#you jackals better not say anything weird

[couldoneimagine]

so it's springtime in Russia which means hooray the six months of awful cold are over and we can wear light jackets or hoodies

and I got this bad boy out

you can't see it but there's a W on it and the sleeves are all fucked cause they're shitty fake leather and I put it in the washing machine and it. did not bode well. so basically, considering that I'm watching Yellowjackets and the W is like Wiskayok and the sleeves being tattered kinda looks like I've been out in the wilderness

POINT IS

I posted this selfie to a few different places with the caption "if there was a teenage gay guy on the yellowjackets team (they're eating me first)"

and then I decided to take a yellowjackets quiz and

THEY REALLY ARE EATING ME FIRST.

[remuswriting]

READING THIRST TWEETS; MSBY BLACK JACKAL

Atsumu, Bokuto, Hinata, and Sakusa are invited to Buzzfeed to read thirst tweets, and they recognize a certain user. (plus the aftermath)

TAGS: Thirst Tweets (sexual); Not Beta-read; OOC probably; Male! Reader

WORD COUNT: 2,247 words

NOTES: This a part two to this post. This part is a mixture of writing and smau. I will say there is slight Atsuhina in this, but it's Atsumu pining essentially.

Translation for something Hinata says "Desde o primeiro momento que te vi, não consigo parar de pensar em você." From the moment I saw you, I can’t stop thinking of you. (I got this from a website, so please tell me if this is incorrect)

If Atsumu is going to be completely honest, he’s excited to read these thirst tweets.  He knows some people (Sakusa) find that weird, but he finds thirst tweets to be more funny than anything else.  Sometimes, the more deranged the better.  He and Osamu read thirst tweets while drunk at Onigiri Miya, so it’s not like he’s going to be wide eyed and stuttering about them today.  That’s probably why Kousaka, MSBY Black Jackal’s PR manager, put him in this; Buzzfeed Thirst Tweets.

“Have any of you watched these before?” Kousaka asks as people put light makeup on Atsumu.

“I have!” Shoyo says with a bright smile. “Kenma and I watched some after hearing about this.”

“Sakusa-san?” Kousaka asks, and Sakusa slowly nods.

“Yeah.  I’ve seen clips on TikTok,” Sakusa says, which it’s news to Atsumu that Sakusa even has TikTok.

“I’m not even going to ask you, Atsumu-san,” Kousaka says, not even looking at him. “Bokuto-san?”

“Nope!” Bokuto says, and his smile is just as vibrant as always, just like his volume being just a little too loud. “I know what thirst tweets are, though.”

Kousaka nods. “Alright, good.” He reaches over and picks up a bucket off of a stool. “This bucket has all the thirst tweets.  You’ll all take turns reading them, which means you may not read ones for yourself.” He hands it to Sakusa, who places it to be on the edge of his knee. “Do not start until after they’ve started filming and you’ve introduced yourselves.”

“Got it, Kousaka-san!” Shoyo says, and Kousaka smiles a little before taking a deep breath and gently releasing it.

“Let’s hope this goes well.”

Only 10 minutes later, everyone is situated and ready for filming.  Atsumu loves PR, which Kousaka knows and drags him around just about everywhere.  He’s not great with people, but he can be charming enough that it works out for him.  Kousaka doesn’t understand it, but he uses it whenever they need some PR.

“Behave,” Kousaka says, and then they’re filming.

“Hello, I’m Miya Atsumu.  Setter for MSBY Black Jackal,” Atsumu says with a smirk, and he’s not sure if he’s supposed to introduce himself like that.  It seems like a fun way, though.

“I’m Bokuto Koutaro! Wing spiker for MSBY Black Jackal!” Bokuto says, a little too loudly from excitement.  Kousaka puts a finger to his lips behind the camera to remind Bokuto to calm down a little.

“I’m Sakusa Kiyoomi.  Wing spiker for MSBY Black Jackal,” Sakusa says in a monotone voice.  He’s said he doesn’t want to be there, but Atsumu knows that Kousaka doesn’t force people to do things they don’t want to.  If Sakusa told him no, he wouldn’t be here.

“And I’m Hinata Shoyo!  Wing spiker for the MSBY Black Jackal!” Shoyo says with a bright smile.  He’s also someone Kousaka drags around for PR since he actually is good with people.  Atsumu is also always better when Shoyo is there as well. “And we’re here at BuzzFeed to read your thirst tweets!”

“Do you ever see thirst tweets online?” someone behind the camera asks.  Kousaka covers his face with a hand, which makes Atsumu and Shoyo laugh a little.

“Course,” Atsumu says, laughter still in his voice a little. “It’s what happens when you’re this attractive.”

“More like what happens when you look up your name to see if anyone is talking about you,” Sakusa says, and Atsumu rolls his eyes.  Sure, that’s exactly what he does, but he’s not going to admit to that.

“Do not.”

Sakusa narrows his eyes at him, and he’s not wearing a mask, making it easy to see his frown.  He’s just about always frowning, so Atsumu doesn’t take it to heart. “Then show us the last thing you looked up on Twitter then.”

Atsumu’s eyes go wide. “I don’t have to do that.”

“So you’re admitting you do it?” Sakusa asks, and he sounds so smug.

Atsumu opens his mouth, but Shoyo grabs the bucket from Sakusa’s knee and pulls a piece of paper out. “Please @bokutomsby I am but a hole for your using.”

“A hole?” Bokuto asks, processing what he just heard.  His eyes widen. “Oh! Thank you, but that doesn’t sound very enjoyable.”

 Atsumu rolls his eyes as he chuckles a little.

“How many tweets do you think will mention them being a hole?” Shoyo asks casually before looking up at Kousaka. “Where do I put this paper?” Someone quickly puts a trash can near them. “Thank you.”

“Too many,” Sakusa says.  He leans away from Shoyo—away from the bucket more like it.  If he’s acting like that now, then how will he act when the tweets start actually getting dirty?

“My turn,” Bokuto says, and Shoyo hands him the bucket.  Bokuto pulls a piece of paper out. “User sakukiyo says: I’d let Sakusa Kiyoomi fuck me on every surface possible and spit in my mouth if it meant I got to see those thighs up close and personal just so I could thank him.”

Sakusa cringes. “No thank you.  I think I’ll pass.”

“Sakusa-san,” Kousaka says, and Sakusa rolls his eyes.  Atsumu has seen this interaction a hundred times before.  Kousaka gets onto Sakusa and then Sakusa stops being such a stick in the mud. “Also, Bokuto-san, you don’t need to read out the username.”

“Oh, sorry,” Bokuto says, looking a little guilty, but a simple smile from Kousaka erases the expression.

“I want to read another,” Shoyo says, and Bokuto hands over the container to him. “Miya Atsumu needs to rail me disrespectfully. Please, I know how to beg,” Shoyo reads out, but it doesn’t sound like he’s just reading it.  It sounds like he’s saying it with his own words.  Atsumu’s heart is in his throat.  He cannot get horny during an interview.  Kousaka will murder him.

“Good thing I know how to be disrespectful,” Atsumu says, trying to sound seductive.  Shoyo laughs beside him. “Hope all of these are that good.”

“Well dailyln only gives the best thirst tweets,” Shoyo says, and Atsumu wonders if they’re going to bleep out the username.  A lot of Y/N’s followers will already know which tweets are his, even though Atsumu doesn’t.  He’s seen the tweets, but he doesn’t remember who tweets what. “I wonder how many of his tweets will be in here.”

“Hopefully only one,” Sakusa says. “Atsumu’s already cocky enough.”

Atsumu rolls his eyes as he takes the bucket from Shoyo. “I want Hinata Shoyo to smash my skull between his thighs like a watermelon,” Atsumu reads.  All of them look at Shoyo’s thighs.

Shoyo flexes his thighs, and Atsumu has to remind himself that he’s not allowed to get horny in an interview. “I don’t know if my thighs are that strong,” Shoyo says, and he tilts his head. “I’ve never even tried to smash a watermelon before.”

“You should try!” Bokuto says, and Atsumu can’t wait to hear the end of this. “Last New Year’s I did it because Akaashi dared me.”

Atsumu doesn’t know Akaashi super well.  Osamu knows Akaashi far better than he does, but Atsumu knows Akaashi is just a little weird.  Bokuto either doesn’t know it or ignores it.  What Atsumu is getting at is that it’s so believable that happened.

“Did you take videos or pictures?” Shoyo asks, looking at Bokuto with wide eyes over Atsumu’s shoulder.

“Yeah!  I’ll have to show you them later!”

“Boys,” Kousaka says.  He always has to remind them to stay on task when Bokuto comes along.  Atsumu looks at Sakusa, who grumbles slightly as he takes the container and gets a piece of paper out.

“I never know what Hinata Shoyo is saying when he speaks Portuguese, but fuck does he sound good,” Sakusa reads off, not sounding entirely monotone but not putting his all into it.  Atsumu feels like he could’ve ghost written that.

Shoyo grins at the camera, but it’s a little feral.  It’s one of Atsumu’s favorite smiles on Shoyo.  It’s the one he has after a really good spike. “Really?” Shoyo asks, and Atsumu knows he’s about to be fucked. “Desde o primeiro momento que te vi, não consigo parar de pensar em você.”

Shoyo’s voice deepens slightly when speaking Portuguese, and Atsumu grips the side of his chair.  He’s so gay.  Fuck.  He is so gay.  Gay panicking in public should be something he’s used to by now, but he’s not God’s strongest soldier.

“That one was also Y/N,” Sakusa says as he leans over to throw the piece of paper away. “Just in case you wanted to know.”

Sakusa leans over Shoyo to hand Atsumu the bucket to hand to Bokuto.  Shoyo leans back a little, and it’s a simple exchange.  Bokuto takes the bucket from Atsumu with a smile as he pulls out a piece of paper. “Oh, to taste tsumu’s thighs as they’re wrapped around my head like earmuffs. Finally, some good fucking food,” Bokuto reads, and Atsumu’s thirst tweets seem to rival Sakusa’s in being slightly cruder.

“Glad I’m being appreciated for the meal I am,” Atsumu says with a grin, and he’s trying to ignore the way Shoyo is staring at him.  It’s his hungry stare, and Atsumu can only handle so much before he has a gay breakdown.

“I feel so bad for those who have terrible taste,” Sakusa says with a soft sigh, as if to make it more sympathetic. “Hopefully, their taste buds are fixed soon.”

“Oh, fuck you,” Atsumu says, but there’s no real bite in it.  Honestly, he finds it a little funny with how Sakusa said it.  He should be upset, but part of him can’t be from the comedy of it.

Sakusa simply rolls his eyes before extending a hand for them to give him the bucket.  He’s quick with pulling out the paper.  Atsumu only saw two left when he briefly looked as he passed it on.

“My ideal weight is Bokuto on top of me,” Sakusa reads out, and he looks over at Bokuto, who is laughing.

“If I lay on you, then I may crush you,” Bokuto says, which Atsumu can believe.  Bokuto is mainly made of muscle and weighs the most out of the four of them.  He’s just built thick.

“I think that’s what they want Bokuto-san,” Shoyo says, and Bokuto nods.

“Then I guess I should lay on them, shouldn’t I?” he asks, and Atsumu watches Kousaka close his eyes and let out a deep breath.  He should’ve expected this when he brought Bokuto to this.

“I think they’d love that,” Shoyo says, and Bokuto grins.  Shoyo turns to Atsumu. “Atsumu-san gets to read the last one!”

Atsumu takes the bucket when it’s passed to him.  He hopes it’s something filthy.  That’s probably a strange want, but he’s having a little fun.  He’s having gay panic, but also having fun.

“I need to see what Sakusa Kiyoomi’s wrists are capable of. Please I’ll be so good, just give me a chance,” Atsumu reads aloud, and Sakusa rolls his eyes.

“What are your wrists capable of, Omi-san?” Shoyo asks, and some would think he’d ask it innocently, but he doesn’t.  Atsumu hears the plotting in it.  Sakusa and Shoyo share a look before Sakusa is bending his wrists to where his fingers comfortably press against the skin of his wrist.

“I guess they’re capable of this,” Sakusa says, and it always amazed Atsumu that Sakusa’s wrists are that flexible.  He’s watched him stretch them every day at practice, but still.  It’s unnatural.

Shoyo turns to the crew. “Isn’t there another one?” he asks with excitement. “One that’s just awful?  You gave one to Dylan O’Brien.”

Apparently, Shoyo hadn’t been lying when he said he watched some of these with Kenma.

Kousaka shakes his head a little. “I don’t know if that’s the best idea, Hinata-san.”

Shoyo pouts. “Please,” he says, dragging out the word. “If it’s too bad, I won’t read it aloud.”

Kousaka nods, and someone gives Shoyo a piece of paper.  He holds it close to himself so Atsumu can’t read it.  His concentrated expression melts, and he’s laughing.  He’s full on cackling, and none of them know why.

“Definitely can’t read that one aloud,” he says as he crumbles it and throws it in the trash. “But it was good.”

They say their goodbyes and are back in the car.  Curiosity keeps eating at Atsumu over what the last one was that made Shoyo laugh like that.  He’s not sure he’s ever seen him laugh like that before.

“What was so funny about the last tweet?” Bokuto asks for Atsumu.

Shoyo looks up from his phone at Bokuto. “I don’t know if I’d say it was funny.  It was more like laughing was the only way to respond to it,” Shoyo says with a shrug. “But it was basically about an orgy between that person and us.”

If Atsumu had been drinking something, he would’ve spit it out all over Sakusa’s face. “They included something like that?” Atsumu asks, bewildered.

“Well, I had to ask for it, so it wasn’t really included,” Shoyo says with a small laugh. “It was detailed, though.  I didn’t know someone would think that hard about something like that.”

Atsumu nods, trying to get his mind around someone tweeting that.  The tweets they read aloud weren’t terrible, but that one is something else.  Eventually they’re talking about the upcoming game against the EJP Raijin.  Everyone has people they want to beat, and Atsumu is ready to take down Suna.  He imagines Suna is thinking the same thing about him (hopefully).

[umbreonkin197]

Journal of a Questioning Otherkin (Entry 7)

I've been growing more comfortable with seeing myself as an alterhuman more consistently, but that hasn't really done much to fix the doubts about my specific identity or the species dysphoria/dysmorphia I've been dealing with. I guess progress happens in little steps.

A big thing I've been struggling with is feeling this weird sense of awkwardness/embarrassment from expressing my nonhuman side around trusted individuals. It's like, they're fully supportive and it makes me genuinely euphoric being treated like an animal, but there's still some part of me that says I'm being childish and that makes me feel like it's something I shouldn't be wanting. I'm doing my best to work past that, but I just feel like I should acknowledge it in my journaling too.

After a previous post, some comments let me know about fictherians/fictotherians and I'm super grateful for that! I feel like that fits me so much better than just standard fictionkin. Another little step forward.

