#you know just to get the creative juices flowing in general haha

[im-no-jedi]

me waking up today: hey maybe now that I’ve finished the story for Pokémon SV, I can get back to writing again!

Firebrand: no 😌✨

me:

[myulalie]

Author interview

@aceon-ice tagged me and I’m really looking forward to this, thank you ♥

1. How many works do you have on ao3:

165 and I am extremely upset because Alex Rider got more than Teen Wolf and I can’t seem to catch up D:

2. What's my total ao3 wc:

1 047 026. wow. apparently I wrote 400k in 2020 and I’ve been putting out between 100 and 200k every year since, just wow.

3. What are my top 5 fics by kudos:

Mixing business with pleasure (Explicit, Malec, Shadowhunters)

Alec has to go to the Seelie Queen herself and strike a deal, release Jace from the curse in exchange of… what, exactly? He has nothing to offer. Magnus Bane is the warlock who grants wishes. His father is a Prince of Hell after all, the demon of lust… maybe Alec has something to offer then.

Yeah this fic took off alright, I really liked the concept ♥

Eyes on Fire (Teen, Sterek, Teen Wolf)

When a rival pack goes after Scott and his friends, Stiles finds himself caught in the crossfire. With his subsequent turning to haunt him among other nightmares, Stiles has to learn how to control his new abilities and make something of a situation he never wanted for himself, much less with the tensions that linger in Beacon Hills since the awakening of the Nemeton. As he eventually figures out how to be a werewolf, he finally finds common ground with one Derek Hale, catching feelings as he goes. The unexpected alliance might be just what Beacon Hills needs to bring the established werewolf packs together once and for all.

This was my first reverse bang and I finally tried my hand at werewolf!Stiles, I had a lot of fun coming up with the fic to match the art.

Deepest Desires (give in) (General, Malec, Shadowhunters)

Were-cats are good luck by shadowhunters' standards, so when a black, jewelry covered cat appears at the Institute, Alec pays him his respects. He needs it, considering the messes Clary and Jace keep dragging him in. Alec certainly doesn't expect the were-cat to take a liking to him, and even less to start flirting with him...

Now I want to read it again haha

A piece of night sky (Teen, Malec, Shadowhunters)

Alec is doing his best to keep the city safe. With no support from the Clave, the New York Institute is desperately understaffed. He begins patrolling with help from the Downworld factions - which proves to be tricky at best, and becomes almost impossible when the werewolves start hunting Alec.  His siblings have no idea of what he’s up to at night and to keep them all safe Alec needs to keep it that way. Then, he meets the High Warlock of Brooklyn. Suddenly, patrolling also includes pop songs and bird puns in between watching someone's back when fighting demons. But, what’s one more secret to keep?

This was my first collab with a beta and an artist for a bang, I’m exceptionally proud of this one!

(Vir)Gin and Tonic (Mature, Malec, Shadowhunters)

Alec and Magnus have barely met when the High Warlock asks for virgin shadowhunter energy in exchange for Clary’s memories. Naturally, Jace offers Alec’s virginity. It doesn’t go according to plan.

The first fic in this list is actually a remix of this one with a slightly different take on virginity x)

4. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Yes, always! I just love interacting with other fans, it’s nice to know someone actually read your fic and noticed details or reacted to some choices you made in the narrative. Also it can be a great way to find new ideas and motivation, I wish I could be more invested in writing communities to keep those creative juices flowing.

5. What fic has the angstiest ending?

I’d say Dangerous Tastes (Explicit, Yalex, Alex Rider), it’s a bit of a star-crossed lovers romance and the ending is particularly bittersweet, albeit hopeful.

After a failed assassination attempt during his horse ride around the property, Alex gets a bodyguard against his will. He keeps flirting with danger from then on, even at the risk of getting his heart broken.

6. What fic has the happiest ending?

Oh, definitely 17 Suits (Explicit, Malec, Shadowhunters)! Alec and Magnus find common ground over the one thing that pushed them apart all throughout the story.

Magnus Bane, a sworn bachelor, receives his fair share of wedding invitations on a regular basis and makes sure his friends get through their weddings unscathed. One dark, wounded and mysterious Alec Lightwood is not going to rain on Magnus’ parade as he celebrates the best day of his loved ones’ lives.

7. Do you write crossovers?

Not really, I don’t read them either. I do write fusion fics though, specifically Pokémon like I did with Idris Tour Sweethearts (General, Malec, Shadowhunters) for instance.

Alec is fascinated by dragon types and has learned everything about them in books. He’s always dreamed of finding them in the wild and see them for himself, but he never went on his journey with a Pokémon and now, it’s too late to travel the world. Except, is it? Alec’s siblings are all grown up, and he doesn’t have a job — or friends — to keep him in his hometown. He could leave and attempt to complete the Pokédex, hopefully meeting some dragons along the way. Maybe he’ll even find love, like so many Idris Tour sweethearts before him… But the winner of Pokémon beauty Contests, Top Coordinator Magnus Bane, couldn’t possibly want more than one night in Alec’s arms. Right?

8. Have you received hate on ao3?

No? but then I usually assume good faith so unless you’re insulting me or my mom I’ll either think the comment is clumsy but the person meant well, or just move on. 

9. Do you write smut?

Yeah, surprisingly. I was never really interested in smut, would even skip smut scenes for the longest time but eventually I found it useful in some stories and then I made a point of doing kinktober (Malec, Shadowhunters / Sterek, Teen Wolf) and smutember (Yalex, Alex Rider) just to figure out how to fit the prompts into some ideas and it’s been a lot of fun!

10. Have you had a fic get stolen?

I don’t think so or at least I’m not aware if there has been one. I did occasionally share ideas that got passed around and written by somebody else which is always uncomfortable but that’s on me for both sharing and not mentioning it wasn’t up for grabs lmao

11. Have you had a fic get translated?

Nope! I thought of translating a couple myself though, I’m just too lazy x)

12. Have you co-written a fic?

Several! Even though @spark-draws will deny it I do consider them a co-writer because they came up with a good chunk of the outline and I implemented major edits due to their feedback on The Mortal Instruments: Skyrim (Mature, Malec, Shadowhunters). 

Magnus and Alec are now enemies who have been saddled up with a mysterious quest to save Skyrim. Will rivalry, distrust and fierce and dangerous dragons get the better of them? Or will they find some much needed guidance on the slopes of the Throat of the World, where a mysterious brotherhood holds some of the answers they so desperately need?

I also recently worked on Vastly Different Things (Teen, Yalex, Alex Rider) with @polarnachtsblog as a thank you fic for our pinch-hitter in the Yalex Secret Santa. We literally wrote parts of the fic on our own then merged it all together with minor edits and transitions, it was a lot of fun!

Alex almost gets tossed from a helicopter into a river in Chile, and spends some quality time with a certain assassin.

13. What's your fav ship?

Right now I’m on a roll for Sam Carter x Ba’al (Stargate SG-1) but my one true pairing is definitely Helen Blackthorn x Aline Penhallow (Shadowhunters). I love them. so much.

14. What's a WIP you want to finish but never will?

I don’t know, I’ve completed WIPs several years after I started them so I tend to not consider a fic discontinued until I’ve deleted the fic from the platform, and considering most of my WIPs have not been posted anywhere… ;)

15. What are my writing strengths?

I’m really good at “getting it done” I think because productivity breeds productivity. If you get started and power through long enough, it becomes easier and you can keep going and enjoy yourself while you’re at it!

Same with edits, I’m not afraid to change things (although I can be lazy). It also applies to plotting/outlining, I’m an excellent planner, sometimes too much of a planner though.

Style wise I’ve been told I’m good at writing fight scenes and setting, I do enjoy my descriptions!

16. What are my writing weaknesses?

I’ve always thought I’m terrible at dialogue!

I can get stuck in a writing slump from too much planning.

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages on ao3?

I used to really like it, especially since I’m bilingual myself. I wanted to use some fancy script to have the translation appear when you hover or link it to the notes and then back to the exact line in the story but I couldn’t figure it out xD

Nowadays I like the much simpler “POV character doesn’t speak the language” or “blah blah blah, they said in French”. You get it or you don’t x) 

18. What's the first fandom you wrote for?

Either Naruto or Harry Potter, let’s say Harry Potter because there is a completed fic I can actually remember lmao.

19. What fandom/ship have you not written but want to?

Definitely Stargate SG-1 these days because I’m on a Sam/Ba’al binge!

20. What's your fav fic you've written?

Right about now it’s Blue for Brooklyn (Teen, Malec, Shadowhunters) but it may change depending on my mood!

Asmodeus is a legend among Shadowhunters and Magnus has a duty to the Downworld. When a renegade warlock unleashes a powerful demon in the streets, he has no choice but to get involved.

Tagging: @polarnachtsblog @geekmom13 @brightasstars @sterekxhale @countessrivers @1lostone @strangesoulmates @kelkblr @lastlymatt @ravenjames @junemermaid @freesirius4life @turtlesnails

[altosk]

GETTING TO KNOW YOU.

respond to the following prompts out of character. then, tag others that you'd like to get to know a little bit better!

