#you should be nice to people regardless of physical traits but like

[girlboyburger]

you're nice to people who are bald or balding, right? you're nice to people with high hairlines? or weird hair growth? right? you don't make mean jokes about going bald at the expense of people who are going through the very scary and usually very isolating process of losing hair?? right???

[zzencat]

Their Sexual Tendencies + Traits? (NSFW) - Timeless ⏳

Simply choose from left to right.

(Minors DNI) Nice and simple. What would happen if you got involved? Their tendencies in bed? Intimate behavior? Maybe it’s the one you’ve been ignoring. How about the one you’re with? A future partner? What goes on in their head at night when you’re all they can think about? And if more unfolds? Very TMI. Includes sexual, graphic descriptions and toxic traits.

Must do before you choose: Clear your mind. Time is now patient and still. Close your eyes, inhale deeply, fill your chest up to the fullest, feel the soft air brush up against the ridges of your nose. Breathe out. You may now begin.

—————————-

Pile 1. “I was a bad girl. I did some bad things.” - Jojo Siwa (lmfaooo)

•right of the bat, “karma” from Jojo siwa played

•I get brat vibes from this pile…are you a brat? lmfao cuz your person’s gonna like that for sure

•or maybe you try to hard to be a brat or appear/act like one? Your person loves it regardless

•this person loves dominating, but they can get just as enthusiastic as a sub. The instant switch and role change is actually pretty impressive, since they do it effortlessly

• I get the vibe they do or will do most of the topping work tho. They can have their lazy days, sure, but they like moving

•dare I say this person is the kinkiest out of the three piles

•^^ we’re talking bondage, role play, slapping(? Damn), everything and all over the above—receiving or giving, they can do it all. Fast raw sex and quickies are hot to them esp

• if you’re poly, this person is okay with that. If you’re not, they’re also okay. they just wanna have sex, end of story 🧌

• is down to literally do it anywhere and everywhere

• if this relationship started off as some kind of fwb or anything with benefits, I wouldn’t be surprised

• if you guys are both in a committed relationship, make sure you try to match their energy in bringing new things to the bedroom

• these people are shower masturbators—the sex drive is actually crazy like- slow your horse for just a second damn

•^^ they don’t even have time to masturbate if you’re with each other all the time. I got the image of a couple going on a trip and they’re in a hotel…yk what comes next. If you live together, cue some jungkook music. There’s no makin it out

• if you’re not together due to long distance stuff, a lot of cam/phone sex. It happens so much that you think they’re jobless (and they could be tbh. Tell em to get a job!!!)

• this person gives me the vibe that they’re not really in an occupation that demands much. It feels like a very lax, low demand and energy job OR they’re a model for something and they make money through content like that

• this person is reallllly good looking tho. It’s how they can get away with a lot of things

• their maturity level is kinda questionable I wont lie…I think you need to teach them some boundaries

• they could take a while to see their faults? Maybe they don’t wanna see or they’re too oooh la la in the sky

• can come off as quite careless. Can even be clingy

• also very prone to peer pressure or self-sabotaging behavior

•avoids conflict like the plague

• open to all body types as long as your face is cute. I think they likely prefer people who don’t look like they’re freaks in the sheets ykwim? The duality is prob what gets em going. But then again, I think anything gets them going. This person is a true horndog of nature

• (I, personally, as Teddy, the reader, feel like I should include why they’re like this—craving physical intimacy so much, but there’s this brushing off/dismissive energy like “forget it they don’t need to know- let’s just have fun and shiii”)

•^^ (if I rephrase what I wanted to include, it might be better. They prob grew up with a lot of siblings/other kids, and not enough love to go around, so they were overlooked, OR no-to-low amount of siblings but not enough physical and emotional intimacy and connection from parents/guardians, so they looked towards external sources.)

• doesn’t have too many expectations tbh (idk if that’s a bad or a good thing, but the root of it is that they don’t wanna pressure people to stay with them or force people into commitment)

• ^^if they fall in love with you and yall date, and you leave one day, it’ll hurt so much that they’ll revert back to the thinking of why commitment didn’t always work for them

•childhood couldn’t show them what true commitment was so if you actually express that you want to be with them exclusively, they’ll be so shocked, to say the least. Like “me? Why me? I’m not anything special, lmfao” . They’re laughing it off and will feel nervous so they’ll cover it up by drinking smth (water or anything), but they’re so used to the sentiment of being “nothing special” that they’re numb to it

• ^^ but if they end up falling in love with you (beware of their nonstop horse sex drive), they’ll be a lot more reserved and laid back than before

• they’ll prob be lazier tho ngl. They’ll take days off work just to have sex with you all day

• they make up for this uselessness feeling through sexual activities

• they think like “why touch yourself alone when I’m right here?”

• when they do masturbate tho, they think about you and your body shifting back and forth against the bed. They’re pretty quick tho when it comes to masturbation—I’m guessing bc of impatience and not being able to hold back. They only last long when it comes to sex with a partner

• the body worship is real nice

• most of the sexual activities have one thing in common though, and that’s the closeness of both of your skins. This person kisses your skin so much during sex, and really anytime, feel you up whenever they can. The touchiness is all the time and it’s sweet, but it can always lead to something else

• in this pile, lies a very rare breed. a handful, and really not a lot, will encounter the rare breed partner that also has this high of a sex drive, is confident, has a regular day job, prob tall and slim, is responsible and committed only to you, and will be on board 100% if you ever want to engage in exhibitionist/voyeur activities—extreme (like streaming your intimate moments or camming together)

——————————————————-

Pile 2. *Growling noises.*

• the thing is…you’re just existing 😭

• you don’t do much to piss this person off (most of the time). Some light jokes and messing around here and there but you’re pretty much chillin. (ESPECIALLY when you’re not dating, this bullet point and the previous be the vibe.)

• this person wants you like a predator wants prey, basically. It feels weird to say it ngl, but it’s a very obviously fire energy? Like Leo smth…or a very capable and sadistic Scorpio? They have this dark and mysterious look. Very intimidating, but you prob don’t give this person your time of day—either you don’t care, think it’s weird, or maybe you’re just playing a little hard to get

•^^whatever this person thinks you’re doing, purposely or not, they find it intriguing and you have to be theirs

• this person tho? pile 1 has nothing on this person. My bad, not person—beast.

• very dominant person and very much shows it if you’re exclusively dating each other or in a higher relationship

• they could use some work on their control issues tho. IMPORTANT!!!: this person would NEVER put their hands on you to hurt you out of anger or violent means. No abuse in their household, no, no. (In bed, it’s different but only if you consent)

•^^ regarding the control issues, make sure they’re not obsessed with you bc you’re hard to control. At your highest energy, this pile has a very independent, do-what-I-want energy. You don’t give two shits abt what others think- you dress, look, and act the way you want. You stand up to them when no one has the balls to do it

• very much BDSM. It could get a little tiring—not the person!! The person has hella games and tricks up their sleeve when it comes to bdsm and freaky shit. Tiring in the sense that it just stays in the BDSM realm like dude…break out of it cmon. It’s time to experiment with different menus, not recipes.

• commander type. also choking. this person likes choking. Choking you AND being choked, but they wouldn’t bring up the latter if you never mention it.

• has a LOT of self control…until they don’t. But I think this person loses it very easily bc of their partner—like you needa be punished asap type feel.

• getting off is normal for them, but when they have a partner, most of the time they save it until sex. but if not and you’re not around, they’re gonna go at it, thinking how you should be there, imagining how good you look with your mouth on their parts while you look up at them, praising you about how good you’re doing.

• this person isn’t really simple with masturbation either. If they simply lay down and or sit on their bed and touch themselves, it wouldn’t be as satisfying so they have to go again, preferably touching themselves in a different place—depends on what mood they’re in, they’ll choose a risky, likely-to-get-caught kinda place or a place outside their room, but private.

• wow, verrrry possessive person. Marking you up 😫 In the morning, if you need to go somewhere, they’ll be like “Don’t try to cover it up.”

• This person could be some sort of player? Regardless of who they are, they just have a lot of pent up energy they need to get out of. They def have experience

•honestly, pile 2, this person can get really damn intense. If you can’t handle their heat, it’s okay to get outta the kitchen cuz they’re the ones turning it up and have also broken the ac 😭 the sex is crazy good, but it will take this person a bit of time to actually fall in love with you. Cuz you’re so different from everyone they’ve seen so they’re unsure…weirded out…interested.

• if you somehow get in bed with this person, you’re in for a ride (literally.) after this experience, this person will deadass replay it everywhere, every day, all the time. It becomes an obsession with them (which may or may not be a good thing for you.)

• this person is going to be in your life for a whiiiiile. You might even roll your eyes and be like “whyyy”

• this is the most obvious enemies to lovers trope pile, but it starts smth like that OR you just get annoyed that everyone wants this person and to you, they’re just hot and nothing much.

• it gets wilder— this person WILL try to make you jealous. Shamelessly. (Ick)

• they’d like to receive some mouth-work from you if ya get my vibe. (Which is unfair bc they’re kinda selfish when it comes to receiving pleasure.) if they give it, they give it THEIR way

• ^ you have to put them in their place and show them you’re not someone to be fucked with. The worst thing you could do is leave their life entirely. Even pissing you off gives them something.

• if you’re sick of their shit, they might even let you have a chance of taking it out on them and having your way for once (BUT just so you know, if you do, they’ll take it as you surrendering to them. Like you finally have a weakness or manipulation point.)

• HOWEVER, this person, although very fucking stubborn, is willing to make any and all changes for you. IT WILL TAKE TIME. And only if you’re in love with each other. Maybe they were trying to find someone that was worth their time and more than just looks.

• I will say tho, if you get into an actual committed relationship with this person, the upbringing of this relationship looks pretty toxic. Like the crazy need for control and the unwarranted possessiveness (on their side), especially at points when you’re not dating each other. If you don’t set their shit straight, you’ll fall into the trap and could get a broken heart out of it

• ^^ on the bright side, this encounter/relationship with them will bring you so much personal growth. If you make it out of this relationship in one piece, you’re actually indestructible. And if they’re really willing to change—I suggest noting down their BIG, grandiose sacrifices for you that puts them at some risk—then there’s also a big chance you could have a harmonious and balanced connection

• ^^ why? Bc they know that you’re not superficial and you have substance to you, and they want that. Be wary tho, this person isn’t stupid and knows what strings to pull

• this person could have a tan tint to their skin or brown hair

————————————————————

Pile 3. “Please let me in...”

• this pile’s energy seems a little closed off. not from your person but from you. I’m feeling indifference, constant wariness, but regardless, there’s always a wall

• you’re prob an introvert and has gotten hurt in the past really, REALLY badly, so you’ve been closing your heart off. There’s a piece of you that still wants to find love, hence your presence here, but you act like you don’t or you don’t show that you are interested in wanting it.

• if you’re an extrovert, however? You may not be TOO keen on sharing things about your life. Open to it, sure…but still somewhat selective

• you would sacrifice everything for the person you love, not that you would willingly admit this verbally. If you have, good for you!! You’re the muse baby

• your person is more likely an extrovert and has tried or IS planning to try to get closer to you/get to know you more. They KNOW you are more than what you show on the surface. They’re the only ones who can see the gems behind the rockiness you show

• they’re a virgin or inexperienced

•^^ I don’t think most of the people who chose this pile mind too much, honestly. There’s a bit of a corruption kink rearing its head in here…not super apparent but it be lurkin in da shadows

• oh they’re a switch hahaha. You can just push em on the bed and they’ll let you do whatever you want to them. They’re not complaining at all tho—just lock in on your target and DESTROYYYY 😈😈

• almost a puppy like energy to them—ALMOST. Almost. Bc they have leader vibes but a nice leader. Maybe not respectable by all…but most. Like one who seeks the best for the team but bc they’re not “alpha” or aggressive enough, it can be tough to get people to take things seriously. But eventually people do. Maybe even out of pity.

• I get the feeling this person had to be very in tune with their parents’/guardians’ feelings (I’m getting anxiety or just freaking out over messes and stuff) — maybe they’ve also grown with grandparents? Or have had the presence of their grandparents be very significant in their lives?

•^ bc of this they will most likely be vanilla in bed. I don’t even think they’ll lust after you for a while man I mean, outta respect yk? And also bc it doesn’t feel right to them. It’s not the first thing or one of the first things that come into their mind when they think about you

• ^^ you basically have to tell them what to do, what they can and cannot do too. They’ve had to be so involved in taking care of everybody with an undying kindness to them that they don’t really know where boundaries begin. They’d never wanna break your boundaries

• ok this does not mean that your person is a nice white male, btw!! I keep seeing a salesman, wearing a baby blue button up and khakis, brown hair…this person seems so average? — this could mean that they’re doing everything they can to make others happy and totally not paying attention to their own. I’m not sure if you’ll ever see this person cry in public, but if you make them cry in bed? Hey, go for it muahahah

• it will prob take a while to get them to be comfortable with thinking about you sexually. If they have to relieve themselves, they try to channel this energy into workouts or something physical that gets their mind off of you in that way. Inevitably, the idea of you in bed will pop up, but they’ll shake it off. It’s not even holding back—they just don’t wanna “disrespect” you and see you as an object (but like I said, if you want them to treat you like one in bed or smth, you have to let them know and say it with a lot of conviction. This person is very mentally bullheaded so it’s hard to break into them like that)

•I think they let a lot of things happen bc they’re that empathetic, or they just don’t have the energy for the chase. Like think little kid stealing from a shop, they’ll prob be like “hey kid- ah…” *sighs and scratches back of head as they watch the kid run away with said items*

• if you’re not interested in this person or blatantly ignoring them, they’ll really try to get you (but in a nonstalker-ish way) which is good!! They just want your attention really. They’re pretty much awestruck by you, ESPECIALLY if you ever go to an event and they see you all cleaned up and dressed, they’ll check you out and zone out mid convo I swear. You actually render them speechless.

