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i wish i was more content existing for myself. i hate that i keep holding on to the hope that maybe one of my friends could be more similar to me, and then i have to come to terms that they're not. and it's okay, it's just lonely sometimes.

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i've been gone for a bit, but happy pride month to all !!

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more of a rant then a proper vent, but i was thinking about my friends and then like my friends, and idk. there's one friend that i know of, and we barely text now, but whenever we managed to see each other before, it always felt so natural. they're somewhere on the aromantic spectrum, same as me, and we live so far away from each other now due to school, but i miss them. i like talking to them, and it always felt like they understood what i wanted to say even when i couldn't word it right. sometimes i think that if we both stayed for school instead of going far away, maybe we could have been something. maybe not romantic, but still, something. i think that even now, even being so far away, even with everything, i would still want to be something with them.

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not even in a sexual way but i’m just craving affection because i feel like crap i just want someone to hug me for a couple of hours and tell me i’m going to be okay 

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in some ways, i think i resent my friends who can feel romantically. not because they do, but because i don't think i will. there is something so lonely in acknowledging that. lonely and freeing. i hate that they will experience an emotion i may never understand, one that is valued so highly by society, that i sit there and wonder if embracing this aspect of me will ever be worth it. what would i give to just have a taste of it? would the rush justify everything i have resented? i think that maybe i am biased because i do not feel romantically, but also, what if they are because they do?

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Being aroace with a squish is really like. You look so nice and cute and pretty (not like that), I’d like to snuggle up in bed with you (not like that) and play with your hair (not like that) and lay there for a while (not like that) and hold your hand all the time (not like that) and hang out with you one-on-one (not like that) and get to you know you on a deep and personal level (not like that)

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actually no, we're not "dating". we're bound together for infinity. like the stars. so, fuck you, actually.

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"love is what makes us human" actually it's 'select all images with boat' but go off I guess

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Not by name, but I looked it up a little bit after I saw this reblog. It definitely seems interesting to look into.

i will never understand the emphasis society places on romantic relationships. why is the ideal future always portrayed as living with your significant other in a happy, committed, romantic relationship? why is there a whole holiday dedicated towards romantic love? i've heard so many people i know say that they're so lonely because they aren't in a romantic relationship, and i can't help but wonder how are they lonely with so many friends around them? so many things have become romanticized to the point where people no longer think it's socially acceptable to do them with friends. maybe people would feel less lonely then if it was normal to hold hands with people, to give them your sweaters, to lay together on the couch while watching a show. human connection is so so so important. i will never understand how is it that in a world full of love, we only seem to idolize one part of it.

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It's definitely more prominent in western societies rather than being something universal, and obviously not limited to aromanticism or asexuality. However, I can really only speak of it from those perspectives because I haven't ever experienced romantic attraction as of now. I did used to share my jackets with my friends before too, but as we got older, it's just became something that's more reserved for their romantic partners rather than their friends. Also, I am referencing Valentine's day, yes, and while technically, it's celebrating love, and each person can celebrate it how they want to. Societally, it tends to be marketed as a day to celebrate romantic love (ex. dates, kissing, other things that have "romantic" meaning). I can really only say things from my experiences and perspective, but I do hope these things become a little more normalized to do with friends, so people might feel a little less alone.

i will never understand the emphasis society places on romantic relationships. why is the ideal future always portrayed as living with your significant other in a happy, committed, romantic relationship? why is there a whole holiday dedicated towards romantic love? i've heard so many people i know say that they're so lonely because they aren't in a romantic relationship, and i can't help but wonder how are they lonely with so many friends around them? so many things have become romanticized to the point where people no longer think it's socially acceptable to do them with friends. maybe people would feel less lonely then if it was normal to hold hands with people, to give them your sweaters, to lay together on the couch while watching a show. human connection is so so so important. i will never understand how is it that in a world full of love, we only seem to idolize one part of it.

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i will never understand the emphasis society places on romantic relationships. why is the ideal future always portrayed as living with your significant other in a happy, committed, romantic relationship? why is there a whole holiday dedicated towards romantic love? i've heard so many people i know say that they're so lonely because they aren't in a romantic relationship, and i can't help but wonder how are they lonely with so many friends around them? so many things have become romanticized to the point where people no longer think it's socially acceptable to do them with friends. maybe people would feel less lonely then if it was normal to hold hands with people, to give them your sweaters, to lay together on the couch while watching a show. human connection is so so so important. i will never understand how is it that in a world full of love, we only seem to idolize one part of it.

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Bruh did I just get clocked wtf

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i don't think the people i know understand just how much i love people. humanity, i fear, will always forever be in my mind. i tell myself that i was made to be on the aroace spectrum, so that i could love the world. but it always seems to circle back to humanity, to people. life's best and cruelest gift to me. born to love, but not always in the right way.

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is it so much to want to be offered something instead of having to ask? i know if i were to ask my friends for help, they would probably say yes given that it didn't infringe on their time. is it so wrong to want it to infringe on their time? i would let them infringe on my time. i feel overly selfish and i hate that. they have lives. who am i to dictate who they hang out with and why? i hate how i feel. i hate the constant fear that i'll get forgotten, shoved aside for someone else. i said it in one of my first posts, and i'll repeat over and over again, but i want to be important to someone, and i hate that it might not come in the way i want it to.

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i know that this is mainly a aroace vent account, but reposting this here just incase any of you need to hear it. i am here for you. feel free to reach out to me in my dms. you are so much more than this. you matter so much. this is something that you can survive.

queer people of all kinds. i am looking you in the eyes. do not fucking kill yourself. are you listening to me it will be okay. it will get better. i am shaking you by the shoulders do. not. fucking. do. it. you have so much to keep going for and so many people who love you. the cost of the present will not outweigh the life ahead of you. i love you. chin up or down keep walking you'll get there. we will pull you back up onto your feet should you fall. i love you

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to everyone who lives in america, try your best to stay safe. the lack of respect trump has towards anyone who does not immediately benefit him is disgusting. it's genuinely insane that a person who is a rapist, criminal, racist, bigot, and many more bad things can be and has been elected into office.

you can survive. many people like you existed before and will continue to exist in the future. be kind to one another. lean on each other. support each other. love each other, so that the world is a little bit nicer and this is a little bit easier to go through.

this is not the end. my heart goes out to you all. we will get through this together.

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i think. i think i have platonically crushed on almost every friend i have ever had who has reciprocated a bit of what i gave them. what is wrong with me.