lost-ash-es - Tumblr blog

[lost-ash-es]

the flowers are in bloom

and the sun is shining

there's a cool breeze in the air

and the sky above is clear

but bring your head near the ground

put your ear to the soil

do you hear that?

something stirs beneath the earth

something loud

and something impatient

every now and then, if you look closely

you can see it push the dirt up from below

but on the grass above, the children are playing

the weather is safe

and feels just right

and everything seems at peace

but listen closely

do you hear that?

in the split second when everything's quiet

something stirs beneath the earth

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

the beat in my hands

i can feel it under my skin

vibrating my bones

and staining my clothes

it's the dust in the light

it massages my soul

and takes the place of my blood

i'm holding this beat in my hands

it's getting under my fingernails

i'm soaking in it's waves

it's all around me now

i'm drowning in it, but i can breathe

better than ever

it's filling my lungs

it's holding me now

this beat's in my hands

and i'm in its

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

you weren't where i found you

i found you where i searched but you weren't there

well not really

i think i just saw the trails of your spirit ‬

i think it was just the imprint of your ghost

maybe the crumbs of your sparkle

and the smell of your perfume

or the odor that started to take its place

i found you there

i find you everywhere

in every book i read

in every thought i have

in every glance from a stranger

but i can't find you anywhere

i think you disappeared

i found you where you once were

where you aren't anymore

where you haven't been in months

in years

i found you there

when i stopped searching

but i never stopped searching

i found you where you were not

i found you where i searched

but you weren't there

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

but what do i say when these words aren't even mine?

what do i write when my feelings are too fleeting to grasp?

and why should i sign my name below these borrowed thoughts anyway?

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

roses

how many roses washed up on the shore when you were talking? and how many of them did you let wash away? did you stop to grab one for me? did you even notice them at all?

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

does everything matter? does anything?

everything has an affect on eachother, which only matters or makes a difference if each thing that affects or influences smth else mattered to what it was influencing, making that thing matter and so on. so everything either matters or it doesnt. and sometimes it feels like everything does so i believe it that does so then it does but i sometimes i get detached and then nothing feels like it matters anymore so i believe it that doesnt so then it doesnt.

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

if you follow me

we'll build a home on mars

turning moons into cigars

falling asleep to the whispers of the stars

and following the maps hidden in our scars

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

i am a god that walks the forest floor and the earth which formed the dirt to create it. i am the trees that allow me to breathe and their air that flows through my lungs. i am the love that birthed me and keeps me alive. i am flesh and bone. i am a feeling soul. i am everything i need to be, for i am a god and nothing more.

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

yearnings of a sociopath

you love me and you say you mean it

and i feel it and then i eat it

and it disappears within me

it flows through then out me

but it's nice all the same

i think you mean what you say

like maybe i could learn to love too in that way

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

poem i wrote with my friend koko and our mistress tina

smoking with koko in the room

everything's swirling away

we're flying on parallel brooms

and we're flying too fast to pray

but somehow we'll go back today

i don't know how or which way

i just hope we'll make it back okay

i hope we don't end in dismay

but the crystals are always so good

and they say if it's good it's really good

and if it's bad it's still good

but i don't know if i'm doing what i should

i don't know if i'm doing all that i could

but i just kinda feel alone

like a dog to its bone

my heart's beating a different a tone

but i don't think it's the tina that made me stoned

- ash and koko

[lost-ash-es]

the earth moves slow but i need to run

the flowers grow back with patience, not rage

but i wish i could just turn this damn page

i want to bathe in a sea of green sage

but my skin would sure sink, it would sure age

and i'd feel so captive without a cage

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

stuff

sometimes it's not enough

and sometimes it feels so rough

i try to act tough

but i'm drowing in stuff

i do more, i do more

i'll wash up on the shore

and i thought that i saw you, i swear i was sure

but maybe it was the ghost of all of your snores

and i want to do something -- i want to have fun

but i put it up to my head, that goddamn gun

i take more stuff but they don't let me run

they just spin me in circles until i'm spun

and when i leave, i know i'll return

i'll seek the fire and i'll feel the burn

i'll wait and wait 'till it's my turn

and i'll rest softly near the fern

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

I Am Fucked Up On Drugs

they laid three magic beans before me. "take one." i took all of them. what? im bored. and it didnt take long for the affects to kick in. i got up to get something from the fridge and everything started walking with me. in perfect harmony too.

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

i breathe poetry

it swims through my blood and rests in my bones

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

lovesick

my love for you grows and never slows

it consumes me entirely

it tries to eat me whole

it stalks me in the night

and spreads throughout like a disease

i love you i love you

and it might kill me

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

i miss the fire

i miss the warmth

i miss the light in your eyes

as the flames shone through

but i don't miss when it started to burn me

when it started to burn you

i don't miss how my skin blistered when you held me

or how yours started to melt off

i stood there as the fire overcame you

as it shined through your eyes

as it almost blinded me

as it completely blinded you

but i do miss the warmth

and the colors

and the captive freedom

i do miss you

but the fire overcame you

-ash

[lost-ash-es]

nah nah dont burn it. dont tear it down. dont add shit. dont take shit. just observe, appreciate, and experience it. let yourself see and be seen. soak into it without changing it, like how you'd swim in the ocean. recognize you are one with it. and let that bring you peace.

-ash