• (now…we get to some of the graphics.) This person is not a serial masturbator, I will say. Once a day, max. If you’ll allow them, they would do more. They could honestly go all day if you made them. If this person works in an office and you make them soooooo desperate, they would hide somewhere, perhaps an empty room and just start finding heaven. Very quickly too. Quickly and (trying to be) quiet. They’re pretty on top of things and responsible, but if you just tell em what to do, it will be done. They even clean after their mess too (if they do it in public? Cleaning up fast due to freaking out). Like “oh god, what have I done…” They’re super fucking clumsy too and don’t have too good of a recovery in public tho. For example, if they run into someone they know, RIGHT after coming out of the restroom? Red, hot face, sweat all over their neck. Stuttering and shit when they try to say hi to the said acquaintance. When they touch themselves, they don’t use toys (which is very sad. You gotta spice up their lives. They’re open to it. If you’re not the one with spice, they’re also okay with it. And if you’re both okay with vanilla sex every time, feel free!) This person just uses their hands, but LIES DOWN. They like to relax, face the ceiling, close their eyes, and think slow vanilla things…

•might be tmi, but when they touch themselves, it’s kind of inhibited…and not as fast as people do when they’re abt to cross the finish line, yk? Like either long edging sessions or never letting themselves climax sometimes, or rubbing/pressing very hard and still but not fast(?) when they cum…if you know what I mean? Idk if they’re doing it on purpose or if they’re not too experienced, or if they think they don’t deserve it? Scared maybe?

•no kidding, you could actually do anything to this person. cnc/dubious consent would be hot for them—though, they prob wouldn’t know what the kink is called lolll (you have to make sure tho. Establish boundaries and a safe word) bc they wanna be like “nooooo, don’t do that~~” while you’re all over them. BEFORE or IF you guys ever step into that stage tho, they’ll think about simple things if you do allow them to think about you sexually. Like you on top of them, slow grinding, soft touches, helping them out, mutual masturbation. there’s a little part that is innocent and doesn’t know how to step out of that or where to start when it comes to the more kinky stuff.

• it’s funny bc even tho this person has had a lot of experience outside, within a team or jobs, or clubs, etc., they’re so…malleable?? LMFAO 😂 crazy ass word to use but YES. you can throw them around like a damn doll and have them do this and that. A bit of hesitancy, but they know their main purpose in life is to serve :)

• but like I said, they’re a switch, so not only can they think abt you taking control (softdom energy), but if they think abt being on top, they think about slow, loving sex yk? Like slow grinding- oooh, yeah. that really gets them. They’re the type to milk themselves till the last drop too btw. Til. The. Last. Drop.

• also, most of the partners are not a loud moaner. They’re quiet, likely bc they’ve had to force themselves to be quiet in the household they’ve grown in. If your person is a loud moaner, they’ve grown unashamed of their sexual needs and have developed a healthy relationship with that aspect. If you’re with a person who’s like this and moans loud, congratulations!! They have become comfortable in their skin and you have made it so 🙂‍↕️👏👏 If they’re still quiet, def some insecurity bc of growing up with limiting beliefs or having to live with a lot of people in childhood. If you want them loud, you have to encourage it out of them. They’ll be pretty fuckin shy about it though. You realllly have to pull it out of them.

• bonus: if they’re loud, they’re a slut 😂😂 like a secret slut, yk? (this might be a bit darker so don’t read if you don’t want to—this really only applies to a small portion of people here—but chances are they get off…on being ashamed and self-degradation? A big example is being ashamed for engaging in sex/sexual activities? Like a masochist, “this is so dirty, I shouldn’t be doing this…” but proceeds to do it anyway bc they can’t help themselves?? And they likely degrade themselves while getting off. These people may secretly be content creators for this type of thing but appear angelic in real life OR they have potential to. Like them faceless whimper creators lmfaoo. Listen, hey…if you get with one of these people, you a winner winner chicken dinner

•there’s a big chance most people in this pile or the pile’s person feels ashamed or very guilty about the whole sex thing and masturbation; if you’re looking to improve your relationship with sex or relationship with this person, you have to help each other overcome this fear. It doesn’t matter who asserts themselves to the task. It requires the both of you at the end of the day. And boyyy is it gonna be hard- (…anxiety makes it hard for you to get aroused/stay aroused/reach orgasm tho 😮‍💨 the more you know…). No man, it’s gonna be so awkward—palms-sweatingly awkward. Breaking news, you might have to be the assertive one here. Your impatience could get the best of you and in that case, you’ll guide them. There are so many things that could go wrong in this situation of awkward pre-sex, but if this person has shown their worth to you and you actually trust them, a lot of it is salvageable by your own hand.

• however, if this situation goes south (and not the south we want…) then, this person will start to feel bad or insecure that they’ve hurt or done something wrong towards you, even though they’re a clumsy dummy who doesn’t intend to hurt people and tries hard to do everything right

• ^^ should you ever try to initiate it and try to sex em up again, you’d have to put a bit of work in to convince them, bc they were really open that one time and it was honestly…kinda the first time they’ve gotten so close to doing something THAT vulnerable and revealing. It would feel like they stripped and you didn’t like what you saw, and it was so apparent on your face that it broke them. That kind of vibe. A very sensitive person at heart.

• they get really anxious if something goes wrong. It’s probably a trait they picked up from parents/guardians being like that.

• they have SOOO much potential, seriously. But a lot of what-ifs on their mind so they’re playing it safe. Be confident, and maybe even borderline bossy, with them and gradually they’ll open out of their shell. This person is like hot liquid gold, waiting to be molded into your likings 😇

———————————

**Teddy Note: Hi guys!! This is a super long post, but I hope you’ve gotten something out of it. My sexual tarot deck just came in and I’m pretty much obsessed with it already hahaha. Thank you for reading today’s post!! If you haven’t heard, I’d just opened up paid readings, and there is a sexual reading in there that is pretty much like this one, but more individualized towards you and pretty detailed (if you do decide to purchase, that is.) That’s all I gotta say. It’s been pretty intense doing these readings and the partners in these piles are all wildin in their own way 😅 Thank you again! Take what resonates and leave what doesn’t! Peace outtt :))

[actionmemeplay]

AMP-GUIDES: GETTING STARTED WITH RPing OCs IN THE RPC

Pointers for new or first-time OC players looking to get the ball rolling with writing original characters on Tumblr.

► First off: why make a post like this?

...Because original characters in the RPC (particularly ones who AREN'T fandom OCs, who instead belong to their own original universe) don't have the starting boost of having an existing fandom behind them. They don't set out already recognisable to other players, so it can sometimes be a little tougher to drum up engagement.

► Tip #1: Make your OC easy to know

Two things to keep in mind when trying to get an OC blog out there: 1: nobody knows your character except you. Ergo, 2: ...it's your number one objective to make your OC knowable and interesting to your hopefully-future-RP partners! People visiting your blog should have a way to quickly find out the basics of your character and what makes them tick. Keep in mind that having too much information can sometimes be as big of a roadblock to interaction as not having enough. Long bios documenting your OC's entire life-story can be useful to have around, but may be better to have in addition to a shorter and more succinct bio that neatly introduces the core concept of your muse. When you go hunting for a new book at the library or bookshop, do you dive into every book you pick up straight from page 1? Or do you check out the blurb first, to see if the plot even sounds interesting to you? Your muse doesn't need fancy powers or tragic backstory to be interesting, but regardless of if your OC is the plainest everyman or a secret superhero, you still have to let us see what makes it worth getting to know them. Make sure your pages contain the most basic of basics, such as name, gender (or just pronouns), age, and basic physical details, as well as where your muse comes from/what their world is like, a cursory introduction to their personality, and what they're up to at this point in their life. Establishing a setting and any goals can offer hooks for interactions with other muses. Other things that can be helpful are rundowns of their likes and dislikes, their positive/negative/neutral traits, and information on their strengths or weaknesses, or even the places you'd be most likely to find them.

► Tip #2: Consider visuals

Faceclaims, icons, and fancy graphics are NOT mandatory to finding your OC's niche and having a good time in the tumblr RPC...but they can be nice to have around, and some players feel they can connect easier to OCs when they have a visual aid to help visualise your character. Even if you don't plan on using icons, having just one good quality image for your OC's bio can go a long way. But again: it's optional, so don't sweat it too much.

► Tip #3: Shop around for fandoms with themes or settings similar to your OC's

Is your OC is from a fantasy background? Sci-fi? From a version of our own world? When you're getting started trying to find writing partners, you may find you're most likely to be successful reaching out to muses from canons that fit together well with what you're going for with your own OC. This doesn't mean you can't also shoot for cross-genre interactions, of course, but seeking out muses from fictional worlds similar to your own can be a good place to start.

► Tip #4: Showcase your OC in action

Even if you're not writing threads just yet, in-character posts, open starters or short drabbles can all be a good indicator for newcomers of how your character interacts with others and with the world. Remember: nobody knows your character yet, so something that gives others a hint of your character's vibe can be useful for sparking interest in them. Writing short headcanon posts can be used to the same effect, as they can be a helpful and fun way to both flesh our who your muse is as a person, and to introduce tidbits about your character that don't necessarily come up in a bio section...which can offer more interesting lore about your muse and help other players identify things your characters might either bond or bicker over.

► Tip #5: Don't forget about your fellow OCs

Don't be a stranger! If you know what a slog it can be to build traction for an OC blog then it makes sense to extend a little energy to your fellow OCs in the community. Take the time to check over other OC players' blogs, see if you might find their character interesting, or maybe even take a chance if you're on the fence...you can always unfollow later if you decide your play styles or your muses don't gel.

► Tip #6: Don't get discouraged

OCs can have a harder time in fandom heavy RPCs. It's just a natural expectation of not having the "brand recognition" and pre-existing affection that canon muses frequently do. Some OCs have an easier time taking off than others, but don't give up if yours comes up on a slow start. If you're passionate about your muse and are willing to be a little patient, you'll find your crowd! If you ARE struggling to find people to write with, maybe shop around different promo tags and fandoms, and audit your OC's pages again to make sure that there's enough to draw folks in and that you're selling what makes them unique and engaging. OCs can sometimes take a little more work than canon muses to get out there, but don't listen to anyone who tells you the RPC doesn't like OCs or that they can't be really successful out here. It's true that writing an OC often necessitates being the one to reach out first, but it's a rewarding experience, and you'll be surprised how many people will be enthusiastic to get to know your muse and will grow to love them in time.

[gwydion-aacblog]

it's not the same thing and I apologize if this comes off as talking over you, but i experience a similar thing with my physical disabilities- they make me physically weak in many ways.

oftentimes people will go against me saying that by saying im strong "in my own way"- and no, im not strong, that's the whole point. i shouldn't need to be strong to be valued! nobody needs to be smart or strong or anything to be valued, and these weird, ultimately backhanded compliments hurt way more than they help.

not talk over . :) know is common experience when people can easy see disabled , that sometimes try rush to compliment or infantise . true with mobility aids , visible differences , with intellectual disability .

not that always people try be positive , there is outright violence too . but for example realise on days that use wheelchair , people even more likely infantise and coo and just get , really really weird . familiar nurses already explain blood pressure cuff every single time go in to doctor , but when in wheelchair will almost coo and hold .

think definitely people feel these is nice things to do and say , and of course some people might appreciate ... but not all , probably not even most . is true that world say , bad if not smart , bad if not strong , bad if need more help ... so on and so on . 

but not fix that with say , " promise really is smart , strong , promise not even see as disabled . " how fix is that make world where not problems to start with .

some people is smart , or strong , or not need rely on aids . and not wrong for people be happy with those things in self , that have these skills , that not lose any skills to need aids because that in self almost always huge trauma to go through .

but also , world should be able value people regardless what can do , can not do , need , and not need . not everyone need be smart or strong or super talent or anything . some people - maybe lots more than even realise , because so many people try move fast and be " most valuable " in some way - happy with just , be . 

not that something need be good for everyone just to be worth change because even smallest groups deserve good , but , if stop value people just because certain traits or uses . everyone would be happier .

[thestarseersystem]

...... about the little syscourse going on.

hypersexual littles are real. alters splitting from a hypersexual child are bound to be at least hypersexual. so its not cool to be like, "ew littles should never approach or think about this topic, and if you do try to discuss it, you're a pedophile". Please don't. Hypersexuality, especially in emotionally stuck or stunted parts are bound to feel attached to being treated or "loved" that way. Because that's the only way they know how to cope, even if it's problematic or wrong. It's just a part of some people's realities.

Not all littles are even fucking children. They hold traits and have a connection to childhood memories. Littles refer to the psychological, "inner child". Some system's "inner child", are just more like physical minors, and some are not like physical minors at all.

No one is saying every little ever can consent. Most of us are just referring to the fact that all our alters are capable and deserving of autonomy, not that we want to force or make people have sex. That's fucking crazy. And anyone who does say that can fucking die.

Saying littles can consent is not saying they necessarily need or want to consent, it's saying they have the choice and decision to consent if they so choose. And if you think that people are going to manipulate or coerce our littles into saying yes, you're going to have to get through at least 15 other alters, all armed to the teeth in preparation of a day ever happening like this. If you think we aren't capable of handling it ourselves, you are extremely mistaken.

And have you ever even thought that perhaps enforcing rules or ideas that our alters need to be regulated or controlled, could be reenacting abuse onto us? Have you ever thought that perhaps the hypersexuality is a coping mechanism to try to make the way we have been controlled all throughout our childhood, something desirable or nice? Have you ever thought that maybe the lack of power we had as kids were the reason we were violated, and that this is the only way we can ensure healthy protection?

I'm not saying that you EVER have to make your littles consent, and I'm not saying it's healthy or good for you to do so. I am saying that it is not fair to accuse someone of being predatory just because they say "littles can consent". I am saying it is not right and not your duty to make sure other alters from systems are safe. I am saying that you should treat everyone as if they have the right to consent, because they are a human being that is deserving of human rights.

Everyone deserves autonomy, no matter what, even for people who you think should be controlled or regulated or "protected". But do not, never enforce your ideas or beliefs or "protection" onto someone else without their express permission to do so.

Because this is what it's all about. You do not have permission to tell any of my alters what to do, regardless of their role or status in my system, have I made that clear?

[a-purely-objective-frog]

Everyone Sokka posting is is really starting to piss me off - y'all're so mad about hypothetical changes to a character when the show isn't even OUT YET. Acting like him not being daddy's little misogynist is a critical blow to the bones of the show when it's just. Not. Spoilers ahead

Sokka is a boy playing at warriorhood who becomes a leader and learns to trust his instincts and capabilities. Sokka is a non-bender in a group of the most terrifying bender motherfuckers on the planet who learns that his value lies in other places, but is not less than theirs. Sokka is a kid who lost his family to a war against an enemy presented as faceless and unambiguously evil, who learns that war is complicated on all sides, that no one side is perfect, who meets evil waterbenders and good firebenders and everyone in between and learns about the complexity of the human experience. Sokka is an abandoned child with responsibilities that weigh heavily on him, who learns that people really do come back, and he can lean on them, he can trust them to carry their own weight and to help him when he needs it. He is a southern water tribe member navigating his relationship with a world that forgets him, a brother navigating his complicated relationship with his sister, a boy navigating his journey to manhood. He is all of this way more than he is a misogynist.