ROLEPLAYER NAME: gloomy

ROLEPLAYER PRONOUNS: she/they

MUSE NAME: Raven w/ sideblogs for Karol, Vicious and my oc Kai

PREFERRED COMMUNICATION: tumblr dm's is fine but i don't mind giving out my discord if asked.

EXPERIENCE: ahhh i've been rping since early teen years. raven's being one of my oldest muses.

PREFERRED ROLEPLAY TYPE: i like a little bit of everything. drama and angst are always a treat with some fluff to bandaid it. i love writing fast paced scenes even if i may not be the best at writing them. the flow of learning how to write fighting and combat is suuuper fun. getting more into the steamy stuff... i don't mind writing some but i get shy when it gets a little too xxx. especially on public tumblr blogs haha.

PET PEEVES & DEALBREAKERS: i've always been the worst at this as i don't feel like i've been too picky with things.

Don't judge my ships. Unfortunately, I had someone talking shit behind my back once but a friend had told me about it. Ever since then I kind of don't do ship content on Tumblr unless we talk it out in private and plan it out but if my ship is a notp to you, that's fine. You will be blocked without question if I find out that you weren't honest to my face. xoxo.

Pls don't become upset with me because of my pace of rp I'm saaaaur slow. While most of my beautiful friends and followers are understanding with this, it is just a thing that's always worried me. Hah. Raven is also definitely priority over my other side blogs, his muse is the strongest.

PLOTS OR MEMES: both are fun. i need to post more meme prompts honestly but I looove sending them to people if one resonates with me. I generally avoid the NSFW ones ha ha. I love plotting with people, too, so never be afraid to pop into my dms.

LONG REPLIES OR SHORT REPLIES: I feel like I always do like.. medium sized replies LOL! But I am fine with all sizes !! I definitely take shorter replies/threads to be more goofy threads for joking around, being a lil silly. We do a lil trollin.

BEST TIME TO WRITE: I always get the most creative juices at night. I've never been much of a morning person and then my job takes a good chunk of my afternoon. Sometimes I try to squeeze in a bit of writing whenever my brain has got the tippy tappies. I also spend a lot of my mornings before work playing Frontlines PvP on FFXIV.. so.. yeah.

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSES: I sure hope not !! The only character I've really ever resonated with was Bennett who I use as my OOC Icon. For a short time in my life I did heavily project on my OC but since then he's gotten much better characterization and I've definitely taken a step away from leaning on him mentally.

tagged by: @serabellyms (thanks for tagging blows keesses) tagging: my usual victims @bravewolfvesperia, @voidtouched-blue, @musesofawolf, @the-leyline-directory, if you guys want and anyone else who wishes to fill this out.

[ciaossu-imagines]

Trust me you’re not alone in imagining fictional characters as a coping mechanism. It’s something that’s helped me cope since I was a young child, and especially now as it’s been a rough year. I’m happy to hear others also find comfort in this too! For me personally I have fictional others in both romantic and platonic relationships. I found having a found family in fictional characters is really helpful especially growing up when your own family situation is rough.

My fictional other is Reborn from KHR (which might expose who I am a bit 🤭 but I am shy and socially awkward so on anon I shall stay!). I find the wacky and absurd nature of KHR makes coming up with different scenarios and headcanons a lot of fun. For me my favourite sort of scenarios to imagine with my fictional other are different AUs and how my ships come together and behave in those situations. The most recent one I’ve been thinking of is a Cinderella-esque aristocracy story! This not only helps me detach from my actual life a little better but also helps get my creative juices flowing. So double win for me!

Anyway, sorry for rambling, just know you're not alone with that coping method, and it has also helped me so much in my life! I hope it can continue to aid you, as I know healing is never easy and it takes time, but stay strong and know that many of us are cheering for you!

Aww, thank you so much. For both sharing this and for being so incredibly sweet. Sometimes it really does help just to know I'm not alone in this, in using this coping mechanism or for getting so attached to fictional characters and knowing that it helps others and is a healthy-ish thing to do. So your message definitely made me smile and feel better. I mean, I've always kind of coped in this way and have comfort characters and fictional others from childhood but I just always felt like I was supposed to have outgrown doing so and so do sometimes feel guilty about still coping this way. Though now, between instant messages on here and ask box messages, I'm realizing it's a very normal thing and that a lot of people find comfort in it! And it's so cool to learn that, like me, you have fictional others in both romantic and platonic sense too because I've mostly just heard of other people having romantic fictional others only.

And even if it exposes who you are to me a bit (I have a good guess), don't you worry! I get how hard it is to come off anon because I'm generally a shy person myself and I would never expose an anon, even when I know who they are. If that's your comfort zone, I fully accept and embrace it and just am glad you took the time to send in a message. And I love your fictional other - KHR is absurd in a lot of ways and Reborn himself is just such a complex, interesting, colourful character and I can only imagine how many fun situations he could get himself into haha. I think your most recent AU is such an amazingly cool AU too! If you ever wanted to share some of your headcanons or thoughts on it with me, either in the ask box or via instant message, I would honestly be so interested in hearing about it! Please don't apologize either - you didn't ramble and I enjoyed every word! And thank you so much again for the sweet, fun message and the support :)

[corancoranthemagicalman]

Coran! 💜💜💜 for the fanfic writer ask game

Also sorry these arent in order

⏳ 🎶 🛒 👀

Liv!! 💙💙

⏳ : How long does it take you to write a fic, or a chapter?

It really depends, genuinely! On one hand, I wrote, edited, and published a 6k fic in two days. On that same hand, I wrote 30k words approx. in like, five days? But that was on a piece that I was just writing for me to get the creative juices flowing so I wasn't worried about word choices as much as getting scenes down. And that was during Christmas break.

But on the other hand, my current WIP which is almost at 30k has taken me all month between trying to find the time to write, editing, and research. Lots and lots of research on this one that isn't even making it into the final piece. Haha!

So I'll say, on average, if I'm free of time, I could easily write probably 10k in two days? Eh?

🎶 : Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

Yes!! All the time!! It's crucial to my process. Like, that same WIP I was telling you about. Lately I haven't been able to listen to my music while writing which is why this last leg of the fic is taking forever to write!

I either have custom playlists for whatever ship I'm writing for, or I have a very generic pining playlist full of my favorites. What's looping definitely depends on what I'm writing, but I guess lately Share Your Address by Ben Platt and Don't You Dare (Make Me Fall In Love With You) by Kaden MacKay have really been critical pieces in my playlists.

🛒 : What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.

It depends! I think I definitely overall default to a lot of storm imagery. I.E. Lightning, thunder, clouds over the horizon, etc etc.

But it also is completely dependent on what I'm writing for! For instance, in my WIP at the moment I'm using a surprising amount of dancing metaphors? But I think dancing metaphors are integral to my interpretation of those characters, so I think if I write for this ship more often I will probably come back to them.

That being said, now that I'm thinking about it, I think I'm just drawn to ships where the storm metaphor works.... Gentlebeard... Destiel... Hell, even in my VLD days I did it. Damn. Did I use storms for GOmens writing too?

Also for something other than a theme/imagery, I typically love writing First Kisses even if I never tag them? As such? I love that. But surprisingly I've really stepped outside of that with some of my later Supernatural works and definitely within OFMD. My "Getting Together" OFMD fic they DIDN'T EVEN KISS. THEY DIDN'T EVEN KISS. 2018!Coran would shake in FEAR at the animal I have become.

👀 : Tell me about an up and coming wip please!

I've kind of done that already??? Whoops??

Okay, so here's the thing:

I'm supposed to be finishing the third installment of Bang Bang! And it's coming along, I promise!!! But I was having issues with some of the transitional parts. It just wasn't flowing, and I needed a brain break so I could come back with fresh eyes.

So I started the aforementioned and thus far unnamed WIP.

(It's a Bagginshield fic. Whoops. I'm so sorry loyal followers. I am trash.)

And it was just supposed to be a break!! Just a 6k at the max joke-centric fic!! To make me laugh and to post and then to go back to what I actually was trying to work on this month! [The third installment of Bang Bang! plus another WIP I have yet to mention (͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)] But then it quickly devolved evolved into... a 30k beast of pining and cultural discussion and guilt and love.

I cannot wait until it's done. So I can be free from it. I've loved writing it but at what cost.

Since it's you my dear Liv. If you want a snippet of the WIP, just send me another eye emoji with a number, and I'll send you a line off the corresponding page number. For reference, there's 64 pages so like go off on number picking. But I don't even know if you like Bagginshield, so I won't subject you to it anymore than I've already subjected you to my rambling, haha!

Thanks for the ask, dear! This was fun!

Emoji FanFic Writer Ask Game !!

