over you anyway. His arms extend outwards as he wraps his enormous denim jacket over your shoulders, the fabric draping loosely over your body. The damn thing was big on him, so on you it practically eats you up. You stand there, silent, as Jungkook adjusts the jacket on your torso, pulling underneath the hood of your sweatshirt as he makes sure itâs snug across your figure.Â
âThere,â Jungkook says.Â
âThanks,â you say, a half grin playing on your lips. The gesture makes you wonder if Jungkook really was planning on giving up his jacket this early in the morning for the sake of your movie. âThatâs nice of you.â
âI hope it makes up for the fact that you smell like coffee now,â Jungkook says, a hand coming up to rub at the nape of his neck.Â
âI appreciate it,â you say.Â
âI have class, too, so I have to go,â Jungkook says, hoisting his backpack on his shoulders as he tucks his camera away. âIâm sorry again! See you around?â
Like you even have a choice.Â
âYeah, see you around,â you say as Jungkook darts off just as quickly as he arrived, rushing out the door before you have the chance to change your mind and give him his jacket back.Â
When he leaves you, you find yourself at a loss for words. You stand there, lips pursed, coffee cold, as the weight of his jacket rests heavy on your shoulders.Â
It smells like him.Â
You should have known he would do something like this. Spill coffee all over the two of you, offer you his jacket, dash off like Cinderella at midnight. Like the opening of the worldâs worst rom-com. The start of what is no doubt going to be the most unbearable final project you have ever done.
Plus, the other thing itâs ensured is a second meeting. How else is he going to get his jacket back?
And you know what the worst part is?
This is only the beginning.
This time after FILM395 ends lecture for the day, itâs your turn to catch Jungkook lounging around after class.Â
Heâs lingering around the outside of the building, scrolling through his phone, a heavy leather jacket resting over a flannel that goes down to his knees and a baseball cap sitting firmly on his tuft of blonde hair. Heâs obviously not paying attention to any of his surroundings whatsoever, because he doesnât even notice you exiting out of the door heâs standing by until you say his name.Â
âJungkook,â you say, arriving in front of him.Â
âWhaâoh, hi,â Jungkook says, jumping at the suddenness of it all.Â
âHere,â you say, holding out his oversized denim jacket in between the two of you. âThanks for letting me borrow it.â
âOh, I didnât know you were going to give it back so soon,â Jungkook says, looking a little surprised and⊠is he touched?Â
âI was going to give it to you a couple days ago but I thought I should give it a wash first,â you admit to him.Â
Instinctively, Jungkook brings the jacket up to his nose to sniff it. âSmells like lavender.â
âYeah, itâs my detergent. Hope you donât mind. Itâs a little wrinkledâI let it air dry since I was worried it might shrink in the dryer.â
âThanks,â Jungkook says, a genuine smile lacing itself across his features. Itâs not one you see too often, and definitely not the kind of smile he usually flashes in your direction. Those are all so obnoxious, so full of himself. This oneâs different. Itâs appreciative. Kinder. Softer. In a lot of ways. âI was thinking, if you donât have class now, do you wanna grab some coffee?â
You narrow your eyes. âOnly if you promise not to spill it on me this time.â
Jungkook laughs, throwing his head back. âOkay, I got it. I wonât spill it on you.â
âPromise?â You prompt.Â
âPromise.â
The walk to Starbucks this time is in relative silence, but neither of you seems to mind it very much. You arenât dashing to catch up with each other and heaving snarky comments as you catch your breath. Jungkook even notices you shiver in the cool March breeze and wraps his jacket around you again anyway, although this time you make a mental note to make sure he doesnât leave without it. Even though a lavender scent wafts off of the denim, it still smells a little bit like him. That boyish sort of aroma. You donât think any detergent would ever be able to get rid of that.Â
You and Jungkook both get americanos again because youâre predictable and creatures of habit, and Jungkook actually seems to quite like them. He pays and you donât spend two minutes standing in front of the barista fighting over it. Jungkook seems so determined to pay the extra four dollars for your drink that you arenât sure if itâs really worth arguing over it for the sake of pride anymore. What you and Jungkook put into making this project a success is what youâre going to get out of it.Â
He picks one of the longer tables in the back of the study space, empty because itâs just after the lunchtime rush and most people have classes now, sets up the camera at one end, and you sit down at the other.Â
âSo,â you begin, not sure where to start because your coffee is too hot to take a sip from it.Â
âSo,â Jungkook echoes.Â
Silence.Â
You purse your lips in that awkward, I-donât-know-what-to-say kind of way. âWhat do you want to do?â
Jungkook grins. âThis is the part where we get to know each other.âÂ
âWe already know each other.â You frown.
âDo we?â Jungkook poses, an eyebrow raised. âI mean, yeah, I guess we arenât strangers, but I donât know anything about you. Other than youâre a film major in a rom-com class who hates rom-coms.â
âI donât hate rom-coms,â you object. âI just think itâs important to look at them from a critical lens.â
âOkay, whatever,â Jungkook says, shrugging you off. âThe point is that we donât know anything else about each other. Like, whatâs your favorite color, for example?â
âPurple.â Itâs an easy answer. You wore purple princess dresses when you were five, painted your bedroom lilac when you were ten, and still make sure to keep a purple highlighter in your pencil case now. âWhatâs yours?â
âRed,â Jungkook responds.Â
âCool,â you say, effectively ending the rest of the conversation.
Jungkook, sensing that same awkward silence, suggests something. âHow about you ask me something now? We can go back and forth.â
You shrug. Itâs not like you have anything better to do. âAlright.â You think for a moment, but then you have the perfect question. âWhy film?â
Jungkook was clearly not expecting something so loaded, because his brows furrow, knitting themselves together as he begins to figure out a good enough answer. âHmm,â he says, lost deep in thought. âI suppose the standard answer would be that Iâve always been interested in it, but I think I chose film because I want to be able to have the gift to tell other peopleâs stories. Being a filmmaker doesnât just mean you stand behind a camera. It means you immerse yourself in the lives of other people to create something new. And⊠I donât know. I guess I really like doing that.âÂ
You nod.Â
For once, you understand him. Understand why he chose to major in film, why he chose to be in this tiny little program. Because there is so much out there, so much that you will never know, people you will never meet and things you will never see. And itâs a filmmakerâs job to make them turn into things you will see, people you will meet. Who knows the world better than the people who study it? The people who have devoted their lives to learning all its secrets?
âWhat about you?â
âSame as you,â you tell him. âFilm is an art but itâs more than that to me. Itâs a new way to look at the world. Itâs several new ways to look at the world, depending on what kind of film you want to create and what kind of story you want to tell. I think itâs important to show people that all of the things they see in the media every day are not always reality. And that real people deserve to have their stories told, too. I donât know. Thatâs what I think.â
Jungkook grins, a twinkle in his eyes. âReal people like us?â
âThis project is different,â you insist.Â
âI donât think it is,â Jungkook says. âYou said it yourself, weâre making this because itâs important to show people that the Hollywood entertainment they consume is not reality. This is. This is reality.â
You frown, kicking yourself in the shin because what was supposed to be a harmless conversation has now turned into an opportunity for Jungkook to try and convince you that you will, in fact, fall in love with him. Youâve dug your own grave and Jungkook was the one who handed you the shovel.Â
âYouâre not giving up, are you?â You say, shaking your head, flabbergasted. âReality is the fact that this project is not going to make me fall in love with you. Nothing is.â
âDonât be so sure about that,â Jungkook warns. âIâve got a few tricks up my sleeve.â
âYou mean like spilling burning hot coffee all over me?â You ask, an eyebrow raised, a grudge still held.Â
âWe had to start somewhere,â Jungkook defends. âAnd you seemed to understand what I was doing pretty quickly.â
âItâs not the worst thing someoneâs done to me,â you concede, only slightly. âBesides, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but throwing hot coffee all over me is not really a good way to start off your plan to get me to fall in love with you.â
Jungkook smiles. âAll in due time, Y/N. All in due time.â
âI canât believe Pollack actually paired us up together,â you say with a sigh. âYou know she did it on purpose.â
âOf course she did.â Itâs not really a surprise to either of you.Â
âI met with her right after she announced our partners,â you tell him, âshe said it was because she wanted to see what kind of project we would come up with. How we would address our⊠differing views on love.â Thatâs one way of putting it. A rather nice way, if you do say so yourself.
âSpeaking of which,â Jungkook says, something suddenly flashing through his mind, âwhat do you really think about love? You know, other than itâs unrealistic and ruins peopleâs lives.â
âYou make me sound like Ebeneezer Scrooge.â You frown at him.Â
âIâm serious,â insists Jungkook. âWhy are you so pessimistic about it? Have you ever been in love? Have you had bad experiences? You couldnât have just developed this worldview over time.â
You scowl, feeling yourself getting defensive. âWell, maybe I did. Maybe thatâs just what I think. Why do you care?â
âBecause people donât just hate love for no reason,â Jungkook exclaims. âCome on, there must be something.â
Your body stiffens. Who is he to be asking you this sort of shit? Why does he care so much? Itâs not like it will have any effect on the outcome of your project. Not like you explaining yourself will change the way either of you look at the world.Â
âWhatâs it to you?â You challenge. âWhy do you love love so much? Have you ever fallen in love? Do you think itâs suddenly going to solve all of your problems?â
âI love it because I think it brings people real joy,â Jungkook answers simply. âIt makes people happy and itâs beautiful. I love love and Iâm not ashamed to say that out loud. I believe in it. I believe in love, and in destiny, and in soulmates. I want that. I think everyone deserves it.â
 You scoff to yourself. âYou believe in soulmates?â
âI think we all have our people out there.â Jungkook nods. âDonât you?â
You roll your eyes, arms crossed over your chest. This conversation has gone nowhere, and Jungkook looks as equally dissatisfied as you do.Â
âI think love can make us do stupid things,â you tell him succinctly, if a little jaded. No need to say anything else. Your explanation is right there. âWeâre just different, I guess. You and I.â
Jungkook blinks at you, eyes wide and a little desperate. Your conversation has remained stagnant and thereâs almost nothing left to say.Â
Almost.Â
âDonât you ever want to fall in love?â He asks, like itâs a last-ditch effort to get you to believe.Â
You freeze. Let the words sink in for a moment. Before you push them out the door and toss them into the garbage. Just thinking about it gives you a headache. Puts a sour taste in your mouth.Â
Quickly, you push yourself out of your chair and stand up, grabbing your coffee with one hand and your backpack with the other. âI have to go, sorry. I just remembered Iâm meeting up with a friend to help her with a photography shoot,â you fumble out quickly, the legs of the chair screeching as you scoot them across the hardwood floor. âOh, hereâs your jacket, too. Thanks for giving it to me again. Iâll see you in class.â
You whip around and head towards the exit, and only when youâre outside of the Starbucks and passing by the window do you dare look back. Do you dare let your gaze drift back to Jungkook, who is sitting there like he still doesnât understand you. Still canât.Â
You and Jungkook are final project partners and maybe, if youâre pushing it, acquaintances-slash-friends. But there are just some things better kept to yourself.Â
Weâre reaching the halfway point in this semester and, as you all know, I donât do midterms. That said, I still want you to reflect on what youâve learned, discovered, and thought about thus far in this class. What portrayal of love did you find the most realistic? The least? How have they changed the way you think about love, both from a personal and a film perspective?
Y/N Y/N on March 3rd at 6:08PM
Purely from a film perspective, I really did enjoy watching Juno. It was funny and raunchy and just the right amount of vulnerable. It certainly felt the most real. So far, no film in this class has topped it for me. 500 Days of Summer, on the other hand, was in my opinion extremely unsatisfying and left no positive impression. The ending was a bore and Tom had absolutely no spine. It was a shame, because the direction and production was actually quite good.Â
I guess Iâm starting to realize how real love is not pretty. It can make people just as sad as it can make them happy. Why donât we show the sad sides of love, too? The sides where your room is covered with a pile of clothes because you canât bring yourself to do the laundry? Where you cannot cook a meal because it reminds you of a breakup? Rom-coms are, obviously, not the most realistic. But why are there not more films that do cover whatâs real? How can we love love if all we know is a lie?
Jeon Jungkook on March 3rd at 11:13PM
Of course, I thought The Big Sick did an excellent job of their portrayal of love, adult life, and the problems that plague us all in the twenty-first century. It was also just as emotional and touched on concepts of race, illness, and being in your twenties and having no idea what direction your life is going in. The Princess Bride, on the other hand, as much as I love it, I do think created a more circumstantial kind of love. Westley and Buttercup mostly fall in love because of their situations. But it remains a classic nonetheless.Â
Iâm satisfied with the way the film industry has produced rom-coms and handles love. The beauty of it is that love is different for every person who goes through it. It can bring the greatest joy and the most painful sorrow. We do not just figure out what love is by what we see on film. We see it in our real lives, in our parents, in our friends, in couples in coffee shops and cars and on sidewalks. We can love love because we want that joy for ourselves. Because we know that true love will be worth any heartbreak we endure. Is it not impossible for the portrayals of love in these rom-coms to not be real? The way everyone experiences it is different. The only way you can know what real love is, and what it is not, is if you fall in love yourself.Â
Early on in your project development, you and Jungkook exchanged class schedules to optimize your productivity and skip over that stupid, terrible part of partner projects where youâre just going back and forth trying to pick a time that works for the both of you until you eventually settle on something ridiculous like eleven oâclock at night outside of the McDonaldâs two blocks off of campus.Â
Itâs been working very well. Neither of you have adventurous-enough friends to invite you out on spontaneous picnics and restaurant dates that fuck with your pre-scheduled meeting times, and Jungkook already seems to have mastered the art of screaming your name when he catches you on the sidewalk so that you can film something.Â
In fact, youâre actually beginning to wonder why you havenât done this with all of your long-term partner projects. Send each other your schedules so that you can settle on a time in advance. No muss, no fuss.Â
You and Jungkook are supposed to meet up again tonight, after the two of you are finished with all of your classes, to discuss what scenes you should be filming next. Edited down, youâve already got about ten minutes worth of footage, but itâs mid-March and the project is due at the end of April. So you need to get this show on the road.Â
The door slams shut behind you as you exit the business building, your film industry class having just ended a minute ago. Youâve got an hour to kill before your next class, just enough time to dash to the food court in the center of campus and grab something from the Japanese place in the back corner. You might even have time to browse the shelves in the bookstore if youâre fast enough.Â
You round the corner to the main pathway through campus when a voice stops you in your tracks.Â
âYouâre just too good to be trueâŠâ
âCanât take my eyes off of youâŠâ
Itâs not Jungkook. Instead, in the middle of the walkway are the Eighth Notes, one of the fifteen-thousand (you donât know for sure, but if you had to estimate) acapella groups on campus. Theyâve got mic stands and a table set up and everything. Maybe theyâre promoting an upcoming showâŠ?Â
You almost breeze right by when one of them, the one in the middle of the group, points right at you, a lopsided grin lacing his features. You arenât one to normally stop in the middle of a crowded footpath, but when, one after another, all six of the boys start pointing at you, you have no choice.Â
âYouâd be like Heaven to touchâŠâ
âI wanna hold you so muchâŠâÂ
âAt long last, love has arrivedâŠâ
âAnd I thank God Iâm aliveâŠâ
âYouâre just too good to be trueâŠâ
âCanât take my eyes off of youâŠâ
Their voices are smooth like honey, warm and deep, romancing you through their mics as each one of them suddenly manifests a rose from behind them. Around you, people are starting to stare, gawking at you as they walk by. Thereâs even a small crowd starting to gather, and you swear you can see some people filming on their phones. The fact that this is happening in the busiest ten minutes of the day, as half the student body is walking from one class to another, isnât helping. At all.Â
The rest of them singing in the background, each one steps out from behind the set of microphones to hand you the rose, smiling their classic, old-timey smiles like those old jazz singers from the 1960s, until youâve got half a dozen in your hands as they continue to sing.Â
âBut if you feel like I feelâŠâ
âPlease let me know that itâs realâŠâ
âYouâre just too good to be trueâŠâ
âCanât take my eyes off of youâŠâ
And then, suddenly, all of them are shutting their traps and turning to the left, looking down the pathway as the song begins again, but from one-hundred feet away.Â
âI love you, baby, and if itâs quite alright, I need you, baby, to warm the lonely nightâŠâ
Your mouth drops. At the other end of the walkway is Jungkook, one of those wireless microphones in his hand, grinning as he saunters down the path like a prince at a ball, voice sweet and thick as the words dance off of his lips.Â
âI love you, baby, trust in me when I sayâŠâ
Your eyes lock from opposite ends of the path, Jungkook stepping closer with every beat the Eighth Notes gives him. It sort of feels like your impending doom and a wedding proposal, all at once. By now a rather substantial audience has gathered, lining the walkway with their phones out, filming Jungkook as he waltzes past them, occasionally turning to capture your gobsmacked expression.Â
Every step that Jungkook takes makes your heart race something fierce, cheeks warming in embarrassment, trapped in your least favorite thing in the entire world: a public serenade. You canât really do anything except look at him in shock, feeling his steady gaze resting firmly on your figure, looking right at you. Into you.Â
âOh, pretty baby, donât bring me down, I prayâŠâ
Oh, pretty baby, now that Iâve found you, stayâŠâ
Jungkook, on the other hand, is clearly relishing in this. In the spotlight. In the music. Or maybe just in the fact that youâre on the receiving end of his over-the-top advances. His grin is wide as he takes those last few steps, microphone gripped neatly in his hand, the lyrics warm and weighty as they tumble from his lips.Â
âAnd let me love you, babyâŠâ
One final step and heâs right in front of you, staring into your eyes, letting himself bask in the look on your face. He produces a rose himselfâcherry red, like his favorite colorâand holds it out in between the two of you. In the background, the Eighth Notes go quiet, leaving Jungkook on his own for the final line.Â
âLet me love youâŠâ
The words drift above your heads, disappearing into the sky as he lingers on them, on that last note, beaming down at you. He looks at you, so hopeful, so happy, so endeared, and what else can you do? What else, besides taking the rose from his hand and smiling back up at him? Who are you to deny him of that?
The crowd around you cheers when you do, applauding both Jungkook and the Eighth Notes, with whom he is apparently in cahoots, before they all decide that they ought to get on with their day and head to class. No doubt youâll be on several dozen Instagram stories by nightfall.Â
Only after everyone has dispersed do you notice Taehyung, who must have been here since the beginning, because heâs just turning off the camera dangling from his neck. Of course Jungkook got him to film. Other than your project, what else would this be for?
âIs that the best you can do, Jungkook?â You smirk up at him, only saying this because you canât have him knowing that you actually kind of enjoyed it.Â
âYouâre still here, arenât you?â Jungkook responds easily. âThought I would do something spontaneous.â
âAnd now youâve taken up ten minutes of my lunch,â you say, shaking your head to yourself. âHow spontaneous, indeed.â
âHow was that, Jungkook?â
Behind the two of you, the Eighth Notes are packing up, clearly more than happy to have aided Jungkook on his quest for so-called love and getting to promote their group in the process.Â
âGreat, thank you so much, Jimin,â Jungkook says to the one in the middle, the very first one to sing when you walked out of the door.Â
âAnytime, dude. Glad we could help,â Jimin responds. He waves hi to Taehyung, too, as they store their microphones and go on their way.Â
Jungkook bids them goodbye as they head down the path, smiling at all of them before he turns back to you, notices the distant, faraway look in your eyes as you twirl the rose between your fingers, press it to your nose to pick up its scent.Â
âYou gotta admit, Iâm a pretty good singer, eh?â Jungkook says with a nudge to your shoulder.Â
âYouâre alright.â
Jungkook laughs to himself. âI think thatâs the nicest thing youâve ever said to me.â
âDonât get a big head,â you warn.Â
âThink Iâll have to sing for you more, now, hmm? Since you liked it so much?â He suggests, eyebrows wiggling.Â
You roll your eyes. âOnly if you can get Jimin and the Eighth Notes to back you up, again. Then maybe Iâll allow it.â
Jungkook grins. Heâs far past the point of being deterred by your deadpan comments. If anything, they only encourage him more. But you, for obvious reasons, cannot give in. At least, not yet, anyway.Â
âOkay, go eat your lunch,â he says, nodding as you begin to part ways. âIâll text you later, okay?â
You smile. âOkay. See you.â
âSee you, too.â
The moment you get back to your apartment you put all seven roses in an old vase filled with water. They brighten up your bedroom instantly, soft scent freshening up the air. And when you go to bed that night, it is to Jungkookâs sweet, delicate voice, like walking on clouds, like satin and silk, that you fall asleep.
âGood morning, Y/N,â Jungkook greets like always, smiling at you as you walk in the door for FILM395.Â
âGood morning, Jungkook,â you say in response.Â
Then, you take a seat right next to him.Â
Itâs an act that clearly catches everyone off guard, if the bewildered looks of your fellow classmates and Jungkookâs confused expression are anything to go by. Even Pollack, when she walks through the door, gets a bit of a shock, eyes widening when she sees the two of you seated next to each other.Â
You suppose all the fuss is understandable. After all, you both sort of hate each other.Â
Other than the sudden change in seating arrangement, however, the rest of the class goes off without much issue. Pollack lectures for an hour before you move into discussion, at which point it becomes a class participation free-for-all, with you and Jungkook almost definitely in the lead. Just because youâre now sitting next to each other doesnât mean either of you are suddenly going to stop raising your hands to rebuke each otherâs points. Some things never change.Â
Sitting next to Jungkook is not as bad as you thought it would be. For one, he is, for the most part, a rather diligent student. Other than his occasional flicks to his email, an essay heâs working on, or your discussion board, he mostly sits and takes notes and doesnât do anything else. That, you can at least give him credit for. And even though your elbows almost always nearly crash into each otherâs when youâre raising your hands to respond to a point Pollackâs made, discussion isnât so bad either.Â
One of the perks of sitting directly beside each other is that whenever he says something stupid, or saccharine, or just overly unrealistic, you donât have to just roll your eyes from the back of the classroom while you wait to be called on. You also get to kick his foot with your own, nudge your elbow into his side. And he does the same to you. You and Jungkook are like those neighbors in sitcoms that spend all their free time shouting at each other from opposite windows. Just because your seats have gotten closer doesnât mean your viewpoints have.Â
A notification pops up on your laptop.
[March 17th, 11:05AM]
Jungkook: wanna meet at the tables outside after class?
You look over at Jungkook with a frown.
You: Why are you texting me? Weâre sitting right next to each other
Jungkook: because weâre in class obvs
Jungkook: dont wanna be disruptive
You: Since when has that ever stopped you before?
Jungkook: haha very funny
Jungkook: tables sound good?
You: Only since you asked so nicely :)
Jungkook: thoughtful as always i see
After class, you and Jungkook both hang around, waiting for each other to pack up your belongings so you can walk to the tables together. Everyone else seems to sense this weird, uncomfortable tension in the room, because they all book it out of the door much faster than either of you do. Youâre almost convinced Jungkook purposely takes extra time to zip his backpack, just because.Â
The tables are, as per usual, empty. But you donât have a pile of receipts to spread out, this time. You and Jungkook take a seat at one of them as you pull out your laptops, ready to outline the rest of the project.Â
âWe should probably meet with Taehyung a couple more times, too,â you suggest as you begin to brainstorm.Â
âSounds good,â Jungkook agrees. âBut we canât meet at night on weekdays anymore. My dance groupâs show is coming up and we have practice then.â
You stop typing and turn to him. âI didnât know you were in a dance group.â
Jungkook shrugs, like itâs no big deal. âI donât really talk about it that much.â
âYou should.â
He looks up at you at that, eyes wide as he faces you.Â
âI donât know, it seems like something you should be passionate about,â you say. In the same way that you promote the Film Club to every freshman you know, force all your friends to mark that theyâre Interested in your event pages on Facebook. Jungkook should want to tell everyone about his dance group. Doesnât he love it? Isnât he proud to be in it?
Jungkook doesnât look like he knows what to say to that. So he doesnât say anything at all.Â
âWe can meet on weekends too,â you say, adjusting to his new change of schedule easily. âThis project isnât as all-consuming as I thought it would be.â
âYou mean Iâm not as all-consuming as you thought I would be,â Jungkook corrects.Â
You shake your head. âNo, you are.â He laughs. âBut yeah, on weekends is fine. You know my schedule. What else should we do, besides talk to Taehyung?â
Itâs like a lightbulb goes off above Jungkookâs head. âLetâs go on a date.â
You narrow your eyes at him. âNo.â
âWhat do you mean, ânoâ? Itâs the natural progression of our relationship! Itâs the next step in the rom-com! We have to,â Jungkook insists.Â
âFirst of all, itâs a mockumentary, not a rom-com,â you say with a sigh, finding yourself having to correct him rather frequently. âSecondly, we are not in a relationship. I am not dating you and you are not dating me.â
âOkay, but at this point in rom-coms the two leads would definitely go on a date,â Jungkook says, punctuating every word for emphasis. âWhatâs the harm? Itâs not like youâre committing yourself to a future with me.â
âThank God,â you mutter.Â
âOh, shut up. You probably havenât been on a date in years, anyway. Why not spend a night out?â
You frown at that. âWho cares if I have or have not been on a date?â Why does Jungkook care so much about the history of your love life? Heâs always saying stuff like this, always telling you things as if youâve never been in a relationship at all, donât know left from right, black from white. Who is he to be making those assumptions?
âPlease, Y/N,â Jungkook begs, looking desperate. âJust one evening. And then if it really goes terribly and you end up hating me again, then we donât have to do another one.â
You sigh, shoulders slumping. Well, what else are you going to do? You donât have any other ideas. And youâve already spent so much time with Jungkook this semester, whatâs another evening? Just something else to cross off of your list of things to film. Maybe you can get him to take a cute photo of you to post on social media.Â
âFine,â you concede. âOne date. And I still hate you, by the way.â
Jungkook clearly does not believe you. âReally? You still hate me? Iâm sure you do.â
âOkay, I donât hate you. But still,â you relent again. Perhaps youâre just being oddly soft today. Too lenient for your own good.Â
Jungkook grins, cheeks little round circles as his lips curve up. âI know you like me. You just canât admit it to yourself, can you? Canât take that blow to your dignity.â
âDonât think so highly of yourself,â you chide.Â
âWho knows?â Jungkook tacks on, just to be extra annoying. âMaybe youâre actually starting to fall in love with me.â
You scoff. âYou wish.â
âWell, are you?â
Jungkook doesnât ask the question the same way heâs asked all of the other ones. Doesnât say it with a shit-eating grin on his face or that glint in his eyes. Heâs asking because heâs curious. Curious if what heâs been doing has been working. Curious if this project is really accomplishing anything at all.Â
Funnily enough, you find yourself wondering the exact same thing.
Silent, you pausing for a moment to think, chewing on the inside of your lip. Jungkookâs looking back at you, lips curled upwards as he waits for a response. Ugh, youâll just have to give it up. What else can you say? âI guessâŠâ you begin, hesitating.Â
You arenât sure why youâre so scared to respond. Maybe youâre just worried that things will change if you say something. If you tell him the truth.Â
But itâs just Jungkook. Heâs sitting in front of you patiently, waiting for your answer. What could happen?
You confess. âI guess youâre not so bad after all.â
Even though this is not the first time youâve ever been out on a âdateâ (youâre using that word tentatively), picking out what to wear isnât any easier than the last time.Â
âIs black too, you know, sexy?â
Ruby shrugs on the other end of the video call. Her phone is propped up on her desk as she works on something on her laptop, glancing over every now and then whenever you prompt her to respond. âWell, that depends. Do you wanna fuck?â
âNo.â
âThen it might be too sexy,â Ruby says easily. âWhat are you even doing? I thought you didnât go out on dates.â
âItâs not a date,â you insist, although youâre not exactly sure which of the two of you youâre trying to convince.Â
âYouâre asking me what kind of sexy dress to wear for a night out with a guy. Itâs a date,â Ruby reminds you, economical as always. âWho are you even going out with, anyway? You just called and asked me to pick between two dresses I have literally never seen you wear before.â
âThatâs because I donât go out on dates, which this is not,â you tell her, even expending the energy to stare into the camera to hammer your point home. âAnd itâs with Jungkook.â
Ruby shuts her laptop at that. You can hear the sound of her keyboard clacking as the lid hits them. âIâm sorry, what?â
âDo I need to remind you that this is not a date and therefore, you donât need to be acting like I just told you Iâm getting married.â You frown at her. âItâs just for our movie. Jungkook wants me to dress nicely, though.â
âWear that nice summer dress you have,â Ruby instructs instead, shooing away the two much sexier options youâre currently holding in your hands. âJust put tights on underneath if youâre cold.â
âThis one?â You ask, shuffling through your closet until you produce the gingham dress, plaid a pale yellow that matches gold jewelry rather well.Â
âYes, that one. I like that one,â Ruby says with a nod. âYou look good in it.â
âI donât know, I feel like itâs not appropriate.â You hesitate. Itâs a cute dress, sure, but it seems too⊠casual. Too everyday. Jungkookâs taking you out to dinner, and no doubt heâs got something else planned for the rest of the evening.Â
âI mean, you did say you had no plans on fucking him tonight,â Ruby reminds you coarsely.Â
âI have no plans on fucking him at all,â you reiterate. âThis is not a date. It is for our movie.â
âYeah, yeah.â Ruby brushes you off with a wave of her hand. âWear whatever you want, but I like your yellow dress the most. It looks really nice on you. And if itâs not a date, then neither you nor Jungkook should care.â
âRubyââ
âI gotta go. Enjoy your not-date!â
She hangs up.Â
You end up wearing the yellow dress. Jungkook knocks on your apartment door just as youâre closing the clasp to your necklace, a gold choker your mother had gifted you for a birthday a couple of years ago. Itâs nothing much. You grab a jacket on your way to answer the door, wrapping it around your figure as you twist the knob.Â
On the other side is Jungkook, all decked out in black jeans and a clean-cut leather jacket, the black ensemble striking against his warm-toned skin and bleached, blonde hair. You hate to admit it, but he actually does look rather good. For Jeon Jungkook.Â
âHiâwhoa,â Jungkook says, doing a little whistle when he sees you, eyes bulging out of their sockets.Â
You chuckle. ââWhoaâ yourself.â
âYou, uhâŠâ Jungkook stammers slightly, a hand coming up to rub at the nape of his neck. The movement lifts his arm up just enough for you to see the line of his waist, the seamlessness of his body. Heâs always been rather fit. âYou look nice.â
âDonât sound so surprised,â you chide, stepping outside and pulling the door shut behind you. âYou donât look half bad yourself.â
âCleaned up just for you.â He grins.Â
You press a hand to your heart dramatically. âIâm touched.â You begin walking down the hallway of your small apartment building, feeling your hands brushing by your sides due to how skinny the corridor is. At least, thatâs what you assume.Â
âWhere are we going?â You ask as Jungkook opens the door to the passenger side of his car for you.Â
He winks, that same gleam in his eye. He grins something wicked. âDonât you remember?â He asks. âItâs a secret.â
The secret turns out to be a small Italian restaurant on an off-road in the center of town, a family joint with those plaid red tablecloths and dark wooden chairs. Youâd never heard of the place before tonight, but Jungkook insists that itâs delicious and says it has a four-and-a-half star rating on Yelp, which is obviously gospel when it comes to restaurants. Itâs so empty that he even has room to prop up the camera a couple of tables away to get that wide-angle shot of the both of you, two souls in a tiny little restaurant, enjoying a night out on the town. Youâre sure that by the time production and post-production rolls around youâll edit out most of your dialogue, but you like the idea of keeping in snippets of the audio, overlaying the scene with a soft instrumental.Â
From a directorâs point of view, of course. No other reason to romanticize your night with him.Â
Itâs nice. Objectively, itâs definitely one of the more exciting things youâve done in a while, even if itâs just a dinner out in town, away from campus. Itâs new. Adventurous. Jungkook convinces you to try his vodka shrimp linguine and you offer up some of your truffle-flavored gnocchi, which he devours happily. One thing you do learn is that no matter how much time passes, no matter how much food is on his plate, Jungkook eats and eats and eats. He never seems to fill up. This is one of those restaurants that pile your bowls high with pasta, give you at least three servings, send you home with to-go packages that will last you for days, and he still somehow manages to eat every last bite. He even has some of your leftovers.Â
Jungkook pays because he insists and says that you shouldnât fight on camera, which you have no choice but to agree to. However, you do look him up on Venmo and send him twenty dollars to cover your half of the bill, because the idea of him paying for you doesnât sit right with you. It was fine with the coffee, a small token of repayment after spilling it all over you, but dinner just feels like too much. Like heâs carrying most of the weight and you arenât shouldering enough. Like heâs putting in all of the effort and you are just bandwagoning off of him.Â
And partnerships arenât supposed to be like that. Jungkook isnât supposed to do all of the work. You arenât supposed to do nothing. You and Jungkook may not agree on much but you both know that you are equals. That what you put in is what you get out.Â
Itâs a lesson you think you learned too late, but you wonât make those mistakes again. Youâll get it right this time.Â
âThat was nice,â Jungkook says after the dinner. Youâre walking through the park just across the street now, the sun having set and the streetlamps illuminating your path. The city has strung up lights along the trees, draped them over the branches like stars, like snowflakes. Itâs picturesque.Â
âYeah.â You nod. âThanks for taking me.â
âThanks for coming.â
âHow did you discover that place?â You ask, just out of curiosity. Itâs not exactly the kind of restaurant that would be front and center on Google.Â
âI went out on a date in freshman year there,â Jungkook admits, lips pursed awkwardly. âYeah.â
âDid it at least go well?â You ask, trying to be hopeful.Â
âIf it did, do you think Iâd still be here doing this with you?â Jungkook poses, an eyebrow raised.Â
You chuckle to yourself. âYou donât mean that. Iâm sure youâll find your person.â
âYou actually believe in that stuff now?â Jungkook asks you, skeptical.Â
âI donât know,â you say, shrugging your shoulders. âYou do. I donât wanna ruin it for you. Your personâs out there somewhere.â
âHow do you know I havenât already found my person?â
You stop in the middle of the path, feet coming to a halt on the pavement. Jungkook looks at you and you look back at him, letting his question sink into your skin, etch itself into your thoughts. Heâs asking you because he wants to know. He looks so genuine, so patient, like heâs trying to find an answer somewhere in your eyes but you canât give him one.Â
âWouldnât you be able to tell when you did?â
Jungkook sighs. âI donât know if it always works like that.â
You smile, soft and small. Musing, you say, âwell, when you figure it out, let me know.â
âDo you think youâve found your person?â Jungkook asks you.Â
âYou know I donât think about love like that,â you remind him.Â
âWell, how do you think about it?â
You gaze up at him once more, that same soft smile playing on your lips. Who is he to be asking you these questions, you wonder to yourself. What would the point be in answering him? Itâs better if you just both moved on. Especially since stuff like this has no relevance to your project.Â
âI donât really think about love at all,â you say curtly.Â
âI wish you did,â admits Jungkook.Â
The look in your eyes is distant. âYeah.â You wish you did, too.