Sokka's misogyny is so little of his character in my opinion, Suki beats it out of him early on and it's hard to maintain a "girls suck" attitude in a universe where the most terrifying motherfuckers you could ever make the mistake of crossing are girls younger than him (azula, toph, katara). I think it makes sense for him to be less misogynistic, in fact, I generally think the water tribe misogyny plots are tired and wouldn't be sad if they got cut.

Sokka's revelation that "I should respect women bc they can kick my ass" is so 2000s feminism for children. Very basic, reductive, good for children's media (which atla is, yay) but the new show is obviously aiming for people who enjoyed the show as children, and now we're older, we can understand complicated concepts like "you should respect women bc the are people, all of whom you should respect". And personally, I always hated the "misogynist makes a 180 after getting his ass handed to him" trope, I'm a physically very small girl, youngest of my family, with all brothers. To this day they could pick me up and throw me with ease. "Respect me or I'll kick your ass" doesn't work when the smallest of your brothers is twice your weight and 6" taller than you. I shouldn't have to beat you in a fight for you to treat me with basic human decency. Basic respect applies to everyone, regardless of martial arts skills.

Honestly, mild tangent here, the Pakku conclusion also bothers me. Katara loses and then he sees her necklace and... what? "I'm going to be nice to you bc I have a crush on your grandma" is uncomfortably adjacent to "I respect women only if I find them to be attractive and available". Are you serious? Anyways, back to Sokka, why does he need to be a misogynist? Is that really an essential character trait?

If you need an "in universe" explanation for why he wouldn't be, my man was raised in a village without men. I understand that women can be misogynistic and can pass those ideas on to their children (hi mom) but Sokka only noticing women are capable when one beats him up seems dumb even for him. They run his entire village. Women are in charge of everything bc all the men are away for basically his whole childhood. Either Sokka has literally never practiced warriorhood, or he has practiced with girls. Breaking news: local idiot notices the sky is blue

He doesn't have to be perfect or unproblematic. He can be inconsiderate and stubborn. His invasion plan fails, and he is manipulated by Azula. He parentifies his younger sister. He minimizes the importance of Katara and Aang' empathy as weakness. He blames himself for everything. He's an impatient complainer. He has plenty of other directions to grow.

My main worry is that the show is going to suck. They're gonna go full disney live action and make changes that they don't explore in any way just to have it be different so people watch it. I don't see the spark. I worry it's being made to capitalize on how beloved the show is and get those nostalgia dollars, not because they have anything interesting or important to say.

This has the potential to be a good change - in a well run show. I worry this is not gonna be a well run show. If you're one of the people mortally offended at the removal of your emotional support misogyny - consider why that specific aspect of that character is so important to you. I, too, have emotionally charged opinions about pieces of media that are important to me. I think it's good to self reflect on why. Is this about Sokka, or about change? Is this about the fear that something you love is going to be mistreated by corporations who don't love it, and that the things you love will be ruined by time?

Nostalgia is a helluva drug, and I think it's reasonable to be emotionally attached to your childhood media. I think disney has set a precedent of making really shitty remakes, which makes people understandably nervous for remakes. I love atla too. I worry about this show. I want it to be good. I fear it won't be. I understand seeing changes to the show as a threat to its integrity, if they change this, what else will they change?

Anyways, I'm always looking to broaden my horizons, if you have any in-depth opinions on this topic and are willing to discuss, hmu

[muraenide]

While we most definitely see most of Jade's negative traits amplified in the course of the story and in most of his personal cards, it's important to note that Jade isn't inherently an "evil" person. People of his type can be described by a lot of other words, such as selfish, heartless, unsympathetic, and cold, but none of those words are directly describing a person who is "evil". He is not the most kind-hearted, angelic soul in existence, yes, but there are also people who are more willing to do worse things than Jade and not look back or think twice about who they'll hurt in the process. Jade, at least, in most cases, asks for permission and/or apologizes for what he's done. In some cases, he's sorry for the people he hurts, even if, given the chance to turn back time he is not very likely to pick otherwise. But it's worth noting that he acknowledges the bad and the good of his actions and that he is conscious.

Jade's "kind, caring, polite" side and his "manipulative, cruel, relentless" side are both true to his original person. Neither of them is a facade. However, both of them are only the surface-level kind of interaction and intimacy that he allows himself to reveal to others in the scenario that they aren't close. It's true that Jade is more fond of baring his potential to be manipulative/cruel, part of the reason is that because it's fun, except that to Jade, it's harmless fun. The same as flashing your fangs at a few smaller fishes and watch them scatter in fright, but there was never any real intention to bite or hurt someone. One might notice that Jade tends to be kinder and more caring when someone reveals part of themselves to him, such as their insecurities or a piece of their past that they never really got to let go of. Jade has never been known to mock or make fun of that person. Instead, most times he'll offer an alternative perception or even advice them on how they might be able to approach said situation. Since, if these types of conversations ever happened, Jade recognizes that they're entrusting him with something deeply precious and intangible to them(trust), and he is not about to betray that or be an ass about it.

This might make him sound a bit too nice now, but that is not the case. Jade's not the type who will initiate these conversations. He will not walk up to someone randomly and ask after them. Because the truth is, outside of Azul and Floyd, Jade is indifferent to everyone else in the school. Not to say that he doesn't care about them, but simply that he doesn't care enough to constantly monitor their mental and physical health or ask them to hang out. However, this does not change the fact that Jade's actually not inherently a cruel person. He ironically highly values justice, honesty, and integrity. So while he feels no desire to be heroic and will never, ever go out of his way to "save" someone, if he ever encounters an event of injustice, such as undeserved bullying or that his apparent conversation partner is wrongly accusing/assuming someone who does not deserve their reputation to be dragged through the mud, he will take the chance to rectify wrongful accusations/anything that he thinks is undeserved.

Another one of Jade's positive traits is that he's very highly unlikely to invalidate a person's words. Should someone tell him that they are unwell/paranoid/upset, he takes their word for it. If you tell him that you're feeling like you're being stalked recently? He'll believe you. He wouldn't even suggest that you might be hallucinating. Regardless of how trivial the issue is, Jade takes their word for absolution without a second thought. However, he's known to retract that privilege once there is a breach of trust. And he might never give it back. The downside of this is that Jade avoids reading social cues so really, telling him is the only way to convey a message properly.

In conclusion: Jade is a highly closed-off person, but his real attitude does shine once you get through the shallow parts of a relationship with him. He'll let some of it slip while he's still acquaintances or strangers with someone, but once they have enough interactions to be considered friends or even close, Jade would ease into a more personal relationship with them. He might paint them a portrait of themselves or sketch them a doodle, have them a model for a sculpture, play board games to crack their heads over puzzles, make them taste some of his newer inventions before he makes them part of Mostro Lounge's menu, or invite them to watch a movie together and suggest staying overnight. The latter is fairly rare since Jade values his personal space above all else and letting someone in there requires a great deal of comfort and trust from his side.

[mobius-m-mobius]

Bottle Rocket anon reporting in 🫡

First off I very much appreciate your note about Bob’s big brother in fact being Owen’s big brother—I did think Future Man had a curiously outsized role in the behind the scenes. Granted, that behind the scenes’ whole vibe was ‘we emailed everyone involved, professionally shot three who turned up, and stuck in the self-filmed rambles mailed in by a smattering of others’, so I sort thought maybe his screen time was a matter of ‘well, he did in fact show up’—although itbf his being Owen’s brother doesn’t strictly discount that theory 😆 (Also my other favorite bit of that video was the very opening clip where Wes is talking about how people tend to respond strongly to his films, whether positively or negatively, and the cameraman goes, ‘well, that tells you something!’ and Wes replies with such earnest befuddlement, and a tinge of hope like this cameraman just might reveal the secret of it all to him: “Yes, but what?”

I haven’t properly sat down for another film yet, but I’ve been putting on the Night at the Museum films in the background. I have seen them before when I was pretty young—in fact it’s about the only thing I’d seen Owen Wilson in for more than a cameo pre-Loki. Between having watched the NatM movies at an age when I only vaguely distinguished between actors and characters, and the association being reinforced by Owen’s habitual cowboy hat, for a long time Owen Wilson and that excitable little man were basically synonymous in my mind.

So going back to it now was, silly though it may be, the first time I watched it going ‘oh hey—that actor right there is acting! :D’ And sure it’s no Mobius or Dignan for complexity, but it’s good acting, too! Genuinely I think it’s one of the best performances in the series when it comes to capturing the sort of cartoon-y tone of all the museum-pieces while also giving the feeling that that’s a whole person right there. And he also, once again, a completely different physicality to Mobius or Dignan. I adore the choice to play his physicality in such a way that it sometimes feels like his body just isn’t big enough to contain or express the size of his emotions.

I also didn’t realize I’d never watched the third film until I started it, which was a nice surprise. And I knew about the whole handholding bit with Jedediah and Octavius, but not the context. It has such clearly defined beats of: Oct: “We should hold hands.” Jed: “For what reason 👀” Oct: "No reason! Unrelated, I am in fact gay.” Jed: “Hell yeah, hand holding time.” (With an added dash of sweetness in that it’s become a well-defined character trait that Jed is ready to deploy his dying speech at any time, but once it’s been established as on the table he goes, ‘I’d rather just be close to you, actually). Anyway, to me at any rate it plays as ‘close to canon as we could get away with in a big budget 2014 kids movie’, and I do appreciate it.

Hi again Bottle Rocket anon, always a pleasure!! 😊🚀💖

Oh I'm positive you're right about Andrew getting such a big role in the bts documentary just because he showed up regardless of being Owen's brother lmao, but they did luck out considering of everyone involved from an acting perspective he was the most likely one to actually give them decent talking points regarding the process leading up to filming, set vibes, and more insight on Owen and Wes than Owen and Wes themselves actually wanted to 😂

Definitely feel you too about not finding time to sit for another movie as I'm just the same and when I do manage enough free time to start one it's still not even enough to finish in a single sitting 😅 You're not the first who's mentioned NatM being the main association with Owen pre-Loki which is completely understandable, I hadn't seen any of the movies until after Loki S1 and would've been way happier having grown up with an excitable mini cowboy at the forefront of my mind, lol.

Love that you brought up his physicality and setting the vibe because one major thing that's constantly delighted me about Owen is how he naturally adjusts to not only the tone of a film but the other actors in a scene better than anyone I've seen before and I think people really underestimate how valuable that is?? It's easy to think "oh well that's just what acting is" but actually pulling it off across such a huge range of genres the way that he does is really rare and like you mentioned in NatM it's extremely noticeable that he makes Jed feel real in a very exaggerated premise which also stands out massively in his cameos where I always find myself wishing whatever movie took place during the ten minutes he showed up in is the full movie I was actually watching because he's such a breath of fresh air.

Also constantly get caught up in the way he carries himself because that's such a huge element to the personality of his characters! In comparison to how Dignan approaches people in a unexpectedly blunt way that leaves them wanting more and Mobius intrigues in such a genuine manner that catches everyone off guard, for all Jed's teasing he's direct enough that Octavius knows where he stands but not so much so that there isn't room for the big dramatic moments they both enjoy before settling right back at his side. It's not only nice to see they did get as close to canon as likely was possible in such a big budget kids movie but that we all at least have a lasting ship of Owen's with a happy ending to console ourselves with after the Loki finale! Small victories and all that, haha

[crystalelemental]

Unit Teambuilding - Palmer

Don't think I can get over that he's actually a PokeFair. I know people complain about random nobodies being PokeFair but I think this is the worst one. This is a guy who can literally be skipped. You could easily just never meet Palmer. "Oh, but he's Barry's dad so everyone knows him!" I guess? I dunno, man, Palmer never left an impression on me, and I'm a Sinnoh Simp.

General Overview Striker. Normal type with Regigigas. Uh oh.

If you're thinking this is an easy skip, think again. Normal Zone, a base move with 260BP, a Buddy move that's a Max Move, an actual Max Move, good multipliers, and I shit you not, +3 Physical Moves Up Next each attack after he has a sync buff. Just a flat +120% bonus damage every attack. That is obscene. It's also what you need to counteract lack of supereffective damage.

Normal types can never on-type, and thus have approximately half the damage output of other types. As a result, think about how rough off-typing is without really good offensive traits. That's what Normal needed. And Palmer finally delivers. Normal Zone, 260BP move at 1/5, and an entire +120% bonus to every single attack after first sync from anywhere. Palmer is a monster.

But I promised being harsh on things now, so here's the consideration against Palmer: what Normal types do damage?

No really, think about this one. I've pulled every Zone unit because I am a slut for field effects, and a huge part of that is the team support. What team is Palmer supporting? What Normal types do damage? The answer: there aren't any. Gladion's type shift means he doesn't care about Normal Zone. Hugh and Norman, the only two with actual DPS as normal types, have severe recoil that will kill them instantly. Everyone runs Headbutt and Body Slam for utility, since damage is unreliable. The only character who cares is Hugh, who's about as strong as Palmer's sync even after Palmer gets Tech Role, but whose EX sync spreads damage, which means weakening Crush Grip significantly. Palmer has a supportive effect, but no one to support, and nothing else to offer. He doesn't really have debuffing ability, the Buddy move is meant to kill. So he's an astonishingly poor Zone setter, and exists just for his own damage. If he's not a favorite, why bother? Normal isn't a required typing.

I also want to talk about another issue: fast-ramping. Many are indicating a preference for Palmer teams to focus on fast-ramping, since his +3 PMUN every attack after sync is considered ideal, so just rush to sync. Problem: Palmer's setup is three turns. Two turns to boost, and one to set Zone. If you shave a turn off of that, you now require a support that boosts Atk/crit, which isn't specifically hard to come by, but may be wasteful given Palmer's capability. With an EX Support sync, he's likely one-shotting a side regardless, so what value is there in the fast-ramp? I really do think it's an overrated approach.

EX, Role, and Move Level? 3/5 gets him multipliers. His Role is Tech. Which is a nice bonus to his sync, don't get me wrong. But listen. I don't think you should EX Palmer. At time of writing, we don't know how sharply his DPS drops on Crush Grip. Dealing damage via sync is disadvantageous, and Palmer's sync is notably weak without the role. With it, he's hitting around Hugh's damage. Without it, it's chip damage at best, and may ruin the BP of Crush Grip. Palmer especially wouldn't want that on spread damage. I think Palmer's the type of sync pair that never, ever wants to touch sync. Let the Support EX do it, and then crush everything.

Team 1: Palmer, SS Acerola, Tech Kangaskhan I mean, come on. Just stack physical moves to high hell and use a Tech Eggmon with matched theme skills for Leer, see how long that stage lasts.

