empahla

[empahla]

It's Good To Like Yourself, Actually.

*trigger warning, discussion of self-harm, attempted suicide Fine Forearms I used to tell people that the thing I liked most about myself was my forearms. It’s true. They’re aesthetically very pleasing. They’re symmetrical, which is a win on the human approval scale right off the hop. We’re wired to like symmetry. I suspect that’s one of the reasons my nerve-damaged chin bothers me so much – it…

[empahla]

Movies and books have long been my safe space. They've no judgment, whereas my brain has too much. How interesting that recording the consumption thereof is helping me let negative judgments about productivity and earning our air go. #mentalhealth #anxiety #books #movies

[empahla]

May 2025 - Movies I Watched, Books I Read

San Andreas (2016)[i] The Cloverfield Paradox (2018) “The Hot Zone,” by Jayne Castle “Siren’s Call,” by Jayne Castle 400 Days (2020) “Illusion Town,” by Jayne Castle “Deal With the Devil,” by Kit Rocha Bird Box (2018) Paradise Hills (2018) Otherhood (2019) No Escape (2015) “Menopause and You” [limited series magazine] Doors (2021) Knowing (2009) My Sister’s Keeper (2009) Uglies…

[empahla]

April 2025 - Movies I Watched, Books I Read

The Age of Adeline (2015) [i] Midnight Mass (2024) Jupiter Ascending (2015) Aquaman (2010) Gravity (2013) Contagion (20111) “Taylor Swift Style,” by Sarah Chappelle “The Return of Rafe MacKade,” by Nora Roberts Godzilla (2014) The Meg (2017) Abagail (2024) The Night Eats the World (2018) Let Me In (2010) Irish Wish (2024) “Guild Boss,” by Jayne Castle Stargate (1994) The Lazarus…

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March 2025 - Movies I Watched, Books I Read

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February 2025 - Movies I Watched, Books I Read

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January 2025 - Movies I watched, Books I Read

[empahla]

I've been drinking too much over the last bit. I've stopped now. This is a good thing. Crutches are for broken ankles. They're a bad operating system. #MentalHealth #Drinking #Substanceabuse #Change #Recovery #Grief

[empahla]

Nature makes things better.

[empahla]

I liked how I got motivated when I was younger: I miss the parental kick in the ass to get things going - metaphorical, of course. #depression #grief #recovery #poetry

[empahla]

Chaos, Change, and Leaning In.

I’m stuck, and I’m not enjoying it. I feel trapped inside myself of late. I feel like I’m doing nothing, accomplishing nothing. This isn’t true objectively, but it’s how I feel nevertheless. Even writing things out and checking them off doesn’t help. When I start feeling paralyzed by inertia, it usually means depression has strengthened her grip. I’m also rage-filled and quick to anger of late,…

[empahla]

Rereading is friendship and inspiration.

[empahla]

You can't unring a bell, and you can't turn back time.

I’m feeling tired and overwhelmed these days. A lot is going on in my life and in my head, and my stress level is red-lining. I’m not my bestest self ever when I’m stressed out. I’m short-tempered, quick to anger, and can be rude and unkind if I feel even the slightest bit challenged or under threat. Patience has left the building once again. I had a hot exchange with someone yesterday while…

[empahla]

I love walking with my dog, but occasionally it descends into chaos. I blame life. The friction burn is simply a gift with purchase. #dogs #burns #firstaid #anxiety

[empahla]

"What do you do?" is a horrible question. We need better small talk. #dailyprompt #smalltalk #mentalhealth

[empahla]

No Fate.

No fate but what we make. I firmly believe that. Who knew Sarah Connor was a fan of stoicism? #NoFate #Philosophy #Destiny

“No fate but what we make,” is a favourite quote of mine. It comes from Terminator 2: Judgement Day (1991), a favourite movie of mine. I like almost any movie that has a nuclear explosion in it. They fascinate me. They’re beautiful in their destruction. I like the quote because it inspires me. Much of that movie inspired me, in fact, though my life has unfolded differently. I haven’t been chased…

[empahla]

Shots of the dog Suki, and an update.

A dog is a learning curve, a wonderful one. #pets #dogs #dogwalking