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tearsriccoslay · 3 months

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And goodbye's so much harder 'cause we were happy...

Warnings: Major Character death, overall theme of death

July 10th, 794 words

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/57264340

James would be lying if he said he wasn't scared shit-less. He knew Regulus was right. He didn’t have to do that. He probably shouldn't have. He would have been fine. But he had to go and be the hero trying to save a restaurant full of people from an angry man. Seeing the look in Regulus’ eyes as he ran over was something he would never wish on anyone. The sheer horror he could sense behind them was bone chilling. Oh, how he could look into his eyes forever and ever, but not like this. He’s never seen such a loss of light in them. He saw the police speaking to Regulus, trying to usher him away, but James spoke up. ”Let him stay. Please.” he said weakly. If today was the day that he took his last breath, he was going to spend it telling Regulus he loved him. And he knew that the chances of today being his last were only climbing as time kept on. He was going to spend every last second he had by his side, even if it killed him faster. He couldn't live without him. Not his Regulus. James knew how far away the hospital was, which meant the ambulance would be a while. With the way he slowly began to grow cold; shivering, he knew his time was growing short. ”My star,” He said, squeezing Regulus’ hand 3 times with the little strength he had. ”I love you more than life.” He smiled, trying desperately to stay strong for Regulus. ”I love you so much. I want you to know that.“ He would tell Regulus that everything was fine, but he knows it's not. He’s not a wonderful liar either, nor would he lie to Regulus. That’s the last thing he’d do, even though… these moments are the last things he’ll do.

"I know I know, stop talking that way, you're going to be okay." James heard Regulus beg him, but he knew the truth. "Regulus, please." James gave him a look. It would be easier on him if he realized it now, instead of later. Because later would be too late. James has already accepted his fate, it's just a matter of it fulfilling itself now. "I need you to promise me something, okay?" His voice was practically a whisper now, and shaky. He was terrified. He knew death was about to overcome him, but it didn't calm his nerves at all like the stories he hears of people. He wishes he could be like Remus in this sense. He was one of the bravest people he knew. Even in the face of death Remus could keep his shit together, and now here James was, lying on the ground next to Regulus, his fingers going numb and trying not to let his heart beat too fast in fear that it would stop too soon. "I need you to be strong. For yourself and for Sirius. I need you to be okay. I'll be with you no matter what, I promise." As much as he could feel himself practically being pulled away from reality, he felt his heart slow, almost like a sense of relaxation though he knew it wasn't. This was it. He felt a tear fall down by his temple, trying his best to ration his breathing for as long as he could. He heard the murmurs of everyone around him grow quieter, and that was when it really, really set in. He was in a battle with death, and he was losing very quickly. "Keep burning, my star." He whispered, barely even audible, and he prayed to every god above that Regulus heard. He prayed that Regulus would be safe, and okay. He prayed that Sirius would be okay. He prayed that his parents would be okay. That anyone he ever knew and loved would be okay. As he took his last breath, not once did he wonder if he would be okay. Not even a blink of such a thought crossed his mind. He looked into Regulus' eyes as he felt his vision growing darker; blurrier and losing himself in them for the last time. Really losing himself now. He savored it for as long as possible, his own thoughts growing quieter and quieter. In the face of death, he didn't feel like a hero at all. Heroes didn't die like this and abandon people. Heroes didn’t abandon their spouses. It wasn't fair.

Suddenly, he went limp and life left his eyes as quickly as this had all happened.

For the first time, James Potter was silent. Un-moving. And he would stay that way for eternity. The sun went dark, but his star was still burning. That was all that mattered.

#jegulus #harry potter marauders #marauders #james potter #regulus black #sirius black #remus lupin #character death #dead gay wizards #the marauders #jegulus microfic #starchaser #sunseeker #james x regulus

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