thesolarcreature

[thesolarcreature]

We're back baby!!

I haven't been active for a while cos life be crazy bro... Gonna try be more active 😎

-Admin 1

[thesolarcreature]

I'm always shocked to see those 'reworded posts', and furthermore - upon seeing the brazen confidence they're presented with??

I know lots of people in this space are mean; often worse than that. I can recognise that many people participating in this.. trend ^... are probably hurt for good reason. Both sides do it.

But it seems spite has clouded our judgement.

Spite: a desire to hurt, annoy, or offend someone.

Dear (pro-)endos condoning reword-blogs etc.:

I was anti-endo, as recently as this year. Reword-blogs were a factor... because their goal is typically to violate peoples' boundaries/DNI, or just to twist their words... especially if your views directly contradict.

Many anti-endos won't humour this behaviour with so much as a second glance. I used to hate-browse them, to reinforce my belief that the endo community is nothing but bad eggs. Engaging in real dialogues with endos is what dissipated that belief.

If you're capable of rewording a post, you can compose your own.

And I promise you... if your goal is to represent your community, to facilitate learning and understanding...

You are so much better off just doing your own thing. Dx

-Admin 2

Since apparently I have to say this again;

It's not okay to take an anti endo's post, copy it word for word, then post it again on your blog with maybe a few words changed just to make it "endo safe".

You are not being "inclusive" when you do that. You are talking over CDD systems and making our issues and experiences about endos.

When you hear anti endos say that endos are making our experiences about them, this is exactly when we mean by that. Even if it's far from every endo doing it, it's still a common thing, and it still is received well. This is still a thing a lot of (pro) endos support.

We're allowed to make posts about our experiences and not include endos in that. We can post about our experiences specifically. Just like (pro) endos are allowed to do the opposite.

CDD systems are allowed to talk about CDD experiences. We're allowed to be anti endo. We're allowed to have endos on our DNIs.

If you're going to make safe spaces for endos, do it without stealing from other systems. Make your own posts and stop snatching every anti endo post you see and copy and pasting it just because you don't believe we deserve spaces without endos. If you do that, you are giving us anti endos more of a reason to not like endos. You're doing nothing but making (pro) endos look like assholes.

-Milkyway

[thesolarcreature]

TW

Didn't connect those dots...

it breaks my heart every time. Lots of them have been sold that continuously delving into these ideas will 'up the ante' of their healing, self-acceptance...

Meanwhile, preds are flooding the adjacent communities because they're well aware.

The kids aren't at fault.

I wish I had listened when I was younger; just cut myself off from the filth online.

I ignored all the same advice I give now.

It felt so urgent, but now, I realise there genuinely was no rush and it's so much better as an adult. Safety is a tangible feeling.

If I could take it back, I would.

-Admin 2

Anybody else notice that most proshippers are 13-17 so that would mean they were the targets of Elsa Gate videos

[thesolarcreature]

Barn Owls

Photos by Ryan Bourbour

[thesolarcreature]

I've had the displeasure of knowing someone very similar to the aforementioned ex-fiance...

Fuck the lot of them :)

So many survivors of CSA & grooming have pointed out that fiction did affect their abusers' reality and actions, and therefore, impacted them too. Imo anyone denying it "affects reality" is lying or wilfully ignorant!

Other adults see you & know what you're doing. /nbh

-Admin 2

Nah but I actually get such fucking violent thoughts when I come across pro shippers and they start interacting with my shit. I hope they all fucking die <3

Me and you in a room together, let's fucking go

[thesolarcreature]

Syscourse!

The ANON ask feature is BROKEN

Anons are not supposed to have icons attached. When they do it is latching on to OTHER user's blogs.

This has been tested by multiple people. There is a post discussing it. Here

DO NOT HARASS the blogs being latched to these messages. Anons are STILL anons. This glitch is now well documented to show the icons are NOT belonging to the ask sender.

If a post says anon, trust the people who are saying that wasn't them. Do not harass these blogs. I am begging you.

[thesolarcreature]

Hey, I've been through similar situations. This was a while ago & I'm an adult now (just fyi). Over 20

It's hard to find words for the impact of grooming, but off the top of my head: you're not in the wrong. I can relate to you in feeling this self-hate for having trusted the wrong people. You're so much more than what she put you through.

I've been worried lately, about some of these online groups. I could see the potential for harm, especially with the damage I know was caused by disorganised & hidden predators in the past 10 years alone. They aren't going unnoticed.

This open-book approach where they publicly brandish their "contact" status... is simply a cohort of wolves in sheeps' clothing.

I also see evidence for long-term efforts of normalisation. What you experienced is real. It starts and ends with them, they never should've brought this shit to you & you're not at fault.