[tommybaholland]

Hiya! Can I request a drabble (or whatever you think will fit best) for Joe from Sk8 where his crush would great him with a hug but one day she stops hugging him? She just gives him a little smile and wave. He later finds out that some of his fangirls told her she was acting desperate, so she started avoiding him? Thank you so much!

when his crush becomes distant

featuring: joe (x fem!reader)

let the creativity juices flow for this...there’s some demeaning language but nothing super crazy! enjoy :)

he loved your hugs. 

he loves seeing you in general. you’re extremely easygoing as well as fun to be around, he needed someone like you in his life. he’s happy he met you and remembers that moment like it was yesterday.

you worked in this organic produce shop where he often liked to buy ingredients for his restaurant. he had never seen you there before and he was a regular so he was automatically intrigued. he soon found out that the owners had sold the business to your parents and you were working there until you saved enough to live on your own. 

he’d shamelessly admit that you’re attractive but you were also really smart and showed him all the best vegetables and plants to buy for his restaurant. he came by nearly every day afterward. you had quickly become friends and saw each other often. normally by now, he would’ve hooked up with you at least once. however, something in his head, or rather his chest, told him to not rush this, to nurture and take time to get to know you. 

a few months had passed and you had gotten pretty close. the first time you greeted him with a hug, his heart almost fell out of his butt, he felt like he was in heaven in this embrace. soon he began to get in the habit of accepting hugs from you every time you’d see each other and he certainly wasn’t complaining. 

however, everything changed when he invited you to S for the first time. 

he honestly didn’t think you would say yes as he knew how much you liked to sleep and would rather be doing that than watching skateboarding at midnight. 

“sure. i need to get out more actually,” you agreed. 

he was shocked but again, didn’t mind your company. he never minded your company, in fact, especially when he gets to feel your arms wrapped around him from behind and your body pressed against his back as you ride on your motorcycle with him. he was thinking he was definitely in over his head, he almost never lets girls ride on his bike. 

that night, of course, he had a beef set up. he had purposefully picked a fight with cherry, betting that cherry would have to ‘kiss carla’ if he won. 

he felt like everything was going to change for the better between you two. but he was so wrong. 

he showed you around and had you meet some of his friends, some of which were his posse of fangirls. they seemed very nice and supportive of him, accepting you like one of their own. he showed you the best spot to watch the races, on top of a small cliff that had enough space for someone to sit on. he left you there to view his beef with cherry. 

he had won by the nose of his board which led to an argument with cherry about how he wasn't that good if he couldn’t even completely win. this conversation ended in a rematch the next night with the stakes being set as cherry having to fully make out with carla. 

meanwhile, you were about to climb down the cliff to go meet back up with joe until you heard some giggly voices below you. you hid behind the small shrub that grew from the rock, recognizing their voices as the girls you had met earlier. 

“so what is that girl his new piece?” 

“guess so.”

“wow, didn’t think he’d ever go that low. his standards are literally beneath the ground.” 

“i’ve seen them around town together and she hugs him pretty much anytime she sees him.

“haha, how desperate.”

“don’t worry about it, ladies. her time will come and then he’ll show up here with some other bitch.” 

you stopped listening as their chatter turned into giggles again, their words running on repeat in your head. you thought they were really nice but you guess that’s why it’s called ‘saving face.’ 

you stayed in that spot until you were sure that they were gone. you didn’t really want to see joe either but he was your only ride home. 

“hey!” he greeted you excitedly as he approached you. “what did you think? i’m pretty good right?”

“yeah, haha. the best,” you replied somewhat monotonously. “listen, do you think we could go now? i’m feeling pretty tired.”

“oh. sure,” he agreed, leading you back to his bike. 

the ride home was quiet. you felt somewhat awkward about the whole thing, not knowing how to bring it up to him. you didn’t hug him goodbye, opting for a simple wave and half-hearted smile as you entered your house. 

he felt like something was off, really off. he hadn’t seen you or spoken to you in several days. you didn’t respond to any of his texts and weren’t at the shop when he would go see you. he figured that maybe you may have fallen ill or something, remembering that you didn’t look too good after his beef. 

a week had passed of no contact until he finally saw you late at night, sitting by yourself looking up at the starry night sky. 

it was late and you were never up this late. 

“hey,” he greeted softly when he approached you.

“joe?” you questioned. “what’re you doing here?”

he chuckled lightly as he sat down next to you. “i think i should be the one asking you that.”

“i just like to sit out here sometimes.”

he looked at the non-existent watch on his wrist. “after midnight? that doesn’t sound like the you i know. so what’s up? i haven’t seen you in what feels like forever.” 

“it’s nothing, joe.” 

“now, see, i know it’s not ‘nothing’ because you never call me ‘joe.��” it was true. you usually called him by his full first name, as he originally introduced himself to you. the nicknames you came up for him arrived not too long after. 

“that’s what all your fangirls call you,” you remarked.

“and…?”

“seems like that’s all i am to you. no, actually, i’m just desperate,” you ranted. 

he looks over at you, puzzled. “where did you get that idea?” 

you shook your head, feeling tears spring up in your eyes. 

he sighed once he realized. “you heard them, right?”

you nodded as you wiped away one of your tears.

“they just say stuff like that because they have nothing better to do. i appreciate their support, i really do, but they can really get in the way of my real, everyday life, including my love life,” he explained. 

you finally turned your head to look at him, wanting to hear more. 

“listen, i...really like you,” he confessed, holding eye contact with you. “it’s very possible to turn into love. whatever they said, none of it is true. the truth is, they don’t really know me so i’m telling you that my feelings for you are very real. i’m so sorry if they made you think less than that.” 

you don’t know what to say, this moment didn’t even feel real. he continued to talk when you couldn’t. 

“so i’d love to continue spending time with you if you’ll let me.”

“i…” you hesitated. “i’d like that.” 

“perfect,” he smiled, continuing to look into your eyes. 

“is this the part where you lean in for a kiss, kojiro?” you asked playfully. 

“nah,” he replied. “we’ve got plenty of time for that. c’mere, let me hold you.”

he slung his arm around your shoulders, allowing you to snuggle up into his side as you both looked up at the stars together.

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[capnhanbers]

Hey Mod! Do you have any advice for someone like me who wants to write but gets super distracted and/or can't write cause perfectionism is an ass lol

hi lan! :D 👋

HMMMMMM I mean ok i'm not edjumucated so i don't know like REAL advice or w/e but i totally relate on distraction and perfectionism. like boy oh boy. couple things

ONE: write by hand!! like physically write in a journal. i do this for brainstorming and it always gets my juices flowing a lot easier. i also talk out loud to myself as if it's a board meeting haha, all "okay so this is what we covered last quarter, NOW where are we goin w/ it gentlemen." this is helpful on distraction cuz you can better isolate urself w/ that notepad than you can on a computer, and talking to yourself is engaging. i usually do this out on my porch--virtually nothing i can wander off to do within easy reach.

TWO: because yes i suuuuuper struggle w/ like. every few words i'll just automatically pop over to another tab. i'm all over the place. it's awful. programs like FocusWriter really help, makes it slightly harder to pop away (haven't been using it recently cuz my computer's ass about it, but highly recommend)

and THREE the one main advice i have for perfectionism because i don't know an awesome way to combat it: try to stick to deadlines! and here's why i'll tell you why, one perfectionist to another. i think it's awesome to hold yourself to a high standard, but tooo high and you're paralyzed. if you try to adhere to deadlines, you're manufacturing a little pressure for yourself, and the idea is to not give yourself enough time to pick apart every little thread and detail. this is a double edged sword, because being a perfectionist means you might take a missed deadline hard, so the important condition of it is: be very gentle w/ yourself.

(last thing is, of course, Consume Good Writing so you can pick out all the good parts like a creative buffet, but that's just a general rule of thumb haha)

[deliberatelyvague]

Overwhelmed (leviathan x gn!reader)

Started: April 11, 2020 at 10:48

Ended: April 11, 2020 at 11:06

Word Count: 598

Shipping(s): [Leviathan x reader]

Trigger Warning(s): self harm (in the form of scratching), general anxiety, anxiety attack, kind of a sensory overload (maybe)

Author’s Note: nothing really, other than maybe sorry for it being so short, my creative juices just weren’t flowing for this one.

Prompt/Request: Hi again, so uh Could you maybe make a Levi x selfharm reader?(female) The reader is an otaku and very shy and has social anxiety and often takes the "mother role"?(takes care of everyone, and acts like a mom) And maybe the reader feels awful because they yelled at the brothers because they all acted like little kids(so their usual self haha) and just goes in a full mother mode?- (Mother mode is due trauma but that doesn't matter-) Ahaha love your writings,, i know i said that a lot sorry,,

————-

Your eyes darted around the six boys surrounding you, your pulse quickening and your breath becoming very short.

They were acting like children, if they didn’t stop, then they would inevitably hurt themselves, how didn’t they not see it coming? How was it not obvious to them.

Not all do them were really doing anything, it was just Satan, Asmo, and Mammon, like usually, but your brain wasn’t processing things correctly, and you knew you were having an anxiety attack, too many things were happening at once, you couldn’t help them all, they just needed to-

“Stop!” You yelled, tears falling from your eyes as your hands gripped onto the wrists that you so desperately wanted to scratch. All of the boy’s eyes drifted over to you, with questioning looks on their faces.

“[Y/N], what? We do this every night?” Satan recalled.

“I can’t- there’s too much going on, can you all just please settle down. One of you is going to get hurt and I can’t- there’s nothing that I can-” not able to finish your sentence, you shove away from the table and go back to your room, your fingers finding solace digging into your wrists, leaving scratch marks that are sure to bruise.