Though I'm wondering, if I AM an Umbreon, does that mean some small part of me is or was an Eevee as well? I mean it makes sense, and in a way I do feel like a small little guy who has the potential to become so much but is struggling at the crossroads of what path to choose. Perhaps I'm overthinking it too much. But regardless, Eevee sounds very plausible all things considered, even if it's simply just that as an Umbreon, I was once an Eevee. Maybe part of me still is that Eevee. I don't know how this works. Below is a relevant image-

In terms of my wolf identity, I'm still not quite sure if that is in addition to my Umbreon self or on top of it, or maybe just close enough to it that I feel connected? I know I CAN be both, but my brain is so irrationally afraid of taking on "too many" thereotypes at once and I stress out about it.

There's a different question I've had though. Am I specifically a wolf? I realized that I only gravitate towards wolf because it's what I'm most familiar with. In all likelihood, I'm fairly certain that my true self is some form of canid or canid-like creature, but I've been curious about doing some deeper research into different species of canids and seeing if any of them click. I don't know really anything about dholes and dingoes and jackals and the like, so it's hard for me to say at the moment. Maybe I'll find something there that resonates much more deeply than wolf, but wolf is just the best word I have for it at the moment. Who knows.

One last side thought, I really want to start looking into therian gear. I know it's not required to be valid, but I genuinely do feel like it might help me combat the feelings of dysphoria I have. I want a collar so bad. Do any of you guys know good places to look online for therian made therian gear? Not just a collar, but therian related gear in general? I don't mind paying more if I'm supporting smaller creators, especially if it's someone inside of the therian community. I would love to support that while also supporting my real self.

Anyways, small steps forward to feeling comfortable about myself. Maybe it isn't as big as I would like, but it's steps forward nonetheless.

Take care, until next time. -Bre

[i-eat-deodorant]

Weird question for you 👉👈 do you have any drawings of the lamb or narinder like, naked? NOT in a horny way I SWEAR, I love your style and I just wanna see how you draw their legs lmao, I can't figure it out myself and other artists I can find are like, too human.

(nakey animals ahead)

Okay, so to preface this I'm a hobbyist artist who commits anatomical atrocities for shits & giggles, and this is by no means a professional/accurate way to draw animals, humans, or any combination of the two. This started as me struggling to explain how I draw instead of just sticking to the most brutally honest explanation of "I just wing it", but having to draw out different parts of anatomy and how proportional they are to each other was hugely helpful to help me re-evaluate how I draw animals. So thank you.

I'll be mostly using Lamb and Narinder for reference, because the brainrot is strong and they're what I draw the most.

A lot of my style comes from the fact that I'm primarily an animal artist, not a human one. In fact, COTL's the first fandom that I've drawn anthro characters in, and it was a trial trying to adapt what I know to upright animals.

Best way to get a better grip on anatomy is to sketch from references. Nothing that can really replace practice. It's helpful to look at skeleton and muscle diagrams and get a good idea of where body parts are in relation to each other. Then, search up actual references and try to overlay the shapes and bones onto them. When I'm not sure if something of mine is proportioned correctly, I just measure something with my fingers and compare.

Some specific things to note: generally, the hind legs of quadrupeds have a larger metatarsal area (the large flat portion of your foot) compared to humans--that's why people say cats tip-toe. Humans have theirs relatively short; how long you make that area largely determines how Creature the design looks. I know some people who draw purely human legs, some who draw human legs then add the extra foot length on top, all of that's fine. Personally, I will shorten the leg length above the knee to compensate. In quadrupeds, the knee will draw up very close to the torso area, as you can see in the jackal doodle.

Another note: when standing, it's important give the impression that there's a center of balance. When standing straight, a straight line drawn from the hip to the foot of a leg should be relatively perpendicular to the ground.

(Of course this all goes out the window the moment anything other than standing straight is involved but w/e.)

A lot of the fundamentals carry over between my quadruped and anthro art: the general shapes, the proportions, etc. One thing I noticed while sketching Lamb is that sheep have a femur that's almost entirely against their torso, and their legs are mostly just the tarsal parts (sorry if I'm butchering the anatomy).

For the arms/forelimbs, I mainly just use human anatomy with a repurposed number of fingers. It's easier, plus I can't exactly have a sheep with sheep limbs carry an axe around. I mean it's doable, just kinda awkward.

After getting the basics down, I move to more complex poses. One thing I struggle massively with is anything involving knees--kneels were something that eluded me for months. There are things that humans do that look very awkward when you factor in other animals' anatomies. I'm not super good with action poses so I can't really say how I've overcome that limitation, because I haven't :'D.

When I'm doing more simplistic poses, I just result resort to drawing a slightly bent line and calling it a day. You don't see much outside clothing anyways.

Last thing I found interesting: because of the weight distribution, the positioning of the arms in relation to the torso is different in bipeds and quadrupeds. Drawing anatomy with arms that kinda come forward and legs spread apart give designs a more animalistic vibe to me.

[crowtrobotx]

your most recent fic destroyed me and now i HAVE to ask— how do you think the chrysalis story/maybe just lottie in general would turn out if she was raised by kris? if something happened to karl but maybe they’re still stuck in the village. obv don’t spoil anything you don’t want to but that little thought experiment killed me.

OHHHH MY GOD Jackal you really do ask the best questions. I had to think about this for a while! It’s funny bc Karl & Lottie are such a package deal in my head and I’m just like… Do Not separate them. Like so much of her personality is just wrapped up in being his horrible little clone and constant shadow that cutting her out of that picture seems almost impossible.

HOWEVER. I can think of several scenarios where they might end up apart (minus him straight up dying bc that isn't fun!!! I say as if what I'm about to talk about is any better lmao.) Like, minor spoiler but this won't happen (obviously) because Reasons - I imagine Karl would want to pay off the Duke to whisk Kris out of the Village before Lottie is born (whether it's because they realize their WHOOPSIE or it's coincidental.) And maybe it happens and Kris of course doesn't hear from him for ~7 years and she forgets a lot of the finer details of his face and his voice doesn't come so easily to mind anymore. And then he does escape and he does get his freedom ending and he finds her and whatever you do, do not think about Karl seeing Lottie for the first time after never knowing her especially in the scenario where he didn't realize she existed oh my god oh mY GOD--

Anyway. To your actual question: I would like to think most of Lottie's gremlin nature is just inherent. It's in the damn HeisenDNA. Like, no matter her circumstances she's always going to be a weird little girl who's a little too into the concept of cybernetic enhancements and bugs and rats. And Kris, being a former weird little girl herself, would definitely support her - but given that particularly the mechanics/engineering part are NOT in her area of expertise, I think she'd have to rely way more on teachers or outside sources to help that part of her blossom. She'd be the mom at the science fair nodding along enthusiastically like she knows what the hell anyone is saying while internally her brain is turning into soup. Would that effect Lottie negatively? I don't really think so, but it might make her less attached because she'd have to seek... enrichment further away from home lol. There’s also the issue of Lottie’s lil magnet powers. Kris would not know what to do with that/how to relate at all obviously. I think that’d cause a whole host of problems - not necessarily resentment on Lottie’s part bc she’d still think it was Neat but I also can’t help but think they’d be more chaotic or out of control after a point. I think it would fuck her up a little bit being the odd one out with no one to relate to and it might make her a bit mad at the world. :( I definitely am inclined to believe Kris would have a metric shitton of anxiety about keeping her away from folks who'd want to study her like a lab rat or worse use her for their goals, and as the child of an extremely obsessive compulsive parent I can tell you that it does rub off and can make you extremely paranoid. Like, Lottie's probably got her own little conspiracy board by age 5 in this scenario lol. Kris only knows protecc, attacc, and panic attacc.

Also, I’m truly trying to avoid saying “she’d be a bit kinder/more thoughtful” bc it feels like gender stereotyping but also Karl is Karl and the bar is on the floor lmao. Kris isn't nice but she does more or less recognize when people deserve kindness. I don't think she'd be better or worse off, overall. But she'd be different, as any of us would. I think what you'd end up with is a more subdued but still slightly feral little mischief maker who is more cognizant of other people's needs and wants but possibly less... funny and over the top in her pursuits as a result lol. I'll let you decide if that's a good or bad thing. Anyway. I'm now thinking too hard about that first scenario I described because you planted the seed lol. Hmmm.

[pacdevil]

5, 13, 20! :] infinite asks be upon you

hiiihihii thanks for the ask<222 sorry for the wait kfksks,,

5. what kind of dynamic do you think he had with his team?

i'd like to feel that he'd find it hard to connect with them on a personal level, since the stress of their looming situation keeps him from ever relaxing or letting his guard down at all. he'd be civil with them, albiet very short and unforgiving most of the time. since this isn't the sort of place to be reckless.

13. how do you think he got the scar?

so i kinda have two answers for this one. one being just generally what i think outside my own headcannon, and then my hc <2 (that me and @lea-andres talked about some time ago)

so generally, i don't think it's a scar at all. unless his skin is actually a pure white colour, it's more likely fur that had some weird dna fuckery going on so it grew in white instead of black.

but for my personal headcannon: both him and shadow gave each other scars across opposite eyes. post 06 and pre forces, sometime around there, shadow's doing recon for a mission which involves the jackal squad. there's a confrontation, and both shadow and the leader are left evenly matched, having scarred each other. but the leader doesn't back down, and calls shadow a coward when they're called back to base. the jackal leader leaves feeling victorious, having left shadow to contemplate learning to hone and control their powers better, and gain some more skill outside of their now more predictable moves.

20. what do you think he wants more than anything else? does it align with what he says?

short answer: he desires to not just survive, but to live his way, without being shackled or restricted by the world around him.

because like, all his life he's always been in a state of survival. always trying to get enough cash to buy food and supplies, or robbing those for it. the constant stress of having to keep track of supplies, keeping the squad in line and satisfied (mostly), etc etc. leaving very little time, if at all, for him to actually live his life without having to struggle to keep himself breathing, fed, hydrated, sane. he'd feel the world is always against him, pulling him down at any chance it gets. but he's resilient, fighting back whatever challenge and struggle the world throws at him.

and maintaining this strength takes time and effort, that he'd be more than willing to do. he takes pride in it, honing his skills and talents to his limits, and pushing father still. because the world will be harsh and unforgiving towards him, so he must keep growing stronger else he'll be swallowed whole by it.

but his drive and desire to keep fighting would slowly be whittled down over years and years. to the point where he's unsure of what he wants out of life anymore, since no matter what he does he's never pulled himself out of this state of constant survival. so when he's offered a chance from eggman: he sees an opportunity to change his life. free himself from the old world that keeps him chained down, and carving out a new one where he can finally live his life, his way. and the world will accept this reality, no matter what he has to do to it.

i'd say more but i'd be getting off topic and just start talking about his character in general kcjdjskskska,,,

[one-winged-dreams]

sliiiides in for 3+5 for ur boys 👀👀

@jackals-ships

LET'S GOOOOO

Angst: If someone wanted to break you two up, what was the one thing they could say that would be guaranteed to sow seeds of doubt? And, have you ever spoken to one another about such a moment?

For Azul: The Tsviets are... VERY strange about their comradery. They aren't necessarily all that close, so Sol and Azul's... Whatever, is very odd in regards to behavior. Sol would absolutely understand if Azul didn't even actually like him, but he doesn't care. He's got this weird aberrant obsession with him, Azul being fond of him is just a bonus. And for Azul... There really isn't anything that could be said to break them up because THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IT IS THEY HAVE.

For Vincent: God, the potential for this is so vast, but also so limited. For me, it's like... "You know you don't know nearly what VINCENT when through. What if he resents you for that?" And for him, it would be "What if you're just not cut out for love? Who's to say you won't ruin what you have NOW?" ... Or something, idk. We'd DEFINITELY be the type to talk it out, though akjsdhg

Your FO has upset you (perhaps because of the above) and now wants to make amends. How do they do it? And has this changed over time as they’ve gotten to know you better?

I got this number twice so I'm gonna do Vincent for this one and Azul for the next one.

I'm contradicting what I said in that last ask and making this about Vincent having one of THOSE moments and being like "I don't think you should be so close to me. I don't have a history of being good for anyone." and me just kind... FUMING that he thinks that way and probably get unreasonably upset like "So you really think I'm the type of person to just walk away, huh?" Vincent would probably have an 'oh shit' moment, and take a moment of introspection before seeking me out and talking about how he does not and will never think that of me, it's just painful sometimes. He gets stuck in these moments of weakness and he doesn't know what to do. And then ask me to be there to help him and how can I NOT? Any sign of him wanting to better himself is an instant win-me-over.

[atangledfate]

It was Sonic turn to shift after all being in the war and beaten by a new threat - Infinite had been the toucgest enemy back then. Eggman was Eggman he was use to the daily tricks but Infinite taking him away making everyone assume he's dead. Not the mention being locked up until his friends found him. Comparing that defeat to Jet fights, he had preferred and enjoyed their banter too. Just not out for the others death.

"Even you wasn't happy I lost to him? I don't want to ruin the talk - serious as it is but man.. it makes me happy to hear me being around pushes you to reach and push forward, further." Another smug smirk but his eyes are soft a look of acceptance and respect he never shown Jet ever at all. This still felt weird to openly talk. He gave a half hearted glare looking away in annoyance. "You say it like our banter going to just stop. Don't make me say it.. That I liked our banter too. It became my normal daily or monthly drama really..Ah yeah him--Maybe worse who knows. If you're the thief and rival in this time and there was an anti you in Scourges… would you be a Hero? That's a scary thought." Sonic trails off stepping forward arms crossing he knows the topic he just asked was serious so to lighten Jet stress or not the Hero started to joke after all thats why he was here in the first place. "Lets not forget the previous questions at you Jet. You thought this lame Hero or not was attractive. And suure that doesn't mean anything but i can't be that lame for you too consider that question with an answer, am i wrong?" Waving a hand off topic to let the other know there was no malice or pressure in his teasing.

"..Well that makes more sense. I mean it was you but you couldn't help..it? And yeah you was in a dark place i am not going to hold onto that anymore, the past is the past. If you was the same him as…back then yeah you and i would be this that constant loop of anger and hatred..On both sides." Sonic had been looking at Jet again so he did not miss the fearful look. "Jet. You don't need that type of gear anywhere near you to be the best. We want a fair race dob't we? You said it yourself it almost had you kill others and make you doubt your own loyal team. Leave it locked up not because i'm personally requesting you do. But As your rival i don't want you in the head space if we are to race in the future, no tricks no games just us reaching for a brighter and better future yeah?"

"I never make promises i can't keep i'll make sure it's the best baguette you'll have." He grinned.

His head shifted to one side as he had a softer look in his eyes. For a long time all he could think about was beating Sonic. His entire life revolved around it, to the point of absolute obsession! He wanted to be the best back then, well he still did. But not to the detriment of everyone around him. Losing to Sonic messed him up---no wrong his Father had. His demand that he beat sonic or kiss his blood right goodbye. He turned his desire to win into a life or death game! Being banished from Babel still scared him.

