#[ so ... i had been wanting to make a shipping call but

[ao3commentoftheday]

i'm not in this fandom anymore, but i've been thinking about this lately and thought i'd ask.

the fandom i was in, there was a trans character that i really loved, and since i love writing smut, i wanted to write one that included this character. however, there was no indication in canon of whether this character had surgery "down there" or not (i don't know how to phrase this, i'm sorry), and while that's definitely fine, i saw fans really divided on what the situation was and which would be "disrespectful" to write this character with. i saw arguments against both ways, ones that said without the surgery were fetishizing, and with the surgery were "basically writing the character as cis", which meant i never knew which would be the "right and respectful" way to write this character in smut, since both had been called disrespectful. i ended up leaving the fandom before i could figure out how to write smut for my favorite character.

thinking about this again, how should i have handled this?

This sounds like a situation where people have strong personal feelings about the character being shown as one way or the other, and they're using arguments to make people feel bad for doing the opposite. If they can make you feel bad enough, you'll stop writing the thing they dislike (or at least, that's the assumption)

It happens a lot in fandom. Like, a lot - with characters, with ships, with redemption arcs, you name it.

This character is an imaginary person, and therefore they can be anything at all. There are trans people who make changes to their bodies and there are trans people who don't. They're still trans either way - that "they're basically cis" argument doesn't track for me at all. Transness is about the person and their relationship to their gender, not about what junk they happen to have in their pants at any given time.

As with so many things in fandom, people are going to disagree about what they do and don't want to read. That's fair. In order to allow people to make informed choices, you could add a tag or an author's note so that they know going in and can decide not to read further. If they make a big stink about it after being informed, then that's their problem not yours.

I'm not trans and I haven't written smut for a trans character yet, and I apologize if anything I've said above is ignorant or misinformed. Please do correct me in the notes. I want to be supportive of trans fans 🏳️‍⚧️

If anyone knows of good tags to use in this situation, please do leave them in the notes. Are there other good ways to make this clear so that people who like a particular interpretation of a character can find those fics and those who hate it can avoid them?

[littlefireball]

WY|Fatal Temptation (M)

Siren Wooyoung x Pirate Reader

Smut|Both wooyoung and reader are attracted to each other| Mentioned of death, shoot| Make out|Sexual penetration|Mate

Setting in all Siren Stories:

Siren's singing is the opposite attraction only.

The proportion of male sirens is very small and exist solely for reproduction.

Sirens can change into human form when they landed but there is a time limit.

"Sirens' beautiful voice is like a heavenly melody, graceful and captivating. Its sound resembles the clear waves from the depths of the sea, like the sound of ripples hitting the rocks, filled with mysterious and charming rhythms.

Every time they sing, it's like a magical spell, intoxicating and mesmerizing. A magical incantation, immersed in false happiness and beauty, constantly wanting to delve deeper into the enchanting melodies.

In the end, sailors who are attracted by the song will lose themselves, allowing their bodies to be swallowed by the dark ocean, disappearing into the endless abyss."

As a crew member read out the contents of the old book, the story described in it shocked all the sailors present, creating an atmosphere of unease in the air.

"Where did you get this book?" you asked curiously, playing with the old pocket watch in your hand, curious about the origin of the water-damaged and dilapidated book.

"I found it randomly, just in that chest." The crew member pointed to a wooden box filled with various books. The books had water stains and were worn out, and the wooden box had faded due to the erosion of seawater, losing its original luster and now only displaying a dull vintage color.

"This is just a scary children's story." You scoffed at these unsubstantiated 'stories,' believing that they were strange fabrications made by people in the past to prevent others from going to sea.

"But captain, this story sounds so real…"

"Have you seen them? We've gone to sea so many times, yet we've never heard those so-called songs."

"I swear I have actually heard them!"

"Then why haven't you died yet?" Irritated by their words, you straightforwardly dismissed their baseless statements, clearly showing impatience on your face.

"If you have so much time here to read stories, why don't you go and find some treasure?" Hearing this, the others immediately got to work, leaving the ancient books on the wooden box.

"Boring."

Your gaze fell upon the ship stranded on the shore. It looked completely dilapidated, covered in weathered marks and worn-out wooden textures. The once magnificent painted exterior of the ship had been eroded and damaged over time, revealing a dull wood color and decayed parts.

Part of the ship's deck and stern had cracked due to long exposure to wind and rain, exposing the inner support structure. The sails were dirty, torn, and useless, with some masts tilting and others even breaking halfway.

As you looked at the scene, thinking about the story of the siren, you couldn't help but wonder if the ship had met its demise because of them. Ha~ how could you have such thoughts when you had just scoffed at those stories earlier? Why do you suddenly believe now? Your own mysterious thought process is quite ridiculous.

"How is that possible?" You mocked your unrealistic thoughts, not dwelling on them further, and continued to search the ship for any remaining treasures. You were the only woman on board, also the highest-ranking captain. Since childhood, you had been 'hunting' with your father at sea, searching stranded ships for supplies or treasures, and sometimes finding unexpected treasures.

However, your mother did not approve of you going to sea, especially after your father died in a sailing accident. She feared that you would end up like him, attacked by sirens and buried at sea. You didn't believe in all this talk about sirens. They were just legends. Maybe in your heart, you still refused to admit the fact that he had died a long time ago, which was why you resist anything related to sirens.

"Reporting, captain. We only found these few pieces of jewelry, no other valuable items." You nodded, instructing them to safely store the treasures they found.

"Board the ship! Prepare to set sail!"

As night falls, the moon hangs brightly in the sky, giving off a fascinating moonlight. The sea breeze blows gently across your face, soothing your body and mind. You sat on the deck and enjoyed the moment of relaxation, admiring the endless horizon in front of you.

"How would you say it would be great if someone could sing?" One crew member lamented."Yeah, it would be better if there were beautiful women dancing here." Another man chimed in, hoping that there were beauties to cheer them up and add a little fun to their boring sea life.

It seems that their wishes have been heard by the God of the Sea. A beautiful tone of music came from nowhere, the unique voice full of power, yet gentle like a soft thread, gently stroking the heartstrings.

"A cold wind blows in my frozen heart, When I lean on a small candle, And hold back my tears" (ATEEZ-be with you)

"Wow!What a beautiful voice."

"Yes! Maybe the God of the sea heard our wish! It goes so well with this beautiful scenery." The crew couldn't help but admire this exquisite female voice, and echoed one after another. All the crew members unconsciously indulged in this heavenly sound.

On the contrary, while listening to the melodious music, instead of being lost in it, your doubts arose. "Where does the female voice come from?" There was only one woman on the ship, and you hadn't been singing, let alone having such a wonderful voice. Driven by curiosity, you couldn't help but explore the truth, but the strange sight in front of you surprised you.

The crew, who had lost consciousness, gradually approached the edge of the ship and jumped into the dark sea uncontrollably. The ghostly hands reaching out from underwater dragged their bodies, making them disappear directly into the abyss.

"What…?" Your heart tightened suddenly, and dark shadows appeared in your vision. You helplessly felt fear devouring you. "Are those sirens?! No!!" Despite the fear, your responsibility as the captain reminded you not to sit idly by. You took out the handgun from your pocket and without hesitation, fired at the monsters emerging from the water's surface. Screams of agony rose and fell, and the nauseating smell of blood made you sick.

"What happened? Why weren't they controlled?" The sirens underwater were puzzled. They had never failed before, and it was impossible for anyone to be immune to their singing… unless…

"Is there a woman?"

"A woman? I never thought there would be a woman as a pirate~" Wooyoung swung his fishtail below and swam from beneath the water to underneath the ship, curious about who fired the gun. Throughout history, sailors have predominantly been men, with only a very small number of women, because humans always believed that the presence of women would bring misfortune to a fleet. That's why most sirens are female, and their songs only have an effect on men. Due to this, there are only a few male sirens, who exist solely for reproduction.

Hearing about the presence of a woman made Wooyoung excited and curious. Since he was born, he had only seen photos of human women from the belongings of stranded crew members, and had never encountered a real woman. Although the sirens grew legs during their breeding season, they were still different from human women. He wanted to know what women were really like.

"Fuck!" The bullets were about to run out, but the enemies were increasing. Continuing like this, you couldn't hold on. You desperately grabbed the sleeves of the crew members who wanted to jump into the sea, preventing them from approaching the edge of the ship. But it's too hard to grab them all; stopping one couldn't stop the others, and you could only watch helplessly as another companion perished.

"What should I do… can I only use the cannon?" You knew that firing the cannon was the only way to escape from this predicament, but it meant killing your own comrades. As you pondered, another voice sounded, but this one was relatively deep, powerful, and magnetic - it was a male voice.

"Everything in this world, Hurts so much by your side, Can I come over? Can I do that? Can I hug you?"

His voice was melodious and enchanting, like a gentle breeze that lightly touched your soul, causing you to completely immerse yourself. The hands that had been gripping the crew members' sleeves became weaker, and in the end, your fist loosened, allowing the crew members to jump into the sea. Your feet uncontrollably walked to the edge of the ship, with empty, lifeless eyes, as if the flame of life had gone out.

Wooyoung had a victorious smile on his face, extending his hands to entice you to jump into the water, but unconsciously, he stared at your beauty and became fascinated. You were bathed in the gentle moonlight, like a graceful and beautiful flower, your long hair floating in the breeze, intoxicating. Wooyoung had never seen such a scene before, and for a moment, he was captivated.

Without a moment's hesitation, you jumped into the water, the sound of the water hitting the surface pulling him back to reality. He quickly held onto your sinking body, his hands grasping your neck tightly, wanting to accelerate your suffocation. But in his mind, the scene from just now flashed again, your elegant posture making him lose focus, and your captain's uniform piqued his curiosity about your story.

What's your name? Why do you become a captain? Why do you appear on a ship? Do you have no webbed? What does it feel like to kiss a human…even have sex?

Curiosity compelled him to let go of his murderous intent and gradually release his hand from your neck. But the merciless seawater had already taken away your breath, and your heartbeat felt weak as if it would stop in the next second.

"No… no…" he cried sadly, not wanting you to die like this. He wanted to know everything about you. His scaled hand gently caressed your face, lifting your chin. Without hesitation, he directly kissed your already pale lips. Anyone kissed by a merman could gain the ability to breathe underwater. Your lips touched lightly, warm and tender. You felt a soft sensation from your lips, and then your whole body seemed to float in the water. Oxygen returned to your lungs, and you could breathe again.

You slowly opened your eyes and found the man in front of you kissing you. Surprised, you wanted to break free but he tightly held your wrists, restraining your movement. He left your lips, pleasantly surprised that you had awakened. He smiled satisfactorily and said, "Let me take you back."

Without waiting for your reaction, he carried you in his arms and swam directly into the distance. You were amazed that you could breathe underwater, feeling the gentle and powerful waves passing through your body, a wonderful sensation you had never experienced before. Unconsciously, you held onto his shoulders, pressing against his chest, feeling the only warmth in this cold seawater.