You shut the door and go bury yourself in your best. You couldn’t believe that you had just done that, right in front of them. What would they think of you now? They’re probably planning your removal from their dorm and move to one of the other dorms.

You wallow in your thoughts for longer, your fingernails still going hard on your wrist until there’s a knock at the door.

You sit up, looking over at it.

“Hey Normie, you didn’t even finish your dinner, so I brought it to make you eat.” You heard Levi’s voice from outside your door. “I’m coming in.”

He opened the door, and you immediately felt comforted when you saw the purple of your boyfriend’s hair and smelled the ocean smell that he always was permeating.

He set the bowl on your bedside table and sat awkwardly on your bed.

“I-I don’t know much how to do this whole comforting thing. It’s much easier in the game, I have options to pick from, but not with you, Normie. Now, tell me what to do, please.”

You shrugged, wrapping your arms around yourself. You didn’t want to seem needy, and no matter how much he offered to comfort you and tell you it wasn’t a big deal to him, you didn’t feel like he should.

“I’m not believing that, Normie.” He traveled to the head of your bed, spreading his arms. “Now c’mere.”

You were more than happy to oblige, slipping over to him and lying in between his two legs as he rubbed your back.

“Now tell me what’s wrong, Normie.”

“It was just.. a lot tonight at dinner. I’ve always been the ‘parental’ one in any friendships I’ve ever had, and the idea of Lucifer yelling at them and them getting punished when I could’ve done something, it just didn’t sit well with me. But, I couldn’t figure out what to say, so I just kind of.. freaked out? I don’t know. I think I just need to rest here for a few minutes, please?”

“Of course, Normie, like I’d let you do anything else.”

You smiled gently, melting into him more as he played with your hair.

————

This was written by me in no way trying to romanticize mental illnesses. I try to write what I feel would help me in the moment. I completely understand that mental illnesses don’t just ‘disappear’ when you’ve figured out that someone loves you or someone helps you once- that’s why I don’t write what happens after in most cases. If you are struggling, please reach out to anyone you trust, or call a hotline.

[rpgmgames]

March’s Featured Game: acai cOrner

DEVELOPER(S): moca & Mitty ENGINE: RPG Maker 2003 GENRE: RPG, Adventure, Surreal SUMMARY: acai cOrner is about Mizuki, someone who has fallen into the sewers and who happens to find their favorite electric guitar! Upon obtaining the guitar, Mizuki turns into a magical girl who must defend herself against spooky sewer creatures using the guitar's magical powers.

Download the game here! Our Interview With The Dev Team Below The Cut!

Introduce yourself! *moca: Hi, I'm moca, a Starbucks barista aspiring to be a writer and game developer. I have been making RPG Maker games for about six years now, with my first two projects being a Pokémon fan-game and a Corpse Party fan-game. Those two happen to be my two favorite franchises as well! I have also created the RPG Maker game MOMOKA (IGMC 2018). I have founded a group called 'Team Shibu!' dedicated to making horror games! Our current project is a RPG Maker survival horror game named 'Katharsis'.

*Mitty: Hey there, I'm Mitty! I've been working with Moca on several games for a while now, helping with mostly graphics! Please support him, as he is very kind and hardworking!! I'm also the main developer of a game called "Marinette", so I hope you'll check that one out too, when the demo is released!

What is your project about? What inspired you to create this game initially? *moca: acai cOrner is an experimental spooky RPG Maker game that only uses 4 colors! You are a magical girl with a just-as-magical electric guitar that you use to fend off spooky sewer slimes and other weird enemies you find in the surreal sewer system. It's half exploration and half RPG battles. What inspired me to create acai cOrner initially was to actually get myself back into the groove of making games again. I had just recently came back from a hiatus and found myself having trouble getting back into the development of 'Katharsis'. That's when I decided to make a short, experimental game to get the juices flowing.

How long did you work on your project? *moca: acai cOrner was finished in just about under a month!

Did any other games or media influence aspects of your project? *moca: I had always wanted to make a Yume Nikki-like game and thought this was the perfect opportunity to try. So for the more surreal parts of acai cOrner, I took inspiration from Yume Nikki and a Homestuck random planet generator. Gameplay wise though, I took inspiration from a RPG Maker game called Ghost Suburb 0! I really loved how unique it was, especially with the timer and no dialogue aspect. I knew I wanted to do something with a timer, so I tried a rogue-like approach with the gameplay.

Have you come across any challenges during development? How have you overcome or worked around them? *moca: If you played any of my previous projects, you know that acai cOrner is vastly different than anything that I have ever done. I'm so used to using words to describe the violence in my games, so when it came to making the story, I had a lot of trouble. It wasn't until I looked deeper into why people like these types of games that I had realized that people like to interpret the story on their own, guided by exploration, to enjoy these games. After that, I let loose a bit and made something more open-ended. Another challenge was the difficulty. I was the only one playtesting the game, and since I knew the game front and back, and had no trouble getting the ending. That's why when I sent out demos to friends, I was really discouraged to hear that the experience was mostly frustrating and rage quitting-inducing haha. I worked closely with their feedback and made changes accordingly to make the experience less frustrating but still difficult. *Mitty: I think I was going through a weird artblock during the development of the game, so for some of the illustrations and backdrops for each area's fights, Moca sketched out the basic idea of what it could look like, and I just put my spin on it! It made the work much easier and faster!

Did any aspects of your project change over time? How does your current project differ from your initial concept? *moca: Well, the game was meant to be short so there wasn't room for any big changes. Sure there are a couple gameplay changes and enemy tweaks, but not anything mindblowing. I added in the idea of making four surreal worlds kinda last minute, if that counts, haha.

What was your team like at the beginning? How did people join the team? If you don’t have a team, do you wish you had one or do you prefer working alone? *moca: In the beginning, it was just me! I didn't think I was gonna need any outside help since this was supposed to be a relatively easy project to release, but the further in development I got, the more I realized the game needed pizazz. The four color limitation wasn't enough for my lack of graphical talent. That's when I contacted Mitty about helping with the games battle backdrops and sprite animations! She is also a member of Team Shibu!, but we have collabed together even before that. Her art really made the project shine and I enjoy working with them on games! *Mitty: Moca contacted me, and I wanted to help! We are working together on another game called Katharsis, so we are quite familiar with each other. I like working with other people, especially if I'm not in the lead, it releases a bit of the pressure I feel sometimes ahaha

What is the best part of developing a game? *moca: To me, it's seeing everything come together and just... working exactly the way you envisioned it. As a game developer, you section the game off into parts to make development much more organized and faster but seeing it all come together in the end. Pure bliss *chefs kiss*. *Mitty: I like a bit of everything, but currently I've been enjoying animating and spritework, as well as map assets' designs a little more than usual!

Do you find yourself playing other RPG Maker games to see what you can do with the engine, or do you prefer to do your own thing? *moca: Mm... not really! I have an idea of what the engine can do, so when I do go out of my way to player other RPG Maker games, it's usually for writing inspiration rather than gameplay inspiration. Ghost Suburb 0 is something that I accidentally stumbled upon and immediately fell in love with it the minute I played it haha. (Fun fact: the developer of Ghost Suburb 0 is apart of Team Shibu! and is in charge of monster design!)

Which character in your game do you relate to the most and why? (Alternatively: Who is your favorite character and why?) *moca: There is a rat in the game that is internally called 'Ratthew' who leads you into a funky room. I relate them the most. *Mitty: I relate to the land sharks the most on a spiritual level. They are pretty much confused beans, and that's very relatable.

Looking back now, is there anything that regret/wish you had done differently? *moca: I wish I added more random spooky events and trap rooms. But the game was also supposed to be short and I knew that if I kept adding more and more things, development was never gonna end haha.

Do you plan to explore the game’s universe and characters further in subsequent projects, or leave it as-is? *moca: Well, by the time this interview comes out, there should be a new update for the game. The update should include 100% custom music by a talented composer, and a nerf in difficulty. As for sequels, who knows! The next time you see acai cOrner may be in 3D.

What do you most look forward to upon finishing the game? *moca: Definitely the fan reaction! The satisfaction of seeing your work being noticed by people and actually enjoying makes me happy. It's also the relief of just... finishing something! *Mitty: For this particular project I was obviously looking forward to seeing what people said about the little animations and such ahaha! I also was curious about the reaction to the timed difficulty mechanic, I had never seen anything like that before Moca presented it to me, so I had no idea on what people's feedback would be.

Is there something you’re afraid of concerning the development or the release of your game? *moca: How people will handle the difficulty. The game isn't supposed to be completed on your first playthrough, but in 2-3 playthroughs. There are rooms and places that are meant to waste your time that you should ideally skip the more you play. By later playthroughs, you should be shaving time and be better. I understand that it's not handled as best I could, but I think the experience should still be challenging and hopefully fun! *Mitty: I was a little conflicted on the timed mechanic, I loved it because it's pretty original and helps set an interesting athmosphere of worry and unease, and also seems to tell a bit of the vague story; and at the same time I don't like it much because I prefer more story-driven games and the vagueness mixed with the mechanic feels different from what I'm used to playing! I think it's more of a personal taste kind of thing, it was an experimental jam game, after all!

Do you have any advice for upcoming devs? *moca: Take it easy! Take short breaks throughout development. And most importantly, have fun. If it's a hobby and it's making you overly stressed, just take a step back!

Question from last month's featured dev @ressurflection: What would you say is the weakest part of your game development? *moca: Procrastination. I'm so bad at sticking to my own schedule, it's something that I try to keep in check when working with a team especially.

We mods would like to thank moca & Mitty for agreeing to our interview! We believe that featuring the developer and their creative process is just as important as featuring the final product. Hopefully this Q&A segment has been an entertaining and insightful experience for everyone involved!

Remember to check out acai cOrner if you haven’t already! See you next month! 

- Mods Gold & Platinum

[rey-of-luke]

2020 Fic Review

I was tagged by the lovely, amazing @musicboxmemories! Thank you so much!!

Total number of completed stories: ....do oneshots count as finished stories? Because in that case I have 3 (two of which are part of a larger oneshot collection). Most of mine are still being written very v-e-r-y slowly because my muse is VERY fickle as anyone who’s had to deal with my creative outlets well knows *looks at the like 10 vids I uploaded on my fanvid channel in the entire year and everyone else is uploading like 25+*

Total number of words: Uh.... *runs to get calculator* So if we are JUST talking about things I’ve written this year (including unpublished) I’ve written a total of... 9,445 words. In terms of PUBLISHED, I’ve written... 4,738. 

Fandoms written in: Published? Supernatural and Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (literally my shortest piece and it’s because I wanted it’s version of Lucifer to interact with Sam). Unpublished? NCIS.

Top 5 Ranked by Word Count: 1. we will always end up here 2. brother (let me be your shelter)

Top 5  Ranked by Kudos 1.  brother (let me be your shelter) 2.   we will always end up here

Top Fic Overall: Without a doubt, ‘brother (let me be your shelter)’. It doesn’t help that it was written not even a week after the Supernatural series finale aired, probably. And the fact the only other contender was my multi oneshot Samifer series.

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected? More, I guess, especially if we’re including unpublished? Largely because despite it being the first half of my last year in college I still had a lot of time to do so (we’ll see how much time I have when my internship this semester starts - which I also need to pass in order to get my degree... yay social work requirements)

What’s your own favorite story of the year? Honestly I really like both stories I posted, mostly because they’re larger parts of oneshot series. brother (let me be your shelter) has evolved into me writing more pieces about Dean Jr’s adventures in heaven with everyone and will probably include bits about his wife and kids that are still alive. Also I have sooo many ideas for my Samifer oneshot series it’s... kind of embarassing, really. 

Also in terms of unpublished... the largest word count is for my NCIS x Supernatural crossover series, which is going to comprised (if I can ever finish it) of multi oneshots involving Gibbs (and later Team Gibbs in general) taking in the Winchester’s as surrogate sons/brothers. Especially Sam because tbf he deserves to have at least SOMEONE in his corner throughout the entire series and damn it, if I want that make that person Gibbs (+ the rest of Team Gibbs) then I damn well can!!!

Did you take any writing risks this year? *gestures to ‘we will always end up here’* This entire damn series. Anything dealing with the pairing is asking to get sent hate and death threats in the fandom because of the implications... which is entirely why all the oneshots are dark and fucked up because there’s no way to NOT write Samifer without those things included. Unless it’s Sam x Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) then that can actually be considered semi healthy because Netflix!Lucifer is WAY different from SPN!Lucifer (or CAOS!Lucifer to be fair). Though honestly, I’m trying to get back into the mindset that it’s OKAY to write in fiction what Tumblr + Twitter would crucify me for, because I make sure to tag and warn accordingly. And honestly, fiction doesn’t tell you jack shit about a person in real life. I’m a social work major, and I know a LOT of people in my classes who like true crime and horror movies. Me exploring darker aspects of humanity SAFELY IN FICTION doesn’t mean I’m going to end up snapping and commiting mass murder or something, jfc. This is legit a conversation I brought up with my advisor my freshman year of college and she was so confused that people think liking certain FICTION things means you like those same things in real life. That same professor is now I believe the head of a social work department at another university.

Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the new year? Maybe just get more published/finished? Then again, that’s always my goal, haha. But I’m hoping once Walker premieres I’ll get my juices flowing again so in between my internship and fanvids I can crank out a couple stories once in awhile.

Most popular story of the year? ‘brother (let me be your shelter)’

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: ...I’m going to say ‘we will always end up here’. Just because I kind of like how creepy and fucked up I wrote Samifer in my 12x01 AU chapter and would like to know if I wrote either character decently. Also if I’m the only one who finds themselves mentally reviewing different times in the series where Lucifer’s creepy obsession with Sam can pop up, because I am forever bitter about s11+ because you literally can not convince me that Lucifer would willingly leave Sam permanently truly dead. The entirety of s5 says otherwise and that is what I hold to.

Most fun story to write? Both. ‘brother (let me be your shelter)’ lets me explore Dean Jr’s relationship with EVERYONE (Sam + Eileen, Dean, Jack, Cas, John + Mary, Eileen’s Parents, Adam + Michael... Magda... everyone I want basically) and ‘we will always end up here’ because Samifer is my guilty pleasure with little fics (especially crossover/au) so I’m indulging in it myself.

Most unintentionally telling story? ...depends upon what way you’re talking. In Tumblr terms? ‘we will always end up here’ because this site will say I’m a terrible human being and psychopath (which is actually outdated; it’s now referred to as anti social personality disorder) laying in wait. Personally? ‘brother (let me be your shelter)’ because my excited to continue the story with Dean Jr in the version of heaven created by Jack + Cas in the series finale is largely my hoping that whatever life there is after death is similar to that, aka you get to see everyone again and it’s peaceful and happy.

Biggest disappointment? My second chapter of ‘we will always end up here’, the 12x01 AU. I personally really liked it but only one person has commented and there have been no new kudos or anything since I published the CAOS x SPN chapter.

Biggest surprise: People actually liking my stuff, haha.

I tag anyone who sees that and wants to participate!!

[asksythe]

Update 2020

So people have been asking how I’m doing, after two years of more or less complete radio silence. So here it is. A little update from yours truly. 

Hello!! I’m Sythe, and I’m happy to be back. :D

In short words, 2018 and 2019 were not kind to me. My little sister passed away in 2018, and I was in depression for a long time after that. I quit my job and I just stayed at home taking care of my cats and my parents for a while. 2019... was a lot of work, a lot of up and down. I stopped being able to write things for myself. I still wrote but it was mostly commercial stuff for which I felt nothing. I went to Hawaii and to Russia and to Australia and Europe and America... and just generally a lot of places, and a lot of things happened both good and bad, and I won’t bore you with the details.  

Anyhow, the best thing that happened to me in 2019 is probably that I became a couple with someone I had been friends with for over 2 years. We... got along really well. And its only been over half a year since I stopped rejecting him but... things are really good. As in... talk about children good, and planning financial details for wedding good (also arguing about music tastes for wedding song hahaha). We have Video game dates (contra!! And Mario Kart! And he got me a Nintendo Switch! Awoowooo!! So I shared my PS4 with him!), cooking dates, Yakiniku dates, and stay at home in pajama and poke fun at each other dates. It’s good. 

We also start making mini documentaries together, and we have plans to make a low budget indie movie together too, if we both manage to get the time off our busy schedule for that.. haha.   

So I... got out of depression. I started feeling happy and feeling creative again. I resolved a lot of issues, both personal and professional. My family situation is also a lot better now. My parents are no longer so sad. I take my mom on vacations a lot. I don’t know how long she will be in good enough health for it so we are making the most of our time.  

This year 2020 has been a really good start for me. I signed the contract for another book, and I got more or less invited into a writer’s group by a veteran Hollywood scriptwriter. And I’m actually feeling like I can write again. 

So... here I am. What am I doing here again you asked? Well... I figure... I feel my creative juice flowing again. I actually feel happy when I write now (in contrast to the jaded apathy I felt in the last 2 years). And also.. I really need the writing exercise. Two years not writing anything of true creative prowess has led to my writing atrophying by ... quite a bit I reckon. So now my goal is to write, write every day, maybe not necessarily as well as I would like, but to consistently write. I’m talking both fanfic and original stuff (which I won’t be sharing liberally anymore, sorry, but the scriptwriters and my boyfriend who is a film maker already called first dibs, Haha).

I’m currently really into Fire Emblem Three Houses, so... expect a lot of trollish FE 3 Houses fics from me. Hahaha. Off the top of my head, these are some of the ideas I’m working on for 3houses: 

1/ In which Byleth thinks she is in a shounen genre world, that she is the sexy mentor to the shonen hero that is probably one among her students 

2/ In which it’s a cosmic horror love story (coming very soon)

3/ In which it’s a gamer Byleth fic, except instead of the regular gamer mechanics it’s a smorgasbords of mechanics from FE Awakening, Fates, and 3 Houses 

4/ A pregnant Byleth drama fic (like seriously drama, heartbreak, and more drama, in other words it’s straight up a treat for my sadistic side. Ehehehe!!!)   

And more!!!

[cherrygorilla]

Time for me to be nosy as heck for the fanfic author thing! Hope you don't mind if I ask a lot like you did to me! Here you are: 4, 5, 6, 7, 14, 17, 20, 21, 22, 24, 25, 27, 29, 30, 31, 33, 34, 35, 37, 40 A bunch are the same ones you asked me, but I'm really curious as to what your answers would be. If there's anything you'd like to answer that I didn't ask you, then feel free to add it on if you feel up to it! 💖

Okay, I'm known to ramble at the best of times but I really ran away with myself here. You may want to grab a snack or something first; it's hella long. You've been warned! 

4. What made you start writing fanfiction? 

When I was like 11/12 I was obsessed with the musical Starlight Express and after trying to google just about everything I could about it I think I stumbled across some fanfiction for it. Well, instantly my little english-class-loving brain grabbed this concept and ran with it. I remember writing my own stories in this cheap little notebook I would hide in my bedside table drawer and it was around this time that TBM came out, so naturally I decided to see if that had any fanfiction too. Turns out it did, and significantly more than Starlight Express might I add, so my creativity ran away with itself and next thing I knew I was setting up my own account and getting properly involved this time. And I guess, as they say, the rest is history... 

5. Favourite pairing? 

This is pretty tricky for me. Most of the pairings that I have set up are littered with little flaws and things that make them more interesting to write about (and hopefully read about lol) and more realistic. And the already established pairings that I use (i.e. Mack & Brady in old stories or Lela & Tanner) just feel too bland for me to really connect with them, which is probably why I always struggle so much to write for them. I suppose Lela & Tanner can be cute, or at least their potential is; I don't feel like the movies did them justice lol. But for my stuff, at the moment I just feel so out of practice with writing and at such an early stage in the story with Wheels and Waves that I'm not really attached to any of the pairings yet. And besides, the only one I've really established so far is Butchy & Giggles, but if you've read my last chapter then you'll know that that's not exactly doing so hot atm. So, since I can pick holes and find flaws in everyone's relationships too much to pick a favourite, I think I'll pick one I'm excited about that has some of the biggest flaws imaginable: Coral & Hyde. And that's all I'm going to say. Unless you're curious, then ask away lmao. 

6. Least favourite pairing? 

Okay, I may be a bit controversial here- Actually, this is probably really controversial judging by some of the reviews on my old stories that I was just reading. But I don't really like Mack & Brady… Hear me out! Maybe it's just because I haven't watched the movies for ages and I haven't been thinking about them writing-wise since I abandoned my old stuff but they just seem really bland to me. Don't get me wrong, they're super sweet, but I like giving my characters a bit of grit to work with and make them a little more interesting beneath their 'perfect movie character in an idyllic world' surface and I just could never seem to do that with Mack & Brady. I could never manage to give them any depth and because of that I feel like I just grew to resent them haha. Other people can write for them much better than I can, let's just put it that way. Apart from them though, non-canon-wise in my stories it's got to be Butchy & Coral. Hands down. Honestly, what was I thinking? It was cringey. It was basic. And I think because of it Coral became super one-dimensional and kept losing her way as a character because my whole focus was trying to get them to work as a couple. Spoiler alert: they don't. And since I ditched them I think I was really able to get her to come into her own and develop a much more interesting, albeit worse, side of her.

7. Favourite type of au? 

This is probably going to be a quick one because I don't do a lot of au stuff but modern day/high school aus are always a lot of fun. I feel like TBM2 could have done so much cool stuff with that premise but then they went and dumbed down all the characters and really ruined their chance but I think the concept in general is so cute. I'm actually working on something in this vein for my sims blog, but that's not what we're talking about so let's move on. 

14. Do the people in your life know you write fic? How do they feel about it?

 Nope. I haven't ever mentioned it to my family because I just don't think that they'd 'get' it. I think I mentioned it to one of my best friends ages ago because she also read/casually wrote fanfics but I don't think that she still knows that I've kept it up; she probably just assumes that it was something we both just did when we were 13/14. So they don't really think anything of it; they don't know and probably never will lol. So I just struggle over chapters and ideas and things by myself. 

17. What's the harshest criticism you've ever gotten on a fic? 

To be honest, I don't think that I've ever really had any super harsh criticism. None that I can remember, anyway. I was reading through the reviews on one story recently and someone told me that I should work on my dialogue for Mack & Brady because it wasn't true enough to their characters and tbh they probably weren't wrong. That's barely criticism but it was the closest that I could find to it in my five minutes of looking and nothing else stood out in my memory so I guess that's what I'll go with. I know that probably sounds super cocky like "omg i'm amazing i never get any criticism from anyone because i'm amazingggg!!!1!!" but honestly all the reviews on my old stuff were just people being nice to me because I was friendly to them and I get next to no reviews on my current stuff, so there's no real opportunity for criticism if there's no interaction in the first place lmao. 

20. What's your biggest struggle when it comes to writing fic? 

Actually finding the time to write it when I have uni work, family life, stuff with friends and a somewhat healthy sleep schedule to balance as well. I just don't have enough hours in a day. Besides that, when it actually comes to writing I guess I find it hard to stick solely to ideas that progress the plot. I've been trying to work on that a lot more lately and be more ruthless with my planning but sometimes I just get inspired by something fun and in sheer creative desperation I just wedge it into the plot somewhere. And I think that for the reader's sake I need to stop doing this. 

21. Your biggest strength? 

I don't know if this is what anyone else would consider my biggest strength but I personally really like the way that I can develop the characters beyond what little personality we get to see in the movies. I love working on their story arcs and experimenting with how they 'exist' in my head, like finding out who the quiet souls are, who the loud mouths are and why they act like that. From the snippets we actually see of them in the movies and how basic they are, I'm pretty proud of the characters I've rounded them into in my stories; they feel a lot more real now, to me at least. 

22. Which do you do more: read fic or write fic? 

I know it's hard to believe, but probably write. I only really keep up with a handful of stories now and I always find I'm more actively thinking about kicking my butt into gear and writing something myself instead of setting out to read someone else's stuff. 

24. What's your process? 

Daydream and plan out future plot lines for most of the waking hours of the day. Find the fleeting shred of time available in said day to sit down and work on something if both inspiration and motivation are working in my favour. Actually sit down and open up a google doc, perhaps with a cup of tea if I'm feeling particularly adventurous and fancy treating myself for doing something productive. Painfully struggle through the first ten minutes of warming up my writing muscles and getting my creative juices flowing again. Settle into a good rhythm and just let my fingers and the words work their magic until something boring from the real world interrupts me and drags me away from my fictional one. Then repeat. 

25. Of all the fics you've written, which is your favourite? 

I know it's not necessarily a single fic but I really liked when I was writing the one-shots for Surf, Sun, Sand because I knew that I was writing the things people wanted to read, so I knew there was more of a chance that they'd enjoy them. And it was nice not being constrained to one timeline, I could jump around and play with different pairings, ideas and settings as much as I, well, the requests, wanted. I also really liked my Twelve Days of Cruisin' for a Bruisin' Christmas story, but I can't put that at the top spot because I'm so frustrated that I never got that final chapter up. It was really fun to write though and that's one of the few things that I've written that I'm still happy with to this day lmao. I just think it's sweet and I like how I wrote all the characters, so I'd say that's a win for me. 

27. What's your most popular fic? Do you think the popularity is warranted, or is there another fic that you think deserves it more? 

Statistics-wise it's Paper Flowers, by a long-shot. 77,485 views and 331 reviews. Now, I think that the fact that there are about a million chapters and I wrote it back when the fandom was thriving has quite a lot to do with that, if not all of it, because I'm almost certain that it can't be the writing, character quality or whatever crap I threw into the plot back then. But for nostalgia's sake, I'll allow it. And to be fair, it was probably alright at the time. I do think, however, that I've developed and improved my writing style over the years, so it would be nice if Wheels and Waves could get a little more popularity (since it's something I'm actually semi-proud of lol). But I just don't have the audience, so what can you do? 

29. Which of your fics was the hardest to write? 

Just Like Me. By a country mile. Like I mentioned earlier, I really struggle when it comes to writing for Mack & Brady and although I liked the concept (and a few other people did too) I just wasn't ever happy with what I ended up with. The chapters felt boring (which probably had something to do with the fact that I wrote them in my phone notes at 11:30pm), their relationship felt bland and the plot felt like it was going nowhere. I sort of had a vague structure of where I wanted to take it, but when I couldn't seem to get the hang of writing for them every chapter felt like such a challenge. 

30. Favourite fic writers? 

You, girl! I literally don't even bother to keep up with anyone else anymore because I just don't have the time (uni will do that to a bitch, lol) but I never miss a post of yours and will frequently go and re-read your stuff (especially if it's in preparation for a crossover lmao) if I need a pick-me-up. And like you said, we're practically family now and what kind of internet sister would I be if I didn't support my fam?! 

31. Do you write just for fun, or would you ever consider pursuing writing? 

I don't think I'd ever actually pursue it as a job. I'm in dentistry school atm so I'm pretty set on becoming a dentist, but even if that wasn't the case, I don't think I have the creativity to create my own unique story with original characters and a whole universe under my control. I just think it's fun to expand on other ideas and grow my own ideas from them. 