" Just Between us? When i thought Infinite killed you... i'd never been so pissed in my life. I was angry that you let yourself die, i was angry this jackass took away my chance to settle things... but i guess deep down... i was sad i'd never see your stupid smile again..."

He looked away again and his eyes were far more somber then before.

" I realized in that moment, this thing between us meant more to me then just Victory. I enjoyed what we had... as fucked up as it was at times... you gave me a reason to keep going--- and i was so angry that dumb jackal took that away. Hell i even tried to kill him myself... blew up in my face, ended up in the infirmary for awhile..."

Her rolled his eyes at sonic but he even smiled a little bit.

" An yea... i missed yer stupid jokes, and your god awful puns! but i'm glad to have it bad... glad that we'll get to share some quips in the future..."

He grumbled at Sonic asking about the attractive question--- Ancestors save him he was going to regret ever saying it. But yea Blue was hot as fuck. he never say it in public, fuck he hated even thinking it in his head---but it was true.

" ...yer not gonna let that go are you? look if this is about me liking men---fuck right off! yea i like men--- is that a problem? and yea... maybe i think yer blue face is kissable! but if that leaves this room i'm going to kick yer scrawny blue ass! "

His eyes did shift when talking about that gear. It was hard to explain, it was like it was ingrained in his DNA. That thing changed him, made him love it, want it, yearn for it. It was still in his head, sometimes he'd stop in front of the case and just stare at it like it was some long lost lover he just couldn't abandon. Sonic didn't know what that was like, maybe its a good thing he didn't.

" Don't worry... i'm done with that thing... if i'm gonna win it'll be with my own skills, my own abilities. I don't need that thing... plus i made Wave and Storm Promise to keep it away from me... that person you fought years ago is gone...for good "

[yourstarvic]

Summary: Starting a new job is always exciting. Especially with it's taking care of four hungry Jackals. So, here you are, working your way with their crazy antics but at least you got free food.

Pairing: MSBY Jackals x Manager!reader, no romantic pairs...(yet? Still thinking about it...Maybe do a poll? Let me know what ya'll think)

Prev - Masterlist - Bonus- Next

You mouth was gapped open in shock. You hands hovered your plate, pausing the cut of your food. The only word that you were able to say was, “What?”

The man in front of you nodded his head at you, taking a bit of his food with a close eye smile. You blinked once. Twice. Third time. “Did you do all of this,” you said very slowly, calculating your next words, “because you wanted me to say that?” Setting your utensils down, you sighed, wondering how such an perfect day lead to you, sitting across from Miya Atsumu. 

Arriving at the training center, went straight to the locker room to changing into the the usual uniform of joggers and a polo shirt hat had the teams logo on the upper corner with the team’s colors. You chatted with the rest of the managers, catching up the many things that happened over the weekend. Soon after, once you all chatted and changed, you all started your assigned work. Few will grab the freshly clean towels, few would fill water bottles, while the rest set up the court. Everything to make the players practice to their full potential.

With everything done setting up, you leaned against the wall reviewing the notes you took over the players. Flipping over the pages, you reviewed each thing that you need to watch out for during practice. 

“Mornin’, (L/n). Whatcha lookin’ at?”

“Morning Miya,” You greeted the setter with a wide smile, inviting him to look over your notes. “Looking over some stuff to keep an eye out.”

Awing at the notes in front of him, he read through the page, looking for anything to tease Sakusa with. But when he saw his name, he couldn’t help but read the notes you had over him. “Whatcha mean my sets could be better!” Atsumu whined, looking at you in betrayal. 

“Finish reading the sentence before you start whining,” You rolled your eyes. “You’re sets are great, just whenever you need to go low, your sets aren’t as steady as they normally are. You can do better.”

“His personality?” Sakusa joined, seeing you showing notes to Atsumu, made him wanted to see notes about him. “It can do better.”

“My personality is amazin’!” Atsumu huffed.

“Good morning, Sakusa-San,” You greeted him. Having a feeling as to why he willingly joined the conversation. You didn’t noticed how Atsumu perked as greeted the wing spiker, taking the clipboard away from Atsumu as you then started to show Sakusa, telling him things you noticed and ways that could help him improved.

“What are you looking at?” 

“That doesn’t matter,” Atsumu waved off Bokuto and Hinata, “do ya think my low sets can be better?”

“They could use some improvement.”

“I have been telling you that.”

“It sometimes feels weird when I hit it.”

“I’ve failed as a setter,” Atsumu said in a defeated manner. A gloom expression loomed over him as he rethought of his sets. 

Chuckling at the his antics, you looked away at Atsumu fallen demeanor. Looking at the two who now joined the conversation, you smiled at them, “Morning Bokuto-San, Hinata- San. Want to look over your notes?”

Quickly agreeing to it, the both peaked over Sakusa’s shoulder, reading their notes and agreeing to a few things that were written, once again ignoring Atsumu ears perked. The five of you, talking over it, giving out tips to help improve each of them as a player. Until you were called over by the coaches, you took the clipboard away from them before walking to see what the coaches needed.

The three Jackals talk amongst themselves about their plays and techniques, while one stayed silent. Lips pursed into a tight lip, eyes following you are you walked away with narrowed eyes. “How come she only calls me Miya?” Atsumu intruding on their conversation, leaning his arm on Bokuto. “She all adds San to y’all, but not me.”

Annoyed, Sakusa face scrunched up, “You’re bothered by that? When you-” 

Glaring at him, Atsumu crossed his arms, stopping before he finished, “It’s just not fair. She all adds San to ya and I’m just Miya. Not even my first name, or nickname. Just Miya.”

“She’s casual with you,” Hinata tried to ease him. “There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“It’s a respect thing!” Atsumu yelled. “She should be callin’ me San. And I’m older than her-”

“Isn’t she older than you?” Bokuto added, but it fell on death ears.

“And basically her boss.” Atsumu finished with a huff. To which all three of them instantly disagreed with him, while Atsumu ignored him. “I promise you, before the end of the day, she will be saying San!”

“Let’s make a bet,” Sakusa smirked, looking at the setter with a cock expression. Hinata and Bokuto looked looked intrigued, leaning in as they wanted to listen to the stakes. “If you don’t get (L/n) to add San to your name by the end of the day, you post how Kageyama is a better setter than you.”

Bokuto and Hinata stared at the germaphobe in shock, knowing how big the stakes were for Atsumu if he were to lose. “Omi-Kun,” Hinata blinked, “there’s no way Tsumu going to-”

“Kay.” Atsumu nodded in agreement. Bokuto and Hinata both yelled in confusion, snapping their necks towards their setter as Atsumu took his hands out for a handshake “But if I win, ya have to high five me ever’ time ya get a point the next game.”

“Deal,” Sakusa agreed, shaking his hand in agreement and then shaking his hands away, muttering a quick, “Need to wash my hands.”

The owl blinked at the setter, who looked accomplished at the unfair deal that he accepted, “How are you going to get her to add San, Tsumu?”

Looking at the spikers, Atsumu winked at him with a thumbs up, “I have no idea.”

It’s going to be a long day.

Throughout the day, Atsumu did his best on hinting to you to add San. Every time you call out his name, he would instantly say San. Hoping for you to catch on. You did hear him saying San immediately as you said his name, but you only scrunched your eyebrows in confusion or ignored him. At each breaks, he would talk to you how important to respect someone and the why the usage of San is important. To which you responded with, “Miya, are you really mansplaining this to me right now?”

That made Sakusa to snorted out a laughter, seeing how Atsumu quickly apologized in a flustered state as he realized that made him look bad. Hinata and Bokuto, who already spread the bet to their teammates, had their own little bet to see whether or not you were going to add it. Also, adding another bet whether or not you would find out about the original bet. 

“Sakusa-San, Bokuto-San, Hinata-San, Miya,” You called out. With the four man jogging over to you, they waited for you to tell them what was on your mind. “I need to ask you all for a favour.”

“Whatcha need, (L/n)-San,” Atsumu eyed you in a nudge, wanting you to get the hint.

“Please, don’t do any extra practice after practice,” You begged with pleading eyes, your hands grasping in front of you. “Ren got a reservation to this really nice restaurant for tonight and I really want to go, so please, can you do this one thing for me?”

“Sure thing!” Bokuto smiled, while the others nodded and hummed in agreement. “Enjoy your night out!”

“Where he takin’ ya?” Atsumu asked, leaning in interested. 

Humming at you thought back to the name of the restaurant, you taped your finger to your chin, “I think it’s called Capital Grille? It supposed to be nice and classy.”

“Capital Grille,” Atsumu said slowly, nodding his head as he hummed with a purse lips as he was in deep in thought.

“Okay,” You said slowly, wondering if Atsumu was sick after his weird behaviors all day. “Well, thank you all for doing this for me! You’re the best!” You smiled before walking back to the rest of the mangers and coaches.

“What was that?” Sakusa asked, blinking at the setter.

“I,” Atsumu puffed his chest out as he gave him a two finger salute, “got a date tonight.”

Sakusa blinked at him once, twice, and then scrunched his face up in disgust, “…You are an annoying person.”

Nothing could go wrong, you thought as you walked next to your boyfriend, leading you to the restaurant. The black dress you wore for the occasion hanged off of you beautiful with the accessories that cling on your neck and wrist. Everything was perfect. 

So why is Mita Atsumu standing outside the restaurant?

“Yo!” He waved with a sly smile, hiding it over an welcoming tone, “manager-san! Funny seeing you here!”

“What are you doing here?” You ignored your boyfriend confusion, walking straight up to the blonde. 

“I got a date!”

“At the same place I told you where I was going to be?”

“Is this the place?” He laughed, forgiven innocence written on his face. “No wonder I thought about it.”

“Miya-“

“San.”

“Miya,” you pled through gritted teeth, “not when I’m off-”

“Who’s this?” 

“I’m (Y/n) boyfriend,” your boyfriend introduced himself to the Jackal. He eyed the blonde in front of him, wondering why an annoying man knew you. Puffing his chest out, the suddenness of wanting to protect and passiveness showing through his demeanour. “Kanto Ren, nice to meet you.”

Atsumu looked between you and your boyfriend, sucking his lips in he tried to find the right words to say. Ignoring the passiveness looking in Kanto’s eyes, he bent at the waist to come level to your face. He also ignored the shaking of your head and the look in your eye that whispered and plead to whatever he was planning to say, to shut it. A loud whispered, hiding behind a hand that the words that was only for your ears but purposing wanting your boyfriend to hear, “He’s shorter than you?”

“Miya-”

“San.”

“He is not short,” You whispered, rolling your eyes at your setter. “I am just wearing heels.”

“I’m aware,” He winked at you, standing back to his full height, sending a cocky smirk to your boyfriend who was fuming next to you, holding it in with close fist. A disappointment huff, escaped your mouth, hands massaging your bridge of your nose as Atsumu looking down at his expense watch, “My date is supposed to be here soon. Say,” a scheming smile appeared sinfully on his handsome face. “Why don’t we eat dinne’ together?”

Kanto arm went around your waist to pull you closer to him in a assertive manner, “It’s a date night, we would rather to spend time-”

“My treat.”

“It’ll be rude to deny,” Your boyfriends assertive manner disappeared at the offer. Letting go of your waist and joining Atsumu, talking as if they were friends. As your boyfriend stared to enter the restaurant, Atsumu turned to look at your still shocked expression, seeing how quickly your boyfriend shifted for free food. 

“You comin’? Table is ready.”

Shaking out of shocked expression, your creased your eyebrows at him, “What about your date?”

“What date?”

Here you were, sitting in a fine dining establishment. Your boyfriend of one years sitting next to you as he chatted with the annoying blonde that sat across from your from the table. You barely focused on whatever they were talking about, trying to think what the setter was thinking. The reservation that Atsumu had was already for three, not two, he denied saying he had a date, and he kept kept giving you a weird look whenever you talk to him. You kept going to one conclusion: he’s guilty of something. You just need to find out what.

Durning the middle of dinner, your boyfriend excused himself as his phone rang, needing to answering the call. Leaving you and Atsumu at the table. Atsumu rested his chin on his knuckle, a grin plastered on his face as you looked back at him with cautious narrowed eyes. “What did you do?”

“Don’t know what ya talking abou’.”

“Miya,-“

“San”

“What. Did. You. Do?”

“Just tryi’ to spend some time with ya,” His grin turned into a feline smile. “Not fair ya got to hang with ever’one but me”

“Miya.”

“San”

Creasing your eyebrows, you stared at the faux blonde. Thoughts of what Atsumu could have done ran through your head. Atsumu stared at you, seeing the puzzlement in your eyes flickering beneath them, hoping shining through his. “Why are you saying-”

The waiter arriving with your food stopped you from finishing, placing by the warm plate in front of you. Not waiting for you boyfriend to return, Atsumu quickly began eating, savor the food in his mouth with a childlike smile. “Ya know,” Atsumu gleamed at the moment you placed a piece of food in your month. “Since I’m paying for this, you kinda owe me.”

“You offered,” you gave him a dry look.

“That’s why, just this once — on camera,” Atsumu smirked, “You say, “Miya-San is the greatest setter ever,” and ya don’t have to pay me back.”

You mouth was gapped open in shock. You hands hovered your plate, pausing the cut of your food. The only word that you were able to say was, “What?”

The man in front of you nodded his head at you, taking a bit of his food with a close eye smile. You blinked once. Twice. Third time. “Did you do all of this,” you said very slowly, calculating your next words, “because you wanted me to say that?” Setting your utensils down, you sighed, wondering how such an perfect day lead to you, sitting across from Miya Atsumu. 

“I’ll do anything!” His cocky demeanor quickly morphed into desperation. Having you a sense of whiplash of how quickly it changed. “Not just for dinne’, but I’ll buy ya a new car! A shiny necklace! Anything!”

Staring at the man in front, you mouth opening and closing, trying to find the right words to say. Atsumu rambled on, on, of all the luxuries items and experience he could buy for you. All you had to do was pick one and say yes. Placing the utensils down, you reached a hand over to hover of his on the table. A calming gestured that worked, making him stop the fast words escaping his mouth. “Miya-”

“San.” A small broken whispered mumbled through, something you opted to ignored.

“Is this because of Kageyama?” Your soft voice hold guilty as you stared at your setter. Atsumu retrieved his hands from your hold, hiding his face in them as he groaned.  “I’m sorry that it hurt your feelings, but even if you go on your hands and knees right now-wait, Miya that’s not-”

Atsumu quickly jumped out of his chair, his knees slamming to the ground as he knelt beside you. Grabbing on to your hands, Atsumu ignored the rooms gasping in awe and your stuttering voice telling him to stop. Pleading in his voice with desperation, Atsumu begged, “Please (L/n), please. This is all I ask of ya. I will never anno’ ya if ya say just yes. Just say-.”

“No.”

“One night, I’ll make sure no one bothers ya,” Atsumu quickly said. “No one on the team, not Bo, Sho, or Omi will bother ya. Just be silence.”