I'm new to Tumblr ngl, but if you ever want to contact me / reblog further about this just go for it / let me know.

Even if we are different & our lived-with impacts are too, I can relate to feeling not fully understood. You matter & their bullshit will never be yours, even if you can still smell it for now... Whoever you have become after persevering through this.

-Admin 2

I just need to get something off of my chest that's been driving me mad. Something that's destroyed my life in a horrific way and it almost feels like nobody can ever understand me.

I was groomed into thinking I was a paraphile. I was groomed into accepting being in a space with more paraphiles. I was groomed by a woman almost a decade older than me in the group. Others also attempted to groom me. The woman who brought me into the group met me when I was a teenager but legal, she's seen my nudes and I've seen hers. I'm scared she still has them.

She promised me it was all anti-contact that they were just. People with disorders who wanted help. But they slowly showed me the truth and slowly tried to make more and more seem okay.

I hate myself so so much for ever trusting her. She used me. She purposefully groomed me so she could get off to the idea of me and her doing things that I would've never even been okay with expressing as fantasies. She wanted me to fuck her corpse. She convinced me it would be good or at least okay morally.

I feel disgusting.

I just need to talk to someone anyone who's experienced something like this... Please

[thesolarcreature]

I can be shaped by more than the things that hurt me

[thesolarcreature]

Reminder that DID, like every mental illness, is on a very wide spectrum. There's such a strange emphasis in the community on stuff being a "DID thing" vs an "OSDD thing" or it's "P-DID actually". People get wrapped up trying to catagorize themselves when it really actually has no tangible benefit to you. Therapists make the distinction to formulate their therapy approach, but to you, the system, it makes no difference. Going "oh but I just have OSDD not DID" does nothing to help you cope, recover, or process your symptoms. Your symptoms are your symptoms regardless of if they're following these arbitrary lines in the sand. You and your system should be focused on healing, not on what checkbox in a book you fit best.

[thesolarcreature]

I have the least issues with r/DID!

That is to say, as an observer...

I wouldn't post there today, too many Reddit users are looking to generate content off the backs of genuine people. "Cringe" fanatics and so on.

Back when I was first looking into potentially having a mental health disorder, visiting r/DID helped me. It was one of the very last steps in my process. I was already as sure as I could be that I needed professional help for this.

I found direct lived experiences of posters, many of whom stated that they're diagnosed w/DID; coping techniques and advice from their therapy journeys for shared experiences which I couldn't have imagined others had in common!

I read about familiar experiences I just couldn't get into words.

I applied several techniques like journaling; art; and just a little meditation (was meaning to get into that anyway). I saw benefits from these so quickly - they've been reliable tools for me since.

The overall vibe was one of growth and acceptance. It's rare that I feel comfortable posting anywhere, let alone Reddit, but I actually asked some questions and got useful answers. Not to mention encouragement to look after myself.

I would fact check the advice and it always came up clean! Usually, I easily found verifiable backing for what they'd said. I'm sure these users took care to conduct themselves in such a way.

When I log into current-day system social media spaces, I feel that we are missing several aspects which, personally, made my r/DID experience so positive. The focus has shifted for a huge percentage of us. I wonder what it's like to end up here now, with the state we're in.

I honestly find it hard to look at sometimes.

-Admin 2

Leave a comment or reblog as to why

[thesolarcreature]

[thesolarcreature]

People are trying to bring back 1880s-era anti-ASL sentiment. Worst timeline.

[thesolarcreature]

I agree strongly. As a p/wDID, I used to be angry at created systems for reasons unrelated to them. I kept it to myself because it did seem unfair, and after reading up on the topic I no longer have that issue.

With a broader perspective I can see it's as silly as comparing anything with mental health or apples and oranges... Feeling able to say this has been hard, having seen how polarising this topic is in the CDD community. I don't identify as a system nor plural, so the only group I consider myself part of would be CDDs / DID.

But I can't pretend to still be angry. And I can't take back what I've learned.

I don't really like labels. I'm not pro-, neutral-, nor anti- endo. I just want to keep learning from research & professionals.

-Admin 2 (o:

Created systems are never traumatized. Because only people who have zero issues in life would have the (lack of) self awareness to claim they chose to have someone else’s issues.

This is a perfect example of what I meant by a lot of created system hate is detached from the reality of created systems.

First of all, anon has either never read a variety of experiences and stories from created systems and are making up their own version, or they are choosing to fake claim peoples trauma because they don't like them.

Both of which are ignoring the lived reality of many created systems (who also happen to be traumatised).