âHow about we do a couple of quick shots, right here?â Jungkook suggests, pulling out the camera. âJust here, the lightingâs nice.â He jogs back a couple of feet, lining himself up with where you stand, kneeling on the pavement with the camera held up to his eye.Â
âWhat do you want me to do?â You call to him, feeling like a fish out of water in front of the lens, thumbs twiddling.Â
âJust smile,â Jungkook requests simply. âSay hi to me.â
Sounds easy enough. Under the twinkling lights of the trees, in the haze of their warm yellow glow, you wave to Jungkook, smiling happily. You arenât exactly sure what the purpose of these shots are, but you suppose you could always use some artistic frames in your movie. Grinning, you keep your eyes trained on him, on the way you can see him smiling back at you even from behind the camera. His eyes are covered, you canât see those, but you hope theyâre smiling too.Â
âOkay, my turn,â you say when a little too much time has passed, when itâs just past the point of filming for the sake of a movie and more for the sake of something else. âGet over here.â
âMe?â
âYes, you idiot.â You scurry over to Jungkook, taking the camera from his hands and pushing in in the general direction of where you were just standing. Situating yourself, you kneel right where Jungkook was, bringing the camera to your eyes.Â
Through the lens, you can see the entire width of the pathway, the grass that borders it, the lights decorating the branches of the trees, and Jungkook, front and center. He looks like he has no idea what heâs doing there, waiting awkwardly as he gazes around, eyes drifting everywhere but exactly where you need them: you. He looks good like this, looks much taller, much more romantic. Like a real movie star. Like a model. His clothes make him blend in with the darkness of the night but his eyes are still shimmering, golden flecks twinkling, even from all the way over here.Â
You have to admit it. Heâs beautiful.
âSmile,â you say, pressing film.Â
Jungkook grins your way.Â
Afterwards, you give him his camera back and continue walking, turning the corner as you reach the edge of the park, ready to circle around the perimeter.
âHow about we hold hands, too?â
âExcuse you?â You say, an eyebrow raised.Â
âCome on, just for a second,â Jungkook pleads. âFor the artistry. Iâll film us holding hands like all those Los Angeles boys do in YouTube vlogs.â
You look at him suspiciously. Is he sure itâs just for the artistry? âWhat a great example.â
âPlease? Promise I always put hand cream on,â Jungkook asks, bottom lip turned outwards.Â
Itâs getting harder and harder to say no to him.Â
âFine,â you cave rather easily this time around. âJust for a minute.â
âExcellent.â
Jungkook lifts the camera up to his eye with his right hand as he holds out his left, palm facing the sky as he waits for you to rest your own in his. You narrow your eyes to the camera before your gaze drifts downwards to his open hand, almost like youâre afraid itâs going to jump out and bite at you if you get any closer. But it wonât, because itâs a hand. And it wonât, because itâs just Jungkook.Â
The first thing you realize when your fingers intertwine with his is how big his hands are. They are massive. His left one dwarfs your own, wrapping around it securely, enveloping it like a king-sized comforter. The second thing you realize is how soft they are (he must not have been lying about the hand cream). The third thing you realize is the way they send sparks up and down your body, send tingles through your skin, shocks through your veins. You seize up a little bit at the feeling before your body finds it in itself to relax, letting the sensation wash over you like a wave from the ocean.Â
Itâs new.Â
Itâs strange.Â
You havenât felt that way in a long time. Felt those sparks, those jolts of energy. Like lightning has struck.Â
Jungkook moves so that your hands are held out in front of you, making sure to adjust the lens just so he can get the exact right angle, but all you can focus on is the way your fingers interlock, the way your hand settles into his.Â
You wonder what that means.Â
The moment Jungkook lowers the camera you pull your hand away, overwhelmed and scared and shocked all at once. Like youâre afraid that if you reach out to him again, your whole body will freeze in place, shake like the wind.Â
Jungkook looks at you, concern lacing his features. âYou alright?â He asks, genuine and worried.Â
You shake your head, willing those thoughts away. âIâm fine, Iâm fine. You get the shot?â
âYeah, I did,â Jungkook says.Â
âAnd how do they look?â You ask because you canât help yourself. Because you just have to know.Â
Jungkook pauses, not sure how to respond. He chews on his lips like heâs running through all the possible answers, trying to figure out which one is right. You almost think heâs not going to reply at all, but then he smiles, and he says this:Â
âMagical.â
It feels weird for you to be arriving at Kim Taehyungâs door without Jungkook by your side. Doesnât sit right in your stomach.Â
Of course, Taehyung is as hospitable as always, welcoming you inside with his signature warm grin as he sets up the bar stools by the bedsheet, which you assume he will just not take down until your projectâs over. Hopefully heâs getting use out of it otherwise, shooting nudes or whatever it is he said he would do.Â
âThanks for having me,â you say, resting your backpack against the foot of his couch as you set up the tripod, arranging it in just the right spot. Itâs not Jungkookâs fancy camera that youâve got with you, just your own from a couple years ago, but itâll get the job done. You couldnât ask Jungkook to borrow his, anyway. Youâd pass away before he found out you did this.Â
âWe might not use this footage,â you warn in advance. âI just figured itâs safer to film everything just in case.â
âWhy wouldnât you use it?â Taehyung asks, genuinely curious.Â
âBecause I donât know if this conversation will really have a point,â you say nervously, fingers fidgeting with the settings until everythingâs just right.Â
âIâm sure itâll be important,â Taehyung assures you. Youâre not so confident. âReady to get started?â
âYes, everythingâs all set up,â you say, concentrating on your breathing as you make your way to the stool. Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. Why are you so worried?
âSo, Y/N, how are you feeling right now?â Taehyung begins.Â
You sigh. âConfused.â
âAnd why is that?â
âI⊠I donât really know what direction Iâm going in anymore for this project,â you say, letting yourself be candid and honest because itâs just Taehyung, and because you may not even use this footage, and because Jungkookâs not here. He doesnât know youâve asked Taehyung to do this for you. He doesnât need to.Â
âAnd is this because of Jungkook?â
âYes.â Another easy answer.Â
âHow are you feeling about him?â
âIâmâŠâ you donât know where to begin. âIâm not sure. I just know that somethingâs changed.â
âYour feelings have changed?â Taehyung isnât reacting, just asking questions in response to your answers and pretending that everything is normal, that this is just another interview.Â
âI guess they have,â you admit. Even just saying that feels like a weight off your chest. A small one, five pounds out of a thousand. But itâs a difference. âI⊠donât really know how I feel about him anymore.â
âIn a good or bad way?â
Taehyung told you he would ask tough questions, but you donât know if you can answer these anymore.Â
âI donât know,â you say, feeling yourself growing desperate with impatience. âI donât feel the same things about him that I used to. Heâs different to me now.â
âDo you think heâs changed?â
âSomething has.â
âHave you considered the possibility that maybe youâve changed, too?â
You frown, caught off-guard by his question. No, you havenât. You havenât thought about that at all. Why would you? Your stance is the same. Your opinions on love havenât changed. And neither have your convictions about this project, about the way it will end.Â
âNo,â you say, nose scrunched up.Â
âWell, Iâm no expert, but I think there might be something between the two of you that wasnât there before,â Taehyung says, nodding. âI think that the ways the two of you have changed have brought you together.â
âI donât know about thatâŠâ You trail off. You can feel yourself growing hesitant again, pulling back from saying too much because youâve never been a very good speaker. Because youâve always preferred being behind the camera to being in front of it.Â
âDonât you think you should tell him how you feel?â
You scoff. At least thatâs got an easy answer. A no-brainer. âNo,â you say matter-of-factly, obvious because it is, stern because telling him was never an option anyway. Why else does Taehyung think youâre here without him? âJungkook said he would get me to fall in love with him and I told him I would never. How could I ever let him think he was actually winning?â
Taehyung sighs.
You havenât seen Jungkook since your class on Wednesday. Granted, itâs only Saturday, but it feels like itâs been a weirdly long time. Like youâre so used to him barging into your life on the daily that thereâs something off about even going three days without seeing him. Maybe itâs just because youâre nearing the beginning of April and your project is finally picking up steam. Between the two of you, you almost definitely have more than two hourâs worth of footage, but the hard part will be paring it down and turning it into a forty-five minute documentary. No doubt you and Jungkook will be spending a lot of time together the week before itâs due.Â
Just out of curiosity, you text him. Because you have no idea what heâs been getting up to.Â
[March 28th, 1:05PM]
You: Hey, do you think we need to get together sometime this weekend?
Jungkook: i donât think i can
Jungkook: itâs my dance groupâs show this weekend
You: Really?
You: You didnât tell me
Jungkook: been too busy
You: What time is your show tonight?
Jungkook: 7pm
You: Sounds good, Iâll be there
Jungkook: oh
Jungkook: you donât have to
You: I want to
You: Iâll see you there!
That night, you drop by the grocery store beforehand to pick up a bouquet of flowers. You havenât been a performing arts show for years now, especially not one where you actually know the people performing, but flowers are customary. Or so youâve heard.Â
You donât know a single soul who has plans on seeing Jungkookâs dance group either, but the theater is a ten-minute walk away from campus and youâre happy to make the trek alone, especially because you know youâll find someone you know soon enough. Sometimes itâs nice to walk by yourself, letting the streetlamps above your head illuminate your path, a faceless figure passing by others. It brings peace. And it gives you time to sift through your thoughts, organize them into neat little piles and brush away all of the dust.Â
Admittedly, you are not much of a connoisseur of the performing arts. You arenât even much of a consumer. In another universe, under different circumstances, you wouldnât blink twice if you heard that one of the dance groups on campus was having their show. But this is not another universe, and these are not different circumstances.Â
Jungkook will be there. He is taking something heâs worked tirelessly on and presenting it to the world. Now that you think about it, itâs actually a lot like film. And if Jungkook has devoted so much time, put so much energy into this performance, what kind of person would you be if you didnât go and watch his creation?
You pick a seat in the far back corner, the venue so cozy that even despite being the furthest away youâve still got an excellent view, sit down, and wait for it to begin.Â
[March 28th, 6:58PM]
Jungkook: hey are you here?
You: I guess youâll just have to wait and see, wonât you?
Jungkook: always such a tease
You roll your eyes at that, turning your phone off and stowing it away in your pocket. Two minutes later, the lights dim.Â
The moment Jungkook steps out onto the stage, you recognize him instantly. Heâs wearing all black again, but itâs not the same skinny jeans and leather jacket he had on when he took you out to dinner. Itâs a loose long-sleeved shirt and sweatpants that hang low on his hips, highlighting the blondeness of his hair, the red in his lips. Heâs one of at least a dozen people on stage but heâs the only one you focus on, the only one who your eyes follow. Booming throughout the theater is a Drake song, the beat thick and low, but itâs background noise when compared to the way he moves, the way he twists and turns his body on stage, angles sharp and crisp.Â
The whole song goes by so quickly that by the time you find it in yourself to blink the stage is already darkening as they move onto the next song, switching out the performers and changing the spotlight colors to a sultry red. Jungkook disappears for this one, vanishing behind the curtains and forcing you to pay attention to the performance as a whole instead of just him. But you have to hand it to his group: theyâre excellent. Youâve been missing out.Â
Jungkook returns with the next song, having had just enough time to change into an all-white ensemble. Heâs easy to spot even with that ridiculous bucket hat on, blonde hair bouncing with every step he takes, every jerk of his body. You can see it all the way from where you sit, see the way he loses himself in the music, lets the rhythm radiate through his blood, lets his heart match the beat that booms through the speakers. This, all of it, the music, the dancing, the energyâitâs all his. It belongs to him. Jungkook may love film but he is passionate about this. It is something that must bring him all the joy in the world.Â
The next hour and a half goes by quickly, the songs jumping from one to another to another, Jungkook dashing on and off stage, each time returning in a different getup than the one prior. Makes you wonder just how many clothes he has. But before you know it the final song is playing and every one, every single member is on stage, jumping and cheering and celebrating a job well done. And they should, because they deserve to.Â
When the lights in the theater come on, nobody leaves. Instead, everyone rushes towards the stage to say hello to everybody, congratulate them on their performance and take pictures with their friends. Thatâs why everyone else is here, isnât it? Because the people they care about performed tonight.Â
Isnât that why youâre here, too?
Jungkook has plenty of other friends already wrapping their arms around him, giving him high-fives and pats on the back, but youâve got a bouquet of assorted flowers in your hands and you have no plans on bringing them home. So you squeeze your way through the crowd, push yourself in between bodies, and you shout,Â
âJungkook!â
Jungkook looks up instantly at the call of his name, the round shape of his lips curving upwards into a smile when he sees you.Â
âHey, you made it!â He exclaims happily. Heâs so pumped on the adrenaline that he pulls you into a hug without either of you even realizing it, wrapping his arms around your torso and squeezing you tight for a few moments before the two of you remember just exactly who you both are. Quickly, you pull away, chuckling awkwardly. Jungkook scratches at the back of his head. âThanks for, uhâthanks for coming.â
âOf course,â you say happily. âYou were amazing.â
âWhat can I say, Iâm a man of many talents,â Jungkook schmoozes, annoying as always.Â
You scoff slightly. âDonât get ahead of yourself. Here, I brought this for you. Itâs traditional, right?â You hold out the bouquet in front of you, pink plastic wrapping crunched up from where your fingers gripped the stems.Â
âWow, thank you,â Jungkook says, in awe as he takes the flowers from you, pressing his face into the petals instinctively. âNo oneâs ever gotten me flowers before.â
âReally?â You say, genuinely surprised at his admission. Heâs never been given flowers before? Not even for a performance? You didnât know that, either. âThen Iâm glad to be the first.â
âYou know you didnât have to do that,â Jungkook says, though he looks grateful nonetheless.Â
You shrug, acting casual. âArenât we supposed to be falling in love, or something?â
He grins.Â
âDid you guys film this? Maybe we could incorporate it into the movie,â you suggest, thinking it might be interesting to add in glimpses into your normal lives, into the things you do when you arenât trying to one-up each other.Â
Jungkook shakes his head. âWe did, but I donât think we need to add it in.â
âWhy not?â It seems like a perfect addition.Â
Jungkook pulls out a single flower from the bouquet, a pale yellow daisy, and hands it to you. You smile your thanks, twirling the stem in between your fingers.Â
âI donât know,â he says, looking oddly soft, cheeks turning cherry red. He looks at you and it makes your heart flutter, quickens the drum of your chest. âI just think Iâd like to keep this moment to ourselves.â
You suppose heâs got a point. You donât think youâll forget this night, either.Â
The bouquet you gave him sits on Jeon Jungkookâs bedroom windowsill, bathing in the afternoon sun. Taehyung gave him some plant food the morning after you came to his performance, a little bottle that he can spritz into the water whenever the flowers look a little droopy. Jungkook adds some every day, determined to keep them alive for as long as possible. He also makes sure heâs got a rather heavy book or two, something he can use to press one of them when theyâve all shriveled up.Â
It was really nice of you to come to his show, he thinks to himself. Jungkook canât remember the last time someone outside of his group of close friends went to see him perform, not any of his past dates or even that one girl he was seeing semi-seriously for a couple months last year until she told him she wasnât interested in him anymore. Youâre the first one whoâs made the effort, whoâs told him that you would come and kept that promise. The flowers are just a happy reminder.Â
As a celebration for completing their last show, Jungkook and some of the other juniors in his dance crew decide to go out the following weekend, determined to waste away their Saturday nights at a bar just off of campus where they can take as many shots of as many different types of alcohols as they want. The place even has soju, which makes Jungkookâs heart happy.Â
Despite the temptation to drink until his brain is empty, however, Jungkook holds off. Heâs got a lot of work tomorrow, most of it consisting of editing the footage you have for the project, and doesnât really feel like staring at a computer for eight hours straight with a headache. So he limits himself. For the most part.Â
âWho was that girl that came to the show?â One of his friends, Andrew, asks as he downs another shot of what is undoubtedly vodka, if the smell is anything to go by. âWith the flowers?â
âIs she your girlfriend?â Jesse pipes up, red in the face from the alcohol in his system. Heâs always been one to turn into a tomato after drinking.Â
Jungkook chuckles awkwardly, shaking his head when the bartender offers him another shot glass full of soju. âNo,â he says, forcing a laugh. âJust a friend.â
âI donât know, you guys looked pretty close to me,â Andrew points out, like it wasnât already obvious enough that Jungkook is head over heels for you.Â
âShe and I are working on a film project together,â Jungkook explains, though that does absolutely nothing to convince his friends of your completely platonic relationship.Â
âSounds fun,â Jesse says, swallowing another shot and wincing. âIt was nice of her to bring you flowers. My girlfriend didnât do that.â
âShut up, your girlfriend is studying abroad in Paris right now,â Andrew says, giving Jesse a good-natured shove. âIâm gonna tell her you said that.â
âWhat, please donâtââ
âSheâs not my girlfriend, guys,â Jungkook repeats himself, feeling his cheeks heat up the longer the conversation drags on. He chalks it up to the soju in his system and the fact that it feels like a sauna in here. âSeriously, weâre just friends. People can be friends and bring each other flowers.â
Jesse pumps his fist in the air. âYeah!â He rounds on Andrew. âWhere are my flowers, hey Andrew?â
The two of them start bickering as Jungkook laughs, shaking his head fondly. At least heâs not drunk, so he can remember nights like these, ones where heâs drinking with his stupid idiot friends, celebrating a show well done.Â
Jungkook stays at the bar until eleven that night before he makes the executive decision to go home and sleep, because as much as he would like to party until three in the morning, heâs got a pile of work thatâs telling him to be a real adult. So he bids his friends goodbye and begins to make the trek back to his apartment, passing by the row of frat houses on his way.Â
Even though heâs out on the sidewalk, Jungkook can feel the ground rumble from the music, every frat on the block joining together to make some booming, bass monster. From here he can see the flashing blue and purple lights in the windows, see the brothers standing on the steps of each house and turning away whoever they deem unfit to enter.Â
In a weird way, it makes Jungkook nostalgic. Reminiscent of when he was a freshman, when he would group up with all of the people in his hall and parade around the frat row on Saturday nights like they owned the place, getting drunk on shitty tequila and jumping until they sweat out their body fluids. He remembers those nights in flashes, bits and pieces that make up his memory of freshman year as a whole. Remembers kissing other girls, other girls kissing him. Remembers the way he would lock lips with them for a second and then forget about it by the next day.Â
Jungkook wonders why he ever thought he would meet his soulmate at a frat party.Â
Heâs just passing the last frat house now, nodding to the guy on the step when they accidentally meet eyes, when he hears you call his name.Â
âJungkook!â
He whips around to see you on the other side of the road, waving at him excitedly while your friends all laugh, sending smiles Jungkookâs way.Â
Jungkook isnât exactly sure what the protocol is for a scenario like this, so he does what he thinks is right and waves back.Â
âCome over here!â You shout at him, loosely gesturing for him to join your group. Jungkook is hesitant, not sure if thatâs necessarily the best course of action because even from here he can tell that youâre drunk, leaning over to one side and giggling at nothing. But even if he isnât sure what will happen he canât help but fall into the way youâre beaming at him, waving excitedly because you saw him on the street and you wanted to say hello.
Heâs never been able to resist you.Â
âHey, what are you doing out here?â He says as he jogs over, greeting the rest of your friends with a patient smile.Â
âWent out with my friends,â you say. Jungkook can smell the alcohol on your lips. âAnd then I saw you, which made me happy!â
You stumble over nothing, shoes skipping as they drag along the pavement, and before any of your friends can react Jungkook is reaching his arms out, catching you before you fall flat on your face. Your hands press against his torso as he lifts you back to your feet, and all Jungkook can do is pray that you canât hear the way his heart races, beat drumming in his ears. You giggle in his hold, disoriented but not at all uneasy, looking up at him as your eyes sparkle in the glow of the streetlamps.Â
âThanks,â you manage to cough out.Â
âSure,â Jungkook says, breathless. He stands you up and tries to let you go, but you keep your hands tight around his wrists. âI think we need to get you home.â
âCan you come with me?â You ask innocently, eyes wide.Â
âY/NâŠâ One of your friends says, voice hesitant. She places a hand on your shoulder, looking concerned. Jungkook doesnât take any offense to it, he doesnât know your friends well and imagines that they would much prefer being the ones to drop you back at your place.Â
You shrug her off. âNo, itâs okay, Ruby,â you assure your friend, hand inching down Jungkookâs wrist until it rests firmly within his palm. âIâll go with him.â
Ruby eyes Jungkook suspiciously and her gaze is so intense that it actually makes him doubt his ability to walk you home for a moment. But you seem intent on walking with him, and the sooner you go home the better, so Ruby relents and lifts her hand from your shoulder. âAlright, if you want to.â She keeps her eyes trained on Jungkook. âText me when youâre back.â
âI will, I will,â you say, brushing her off and waving her away. âLetâs go, Jungkook. Iâm sleepy.â
âOkay, come on,â he says. You smile happily at your friends as you say goodbye, cheerful and drunk and tired, all at once, and you begin to walk towards your apartment.Â
âIâm glad youâre here,â you tell him, positively filter-less.Â
âIâm glad Iâm here, too,â Jungkook assures you. âWhat did you have to drink tonight?â
âNot sure,â you admit happily. âJust a lot.â
âI can tell.â Jungkook nods. âWere you at a frat party?â
âSeveral,â you correct him. âThey werenât that fun but at least the drinks were free.â
âWhy were you at a frat party if you donât like them?â Jungkook asks you, nose scrunched up. You certainly arenât the kind of person to hide your distaste for things. That is something that Jungkook is intimately familiar with.Â
You shrug. âItâs the cheapest place to get drunk.â
âWhy did you want to get drunk?â This is seeming more and more out-of-character for you. Going to a place you despise, taking shots until you canât walk straight, meandering around campus with Jungkook. All of these are things Jungkook could never in a million years picture you doing out of free will.Â
Well, all of them except maybe the last one. You did come to his dance show, after all.Â
You sigh. Itâs thick and heavy and Jungkook has a feeling you wonât want to divulge any more. âI just wanted to forget.â
But the curiosity is eating at him.Â
âForget what?â
Your grip on his hand tightens. Jungkook fully expects you to dodge the question like youâve dodged all of the ones prior, say something else to change the topic so you can sweep this discussion under the rug like all of the other ones youâve had. But you donât.Â
Instead, you say, âYou wanna know why I donât love love the way you do?â
âYou donât have to tell me,â Jungkook quickly assures you.Â
âI had better options than this place,â you say, voice hollow and empty. âThere were better universities that accepted me. Ones with higher-ranked film programs and bigger scholarships. I could have gone to any one of them and been just as happy. Maybe more.â
âBut you didnât,â Jungkook clarifies.Â
âMy ex-boyfriend goes to school ten minutes away from here,â you say, words that are most certainly news to Jungkook. You had a boyfriend? âHe and I dated all throughout high school. I thought I was gonna marry him.â
The words sound so sad. It sounds like they donât even belong to you. Like youâre recalling the memories of a different person, someone youâve killed and buried, someone you were certain you would never have to face again. Yourself. Your past self.Â
âAnd then he broke up with me at the beginning of last year and it was too late to transfer out.â Your words are slurred and garbled, like all you want is to get over with saying them in the first place. Itâs not a dramatic revelation. Itâs not something youâre crying about, sobbing into Jungkookâs chest as you remember, miserable, a time where you were once happy. You just sound lifeless.Â
Jungkook blinks at you expectantly, waiting for you to continue. It doesnât feel right for him to speak up. Not when youâve just revealed to him something so personal, so drunk that you probably wonât even remember saying anything when you wake up tomorrow morning.Â
What is he supposed to do with this knowledge? What is he supposed to say? To do? Itâs not like Jungkook can change your past. Itâs not even as if he can change the near future. Your project is almost finishedâthe semester is almost over. And then you will return to the time where you never even knew each other.Â
âYou can say something,â you tell him.
âWhat do you want me to say?â Jungkook says.Â
ïżœïżœSomething to make me feel better, because now Iâm sad,â you request simply. âSeeing you made me happy.â
âMaybe I should just keep my mouth shut and smile, then,â he muses to himself.Â
âNo, please keep talking,â you plead, leaning into his body with your bottom lip puffed out, eyes big and round and desperate. âListening to you gets me to stop thinking about this stuff.â
Hearing that, Jungkook says the first thing that comes to mind. And that is, âYou donât have to think about that stuff anymore at all.â
âHmm?â You murmur into his chest. Jungkook sees your apartment building up ahead. Just another block or so.Â
âWell, that was your old love story,â he begins tentatively. Jungkookâs almost fully sober by now but he feels like he wonât ever get another opportunity to say this, and maybe whatever soju is left in his system is enough to get him through this conversation. Enough for him to muster up the confidence to tell you what heâs been wanting to tell you for a while now.Â
Even if you forget it by tomorrow. He knows this is his only chance.Â
âAnd it didnât have a happy ending, but thatâs okay. Because ours will.âÂ
Youâre just coming up to your apartment complex, the rusted gold doors of the entrance sticking out against the beige of the building and the sidewalk, shimmering in the light of the streetlamps. You pause right outside, taking cover underneath the red awning above your heads. Looking up at him, you blink expectantly.Â
âHow do I know you mean that?â You ask.Â
He almost does it.Â
Jungkook doesnât really know what washes over him in that moment, what takes his heart and mind prisoner for a split second, grip tight and unforgiving. But heâs staring straight into your watery eyes, glossy and glimmery and glowing, lost in the way you press your lips together, the way you gaze up at him and wait for him to tell you what heâs always wanted to say, and he almost does it. His hands press at your sides, holding you close, like heâs afraid that if he lets you go youâll vanish without another trace and this night will all have been for naught.Â
But he doesnât.Â
He doesnât for a lot of reasons. Youâre drunk. When you wake up tomorrow, you will not remember this conversation. But Jungkook will. And if he does it, if he kisses you, if he presses his lips to yours it will be burned into his thoughts, carved into his heart, and you will be none the wiser. Jungkook canât do that to himself. And he canât do that to you, either. He will never take advantage of your company. He never has.
âBecause,â Jungkook says instead, having hesitated for far too long. âI promise you.â
Itâs good enough for him.Â
He tucks you into bed at 12:17AM that night, feet padding along your hardwood floor so he doesnât wake up your neighbors, guiding you to your bedroom and reminding you to text Ruby that you made it home safely. Jungkookâs never gotten a very good look at your place, and even now itâs hard to make out most things without the main ceiling lights on, but he doesnât really want to snoop. Even though you invited him in, he still feels like heâs intruding. Youâve always been so private. There were a lot of things said tonight that Jungkook is going to have to reckon with.Â
Once youâre curled up beneath your sheets, eyes drooping, Jungkooks turns off the light on your nightstand and nearly, just about nearly, presses his lips to your forehead. He manages to avoid doing that, too.Â
Instead, he pulls up your duvet and heads towards the main room, making a beeline for your front door. But before he can leave the room, he hears you mumble out his name.Â
âJungkook?â You call, voice groggy.Â
âYeah?â He looks back at you from where he stands in your door frame, one hand on the knob, ready to pull it closed.Â
You smile, eyes fluttering. âThank you,â you say.Â
Jungkook grins.Â
The next morning you wake up with a pounding headache and three missed calls from Ruby, which undoubtedly means that something positively terrible happened last night. Unfortunately, you have no idea what happened at all last night, good or terrible, so whatever Ruby has to say will be news to you.Â
Rubbing your eyes as you wrack your brain in the hopes of figuring out how you even ended up back at your apartment (when you swear you told Ruby you would stay at hers), you press on Rubyâs contact and call her.Â
âY/N? Hello? Are you there?â Ruby answers on the first ring.Â
âIâm here,â you mumble out, words jumped and barely intelligible. You wince as your eyes adjust to the harsh blue light of your phone screen, squinting as you look at the time.Â
Shit, itâs 11:43AM and youâre meeting Jungkook for coffee at noon.Â
âGood, I called you three times last night after you texted,â Ruby wastes no time diving into her interrogation.Â
âWhy?â You ask, scrambling out of bed with your phone pressed between your shoulder and your ear. Your head throbs so you quickly take some Ibuprofen, splash your face with water, and start looking for something clean you can put on.Â
âBecause texting me âhomeâ is not enough!â Ruby exclaims. âJungkook walked you home last night, I wanted to make sure you were tucked in bed and feeling alright.â
You frown. You donât remember that. Granted, you donât remember a lot of things, but you canât recall Jungkook walking you back. You saw him last night? You didnât even know. Scratching your head, a part of you vaguely pictures him standing in your apartment in the dark, resting against the door frame to your bedroom in the warm yellow light of the lamp on your nightstand. Can just barely see him tucking you into bed, placing the sheets over your figure and making you text Ruby that youâre home. You thought you were just imagining it at the time, but it must have happened anyway.Â
âJungkook walked me home?â
âYeah, you insisted,â Ruby says. âYou probably donât remember, though.â
âNo,â you say dumbly.Â
âWell, I appreciate you texting me that you were home but I would have preferred something more explanatory,â scolds Ruby. âI thought maybe Jungkook was gonna do something.â
âOh my goodness, no,â you immediately interject, pulling on your shoes and stuffing your laptop into your backpack. Just the thought of Jungkook doing something like that sends your stomach for a whirl. âHe would never do that. I trust him.â
âI mean, I see that now,â Ruby points out. âI just wanted to make sure you were okay.â
âIâm fine,â you promise. âEverythingâs good.â
âAlright, if you say so,â Ruby says, still sounding a bit like an overprotective mother. You love her, though. You know she just wants the best for you. âTake it easy today, okay? You had a lot to drink last night.â
âI will,â you assure her. âIâm just on my way to meet up with Jungkook now. Getting coffee.â
âMake sure to eat, too,â Ruby reminds you. âAnd tell Jungkook that I said thanks for walking you home.â
âAnything else, Mom?â
You can practically see Ruby frowning on the other end. âOh, shut up. Iâll see you, okay?â
She bids you goodbye just as youâre dashing out the door, your usual stride quickening so you make it to the cafe in time, not wanting to keep Jungkook waiting. You make it there in a record five minutes, pulling open the door frantically just as the clock strikes noon.Â
Jungkookâs already there, of course, sitting by a little round table in the corner of the room with two americanos on the table. He waves when he sees you standing by the entrance, and the mere sight of him makes you smile, shoulders relaxing.Â
âHey,â you greet, a little out of breath as you settle into the chair across from him.Â
âHey,â Jungkook says back. âHow are you feeling?â
âMy head is killing me, but other than that Iâm alright,â you admit, taking a sip of the drink. Itâs piping hot but just the right amount of scalding, warming your insides after a night of filling them with pure poison.Â
âGood.â He grins. âItâs nice to see your face.â
âOh, yeah, speaking of which,â you say while still on the topic, âdid you walk me home last night? I canât remember.â
Jungkook nods. âYeah, I bumped into you and your friends while I was on my way back from a bar.â
You wince. The fact that you donât even remember that happening tells you enough. âI was super drunk, wasnât I?â
Jungkook, nice as always, says, âIâve seen worse.â It only makes you feel the slightest bit better.Â
âHope I didnât say anything embarrassing,â you say, knowing you have a tendency to lose your filter almost entirely when you get wasted, letting any sort of mental reasoning fly out the door the moment you down another shot. And the thought of having told Jungkook something deeply humiliating or personal, or even him witnessing something stupid, makes you feel weirdly exposed.Â
Jungkook freezes for a split second, almost like heâs buffering, like heâs about to say something but itâs just taking him an extra step to get the words out of his mouth. Then he takes a quick sip of his americano and shakes his head. âNo, you didnât. You were just very drunk. And clingy.â
âIâm so sorry you had to deal with that,â you apologize. You canât imagine the hell you must have put Jungkook through last night.Â
Jungkook laughs. âItâs okay. Iâm glad we got you home safe.â
âMe, too.â You nod. You send a grateful smile his way. âThanks for walking me, by the way. I really appreciate it. Ruby says thanks, too.â
âAnytime,â Jungkook says. It doesnât sound like something that people say just to say it. The way that people say âanytimeâ just so they can be friendly and amicable. He says it and he means it, says it genuinely and honestly, like itâs a real promise that heâs making. That he would be happy to walk you home again. No matter the hour. No matter how drunk you are. No matter what heâs doing.Â
And that means a lot to you.Â
âWe should probably wrap up filming soon, huh?â You say, getting onto the topic at hand. Of course, the project is the whole reason youâre even talking to each other in the first place. âItâs due in three weeks.â
âYeah, I was thinking of another outing? And maybe one more thing with Taehyung?â Jungkook suggests.Â
You narrow your eyes suspiciously. ââAnother outingâ, Jungkook? What exactly do you have in mind?â
He grins.Â
This time, Jungkook is the one with the flowers.Â
When you open your front door theyâre the first thing you see, an enormous bouquet of an assortment of spring flowers in a variety of colorsâpinks and purples and oranges and yellowsâgripped neatly in Jungkookâs hand. They stick out against his otherwise rather formal attire, a simple black dress shirt and jeans, nice shoes that compliment his figure. Black truly is the worldâs most slimming color, and Jungkook is no exception. He looks good.Â
âFor you, mâlady,â Jungkook says dramatically as he holds out the bouquet in front of him.
âHow thoughtful of you,â you muse to yourself, grinning. You take the flowers and press your whole face into them, breathing in the fresh scent. âThe one I gave you wasnât nearly this big.â
âGo big or go home,â Jungkook teases. âYou look nice, by the way.â
âYou always sound so surprised when you say that,â you comment snidely, shaking your head as you grab your bag from the shelf next to your door. âWhat are we doing tonight, Jeon? Gonna keep it a secret from me like last time?â
âThat depends,â Jungkook says knowingly. âDo you like secrets?â
âYou should know what I like by now,â you remark.Â
âThen prepare to be wowed.â He grins, taking your hand in his as he pulls you out the door.Â
The restaurant you go to this time does not require a ten minute drive to the center of town. Instead, itâs a five minute walk from campus and actually happens to be a place youâve been to before. Itâs a busy little thing on a Friday night, waiters bustling about with trays in their hands, people laughing and smiling under the dim light of the chandeliers. Youâve only been here once, long ago, for a club dinner paid for by the finance chair, and for good reason. Itâs not the kind of place cheap college students looking to get the most food for the least amount of money go to.Â
âIsnât this a bit out of budget for our rom-com?â You ask as the host seats you at your table, a little booth in the middle of the restaurant, lanterns resting on the corners of the seats.Â
âI thought this was a mockumentary,â Jungkook jokes.Â
âYeah, yeah,â you say, resisting the smile that fights its way across your face. Trust you to make that sort of blunder in front of him. âI mean it, though. This place is expensive.â
âItâs manageable,â Jungkook promises. âIâve been saving up. Plus, I thought you deserved a nice night out.â
âHow generous of you.â
âOh, come on, I know youâre excited,â he narrows his eyes at you. âYou donât have to act like a stone-cold robot anymore.â
âWellâŠâ you suppose enough is enough. Jungkook can see right through you anyway, so thereâs no point in keeping up this indifferent facade of yours. âOnly because youâre treating me so nicely.â
âJust please donât order the steak,â he requests simply.Â
You laugh. âNo problem. Maybe we could just share a couple of appetizers?â
Jungkook likes the sound of that.Â
Luckily, this is not one of those restaurants where the appetizers cost an arm and a leg and are the size of your pinky finger. You and Jungkook split three different ones, happy to scoop out portions for each of you and indulge in them together.Â
Dinner datesâof which this is only sort of oneâare always awkward because you spend half of the time shoving food into your mouth, but you and Jungkook donât seem to mind the silence at all. Only, Jungkook does look sort of like heâs holding back.
âIs this enough food for you?â You ask him halfway through, distantly remembering how he absolutely devoured a whole plate of pasta last time and still having enough room in his stomach to finish yours.Â
âWhat do you mean?â Jungkook asks over a mouthful of vegetables.Â
âYou ate so much at the Italian place, I just want to make sure you arenât still hungry,â you point out.Â
âOh.â Jungkook pauses, swallowing down the bite in his mouth. âNo, Iâm okay. Thanks for thinking of me, though.â
âYeah, of course,â you say. You hesitate for a moment, not sure if you should say anything else. But what the hell, right? Itâs Jungkook. Itâs Jungkook and he walked you home when you were drunk, he gave you flowers, he let you borrow his jacket. And you feel as though you must return the favor. âAnytime.â
He smiles.Â
Despite the pure ecstasy you both experience when eating delicious food, Jungkook makes sure not to waste this time and grabs a few frames of you eating with his camera. He always seems to have that with him whenever heâs with you, hanging around his neck or stuffed into his backpack or crammed into his pants pocket. Sort of makes you wonder just how much footage the two of you have of each other.Â
He insists on paying but you send him some money anyway, just because letting him shoulder the burden of a place as expensive (for college students, at least) as this just doesnât sit right with you. Whenever he receives the Venmo notification on his phone, Jungkook frowns and says that heâll send that money back to you, but he never does and you can tell that he really does appreciate it.Â
You donât think you have any plans on stopping that for a while.Â
The only downside of going to this restaurant is that there is no gorgeous, light-strung park in the vicinity the two of you can wander around. Just your campus, which you have no doubt walked a thousand times over, and the streets surrounding it, which you have memorized like the back of your hand.Â
It almost makes you think that Jungkook is just going to drop you back off at your place and the night will end there, but you know better than to expect something like that from Jungkook. Instead, as youâre walking, you point out the cafe that you and Ruby always go to, see that itâs closing in half-an-hour, and Jungkook decides then and there that itâs your next destination.Â
âYouâve never been here before?â You ask when you walk inside, eyes immediately drifting to the display of pastries beside the register.Â
âIâm not normally on this side of campus,â Jungkook admits. âYouâre the only reason Iâm ever here.â
âThen hopefully after finding this place, youâll have two reasons,â you say cheerfully. The baristas behind the counter know you on a first-name basis, are happy to help you out even though theyâve no doubt been working long hours and are ready to close up shop and go home.Â
You split a tiramisu and sit at that same corner table you and Ruby always pick, empty now that itâs so late at night. Other than the employees, you and Jungkook are the only ones in here, a far cry from the hustle and bustle of the restaurant, filled to the brim with people, the smell of cooked food wafting through the air.Â
 The tiramisu isn't as fresh as it would be bright and early in the morning, but you suppose that that just means you and Jungkook will have to come back. Besides, Jungkook obviously does not seem to mind, scarfing it down ruthlessly. Youâre in and out just as they close up shop, the employees bidding you goodbye like old friends, sending you on your way. Thereâs not really much else either of you have planned for tonight, and Jungkook isnât coming up with any new ideas as he checks his phone. Instead, you just begin to head back to your apartment, all wrapped up in each other. You place your hand in his own and feel yourself relax when he squeezes, a silent little reminder that heâs still here, and that so are you.
Funnily enough, holding hands feels natural to you at this point.Â
âTonight was fun,â you comment, breaking the quiet.
âYeah, glad we could do this,â Jungkook agrees. âMakes me kind of sad to know that this thing is almost over.â
âWhat, the project?â
Jungkook shrugs. âYeah. And the class. And the semester. Itâs kind of scary. Weâll be seniors next year.â
You chuckle. âUgh, donât remind me. I still have no idea what Iâm going to do after we graduate.â
âYou donât have to know everything,â Jungkook reassures you. âAs long as youâre happy with what you have now.â
âAre you?â You inquire, looking up to meet his eyes.Â
Jungkook beams down at you. âI am.â
The walk from the cafe to your apartment is short, just under five minutes, but it feels like it takes you an hour, footsteps slow and languid, like neither of you want the night to end. You hit every red light, round every corner, drawing out the evening for as long as you can. Unfortunately, there is only so much you can do on a five-minute walk, and before you know it, youâre home.
âThis is me,â you say, stopping outside the gold doors of your apartment complex. âThanks again for tonight.â
âAnytime,â Jungkook says, a common thread in your conversations.Â
âReally?â You ask, skeptical. âOur projectâs almost over.â
âThat doesnât mean we have to stop doing this,â Jungkook says.Â
You narrow your eyes. âWhat are you implying, huh, Jungkook?â
âThis.â
Before you know it, heâs wrapping one hand around your waist and pulling you in close to him, your palms splayed out against his broad, toned chest, pressing his lips to yours. You gasp a little into the feeling, somewhat shocked he would dare be so bold even after all this time, but find yourself sinking into the touch. He tastes like coffee and cream, like peppermint from his chapstick, like the wine you shared tonight. You cave into the way he holds you, hands wrapped around your body, palms pressed firmly against your figure. He holds you like heâs afraid to let go, like heâs trying to remind himself that youâre real and here and that you are kissing him back, like heâll forget once the moment ends.Â
But he need not worry about that.Â
When you part, you donât even bother wiping off the stupid smile on your face, kiss-drunk and filled with glee. Itâs been a long time since you felt this way. And Jungkook makes you feel things you donât even think you can explain.Â
âHow bold of you,â you comment, noses touching, barely an inch away from each other.Â
âI figured Iâd shoot my shot,â Jungkook says. He shrugs, pretending to be casual, but you can see the way heâs grinning, beaming, down at you.Â
âYou scored,â you remind him.
âHow observant of you,â teases Jungkook in return. You pout a little at his playful mockery, heart fond. âThink we can do it again?â
âHmm, I would tone down the ego first,â you say, already leaning back in to press your lips against his.Â
âNever.â He smiles wickedly.Â
Itâs a quicker kiss this time, a short peck against his cherry red mouth, but it still makes your heart beat something terribly fierce.Â
âSee you soon?â You ask when you finally pull away, knowing that as much as youâd like to, you canât just stand out here kissing each other forever.Â
Jungkook nods, cheeks pink and warm to the touch. He looks so sleek in his formal black outfit, crisp button-down and slacks, hair all styled, but the way heâs grinning at you makes him look so young, so sublimely happy. Itâs nice.Â
âAnytime.â
âThereâs my favorite couple!â Taehyung greets excitedly when he swings open the door to his apartment to reveal you and Jungkook standing on the other side.Â
âWhatâs it to you?â You comment snidely as he lets you inside, the black sheet still taped up along his wall. It looks a little more wrinkled than when you last saw it.Â
âOh, nothing,â Taehyung singsongs. He definitely knows a lot more than he cares to tell either you or Jungkook, but whatever. The projectâs almost over and heâs almost finished with university entirely. âYou guys are just cute together, thatâs all.â
âLike you even know the half of it.â You tell him with a roll of your eyes.Â
Taehyung wiggles his eyebrows. âOoh, do tell.â He grins that greasy, comic-book-villain grin of his as he starts moving his bar stools back to where the sheet lines his cream-colored wall.Â
âIsnât that the whole point of this?â Jungkook poses, making you laugh from where youâre seated on the couch, watching Jungkook set up his tripod in exactly the place he wants it. You smile at him as you recline against Taehyungâs poor old leather couch, so worn-down from use that the back cushions fold in when you press against them, and Jungkook peers out from behind the camera to blow you a kiss.Â
You send him one back without even needing to think.Â
Taehyung misses the whole scene, but no doubt heâll be putting two and two together pretty soon. You and Jungkook agreed that for the last interview you would be questioned together, long before Jungkook actually managed to romance you off your feet, and thereâs not a doubt in your mind that the two of you being interviewed side-by-side will make things much more interesting.Â
Nevertheless, Jungkook sets up the camera and sends a thumbs-up your way when heâs ready, Taehyung sitting on the bar stool just outside of the frame with a couple of index cards in his hand.Â
âLetâs do this,â you say, hauling yourself onto the seat. Jungkook does the same shortly after, scooching onto the one next to you as you stare at Taehyung, waiting for him to start.Â
âLooking forward to this one?â Taehyung asks knowingly.Â
You shrug nonchalantly. âJust a little.â
âExcellent. Shall we begin?â
You and Jungkook nod.Â
âAlright. Well, this is presumably the last thing the two of you will be filming for your project. How are you feeling about it?â
âIt turned out better than I thought it would,â you admit. It will come as a shock to no one that you did not have very high hopes for this project when it was first assigned.Â
âOf course it did, Iâm your partner,â Jungkook teases, poking you in your side. âWould you ever doubt me?â
âAlways,â you say.
Taehyung chuckles. âSounds like itâs been good so far. Did you enjoy filming it?â
You nod. âYeah, it was actually kind of fun. Except for when Jungkook spilled coffee all over me, that was not cool.â You turn to face Jungkook directly, and all he does when you say his name is wink and point at you.Â
âIt was for the rom-com, I donât know what you expected,â Jungkook said. âI gave you my jacket, too.â
âHow gentlemanly.â
Taehyung chuckles, warm and low. âIâm sure Jungkook learned his lesson,â he muses. âWhat was your favorite thing to film?â
Not when I randomly texted you five minutes before I showed up at your door to make you ask me questions about how I feel, you think to yourself. Jungkook still doesnât know, but you think youâll put it into the movie just for the hell of it, so heâll find out then. Find out that you were grappling with your feelings for him long before you ever let on.
âThe serenade was a blast, a special shoutout to the Eighth Notes for doing that for me,â Jungkook says immediately. Obviously that is at the top of his list. âPlus, I just like seeing Y/N all flustered.â
âShut up, youâre so annoying,â you chide. âI guess the serenade was kind of cute. I liked going out together, though. On our not-date.â
Jungkook objects to that instantly. âIt was a date, Y/N!â
You look back at him, equally as scandalized as he. âWhose turn is it to talk?â
âMine, actually,â Taehyung interjects. âDid you like going out together?â
You sigh a little, wondering if youâre really about to turn into a softie in front of a camera for a movie to be shown to your twenty classmates and professor. âYeah,â you say, real and true because thatâs what you agreed on, you and Jungkook. To be candid. To be honest. To say how you felt. Really. âIt was really nice. I hadnât gone out with someone like that in a long time.â
âAnd were you happy because of the project, or because of Jungkook?â
âWell,â you begin, not exactly sure where to start. âI guess, itâs like⊠you know, I didnât even know Jungkook before this project. I mean, I knew who he was, he would always respond to my discussion board posts and object to everything I said in class. But I didnât know him as a person. But as we worked on this project together, planning and filming and editing, I started to. And we did so many things together. And I guess I just really enjoyed the time we did spend as a pair.â
âWould you say the same, Jungkook?â
âYes,â Jungkook says easily. âThatâs what I wanted. To get to know Y/N, to spend time with her. I was glad we had this project. Otherwise, we might never have done something like this.â
âYou both seem very happy.â
âI think we are. This project was actually sort of a blessing in disguise. I know him a lot better, now,â you say. âIâm glad that I do. He makes me smile, and laugh, and I always feel happy when heâs around. I donât know. He did it, somehow.â
âJungkook?â
âIt wasnât just me. Y/N and I did this together. We made this. This project. Us. It wasnât just her, or just me. Itâs ours.â Jungkook grins.
âAre you glad you did this project?â
Of course. It was fun, and I liked filming it, and I feel like I got something really important out of it. I know itâs just a short rom-com mockumentary, but it really feels like there was a happy ending, you know? A happily ever after.â
âYou seem really certain about that.â
âWell,â Jungkook says with a little scoff, âwhat else would you call it?â
âAs you can see, obviously Y/N fell head over heels in love with me thanks to this wonderful projectââ
âWhy are you always so full of yourselfâ?â
âHey, youâre ruining the voiceover! As I said, as you can see, Y/N fell head over heels in love with me, but that wasnât just because of my dashing good looks and amazing singing skills.â
âThe ends of your hair look like hayââ
âIt was because we were honest with each other, and because we spent meaningful moments together, and because we kept our hearts open. And I guess thatâs the truth of it all, isnât it? Love, romance, relationships? If you close yourself off, youâll never get to experience them. But if you take every opportunity with an open mind, then you never know what might happen. Like falling in love with your discussion board nemesis.â
âWho, me?â
âJust let me finish, come on. Thereâs like one paragraph left. I know this was a mockumentary, not a scripted rom-com with professional actors and screenwriters and a whole team of editors. But that was the whole point. To make it real. And to make it between two people who arenât just characters on a screen. Weâre real people, and this happened to us. And it makes us happy. And it can happen to you, too. I think we all learn something every time we watch a new movie. Whether it be about loss, or promises, or other people. This time, we learned about love. Real love. How it can be rocky and strange and come straight out of left field. But also how happy endings arenât just for movies and fairytales. We all deserve them. And Y/N and I found our own.â
âAre you gonna say it?â
âAnd so⊠they lived happily ever after.â
You look up at the screen, expecting to see the credits roll, but instead itâs a shot of the two of you kissing outside of your apartment building, a shot of you wrapping your arms around him as you press your lips to his. It lasts for only a few seconds, but you find yourself entranced in the moment, shocked that Jungkook somehow managed to capture it on film. He didnât even have his camera with him that night.Â
Pollack turns on the lights in your classroom as your fellow classmates applaud, all of them looking genuinely pleased that your rom-com had such a wonderful ending. Pollack herself looks rather proud, nodding to herself as she smiles at the two of you.Â
âYou filmed us kissing?â You hiss to Jungkook as your classmates clap, hoping the sound of it will drown out your conversation.Â
âI got Taehyung to,â Jungkook whispers back. âWhy?â
âI just⊠I thought that night was just for us.â
âThe rest of it is. But I thought the kiss would be a cute way to end it. You know, happy ending and everything.â
Alright, if Jungkook insists. You nod, tensing up slightly. You hadnât even noticed Taehyung down the street, standing behind some utility pole with the camera raised to his eye. Had Jungkook texted him in secret? Asked him to meet you outside of your apartment? Was he planning on kissing you from the very beginning?
You shake your head, willing away the thoughts as Pollack commends the two of you for a job well done. Jungkook and you stand at the front of the room for a few more seconds, getting stared down by your fellow classmates while Pollack speaks. The period ends just as she finishes up, the minutes changing the moment she closes her mouth. Within a minute or so, the whole class has emptied out, some of them congratulating you and Jungkook on the way out.Â
âIâll meet you outside, okay?â Jungkook says, eyes bright and filled with that same wonder heâs always got.Â
âYeah,â you say distantly, nodding to him as he disappears out the door.Â
âYou did an excellent job, Y/N,â Pollack praises, and it goes right to your head, if youâre being honest. âIt was brilliant.â
âThanks,â you say, suddenly rather shy. âThat means a lot.â
âDonât tell anyone else this,â she says, voice quiet, âbut I was secretly hoping the two of you would fall in love.â
âPollack!â
She laughs. âWhat? I thought youâd make a cute couple. And you do, so clearly it all worked out anyway.â
âIâm pretty sure thatâs against the code of conduct,â you say, even though you know you canât be too mad at her. After all, you wouldnât have Jungkook if it werenât for her.Â
âY/N, Iâm tenured. I donât care.â
âWaitâŠâ you pause, eyes narrowing, âhow many of your students have you set up with each other?â
Pollack grins. âI never reveal my secrets.â
Your mouth drops open.Â
She chuckles, shooing you out the door. âGo on, go be with your boyfriend. You can tell him you both get A pluses for your project. It was excellent. One of the best Iâve seen in a very long time.â
âThanks, Pollack,â you say, smiling gratefully. âYouâre the best.â
She points at you proudly as you head out the door. âSo are you.â
Jungkook is waiting by the tables where you always sit, half a flight down from your classroom. Heâs leaning against the edge of them as he scrolls mindlessly through his phone, so engrossed in the Instagram explore page that he doesnât see you walk up.Â
âGuess what,â you say, getting all up in his face, just because you can.Â
âWhat,â Jungkook says, an eyebrow raised.Â
âWe got an A plus on our project!â You exclaim happily, cheering. Jungkook laughs at your exuberant reaction, watches as you jump around, clapping loudly.Â
âHell yeah, we did that!â Jungkook holds his hand up for a high five, one you gladly take. Your palms smack together and the sound reverberates around the hallway.Â
âYou know, you and Iââ you begin, placing your palms on his cheeks as you pull yourself in for a kiss, âwe make a pretty good team.â
âOnly because youâre so good at editing,â Jungkook says. Youâre both not too bad, if you do say so yourself, but since Jungkook did so much of the filming you thought it would be better if you carried more of the weight when it came to post-production.Â
âSays you,â you tease, pressing your lips to his button nose. âThe happy ending thing was a nice touch, I liked it. Makes me feel like Iâm in a fairy tale.â
âIâm glad,â Jungkook says with a chuckle, admiring the way you beam at him. âYou know, I was really worried that you might think we didnât have a happy ending after all, especially after everything.â
âWhat do you mean?â You look at him curiously.Â
âWell, I just really wanted to make sure that we had a happy ending, because youâve been through so much.â
You pause in place, eyebrows furrowing as you look up at him. Been through so much? Does Jungkook know something you donât? Wait, no, did you⊠did you tell himâ?