You stared at him, in silence, seeing his cocky smile appeared on his face once more as he hit the right nerve. You had to hand it to him, he is a sly fox that knows what to say to get what he wanted. “Fine,” You muttered, taking your hands back from his hold, face heating with embarrassment as everyone in the restaurant looking at you. “But after dinner.”

Rising from the floor with a triumphant smirk, he swaggered back to his seat and happily started to enjoy his food. You signed at his antics, annoyed yet amused at his behavior. You boyfriends arrived back to the table few seconds after Atsumu sat back down, “Why is everyone staring at me?”

In a boosting tone, Atsumu chest puffed, “That’s cause of me, people love to admire perfection.”

“I’m telling Osamu-San you said that.”

“Two days silence?”

“Do you really have to do this?”

Kanto watched as Atsumu posted his phone at you. Learning about the deal the two of you made, your boyfriend stared at the two of you in boredom. “Can’t you do this at work? This is ridiculous.”

“It’ll be quick,” You promised him, frowning at his scoff. 

Looking back at Atsumu’s phone, Atsumu was trying to find the right angle, muttering to himself, “Got to make sure Omi doesn’t say it’s fake.” To which you giggled at your setter. 

With everything up to Atsumu’s standards, he gave you a thumbs up and pointed to you to indicated he started to records. With a small chuckle and a amusement smile, you started, “Miya is the great-”

“You’re not sayin’ it right,” Atsumu stopped, “it’s Miya-San is the greatest setter of all time.”

“That’s what I said,” You gave him a dry look.

Shaking his head with tight lips, Atsumu carefully said, “Repeat after me. Tsumu.”

“Miya.”

“I tried,” He quickly mumbled before stating loudly, “San.” With a polite grin, you waiting for Atsumu to continue, not saying anything. Atsumu blinked back at you, his phone, visibly showing he was recording, waiting for you to say it. “San.”

He was once again met with silence, a tight grin now faltered on your face as you blinked in response. Atsumu gestured with his face, indicating for you to repeat his words, but you only shook your head, replied back, “Miya.”

“Why aren’t ya saying it?”

“I’m repeated it back.”

“Say, Miya-San.”

“Miya.”

“Miya-San."

“Miya,” You repeated back, an amused tug on the corner of your lips tugged, seeing the frustration on Atsumu’s face slowly appearing. 

“San.”

“Miya.”

“Why wont you say the san,” He cried, looking defeated and desperate. “Please just for me, I’ll add another silence day, just please say san.”

Taking a deep breath in, you looked at the Jackal, feeling bad at the pitiful expression on his face. Looking at your boyfriend, who was waiting for you to finish up to go home, blinked before looking back at Atsumu, “It’s getting late… We have to be at the gym early tomorrow.”

“Wait,” Atsumu blocked your path. His hands tightly together, pleading with everyone once of his being. “Please, just call me Miya-San. I’ll do anything.”

“Goodnight Miya,” You patted his arm as you walked around him to your boyfriend, walking back home.

Leaving Atsumu on the sidewalk, he stared at the spot you once were, blinking slowly as he came to the realization. Seconds passed, people walking by as the ignored a still, broken shell of a man until his senses came back. Yelling out profanities at the sky, people all turned to and looked at him as he was crazy and wondering what did Omi do that was so diabolically wicked that cause the strange man to yell out in anger. 

Bonus:

With practice being held for half the day while the other half was a management meeting with trainers and coaches, your stomach rumbled with starvation. Making a quick stop before heading home, your steps perked as you walked closer to the door as the wonderful scent of food drafted towards you as the chime of the door opened. "Welcome-Manager! Nice to see ya!" Osamu's voice ranged from the counter over the hush talks around the restaurant.

"Hey," You greeted back, walking up the bar counter where he was making Onigiris, and right there, sitting at the bar stool was, "Sakusa-San! Two meetings in one day."

"You have the same idea as me it seems," Sakusa's greeted you, his small smile hidden behind his mask.

Sitting at the stool next to him, the three of you conversed. Talking about the meeting and upcoming practices for the games that will approached in couple of months. Telling stories and such as you waited for you food, until a deal was beginning to be born. "Say Manager-Chan," Osamu mused, pausing his creation, "I want to make a deal."

"Whatever it is," Sakusa sighed, "Say no-"

"It's about messin' with Tsumu."

"Say yes," Sakusa nodded his head. "Whatever it is."

You giggled at him, looking at the brown twin in front of you as you waited for him to continue. "Whatever ya do," Osamu smirked, trying to sniffle his giggled as he thought about it. "Don't add San to Atsumu's name. I need a way to pay him back."

"...Isn't that," You hesitated, looking between the two. "Disrespectful?"

"Depends on who ya ask."

Biting your lip as you thought on the request. Yes, you didn't grow up in Japan and as a foreigner you barely knew the social customs of how important of using the ending of in one's name. Nonetheless, you do know it would be disrespectful and rude to not add it to Atsumu's name, especially with his position on yours. Shaking your head as you rejected the request you opened your mouth to voice your reason but Osamu was quick to say, "Free onigiri for life."

"You have yourself a deal."

How quick you were to through morals away for free food.

Notes: Soooooo what ya'll think 🫣 Sorry about the late update! I'm thinking of doing a romantic route buttttt I'm not a 100% sure but the thoughts are there 😈

Taglist: @usermins @walllflowerrrsss @nagi-core @isentsworld

[cuppa-ale]

I don't really know what to say or do that isn't already being said and done. I can only say that I deeply wish that I wasn't such a coward for so long, and that I stood up for myself instead of seeking the approval of people who turned out to be bullies and abusers like I feared, and should have listened to that fear instead of feeling guilty and blaming myself for feeling that way.

There's so much I could say but I don't want it to be in bad taste.

All I can say is that if you think “proship/anti” discourse is stupid, that’s because IT IS. It’s fucking stupid and shouldn’t exist. But the reason so many of us DO take it seriously is because fantis/anti-shippers take it very seriously.

Antis take it so seriously, in fact, that they see it fit to stalk, doxx, harass and ruin a person’s life over what ships or art they like/create.

They take it so seriously that they would rather someone be harmed or killed rather than dare to enjoy dark, taboo or uncomfortable fiction.

The absurdity of all this is what makes it so terrifying.

There will never be an excuse for spreading someone's personal art around to slander them in a dangerous climate, and there is nothing wrong with liking kinky and taboo and weird art if it's not targeting anyone. Likewise, there is nothing wrong with liking any and all ships. (yes, even whichever ones you're thinking of right now.)

Especially, especially when that was done with the intent of getting someone denied from work and falsely accused of being "dangerous" over their personal cartoon drawings. Especially when it was done by jealous ex-friends who already had a bone to pick. Especially when the person they targeted was disabled with chronic health issues, and had their healthcare tied to their employment.

Like. idk what to say bc it's not about me, and all of this is bigger than me. I could go on and on about "what could I have said back in the day that would've stopped some of this?" but idek. I didn't even know about all this until after the fact, but holy fuck.

All I want to say to the people who hurt those they call “friends” over fiction is this:

You are the mean nerds that you claimed to hate, while pretending to be “cool and chill jocks.”

You are the bullies that you couldn't be in middle school when you got picked on for having "weird" interests.

You are bullies and bootlickers wearing a rainbow hat, and I’m not afraid of you anymore.

Actually, calling you "bullies" is too generous- at least some bullies grow up and move on. But y'all never do. You never did. You fell for r/adfem rhetoric and anti-kink rhetoric and gladly marched someone to their grave because of your own disgust and discomfort- to protect your own image from the jackals who you pandered to- to assuage your own egos and petty grievances- to project your traumas onto someone who had nothing to do with it- and whatever the fuck else y'all think was justification enough.

All I am now is angry, and sad, and I don’t know what I can do or what I could’ve done that would make anything better.

If i seem reclusive or stand-offish, a lot of it was in part due to the fear and anxiety I took away from seeing this behavior play out for years and convincing myself that it was "normal" and that I should doubt my own judgement, and now I find it hard to trust or form connections w/ most people because I'm afraid of going through the same things. I just feel so fucking stupid.

[deepest-dope]

Categorizing raiders by whether I think they're better at unarmed or melee and by how much plus a lil blurb o whatever crosses my mind thinking about it

Chance has his knife named after him in game so I think it goes without saying he's great with it. Not to say he couldn't beat you to death barehanded I just don't think he prefers it

Jessup actually carries a switchblade so i dont think he actually likes stabbing people out right, if anything I think it's actually more for utility. Probably prefers to fistfight over using it to stab people

McMurphy doesn't even carry a melee weapon so I think that speaks for itself. Decent enough in a fistfight but probably prefers to stay back and shoot at people

Micro has a weird sense of "politeness" I guess? It's definitely not honor as he is infinitely more concerned with surviving any fight you stick him in over fighting fair, but he won't pull his gun if the opponent doesn't pull one first. Teaches how to fistfight as with most basics but heavily prefers his super sledge over anything else.

Cave is the best hand to hand and occasional hand to weapon fighter out of them all, mostly because he doesn't get much practice with melee though. He got skipped over a lot when the Jackals were dealing out weapons to their own members, not that he ever complained. He's the Mojave's most dangerous man by the end of new vegas anywho

[themultifandomgal]

His Queen Pt15- Secret Of The Tomb

Years Later

Larry set up a new planetarium program so we all getting ready for the grand reopening, but for the last few weeks I haven't been feeling well, which is very strange. Now tonight I feel even worse, weak and I have been coughing, like I am right now

"My love are you alright?" Ahk asks me

"Ahk something not right. Is the tablet safe?" I ask. Ahk walks over to the tablet, I walk behind him and we notice a green erosion. Ahk and I look at one another before he runs off to find Larry. Not long later Ahk returns

Have you ever seen it like this before?" Larry asks

"Never. This corrosion has never happened before. It's always been exactly the same"

"I wonder what's up with it"

"I have no idea. And to be honest... my father knew the secrets of the tablet better than I did. Unfortunately, he swore he'd never reveal them. He never did" I start coughing again just as Ahk looses his balance

"You both okay?"

"Yes I'm ok" I answer

"I'm fine"

"Just take it easy out there tonight, all right? you guys have got 15 minutes till showtime. We're gonna figure this out tomorrow" Larry walks out of our exhibit

"I'm nervous about tonight" I announce

"I know. So am I" Ahk pulls me in for a hug.

Ahk and I watch on the sidelines as Teddy starts

Since 1869, when I was a mere boy of 11... this museum has been a shining beacon to our great city. Tonight we'll expand our horizons even further... to the Sun, the Moon, and the stars. From our very beginning mankind has looked to the heavens and given names to what he saw. The constellations. I thought you might like to meet them" Sacagawea opened the door and all the stars come flying out. Dexter then comes out doing tricks but then it all starts to go wrong. I begin coughing as Ahk has to hold onto a pillar for support.

Everyone is now sat on the staircase looking disappointed in themselves, even the animals

"Guys what was going on out there? seriously what were you thinking? Attila what were you doing with that dolphin man? their the most peaceful creatures

and you're hacking into it like it was The Cove or something. Did you see the look on Regis Philbin's face?"

"Reeju?" Attila says sadly

"Yeah, Reeju. Teddy, what were you doing pointing a gun at me?" Larry now turns attention to Teddy

"Forgive me, Lawrence. I don't know what came over me"

"Do you even remember that?"

"Not at all. Laaa, shut that down!" Laa is the new caveman. He seams to have taken a liking to Larry "It's a defibrillator. Put it down. It's dangerous! Laaa, that's electricity. Those aren't headphones. Stop it!" Dexter then start to wee on Larry which makes him angry "Oh! Hey! Whoa! Dexter! What are you doing? Honestly, if you're gonna act like a baby, then I'll get you some diapers. You want diapers again?"

"Ease up on the reins there, hoss. Can't you see? He feels terrible! Hell, we all do!" Jed says to Larry

"I don't know what's going on with everybody here... but tonight was really weird. Really weird"

"We feel awful. Something took hold of us like an evil spell" Octavius now adds

"Yeah, like we just weren't ourselves" Jed finishes

"Could this be to do with Ahks tablet?" I ask

"Maybe. I'll see if I can dig anything up"

"Woah cowboy what's going on with the tablet"

"Nothing for you to worry about" Larry checks his watch "it's nearly sunrise. Everyone go to your exhibits. I'll figure this out ok?" we all nod our head and get up. Ahk and I make our way to the Egyptology Department and into our sarcophagus

"Larry will help us, he always does" Ahk says as we lay down. The Jackals coming over to put our lids on

"I know, I'm just worried that this will be 3rd time unluckily" I sigh as I'm consumed with darkness. I close my eyes and fall asleep.

Next

Previous

[selfawarejester]

So, someone requested a fic where Blue Team rescues a Child!Reader from a war zone, but unfortunately Tumblr ate the ask. If you’re the one who requested it, please enjoy!

EDIT: found a screenshot! @simp-for-fictional-men-only, hope you like this!

Blue Team x Child!Reader (Halo)

It’s been a long “day”, even by Spartan standards.

Blue Team had been trying to repel Covenant forces on an Outer Colonies planet for over a week… but it hadn’t been enough. Command had called an evacuation, and after destroying a base to help the efforts, Blue Team had been ordered to help with final evacuation calls in the nearest town.

On the Pelican ride to town, there was a brief moment where they thought it was a waste of resources to send Spartans for an evacuation op, especially because the other Spartan teams were still doing the best they could to strike back at the Covenant; not necessarily to stop them anymore, just to hold them back long enough for the civilians to escape and maybe a little revenge. The events of the week, coupled with the guilt of their brothers and sisters still risking their lives, weighed on them heavily.

But at the end of the day, they’re glad they did: they found a group in the Rec center, a dozen people in the boroughs, twenty in an apartment complex — the Marines wouldn’t have been able to lift most of the wreckage that blocked them from escaping.

By the time they’d gotten to the outskirts of town, Blue Team had been left alone to sweep through the dead town. Chief considered just going to meet up with the Marines — surely, they could match the pace of the overloaded Troop Transports — and this area was just dilapidated factories and shady looking establishments that had long since been stampeded.

But a need to fulfil his task to completion stayed his hand… and thank god it did.

At first, it was just soft sniffles that sounded from the inside of the rundown factory. Chief and Kelly, who’d partnered up to search this side of the district, thought it was one of the many Jackals that had been posted in the previous sector wandering, or a Grunt that had been left behind after the Jackals had entertained themselves (in which case, they should probably put the thing out of its misery), so they go inside.

Chief goes first, moving carefully through the debris so as to not dislodge the wreckage, or disturb the corpses of the few soldiers and more civilians. He retrieves their dog tags, securing them in one of the compartments of the MJOLNIR, and Kelly follows, stepping where he does.

Slowly, the sound becomes louder and louder, wheezing and snotty sobbing. Definitely an injured Grunt, he thinks. It’s coming from under a slab of concrete propped up against a wall. Kelly flanks to the right, while Chief goes to the left. He signals that he’ll lift it on the count of three, and grips the edge of the slab. When the slab gets tossed aside, Kelly raises her shotgun, pointing directly at the small figure.