Team 2: Palmer, Lodge Acerola, Hugh/Whitney Getting slightly more dynamic, Lodge Acerola gives the stats needed for Palmer to take only one turn of self-setup. Her ability to boost speed on dodges, including successful confuse hits, is also helpful to sustain a potential dual strike comp. Enter Hugh, who is packing the last few tools needed. First, a flinch rate in Headbutt, to stall out turns. Second, a high-power finishing move to take care of something with low HP that Palmer can't one-shot. But I also want to mention the Whitneys. Both are fairly decent Tech nukes, just languishing in Normal type. With a Zone, they're able to nuke much more effectively. And notably, their sync does not spread, meaning that Palmer's Crush Grip is able to maintain at full power.

Team 3: Palmer, Winter Whitney, Hugh For more Gauntlet contexts, or just ambitious 3v3s, Winter Whitney is a nice tank. Considering you always play off-type and can't take Standard Damage Reduction, Horn Leech is on the table for sustain. that said, The real reason I bring her up is the combination of flinch, and Terrain benefits. Electric gets speed, Grass gets defense drops. Both are excellent. I mention Hugh as another good flinch bot to really lock down an opponent while Whitney focuses on Move Gauge Boost to set up the Terrain, but also if you have the increased secondary chance of moves thing active in CS, their flinch should be at like 90%, so you can really just deny everything.

Final Thoughts Palmer is incredibly straightforward as a Striker, but god is it funny. This what Normal types needed. What a guy. It's a shame this month jaded me into picking one sync pair for the month, or I'd go for him.

[kdipshit]

The Borderline Between Love And War ;

The intensity, in which I feel, isn’t mine really to ever begin with. Picture moving smoke, now picture that in a more dense form, its just energy, which is exactly what every thing else is, therefore my feelings are just that, energy that moves and flows like a wind. I feel every colour in full, I feel like my skin turns itself inside out what I’m anxious, I feel raw, I don’t feel scared… and I don’t mean I’m not trying to feel scared, I just feel scared without feeling scared. I feel scared without the thought attachment. I just feel the energy that my body was always meant to withstand. “Scared” actually feels rather cooling, when I don’t let my head get to it.

Its like a game of tug of war, between love and war.

I don’t want to start this off sad, because I am not sad, nor do I feel bad for having said illness, nor should I be made to feel that way. :) I’m a very happy chap, in fact, I’ve never been more free. Or maybe its naivety.

Surrendering to the feeling of categorising my mind, it is one. How? Hei ana. Find something that doesn’t change SO quickly, my eating changes, my thoughts change, my hobbies change, my feelings change, I’m not sure I have much of a belief system, the strength of said belief system wouldn’t be the greatest either… I find it hard for myself to sometimes start writing because its nothing like anything I have ever read, but I’ve come to the realisation that I actually don’t fucking read anything, I skim, as its hard for my eyes to keep up with the pace of my reading, looking like stars on the page lol. Sometimes, only if I put my attention on it, does it ever get worse. If this attention thing is real, why not try using it to manifest, by putting your attention on the traits, skills, mindsets and knowledge that I am lacking in order to achieve such rewards. Motivation is something I struggle with, aswell, I’m not sure if it has anything to do with my mood swings yet, mood change feels like a transition on its own, go from feeling happy to sad with no real intermission. But also motivated to zero motivation. It doesn’t just effect my feelings, it effects my physical body and it effects ‘Akayla’, it effects the character I am, it effects the ego and causes it to malfunction, it effects the safety systems I have in place, mentally, spiritually, physically and all those in between. Hei ana.

Im angry, because I’m fucking hungry and I was just about to cook, I don’t want to be in this house, ill tell you what I feel like, I feel like its a power trip and my mother is a hypocrite, says one things, does the other, treats people exactly how she doesn’t want to be treated. My mother is that kind of person. She’s not a nice girl or a kind person, thats not how you would explain my mother. She’s cut throat, possessive, mean and confusing. Those are whatever you think they are, it only matters what kind of thought attachment you have behind it, which has 100% got to do with only you. perception itself isn’t real, your thoughts and attachments and feelings make it real, your attention makes it real.

anyways. My body was make to withstand these energies, and anything that comes my way, I am capable, the more capable I am, the better the opportunity for the energy you desire, it’s sorta like a game in a way. The better you do the better you get but like one day and one step at a time, be happy in all of those moments, be calm (no fear), be present, that’s how I do better, for the world continues to spin, regardless of how anybody feels, it doesn’t effect the physical, but the mental is just as big.

I just can’t fkn get over it aye, it really fkn pisses me off when I give it attention lmao. Do better. maybe dealing with my anger that is already here will diminish the anger in the future…

Can I thank my strong feelings for my strong connection to my Māori side ?

The more I think about how bad it is, the worse it gets, I might die to keep my peace. I can put a story, a time or a person on a song, and at peak level, it hurts. There is no valid excuse to not do better, that’s just the ego trying stay alive

Trying to run away from boredom has only ever given me anxiety, something wants to be felt. The present scares me in a way I’m scared of jumping off the cliff. Writing requires a lot of thinking, but the thoughts that I have chosen given the energy in which surrounds me. Its hard for me to write, but you could never tell.

My writing even, is painful to do sometimes, most of these times have ben hard, and its not because I want to see my life in a negative, or want to have a negative time here, Its how I feel, and its okay, you must feel it, and move along life with them, instead of holding on.

[holdinbacksecrets]

the sequel u made to the All Flowers fic, words can not explain how much i luv u for making that. it just, it feels sooooo nice to hear someone say that my hair is beautiful, even if it’s short nd not straight or long or silky. i mean ik my hair is really cool nd i can do a lot wit it, but sometimes i cry early in the morning about why my hair can’t go like this or be able to make a good bun without it looking “weird.” sometimes i also hate how exposed i am to the world nd i can’t hide my face when i feel overwhelmed. but what u wrote gave me some relief nd made me smile, so thank you <333

🥹🥹🥹

thank you so much for sharing this with me, truly. that piece was so self indulgent, but i hoped it would resonate with at least one person. i shaved my head as a sophomore in high school, and i’ve kept it pretty short ever since. prior to that decision, i also cried in the morning when i tried to do my hair. it was exhausting. curls are cool and fun and gorgeous, but i’ve always felt so far from the standard of beauty, especially as i’ve gotten older. i didn’t have easily accessible media where the main character had curly hair and their love interest called it beautiful etc etc.

what you said about feeling exposed… yes. oh my goodness yes. i experience that as well. having curly hair is such a nuanced experience, with positives and negatives, and i’ve spent far too many years feeling insecure about it. i chose to set down those insecurities and write “those movies are overrated anyways.” from a place of love. obviously we should be ok with physical traits regardless of what others think, but it’s silly to believe opinions aren’t influential. i started talking to this guy a couple years ago, and he complimented my hair. i feel like my soul lit up. after years go by of listening to people compliment long, silky hair, it feels fucking incredible when someone says “no, your hair is beautiful. i love your curls. i love how bright your smile is. i see it form across the room.” we all need that. we all deserve that. i’m so glad what i wrote gave you some relief. i got a bit carried away, but i’m passionate about this as a woman of color. sending you love 🖤🫂

[ganymedesclock]

I think there's a tricky place we can fall into with discourse about prejudice where the pattern goes,

"sometimes people will be angry! Demanding minorities to be sanitized and peaceful and pleasant to groups that have hurt them and in the face of behaviors that continue to hurt them is unfair!"

Which is a good thought!

But then it becomes, "it is always ethical to bully people who are More Privileged Than You!"

At which point there are three problems,

Problem one is that bully mentalities are not good, not in a moral sense as much as a practical one. Even incidents we do celebrate, like that one time a neonazi spokesperson got punched, we don't celebrate because it's a bullying action. It was a targeted act of deplatforming. That guy wasn't embarrassed because we wanted to snap his underwear and send him home crying. The punch was a means to take the platform away from a dangerous person who was using it to spread hate speech. The goal is to stop the harm. The goal is to stop the harm.

The goal is not to be a bully, because being a bully feels good and fun and cathartic and the more you encourage that impulse the more you will actively want to find people to bully, because it feels good, and being left alone with your feelings doesn't feel so good. So the categories broaden. As a means to vent anger it fails, because it makes you angrier, because you want to be angrier, because if you have more justifications there are more people to hurt. An endless buffet of people to hurt! You're better than ALL of them! (Not good for you, not good for praxis, not good to be around)

Problem two is that every human being on the planet is complicated and Privilege is a thing we can identify much more easily in vague abstract than we can in practice. Trying to split hairs and divide everything down to the finest degree to rule who outranks who on the great objective scale of privilege, creates a model where people are incentivized to strip themselves down to victim status for credibility. And most of the categories are extremely broad and affect people to very different degrees. Is my disability "disabled enough" for people? Or because I don't have physical disabilities and I'm not nonverbal, should I shut up forever, regardless of what I'm saying? Are strangers on the internet entitled to my medical history?

At that point it's basically just repeating ableism- you're only credible if you're suffering SO much you can't live without help and then we should all pity you and see you as such a victim. And that's just one example. There's a lot of ways this can go wrong.

Problem three- and the thing that inspired me to make this post- is that if you establish a narrative where the closer to a cis, white, straight, perisex, allosexual, able-bodied, english-speaking christian man in America someone is, the worse a person they inherently are, which gives ownership to all these qualities to the worst people.

I feel like I often see jokes or discussions of characters where male characters are ascribed 'stupidity' as a trait when the thing that the audience is clearly actually reacting to is that he's. nice. trustworthy. patient. And I feel like that's kind of unfair, isn't it? Are we implying any sufficiently smart man would hurt and maltreat others? That the best thing he can be is stupid? As a transmasc person myself, I don't really like the idea that if I reached a point in my transition where people saw me as a man more than anything else, they'd be afraid of me and have to decide if they think I'm too stupid to hurt them.

Men don't inherently suck, cis-heteronormativity creates a shitty box to put men in and this experience hurts them. If the hypothetical Perfectly Normative Man I listed above is the winner of the 'game' that prejudice creates (again, in America, not necessarily in every country) he wins a really bad prize. The primary nexus of misogyny, of racism, homophobia, transphobia, acephobia, ableism, prejudice against intersex people and non-christian religions and secular beliefs are directed off him, but he is made a soldier for these causes because he is never that far off the crosshairs. A cis straight man is often culturally socialized to be terrified of queerness because there is always the warning he could fail to measure up, and become rejected like those Others. Virtually always, in some way, he is already Other himself, even if he hits all the 'correct' categories he may not hit them in a way that power approves of.

This is a system that perpetuates itself through suffering, and the worst possible men, cis people, straight people, so on and so forth do not deserve to be given the right and privilege to speak for the category.

[mercy-burning]

Myth or Movie

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: Unbeknownst to the two of them, Y/N and Spencer's children have worked up a plan to get them to meet... Category: SMUT (18+) Content: Strong language, oral sex (female receiving), penetrative/unprotected sex, someone is misgendered (nothing too bad, it’s very brief, and it’s sincerely apologized for by the person who misgenders) Word Count: 4.2k

MASTERLIST

NOTE: This is my 2nd entry for Pom’s ( @imagining-in-the-margins ) Enemies To Lover’s Writing Challenge! This one was one of the prompts she provided: You and (Character)'s kids don't get along, so you have to have a talk. Turns out you... really really get along... and I couldn’t wait to tackle it! I believe my exact words were: “I’m gonna Parent Trap these bitches”... So do with that what you will lol

———

"I'm so sorry I'm late!"

Two heads turn to stare at me as I burst through the doors. I'm out of breath from running through the building, something the staff really didn't seem to appreciate, though their shouts and annoyed glances were the last thing on my mind.

As I try to catch my breath, the two heads stand, and suddenly I feel a lot smaller.

One of them I recognize— Principal Anteros. I'd met with her before over some of Sky's academic achievements, all positive things, which is why today's circumstances make being in this office rather uncomfortable.

It's also why I seem to shrink with embarrassment at my tardiness— and appearance. Waitressing has its benefits, but today's whirlwind of phone calls and a mention at meeting another parent are not any of them.

Speaking of, the other person in the room is one I've never seen before. He's taller than both Anteros and I, extremely well dressed, and probably the most intimidatingly beautiful human being I'd ever met. I can barely meet his eyes, and so I try not to think about what he's doing here—to think about having to talk to him.

I shrink even further.

"Ms. Y/L/N," Principal Anteros greets. Thankfully she doesn't sound too upset given the circumstances. "Please, have a seat."

I do, brushing off my uniform as if that will somehow help my appearance. The soft leather of the chairs, however comfortable they might be, fail to bring me any comfort at all.

"As I'm sure you've guessed already, this is Doctor Reid, Vivian's father."

Great, he's a fucking doctor? This already bodes well for me...

Regardless of my reservations, I turn to him and give a faint smile. He waves in turn, and for the time being I'm extremely glad he doesn't insist on shaking my hand.

"It's nice to meet you," he says, surely nothing but a formality.

"You, too," I say quickly, then turn back to Principal Anteros. "Your phone call sounded urgent... Is everything alright?"

As soon as I say it, I feel kind of dumb. Because of course everything isn't alright. My child's principal called a meeting with another parent, and that can never mean anything good, not to mention the fucking intimidation and awkwardness in the room right now. I almost apologize, trying to explain that that wasn't exactly what I meant to get across, but then I would have just been talking for way too long, embarrassing myself further.

Once again, I'm thankful for Anteros's ability to move the conversation along. "I'm not sure, but it doesn't seem so. I only bring this to attention because Sky and Vivian are both stellar students. They've never had any disciplinary issues or difficulties with other students..."

"No one's hurt, right?" Mr. Reid asks. I know he's just concerned for his child, but for some reason it feels like an attack on me, like he assumes my kid had something to do with it.

"No, no one's hurt. Thankfully there weren't any physical altercations. But it seems your girls are quite... loud."

The doctor looks like he wants to say something, but I'm quick to jump in before he can. "Sorry... Sky is non-binary. They use they/them pronouns."

I half expect one or either of them to make a big deal or just roll their eyes at me, as most people seem to do when I correct them on the matter, but Anteros gives a sincere apology and Reid probably couldn't have cared any less.

I still can't tell if I like him or not...

But that doesn't matter right now.

"What do you mean by loud?" I continue.

Anteros sighs. "Well, while there hasn't been any physical violence, your kids seem to have very heated arguments, usually during lunch or in the hallway in passing... We thought maybe we could resolve it here since, like I said, they're both excellent students, but then it started escalating to classroom arguments... It's a lot of screaming..."

I have never known Sky to raise their voice at anyone, not even in a situation where I probably would have. Lord knows I'm thankful they don't have my impatience and tendency to get pissed off easily...

So what happened that was so bad, it made them snap?

"You... You're sure you mean Vivian is acting out like this?" Reid asks slowly, and I can't stop myself from laughing out loud.

"Come on, she's a professional. This has been going on for weeks, in her school, I'm sure she would know if it was your kid having a screaming match with someone else..."

This time Doctor Reid actually looks over at me, an eyebrow raised, and though I very much believe what I've just told him, the way he's looking at me right now drops my heart straight down to my stomach, like he's the principal and I'm the student acting out—No, it's worse than that... I feel like he's a disappointed parent, but not with Vivian, with me.

I avoid his intimidating stare and look down at the ground. "Sorry... I'm just... This isn't like Sky, either, I don't know what to do..."

"Well, usually when we have these sort of disputes, we like to have the students talk it out amongst themselves with a moderator present. But we've tried that, and it seems that they still haven't made any progress. Now, I know your children are good at heart, and it seems like you both are excellent parents— You know your children better than anyone here ever could. So, I'm proposing the two of you take a meeting some time and try to figure out how to settle this."

Seriously? If it hasn't been made clear already, this man is a doctor of some kind, planets away from my league in any capacity, and I can just picture the two of us in a screaming match close to what I imagine our children's looked like...

Maybe we can just e-mail.

"Okay," he agrees evenly, and I'm surprised he seems this calm considering I've just practically yelled at him... "I have free time this afternoon if you want to talk it over."

"I have to get back to work, but I get done at five," I sigh, wanting to get this over with. "Are you free then?"

"Mhm."

"Good," Anteros chirps, standing and leaving Doctor Reid and I to follow suit. "Perhaps over the weekend we can get this settled."

I sure as hell hope so.

———

"Ms. Y/L/N, wait!"

I have no idea what he could possibly want from me now that we've set a time and place to talk tonight, but I'm just praying desperately that he doesn't want to take this time alone in the parking lot to get back at me for accosting him in Anteros's office...

Thankfully, his face when he approaches seems rather kind.

"You can call me Y/N..."

"Right," he says, shoving his hands in his jacket pockets and nodding. "I'm Spencer."

"Spencer... So, um... Did you need something?"

"O—Oh, I just... I know you have to get back to work so I'll make this short, but I wanted to see if you wanted to do, uh... dinner tonight?"

"Excuse me?"

"Well, I just figured since we probably didn't expect for our weekend to go this way... We should make it worth it?"

"Are you really trying to turn this into a date?"

"W— No, not really, I just... You know, I thought it might be nice to... make this less like a chore, you know? A—And don't feel like you have to say yes, it was just a thought, I'm sorry if I made this weirder..."

The fact that I still can't figure this man out bothers me, but right now he's blushing, and he looks like he's trying to save himself from embarrassment, and it's so fucking adorable that I don't really care that I was just annoyed.

So I tell him, "Sure. Why not?"

"Really?"

"Yeah... Besides, Lord knows I haven't gone out for dinner in a long time."

The doctor is relieved, a smile creeping up on his lips that suddenly tugs at my insides and makes me wish for a second that it really is a date he's offering... "Okay, good. Do you want to meet at Waterstone, seven o'clock?"

The excitement starts to drain from me as he says it, followed by an incoming wave of embarrassment. "Oh, man, that... That place is kind of expensive, I don't—"

"Oh, it's okay, I'll pay for everything. I'll even wait outside for you so we can go in together if you'd like..."

Why he's being so nice to me I have no idea, but it's making my annoyance melt and my heart start to beat faster, and I really don't know how to feel about that. In fact I'm pretty sure it's weird as fuck given the circumstances.

But all I have to do is make it through this weekend, hopefully all will be back to normal, and I won't ever have to think about it ever again.

"Alright... It's a date."

———

Out of all the scenarios I'd pictured for the end of the night, this definitely had not been one of them.

I finished my shift at the diner, imagining on my drive home the look on his face when I inevitably showed up with something on my face or stained on my dress; Instead I showed up to Waterstone and was greeted with wandering eyes and showered with bashful compliments.

I expected to get into some type of argument about how each of our kids were better than the other or something, but we ended up talking through their traits with compassion, interest, and pride, all while agreeing that we just have to sit with them this weekend and explain that there are easier, better ways to sort out disagreements than screaming at each other in public.

I expected not to have much fun at all, but by the time we gathered the check and headed out the door, Spencer and I were laughing, just a little tipsy on Cabernet, our hands gently brushing and sparks shooting up my arm at the feeling.

I expected to go our separate ways and walk to my car and drive home, but instead he ended up telling me he was taking the Subway home, and I offered to give him a ride to the opposite side of town where I lived (Waterstone was right in the middle).

I expected to walk through the door, stumble straight up to bed, and sleep until Sky inevitably woke me up with them saying I've slept in too late and needed to get ready for work, but instead I ended up following Spencer up to his door to say goodnight.

And now we're at a fork in the road, and I can take one of two paths.

I can say goodnight, watch him walk in, and then go home and forget about this whole thing.

Or I can keep letting him stare at me until I find myself leaning in to kiss him. Whether or not he'll actually reciprocate is another story, but the little bit of wine tingling in the surface of my body and the dark, intense look in his eye gives me more courage than I've had since I met him.

Before I can make a move, Spencer talks, his voice small and inviting. "Do you want to come inside?" The beating of my heart quickens immensely as he takes another step forward and brings his fingers out to graze my chin. "Vivian's with her mom tonight."

Yes. Vivian's mom, who divorced Spencer pretty soon in the marriage after she just decided his job was too much to handle. He'd quit and took a teaching job, but even still, she declined his pleading to stay married and eventually admitted that she just wasn't in love with him anymore. At least she had the decency to let him have joint custody once his schedule cleared up, and it seemed like they were decent co-parents. Maybe even friends.

I think about Sky, how much they wish their dad had stayed, and how much I wish he had too. I was devastated when he left without anything more than a note. For years it took a huge toll on us, and I barely had the headspace to even think about dating anyone since then.

But here I am now, standing with this man who has also lost a spouse, who's somewhat of a single parent, and who seems kind and genuine enough that I don't think I'd have to worry about bringing him into the life of my child.

Though, I don't even know it'll go that far. I'm getting too far ahead of myself, and so to slow down I look at what's right in front of me. Right now.

Spencer looks at me like he wants to devour me. My whole body is tingling from head to toe. I want to kiss him, and I'm pretty damn sure he wants to kiss me back. He just invited me inside, which means that if I accept, we'll most likely end up sleeping with each other.

Again... Definitely not one of the scenarios I'd had in mind when I left the school today. But it's a damn good one, and he's so hot I want to cry.

My flirty switch turns on so fast, it nearly gives me whiplash. "And what are you gonna do if I say yes?"

"Depends... How badly do you want to walk tomorrow?"

My first instinct is to jokingly tell him to put me in a wheelchair, but I settle for kissing him instead, hoping that gives the same sentiment.

The way he melts into my body tells me I've succeeded. My arms fly up to his neck and pull him closer, and he holds me tightly to him, waiting for my lips to part so he can expertly slip his tongue past them.

I whine out and take a step towards the door. Spencer comes with me and fumbles with the keys in his pocket before reluctantly pulling away to get us inside.

Once we take our jackets and shoes off, he clings to me like static, drawn to me like a magnet, and I let him near without a second thought. Our lips find each other perfectly, like they've always meant to fit together. And as pieces of clothing come off on our way through the house and up to his bedroom, our limbs fit together just as well. Nothing is out of place.

Hell, I don't even remember how inferior to him I felt earlier in the day. Our jobs and lifestyles might seem like polar opposites, but for right now, the two of us are on very equal footing, coming together like it's always been meant to be.

I nearly fall apart when his fingers gather wetness from my cunt, just enough to tease me before pulling away and bringing them to his lips. I watch with a whine waiting on the back of my tongue as he slips his fingers past his mouth and sighs.

"More," is all he manages, and I want so badly to tease him—tell him how I know he can be more eloquent than that—but words are all lost on me too, when he drops to his knees and spreads me apart with ease. I have no choice but to reach behind and grip the foot-end of the bed as he works his tongue expertly against me.

Each of my sighs and whines are met with more avidity from him, taking the form of sharp flicks of the tongue over my clit, and once he adds his fingers to the mix, pumping them expertly inside me, I'm a fucking goner.

I come with a silent shout, clenching my thighs around his face and gripping the foot of the bed so tightly it feels like my hands might go numb.

Once my body loosens, Spencer gets up and kisses me, nearly knocking me over. I'm breathless and dizzy as the tang of my arousal coats my tastebuds. His hands are gentle despite the hunger in his lips, and the medley of sensations of all of these things has me weak in the knees.

"Getting harder to stand already, sweetheart?" he laughs, catching me as I fall into him. His hands clutch at my thighs and he carries me to the edge of the bed, crawling over top of me and kissing down my neck. "That's okay... I'll take good care of you."

I still can't manage to speak as he gently pushes in, the slow burn of him splitting me in two rendering me utterly incapable of even thought. I gladly welcome the pressure, especially once he's inside me all the way and lowering his body to mine. Our chests press firmly together as he pulls back and starts a steady pace with his hips. He traps me with his arms, bringing them to either side of my face. And when his fingers brush the hair from my eyes, he stares into them with intensity as he fucks me.

It's slow and hard. It's heart-pounding. It's earth-shattering. It's everything that makes sex worth having. In that moment we're two equals, so wrapped up in the mere feeling of each other that everything else is just background noise. He breathes me in and I do the same, and with each cant forward of his hips, he brings me deeper into this world we've both ultimately created together.

I want more than anything to wrap my legs around him and keep him close to me, but he's fucking me so good that I don't have the willpower. Instead, they lay spread out, lazy and open as his hips move between them. I'm warm all over, tingling everywhere our skin connects. When he kisses me, swallowing my pathetic attempts at whimpering his name, I'm positive that this is what Heaven must feel like.

Whether it's hours or only minutes later, eventually my body tenses, unable to hold back any further, and two particularly deep thrusts from Spencer send me barreling over the edge.

"There it is, sweetheart..." he praises, caressing my face with long, gentle fingers and leaving little kisses wherever they trail. His voice only seems to help me along, each warm syllable soothing the muscles that pulled taut at his mercy. "That's a good girl..."

I feel tired, calmed, and relaxed, when he pulls out only to jerk off over my lower stomach. Through tired eyes, I watch as he lets go and covers me with his release. Hearing him grunt out my name as he does it nearly wakes me up again, and it even finally brings some words out of me.

"God, you're so fucking hot..."

Well... Not exactly elegant, but the feeling gets across.

Spencer laughs and rolls over so that he isn't nearly crushing me anymore. He kisses down my neck, my arm, and he ever-so-slightly swipes the tip of his tongue over the mess he made before kissing my thigh and getting up to leave— presumably to get me something to clean up with.

Sure enough, he returns shortly with a wet washcloth and tenderly cleans me up. I manage to sit, leaning back on my elbows once he's done and smile at him. He's practically kneeling in front of me again, smiling back as his lips press featherlight kisses to the inside of my leg.

"How're you feeling?" he drawls, letting me pull him up to lay down with me.

"Really good. I haven't done that in so long..."

"Me either... I um... I hadn't really thought much about seeing other people once Lena and I got divorced... I guess I just wanted to put all my focus into being the best father I could, you know?"

"Mhm," I answer, turning to face him and interlocking our fingers. "I know exactly what you mean."

We lay like that for a few moments in comfortable silence, hands and limbs tangled while we breathe the same air and revel in the afterglow we've just created.

Suddenly Spencer laughs, and I squeeze his hand. "What is it?"

"I was just thinking... We probably wouldn't have met if not for Anteros calling us in, right?"

"Yeah..." I piece it together. "Guess I never thought of it that way."

"I just think it's funny, because in Greek mythology, Anteros was an Erote, known as an avenger of unrequited love, and he punished those who scoffed at romantic advances made by others... You and I never even thought about dating after our separations, and yet... Here we are now, because of Anteros."

Hearing him educate me on Greek mythology only serves to remind me how different we are. Still, the little story brings a comforting smile to my lips. "Well... Remind me to send her a basket of muffins or something to thank her."

"And tell her what? That you're grateful she got you laid?"

"Yeah. And what about it?"

The two of us dissolve into laughter that eventually fizzles and leaves us silent again. Our fingers are still tangled, and somehow we've snuggled in even closer.

"In any case, I'm glad I got to meet you, Doctor Reid."

"And I, you, Ms. Y/L/N..."

———

In the past two weeks since that first meeting, I hadn't received any more phone calls from Principal Anteros, which bode as a good sign.

Spencer and I decided to see each other as secretly as we could, which meant only giving vague details to our kids as to what we were doing in our spare time— It seemed weird to spring it on them if they didn't get along, so we figured it was best to wait until the situation was handled.

I tried to talk to Sky about their progress with Vivian, but they only insisted that everything was fine and they wouldn't have to worry anymore. And after relaying this information to Spencer, he informed me that Viv had said the same thing to him.

It wasn't until we both realized that they'd said the same things verbatim each time we asked, that something odd was going on.

And that's how we end up right here, Sky and I sitting on a park bench bathed in the golden October sun while I patiently wait for Spencer to 'coincidentally' show up with Vivian.

Thankfully I don't have to wait too long, because almost five minutes after we sit, I hear the familiar sound of my name falling from his lips, and it's hard to contain the cocky, playful smile that appears upon my own.

"Spencer, hey!" I call back, standing up and going to give him a hug. He pulls me in and he's nice and warm. He smells like burnt wood for some reason, and I want to breathe him in forever. Instead, I settle for a sweet kiss on the lips, both because I simply want to and also because it should baffle the fuck out of our kids.

Sure enough we pull away and look to them, and they look panicked. They have no idea what to do, what to say...

"Oh! Sorry... Viv, this is Y/N, Sky's mom."

The pure amusement in Spencer's voice makes me feel even warmer than being in his embrace. I look to his daughter and give her a wave. "Hi."

"H—Hi..."

It almost seems cruel to laugh at their predicament, but as I turn to Sky and introduce them to Spencer, they have clear annoyance written all over their face.

"Okay, Mom, I think we get it... How did you guys figure it out?"

"What, that you two pretended to hate each other so your principal would have to call us both in to meet?"

The pre-teens look at each other and sigh, truly defeated once and for all. "Yeah," they mutter simultaneously.

"Well, it surely didn't make any sense when you got in trouble for yelling at each other in the first place," Spencer points out. "And then when we asked you how things were working out, you both said the same exact thing..."

