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[eyezoffyre]

Steps

Not everything that weighs me down is mine to carry

Over time I found to be loved by you meant I had to abandon myself

If nothing else, you taught me how not to be

Today, being loved by someone else is no longer my priority

It has been a great distance to walk the winding dark path back to myself

And I am still walking, slowly but surely, and loving every step

[eyezoffyre]

The first poem I ever posted here.. it feels good to ease back into this place. So many amazing writers.

Elemental

If your curled raven hair weren’t the color of night, that charcoal night of  dusky vines  and earth swallowing earth, or those black orbs of your soul weren’t  shining luminaries,  super nova, celestial bodies of twilight flying across my sky, if your tender smile weren’t a secret sleuth, a witchcraft, hijacker of my esoteric dreams, or your whispers not  an incandescent rain nourishing the greens of my inner being with liquid torrents, even if you, my milky way, were just a man,  transparent and simplified, I then could not taste you in breath, the heated air, the wind that blows me into a vapor point, yes, my sun-drawn love, when you hold me I become everything that is of this life…  the universe and terra firma, cloudburst and zephyr, everything has become,  and is, because you are.

[eyezoffyre]

Echoes Fading

Some days, the hurt would scream so loudly I couldn’t hear anything else It existed  between molecules, persisting like white noise that I couldn’t shut off

It oozed into my ears like flaming black tar leaving me hunched over and gasping On days like that I would slip into a hole of hating myself as your words would keep echoing inside of me     inside of me

           Inside of me But I managed to finally evict you from the paper-thin walls you strung across my veins And the hurt you once carved into my soul has become like a faint teardrop, almost unnoticeable and easily wiped away

[eyezoffyre]

muddled

the melting streets are oozing muddy snow… it’s the end of February and mother nature is confused, trying to decide whether she is winter or spring sometimes I think she forgets herself

my eyes linger at my feet as i step along, half-skips to avoid the muddled streams that have gathered like tiny armies across the concrete i notice my floundering shoelace fumbling in and out of the mud

i reach down to fix it and it makes me remember you

the way we had come undone and the way i tried so hard to tie things back together as we flopped around in a puddle of indecision

i feel for mother nature… i think am like her, still trying to decide if you left me hot or cold or indifferent and whether i should even remember you or not

[eyezoffyre]

all in

when i met you i knew that in order to love you the way you deserve i had to let go of my entire heart knowing full well it will never be the same again

[eyezoffyre]

dangerous girl

i’ve been called dangerous by many men

not because you might find me in the arms of another and not because i will leave suddenly for no reason

no, i am not the kind that will break your heart to be sewn together by someone else’s hands

i am the kind that will love you so fiercely you will feel dizzy when you think of me

and i’m the girl that will kiss you like a hurricane when you are needing a little crazy and i will fly to you like a butterfly soft and tender when you need to cry

i will be beside you when no one else will

and when you leave me- you will because that’s how it goes in this life- because all things come to an end,

i will be the one you remember on crazy nights when you’re skin to skin with another that doesn’t dig her nails in quite right

and i will be the one you will think of when your heart is bending and needing tenderness

and when you are older and someone asks you about the times you were most happy, you will realize i am the woman that threaded your smiles together so delicately

no love, i am not dangerous because i will hurt you when we are together

i am dangerous because i will be the one you let get away

[eyezoffyre]

reflecting

I am beginning to understand that there is a whole world inside of me

to find love i must love me to find peace i must be at peace

I am beginning to see that within me is a mirror that reflects everything that i am

to find pure joy i must enjoy to find protection i must protect

I am beginning to move forward towards mastery and the gift of understanding that even when i am alone i should never feel lonely

because my soul contains the universe and the universe exists to reflect my love and acceptance of me

[eyezoffyre]

reaching...

Dear heart, keep reaching forward the battle feels harsh, but it is yours… flowers will continue to grow across your fingertips as you reach towards the things you are desiring

Have you ever noticed  the ocean only knows her existence when she sees her own waves reaching upward?

[eyezoffyre]

unspoken

my throat is a cavern full of ghosts, dark and sharp, cutting me when memories push through that should’ve been kept silent

its phantoms weave and slip around my larynx, tightening themselves until i can’t breathe, full of the things i should’ve said but never did

there are days when they gather, so heavy and laden with listlessnes, i fear i will gag from the weight of them all

and on some days my tongue falls into sink holes that feel like an oblivion of missed chances

the past is gone, out of reach…

but i cannot bury the ghostly voices of the things i never dared to say

[eyezoffyre]

Teaching my kids what a true treasure is #photo #photos #pic #picture #snapshot #art #beautiful #instagood #picoftheday #photooftheday #color #all_shots #exposure #composition #focus #capture #moment #kansascity #missouri #bookstore #books #childhood #children @best.of.kc (at Prospero's Books)

[eyezoffyre]

(Samira J Reyal)

i can't settle or sit still and be quiet like a good little mouse

mediocracy is not an option.. life has to be felt at full tilt

this need inside of me is like a need to bleed... to feel the burn of a thousand suns on my pale soul and.. sometimes.. sometimes i even fear i must choke on my own breath to feel my heartbeat bashing about inside of me

and then.. then i want to feel the blood course slowly through my veins

and know that everything.. all of it.. will be ok

[eyezoffyre]

yesteryears

somewhere other than here snow falls as softly as angel wings and breath collects itself into shapes before fading quietly into memories of cold mornings and hot cocoa the fire crackling  the family together soft laughter and knowing eyes somewhere other than here

[eyezoffyre]

inconsequential

i am perfectly flawed

a bird with only one wing watching my flock soar while I flounder, worthlessly, in their shadow

i am the sunlight 1,000 feet below the ocean

invisible and useless

i am here and breathing

but i fear in truth i am nothing

[eyezoffyre]

unseen

i have always felt out of place... like a rock standing up in the middle of the pacific, awkward and alone, or the moon as she hangs silently in the day sky, forgotten and out of place but i see her and i ask myself, will i always be left dangling in a world that doesn’t see me, who closes their eyes when i am shining?

[eyezoffyre]

crumpled

my heart is a crumpled piece of paper once filled with promises now forgotten i am something no longer of value scratched out and tossed aside

[eyezoffyre]

how can the unlovable be loved?

a long time ago when i was just a little snowflake someone broke me now, decades later, i yearn for love.. so deep inside of me that it crushes my soul, yet if someone has ever loved me i have never been able to believe it was real

[eyezoffyre]

storyteller

the stories he told every time his fingers traced patterns on my body filled my mind with enough fairy tales to last a life time