You shriek and bury your head in your knees, pulled up to your chest. You couldn’t believe that after all the gross, awful things you’d had to sit through, holed up in this corner, you were just going to die.

But when nothing happens for a solid five seconds, you chance a peek over your knees and gasp. S-117 and S-087 are emblazoned across the chests of the armored giants… Spartans.

Kelly and Chief exchange confused gazes, having no idea how to deal with children. The last ones they’d had any interaction with was the Castoffs on Netherop, but they were more feral gremlins than they had been children.

(Kelly and Fred still aren’t entirely sure that the whole incident wasn’t a heat-induced hallucination.)

John really doesn’t want to go through another episode like it, but on the other hand, it would be easier if you were pelting rocks at them.

Kelly, being the more personable of the two, kneels to your height (or as close as a Spartan could get) and softly calls. “You don’t have to be scared. We’re here to help.”

You knew that — they were Spartans! The greatest heroes Humanity ever possessed! You were just shocked that you were getting rescued by them.

“Y-you’re Spartans.” You whisper dumbly, but you couldn’t help it! How are you supposed to be cool when you grew up with Master Chief’s action figure on your nightstand. “Like Master Chief.”

You can’t see it, but John can sense Kelly’s smirk as she looks over at him and points. “Well, that’s the man himself.”

* Oh no. By the way your wet, moved eyes stare up at him, it seems you’re a fan.

OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD!!! You hope your pterodactyl screeching wasn’t external.

“Whoa.” This couldn’t be real. You’d passed out from exhaustion, and were dreaming all of this. That could be the only possibility!

John knows that this is the part where he says something witty or inspiring… but he really doesn’t know what to say, so he just awkwardly clears his throat. “Are you hurt?”

You shake your head violently, a burning need to not disappoint your childhood hero, and clamber up to your feet… only to wince and lean against the wall, something sticky on your leg.

Now that you’re standing, he can see the dried blood around your ankle. “Hold still!” All the softness is gone from Kelly’s tone as she works on bandaging you up, but you don’t mind, appreciating how careful she’s being.

Co-ordinating with Linda, who informs him that there are patrols scouting the areas — probably only to get any survivors, and not to catch them, but they should still move — and Fred, who tells him that the convoy is flying off-planet via Pelicans in half an hour, John makes some quick calculations.

With the pace you’d set, hobbling alongside Kelly, whimpering every time you put your weight on your left foot, it would take them at least an hour. Too long.

“Whoa…” The sound comes unbidden from Fred when Kelly emerges, with you clutching at her hip, all bloody and dirty. A pang of sympathy strikes as he looks around and realizes all that you must have seen. He was well aware that normal children weren’t nearly as resilient as he and his siblings had been.

“….” He stays silent as you arrive in front of him, staring up at him with slight apprehension, heart racing as he tries to think of something to say — and for some reason, he lands on an awkward, weirdly Southern-sounding. “Hey champ!”

John and Kelly both shoot him weird looks, and he wants to dig a hole and die, when they hear it.

A small giggle falls from your lips, tiny hands covering your mouth as you try not to laugh. Fred sighs in relief, but his anxiety returns when Kelly’s joking voice comes over the comms saying “Well, I guess we know who’s taking care of them.”

Linda drops out of nowhere, and nearly scares you to death as you shriek and bump into John, holding his leg tightly. You don’t really notice how he freezes, confused again.

“…sorry.” She doesn’t sound sorry, you think with a pout and drop from Chief’s leg, careful of your own busted ankle.

“That’s Linda, that’s Fred and I’m Kelly. You can just call him Chief. What’s your name?”

“Y-Y/N.”

“Alright. We won’t be able to make it if you’re walking, so you need to get on one of our backs.” Chief tells you, straight to business. “Which one of us do you feel comfortable with?”

He’s really hoping you pick Kelly or Fred. It wouldn’t exactly be a burden, you’re much tinier than the full grown people he’s had to carry out of a war zone, and you’re handling it much better as well, even though you’re barely ten years old.

“Um…” You look shyly up at Fred. “If you don’t really mind…”

*Aw. That’s… actually kind of sweet. Fred beckons you over, and hoists you up between his shoulders, giving you the rundown on what to do if people start shooting, and to hold on tight when he tells you to.

*You’re much more considerate than the freaked out VIPs he’s had to extract. But he still feels you twitch every time the wind causes something to clatter, so he decides to strike up conversation.

“So how did you wind up there?” It’s not until afterwards that he realizes that, unlike soldiers, civilians aren’t comfortable discussing stuff like that. But you answer that it was your dad’s factory, explaining that it was Bring Your Kid To Work Day.

The Spartans, specifically Kelly, asked you questions about it, having never heard of it themselves. After all, military settings rarely allowed such breaches of protocol.

You only trailed off as you got to the part where he told you to hide, and Fred lets it be.

When you finally get to the convoy, a nurse hurriedly tries to pull you away from the Spartans to help out, apologizing for not doing it sooner when Fred tells her it’s fine and that you can stay. After all, Kelly had fixed you up well, and you seemed terrified at the prospect of being left alone.

All that was left to do was fly up to the ship in outer orbit, with the rest of the survivors. Since there were such few Pelicans, everyone had been crammed into them, military and civilians alike. You’d simply wandered onto the one they’d been on, sandwiched between Chief and Fred.

Chief watches you picking at your shorts, and suddenly remembers the chocolate bar Sgt. Johnson keeps giving him - “you’re not yourself when you’re hungry, Chief” He’d snicker and then leave, Chief just standing there, not understanding the reference - but hey, chocolate was chocolate.

“Here. You did well.” Your eyes go wide, and for a second he thinks you’re going to refuse, but then you snatch it out of his hand and snarf it down. This is how it must feel to watch him eat.

“You’re going to like it up there.” Fred chimes in when your gaze starts getting distant again. “Space is really cool.”

In a twist of fate, you find one of your best friends when you arrive on the ship. Their parents promise to take care of you, and thank the Spartans.

When they start directing the survivors to their quarters, you hug every Spartan, even Linda… or their legs, since you couldn’t reach anything else. (Thankfully, you telegraph it pretty well, so they don’t accidentally smack you or something.)

John just stiffens and then nods, Fred pats you on the head awkwardly and shuffles away (he was very shocked by the affection), Kelly laughs and claps you on the shoulder, and Linda just hums and pets you on the head like a dog, walking away afterwards.

You go on to be a Marine yourself, finding yourself on the Halo campaign, where Chief and Cortana save you once more. You’re surprised he still remembers you.

You leave a bar of the same brand he gave you at his shrine, giving a heartfelt eulogy and catching up momentarily with the other members of Blue Team before you all leave again.

You almost faint when he shows up at Requiem, though. Don’t feel bad, as Lasky fanboys behind Chief for the whole campaign.

Palmer corrals you and Lasky into a break room to make fun of your behavior after it’s all over.

[haikwritings]

Haikyuu setters saying ‘I love you’ for the first time

Characters Mention: Kageyama, Kenma, Oikawa, Atsumu, Akaashi, Semi.

Warning: One scene of smut, angst (maybe?)

Tobio Kageyama

Y/n had come home from work to find her boyfriend lying on the couch watching his match against MSBY Black Jackals for the fourth time this month.

“Babe.” Y/n called sweetly as soon as she saw him.

Kageyama looked at her and smiled while holding a small carton of milk.

“Hey.” Kageyama answered sweetly.

Y/n walked over to the couch and lay down on his lap, she was exhausted from work— she wanted to find comfort on her sweet boyfriend.

“Hard day?” Kageyama asked worried.

“Y-yeah.” Y/n said very tiredly while closing her eyes.

He began to rub and massage her head, trying to give her as much comfort as possible.

He knew she had a hard day.

And he wanted to be there for her.

“Babe?” Kageyama called softly.

Y/n had heard him, but was too tired to answer.

‘S-She’s asleep.’ Kageyama thought as he smiled.

Seeing this as the best opportunity to tell her that he loved her.

“I- I love you.” Kageyama stutter whispering.

He just couldn’t believe that he was her boyfriend, she was so beautiful and smart...

And he was just him, that’s what he always thought.

“I- I love you so much.” Kageyama stutter as he stroke her hair.

His heart stopped when he felt her move on his lap.

“I- I love you too, babe.” Y/n whispered sweetly while looking at him.

Making him smile and blush.

Kenma Kozume

Kenma had been very distracted with his thoughts for a week. It all started with something his best friend Kuroo had told him.

“Pudding head.” Kuroo said while drinking a can of soda.

Kenma looked at him while playing his video game.

“What?” Kenma asked annoyed.

“Since when are you with Y/n?” Kuroo asked curiously.

“One year and forty-five days.” Kenma answered.

‘Oh, Damn, he counts the days.’ Kuroo thought.

“Why?” Kenma asked confused.

“H-Have you told her that you love her?” Kuroo asked curiously.

Kenma looked at him and shake his head.

“I guess she knows that I love her.” Kenma answered.

“But how? You haven’t told her.” Kuroo asked curiously.

Without noticing and realizing the panic he was lying to his best friend.

“I- I— I don’t know.” Kenma answered.

“Oh, forget I said anything. It was a dumb thi—” Kuroo was saying but was interrupted by Kenma.

“What if she thinks I don’t love her?” Kenma said while dropping his video game.

‘Oh fuck, I broke him.’ Kuroo thought.

So that's how he was now, in panic. He didn't know how to tell the girl he loved that he loved her.

He just thought that she should know— magically?

“Babe, are you okay?” Y/n asked worried as she saw him looking at her.

“Y-Yeah.” Kenma answered nervously.

She had noticed how he was acting different all week, he didn't even have his video game on him.

“Are you sure? You have been acting differen—” Y/n was saying but was interrupted by Kenma.

“I love you.” Kenma said out of the bloom.

Y/n looked at him surprised. She had been waiting to hear those words for a while.

She thought she wouldn’t never hear it from him.

She thought that maybe he wasn’t expressive?

“I- I love you too.” Y/n said sweetly.

Kenma looked at her and smile, walking towards her and hugging her.

Tōru Oikawa

“What’s your problem?” Oikawa asked confused.

“Nothing.” Y/n answered coldly.

He knew something was wrong with her, he wasn’t stupid.

“Stop.” Oikawa said.

Y/n stopped walking and looked at him.

“You either tell me or I will find out eventually.” Oikawa warned.

But that was the thing, she didn't want him to find out how jealous she was of his fans.

“I-Is nothing.” Y/n answered.

But of course, he didn’t believed her.

Again, he isn’t stupid.

“J-Just tell me.” Oikawa said desperately.

She knew she needed to be honest with him.

Even thought it was embarrassing.

“I- I’m sorry.” Y/n said softly.

Oikawa looked at her and frowned in confusion.

“I- I’m just... jealous.” Y/n muttered.

“What?” Oikawa asked confused.

“Y-Your fan was all over you.” Y/n pointed out.

‘Oh.’ Oikawa thought.

Now he understands, she was jealous of the fan girl who was flirting with him moments ago.

“I- I’m sorry I took things out of proportion.” Y/n said softly.

She was afraid that her boyfriend would leave her for one of his fans. She felt insecure and hated to think that she wasn't enough for him.

“I’m sorry.” Y/n apologize sadly.

He knew how his fans crossed the lines sometimes—

And he understood her.

He knew it wasn’t easy seeing all those girls all over him.

“I love you, Y/n.” Oikawa confessed out of the bloom.

Making her flinch at the sudden comment.

“Y-You do?” Y/n asked.

Oikawa smiled and nodded.

“You’re the only girl that I love.” Oikawa added, making her smile and blush.

“I- I love you too.” Y/n answered softly.

Atsumu Miya

“A-Atsumu.” Y/n moaned while riding him.

“T-That’s it baby, just like that.” Atsumu grunted pleasurably.

He knew she was on the verge of cumming by the way her hips were moving slowly and the way she was clenching around him.

“I-I’m so close baby.” Y/n managed to say.

She was making him feel so good, he couldn't help himself either.

“I- I’m close, just hold on.” Atsumu grunted pleasurably.

His trusts were starting to become harsher and faster.

“T-Tsumu.” Y/n managed to squeal pleasurably.

If he kept going like that, she was going to cum in seconds.

“I- I’m g-going to cum!” Y/n squeal pleasurably while holding tightly onto his back.

“Cum for me, be a good girl.” Atsumu whispered softly in her ear.

The pleasure and excitement was too much for her, which left her without strength. She hadn't realized that she had let go of her boyfriend's back. But lucky for her, he caught her on time—holding her tightly.

“I-Is okay, I got you.” Atsumu whispered.

Thrusting a few more times until he was cumming hard.

“Ah fuck!” Atsumu whispered pleasurably.

They were both out of breath but it was obvious that they were both more than satisfied.

“I- I love you.” Atsumu confessed as he came from his high.

He wanted to say it for a long time, but he never knew how to.

“I- I love you so much.” Atsumu said as he kissed her.

Both of them looked at each other and chuckled.

“I- I love you too, ‘Tsumu.” Y/n confessed almost out of breath.

Atsumu looked at her and smiled.

“L-Let’s go take a bath.” Atsumu said while taking her, carrying her to the bathroom with him.

Keiji Akaashi

“Why are you so fucking mad?” Akaashi yelled not understanding his girlfriend mood swing.

Y/n looked at him in disbelief.

“Unbelievable.” Y/n said disappointedly.

Akaashi looked her up and down, noticing how well dressed she was. Did he—did he forget his date with her?

‘Shit’ Akaashi thought.

“You can’t even remember? Am I not important to you anymore?” Y/n asked angrily.

This was the third time he had forgotten about their date.

Her anger was understandable.

“Shit, baby I forgot.” Akaashi said.

Y/n looked at him and rolled her eyes.

“Y-You can’t even spend time with me.” Y/n said sadly.

She was sad. She was looking foward to have a calmly and relaxing date with her boyfriend.

“B-Baby, I’m sorry.” Akaashi said.

He has been busy the past three months due to his new job as an editor. He spent so much time working that he was forgetting about his girlfriend.

“I’m leaving.” Y/n said as she walked towards the door, but was immediately stopped by her boyfriend.

“B-Baby, fuck. I’m sorry.” Akaashi pleaded.

“I- I can’t do this, Keiji. I feel that I’m the only one making an effort in this relationship.” Y/n said as she hid her face on his shoulders.

He knew she was hurting.

But he knew it was time to say it.

“I- I love you.” Akaashi confessed as he hugged her, feeling her tears on his shoulder.

Y/n had been waiting for those sincere words from him.

She thought he didn’t love her.

“I- I love you.” Y/n said sobbing while holding him tightly.

Akaashi looked at her and wiped her tears with his thumb.

“L-Let’s go to eat.” Akaashi said as he smiled at her.

They both knew they had a lot to talk about.

Eita Semi

Things have been weird between Semi and his girlfriend. She had told him a few nights ago how she loved him, but he never really answered back to her confession— leaving both of them uncomfortable.

