moondharse

[moondharse]

I don't have memory issues.

My thought are 💫limited edition💫

[moondharse]

About dissociation in childhood, from Treating Adult Survivors of Childhood Emotional Abuse and Neglect (pp. 148-150)

[moondharse]

[moondharse]

Shout out to mentally ill people who dropped out of school

- shout out to the kids who were “so bright” and ‘heading somewhere” and had to drop out because school was too much to handle along with mental illness

- shout out to the kids who struggled to get where they got before they dropped out

- shout out to the kids who tried and tried and tried and still couldn’t finish

you aren’t unintelligent because you dropped out of school, you aren’t a delinquent or a bad person because you dropped out of school, just because you did what you had to doesn’t make you a bad person

[moondharse]

man i have some pretty good self esteem right now

[moondharse]

man i have some pretty good self esteem right now

[moondharse]

it's so wild when your parent changes when you become an adult. my dad is very cordial and non confrontational - he regularly helps me with adult stuff like changing the oil or providing insurance tips. he's always smiling when i call him on video and providing jokes when i complain about college

when i was a kid, i would have to tiptoe around his anger issues often, sometimes running quietly past his work table until he got his own place completely separate from our family, locked away for days. every so often he would start screaming in the car and trying to hit me or my brother for talking too loud while my mom attempted to calm him down as he swerved on the road. and now he, smiling, helps me with car insurance.

like oh, this is just who you are when you have power over someone, and this is who you are when you dont have power over someone. no wonder you can have a normal life, friends, work while scaring the shit out of your kids and wife. i see it now. i see why no one would have believed me. that, i think, is one of the core fears of trauma - seeing the outside of it from the perspective of other adults that brushed you aside, and understanding. of course, that understanding gives the opposite of solace; it just gives you more grief with nowhere for it to go

[moondharse]

viewing queer identities as “this is the label that makes me happy and feels most accurate now” rather than “this is who I am, was, and always will be” will definitely take the pressure off, friends. changing your mind is proof that you have one.

[moondharse]

there's a dark timeline out there where tumblr fanfic writers are considered influencers and get sponsorships, and during kinktober, the horniest fanfics drop and all your fave bloggers are doing "day 1 - toys" and they're including a paragraph that loosely goes something like

[moondharse]

you know even if a homeless person or a starving person is in that position because of their own "bad decisions" i don't care. it doesn't matter. no supposed financial misstep is enough to condemn someone to homelessness or poverty.

[moondharse]

someone being open about being intersex does not give you the entitlement to know what variation they are, nor what their genitalia looks like.

[moondharse]

going to get gunned down for this, but just like feminism, there's bad and good strains of men's activism.

bad: women won't fuck me so i'm opressed this is the feminists fault

good: The expectations of men under patriarchy are unattainable and cause mass suicide and the use of dangerous steroids. maybe we should try to change that hand in hand with feminists

[moondharse]

How do y'all decide when to reblog vs when to comment?

Is there some type of ettiquette?

[moondharse]

This is only partially true tho. There is a massive (largely unintentional) push to be a binary gender. From all sides. The worst I've seen/experienced from doctors (because of the power they have over you) but also from family, society AND the trans community.

Sure, nearly noone physically forces you but it's about the subtext. Theres the same pressure to detransition for transmascs too.

It's when we're left out of discussions.

Left out of queer spaces.

Erased from history.

Not respected.

When people don't know how to engage with us so they ignore us or leave us out.

If the world is heavily signaling "you should not exist in the way that you are", it's not suprising that an already heavily struggeling community would be impacted. If your sense of self is unstable, it's more sensible to outside messaging.

Yes, even tomboys would be affected. They'd mostly be pressured to be a 'proper girl/woman', but in the queer/trans community, there'd be a push to "finally come out" through things like egg jokes and the such.

We're not helping anyone by pretending we're perfect. Because we're not and we'll never be.

The trans community feels like a safe space to many, but it can only be that if we call out bad behaviour and systemic issues within too.

Regardless of wether we're personally affected by them.

One really weird thing transphobic cis women will say is something to the effect of “I was a tomboy, thank god it was before the transgender craze. They would made me transition.” Like, probably not, girl. As you are a cis woman who has never communicated any form of gender dysphoria. It makes it really obvious that they think being transgender is just conforming to different gender roles. There is an ocean between a little girl who likes traditionally masculine fashion and has traditionally masculine interests and a child that is transgender. They are not a slippery slope. They don’t push you down the slide of transgenderism if you cut your hair short when you’re 12.

There are so many trans men who were never tomboys, who were the picture of the ‘perfect little girl’ and genuinely enjoyed traditionally feminine hobbies and expressing themselves in ways associated with femininity. It confuses and angers cis people when they come out as trans because they only see gender as a role to perform and not an identity. If you’re truly a woman, you’re generally not susceptible to randomly turning into a man. If you’re truly a man, you’re generally not susceptible to randomly turning into a woman.

[moondharse]

The idea that you should only have one or two queer labels is so blatently heteronormativity.

It's saying that you can have one or two bits 'wrong' with you but mostly you should still conform.

Fuck off.

[moondharse]

PSA to any trans guys who never had their dad teach them stuff.

There's a Youtuber who teaches all sorts of info that dads are meant to pass onto their kids (mainly sons) such as:

How to shave

Tie a tie

Jumpstart a car

Change a tire

Unclog a bathtub

Fix a running toilet

Patch a hole

Change a doorknob

Any many other things you'll need to know for home/vehicle maintenance. I highly recommend it, if you have anything you need to know about "man stuff" and don't know where to ask, or have anyone to ask.

[moondharse]

Friend: Don't you want to have a romance?

Me: I'm good, I have romance at home.

Romance I have at home: