#//gotta switch the playlist now </3

[keeps-ache]

this is really how i'm making decisions nowadays, huh?

[arachine]

— ❝on this fateful night...two hearts danced.❞ ˚₊✩‧₊

ᥫ᭡ pairing :: neteyam sully x human! reader

ᥫ᭡ synopsis :: in omaticayan culture, a young na’vi male does not yet become a full fledged adult until he passes one of two rites of passage: 1) choosing an ikran, and 2) carving a bow from the wood of Hometree (and/or choosing a woman). reader is now 20, and the only man she’s ever loved is expected to choose a wife soon. one day when she overhears a rumor concerning neteyam and the first woman in line to betroth him, reader is struck with grief, ultimately venturing off deep into the forest where she knows nobody will follow her—somewhere forbidden. however, unbeknownst to her, a certain someone follows her trail…

ᥫ᭡ genre :: mature

ᥫ᭡ general tags :: 18+ (explicit sexual content, explicit language), angst, fluff

ᥫ᭡ content warnings :: characters aged up to 20, use of alcohol, inebriation, size kink (kinda), vaginal fingering, oral sex (f receiving), male masturbation, overstimulation, riding (no penetration), m/f ejaculation, squirting…i took some things out but i think that’s it?

ᥫ᭡ notes :: what a long week this has been…but we made it! i cannot believe the first thing i post after being on hiatus for months is blue alien sex. anyway, i hope you all enjoy. also, be mindful that the dialogue switches between formal and casual. it’s something that i noticed neteyam and kiri do a lot in the movie. for what reason? idk…but the big font after the read more is intentional bc ik some ppl complain that the small font hurts their eyes :3

ᥫ᭡ word count :: 7.2k

— playlist :: spotify link

“You have been wandering off by yourself a lot lately…” 

There goes that attentiveness, you could never put anything past her—Kiri, that is. She was just too good (to a fault), and though her keen eye and emotional intelligence were extremely useful, they were also the most aggravating traits about her. 

Now, you could just tell her the truth about the place you’re always wandering off to, and you also could confide in her about the thing that’s been plaguing your mind recently—but you don’t, because you know better.  

For a split second, though, you hesitate telling her. The lean girl tilts her head, eyes flitting between your face and the satchel in your hands. Smoothly, you pull the satchel across your body and shift it to rest behind you—out of sight. 

Kiri seems to notice your apprehension, and so, she peels her eyes from the bag, offering you her full attention by resuming eye contact once again. If she has even the slightest hunch that you’re hiding something, she doesn’t voice her suspicions.

“Well, I won’t pry, sister. You know that I am always here to listen,” she reassured, reaching out a gentle hand towards your face. You let the tips of her fingers graze your cheek, the warmth of her hand providing transitory comfort. 

The two of you exchange sweet smiles before you pull away. It was getting dark, and the longer you stayed here, the harder it’d be to avoid the very thing you were trying to get away from—the very person you were trying to get away from. 

“I know, Kiri,” you grabbed her hand, encasing it between your own, “I know…but—I have to go. I promise I’m alright. I’ve just…been doing some thinking, and I think I gotta sort some things out with myself before I can be around the rest of you, you know?” 

There’s a silence between the two of you, and you’re not exactly sure if she’s taken offense to what you’ve just said, or if she’s carefully choosing her words. You decide on the latter though, because the last thing you want to do is make her feel as if she’s done something wrong, or if anyone has done something wrong. This was entirely on you; you and your stupid, selfish human heart. 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” she replies, squinting her eyes. Again, there’s a silence, but you can tell she still has something to say, like she’s mulling it over. “Will you at least be here tonight? You know, for the big feast? Everyone will be here, even Neteyam,” the girl tsks playfully, shaking her head as she walks circles around you. 

Immediately your body stiffens, and she responds to this by teasing you, “Or, I could just save you something…or maybe i’ll ask Neteyam to save you something since he’ll be the most important man tonight.”

“And why would you do that?” the words leave your tongue before you have the chance to process them. It reads rather defensively, but you ignore it. “I mean, why—why ask Neteyam?” 

“Because he’s your friend…” kiri pokes you, “because you love him,” she whispers, only this time her voice is a lot more serious, a lot quieter—a whisper. This is when you get that feeling again. 

That weird, achy feeling that leaves your stomach in knots and your throat all puffy. The sensation is debilitating—suffocating, and the only way you know how to ease it is by doing what you had set out to do in the first place (though, you were swiftly interrupted).

“Don’t be silly, Kiri,” your smile drops solemnly, “we’re…friends, just friends. Besides, he’s going to be spoken for soon. There are a lot of Na’vi women who would make fine mates…” Your voice decrescendos into the forest night air, the conversation lasting a lot longer than you’d anticipated. To stop your solemn mood from being expressed outwardly, you quickly turn around, looking back once to speak.

“Anyway, I have to go now. I’ll see you later.” Kiri nods and waves bye, her eyes watching as your small frame disappears out of her family’s tent. 

A cacophony of voices and music fall on deaf ears as you make your way through the village. The preparation is beginning, but all you can think about is him. Him, him, him. 

And ever since you overheard a rumor that Neytiri and Mo’at had chosen the next in line to become tsahik after Neytiri, your heart stopped beating…because you knew. You knew exactly what this meant—the end.

Neteyam was to be a future olo’eyktan, after all. And in Na’vi culture, the future head of the clan and the future spiritual representative were to be betrothed. You knew that, and yet, you couldn’t fathom it. Because then it’d be the end. 

The end of your late night rendezvous, the end of your special talks, the end of your banter, and your clandestine glances—your whispers. The ones that were quiet, and innocent…the ones that tingled the shell of your ears. Meant for him and you only. 

It was selfish, really. Stupid. You knew the day would come when he’d have to grow up and fulfill his duties as a Na’vi male. Just not this soon though, you wanted to hold onto him a little longer. And if drinking your pain away to preserve those precious memories could do that, then you’d do it. 

Lost in your train of thought, you don’t register that you’ve walked yourself right into the heart of a crowd until you bump into a young na’vi child. Apologizing, you then attempt to squeeze through the sea of bodies, tapping lightly on people’s legs until you reach the front. The people were cheering, celebrating the hunters’ return and the game that the Great Mother had graciously given them. 

Slowly, hunters had begun pooling in from the forest on direhorseback. Then, they started coming in clusters, all ululating, and pumping their fists in the air while holding their dead game in the other. Your head turned in awe as each hunter rode past you, the energy of the people so contagious that your sour mood was starting to dissipate, even if just a little. 

Thinking that was the last of the riders, you begin walking again, but the sound of heavy hooves striking the ground halt your movements. Turning your head back to the trees, you see something moving behind the shrubbery, and then enters none other than the man of the hour: Neteyam. If the people weren’t cheering before, they were definitely cheering now—especially since he’d managed to catch an adult sturmbeest (which was a difficult feat). 

The direhorse strides slowly through the crowd, and stops in the centre on Neteyam’s command. Nobody can take their eyes off of him, and neither can you. He just looks so strong, and masculine—like his father, even though he’s the spitting image of his mother. Neteyam puts his hand into the air before he dismounts his horse and ushers the people to settle down, and eventually, they do. 

He points to the sturmbeest that his direhorse is carrying back to be prepared. “Tonight, my brothers and sisters…” a pause, “we dance! we sing! we feast!” His words excite the villagers again, uluations so loud that your ears begin to ring. Just as you’re about to turn away, his eyes meet yours—he smiles. And there it is. That achy feeling in your chest. 

He wants to say something, reaches his arm out to you as if he were silently telling you to wait up, but then a girl strikes up a conversation with him. At first, you’re not entirely sure who it is—and you shouldn’t even care—but then you do a double take and your heart sinks a little more. It was Tsimandi, the girl rumored to be his betrothed. 

From this distance, you can’t hear what they’re talking about, so you watch intently. He’s got his head thrown back in hearty laughter, and she’s touching him—actually touching him, her hands wrapped around his forearm in an attempt to pull him further away. 

You think if you stay a second longer you’ll actually become a pile of liquid where you stand, so you take this opportunity to slip away while he’s preoccupied. 

When Neteyam looks back, he notices your absence. Squinting, he looks around in search of you, and then he sees what looks like a person disappearing into the thick of the forest. Just what is she doing?

“I apologize, Tsimandi, but I must do something,” he begins backing away, a genuine expression etched onto his face, “I will see you tonight, at the feast!” 

“Oh, o-okay,” she mutters but he’s already run off. Neteyam calls for his direhorse and waits at the edge of the forest until it comes running towards him. Before he can mount it and follow you, someone calls out to him. 

“And where are you going?” the voice queries, tone laced with suspicion. He recognizes who it belongs to and sighs. 

“Nowhere, sir,” he dismounts, meeting his father’s eyes, his mother also accompanying him. 

“Yeah, I’d hope so. The people are throwing this feast for you, or have you forgotten?” Jake gives him a once over, eyes still boring into his son. 

“No, sir. I have not forgotten,” the boy lowers his gaze in embarrassment. 

“Good. Go get ready, knucklehead.”

With each trudge through the forest, you were losing more and more sunlight. You’d walked about halfway to your destination when you remembered the bottle sloshing around in your satchel. 

Usually, you waited to drink the liquid there, but you decided given today’s strenuous events, you’d have some now. A reward, you tell yourself. Taking the bottle out of the bag, you lift your mask from your face briefly, twisting open the top and taking a big swig. 

No matter how many times you did it, the taste always made you gag. Bourbon—is what they called it. It was equal parts bitter and pungent but it did the trick. Helped you to relax, to forget. The first time you came across it, it was by pure accident. 

You’d been somewhere you shouldn’t have been, doing things you shouldn’t have been doing. But one thing led to another, and soon enough, you were inebriated for the first time. 

By the time you drink half of your weight in liquor, you reach your destination. The old shack. After what happened with the Sky People, Jake’s first rule as olo’eyktan was to prohibit anyone from entering. 

Even being somewhere remotely around the area was forbidden. But you were no stranger to disobedience, you’d come here once with Lo’ak (which was your first time actually). 

Though, you didn’t get to explore much because Tuk had spoiled your fun by telling Jake. That day was one of your favorite memories, you think. Jake couldn’t stop yelling at the two of you, but all you could do was laugh. Nothing was really even funny, but you couldn’t help it. Seeing Jake’s eye twitch at your outburst only exacerbated it. 

Lo’ak was getting the worst of it, and Neteyam fell victim to Jake’s nagging too for not ‘being there’. After a while, he’d dismissed the bunch of you from his tent and as soon as you were out of earshot, the three of you went into a frenzy of laughter. You think back fondly on those memories, all the ones that include Neteyam, that is. 

“God, there isn’t a second when I’m not thinking of you…” you sigh in exhaustion, extending an arm out to open the shack’s door. Reaching in your satchel, you pull out two jars full of glow worms (you’ve found that two jars are enough to light up the shack). Ambling over to your favorite spot, you open a cabinet and reach for another bottle of that bitter liquid you willingly put into your body. 

It’s still a wonder to you how well preserved these bottles remained over the years, and you’re pretty sure you’ve heard Norm or someone mention that the older the liquor, the better it tastes (which was a lie, but alas, you down another shot). 

“Wooo,” a cough erupts from your throat, “yep, still nasty.” 

At this point, the liquor is starting to take effect. Warmth radiates throughout your entire body, and you can feel your limbs gradually getting heavier. Being drunk had to be one of your top three favorite feelings. 

It either made you: sad, tired, or giggly (maybe even all at once). But now? Now you were feeling sleepy, so you groggily trudge over to one of the beds in the shack. 

As soon as your body hits the plush, a cloud of dust filters through the air. It was incredibly disgusting, but you’d slept in worse places. For now, you would lay here…succumbing to a sweet slumber. 

Neteyam had gone home without fuss as promised. Go and get ready. Well, he was doing exactly that now, exchanging his previous attire for that of something more formal. He rolled his eyes and huffed. Sometimes his father could just be a…

“Son of a bitch,” the boy snapped, his frustration reaching its peak. He’d been standing in the tent for about 10 minutes trying to figure out this headpiece his mother had laid out for him, but could not for the life of him figure it out. 

Giving up, he throws it to the ground and takes a seat with his head in his hands. Kiri slips in shortly after his outburst, bending to the ground to retrieve the item. Hesitantly, she walks over to her brother. 

“If you needed some help, you could have called, brother.” Neteyam lifts his head up from his hands to see Kiri towering over him, his eyes breaking contact with hers as she sits down next to him. There’s a pregnant pause, but it doesn’t last for long because Kiri is already opening her mouth to speak.

“What is troubling you?” She asks, forcing Neteyam to turn his back to her so that she can place the headpiece onto him properly. He inhales deeply, then exhales.

“I do not know…I saw (your name) earlier and…” Kiri hums, encouraging him to continue, “and—she had this strange look on her face.” 

“Look? What do you mean? Was she angry? Sad?” 

“I have never seen it before, sister. She usually looks happy when she sees me…but this look was different,” his voice is almost inaudible when he finishes. Kiri ponders for a bit, tilting her head as if she were mentally putting the puzzle pieces together. 

“How come you did not speak to her?” Kiri makes her final adjustments to the headpiece, ushering Neteyam to meet her eyes. 

“I was going to…I tried to, but Tsimandi found me before I could,” he fiddles with his fingers. Kiri takes note of his disposition, and she frowns empathetically. Clearly, whatever was going on with you two was something you had to work out together. This wasn’t like either of you! 

“But it was not just today either,” he continues, “she has been distancing herself for awhile, have you noticed?” She laughs at this, nodding her head.

“Yes, she has been acting a little strange lately. I think I might know what is troubling her, brother,” the girl takes his hand into her own. “But I cannot tell you. This is something that concerns only she and you…”

Neteyam squints his eyes in confusion, muttering a ‘what’. His mouth opens to speak but he is swiftly interrupted upon Jake and Neytiri’s arrival. He looks to Kiri for some clarification but all she says is: ‘go, go, you have a feast to attend’, followed with a, ‘find her later’.

“Well? Come on, the people won’t wait for your blue ass all day will they?” Jake teases. Neytiri slaps his arm, scolding him playfully. 

“Ah, my son, my beautiful son,” she pads to where he stands, taking his face into her hands. “It is time to go, we must celebrate you.”

Jake nods, flashing a quick wink of approval. Together, they all walk out of the tent and through the village where they’re instantly greeted with colorful luminescence, loud music, and food. All things that have been so generously prepared for him. By the time they make it down to the Tree of Souls, everyone halts their cheering to hear what Jake has to say.

“Tonight we eat,” a pause, “in honor of Neteyam’s mighty victory!” Jake grabs his eldest son’s hand, raising it in the air. “He led his first attack against the Sky People and made it back without any casualties!” A sudden roar of praise erupts from the crowd. 

Everyone is chanting his name, and clapping, but even amidst all this praise, he can’t help but to think about you. What does all of this matter if you’re not here to celebrate with him? 

You’ve been by his side since the two of you could walk, so where are you now? The thought saddens him, but he can’t wear his heart on his sleeve tonight. Not when there’s so many people here just for him. 

“For the past 20 years, my son has always been just a boy to me. But now I realize…he is a man—and he has proven himself in front of the eyes of Eywa,” The former marine glances down at his son, eyeing him in admiration. “Enough talking, let us feast!”

Laughter and songs fill the warm, breezy nighttime air. It’s been about two hours since the celebration commenced, and Neteyam has just about made his rounds to every important family. 

He smiles warmly as he looks at the scene in front of him: children playing and dancing by the fireside, putting on elaborate performances for the adults still filling their bellies full of food. Everyone is lively—happy, a testament to tonight’s success. 

Mo’at is pleased by this especially, she tells him that ‘this is what the people needed’—you know, to boost morale. At some point, when nobody is watching, he slips away from the party to walk around. Unbeknownst to him, someone has seen him. 

“Getting tired?” a voice questions from the shadows. Out comes Kiri, revealing herself from behind a leaf. 

“Yes, exhausted actually,” he jokes, disconnecting his braid from his direhorse. “No, but I need to find (your name). She has not come back and it is dark.”

“I figured you would leave early, that’s why I covered your ass and told Dad you were not feeling well,” the feline-like girl smirks. 

“Do you have an idea where she might be?” 

Kiri takes a moment before answering, “I’m not sure…but for some reason, I have a hunch that she’s at the old shack,” Neteyam furrows his brows in confusion. 

“Why do you think she’s there?” he queries, “I mean, it is forbidden.” Kiri offers him a shrug.

“I don’t know but if you’re going to find her, do it now while dad still thinks you’re not feeling well.”

With that, he thanks her for the intel and mounts his horse, disappearing into the thick of the forest. On the way there, his mind conjures up just about every possible scenario that might explain your absence. 

Were you upset with him? Did he do something or say something that you didn’t like? He wishes he could just read your thoughts because right now, his heart is pounding so rapidly within the confines of his chest, that he thinks it’ll explode. 

This wasn’t like you two, everything was always so easygoing. Being with you was easy, like breathing. But this? His heart couldn’t handle this. Yeah, there’s been some distance between the two of you recently but not due to his own volition—it was duty. If he could spend every second of his life by your side, just being kids, laughing with you, playing with you, he would. 

He’s trying to recount these last few days, weeks—months. Trying to pinpoint when exactly things got like this between you…pinpoint when you stopped smiling at him with that smile that made his head all fuzzy, and his heart race like a kid running for the first time. 

“Ah, everything’s going to shit, buddy,” he sighs, rubbing the side of his horse, “I don’t know what is wrong.” His mammalian companion grunts empathetically, stopping in its tracks at the edge of the forest when it sees the abandoned link shack. Neteyam doesn’t bother scolding her, because even the animals know that this place is forbidden. 

“Alright, I will see you later, okay? Stay here,” he pats her, disconnecting the bond. From this distance, he can see that there seems to be some sort of light illuminating from inside the shack. 

That alone already confirms Kiri’s hunch. The closer he gets, the more his stomach feels uneasy. He doesn’t even know why he’s nervous, but he attempts to ease his mind (and body) by telling himself that it’s only you. He’s talked to you one on one hundreds of times, so what’s the difference now?

Noises in the distance rouse you from your ephemeral repose. When you stand up, your head spins with the room, causing you to instinctively reach out for the nearest surface available. Whatever was outside had better be non-threatening, because you were not in the condition to be fighting—let alone standing. When you were drunk like this, you couldn’t even hurt a fly. 

“Fuck, I’m gonna have the worst headache soon,” you huff quietly, still aware that there might be someone or something outside. The noise is getting closer, and you’re running out of time to find a hiding spot. 

Quickly, you grab the closest thing you can to defend yourself (which is literally a jar of glow worms), and crouch down below the window. When you lift your head just enough to see outside, the makings of a silhouette cloud your vision. 

“Shit, shit, shit,” you whisper-yell, tightening your hold on the jar. Lifting your head up again, you notice that the figure is not in the spot it was previously. Then, the knob to the shack twists, and now it’s opening, and—

“(Your name)?” 

You pause your attack, slowly dropping your hand (that’s holding the jar) to your side. A flood of relief washes over you once you register who the voice belongs to. Rising from the ground, you open the door fully to see Neteyam standing in the doorway. 

“I almost killed you, you know!” you raise the jar, pulling him inside of the shack. 

“I think it would take more than a jar of worms to kill me,” he teases. Rolling your eyes, you continue ushering him further inside, leading him to an area where you can sit and talk. 

“What…what are you doing here?” you finally ask, folding your arms across your chest. Neteyam towers over you from this height, so he accommodates you by dropping to his haunches. 

“I was worried about you,” the boy confesses, “what are you doing here? Why were you not at the feast?” Suddenly, you don’t really feel like talking anymore. Even though the adrenaline from before was still pumping through your veins, so was the alcohol in your system. You’re not so sure you’d be able to keep your composure long enough to answer without exposing your truest feelings. So, you decide on deflecting. 

“Aren’t you the man of the hour? I think you should go back to the party before daddy throws a fit. We both know how he gets when his perfect little son isn’t at his every beck and call…” As soon as the words spill from your tongue, you wince. It came out meaner than you meant, and the last thing you wanted was to give him shit for being a caring friend. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t—I didn’t mean that,” you apologize, sitting down on the bed. All he does is sigh, but he takes this opportunity to enter your space, gets all close until his body is nestled between your legs. 