“I- I made Tekka Maki, your favorite.” Y/n said as she saw him entering to the kitchen.

She was embarrassed by her confession and wanted to make up for how uncomfortable she thought she had made him feel.

“I- I’m sorry for what I said...” Y/n apologized.

The two of them had been together for two years now and they had never said they loved each other —until she had taken the initiative, which it turned out to be awful.

“Y-You don’t have to say that you love me...” Y/n said sadly.

She didn't want to admit it but she felt a little sad about what had happened.

She thought he loved her.

“I- I will wait for you.” Y/n said, faking her smile.

And she was right, he did love her.

What she didn't know is that he didn't know how to tell her. He was so surprised when she had confessed to him the immense love she had for him, that it left him speechless.

“I- I will in bed.” Y/n said while trying to hide her flushed face.

He felt guilty; she didn’t have to apologize for sharing the feelings she felt for him, her boyfriend. He felt stupid, worse yet... like an idiot.

‘How could I be so stupid?’ Semi thought.

He couldn't even eat the food that she had prepared for him.

Too guilty to eat.

So he decided it was time to confess the love he felt.

‘I need to tell her.’ Semi thought.

He walk towards the room they both shared, seeing her lying on the bed in the dark. He knew that everything that had happened had affected her.

“Babe.” Semi called softly.

He knew she was awake, but she was too sad to answer.

So he decided to lie down next to her, trying to make her feel better.

“Babe?” Semi said as he heard her sniffed.

He began to draw circles on her back, he knew that calmed her down.

“I- I love you.” Semi confessed.

He felt her heart stop from her back.

“I- I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.” Semi said embarrassed.

Causing her to move to his side, looking at him face to face.

“I love you.” Semi whispered to her ear, feeling her skin bristle.

“I love you.” Y/n whispered while hiding her face on his shoulder.

He smiled at those words, while stroking softly her hair.

But still, he felt like an idiot.

[samuclit]

Love Foolish

miya atsumu x reader

tags: angst, hurt/comfort, established relationship, mature, a little smut (define little on your own), 7.8K words

Summary: Miya Atsumu didn't realise that he was actually counting the days he spent with you while being your boyfriend. The step-process to how your relationship with him rekindles every time a new day begins was not as apparent as it seems to be, but he sure knew that the dreaded day when it comes to an end will never come.

This is an old piece that I worked on last year...I am terribly sorry for the way I post this fic I am not good with tumblr yall this is harder than my degree 

........................

Day 153

Atsumu was exhausted. He just got back from training with the college team for a few weeks already. He needs to catch up with the college team even though the time he spent away was used for his training with the MSBY Black Jackals team. He was advised by his family members, team coach and his friends that he should not miss out on any practice without a valid reason and should diligently claim his spot on both teams with the most outstanding effort and attitude so he followed, believed that this is for the best in order to build his volleyball career he was always so passionate about since he was in middle school. If only Osamu joins him, he thinks it won’t be as draining as it is right now.

Everyone in college knows Miya Atsumu, he is too perfect. The handsome look, tall and built figure, his diligence in both studies and shaping his career, to top it all off he is charming and is a ladies’ man. He could make every girl fall for him the instant he flashes his smirk that has been scientifically proven to be a bait for everyone in this universe. One small talk he could get girls on his bed, spending the whole night snogging off each other and leaving them whenever he got annoyed with the sudden disturbance. You happen to be one of the girls who got in his bed, goes on several dates with him, but this time you were one of the people who last longer than a week, and then a month and few more months after that. He assumes and waits for you to be the one ending the relationship but it won’t even come, and he is already tired of waiting.

So, he makes you tired. He doesn't want anything to be on his way at all, and you in the equation is making him disturbed at some times. During the first few weeks of dating, you often invite him for a date at the coffee shop which he obliges only for the reason to not break your feelings even though he has some tasks which are more important at hand. You are nice, but he isn’t. He told Suna that you deserve better. 

It has also been roughly two weeks since he last talked to you, and deep in his heart he kind of wants your nagging presence around him, just to distract him from the truckload of stress he’s carrying on his shoulders. So he texted you.

You: [Name], are ya coming or not. Been thinking of binging that Netflix series you’ve been babbling about.

[Name]: Ah sorry, it’s girls’ night with Midori and her gf. 

You: I see. Have fun. 

Seen.

That’s weird. You said it yourself that you wanted to binge on the weekends with him, after he finished with this practice for the week, and also he thinks that’s just you trying to make up with him after your first argument with him. It is...nobody’s fault, he thinks. He doesn’t want to blame himself and you, partially because you were really upset that day that you raised your voice and he didn’t chase you after you ran out of the apartment. It is just a silly argument. He doesn't want to think about it that much. 

As he took a shower and dressed himself in a fresh new pair of t-shirt and black sweatpants, he plopped himself on the sofa and went through Netflix to find something worth watching. He saw the show you wanted to watch ; Pretty Little Liars. Ah it’s not even a Netflix series, it’s just a series which is available on Netflix. Seems like he wasn’t even attentive to what you said. 

Before he falls asleep, he walks down the memory lane, to remember how exactly you and Atsumu could last this long in a relationship.

Day 0

The party seems to be a hit! His seniors on the volleyball team joined hands with the football team to conduct a party to celebrate post-sports festival of Tokyo U that happened for a week long and the party is held at the dorms outside of the campus so the board of education won’t meddle, with the promise that there aren’t drugs involved. Which is okay, the athletes are supposed to stay away from drugs and they’re disciplined enough to consider their life decisions. 

He was simply just hanging around in the living room of the dorm, which is a terrace house in a neighbourhood a few kilometres away, talking to his friends, Suna and Komori, who are his teammates in the college team. Komori used to go to the same Youth Camp with Atsumu so they knew each other since then. “Huh, sick party. I didn’t think there would be too many people here.” Komori said as he chugs down his cold beer, swaying a little after he finishes with a slightly long chug. “Senpai said just the athletes of the college are invited, but it seems like the whole campus crashed together. Lunatics.” Atsumu said as he plopped down on the bean bag and leaned his head back. Suna calls out.

“Oi, Midori is here. I invited her.” Atsumu is familiar with Midori, he has never been close with her but he knows of her since they went to the same high school together. The three pairs of eyes went towards the door together to greet Midori, with you tailing behind her. “Hey, glad ya made it!” Suna lunges forward and grabs Midori in a hug. “Yeah, cool place, I’m sorry I don’t have a plus one to bring with so I just drag my friend along. Hey, this is [Name]. Go say hi and be friends!” Midori pushed the other girl, which he heard to be [Name], also a familiar name. “Oh wait...you guys must have not have known about her...we went to the same school man...” Midori pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs. It is sad that not many people know about small girls like [Name] that much. 

Indeed, you went to the same school and you’re in a completely different league than Atsumu, he was and still is the famous athlete that has the entire girls’ population wrapped around his fingers. You’re around the circle of...top scorers who are active in volunteers and some other stuff Atsumu was not into. “Oh, is she another one of your hockey teammates?” you continue hiding behind Midori’s taller frame. Midori pulled you away and hugged your waist, giving support. “Come on now, babe say hi, they’re our friends” you glared at her with a smug look. “Hye, it’s [Name]. I’m not an athlete, I’m a political science major, pleasure to meet ya” your eyes tried to glance from Suna to Komori and to Atsumu but you averted your eyes away from him as soon as it landed on him. You look cute in just a rock concert t-shirt with black jeans shorts and plain converse. Classic party look, but you are not the type to go to parties because...assignments and stress are getting through you  which explains why you’re all fidgety. Midori knows there’s more to that, cause you’re a very wild extrovert at some time.

“Hey, enjoy the party, drinks and snacks are down there, the toilet is on another end, help yerself.” Atsumu pats on your shoulder and moves past you to greet his other friends who crashed the party. You’re petrified, to say the least and moved quick on your heels to head to the bathroom for some reality check. The environment is overwhelming. 

Atsumu gets tired easily even after downing a can of beer but he isn’t exactly drunk. He is just tired with the lots of conversations and the girls from other courses trying to talk to him, wanting the conversation in a bedroom which he said no to, he is a responsible man. He is not going to do it with them when in their drunken stupor. However, his endless denials are stopped with a sudden disturbance right in front of him.

Midori is on a couch, with a girl and was playing with her hair and occasionally rubbing her thigh and before they closed in someone threw a beer cup at Midori. “What the hell? Leave me alone!” Midori turned his body to see a bulked up guy whose name Atsumu doesn’t remember behind the couch, looming over the two figures sitting on the couch. It’s going to get ugly. 

“What the fuck, you leave us alone! Why the hell are homos here. Get out!”  Midori and the poor girl trembles in fear and Atsumu wants to blow a kick so bad but he can’t move because of the girls that are around him. Before he tried to push the girls away, he saw you moving towards him, taking away the beer can he has in his hands. “I’m sorry I’m taking this!” Your eyes had a small fire ignited in it and he can’t help but gave away his beer can, and then he saw you walking up on the couch and on to the head rest, spit into the beer and pours the beer all over the homophobic guy who slandered your friend. The guy was drenched and screamed because the beer was icy cold and it came to contact with his skin that got heated from way too much alcohol consumed. 

“Oh, I am very sorry, I was convinced that this big hunk of muscle is a trash can!” you screamed with an evil laughter and the whole party laughed and cackled at the sight of the giant asshole from Engineering talking shit about the woman adored by the majority of campus. Midori is your best friend, a very kind, beautiful  and valid lesbian friend of yours. You would do anything to protect her from the touch of homophobic devils that would insult her every now and then. It has been happening more recently after she got out of the closet, even when she was inside all this time, you have always given her tons of support and protection because it’s just something about you. Midori was already smiling and got herself up away from the sofa with the girl she was with, hands holding hers tightly. 

“You punk! Are ya crazy? Do ya want me to kill ya like I kill your friend here?” your figure who had one leg propped on the head rest while the other on the couch went tense and is about to fall and the nasty asshole grabbed you by the neck, having you lifted in the air and no one helped to stand against him except Midori who was pulling your body before the guy fully grasped your entire neck in his hands. Before he even pressed harder on your throat, Atsumu landed a punch on his face, making himself knocked down on the floor. You already fell flat on the couch, trying to regain your breath. He warns the guy off and he immediately leaves after. 

“Shit shit, are you okay?” Atsumu kneels on the floor to check up on you, who were lying on the couch, still coughing out and trying to calm down. Midori ran to get some water for you. “I’m fine, fine, where's Midori? Is she okay?” Midori hit you in the arm. “Idiot. I am fine but look at you, I told you I’m alright, if you give them attention and piss them off they will harm you, look what happened.” Midori cries and hugs you. Atsumu checked up on your face, saw tiny drops on the edge of your eye which got wiped away the instant Midori wrapped her arms around you. “I told you  I will always protect you okay, I promised you that” Midori looked at your face again and was still sobbing. She turns towards Atsumu who stood by them. Suna and Komori arrived in the space after making sure the guys had run off. The party went back to normal and it’s chaos again. 

“Thank you, Atsumu, if it weren’t for you, I don’t know what would happen to the both of us.” The girl from before is rubbing her hands on Midori’s back trying to calm her down. “No, [Name] did the most fight, I only come in when it gets physical. I let ya know when I see that guy again I am going to beat the living shit out of him. Nasty jackass.” Atsumu’s rage calms down when he sees you and Midori laugh, finally he makes a safe space for you and her. After some minutes of calming down and talking and giggling Midori takes the cue to leave. “I think I need to go now, need to take some air, you should, too, babe. Love you” Midori hugged and left with the girl she was with the entire time during the party.

Atsumu has long left you and Midori alone when you were busy talking to her, so he goes away somewhere to talk with some of the boys from the football club. They heard something about how that guy is a maniac and has been expressing his hate crimes for several years now, basically a loser and Atsumu thinks his sucker punch is something he could take pride in. After he saw Midori take off with the girl he saw you heading towards the door that linked to the backyard. More people were there, some were laying on the ground doing some unnecessarily lewd stuff that Atsumu does not want to remember.

He saw you taking a seat on one of the stools that was set up for guests to sit. He brought a can of beer, intended to give you. As he approaches you were rubbing around the area on your throat which the bully from before had pressed on. You were still in pain. “Hey, needa drink?” Atsumu hands over the beer while he sits down on the stool next to you. “Ah, I’m sorry I don’t...drink around guys. Trust issues.” Atsumu furrowed his eyebrows and he finally got what you were trying to say. “Oh, I totally get it, I’m sorry.” You were a flustered mess. You didn’t intend to actually...reject a kind offer from him but it’s a strange new place and strange new environment, though you knew Atsumu from high school to be quite a decent person that you– “[Name]? Are ya okay? Ya were about to say something earlier?” “Oh, yeah. You don’t have to apologise, we can just go for drinks some other times'' you let out a small laugh and he smiles. Awkward.

“Ya don’t have to worry about that guy, I heard someone is going to report him to the dean. He’ll be out in no time” you smirked. “Good! Midori must be happy”. The both of you laughed and the  conversation continued randomly, topics about his volleyball activities and you popping in some random thoughts about life to him, it makes him feel weird at first but he picks up after quite some time.

And the night goes with you spending your night with him on his small bed in the apartment he shared with his other friends. Kisses are littered all over your body and Atsumu leads you through your first intimate session with so much ease and gentleness. He left an especially passionate kiss on the neck that tells the stories of your fight and trauma, hoping that he could kiss it away and replace it with the memories of your first. “Are ya really sure about this?” Atsumu asked at one point when you were making out with him on his lap just right after he got you in his room. “Please, do what you want” and Atsumu continues to ravish you and pulls on every article that trapped your beautiful untouched body. 

The morning he woke up, you were sleeping soundly, despite the uncovered chest you had on display cause you fell asleep after the second round of fucking you had no chance to clean up or put on a shirt. The messy hair and arousing look you had on aside, you look too peaceful to be on someone’s bed, someone who you have known for a long time but have only gotten close from an impromptu encounter so Atsumu threw the plans of getting out of bed aside and continues watching the small details on your face. He would pick up the falling strands of your hair and tucks it behind your ear, trailing his fingers on the swollen lips you had after making out with him the entire night. He enjoys your presence. He likes it, being with you, so this is all worth it. 

As your eyes fluttered open, squinting because of the bright sun, which was now covered by Atsumu’s hands to help you get back to sleep without the disturbance. You woke up anyway. “Atsumu, what are ya doing?” you asked, trying to pull the blanket that barely covers your naked front. “Just letting a princess continue her peaceful sleep” you were blushing, it feels like a dream to wake up with Atsumu next to you, so you lean into him more and he tackles you under the sheets. As Atsumu closes in again, about to kiss you like he did the previous night before, your eyes widened and you pushed him away, rolling out of bed naked. You pulled the blanket to cover yourself and scrammed to find your underwear and outfit from last night. “Fuck, fuck I’m late shit I gotta go” you were clasping your bra and putting on your underwear as you continue with your series of cuss words picked up at random. “What’s going on are you okay? Was it–“ you put on your jean shorts and looked at him. “No-no I’m late to a group discussion and I am going to die I think.” You already had your phone in hand with your bag in hand running to the door. Atsumu put on his sweatshirt and training shorts in a haste, offering to give you a ride. 