"It wasn't that hard to figure out, but we appreciate the effort," I add, reaching out to ruffle Sky's hair. They jerk away playfully, and I can't help but notice their smile as they peek over at Vivian.

"Our plan worked, though, so I call it a win," Vivian says with a shrug.

"As long as you two don't plan on causing any more disruptions at school..." Spencer looks between the both of them, and then at me, his eyes softening as he takes my hand and squeezes it. "Then yes. I'd call it a win, too."

I lean into him and laugh. "Turns out it wasn't Greek mythology that brought us together. It was The Parent Trap."

He raises an eyebrow, like he doesn't get what I mean, and before I can ask or explain, Vivian does it for me. "He's never seen it."

Spencer looks between the three of us like a lost and confused puppy, and we all laugh.

"Well, then, maybe we'll have to have a movie night sometime soon," I offer, reaching out for Sky.

Hand in hand, the four of us continue down the pathway, walking away from the setting sun while dried leaves rustle under our feet.

———

PERMANENT TAGLIST (tags not working are struck out):

@elldell1204 @muffin-cup @calm-and-doctor @slutforthegubes @rainsong01 @yourmisosoup @liveloudwriteloud @mcureid @la-vie-en-amour1 @edgycowboy666 @averyhotchner @centiaaa @lizziechaseee @coffeeandendlesswords @usuck @spenxerslut @goldensonlyangel @emilyprentisslittlewhore @takeyourleap-of-faith @reidyoulikeabook @spencerreid9 @b-a-utiful @jareauswifey @flipperpenguins @pansexualthing @donald4spiderman @awesomebooklover17 @shemarmooresfedora @izraahh1 @bakugouswh0r3 @singularityjc @xoxospencerreid @thatsonezesty13 @big-galaxy-chaos @mggskneescrew @youabitchhhh @spencersjello @moonlight-2-6 @starrylang @foreveryoungxx3 @spencerreidscoffeecup @morganwilliams @emilyprsntiss @this-is-doctor-and-its-calm @gubswh0re @mrsobrien888 @loveeee2134 @umbreonwolfy @ayla-1605 @reidsbabe @not-that-kind-of-dr-spencer-reid 

If you would like to be added to or removed from the taglist, feel free to message me or leave a comment and I’ll get on it right away!

[gimme-mor]

ACOTAR THINK PIECE: ELAIN ARCHERON, UNTOUCHABLE

*DISCLAIMER*

This will be a long post.

Please take the time to read this post in its entirety and truly reflect on the message I am trying to send before commenting. My goal is to use my background in Gender and Women’s Studies to deconstruct the comments I have seen on Tumblr and Twitter and bring awareness to the ACOTAR fandom.

The reason I am tagging “Elriel” in this post is to call attention to the arguments in the Elriel fandom that: weaponize Elain’s femalehood to shame real life people for their opinions about Elain’s character and her relationship with Lucien; victimize Elain’s character in fandom discussions; and coddle Elain’s character, which limits fandom discussions about her narrative development and prevents the ACOTAR fandom from holding Elain accountable for her actions and inactions in the same way that the fandom holds other characters accountable for their actions and inactions. It is for these reasons that I WILL NOT remove the “Elriel” tag from this post because all of the above points contribute to the toxic discourse surrounding Elain’s character.

I urge those who use these arguments to understand their implications, why they are problematic, regardless of intent, and reexamine their contributions to the ACOTAR fandom. I WILL NOT tolerate anyone who tries to twist my words and say I am attacking people and their personal shipping preferences. In fact, I AM CRITIQUING THE ARGUMENTS THEMSELVES NOT THE PEOPLE USING THE ARGUMENTS.

Also, I highly encourage the Elriel fandom to read this post because it addresses how the concept of choice as an argument enables arguments to exploit social justice and feminist languge in order to vilify Elucien shippers, among other problematic things.

Elain Archeron is one of the most polarizing characters in the ACOTAR fandom. Though opinions about Elain vary, arguments in the Elriel fandom cite society’s perception of traditional female characters in comparison to non-traditional female characters as the reason behind the hate, and this belief is used to provide an explanation as to why other characters in the series are favored over her. In the series, Elain is portrayed in a wholly positive light and this image carries over into the Elriel fandom, painting her character as a good and kind female who has been unfairly wronged and a victim of circumstances that were out of her control. When arguments in the Elriel fandom oppose other viewpoints in the fandom, they fall into one of three categories:

Category 1: Weaponize Elain’s femalehood to shame real life people for their opinions

Maybe people who hate Elain are just jealous of her in a weird way similar to when someone hates the pretty, nice, and charming girl in school just because she is too perfect

Disliking Elain is misogynistic

What happened to feminism? What happened to women supporting women? What happened to she can say no? All of that disappears the second you force Elain to be with Lucien

Elain antis are misogynistic

All Eluciens are Elain antis

Antis claiming they’re feminists when in reality they hate on Elain and Feyre but love Nesta

Elain antis are such sore losers. Y’all were that bunch of people who could not get over being rejected from hanging out with the cool kids so y’all are projecting your hatred towards pretty people now to get validation

I don’t get how Elain’s love for gardening equals boring for some people. I’m sorry your misogyny finds traditionally feminine activities boring

Why are you attacking a female? What did Elain do? Where are your feminist voices?

The fandom is misogynistic towards Elain

If people loved Elain they would ship Elriel

If you hate Elain it says a lot about your feelings toward women

If you hate Elain because she has no “development” then you must hate Azriel because otherwise you’re misogynistic

Eluciens are turned off by the idea of a woman that has the autonomy to reject a man for the simple reason that it is her choice

Eluciens are all about feminism and “it’s HER choice” until it comes down to females not wanting a male

Eluciens don’t respect Elain’s feelings when they ship her with someone that was part of her trauma and makes her feel uncomfortable

The way some Elucien shippers completely disregard how uncomfortable Elain is around Lucien is so hilariously not funny. Prioritizing being mates over Elain’s feelings is just regressive

It’s hard as a fan of Elain to see someone ship her with a person who makes her physically uncomfortable to be around. Wouldn’t you want both characters to be happy to be around each other

Imagine if SJM saw all the awful things her “stans” had to say about Elain

It’s true that we know comparatively little about her, but is she really boring or do you just not value stereotypically feminine traits?

So y’all are just gonna tell me you prefer Elucien over Elriel? Even though Lucien treats Elain as if she’s something that belongs to him? The only reason he wants to be with her is because she’s his mate, he doesn’t respect her, doesn’t treat her as his equal, even though that’s what mates should be? He doesn’t bother to look past what’s on the outside to see her for who she is. And Elain is obviously repulsed by the idea that she should belong to anyone or have no choice in who she can be with. Azriel is her friend and the only person who sees her quiet strength. He has so much faith in her, in her abilities; he’s the one who kept her company when no one else did, he’s the only one who bothered to see her for more than her brokenness. You’re going to tell me you still prefer Elucien over Elriel?

The more I see Gwynriels that ship Elucien out of their hate for Elain, the less I can understand Elain stans that ship Elucien. Pls Elain has made it very clear that she doesn’t want Lucien, why would you ship her with him? Do you hate her too? Smh

The real question would be, if you care and understand Elain why would you ship her with Lucien (where she canonically shrinks when he is near)?

People crying over Helion and Lucien’s mom not getting to be with each other and her being forced into a relationship she didn’t want, but also ship Elucien? Just say you hate Elain

When Elain’s book is out, Gwyn stans will look like clowns and I will laugh because they set her up by shipping her with Azriel just because they hate Elain. Watch them play the victims now because Elriels are clapping back the hate they’ve sent towards Elain

As romantic as wanting girl who is visibly uncomfortable around a guy who caused her trauma to end up with the said guy. Guess their standards for romance are in hell

Category 2: Victimize Elain’s character

Gwynriels only want Gwyn with Azriel because they despise Elain

Gwyn stans and Gwynriels are Elain antis

No one in the books dislike Elain, so why are there so many people who do?

Elain hasn’t done anything wrong or questionable to warrant the hate she gets

Not having Elain’s POV makes it easy for people to be swayed a certain way about her character if you already don’t relate to her in some way

It’s been years since this series came out and we haven’t gotten a lick of an Elain POV, but people still hate her for what? We don’t know her thoughts, dreams, or aspirations

We haven’t even had Elain’s perspective yet and people are passing these judgments off on her

Elain antis who say she’s boring are just cruel when she has obvious symptoms of PTSD like Feyre and Nesta

Gwyn is one of the most overhyped characters and that’s only because most people hate Elain and they couldn’t wait to find a random girl to ship Azriel with

Nesta was abusive to her sisters but Elain (who has only ever been kind) is painted as the villain

From the text we know that Elain is the epitome of feminine stereotypes (gentle, gardening, baking, non confrontational for the most part). Yet people still call her boring or deny that she has any interesting character traits?

You can’t love Nesta and hate Elain

People hate Elain because of internalized misogyny and lack of taste. All the girl does is tend to her garden and mind her business and they treat her worse than Tamlin

Does Gwyn deserve all this support? Of course yes! She is amazing! But where’s that support when Elain was in the same situation as she? Where’s that support for her right now? Why do they idolize Gwyn for her interactions with Azriel and hate Elain for having any interaction with him?

It’s not even a ship war anymore, they just hate Elain

People hate Elain for no reason

Some of y’all don’t like feminine traits and it shows

We know less about Eris and Helion but people don’t call them boring. Why would rejecting femininity make Elain more interesting?

Elain has had a lot forced upon her

The main reason I believe most people love Gwyn so much is to get Azriel away from Elain. It’s not a secret that Elain has been a widely hated character for years so suddenly we get a new female who has a minimal amount of interactions with Azriel and BOOM. New ship that once again doesn’t make sense (just like Azriel x Emerie after ACOFAS)

Elain hasn’t done something so terrible for her to get this hate. At this point some of you are just being misogynistic and you don’t want to accept it. Don’t call yourselves feminists and then say bs like this, it’s embarrassing. She’s pretty and everyone agreed to hate on her

Just a personal feeling, but I feel like a lot of the Elain hate stems from internalized misogyny. That to be a strong female lead, you need to pick up a sword and fight. That to be strong, you need to adapt traditionally masculine traits

Elain is feminine. She is beautiful. She loves to bake and garden. She is docile, quiet, observant, and a people-pleaser. All traditionally feminine traits. Yet for some reason, she’s like the worst in these people’s eyes?

I think also maybe a lot of people can’t relate to her femininity? That her being so beautiful and quiet doesn’t allow for the people who dislike her not to self-insert? Most of the hate stems from people not wanting Elain to be with Azriel. It’s mean, but maybe the people who hate Elain literally just can’t self-insert if they have a story and that’s why they’re vehemently against it?

Poor Elain. The Cauldron dealt her a bad deal. Upon emerging as Fae, she is immediately declared by Lucien as his mate, never mind that she was already engaged to a prick. Her love life is not good

It blows my mind how they really think that they can compare all the shit that Elain gets with some dumb jokes about Gwyn on Twitter (and yes, the “hate” towards her started mostly because Elriels are clapping back, it was bound to happen)

I would think of it as anti-feminist with Elain and Lucien because she has consistently stated that she does not want him so if she was forced to embrace the bond that would be taking away her right to have a choice but with Az she feels comfortable around so if they were mates then Elain would be happy and feel safe which again should be the priority for women to feel safe in their relationships with anything and to not be forced into any type of situation aka the mating bond in this

Category 3: Coddle Elain’s character

Elain has value the way she is, in all her domestic girly glory. Not every character has to be badass

We don’t speak of Elain’s flaws frequently because everyone else already speaks badly of her, mainly in an unfair way

There is definitely something deeper going on with Elain but by no means will she ever be evil or any less feminine. That goes against everything we already know about her

It’s ok to critique Elain because she needs growth but y’all keep forgetting the shit her and her sisters went through

The last “bad” thing Elain did in ACOTAR was not help Feyre when they were impoverished and I’m tired of people acting like she’s a terrible character when it was their father’s responsibility. It happened 4 books ago and Feyre has forgiven both Nesta and Elain

Elain’s character and the evil Elain theory are a great example of the trend where people only consider female characters interesting if they reject femininity

We don’t know enough to hate Elain

Many people want Elain to turn evil (which in my opinion seems to come from a place of internalized misogyny)

However we don’t tend to talk about her faults, at least not publicly, as that has been, and still is, done to death, and I--personally, at least--find it much more fun to theorise about potentially interesting aspects of the overall plot, than dwell on negatives

And ultimately, I would be shocked if Elain has a more karmically-charged story than Nesta, considering that Elain’s “wrongs” are so much less severe and bad than Nesta’s, and Elain has already apologized for them (or paid the price in other ways, like through what Graysen did)

I guess I also think Elain has suffered and been punished enough. I hope her story is about finding hope in terrible situations, and learning to love her new life, and choosing her own path after everything that has been done to her. I don’t think she needs to be punished anymore or face any additional trauma

Also, why is she being judged on her decisions as a human at all? Fae are monsters to humans! They enslaved them for thousands of years, and the Wall was erected to keep them out

Like I’m sorry, but think Elain would want to leave her ONLY FAMILY AND FRIENDS for the Spring Court where she has no one because--oh look, lots of flowers!--is the craziest thing I have ever heard

Her sisters are in the Night Court. Her nephew is in the Night Court. Her closest friends (Nuala and Cerridwen) are in the Night Court. Her love interest is in the Night Court. Her extended family is in the Night Court. Her home is in the Night Court

SJM isn’t going to keep two sisters together and split up the third. Especially not keep Feyre and Nesta together and separate Elain. They were either all going to end up in separate places, or together. Not 2 here and 1 there

Compared to the other female characters in the series, Elain is the only character whose femalehood is at the center of conversations; this is because arguments in the Elriel fandom fixate on it when discussing her character. While Elain, Feyre, Nesta, and Mor are all representations of white womanhood and white beauty, Elain epitomizes the most fragile version of white womanhood. It’s easy to blame society’s perception of traditional female characters in comparison to non-traditional female characters when it comes to the discourse surrounding Elain’s character because it: falls in line with the fixation on Elain’s femalehood to silence opposing viewpoints; is a simplistic explanation that fails to tackle the underlying issues with Elain as a character, the same issues that are downplayed in-universe; absolves Elain of her wrongdoings; prevents the ACOTAR fandom from holding Elain accountable for her actions and inactions within the series; and diminishes the impact Elain’s actions and inactions have on those around her. It’s not that Elain is hated in the fandom because she’s a traditional female character; it’s the fact that arguments in the Elriel fandom deflect a critical analysis of Elain’s character because she’s a traditional female character who embodies the ideal white woman in need of protection. White fans and white-aligned fans of color, especially white women, have a tendency to vehemently defend, gatekeep, and coddle white female characters in fandom; this makes it difficult for other fans to engage in critical discussions about these white female characters because they’re viewed as flawless and all around perfect characters despite evidence to the contrary. Since Elain is viewed positively by the other characters in the series, it has rendered her character untouchable to any perceived slight or criticism in fandom discussions because those negative opinions challenge what has been said about her character thus far. And as a result, her character has been placed on a pedestal and implicitly hailed as the epitome of white womanhood; and when she’s criticized, it’s seen as a direct attack against white womanhood. Arguments in the Elriel fandom: exploit feminist language and perpetuate white feminist tactics under the guise of defending Elain’s character; center Elain in conversations about female oppression in the ACOTAR world and uphold white feminist ideologies in their critique of ACOTAR’s patriarchal society; and use the fragile white woman narrative to victimize Elain in Lucien’s presence, playing into racial biases that are associated with white supremacy’s defense of white womanhood.