“I know…I know, but I want you to tell me what’s wrong, hm?” his fingers lift your chin, “so I can fix it.” 

“Can’t fix this, ‘Teyam,” a saltine droplet ribbons down your face. Your head is tilted up with his fingers, but you can’t even force yourself to meet his gaze. God, how pathetic did you look right now? 

Here you were, inside an abandoned shack, drinking your body weight in liquor…all while a celebration was being thrown in your best friend’s honor. And for what? Because you were jealous? Because you liked him—loved him? 

You knew that eventually your relationship would shift. That he’d take on his duties as the future olo’eyktan, and you’d just be his human friend he hangs with from time to time. How stupid could you be to think things would stay like this forever?

“Hey, hey, hey,” he soothes, both hands now cupping your cheeks, “don’t do that. Do not shut me out. We’re not like this, (your name), you used to always talk to me about things.”

Things. You’d talk about things. But those things were not like these things. And if he knew what things you were thinking about, the things that involved him…then you two would never talk about things again. 

You’re curious, though. What if you just told him? Just told him about all the days you’ve loved him, all the nights you’ve stayed up thinking of him—all the stars you counted wishing for him? At least then, the burden of keeping such a secret would stop weighing so heavy on your heart. 

“I..” a breath, “I heard a rumor.” The boy hums, encouraging you to continue. “I heard your mother has chosen her successor.”

“Is that what this is about? Why does this bother you?”

“Because you know what this means! We both know what this means, don’t be dense, ’Teyam,” you droop your head in sorrow, coaxing him to just lift it back up. Only this time, his hold on your face is a lot firmer. His eyes are fiercer.

“No. I don’t, so just tell me.”

“You’re gonna be the future olo’eyktan, and we both know that the future clan leader and the chosen tsahik are to be betrothed,” you start, “there will be no time for me! No more late night talks, no more exploring, no more secret whispers…I mean, I get it, you have duties to fulfill but…I wanna be selfish a little longer. Can’t I be selfish a little longer?”

You say the last line while meeting his gaze. You’re teary eyed and shaking, but you try your best to keep any semblance of composure you have left intact (though, it’s failing). His expression is indiscernible. 

It makes you nervous. Sick. And now you’re forcing yourself not to throw up because…the realization that you just told someone your deepest, truest, most vulnerable feelings makes you physically ill. 

“Oh, god, I’m sorry. Forget what I jus—“

“Are you serious? You don’t get it do you?” Neteyam’s head falls forward, a little chuckle slipping past his lips. His hands leave your head and slither down to your hands. He takes them into his own, eyeing you while kissing the knuckles of each. 

The act is incredibly intimate, sends white-hot electricity down the column of your spine. Renders you speechless. All you can do is sit there, too scared that if you move or speak, you’ll shatter into a million little pieces. 

“I have duties, yes…but my heart is already spoken for. Always has been.” 

“What are you saying, ’Teyam,” your head snuggles into the warmth of his hand. You know exactly what he’s saying, but you want to hear him say—

“I see you,” he whispers in your ear, “you are my most beloved.” The warmth of his breath tingles the shell of your ear, it takes the strength of a thousand men to not scream. 

But in this moment? In this moment you want to kiss him. You want to kiss him silly, actually, but you quickly remember the thing on your face preventing your lips from connecting with his. There are truly evil forces conspiring against you.

“I want to kiss you,” you admit solemnly. 

“Oh, you don’t know how many nights I’ve spent dreaming about kissing you. Too many,” he jokes, “but I’m afraid if we remove this, you’ll die.” 

“Then you don’t have to kiss my lips,” a silence, “you can kiss me anywhere you’d like. Anywhere.” 

His green eyes flitter between your face and your body, and then his hands are on you, forcing you to lay back against the bed. You lift your head up and lean back onto your elbows, watching through lust-filled eyes as he begins his ministrations. 

He starts from the bottom, works his way up real slowly—too slowly. He’s showing restraint, and while you appreciate the fact that he’s worshiping your body like a devoted follower worships their deity, you want him to ravage you. To eat you up until there’s nothing left but bones. 

“’Teyam, please…” you breathe out impatiently. Like the cocky-brat he is, he ignores your pleas, only laughing into your skin. 

“Shh, be calm.” The plush of his lips trail up the plains and pastures of your body, up your calves, your thighs (he spends the most time there), and then comes to a stop at the crest of your breasts. His fingers fiddle with the cloth covering your chest, lightly tracing the edges that rest just beneath your mounds. 

A tease is what he is. And you didn’t have the time for a tease, so you figured you’d help speed up the process by removing it. Sitting up, you untie the makeshift top and let it fall to your lap, smirking deviously as if you’ve done something so naughty. 

“Thought I’d help you,” you grin, wrapping your hands around his neck, “Please, no more going slow…I think we’ve been going slow for twenty years, don’t you think?” 

And he gets the hint, once again resuming his assault on your body, but this time with more fervor. More urgency. He’s kissing you everywhere, licking wet stripes over your chest, and leaving love bites in the places where he’s kissed you. Right now he’s acting on his most basic, primal instincts—he’s claiming you as his mate—in the only way he knows how to. 

The feeling of his hands on your neck, back, thighs and waist send you into oblivion. But then his hands are creeping up to your tits, deft fingers twisting and kneading, and oh god, you’re seeing stars. The addition of his mouth doesn’t help either.

“You’re so,” a kiss, “beautiful,” a suck, “perfect.” Neteyam kneads one breast while his mouth works on another. He plops down onto a pert nipple, using his tongue to draw circles around the area, his saliva acting as a salve. 

A moan (that comes out more like a disgruntled sigh) vacates your throat, and his eyes widen in excitement. The sight of his tail swaying in the background makes you giggle. Cute, you think. 

Even though what the two of you were doing wasn’t innocent, you couldn’t help but to feel all giddy. Reaching a hand out, you place a gentle palm on the side of his face. 

You trace the contours of his nose, his cheekbones, smooth over his jaw, and then stop at his lips. Your thumb grazes them, first the top, then the bottom—learning. Committing them to memory, how they look, feel, and move under your thumb. 

Neteyam is unmoving while you continue to run your finger across his lips—save for his hand, which slowly begins traveling south to your thighs. Experimentally, you push your thumb inside of his mouth, pressing the digit down on his tongue before tracing his cat-like canines. This moment is particularly special, because now it’s you who’s doing the admiring. 

The free hand that’s not inching towards your core, skillfully removes the loin cloth around your hips. Immediately, he’s met with your bare sex. It’s smooth—wet, so incredibly wet that it has his cock twitching, and his hands eager to touch you. He wants to taste you. Feel you, all of you. 

“I—,” a slender finger rubs your slit, “mmf, see you,” you mewl, cupping his cheek. Neteyam’s eyes widen, he wants to hear you make that sound again…and again, and again, and—

The boy repeats the action. Watches your abs flex and tremble from the touch, and your thighs close in on his arm. Using the other hand, he gently pulls them apart and leaves three open-mouthed kisses: one on your inner thigh, one on another, and then a final one at the top of your mound. The heat from his nostrils make you full body shiver; suddenly, being the only one completely bare is slightly bothering you. 

“Do not cover yourself. I want to see you,” his hand finds your cunt again, a long finger pushing into you ever so slowly, “…want to hear those sweet sounds again.” 

A soft sigh leaves your lips as you watch his digit push further into you, the drag of a knuckle against your slick walls aiding in the pleasure. You can’t help but to wince at the intrusion, because shit, this was a lot more than what you were used to—using your fingers, that is. 

You also suppose penetration would be off the table considering humans and Na’vi were never meant to mate, but it doesn’t prevent you from fantasizing about it anyway. How big was it? Did he touch himself? Use his hands and picture yours? 

The thought of him hunching over, rubbing one out, all slick with sweat and pre has your head all dizzy. Your mouth is practically salivating at the mental image you’ve conjured up in your head of him fucking your face, but you know it would never fit. There really are evil forces conspiring against you…

Neteyam’s finger reaching the hilt brings you back down to reality. A forceful thrust that coaxes you to gasp sharply and grab his forearm. After patiently waiting for you to adjust to his size, he begins to move. He sets a steady rhythm, pulling out slowly, then pushing back into you with the same velocity. 

Eventually, his movements become less hesitated, and more calculated. Instead of steady and slow, he begins increasing the pace of his thrusts, then graduates from speed to incorporating force. 

Every delve of his finger, every deliberate drag and prod has fire pooling in the depths of your belly. Squelches and whimpers ricochet off of the metal walls, and fuck, his dick won’t stop twitching. 

It’s grown considerably harder in these past few minutes, and all from just hearing you vocalize your pleasure. When the stretch stops feeling like a stretch, and starts feeling like a ‘give me more’, that’s when you encourage him to add another. And of course, he indulges you. 

The same time he pushes another finger in, is the same time he starts rubbing himself. He’s not even really aware of it at first, it’s mindless. He’s just so entranced by you, and the sounds you’re making, the things you’re saying, the way your cunt’s sucking in his fingers—

Fuck. He just finished all over himself. He doesn’t let that deter him though, keeps fingering you through his post-orgasm, taking care of you until you come undone on his fingers. 

And the sight is amazing, he can’t stop gawking at the way your hole flutters around him, and the nectar-like liquid that drips down the length of his fingers and onto the bed. He wants to taste it. 

“Can I taste you?” he asks. You’re in such a daze that the question doesn’t even register, suddenly too preoccupied with breathing like you’ve forgotten how to. 

“Huh? Wha—ohhhh.” His tongue licks a long stripe up your slit. He concentrates the tip at the bottom, lapping at the essence that leaks from there, and then circles back to your puffy bud. Experimentally, he prods it with his fingers, rubbing it in tantalizingly slow circles. 

The combination of his tongue and his fingers almost feel overwhelming, you feel like a puppet on a marionette with the way he’s maneuvering your legs around for better access. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was a starved man. 

His mouth is slick with drool, and his hands are pressing down so firmly onto your thighs, that you’re sure a handprint will be there for you to discover in the morning. His tongue feels so good on you, so nasty. 

The picture is obscene, unlike anything you’ve ever witnessed before. But the thing that’s really getting to you are the sounds he’s making. Grunts and groans, expletives and mumbles. ‘So good’, ‘perfect’, ‘beautiful’…it has your head spinning and your fists gripping for the sheets beneath you. 

There’s a knot in your abdomen pulled taut like a string of twine. You can feel it twisting and pulling, ready to come undone at the drop of a pin. The more he works on your slit, the more the temperature rises in the shack. 

Was the room always spinning? Did your body always run this hot? It feels like you’ve been thrown into a furnace, and the only source of coolness is the wetness that his tongue provides. 

“‘M gonna, mmf, ’s too much!” you jab at his hand in an attempt to push him away. He’s relentless though, still sucking harshly, and teasing, ramming his thick fingers up against your gummy walls. 

It feels different than when you touch yourself, more intense. Like something’s sitting heavy on your bladder. Then, snap. The string in your abdomen unravels, bringing forth a flood of ecstasy. 

“’Teyam!” you sob, back arching to the ceiling. When he pulls his fingers out, a stream of clear liquid seeps from your cunt. He’s awestruck, staring in admiration as your sweat kissed chest rises and falls rhythmically. 

“Look, your legs are shaking,” he points, biting down a laugh, “why are they shaking?” 

“Oh my god, shut up!” you feign offense, pushing him backwards with a chuckle. He pretends to be wounded, rubbing his back dramatically, ‘oohing’ and ‘owing’ as he does so. When you finally sit up, your eyes naturally fall to his loincloth, a wet ringlet contrasting starkly against the beige textile. 

“Hey…” your voice is hesitant, but teetering on the edge of curiosity, “Can I try something?” 

The boy silently nods his approval, shifting his position on the ground when you amble over to him. A look of confusion molds onto his face following the events that involve you plopping down onto his lap and laying him down. He goes to speak but you interrupt him. 

“Your turn, right? Can’t put it in, but…I can still make you feel good,” you say, tugging on the piece of fabric that separates your sex from his. Eagerly, he removes it for you and lets the item fall haphazardly to the ground. 

It’s big, so big—and pretty too. A beautiful blue hue that matches the rest of his body, paired along with a blushing teal tip that’s oozing pre. You want to know what he tastes like on your tongue…

“So pretty.”

Heat rises to his cheeks, and his tail takes an aquiline form, quivering in rapid movements. His usual, over-confident disposition was slowly dissipating under your intense gaze, and you reveled in it by mocking his bashfulness. 

“Awe, the little kitty’s shy,” you mock, tickling his side. 

“Stop it, I don’t look like those Earth things,” he laughs, pushing your hand away, but to no avail. You continue to dodge his attempts to stop you, tickling him here and there until he accidentally bucks and pulls you down against him. Embarrassingly, you let a whine fall from your lips…still too sensitive down there, you guess. 

There’s a shit-eating grin plastered on his face now, you hate it. “Who’s making noises like a kitty now, huh?” With this, he takes the liberty to do it again, pressing you down hard against his length. 

The feeling of your bare cunt against him is electrifying, probably (definitely) not better than him being inside you, but the next best thing. This was supposed to be your thanks to him. But now he’s taken full charge—maneuvering you back and forth, gripping and kneading—it’s cruel.  

For someone who’s never mated with anyone in his life, he’s sure moving you around like he has. His hands are all over you—thighs, hips, waist, breasts, it’s almost overwhelming. Every touch, addled with the buck of hips, brings forth a new sensation that is better than the last. You think this would be a good way to go out, right on his cock. One last hurrah before the morbid inevitable. 

“You f-feel so good, (your name),” his voice is breathy, “r-really good.” Neteyam’s grip on your arms is vice, partly because he can feel his climax approaching, but mostly because he can tell you’re growing tired. 

Swiftly, he changes your positions to where you’re laying on your back and he’s crouching over you. The tip of his head smoothes over your folds when he pushes up, and before he draws back, you can see just about where his dick would rest if he were inside of you. 

“I’d be all the way up here,” he presses down just beneath your breastbone, “you’re so tiny.” It sounds so dirty, but you know ultimately he’s just making an observation—regardless, the comment has your stomach churning in excitement. 

The both of you watch in fascination as he sheathes himself up and over your cunt, moaning in unison when the tip of his mushroomy head catches against your bud. Euphoric, he thinks. He never imagined that something could feel this good, let alone without connecting bonds. 

Still sensitive from earlier, it doesn’t take too long for you to reach your peak. Neteyam knows that your arrhythmic breathing is a tell-tale sign, and he helps you get there by cooing words of encouragement. 

He goes back and forth between ’I got you’s and ‘it’s okay’s, leaving trails of kisses down your body in his wake. The second you finish, you’re pulling him down onto you tight. Moaning and whining into his ear, whispering those same words of encouragement that he whispered to you prior.

“So good, ‘Teyam,” you claw at his back, “keep going, want you to feel good too.” And he does. Unrelenting in his attack against your sex, he comes with a few more pistons. 

You eagerly welcome him into your arms when he drops from exhaustion, and hold him there until your erratic breaths synchronize. The both of you are disgustingly sweaty and sticky, but even so, you feel at peace. 

You bask in the tranquil quietness of the night, just staring at each other. Soft caresses and soothing hums. Then, Neteyam speaks. 

“On this fateful night, two hearts danced…” he whispers, grabbing your hand to hold it over his heart. 

“What does this mean?” you smile at him. He ponders over it and then explains. 

“My songcord…I want to tell this story,” he starts, “the night when two hearts became one.” 

A crystal droplet cascades down your face, “that sounds beautiful.”

© arachine 2022

[domjaehyun]

the boy is mine (l.dh) — part six

PAIRING. haechan x fem!reader GENRES. smut, angst WORD COUNT. 8.6k CONTENTS. infidelity, alcohol & weed consumption (MC is a non-smoker if that matters to you), explicit smut (dirty talk, fingering, finger sucking, oral (receiving), rimming (receiving), groping/frottage, marking, spit play, (brief) ear play, breast play, creampies/unprotected sex (if you explicitly need me, a stranger on the internet, to tell you not to fuck raw, you are not responsible enough to be reading this. move along now), snowballing, public sex, car sex, riding, bratty dom-leaning switch!haechan, bratty sub-leaning switch!reader, sweet dom!jeno, face riding, handjob, overstimulation (receiving), praise kink (receiving), light degradation kink (giving), mating press, morning sex) NOTES. here’s part six! thank you so much for reading this far!!! i hope you enjoy it!! please leave feedback if you liked it :) i would also greatly appreciate tips if you really liked it :3 THANK YOU LIKE THE HUUUUUGEST THANK YOU TO BRI (@jalitepng) FOR BETA READING THIS BIG OL FIC :D  PLAYLIST. the boy is mine - ariana grande // fantasize - ariana grande (unreleased) // lowkey (feat. erykah badu) - teyana taylor // agora hills - doja cat // pussy is mine - miguel // softest touch - khalid // cut - tori kelly // seatbelt - josh levi // often - doja cat // surrender - nbdy

You wake up abruptly to the sound of your phone ringing, and you reach over to answer the call, bringing the device to your ear. “Hello?” you rasp out, groggy as can be.

“Thank God you finally woke up! Listen, Winter’s on her way to your house.” Chaewon says in a panic, and you yawn, shrugging.

“Okay?”

“She’s on her way over there because Haechan broke up with her.” Chaewon says slowly enough for it to process in your freshly roused mind, and you sit up straight in your bed, now fully awake and alarmed.

“Oh, shit. Did he—”

“He told her about you two.” she confirms, and you curse under your breath, messing with your hair anxiously.

“What exactly did he tell her?” you say slowly, and from the hesitation on the other end, you know it’s not good. “Chae, tell me.”

“He told her you two have been fooling around for a while and that he can’t hold back anymore and keep pretending and he said he doesn’t want to be with her anymore.” she blurts out, and you gasp.

“When was this? What the fuck? Why wouldn’t he run it by me first—” you mutter, worriedly stumbling out of bed and starting to fix your appearance in the mirror of your vanity.

“It seemed like it was eating away at him, honestly.” Seulgi pipes up from the background, and you sigh in defeat. “He must really like you.”

“Yeah, or really not like her.” you mumble bitterly, flinching harshly at the sound of a fist pounding on your front door. “I gotta go—she’s here—”

“I know you’re in there!” Winter shrieks through the door, and you freeze mid-stride, not sure what the best course of action might be. “Why would you do this to me?” she cries, and your heart twists painfully as regret swims through you.

You silently pad to the door, placing your hand on the doorknob before retracting it and shaking your head to yourself. You already know what Winter looks like when she cries; an adorable kicked puppy, and you have no desire to see that face when you’re the one who caused it.

“I should have known by the way he looks at you.” she sniffles, and you swallow a thick lump in your very dry throat. “He never looked at me like that.”

You try to speak, but your voice is so hoarse from just waking up and the remorse practically clogging your throat that the sounds barely register as a faint squeak. Thankfully for you, Winter doesn’t seem to hear your attempt at a remark, the heartbroken girl crying softly on the other end.

“Now you won’t even answer me? That’s just great.” she remarks bitterly, and you look at the doorknob as if you’re expecting it to unlock itself magically and let Winter in to unleash a can of whoop-ass on you.

“Y’know, I really thought you were my friend.” she says softly, her voice cracking on the last word. “If it wasn’t obvious, I don’t ever want to hear from you again.”

You quietly rest your forehead on the door, eyes sliding shut as a hot, guilty tear threatens to slip past your closed lids.

“I hope you two are happy together.” Winter scoffs, a thud from the other end telling you she’s kicked your door in frustration. After what feels like ages of silence, you peek through the peephole to see her entering the elevator at the end of your hall and let out a tortured sigh of defeat.

You slowly start to drag yourself throughout your apartment, the guilt weighing you down like shackles as you get ready for work, only to be interrupted by a hesitant knock on your door.

When you look through the peephole, your heart speeds up in panic as you see a dejected-looking Jeno standing on the other side of your door. 

You take a deep breath and pull your door open, offering a feeble smile that, you notice with a pang, he struggles to return.

“Hi,” Jeno greets, despondent as he shifts to lean against your doorway.