And second, created systems don't see themselves as "creating other people's issues" or even as creating an issue at all. This is just another outside perspective on created plurality.

Using this argument also raising the question, does creating a system protect people from becoming traumatised in the future? And is it also the most effective form of trauma recovery?

I don't know, maybe we should just stop weaponizing trauma in discourse and individualise our idea of people who have trauma, because it's just a constant cycle of "these people can't have trauma because I think they suck, and clearly no person with trauma would suck".

Listen to me y'all, it's starting to sound like those stupid fucking "trauma made me stronger" quote posters they put in psych wards or "trauma makes you good" shit.

NO! Fuck you, people with trauma are still people too.

So, thanks anon, for giving me an example of how created system hate doesn't even make a lick of sense.

[thesolarcreature]

I now believe in plurality outside of CDDs...

I've been doing some research into plurality & created systems.

I used to be restful of those who identified with those experiences, because of my own experiences with DID. I didn't mention my opinions to anyone until Admin 2 and I started this blog.

I now see why I held that opinion, and to be honest it was close minded of me.

The CDD and plural communities often clash heads on "who can be a system". Which to be honest is a bit silly. If it's helping you then I don't care ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ BUT I will not deny that there are community issues... I think that not everyone realises how much personal information they are putting out on the internet for the whole world to access. Alongside the issue of grooming these communities have.

I'm not pro endo, I'm just a guy trying to understand others experiences to better understand the world. I try to align with a passivist mind set. I'm just here to listen to others opinions and add my own every now and again.

Yuh

Here's some silly cats.

-Admin 1

[thesolarcreature]

It's so scary going into psychotherapy

This will be a bit of a ramble...

I've been going through a lot recently, I had a life threatening illness - I am now in remission. As well as that, there is an investigation into my primary abuser, because of this social services and the police are involved. And on top and that I've had to tell members of my family about the fact I suspect I have DID/ a CDD alongside my other diagnosis.

This all has made my mental health worse than it's ever been and oh boy is that saying something.

I've been out of therapy for the last 3 years which was out of my control unfortunately.

I've finally been able to access a psychotherapy clinic. I'm so glad, and to be honest relieved, but at the same time I'm utterly terrified.

They offer all the therapy techniques I'm interested in like; DBT, Mindfulness, ACT, EFT, CFT and eventually EMDR.

Therapy is what I need. They are also able to diagnose issues which would help as I want to know what's wrong with me in order to fix it.

Because I'll be starting therapy soon I have started journaling again. Which is trippy because I didn't realise how severe my symptoms are lol...

I'm glad I'm finally ready to start proper therapy, I'm a bit intimidated by the idea of having to be vulnerable in front of someone who will be able to recognise my issues, imperfections and flaws. But I know ultimately I'm ready and willing to put in the work, I am fed up of being ill and disordered.

I guess what I want to say is

Even if you are struggling now, keep going, keep fighting, because a day will come whether that be tomorrow or in years where you will get the help you deserve.

There is, and always will be sun after the storm.

-Admin 1

[thesolarcreature]

Trauma didn't make me nice, I consciously made me nice because I don't want anyone else to suffer like I did. Trauma didn't make me strong, I made me strong. Don't you dare ever tell me my trauma made me anything but scared, broken, and confused. Don't give credit to the abusers for me being a good person. They didn't make me good, I made myself good.

[thesolarcreature]

TW CSA (severe content)

There are people in the system community identifying as MAPs. With pride.

So many on Tumblr.

I wanna see fewer "syspunks" infighting over inconclusive research on non-issues. We have bigger, uglier fish to fry.

I don't care if some are " MAP with no contact". You know that children will see your dogsh t. You don't know what your peers do in their free time.

You can cry harder about social stigma. This isn't about you, it's about the safety of children.

This is not a line you cross without consequences.

The second you accept your peers would commit repulsive crimes against children under ANY circumstances, you're enabling it. You're one of them. "insisting that they are at a risk of offending if they are stigmatised" see below. You can't threaten me into silence.

If you're non-contact, good. Harm reduction is the first step. You could choose to keep this personal and in therapy where it belongs. I want to believe you know this deep down.

People, read these screenshots with caution and remember: to oppose them is enough. You don't need to read all these. But I do want to post them.

Written by a supporter of the shit:

"Wants" to "encourage". You want some real encouragement? Ask for professional help. Go to a support group, not one ran by pedos.

Got the guts? Talk to an adult CSA survivor who hasn't lost themselves to this sickness. You need their consent, by the way. Yes, I know victims can eventually offend.

Written about their effects on this world's children and how deep this runs:

Conflict of interest? How surprising.

-Admin 2

Even as a child, I knew you were ill.