In no time, the two of you arrived back on the shore. His fish tail transformed into legs the moment it touched the land, and droplets slid along the lines of his legs onto the ground. He gently placed you back on the ground and as he looked at your face again, he became captivated once more. Despite being soaked from head to toe, you still appeared so captivating in his eyes.

"You…" Too much information flooded your mind, making it difficult for you to organize your thoughts at the moment.

"I am Wooyoung." Without hesitation, he told his name, imitating human etiquette and extending his hand towards you.

"Y… Y/N. '' Maybe because your brain wasn't functioning properly yet, you involuntarily said your name and shook his hand, covered in scales.

The soft touch of your hand was different from other sirens. There were no hard scales on it, not even the slippery texture that fish usually have. Moonlight shimmered in your eyes, sparkling like starlight, proud and radiant, incredibly enticing. Once again, he examined your attire with curiosity, his curiosity like a string gently plucked by your mysterious aura, immediately bursting into infinite passion and interest.

Everything about you was like a book full of mystery and puzzles, waiting for him to read one by one. Every action, every detail, every expression of yours fascinated him more and more, making him increasingly captivated and unable to escape. As the nature of a male siren gradually revealed itself, his once innocent curiosity turned into evil desire. He didn't just want to know your name, your experiences, your story, but he wanted to know everything about you, to have you completely.

"You are so beautiful, so stunning." He approached you even closer, bending down to maintain eye level with you. His voice was deep and magnetic, like an ocean far away from the world, full of temptation.

"I want you, Y/N." Without giving you any chance to resist, he once again sang a beautiful melody. His words came slowly, like poetry, beautiful and captivating, irresistibly seductive.

With the sound of the song, you once again lost consciousness, letting him take off your clothes, leaving only your wet underwear. The deep and magnetic voice made you indulge in his temptation, unable to resist.

Your skin, unlike the magnificent scales of a siren, was instead pure and delicate, like smooth porcelain, flawless. Under the effect of moonlight, droplets of water on your skin reflected a faint glow, radiating a charming luster, inviting one to touch.

"Oh god, you are really pretty." He lifted your chin, kissing your lips. Unlike the gentle touch earlier, this kiss hid dangerous desire behind it. Lips slowly sealed together, a warm sensation spreading slowly, the friction between tongues making Wooyoung unable to hide his smile. You also responded to his kiss, sucking on each other's lips, occasionally lightly biting each other's lips, alternating between gentleness and strength.

Your hands involuntarily roamed each other's bodies, feeling the ups and downs of each other's bodies. Fingertips brushed over every inch of skin, igniting a burning desire, embracing each other closely, rubbing against each other. His hand glided over your waist, directly caressing your buttocks, the soft touch driving him crazy, occasionally squeezing; his other hand touched your chest, tracing the contours of your nipples in circles.

Your lips never separated, becoming even more frantic, tongues soothing each other. He extended his tongue directly into your throat, wanting to explore everything about you, to taste all your sweetness.

"Ummmm…" You couldn't help but feel a slight nausea, emitting a muffled sound. But your voice didn't stop Wooyoung, instead making him more intense. To him, you were his siren. His firmness couldn't bear it any longer, he urgently needed to enter your body - to mate, he wanted to mate.

"Ride me." Each of his words held a kind of magic, completely enchanting you. He lay on the damp and uneven ground, the sensation of sharp stones pressed against his back slightly discomforting, but he wanted to watch your body as he fucked you.

"Have a seat, babe." You took off your underwear, aiming for his erect member, slowly sinking down. The initial coolness immediately wrapped in heat as you entered, causing you to let out a captivating moan. As you sat down, the sharp stones beneath Wooyoung's body pressed deeper, leaving red imprints, but that didn't deter his desire to fuck you.

You supported yourself on his shoulders, beginning to bounce up and down. "Oh gosh, it feels so good!" He groaned, feeling his cock reach its deepest point as it touched every inch of your skin. The friction between his shaft and your vagina brought heat that made him more excited. Your wet walls wrapped tightly around his cock, each sucking motion stimulating his sensitive nerves.

"Fuck!" The pleasure beneath him fascinated him, he caressed your body, touching your breasts. Not knowing how to remove the bra, he tore it open from the middle, leaving the cups hanging on either side of your chest, swaying with your movements. He cupped your breasts, feeling their softness, occasionally massaging with his thumb.

"ahh~ahh~" The stimulation all over your body gave you goosebumps, every inch of your body bursting with countless sparks. Wooyoung's touches gave you endless pleasure, awakening all your senses, craving his caress.

"Louder, Y/N. I want to hear your voice."

"Ahhhh~fuck~" You released a scream from your throat, which reverberated against the walls of the cave, echoing throughout. "I can't get enough of you." He sat up straight, once again holding your face, lips tightly intertwined, the passionate kiss filling the air with sparks. Your lips and tongues twined and explored, releasing endless desire and passion.

He pressed down on you directly, this time it was your back against the rough stones, the slight pain making you slightly more awake. "ahh~wooyoung" When his name left your mouth, his entire body felt like it had been electrified, a surge of electricity ran through him, his cock twitching inside you. He had never felt such pleasure before.

"Say my name again, Y/N."

"ummm…Wooyoung." Fuck,he loves your moan so bad. His balls slapped you ass clearly as the speed of his thrusts increased with his excitement. There was no interruption in his thrusts, the tip kept hitting you in the deepest part, sperm kept flowing out and soaking your inner walls. The sounds of wacking and squeaking of water and skin slapping skin are mesmerizing, and your body's temperature continues to rise with no sign of cooling off.

"ahhh~ahhh~ahhh~" The friction from the rubbing of the gravel on your back wakes you up, while the pleasure in your lower body continues to take your mind, the double whammy making you dizzy. Unsure if you're awake or continuing to fall for his seduction, you only want more pleasure to replace the pain, letting out a moan in hopes that the man on top of you will try harder.

As expected, his thrusts quickened in speed, the intensity increasing. You arched your back, moaned, the connection between your bodies became even closer. "You are so fucking tight, different from those female sirens." "Fuck!!"He pulled you up, your skin pressed tightly together as he thrust into you. You also moved back and forth in rhythm, each thrust making you hold your breath.

"Ah! Ah! I am close." You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, buried your face in his neck, and screamed, your nails sinking into the palm of your hand, eyes squeezed shut, feeling yourself reaching the edge.

"I am gonna fuck my eggs inside your cunt." He also felt that he was about to climax, all the hot streams rushing to the tip of his shaft, about to overflow. With the maximum force, he thrust forward, after a few more thrusts, all the hot streams were released, and you reached climax in a moan.

His eggs creamed your cunt fully, even dripping onto the ground, the sharp stones beneath you stained with white liquid. He had never experienced such a climax, let alone produced so many eggs.

"That's my best sex ever." He pecked your lips and pulled out of your body. You also regained your composure, breathing not as rapid as before, your mind also becoming clear. You could now clearly see the man's face in front of you, his gaze was as deep and cold as the ocean, as if it could see through you completely; his lips were red,a mole on the lower lip and shaped perfectly, slightly upturned, exuding an enticing smile, but also revealing a dangerous aura.

"Wanna come with me?"

"Where?"

"To the sea, where I belong." He returned to the water, his legs transformed into a fish tail, gracefully floating. His body was slim and strong, his skin fair and smooth like a seashell. Wet hair pushed back, droplets shimmering under the moonlight, emanating an enchanting atmosphere.

The mysterious aura and unique charm that radiated from him made you feel like he was a being from the endless abyss. The ocean boiled because of his charm, creatures dancing around him, as if they had already been captivated by his beauty, praising this beautiful and mysterious existence. This was the most mysterious and seductive treasure that you, as a pirate, had ever pursued in your life.

All the animosity, all the doubts vanished long ago. Now you were completely immersed in the whirlpool called him, unable to wake up.

"Come with me, Y/N." He extended his hand towards you, each word seemed to be immersed in the music flowing in the water, awakening your desires and dreams hidden deep inside you. Without any hesitation, you took his hand, diving into the dark depths of the sea together.

From then on, no one knew the whereabouts of you and the crew - just like your father.

[my-love-is-sunlight]

Sun kissed

Monkey D. Luffy x reader

Fluff fluff and just more fluff, confession, gender neutral reader no use of pronouns or gendered descriptions

1.5k words

You had never met someone like Luffy

He was once in a lifetime kind of guy, but familiar all the same; like the sun going down painting the skies with beautiful hues to then disappear as the moon anchors up above, the scenery a natural beauty that would repeat itself the next day but breathtaking nonetheless

Relentless and brave beyond belief, the only thing keeping him going when his body gives up being his unmeasurable conviction, a selfish captain that always gets what he wants, he hates being called a hero yet he possesses the biggest kind heart of gold you had ever seen

It wasn’t a surprise when you realized your admiration for your Captain went beyond just that, after all, he had freed you; offering you a place in his crew, an unbreakable friendship that you cherished and a promise to both achieve your dreams together

The roles of captain and crew member being almost nonexistent nor necessary; every single strawhat had sworn loyalty to Luffy just because he had been the purest of friends, not needing an explanation for their past or behavior before extending his support and kindness. He saw something in all of you and that was enough, his role only held by this unspoken respect and trust

However, the base of the strawhats crew was the already so mentioned friendship, there was this dynamic you had to follow even if it pained you to do so

Because you didn’t wanted to get in his way

Luffy was so busy working to be the king of the pirates, you knew the moment he got to see you walking before him with your heart in your hands he would decline the offering, even if the lines between your relationship were already so blurry

Even as you beat yourself up to ‘stay in the lane’ there was this natural flow that would bring Luffy to your shore, as it would also bring you to his

It’s always you and him

You the first to jump to defend his name even if held by gunpoint, screaming at the top for your lungs that he would be the next king of the pirates making his heart swell. You the first he looks for in the battlefield, he believes in your strength but his mind can only think about your safety and wellbeing. You the first to join in his laughter, joy spreading all across your being as you both giggle with big bright smiles that seem to grow bigger at each other’s sight. You the only one he doesn’t steal food from when you’re sitting at dinner

you and him

Regardless of how close and how happy you were, souls destined to intertwine, Luffy would be a liar if he said he didn’t notice the sadness and uncertainty that started to gloss over your face whenever your gaze looked for his. A lot of things he is, perceptive a quality a lot of people seemed to brush off

“Why are you doing that face?”

You sat side by side on his seat on top of The Sunny, the celebration for yet another victory unfolding behind you becoming a little unbearable since your eyes could not be peeled off your Captain, your heart heavy with unspoken feelings hanging form your tongue

You crook a small smile- “What face?” Your question answering his questions makes the pirate frown and huff in annoyance, his arms crossing in front of his scarred chest

“You have been doing that face every time I look at you”- even though he’s making an statement it sounds more like a reproach “Are you upset with me?”

Your heart falls to the sea that rocks the ship at a slow tranquil pace, your breath picking up speed as your try to make up for the emptiness in your chest- “N-No Luffy I could never get mad at you!”

He remains quiet, a frown still hanging form his lips as his eyes do a one over your nervous form, as if looking for an answer in your body language, but it ever appears- “Something is not right, you’re not… you”

Your face drops and your eyebrows knit in pain, making it now impossible to miss the thoughts that plague you as they reflect on your face, a quality of yours Luffy quite enjoyed- “I love you, please come back to you”

The first three words hit you like a Marine’s ship, eyes widening in shock mouth going dry as they replay for a couple more times before you come back to earth. A pang now replacing the emptiness you once felt as a remainder that you were in fact a real person, a human being with emotions and desires that could not be ignored for much longer

“I- you love me?” You sound absolutely incredulous

“Well of course I do! You’re one of my best friends” Luffy answered beaming with a 3000 kilowatt smile that has you burning at the sight of it

You feel dizzy, your mind reeling making everything around you spin, your breath that once struggled to be kept in now leaving your mouth in an exasperated sigh that makes your Captain confused

“What? Is that.. wrong?”

“No it’s not , it’s just that-” your words get stuck in your throat, you massage your head and temples as you meditate the answer you’re about to give, a fear creeping up that grows exponentially when you meet his eyes again

“I love you too, but not as a friend” it even surprises you how delicate and patiently every word left you, your heart coming back to life by beating faster and faster as every second passed

Luffy stays quiet again, which only feeds on your worry since he’s not someone that find themselves at a loss of words

“Oh… so like…” he struggles to pint point exactly what is it you’re trying to tell him, the thought of a romantic interest never crossing his mind before, the label lost in the wind of his wild determined motions that had led you to him. He knows this tingling sensation he gets whenever you’re alone isn’t something friends are supposed to feel, because it only happens with you. And it grows even stronger when you smile, and when your hands touch? He feels like he might combust; he knows you’re special to him, but it never occurred to him what that might actually intel

This ‘love’ Sanji always babbles about when he’s sitting waiting for his meal and tries to strike a conversation, though the cook seemed to had painted it as something more complicated, what Luffy felt for you was not complicated at all, he loved you and that was it, clear as water. This being the reason he had never approached you about it, he wasn’t sure how to go about this new feeling that was taking over him every time he saw you, an urgency to always be with you, his body begging to crash into yours

“Love” he completes his sentence though it feels like he’s assuring himself that what he just heard was what he understood

“Yes, I love you Luffy, more than friends do” he nods still thinking about your statement

“Ok! Me too!” Your eyes feel like they’re about to pop out of your skull, you’re so confused for a statement so blunt and direct

“Y-you… love me?”

“Yes, quite a lot, as much as meat actually!”- You had never came across someone like Luffy, he always seemed to surprise you with his antics but this… you were dumbfounded- “You’re funny, beautiful and strong! And so smart too! How could I not love you?” The way he speaks about his love for you makes your stomach turn in glee, like its the most obvious thing in the world, like he knows the sky is blue

Something you had never had before

A honest and real smile now spreads on your face which makes your Captain smile even wider back at you, his mission of bringing you back now complete and he basks on it, happy he got his way

“See! There you are!” His hands come up to crush your cheeks together, his fingers warm form the heat that exudes form them

“Luffy” the way his name leave your lips begs him to stop, big chocolate eyes hanging form above you like the stars in the night. Ever so slowly, your face cuts the space between you inch by inch leaving enough room for your stretchy captain to pull away if he wishes to. But he stays completely still, eager to find out where are you going and hoping it’s only closer

Your lips graze softly over his, a featherlight feeling that could be missed yet it sparks something deep inside both of you. You pull away to gaze at Luffy expectantly, as if afraid you had overstepped only to be met with twinkling eyes and a happy face. The butterflies in your stomach go wild once again but now they push you to kiss him again with more confidence and intention and Luffy welcomes it gladly, almost too grateful

“This is so fun, keep doing it!” He states between smiles and laughter that make you beam- “But only do it to me”

As if you were to love anyone else like this

Masterlist

[kaleidescope-writes]

"So that's where you are..."

Din Djarin x reader

18+, Minors DNI

Tags: Established relationship, swearing, protective!Din, No use of Y/N, no mention of the show's plot, mention of violence, Din's sexy ass voice, year long wait

Pretty sure I missed something, if I did lemme know!

Should I make a part 2?

You knew this was a bad idea. You knew this wasn't going to end well. But you were too far in to stop now. You'd been traveling with the infamous Mandalorian for months, looking for jobs and trying to keep the little green monster safe. It's been rough for the three of you, especially since many of the available jobs would compromise the three of you and put Grogu in inescapable harm. "There are more jobs out there, safer jobs." Din would say. But none of them would pay half as much as those he deemed "too risky." Not only that, they were scarce throughout the Galaxy. Every planet you landed on only had a few jobs Din was willing to take.

It was funny to you. Before Grogu came along, the last thing on his mind when taking a job was whether it was too dangerous. You'd often have to scold him for caring so little about his own safety, claiming he had no sense of self-preservation. Grogu changed that. Grogu was his wake-up call. Now he cares more about the safety of all three of you than how many credits the job offered. You were struggling to buy provisions and keep the Razor Crest in good shape. Peli was a big help, giving you a discounted price on repairs, but it still wasn't enough sometimes. Sometimes you had to scrape the bottom of the barrel just to have enough rations to make it to the next job. Despite wanting to stay optimistic, you knew you couldn't keep this up, it wasn't practical. You had a few conversations with Din about your concerns, but he kept reassuring you that it was fine. "Yours and Grogu's safety is what matters the most. We'll find other jobs, but I can't let anything happen to either of you." But that wasn't enough to make your worries dissipate. You still didn't have enough credits to buy the supplies you desperately needed.

That's what brought you here. You told Din that you were going into the next town over to try to find cheaper supplies for your travels while he took the next job. You hated having to lie to him, but it was getting harder to get by. The last time you visited Peli, you bargained asked for a favor. You asked her to send one of the droid-piloted ships in her possession to the next planet you were headed to, in exchange for a portion of the credits you'd get. You then had it take you to a different planet in the solar system, one you knew you could find one of the jobs Din refused to take. So here you were, waiting in an isolated corner of one of the grime-filled, crowded bars that bounty hunters frequented. You were looking for the zabrak that had offered Din the job a few days prior. He'd said that it was about killing a mercenary that had double crossed him a few months back. They weren't exactly well-known, but they'd made enough of a name for themselves in the underground for other hunters to stay away. Din said he could've taken care of it, but the only thing that stopped his was the very thing you were tired of hearing about. You knew you could handle it. Din had trained you well enough to take a job like this yourself, but he never really gave you the chance to prove it. You didn't need to. He would always be there to make sure you didn't. But now you had to.

A chirping noise coming from your belt pulled you out of your thoughts. Pulling out your holoprojector, you started to feel uneasy. You'd been gone for hours, he definitely noticed by now. As reluctant as you were, you knew that if you didn't respond, he would be absolutely mad with worry. Despite trying to get the job done as secretively as possible, you knew that worrying him would make it harder for him to understand why you decided to ignore his wishes for you to stay safe and stay near him. You knew you had to answer. The moment the hologram took the form of his helmet, the pressure in your stomach became harder to ignore. "Where are you?" His deep, modulated voice asked. You debated continuing the lie you previously used to leave his side, but the way he tilted his head towards you served as a warning against it. "I came looking for another job," you replied bluntly, "We need more than a few credits to get by this time." A deep exhale sounded through the hologram, he was upset. "You weren't in the next town over, I looked for you in every shit hole bar I could find. Where are you?" he asked more sternly He knew you'd gone farther than that, there was no doubt in his mind. That didn't deter you from accomplishing your original purpose here. You needed the supplies. That was something even he couldn't deny anymore. "Looking for another job," you repeated, knowing he wasn't going to stop asking, "I'll go back when I'm done, I just need you to be patient."

"Cyar'ika, tell me where you are. I'll pick you up and we can find a job together," Din tried, his voice easing up a bit as he spoke. Your stomach churned more, preparing another avoidant response. "Ah, there you are!" A very distinct familiar voice called over the noise of the crowd of drunkards, "You changed your mind then? You'll take the job?" Approaching your secluded corner of the bar, the zabrak you were looking for announced his presence out enough to be heard by your concerned lover. You felt your heart drop to your knees, knowing damn well Din would recognize the shrill, raspy voice of the man that had previously offered him the job. You turned your attention back to the holoprojector in your hand, attempting to end the projection before he'd fully realize where you were. But you weren't fast enough, as a deep hum resounded from his image followed by a sentence that would upturn your anxiety.

"So that's where you are."

*********************************************

A/N: Heyo! I know it's been almost a year since I posted the preview, sorry for the delay. Also, I meant to make this longer, but I figured if anyone wants to read more I can make a part 2. Love you guys, stay safe, stay proud, stay strong! 💖

Also, if my irl friends find this, not you fucking didn't 🫵😠

[yannaryartside]

Carmy will have to decide between two types of love

I keep thinking about why Carmy (possibly) deciding between Claire and Syd is taking so much time on the overall plot of the series. We have used a entire season of him falling for Claire, and my theory is that in this season the Syd vs Claire is gonna be toe to toe, and then in the final season he goes for Syd.

Now, if that happens this way, I have been analysing it from a writers perspectives, how this love stories create Carmen ultimate character arc. I am gonna propose to you two narratives and why I would go for the later. Character analysis ahead.

The Claire option

Walk with me here. If you ship Claire and Carmy and believe the trailers, you could say this whole thing is about Carmy learning to accept love and good things. That is why the last season ended with him rejecting the relationship out of trauma just to realize that Claire loved him. This season could be about him healing to a point where he learns he deserves love, apologizing to Claire, and getting back together. And you know what, that does make sense, writing this show as an exercise for learning to heal childhood wounds. It is clean and makes sense. Then in s4 his new self can make all the good decisions, have a couple of kids, bum you have an arc.

But the background noise, or the clues floating around, to call it something, doesn't make sense. Here insert all the Sydcarmy clues the fandom has talked about.

The show is trying to tell us that Claire is the love Carmy wants because he is trapped in his wounded self mentality.

As I said in this post, Claire's behavior looked extremely naive but manipulative sometimes. Her relationship with his family and the trauma surrounding it. How everybody seems more enthusiastic than him about the relationship at times.

The reason: the wound.

Claire is uncomplicated love, love with no expectations or boundaries, with only space for his needs, never hers. That is the kind of love a child expects from a parent. My theory is that Carmen, being with Claire, wanted to experience that kind of love, the one he didn't get from Donna. with a touch of his teen self fantasies and sex included.

And that also makes sense. Everybody that has been abused, particularly in childhood, will tell you that picking a partner without relying on your wounded self is very difficult.

A little bit of TMI on healing from abuse when you look for a romantic partner: One of the reasons I got into therapy is because I was terrified to end up marrying a man as abusive as my dad was with my mom and me. I had a problematic episode with one of my exboyfriends that made me realize I was repeating specific patterns, even when consciously, I thought I was picking men who didn't act like my father. It is something difficult precisely because you are not aware of it. It is all happening subconsciously.

So maybe that is why the writers want to give Carmen the chance to choose a partner as a healed person (Syd) and not as a wounded person desperate for love (Claire)

You cannot choose a romantic partner looking for the love of a parent, because parent to child love is the only type of unconditional love that can exist. Some therapist will tell you that the only way to cure that lack is with self love and forgiveness, but that is besides the point of this post.

Romantic relationships cannot be unconditional, it is a partnership. There needs to be expectations of grow, sacrifices and compromises, the two people need to get their needs met. You may heal together, but you partner may trigger your wounds sometimes, the same as your other relationships.

Syd definitely forces Carmy to evolve, while Claire enables him and keeps him in his past self.

Now here is where I think the twist of the series will come.

Remember when I said that Carmys core wound is ther he felt he was not good enough for Donna to love him? Because he could not be like Michael? This is the post

Syd is Carmy’s anchor and his peace. She is also characterized as someone who helps people to grow, who gives grace and sincerity when mistakes are made. She is the actually healthy woman/parent he never experienced.

Carmen has not healed his core wound. The lie he believes that he has to go the extra mile to earn people's love. The way he became the best chef in the world, dreaming of just getting a “good job” from his older brother.

But because his wounded self doesn't feel like he can be enough for somebody he actually wants (Syd), he felt for a woman that didn't asked anything of him (Claire).

That (never giving but always receiving) dynamic is what allowed Carmy to accept the relationship in the first place.

Thinking of all this made me realize that not only has Syd been the only person Carmy had chosen for himself (as other posts have brilliantly pointed out), but Syd is literally the only person who can make a relationship with him work. She had seen the worst of him (Donna) and had the capacity to make him think of himself beyound all that, hence the peace that she brings him “you are the best cdc” as in “you are great, you are good, a good partner, a good leader, you are my friend” you are not just the bear (your wounded self). He smiles because the person that he wants can see this even if he doesn't dare to belive it yet.

So I don't know how they could make Carmy realize all of this. I also could be wrong and the meaning of all of this could be something completly different. I also don't know of this opinion is controversial. Let me know what you think. Thank you for reading.

[alittledizzy]

this a big ask and feel free to ignore but you seem like the right person to come to.

can you give like a dnf overview for those of us who know almost nothing but are sooo curious (minecraft? face reveal? queer?)(i follow for dnp lol)

Okay so... I'm gonna try and do a bullet point overview and for the purpose of not getting in the weeds I am not going into the controversies. I'll be happy to discuss that part - OFF anon.

Dream and George met on a Minecraft server when Dream was 16, George was 18/19 and became best friends.

When Dream decided to start youtube when he was 18, he asked George (and Sapnap) to come along with him. They both said yes.

In 2019, George started talking about moving to America. At the time Dream lived with his girlfriend, though they broke up by 2020. (George and the girlfriend did not get along. But that's also a whole other can of worms because she fucked Dream up pretty badly with consistent cheating and verbal/physical abuse.)

Plans for George to move to the US got more concrete and at some point over 2021 became him moving into a house with Dream and Sapnap.

Dream also came out multiple times in this general period of time. He came out in a post on reddit, on twitter, and on a stream. He does not explicitly state that he's bisexual, but he does explicitly state he isn't straight.

Sapnap had already moved in with Dream for Dream's protection since he was being swatted pretty regularly. Dream had plans for a face reveal but people were stalking and harassing him both to 'reveal' him and also because at this point the Kiwi Farms targeted attack on him had gained a lot of steam.

Speaking of: George used face cam pretty regularly, but Dream did not face reveal. Based on things he's said it seems pretty clear he was trying to lose weight but at some point set the goal of face revealing once George was in America because he wanted George to see his face before anyone else.

George applied for his Visa and would have had about a 6-9 month wait, and then was denied. He had to apply a second time, and wait another extended period of time, which put it September 2022 when his visa finally was approved. This means they'd known each other for seven years and he'd been trying to move to the US to live with Dream for three years at that point.

George arrived in the US and Dream posted his first video with a face camera on. George posted a vlog meeting Dream irl for the first time, which is a great starting point for a watch.

In terms of the ship stuff: they've always had a heavily flirtatious relationship and Dream is open about how attractive he finds George. They've acknowledging having a conversation about if they'd date or not.

Once in a while Dream will reiterate that they're not dating, and we know he spent 2023 having a variety of hookups but no confirmed relationships. (Which lines up with his long history of women that flirt with him complaining he'll be great to them and make them feel good but always says he doesn't want a relationship.)

2023 was pretty wild for them in terms of nonstop travel, events, and making very little content besides Dream's music. So far in 2024 we've seen a complete 180 of that and Dream and George have noy traveled at all, staying at home in Orlando together. (Sapnap has traveled and spent time in LA, but alone.)

This is partially due to controversy, I'm sure, but also seems to be just in line with a rededicating of themselves to Minecraft and content impending. They're working on a project that hopefully will come out soon.

Right now in terms of what they've publicly told us, they're just in the category of Super Not Normal About Each Other. Here are a few of the Not Normal things that are just fun from a shippy pov:

Before George moved, they were open about living most of their life on a call together. This includes sleep calling and staying on the phone while taking showers.

One of Dream's early videos was gifting his friends money to thank them for supporting him. He gave Sapnap and another friend $500 each. He gave George $5000.

Dream took 'am I in love with my best friend' quizzes on stream twice with George on the call and neither treated it quite like a joke.

Dream sent George an oversized Dream hoodie which George has worn repeatedly and even admitted to spraying with cologne before he'd put it on. Dream took pictures of George in the hoodie (a private call, not one fans were in on) and then later shared them saying they were the cutest pictures of George ever.

The first time we really got to see them interact irl at length was a stream they did around Christmas. Here's a supercut that just really shows the vibe between them.

Initially in late 2022 Dream was wearing a very specific chain. At some point in January 2023, George started wearing that chain (the specific one Dream used to wear) and has not been spotted without it since.

At one of his concerts Dream described George as a friend he just met a year ago that he's so in love with.

The entire song Spotlight which everyone immediately associated with George, to George's embarrassment and pride.

And there's obviously way more... but I feel like this is a good starter kit for Them.

[abiatackerman]

Frosty night, Warm embraces

You look at the receptionist with disbelief as she says they have only one free room left in their cottage.

And that contains one bed.

Due to the heavy snowfall, the roads are blocked and a lot of people got stuck midway. Even though Erwin booked two rooms for Levi and you but due to high pressure of the helpless people who got stuck because of the Snowfall, the manager gave one of the rooms to another couple.

"Do something!"

You say to Levi who's standing beside you as always with a blank expression on his face. He has been silent most of the conversation with the receptionist, his expression stoic and uninterested. He glances at you with a slight frown, crossing his arms over his chest.

"And what exactly do you expect me to do?"

He asks, keeping his voice neutral, as if the idea of sharing a room wasn't affecting him at all. You glare at him.

"Who told you to come with me? I was fine on my own. If you wouldn't have come... This problem wouldn't have occurred in the first place. Also that Erwin... 'Let Levi accompany you.' my ass."

You say in an angry tone as you look at the receptionist who's looking at you with horror.

Of course because you're cursing at the commander of the survey corps and yelling at humanity's strongest soldier.

"Watch your tone, doll."

He warns, his voice is low and stern. His expression is slightly amused, but he won't admit it.

"I came with you to make sure you stay out of trouble. And here you are, causing a scene, like always."

"Give me the key."

You say to the receptionist, ignoring Levi.

"I'm so tired. I'll just shower and sleep. At least you guys have warm water in your bathrooms, right?"

The receptionist flinches at your outburst but quickly composes herself.

"Yes, ma'am. We do have warm water."

She says, offering you a sympathetic smile before handing you the key. Taking the key you walk towards the room and as you two are out of the sight of the receptionist, you smack Levi's arm.

"What's your problem? Why did you call me doll in front of that damn receptionist?"

"Because you're a doll. Small, cute, and fragile."

He says nonchalantly, unaffected by the smack of your arm. Though there is an underlying hint of possessiveness in his tone. You take a deep breath to calm yourself.

First of all you had to serve a lot of people today who were hurt due to the fall of the wall of the Trost district. Second, the extreme snowfalls. Third, getting stuck with this arrogant asshole named Levi... You're totally losing your temper.

Though no one can deny the fact that your relationship is different. Like Levi would tease you, insult you but he would even let you hit him too (which no one can imagine) and will call you doll in front of anyone he wants.

Everyone ships you two, but you or Levi never react to those things. Though you both know Levi's whipped over you.

Levi observes your frustration and takes note of your attempts to steady your breathing. His expression is blank but his voice softens.

"You always get so dramatic when you're tired."

You open the door as you throw your bag in the bed and start to pull out your night gown and ignore Levi's statement.

"You're sleeping on the floor."

Levi raises an eyebrow at your declaration, crossing his arms over his chest.

"We're sharing the bed, doll."

Levi says, his tone leaving no room for argument. He's not missing the chance of sleeping in the same bed, together with you.

"I'm going to take a shower."

You say ignoring him, as you get into the bathroom and Levi "Tch"s at your obvious attempt to escape the ongoing debate.

"Don’t take too long. I'll shower too."

He says, his voice carrying through the closed bathroom door.

You come out of the shower after a while with damped hair and in a night gown, shivering. You immediately jump into the bed without looking at Levi and cuddle with the blanket, trying to make yourself warm. Your toes and fingers are cold as ice.

“You look like a damn frozen stick.”

Levi's voice is laced with a hint of playful sarcasm. He shifts closer to you on the bed, his body gently pressing against yours as he notices how cold you are

"Go take a shower. You stink."

You lie, kicking his leg as he hugs you and Levi dodges your kick with ease.

"You're the one who smells like a damn flower shop."

He retorts and stands up, giving you a quick glance before disappearing into the bathroom.

Levi takes a quick shower, the warm water cascades over his tense muscles, easing away the stress of the day. He thinks about you, lying in the bed just outside the bathroom door, wrapped in a blanket and shivering. He quickly dries off and wraps a towel around his waist, walking out of the bathroom. The towel around his waist making him look even more tempting. He looks at you, wrapped in the blankets, still shivering.

Levi walks over to the bed, after wearing a trouser and sits on the bed. He reaches out and gently touches your arm. Your skin is soft and cold.

"You're shivering, doll."

Levi says softly.

"It's just.... Too cold here."

You mumble, shaking. Seeing the shivers racking through your body and your teeth chattering softly he scoots closer to you.

"It's alright, doll."

He whispers, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you closer to him. He nuzzles his face into your hair, breathing in the fresh, floral scent that clinging to you. You gasp but don't protest when he hugs you. He pulls the blanket over you two and you sigh in comfort of his warmth.

"You're safe now. I've got you."

Levi says softly as you press your face against his neck and sigh feeling his manly, strong smell.

"Why your chest... I mean your body is so warm? Is it because you have much more blood than me or because you eat more than me?"

Levi chuckles softly at your question, his hand rubbing gentle circles on your back as he holds you close to his chest.

"It's probably a combination of both. Also, I work out more than you do."

He says, his voice rumbling deep in his chest. He can feel the coldness of your skin slowly fading away as his body heat transfers to you.

"Yeah, right."

You say as you hug him.

"But my cold body isn't making you feel uncomfortable. Weird.

Levi's eyes gleam with amusement as you hugged him tighter. He finds it strangely endearing.

"What's so weird about that? I'm used to your cold body. I've come to expect it."

He jokes, his hand continuing to rub soothing circles on your back.

"You know? You talk a lot when you're with me. Unnecessarily. Also I lied when I said you stink."

You say as I close your eyes and Levi chuckles. He knows that he usually keeps his words to a minimum and speaks only when necessary. But somehow, being around you makes him loosen up a little bit more.

"So, you like how I smell?"

He teases, his voice dripping with cocky confidence making you laugh.

"Shut up."

You mumble as you hug him tighter.

"Well... It's refreshing to see you acting differently around me. More friendly and more comfortable. I'm proud I can make you feel like that."

Levi smiles, his body relaxing as you hug him tighter. He can't deny that he's enjoying this... The two of you cuddled together under the blankets, engaged in a conversation.

"Yeah, yeah. Don't get used to it. I still have a reputation to uphold, doll."

He knows he is different when he is around you. But still... He's the captain of the survey corps.

"Thank you."

Levi looks at you as you mumble, admiring the way your face looks so close to his. You both are laying on the same pillow, your head just beside his. He can feel your breath on his skin.

"What are you thanking me for, doll?"

He whispers, his eyes meeting your gaze. The intimate position of your faces so close together makes his heart skip a beat.

"For warming me up. Idiot."

You chuckle and Levi fakes a scoff. Though his heart is warmed by your simple gratitude.

"Yeah, yeah. That's why I'm here for, doll. To be your personal heater whenever it's cold."

He retorts making you laugh, his hand still rubbing gentle circles on your back under the blankets.

"You know? No matter how annoying you are...."

You say as your eyes soften.

"I don't mind being stuck with you."

Levi lifts his hand and gently tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, his touch soft and tender.

"Annoying, huh? Is that the only way you can describe me?"

He teases, though he secretly relishes the fact that you don't mind being stuck with him despite his abrasive exterior.

You smile and press a soft kiss on his forehead.

"That's a secret, for now go to sleep. Good night."

Levi's eyes widened slightly when he feels your soft kiss on his forehead. The unexpected gesture of tenderness  catches him off guard and his heart skips a beat.

He wraps his arm around your waist as you roll over, showing him your back. He can feel your back pressed against his chest, and it feels shockingly intimate.

"Good night, doll."

He whispers before closing his eyes, feeling sleep tugging him too.

[newwritergirl]

Starting over | Part 19

Materlist

Summary: The pilots are finally on their way back home. Y/n can't wait to finally have Bradley and Jake back for good. But a looming shadow is out there to destroy everything, to destroy her.

Trigger warnings: 18+, Minors DNI, attempt SA, violence against women, blood, injuries, throwing up, language

A/N: This chapter is really heavy, please read the warnings!!! Thanks for the support :)

Word Count:4.2k +

Two weeks. It is Monday and Bradley and Jake are gone for two weeks now. Both aviators dearly miss their girlfriend and with not being able to contact her in any way their yearning increased every day they stayed on the carrier. But to be honest, at least they have themselves. Y/n on the other hand was alone. Okay, not really alone, she has Bob and Javy back home but Hangman and Rooster suppose that her nights alone must have been really lonely for the young woman. They just hope that everything is okay back home, that their girlfriend his healthy, physically as well as mentally.

"Lieutenant Commanders, take a seat!" The Commander of the aircraft carrier sits at his small desk in the belly of the big Navy ship.

"First of all I want to thank you for your good work the last two weeks. As you know we are on our way back to the mainland which means that you will leave us." The Commander tells them. They already know that their deployment is finally over and that they will be back home in the next hours. Thank God. Both aviators can't wait to see their girl shortly.

After the last meeting with the commanding officer of the aircraft carrier they start to pack their bags and literally count the last hours on the cramped ship.

---

To say Monday started crazy was an understatement. The whole datacenter of the Navy base had failed and y/n tried her best to keep the damage at bay. She had countless phone calls with It-support members of other Navy bases but even in the late afternoon she knows that she has to stay much longer to get everything back on track.

"You're still here, sunshine?! What happened to make it a short Monday?" Bob says when he steps into her office. He just ended the flight training with Javy and the recruits and had a short talk with Mav. Fortunately the older man told him that he banned Welsh from the base and gave him an arduous task to do at home. Evaluating flight data is the perfect assignment to do from home and to make it even harder to take for Welsh, Mav called him numerous times during the day to check how much he really worked at home. He just hoped he can keep up the charade until the Admiral is back in some days.

"Hey Bobby. What can I say, I wanted to stick to the plan, but then the whole datacenter broke down. I'm still trying to save some lost data. Probably until midnight…" Y/n says with an exhausted sigh. She was more than tired but she can't just leave for the night when she knows that her task is not finished yet.

"Ehm…did you hear something from Jake and Bradley? I mean, did Maverick tell you something?" The young woman looks up from her computer and into the warm eyes of her aviator friend.

"Hey. What's that sad look, sunshine. It's already two weeks. They will be back soon, believe me. Mav just mentioned that there was no message that their deployment will be extended. So I guess you will hear from them in the next days." Bob tries to reassure her. Unfortunately the pilots were not able to contact their friends and family back home to tell them they're on their way back, so it will probably be a huge surprise when they step into the base tomorrow.

"Okay, that's good news, isn't it? They will not be away for more weeks?" Y/n asks hesitantly. She doesn't want to come across too desperate but after the Welsh disaster she is more than ready for her boyfriends to be back home. The feeling of being unsafe and watched just increased over the last days even when she stayed the weekend with Robert.

Bob takes a step around y/n's desk and squeezes her shoulder softly. "No, in that case the Commander of the carrier would've messaged Mav or the Admiral. After all we are short staffed because Nat, Rooster and Hangman are away."

---

Bob left shortly after y/n reassured him that he can leave her alone. She doesn't want keep him any longer at base and she drove herself to work so there's no reason for Bob to stay any longer at work than necessary. Of course she has a bad feeling in the back of her mind but she tries to keep her panic and bad feelings at bay. She is a grown woman, she has to stay strong for God's sake.

The vibration of her mobile which lays beside her on her desk makes her flinch. The last days she didn't receive any anonymous messages but the bad feeling lingers still in her mind. She hesitantly grabs her phone but lets out a sigh of relief when she sees the sender of the message:

Pete Mitchell: Hello y/n, I hope you're already at home and not still at base. Please don't stress yourself over the lost data… Well I have good news, I just got an Email from the Commanding Officer of the USS Harry Truman and told me, that Rooster, Hangman and Phoenix will be back home tomorrow.

She can't believe her eyes and read the text more than three times. Jake and Bradley are coming back tomorrow?

Y/n: Hello Mav, thank you so much. That are really good news. And yes I'm still at base but I'm almost finished with saving the data.

Pete Mitchell: Y/n, please go home. We don't want you overworked or getting sick from the stress. Please go home!

Y/n: Yes Sir! Thank you for the good news. See you tomorrow. Tell Penny I say 'hi'!

Pete Mitchell: Of course. Good night!

They're really coming back. A warm feeling is spreading through her body. The painful feeling of loneliness and missing her boys is finally over. The young woman decides to call it a night to be somewhat rested when Jake and Bradley come back tomorrow. She can't help herself but imagine finally sleeping with them in one of their beds again. Their warm bodies caging her in a blanket of love and warmth. Y/n smiled to herself as she starts to pack her bag and shutting off her computer for the day when a loud bang startles her.

She knows this noise, it's the metal door of the back entrance of the office building. She absolutely hates it when someone bangs the heavy door it always startles her when she's deep in thought during work. But now it's different. It's too late for someone being at the office building, Mav, Javy and Bob are already at home and the Admiral is still at the conference. Her heart starts to beat a bit faster when she thinks about the person who enters the office building that late in the evening. Could it be a recruit who forgot something and just came back? Or it's Bob looking after her and wants to give her a lecture that she's still at work. Y/n hurries and shoves all her stuff in her bag but she lets out a shriek when her office door suddenly opens with a bang, hitting the wall.

Her eyes widen in surprise and fear.

"Hello, darling. I knew you would be here when I checked your home and this pile of junk of a car was not there" The man kicks the door shut and steps closer to her. Y/n stands behind her desk frozen in shock. What is he doing here? He is not supposed to be here.

"Cat got your tongue? You're getting ruder, darling. Not talking to me… bawling your eyes out and playing the damsel in distress for Maverick… You know what happened?"

Welsh rounds the desk, making y/n back away but there's no way she can go, her back is nearly at the wall behind her. The young woman's body starts to shake, she feels like a small animal cornered by her biggest enemy. She looks at the ground not daring to look the man in front her in the eyes.

"ANSWER ME!" Daniel screams and now stands so close to y/n, nearly toe to toe, making her jump. Big hands are shoving her shoulders, her back hitting the wall painfully behind her. Fortunately she can prevent her head from making contact with the wall. She needs a clear head, she needs to form a plan to escape before the man in front of her escalates further. Y/n knows that she has to look up and talk to him. Her ex always escalated when she stayed silent and didn't look at him. She slowly lifts her head. An ugly smile is spreading on Welsh's face when her gaze lands on his face. She can feel her whole body shaking like the temperature fell under the freezing point. The man takes another step closer if this is even possible and grabs y/n's chin painfully in one of his hands, squeezing and lifting her face further. His face is so close to hers that she can smell and feel his hot breath.

"Please…" An almost inaudible plea tumbles out of her mouth. She pinches her eyes shut. This has to be a dream. Maybe she fell asleep at her desk or even at home in one of the boys' beds. This can't be happening to her, not again.

"Oh she actually can talk." Welsh laughs into her face his tight grip on her face never loosening. "So, I like my women polite and 'please' is just the right start."

A tear is making down the way over her cheek. Y/n feels the blood rushing in her ears and her heart painfully hammering in her ribcage. Her body is in escape mode. She needs to flight out of this situation but she feels like she's glued to the spot. Where could she even go? The bigger man in front of her has her in an iron grip and is blocking her way with his whole body caging her against the wall behind her.

"Darling, why the crocodile tears? I know you want it just as much…" He licks over her right cheek, tasting her salty tear.

With all her strength she tries to shove Welsh away from her. Bile is creeping up her throat after she felt his tongue licking over her cheek. She catches him by surprise when she pushes him away and he stumbles a step backwards. But before she can make a beeline to escape his looming shadow he pushes her forcefully against the wall. This time she has no chance to catch herself and her head bangs painfully against the wall, leaving her dazed and with a ringing in her ears. Before she can get her bearings back a big hand is squeezing her throat and keeping her once more in place.

"Always playing hard to get, but at home you're fucking two Navy men." He squeezes a bit harder, his rage clearly audible in his voice. Y/n struggles for breath, scratching at the man's hands which have her in a bruising grasp. So he clearly knows that she is in a relationship with Jake and Bradley. But y/n couldn't care less, in that moment she just tries to fight for her life. When her eyes start to roll back into her head due to oxygen deprivation Welsh loosens his tight grip he has around her throat.

"Oh no, darling. We are not going to sleep." And with a hard slap to her face he brings her back to reality. Her head flies to the side and she instantly feels her cheek bruising and her head ringing. The taste of iron is spreading in her mouth. His loosening hand makes her sputter for air. With painful gasps she tries to get as much oxygen in her lungs. She is not a stranger to pain and no stranger to these situations. The huge amount of pain she already has endured is enough to fill more than only one life. Here she is again, at the hands of a monster with no way to escape.

"You really have a thing for pilots, don't you? But these cowards you have at home… now you have a real man here. Did they fuck you here at base? I bet not…" Welsh grabs her painfully strong at her shoulders to maneuver her to her desk but y/n kicks out her legs and smashes her smaller fists into his chest.

"You fucking bitch…" The man gets more furious with the woman fighting back. He tosses her smaller body with so much force that her forehead ends up on the wooden desk with a loud crack and she stays face down on the furniture she worked at only minutes ago. The already lingering pain in her head only increasing with the huge force her head cracked on the wood. A small puddle of blood is already forming under her head. It feels like her head is on fire shrouded in blanket of painful fog. A loud cry is piercing through her office when she feels Welsh's fist connecting to her lower back. She must've blacked out from the pain in her kidney where his punch was placed strategically. He grabs a fistful of her hair when he bends over the small woman laying on the hardwood desk, whispering into her right ear. "I prefer sluts like you six feet under, but I'm really happy that Michael was too dumb to finish what he started. I think you have potential to become a good little pet." His hot breath makes her shudder.

He knows everything of her, he knows her past, her pain and her traumas. And he's using it against her now. His words make her head spin even more and she closes her eyes to ease the severe dizziness. She's sure that she has a concussion and now and also some damage to her lower back and at worst to her damaged kidney too. With a sudden shove he flips y/n on her back and his hand is instantly back around her throat keeping her in place. The young woman is almost certain that she's not going to survive this evening. She sees the pure rage and hate in the eyes of the man towering above her, holding her in the laying position on her desk.

Welsh is satisfied when he sees the blood dripping down y/n's face and her bruised cheek where he slapped her earlier. 

"You know y/n y/ln, the first time I saw your cute ass and beautiful face I just knew that you were a slut." Welsh steps between her legs. With all her strength the woman tries to shut her legs but still dazed and oxygen deprived she can't seem to have the slightest chance against the evil man.

"Such a good body…" Daniel loosens his grip around her throat making her sputter again for air. His hands wander down her body, stroking over arms. The hot touch of his big hands make her shudder. It's nothing compared to the loving touch of her two boyfriends. His touch feels dangerous, painful and absolutely disgusting. His hands stroking up and down her shaking arms, he clearly enjoys y/n's desperate look and the tears streaming down her face. He grabs the collar of her white blouse and with one forceful pull he ribs it open, exposing her heaving chest.

"STOP!" Y/n screams and tries to punch the man with her fist. She can catch him in his face with her fist but unfortunately not strong enough to cause any damage.

Her attempt to fight him makes him only more furious and another hard slap lands on her already bruised face, this time catching her higher near her eye.

"You fucking bitch…" His other fist lands a painful punch on her side. She is sure he cracked some of her ribs. Gasping for breath and whimpering y/n whishes Michael had killed her years ago but images of her boyfriends come to her mind. The countless happy moments, their warm embraces, their strong but not dangerous holds they had on her during the night. She needs to fight. She needs to fight to come back to them. She doesn't want to be a victim and sure as hell she doesn't want Welsh to kill her.

With one of her hands she searches for the heavy paperweight she has on her desk. Jake and Bradley gave it to her last year for her birthday. It's shaped like a plane and made of bronze. Both were so proud that they found that useless thing on a junk market. Her fingertips touch the cold metal figure but she is not close enough to grab it and bring it into her hand. When she hears a zipper being pulled down she looks up and sees Welsh opening his trousers. It's now or never. She stretches her arm a bit ignoring the pain in her back and her ribcage where her ribs are probably broken. But it's still not enough to embrace her chosen weapon with her small hand. With another glimpse at the man towering over her she sees him distracted, fumbling with his crotch and his briefs. She has to act fast otherwise he steals the last spark of dignity from her. With a sudden move she raises one of her legs and kicks as hard as she can, hitting Welsh directly into his crotch. With a loud scream he scrambles back. Distracted from the pain in his private parts y/n is finally able to get the paperweight from her desk. In a daze, like she's observing the whole scenario like a bystander, she pushes herself up from her laying position on her desk and smashes the bronze figure on Daniel's head. With a loud thud he falls to the ground, his hands still holding his crotch. Y/n is out of breath, her lungs painfully squeezing themselves but she has no time to catch her breath she needs to run. She can't wait for Welsh to come to and grabbing her again. The young woman holds her hand to her broken ribs and with her other hand she fists her bag and stumbles in the direction of the closed office door.

---

 The drive home in Bradley's Bronco was a blur for y/n. She doesn't even know how she got to the parking lot and when she recognizes the driveway of their shared home it's more than a miracle that she was really able to get there without crashing the car. The Bronco comes to an abrupt stop, standing in y/n's beloved rose bed in their front yard with one tire. During the whole drive she didn't seem to feel the majority of the pain but now stumbling out of then car she cries out when she strains her back too much. Welsh punched her really heavy into her damaged kidney and now she's certain that at least some of her ribs are broken. Breathing is getting more difficult and her heart doesn't seem to stop racing when she fumbles with the keys to unlock the front door. Tears are blurring her vision, the concussion is making her head swim more and the dizziness makes it nearly impossible to take a steady step into the house when she's finally able to open the door. After locking the door behind her she stumbles into her bedroom, not bothering to turn on the light. It's already dark outside but y/n has no idea what time it is. For how long did Welsh assaulted her? Minutes, hours? Is it still evening or already night? The clock on her night table reads 11:56 pm but the whites spots dancing in front of her eyes make it impossible for her to see properly. Her hands are still shaking badly but she manages to lock her bedroom door. Too afraid that Welsh is looking for her and tries to break into their house. She stumbles further into her bedroom but on the way to her bathroom her knees give out and with a painful thud she falls to the floor. A heart wrenching sob escapes her throat. She still feels Welsh's hands chocking her until she was on the verge of unconsciousness, his hot disgusting touch roaming over her arms before he ripped her blouse. She feels the nausea coming back. Y/n knows she needs to throw up in the next minutes so she crawls the rest of the way into her bathroom and finally empties her stomach into the toilet in front of her. The heaves are painful and it feels like it's ripping her broken ribs apart further. Her heartbeat is painfully hammering in her head.

With a shaking hand she wipes the cold sweat from her forehead. A searing pain makes her hand withdrawal from her head and another loud sob is heard in the bathroom when she sees her bloody hand coming back from her forehead. She's bleeding. Y/n remembers now how hard she banged her head on her desk when Welsh pushed her forcefully. In trance she looks at her trembling bloody hand, pictures of the recent abuse of the evil navy pilot dancing in front of her eyes, tears falling into her lap. Her gaze lands on her ripped blouse and despite the shock she has another reality sinking in: He tried to rape her. He ripped her blouse, he was ready to hurt her further, he already pulled his zipper down, ready to attack.

No longer strong enough to hold her aching body up she lets herself sink onto the cold tiles of the bathroom, weeping breathlessly. The cold tiles which are pressing against her cheek are soothing the pain she feels in her head.

---

Y/n doesn't know how she rested on the cold floor, neither does she know if she passed out or just fell asleep out of exhaustion. She slowly blinks her eyes open and is instantly greeted with pain. Her whole body feels like she is on fire, burning from the inside. She once more is aware of the blood on her hands and her chest. Her head wound must've bled more when she was unconscious.

Y/n sheds her ripped blouse from her shoulders, getting rid of one of the evidences that what happened to her earlier wasn't a painful dream. She looks down at her upper body. Huge hand shaped bruises littering her shoulders and arms. She still feels his disgusting touch so she crawls over to her shower and tries to get into a standing position. The young woman wants to wash away his touch, her blood, she wants to wash away the whole attack.

"J-Jake…Braad…" she whispers to no one. She knows that she needs help, probably medical attention. Y/n needs her boyfriends.

On shaky legs she stumbles into the shower and turns on the water before she slumps down again in too much agony to stay standing any longer. The warm spray of water soothing her tense muscles but the pain stays in her body like a bad omen. When the spray finally hits her head the water is slowly turning crimson, washing away some of the remains of the recent events.

Y/n stays in the shower until the water is slowly turning cold and she starts to shake violently, now from the ice cold water and not only from the shock of the events.

When she finally succeeds to turn off the spray of water she crawls out of the wet shower and wraps herself into her fluffy towel as best as she can.

There she is, laying on the floor shaking like a leaf in her wet underwear in only a towel, slowly slipping into unconsciousness.

---

"Bobby!" Phoenix squeals when she sees her friend in the distance.

"Hey, you're finally home." Robert embraces Nat into a tight hug. Since they're all permanent at the base stationed and instructors for new Navy pilots the Dagger Squad are a very tight knit group and these last two weeks separated once more showed them all how dearly they miss their friends when being apart.

"I wouldn't call this shithole home, Bob." Bradley grumbles but pats Bob's shoulder in a friendly manner.

"Oh come on. This base is homey, the carrier was a shit hole." Nat laughs at Rooster's bad mood and she knows for certain who pissed in his cereals. He wants nothing more than to see y/n and is more than pissed that the trip home took them a bit longer due to bad weather.

Jake squeezes the shoulder of his partner in a reassuring manner. He also can't wait to see y/n, to kiss and hug her as tight as possible.

"Come on Rooster. Let's surprise y/n. She's in her office isn't she?" The blonde aviator asks Bob when all four of them make their way towards the office building.

"I think so, it's…" Robert looks at his watch, "…already 0930. Didn't have the chance to see her today. The crabs were eating our nerves today. You owe us, me and Javy." The younger man chuckles.

@djs8891

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[callmehere-iwillappear]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

this has been sitting in my drafts for probably months and i actually don't remember who tagged me at this point sorry </3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

26

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

168,724

3. What fandoms do you write for?

currently just rise but i've had some other fandoms i've written for in the past

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

call me here (i will appear) Use Only For Intended Purpose The Idiot's Guide to Blindfold Chess new phone who dis because i fear i'm lost (and i cannot be found again) wow big surprise(/s) all of these are rise al;jfldksjfkd

5. Do you respond to comments?

i try to but uh </3 i am not very good at it

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

ummm. probably waiting for answers, wasting time bc even if u know the comfort and healing comes there very much isn't any in the fic itself so whoops </3 i am not good at hurt/no comfort so i don't. have a lot of fics that would really qualify

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

uuhhhhh ig fibonacci? most of my fics have relatively happy endings and. this is the one with the least angst overall so

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not yet thank god

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

i do not alfjdlkjfkdls

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

imma keep it real with you chief most of the crossovers that i've written are with other people's aus and idk if that counts

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of fingers crossed

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yeesssss? sorta? it's not like, on ao3 but i've done some collab crossover stuff with friends (see aforementioned crossover question)

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

god idk. i don't do a lot of shipping these days sorry </3 i have some ships i think are cute but i'm not like, into them enough to say they really qualify

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i want to finish idiot's guide and cmh very very badly and i refuse to jinx it. idk abt npwd solely because of like the type of fic it is, idk if it'll ever be finished finished yk. like there'll always be more little scenes i can do

16. What are your writing strengths?

um. i've been told i'm good at character voice

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

sweats nervously

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i don't really do it? i probably wouldn't unless it was like, just a couple words - i don't mind too much when other ppl do it bc i have a translation extension on my laptop but i don't have many options when i'm on my phone

19. First fandom you wrote for?

doctor who........ i was like. god idek. fifteen? maybe younger i straight up don't remember <- also none of this is on ao3 this was like, back in my ff.net days and i don't think i even remember my login lmao

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

hmm hm hm. okay. probably because i fear i'm lost. just bc like... idk i'm proud of how it turned out and i'm really . idk. happy with the reception it got. i'm happy it reached people who can relate to it. and it's short enough that there's not like, enough space for there to be parts where i just have to force myself to write stuff i'm not 100% happy with to fill in the gaps. if that makes sense

tagging: You

[slotmachines-fearofgod]

i am a servant of the people and the people wanted more cody and ahsoka (YIPPIE) so here's the WIP i alluded to in my post order 66 AU brainstorm post hehe:

She found him a few months after he abandoned his post. 

She was older than he remembered. He hadn’t seen her since she was sixteen, almost two years ago. Her leaving the Jedi temple had been the last time he’d ever seen her, her small form outlined by the sun as she walked away from the only path she’d ever known. 

He and Rex had been waiting at the bottom of the stairs for their cue to go up and celebrate her return. He didn’t think he’d ever forget the look of shock and misery on Rex’s face when his vod’ika marched right past them, barely able to look them in the eyes. 

She had the same look in her eyes now that she did then. Tired but not quite defeated. On the verge of something that could take her beyond the stars or crush her beneath its foot. 

“Are you here to kill me?”

He’d hidden on Endor. It was far from his last known location and he had so many contacts courtesy of his time in the military that it had been easy to hire a ship to drop him off here. He’d had to switch vessels a few times, scrambling the codes just in case. 

“No.” 

Her sabers told a different story. They were white, not green like he remembered. Once upon a time he knew what that meant. 

Regardless of the ghosts of the past, they were drawn, held in a defensive stance. He’d seen her fight countless times, knew how fast she could move, knew that once upon a time he could’ve stood a chance, but not now. He was too old, too achey, too strained from a lifetime of giving and receiving pain. 

Ahsoka looked at him, the deep blue and stark white of her montrals standing out against the darkness that threatened to consume them both, “I wanted to see if it was true.”

“That I survived?”

“That you killed Obi-Wan Kenobi.”

Cody froze, the words like a punch to the gut. He’d heard the words repeated over and over. He’d been given a medal for his quick thinking and decisive action against the traitors of the Empire. He knew he did it. He knew.

Still, he couldn’t help but think of a smaller version of the girl in front of him, stepping off a transport fresh from Coruscant. His Jedi had been the first to welcome her, so desperately wanting another padawan, a chance to redeem himself from his failure the first time around. Cody didn’t know how many photos he himself had taken of Ahsoka flinging herself into a hug or the three of them huddled together around a battle station. 

Cody raised his head high, his blaster still safely tucked away in its holder. If death came by her hand, it would be a merciful fate. 

“I did.”

Wooley pulled the trigger. He fired the shot that sent Cody’s one and only hope tumbling down to his doom. But Cody gave the order. He knew well enough by now, after years of fighting, the responsibility lay with him. 

Besides, Wooley was long gone by now. He’d left them ten hours later in a locked room with a blaster to his head. 

“Then he’s really gone?” Ahsoka asked, a slight tilt to her head. He remembered that habit from a different lifetime. 

“Yes,” Cody said, forcing himself to remain steady. He’d delivered news of grief before, it being full of his own should make no difference this time. 

To his surprise, the glow of the sabers receded. For a moment it was just Cody and Ahsoka, both entangled in the darkness of the night on Endor, where even the stars could not pierce the thick foliage above their heads. Strange noises beckoned to them both, calls of relief from a life neither of them could believe had become their reality. 

“I thought he left me.”

Cody couldn’t see her, but he could hear the choked agony behind her words. 

“It was my fault,” he assured her.

The blue glow of a communications device appeared between them, held aloft in Ahsoka’s hand. On it stood the crisp clear vision of Obi-Wan Kenobi. 

It was almost enough to bring Cody to his knees.

“This is Master Obi-Wan Kenobi. I regret to report that both our Jedi Order and the Republic have fallen, with the dark shadow of the Empire rising to take their place. This message is a warning and a reminder for any surviving Jedi: trust in the Force. Do not return to the Temple. That time has passed, and our future is uncertain. Avoid Coruscant. Avoid detection. Be secret... but be strong. We will each be challenged: our trust, our faith, our friendships. But we must persevere and, in time, I believe a new hope will emerge. May the Force be with you, always.”

Cody felt a tear slip down his face. He knew. Somehow he’d known. He’d warned the rest, helped them get out and escape. 

“I’m sorry,” Cody croaked, his voice full of ruin, “I’m so sorry.”

Ahsoka watched him, her eyes hard and unrelenting in the blue light. She had no sympathy for him. 

“How did he get this message out if you killed him?”

Cody shook his head, his hands starting to shake, “I don’t know.”

“Where is his body?”

“We - we never found it,” air was coming to him with more and more difficulty. A hand came up to his chest, clutching at the phantom pain threatening to pulverize his heart. “The Emperor told us he had confirmation. He told us he was dead.”

“Why?” Ahsoka pressed, “Why assure you of something you could’ve found yourselves?”

Cody shook his head again, “I don’t know.”

Something was wrong with him. It had become more and more like this now that the war was done and it was just him alone with his mind. He’d hear the snap of a twig and lock down his hideout, thinking battle droids had discovered his location. He’d see his reflection in the mirror late at night on accident and jump, thinking the rest of his brothers had finally found him, that they were going to drag him back there and make him like them. 

Make him blank. Make him devoid of himself. Make him into a tool. 

“Aayla Secura,” Ahsoka began in a cold voice, her wrath turning its focus to him, “Luminara Unduli, Shaak Ti, Ki Adi Mundi, Stass Allie, Plo Koon. All dead because of your brothers.”

Bly…gods above Bly. Cody prayed he wasn’t the one. He prayed he wasn’t the one that took the shot. And Wolffe - Cody couldn’t imagine what Wolffe would’ve done. Did do upon waking. Upon experiencing that horrible moment of vertigo that the 212th had felt all together. Experiencing a single moment of tethered grief, hours delayed though it might have been. 

A noise of raw pain escaped Cody’s lips. It was wordless, not a cry or proclamation, but a tiny noise that any passersby would’ve assumed to be a wounded or hurt animal.

“My family,” Ahsoka’s voice was shaking, “I have to keep them alive. So I need to know - is Obi-Wan Kenobi’s name one I should add to my list?”

Cody squeezed his eyes shut and nodded. He knew. He knew it in his heart. If Obi-Wan Kenobi had survived, the Emperor would not have told him in person of his death. Those cold hands, unnaturally pale and scarred, would not have pressed a smooth medal of honor onto his uniform. He wouldn’t have had to hold back stuttering breaths as a coldness choked him, the knowledge that his light, his love, his one hope in this galaxy, was forever out of his reach threatening to take him under. 

And it was his fault. 

“You’re supposed to be dead,” Cody croaked, finally opening his eyes to look at Ahsoka, “An entire venator went down to make sure of it.”

Ahsoka’s face darkened, some twisted grief taking hold of her, “I know.”

Cody knew what that meant. She’d been aboard. She’d seen it go down. She’d watched them all die. All of her friends, her soldiers, the men that she ate with everyday for two and half years, the men she served with and grew alongside of. They were as much her family as the Jedi were. 

He didn’t want to ask about Rex. He didn’t want to see what it would do to either of them. 

“So what now?” Cody asked, scrambling to regain some sense of the commander in him. The version of him that could do this without a permanent tremor in his left hand, without attacks of panic and confusion, without the fog that hung over him as his now constant companion. 

Ahsoka squared her shoulders and gods she really was young, wasn't she? Just eighteen years old and here she was, throwing herself into the maw of something Cody didn’t think he’d ever fully understand. 

“Do you have somewhere we can talk?” The request threw him off guard, but he nodded and turned around. 

He was surprised when she fell into lockstep beside him. 

They were almost the same height now. 

Cody moved through the thick underbelly of the forest. He’d long since learned the pathways different prey animals took, knowing that was the safest way without cutting clear paths for his enemies to follow. Ahsoka followed him easily, her natural traits helping her move silently through the brush in a way he never could. 

They didn’t speak on their way to his shelter. Both were thrumming with questions, fears, anxieties that were best not spoken aloud where the trees could hear. They had been trained too well and for too long to do something so stupid as that. 

Cody had managed to make a small adobe style domicile. They’d taught all sorts of shelter making on Kamino and it had served him well, allowing him to dig out a small space and form a dome over top out of mud and clay that he’d already excavated. It was small, only one room, but the two of them sat comfortably. Cody got to work on the fire, waiting for Ahsoka to speak. 

“Have you ever had a brain scan done?”

Cody thought for a moment, trying to remember. 

“Probably at some point.”

“What level?”

Cody looked at her curiously, not understanding the point of this, “I’ve never had an injury that constituted anything above level 2, if that’s what you’re asking.”

Ahsoka blew out a breath, for the first time looking nervous. 

A spark caught, quickly taking to the dried grass and sticks Cody used as kindling. 

“You remember Fives.”

It wasn’t a question. They both knew Cody would never forget any of the Domino squad, not for as long as he lived.

“He was right.”

Cody looked up at Ahsoka. Her expression was serious, not that he’d expected it to be anything else.

“About what?”

Ahsoka’s hand went up to one of her lekku, before twitching and falling back to her lap. Cody knew what she’d been searching for anyway. 

“There are chips inside of your heads,” Ahsoka said slowly, “Not the behavioral ones. Another. It was meant to be activated when - when the time was right.”

Cody’s stomach dropped. 

“The Jedi didn’t betray the Republic,” Ahsoka said, “And you didn’t betray them. The Emperor took control of your heads. Order 66 was an activation code, one you couldn’t have stopped even if you wanted to.”

Cody felt like the floor had fallen out from beneath him. Judging by the look on Ahsoka’s face, he looked like it too. 

“Cody…it wasn’t your fault.”

Tears stung his eyes, threatening to fall. He knew if that happened, it wouldn’t stop, and he’d never appeared weak in front of Ahsoka before. She was a child and had already been through too much. 