“Hey,” you say slowly. 

“I heard.” he explains, and you nod, swallowing thickly. “I noticed Winter left the group chat, then when I asked her why, she told me I should ask you.”

You wince in anticipation of his next words. “So you came to ask me what happened?”

“No, she told me what happened.” Jeno clarifies. “I came because I have a different question.”

“Oh,” you mumble, moving back to let him into your apartment. “Well, do you want to come in to ask?”

He seems to think about it for a moment before shaking his head with a sad smile. “I’d rather not.”

Ouch. You try to hide your saddened expression by scratching at the side of your nose, but you’re not sure you were successful because Jeno’s expression shifts to guilt for a moment and you hate it. You hate that even when he’s coming to you from a place of hurt, he’s found it in himself to be selfless and care about you. 

“That’s fair,” you say too quickly after an awkward pause. “I respect it. What was your question?”

He looks uncomfortable now, shifting his weight from foot to foot before finally asking, “I was just wondering if, um… if you entertained me, I guess, as a distraction from him?”

Your eyes widen. “Jeno, no.”

“Was it to get back at him?” he asks hoarsely, and you shake your head vehemently.

“Not at all.”

“Did it mean… anything to you?” His voice cracks on the last word, and he averts his gaze, thumbing at his nose.

“Jeno, I always had a little thing for you, even before I met Haechan. I did—do like you, I really do! I just—” you rush to explain, but Jeno cuts you off with a hand raised in a silent request for you to stop talking.

“You just… like Haechan more.” he says with a sad sort of acceptance and understanding that breaks your heart.

“Jeno, I am so sorry.” you whisper. “I don’t expect you to forgive me—”

“But I want to.”

“But you don’t have to.” you assure him. “It was never my intent to make you feel used, so I am so sorry I did.”

“It’s o–” he starts, but you shush him.

“Don’t say it’s okay until you’ve had time to think about it.” you insist.

“Yeah… yeah, I think I do need time,” he slowly agrees. “I just need to, like, get over this because,” he lets out a humorless laugh, “I really liked you.”

You’re not gonna lie; the past tense hurts you to hear. You do your best to take it on the chin with a small nod and apologetic smile, but look away to prevent Jeno from noticing the glassy shine of your eyes.

“I’m sorry, again, and I’m even more sorry for this, but I kind of have to finish getting ready for work.” you say carefully, and Jeno’s eyes flash with realization before he’s nodding and backing away from your door. 

“No problem, I’ll, uh… see you around, I guess.” he says with an awkward wave before turning and heading to your elevator and pressing the button. 

Shutting the door, you take a deep, shaky breath before wiping the single tear that you failed to hold back and continuing to get ready.

Apparently, there really isn’t any rest for the wicked, because as you’re now rushing to get ready for work after your horrible start to your morning, your doorbell rings.

“With my luck, it’s gonna be some goons Winter sent to beat me up,” you lament sadly as you walk to your door and peek through the peephole.

To your surprise and sudden onset irritation, Haechan is standing at your door, hands clasped behind his back and teeth nibbling his bottom lip nervously.

You fling open your door and stare at him, incredulous and outraged with your hand on your hip, and he winces.

“I’m guessing you heard the news,” he says sheepishly, and you just stare at him, slowly simmering in your fury.

“You… ruined… everything.” you say slowly, and he frowns. “You—I—first of all, Winter and Jeno have already stopped by here to give me a piece of their mind, so I really feel like the Worst Person in the World right now.”

His eyes widen. “You talked to Winter?”

“She talked at me through my front door because I was too much of a coward to open it,” you mutter bitterly, and he frowns deeply. “She hates me now, as you might imagine.”

“I didn’t mean for that to happen,” he says quietly, and you scoff.

“Doesn’t really matter now, does it?” you huff. “You weren’t supposed to tell her you were dumping her for me! You were just supposed to break up with her without bringing me into it! Why wouldn’t you run this by me first?”

“Well—I didn’t think about that,” he stammers.

You scowl. “And this is why you should have brought it up to me first. So I wouldn’t have woken up to being blindsided by being blocked and verbally dragged through the mud by your rightfully scorned ex-girlfriend and my ex-friend—and then being guilt-tripped to the maximum as I apologize profusely to the absolutely wounded sweetheart that was Jeno Lee in my apartment earlier for, essentially, leading him on and breaking his little puppy heart.”

Haechan looks pained. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. Really, honestly.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose and breathe in and out deeply. “What possessed you to do that?”

“It just kinda… blurted out. I felt like I couldn’t stop, and once I’d started talking, it was too late to take any of it back.” he says hesitantly.

“I should have known this would end badly,” you moan in anguish, and you miss the look of hurt Haechan shoots you.

“End?” he asks, but you’ve already moved on to your next topic.

“I should have known when you met me and your first instinct was to lie to me—”

“I explained myself back then!”

“—and pretend you didn’t have a girlfriend. You didn’t seem to have a hard time withholding that information, did you?”

“That’s not fair,” he replies hoarsely, and you can’t bring yourself to look at him.

“She told me she hates me, I’m a terrible friend, and she never wants to see me again.” you whisper sadly. “And she’s right! I am a terrible friend, and she should hate me and never want to see me again.”

“In your defense, you were only a bad friend to her; you’re not a bad friend overall.” Haechan adds in an attempt to be helpful, but he balks when you glower at him.

“‘Bad friend’ might be subjective, but you know what’s not? ‘Homewrecker.’” you counter. “I might as well have the words ‘dirty man stealer’ written on my forehead because by the time word gets around, that’s all everyone’s gonna know me as.”

“Please stop catastrophizing,” Haechan tries to comfort you, reaching forward to take your hand, but you pull back slightly, folding your arms over your chest and looking down at your feet to avoid the wounded look you know Haechan’s sporting right now. “Listen,” he says firmly, and you huff. “I didn’t do all this—didn’t come this far just to lose you. I broke up with her for you. I broke up with her to be with you. You think, after getting to know me, that I’m just gonna stop trying to get you to let me in?”

“This is just—Haechan, it’s too risky—I’m so scared—” you whimper, and he places his hands on your shoulders, drawing your attention to his concerned expression.

“This is the type of risk you should be taking!” Haechan insists. “Give me time to gain your trust.”

“Haechan, you’re the most risky part about all of this! You cheated on your last girlfriend!”

Hurt flashes across his face for a moment, but he doesn’t release you. “So are you saying ‘once a cheater, always a cheater?’ Are you saying that I sealed my fate as a cheater and don’t deserve a chance at love and happiness?”

“Well, no, I’m saying this is all just… a very high-risk situation… that I’m not sure I can handle.” you say carefully, but apparently, you weren’t careful enough, because he steps back in surprise, recoiling almost as if you’d slapped him.

“I’m too risky.” he says slowly, realization and hurt creeping into his expression.

You hate to see him like this, but you can’t take back anything you’ve said, and, unfortunately, you are very much in a time crunch, as an alarm on your phone reminds you, ringing loudly to give you your warning to head out.

“Haechan, I— I have work in like an hour, I have to go—” you plead, pushing between his shoulder blades to usher him out of your apartment. When you’re both standing outside, Haechan turns to look at you with an expression not unlike that of a kicked puppy, and you’re starting to get a little fed up with everyone having that expression when it comes to you..

“So we’re not gonna finish talking about this?” he pleads, and you shake your head vehemently, inching closer and closer to the elevator door.

“We’re gonna talk about this,” you promise him, finally pressing the elevator button once you’re in reach of it, and he frowns deeply. “Just not right now.” 

The door opens a moment after, to your relief, but Haechan just remains rooted in place, you would guess due to being frozen with shock.

“Are you not coming?” you ask slightly impatiently, pulling up train times on your phone and sucking your teeth before opening the Uber app.

“I’m trying to figure out whatever this was that just happened.” Haechan responds loudly enough that you can hear him, but not so loud that he’s blasting your conversation to the ears of all your neighbors.

“Is that a no?” you stress, trying your best to emphasize the fact that you’re holding the elevator door open for him.

“It’s a no,” he confirms, a hint of sadness and defeat in his voice, and your heart pangs as you release the “Door Open” button on the elevator and the doors slide shut.

As the elevator descends to the ground floor, your heart makes a similar journey, sinking to what feels like the pit of your stomach and leaving you feeling desolate and almost hopeless as you fidget impatiently waiting for your Uber.

Even as your Uber driver pulls up in a sleek white Venza and you climb in and exchange pleasantries, you keep thinking about the look on Haechan’s face when you told him you were leaving. 

You will talk it out with him—you’ll make sure of that. But first, you need to clear your mind and organize your thoughts, and that can’t happen with him standing right in front of you.

“I just want to know what exactly you were thinking,” Seulgi sighs disappointedly. “Like, the whole time—did you just think you could keep seeing him behind her back forever?” she asks, and you wince.

“I wasn’t thinking about her.” you admit quietly, and Seulgi scoffs.

“Clearly! What you did was selfish—reckless—irresponsible, stupidly inconsiderate—”

“I get it.” you cut in gruffly.

“I don’t!” Seulgi exclaims, throwing her hands up in frustration. Yunjin catches your eye from her arm chair and something about the sympathetic gaze in her eyes brings you closer and closer to breaking down. “You weren’t thinking about her, obviously, so what were you thinking about?”

“I don’t know—”

“Yes, you do.” Seulgi says sternly.

“I don’t—”

“You do!”

“I was thinking about him, okay?” you snap, and she pauses, stunned. “I can’t explain myself, but the whole time, all I thought about was him, and how much I—” your voice catches in your throat and you stop talking to collect yourself.

“How much you… ?” Chaewon asks, and it’s the first time she’s spoken, a cursory glance in her direction revealing that she’s looking at you just as gently as Yunjin is, making the backs of your eyes hotter than before.

“How much I like him,” you confess in a wail, and Yunjin moves from her seat to sit beside you, pulling you into her embrace as you sniffle. “I like him so much, guys. He walks into a room and I, like, can’t look away. It’s like he’s magnetic or something, or like—like—” you stammer and Yunjin places her hand on yours gently.

“Like you might be falling in love with him?” she asks softly, and you freeze before fresh tears well up in your eyes and threaten to spill over.

“Like that,” you agree pathetically, tucking your head into her neck sadly, and she tuts sympathetically, resting her cheek on the top of your head as she continues to hug you. 

“I just—” Seulgi starts before taking a deep breath and restarting with a significantly gentler tone, “I don’t understand when this started exactly.”

You take a deep breath and look at Yunjin, the two of you exchanging meaningful glances.

“You know the welcome home party we had when I came back from Oxford?” you attempt to jog her memory, and she looks thoughtful before nodding. “Remember my party crush that disappeared?” you continue, and she nods again, her eyes widening at your expectant expression as you wait for her to put two and two together. 

“It was him?” she asks in a whisper, and you nod.

“I didn’t know at first—”

“I had to tell her,” Yunjin butts in, coming to your defense, and your heart warms with gratitude for your friend. “She didn’t want anything to do with him, but I guess he wasn’t done with her.”

“Well, don’t paint him as this cunning, evil mastermind,” you say carefully, frowning. “We connected. He couldn’t shake the connection. I should have pushed him away more.”

“But you liked him from the start,” Yunjin points out, still defending you even from yourself. “And he knew. You two didn’t really stand a chance of this ending well.”

Seulgi looks between you and Yunjin with a heavy sigh before turning to Chaewon. “What do you think?”

“I think,” Chaewon says slowly, “in spite of my sapphic lifestyle and ways, I can tell why you like him. And I can see why he likes you. You two are cute together—Seulgi, don’t make that face, because you know it’s true. It’s sad it happened like this, but I think everything happens for a reason.” 

“So you think I should be with him or something?” you ask, surprised and confused and just a bit hopeful.

“I think this shouldn’t be the way to end it, if you do choose to end it. I think you should talk to him again.” she says wisely, and you nod thoughtfully.

“I guess I understand.” Seulgi finally chimes in, and you could practically faint with relief. “You’re basically, like, in love with him. And based on his behavior the other day—y’know, breaking up with Winter—he must love you, too.”

“Well, let’s not jump the gun.” you chuckle hollowly. “I already told him we couldn’t talk about it when he showed up at my place, and I think he thinks I was ending things.”

“Well, were you?” Chaewon asks, and you pause to think before shaking your head slowly.

“I don’t think I was.” you realize in surprise, and Yunjin lets out a low whistle.

“So, how are we going to get your little lover boy back?” she asks, and you shrug hopelessly.

“He probably doesn’t even want to see me,” you sigh.

“We’ll figure that out later,” Seulgi says comfortingly, sitting down on the carpet in front of your knees. “I’m sorry for coming at your throat like that earlier,” she says with a sad smile. “I thought I had an idea of what was going on, but I was wrong.”

“It’s okay,” you reply with a small smile. “You were just making sure I wasn’t, like, a terrible person and a homewrecker.”

“You know what I wonder?” Chaewon says out of the blue. “If the guys are comforting Haechan.”

“I hope they are,” you reply immediately. “I hope he’s not alone in this.”

“Well, why don’t you ask them?” she supplies helpfully, and you think about it before nodding in agreement.

“I can do that,” you say resolutely, and she squeezes your hand with an encouraging smile. 

“Good,” she hums, “now can we talk about something less dreadful? Like girls, perhaps?”

“I agree on the topic change,” Seulgi adds immediately, and you snort. 

“We could watch a movie?” Yunjin suggests, and you sit up slightly in your spot.

“We could watch a classic movie about girls,” you add on, and it’s almost like everyone’s mind syncs up at once. “Like—”

“But I’m A Cheerleader?” Seulgi finishes hopefully, and you laugh before nodding. “I’m in!”

As Yunjin and Seulgi start to bustle around the kitchen and living room to prepare for your movie viewing, Chaewon scoots closer to you and rests her head on your shoulder.

“We’ll make it through this, you know,” she comforts you gently. “This feeling definitely isn’t permanent.”

Her words linger in your mind the whole night as you hope and pray she’s right.

“So,” Chenle remarks loudly, folding his hands over his omelet and regarding you carefully. “Let’s recap, shall we?”

“Oh, God,” you groan, putting your face in your hands.

“You knew it was coming,” Mark says with a sympathetic smile.

“In the past week,” Chenle recounts to your table, “Winter has gone completely AWOL, Jeno’s sulking, and Haechan is in the middle of a depressive episode.” He sits forward and eyes you intently. “How do you feel about all of this? What are you gonna do about it all?”

“I already talked to Jeno,” you point out.

“Yes, and may have worsened his sulking.” Chenle counters, and you scowl.

“Who invited this guy?”

“I think what he’s trying to say is that, except Jeno, the ball’s kind of in your court in both situations.”

“I think Winter’s final message was perfectly clear and, frankly, she deserves to have the last word.” you raise your hands in surrender, and Chenle rolls his eyes.

“Don’t you think she deserves an apology?” he butts in, and you frown.

“Of course she does,” you say, “but I didn’t think she wanted to hear from me again, so I’m probably never going to speak to her again if I can help it.” Chenle shoots you a disapproving look, and you continue with, “I’m not going to ask her to unblock me because I deserve it. I did a bad thing to her! I betrayed her!”

“Okay,” Mark relents on that front, choosing a new angle. “How about Haechan?”

You pause, considering your words carefully. “I… I really like Haechan. Like, I really like him, but I’m scared, because I feel like if he cheated on Winter with me, who’s to say he won’t find another me in someone else later down the line? It’s just a very… high-risk situation.” you sigh, not yet noticing the look your friends share before sitting forward.

“Did you happen to say that during your talk with Haechan?” Mark asks, and you cock your head to the side in confusion.

“Say what?”

“High-risk,” Chenle presses, and you think back before nodding. “That explains that, then.”

“What are you talking about?” you ask, confused.

“He, um. He keeps saying that. That he’s too high-risk to be with and what’s the point of it all anyway, and—” Mark says, but you hold your hand up to silence him. 

“I’ll talk to him,” you promise quietly, trying to hide the way your heart is breaking. “I never meant to hurt him. I’ll talk to him soon.”

“And Winter? You never meant to hurt her either, I’m guessing.” Chenle asks.

“I’ll talk to Winter if she can manage to look at me without attacking me.” you sigh. “But we don’t live near each other, don’t work together, and it’s not like we’re gonna run into each other in the middle of the street or anything.”

“That’s fair,” Chenle shrugs. “But you might. It’s not exactly a small city, but it’s likely.”

“Pfft, okay.” you scoff. “Can I finish my waffles now?”

Chenle gestures at your plate with his fork invitingly. “Dig in.”

The universe has a funny way of making you eat your words sometimes.

You’re walking around at the farmer’s market in search of fresh produce for you and Yunjin, when a familiar head of strawberry blonde hair catches your eye and makes you freeze.

“Oh, no,” you whisper to yourself, ducking behind a cart of mangoes. The man running the cart peers down at you curiously but, at the sight of your pleading expression, doesn’t protest. “Please keep walking,” you say hopefully, peering over the counter of the cart.

To your complete and utter dismay, not only is Winter in perfect eyesight of you still, but now you’re in perfect eyesight of her.

You two lock eyes and, frankly, you don’t know what to do. Recognition, then pain, then a flash of anger passes over Winter’s face before she settles on indifference and turns, walking away.

You stand up slowly, embarrassed, and smooth out the invisible wrinkles on your sundress, nodding gratefully at the still confused older man who you’ve joined behind the counter. “Thank you.”

“Welcome,” he replies, voice kind of gruff. “Would you like some mangoes?”

You pause, thinking. “Actually, I would.”

The universe must be feeling silly again, you think as you contemplate your current predicament. 

You’ve been walking around the farmer’s market with a general sense of anxiety and wariness, flinching at every redhead you see, and you’ve just finished checking over your shoulder to make sure she’s not about to run up behind you with a spear when you run directly into the very person you’re avoiding, Winter stumbling to the side from the impact before you steady her.

“Thanks,” she says with an awkward smile, adjusting the strap of her bag on her shoulder.

“No problem,” you reply with a small smile, nodding uncomfortably. You two stare at each other and Winter opens her mouth as if to speak, but ultimately seems to decide against it and turns to leave. She gets about five feet away before you’re blurting out, “I’m sorry!”

She pauses mid-stride, and you take a deep breath. “I’m not asking for forgiveness because I don’t deserve it,” you say carefully, “but I want you to know that nothing about this was personal. It was selfish and horrible, but it was all about me and had nothing to do with hurting you. I can’t explain what happened because I don’t fully understand and I suspect you don’t want to hear it, but I really am sorry and it’s over now.”

She turns to face you finally, her brows raised in surprise. “It’s over?”

You nod resolutely.

“I mean—you’re right. I’m not gonna forgive you. I am gonna say, though, that from seeing you two together, like even when I had my suspicions, I… I get it.”

It’s your turn for your brows to shoot up in shock. “You get it?”

She nods with a small shrug. “Your connection is, like, electric. Like, it hurts for real, don’t get me wrong, and I definitely don’t forgive you, but I’d rather he break up with me to be with the love of his life than break up with me for no reason, y’know? Am I making sense? I guess what I’m saying is: you already did the bad thing… so you might as well reap the benefits of the bad thing and have a whirlwind of a relationship whether it ends well or not.”

You nod slowly, in a daze but still unwaveringly focused on one part of her response. “He said that?” you ask quietly, stunned.

Winter tilts her head to the side in confusion. “Said what?”

“That I’m the love of his life,” you repeat, awestruck. “He said that?”

Winter shifts her weight from one foot to the other, but nods. “Yeah.”

“Like those were his exact words?” you press as you move a bit closer.

Winter coughs uncomfortably into her fist, looking pained. “I’d rather not rehash every intimate detail of my boyfriend dumping me for my ex-friend… and I’d rather not do it to said ex-friend.” she explains, and you nod immediately, stepping back slightly in a silent apology for overstepping. 

“My bad,” you mumble, embarrassed.

“You’re fine,” she replies quietly, adjusting her bag strap again. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m saying it because, unfortunately for me, I still care about both of you. Give him another chance? I just… you two could be really good together and I don’t want to have suffered for nothing.”

Your nodding starts slow and builds until you feel more confident in your decision. “Thanks, Winter. I really am sorry.”