“Hey, I can help ya get to yer spot with my car. Don’t have ta rush'' you gaped and mumbles thousands of gratefulness and lunges forward to hug but stopped yourself. In the car you were on a phone call with one of the people in your group and you immediately spilled the idea you had in mind in a heartbeat. Atsumu has been driving nowhere so he stops and parked his car at the parking space of the nearby McDonald’s. After several arguments and reasons to have your opinion accepted you finally heaved a relief and ended the call with another apology. 

“Yer quite a persistent one aren’tcha?” you looked at him, face messy, unclean and tired. The post-sex glow seems to not work with everyone. “Yeah, there’s an event and I’m in charge. I was so caught-off guard. Pretty sure they will kick me out if they don’t accept my idea but guess not!” you laughed and smiled gleefully. Pure satisfaction whenever people acknowledge us. Atsumu understood that much. “So...since you don’t have to go...breakfast?” Atsumu points his thumb to the back of the car, which was the entrance to the McDonald’s. “No...I stink so much...but I am hungry so....drive-thru?” Atsumu smiles and puts down the handbrake. “Sure thing, princess”.

After you both got your respective breakfast meal set, Atsumu takes off to the lake and brought you together with him to eat on the benches. Atsumu enjoys the company as much as you did. What starts off with a random conversation of how the duck is limping, to talking about the fluffiness of the poodle someone took for a walk turns into a conversation about each others’ personal lives.

“If anything, virginity is a social construct to put down women, so if you think last night is fun just because of that, I am going to berate your entire existence” you warn him, mouth full with the breakfast muffin. “Sure, what’s fun about last night is that you’re hot and I like you.” Atsumu closes in, trying to make you feel more flustered. “You...like me?” you were blushing and he guessed that his classic method works. “Can say that, I don’t usually have breakfast with people I sleep with, so I think that’s how I know.” You scoffed as his smug smile grew wider. “Oh you’re quite a cheesy one. So, this isn’t just a one time thing?” you looked over to him. He said no and continued kissing you like he meant it. 

Days after that, the dates are frequent, spending the night in his apartment is a routine, watching movies is a norm and the intimate sessions get more interesting for the past few months, he thinks he needs to tell you all about his fantasy and you told him yours and both wishes are fulfilled.

Day 150

Atsumu woke up from the nap, the movie was already finished by then. He reached for his phone which was ringing non-stop. He's going to puke his brains out. Midori was the one calling him. There are around 7 missed calls coming from Midori.

“Oi pisshead, your girlfriend’s drunk. Come and pick her up.” Atsumu looks at the time

10.50

“Didn’t last that long?” Atsumu giggles. Midori snapped. 

“I’m being serious. She gets crazier now you need to pack her up. I can’t because my girlfriend is as shit-faced drunk right now.” Midori starts to call out your name to get off the table. Whatever that happened it must have been really shitty what’s going on down there at the bar.

“Okay, just text me the address I’m on my way” Atsumu took his wallet and car keys with him, all fresh to fetch your drunk ass home. 

As soon as he arrived he stormed to the booth which you and Midori sat at. You were already lying down on the couch, fast asleep and giggling as you sleep. “Okay you’re here. I’m going home with my girlfriend so you take care of her properly.” Midori sat herself at the couch you were sleeping on. “[Name].....I’m going now so take care okay! Love you goodnight!” you were whining so loudly at her. “Nooooo....Midoriiiii-chan I am going to miss you don’t leave me” you were pouting and whining and hug Midori to prevent her from going. Atsumu stood at the side watching the mess unfold. “Your boyfriend is here to pick you up! Goodbye!” Midori dragged her girlfriend away and got out of the bar.

“Midori’s good at lying. There’s no way my boyfriend cares ‘bout me” Atsumu covers his face in shame because the other customers at the bar are looking at you. “Who are ya...are you a stranger? Can I call you Mr Stranger? You look handsome.” You giggled and Atsumu laughed at your cuteness. This is certainly a new side to you, he has never seen you turn into a giant ball of fluff before. “Okay now cmon Miss [Name] let’s get ya home.” Atsumu swooped your legs in his right hand while the other supported the small back of your body. Your eyes are still squinting which must be the reason why you can’t recognise Atsumu yet. 

“I miss my boyfriend Mr Stranger. I want to see him...please take me to see him pleassseeeee.” You buried your face in his chest and held on to the cotton string of his hoodie. “Oh yeah? Is he really that handsome?” he puts you in the passenger seat and buckles your seatbelt. “He is! His hair colour is a bit funny, Midori said it makes it look like he bathed in piss” Atsumu got that too many times already. “But in my very personal point of view, it is kind of biased, he rocks that look. He looks hot!” Atsumu blushed and proceeded to head to the driver’s seat. It’s you and your habit of expressing too many opinions again. He liked this one. He also misses your constants chit chat after a whole month of not talking to each other because of a petty argument. He admits that he misses you so much, but a jerk like him won’t admit it. He’s going to break up with you anyway.

As he continues driving he would listen to what you said about ‘your boyfriend’ and he would sometimes smirks and whispers an ‘I know’ and sometimes it is too loud you caught him in the act. The night drive seems fun with you, and he figures you are still too drunk and even with too much talking your body stays the same. You fell asleep at some point, when he is close to the apartment you resided in. He found out after quite some time that Midori moved into her girlfriend’s apartment so now you live alone. 

Even after he arrives at the apartment complex he lets you take some time to sleep, and as time passes by and it’s getting later into the night, he shakes your shoulder to wake you up. 

“Hey, [Name], we’re here.” Atsumu smiles as you yawn and stretches your limbs.

“Mr Stranger? I have a secret. Can I tell you...I’m afraid to tell anyone.” You said after some time. Atsumu had no idea what to do. So he just played along. “Yeah, I promise I will keep it.” Atsumu laughs and looks at you. 

“I think my boyfriend doesn’t love me. I kind of got the gist of it for a long time...but...now I am convinced. I think...the next time I see him, will be the last time I see him. And I–I don’t wanna” you cried immediately, you were sobbing too hard and you covered your face with the both of your palms. Atsumu is shattered especially, what you said was true. He might break it off when time comes, but seeing your heart broken and giving up the usual happy and chaotic smile and laughter you had because of the thought of breaking up with him, he felt like his heart was going to jump out of his chest. So he asked further. He needs to know more, he needs to know why. Why do you catch up to what he was thinking so fast? 

“W-why is it?” Atsumu choked on his breath. His heart was thumping so loudly, and it was beating off the charts. “He seems to not want me around...I tried my best to give him space, time for himself  but....he never wants a time wimme....and then...I-he-he don’t want to see me even when he is free”. You continue crying in the silent car, Atsumu wanted to reach your hands but he knew that would be such an asshole thing to do since he is the one causing this mess. Atsumu got out of the car and opened the door from your seat. “Hey hey let’s get you to your apartment okay?” Atsumu unbuckled the seat belt and you kept on crying, you pulled on his sweater and gripped it so tightly and wailed like a baby into his chest. He sighed and embraced you in a tight hug, calmly rubbing the small of your back trying to calm you down. 

After quite some time only the sniffles could be heard. You start talking again. “You know...I’d rather see him happy even if it means I need to break up with him. Ah I’m so dramatic for no reason. Can you help...carry me to my apartment, Mr Stranger?” you pulled away from his hug, makeup ruined and eyes red. Atsumu smiled and nodded at you. “Of course, I’ll carry you.” He carried you in a manner when he hugs your tiny body to carry you to the bed during one of those nights he needed a release. This closeness to your warm body, and the earlier event that happened of you confessing to a complete stranger about him, he is regretting it. 

Day 125

Atsumu just got home from South Korea. He was there for a training camp with the home team there because one of his coach from the MSBY Black Jackals used his connections with an old friend to conduct a camp for them to further polish the players’ skill in the said sport. It would be a great chance for him to bloom more than how he is after his successful debut as a Div. 1 League player. 

He was simply relaxing around after two days and Osamu was cooking plenty of food for the gang. Osamu invited some friends of his, and Suna brought his girlfriend with him. Komori was there too, with his cousin. When Osamu asked if he was going to invite you, Atsumu shrugged and said no, he wants to relax without you around. Even if you are around you would never go that far to make him uncomfortable. He still hasn’t called you yet even when he landed in Tokyo two days before. 

“Atsumu, didn’t ya miss yer girlfriend? Just tell her to come over.” Osamu said from the kitchen, bringing a pot of stew he made for the gang and putting it on the table. “Nah, she didn’t even know I’m in Tokyo.” Everyone in the living room looks at him. “Miya you’re kinda an asshole for that” Komori said as he passed a bowl to Suna and his girlfriend. “Cmon now don’t look at me like I’m a criminal or sumn...I just want to relax I’ll tell her later.” Atsumu scoffed and leaned his back to the sofa as he was sitting on the carpet.

“Are you...joking. She came by practice the other day, said she can’t reach you.” Sakusa said as he put down his mask aside and dug in. Atsumu knew that. He purposely ignored your text and calls and only left a message when you’re offline or when he knows you were sleeping. He doesn't want distractions. “Yer a prick, [Name]’s really nice and ya can’t see that. If ya got issues just break up already.” Suna speaks and his girlfriend agrees. “Yeah for real, if Rintarou had issues I know he is going to leave my ass in the streets. But I’m glad he has no problems. As a woman I will honestly kick you in the ass, ya know, that woman with woman solidarity.” Suna kissed his girlfriend on the cheek and Atsumu scoffed. “I know, I just don’t know the right time yet.” Komori already mumbles a series of cuss words,  Osamu and Suna sigh and Suna pulls his girlfriend back from kicking Atsumu in the face. Sakusa heard a doorbell and reached for the door now to open.

“[Name]?” Sakusa screams in shock. Speaking of the witch. Well, you’re not a witch, you’re the sweetest person ever that happens to be Atsumu’s unlucky girlfriend. “Hey Sakusa-san! Nice to see you! I brought something!” you waltzed in the door and headed to the kitchen you’re already familiar with. Atsumu felt his guilt eating his insides. Who the fuck called you here? 

Komori puts his phone up so Atsumu can see. Komori smirks at him and Atsumu flashes out the middle finger to him. Sakusa mumbles and points at Atsumu, he said somewhere along the lines of you solve this on your own, Miya! 

Osamu headed to greet you first. “Hey Osamu, I brought some home made dorayaki for you and Atsumu. You guys love it right?” Osamu smiles and thanked you endlessly. You smiled but as you looked at the awkward little Atsumu behind Osamu you stopped smiling. He headed towards you and Osamu knows it’s his cue to leave the both of you in the kitchen.

“Hey, how’s South Korea?” Atsumu sat on the chair of the kitchen island. “Twas good. The food there, they’re amazing.” You hummed. “Glad you enjoyed it. Maybe I would know more if you actually answer my calls and texts about how busy you are and tell me when you arrived. But it seems like you don’t miss me that much.” You sighed. 

“[Name], I’m just...I’m sorry I need time for myself I’m so tired.” You looked at him, sad and gloom covering your whole body like the dark blue cardigan you had around you. “Tired of me or of practice?” you asked and reached for the tips of his fingers. “That’s–that’s not it, okay. Please give me some time.” Atsumu pleaded, you flinched when he suddenly glared at you. 

After some time, you released a deep breath and headed to the door. “Enjoy the dorayaki guys, I hope I don’t interrupt you guys. I’m sorry and please take care of Atsumu for me.” You opened the door and headed out. Atsumu is still in his seat. When the door was slammed he got up and sat himself back on the carpet around his friends. He picks up his chopsticks and pulls the omelette Osamu made. Everyone was staring at him.

“Eat your food and stop staring at me.” Atsumu rolled his eyes and ate more food on the table. “Ya don’t even want to chase her?” Osamu asked from beside him. “Nope.” Komori scoffed. 

“Just want you to know she got here by bus alone. I don’t know if it helped change your mind.” Komori said and drank his cold lemon tea he poured for himself. Atsumu stopped chewing and clenched his jaw, looking at Komori.

“The one who ruined lunch is you, Atsumu.” Suna’s girlfriend said and Suna agreed. So does everyone else. 

You don’t leave a text to Atsumu to the day he picked you up from the bar. He only texted you because he wants to end the relationship.

Day 153

Atsumu still has you in his arms. You’re already asleep, face still drenched with tears. He struggled with the pin to your apartment but picks up after a while of thinking. It is his birthday. 

Atsumu realised he is a bigger asshole than how he was minutes ago in the car as he remembered that he had never come to your apartment. Months of relationship it was always his place as you always preferred his place over yours and he thinks that maybe if he was the one giving in more effort to be the one going all the way to your apartment to spend time with you, he would have felt  better about himself. Normal dates outside are very rare aside from lunch or a quick grab of coffee before classes because he was too busy with his practices and you with your duties as a political science student.

He carried you to what he assumed to be your bedroom, carefully putting your body on the bed, taking off the leather jacket you had with you, slowly dragging the thick comforter to cover your shivering body. After shuffling in the kitchen, looking to find some aspirin and a glass of water for you to gargle right after you woke up he put it on the desk at your bedside. 

He saw a picture of you and Midori on the table, during graduation day. Midori carried you on her back while you threw a peace sign with tongue out and Midori making a disgusted face. He laughs at it, putting it back to where it belongs, carefully. 

You had a lot of other pictures pasted on the wall, the one that faces you when you sit on your study table. The notes and thick books are messily arranged on the shelf, a succulent that says ‘Good Job!’ on the table standing cutely, possibly the one that kept you up during the late night study sessions. He never really checked up on you and your studies, how did you manage to be so strong on your own without a supportive boyfriend, he doesn't know. 

And then he saw the pictures you hung neatly. He took the pictures one by one and saw some notes you scribbled on the back of the photograph. 

First, a picture with your parents. You talked about them at some time because you’re their only daughter and you missed them as much as they missed you. One time when you were making out with Atsumu your parents called and you pushed him away to answer the phone call. So funny how you got so innocent and angel-like just right after doing some lewd stuff with Atsumu just with the voice of your parents on the phone. At the back of the picture, it wrote.

Secured the top-scorer title with a scholarship! Mommy and Daddy are proud of me and I will never stop!

The second picture is of you and Midori at a pride parade. This time you wore a white t-shirt with blue jeans and sneakers and you looked absolutely mesmerizing. 

Pride with Midori. I am so happy for her!!

Some other pictures of you at an animal shelter, old folks home, in the streets, caring for homeless people, women’s march and marathon for cancer awareness. You were basically everywhere and it is what makes him regret not finding out about this side of you. All he does is talk about his talent in volleyball and you always make him feel the best that he never gave a chance for you to talk about yourself. 

Atsumu can’t stop the stretch of his smile and it is making his jaw sore. He is so whipped for you. You have always been such a caring person to him, doing your best to take care of him when game losses make his sour mood make a nasty comeback. 

He would cry in a phone call because he messed up his set and you arrived in his room, dropping your bag to hug him and lull him back to sleep. He cries so hard and you would never make him cry worse than he did, you were always comforting but his pride and selfishness would forget that in a day because he thinks the relationship you had with him is a waste. 

Atsumu is a fool. He didn’t realise how much his confusion hurts you more than it hurts himself. He is such a fool for not being there to protect you. The thought of you crying minutes earlier makes him scream in his heart, he doesn't ever want to see it again. If he made that happen again he will never forgive himself and if he has to build a shrine and be a monk to make sure his sins are forgiven he would do it. He would do anything for you. 

The last picture hid him the hardest.

It was him, and you, during his debut game as MSBY Black Jackals setter. 

You had your body leaned into his arm, smiling wide with a bouquet of flowers for him in your hand. He was staring at the camera with a lazy smirk, hands encircling your waist. It was sweet, and you look very cute standing next to him, in his embrace like that. A sight so beautiful. It is a shame when he remembers what exactly happened that night.

It was a very joyful day for Atsumu and for you but Atsumu didn’t even tell you about the match, you were only informed of the game because of Komori so the ticket you got is because Osamu gave up his ticket for you. He is tired of seeing Atsumu play volleyball and he can see it on his phone if he wants so he just gave it to you, saying you deserve it better. Even when you’re not informed about the game, you still showed up in the cutest little dress with the cutest little smell and the cutest bouquet of baby breath flowers for him. 

Atsumu is not fond of flowers. He is not fond of surprises either. When you showed up on the court, congratulating him, he was shocked. He was busy talking to fangirls and kids who love volleyball until you call out his name with so much pride. 

“Atsumu aaaa I am so proud of you! You worked so hard for this and I am sorry I don’t know of this sooner.” You hugged him and pat his back when you hugged him. Eyes glistening as you pulled away. Said the cries are happy tears. You told one of the passers-by to take a picture of you and Atsumu, resulting in the small piece of photography in his hand.

Later that night he went with his team and celebrated the debut together with them while you took off to your apartment, barely making it to the last bus of the night to get there safely, wishing you were with Atsumu in his car instead.

He turned the picture over. There is a long note there.

Might be the first ever picture with Atsumu, like ever. Nonetheless I am so happy and so proud of him it made my jaw hurt so much as I write this. I can’t stop smiling!!! I hope I can attend more of his games, more to his success, more time with him. I feel like I am the happiest person alive! I feel like one of the fantasy film protagonists where the person they have loved for a long time is within their arms, finally! I am so happy to have known Atsumu since the beginning days of school, how his charming and cunning personality, inspiring and charismatic figure would walk down the hallways of Inarizaki, I will always fall for him over and over again. I love him so much, and even if it takes a thousand years to wait for him I will always wait. Praying that this essay reaches the Gods because I love him too much, I don’t even want to let him go. I love Miya Atsumu, and I hope he feels the same thing too.

Atsumu pasted the picture back on the wall, turning off the study lamp and closing the door as he walked out. He sat on the couch in the living room, only having the kitchen light to illuminate the entire apartment. As he sat there, tears rolled off his eyes and loud sobs spilled out of his mouth. 

He realised he is such a foolish man, living in a complete lie with an angel from heaven taking care of him despite getting paid dust in return. He cried so hard he took the pillow next to him and cried himself to sleep. 

Day 154

If it is not for the bubbling and disturbing feeling in your stomach, you wouldn’t have gotten up and run to the bathroom to puke your guts out, but here you are. Smelling so stinky you just take a shower along the way. Fresh out of the shower in clean new clothes you saw a tall glass of water with your birth control pills right beside it. After downing the glass of water you headed to the kitchen to grab an aspirin to calm down the throbbing pain of your chest.

What you found instead is the sight of Atsumu, wearing an apron on top of his white t-shirt. It has been way too long since you have last seen him, and you didn’t expect to encounter him in your apartment, let alone him in the kitchen, preparing a breakfast for two. “Atsumu! What are you doing here!” you screamed audibly to him and got to the table to see a tray of rice and a bowl of soup on the table. 

“Ah, ya woke up earlier than I thought ya would, was intending to make breakfast on bed like in that one cheesy film you love so much.” You blushed. You headed to the cupboard and popped the aspirin into your mouth with the assistance of the barley tea Atsumu prepared for you. 

As you sat down awkwardly, he pulled out the rice bowl and put the tray in the sink and scooped another bowl of rice and soup for himself. He prepared a hearty meal for two, a miso soup to help you sober down and ease the gut after rounds of alcohol shots dumped in your body. 

Right, you were drunk last night. “So why are you here?” you asked after spooning out the final drop of the miso soup. “You remember nothing at all?” Atsumu asked. “Wait...so...Midori didn’t lie?” you asked again. Just realising that Midori already told you that your boyfriend was there. 

“Oh my god...how much did I say?” you pressed your palms on your face and dropped them to your lap. Atsumu smiles. 

“You said a lot! You said too much that it made me learn a lot.” Atsumu reaches your hands the moment it gets on to the table. He clasped it with care and so much gentleness even when his hand is calloused and rough from the intense training for so many days in a week. 

Atsumu sighs and hangs his head low. “I just realised that all this time, our relationship is one-sided” you gasped and the grip on his hands gets tighter. “I...took you for granted. I never gave you a comfort space to live in, a shoulder to cry on, and I have never...expressed my feelings for you.” You were trembling and Atsumu fully connected your fingers with his, interlacing it together hoping that neither of you will let it go.

“All this time you were always there for me, no matter what I was struggling with, no matter the time and place you would rush and hug me and tell me that it will be okay but I let you cry on your own whenever you deal with the same problem. I made a big mistake, and I swear to my life that I will make it up to you.” You got up from your seat and went to the sink along with your empty bowls. Atsumu got there too, hugging you from behind. 

“I am so sorry for being late, I love you. I love you so much that it hurts when I see you get hurt because of me.” Atsumu hugged you like he would make you dissolve in his body, it was so tight and warm and comforting it felt like home.

Miya Atsumu is your home. You are his home. And so he kisses your hair, your neck, your shoulders to make sure you won’t disappear before him, to tell you that what he said is true. 

You turned around. Holding his head in your hands.

“Atsumu, I love you too, and I missed you so much.” You smiled as the tears dropped, and Atsumu thinks this sight of yours hurts him as much as it makes his heart feel warm. It was a mixed feeling, but he knows that the perfect moment is right there, he holds your waist and your neck and kisses you on the lips with so much need and passion, to tell you that he loves you.

Your hands went to wrap itself on his neck, occasionally stopping by to run your hair through the blonde locks you love so much. He kisses in deeper and languid motion; it makes your head drowsy, worse than what the alcohol did to you but the sensation is nice. The alcohol was bitter and you hated it, this kiss tastes sweet and flavourful and you love it.

Atsumu continues while he carries you towards the bedroom he left you in alone last night, slowly putting your body on the messy bed who still has the scent of you from last night. It is supposed to gross you out but Atsumu is making it harder for you to breathe so nothing really matters, and Atsumu loves the scent as much as you love his oozing warmth that makes your eyes roll to the back of your head.

He continues peppering kisses along your entire body, just like the night when you first spent together. Shirts off, pants off, underwear off. There’s nothing in the way of the both of you in the intense love-making session. Atsumu loves the way his name rolls on your tongue as he nibbles addictively on your neck, your chest and your tummy that is filled with the food he made for you, the love he had in store from his heart is delivered into you with so much ease. He plans to deliver some more as his kisses turn more passionate as the clock ticks, tongue intermingles and liquid drooling out of each other’s hot mouth.

Atsumu is already so eager to get inside you but he always has to prioritise you before him so he asked you. “Can I-can I get on with it now?” he asked, trying to recollect his breath at the same time while he looks for a particular wrapper in the drawer of your bedside table. “It’s fine, Atsumu, I’m on birth control.” You smiled at him and he smiled back, caressing your cheeks, touching your lips and tucking your hair behind your cute ears he loved to kiss so much. “You know, you mistook the birth control pills for aspirin that’s why I rummaged through the whole cupboard to look for one.” You gave him a glare so cute he continues kissing you. “My bad, baby. Can I get in now?” He asked with a teasing little smirk displayed on his stupidly handsome face.

“Yes, you can Atsumu.” You kissed him on the cheeks and hugged his neck as he entered. Inches by inches you sucked him in and he would kiss your temple to make you feel better after the stretch. The time away clearly made a lot of changes between the two of you, and it all makes this event more admirable than the ones before, because of the heartfelt confession you shared with him in the morning. All he wants to do is kiss your body like it is the only thing in this world worth worshipping. You are the most beautiful thing that ever happened in his life anyway, and he would never regret anything in his life anymore.

After the both of you peaked, he released into you, stayed there for a few minutes and took it out after he finally made your deep furrowed eyebrows disappear. You finally relax after the soothing time with your dearest one and he plopped himself next to you. 

Atsumu opened his arms and you found him inside it, getting smooches here and there as he hugged you. He would play with your hair, draw stars on the naked back of yours, and you would draw circles on his chest as you listen to the small heart beat in him. 

His heart was beating because of you.

“Hey, that noise in there is because of ya.” Atsumu kissed you on the forehead. 

“Oh really, yer not special, Miya, listen to mine!” you said with a glare after hitting him playfully on his chest.

“Uhuh...can I kiss it? Like this?” Atsumu continues his attack on your chest and you laughed loudly as he starts skimming his fingers on your waist and your tummy. He was smiling and laughing into the attack. 

Atsumu thinks that even if it is true that he is a fool, at least he is a fool that is so foolishly in love with you. 

[norarigby]

フェア関西のルームメイト二名 (The Two Roommates from Fair Kansai)

Chapter 4: The Messages

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Description: In which while typing a roommate ad online, the famed Miya Atsumu, (23) MSBY Jackals Setter, makes a detrimental typo that leads to an influx of women applicants. Confused, but not completely opposed (the idiot), Miya Atsumu lands on a formidable candidate. Y/n L/n. A Biotechnology major at Kansai University, looking for a change after her last disastrous roommates and some space from a particular complication. It’s odd, but it’ll work. Maybe a little too well.

Pairings: Miya Atsumu x Female Reader

Warnings: A single expletive at the very very end.

Word Count: ~1k

A/n: This is kind of a filler chapter, sorry. We're getting to the good stuff soon, I promise. (also I was thinking only of kake udon while writing this and I will be having a bowl of it after I post this)

“I’m home!” Y/n announced as she took off her shoes at the entrance. She was excited to tell her mom about the news, but she was going back and forth about if she should tell her about the elephant in the room. Her mother would have one of two reactions: a little too excited that she was moving in with a male roommate or wouldn’t allow her to move in period. Either way, the more she thought about it, keeping her roommate’s gender a secret seemed like the best course of action. Besides, her mom would never be the wiser. She just hoped he wouldn’t be there when her mom would help her move in.

“Kitchen!” Her mom’s voice rang throughout the small home.

Y/n’s mom didn’t need to announce her presence in the kitchen, she could smell it from the front door. The homemade kakejiru smelled so divine that Y/n almost forgot that it was the middle of August. A bowl of kake udon could just never be beat, no matter the weather.

Rounding the corner, Y/n joined her mom at the stove to get a better smell of the broth, “Mama, your broth smells amazing as always!”

“Ah, I just didn’t have the energy to make anything else,” She moved over to the sink to wash her hands. “How did the meeting with your possible future roommate go, hm? Any luck?” “Yeah! I just got a text a couple minutes ago saying I have the room.” Y/n leaned against the counter and picked at the nori, “It’ll be interesting to say the least, but I think it’ll be alright.”

Y/n’s mom began chopping up the green onions, “Well, it doesn’t need to be perfect and you certainly don’t have to be best friends. You just need something normal. Especially after…” She trailed off.

“Mom, it’s okay-”

She paused her chopping for a moment and turned to Y/n, “I just want the best for you and you deserve good people in your life is all I was trying to say.”

Her mom returned to chopping the green onions and Y/n decided to not comment on the tear that fell as she did. Y/n could tell she wasn’t the only one still recollecting. In the midst of all of her troubles, her mom had her fair share of her own. At the end of the day, it was just the two of them both trying to pick up the pieces together. It’s among a few reasons why Y/n had moved back with her mom for so long. But they could both feel it as she was approaching her senior year of college. Even with everything, they both needed to learn how to let go. And it was anything but easy.

Finishing up with the green onions, her mom transferred them to a serving bowl, “Well, I think that should be it. Let me boil the noodles and you can get me caught up with school and things over dinner. Okay, love?”

“Sounds good.”

~~

The alarm clock next to her bed was shining a bright red 12:34 AM in her face. Usually she was out by now, but a late night texting session with her new roommate inspired this spontaneous late night. She thought about just ignoring his text in the morning, but had grown curious as to why he not only would reach out to her only a couple hours after he last texted but also why he was so up late. Y/n wasn’t one to stereotype people, but Atsumu definitely seemed like the 'be in bed by 8, get up at 5' gym bro type. Then again, in the few hours she'd known Atsumu, she guessed he was more of a 'fly by the seat of his pants', 'do whatever, whenever' type.

From: Atsumu So this totally might seem desperate, but what are you thinking for a move in date? I just want to make sure to be there to help and whatever.

Y/n leaned her head back, she hadn’t really thought about it yet. Her mom had asked the same question at dinner, but she mostly just brushed it aside--too anxious that her mom would start asking too many questions. Regardless, it couldn’t be sooner than a couple days at least. She needed to pack and she still had school and work to worry about. Doing some quick math in her head she determined she could probably get everything packed and ready to move in by the weekend.

As she typed out the message, she hesitated. This weekend. That was so soon. It had been 8 months since she moved back and where that wasn’t a very long time, it was enough to make her heart hurt to leave. But she couldn’t put off this date for forever--she had agreed to move in with Atsumu and she was sure he was anxious to get her to pay her part of the rent. So she pushed those feelings aside for the time being and hit send on the text.

From: Y/n I think I should be able to get everything packed and ready by this weekend. Fingers crossed.

From: Atsumu Sounds good. I’ll see you then!

~~

Atsumu set his phone down on his side table and ran his hands over his face. It was well past his bedtime and he could fault nothing except for these dumb feelings. He had met this girl for maybe 20 minutes earlier today and had one texting conversation with her, he should not have been this giddy. Osamu’s rom coms were rubbing off on him.

Sitting up in his bed, he slapped both of his cheeks with his hands, “Miya Atsumu, we will not be catching feelings for our roommate. It’s weird and will one hundred percent make her uncomfortable so cut it out.”

He tried to emulate his old upperclassmen to make it stick. It most definitely didn’t work, but maybe if he just said it enough times it would get through his thick skull.

Ping!

From: Y/n See you then. Good night :)

….Fuck.