#<- I don't actually but for the example...

[nothorses]

do you know why people say trans women and trans men cant both be targets of misogyny? I was told that saying trans men are oppressed by misogyny was bigoted because it implies trans women aren't

imo it mostly comes from a binaristic and cis-centric understanding of gender.

"Oppositional sexism" (coined by Julia Serano) is a handy term here: the idea is that men and women are inherently rigid and mutually exclusive categories of people. Anything one category is, the other cannot be, and vice versa.

Here, oppositional sexism holds that if women are harmed by misogyny, then men benefit from it; women can never benefit from it, and men can never be harmed by it.

A lot of transphobia is rooted in the ways in which trans people fundamentally defy oppositional sexism, and thus endanger the gender binary. Men are supposed to be big, and women are supposed to be small; but trans men assert that men can be small, and trans women assert that women can be big (to use one overly-simplistic example).

A lot of trans people and trans allies still adhere to oppositional sexism, but claim to do it in a "trans-friendly" way: sex can be changed, but gender is instead rigid and mutually exclusive. Or- perhaps more commonly- gender can be expressed in any way, but the ways in which gender is experienced are instead rigid and mutually exclusive.

Which is how we arrive at this insistence that trans people fall into one binary gender experience, even if they don't actually identify as a particular "binary" gender. "Trans women are women" might mean trans women can look and act any way at all, but it also means they experience womanhood in the same way that all other women do, and that experience is rigid and mutually exclusive of "man" experiences.

It's also why so many people are so eager to create new "inclusive" ways of sorting trans people into the same gender binary using increasingly contrived language: People insist on knowing the gender someone was assigned at birth so they can categorize them as AFAB or AMAB, and thus conclude what gender experience they have: man or woman. People insist on categorizing nonbinary people as either transmasc or transfem so they can conclude what gender experience they have: man or woman. People insist on categorizing trans people as either TMA or TME so they can conclude what gender experience they have: man or woman.

The idea that trans men experience misogyny only implies that trans women don't if you believe that man and woman are rigid, mutually-exclusive categories.

[tossawary]

One piece of acting advice that has stayed with me for years in regards to both writing and drawing as well is: "Don't use the body to act what the character is saying. Act what the character is THINKING."

Like, as a very, very basic example: a character is apologizing by saying, "I'm sorry." But that line is going to look and sound different depending on what the character is thinking. Crossed arms and a sullen tone can mean that a character is actually thinking: "I don't mean it and also I hate you." A pleading tone and reaching out to take the other character's arm can mean: "Please don't leave me." A tired voice and slumped shoulders within context could mean: "I did what I had to do."

This is one way to begin to do "Show, Don't Tell" in storytelling. It is trusting your audience to see the depth and to catch on to the things you leave unsaid. It's fun to let the audience be observant and clever. It is also reflective of real life, where people are often scared of being vulnerable, or don't necessarily even understand their own emotions, or can't articulate their own thoughts, or have difficulty identifying the true feelings of the people around them, and so don't say very much.

There are exceptions to this advice, of course. In writing especially, rather than in a visual medium, some POV characters are very good at reading emotions from body language and others are not, and their observations in the narration may reflect this skill. Some characters will assume everyone around them is always angry with them or simply not pay attention to other people's moods at all, personalities which can also be subtly communicated to the audience and later used in the story in some interesting way.

Some characters have excellent control over their body language and tone of voice, because they are on-guard, highly trained in some fashion, or a very good liar. They will not easily communicate their true thoughts through their body language or their actions. Their lie can be so good that it can be slipped past the audience as nothing important to the plot until it comes back to bite. Their oddly perfect control over their body in a tense situation can instead maybe be used to indicate to the POV character and/or the audience: "Oh, there's something WRONG with this person."

Body language will also change by culture and class and so on. This clash can cause communication problems between characters, as a character's affectionate pat on the shoulder of another might be intended as casual comfort, but be received as overly intimate condescension. Different cultures / people can even have very different opinions on what level of eye contact and overlapping speech is rude.

This advice was originally given to me in the context of illustration and animation, in which it is very common for inexperienced artists to act out the words that the character is saying in mime-like gesture. In media for young children, we might choose to keep things very simple, as toddlers struggle to learn what it looks like and feels like to be angry or happy. But past that? People don't actually behave this way. What we say and what we really mean are not always synchronized, and we can use the body to communicate this.

[yaknowlikenyah]

This is a conversation that will make some of you reactive, but it's something you need to sit with.

You all need to make peace with paraphiles. You don't need to like them, you don't need to agree with them and you can think it's disgusting, but you need to make peace with them.

You need to learn to separate fantasy from action and reality, and you need to realize that to fantasize about something is not a desire to physically commit an act. You need fantasy to safely explore what causes your paraphilia. You need fantasy to deconstruct it down to its basest elements to find healthy outlets.

Even then, fantasy can be fun. It can be fun to explore things you would never do, and it's not morally wrong to make silly posts about fucked up things. If it makes you uncomfortable to see people having fun with their desires, you need to learn to walk away. Both to protect yourself and to protect the other person from your gut reactions.

You'll notice I didn't give any examples in this post, and that's because I don't want to have any comments of "Actually OP just has pedophilia/beastiality/necrophilia/whatever" Because that's not the point. The point is that you need to recognize the desire of paraphila as something harmless without direct action.

The "But what about the children" argument means absolutely nothing when people are going out of the way to carve out their own adult only spaces to avoid children. Who are you protecting when you invade those spaces.

[theosbaby]

brokenhearted

theodore nott x fem!reader

masterlist

summary; theo breaks up with his girlfriend and you comfort him, but things get a little bit heated in the process.

warnings; a bit of angst, heavy make out (this shit is long af), NSFW, some light dirty talk, praising, dry humping, p in v, marking, hair pulling, unprotected sex... that's all, i think. this is kinda a fluffy smut.

author's note; i'm back!! i'm sorry for disappearing for such a long time, i hope this makes up for it ♡ (i don't really like how it turned out, but i hope you do). ps: thank you all so much for still supporting my acc while i was gone! i appreciate it so much.

you had been looking for theodore for some time now; the night had fallen already, and you hadn't heard from him since the day before; he didn't go to class, neither contact you in any way. preoccupied, you headed over the astronomy tower again; you had already looked for him there —like four times during the day— but you decided to try again, after all, it was his favourite place in the entire castle. that time, you actually found him there, sitting with his back against the railings and a cigarette between his lips... classic theo.

when he noticed your presence, he looked up at you and bluntly said, "luna broke up with me." his expression was almost emotionless, but you knew him well enough to know he was hurting deep down.

"what?" you gasped, your brow furrowed, as you walked slowly to take a seat by his side on the floor.

you didn't know what to say or how to act; his admission had taken you by surprise. one part of you —the part of you that was crazy in love him— wanted to scream and cry happy tears at the news, but the other part empathised with him, making you feel his pain.

you hated seeing him suffer.

"yeah, she said it wasn't working out," theo replied.

he took one last drag from his cigarette before blowing out the smoke and tossing it aside as he looked up at the stars, his eyes distant and lost in thought. you kept quiet, not wanting to interrupt him so he could let it all out.

"i guess she's right, though. we never really had anything in common." he chuckled bitterly, shaking his head before talking again, "i don't know why i'm surprised, though. i'm not the most lovable person, am i?"

his eyes met yours, and you could see the pain in them. he was your best friend; you knew damn well the baggage he carried on his shoulders, the trauma his mother's death and his father's neglect had caused on him. theo was not one to get attached to people because of that and every time he lost someone, grief hit him like a truck, even if he didn't let it show. you reached to grab his large hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"hey, that's not true," you told him, your voice softening to try and reassure him, "don't say that."

theo gave you a small smile, his eyes searching yours to try and find comfort in them. he took a deep breath and let it out slowly as his hand squeezed yours back. you could feel the tension emanating from his body, the pain he was trying to hide. then he looked away again, blue eyes dropping to the floor.

"i just... i don't know how to do relationships, you know? i never had any good examples growing up." his voice was quiet as he talked, almost a whisper, like he was telling you his darkest secret and feared someone else could hear him. "my dad... he never loved my mom. he never loved me. and now i feel like i don't know how to be loved, or how to love someone else," he explained, letting out a sigh, his brow furrowed. "i'm sorry. i didn't mean to bring this up..."

"theo..." you muttered, your voice cracking as you cupped his face to force him to look at you, "that's bullshit, alright? listen to me." you stared at him intently as you spoke, gently caressing his cheek, "you're nothing like your father."

theo's eyes remained locked on yours, his gaze searching for any sign of truth in your words. you swore that you saw his eyes fill with tears as he heard you talk, but he quickly blinked them away, not wanting to cry in front of you; crying made him feel vulnerable.

"i needed to hear that," he muttered, leaning into your touch, "thanks."

"want a hug?" you asked, smiling warmly at him.

you both stayed quiet for a few seconds, just staring at each other with an intensity that spoke volumes, and you were so close together that you could see the little freckles that covered his cheeks and nose, painting his skin like constellations painted the starry night sky.

"please," he responded.

you felt him wrapping his strong arms around your slim body and you melted into his embrace, your body heat mingling with his as you felt the tension leaving his muscles. one of your hands rested on his back, rubbing reassuring patterns on in, while the other caressed his soft waves and he sighed contently.

"you always know how to make me feel better," he murmured while pulling away slowly, his eyes filled with gratitude and a faint smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

your eyes dropped to his lips unconsciously, your pulse racing; he noticed your stare and smirked.

"of course," you whispered back, "that's what friends are for."

you wished you could be more than friends, though.

theo watched you as you averted your gaze shyly and he couldn't help but notice how beautiful you looked with the moonlight kissing your pretty face.

"you know," he said quietly, "i've always had this strange feeling about us."

"what feeling?" you asked curiously, chuckling; your cheeks flushed as you looked back at him.

theo took a deep breath before answering, "like we're meant to be together... like i was supposed to meet you and spend my whole life with you." his voice was slightly shaky, as if he was nervous about something.

he looked at you intently, waiting for your reaction.

"well, you ain't getting rid of me anytime soon, so yeah, i guess we're stuck together." you laughed, not understanding what he really meant; you thought he was talking about your friendship.

theo chuckled at your response nervously, shaking his head lightly when he realised you hadn't noticed he was actually trying to confess his feelings; he had always liked you, even though he was dating other girl, he always knew it was you who owned his heart. maybe that was why he couldn't just give luna all the love she deserved.

