tumbleaboutit

[tumbleaboutit]

So funny story.

I work for a financial institution and have a pretty senior position, but I still have to do a lot of 'training'

Every quarter we have to do 'IT training' that's basically 'dont open phishing emails, don't give out personal information of our clients' and 'everything you do can be tracked, including internet usage and we can read your emails and teams whenever we want.'

Have at it.

I've worked there seven years and they've never once said anything about me reading the news, AO3, Google docs, anything. So I figure 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ I'm fine. They block all social media, but never blocked AO3.

Cut to today.

There are exactly two people in the company I like.

I'm outside decompressing with said two people as we do for 15 minutes at the end of everyday before we go home to our families. Kinda like wiping away the ick of the day.

IT guy: so what's ao3?

Me: what?! Why would you ask me that?

IT: because outside of sites related to your job, that's your most visited website

Me: you guys actually track that?!

IT: yeah we just don't give a shit. Unless you're being audited or investigated we don't give two fucks. So what's ao3?

My other friend is laughing her ass off.

Friend: OH MY GOD ISN'T THAT WHERE YOU READ YOUR WEREWOLF PORN?!

IT: enough said. Hope it's good at least.

Y'all my emo ass, skinny jeans and DC wearing IT guy knows I read/write werewolf porn on the clock and basically said godspeed.

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Something a lot of Ranma fanfiction writers misunderstand is the whole thing about Soun needing one of his daughters to get married so he can secure the future of the dojo. This has nothing to do with casual misogyny, it would actually be the exact same if he had all sons. It's the marriage that's the important part, specifically giving the dojo as a wedding gift, because in Japan putting real estate in your will is basically donating it to the government with extra steps. The inheritance taxes are harsh. Giving the home your family lives in as a wedding gift is a loophole that Japanese parents have been using for so long that they didn't feel the need to explain it to a young teen audience.

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i need to not see a pissy post about my mother’s bullshit at the top of my blog before i go to bed, so have some funny stories about my dad (aka my OG bestie):

as an idiot teenager he accidentally travelled to the soviet union with a literal KGB agent and did not realize it until he arrived back in the UK six months later. (the agent in question was more of a paper pusher than anything super dangerous just ftr.)

visited lenin’s tomb wearing a john lennon jacket, thinks he was very clever about it

after he flunked out of school in the 1960s, he ended up living on a beach in greece with a bunch of other expat burnouts, which means he spent a lot of his time drunk or high off his gourd. evidently one night while extremely intoxicated, he decided to take a small dinghy out onto the ocean for ??? error 404 reason not found, capsized the damn thing, and then just. picked a direction at random, and started swimming. he miraculously reached the beach and realized afterwards that he’d just capsized and lost his friend’s boat instead of his own. so, you know, well done. very undiagnosed adhd of him.

he claims a nun he visited in italy cured him of a toothache when he jokingly asked her to pray for him to get better

same visit to italy: claims he was stalked by a werewolf

accidentally ran over his first serious girlfriend with his motorcycle. this is how they met. they shared an ambulance to the hospital

nearly got us both killed when i was 6 years old by taking us out on a lake in the middle of a goddamn tornado warning, thus giving me a fear of boats that i needed like 15 years to recover from. thanks dad

got tipsy at a bar on december 30th one year, the whole staff convinced him it was the 31st, so he came tottering home to wish me a happy new year a day early. bless him

in 2007 we literally bumped into barack obama together. my father: “you really are quite tall, aren’t you” “that’s what i keep hearing”

the end

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YOOOOOO I JUST GOT MY FIRST LIBRARY CARD SINCE LIKE 2007 IT WAS SO EASY???

Like they literally just needed any photo ID with an address, I thought they needed like unopened mail and paperwork and crap, it took 5 goddamn minutes, I did it on my way home from work

And was NOBODY gonna tell me libraries have websites now with ebooks and audiobooks and documentaries and British TV and shit???

Why the FUCK have I been paying Netflix

GO GET A LIBRARY CARD

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I still think it’s hilarious that the reason nobody ever figures out Superman’s secret identity or where he lives or what he does when he’s not saving the planet, is because he already told them all the Kryptonian stuff that can’t be tied to any of his human friends or family. I guarantee you the in-universe wikipedia article on Superman lists his name as Kal-El and the “personal life” section says that he lives full-time at his private fortress of solitude at the north pole. Nobody in the world looks at Clark Kent and thinks “oh my god, maybe he’s superman!” for the same reason nobody ever starts to suspect that their coworker who looks KINDA like Barack Obama is actually secretly Barack Obama – They know who Barack Obama is and know what he does and they know their coworker Greg is Greg and not Barack Obama. They have no reason to assume Barack Obama secretly moonlights as Greg The IT Guy at their workplace even though they’ve never seen Greg and Obama in the same place. At best, “Greg is secretly Obama” would be a running joke at the office, and the same is true at the Daily Planet. “Kal-El of Krypton, who lives in a CRYSTAL PALACE at the NORTH POLE and whose dayjob is SUPERMAN, sometimes puts on a suit and pretends to be a clumsy reporter and lives in a one-bedroom walkup in Metropolis” is a ridiculous concept to anyone who doesn’t already know it’s true

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Hi Kaity! I recently became a mom (little man is 4.5 months old and delightful) and one of the things nobody prepared me for was how much of learning to be a parent involves confronting your own upbringing and consciously going "Nope, not doing that!" Did you have to go through this too? Is this something all moms go through? If so, holy crap, why isn't THIS the thing people warned me about at my baby shower instead of getting into debates on whether or not thumb-sucking is okay?