âYou knew?â You ask, the realization piercing you like an arrow. âAll this time, and you never said anything?â
Jungkookâs eyes widen.Â
âHow long have you known?â
He winces. âSince I walked you home when you were drunk. You told me.â
You did?
Shit.
âAnd you didnât think that maybe you should have told me that you knew? Especially when I asked you if I had said anything embarrassing?â You cry out, indignant. âWhat, were you just planning on never telling me?â
âI was going to, but I wasnât sure if you wanted to know that you had admitted all those things to me,â Jungkook admits, growing desperate. âThey were really personal things, I thought you might react badly.â
âOh, so you just decided to keep it a secret instead? Look how well that worked out.â
âWhat was I supposed to do, Y/N? I know you would have been upset.â
âTell me!â You exclaim. âI asked you if I had said something embarrassing that night and you said I hadnât. And I believed you. Better to have known then than now!â
âIâm sorry,â Jungkook says.
âI canât believe you wouldnât just tell me. Didnât we say we would be honest with each other? But instead, you just let me assume that all of the nice things you did for me were because you actually cared, and not because you felt bad for me?â
âI donât feel bad for you!â Jungkook shouts. âI mean, I do, but thatâs not why I took you out on dates and gave you flowers and held your hand. I do care about you.â
âOh, so filming us kissing was just because you actually cared, too, right?â
âI donât know why youâre so hung up about that,â Jungkook points out.Â
âBecause I thought it was a private moment,â you remind him. âYou hadnât filmed anything the whole night. I thought we were just going out on a date like two people who cared about each other did. Us kissing was personal. But you texted Taehyung and told him to show up with his camera anyway, right? Because you were planning on kissing me from the very beginning. Because you knew, Jungkook. You knew and you had absolutely no intention of telling me.â
âY/N, wait, I didnât do those things just because I pitied you,â Jungkook says, reaching out for your hand.Â
You pull away. âYou didnât? Then why did you film us kissing, then?â
âBecauseâŠâ he flounders. You arenât at all surprised. âBecauseââ
âEnough, Jungkook. I get it,â you stop him, shaking your head. âEverything weâve done since that first date we had, when we went to the Italian place, everything since thenâit was all played up. Because you felt bad for me. I had a shitty experience with love and you wanted to make me feel better. Whatever.â
âY/N, it wasnât like that,â Jungkook chases after you as you begin to walk down the stairs, towards the exit. âI didnât pity you. I still donât. I did those things because I care about you, and I wanted you to be happy.â
âWell, you got what you wanted,â you say, arms crossed over your shoulders as you push your way out the door. âI was so happy when I was with you.â
âWait, Y/Nââ
âBye, Jungkook.â
The door slams shut behind you.Â
âHow many finals do you still have left? You finished your movie, right?â
Ruby is stirring herself a cup of earl grey tea as she sits down on the couch next to you, where youâre very obviously sulking as you scroll through the Feel Good Rom-Coms category on Netflix.Â
âI just have a couple essays and a presentation,â you mumble out. âYou?â
âUgh, I still have all of my final exams to take,â Ruby tells you with a thick, heavy sigh. Clearly, she doesn't feel like talking about them now. Or at all. âThe life of a biology major.â
âHey, youâre the one who wants to be a doctor, not me,â you remind her crudely. âYou better know your shit, or Iâm never taking my kids to your practice.â
âRude,â Ruby says. âThere goes my family and friends discount offer.â
You laugh to yourself, a small smile inching its way across your lips. Rubyâs always known how to brighten your day, even when you feel like absolute shit.Â
âWhat are we watching, hmm? Iâm cool with anything.â
âI donât know.â You shrug, flicking through all of the rom-com options and feeling very unhappy with all of them. âI feel like youâve seen all of these.â
âYeah,â Ruby says. âWhenever Iâm not studying, Iâm watching Netflix or The Bachelor.â
You nod. Maybe youâll just settle on some old NCIS reruns and call it a night.Â
âOh!â Ruby exclaims suddenly, a lightbulb going off above her head. âHow about we watch your movie? The rom-com you did with Jungkook! I havenât seen it yet.â
âI donât knowâŠâ You begin, the mere thought putting a bad taste in your mouth. For obvious reasons.Â
âCome on, please? I really want to see it, you were so excited about it,â Ruby begs, getting all antsy as she climbs all over you, literally pulling your arm to get you to cave in. âItâs short, too, isnât it? Like forty-five minutes long? We can watch whatever you want afterwards. Please.â
You huff out a breath. If it were up to you, you would move that film onto a flash drive and toss it into a dumpster on fire. But itâs not just up to you. Ruby has been asking you about it since the day you told her you were filming it, and now all she wants to do is see the final result. And itâs only forty-five minutes long. Whatâs that when compared to the rest of your life?
âFine,â you relent, not wanting to fight about it any longer. âLet me get my computer.â
Ruby cheers.Â
You bring your laptop over to your coffee table, turning off the ceiling lights as Ruby tucks herself underneath a blanket, hands warmed by her steaming cup of tea. You pull up the movie file and, taking a deep breath, press play.Â
It opens with your first interview with Taehyung, a muted, royalty-free lo-fi hip-hop song playing in the background. You had edited it so that it would jump back and forth between your answer and Jungkookâs, highlighting the contrast between the two of you. It was mostly for comedic purposes, just because seeing you deadpan about how love doesnât exist and then quickly switching to Jungkook wax poetic about it is amusing, but watching it now just makes you want to curl into yourself.Â
You should have known that this would have never worked out. Should have kept that same jaded attitude. You let your guard down for one second and look at whatâs happened to you.
The next scene that Jungkook shows is, of course, the moment he spills burning hot coffee all over you in the middle of the Starbucks, comedically panning up to your positively-flabbergasted face just to add to the shock factor. Next to you, Ruby laughs at the mishap, obviously amused by the fact that the two of you are now drenched in coffee and scrambling to clean up the mess. You try to focus your energy on how peeved you were at Jungkook after he did that, but get distracted the moment he films himself wrapping his denim jacket around you, placing it over your shoulders and making sure itâs just right.Â
He didnât have to do that, and the two of you both knew it. But still, he sent you off your class all bundled up in a jacket that smelled like him, smelled of that boyish aroma that you couldnât get rid of, even when you put it in the wash with your lavender detergent. All of Jungkookâs clothes smelt like that no matter how much cologne he put on, always smelt woody and thick. It would consume you, that scent, a cloud surrounding your figure whenever you were near him.Â
The movie keeps playing, and you keep thinking about how much of a fool you must look like in it now, all giggles and smiles as Jungkook sings Frankie Valli to you while he hands you a rose, that same sly little smile dotting his features. Hearing the song again makes you feel like youâre choking, like somethingâs smothering you, and youâre not sure what it is until you realize that itâs the sound of Jungkookâs voice.Â
You havenât heard him sing since he serenaded you.Â
Then itâs your first date, the one Ruby told you to wear the yellow dress to (âHey, I told you you looked amazing in it! Wow!â Ruby exclaims when she sees you). You remember when you edited this, putting the clips together of you eating at the restaurant, wandering around the park, posing underneath the trees, holding hands. You were smiling so hard your cheeks hurt while you were editing, grinning from ear to ear at all of the things the two of you did together. They were so picturesque, those scenes, so perfectly shot, so romanticiât did a fine job of convincing you that it was all real.Â
You even put in the little clip of you and Taehyung talking. A mistake, now that you look back on it, of course. It was so vulnerable, so real, so candid and honest like you said you would be, and now itâs all blown up in your face. You must have looked like such an idiot to Jungkook when he saw this scene for the first time in class. You remember the wide-eyed look on his face when it popped up. Like he couldnât even believe you had done this in the first place.Â
Scoffing, you shake your head. You either.Â
The rest of it you can hardly bear to watch. Just a wrap-up of your relationship, a compilation of all of the small moments you shared when you didnât realize that Jungkook was filming, when you dared whip out your camera to shoot for a second or two. Little clips that jump from scene to scene, shots of you laughing and eating and skipping along campus as you held hands. Itâs hard to reconcile the fact that itâs all over.Â
You donât even listen to the final interview, not bothering to pay attention to what you or Jungkook have to say when you were there, when you can recall every word heâs ever spoken to you at the drop of a hat.Â
The truth is, you were always a goner for him.Â
And look how well that played out.Â
By the time the kissing scene comes up once more, youâre ready to set your whole laptop alight.Â
The screen turns black as it ends, fading away into nothingness, the instrumental slowly disappearing alongside the image. You shut your laptop when itâs all over, a little too angry for your own good, but you wrestle the scowl off your face as you take a drink of water from the glass sitting on the table.Â
âWow,â Ruby says, speechless. She blinks at your closed laptop.Â
âDid you like it?â
âIâI donât even know what to say,â Ruby says, which is a first. âIt was amazing, Y/N. Seriously. Gorgeous. Like, cinematographically? Stunning. The shit on Netflix isnât even as good as that.â
Even if you did have to sit through your stupid movie one more time, the compliments make you feel a bit better. âThanks,â you murmur.Â
Ruby nods enthusiastically. âIt was incredible. Iâm justâIâm in awe. You and Jungkook have a gift, dude. It was seriously one of the best things Iâve watched in a really long time. And, like, not even in a cheesy, yucky rom-com kind of way. It was so⊠so genuine. So real. Wow.â
âIâm glad you liked it.â
âYouâll have to tell Jungkook, too,â Ruby says. âHe did really well.â
âYeah, heâs a great actor,â you say, a little too bitterly for your own good.Â
âWhat do you mean?â Ruby raises an eyebrow your way. âI didnât think he was acting at all. It looked pretty real to me.â
You frown. âIt did?â
âI mean, yeah,â Ruby says with an honest nod. âI mean, you did tell me it was a mockumentary and not just a run-of-the-mill rom-com. So wasnât everything supposed to be real, anyway?â
âYesâŠâ you trail off, unsure of the direction of this conversation.
âWell, if you ask me,â Ruby says, all matter-of-factly, âIâd say he definitely fell in love with you.â
Something rushes through you. Something warm and bright and full of energy.Â
Hope.Â
Even though you have finished one of your finals early, finals week is still just as much of a slog as it always is. Three essays and two presentations deep, you arenât finished any of them and the due dates are slowly creeping up on you, ready to pounce the moment the clock strikes twelve.Â
Eh, it could be worse. You could be Ruby and have six timed, proctored final exams on biology, anatomy, and chemistry. So you suppose you canât complain too much.Â
Finals week sees you all holed up in your apartment like always, but more so this semester than any previous ones because you donât feel like going to the library and risking seeing Jungkook there. Or anywhere, really. Since you presented on the last day of classes, you havenât spoken since, and hopefully you can keep that streak going forever. You had made it until this semester without ever crossing paths despite being in the same major, so hopefully that luck will follow you.Â
Itâs almost midnight when you finally decide to call it quits for the night, having at least gotten mostly through two of your essays (just have to edit and proofread!) and worked on about half of your two presentations. Sighing, you get up from your couch and stretch, feeling your bones crack from sitting in the same place for hours on end.Â
You lean over to the floor lamp by the edge of the couch, ready to flick it off and head to bed, when you hear something outside.Â
âYouâre just too good to be trueâŠâ
âCanât take my eyes off of youâŠâ
You freeze.
The voice is soft and mellow, a little muted because itâs making its way through your wooden door before it reaches your ears, but it is unrecognizable. Even without the acoustics of the Eighth Notes, you know whoâs on the other side.Â
âYouâd be like Heaven to touchâŠâ
âI wanna hold you so muchâŠâ
âAt long last, love has arrivedâŠâ
âAnd I thank God Iâm aliveâŠâ
Unable to resist, you wander to your front door, basking in the sound of him, in the way the notes float through the air as if on clouds, dancing along the walls as they sink into your brain. He sounds so sweet, voice warm like tea on a cold night, just singing his song on this empty, lonely night. But itâs not just his song, is it?Â
Itâs yours, too.
You pull open the door.Â
âYouâre just too good to be true,â Jungkook sings, a honeyed melody that calms the waves of your stormy heart, âcanât take my eyes off of youâŠâ
But just because heâs here, serenading you once more, doesnât mean heâs going to get it any easier from you. You fight to keep the smile off your face, pressing your lips together as you narrow your eyes at him.Â
âI love you, baby, and if itâs quite alright, I need you, baby, to warm the lonely nightâŠâ
âI love you, baby, trust in me when I sayâŠâ
He meets your eyes with his own, and they arenât glinting in the way they normally do, the way that they do when he knows heâs doing something to grind your gears, when heâs got a trick up his sleep. They gleam like pearls as the dim glow of your apartment lights up his figure, warm yellow mixing with the caramel in his irises.
âOh, pretty baby, donât bring me down, I prayâŠâ
Oh, pretty baby, now that Iâve found you, stayâŠâ
âAnd let me love you, babyâŠâ
From behind him, Jungkook brings out a single red rose, twirling it between his fingers as he holds it out to you.Â
âLet me love youâŠâ He trails off there, voice delicate as vanishes into the chilly night air, disappearing between the two of you.Â
You canât help but take the flower from his hand. What else are you supposed to do?
âSo?â Jungkook asks, hopeful.Â
âDonât think you can just show up at my apartment and woo me back by singing to me,â you chide, even though he definitely can.Â
âIâm sorry,â Jungkook says simply, because there really is nothing else to say. âI should have told you.â
âI watched our rom-com again,â you tell him. âI should have believed you when you said you cared about me.â
âI always did,â Jungkook says. âI just wanted you to know that love was real, and that it was there for you.â
âI should have known,â you agree. You look up at Jungkook through lidded eyes, musing to yourself. âYou know what I learned?â
Jungkook tilts his head in curiosity. âWhat?â
âThat love isnât a feeling. Itâs a person,â you explain, sighing pleasantly. âLove comes to us through the things we share with other people. Thatâs what it is.â Your thumbs twiddle in front of you, the pads of your fingers rubbing at the stem of the rose.
He takes a single step forward, reaching out to take your hand in his own. âAnd are you pleased with who youâve found?â
You roll your eyes. âJust shut up and kiss me already, you idiot.â
Jungkook obliges without a second thought.Â
There is no one to film you this time, no project to work on. There is only you, and there is only him. And there is only a lifetime that the two of you share, a story that you have told together, piece by piece, frame by frame. Your movie didnât end once you finished editing. Nor did it end the moment the screen went black in Pollackâs class. It wasnât even over when you watched it a second time with Ruby.Â
No, it continues on. Forever and ever, so long as you are with him. There will always be something new to capture, to burn into a disk so youâll have it for eternity.
He pulls you in for a kiss and itâs not the end of the film. Itâs the beginning of a brand new part, a new installment in the series that is your life with him. That is the relationship you have created together. His lips arenât the fireworks as the credits roll. They are the scene where the two characters meet for the very first time and know that they were meant to be. The scene that sets all of the other ones in motion. That is who Jungkook is. That is what you are sharing, right now.Â
A brand new frame.Â
When you part, you press your forehead against his, soft blonde locks framing his face as they tickle your face, dancing along the skin of your cheeks.
âYou called it a rom-com,â Jungkook points out randomly, just remembering now.Â
âWell, isnât it?â
âI donât knowâŠâ Jungkook says, pretending to think about it as he rocks on the back of his feet. âDid it have a happy ending?â
You bring your lips to his once more, arms wrapped around his neck as you clasp the rose between your fingers. You make a mental note to press it later. Something else to remember him by. Something other than your movie.Â
Jungkook pulls you into him once more, hands resting firmly on your waist, letting his body press against yours as you stand there in the muted light of your apartmentâs living room, letting the cool spring breeze wash over you. You smile against his lips, feeling your heart race when he grins back.Â
âYes,â you declare proudly.Â
And so, they lived happily ever after.Â
âł thanks for reading! donât forget to let me know if you enjoyed it!
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a/n:Â omg! it's been so long since i last wrote something for harry so it feels a bit weird but in a good way to be back. i've been spending more time offline so writing hasn't been going that fast like before, but im working on a few other stuff too! just please be patient with me, im trying my besti swear! so now enjoy this oneshot of two oblivious and stupid roommates who start sharing a bed...
pairing: Roommate!Harry x reader
word count:Â 8.1k
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Living with three boys has its perks but also a lot of downsides too. Itâs not how you planned, you were set to move in with one of your friends from second year, but she bailed on you last minute, leaving you with no place to live when most of the houses were already taken for the next at least one year. You were bracing yourself to sleep under a bridge or something already when your heroes came along.
You went to high school with Harry Niall and Louis, but you werenât exactly in the same friend group, just knew about each other. Then you ended up in the same Lit class freshman year with Harry and he was basically your pass into their little group. You hit it off pretty easily and you always wondered why you didnât become friends before college. Later you had two more classes with him in the second semester and it was just all a coincidence that he found out about your living situation.
âWhy donât you move in with us?â he prompted one afternoon when you were studying together in the library.
âIâm not sharing a room with any of you, Harry,â you sighed, shaking your head.