"i mean... as more than friends," he admitted.

he looked at you intently, searching for a reaction from your part that let him know you felt the same way. his heart was pounding in his chest; that was a big step for him to take.

you couldn't help but smile, anxiously biting your lower lip as you dropped your gaze to the ground.

"your mom used to say that we were going to end up together someday," you whispered with longing.

your smile turned into a sad one as you mentioned her; you knew theo missed her a lot, and to be honest, you missed her too. you turned towards him just to see that he was smiling back at you, but his smile didn't really reach his eyes.

"she always knew what was best for me. i miss her so much." he sighed deeply and tilted his head, resting it against yours. "i only wish she was here."

"she would be so proud of you," you told him, trying to make him feel better.

theo nodded, his voice barely above a whisper as he said, "i really hope so."

he looked at you again and smiled warmly. the air felt intimate and special between the two of you; it was like nothing else mattered but this moment together. and you both knew, you were in love.

"i missed this," you murmured, your eyes dropping to his lips briefly once again.

that time, theo's gaze fell to your lips as well, and you felt your heart pounding in your chest. when theo started dating luna, that intimate conversations with him started getting less frequent, making you drift apart slightly and it had made you realise how much you actually needed him in your life.

"i missed it too," he whispered back, "i missed you."

after a moment of silence, he leaned forward, his lips brushing against yours in a soft, tentative kiss. It caught you off guard, but you returned the kiss, feeling like your soul was about to leave your body as his soft lips caressed yours in such an intimate touch.

but then reality crashed you; you couldn't do it, not when he had just broken up with his girlfriend and he was feeling down, so you put your hand on his chest, reluctantly pulling him away to stop him from kissing you.

"we shouldn't do this..." you shook your head; your faces were so close together that your warm breath hit his face. "you and luna..."

"please," he interrupted you, his voice almost pleading, "make me forget."

"theo, i–" you stuttered.

you were fighting an inner war with yourself; you had been dreaming about that moment for so long, but it didn't felt right to take advantage of the situation like that. you couldn't bear it if he regretted this decision the day after.

he shook his head, as if he could read your mind just looking into your eyes, and cupped your face gently, pulling you closer to him.

"you're everything that's right in my life, sunshine. you're all i need..." he murmured, his voice low and desperate. "you've always been."

your heart melted when you heard him calling you "sunshine". that was the nickname he had given you when you first started being friends; when you asked him why he called you that, he told you that he had picked it because you were the light to his darkness, the only thing that made him truly happy.

you knew theo would never hurt you, that he would prefer to die rather than making you suffer in any way, so any doubt lingering in your mind slowly faded away.

"i'm sorry i didn't have the courage to tell you sooner," he added, his gaze piercing through yours with an intensity that spoke volumes.

"it's better late than never, right?" you whispered, gulping nervously.

you could feel your heart beating in your throat as you stared at him, waiting for him to make a move.

he smirked. "i guess we'll have to make up for the lost time."

and with that, he leaned forward, pressing his lips to yours once more. it was a tender, gentle kiss that started slowly but gradually intensified as his hand slid down towards the small of your back, pressing you closer to his body. time seemed to stand still as you lost yourself in the warmth and comfort of his embrace. you were on cloud nine; lips avidly kissing his and skin prickling wherever he touched you, igniting sparks in your belly. you parted your lips, allowing him to slip his tongue inside your mouth, and you exhaled a sharp breath, whimpering against his lips.

he deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring your mouth with a hunger that mirrored your own. his other hand found its way to your neck, holding you firmly as he continued to devour you with every ounce of passion he possessed. after a few seconds, though, you had to pull away reluctantly to be able to breathe, your chest heaving up and down as you reached up to tangle your fingers in his soft hair, gently caressing it.

he smirked and rested his forehead against yours, his breath hot against your skin. "you're a very good kisser," he murmured, his fingers still running up and down back, leaving a trail of heat in their wake.

he was looking at you with an intensity that made your head spin, your cheeks blushing at the compliment as you smiled back at him.

"you too," you whispered against his lips, unable to resist the urge of leaning in to kiss him once again.

his mouth tasted like mints and cigarettes; it was new, but at the same time, it felt familiar.

you heard him chuckling softly before he returned the kiss, this time slowing things down, as if he wanted to savour every moment he had with you. his hands wandered over your body, memorizing every curve and dip, his touch setting your body on fire. eventually, his fingers found the hem of your shirt, slowly creeping underneath and causing goosebumps to break out on your skin.

your plump lips parted, a shaky breath slipping past them as you felt him caressing your soft flesh ever so delicately, as if he was afraid of breaking you. he took this as an invitation to slide his tongue inside your mouth once again, avidly searching for yours and starting a playful war between the both of you.

you felt his lips forming a smirk against yours, his tongue having apparently won the little play fight it had with yours as he took full control of the kiss. his hand moved down your back, caressing your skin before he gently cupped your ass, squeezing it lightly, which earned him a soft gasp from you. you didn't oppose when he gently pulled at you to bring you closer to his body, making you straddle his lap as he leaned back against the railings.

he finally broke the kiss, letting out a low groan as you settled on top of him. his eyes were dark, and he looked up at you like he wanted to eat you alive. his hands moved to grip your creamy thighs, fingers digging into your skin possessively. you were panting at that point, cheeks flushed and lips swollen from all the kissing, but his breathing was just as ragged as yours, and his heart was beating so fast that he was sure you could hear it if you paid just enough attention to it.

"you're absolutely breathtaking, you know that?" he murmured, pressing a soft kiss to your lips.

you blushed in response, the smile that appeared in your face impossible to hold in. your small hands cupped his face tenderly, and your thumbs caressed his sharp cheekbones.

"don't say things like that," you muttered, getting all flustered and shy suddenly.

his lips twitched in a amused smile at your reaction, but before he could even say or do anything, your lips was on his again and the feeling was so intense it robbed him of his breath for a moment there.

"i want you so bad," he whispered against your lips, hips bucking up to grind against you unconsciously.

and that's when you felt it. he was hard. the mere discovery had you moaning softly into the kiss, hips grinding down onto his crotch in a desperate attempt to feel him once more as you placed your hands on his chest. good lord, the friction was making his head swim. he groaned in response as he slid his hands up your thighs to grasp at your hips, the need to fuck you coursing through him like a wildfire.

"you're killing me here, sunshine," he muttered, breaking the kiss for a moment before swooping back in for another.

you giggled playfully against his mouth, hips still rocking onto the straining erection in his pants. you weren't thinking straight anymore, your need for him clouding all your rational thoughts; theo was the only thing in your mind in that moment. the feeling was mutual. theo's mind was consumed with wanting you, his hands moving to your ass to encourage your movements, eliciting a whimper from somewhere deep in your throat that sent his head spiralling.

okay, so keeping a semblance of his cool was completely out of the window now.

pulling your lips apart with a loud snap, he growled something that sounded like, "you're a fucking dream."

you responded with a harsh tug at his brown curls, tilting his head back to expose the pale expanse of his neck. you attached your mouth to it greedily, kissing and sucking on his skin as you ground against him, which caused him to literally whimper as he shuddered beneath you.

for god's sake, he did sound pretty whimpering.

meanwhile, you felt one adventurous hand slipping underneath your top and sliding up your belly. theo's hand was on a mission, his fingers tracing along your silky skin before he cupped one of your breasts, gasping at the feel of its weight on his palm. he kneaded it, his other hand reaching up to grip the hem of your shirt while he pushed you away from his neck. he looked up at you, silently asking for permission to undress you.

"it's okay," you whimpered in response, nodding with a little smile on your puffy, red lips.

you knew you were in the middle of the astronomy tower, a public place, but you just couldn't bring yourself to care about it. theo didn't need more encouragement than that, he was already tugging your top over your head, tossing it aside before his eyes feasted on the sight of your naked breasts; his gaze was hungry, devouring every inch of your exposed skin.

"you're so fucking beautiful," he whispered, leaning forward to take one of your nipples into his mouth while his hand pinched and rubbed the other.

"theo," you whined as his tongue flicked your sensitive nub.

your hips resumed their previous movements as you fisted his hair once again; your heart pounded in your chest when you felt his hard cock pressing against your aching pussy, both of your clothes getting in the way as your need grew stronger.

fuck, you were so wet.

his breath was hitching from the friction between your hips, and he tore his lips away from your boob with a desperate moan, his lids falling close, a sheen of sweat already glistening on his brow.

"god damn, fuck me already, would you?"

you couldn't help but chuckle at his desperate plea, leaning forward to kiss his lips once more; it was like you couldn't get enough from him.

you broke the contact after a few seconds, your teeth sinking into his bottom lip to tug at it playfully, then, you asked him, "here?"

his eyes flickered around the tower, barely sparing it a glance before his hungry gaze settled back on you. theo's mind was clouded, his cock aching and his fingers already tugging idly at his zipper.

"the hell if i care..." he mumbled, voice raspy from all the kissing.

you helped him get rid of his clothes, lowering his pants and boxers just enough to free his dick, which sprang against his stomach, long and thick; your mouth watered and now you were eager to have him inside you.

how could a cock be that perfect? not fair.

"fuck, come here."

before you could even process what was happening, you felt his hands gripping the hem of your shorts to tug them down your thighs alongside your panties. you slipped just one leg out of them before he pulled you towards him desperately.

you were completely naked, while he was almost fully dressed, and it was unfair, so you forced him to lift his arms up so you could yank his t-shirt off, exposing his ripped abs. thank you, quidditch.

he pulled you flush against him, skin to skin for the first time today and you both moaned; his hands gripped your hips tightly, fingertips tracing over your bare flesh as he guided you on top of his cock.

"gonna fuck you now, sunshine, you want that?" he asked for your consent, lips peppering kisses all over your collarbone and chest.

"yeah," you mumbled in response, nodding eagerly.

you reached down to wrap your small hand around the base of his shaft, placing the tip against your soaked entrance and lowering yourself onto it. since you both were a little too impatient to do any foreplay, his thick cock sliding inside your tight pussy knocked the air out of your lungs.

theo watched your face, lips parted and panting as you slowly took him inside yourself: he gave a low moan when his cock bottomed out inside you, hands gripping you tightly.

"fuck– baby, so fucking good," he complimented you, whimpering needily.

you stood still for a few moments to get used to his size before you started bouncing up and down on his dick, the delicious drag of his thick cock head against your inner walls making you shiver from pleasure. you gripped his shoulders to try and steady yourself, nails digging into his flesh and leaving bright red marks.

theo grunted, tossing his head back as he felt your walls clutching him. his eyes closed in ecstasy, hands travelling down to grip your ass cheeks and helping you bounce up and down on him a little bit faster.

"shit, baby... so fucking tight," he growled out.

"your cock feels so good," you cried out while dragging your nails down his chest and abs, scratching his skin.

theo hissed as he felt your nails clawing at him. his hands squeezed your ass tighter before he smacked it, groaning. "bad girl... don't scratch."

the slap made you yelp slightly, cheeks flushing red at his words. "wanna mark you up," you confessed, breathlessly, "so everyone knows you're mine."

you stopped bouncing as you felt your legs getting tired, rocking your hips back and forward instead; the new motion made your clit rub against his pelvis, sending pleasure waves down your spine.

theo chuckled, his eyes smouldering. "i am yours, sunshine. always have been."

his hands kept roaming your body, taking in the softness of your skin as he lifted you up just enough to be able to thrust up into you, hard and fast. you grasped at the railings behind him for support, crying out in complete and utter ecstasy as he railed you, hips snapping against yours and creating a wet slapping sound that mingled with your loud moans. your pussy clenched around him, and you felt your belly muscles tightening, signaling your upcoming orgasm. theo's thrusting became more erratic, his breath hitching as he pounded into you, chasing his own release. he grabbed your hair and yanked it back, exposing your neck to him. he leaned in and bit down on the sensitive skin where your shoulder met your neck.

"gonna cum for me like a good girl?" he purred, panting.

"yes, please," you answered between little moans and cries, your voice whiny and agitated.

your eyes rolled back when his hand slid between your legs and his thumb grazed your clit; you trembled in response. it didn't take long for you to reach your peak and when you did, it was with a loud cry.

"that's it, that's my good girl," he cooed at you, fucking you through your climax.

your cunt spasmed around his cock as you came, your juices soaking his shaft. your arms wrapped around his body while you squirmed uncontrollably on top of him, moaning repeatedly in his ear. theo wasn't far behind you, the feeling of your walls clenching around him sending him over the edge. he buried himself deep inside you, whimpering helplessly as he came in your cunt.

you moaned when you felt his hot cum filling you up, pussy still tingling so nicely that you weren't even thinking. "fuck– i love you... i love you so fucking much." it just slipped in the heat of the moment without you realising.

but of course he noticed.

theo's breath caught, his orgasm still rocking through him. he looked at you with a surprised expression, but it quickly melted into a tender smile, a warm sensation flooding his chest.

"i love you too, sunshine."

[gay-otlc]

This is a take I've seen fairly often- that trans men & mascs only think they experience transandrophobia because they refuse to accept that what they're experiencing is misogyny.

It's also a completely ridiculous take. The fact that trans men/mascs are targeted by misogyny is a fundamental part of transandrophobia theory. Trans men/mascs, and others who regularly discuss transandrophobia, emphasize over and over again the ways in which trans men/mascs experience misogyny. For example, the idea that they are women and therefore are too stupid and brainwashed to be trusted about their genders, or the sense of entitlement to trans men/mascs' bodies (how dare you ruin your perfect breasts, how dare you transition in a way that makes you unable to carry children, how dare you not be the beautiful woman i want you to be).

In fact, the people who deny that trans men/mascs experience misogyny tend to be the same people who argue against the concept of transandrophobia. They insist that trans men receive male privilege, and in fact actually benefit from misogyny rather than suffer from it.

When trans men/mascs point the ways that they are affected by misogyny, they are accused of spreading TERF rhetoric (as though acknowledging the ways in which people who were assigned female at birth are oppressed automatically means you believe in "sex consciousness" and "afab unity" against anyone assigned male at birth"), or accused of implying that trans women aren't affected by misogyny (they absolutely are, the belief that trans men and women can't both be affected by misogyny stems from oppositional sexism)

All this to say: The people who talk about transandrophobia are well aware that trans men/mascs suffer from misogyny, and aren't denying this out of dysphoria or internalized misogyny- they aren't denying this at all. The people who deny that trans men/mascs suffer from misogyny are the people who believe transandrophobia doesn't exist.

And, transandrophobia isn't "just misogyny." Misogyny is a crucial component of transandrophobia- again, no one who talkes about transandrophobia is denying this- but not the only component.

Trans men/mascs being denied access to gynecological healthcare (that cis women are able to access) because they appear to be men, or have their gender legally changed to male isn't "just misogyny."

Trans men/mascs to losing their friends, support, and abuse and mental health resources when they come out and transition, or reach a point of being "too masculine," isn't "just misogyny".

The belief that going on testosterone will make trans men/mascs dangerous and violent, and the negative rhetoric about bottom surgery, isn't "just misogyny."

Being called a gender traitor and accused siding with the enemy and only transitioning to gain male privilege isn't "just misogyny."

Trans men/mascs being impregnated specifically as a method of forcing them to detransition isn't "just misogyny."

Choosing to use a women's bathroom (either due to safety concerns or transphobic laws) and being kicked out or assaulted for looking male isn't "just misogyny."

Trans men/mascs getting violently attacked because "if you want to be a man so bad, I'll beat you up like one" isn't "just misogyny."

People who talk about transandrophobia very much recognize that trans men/mascs experience misogyny (and are trying to get people who deny transandrophobia to recognize this as well), and there are aspects of transandrophobia that go beyond "just misogyny." Neither of these things contradict each other. In conclusion, "'transandrophobia' is just misogyny but transmascs don't want to admit it" is completely false all around, so I wish it wasn't such a commonly held belief.

[thankskenpenders]

After a recent interview where Iizuka said it was possible for IDW characters to show up in the games, I've seen some discussion about how the characters need to be introduced "the right way" for people who don't read the comics. And, like, this is obviously true to some extent. You want to convey why people unfamiliar with them should care about these characters, instead of just assuming everyone already knows who they are and their whole backstories and everything. (Anyone who's watched Disney+ Star Wars already has some easy examples of times where they were like "you guys already know this character from the cartoons, right?" and casual fans were completely lost.) But I think people are overestimating how much work this would actually take, especially people who argue that the characters need full-blown reintroductions in the games that depict their backstories all over again and treat them as characters Sonic doesn't already know

I think it's easy to forget that not everyone who plays Sonic games has played every Sonic game. Kids especially. Every single major recurring character in the games debuted before today's generation of Sonic kids was born, and as such every new game is someone's introduction to those characters. The games with the introductions for the Chaotix, Blaze, Silver, Omega, Cream, the Babylon Rogues, Fang, Mighty, Ray, etc. are straight up not available at all on modern hardware without resorting to emulation. To many people picking up Team Sonic Racing or Mania or whatever, those characters are already some random characters Sonic apparently already knows from some previous story. These are not things that every single person who picks up a new Sonic game is intimately familiar with. And yet the games don't feel the need to stop and recount their entire backstories every time they appear.

Also, like, even if you have played every single game, Sonic already has a long history of introducing new characters with little to no fanfare, often treating them as characters Sonic has already met. Core characters like Tails, Amy, and Metal Sonic were really just dropped into Genesis era sequels with no explanation for people who didn't read the manual (i.e.: most players). Sonic has a kid sidekick and a girl who has a crush on him and a robot duplicate now, just roll with it. The modern era would continue to do this with characters like the reimagined Team Chaotix, or Orbot and Cubot, who just appeared in the games one day with no setup. We got along just fine.

(This is to say nothing of the nature of the creative medium the IDW characters originate from, where every new comic arc is treated as somebody's first and supporting characters are periodically given reintroductions to get newer readers up to speed. We've been over Whisper's backstory multiple times now.)

Again, obviously I do want characters like Tangle, Whisper, and Surge to show up in the games with compelling introductions that do the characters justice, but I think people are overthinking how much effort that actually takes. You do not need a whole elaborate adaptation of Whisper and Surge's backstories in the games just for them to have a cameo. You can have Sonic already know them, and if the details are even relevant you can convey that stuff in other ways - brief exposition in the dialogue, context clues, in-game character bios, new stories that showcase their important character traits without 1:1 recreating the stories that have already been told, out-of-game promotional videos and animated shorts like the ones they did to get people up to speed on who the hell Fang is, etc. This is pretty basic stuff when writing for a long-running multimedia franchise.

[akanemnon]

Hiya ^^

So I kinda noticed for a while now that Chara doesn't use contractions in their words (I'm vs I am), and it just makes me think if they've been raised to speek formally all the time. Or was it just not a thing when they were alive?

the actual question:

How do you imagine Chara's voice? Cause I just have a headcanon one that I do all the time while reading their lines XD

(not up to date pic, but the examples are everywhere anyways)

Yep, that is very intentional. They mirror Toriel's way of speaking, since she also tends to avoid contractions. But Chara does so to a much stronger degree. It is supposed to convey that they came from a very strict place, where they had to watch how they address their elders and other people.

I don'thave a headcanon voice for them however. In general I don't really think about voice actors for these characters, like other people might do. I just go by overal vibes and what kinda speech patterns they might have. Though I DO have a very specific voice and speech pattern in mind for one character later on...

[mochinomnoms]

I used to do martial arts a lot and would pick up little bruises and dings from sparring with classmates that just missed my protective gear. So, my thought: We all agree the Octa-Boys are territorial and their S/O being feisty or scrappy would be a huge appeal point for them if not downright necessary. So how do they react when said S/O is marked up from their participation in an athletic club? (Aka, from playfighting someone other than them)

Love you mochi!

I love you!!! Smoochies for u mwah!

I personally think that the twins are the ones who enjoy playfighting more than Azul, since they're predators. i actually have a whole different set of headcanons for octopans/cecaelias' courting methods!

But for the twins, I think it would depend on if they know you do martial arts, and I imagine they would. I think Floyd is the most fascinated by it, and you might find yourself with a new sparring partner, cause you bet he's going to learn martial arts, he already knows self-defense! Jade is more like your cheerleader, he loves watching you throw down with others, it's hot lol. He probably won't participate, but he is fascinated with the different forms of martial arts that humans came up with.