“Yeah,” she nods dismissively in response, and you purse your lips awkwardly. “Um, I’m gonna—” she gestures with her thumb over her shoulder.

“Sure! Yeah, me too. Take—um—take care, I guess.” you mumble, and she smiles slightly.

“You too.”

You think over Winter’s advice for about a week, really considering and weighing out your options. The whole time, though, your mind keeps wandering back to Haechan because, honestly, you miss him. You’re trying not to let that color your decisions, but at the same time, how could it not? 

You’re home with Yunjin, both of you sprawled out on the couch watching some mindless reality television show in an attempt to distract yourself from the internal debate you’re having, when the doorbell rings. You both turn and look at each other, confused.

“I’m not expecting anyone,” you say slowly. “Are you?”

“Nope,” she answers, brows furrowed curiously. “I’ll get it, though.”

“Thanks,” you sigh, trying once more to become one with the upholstery. She gets to her feet and walks to the front door, the sound of it opening catching your attention just in time for you to hear her call your name.

You stand and make your way over to the front door only to stop short at the sight of Haechan standing in your doorway.

The three of you stand there, seemingly frozen, before Yunjin breaks the silence.

“I’ll, um, be in my room if you need me.” she says, squeezing your arm gently before turning and heading to her bedroom.

You two just stand there, still frozen, taking in the sight of each other. Seeing Haechan makes all your feelings from the past week multiply tenfold, but one thought pushes to the forefront: you really did miss him.

“Hi,” he says with a small wave, and you offer the beginnings of a smile.

“Hi,” you reply, waving back awkwardly. 

“How are you?” he asks softly.

You shrug half-heartedly. “I’m okay, y’know—living, I guess.” you answer, and he nods slowly, drumming his fingers on the sides of his thighs.

“Well, that’s, um, good. I’m happy to hear that.” he says carefully, and it’s your turn to nod.

“How are you?” you ask, and he looks you directly in the eyes.

”Bad.” he answers simply, and your brows raise in surprise. 

“Oh—?”

“I feel like I’m not living when I’m not with you.” he admits plainly.

You’re not really sure what to say. “Oh… that’s not good?”

Despite his admission, Haechan still manages to chuckle at your flustered state, stepping forward and asking, “Are we gonna have this whole conversation with me standing outside of your apartment?”

You shake your head and move back to let him in before you even realize you’re doing it. “You can come in,” you offer, and he takes the invitation immediately, stepping closer and into your apartment. He walks straight to your living room with you following after him and stands in the middle of it, running his hand through his hair.

“I can’t stop thinking about you,” he whispers the confession, and your eyes widen slightly. “I like you so much. You make my day better when I know I get to see you.”

Your face softens. “Haechan—”

“I’m not intentionally being selfish, either!” he defends himself, and you stop speaking, waiting for him to finish. “It was just… eating me up inside not to be with you and show the world how much I like you. It just felt so wrong to me, like, what was I doing in that relationship?”

You wait for a minute. “Is that all you wanted to say?” you ask gently, and he shakes his head, taking a deep breath before continuing.

“I know I’m a cheater and I’m pretty dangerous in terms of being in a relationship with me because I literally just dumped my girlfriend quite abruptly after cheating on her with you, but—”

“Haechan, I wasn’t saying you’re a cheater. Like, yes, you did cheat, but that doesn’t define you, I don’t think.” you say slowly, not willing to hear him about to beat himself up, and he relaxes slightly, looking over at you hopefully. “I just… I know I have a hard time trusting people, and I’m having a hard time right now because you’re one of the first people I’d like to trust again, which is terrifying to me.” you say with a slight shake to your voice.

“I would never hurt you on purpose,” he assures you. “Like I would never do anything like this to you.”

You wrap your arms around yourself in a tight hug in an attempt to comfort yourself. “How do I know that’s true?” you whisper, and he gives you a small, sad smile.

“You’re just gonna have to trust me and find out. And I know that’s a big, high-risk situation, but—”

“It’s worth it, though,” you interject softly, and he stops short, looking at you with eyes swimming with hope. “Like, you’re worth it. I think.”

The beginnings of a smile tug at his lips. “Yeah?” If hope was a light, he’d be glowing from every orifice of his body as he tentatively steps closer to you, smiling wider when you don’t step back.

You nod with a smile curling your own lips. “Yeah, the risk is worth the reward this time, I think, because… I really like being with you.”

Haechan’s eyes hold a playful twinkle as he leans closer, a mischievous grin on his lips. “Yeah? You like being with me?”

“Yeah, I do. A lot. That’s why I was so upset,” you admit. “I wished… still kinda wish… that things were different. That it was me from the beginning.”

“It was you, baby,” he says with an incredulous laugh. “Winter and I were done for the second I laid eyes on you, truthfully.”

“I mean, I wish that we had met when you were single and we could have gotten together without compromising our morals.” you explain, and he nods in understanding before tentatively reaching a hand out to you. When you take it, he beams and pulls you closer to wrap his arm around the small of your back.

“Well… it can be you now.” he suggests, hope glowing from him once more. “You can trust me.”

“That’s a risk I’m gonna have to take, I guess.” you say with a growing smile, and he doesn’t waste another moment before wrapping you in a tight embrace that feels like coming home after a long day. “I missed you,” you confess, voice muffled by the hug, and he pulls back to regard you with shock all over his features.

“You missed me? I was about two days away from doing some grand gesture to get you back or crashing out horrendously if you said no.” he laughs, and you giggle, looking up at him with bright, happy eyes.

“Oh, really? Actually, that does sound about right.” you tease, and he narrows his eyes at you playfully before leaning in closer.

“Shut up,” he chuckles before bringing his lips to yours in a sweet kiss. It feels like warmth floods your whole system, not a warmth akin to desire, but a warmth unlike one you’ve experienced or find yourself able to identify, and you wonder, for a moment, if this is what it feels like to be in love. “Missed you so much,” he groans against your lips, and you pull back slightly to give him small, soft pecks that leave him chasing after your lips for more. “You know what?”

“What is it?”

“I wanna say something.” he decides, and you regard him curiously.

“What’s up?”

“I would really, truly, never ever cheat on you or do anything to break your heart.” he promises you, and you nod with a warm smile.

“I think I believe you,” you say slowly, almost surprised at yourself, and his eyes light up.

“Really?” he asks excitedly, and you nod, draping your arms around his neck.

“I guess I just figured that you wouldn’t do that to the… love of your life.” you say with a teasing smile towards the end, and Haechan stiffens.

“Who told you that?”

“Winter.” you answer simply, and he gapes at you.

“She told you I said that?” he says hoarsely, and you nod, your eyes twinkling with delight. “Why would she do that to me?”

“Possibly her final act of revenge.” you suggest, and his mouth twists awkwardly as he looks away from you with his face reddening. “Hold on a minute. Are you—” 

“Don’t,” he groans, but you ignore him.

“Are you shy right now?” you giggle, and he lets out a small, adorably pathetic wail before burying his face in your neck, the force of his actions knocking you off your feet and sending you both falling onto the couch with a shriek slipping from your lips. “Aw, poor baby,” you coo patronizingly, running your fingers through his hair as he wraps both arms around your waist tighter and nuzzles into the space between your chin and shoulder.

“Don’t be mean,” he whines, and you can’t even stop laughing even if you tried, truly delighted at this new side of Haechan.

“I think you kind of like it when I’m mean,” you remind him through your giggles, and he nods vehemently against your skin, only making your laughter grow.

“Yeah, so quit it before I get hard and make it your problem.” he grumbles, and you scoff.

“I’m not scared of your little friend, Haechan.” you say, and he pulls back to look at you incredulously.

“Little?!” he practically squawks before his fingers are dancing up and down your sides to tickle you mercilessly. 

“I’m sorry!” you shriek through your uncontrollable laughing, and he stops abruptly, bringing his face to yours and studying your expression carefully.

“That’s what I thought. I mean, little? Really? Did you actually forget so soon, baby?” he says with a mocking pout, and you swallow thickly as you gaze up at him. He leans closer so your noses are touching before he says, “I think you might need a reminder.”

“Can you remind her in her bedroom and not defile our lovely couch?” Yunjin’s voice appears out of nowhere, and you jolt in surprise, trying to sit up (in vain, as Haechan has you pinned down). “Love is a beautiful thing, but cum stains aren’t.”

“Amen, girl.” you agree, patting Haechan’s chest to let you up, which he does. “Come on.” you stand and offer him your hand, which he takes readily, and lead him to your room. It’s not until you two are safely in your room with your door shut that you say, “I do too, by the way.”

“You do… what… too?” Haechan asks, puzzled, and you smile secretively, collapsing onto your bed.

“Love you.” you answer simply, and his eyes look like they could pop out of his head at any moment. “Don’t freak out.” you warn him, and he jumps onto your bed, climbing on top of you with a wild, exhilarated look in his eyes.

“The love of my life just told me she loves me back and you expect me to stay calm?” he says incredulously, and you nod. 

“Precisely.”

He dips his head down swiftly to kiss you before sitting up and pulling his phone out of his back pocket. “No can do. Gonna text all my friends the news right now and tell my boss I’m not coming to work later.”

“Now why would that warrant calling out of work?” you say with a snort.

“Hush, lady, I’m posting on my Instagram story.” he silences you with a focused look on his face.

“Can I see when you’re done?” you ask, and he nods, turning his phone to face you. “…Haechan.”

“Yes?”

“‘My girl said she loves me, crash out postponed’ is a crazy thing to post.” you snicker.

“It’s true!”

“Your crash out should be canceled!” you exclaim incredulously.

“I’m never truly not at risk of crashing out.” he confesses, and you make a worried face and start sitting up, pretending to get ready to leave. “Oh, no, you don’t.” he mumbles, wrapping his arms around your middle and pulling you back down to him. “You’re stuck with me, I fear.”

“Mm, I guess that’s okay.” you say with a grin.

Truthfully, you don’t think you could be happier.

“What are we watching tonight?” Chenle asks as he plops down on the other end of the couch you’re sitting on.

“I vote Aquaman,” you pipe up, reaching out to Haechan as he approaches with a plate of pizza rolls for you two. When he offers the plate to your outstretched hands, you shake your head and wave the plate away, reaching out again to make it abundantly clear what you’re reaching for. He grins, setting the plate down on the coffee table in front of you before collapsing into your waiting embrace with a pleased sigh.

“You just wanna drool over Jason Momoa,” Chaewon jeers, and you shrug.

“That’s my God-given right.” you defend yourself casually, and Haechan nods in agreement.

“You do know she’s gonna lust after him the whole movie, right?” Chenle points out to Haechan, who just shrugs dismissively.

“Then when she’s all pent-up and frisky, who’s she gonna come to?” he answers smugly, and you beam, leaning over to kiss his cheek.

“He’s playing chess, y’all, not checkers.” you remark.

Haechan snorts in amusement and grins proudly before jerking his chin towards the television. “Exactly. Now someone put it on.”

“Bossy ass,” Yunjin mutters jokingly under her breath. 

“What was that?” Haechan puts a hand behind his ear. “Couldn’t hear you over there.”

“No, you can’t fight Yunjin.” you whisper to him, putting his hand down. He looks over at you confused and you continue, “I can’t pick a side.”

“Pick my side?” he replies slowly as if the answer was obvious. “I’m your boyfriend.”

“She’s my best friend, though.” you reply with a wince, and Yunjin nods from the armchair she’s curled up in. “And she knows where I sleep at night.”

“Both are true,” she confirms proudly, and Haechan sucks his teeth but backs down with a roll of his eyes. 

“Fine. For now,” he relents with a brief glare shot in Yunjin’s direction. “Can we put the movie on now?” he complains, and she rolls her eyes exaggeratedly before starting to navigate to the movie on the television screen.

Haechan laces his fingers with yours, curling them into his palm as he brings your linked hands to his mouth. You watch with rapt attention as he kisses the back of your hand, then each knuckle, all the while maintaining heavy eye contact.

Your cheeks blaze something fierce and you look away with a nervous, shy giggle that makes Haechan chuckle.

“Look at me,” he murmurs insistently, moving his head so it’s more in your line of sight. When you swallow and look away again, he coos fondly, pulling your chin so your face is angled towards his once more. “There’s my pretty girl.”

“Haechan,” you whine quietly, and his gaze darkens.

“What is it, baby?” he murmurs with a sympathetic lilt. “What’s wrong?”

“Stop looking at me like that,” you mumble, placing your hand up between your faces so he can’t look directly at you. “It’s making me nervous.”

He snickers, moving your hand to your lap and regarding you carefully.

“How am I looking at you?” he asks with a raised brow and a devious little grin. 

“You know how you’re looking at me.” you gripe, pushing his shoulder slightly, and his eyes flash with mischief.

“Well, it’s not that I’m looking at you like you’re the only thing on my menu for tonight, is it? Because I look at you like that all the time.” he thinks aloud, slowly pulling you onto his lap and winding his arms around your waist. 

“God, Haechan,” you half-laugh, half-gasp, and he grins. 

“No, it can’t be that. Is it because I’m looking at you like I love you?” he asks plainly, and your throat closes up slightly in shock from his bluntness. 

“Well—yes, a bit.” you mumble, shifting in your spot slightly. 

“I don’t know if you realize this,” he murmurs by your ear, “but I’ve been looking at you like that from day one.”

“It’s way different now,” you counter, frowning as you explain yourself. “Before it was like… fascination more than—”

“Understanding?” he finishes for you, and you blink in surprise before nodding. “So I could look at you like I love you when I didn’t know you, but now that I know you, I can’t look at you like I love you? Even though now I have more reasons to love you?” he says slowly, looking at you with his brows raised. “Do you see how silly you sound, baby?”

You can’t help but laugh fondly, reaching up to run your fingers through his hair. “I kinda do, yeah.”

“Good. Now gimme a kiss before you let me look at you any way I want.” he huffs playfully, pressing his lips to yours with a pleased hum.

“Can you two get a room?” Chenle gags, and you break apart, a sheepish smile on your face while Haechan rolls his eyes. “Man, what’s Jeno gonna do when he comes back to hanging out with us and has to watch you two practically going at it all the time?”

“He’s a big boy, he’ll manage.” Haechan grumbles before pecking you on the lips again.

“Speaking of Jeno,” you ask, shifting to sit up slightly. “Do we really think he’s gonna feel comfortable being friends with us again?”

“He’d be silly not to,” Chaewon answers in confusion. “It’s not like you two were a thing for real.” 

“Speaking of people and forgiveness and that kind of stuff…” Haechan trails off, his voice softer as he shifts his target audience to you alone, and you turn your head slightly to regard him suspiciously. 

“You’d better not ask what I think you’re about to ask.” you warn him, and he frowns.

“I was just wondering if you think Winter would ever forgive us?” he asks hopefully, and you shake your head resolutely.

“No. And she shouldn’t, frankly. We did a bad thing.” you explain, and he nods slowly.

“I just feel a little guilty.” he muses quietly, and you can’t hide your small snicker of amusement.

“You should, actually. But it’ll pass with time hopefully.” you assure him.

“What are you two lovebirds chatting about?” Seulgi calls out from across the room.

“Wondering if Winter would ever forgive any of us.” you answer for Haechan, and Seulgi, Yunjin, and Mark shake their heads immediately, Chenle straight up laughs, and Yunjin shoots you both a sympathetic frown.

“I doubt it. She blocked all of us when she found out we knew.” Mark points out, and you nod slowly in understanding.

“Actually, she didn’t block me,” Yunjin corrects, “but I think that has more to do with the fact that we’re kind of coworkers.”

“Have you seen her since everything?” Chaewon asks curiously, and Yunjin thinks back for a moment.

“I saw her the other day because she was working with a client that stays on the same floor as Mrs. Rothschild. She gave me, like, that reflex half-smile that you give people when you don’t wanna seem rude, y’know?” 

“Oh, I know that one.” you reply with a solemn nod. “We’re doomed.”

“Can we stop moping around and watch this movie, please? Also, can we order pizza or something, because I’m starving.” Mark complains, clutching his stomach, and you snort loudly in amusement.

“Yeah, moping session over. Let’s press play and figure out the food situation.” you announce, and Yunjin nods once before starting the movie. As the starting credits roll, you all decide on the pizza order (three medium pizzas, one with extra cheese, one with pepperoni, and one with half pineapple, half chicken and tomato) and place it for delivery before you settle further into the couch on Haechan’s lap in an attempt to get comfortable.

When the doorbell rings, you all look at each other in a silent standoff before Haechan sighs loudly and clambers off of the couch to get the door. You all wait with bated breath until he returns with three boxes of pizza stacked on top of each other before you start cheering.

As you all scramble to get your slices of choice, Haechan pushes Chenle out of the way none too gently, the male squawking indignantly before muttering something about favoritism and revenge and Haechan’s toothbrush, and tugs you closer to the boxes. “Take your pick, baby.”

“Aren’t you a gentleman?” you coo fondly as you take your desired slices.

After he takes his, the two of you make your way back to the couch and settle down in your spots from before. 

“Y’know, I’ve been trying to convince you I’m a gentleman since, like, the first day I met you,” he chuckles. 

“It was a lot harder to believe when you were literally dating You-Know-Who.” you reply in defense, and he rolls his eyes.

“I’ve been yours from the beginning, though. I told you that.” he reminds you, and you gaze into his eyes for a moment before reaching up and gently cupping his cheek.

“Yeah, but now I actually believe you.” you say softly, almost surprised by your own revelation, and his eyes widen slightly before a smile starts tugging at his lips.

“Oh, yeah? How’s it feel, then?” he asks in a murmur, and you tilt your head to the side in confusion.

“How does what feel?”

“Knowing I love you,” he answers, and there goes that arrhythmic thud of your heartbeat starting up again. “That I’m yours.”

the boy is mine. watch me take my time. i can’t believe my mind. the boy is divine—

In lieu of a verbal response, you cup his chin and pull him in for a slow, deep kiss that you hope conveys all the feelings you can’t put into words. When you pull back, his eyes are heavy-lidded and he’s gazing at you with blatant adoration in his gaze.

“Like that,” you whisper back with a smile, and by the sheer radiance of his responding beam, you know he understands. 

—the boy is mine.

TA DA!!!!! i hope you enjoyed your read! this is the final installment, so thank you so so much for your support with this fic! it was a Lot to write but i’m proud of it! i really love positive feedback and also, if you’re able, i very much appreciate tips!! 

if you’d like to read the bonus scene, it’s available on my patreon here :) it answers a couple of questions you might have had, and down the line there will probably be more bonus scenes to come, exclusive to patreon members!!

LINKS: KO-FI // VENMO // CASHAPP // AMAZON WISHLIST // (if you’d like to support via paypal, let me know off anon!!)

[rottenpumpkin13]

Wait! Have you done a Road-trip shenanigans bit with the Firsts + Zack and Cloud yet?? If not, please I gotta know the crazy details.

How do they fair with everyone taking turns driving? Who nearly kills them all? Who is bringing what snacks? Do they get lost? Who goes insane first? Boredom songs? Fights in the backseat? Please I need this 💀

The Road Trip From Hell

• Genesis made the dumbass decision to buy a car—a vehicle he will never in his life use because the traffic in Midgar is ASS. It's this nice, red convertible that he now has to drive from Banora all the way back to the city.

• He convinces Sephiroth, Angeal, Zack and Cloud to come along with him on a road trip (they were all nearby on a mission). Angeal doesn't trust Genesis' ability to drive, Sephiroth does NOT see the appeal of spending 14 hours in a car with Genesis, Cloud has raging motion sickness, and Zack saw someone flip Genesis off on the road once and Genesis immediately retaliated with a fire ball, so he's scared.

Genesis: Fine. But if I crash the car and perish you will ALL be unable to live with yourselves.

*Sephiroth silently crosses his fingers*

• After much back to back and and a lot of dramatics from Genesis' end, the boys agree.

• They start off pretty good!! They're having sing-alongs, stopping at the side of the road to take fun pictures, eating unhealthy food at those road-stop diners, and generally having a good time.

• And then hour 3/14 rolls by and they are sick of each other.

Zack: Are we there yet?

*Angeal whips around immediately*

Angeal: Look at me, Fair, LOOK AT ME. This is the first and last time you ask this, got that? If you ask one more time, I'm going to shave your head and make you eat your own hair. Understood?

Zack: 0_0

• Genesis can't drive anymore and asks Angeal to take over. He switches over the the passenger seat and mans the playlist, forcing the entire car to listen to his cringey pop music.

Cloud: Can you change the song? This music sucks.

Sephiroth: I second that.

Genesis: Oh, does this bother you? *cranks the music up louder*

Cloud: On three.

Sephiroth: Got that.

Cloud: One, two—

• Sephiroth and Cloud lunge forward at the same time, using four hands to pin Genesis in place and strangle him. Zack is screaming and trying to pull them back, Genesis is choking and Angeal is dangerously close to driving the car off road—intentionally.

• By hour 5, everyone has fallen asleep except for Zack. Angeal made Genesis sit in the back with Sephiroth and Cloud while Zack sits up front.

Zack: I'm having fun!

Angeal: That's great.

Zack: When are we going to start the trip though?

Angeal: What do you mean?

*Zack pulls out a map on his tablet*

Zack: Well, according to this map, we've just been going in circles for 5 hours.

• Angeal wakes up Genesis to punch him in the face.

• Zack takes over the wheel now and has Cloud sit up front while they play I-Spy.

Zack: I spy something prickly and green.

Cloud: A tree?

Zack: Nice!

Cloud: Okay, uhhh...I spy something tall and silver.

Zack: Sephiroth!

Cloud: No. Sephiroth's not here.

Zack: Oh.

Zack:

Zack: WHAT!?

• Zack stops the car because Sephiroth is indeed missing. It turns out they left him back at their last stop, so they have to turn back around again to go pick him up.

• Sephiroth is indeed back at the restaurant, and he's PISSED. He makes Zack get out of the driver seat and insists they do this the "hard way"

• Sephiroth is driving now and makes everyone sit in complete silence while he finally gets them on the right track. Several hours later, Cloud shyly raises his hand.

Sephiroth: Speak.

Cloud: I have to go to the bathroom.

Sephiroth: Hold it.

Cloud: But what if—

Sephiroth: Hold it.

Cloud: But—

Sephiroth: HOLD IT STRIFE.

• Cloud holds it.

Genesis: This is ridiculous. It's my car. Get out, I'm driving again!

• Sephiroth gives up the wheel without much of a fight, but now Genesis is back in the driver's seat and Zack is antsy again. He sits in the passengers seat and decides to be a backseat driver.

Zack: You're going too fast!

Genesis: Oh, please, I'm going slow. You should see what this car can really do—HEY! THAT GUY JUST CUT ME OFF!

• Zack starts praying (loudly). Genesis is pissed beyond calming down, and decides to floor it and chase after the guy.

• Everyone is screaming, Zack is praying and crying, Angeal is trying to reason with Genesis, Cloud is swearing every curse word in the dictionary, Sephiroth...is asleep.

• When Genesis finally does stop, Angeal makes Genesis pull over. Him, Cloud and Zack get out of the car. Genesis makes a run for it, screaming down the road.

• Sephiroth awakes a few moments later, looks out the window, and sees everyone jumping Genesis. He looks around, then picks up the tablet with the map.

Sephiroth: Wow. I wonder how long it'll take them to realize that we went 120 miles in the wrong direction.

-

@salternateunreality has a ASGZC road trip shenanigans series on her blog if you want more of this :)

[arazialotis]

Get Him to the Con - Part 4

Pairing: Jensen × Reader

Word Count: About 7000

Summary: The reader stumbles into Jensen at her favorite bar, a very drunk Jensen. She soon realizes Jensen was booked for a con this weekend and has to be eight hours from town in only two.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Warnings: Language

I intend no hate or ill wishes to him or his family. This is purely just for writing and wasting my time as hobby. Maybe some of you will enjoy it too. I apologize in advance for any mistakes or grammatical/spelling errors. I appreciate any feedback or suggestions!

-----

“Ramble on. And now’s the time, the time is now to sing my song!” Jensen belted out from the passenger seat.

You hummed along, not as confident to share your untrained voice or speculative lyrical knowledge. However, you had no problem fabricating your own rhythms to fit Zeppelin’s complexity as you tapped along on the steering wheel. You had since stopped for a quick lunch, refueled, and switched seats as I-80 started to stretch into a straight line bordered by cornfields. Since then, you had made it through the first, and now we're nearing the end of Zeppelin's second album. Though you had a short attention span, and generally, the random shuffle on your playlists jumped from Broadway hits to Witch House, you were determined to make it to the end of album four. Haters would say it was the obvious choice and overrated, but screw them and their elitist attitude; it was still your favorite.

The car was beginning to lose that new car scent. Of course, it wasn't a new car, and the rental company used some variant of Febreze to cover up previous use. The pine tree air freshener didn't last long, either. Jensen prevented you from a littering offense just before you were about to throw it out the window by stuffing it in the glove compartment and tossing it at your first stop. With the sun beating down, opened snacks, and drinks in the console, it was beginning to feel like a well-loved family car.

After a few hours had gone by, this fantastical adventure was settling into reality. However, you were still unsure what prompted such an idea from Jensen. It had only been three months since Tennessee, and though he assured you that he was in a much better place now, you suspected the loneliness he talked of still haunted him. Part of you had hoped there might be something more than him wanting to cement the friendship you had built over the past few months. There was obvious and natural chemistry, yet you doubted its existence or that the feeling was reciprocated, thinking perhaps your previous admiration of him falsely conjured it. Jensen’s voice broke the spell of your spiraling thoughts.

"Two Girls and a Cupcake.” He chuckled as he read a billboard.

You couldn’t help but snort. “You're making that up. There's no way that's real."

"Dude, I just saw the sign." He pointed back. "I'm not sharp enough to make up a pun that good."

"What exit?" You challenged, barely believing him.

"A left at this one." He recited confidently.

You pinched your lips together in a smile and pressed down on the gas, hoping to pass a string of cars before the exit, to call his bluff, or end up with a cupcake. A win-win either way. Jensen grabbed the "oh shit" handle from the unexpected burst of speed.

Four miles down the road, surrounded by nothing but fields and an occasional decrepit barn, there were certainly no cupcakes to be seen.

"Just admit it," you said. "You were thinking about porn."

"How many times do I gotta swear it was real?" He defended. "Maybe I read the exit wrong. Wait, what is that?"

A little one-horse town seemingly popped out of the middle of nowhere solely for his benefit. He pointed ahead to a pink abomination growing ever closer.

"Ha! Told ya!" He gloated as you pulled in.

"Oh, we have to get a picture with that guy." You grinned at the overly tacky pink sasquatch.

"After cupcakes," Jensen demanded, already halfway out the door.

You chuckled and got out as well, taking your time stretching. Jensen showed no chivalry in waiting for you and was already in the shop receiving the rundown on best sellers and personal favorites by the time you joined him. He was leaned over, peering into the display, closely analyzing each flavor and acknowledging the shopkeeper now and then with an uh-huh.

"Okay, okay." He straightened and finally decided. "They all sound amazing, but I think I'm sold on the chocolate creme pie."

He glanced at you for your reaction, and you had to look away to keep from bursting out with laughter from the horrible innuendo.

"And for you, sweetheart?" The shopkeeper asked as they packaged up Jensen's.

"Oh, um. Surprise me, dealer's choice." You couldn't possibly settle on one with such fun and unique flavors.

"How spontaneous of you." Jensen teased, and you responded in kind by sticking out your tongue.

The shopkeeper thanked you on your way out. In a single bite, Jensen devoured half the cupcake. He rolled his eyes and leaned back.

You chuckled. "That bad, eh?"

“Yes, so bad that I better take yours off your hands.” He said and lunged for you.

You squealed and shielded your cupcake. “I will be the judge, thank you very much.”

He chuckled and let you be in peace as you dug in.

“Oh, yeah.” You concluded. “I’m stopping here on the way back. Hey! Where are you going?” You chastised him as he opened the car door.

“Denver?” He questioned, but it came together once you pointed back to the sasquatch. “Oh, you were serious? I will, but only for a bite.” His tongue peeked out between his teeth in a grin.

You contemplated. “How big a bite are we talking?” This was a very debatable matter as he had finished his in three bites only.

He pinched his fingers together, indicating the tiniest amount.

“Picture first.” You demanded.

“Alright. Alright.” He gave in and got his phone out. “Bring it in.”

You embraced the pink behemoth on each side, smiling at the camera. He took a couple, and on the third, you simultaneously kissed the creature on the cheek. Jensen looked through the photos.

“Oh, that's a keeper.” He remarked and forwarded them to you.

You laughed as you viewed them. “Adorable.”

“Aren’t I?” He teased.

You playfully slapped his shoulder. “Bigfoot, not you.”

He rubbed his shoulder in jest. “Shoot. If I had known Jared was your type, I would have invited him along.”

“Jared is not my type.” It slipped out before your brain caught up with your mouth.

You blushed, wondering if it came out harsher than intended or, even more so, if it implied something else to Jensen. There had always been teasing and banter that bordered on the edge of flirting. And the first road trip didn’t count in which Jensen had his drunk goggles on and lower standards as he shamelessly tried to pick you up, but since then, it had just been a friendship. The same mental dialogue from earlier repeated, ending with a spiraling mantra to not get your hopes up.

Jensen swallowed a lump in his throat. “He’ll be devastated knowing he’s been passed up. Out of curiosity, what is your type?”

Your heart thudded in your chest. What did that mean? Was he fishing for something in particular, or did he generally want to know? You. You’re my type. Your mind shouted at him as if it could reach him telepathically. Someone who is kind, and smart, and funny, and thoughtful, and passionate… the list went on. It wasn't that Jared wasn't any of those things, but there was something different about Jensen that had always spoken to you. Thankfully, a filter had reappeared since your last slip.

You cleared your throat, realizing too much time had passed without an answer, and you held out your cupcake. “As promised.”

He took it, his eyes never leaving yours, as if he was deeply contemplating your lack of response. That was until he took a bite and broke the concentration. He leaned his head back.

“God, how is that even better than the first one?” He shook his head in disbelief and went in for another bite.

“Hey! We said one!” You took it back from him after a brief playful struggle. “Now, let’s get this show on the road before your personal trainer puts a bounty on my head.”

“To hell with them, and self-control, and balance,” Jensen stated before heading back in and ordering a half dozen more for the road.

****

"I spy," Jensen drew out the words. "Something yellow."

"I swear to God, if it's corn again, I will turn this car around." You threatened.

Had one not been privy to the playful banter all day, they may have mistaken your threat as serious. Only three cupcakes remained in the backseat and were in danger of not surviving until night. Just as the trip started to drag, thus prompting the license plate game (in which you had fifteen states down already) and I Spy to emerge, the fourth album came on, bringing a rejuvenating spirit. Your levees broke, as they say, and any embarrassment from singing in front of Jensen vanished as you both sang out the opener Black Dog. Though the inhibitions only lasted so long. As Robert Plant’s voice made love to the microphone and John Paul Jone's fingers sweetly strummed the riff, your mind was transported to a seedy, sweaty motel room where you worked the man seated next to you with as much rhythm and passion. Jensen pulled you out as he grabbed your hand in tune with the lyrics. He let go, continuing to jam, unaware you had turned three shades darker as if through the touch, your thoughts could transfer to him. You wrung the steering wheel in a tight grip trying to think of anything but your body against his.

Despite the music, Jensen seemed determined to hold onto and win this game of I Spy. The problem was the options were limited to gray pavement, green grass, blue sky, or yellow corn. Granted, you could have both been more creative, but other things were taking precedence in your minds.

Jensen chuckled. “It’s not corn.”

“Is it the sun?” You bemoaned.

“Nope.”

“The lines on the road.” It was the only other thing it could possibly be. You hadn’t passed any signs recently, there was one other car on the road, but that was blue, and nothing inside the car looked yellow from your vantage point.

“Wrong again.” He said smugly.

“I give up. You win.” You easily gave up knowing Stairway to Heaven was playing next.

“It’s the corn’s husks.” He divulged.

“That is cheating.” Had you not been driving, you would have shoved him.

“Might I remind you,” He said, marking a tally. You bit back a smile and shook your head, knowing he was keeping score only to provoke you further. “When you said white, it wasn’t the clouds, it was specifically a jet trail, and I let it slide.”

“It’s completely a separate thing!” You argued. “Created by completely different methods and substances. Corn and corn husks are the same entity.”

“Okay, well, next time you have something with corn, I will make sure to replace it with husks, and then we will see how you feel.” He threatened.

You had lost, and you knew it.

“Shut up.” That was all you had to say, and in ending the conversation, you turned up the stereo for one of the most legendary songs in all of rock n’ roll.

“Despite the epicness of all that has come before,” Jensen stated as a few more songs passed to the slower acoustic melody of Going to California. “This is one of my favorites. Definitely in the top five.”

Lost in thought, he placed his hand on yours atop the gear stick, his thumb lazily stroking over your knuckles. Your heart stopped, toes curled, as you contained a scream internally. This wasn’t happening.

“You know, we should just skip over Denver and keep heading to Cali.” He thought aloud.

You gripped the steering wheel with your free hand, attempting to string together any semblance of comprehendible words. “Is that what you want?”

He sighed. “Of course, it’s what I want. What I should do is something entirely different.”

His hand left yours, and you couldn’t help but wonder if he meant something more than simply bailing on the convention.

“Like corn and corn husks.” You couldn’t help yourself.

He rolled his eyes in your direction, delightfully unamused, as if he wanted to give you something to really smirk about.

“I mean, if you need me to stage a kidnapping,” You proposed with false sincerity. “Out of the goodness of my heart, I would do that for you.”

He softly chuckled. “How kind of you.”

“So long as you promise not to press any charges.” You added.

“And miss the opportunity to see you in handcuffs,” Holy shit. He said it out loud. It just poured out like he was as inebriated as the night you first met. He desperately stumbled to fix it. “It would be hilarious. Just truly, the peak of comedy. And the mug shot after a week in a car and shitty motels. Oh, man.” He turned to look out the window and hide the blush that had crept into his cheeks, praying you didn’t catch on to where his mind initially went.

It worked. Yes, your thoughts went there briefly, but to you, it was obviously not what he intended. “It is on my bucket list to spend at least one night in jail.”

That shocked him out of his embarrassment. “Should I be concerned?”

You licked your lips, pondering. “Like, not for something nefarious. Maybe for protesting, embodying the Robin Hood persona, overdue library books, all those Limewire downloads coming back to haunt me, something like that.”

“Limewire? How dare you.” He teased. “Priacy is the biggest threat to my industry.” He pulled up his phone. “I’m calling the feds right now. Had I known…”

“Oh, no need; they already know. They deemed the six months I was grounded for destroying two family computers as time served.” Though the feds had not been involved, and other aspects exaggerated, you recalled how infuriated your parents had been. “And here I thought you would have run a background check.”

“Hey Siri,” He talked into his phone. “Remind me next time I decide to go ‘cross country with the nice girl I met at a bar three months ago to run a background check.”

“Alright.” The automated voice replied. “When do you want to be reminded?”

“Ah…. well, driving route 66 to the Vegas convention might be fun, so give or take five months.” He responded.

“Okay. In five months, you will be reminded the next time you decide to go ‘cross country with the nice girl you met at a bar three months ago to run a background check.” The monotone voice concluded.

Perhaps out of the stir-craziness of being stuck in a car and on the road for so many hours, you both erupted with laughter.

A while longer, and you were close to reaching your limit. The car was close to needing gas again, the thought of dinner was haunting your stomach, and your legs were pleading to be stretched. The problem was, there was nothing out here. You were somewhere between Des Moines and Omaha. Siri had outlived her usefulness as cell service was shotty at best. Even if there was food or shelter nearby, she wouldn’t be able to tell you. Zeppelin had fulfilled their purpose, and you had rescinded the music rule, letting Jensen shuffle through radio channels, as streaming was no longer available anyways.

Finally, a billboard popped up in the distance, signifying a spot of life. As Jensen changed the station, the words came into view just as a guitar strummed the opening of an unmistakable song. The universe could not have manifested a more perfect unison. Asia’s Heat of the Moment and an advertisement for Iowa’s most mysterious spot collided. Both of you were dumbfounded.

“It’s fucking fate.” You finally managed a whisper.

“No. Nope. Absolutely not.” Jensen was not having it. “That is how people get murdered.”

“It’s not even Tuesday.” You snapped. “And I need to get out of this goddamn car.”

“Do you want to end up a cold open for Supernatural? Cause this is how you do it.” He argued back.

You weren’t having it. You needed the break and fresh air. Ignoring his protests, you made your way for the exit.

“Look.” You pointed to the sign listing things nearby. “There’s a restaurant and motel nearby as well.”

“If we switched and got back on the highway, I could get us Omaha tonight. We’re not that far.” He reasoned.

“And we could drive straight through to Denver.” You argued back, turning down the country road, fields of corn still surrounding you. “And here I thought you were supposed to be the spontaneous one.”

“I know what you’re trying to do.” He deduced. “It’s not going to work.”

“You are welcome to stay in the car and scout out the town.” You offered. “But don’t think for a second I will tell you what the mystery is. That’s for paying customers only.”

“Do you recall the classic cinematic plot line where cannibals lure unsuspecting tourists to their town with, I don’t know, world-famous apple pie or a mystery spot where physics are defied? And just as the couple has a great time and is leaving the town, one of the locals strings out spikes on the road that pops all the tires; thus, an ensuing bloodsoaked gorefest follows.” He rambled.

“I can’t say I do.” You feigned. “Aside from a few one-offs, Psycho, The Shining, Silence of the Lambs (speaking of cannibals), horror isn’t my thing. So this should be an enlightening experience.” You looked over at him. “Don’t worry, Jensen, I’ll protect you.” The reassuring pat on his thigh sold it.

Now as you pulled up to the lot, it was you who was having second guesses. Whatever this place was now, it was undoubtedly a repurposed carnival funhouse. From the purple paint, the neon trim, and the huge sadistic alien head that loomed over the entrance. Signs were scattered everywhere, bright yellow advertising the astonishments that waited inside. Aside from your car, a rusted-out maroon Corsica was for sale that probably hadn’t been moved since the early 90s.

Though the car was at a stop, the engine still ran as you analyzed the site before you. Jensen’s smugness grew the more he sensed your hesitation.

“No one’s going to call you a coward if you turn around.” He goaded.

You glared at him, biting the inside of your cheek, and switched the engine off.

“I’m not scared.” You assured him. “It’s probably just a mirror maze that leads to pieces of a broken weather balloon they are pawning off as a spaceship.”

By all means, he seemed to convey with the wave of his hand, be my guest. Flustered, you got out of the car but immediately relished your choice. You stretched and breathed in the fresh air, delighted to no longer be in motion. With a rejuvenated determination that this mystery would be life-altering and reveal the darkest kept secrets in all of Iowa, you made your way up the rickety metal stairs and through the doors.

Jensen audibly sighed while running his hands through his hair, giving it a few minutes for you to turn back around. When you didn’t, he finally gave in.

“Fine.” He conceded to no one other than himself. “Let’s get this over with.”

The doors chimed above him as he entered the stale lobby, whose furnishings and carpet were clearly taken from a closing Blockbuster. The decor was in complete shambles, from botched taxidermy to cheap plasma ball lamps. Of course, it wouldn’t be complete without the t-shirts and shot glasses proclaiming the survival of the mystery spot. A black curtain separated the lobby or ‘free museum’ from the rest of the attraction.

You beamed as Jensen found his way in. “Make that two tickets.” You clarified with reversed peace sign and handed payment to the cashier, a teenager so young it was questionable if they were even legally allowed to work or if this was a family affair they were forcibly roped into after school.

With not a shred of enthusiasm, the teen mumbled their way through a scripted spiel. “What you are about to experience has baffled scientists, confused archaeologists, and astonished physicists. Your purchase today has granted you access to a select group of individuals who hold the key to enlightenment. Prepare to be amazed and….”

Jensen caught off the monotone dialogue with the wave of his hand. “We get it, kid, thanks.”

They looked relieved to have been granted permission to stop. “It’s behind the curtain. Follow the arrows.”

They popped a plexiglass case open and flipped a large breaker, causing a loud pop as the building came to life. The sound of motors whirring spun in the distance, and the foundations seemed to rock from the sudden change. Dust scattered through the air from high-up shelves and door frames.

Once you caught your balance, Jensen mumbled, “The only mystery to be solved is how this building is still in one piece.”

You laughed and stepped from the light of the lobby into darkness. The black lights above illuminated the neon carpet pieces and painted edgings of the walls. Sure enough, a bright green arrow made from duck tape pointed you forward. Like children discovering laser tag for the first time, you looked at each other's outfits to see what pieces of clothing were affected by the black lights. You jolted as Taylor Swift blasted over the speakers, then abruptly stopped. Clearly, the teen had the wrong playlist up and running. After a moment, Taylor had been replaced with sounds, cycling through blowing wind, rain, and thunder. A crow cawed, and a voice cackled. A violin softly cried out notes barely audible with the competing ambiance. A fear crept in that you had accidentally signed up for a haunted house and not a mystery spot. You took a step back and bumped into Jensen’s solid frame.

He chuckled slightly and grabbed your shoulders, pushing you forward, one hesitant step at a time. “Oh, there is no turning back now. You’ve just crossed over into the twilight zone.” He said before humming out the theme song’s notes.

“You didn’t even want to do this.” You hissed back at him, still resisting him, as you came up to the first corner, ready for something to pop out at you. The moment he would relinquish forcing you forward, you'd be ready to turn and run out of there, or at the very least make him go first.

“I did try to warn you. Call it just desserts.” He whispered in your ear.

“Bastard.” You aimlessly swatted behind you.

You rounded the corner and sighed with relief as nothing came jumping, dropping, or rushing toward you. Simply another green arrow leading ahead where your reflections bounced off the walls.

“See.” He soothed. “Nothing to be afraid of, just a mirror maze, as you predicted."

You sighed a breath and stepped forward without his prompting.

"Jesus!" He shouted as something flew across the hall.

Simultaneously, you forcefully backed into him. Jensen wrapped his arms protectively around you and took a few cautious steps back. The thing stopped swinging, and as your eyes adjusted to see it in the dark, laughter consumed you both. It was a tattered pinata in the form of a UFO. A piece of gray tissue paper floated to the floor from a growing patch of plain cardboard underneath.

“You were so fucking scared.” Jensen placed his hand over his torso, trying to catch his breath.

“So!” You said defensively. “You were just as scared.”

“Oh, no. Not at all.” He lied with enough conviction; he convinced himself as well. “I didn’t want you to feel embarrassed.”

“Sure.” You rolled your eyes, not buying it for a second. “Then I implore you to lead the way,” You gestured forward with your outstretched hand. “Oh, brave one.”

He rolled his shoulders and cracked his neck as if he was getting into character. “Fine.” He agreed. “I got this.” His voice seemed to deepen, and he reached out his hand to you. “You coming, sweetheart?”

The asshole dared to seal it with a wink. And despite yourself, a blush warmed your cheeks, and your toes curled momentarily, but your shyness did not stop you from taking his hand in yours.

As Jensen led the way, he let out a general warning to anyone in the nearby vicinity. “If anyone is running around or jumping out in a green suit, I will not be held liable for when they get punched square in the face.”

You snickered. “I don’t think they have the budget for scare actors, Jensen.”

You came up to the first wall. The mirrors distorted the way forward. One was smudged with fingerprints which made it obvious the wrong path, but for the others, Jensen reached out his free hand and felt the way forward.

It was a short maze, yet you still managed to run face-first into one mirror. After the maze came another jump scare. Both of you held your breath and squinted your eyes as if not wanting to tip the other off it had gotten you, yet the grip on each other’s hands tightened, giving it away. This led to the next section; a room filled with punching bags made to look like rockets that you had to squirm through. It smelled of sweaty socks and Cheetos. You mastered the slanted room, where you had to walk on an angle to traverse, and featured an old aquarium filled with green algae with the shadowed, mysterious blob floating inside.

You both paused at the ladder, plunging into a pool-sized ball pit. Moons, planets, and glow-in-the-dark stars decorated the ceiling above. Foam UFO saucers and blow-up alien dolls accompanied the balls in the pit. There was no way to walk around or over it; the only way was through. And you thought the stench from the punching bags was bad. But you had made it this far. You weren’t going to give up now.

Jensen forwent the ladder and jumped straight. You took the more delicate approach, sliding in inch-by-inch as if trying to adjust to cold water. Once you were finally in the pit, the balls came up to your waist. There were probably rogue toddlers lost in here that haunted the place and bit unsuspecting tourists’ ankles.

“This is disgusting,” Jensen complained, wading through with his arms raised as if to reduce the spread of bacteria. “I swear to god, if I step on a diaper, I’m suing.”

“I’m taking the longest, hottest shower tonight.” You agreed, stating that you needed to be disinfected.

He turned back to look at you. His eyes almost glowed as they raked over you.

“To burn my skin off.” You clarified.

Jensen opened his mouth, but then he swallowed and held his breath. He was channeling too much of Dean to make it through this hellhole, and he couldn’t trust what words would come out. Besides, he had already let several comments slide today, and that was when he wasn’t competing with his other half.

“Stop gaping and get a move on,” You threw two balls at him, which he caught with ease. “Or should I remind you what you are currently festering in?”

But then you saw the balls in his hand, and you spit out a laugh, nearly doubling over, but thankfully stopped yourself from going fully under. They were both blue.

He held back his laughter, but only for a second, as he said, “Very mature,” and then chucked them back at you before making a mad dash to escape the pit of disgust.

It just made you laugh even harder at how ridiculous he looked, failing to gain any speed or traction. After a painstakingly long ‘swim,’ you both made it out. After spending a full day in the car, you thought it would have been impossible to feel more grimy. The ball pit had proved you wrong.

As you wiped yourself down and readjusted your clothing, you came up on a bridge through a dark tunnel. The tunnel was lit with blue lights and neon streaks of pink and green. As Jensen crossed the threshold, the tunnel spun in a vortex, and he stumbled. You knew it was going to be a problem.

You took a step forward, and your ankle gave out, and nausea crept in.

“Wait, Jensen, please.” You complained and reached out to him.

He could sense the change in your tone and wasn’t going to give you shit about it. “Come here.”

You took another step forward and grabbed the railing for dear life as your knees buckled. You tensed and shook your head no. There was a greenish look to you, but he couldn’t tell if it was only because of the lights. Jensen came to you slowly and leaned against the rail, struggling himself.

“Put your head down and hold on to me. It’ll be over quickly.” He assured.

You buried your face between his shoulder blades, and despite the day, he smelled amazing, like cedar with a hint of rosemary. Jensen took it one step at a time, feeling the effect too, but eventually, he got you both to the other side. You both took a deep breath at the end.

“You feeling okay?” He rested his hand on your shoulder and took you in, searching for any lasting effects.

“Yeah. Thank you.” You softly said, slightly embarrassed. “I hate those things. Had I known we would have had to cross the seven circles of hell to get to whatever this mystery is, I would have reconsidered.”

He patted the back of your head, relieved to have your snarkiness back. “You’re not admitting I was right, are you?”

You scoffed and rolled your eyes. “Never.”

In this room, spotlights highlighted text and pictures featuring crop circles and a crash site from the darkness. And in the middle of the room was an opaque silver box with a viewing hole where blue light shone.

“Alright, let’s see what all this was about.” Jensen was the first to peer in. “Oh, you are not going to believe this, Scully.” He stepped aside so you could take a look.

“You are definitely the Scully of this situation. I want to believe.” You corrected.

You stepped back and pinched your lips together, containing a smile.

“Was it worth it?” He asked.

“Every penny.”

****

Though you were ready for dinner, you both agreed finding a hotel and cleaning up was the higher priority. Cell service was still abysmal, so with directions from the mystery spot employee, down a ways and a few turns later, you found the motel that was advertised on the highway sign.

The single-level motel had white siding, green shutters, and a matching green roof. Porch swings hung between every room. A courtyard decorated with mosaic tiles, flowering bushes, and patio furniture suited for a French cafe separated the motel from the parking lot. The property sat on the edge of a lake where trees and shrubs secluded this alcove from the fields around it. A fire pit and kayaks were in the green grass that bordered the water.

“This is actually really nice.” Jensen sighed with delight.

After checking in, showering, and changing, the last thing you wanted to do was get back in the car. Ordering pizza and letting your feet soak in the lake off the dock was the only thing on your mind. Yet the hostess who checked you in raved about a nearby bar visitors had to check out. It wasn’t that far, there was plenty of daylight left, and they featured some local craft beer Jensen was eager to try.

The hostess had failed to mention that this was not only a bar; it was a line-dancing bar. The wooden frame was decorated to the brim with antique farmhouse equipment, country attire, awards, and pictures of dance leagues that had won competitions throughout the year. It was almost as if Cracker Barrel and Dave & Busters’ had a love child. It was packed to the brim with locals dancing and drinking. Your table overlooked the center stage, and somehow they all could interpret the caller shouting out dance moves over music featuring Brooks & Dunn, The Village People, and Alan Jackson.

Though it was loud, it was a great setting for people-watching, and after a full day of conversation, your brain was thankful for the distraction. After the cupcake debacle, Jensen opted for a salad though the cheeseburger was calling his name. He also had a small flight of the local craft brews, his favorite being a wheat ale featuring orange peels and cardamom. There was also a crushable IPA, but other than those two, you agreed the others were just meh.

“You going to give the dance floor a spin after food?” Jensen asked, moving around the food on his plate.

You laughed. “Oh no, I have two left feet and am prone to injuries. Though if you are looking for a partner, there is a girl at the bar who has been strongly admiring the back of your head for a solid fifteen minutes. Don’t look!” But as he did, you reached over and grabbed one of the beers he showed no interest in.

“Ah, she is not my type.” He looked back, playfully scowling at you momentarily as he realized part of his flight was missing.

“And what is your type?” You asked as you sipped on it.

“A question which you never answered,” He pointed out. “Don’t think I forgot.”

“Having a type is so limiting.” You concluded and threw your napkin over your unfinished food.

“I’ll give you mine if you give me yours.” He goaded.

You leaned back, considering. “I think some of the most important things are someone I can laugh with, but also someone who can deep dive into serious conversation, whether that is personal or academic. Someone who shows interest in my hobbies and passions and someone who pushes me to explore ones I hadn’t considered. It’s way more about the natural chemistry than physical appearance.”

“Indulge me anyways,” He requested. “I’m sure you had a checklist at one point.”

“Of course. What kind of person doesn’t create a checklist at some point in their life?” You asked and he snickered. “Let’s see… I have to go back to middle school… plays guitar was high up on the list, has a car, green eyes, freckles.” You cleared your throat and quickly added. “Dark, long, curly hair, loves animals, has that lower abdomen V thing.” You signaled with your hands, and Jensen laughed. “Shut up.”

“Those are actually very hard to get and maintain.” He commented.

“You asked for the list; I gave you the list.” You defended. When he didn’t say anything further, you questioned, “What about you? It’s your turn.”

“I agree with you. Compatibility and the relationship part matter more than the physical attraction. It’s hard to get out of that mindset sometimes, being in an industry where that is such an important aspect to the point where it sets unrealistic standards. But at the end of the day, when I am looking for someone to settle down with, I expect to get old, wrinkly, gray, and saggy. I’d much rather do that with someone I share a deep friendship with rather than some chick it barely works with but is on the runway now, and we’re together partially because we look good in pictures together.” He ranted.

“While I appreciate and respect that answer, you are totally copping out.” You challenge.

“Ah.” He groaned. “Humor is up there, someone who will laugh with me. Someone who is kind but can also dish it out. Someone who is a good listener but is also open with me. Mutual trust.”

“Again, all lovely, mature traits. Where is your middle school diary?” You prodded, biting your lip.

“Fine, fine. Must love dogs, could ride a horse bareback, drove a Jeep Wrangler, would want to go surfing together, gets along with my friends, and looks like Kelly Kapowski from Saved by the Bell. Satisfied?”

You smiled widely. “Very much so.”

He stood up, “Wipe that shit-eating grin off your face and come dance with me.”

He held out his hand to you, and this time you did not hesitate or push back. Spending time with the man was the highlight of your life. You’d follow him anywhere and take every opportunity that came your way.

Jensen led you to the dance floor, and as the group reset for a new song, you slid into the back of the line. The floor was filled with old and young alike. This one little place brought the whole community together. Some wore cowboy hats and boots, others in casual wear, and a few of the older women dressed up for an evening out.

As the announcer set up and called instructions for the next song that you wouldn’t have understood even if the ancient sound system didn’t muffle it, you leaned over to Jensen.

“You better not say something cliche like ‘follow my lead’ or something.” You warned.

“Oh, hell no.” He agreed. “You are completely on your own, and it is going to be hilarious.”

You were tempted to resort to teasing violence when the music started, and you both stared at each other in disbelief as others in the crowd cheered with anticipation. You weren’t sure how or why, but Fate did have her hand in this day somehow.

“I hate this fucking song.” You muttered. “You can’t line dance to this song.”

“You can line dance to any song. Especially our song.” He smiled.

“Don’t…” You held out a finger.

But the speaker began the count “5, 6, 7, 8” as Neil Diamond began to sing about his sweet Caroline.

In a panicked flurry, you watched the others in front of you and tried to mirror their steps. The terms being called out, such as walk, sugarfoot, and rock-recover, had no meaning to you. Jensen picked it up easily, adding a certain air of swagger to just the basic moves. It seemed once you had a pattern down, they changed it on you. You bumped into Jensen and then the person next to you. Realizing you were not going to master the steps anytime soon, Jensen grabbed you from behind, wrapping his arms around your waist, and swayed with you, generally keeping up with the direction of the room but lost in your own little world.

After another round of drinks increasing your confidence, five more songs where you became somewhat familiar with the caller’s instructions, and plenty of laughter from stepping on each other’s feet, you finally called it a night and headed back to the motel.

Taking advantage of the last rays of daylight before the sun set over the horizon, you lazily sat on the porch swing. The haunting and lonely call of a loon echoed over the lake. With your nose in a book, you gently push back and forth with one foot.

“Watch ya reading?” Jensen asked as you felt the weight of the bench shift as he sat down next to you.

Literally, men always picked the worse part of books to interrupt. Nearing the end of the chapter, you turned so he could see the cover but that you could continue reading.

He sounded out the title “Remarkably Bright Creatures” and then asked, “Is it any good?”

You slipped the postcard you used as a bookmark back into the book and set it down. “It’s so cute. This octopus named Marcellus is helping this older woman solve the murder of her son. Think A Man Called Ove meets Finding Nemo meets Poirot.”

He softly chuckled. “I really only know Finding Nemo, but that sounds like quite the combination.”

You looked out over the lake and saw a large family, or perhaps even two, who started up the fire pit and began roasting marshmallows for smores.

“You wanna get cozy by the fire?” You nodded in their direction.

“Nah. Probably turn on a game or something.” He rubbed the back of his neck and then settled his arm on the back of the bench, grazing your shoulder. “I just came to check on you before I turn in for the night.”

His soft green eyes caught the last bits of sun before it finally set, and the sky was left a hue of pink and purple. The porch lights flickered on. A kid screamed with excitement as a game of tag ensued near the water's edge.

“So,” You started. “First day of the road trip. Success?”

“Way better than I could have hoped for.” He beamed.

“Mystery spot and all?” You reminded him.

Mystery spot and all.” He confirmed.

“What’s on the agenda for tomorrow?” You asked.

He scoffed. “Agenda? Wherever the road takes us.”

You nodded. “I can live with that. So long as we have a few adventures like today. You truly had fun?” A bit of insecurity was bubbling up.

“Y/N.” He called your name softly.

His gaze danced between your eyes and lips. That sensation of him wrestling between what he should and shouldn’t do struck you again as it had several times already today. Your eyes flickered to his lips, and your heart thudded against your chest. He had the slightest scar just above the cupid's bow. His hand wove through your hair as he leaned in. His lips were soft and gentle against yours, his eyelashes brushed against your skin, and still, your soul ascending with his to another plane of existence. It lasted mere seconds. When he pulled away, the loon cried out in the distance.

“Good night, Y/N. See ya tomorrow.”

And just like that, he got up and left for his room while you sat paralyzed, heart fluttering inside your chest.

---

Part 5

[mikeyforreal]

some random adrian chase head cannons :P

a/n: just some random thought about my favorite crime-fighting goofball :)

cw: fluff, some cussing, a few depictions of violence

miscellaneous hcs

• okay so first off, i know this isn't really a head cannon but james gunn confirmed that the visor in vig's suit is prescription and idk i just love that fact

• anyway, real head cannons now

• i'm like 99.99% sure he has a playlist for when he's on patrol and makes chris listen to it with him

• also, i think he'd have the same wired earphones from like 2014 that came with his iphone 6

• adrian's favorite candy is probably skittles or m&ms because of the fun colors (sometimes he likes to sort them if he's feeling a bit bored)

• i just know he has a collection of vhs tapes that he bought from a secondhand store/had as a kid

• speaking of collections he probably also has a bunch of cd's

• i dunno why but i feel like adrian loves star wars and has since he was little (and also has all the og trilogy movies on vhs)

• definitely has a cheap walmart lightsaber lying around somewhere

• GOLDEN RETRIEVER ENERGY !!!

• i feel like as a kid he loved finding bugs, digging for worms, ect.

• one time he tried eating one, didn't turn out good for him (he couldn't stop throwing up for like 3 days)

• since it's cannon he played/plays dnd, he'd probably play magic, the gathering as well 😭

• i also think that he'd really love the artificial grape flavor ??

• LMAO i think he'd have a little chainsaw keychain lying around somewhere

• def listens to abba, spice girls, and yung gravy

• probably good with kids? he'd set the the house on fire if he watched some but he can keep them entertained at least ?

• manchild (i will not elaborate)

• he reminds me of jake peralta from brooklyn-99

being best friends/in a relationship with adrian

• let's face it, they're practically the same thing

• i justttt know that he made like 10 secret handshakes for the two of you

• his love language is probably words of affirmation, quality time, or touch (maybe all of them, who knows)

• wants to teach you how to play mtg and dnd !!! (please let him teach you he'll be over the moon)

• def has a playlist that he wants to listen to with you

• two words: movie dates

• adrian loves watching movies with you !! even if he's seen it a few dozen times, he'd watch it again just to see your first time reactions :)

• THEMED COSTUMES !!!

• if you're down, he'd want to match with you ever year, something different and cooler than the last

• if you wear glasses, you better bet your ass that he's switching with you 24/7

• you cant go an hour without your glasses getting taken off and replaced with his

• also, i think that adrian wouldn't have the cleanest glasses 😭 you def gotta give 'em a good scrub every now and then

• dr. pepper enthusiast fs

• discounted/sometimes free food and fennel fields

• if you can work from home and go there often just to eat and work, he's definitely spending his 15 minute breaks (and longer than that) sitting with you and chatting

• he's always bringing home leftovers or breadsticks that he stole

• i think adrian has a pretty decent comic collection, and would go to shops with you for dates or hangouts

• he's probably super good friends with the owner (or at least that's what he thinks)

• when he's patrolling, he randomly facetimes you???

• like he has a guy near death and he's having a full conversation with you

• adrian has tonsss of silly and random nicknames for you !! he just calls you whatever you remind him of

• whenever he goes over to your place or vice versa, you two have a special knock that lets either of you know immediately who it is

• one of his ideal dates would probably be going to the park and feeding ducks !! (and him trying to catch them)

• he also randomly makes machine gun noises ?? what's that about ??

• the two of you'll just be chilling watching tv or something and then you hear 'CHCHCHCHC' and see him doing finger guns or whatever

• and when you ask him about it he's just like "what do you mean babe?"

• would probably beg you to get a little cat or a dog

• if you initially say no, he's gonna pull out a whole powerpoint presentation on why you should say yes (and he's wearing his fanciest clothes)

• FRIENDSHIP BRACELETS !!!

• it doesn't matter where or what they look like, if he sees some at the gas station, store, theme park, wherever, he's buying some for the two of you

• your relationship is basically that one scene in bobs burgers scene where tina makes a friendship bracelet for louise and tina's like "oh you don't have to wear it" and louise snatches it and says "no i'm gonna wear it forever, back off"

• proud malewife

• adrian is in the kitchen a lot, always fixing up snacks for you

a/n: let me know if i should make another one of these with another character !

[what-if-doctor-who-was-yuri]

95 https://www.tumblr.com/quadruple-a-battery-under-ur-bed/754072180004929536/weird-asks-that-say-a-lot?source=share

95. favorite app on your phone?

OKAY i have a load of handy dandy non shitty apps on my phone which i really like having so ima make a list: (these r for android btw most prolly arent on ios yet so uh. switch if u can at some point it is so much better over here trust) 1) FDROID - basically google play store but all apps are foss (afaik) and also stuff that goes against gplay tos (like yt to mp3 apps) but also just. normal apps lol theres links to the github repo on every app + it lists "antifeatures" (like dependent on external service (ie: website like yt or wikipedia so its not just on ur phone) n shit like that!! u can get most of the apps im mentioning here via fdroid and its risk free! u do need to install the fdroid apk which looks a little dodgy if u dont know what ur doing but yk w/e 2) novalauncher - no clue if this is on fdroid but its on the playstore so like. its fine this is a much more customisable launcher (like standard icon pack support if ur device dont got that, half grid, shit tons customisation) and i use it on litterally every android device i have bc its just so good and consisitent lmfao 3) icon pack studio - another play store one but this lets u make custom icon packs! basically u controll things like icon position, colour, shadow, scale, tile colour, shape, effects, etc! it doesnt work great for every app + u gotta re-exoport it whenever u install new apps BUT IT COVERS EVERYTHING i use it loads 4) genius - another playstore one its just handy u can set it to have a little notif u can click on to get the lyrics for a song if they have em + u can make little lyric cards which r super duper funky i love em 5) kustom widget - NAOTHER playstore one IM SORRY ILL STOP SOON I SWEAR but it lets u make custom widgets AND ITS SO CUSTOMISABLE its also really complex but like. its still easier than app dev so like. i used it to make a widget of my cat that opens the gallery when i click on it ^^ 6) RI MUSIC - THIS IS AN FDROID ONE - its basically yt music premium but with a different UI and free and much more customisable its soo sfadjfghasjdhgg its a fork of vimusic but it works better its so good it also supports yt playlists so if u use yt music SWITCH TO THIS] 7) wikipedia - its on fdroid and play store yall know what it is the app is great also does dark mode without having to dive into fifteen settings etc 8) i forgor the app name but its free spotify premium its 10/10 no notes (when i say free premium i mean permenant but its just ad free and actual control over the songs so no downloads or anything sadly :( 9) spotiflyer!! - it was on fdroid but its been changed to an extention of smthn it was great when it was an app havent looked into the extention ver yet- if u have a pc use zotify instead its a cli but its much faster and more reliable (change the output folder + file name to just be the track number to avoid it skipping songs w funky chars in it u can use mp3tag to fix the names it gets the metadata also dont forget to download as mp3 or its big) basically spotiflyer and zotify r spotify to mp3 but spotiflyer also does other platofrms like yt music n shit spotiflyer broke now but i was its number one stan lmao

[prettyrealm]

ASTROLOGY PLAYLIST FOR PISCES ♓︎

1. unconditional - tinashe

you don't call me, take my pulse i cant feel it anymore, waiting on my love to walk through the door…keep my hopes up every time i don't even know how we set the bar so low, i forgive you for whatever you've done to me.. push me away then wonder where, where is the one who always cared?...so i guess if you want me you got me baby i'm yours now..

2. sick joke - neck deep

and most days, it all feels the same i can't tell no difference in pleasure and pain and it makes me sick, sick joke like life is shoving its fingers to the back of my throat...i’m questioning everything and it's affecting all my decisions, i saw you in the mirror and switched up my rhythm, am i chasing a dream or am i caught in the middle of it?

3. swap it out - justin bieber

open up to me, it's all you gotta do...give me all your heart, i'll swap mine out with you...you come into my world, i'll give my world to you...don't separate our destiny by separating you from me..

[extraterezi]

when I was still high on gomens fumes I made this playlist inspired by s2, with 6 songs for aziraphale and crowley each. explanations and meta under the cut if youre still in the trenches <3

Crowley

1. The Way I Feel Inside - The Zombies

Should I try to hide the way I feel inside my heart for you?

Just felt like this song had Crowley vibez. Obviously about him pining away while still keeping a distance.

2. Seaside Rendezvous - Queen

I feel so romantic, can we do it again? Can we do it again sometime? (Ooh, I'd like that)

Gotta have at least one Queen track for Crowley! This one's for the two of them gallivanting around, enjoying earthly pleasures in their favorite company. I just think this song perfectly captures the Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck on a vespa typa dates they seem to go on all the time.

3. Rebel Yell - Billy Idol

With a rebel yell, she cried more, more, more

This song goes SO HARD!! It's my absolute favorite at the moment. It makes me think of Crowley feeling righteous and amped up about his and Aziraphale's secret rebellion against the system, and feeling justified about loving him. Sometimes Aziraphale's reluctancy to let go of heaven doesn't make Crowley feel frustrated and sad, sometimes it just makes it feel more meaningful when Aziraphale keeps coming back for more, as if despite his better judgement he can't stay away.

4. Makes Me Wonder - Maroon 5

Give me something to believe in 'Cause I don't believe in you anymore, anymore

Kind of an unexpected addition to this playlist, but I do think that you need an angry power song in every playlist about pining over your best friend. It sucks!!! Aziraphale can be a dick and frustrating as all hell to deal with, and when you're as full of angst as Crowley it's hard to show good faith and trust that he doesn't mean it like that (and sometimes knowing that makes it even worse). And that's when you need a song that makes you feel cool and justified and PISSED.

5. Cry Me A River - Julie London

And now you say you love me Well, just to prove you do Come on and cry me a river Cry me a river I cried a river over you

This is the song that started it all. It came up on shuffle and then I listened to it like 36 times, thinking about Crowley the whole time. It's his sassy sadgirl anthem for after S2. He's past despair, and now he's just bitter... I want him to stay mad in S3, it's such a great look on him. An apology isn't enough, Aziraphale needs to get wise.

6. These Foolish Things (Remind Me Of You) - Ella Fitzgerald, Louis Armstrong

These things are dear to me They seem to bring you near to me

This was originally going to be an Aziraphale song, but I love the idea that while Crowley likes earth, he always felt some disdain for how his stars had been demoted to but a backdrop for this new main character of the universe, and instead it was through Aziraphale he fell in love with humanity. All of Aziraphale's special interests are silly little human eccentricities! No wonder Crowley looks at the world around him and sees nothing but Aziraphale everywhere, even after he's gone.

Aziraphale

7. Can't Take My Eyes Off You - Frankie Valli

You're just too good to be true Can't take my eyes off of you You'd be like heaven to touch I want to hold you so much

I've always connected this song with that fantastic and silly scene with Heath Ledger in 10 Things I Hate About you, so I was not prepared for how devastated I would get listening to this song while thinking about Aziraphale. The first line makes me think about how he still sees Crowley as an angel, which is a whole jar of beans and just hurtful to think about. Then the second line is about him spending 6000 years gazing lovingly at Crowley. And then after several turns of quiet dreamy romance the song switches pace to this grand declaration of love that Aziraphale would never make. Ever. But still thinks in his mind constantly and ouch ouch ouch.

8. Tea For Two - Blossom Dearie

I'm discontented with homes that are rented So I have invented my own

This, of course, is about the house in South Downs, and this vague idea of escaping somewhere with Crowley. I don't think Aziraphale has actually considered it yet, it's just a fleeting feeling he gets whenever Crowley talks about Alpha Centuri, or whenever he's reminded of the inevitability of them being found out and separated. I do like how this song makes it sound like he's the one tempting Crowley, and in that presumptuous and matter of fact tone Aziraphale always uses. "Oh Crowley, nothing lasts forever." We can go somewhere better. But Aziraphale hasn't realized the core of this song and want yet, that this needs to be away from the judging eyes of heaven and hell both.

9. He Needs Me

No one ever asked before Before because they never needed me (But I do) But he does Maybe it's because he's so alone Maybe it's because he's never had a home

To me this song feels like a halting realization. Over time, or after one eventful and intense conversation (the conversation), where your mind is reeling and you're stumbling through the memory of what was said and how and what it all means. And it's scary and good and oh no maybe I was wrong all along and wow, maybe I was wrong all along. Like not quite getting it yet but piecing it together. And it's sung yet again in that presumptuous, almost patronizing tone, while still feeling a bit childish.

(Aziraphale isn't stupid, he just has that simultaneously extra high and extra low empathy that seems very common for autistic people that makes it harder to navigate the world and relationships (yes, hi, welcome to my autistic Azi agenda). He often has this confused little furrow in his brow and I think this is why. In conversations with Crowley he understands the subtleties but misses big obvious things, cherry picking and making assumptions that he then holds as facts to bring into their next interaction. In the end of their last conversation Aziraphale is confused enough about Crowley's words and reactions that he's forced to question his earlier "deductions" and reevaluate everything, which will hopefully turn into true understanding when he's finished processing. I have a lot to say about this whole concept but it's a bit halfbaked so I might come back to it.)

The verse I picked hits hard in two parts: Aziraphale is so proud of being an angel, but in a pretty obvious defense mechanism kinda way. He's always known deep down that he's not what heaven expects or needs from him, and the other angels consistently dismiss and ignore him. And so Aziraphale believes, in true christian fashion, that while he tries (almost too much) to be good he is inherently evil, flawed, in a way an angel shouldn't be, because he feels human emotions and questions things. This naturally gives him a lot of imposter syndrome - his peers never see him as anything other than a cog in the heavenly machine, making his only purpose being an angel, which he deep down believes he's thoroughly failing at. "No one ever asked before because they never needed me" feels like it refers to how no one sees or needs him, because all they see is something he can't be.

The second part is (pretty self-explanatory) about Crowley. Not good enough to be an angel, not bad enough to be a demon. Just like Aziraphale.

10. Angel Eyes - Ella Fitzgerald

Try to think that love's not around But it's uncomfortably near My old heart ain't gaining no ground Because my angel eyes ain't here Angel eyes, that old Devil sent They glow unbearably bright

Here's some ominous jazz to complement Crowley's Cry Me A River. I'm obsessed with how this song just churns in your chest. I love a fancy lounge jazz typa sound for them, especially when it's darker like this.

"My angel eyes" is at first a metaphor for Aziraphale's heavenly judgement/morals that he's losing sight of the closer he gets to Crowley, the line between good and evil getting blurred and him becoming progressively more human. As the song continues it becomes clear that the angel eyes are Crowley's. Aziraphale still remembers Crowley as an angel, evident by the way he keeps insisting he sees good in him and then asking him to become an angel once again in the end of S2. And as we all know Crowley's angel eyes glow unbearably bright indeed.

11. Goodbye Yellow Brick Road - Elton John

So goodbye yellow brick road Where the dogs of society howl You can't plant me in your penthouse I'm going back to my plough Back to the howling old owl in the woods Hunting the horny back toad Oh, I've finally decided my future lies Beyond the yellow brick road

Although this song is originally about wanting to leave a world of fame and go back to a more quiet rural life, I've interpreted the idea of returning to your roots as something more like giving up - Aziraphale at the end of S2, deciding to stop chasing after this imaginary dream at the end of the yellow brick road, and resigning himself to just doing his job, thwarting evil and working for the man. I know reading "the howling old owl in the woods" as god and heaven, and "the horny back toad" as demons is a bit more on the nose than the charming and nostalgic original meaning, but before I researched this song it really did feel more resigned and like a bad ending. I also really like the penthouse bit, cause while in the original it's referring to opulence and excess, in my context it sounds like it's referring to Crowley's modern flat, and him wanting to plant Aziraphale in a little pot among his other plants..

12. Absentee - Cass McCombs

Walking on the country road late last night I passed a stranger in the moonlight I turned around to see Where he did flee But there was just me Return the deep Absentee

I like how the "country road" line kinda ties back to the last song, the rural country representing heaven, and this road being in stark contrast to the yellow brick one. Fun how the aesthetics are flipped too.

This song makes me nervous, and sad. As Aziraphale walks into the elevator he turns back to see Crowley, leaning on the Bentley, still waiting for him. Aziraphale is the one leaving.

[jennahmariawrites]

So as a writer, one thing that I’m frequently asked is “how do I come up with so many ideas?” And “how do I develop my characters?” And honestly? I don’t entirely have answers for this. My characters and my ideas come to me, they speak to me in the white void of space that lives in my head. My stories are so much a part of me that coming up with ideas and creating characters is second nature.

But, I do have a few tips that I, personally, find helpful.

1. The first step is becoming obsessed with your characters. You must be to them what a YA love interest is to the spunky heroine. “I think about you constantly, you’re the last thing I think about when I go to bed and the first thing I think about when I wake up, the mere thought of you consumes my every waking moment, and even then, you sometimes slip into my dreams” - yeah that but it’s just you about your own characters.

2. Talk to them! I can’t stress this enough, nothing helps me get to know my characters more than holding conversations with them. I constantly imagine conversations between myself and my characters, or I’ll even write our conversations as well. Heck sometimes I voice them and switch between me and “my character’s” voice. Is it probably stupid? Yeah, but it’s fun, I enjoy it, and nobody else has to know…except all of you people now, I guess.

3. Put them in everything! By this I mean, find incorrect quotes that fit them, make them kill each other in hunger games simulators, make quizzes for them, take quizzes for them, make alignment charts for them, aesthetics, moon boards, playlists, figure out their wardrobe, sort them into anything and everything, heck, find out what kind of bagel they would be! Literally just put them in anything, trust me, it helps.

4. Ask them questions! So back when I was like, idk, 15? I made a list of 80 (it was supposed to be 100 but I gave up, maybe I’ll go through one day and add 20 more) random questions to ask my characters, and then I’d just pick a number and answer that question for my characters. I’d do this however many times I wanted until I had to stop, and let me tell you, these questions ranged from “what is an irrational fear they have?” To “what would their funeral be like?” And the wide variety of questions really helped me get to know them better. I still go back and answer these questions whenever I want.

5. Listen to them. Listen, at the end of the day, these are your characters, and while I can tell you all the random, borderline obsessive stuff I do with my characters, I can’t promise these will help you. Take my character building tips as a grain of salt, but listen to your characters. If you have OCs, you know that they don’t listen to you, they do whatever the heck they want and you just gotta keep up with them, but I guarantee that those characters are in that head of yours and they know who they are, so don’t try to fight them, don’t try to force them to be something they’re not, listen to them and do whatever feels natural when it comes to them.

Alright, these have been Jennah’s tips on how to obsess over your own characters, feel free to add your own in the comments!

[class-1b-bull]

hi!

sorry if this makes you uncomfortable but 1B with a spouse/friend who is trans?

you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to :)

I actually really like the request! Im trans myself so I love the representation <3

Not proofread we die like men

Awase -

Hes the aggressive straight friend every trans person has. Like if youre a trans man hes screaming HEY MY MAN, LOOK AT THIS DUDEEE and shit like that everytime he sees you <3 (same works reversed for other trans ppl I just used trans men as an example <3)

Sen -

Genuinely interested about your struggles and the process of transitioning (if you choose to do so) he wants to help you anyway he can! You will not feel disphoric when hes around.

Kamakiri -

He 100% asked if you wanted him to give you bottom/ top surgery. Hes your ride or die if you want him to he will. Im sure theres a youtube tutorial for it. Will punch transphobes for you <3

Kuroiro -

The second you tell him your trans he goes on this long ass emo rant about how "to be born in the skin of another is the deepest type of dispair." Or whatever. Supportive asf tho.

Kendo -

Shes so sweet and helps you with anything you need <3 (if your enby she will ask nezu if UA can invest in gender neutral bathrooms and omg)

Kodai -

"K.." thats it. That was her reaction to finding out. She treats you the way she always has. Nothing can make her change the way she views you (you will always be her friend I mean lol)

Komori -

She somehow knew you were trans before you knew. The second you told her she just said finally as she pulled out a trans flag to give you lmao. Shes so sweet about it <3

Shiozaki -

Once you tell her she tells you the entire bible story where jesus helped a trans man (i think it was a trans man im not sure) and how she would help you the way he helped that man <3

Shishida -

The first thing he does is clarify your preferred pronouns, name and what prefixes you prefer (sir, mam, mr, mrs, mx, ect.) Afterwards he will just gently correct people if they accidentally misgender you <3

Shoda -

He buys little gifts for you as a congratulations on coming out (candy, pride pin ect.) He also helps with anything you need (he tries to anyways)

Pony -

If you were a girl shes just worried about what will happen to yalls girl days, overall tho she is really happy for you! The two of you definitely go shopping together to help you find cool clothes that fit your new self!

Tsubaraba -

"Poggers!" He made a trans flag on your minecraft world to put in your base. If you encounter a wild transphobe he throws a pokeball at them while saying shit like "gotta catch the clown!"

Tetsutetsu -

Hes a little confused but he got spirit! "This is my buddy, hes a man!" "I was a man but now im a woman tetsu..." "WHAT?! so you double trans now!?" Hes supportive as hell tho (also i just used trans women as an example it can be switched however)

Tokage -

"Thats cool." She immediately started making you a custom 'bad bitch' playlist. She gives off the same energy as the 'I got you a gay cake cuz its rainbow so it gay cuz ya gay' woman

Manga -

Nothing changed honestly, you told him, he started using your preferred name and pronouns and thats kinda it. He did give you skittles on a convince store run "cuz ya gay" (hes a little confused but he got spirit pt.2)

Honenuki -

You are not allowed to feel disphoric around him. He will make sure you feel comfortable and happy with how you are >:( if youre in the process of transitioning he makes sure to point out if you seem more mac/fem (if youre fine with it i mean)

Bondo -

I like to think he knows how to sew, so he definitely thrifted a bunch of random cheep cloths and sewed them to make you a custom trans flag with your preferred name engraved in the corner <3

Monoma -

He will beat the shit out of anyone that comes at you (its actually kinda scary) even on the internet if someone purposely misgenders you he is messaging them their exact coordinates lol

Reiko -

She is so nice about the whole thing <3 she uses her quirk to scare the shit out of transphobic ppl and she makes sure to help you when you feel disphoric <3

Rin -

He relates to the hate you can get for being trans so he knows how hard it can be (in that aspect at least.) So he makes sure to check in with you often <3 (also why do transphobic ppl see dudes with long hair and assume theyre trans? Lmao)

My cat brought a big ass bug to me and just sat it on my lap when I was writing this lmao.