Feminism is a social movement that seeks to promote equality and equity to all genders, and feminists work toward eradicating gender disparities on a macro-level, in addition to challenging gender biases on a micro-level. As feminism became more mainstream, a flat and oversimplified version of feminism emerged: mainstream feminism. The mainstream feminist movement is meant to represent all women, but rarely does it center conversations around issues that concern most women. The problem with mainstream feminism is that it’s just a popularized version of white feminism. White feminism has relied extensively on an individualized understanding of women’s oppression, exclusively from the lens of privileged white women. White feminism only focuses on the oppression experienced by white, able-bodied, affluent, educated, cishet women; and it views gender as the key mode of privileged white women’s oppression, isolated from the privileges granted by their other social identities. White women can be and are oppressed under the patriarchy but only because they are women; their identity as women does not exempt them from the privileges granted by their whiteness. The term white feminist does not mean any feminist who is white, but refers to feminists who prioritize the concerns of privileged white women as though they are representative of all women. However, the term is not exclusive to white people. Because white feminism is so pervasive, people of other racial and ethnic backgrounds often buy into white feminism, believing that if they work hard enough, they may be able to reap its rewards.

Just like white feminism, mainstream feminism only recognizes the identity of being a woman, assumes that all women share common experiences of gender oppression, fails to address other social identities in relation to overlapping systems of oppression, and disregards privilege in relation to various social identities. Just like white feminism, mainstream feminism is palatable because it doesn’t seek to challenge the systems in place, instead its goal is to succeed within them. Essentially, mainstream feminism and white feminism are extensions of performative feminism. Performative feminism is a type of performative activism that’s used to describe feminist views that are surface level and solely for the benefit of one type of person. It’s a pretense which often has nothing to do with genuine activism. Arguments in the Elriel fandom normalize and promote performative feminism because the topic of feminism is only referenced when discussing Elain. This indicates that these arguments are engaging in disingenuous discourse to push a personal agenda within the ACOTAR fandom, and it becomes more apparent when they use white feminist tactics to shut down opposing viewpoints:

White feminists weaponize and exploit feminist language to silence the opinions of other women, especially when they’re called out for their problematic behaviors

White feminists use the phrase “Women supporting women” to defend other white feminists who exhibit problematic behaviors instead of holding them accountable 

White feminists weaponize phrases like “Women supporting women” and “You just hate women” to attack other women who disagree with them on any given topic

White feminists use phrases like “All women face challenges” and “Stop pitting women against each other” to sidestep conversations about privilege

White feminists divert conversations away from privilege and towards the Trauma Olympics to equate their struggles to the oppression of marginalized people 

White feminists skirt around the realities of other forms of oppression and discrimination, downplaying the experiences of marginalized people

White feminists diminish or ignore the ways in which gender oppression affects other marginalized people

White feminists paint those they harmed as aggressive, mean, or divisive when confronted with the ways they have harmed a marginalized group

White feminists deflect criticism by focusing on the anger or emotions being expressed rather than the issue that is being discussed, invalidating the concerns of marginalized people

White feminists speak over marginalized voices in an attempt to sound “woke”

White feminists get defensive and insist there’s no way they could be a part of the problem because of what they’ve done to help marginalized groups already 

White feminists say they don’t see color in an attempt to obscure racial issues that need to be addressed

White feminists center and victimize themselves in conversations about racism, which derails necessary conversations from taking place

White feminists who are white weaponize the intersectionality of their race and gender to avoid accountability

Feminism is not meant to be approached from an individualistic perspective nor is it only about addressing the experiences of privileged white women, it involves addressing the intersections of race, class, gender, sexuality, (dis)ability, and other social identities as well; and it involves addressing how these social identities relate to privilege. Moreover, feminism is not about women upholding complete loyalty to other women because of a shared gender identity, and to claim that it does implies that women should be held to different emotional standards than men. If men are able to dislike and criticize other individual men, real or fictional, without their characters being compromised, why aren’t women granted that same privilege?

It’s clear that SJM set up the ACOTAR world to mirror a patriarchal society, and that the imbalance of power between males and females stems from sexism. Arguments in the Elriel fandom analyze the ACOTAR world through a feminist lens to show how ACOTAR’s patriarchal society, to which the mating bond is innately tied, contributes to female oppression and limits their agency. When choice and free will are emphasized as part of Elain’s arc, they imply that Elain, through the mating bond, experiences female oppression under ACOTAR’s patriarchal society because of her identity as a female with that identity being the focal point of her oppression in the world. Elain is one of the most privileged characters in the ACOTAR world: she’s High Fae; she’s the sister of the High Lord and High Lady of the Night Court, which gives her access to wealth and political influence because of that connection; she’s able-bodied; she was magically blessed by the Cauldron; and she lives in Velaris, a place that grants females autonomy and power because of the beliefs of Rhysand and Feyre. Arguments in the Elriel fandom trivialize female oppression in the ACOTAR world because they disregard the fact that Elain’s privileges prevent her from experiencing female oppression in the same way that other marginalized females in the world do. The mating bond being one such example because those around Elain are not forcing the bond on her, instead they’re allowing Elain to reach a decision about the bond for herself; a privilege that other marginalized females in the world probably wouldn’t have. Just because Elain has endured hardships in her life and is a female in a patriarchal society, they do not erase the privileges she holds within the ACOTAR world. The failure to include Elain’s privileges in discussions about Elain being a female in a patriarchal society feeds into white feminist ideologies because white feminism operates from a very narrow perspective; it doesn’t take other intersecting identities into account when it examines gender oppression, leaving no room for discussions about privilege (or lack thereof) in relation to those intersecting identities. When discussing oppression in hierarchical societies, it’s imperative that privilege is also included in the conversation because privilege and oppression are not mutually exclusive; they equally affect the ways in which people navigate those societies through their social identities.

Rather than attributing Elain’s uncomfortability to her new life as a Fae female or the mating bond itself and her trauma to the Cauldron, the King of Hybern, or Ianthe, they’re placed on Lucien to cast his character in a negative light. Moreover, fandom discussions portray Lucien as a possessive character to further emphasize Elain’s discomfort despite the inaccuracy of this characterization in canon. Arguments in the Elriel fandom play into racial biases when it comes to Lucien (a male character of color) because they mischaracterize his character in order to victimize Elain (a white female character), placing her character in the role of the white damsel in distress. In Western society, the concept of womanhood has been conceptualized from a Eurocentric perspective with femininity and feminine attributes favoring white women. It’s the idea that a certain type of femininity is only inherent to white women as they are seen as the embodiment of an ideal womanhood. White womanhood has been a symbol of innocence and purity, and white women have been viewed as fragile beings in need of protection. The reason white womanhood functions within white supremacy is because it’s the same idea that has motivated white men to kill and beat black and brown men. The so-called protection of white women has been used as a justification for the horrific violence committed by white men because black and brown men were stereotyped as aggressive and seen as a threat to the virtue of white women. The white damsel in distress trope considered white women as worthy of protection because of their perceived innocence and purity; women of color were not granted that same treatment because they did not fit into the ideal image of womanhood. Over the years, this trope became a means for white women to exercise limited power in a patriarchal society with white women weaponizing their status as the damsel much to the detriment of black and brown men. It’s through the white damsel in distress trope that white supremacy sustains its dominance in Western society. The misrepresentation of characters of color in fandom, the dismissal of their importance to the overall story, and using them as tools in arguments centered around white characters are the foundation of fandom racism; they’re examples of how racism moves silently in fandom spaces. Instead of examining their behavior and taking constructive criticism from fans of color, white fans will often double down on their bigotry and center their uncomfortability in the conversation when confronted with their complicity in fandom racism. White fans expect fans of color to swallow fandom racism in its many forms in order to not ruin the experience of fandom, dismissing the fact that racism is prevalent in nearly every aspect of society. This mentality ensures that no one is held accountable for the harm they caused and alienates fans of color in fandom spaces.

To reiterate what I mentioned in my first think piece: terms like “oppression”, “the right to choose”, “feminist”, “feminism”, “anti-feminist”, “anti-feminism”, “internalized misogyny”, “misogyny”, “misogynist”, “sexist”, “sexism”, “racist”, “racism”, “classist”, “classism”, “discrimination”, and “patriarchy” are all used in specific ways to draw attention to the plight of marginalized people and challenge those who deny the existence of systems of oppression. Yet these words and their meanings can be twisted to attack, exclude, and invalidate people with differing opinions on any given topic. When social justice and feminist terms are thrown around antagonistically and carelessly to push a personal agenda, it becomes clear that these terms are being used to engage in disingenuous discourse and pursue personal validation rather than being used out of any deep-seated conviction to dismantle systemic oppression. Being an ally, activist, or feminist is not an identity, it’s a practice. It requires: ongoing self-reflection; holding ourselves accountable; listening to marginalized people; educating ourselves; dismantling implicit biases; challenging those around us who are exhibiting problematic behaviors; and action behind our words.

It’s important to be aware of the language that is used within the fandom when defending or critiquing characters and ships. It’s also important to question how an argument is framed and why it’s framed the way that it is to critically examine the intent behind that argument: is it used as a tool to push a personal agenda that reinforces problematic behaviors, or is it used as an opportunity to share, learn, enlighten, and educate?

-----------

Tagging: @spell-cleavers @bookofmirth @m0bulidae @ilya-boltagon

[anachronistic-falsehood]

While you personally don’t want to write an essay in the tags of my post, vis-a-vis Cronus Dynamics, how about writing one here?

Genuinely really interested in hearing your thoughts!

-Nekropsii

I accidentally deleted this ask from my inbox somehow but I saved the post to my drafts beforehand, so hopefully this still posts the way it should! @nekropsii

Everybody sit down because I’m gonna learn you a thing about Cronus Ampora.

Basically, when looking at Cronus and his dynamic within the dancestors, we're need to start by taking a long gander at our first interaction with him and pick apart his character in general.

First thing he does is try to flirt with Meenah, and badly. Which at first glance is just... fine. He's a parallel to Eridan's failed love life, but he's much more overconfident with it. He's arrogant; this is the very first character trait of his we're introduced to. And Meenah's reaction to him sounds like she's used to it. This is NOT the first time Cronus has tried to make a move on her, and it will NOT be the last.

He hammers in this idea that he's royalty but he's still this "cool, progressivwe, easy going dude." However, by trying to push the point that he doesn't care that he's royalty, he just keeps bringing it up. He puts himself on such a high pedestal for just being, and he thinks everyone else holds him up on that same pedestal, while denying that he put himself on the pedestal in the first place. He believes he deserves something for just existing. He calls everyone else "8ROKEN," "freaks," "rejects," which pushes forward the idea that he's somehow better than them. He claims that he listens to people and cares about them, but that is directly contradicted in the things he says about everyone else. He's entitled and a huge hypocrite.

He insists that he's "sensitivwe" and deserves someone to pity him for that, but it's a straight up lie. Cronus is NOT as sensitive as he claims. He tries to open up to Meenah about feeling like a human, but even during that conversation, he keeps making passes at her. He's not sensitive; he uses his "sensitive artistic nice guy" persona to attempt to manipulate people. He's without a doubt, manipulative, even though he's not that good at it when it comes to Meenah.

When interacting with Meenah, Cronus is a nuisance at worst. Meenah is above him on the hemospectrum and doesn't display any obvious disabilities that would make her easy to mess with. She's nearly invincible to him. His demeanour changes, however, when he interacts with Mituna.

Mituna is a) lower on the hemospectrum, and b) displays clear symptoms of disabilities, making him vulnerable. And the first thing Cronus does is make fun of him.

Cronus mocks Mituna, and then immediately launches into what could easily be interpreted as sexual harassment. Cronus claims that he listens to people, but he doesn't do that with Mituna. We can't see what's physically going on, but Mituna keeps telling Cronus to stop touching him and he gets no reaction. Cronus compliments and insults Mituna in the same breath, under the assumption that Mituna can't understand what's being said but he still tries to flirt with him regardless. He keeps trying to push himself into some sort of quadrant with Mituna despite the fact that Mituna very clearly does not want that. Cronus even convinces Mituna that the "weird touching" is just a friendly thing.

When talking to Mituna after Meenah leaves, Cronus even admits that he only says "sorry" and acts pitiable in order to get girls to like him more. He calls Mituna a "mustardblood," insults his relationship with Latula, and even says that he would have killed Mituna himself if Beforus had the same culling system as Alternia. As soon as Meenah, someone of a higher caste, isn't around, the mask comes off. After she's back and his "pitiable soft boy" act has been revealed, Cronus threatens to spread word that he's going to off himself for sympathy points. Yikes.

Cronus shows his true colours around Mituna, which begs the question: how the fuck does this man interact with the other trolls of his group?

We more or less know how he acts around Kankri. Kankri validates whatever feelings Cronus has, so of course Cronus isn't going to get that pissed off at him. We also don't get much mention of Kurloz, aside from the fact that Kurloz doesn't pay him much attention.

Cronus' dynamic within his group of trolls and the Sgrub session they played is widely up to interpretation. I could probably get into Cronus' classpect, blood caste, etc. and the Amporas' foils againt Jake English as Hope-bound players, but I feel like that would deserve its own post, so I'm going to get right into his dynamic within the dancestors, and why the fandom's erasure of his negative traits does his character a disservice.

The dancestors are... an interesting group of people. Their interests and traits vary wildly. In the Ministrife is the only place where we really get to see more of them interact in the same conversation, and even then it's a clusterfuck.