âYou wouldnât have to. We had a fourth mate living with us but he dropped out about a month ago. You could take his bedroom.â
âAre for real? You should talk about it with the boys first, donât you think?â
âIâm sure they wouldnât mind it. They like you too and if Iâm being honest, the place could use the touch of a woman,â he smirked and you just rolled your eyes, but you were incredibly thankful for the offer.
So after talking with Niall and Louis about it and once they gave their amens on the situation, you officially moved in with the three of them.
Youâd be lying if you said there hasnât been times when you thought about choosing the bridge, living with boys is not exactly a dream. They are messy, sometimes loud and oblivious about certain things women do and need. Youâll never forget Niallâs face when you packed the shelf above the toilet with your tampons and pads. The horror in his eyes as he examined all the different sizes and types.
âBut why so many? I donât get it why you need the large ones and the mini ones too,â he huffed.
âBecause I vary them according to the strength of my flow.â
âBless you,â he scoffed and just walked away.
They tend to leave their clothes around the house and they donât always realize when itâs time to let some fresh air into the place either. Harry has a sixth sense wanting to use the bathroom when youâre in and Louis always forgets to get rid of his spoiled food from the fridge. Tini things that surely got you thinking if it was a good idea to move in with them. But then there are times when you canât even imagine sharing a home with anyone else than these three idiots.
The way Harry always leaves you a cup of coffee on the counter when he has an early class on mondays and wednesdays, how Niall always waits for you to get home after your night shifts at the restaurant youâve been working at, but he always just says he was watching Supernatural on TV. You love that Louis goes out of his way to get you your favorite pastry for breakfast on sundays when he goes for his morning runs. But the absolute best is that you never feel alone or bored with these three around. Something is always happening and they make sure to involve you in everything, making you feel like part of their little pack.
Tonight is Thursday and Thursdays are movie nights in your home. Itâs been a tradition since the first week and you havenât missed any of them. Sitting on the couch at your usual spot, you laugh as Niall growls in annoyance when you suggest to watch another rom-com.
âNot again!â he protests, sitting on the floor by the coffee table you and Harry thrifted a few months ago after the previous one was broken at a smaller party held in the house.
âWhy? I bet Harry would love it!â you grin, glancing at the guy in talk who is now entering the room with a big bowl of popcorn.
âOf course he would, because he is a pussy! And the two of you always team up, dragging Louis with you so I can never watch something I enjoy!â Niall whines as Harry sits next to you, not too bothered by his friendâs cries.
âCome on, I bet you enjoyed Crazy, Stupid Love last week!â you laugh, remembering how he whined for the first part, then fell asleep at the end.
âLove, if you think that was enjoyment, I wouldnât want to be your boyfriend,â Niall scoffs and you gasp at his reply.
âHey!â you snap at him, but canât help laughing. This is how it always goes with you and Niall, the non-stop bickering can sometimes drive Harry and Lou insane.
âOkay, so what do you want to watch?â Harry asks, throwing some popcorn into his mouth as he gets comfortable, an arm resting on the back of the couch behind you, the other one busy with the snack in his lap.
âThere is this new horror Iâve been dying to see!â Niallâs blue eyes light up right away, but youâre fast to break that shine.
âNah, no way. Iâm not watching a horror movie.â
âWhy not?â
âBecause I fucking hate them and they scare the shit out of me.â
âThatâs like the whole point!â he protests, but you shake your head no again.
âWhat are you fighting about again?â Louis asks, walking into the room after his quick shower, the smell of his body wash filling the room for a few moments.
âI want to watch a horror movie, but Y/N is a little baby and she doesnât want to.â
âIâm not a baby! I just donât enjoy watching people get killed or demons sucking the life out of someone!â Niall just rolls his eyes at your response.
âBut itâs always what you or Harry wants to watch, why canât I choose just this once?â
âThatâs not true, we watch movies you like too!â you retort, but Niall gives you an unimpressed look. âWe watched that crime thing, that was your choice!â
âThat was three months ago, Y/N,â he sighs and as you do some quick math you realize that he is right.
âHey, he has a point. Letâs just watch what he wants this one time, yeah?â Harry curls his arm thatâs been on the back of the couch around your shoulder and he pulls you to his side, squeezing you gently.
âBut I hate horrors,â you pout, knowing well that itâs already kind of settled, you lost this battle.
âItâs just a movie. And if you get scared in the night, you can sleep at mine,â he offers with a wink that surely makes your heartbeat fasten a bit.
If youâre being honest, youâve always had a tiny crush on Harry, even back in high school, when you didnât really know him. He was the cool guy, but not the douchebag type, more like the one that was nice to everyone and earned their respect and liking. Getting to know him just proved that he really is a great guy, but you figured he would never feel the same way about you. These three guys only saw you as their sister and that was in a way kinda worse than being friend zoned, but thereâs nothing you can do about it, so you just decided to come to peace with your situation. But that doesnât mean you donât get flustered when you see him wander around the house in just his boxers or when he gets a little touchy with you, which happens a lot, because thatâs just how he is. Hands on your shoulders, a little squeeze on your hips, the gentle touch of his fingers on your back, they happen all the time and they get your pulse up every time. You can only hope itâs not that noticeable.
Niall finally gets what he wants and you agree to watch that stupid horror movie. It doesnât start off too bad, but it quickly escalates and makes you shudder every time the screen gets a little darker or the music is foreshadowing that something is about to happen.
âJesus fuck!â you jump a little when the killer appears out of nowhere in the scene.
âYou alright?â Harry asks, peeking down at you.
âI fucking hate this dude,â you mumble, rubbing your face with your hands, to get your shit together. Harry chuckles lightly next to you, his arm pulling you to his side close and you gladly sink against him, the warmth of his body giving you some comfort and a sense of safety.
Your eyes are on the screen, but your mind is dancing around how his fingers are delicately running up and down your arm, drawing circles and little shapes on your skin. It could put you to sleep easily, even with the woman screaming on the screen after seeing her husband get killed.
âJust imagine the guy with a funny mustache,â Harry murmurs, leaning closer to you so he doesnât bother the other two guys with his comment. âOr maybe in a ridiculous outfit.â
âLike⊠in a onsie?â you ask, squinting your eyes at the screen.
âCould be, yeah,â he chuckles quietly. âJust imagine him running through the woods in a onsie with bunnies all over it.â
You canât push your laughter down, covering your mouth with your hand so you donât bother the others. Harry just smirks, giving you a squeeze as youâre still melted against his side on the couch, legs pulled up to your chest, while his are spread out in front of him.
âDefinitely not that scary,â you giggle and Harry hums in agreement.
âWould you mind getting a fucking room, you guys? You have two, in fact!â Niall snaps at you playfully, when you start laughing again.
âSorry, sorry!â you clear your throat, your cheeks heating up at the comment, but luckily itâs dark enough to hide your embarrassment. Niall is always quick to make dirty jokes and tease you in a way that makes you nervous, especially when it involves Harry as well. He has made plenty of comments about you and Harry since youâve moved in, implying that the two of you sometimes act like a couple or that you should hook up. Harry is always quick to shake them off, thatâs how you know he couldnât even take the thought seriously.
At the end of the movie you feel like it wasnât bad, not with Harry holding you close at least.
âWill you be screaming tonight, Y/N?â Niall teases you, making you roll your eyes at him.
âEither way itâs gonna be your fault.â
âI can live with that!â he laughs, bidding his goodbye before he shuts the door of his bedroom behind him.
You do your usual evening routine, get ready to bed and by the time youâre done in the bathroom all the boys have retired into their rooms. The hallway stands dark in front of you, only a tiny bit of light coming from your bedroom since you left your bedside lamp on in there, but you still canât help the eerie feeling that washes over you. That movie didnât sit right with you and now you have to face the aftermath of it.
Switching the lights in the bathroom off you sprint into your bedroom, pictures from the movie flashing in your mind of the killer just jumping out of nowhere. You shut the door and lean your back against it for a moment, taking a deep breath. Tonight is going to be long.
No matter how hard you try, you just canât fall asleep. Youâre way too alerted, opening your eyes at the tiniest of sounds around you, which is unfortunate, because your window is looking over the main street, unlike two other rooms in the house, that are facing the small backyard. Harry and Louis have the luck to have those rooms.
Every time youâre about to fall asleep something from the movie sneaks into your thoughts and you get scared to death. Soon, you realize you wonât be able to sleep on your own tonight.
Sitting on the edge of your bed, you wonder if Harry really meant that offer that you can sleep with him or not. Part of you is convinced it was just a joke, but when you hear someone shouting down the street you push your doubts aside and you quickly find yourself making your way to Harryâs room.
You knock on the room lightly, not wanting to wake anyone else up. The last thing you need is Niall seeing you go into Harryâs room in the middle of the night.
No answer comes from inside, but you wonât just leave it at that. Opening the door youâre facing another dark room, barely making out the furniture, but you already know the route by heart. Making it to the bed your eyes finally adjust to the darkness and you can see Harry lying on his side, sleeping peacefully. Squatting down you place a hand to his shoulder and give him a tiny shake.
âHarry?â you call out quietly, but his answer is just a huff. âHarry, itâs me,â you try again, squeezing his arm. He furrows his eyebrows before slowly blinking his eyes open, finding you in his sight.
âY/N? Whatâs wrong?â he asks in that groggy, low voice you love hearing in the morning so much.
âI canât⊠Did you mean that I can sleep here if Iâm scared?â you ask, afraid that he might just have a good laugh and send you back to your room. For a long moment, he just blinks at you before nodding his head and you feel relief washing over you.
âSure,â he hums.
âO-okay then Iâll bring a blanket and take the floor and--â
âShut up, you are not sleeping on the floor,â he growls, grabbing your wrist and pulling you into bed with him as he scoots over, making you space on the mattress.
Itâs a bit weird at first, lying in bed with Harry, especially because itâs just queen sized, so thereâs not much space between the two of you, but it seems like Harry doesnât mind it so why should you?
Your nerves are a lot calmer with Harry next to you, but maybe itâs still because of the movie or because youâre a bit anxious about the whole situation, you just still canât relax enough to fall asleep.
âY/N, no one is gonna kill you here,â Harry speaks up surprising you because you thought he has already fallen back asleep.
âI know, I know,â you whisper, trying to sound convincing, but you canât fool anyone, especially not him.
He huffs deeply and before you could realize whatâs happening, Harryâs arm is curled around your waist, pulling you against him, spooning you from behind, the warmth of his body wrapping your figure almost entirely.
âIf a murderer comes, they will have to fight me first, alright? Now sleep,â he mumbles against your hair, squeezing you gently. All at once, you couldnât care about killers and dark shadows around you, because Harry was right there, holding you tight and there was nowhere you wanted to be more than right there.
You slept like a baby. Harryâs closeness kept every nightmare away from you and the morning came with ease. Harryâs phone wakes the two of you up at eight, because he has a morning class at 9.30. The two of you are completely tangled up in each other, lying on your side facing each other, Harryâs arms are wrapped around you, while yours are hugging his waist. Groaning at the sound of his alarm, he rolls to his back to reach for the phone on the nightstand and then he finally turns it off. Itâs bright outside, the darkness of the night finally long gone. Youâre still groggy when Harry rolls back, his arm coming back around you like itâs the most natural thing in the world and in a sense, it feels like that. But as you both slowly wake up, you realize that you might be a little too close. Slowly but surely you let go of each other, rolling to your back, staring up at the ceiling.
âHope I didnât kick you in my sleep,â you smile at him, peeking over at him, hoping to break the awkwardness of the situation.
âNo, donât worry about it,â he chuckles, rubbing his eyes, before pushing himself up and off the bed. You follow him with your gaze as he steps to his dresser and grabs a pair of clean underwear. âIâll put on a coffee while I shower, want one too?â he asks, though you know he could make one for you anyway.
âSure, thank you,â you nod and he nods back, yawning as he walks out of the room, leaving you lying in his bed, a bit confused and kind of aching to be held by him again.
Two days pass by, everything is going as per usual, neither you nor Harry brings up that you spent the night in his bed that one particular time. Now itâs saturday and you all were planning to go out, but a sudden storm has cancelled your plans, so the evening turned into a cozy, lazy hangout instead of a wild party at some frat house.
Louis decided to work on a paper thatâs due in two weeks, Niall has been relentlessly swiping on Tinder while you and Harry are spawled out on the couch, watching some shitty action movie that was on TV, since you both were too lazy to choose one and put it on. Deep down youâre a little happy you donât have to spend the evening in a crowded, smelly house, drinking cheap alcohol.
Harry gets up from his seat to grab himself a drink just when Niall growls in annoyance.
âWhat is it?â you ask.
âThey keep unmatching with me after weâve talked a little!â
âHave you thought about the reason?â you smirk at him, knowing well that Niall probably isnât the easiest to talk to, he surely takes it too far too soon.
âWell they probably donât like that I ask them if I can go over,â he shrugs, making you laugh.
âYouâd go over in the pouring rain?â Harry asks, returning to his spot on the couch. He puts his drink to the coffee table and instead of sitting into his previous position, leaning against the arm of the couch, he lies down, laying his head to your thigh, making your breath hitch for a moment.
âOf course not!â Niall rolls his eyes. âBut I thought it would make them think I would do anything for them.â
âIt makes you seem desperate,â Harry retorts, earning a questioning look from his friend. âWhat? It does!â
âNo, it doesnât.â
âYes it does,â you nod in agreement. âGoing over in the middle of a storm just to fuck? Sounds like youâre having a hard time finding someone.â
âWomen are so fucking complicated, and for what?!â he growls, before storming off to his bedroom, like an angsty teenager, leaving you and Harry alone.
He doesnât move, his head stays on your thigh using it as a pillow. His curls are tickling the soft skin on your thigh and you have to fight the urge to play with his hair or scratch his scalp. You stay like this for the rest of the movie and when he gets up you almost want to pull him back.
âAlright, Iâm fucked, Iâm gonna go to bed,â he yawns, stretching his arms out into the air as he heads into his bedroom. âGood night, Y/N.â
âNight, Harry!â you call after him as you watch his frame disappear down the hallway.
Sighing, you slide down on the couch, cursing under your breath that youâre still so hung up on Harry. You really thought that you had it under control, but lately those damn butterflies are acting up in your stomach at everything he does.
âIâm pathetic,â you mumble under your breath just as the sky rumbles outside with a blinding lightning, making you jump with a squeak. âShit,â you huff, already knowing that falling asleep will be a pain in the ass. Again.
Youâve always hated storms, they make you think that something bad is about to happen, a tree is about to fall into the window or a lightning will blow up the building. Itâs kind of stupid, you know it, but you just canât help it.
Tossing and turning, you jump every time a lightning flashes somewhere outside and a few seconds later the thunder rips through your whole body, almost making you fall off the bed.
âOh God,â you let out a shaky breath. You have no idea how long it is until the Storm finally stops and youâd really like to have a good night's sleep. So pushing your anxious thoughts to the side, you get out of bed and head over to Harryâs room once again.
Itâs such a deja vu from a few nights ago, as you gently knock on the door you wait again, but this time you actually get an answer.
âYeah?â you hear him call out from inside and you slowly open the door, peeking your head inside. Harry is lying in bed, his head propped up against the headboard as he is scrolling through his phone. âY/N? Whatâs wrong?â he asks, putting the phone aside as he sits up.
âI just, I-I know itâs stupid, but I was thinking⊠I donât know--â
âY/N, just tell me, alright? Come on in,â he gestures for you and you slip into the room, closing the door behind you before sitting to the edge of the bed next to him. âWhatâs wrong?â
âI canât sleep during stormsâŠâ you admit, looking into his eyes, hoping he gets the hint where you want to head with it. He stares back at you for a moment before he scoots over, lifting the covers up, giving you the green light to join him.
Relieved, you climb over to him, making yourself comfortable as he wraps the blanket over you, his arm immediately coming to cradle you, this time pulling you to his chest so your head is laid upon his shoulder, a hand gently placed onto his hard chest, probably right above where his butterfly tattoo is adorning his abdomen.
This is now easily your favorite place. Safe and tight in Harryâs arms, protected from anything and everything, like youâre in a little bubble as soon as you get on his bed.
Lightning strikes outside again and you shiver a little. Harry probably notices it, because he tightens his hold around you, as if itâs his way telling you that he is here and nothing bad is gonna happen. Eventually, youâre able to shut the outside out and only focus on Harryâs warmth, the touch of his hand on your arm and his even breathing. And then finally, you drift off to sleep.
This morning is different from the previous one you spent here. Thereâs no alarm since itâs Sunday, neither of you have anything in particular to do, so you wake up feeling rested, the Sun shining through his half drawn in curtains, no trace of last nightâs storm can be noticed from where youâre lying in bed, the sky is as clear as ever. Sometime during the night you got tangled in a way where Harry is the one now cuddling you, his head lying on your chest, hugging you as if you were a giant teddy bear, his leg thrown between yours, lightly snoring against your sleep shirt. You can only see his mop of hair and the urge to play with them is back, but this time, you give in.
Leaving one hand on his back, you move the other one to his unruly locks, gently playing with one before you comb your fingers through it, lightly scratching his scalp. Harry hums in pleasure, shifting from his dreams back to reality, but he doesnât move, just keeps humming as you massage his scalp.
âItâs not a good morning, itâs the best,â he mumbles groggily, making you chuckle at his words.
One of his hands is flat against your ribcage and the damned butterflies start dancing when you feel his fingers gently stroke your side as you keep playing with his curls. This feels so idyllic, as if youâve been like this forever. You wish that was true.
Groaning as he stretches, Harry rolls to his back, making you instantly miss his body pressed against yours. He rubs his eyes, sighing deep as he blinks up at the ceiling a few times, then he turns his head to the side, looking at you.
