hoppubunny - Tumblr blog

[hoppubunny]

memes I made when I was bored

[hoppubunny]

how to fast for long periods of time (the playing into human physcology way) step by step✨:

1.get life fasting 2.join a circle 3. see others fasting times and become extremely competitive in order to beat them 4. sucessssss 5. get refeeding syndrome because the meal that broke your fast was infront of your family and you didn't want to raise suspicion by eating too little 6. Hospitalization- 7. Treatment??? 8. Shit you've recovered 9. start again

(This didn't happen to me BTW just the competitive fasting part)

[hoppubunny]

Eating disorder be like:

[hoppubunny]

does high restricting mean eating more cals than low restricting, or restricting your cals meaning that you eat less cals????

[hoppubunny]

Binged yesterday but at least I finally shat i guess??

[hoppubunny]

wanted to skip dinner but it was already near when i needed to leave for something.

there were 5 minutes left before we needed to go when I came down because I took so long to decide what to wear and my dad was just standing at the sink and watching me until i like served myself food then he left which made me wonder if he knew I hadn't been eating his dinners the past few days???

I spent too long mucking around wanting to cleanly hide it, and i sat there for a while mixing it with my spoon and fork to dirty it so I'd be eating in a realistic amount of time then my dad walked in as I was awkwardly standing at the counter with a freezer bag clenched in my hand trying to hide it.

I had to awkwardly eat a bit infront of him and he was like 'you can eat it in the car' luckily I was able to throw a little away then eat the rest in the car so it wasn't suspicous.

It was Japanese curry but I mixed it with the rice and green beans which were the vegetable sidedish so it didn't even taste that good.

I basically only ate 2 boiled eggs and a green apple for lunch for 3 school days, and just green apples for the other 2 days so I was really happy with myself and this just kind of ruined it.

I was planning on letting myself eat more on the weekends but now I just feel horrible and I want to starve (though I'll have to eat dinner because we actually eat weekend dinners together)

Ugh. I wish I could just fast without suspicion :(

[hoppubunny]

tw ed sheeran

[hoppubunny]

I can't wait to have a place of my own where there'll be no temptations. I wouldn't buy any in the first place and there wouldn't be other's food to peck from. Really, all I'd need is a mini fridge to fill with diet sodas. No more eating dinners with family's to curb suspicions, no sneaking around to check the scale. Just me and 4na.

[hoppubunny]

sometimes its not about the losing weight, it's about the numbers, the control. Weighing out every gram to know the calories, the tangible progress of seeing the number on the scale go down.

Something about it is just so satisfying isn't it?

[hoppubunny]

Like it's a 0 cal option of bubble tea. I brewed one of my mom's random tea containers with Chinese written on it (I can't read chinese) and it turned out to be black tea and it tasted good and like bubble tea???? Like it doesn't even need sugar, or maybe it tasted good cause it was actual tea leaves and not a tea bag lol.

[hoppubunny]

not trying to glorify but after fasting for a while, or when you're restricting it actually makes you appreciate the food and eat it slower to savour it instead of mindlessly eating it infront of a TV. Like it actually tastes delicious.

You stop snacking when you're bored, or when you're sad, because suddenly you're aware of how much you really eat.

it's basically mindful eating but like really extreme I guess o_O

[hoppubunny]

don't understand how people can just eat one plate and be done with it without wanting to eat about 3 more plates even though they're full.

[hoppubunny]

when my dad gave me a bag of chips. i didn't eat it,

Instead i doused it in sunblock and threw it in the bin. I wanted to omad it so bad and i ended up roughly cscluating the kcal from the kj (divide kj by 4) and it was about 700 kcal which really put it in perspective because that's more kcals than an average meal.

[hoppubunny]

I was cooking brown rice, then my mom poured oil into it because it was 'too dry' which really, what the fuck. She literally adds oils to porridge, soup and the whole shebang. But really? Rice???

But I guess it's better that i didn't eat the extra carbs.

[hoppubunny]

just a little more, you tell yourself. with every pound you creep closer to your goal. soon you'll be happy. your thighs won't chaft and your rolls won't fold. starving won't hurt you if you don't plan on getting old.

But it's so far away and the ice cream in the freezer is only one kitchen away. you eat, but it is not as sweet as that number on the scale.

just a little more, you tell yourself. A little more ice cream won't make a difference when you've already eaten so much. You've already failed.