33. Fanfiction pet peeves? 

Bad grammar is really frustrating. But I also just think it's really boring when people will basically re-write the whole movie/story pretty much word-for-word with only the slightest of alterations. Like, I've already watched/read this once, why would I want to do it again? I came here for creativity and fun stories with my fave characters, not the flat-out plot all over again with a cookie-cutter, paper doll inserted into the mix to steal a few lines. It just bored me. 

34. First person, second person or third person? 

I'd probably put second person last because I just find reader-insert things weird and cringey. Like they legit make me feel uncomfortable sometimes. And then I'd go with first person because although I don't really have a problem with it, it's just never a style I'd choose to write in; I just can't really get the hang of it and I prefer to be able to see and show everyone's perspective on a situation from the outside, which is why good old third person has to be my favourite. 

35. OCs, reader inserts or canon pairings?

 Like I said, reader inserts creep me out a bit so definitely not those. Canon pairings are a pretty safe bet and can be cute most of the time (I just personally seem to struggle with them lol) and if they're done well (i.e. not basic bitches with no personality that just double as weird reader inserts *cough cough* Coral in Paper Flowers smh 12 year old me) then I think OCs can be really fun and can add another layer to fanfics that takes them beyond the bubble of what's canon. 

37. Which character is your favourite to write for? 

Saying Coral would be too easy because she's literally my own character, so of course I'm going to enjoy writing for her. So, other than that I'm going to have to say Seacat. I feel much more comfortable writing for the surfers than the bikers anyway, so that definitely plays into it. But I really like the version of him I've created. I really leaned into his sort of fiesty, stubborn side that occasionally showed itself in the movies, which created a super interesting dynamic with his inherent relaxed nature that all the surfers have. He's a really fun character to work with and I've got lots of fun things planned for him, so I think he's earned that top spot. But I'll mention Giggles too because it's been fun developing her character more deeply for Wheels and Waves. I just like a bit more drama, which Seacat can deliver more than my sweet bby G. 

40. Imagine yourself 10 years in the future, do you still think you'll be writing fic? 

Honestly, who knows? Back when I started I never thought I'd still be writing it at 18, so never say never, I guess. 

And since you said I could choose another one, I'll go for 38. From where do you draw inspiration? 

I wanted to include this one because I'm literally listening to my Wheels and Waves playlist as I write this to try to get me into that #writingmood. A few different things influence me but music has always been my biggest inspiration. I'm constantly adding new songs to my playlist and finding songs I want to use so badly that I'll rearrange and shift around plot points to work them into the story. For example, that Coral & Hyde relationship I mentioned earlier? Grown entirely from songs. But yeah, I'm always getting inspired by songs, which is why I'm really trying to get a general plan of Wheels and Waves set in stone so that I'll stop being tempted to switch things around and ruin the plot with convoluted ideas I get on a whim because I heard a fun song. On another note though, if you have any song suggestions then hit me up lmao; I'm always looking for more haha.

[professorjamie]

( CHRIS PINE + CISMALE ) — Have you seen JAMIE HUNTINGTON ? This THIRTY SIX year old is a PROFESSOR AT NYU / BEST SELLING AUTHOR who resides in MANHATTAN. HE has been living in NYC for TWELVE YEARS, and is known to be CHARMING and SINCERE, but can also be FLIRTATIOUS and IMPULSIVE, if you cross them. People tend to associate them with FOUNTAIN PENS and LUXURY CARS.

OOC; Hey hey hey. Super excited to be writing with you all! Here’s a bit about my bb Jamie, (who may or may not be based off of Jamie in TL5Y... don’t @ me okay.) Please HMU for plots!

Did I just hear an alarm start ringing? Did I see sirens go flying past? Though I don’t know what tomorrow’s bringin’, I’ve got a singular impression things are moving too fast.

Jamie (Jameson, named after the whiskey) Irvine Huntington was born in Los Angeles, California to an accomplished set of parents. His mother and father both worked in film; his mom, an Academy Award winning actress, and his father, who took home an Oscar for Best Direction as well.

The silver spoon was never very far away from his mouth, so as sweet as he is, he’s a bit a lot cocky as well. He’s a bit conceited, but in an earnest way. He’s worked hard for his accomplishments, never wanting to live in his parent’s shadows, and he’s proud of himself for that. He’s a humble bragger, minus the humble part occasionally.

He acted in commercials and his father’s movies as a child, but always found himself curled up and reading scripts or other novels whilst on set and at home. So while he loved being creative, being an actor just wasn’t for him, much to his parent’s chagrin. But they’re loving and supportive, so they were totally fine at the end of the day that he wanted to be a writer.

He enrolled in the prestigious Columbia University in New York for their MFA writing program under a fake last name (Huntington) so he would get in on his own merits, instead of his parent’s fame.

While there in his first year, he met and fell in love with a girl who was also attending the school and entered his first serious relationship as an adult. He had slept around a lot in High School, but felt ready to settle into something more serious and the two moved in together by the end of that year.

I found a woman I love; and I found an agent who loves me.

The next year, Jamie’s manuscript for a class project was picked up by a book publisher and they offered him a six figure deal because they liked the script so much. After a lot of debating and advice from people he trusted, he left Columbia and moved into New York City to be close to his publisher while he finished the book.

And I say well, well, what else is in store? Got all this and more before 24.

It took over a year to complete and publish, but it turned out to be a roaring success and was quickly added to Oprah Winfrey Book Club list as well as a New York Times best seller. He also married his then-girlfriend-now-wife and she continued education in the city after they moved to the heart of Manhattan. 

But the view from the top wasn’t all good, his wife soon became jealous by his success and after a few years of trying to make their marriage work, they got a bitter divorce.

The break up fuelled his creative passions and helped him start writing his second New York Times best selling book... but it also caused a lot of inner turmoil and caused him to party excessively, his brain always making rash decisions and not thinking about the consequences.

My ego's swollen; I just keep rollin' along.

After the release of his second book, he evened out a bit, and started being more rational. It was around his 27th birthday when he met his next serious girlfriend after his divorce. They clicked immediately and rushed to live together, for they both thought they found ‘the one’ in each other. They got married only two years into their relationship.

It's hard not to be sure I'm spinning out of control.

However, this relationship also ended up having its own share of problems after the ‘honeymoon’ phase was over. It led to infidelity, lies, and heartache for both of them. Three years after they got married and after multiple cheating scandals, they got divorced.

This led to another book which, spoiler alert: was another hit. This time he was more level headed about the break up and didn’t spiral as much as the last time, but he still wasn’t making amazing choices.

I'm feeling panicked and rushed and hurried; I'm feeling outmaneuvered and outclassed.

He did what he could to fill the void in his heart, focusing on his friends, family, and writing- but women are his kryptonite. He’s been casually seeing dozens of women since this point but the once ever hopeless romantic now isn’t quite so sure that love is out there. But... part of him still wants to believe.

His mom got him a puppy a few years ago to help get over some of the sadness of his relationships and Jamie fell in love immediately, focusing his time on taking care of his dog and in return, taking care of himself, too.

He’s in a good place now, teaching Creative Writing & English at NYU, which he finds ironic since he technically didn’t graduate. (Let’s just pretend this is allowed haha, he’s got a degree from Oprah’s book club~)

He loves inspiring students and the next generation of writers, though his own career has taken a bit of a backseat to his new found teaching passion. Though, if the muse strikes, maybe he has another best seller on his hands.

But I'm so happy I can't get worried about this singular impression.

He lives in a fancy penthouse in downtown Manhattan, has expensive taste, and frequents expensive restaurants, Broadway shows, and other artistic endeavours to keep his creative juices flowing. He loves meeting new people, travelling, and is growing every day. He’s not sure where the future will take him, but he’s just glad to be along for the ride.

I've got a singular impression things are moving too fast.

Positive traits: Charming, genuine, optimistic, kind Negative traits: Flirtatious, impulsive, cocky, guarded

[flyingthehedge]

Reader Request: Womanhood Initiation Ritual

Earlier this week I asked my readers what they wanted me to write about. I have some of my usual posts lined up for later in the month, but wanted to know what you witches really wanted from me. I got answers and ideas across the board, and promise I will cover as many of them as I possibly can. Some may take a little longer to answer, like the person waiting since January for me to post about office magic, but I promise, I am getting there. Haha!

So the first post I want to cover because it seems the most time-sensitive comes from a reader via Facebook: "Humm.. what am I about to pick up I need help with... initiation rituals. I need something for a serious, not tv stupid menarche party for my Tinkerbutton. I've got her fabric pads. I've got her a tree of life necklace, we've had loads of talks! Now I'm just waiting for aunt flow to show! Lol"

What a wonderful suggestion! After doing a bit of research, and I mean deep digging research, there isn't a whole lot available for women regarding initiation rituals. The whole "Period Party" is as close to modern initiation into womanhood as we currently get, and it's pretty exclusionary as not all women have periods! Because of this, I wanted to write an initiation ritual that all women could use, whether it be when they start their period, when they turn 16, have their first baby, or transition. I didn't want to leave anyone out. Simone de Beauvoir said in best in The Second Sex, "One is not born, but rather becomes, a woman."

This particular ritual is best performed on the Full Moon when the Divine Feminine is strongest, but any important day will work as your Divine Feminine is strongest within yourself. So if your period begins in the middle of the Waxing Moon, go with it. Your official transition date is the New Moon? Do it! Pick a day that works best for you.

What You'll Need

white veil or shroud

table to sit objects on

red candle

lighter/matches

a bowl of purified water with a pinch of salt

red apple

knife/athame

a chalice of red wine or juice

What to Do

This ritual is best completed with at least 2 people but can be modified to do alone, on the Full Moon or any other special occasion. Begin by cleansing, charging, and/or blessing your items. Whatever method you chose is up to you. Personally, my go-to is always sage, because I have a ton of it. I also really enjoy blowing on an object and imagining all the residual energy blowing away with it. Prior to the ritual whoever is being initiated should take a purifying bath or shower. Once cleansed, they should either dress in all white or wear at least a white veil or shroud for the beginning of the ritual.

When ready, lay out the objects on the table with the candle at the top center, the bowl of water to the left, the chalice of red wine/juice to the right, and the apple in front of the candle. Then create sacred space in whatever way you wish. Feel free to cast a circle and call quarters, but do not invoke any deities at this stage. Skip that step for now. Once sacred space has been established light the red candle and invoke the goddess Artemis by saying,

"With this red candle, I ask Artemis, Goddess of Sovereignty and Young Women, to join our ritual to bless this young woman as she transitions into womanhood of her own volition. May you watch over us all and bring strength and courage as we march forward into the future."

This can be said by the initiator if working with more than one person or by the initiate if alone. Next, bless the water. The initiator should hold their hands over the bowl and say,

"I bless this water in the name of Artemis, Divine Huntress and Protector of Young Women. May it be cleansed and purified in Her name."

Dip 2 fingers into the blessed water and place your fingers on the initiate's forehead. The veil or shroud should still be covering their face at this time. Say,

"With this water, I cleanse and purify [insert name here] before me. May she be blessed by Artemis as she transitions from a child into womanhood."

Next, have the initiate pick up the knife and apple. Then the initiator says,

"The blade symbolizes the last roadblock between [insert name] and womanhood. The apple represents the Divine Feminine, the Forbidden Fruit, the life-giving gift of women. By cutting through the apple, [insert name] will make the final transition into womanhood."

The initiate should then cut the apple in half while saying,

"I break the chains of childhood and recognize that now I am a woman. I accept my Divine Feminine and vow to honor her daily. I will allow no one, including myself, to devalue me. I will stand tall as I walk this path and ask that Artemis continue to bless me in the future."

Lift the veil and allow the initiate to take a bite from one half of the apple. The other half should be given to Artemis as an offering. Next, the initiator should dip 2 fingers into the red wine and place them on the initiates forehead, now uncovered, and say,

"With this red wine, I anoint [insert name] with the life-giving gift of women. May it spark creativity, strength, and perseverance."

Finally, snuff out the candle and say,

"We thank you, Artemis, for your grace and protection during this initiation ritual for [insert name]."

Remove the sacred space and go party! This is a time to celebrate!

Why You Did It

For this spell, I drew heavily on mythological representations of women from the red candle to the red apple to the chalice of red wine/juice. Let's begin with the veil. Veils are commonly used to represent a transition from one life to another. During a wedding ceremony, the white veil represents purity prior to the transition into marriage. In the case of this ritual, it means the same thing, but not in a patriarchal sense. Children, by definition, are pure beings. The veil represents that purity, not that it suddenly goes away when one becomes a woman, but instead, it changes form, which is represented by the lifting of the veil. The lifting symbolizes the transition from childhood to womanhood.

Next, we have the red candle. Candles, in general, attract spirits and deities which is why there is a candle in the first place. It's red to symbolize blood or menstruation. I mentioned in the introduction, however, that just because a woman doesn't menstruate, it doesn't mean she is less of a woman. The candle allows us to symbolically represent blood and menstruation, the life-giver of all animals, even if the soon-to-be-woman is not menstruating or cannot menstruate.

If you have been following my blog for any period of time, you know that I don't believe in any deities, but I felt compelled to include Artemis into this ritual based on her mythology alone. One of the most famous initiation rituals for young women involved the Cult of Artemis at Bruaron. Furthermore, Artemis is said to rule over all biological transitions of women, from before puberty to the first childbirth, which makes her the perfect goddess to invoke when we are talking about initiation into womanhood.

Next, we have the blessed water, later followed by the red wine/juice. The blessed water acts as a final purifier before the transition into womanhood. At the same time, it blesses the soon-to-be-woman with the blessing of Artemis. The now woman is finally touched with the red wine/juice, which also symbolizes menstruation and the life-giving properties of blood. This is the finally blessing of Artemis and is meant to infuse the now woman with a "woman's life force." Women, by nature, have the ability to bring forth life, but that doesn't always mean bringing about a child. It also means creating artwork, poetry, businesses, and the like. Basically, anything that involves the act of creating. The water and red wine/juice are presented in a bowl and chalice respectively, again symbolizing the "womb" or life-giver, even if you don't physically have one, you still have a location for creation. Both of these were touched to the forehead or third-eye to awake the innate Divine Feminine all women possess.

And finally, we have the red apple, the ultimate symbol of womanhood in my opinion. Again, the red symbolizes blood and the shape of an apple conveys the womb, but it is the Biblical tale of the apple that resonates with me. I don't care what your current beliefs are, the story of Eve plucking an apple from the Tree of Knowledge is known around the world, and still holds sway within the witch community. Eve taking a bite of that apple was the ultimate act of rebellion; it was her initiation into womanhood, despite the Bible framing it as a sinful act that led to the downfall of man. Screw that! It was a woman taking possession of her Divine Feminine. The act of slicing and biting into the apple recreates this act of rebellion, solidifying the transition into womanhood. I knew the moment I was asked to write a womanhood initiation that I had to include the famous apple as the final act. There was no avoiding it.

Unfortunately, this is not a spell you break. However, you can choose to no longer recognize the initiation. Simply light a black candle, thank Artemis for her grace, and let her know you no longer wish to recognize the initiation. Make sure you leave Artemis an offering when finished. And, as always, remember to record your spell in your Book of Shadows or use my spell/ritual worksheet to keep track of the spell.

Have you been initiated into something before? How about womanhood? Share your stories in the comments below, and if you tried this ritual yourself, I would love to hear how it went!

[promisenolies]

1 & 11❣️😊

1.       What made you start writing fanfic? Oh goodness, I’ve been writing fanfic for...about 20 years (haha, oh shit, I just aged myself didn’t I?),it’s actually a bit difficult to remember what exactly made me start. ...Nah,that’s probably not true. I started fanfic with Hanson. They were a welcomedistraction from my life at that point--a really rough point in my life. Mystories were a safe way for me to explore ways life might look different forme. I’d always been driven to write stories, using a fandom is an incrediblyfun way to explore the stories in my head. I took a lot of time off fromwriting, but within the last... five years or so I found it again. I feel thatmy partner helped with that a lot actually, encouraging me to live my life mostpassionately - which included writing. Fanfic was a jumping off point for me toexplore writing more generally. I even ventured into querying agents forrepresentation after completing my first novel. When that went too slowly, andI got too many, quite polite, rejections I self-published… which was prettycool. But there’s a draw and a love associated with fanfic that I don’t get in “traditional”writing. I still have interest from Carina Press, so who knows maybe I’ll writesome smutty goodness with original characters for them someday.

It had only been Hanson fanfic(hanfic) until just a few months ago when the beautiful men of BTS got my “creativejuices” flowing hahaha! I love writing them so much, it’s probably unhealthy. Ialso read so much it’s unhealthy as well. Honestly, it’s most detrimental to theconfidence in my own writing, but what do you do?

11.       What kind of relationships are you mostinterested in writing?

This question has essentially stumped me. Ihave written romance with social issue undertones (my novel deals with sexualviolence, intimate partner violence, healing, boundaries, friendship etc), I’vewritten light BDSM stories, I’ve done short stories that highlight the sexualaspects of relationships (aka nothing but smut)… I know that my one absolutelyconsistent aspect is consent. I’m a stickler for consent in any story that hassexual aspects. (See my rant post HERE for further discussion)

As for our BTS fandom, I can say that withany topic/focus I’m a sucker for Jimin/Jungkook pairings.

[optimist-avenue]

I may not know a lot about drawing/painting/just art in general (haha jokes, I know next to nothing about all of these, except for writing...) but guys, it's art and should be appreciated along with the person who created it. The things that people make into art is so beautiful, and watching them bring that art to life is amazing! For example, I saw a Tik Tok of someone making art out of their fingerprints the other day! FINGERPRINTS!

I'm getting distracted...listen, darlings, what I'm trying to say is dont stop creating. Keep coming up with your ideas and put them into motion. It's a show of your creativity, and let me tell you, people love to see stuff like that. I swear they do!

Lesson of today? Don't procrastinate. Get those creative juices flowing and share your masterpieces with the world because we can't wait to see what you have in store for us.