Just when he is about to say something, outside his door it sounds like someone just broke a pile of plates and itâs followed by Niallâs usual annoyed growl. You both get out of bed to go and check what happened, not even thinking about how it might appear that you both are coming from Harryâs room in the morning.
Harry flings the door open and there is Niall, collecting pieces of a plate from the floor, his breakfast scattered down the hallway as well while he curses under his breath.
âWhat happened?â Harry asks, picking up a bigger piece from the plate.
âFucking tripped,â he growls back, glancing up just for a moment, then back down, but then he processes that youâre standing behind Harry, in his room, in the morning. âWhat the fuck are you doing in Harryâs room?â he bluntly asks, quickly forgetting about the mess he just made.
âWhat?â you ask nervously, your pulse quickening in an instant. Harry stands up, seemingly not too bothered by Niallâs question.
âYou slept in his room?!â
âShe did,â Harry answers, leaning against the doorframe.
âWait, are you two fucking?â Niallâs eyes widen, snapping back and forth between you and Harry.
âJust because two people sleep in the same bed, doesnât mean they are fucking, Niall,â Harry chuckles, seemingly amused by the situation thatâs got your stomach knotted. Louisâ door opens and he walks out, his hair a little messy, but already dressed, a mug halfway filled with coffee in his hand.
âWhaâs this circus out here?â he asks, looking around, his eyes scanning over the mess on the floor.
âDid you know these two are fucking?â Niall asks him and Harry lets his head drop back at his words.
âAre you?â Louis simply questions and you shake your head no.
âWe are not. Y/N canât sleep in a storm so she came over to mine.â
âFunny, she doesnât come to me when sheâs scared,â Niall scoffs.
âI never came to you because you donât understand that sleeping together doesnât mean sex,â you retort, though your ears are practically burning from the rising anxiety inside you.
âWait, whoa. This wasnât the first time you two slept together?â
âShe was scared after your stupid horror movie too,â Harry shrugs.
âWow, so are you guys a thing now or what?â
âNiall!â Harry growls and youâre not entirely sure what bothers you more. Niallâs shock and interrogation or the way Harry seems so cool and unbothered, like itâs no big deal. Maybe because for him it really isnât, itâs only about the sleeping, nothing else, even though the cuddles are a little beyond the lines of friendship.
âWhat? Iâm just asking the important stuff! Am I not allowed to tell dirty jokes to Y/N because youâll cut my prick off?â
âYou shouldnât tell those anyway,â Louis chimes in and you nod in agreement.
Seeing that the conversation is just getting more and more awkward with each passing moment you decide to pull yourself out of it. Pushing yourself past Harry you mumble an excuse me before rushing back into your room, the three boys eyeing you curiously as you shut the door behind you, finally putting a physical barrier between you and them.
You shouldnât be this offended, itâs not like any promises were made and you should have known better and not fall for him more than you already did. It was silly of you to think that there was anything more behind these nights spent curled up against each other, or when you woke up tangled and melted together. It was never what you hoped it to be.
Then and there you decide itâs better if you distanced yourself from him, or at least go back to how it was before. No bed sharing, no cuddling and preferably no bitter feelings.
It all goes well, because you have a pretty busy week after that day, you always have something to do and itâs not like you spent the night with Harry randomly, so it was evident that you stayed in your room so far.
But about a week later another storm was threatening to strike. The sky was gradually darkening all afternoon and now itâs only five oâclock, but it feels like eight. Itâs Sunday, youâre quite exhausted since you were working until three. Niall was out somewhere with some of his coursemates and Louis went home for the weekend, wonât be back until Tuesday. Itâs just you and Harry, whoâs been sprawled out on the couch in only his sweatpants while youâre making yourself an early dinner so you can go to bed soon and have a good nightâs sleep.
It doesnât take long for the rain to start pouring, youâve just gotten out of the shower when the first thunder rips through the place, making you gasp in fear. Harryâs head snaps around, looking in your way where youâre standing at the bathroom door, a questioning look in his eyes, but he doesnât say a word. Ignoring his gaze, you just make your way into your bedroom, not even thinking about what could be on his mind. Is he thinking about whether youâll ask to sleep with him again or he doesnât care about it at all?
By the time you are ready to go to bed, the storm is fully raging outside, making your insides tremble every time you see a lightning or the thunder breaks the quietness in the house. You make one last trip to the kitchen, finding Harry leaned against the counter as he eats an apple.
âGoing to bed early?â he asks as you pour yourself some water.
âMhm,â you nod, avoiding looking at him.
âEverything alright?â
âSure, Iâm just tired,â you force a small smile onto your face just when a thunder rumbles outside, making you jump. Harry is watching you curiously and kind of expectantly, but youâre doing your best ignoring it. Instead, you just grab your water and head back to your room. âGood night.â
âNight, Y/N,â he calls after you, and you can feel his burning gaze on your back right until you close the door behind you.
Your plan to sleep a good ten hours goes right out the window. It doesnât seem like the storm is about to calm anytime soon, so youâre stuck to suffer through it on your own. Youâll be damned to go to Harryâs, that would be an instant heart break and you just canât take that right now. Long, torturous hours pass by with you lying awake in bed and part of you wants to go running over to Harry, but you force yourself to stay. Itâs not happening tonight.
You fall asleep sometime after two in the morning when the thunder and lightning have stopped. Unfortunately, you need to wake up early in the morning, so when your phoneâs alarm shakes you out of your sleep, you feel like absolute shit. Dragging yourself out of bed appears to be the hardest thing right now. As you make your way out, you are met with an all too familiar figure sitting at the small dining table, two cups of coffees in front of him, one obviously made for you.
Harryâs eyes snap up at you curiously, taking in your terrible looks as you head to the bathroom.
âMorning,â you mumble under your breath.
âGood morningâ,â he nods in your way and though he doesnât say anything else, you can tell he has a few thoughts about your current state.
Once youâre done with your morning business in there you join him at the table, barely able to keep your eyes open.
âRough night?â he asks, eyes examining your face.
âKinda.â
âThe storm?â
You donât answer, just nod your head. He remains silent, but you can feel that he is dying to ask another question.
Why didnât you come over?
Youâre glad he doesnât actually asks you, because you wouldnât be able to give either a normal answer or say anything without starting to cry. Instead, you just grab your coffee and head back into your bedroom to get ready for the day.
That week on Friday all four of you are invited to a party. At first you want to cancel, but some of your friends from classes will be there too and itâs been ages since youâve been to a great party, so you decide to tag along with the boys.
For the first half of the evening you go your separate way, spending time with people you donât actually live with and see every day. One drink follows the other, though you make sure you donât go farther than getting tipsy. Youâre not in the mood to deal with a nasty hangover in the morning.
Sometime after your third or fourth drink you run into Niall and he pulls you into their little circle that also involves Harry. When he sees that youâve joined them, his eyes light up and goes out of his way to get next to you.
âI havenât seen you in ages!â he whines, slurring his words as he wraps an arm around your shoulders to keep you at his side. He is definitely drunk, that youâre sure of.
âItâs been just about two hours, Harry,â you roll your eyes, but canât push your smile down. Youâd be lying if you said youâre not enjoying having him so close. Your dynamic hasnât been the same since you stopped sleeping in his bed. Not that it was such a regular activity, it only happened two times.
âBut I missed you, I feel like we havenât⊠havenât talked in so long!â he huffs, knitting his eyebrows together. âHave you been avoiding me?â he asks leaning closer, so your conversation can somewhat be private.
âThatâs silly. Of course I havenât!â
âBut it feels like that,â he pouts with glossy eyes. âYouâd tell me if something was wrong, right?â
âSure,â you nod, the bitter taste of lying filling your mouth.
âAlright, cool,â he smirks and pulling closer he kisses into your hair before he engages with the rest of the group again, keeping his arm around you as if it wasnât a big deal.
For the rest of the evening you simply donât leave his side and not because he doesnât let you, but because you donât want to. Harry is not the only one missing the other, this week youâve noticed that even though youâve been keeping yourself busy, your thoughts always took you back to one particular, curly haired boy. Despite everything thatâs been going on, he is your friend first and foremost who you love spending time with and talking about anything and everything.
Both of you are intoxicated, Harry a bit more than you, but youâre having a blast playing beerpong or ruining Niallâs chances with girls he is trying to pick up. Youâre genuinely having an amazing time and it wouldnât be the same without Harry.
Arriving back home your little group splits, everyone using the bathroom after the other and youâre the last one in line, because you always take the longest. By the time youâre finished, Louis and Niall are both locked up in their rooms, but Harryâs door is still open, some dim lighting illuminating the hallway. As you approach it, you find him throwing his dirty clothes into the hamper, but his head perks up when he sees you.
âGood night, H,â you sigh, quite tired and in need of a good sleep, but before you could head into your own bedroom, Harry grabs your wrist and pulls you into his. âWhat is it?â
âSleep here,â he simply prompts, already leading you to the bed.
âWhy?â
âBecause I want you to.â
âI-I⊠I donât--â you stutter, feeling flustered from his offer.
âCome on, you canât say no,â he tells you, already crawling under his covers and then he holds them up as the invitation.
Taking a deep breath you follow him and make yourself comfortable in your almost usual spot. Harryâs arm falls over your waist in an instant, spooning you from behind as he hums pleased. But a few moments later he lifts his head, looking at you with concern in his eyes.
âYou know you can say no, right? I was just joking.â Looking back at him you give him a small smile. Even drunk he makes sure you arenât doing anything you donât want to, but how could you not want it? Youâve been aching to sleep next to him all week, especially after the last storm when you suffered alone in your room.
âI know, Harry.â
âAlright, okay,â he nods, his head dropping back to the pillow. âI missed this,â he mumbles with a sigh.
âYeah?â
âMm, sleeping alone sucks,â he hums and in a split second, your heart breaks.
Harry didnât want to sleep with you, he just wanted to sleep with someone and you were the one there. It has nothing to do with you.
You want to blame him, you want it to be his fault that your chest is now aching, knowing that it truly doesnât mean the same thing to him it does to you, but you know you canât. It wouldnât be fair, so once again, youâre left with a sinking heart wrapped up into Harryâs embrace that suddenly feels burning.
âGood night, Y/N.â
âGood night, Harry.â
When the morning comes Harry is still sleeping deep beside you, an arm thrown over your waist, puffing warm air against the side of your head with every breath he exhales. Seeing him so peaceful warms your heart, but then you realize everything that happened last night, how he only used you because you were available and not because he wanted you.
You donât want to wait for him to wake up and face him, your emotions would surely bring the best out of you. So carefully, you unwrap yourself from his hold and sneak out of his room, back into yours.
Thereâs no way you can face Harry right now, so before he could wake up you leave, planning on spending the day in the library, working on your assignments, hoping the school work will take your mind off of how badly youâve been friendzoned.
Sometime after eleven Harry actually texts you asking where you went and you just tell him you have a shitload of school stuff to deal with. He asks if he can join you, but you tell him youâre with a group of your classmates, even though youâre sitting in an almost entirely empty library. He luckily doesnât push it and leaves you to be. Hopefully heâll be fine when you take another step away from him for a while to get your head straight and sort your emotions out.
You get home quite late, but not late enough, apparently. Because walking into the house you find the boys clearly getting ready to watch a movie.
âJust in time!â Niall beams. âJoin us, Princess!â he laughs, grabbing himself a cola from the fridge.
âOh, no, I have some things to work on--â
âCome on, youâve been in the library all day, you can have a break!â Louis tells you and you know you wonât be left alone, they are just so persistent.
So you join them in your usual spot, which is of course next to Harry, though youâre trying to avoid his gaze that hasnât left you since you arrived and by now youâre certain he knows youâre avoiding him. Thereâs a reason why he asked you last night if youâve been doing it lately, he is not stupid, but this is not the time to deal with it.
With your inner crisis bubbling inside you, you completely forget to ask what youâre watching. A few minutes into the movie it becomes quite clear however.
âIs this a fucking horror movie again?â you ask, snapping at Niall, who just starts laughing.
âDonât worry, Iâm sure Harry will gladly let you sleep in his bed tonight,â he teases, making your whole face heat up at his comment. Harry slaps his chest before he turns to you with concern filled eyes, but you pretend like you see nothing, turning back to the screen with your jaw clenched.
Youâre fucked.
The movie is a fucking shitshow and leaves you traumatized. When itâs over, you think about why didnât you just stand up and go into your room when you realized itâs another horror. For a change, this one was filled with demons and monsters that hide in the shadows, just what you need before going to bed. In the night. In a totally dark room.
Exiting the bathroom youâre already planning on watching something lighthearted and cheerful in your room, hoping that would make you forget the movie you just saw and give you the chance to actually sleep.
Walking past Harryâs room you see that itâs still open and you catch him expectantly looking at you when you appear in the doorway as you walk down the hallway, your eyes meeting for just a split second before you disappear from his sight and shut your bedroom door without a word behind you.
No matter how many random videos you watch on YouTube, some scenes from the movie are just imprinted into your mind and they have you trembling in fear. Every shadow looks like a demon or ghost, hiding in your room, ready to haunt and kill you and youâre on the verge of actually crying. It might not be only because of the movie, more like everything else thatâs been bottled up inside you, added to the fear the movie has brought to you.
Shutting your eyes closed you try to take deep breaths and for a bit it actually seems to help, but that is until you hear the door opening. It gives you an instant heart attack and you canât keep your tears back anymore.
A whimper leaves your mouth as the door opens and you can only see a shadow entering the room, totally not recognizing Harry in the dark.
âY/N, hey, itâs just me! Itâs okay!â he quickly clears, seeing how shaken up you are. He rushes over to the bed, one hand cupping your cheek, the other one finding your hand and before you could think, you grip it hard.
âYou scared the living hell out of me!â you cry out, sobbing.
âIâm sorry, I just wanted to check on you.â
Silence sets between the two of you thatâs only momentarily broken by your shaky breaths as you try to calm yourself down.
âWhy didnât you come to mine after the movie if you were so scared?â he then asks, surprising you with how straightforward he is.
âI didnât want to bother you,â you mumble, blinking the remaining of the tears away as Harry stares down at you intently.
âWhy would you think youâd bother me? I like having you there.â
âBut itâs⊠Doesnât matter,â you sigh in defeat, but it just concerns him even more.
âNo, tell me!â
âHarry, just go back to your room. Iâll be fine.â
âYou definitely wonât and Iâm not leaving until you donât tell me whatâs going on,â he protests firmly and you lose your patience to keep lying to him.
âYou just wanted someone to sleep with yesterday, okay? You didnât need me. And⊠I donât want to depend on you more than I should.â
Harry stares back at you with a blank expression and you feel like this is going to be the end of your friendship. You have to come clean about your feelings and heâll tell you that he doesnât feel the same way. But then he speaks up and the tables turn faster than ever.
âY/N, I wanted you to sleep with me last night. Not just anyone. You.â
âWhat?â
âI really thought we have been on the same page, but apparently, weâre not even in the same book,â he sighs, confusing you even more. âWasnât it suspicious how things have been between us lately? The way we slept, the mornings, did you think these are normal things to do?â
âI-I thought that⊠it didnât mean anything to you.â
âWell it did,â he replies and you breath hitches in your throat. âI was trying to take it slow, see how youâd react to everything and I thought you were feeling the same way. But then last time you didnât come to my room when there was a storm and I thought that was your way of telling me that you want to pause whateverâs been going on.â
Youâre just blinking in shock, listening to his words. This is nothing you expected.
âBut then you seemed like you opened back up last night and you agreed to sleep with me, thought we were back on track, but then you were nowhere to be found in the morning, avoided me all day and now you would have rather spent the night crying here alone than to come over to me. What did I do? Just tell me, because quite frankly, I have no idea what we are doing anymore, Y/N,â he sighs, clearly tired of this insane game youâve been playing without even knowing.
âSo⊠you did all of this, because⊠youâŠâ
âBecause I like you, Y/N. But thereâs a possibility itâs already way more than just a strong liking,â he admits with a soft chuckle that melts you in an instant.
âOh god, I could cry again, but not out of fear this time,â you tell him, making him laugh as you scoot closer to him on the mattress. âI feel the same way, Harry,â you softly tell him, your hands finding the base of his neck while his hands have wandered to your waist so now he is pulling you towards him until he ends up in his lap. His face is now so close, and even in the dark, you can see the cheesy smile on his pink lips.
âYouâre not saying this just to keep me here because youâre scared to be alone, right?â he asks, clearly joking, earning a wholehearted laugh from you.
âNo, but I guess that would be a major benefit of it.â
âIâll protect you from all the demons and killers under one condition,â he smirks, his face already inching closer, his nose is already touching yours.
âYeah? And whatâs that?â
âI get to kiss you.â
âDeal.â
You barely say this one little word, his lips are already on yours, kissing you in a way that almost knocks all the air out of your lungs. You press yourself up against him, his arms curling around you, holding you tight as if he is already protecting you from everything that scares you, though you canât really think about the stupid horror movies now that youâre kissing Harry.
He pulls you down with himself making you lie on your back as he holds himself up above you, his lips parting from your just enough so he can look into your eyes.
âHow about I kiss you every time you feel scared?â he prompts, pecking your lips gently as you pull your legs up and his hips settle between your thighs, while your hands dance down his back.
âAlright, Iâm in,â you smirk at him and for a moment he just stares back at you, smiling wide, in complete awe that itâs finally happening. Then he cocks his head to the side before speaking up.
âAre you still scared?â
âVery,â you nod. âIâm shaking.â
âGood,â he grins before his lips press onto yours again.
Thank you for reading! Please like/reblog if you enjoyed!
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