They'd also be aware that bruises come with the territory, so I don't imagine them being jealous about it. Another important aspect of being a mate in the sea is being attentive and caring for them when hurt. This shows in different ways with both of them, Floyd finds the idea of martial arts and being able to fight with people without getting in trouble great! Plus, as seen in his Beanfest vignette, when finds that someone is better at something than him, he gets a huge burst of motivation to be better. He sees that others have the ability to be stronger, more flexible, more knowledgeable and wants to be the best he can be cause he knows he can. And also, he gets to spend time with his favorite person, so that's a bonus.

Jade is going to show this by caring for you after. Helping you ice and massage sore muscles, bringing you snacks filled with carbs for after sparing, and is a happy spectator! He loves that you can kick ass, you're just so lovely and wonderful, and he's so in love and also maybe rough him up a lil bit too pwetty pweeease.

Another thing to consider is that the same type of affection can mean different things in different context! For example, kisses between lovers, family, and friends are all different and mean different things! Same for hugs, cuddling, and other forms of affection. Playfighting for them is one of those things, though like kisses are for us, it tends to be seen as a thing for lovers.

[babycharmander]

PSA for TF2 Fanartists

(And... really for everyone on the creative side of the fandom, but artists are the ones hurt by this the most.)

I've been seeing some really concerning stuff here that is going unnoticed. Granted, I don't think this is any artist's fault--if anything, the artists are the victims here. But that's why I want to make you guys aware of this, so you can protect yourself from this sort of thing.

"This sort of thing" being a little something called fetish mining.

Fetish mining is when someone with a specific fetish attempts to trick someone else into providing them with content for their fetish... without letting them know that's what they're asking for. Outside of fandom spaces, this can look like someone with a foot fetish approaching someone who is selling socks, and asking them to "model" the socks for them--they're not actually interested in buying the socks, they just want to see pictures of feet.

Within fandom spaces, however, they often take the form of someone repeatedly requesting something featuring a very specific body part of a character, or repeatedly requesting art of a character performing a weirdly specific action. (The repeated part is important here--someone could just say "oh hey could you draw this character shirtless?" once, and that would probably be fine. There's a chance it could be a fetish thing, sure, but it's significantly less likely. Same with a really random request--someone could request something really specific, but if they only do so once, it's significantly less likely to be a fetish mining request.) They might also provide an excuse like, "oh, I think this would be really funny! :)" or "this is a joke request! but it would be hilarious if you drew it"

So what are some examples of this?

Well... they might look a little something like this:

[ID: Two screenshots of two different anonymous asks. The first one reads "HEAVY TF2 TUMMY" with multiple red exclamation points afterward, and the second reads "Sniper tf2 teeth" followed by multiple red exclamation points. /end ID]

(I was going to feature another but then realized it wasn't anonymous, and I'm not comfortable putting an actual blog on blast.)

If these were just one-off asks, that would be one thing, but if you look up these things, you'll see dozens of these asks.

As well, there's nothing wrong with drawing Heavy shirtless, or drawing Sniper baring his teeth. Having fetishes for stomachs or teeth is not wrong, either, nor is specifically requesting fetish art (so long as the artist is okay with such requests)!

The problem is that the specificness of these asks, combined with how frequently these asks get sent, are signs of fetish mining.

(Though another problem is that... this isn't always a 100%-for-sure sign of fetish mining. Some people have special interests that might not be a typical thing like a fandom or hobby or branch of science, but could just be something oddly specific like stomachs or teeth. These things are okay and are not bad! But requests relating to these things can, unfortunately, look identical to fetish mining.)

And again, fetish mining is a person sneakily asking for someone else to provide them with something that is fetish material for them--something that is sexual for them--without letting that person know that's what it's for.

This makes it a form of sexual harassment.

I feel like a lot of the fandom is... not really aware of what's going on, here, and it's distressing. These are very likely bad actors trying to take advantage of people and get away with sexually harassing others (including minors). This is not okay. No part of that is okay.

The best thing to do when faced with a request that seems oddly specific is to look it up, and, if there seem to be multiple requests of this nature, to ignore it--do not fulfill the request. Do not encourage this behavior. (Unless you're okay with drawing that kind of content, but like... if that's the case, then tag your work appropriately.)

Don't feel bad if you've fulfilled some of these requests in the past--you didn't know, and being tricked is not your fault. But now that you do know, you can hopefully better protect yourself from this kind of thing.

[howtofightwrite]

i feel like, when it comes to people trying to use violence to knock people out - rather than avoiding methods that could cause permanent injury entirely, the previous anon(s) could just go for it while acknowledging the potential consequences in-writing?

so we can say that maybe, a kidnapper knocks another person out via head injury, and the KIDNAPPER doesn't care; but when the person is rescued the rescuers are worried for them because 'what do you mean you were hit in the head?!' and immediately checked for a concussion.

one could also have it so that the person doesn't know what head trauma or other bodily harm can cause and be appropriately horrified if/when they learn - or, if it's a character who uh. doesn't care for their body or health as much, they could hear this and refuse to care. follow what the character would do on that

they don't even need to actually have the person get a permanent injury. there can be a hospital scene or first-aid responder scene where they check the victim's head and go 'you are very. VERY lucky to not have a permanent brain injury from this', and insist on them to keep monitoring for any future symptoms.

there's a lot of other ways to go about knocking someone out, but iirc this will also apply to other methods of forced unconsciousness, like sleeping pills, sleeping gas or chloroform. in real life, it's always going to risk extra consequences because it involves forcing someone's bodily functions to shut down, if temporarily

and that shouldn't stop them from writing anyway, since fiction is often going to stretch the realm of belief a little with improbable situations, y'know? a lot of stories already take liberties with it. but it's both admirable and a good thing when someone wants to be more faithful to reality, regardless, so that's why i'd like to give my own thoughts.

if the person trying to find a non-lethal angle to knocking someone out is really worried, they could just make a disclaimer saying 'unrealistic depictions of violence/recovery' or 'creative liberties taken with the consequences of bodily harm' at the start of the story and go with their previous plans

but it's perfectly fine to just write as is while acknowledging the situation in-story too, is what i feel. or even have the character actually suffer the consequences. that angle is always interesting when explored.

timeskips are also a way to cheat on the recovery period, if you want it to be really realistic. imagine this scenario; a person gets knocked unconscious during a kidnapping. they wake up and manage to escape with a concussion - but they still have the concussion from the initial assault, along with other injuries during the hostage period. they are promptly hospitalised.

timeskip to several months after. the person has recovered! (or mostly recovered, depending).

a new kidnapper enters the scene! but they don't want the victim to actually be hurt, and the waiting period was hell, so they either just get their bouncer to grab them with no chance for reprieve, nab them while asleep, or threaten them via gun to head/consequences for someone else/etc to get in the car. no actual knocking out forcefully, only unconsciousness is falling asleep in the car.

consequences make for an interesting narrative too, is what i'm trying to say; and there's no need to shy away from it, but rather acknowledge that reality as fact.

I normally wouldn't light up an ask like this, but it is doing a lot of mental gymnastics to try to skirt around the central problems with violence.

So, let's start at the top: Acknowledging a problematic behavior as problematic can still result in the author endorsing that behavior, if they present the specific examples of that behavior in a positive light. If you're having characters casually knocking people out, you are endorsing inflicting extremely hazardous, and potentially life-altering injuries onto people, “but, it's okay, because I didn't kill them.”

The problem comes from an author wanting their upbeat, happy-go-lucky protagonist to also be an absolute bad ass, without interrogating the ethical issues inherent to their “heroic activities.” Worse, in many cases, they want their character to be perceived as a good person, regardless of the horrors they inflict on their fellow human beings.

The last time I covered this, I took a passing swipe at Batman, but it remains a relevant factor to consider about a lot of action hero characters. He engages in absolutely disproportionate violence against people who are engaging in criminal activity because socioeconomic factors that are beyond their control.

A lot of fictional violence gets framed in contexts where the nobility of the protagonist is preserved either because, “they don't kill people,” or, they specifically limit their violence to groups that are “socially acceptable,” targets.

In fact, you can even see an example of the latter in the listing above, with the express targeting of, “kidnappers.” Now, I have no love for human traffickers, but seriously consider for a second that this specific, highly-specialized, career path was called out as the group to engage in this behavior. I'm sorry, “why?” What is it about a kidnapper that makes them more likely to be willing to inflict harm on their victim than some other group? But, that's not the point. The point is so that when your protagonist does truly horrible things to those kidnappers, they're still “a good person,” at the end of the day. (There's also a little goofiness about kidnappers in the ask, because they care more about the physical health of their victim than most criminals would. Think about it this way, a mugger wants your wallet, and you're just an incidental obstetrical between you and their target, for a kidnapper, you are the wallet. They want their victim reasonably intact. Whether that is for a later sale, or for a ransom, they don't get paid if their victim is “non-functional.”)

Actually, a really messed up example of this, on this blog, was a few years back, when someone was asking about their “vigilante” characters gunning down drug addicts. Which, yeah, that's pretty fucked up.

When the author botches their, “acceptable targets,” (which is the point of that Batman critique, by the way), the entire illusion can start to break apart. And it can really expose the idea that you're trying to pretend your character is a good person, because their actions target people who the author felt were, “undeserving,” of continuing to breathe.

Falling Down (1993), with Michael Douglas and Robert Duvall is an excellent interrogation of some of these concepts. I don't want to say too much else, because the film is open to interpretations, (some of which are extremely scathing), and I think the film speaks for itself better when no one is telling you how to interpret it. Just be prepared for an uncomfortable viewing.

Back when we were both regularly active, ScriptMedic and I used to have a bit of a back and forth about pharmaceutical means to subdue someone.

Chloroform is a classic example in fiction, and it was popular in crime thrillers from 80-90 years ago, in an era when ready clinical information to laypersons was far more limited. First of all, the rag over the mouth doesn't work. This is a gas used for anesthesia, and you need a lot more than a single vial to keep someone under. Second, you need to keep applying it to keep them under. Again, that rag isn't going to hold enough. Third, if you somehow got enough chloroform onto that rag, it would sedate everyone in the vicinity, because it's an anesthetic gas. (The liquid form is extremely volatile, and will quickly convert to a gas at room temperature. That gas is what is supposed to knock someone out.) Fourth it used to be a common additive in toothpaste, and frequently occurs as an out-gassing from polymers and adhesives. Popular culture hilariously overestimates how potent this stuff is. You need a lot to put someone under, and you need a trained anesthesiologist to keep them under without accidentally killing them. Also, prolonged use results in liver damage and cardiac issues, which is why we no longer use it for anesthesia. If you try to put someone under without an anesthesiologist, and you manage to sedate them... they'll die. Turns out, it also suppresses the respiratory system, and they suffocate.

It's a similar story with most anesthetic gasses, and in fact, chloroform is one of the “sleeping gasses.” Not all of them have the liver or heart issues, but none of them are, “fire and forget.”

ScriptMedic was a fan of Ketamine for knocking out characters. And, to be fair, Ketamine is fantastic for anesthesiologists. Exceeding the necessary dosage just puts the patient out for longer, which may be inconvenient, but it's vastly preferable to, death. The problem is, it's not great for fire and forget tranq adventures. Ketamine does not suppress salivation. Which isn't a big deal on the operating table, as you can pretty easily keep someone from drowning in their own spittle, but if you just inject some poor mook, and leave them on the curb, they're going to drool themselves to death.

Actual tranquilizer guns are a real thing. They're frequently used in animal control. You don't use these on people because TV lied to you. You get darted, and if you decide to keep the dart in your neck as a peculiar fashion statement, you've still got somewhere between fifteen minutes to an hour to finish up whatever you were doing, before someone rudely added a nap to your schedule. Oh, yeah, and if the dose is too high, these anesthetics can kill you. Dosage calculations with these things are educated guesses at best, and it's why sometimes animal control really can't afford to use tranq guns. It's not callousness, it's a calculus between the threat the animal poses to others, and if they have the time to wait and see if the tranqs work.

What you really need to not shy away from, is the idea that if your character engages in violence, there are going to be consequences for that violence. Unlike in real life, as the author, you are responsible for applying those consequences to the participants. This creates a real problem when you have authors who intentionally try to skirt around the parts of the events they find uncomfortable it reduces the impact of that violence.

To drag up that Batman example, the reason it's a slightly peculiar and subversive take is because it's outside the scope of the comics. Batman goes in, beats up muggers, comes out completely unharmed, and it's all okay because we know Batman's a good person, doing this for good reasons, and the muggers are still alive to reform and become better people in society.

Except, if you step away from the idea of a superhero comic, none of that makes any kind of sense.

The story you're trying to tell doesn't need every instance of violence to be followed with an extensive interrogation of the philosophical implications of what your characters did. However, if you're trying to tell a story where violence is a spectacle that happens in a regular rhythm, it's not going to hit in the same way.

I'm pretty sure I've said this many times, but violence has diminishing returns in your story. The more you use violence (particularly non-consequential violence), the less it will matter, and like any other tool you can call upon, the less your audience will respond to it.

There's nothing wrong with putting some violence with your story, but the one thing you do need to do is be honest with yourself about it. You can lie to your readers. (Though, that's something you want to be very careful of.) But, if you lie to yourself it will harm your story. Sometimes that does require doing some serious soul searching about what you're trying to do. Because, what you're trying to do right now is tell me that you want serious violence, without really coming to grips with how that constrains your options about how violence and physical harm work.

Again, there's nothing wrong with popcorn action. But if you want to write breezy fights between superheroes, you really need to admit, to yourself, that's what you're doing. Your story will be better for it.

-Starke

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[ingleaisle]

While i DEFFO think it would have been great to see in the main story outright, i do also kinda wish that ppl who reference the side comics/media of delicious in dungeon would like. Actually think critically abt the ideas espoused THERE as well bc i don't think it's an accident that ryoko kui made this comic

AND this comic

or even this extension of the main story

Not to mention the frequent asides actually DISCUSSING human-like monsters (the fishmen, dryads, harpies etc.)

Just to take it at face value that:

the characters know what they're talking about

Are operating under correct or even just assumptions

Esp when the story itself takes pains to make that actually a p major core theme in its own right.

Ryoko Kui CLEARLY has put a lot of thought into being p critical of the discussion surrounding ideas of race and even humanity and how that intersects and who gets to be involved in those discussions, and that goes beyond simply the different species of sentient peoples in the story, even if that gets a lot of focus (Toshiro/Shuro is an obvious and frequently-cited example of this, and i also think you can glean a bit from Kabru and Rin, particularly in the way they both ended up in the custody of elves, in VERY different but still paternalistic/condescending ways).

Like even with races like the Orcs, there is a kind of care put in pointing out that their relationship to humanity is a hell of a lot deeper than "they have a different number of bones, thus are not REALLY human" (and i don't think the fact that that SPECIFICALLY was Invoked as a difference was an accident either, given irl systems of racism)

tl;dr pls think critically about the presentation of the various races/species of folk in dungeon meshi, bc it's not face-value stuff that should be taken for granted and there's DEFINITELY Commentary in there

[bairdthereader]

Charlie Spring, An Appreciation: Part 1, Courage

Nick Nelson gets a lot of love, and justifiably so; I'll be the first to admit that he's amazing (see my many Nick-related posts as evidence). But I hear all too often that Charlie is leveling up by being with Nick, or that Nick is too good for Charlie. I beg to differ—vehemently—and here's why, part 1 (of 3, maybe?).

I often find myself in awe of Charlie during some of the quietest and least dramatic parts of the Heartstopper show and comics, because his bravery, resilience, and tenacity are displayed in ways that seem inconsequential, but are actually incredibly meaningful and telling. This boy has a thread of steel running through him, whether it's obvious at first glance or not.

We see this almost from the very beginning, when Charlie is assigned to a new form and told that he'll be sitting next to Nick, "one of the rugby boys," and, "I'm sure you'll get along swimmingly." Here is not only Charlie's worst personal nightmare, but also a teacher who is blithely unaware of the terrible position he's just put Charlie in--being placed in close, daily proximity to the type of person Charlie associates with the darkest time of his life. But we don't see fear on his face, or even that much dread—this tells us so much about him in just a nanosecond. There's resignation and bitterness, yes, but Charlie knows he can withstand this, because he's been there before and survived. This is borne out in later conversations with Nick where Charlie assures him that "I'm used to it." This is a horrifying injustice, one Nick rightly calls out, and it shows Charlie's resilience in the face of a degree of cruelty that many people never experience.

This little moment outside of the changing room is another revealing scene. Charlie knows exactly what he's walking into, exactly the kinds of comments and sly bullying he's going to experience in that room. He knows he will have to have his guard up every second, that he will have to prove himself to this group, even though he shouldn't have to. He also knows he'll be fighting his own self-doubt, and so this experience will be a battle on two fronts. (Three fronts, if you include trying to hide his feelings for Nick.) But he does it anyway. Sure, you could argue he's doing it solely to be near Nick, but I think this is also his way of making sure that those boys don't dictate his actions or his life. This is Charlie taking a stand. And this is just one example—he does this over and over and over again, in many different settings and situations.

Case in point, calling it off with Ben. Charlie has been the victim of what is essentially brainwashing and abuse from Ben for months. Ben has told Charlie verbally and shown him physically that Charlie means less than nothing to Ben, and that Charlie can never expect anyone to ever want him or care for him. And Charlie often, tragically, believes him. That Charlie is able to break free of this vicious cycle and take the steps to distance himself from Ben shows his immense inner strength. You can see on Charlie's face (thanks to Joe Locke's inimitable talent) that he can't even believe he's done it. And we have to keep in mind that this happens long before Nick is a real possibility, so we can't say Charlie does this for Nick. He does it for himself.

I do have to include one of the more iconic scenes, because this ⬇️is Charlie's clarion call, his hope, his banner, for the rest of this story. He knows he has a lot of problems to work through, that he's complicated and sometimes hard to interpret, so it's easy to see this scene and think Charlie's words come from a place of insecurity (and of course that is some of what's happening here). But he's strong enough to both acknowledge it and ask honestly that Nick not let those parts of Charlie become the focus of their relationship. He requests, even during this moment of almost brutal honesty and vulnerability, that Nick see him completely, as the whole person he can be, because Charlie knows that person is there inside himself. The self awareness and bravery this takes is enormous.

There are a million other moments like this that I could write about, both big and small:

But I'll end this already lengthy post with this: When one considers the amount of sheer courage Charlie has to exert just to live his daily life, it almost defies understanding. Charlie Spring is a gladiator of the mind and heart, completely worthy of any good thing.

[blitzwhore]

I just saw Blitzø get called Stolas stockholm victim I can't with this fandom anymore😭

😂 As outrageously incorrect and stupid as that take is, I'm going to go on a tangent here. I hope you don't mind.

I think every fandom has annoying people with awfully terrible takes in it. People with zero media literacy. People who hatewatch. People who think they're entitled to the exact show they would've wanted, which has nothing to do with the actual, existing show.

This is especially true for queer media, and especially true for queer cartoons. (Hi, yes. I was active in the Adventure Time, Steven Universe, Voltron, and She-Ra fandoms when those shows were airing, respectively. I've seen some stuff). Some people just can't handle queer cartoons, period. If the queer characters/ships are soft and wholesome, they're infantilising and boring, and if they're complex and nuanced and actually have conflict, they're abusive and problematic. You'll hear the same recycled arguments over and over again. Like, the shit some people are saying about Blitz and Stolas after The Full Moon? Is literally almost word-for-word what they said about Catra and Adora post-season 3 of She-Ra (and even at the end of the show).

Here's the thing, though! Those people and their bad takes are not what I want to think about what I think about a fandom. Those aren't the people I want to call the fans. They don't deserve that title. Not when so many other people are out there dedicating their time to making gifs and art and meta posts, and writing fic, and commenting/reblogging to show support, and sliding into people's DMs to scream and squee together about a thing they love.

At the end of the day, "fandom" is just a lot of people each doing their own thing. Which people you engage with and allow to stay within your line of sight will determine your fandom experience. Fandom can be a huge, convoluted, online space full of people who are constantly arguing with one another and whose takes make you unfathomably angry... Or it can be you and your 5 friends and mutuals who scream gleefully at one another in 2-note posts. You can't control what others post online, but you can control your engagement with it.

How? Well, here's what I personally do to avoid getting upset by people's stupid opinions online:

Filter 'critical' and 'anti' tags (eg. #anti stolitz #anti vivziepop #Helluva Boss critical #HB critical #vivziepop critical). Many people actually do tag their critical posts because they know it's the respectful thing to do!

If I come across a post that has one or more of those tags, obviously, I don't click through to see it under any circumstances.

If I stumble across a stranger's untagged post with hate/criticism that upsets me: I stop reading and BLOCK. Immediately. I don't look back. I don't finish reading. I don't engage. I just block block block. I <3 the block button, seriously.

If I feel my mind reeling from a bad take I just came across: I take a step back, close my phone, breathe, remember life is beautiful sometimes. Go back and watch an episode I really like. Clean my living space a little. Vent about it to a friend (but only if I really need to, because if not, I'd rather not dwell on it).

If I'm starting to feel the need to reply to someone's bad take (directly or via my own post), I instead make the decision to channel that energy into making fandom posts out of love. (I don't do this just with fandom. If I see something transphobic online, I usually react by reblogging a bunch of trans art or trans positivity posts on my main, for example). I like to think of it as putting some positivity out into the world to compensate for the negativity I just saw. So, for example, if I see someone shitting on my blorbo, I may make a silly post just saying how much I love blorbo. Or I'll make (or draft) a post about how interesting I find some of blorbo's actions. Or reblog another person's positive/interesting post about blorbo.

And finally, I stay the hell away from Twitter. Or at least, if I go on Twitter, I try my best to avoid any tweet that has text in it instead of just art. Even the people who have good opinions spend too much time arguing with the people who have bad opinions on there. I don't want to see people's bad takes! No, not even while reading founded and perfectly articulated criticism of those bad takes! So I just limit my time on Twitter. And again, if someone is putting bad takes on my TL (even if it is to counter them), I unfollow and block as needed.

All this to say, yes, it really fucking sucks to read the opinions of people who don't understand and who hate the characters and ships and worlds you love. Gosh it's the worst. But you can curate your fandom experience. You can focus on the things you can control. You have the power to decide if your fandom experience is draining or fun!

And because I don't know how to finish this, here, have a Stolitz kiss to heal you:

We will keep winning and there's nothing the haters can do about it. 😌

[enchantressiren]

❝𝐏𝐀𝐂: 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐟𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐚𝐬𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫. 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐜𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭, 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟.❞

How can you improve your sex life?

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Pac Summary!

⭐ How to improve your sex life?

⭐ When will the improvement happen?

⭐ Guidance.

Moodboard | Divider | Header | Question: @hzive, thank you.

Pile I

How can you improve your sexual life?

The hanged man and three of pentacles.

I need you to figure out what you want in life. What are you striving for? What goals do you have in mind but push to the side for pleasure? Sex isn’t everything; sex isn’t short-term satisfaction. There is more to it. Sex is about intimacy and finding solace with it despite who it is with. Sex is about finding what you like and how your body reacts. It’s beautiful. You need to find things that make you happy. This pile keeps having sex with everyone because they are lost. You do not know what you want. You need to take time with yourself and understand who you are. Learn to be comfortable with you. Learn to have patience with who you are and as you become horny, masturbate instead. You cannot keep seeking sex with everyone else if you cannot even pleasure yourself. Some people cannot masturbate because they do not become turned on by themselves. Some of you are service tops; despite this, try it out. At least become in tune with what you actually want and allow other people to take control. A lot of service tops need to serve, so start to serve yourself. Treat your body like a temple. Take time off when it comes to one-night stands, and maybe learn what you truly need. 

Intuition tells me that you need to allow people to come into your life instead of shunning them away. Allow love to come your way, service tops, and those who mean well to make you feel happy. A lot of you guys focus on the negativity of life; instead, transform those past experiences into wisdom for yourself. For example, a lot of you self-sabotage because it’s easier for you. You are aware of it, but removing it is incredibly hard without support, so become your support person. Take baby steps as you heal, and stop being hard on yourself. You already become anxious when you do this and then sabotage yourself when something good is coming. But it’s the same, no? You still have the anxious thoughts, so remind yourself this, ‘’when you have anxious thoughts and want to sabotage, don’t. Let it come through, all the feelings of myself sabotaging are the same, it’s still the scared and sinking feeling. Why should I allow myself negativity when I can earn something beautiful?’’ 

When does this improvement happen?

Temperance and page of cups reversed. 

The improvement can only happen if you want it to happen. We cannot help those who do not want to be fixed, the same logic applies here. Combining both cards, the temperance and page of cups reversed, the improvement happens after something negative appears in your life. This could be you becoming self-aware after this reading, a situation occurring in your workplace, someone in your family becoming sick, someone dying—something negative. Either way, whatever it is, without it, this improvement cannot happen. You can try to improve without it occurring, but you will relapse into the same cycle once more. This reminds me of 999. 999 is associated with the end of something, a cycle, a chapter in your life, etc. You are going to embody 999 after this occurs. When it does, be patient with yourself and don’t push away the change, embrace it. I hear some of you say, ‘’easier said than done.’’ Yes. Yes, it is. It’s simple. We humans make things complicated because that is what we were taught, and yet there are people who become rich by doing nothing. Don't make your life complicated; embrace the change and go slow as it comes to you. As you heal, allow your knowledge to help you out, and if you need to find someone to talk to, then do so. Doesn’t matter who, as long as your gut feeling says they are trustworthy, then that is what matters. But allow yourself to listen to their advice if you believe it will help, and don’t gaslight yourself if you don’t follow them. Follow what you believe is right, follow what your gut feeling says. I know you follow your heart, I feel it, but sometimes our intuition says otherwise.

Any guidance needed?

Three of wands. 

Find things that gave you a sense of purpose in your past. Often, we ignore the past for change, it’s too heartbreaking to remember, or it’s something that doesn’t appeal to us. There is something in your past that will help you improve your sex life but also your life in general. Allow your mind to relax with everything that is going on. Some of you have coping mechanisms around animals, like horseback riding, some of you worked on the farm or have grown up with that. It was a fulfilling thing, so allow yourself to wander around that. Allow yourself to be around a farm area or go horseback riding, and if you can, take lessons. Work at a farm if you can, or volunteer there. As for the rest, allow yourself to do what kids do if they grew up in a healthy environment. They do things as they please without allowing others’ judgment to shun them. So some of you want to do something ‘’childish’’ but are afraid of others’ judgment, but don’t be. We are always going to be judged, no matter what we do. We can protect someone and get blamed, we can help someone but get ridiculed and called naive. But at the end of the day, if we do something that we like then that is what matters. Your own interests should matter, not what others say. If you have a thing for watching cartoons, but someone sees it as childish, then ignore what they think. Cartoons are fun to watch, hell, I love watching Scooby Doo. Do you find that childish? If you do, then you have to work on your inner thoughts, and if not, then see? So all you need to do is allow yourself to be happy again and stop seeking sex for pleasure when everything you need is your past and what your gut feeling says. Find a healthy coping mechanism instead of sex, and make sure it benefits you in the long run. 

Masterlist ♡

Pile II

(Tw: vague mentions of rape and sexual abuse. Please take care of yourself and do not read if you aren’t ready. When you are, I recommend you read it since it’s a meaningful message for you). 

How can you improve your sexual life?

Ace of wands.

There isn’t much for you to improve in your sexual life. You already enjoy yourself in moderation, either with a friends with benefit or your lover. I feel a commitment included in this pile, so it’s possible you have a fling with the same person from time to time. You are successful when it comes to this because you prioritize yourself. Ace of wands is focused on success in all aspects, so I was wondering why you needed this reading until I felt a lack of healing. 

You guys have sexual trauma that occurred at a young age, but you never healed from it because of a lack of resources. Some of you tried to heal but stopped because you became triggered. Some of you tried going to a therapist but found nothing because you were invalidated. What you went through is valid and was always valid. 

So I need you to be extremely gentle with yourself when you do heal. I am aware of those who have fwb; emotional connection isn’t supported in the relationship, but I do feel that you are close with them. Try speaking to them about it because intuition says they could never judge you for it. With your partner, you feel disappointed in yourself if you were to speak about it; you believe that if you did, they could never love you. But that’s fear, it’s not the truth. Intuition tells me and the ace of wands tells me, that when you do tell them (this is for everyone reading this pile), it will be successful because they all know you weren’t in the wrong, what you went through is painful, as no one should have gone through that, and they want to be there for you as you heal. 

Ace of wands always symbolizes a new opportunity to grow from, use this as an opportunity for yourself as you walk into something unknown. Sometimes the unknown can be scary, but without fear and feeling uncomfortable, you will never reach your highest potential. 

When does this improvement happen?

The lovers and seven of cups.

 When you do decide to tell them what happened to you during your childhood and close to your teenage years. The storm you allowed to destroy your ship (not being raped, or sexually abused, loves. It’s when you allow your anxious thoughts to drown you in fear and self-hatred that you will finally be able to sail into a calm ocean with a beautiful sunset. Intuition tells me all you need is to tell them what has happened, even if it takes you time or you must plan it out. Doesn’t matter, go with the flow and allow your inner child to speak for themselves. Which means, whatever comes from your mouth and you cannot control it as you speak; it is your inner child protecting and helping you throughout this journey. 

The lovers indicate that once you do tell them, the change will appear, but with the seven of cups, it will take 7 months. Meaning, once you mention it to them and they help you. I see someone comforting your energy as they caress your hair and smile so endearingly towards you. But after you say it, once 7 months have passed, you will feel at ease and will be healed. However, I do hear 8–9 months also being a possibility. This is dependent on whether you decide to plan out what you will tell them, but I do recommend letting your inner child say it for you.

Any guidance needed?

Two of cups reversed. 

Two of cups reversed confirm what I said. This card focuses on balancing out your life and not allowing unhealthy relationships to be your main focus. Also, there is a lack of harmony in your life.

Intuitively speaking, this is about your reoccurring trauma and nightmares appearing to you when you are feeling happy. I see someone reading a book outside on their balcony, sipping their drink and smiling to themselves as they read. But their minds become foggy, and their hands start to shake. Their minds scatter to a dark scene with the same ship metaphor I spoke of. The ship crashes and everything breaks apart, and then the person’s shadow drowns in the dirty and gloomy ocean. So this isn’t self-sabotage since some of you have been concerned with it; it’s based on unhealed trauma surrounding your heart and soul. When someone doesn’t heal from their repressed emotions or trauma, it causes pain in our bodies, so that’s why you've also been having back or wrist pain. Another thing my intuition tells me is that you must take baby steps as you heal. This is crucial if you don't want to relapse. A lot of you have been hard on yourself as you healed because of your grandparents, but I need you to treat yourself as you would with your pets. You treat them with so much love, so do the same with yourself.

A lack of harmony comes with that, but with balancing. Try eating the foods you have been procrastinating on. I feel that a lot of you won't have coffee in the morning because it’s bad, and that is fine. But try tea instead, lavender tea is good for the nerves, helps with sleep, makes you happier, and helps with skin. Don’t add any sugar. I know the taste isn't the best, but you do eat healthy as it is, so this may help calm down those thoughts that occur. And I know you have tried to control them but you have lost it, so try doing something that soothes you. Don’t use porn or social media as a coping mechanism; same with music. In moderation, it’s fine, but I would like to see you do something that benefits you in the long run. 

Studies show that exercising in the morning boosts your mood, helps your body, and improves productivity. Start adding exercise to your daily life and think of it as a privilege. And for those who already do it, try doing it in the morning if you can, and if not, when you do it at night, make sure you drink lots of fluids but not so much because that can cause kidney problems. And for those of you who are disabled and cannot do it, I know some can do it, but if you cannot. Then you can do upper-limb strength training, aquatic exercise, or isometric exercises. Or even chair cardio.  Caroline Jordan has workouts focused on chair cardio. She is always encouraging and uplifting, so I recommend using her videos. If you click on chair cardio, I have linked a video you can use.

Masterlist ♡

Pile III

How can you improve your sexual life?

Knight of wands.

Honestly, a lot of you don’t play around with your kinks. I am hearing some of you are into pee kinks, while some of you like creampies. I also hear restraints and a wedgie kink. A lot of you feel embarrassed about this because it’s not a topic spoken about when it comes to kinks. So instead of exploring it, you ignore them and go vanilla. Sure, creampies and being restrained with handcuffs, ropes, or scarves are talked about a lot in the BDSM community, but it's rare to hear about chains. So the idea of being different scares you—following societal norms is easier because there is no judgment. Let go of these judgments, and please explore your sexual kinks. Everyone has different kinks for a reason; kinks are meant to be experimented with. How do you think they were made to begin with? All I can say is that I don’t care what your kinks are; I care if you enjoy yourself during your sexual acts. 

Knight of wands is about daring adventures and self-assured confidence. Use this card as a goal in your life to achieve it. Being a bold person or self-reliant can be a struggle in the sexual department. I'm sure the idea of even giving yourself a wedgie, allowing someone to pleasure you with creampies, or chaining you up scares you. But at the end of the day, it turns you on. Right? So why let those fears stop you? Judgment is everywhere. I have gotten judgment on @sefinaa because my higher self post was harsh, but who cares? I believe fear can eat us away, drown us in quicksand, you name it. But we have to ignore those thoughts and speak our truth. So I did that and kept the post, and now it’s your turn to do the same with this. 

I hear, ‘’what if I cannot find someone like that?’’ Yet my intuition says you won’t allow yourself to find that. Allow your movement and your body to do the work for you as you follow along. This is all about focusing on your gut feelings. Trust them. They mean well. 

When does this improvement happen?

Five of swords and high priest. 

This is your confirmation of fear and pushing past your boundaries as you explore your kinks. Five of swords is focused on conflict, challenges, and communication. You lack communication with your sexual self. Do not feel embarrassed as you explore your sexual needs. It’s a beautiful thing. I truly believe that once you explore them, you will feel more connected to yourself and your soul. Learn to communicate with those you have sex with. For those who have a lover, do not be embarrassed to mention what kink you have. Give them time to process the information; do not allow their facial expression to dictate what they say. Remember, this is about focusing on your experience and projection, so time is always needed. Those who have non emotional relationships like a master, owner, flings, or fwb—keep in mind that you need to make sure you actually enjoy having sex with them. A majority of you do it because you are forcing yourself to like their kinks. I keep hearing, ‘’cum on your face or swallow my spit.’’ So, don’t force yourself to swallow their cum or them cumming on your face. You obviously hate it, and you shouldn't do something that causes you distress. It’s your body, your rules. You should be the one in control when it comes to your body, and I am not referring to pets/subs. I am speaking about what you do with your body because boundaries can be set. Remember to focus on what makes you happy during sex or when you masturbate with yourself. But I am not picking up masturbation within this pile. 

The high priest isn’t giving me a specific time for improvement. So this depends on what you do with this pile. It depends on how you want to approach this. Because the card focuses on inner wisdom and focusing on your intuition rather than always being rational when making decisions. There isn't anything wrong with being logical, but using your gut to make decisions for yourself is better. Intuition knows best, and logic can only do so much; the same is true of following our hearts. So all I can say is that once you decide what you want to do, everything will follow, like a group of ducks or baby chicks. 

Any guidance needed?

Ace of pentacles. 

There isn’t much guidance needed since I mentioned everything you needed to improve. However, all I can say is to make sure to set your intentions for yourself. For example, if you wanted to tell your fling or your lover that you wanted them to indulge in your chain kinks, then go ahead, but make sure that’s something you want to do. Try to be present with what you actually want and need instead of daydreaming about the things you want. Meaning, listen to your body and what it wants. So if your body doesn’t want chains but instead desires blindfolds, then speak about it to yourself first. Give yourself consent first rather than the other person, and once you feel comfortable, tell them. People always give consent to other people, but midway through the session, they realize it's not what they wanted. So you are going to stop that cycle and instead teach yourself that your consent matters most. The ace of pentacles symbolizes new beginnings and opportunities in the material world. But this reading isn’t about that, so with your energy, it’s about the sexual and mental world. Once you have accepted what your true kinks are, learn about them so it doesn't hurt your body, and give yourself the consent you need. You will start to see new people coming into your life who are interested in the same kinks. Because what you accept and want will come into your life; in simple terms, our thoughts create our reality. What you think you deserve is what will come into your life. So that is why self-pitying yourself will not lead you anywhere other than a rabbit hole of misery. Focus first on self-acceptance, and everything will follow.

Masterlist ♡

Pile IV

How can you improve your sexual life?

Knight of swords.

Woah, okay. You guys are very reckless when it comes to your sexual lives. You will try out different kinks out of curiosity and once you don’t like them, you keep acting on them. You love to have fun with your sex life; the thrill is intoxicating, but even so, fun things can become poisonous. I feel adrenaline in my body right now; this is your energy. Hyperness is evident too, so I hear you guys may suffer from ADD/ADHD or BPD. Either way, calming your mind becomes hard because your mind is scattered. Ironically, as I was shuffling your cards, Scatterbrain by Emei appeared. As I was saying, your mind is drifting from one topic to another (like mine is), and calming it down makes you feel dizzy. So instead of focusing on the anxious thoughts of calming down, learn to be okay with how your mind is. Then you can start taking deep breaths as you calm your mind. Intuition tells me there are people who have antisocial personality disorder, or ASPD. And having sex doesn’t feel like anything to you, it’s just there. The idea of a sexual life bores you. 

So for everyone reading this pile. Instead of having sex or touching yourself constantly, take a break. Take a long ass time from this and learn to understand what you really want. Do you honestly want to become hyper-fixated on sex and the kinks you do just because of the adrenaline rush? Do you honestly want to have sex just to feel something or to trigger your abandonment fears? What exactly are you seeking from your sexual life? 

Confirmation: ace of pentacles and seven of wands reversed.

There is a defeated and disappointed feeling lingering in the pit of my stomach. I have a dissatisfied feeling, and I feel incredibly bored as I do your reading. But this is how you feel. You are incredibly bored with everything you do, so excitement is what has become fulfilling. For those with antisocial personality or ASPD, the thought of pleasing someone’s bores you despite the front you put on. You cannot even get orgasms anymore because everything is the same, so change up your routine. Those with ADD/ADHD and/or BPD, explore the kinks you actually loved or liked and start doing it with your lover(s), flings, etc.

I mentioned scatterbrain and hyperness with your pile. Everyone here is chaotic in their own way. Even for those who appear calm, your mind drifts away to something else. Allow yourself to find things that keep you focused. Going from one topic to the next is not an issue, but try to figure out what makes you feel at peace. Intuition says to do something with cooking, baking, or making experimental alcoholic beverages. The experimentation can feel fulfilling for your inner child, but keep everything in moderation. 

Wow, as of right now, I feel complex energy with each of you. Despite you all having different mental health issues, you all struggle with the same thing. There is a lack of fulfillment. Sometimes people will show gratitude for food or when they buy themselves something. Sometimes it’s seeing a beautiful sunset or enjoying their favorite music. Either way, try adding a gratitude mindset to your life. The idea of showing gratitude first is boring because you aren’t aware of what you are grateful for until you keep at it. 

When does this improvement happen?

As I mentioned, despite all the mental health issues you have, you’re all struggling the same. I shuffled three cards, and their theme is in a forest. They have the same theme and vibe, yet every one of them is different from the other. This is all of you.

Ace of cups, the empress reversed, and king of pentacles. 

All three cards are of a higher being or authority in their world. Which means you all have a superior complex, a hero complex, or believe you are better than everyone else. Each card is for each mental disorder, so let’s start.

ASPD (Antisocial personality disorder)

Ace of cups.

Alright, loves. You are struggling with the idea of intimacy and love. There is never any passion when it comes to your sex life with other people you sleep with. It’s always the same shit, sex, and barely any aftercare before disappearing. Intuition says, ‘’learn to give them aftercare when you take control. Sure, you aren’t obligated, but it will show you an understanding of intimacy and what love really means. The idea of letting go of that hero or god complex and helping someone you fucked can help reduce all of those unwavering thoughts you ignored.’’ When you see the world in gray and boring colors, everything around you becomes worse, and you feel things are darker than they appear. Learn to understand how you put yourself out there, and start to understand that it’s okay to be empty sometimes. Accept that part of yourself, but show compassion to other people even if you won’t gain anything from it. It doesn't hurt you if you help someone; maybe it affects your pride, but pride can be our downfall sometimes. So learn to balance your pride and the itch you have when you help someone. Remember, you aren’t disgusting or weird if you help someone without expecting anything in return. Not everything should be a game; learn to let go of that concept and show compassion to yourself and others. Once you do this, in a span of 1-4 months, you will be able to heal that void in your heart and feel more satisfied with the world around you.

BPD (Borderline personality disorder)

The empress reversed.

Why are you confused about what you want with sex? You already know it, so why do you stop yourself from experiencing that joy? I mean, you know what kinks you like. You aren’t scared, in fact, you’re chilling as it is. So what really makes you stop? I hear that you have overprotective parents, and you cannot always sneak out, or when you do, it doesn't end well. So going out at night or in the evening makes it easier for you, but you encounter weird people and weird situations. And this has caused you to believe in the paranormal, so you bring it up as a conversation with the people you sleep with, but they give you disgust or find you to be crazy. Either way, it bothers you because you're being authentic with everyone, but no one is doing the same. Then you wonder why you cannot find the right people, but have you thought about looking in the right places? Intuitively speaking, find people you know first. Find their interests and look for friends with benefits. Because this world is shallow and no one truly focuses on authenticity, the fear of vulnerability lingers. So first, thank you for being true to yourself, and I'm very proud of you. Second, when making friends, make sure they are interested in friends with benefits because consent is crucial, but also for you not to waste your time. The empress reversed is about imbalances in relationships and impatience. Learn how to forgive yourself for your past and other people. But remember, forgiving someone isn’t about forgiving them for what they did to you; it’s about letting go of what they did while respecting yourself in the process. You no longer have the thoughts, the thoughts don't eat you alive, and you relieve a big weight off your shoulders. So in reality, you aren't actually forgiving them per se; it’s for your benefit and for you to move on and then finally find these people. Make sure to remember that you are worthy of having someone to have sex with and enjoying each moment with them, even the intimacy you crave when it comes to aftercare. Even though it can appear to be an emotional thing, I mean, to some people, it is like it is with me. But it’s important for the both of you to be taken care of, so make sure that when you do aftercare, you take turns and balance it out. Fair play is always important during sex. For you to find the person you have been looking for, you need to learn more about yourself. What are you actually seeking? Do you truly want a fwb, or is it actually a lover, but you are afraid of commitment? Does the idea of emotional aftercare scare you, or does it intrigue you? Are you okay with sharing (one-night stands, masters having other pets or subs, or fwbs), or do you prefer to have one person? Are you interested in a polygamous relationship, or does that make you uncomfortable? Once you understand these questions and fully grasp them, then look for that person. It’s not truly about looking but allowing your intuition to drag you along. Eventually, you will just know when you find them and let them know what you want from them. If it’s a date, let them know and stay authentic with yourself, so if you prefer to wait it out, then wait it out, and if not, go for it. And if it’s a fwb, be up front with them immediately and see where that leads you. Because intuition says they were looking for you—like red strings on your wrist, a soulmate story. You will meet them in 8 months.

ADD/ADHD (Attention Deficit Disorder/Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder)

King of pentacles.

Right off the bat, I feel doubtful, confused, and dizzy. That’s obviously how you have been feeling, so you use thrills as your coping mechanism. And you know you are hurting your body or that you have a higher risk of pregnancy, but the idea of going back to those thoughts scares you shitless. So here is what you're going to have to do to heal. Find kinks that make you interested and make your body feel amazing. Let your lover know that you are interested in food, pet play, or something to do with a gag, and/or choking. Tell them what makes you aroused, and stop faking your orgasm with them. Authenticity is important during intimacy; it’s all about trust, and faking it is breaking that trust. Make sure you protect yourself during sex if it’s not with a lover, because I do hear, ‘’taken advantage.’’ So don't go for fake successful men with suits, regardless of your gender. They are snakes. ‘’How am I going to know?’’ is what appeared in my mind. Intuition. Your intuition will tell you so. Do you feel a sinking feeling or a sour taste? That’s when you know. The king of pentacles is all about succeeding. Tarot wants you to succeed in life and find what you're looking for. The cards encourage you to create the life you love. What kind of life do you love? What truly makes you happy? What makes you happy with your lover? What makes you excited to wake up with a bright smile on your face? Focus on shadow work and understanding the sexual part of who you are, and accept them as such. As for when the healing will happen? During the fall season, intuition says it is possible for it to appear at the end of December. This is a timeless reading, but intuition also says, ‘’you need to actually work on it. It cannot come to you like abracadabra. Healing takes a lot of work, do not half ass it.’’ Make sure you actually focus on healing this, and understand that a thrill can also be your demise. And please, take care of yourself as you have sex with strangers. I want you to be safe because I hear that you have encountered bad situations with people. So please take care of yourself, thanks. 

Any guidance needed?

Take a break before you all do this. Breaks are important; it’s all about balancing what you want and coming to terms with whether this is what you really need. Not want. Sometimes we want things, but they're not for us or aren’t part of our lives or our higher selves' paths. And sometimes we struggle to understand why, so take this into consideration when you doubt if the situation will occur. All of you need to learn how to trust your intuition. Your intuition knows best and means well. Do not see them as enemies; they want to help, but you must allow them to help you. 

Judgment. 

The judgment card is about spiritual awakening, transformation, and absolution. Absolution is about releasing guilt and forgiving. It would appear you are all on your journey to a spiritual awakening. It has not happened yet, but after the timing I listed, it will happen. And damn, it will be so fucking scary but so worth it in the end, I promise. The journey is scary because there are so many ups and downs. And there are so many roller coasters that can cause you to cry and wonder why you deserve these pains. But once you become healed or learn to heal, you understand why, and that is what makes you fulfilled and appreciative. This is why healing is so beautiful and should be protected at all costs. 

So, what guidance do you need? Not much. Just focus on what I said about improvement because it was done individually. Other than that, new people will be coming into your life to teach you many lessons. So use those lessons to learn things about yourself, and do not push away those lessons. Lessons help guide us through life; if a situation is reoccurring, then you are missing something. For example, if you are always helping people, but they fuck you over. Learn to understand that it’s because you do not prioritize yourself and focus on other people’s needs. And understand that people come and go; do not stay in the past or hold on to them. Thank them for their time, or the lesson they give you internally or not, and heal from it as you let go and forgive them. 

Remember, this is all a big decision for yourself, so do not rush it so much, but do not plan it out so much either. Balance it and keep an open mind as a lot of changes appear in your life. 

Masterlist ♡

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

Emily: "You know what? You're right, Sera- it IS super important that the BEST angel in heaven did what she had to do for the sake of others, no matter the cost to herself."

Sera: "Thank you, Emily. I-"

Emily: "An example to us all, honestly. A good reminder of what it's actually supposed to mean to be even be an angel."

Sera: "I try my best-"

Emily: "Pity we scarred her and abandoned her in hell."

Sera: "...."

Emily: "...."

Emily: "Charlie invited me down there for dinner with them, by the way."

Sera: "You will not be going-"

Emily: "Without a housewarming gift for their rebuilt hotel? That WE destroyed? Of course I won't, Sera, don't be silly."

Sera: "Emily, for heaven's sake-"

Emily: "I was thinking about that! To help smooth things over after we attacked hell, it might be nice to bring something personal. A framed formal apology, maybe. For Vaggie. Specifically."

Sera: "Adam and Lute handled that situation without consulting me."

Emily: "Oh no, I meant an apology for sending them to try killing her, her girlfriend, and their friends... but now you mention it- putting people like Adam and Lute in charge of her in the first place? That's probably good 'I'm sorry Vaggie' material too."

Sera: "Necessary actions do not require an apology."

Emily: "True. This is more of a groveling situation, isn't it?"

[anghraine]

Random thought before back to defense prep:

Something I find interesting and enjoyable about P&P is the way that Austen both foreshadows various revelations about Darcy and complicates them before they ever happen. This is typically done through subtle asides or quick interchanges that don't necessarily register as that significant at the time, but still gives the readers a chance to pick up on what's really going to happen.

Just a few examples:

1- Elizabeth and Charlotte briefly discuss how difficult it would be for an outsider, and perhaps Bingley himself, to detect Jane's true feelings:

It was generally evident, whenever they [Jane and Bingley] met, that he did admire her; and to her [Elizabeth] it was equally evident that Jane was yielding to the preference which she had begun to entertain for him from the first, and was in a way to be very much in love; but she [Elizabeth] considered with pleasure that it was not likely to be discovered by the world in general, since Jane united with great strength of feeling, a composure of temper and an uniform cheerfulness of manner, which would guard her from the suspicions of the impertinent. She mentioned this to her friend, Miss Lucas. “It may, perhaps, be pleasant,” replied Charlotte, “to be able to impose on the public in such a case; but it is sometimes a disadvantage to be so very guarded.”

2- Darcy tries to warn Elizabeth at the Netherfield Ball:

“I can readily believe,” answered he, gravely, “that reports may vary greatly with respect to me; and I could wish, Miss Bennet, that you were not to sketch my character at the present moment, as there is reason to fear that the performance would reflect no credit on either.”

3- Charlotte tries to "read" Darcy at Rosings:

He [Darcy] seldom appeared really animated. Mrs Collins knew not what to make of him. Colonel Fitzwilliam’s occasionally laughing at his stupidity proved that he was generally different, which her own knowledge of him could not have told her; and as she would have liked to believe this change the effect of love, and the object of that love her friend Eliza, she set herself seriously to work to find it out: she watched him whenever they were at Rosings, and whenever he came to Hunsford; but without much success.

4- literally the next chapter, one of the funnier miscommunications between Elizabeth and Darcy in Kent:

More than once did Elizabeth, in her ramble within the park, unexpectedly meet Mr Darcy. She felt all the perverseness of the mischance that should bring him where no one else was brought; and, to prevent its ever happening again, took care to inform him, at first, that it was a favourite haunt of hers. How it could occur a second time, therefore, was very odd! Yet it did, and even the third. It seemed like wilful ill-nature, or a voluntary penance; for on these occasions it was not merely a few formal inquiries and an awkward pause and then away, but he actually thought it necessary to turn back and walk with her. He never said a great deal, nor did she give herself the trouble of talking or of listening much; but it struck her in the course of their third rencontre that he was asking some odd unconnected questions—about her pleasure in being at Hunsford, her love of solitary walks, and her opinion of Mr and Mrs Collins’s happiness; and that in speaking of Rosings, and her not perfectly understanding the house, he seemed to expect that whenever she came into Kent again she would be staying there too. His words seemed to imply it.

Very mysterious!!!! Definitely none of their communications here could justifiably be misread!!