Shes a little shit sometimes but I love her <3

[pjunicornart]

Cut Songs

Just to give you an idea of how much work I put into my Cornelius x Franny playlist, here is a list of songs that were cut from it, with explanations as to why. 1. Eraser Girl by Maretu - Oh man, this song is dark... Before I had a concrete theme, I had a lot of "dark love" songs on there, this being one of them. This song in particular ends with both partners committing suicide together. 2. In The Bedroom, Royal Suite, Secret Grotto, Private Table, and Rooftop Lounge from HuniePop - Cut for one reason... THEY'RE NOT ON SPOTIFY. It sucks because these songs are PERFECT. UGH. 3. Boom Boom Boom by KIRA - Couldn't make it fit... unfortunately. Real sad because this a song you could easily imagine Neil and Franny singing... well, vocaloid versions of them, ha ha. 4. Saw and Pendulum by (?) ft. Hatsune Miku - Another dark song I cut once I found a theme. It's a yandere song, and like most yandere songs, someone got murdered. 5. Games by KIRA - Another one I just couldn't make fit. I do plan on doing something with this one, though. 6. Hot Milk by MentaiRocker - Cut because it was too hardcore of a sound for the playlist, and I had settled on the one rock song I was gonna put on the playlist. 7. SYMBIOTIC by Starset - Same as above. 8. Saccharine by Jazmin Bean - This was more of a "love is disgusting" type of song. It was cut very early on. 9. Soap by Melanie Martinez - The vibe didn't quite fit for this one. 10. stillness in woe by Purity Ring - Cut because the lyrics were too cryptic, as well as too "ethereal" sounding. 11. Holy Lance Explosion Boy by rerulili - Not really a love song... more like a "we fucked up so now we gotta stay together" type of song. 12. Two Faced Lovers by wowaka (rip) - Again, wasn't really a love song. Just a dark story about two "lovers." 13. SuperNova by Spott - Because breakcore definitely didn't fit the vibe... oh well... 14. Cosmos Love by Lexie - It's not on Spotify :( 15. Darling by BlueBrony - Also not on Spotify... ugh. The good ones never are. 16. Veni Vidi Vici (Magic) by Scraton - Cut last minute because I couldn't make it fit anywhere. But I also realized that the filter on the samples makes it sound like Boyfriend from Friday Night Funkin' is singing it. 17. Fluffy Chocolate Bunnies by Mr. Sunset - Not. On. Spotify! UGGHHH! That song is so good, too!!!! 18. Breathing Space by DJT and Rusyd Rosman (Shuffle Horse Remix) - Say it with me everybody... it's not on Spotify... 19. Star Lily Dance Performance by MASA WORKS DESIGN - It's part of the Onibi series, and if you know what that means because vocaloid was a part of your childhood like me, then you know exactly why it was cut... 20. Brass Noise Flamenco by MASA WORKS DESIGN - I realized Cornelius and Franny ain't like that, so it was cut. 21. Sick Sick Sick by Pinnochio-P - Another one that was cut last minute because I couldn't quite make it fit. 22. Jenny by Studio Killers - ... I can't not see this as a lesbian love song, I'm sorry y'all. 23. Kuru Kuru Pa! by Lamaze-P - Because I'm gonna make a stand alone piece for this song. I'm inspired, lol. 24. Hole-dwelling by Kikuo - Too depressing for the theme I was going for. 25. But I Like It by Lauren Sanderson - The sound was too hardcore for the theme, same as the others above. 26. La La Lainey by Forever The Sickest Kids - Cut because it's more of a Cornelius x Lizzy song, to be honest... 27. 1980s Horror Film by Wallows - Ah, the good ol' bait and switch. Unfortunately, not good for the playlist. 28. Butterfly's Repose by Zabawa - WAAAAAY too sad for the theme. I ain't tryna make anybody cry. 29. Lemonade by Nicole Dollanganger - Too dark. Ends with murder... 30. Heart Shaped Bed by Nicole Dollanganger - Cut mostly because I have an image idea for this one.

I listen to way too much angst... But hey, all that angst can make for some cool images! Eventually.

[greypetrel]

3 & 4 for all the ocs :3 (or just the ones you want to do if it’s too much 😅)

Nah, not just the ones, we die like heroes and do all of them >:3 (I have collected playlists for each of them, finally)

Starting with 4 which is shorter and adding 3 under the cut.

Thanks for asking! <3

Tis the prompt list

4. a song lyric that describes my muse

Alyra: I'm laying down, eating snow / My fur is hot, my tongue is cold / On a bed of spider web / I think of how to change myself Keep the streets empty for me, Fever Ray

Raina: Sometimes I feel like everybody is a sexy baby / And I'm a monster on the hill / Too big to hang out, slowly lurching towards your favourite city / Pierced through the heart, but never killed. Anti-hero, Taylor Swift

Aisling: Oh the Queen of Peace / Always does her best to please / Is it any use? / Somebody's gotta lose. Queen of Peace, Florence + the Machine

3. a boss battle song for fighting my muse

Alyra: Mordero'Sheen (Bringers of Death), Lorne Balfe I am very normal about the Wheel of Time show. You should watch that show if you haven't, this is your signal to watch it. Anyway: very syncopated rhythm, relentless, gives you a pause? Yeah well, it's starting again stronger. She'll keep up with a serrated rhythm, won't give you time to breathe if not to study you better and trick you, won't get down until she'll be dead. It'll be a hard fight.

Raina: L'Arlesienne Suite n°2 - 4. Farandole, Georges Bizet A mix of heavy and light-hearted and lively, very quick, you can almost dance on it, but it's too fast to follow. And then BAM the whole orchestra jumps in right at your head and it's fucking horns and trumpets screaming the main theme instead of strings for a super power boost. A duel that starts light, she's cracking jokes and playing with you, putting you at ease... and then something switch, when she understands how you fight and... Well, good luck with that, she's agile and strong and doesn't follow a clear strategy that's very easy to read.

Aisling: Thunderstruck, AC/DC A big classic, but the intro... She knows she has the lower hand physically. She's short, she's a Mage, she doesn't have armours that allow her to tank. So she'll try to start before you can see her. You're walking to the duel. Clouds start to gather above you. The air's crackling and electric. All birds are now silent. Thunder starts to boom above, jumping between clouds. It gets more. and more. And more in a crescendo until. BAM, one very precise lighting strikes right in front of you, missing you by maybe 5cm. It's done on purpose: you get screamed to yield, to lower your weapons, as many more lightning circle you, one after the other. She may not be the stronger or quicker... But she moves like she's dancing, is terribly precise with her hits, and oh, yeah, you came with a metal armour? Your bad, metal conducts electricity you know. :) (and, she is also proficient from up close. You think you got closer and you gained the upper hand? Well, maybe not.)

Special mention for Dark Lady Shenanigans: Sanctuary! Alan Menken

[aswho1estuff]

The boys next door

—1.The playboy mansion boys (Ep 1, Pt 4)—

(EP 1)

Masterlist

Plot: 4 best friends are scouted at the opening playboy mansion party by Hazel Harlow herself. Given the opportunity of fame, fortune, and fun on a silver platter can they stomach it ?

Overview: welcome to the party and enjoy! Some food & tag? (Felix)

Felix playlist

Character selection solos

_____Meeting her ____

1. Yuta

2. Yeonjun

3. Felix<-

4. Seonghwa

——————————

Felix

Switch on the sky and the stars glow for you

“I would try the cupcakes first” a pretty woman in black says “they’re don’t have the whipped cream it’s the real stuff” her excitement rubbing off on me “really, white, red, or chocolate?” I ask “Why not all?, but for honesty I like red velvet the most” she grabs one and I follow suit.

Go see the world cause it’s all so brand new

Biting into it right away it’s delicious, this is very much so the real stuff it melts in my mouth. Looking over at her “I might just have to marry you now” causing her to irrupt into fits of laughter “this is no laughing matter madam, I take cupcakes very seriously” I respond.

Don’t close your eyes cause your futures ready to shine

Laughing even more l join in this time act crumbling. Reaching out she swipes my cheek removing the cream to lick it. She’s really pretty like really pretty ………what would be the opposite of a cougar?…a cub idk even, but I definitely gotta stop hanging out with yeonjun so much he’s influencing me.

It’s just a matter of time before we learn how to fly

“That was delicious” I let out rubbing my stomach she agrees noding her head “i almost need to run it off” she laughs. That gives me an idea “let’s run it off” i say turning to look at her “you know I was just kidding, it’ll look crazy just running down the halls” she does have a point.

Welcome to the rhythm of the night

“Well let’s play tag then” I say laughing “alright but you’re it” she responds tapping me fast and pulling her heels off to run as I watch stunned I didn’t think she’d agree.

Theres something in the air you can’t deny

What a cheater I think finally pushing out the chair to follow after her giggling.

It’s been fun but now I’ve got to go

I run down the hall hitting a corner and slow down to see observe this painting….dogs playing poker? gotta get one of those I agree with myself nodding.

Life is way to short to take it slow

“nice ain’t it” I turn to find her leaning over the corner.

But before I got and hit the road

“Hey come here” she says waving me over and I run to her.

I gotta know til then

“For you” “for me?” I respond holding my hands out closing my eyes.

When can I see you again

Opening my eyes I notice it’s a gift bag with a note attached ‘catch me’. Putting in my pocket gently I take off running to find her.

<- Pt. 2 yeonjun Pt. 4 seonghwa->

Masterlist

[lightyearssurrogatedaddy]

gotta say, I've done a thingie or two about how Nine Inch Nails is the perfect sound I associate with Error. Starting with Into the Void and Only. Every song I listen to from them I keep going, "Goddamn, this would be THE soundtrack for him."

Here are the thingies I thinged. I actually did a lot of other songs and I figure I'll finally make one giant post about it

long, just a heads up. I saw a bunch of songs and I fled

Why I think Nine Inch Nails Belongs On Every Error Playlist.

NIN might be my favorite band right now, so I'm listening to it constantly. I've connected the lyrics and sounds to Error and I'm going to explain why. I'm breaking up things into little groups to make things easier.

group 1) Error's stubbornness and anger group 2) his lonely :( group 3) his chaotic nature and weird self-contradictory behavior

If I designed music for Error I'd have a sturdy bassline to rep how unchanging his opinion is, and the playing instruments an electronic mess of thoughts and feelings for his shitty cycle of a mental state. NIN perfectly captures how I envision it soundwise.

Song: Only

The beat and the guitar 100%.

"I've becoming less defined, as days go on by, fading away well you could say I'm losing focus." This is the point where Error starts to feel the effects of real lonesomeness, like with Into The Void, which is just him waking up and realizing his situation, Only is a continuation of it.

"Less concerned with fitting into the world, your world that is." The Stubbornness.

"I just made you up to hurt myself." Error finding a way to cope with the crippling Nothing and lack of company by saying that the only real reason that he felt it to begin with was because he wanted to punish himself for something. And instead he finds more reasons to love things about the Anti-Void than hate it out of spite. Group 1 and 2.

"There is no you, there is only me." Him separating himself from other characters as something entirely different, he feels like he's nothing like them, and that aids in his incredible apathy towards other people, especially those with AUs.

Song: Into The Void

The start of the song adds onto itself bit by bit as it progresses, starting with a simple tune and then adding another intrument, a baseline, and zangy electronic shit. Kind of like waking up.

"Try to save myself, but myself keeps slipping away." The vastness of the void traumatizes everyone, just an empty white that goes on endlessly. I like to think this song could be used to depict Error's feelings about his home, how existentially scary it is and how it effects him.

The rolling tune, where near the three minute mark it swings up and then falls back down again in a sort of out-of-sync and deteriorating way, like a buildup to a strong emotion (anger, stress) and then switching to relief or calmness once it passes, he's dealing with the pressure of his own thoughts. This puts the song in group 2.

Song: GOSSIP (Maneskin)

WIth the hard+heavy beat with the wacky guitar, the sound of the song fits with the theme already.

"So sip the gossip, drink 'til you choke. […] you're not iconic, you are just like them all." Directed at Ink and their disagreements.

"Keep drinking and acting cool […] nobody likes a gloomy face." in reference to how Ink has control over his emotions and yet chooses not to agree with Error.

I think this song could be used to depict Error and Ink's relationship from Error's POV and show why they disagree with different reasons other than, "that one destroys that one protects, obviously they argue about that and only that." Error probably sees Ink defending AUs as not worth the time and energy, something that other people have conditioned him to do or something he thinks is a 'normal guideline' to follow. the irony is that while Error critisizes Ink about letting other people define who he is (even though Ink's actions are actually entirely his own) he himself locks himself up in a box of, "I'm the bad guy, I'm the destroyer. That's my purpose because I've heard it told to me so many times."

But not FGod territory, Error believes wholly in his goal, but embodies it instead of it just being a thing he has faith in. This song goes into group 1.

Song: Squares (That Handsome Devil)

Very nifty 1900's vibe is always welcome. "To refuse would be square. And that terrible label must be avoided at all costs." to add on to what shapes I use to draw Error with. Nobody wants to be Error, he's a square! He probably doesn't drink or do any other mysterious 'get high' activities now that I think about it. This song is once again about Ink and Error's dispute.

"Stupid bastards blasting telling me what's cool." he hates being told what to do, probably has some form of authority problem.

"Sorry girl, you're far behind where it is you draw your line." Error draws the line at Outertale because he's biased, and can't understand why Ink keeps going and accepting new variations. This song goes into group 1.

Song: Destruction (Joywave)

The beginning: "will the soundtrack please produce a sound? (chaos noise) go on, […] any sound! (another chaos noise) well, that's not quite what I had in mind." Error's a little shit and does the exact opposite of anything out of spite (for shits and giggles)

"Oh my God, I'm a giant with an appetite." I relate Error to a black hole, since he eats up AUs like one does to stars.

"Oh my God, there's nobody who can set me right. I've been sent to torch the palace down in broad daylight" he knows everyone thinks he's wrong, and he knows nothing can be done about it. And also the second line "I've been sent" to lose that sense of self and rely on a higher purpose.

"I've been creeping round I saw a little thing I didn't like You tried to hide I've been creeping round I saw a little thing I didn't like You tried to hide from me."

The song also has a very BIG vibe to it, like going somewhere. Walking up to a thing or person with an intent. I think this song could be used to flesh out how much JOY he gets from causing anarchy and destroying things. It gives him a sense of power, makes him feel free and in control, a very sought for feeling we all seek. Group 3.

Song: Get Seduced (The Faint)

Funky noises!

"Tell us! How rad is it living in a microscope? Broadcast into every single living room." I more of related the AUs to the TV shows in the song, it follows their everyday life, "Hot lights on your love life. Let me buy. Close up tabloid shots of your cellulite." I feel like that last line is more sarcasm towards it, "like sure! I'm totally all for your bullshit!"

"You're getting so obsessed its all we talk about." Again, could be used as a reference to Ink.

"Hypnotizing pages of advice From their demented fashion do's or dies." Hypnotizing like Error believes everyone else is being tricked into liking absolute garbage, and if you DON'T like it, you're a bitch!

Song: Digital Silence (Peter McPoland)

"I won't ask a question, I'll state the truth It's everything I know and all I do."

The entire thing is very nihilistic, someone who's downright exhausted from things they feel like need to change but aren't being listened to.

"They're gunna blind date everyone until you love them too." adds onto what I said for Get Seduced, poor Error's the only one who has a brain huh? (What an asshole, really.)

"This is the answer to the question. This is the sound of the truth. This is the answer to the question. There is nothing you can do." He's near unstoppable and unchangeable.

"Digital style, digital hate. Digital god, digital pain. Digital violence, digital world. Digital boy meets digital girl. Digital silence, digital yell. Digital heaven, digital hell. Digital start, digital end. Digital birth, digital death." obviously, being digital makes it so there's a barrier between you and whatever you try to interact with. In reality whatever you do online is ultimately fabricated. Error's a glitch! A digital aspect that can't hurt you outside of the screen, and he's put up barriers and walls around himself and excludes everyone else as "not real", flipping the "nothing online is real" to make himself feel better.

YOU are digital. Not Error. It can't possibly be Error because that's reportedly not what he believes. Group 1 and 2.

Song: The Hunter (Slaves)

I saw the "Are you satisfied?" on the album cover and got reminded of The Origins. Hiii Crunch!

The first half is Error asking what's gunna happen when people get bored of making AUs, all that energy will be completely wasted, what then? Would there be any point in continuing to stray from the original source if the end goal just fizzles out meaninglessly?

"Oh, what is it your justice, cut the hands of the thief? He was starving, his children were crying to be fed. And now they're bawling and dying. But at least you are ahead." getting left behind or entirely forgotten about, that's unfair, Error uses the excuse that nobody would want him to begin with because of what he does, and that's why he deserves to be as unreasonable as he is.

"You keep it, we don't want it." nobody wants trash cluttering up their multiverse! Just get rid of it! He says.

"Just be patient, keep waiting. That's what they always say. But you're tired and you're aching. And the pain won't go away." and his reaction to coping with that pain is to lash out at what he thinks is the cause.

Song: Head Like A Haunted House (Queens Of The Stone Age)

"Desperation can led to madness." Fun line that could be used as an art piece title for him lmao.

"Let you mock and then copulate me. A dirty trick and it's making me sick." explanatory with what I've already established.

"Tonight I'm gonna put up a fight, I'm gonna get a reaction that I'm right. [...] To trick them all because of which is why I'm ashamed. Petty disguises more like skins, a distinction, vice." he feels that everybody's just out to get him, and he feels the need to defend himself. Group 1 and maybe 2.

Again, these lines more or less can speak for themselves.

Song: The Hand That Feeds (Nine Inch Nails)

"Will you bite the hand that feeds you?" Error acting out against the Creators even though they're the ones that spawned him in. Kind of like a rebellious teenager.

"What if this whole crusade's a charade. And behind it all there's a price to be paid. For the blood on which we dine. Justified in the name of the holy and the divine." all the bullshittery of the multiverse and Ink's goal to preserve and spread it (a crusade) holds a horrible end for them all. Maybe things go up in one big explosion GIF and letting all the AUs run free ruins the structure of reality in the long run. Ink's justified in the eyes of the Creators because he upholds their desires.

"So naïve, I keep holding on to what I wanna believe, I can see. But I keep holding on and on and on and on." yeah this puts it in group 1 for sure. Stubborn.

Song: Jealous (Eyedress)

veering away from his outwardly asshole behavior. I don't see Error having great thoughts about himself. Maybe he appears confident and sure of his opinions as a way to cover up that he genuinely doesn't know how to communicate or get help in any way. So he pushes on that higher purpose excuse to avoid possibly getting hurt if he ever does try to reach out.

And if someone tries to get close to him he shoves them away all like.

"You could have anyone you want. Why would you want to be with me? You know, I'm nothing special." everyone already thinks he's a jackass, so why would anyone wanna approach him kindly?

"She tried to call me yesterday. But I didn't pick up. 'Cause I don't got time." he don't got time to get hurt and cry about it, not risking it. :(

finalizing lines to prove my point, "Only care about myself. 'Cause everyone's trying to hurt me. Just leave me alone. Just leave me alone."

Group 2.

Song: Alien Blues (Vundabar)

Friend Crunch suggested this one to me! Thank my buddy.

"Oh no, more surprises, guess it's like this I'd do anything for you, Mrs. Highness." yes he WOULD like someone to be close with (that's the whole point of feeling lonely.)

"The sun is fun, the land is dandy. I only talk to dogs because they don't understand me. My teeth are yellow, hello world. Would you like me a little better if they were white like yours?" him thinking that would he have to change himself to gain someone to talk to. He's off in his own world and goes by his own rules, so obviously, since everyone's against him, the only way to get positive attention would be to not be himself? Character analysis or me projecting. You decide.

"I need to purge my urges. Shame, shame, shame on you."

Shame on you for not having better things to do than read through all of this!

Here's your hard earned prize.

[plothooksinc]

For the fanfic ask, 10, 13, and 41? Love your work by the way!!

Thank you! ♥♥

10. Do you work on multiple wips or stick to one fic at a time?

Okay so currently I am only working on the one fic, but that is largely due to having gone through a huge streak of not writing and my being determined to finish something before my muse ups and dies again. When I started NRFTW I wasn't sure I'd manage to write more than one chapter, but I was going to try, gdit. As it happens, nearly six months later and I'm still writing strong. Which is great! So in my determination to finish at least one fic, I'm going full steam ahead with just this one fic until it's done. (I give it 3-4 chapters at this point.) Usually, however-- back when I was writing regularly, I'd throw a page on a different project each night. I was working on... Snowblind, Zaibatsu Project, and Legacy all at once, while doing random one shots on the side. When I wrote Underdark that was all I wrote, mostly because it ate my brain. So it varies! I'm hoping to finish up NRFTW and then start updating my outstanding fics reasonably evenly-- but if I find I'm starting to flounder again, I may pick just one and stick with it until it's done.

13. Do you listen to music while you write?  If yes, what have you been listening to recently?

I do! I have a cyberpunk-themed playlist for Zaibatsu Project on Spotify, and a TMNT one in general (for all iterations, not just Rise) which is still being built. I also had separate playlists on my computer for individual projects, but due to various computer switches and disk drive problems they're mostly corrupt and unplayable and I've only recreated the cyberpunk one so far.

Both lists are heavily varied in their track lists-- I'm still refining the TMNT one or I'd share it. The Zaibatsu one is here.

41. Who’s your favorite character you’ve written?

I think I answered this on another meme recently! I have a lot of favourites I've written for. So rather than give a full list this time, I will say: I'm having a lot of fun writing Rise!Donnie because his voice and inner monologue are just A+, could write all day. (For your tastes, though, I gotta say: though Bishop isn't my favourite, he's definitely right up there, the amoral jerk. I am... currently writing him right now, so he's fresh in mind.)

Thank you! :D

Questions are here.