In my opinion, the most antagonistic characters in their group are Damara, Meenah, and Cronus. I won't talk much about Damara, because I don't feel qualified to talk about her at length, but in short, Meenah provoked everyone until Damara went off the handle, leading to Meenah's own death and a number of other things. Everyone else was so caught up in their own personal problems that playing the game was far from first priority. Meenah and Damara caused most of the problems in the game itself, but most of the personal issues were caused by simple conflicts of interest and misunderstandings. However, despite how little we actually know about how Cronus was during their session, there's ample reason to believe he caused a lot of interpersonal conflicts, which in turn contributed to the overall dysfunctionality of their session.

Cronus has absolutely no boundaries. He will flirt with anything that moves, shown in the Ministrife when he makes a pass at Tavros and even asks Eridan out (gross). The two characters Cronus seems to be the most hooked on are Meenah and Mituna, although there could be others; these are just the only two we've seen him have extended conversations with. Cronus alludes to interfering with Mituna's moirallegiance with Kurloz in order to attempt to jam himself into one of Mituna's quadrants. He also shows himself to be slightly jealous of Mituna concerning his relationship with Latula, as Cronus claims she could do better and implies that he would be a better option than Mituna, or even that he could fill Mituna's flushed quadrant instead. Cronus is hypocritical, entitled, arrogant, and manipulative, and when we group those traits in with the people he seems to be involved with the most, it's safe to assume a few things regarding his dynamic with the others during their session.

a) He likely flirted with Meenah all throughout their game, despite her repeated rejection.

b) He possibly tried to wedge himself between Latula and Mituna to get with either one of them (maybe both), and maybe even tried to do the same between Mituna and Kurloz.

c) He was not well liked.

Along with the Damra/Rufioh/Horuss situation and the Kurloz/Meulin situation, Cronus' godawful flirting towards Meenah, Mituna, and possibly Latula and Kurloz made the entire session a romantic mess and kept a large focus on everyone's complicated relationship problems with one another. Cronus is a perfect catalyst to mess with the only functional relationships within the session, being Mituna/Latula and Mituna/Kurloz.

Cronus is a shit-stirrer who ignores boundaries and pushes people, especially Mituna and Meenah, to their limits. He could very well be part of the reason why no one was focused on playing the game and was instead fixated on their own relationships. Maybe things would have turned out differently for Mituna in particular if Cronus wasn't constantly on him about his matespritship with Latula or his moirallegiance with Kurloz. Maybe they could have figured out a way to win if he hadn't distracted some of the only people who were in stable enough relationships to play the game well. Cronus alludes to him and Mituna being friends before Mituna's accident, which might be why he's so bitter and angry about his relationship status with Mituna now. Cronus is obsessed with Mituna's quadrants and is desperate to be in one of them because he sees Mituna as an easy catch; they were friends once, so he should theoretically be able to get back to that point in their relationship, and now Mituna is disabled which makes it easier for Cronus to manipulate and take advantage of him.

There are perhaps some sympathetic traits to Cronus, if you've got a shovel and you're ready to dig for them. His flirting could be a desperate cry for help due to his crippling loneliness. His humankin issues could be him reworking his shattered dreams of being a wizard and a hero into something he understands better, now that he's met some of the humans and seen how powerful they are with their god tier powers. His hope for being something greater than what he is has long since been destroyed, so he's likely projecting onto them in order to gain some sense of belonging in a group where he's alienated and lonely. The greaser persona could be a wall of false confidence to cover up the insecurities he holds. He could be verbally bullying the others in order to try making himself feel better in comparison.

But... that's no excuse for his actions. He straight up admits that he abuses Mituna. He violates people's boundaries with no care for how they might feel.

That's also why it puts me off when people put Cronus and Mituna in a kismesissitude. Cronus is obsessed with Mituna to an unsettling degree. Despite how lowly he thinks of Mituna, he is set on being in one of his quadrants, and it's not healthy. A kismesissitude is built off of mutual respect, competition, and rivalry, not disdain, abuse, and obsession. It's entirely possible that when they were friends, Cronus thought their relationship was headed towards a quadrant, then Mituna filled both quadrants that Cronus was potentially aiming for, leaving Cronus bitter and fixating on Mituna as a whole. That could very well be what happened; it's not canon, but judging from context clues, it's a very big possibility. But even if that's true, this shouldn't frame Cronus as some sad angtsy heartbroken man; he's obsessive and arrogant. Even if he did end up in a quadrant with Mituna, it would not go how he wants it to go.

We'll never know exactly how Cronus interacted with everyone in his group and exactly how his actions contributed to the fate of their session. But that's why I like speculating about it! Cronus is such an interesting character, which is why I hate it when people try to erase his negative aspects in order to make him seem more likeable. He's not supposed to be likeable; he's supposed to be an asshole! He's an antagonistic, bitchy, desperate guy who's got a lot of issues he's unwilling to work through in order to actually improve as a person. He adds something interesting to the alpha trolls' session if you're willing to dive deep and explore his dynamics.

I'm not saying people can't like Cronus. I fucking love Cronus. He's a toxic person who's incapable of change because he won't let himself change. He is a bitch and I love to hate him. When people erase his negative traits, they just create a whole new character and slap Cronus' name and face on it. It erases the abuse Mituna goes through and a lot of the interesting (but unhealthy) dynamics he has with others. People take away the interesting parts of his character and leave him as a woobified angtsy sad boy who's pitch-pining for Mituna and flushed-pining for Kankri, when that's not at all who Cronus is. The fandom does his character a disservice by mischaracterizing him this way.

TLDR: Cronus is a bitch and I love him so much (derogatory)

[themagicians-girl]

Sun Through The Houses

Sun in the 1st house: 

People notice these individuals because they are leaders and exude confidence. They are unapologetically themselves at all times regardless of where they are or who they are around. It is easy for these individuals to gain respect for this reason. On the other hand, others can envy this and display jealousy or hatred for them. You can often find people with their sun in the first house on the stage whether that be in a leadership position in the workplace, at a theater, or in front of a camera. These people shine and they do so, usually, gracefully. These individuals hold themselves in a proud and dignified way, and expect those around them to do the same. They put much emphasis on their appearance. This does not necessarily mean their looks but mostly how the carry themselves. They will never show up in a wrinkled shirt or with smelly breath. They must appear presentable at all times, because they are opportunists and they want to be ready for anything.   On the dark side, they must watch out for their egotistical and domineering tendencies. 

Sun in the 2nd house:

These individuals strive for pleasure and comfort. They like to own nice things - whatever that means for them individually. Because of the need for possession these people can become workaholics. They may work long hours or strive to be very financially set. Actually, when these people are struggling financially expect them to become severely depressed. They cannot fathom living paycheck to paycheck, its their biggest fear. When these people aren’t at work you can often find them at a restaurant or hanging out at home, which, by the way, their home will be their safe space and very comfortable. They may struggle to leave the home, or with moving in general. These people grow very attached to their home base. They may move out of their parents home older than most, or, if the childhood was chaotic, leave as quickly as possible to find the security they are craving. Sun in the 2nd house people enjoy food A LOT. Cooking them a nice meal is the way to their heart. They are usually good cooks themselves. On the dark side, be mindful of your materialistic nature. It’s okay to believe in things that aren’t only tangible. You don’t need to work 24/7. Money comes and goes. Embrace change, and remember that nothing in the universe is solely ours. Father may have put a lot of emphasis on career growing up, also may have been overbearing and put a lot of pressure on the child.

Sun in the 3rd house:

These people love to learn and travel. They live for it. They are the types to buy a rundown bus, throw a mattress in it, and travel the country. They don’t care for materialistic possessions, they just wish to seek endless knowledge. Actually, they need to be mentally stimulated at all times. Which may cause mental anxiety at times because they do not know how to slow down, rest, and recharge. These people may be good at trivia, because they know a little about everything. If aspects are positive, will have a solid relationship with siblings. You can find these people listening to podcasts, at the library, reading, or watching documentaries. Most likely the podcasts though, because they like to be on the move. Expect these people to travel often. If they don’t have the means to travel, they will immerse themselves in travel any other way they can via; movies, events, stories, friends, etc. Could be excellent teachers if they can develop patience, something they struggle with. Skills to develop: dig deeper into your passions, not just surface level. Stick with hobbies and projects longer, see them through. How many unfinished projects do you have right now? 

Sun in the 4th:

These people have an attachment to their family whether it be good or bad, its there and prevalent in their life. They are always pulled to the family, away or towards. If aspects were negative, they may have had an abusive father who stifled their growth or did not allow them to be who they truly wanted to be. If aspects were good, they probably have a very good relationship with the father. May really want children or at least, a solid family structure (family can mean anything). These people are nurturing, kind, and empathetic souls. They enjoy feeling embraced and cared for, and will make you feel the same. They are very proud of those they consider family and are protective of them. These individuals may work in settings where they serve others in one way or another. People trust them. Be mindful not to become possessive of those you hold closest to you, and if you’re struggling with the family, it’s okay to get help for that. 

Sun in the 5th: 

Some of the most creative people you will ever meet. They love the arts and creative adventures. They are most likely involved in art in some form, whether that be singing, modeling, painting, or photography. These individuals have what it takes to entice an audience, and they do all of the time. Many admirers. May struggle to chose a long term partner due to enjoying attention from many. Sun in the 5th house people have many friends and people will admire them. They are gregarious and full of life. They love to party and have a good time. They aren’t the type to spent much time alone. They’d prefer to be out adventuring or creating with others. Probably love children and children probably love them too. These people are very vocal, it’s hard to miss them. They may love makeup, and put a lot of effort into their looks. They can charm others. On the dark side, be weary of leading people on or being too full of yourself. Ask yourself, do you really like that person, or do you like the attention they are giving you? It’s okay to share the spotlight with others. You will find support when you give support.

Sun in the 6th:

These people throw themselves into work and serving others. They spent a majority of their time at work, and find it hard to take vacations or relax. May have an emphasis on nutrition or working out, may take those aspects of life too far and struggle with self-esteem. These individuals are often selfless and caring. They are excellent friends. They are practical rather than emotional in their approach to life. May have had a parent that was overbearing and expected them to be perfectionists which developed into anxiety and indecision in adulthood. Lack of trust for oneself. These people are good at tending to things. They are the type to find a stray animal and take it home and nurture it. They are fixers in all aspects of life. Should their chart have positive aspects to the sun, they will take good care of their physical and mental health and will inspire others to do the same. On the dark side, your career is not a personality trait. Develop skills and passions outside of work, or you will bore others crazy. It’s okay to relax and experience pleasure.

Sun in the 7th: 

Expect these people to have a close circle of people very dear to them. They strive for interpersonal relationships. It makes them feel whole. Other people, make them feel whole. Which can teeter on negative or positive, depending how much independence the person has acquired. Regardless, these individuals know how to make connections. They may have many acquaintances. They strive for balance and harmony in life. They may work in fields where they act as a mediator of some sorts, such as counseling. When the Sun is in the 7th house of one on one relationships, these people will struggle to distinguish themselves between their own self and others. They must work hard to maintain boundaries for themselves or they will run themselves too thin. These people are empathetic, caring, and selfless. They will be the most support friend and lover. They are excellent communicators and can make two of the worst enemies find an understanding. They are respected for their diplomacy. 

Sun in the 8th:

Regardless if the Sun is in an extroverted sign such as Leo or Gemini, people with 8th house Suns will appear quieter and more private. Much of their personality is hidden and they only show it to those they trust. These people may appear distant, without trying. They just feel hard to reach. These people enjoy what is hidden. They may have secret hobbies or passions. May have obsessive tendencies and struggle with depression. May live a double lifestyle. Dark humor. If aspects to the sun are negative, may have lost the father during childhood in someway. These people are excellent detectives. They love uncovering the mysteries around them, especially other peoples mysteries. You can’t hide anything from Sun in the 8th people, and if you do, they will feel betrayed and never trust you again. Trust is big for these people. May have few friends, but the friends they do have will last a lifetime. May dabble with the occult or darker aspects of life such as taboo, kink, witchcraft, etc. Dark sense of humor.

Sun in the 9th house:

These individuals put much emphasis on personal development. They want to endlessly search for knowledge and to become the best person they can be. They would prefer to be intelligent above anything else. These people make excellent teachers. They want to travel or live in foreign countries. Father may be of a  vastly different nationality to mother or was born elsewhere. These individuals are interested in history, law, philosophy, and language. May speak multiple languages. May have friends that live all over the world. These people are expansive and want to adventure the world. They feel they must in order to fulfill their life purpose. They need independence and freedom from others. They enjoy mentally stimulating conversations. If they can learn something new from you, they will respect you.

Sun in the 10th house:

Individuals with their sun in the 10th house are easy to spot. They will be in a position of power or will be in the spotlight somehow. They strive to be in the public eye. They are leaders and want to live a life of fame. They want to be known and respected. They usually deserve the roles they achieve because they are hard workers. They have much to teach others regarding chasing success and dreams. Very rarely will you meet a Sun in the 10th person that isn’t chasing a dream of some sort. These individuals need to have goals to work towards. Complacency is not their friend. When they aren’t being productive they may become depressed. A struggle for people with their Suns in the 10th is that, although they want admiration, they struggle to have meaningful relationships with others. Relationships may rely on business partnerships rather than a true bond. Don’t abuse your power or sell your soul in search of it. Fame is nothing compared to genuine care and love. Balance.

Sun in the 11th:

People with their Sun in the 11th house have booked schedules for months in advance. They are always attending events, workshops, or traveling. They are involved in many organizations whether that be community outreach, clubs, committees, or social circles. They want to be surrounded by people and community. These individuals bring friends together and can introduce many people to one another. They feel most whole when they belong to a group. You can expect them to have many acquaintances and friends. On the downside, their romantic relationships may struggle because they want to spend all of their free time with friends. Must achieve independence from their groups. May be great planners and organizers. Eccentric and unique people. May struggle to understand who they are apart from others. 

Sun in the 12th: 

These individuals are sensitive idealists. They love animals and taking care of vulnerable people, because they feel vulnerable them self. These people often get stuck in a daydream or fantasy world. They can struggle to ground themselves in the present moment because of this. Psychic intuition. Escapist tendencies due to feeling like the world is too harsh. Must work to develop thicker skin. Usually extremely creative and artistic because they hide away so often into their own world. May be quieter individuals or introverted. They enjoy one on one interactions or smaller groups to a big crowd. May have very vivid dreams. Can easily read others emotions. May be prone to wearing rose colored glasses. Father may have been aloof or not in the childs life. Be mindful of substance abuse or manipulating others when you feel threatened. 

As always, look at your chart as a whole.

Love,

Jaclyn