YES!! I don't know if all mothers have to go through it but I sure did! And I had amazing parents!! I had to learn to trust my gut about food and what was okay for P to eat and that's what birthed the FOOD RULES (aka not having any)

We've been desensitizing my mom and dad by making them face time with us while we try the snacks in our Japan Crate and they're not allowed to say anything negative (no ew, gross, gagging, anything like that!) and they're doing AMAZING I'm really proud of them actually

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They don’t actually give you an encyclopedic knowledge of something when you get in a degree in it. They give you the skill to learn more about it on your own.

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when a fic starts having a character dirty talk but they wouldn’t say that shit with a gun to their head

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She has the time and mental energy to have fun with her presentation! And to arrange her living space to her liking!

if you make that female character less goth as a sign of her ~healing~ or ~improving her life~ I will kill you

make her MORE gloriously dark and over-the-top. she's growing into herself. she's getting comfortable being who she wants to be. do you see the vision. I am crying and throwing things

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Game where the ancient hero is awakened from the deathless sleep of centuries in the hour of their people's greatest need, only to find that civilisation is thriving and there are no obvious threats on the horizon; the game then becomes a fish-out-of-water detective sim as they try to figure out what woke them up, and also solve other, smaller mysteries along the way.

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I never saw people say stuff like this enough when I was a teenager, so I’m saying it now.

I’m in my mid-thirties and I have never had sex. I’ve thought about it and could have had one or two opportunities if I put in more effort, but I always decided against it because I just wasn’t into it at the time.

I can safely say that I do not feel I have missed out on anything. I was perfectly capable, by myself, of learning about my own body and boundaries without anyone else there to muddy the waters. The immense pressure that was there in my teens/twenties to Have Sex Just Do It is basically gone. I’m vibing. I’ve got my routine by myself in bed that I enjoy, and that’s enough for me.

And in the unlikely event that I ever decide to have sex with someone in the future, I don’t feel at all like I’m lacking some essential Knowledge or Skill that would “make it good” for someone else. I fully expect to ask my partner out loud what they like and to receive an answer clearly communicated and to relax and have fun. And if it’s a disappointing experience, I’m fine with that too. It is what it is.

Sex is just not that big of a deal. I suspected it as a teen, and I’m more sure of it now. It’s fine to have it or not have it. It’s whatever.

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the really crazy thing about cooking is that once you practice it enough (for all the gamers reading this: "grind enough exp") your threshold for wuat counts as a low effort / depression / I Dont Really Want To Cook meal rises steadily and you can feel yourself becoming the kind of person whose "chill dinner" takes 1h45 and involves three pans

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ultimately i think the eternal draw of concubine dramas for me is that they all focus on this extremely taxing condition of co-victimhood under a supreme, omnipotent master where nonetheless gradations of power are wielded against each other, creating at all times and for virtually all characters the possibility to be both receiver and perpetrator of abuses. there is a structural impossibility in tracing a marked separation between people that harm and people that are harmed, people that have power and people that don't: everyone lives in a tightly interconnected hive of ritualised relations where numerous hierarchies are harshly defined and enforced but also open to reshuffling. navigating it requires inevitably confronting your condition as both object and subject, both passive and agentive member of the inescapable cycle of subjugations dictated by an unchangeable social order. the coexistence of multiple axes and levels of power is not uncommon in any social context, but concubine dramas are particularly effective in showing complex stratifications that are highly condensed in a closed environment with relatively few participants. it's a pressure cooker of ethical dilemmas over possessing a relation to power that cannot be rejected or evaded but only negotiated and re-negotiated. the refusal (mostly due to historical impossibility) to provide a way out of this conflict is something i deeply appreciate

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I mean yeah we can yassify Lex Luthor and talk about hes sooo gay for Superman.

Or MAYBE we can talk about how Lex Luthor in Superman (2025) is a clear parallel for Musk, and the president of Borovia is a parallel for Trump, in what was clearly a commentary on billionaires and their role in war politics that was written before but now feels more apt because of recent events.

Maybe we can talk about how the "where's the dog" scene mimics the way conservatives (and terfs, too) provoke the people they don't like into an emotional reaction so they can seem like the one being "reasonable."

Maybe we can talk about how the story Luthor spun about Superman "grooming" the people of earth is just like the way conservatives frame immigrants and the queer community to fearmonger.

Maybe we can about the guy in Luthor's war room who changed his mind and pointed Mister Terrific to the right computer, saving minutes that saved lives.

Maybe we can talk about how Eve, an abuse victim, helped save the day with one small act of rebellion that seemed frivilous or useless until Lois looked deeper.

Maybe we can talk about how Lois's superpower is research and investigation and journalism to uncover the truth behind the media facade luthor put up.

Maybe we can talk about how Superman's greatest power isn't his strength or his brain but his Kindness, and how much he cares about every creature great and small, and how that care inspired Element Man to reach for the goodness within himself and do the right thing.

All my love and respect to the people who do ship them, ship and let ship is a rule I live by. I'm just amazed that none of the things that I truly love about this film made it onto my dash before I saw it for the first time tonight. And I wanna talk about them, because I think more people need to hear about them