His shoulders slumped, like Cody had been strung tight on a wire that was just now being cut. His whole body shook, his breaths coming in stuttering stop-starts and his eyes flicking to every dark corner that the fire couldn’t quite reach. 

He couldn’t have stopped it if he wanted to. 

It was always going to be like this.

There was never a future where he and Obi-Wan were going to be happy. 

“I’m sorry,” Ahsoka said, her voice small and defeated, “Your family are victims just as much as mine.”

The whole venator went down with her. The whole venator went down and she was trapped aboard with an army of mindless killers. The whole venator went down and his baby brother was on it, trapped inside the walls of his own head, holding a blaster to the girl he’d once told Cody he’d never let any harm come to. 

“Oh gods,” Cody choked out, “Oh gods.”

The pain threatened to take him. His chest was almost painful in its hollowness, his stomach roiling with nausea and hurt. His people, his brothers. Slaves to the great conductor of a broken symphony. Mindless, used against their will. Nothing more than weapons to be aimed and fired at whoever dared oppose the Empire.

They were nothing. 

They had always been nothing. 

“Cody,” a hand settled on his knee, and from it warmth escaped. For the first time in months, Cody felt something other than cold. “They’re waking up. Your brothers are waking up. There’s a movement -”

“Stop it,” Cody snapped, though the effect was lost as his tears finally began to spill, “I don’t - just stop.”

Ahsoka withdrew her hand and it took everything in Cody not to keen at the loss of heat. 

He didn’t want to fight anymore. He was tired, too tired to ever take up command again. 

How many had he seen die? Did none of it matter? They were just pawns, just pieces of a game to be moved around in order to undermine the Jedi. His entire existence was there to hurt the Jedi. The Jedi - the only ones who ever gave a semblance of a shit about them. And the whole point of the clones’ existence was to murder them in cold blood. 

“Rex wants to see you.”

Cody’s entire being froze. 

“He doesn’t know I found you. He’s been looking for you since Crosshair defected and told us you left.”

Crosshair defected.

“Wolffe too. He and Rex joined up a while back. Pretty sure one of your old commanders is with them.”

Boil? No, Boil was still with the Empire working as a scout.

It didn’t matter, he reminded himself, he put himself here for a reason. Whatever life he lived from here on out, he deserved. 

“Cody,” Ahsoka called his attention again and this time when Cody looked at her, she looked scared. It took him a moment to work out that she was scared for him. “Rex is alive. I took him off the ship with me. His chip is gone, he’s okay.”

Cody stood abruptly, stumbling outside and making it a mere three steps from the doorway before throwing up. He shook, his hands on his knees, as he gagged and spit, his mind and body revolting against him in a horrible display of unity. 

A hand rubbed over his back, the way Ponds used to do oh so long ago. Back when module scores and breaking curfew were their tallest troubles. Did they have the chips even then? Were they doomed from the start? How cruel, to never even let them begin before deciding how they would end. 

“Can I tell him you’re here?” Ahsoka’s voice was soft and concerned. She sounded kind. It made him want to slam his fist into something. “He’s worried. They both are.”

Cody shook his head no. He didn’t deserve to get to have that, not when so many of his brothers were alone and drifting. Not when Obi-Wan, his general, his Jedi, his sweetheart, lay broken and defeated at the hands of a force neither of them could escape. 

No, his fate would be the same as the rest of the galaxy’s. He would not allow himself the tenderness of brotherhood, not after all he’d done in the name of nothing. 

“Go,” Cody croaked, his voice hoarse from bile and tears, “They’ll find you if you stay.”

Ahsoka’s hand didn’t pull away, “He misses you. He misses his big brother.”

That was playing fucking dirty and she knew it. 

“Go,” Cody said more forcefully, “Get out of here.”

“And where will you go?” Ahsoka asked gently, “When they come knocking, where will you run to?”

“I won’t,” Cody panted, “I’ll accept it.”

There was a deep sigh from behind him. Cody didn’t take back his words. He didn’t want to lie to her, not after all she’d been through at their hands.

“I’m going to keep looking for Obi-Wan,” some of the strength returned to Ahsoka’s voice, “I don’t think he’s dead, so there must be a reason he’s still hidden. If you joined me, he might -”

“No,” Cody said quickly, spitting one last time and standing back to his full height, “I’m not doing that to myself.”

“Cody -”

“Ahsoka,” Cody turned to face her, his hands coming to rest on her shoulders. He was once again struck by how warm she was, “He’s gone. By my hand or the Emperor’s. I can’t - I can’t let myself think otherwise. I can’t pin my hope on a lie.”

Ahsoka stepped closer to him, a furrow appearing between her eyebrows. It reminded him of Skywalker. “It’s not a lie. He escaped long enough to get a message out. If he’d known before he would’ve said something to someone, would’ve at least had you de-chipped. If his body had been at the temple we would’ve found it, it would’ve been reported. But all that remained of him was this message.”

Cody shook his head. He couldn’t do this to himself. He couldn’t let himself think these things. 

“Come with me. Just for a little bit. If we find something, stay longer, if not I’ll drop you right back here.”

Cody scrubbed a hand over his face, wincing at the dirt and sweat rough underneath his palm. 

“I won’t even tell Rex.”

Cody sighed and looked at her. She looked earnest, at least. Not as defensive and angry as earlier.

“Please,” he suddenly realized Ahsoka was begging, “come with me.”

Cody looked down at her, considering. “How long have you been on your own?”

It seemed he hit the nail on the head. Ahsoka’s face fell, just for a moment, before she recovered her composure. It reminded him of Obi-Wan. 

“Rex and I split up after the venator,” she admitted, “I tried civilian life for a while, but everywhere I went people died. It’s been a while.”

Since she left the temple the first time, Cody translated for himself. 

Cody looked down at her, weighing his options. He didn’t believe Obi-Wan was alive. Even his general could not escape death in its entirety. But Ahsoka was on a crash course. She was smart, dedicated, and clever enough to find him and keep tabs on Rex’s operation. She was also angry and alone, left behind by people she’d once turned her back on. Her guilt likely matched or exceeded his. 

Cody breathed out slowly, “Two months.”

Ahsoka’s eyes widened.

“That’s all I can promise.”

Ahsoka nodded, “That’s fine. I’ll take it.”

And then he was being forcefully dragged into a hug. 

She was finally tall enough that Cody could rest his chin in the space between her montrals. He wondered distantly if she’d outgrow him one day, before remembering how Shaak Ti towered over them all and decided that was very likely. He couldn’t tell which one of them was shaking harder, but decided to ignore it. This was the first time in months he’d allowed himself to touch anyone beyond a handshake here or there. 

“You’re warm,” Ahsoka murmured into his chest, a soft sigh escaping her, “I don’t remember the last time I was warm.”

Cody’s eyes widened, but he said nothing. Just ran a hand over her lekku in the best display of comfort he could give. 

“Two months,” Cody whispered, “I can only promise that.”

“It’ll be enough,” Ahsoka’s hands clenched in the back of Cody’s clothes. He understood what she wasn’t saying.

It’ll have to be enough.

[deathbecomesthem]

Ronance; An Exile in Guyville Interlude

Robin and Nancy get an unexpected phone call from Eddie.

---

Sunday mornings are always quiet in the small apartment. Robin is often found curled up on the end of the big brown couch wrapped in the chevron throw her grandmother made when she was a young wife. Today, she’s in her spot and holding a new copy of The Shipping News in one fist and a soy latte, brewed in her kitchen, in her other. L7 plays low on the stereo in the corner, the only other noise in the room is the sound of the typewriter keys clicking with the fast pace of her lover’s fingers. The sound of home.

The cordless phone sits in its cradle on the end table next to Robin’s tightly coiled body. Its ringing jolts her upright, the still warm coffee sloshing just at the rim of the handmade blue ceramic mug. The clicking of the keys is paused as Nancy rises from her spot at her desk and grabs the receiver of the corded phone that hangs between the kitchen and living room while Robin grabs the cordless receiver at her side. Anyone that calls this time on a Sunday will want to talk to both of them. Robin’s first thought is Max, but then she remembers that she’s got actual real life plans this weekend. Maybe it’s Stevie.

“Yeh-lo, Bundy Residence, Al speaking.” Robin beat Nancy to the punch in answering, and Eddie’s giggle on the other end was her reward. Her Eddie. It has been too long since he last checked in with them.

“Hey Al, is Peggy on the line too?” Eddie’s voice is tired. It’s 10 am, and this is earlier than either of the girls would expect to hear from him. 

“Eddie, I miss you so much.” Nancy’s wobbly voice sends warmth through Eddie’s chest. God. He wishes they were closer. The 6 hour drive to NY seemed so much shorter when he signed his lease. It may as well be a 36 hour drive with how busy everyone is.

R: “Eddie, baby, my bat boy, please. When am I allowed to come out there and dig around in your inventory? I need to make sure your representation of the lesbian musical community is up to par.” 

“God I miss you guys. You have no idea.” The hitch in his voice matches Nancy’s wobble. There’s a hole in all of their lives when they’re not together. Pieces of themselves that only live in the other.

“Tell us everything. What’s it like there? Do you have a soft opening date yet?” Nancy is ready to listen. She closes her eyes as he talks, and saves her questions for any lulls. The sound of his voice lets her imagine him sitting next to her, holding her hand and telling her all about his new adventure. 

It takes only a few moments for the conversation to fall back into its normal rhythm. The three of them are more than friends, more than members of the private hidden sexuality club, they are family. Robin and Nancy have wanted Eddie with them for years. After Vecna, and then Steve they spent countless hours discussing how to get him to move into a space with them. Keep him safe. Protect him. He is theirs, as much as Max is. And Steve, but Steve has his own family now. It’s not the same.

The hour-long conversation revolves around someone neither Nancy or Robin knows. He didn’t call to catch up, he called because he’s scared. He called because his new friend, Robin and Nancy both know there’s more than friendship there, is in trouble.

They listen. They give vague advice. They share several side-long glances, especially when Eddie describes your living situation and age. Robin had rolled her eyes a little and silently mouthed, “21!” at that point before refocusing on her friend on the other end of the phone line. Now that the lovers are sitting on the couch, the phone receivers placed back in their cradles for now, they hold each other and let their concern sit silently between them.

Eddie is in trouble. Steve is visiting him this weekend. And you, a 21 year old with a certifiable lunatic hot on your heels, is cozied up in his apartment for the foreseeable future. 

“I’m taking the week off. I’m going out there to see Steve and meet this girl.” Nancy announces to the room, as making a final statement during a debate. She can do that, leave at a moment’s notice, she doesn’t have her own business to run. Robin groans at the thought. Not just that Nancy will be traveling alone, but because she’s going to miss out.

“Not fair, Nance.” Robin offers no real protest, just that weak and childish reply.

“Not fair, Rob, I’m sorry. I love you.” It’s not fair, and Nancy’s tempted to encourage Robing to let the shop remain unopened for the next week so that she can join her, but that wouldn’t be fair either. 

You have no idea what’s coming. Steve and Nancy, former lovers, Eddie’s complicated past coming to chase down his present. Again, in her take-no-prisoners tone, Nancy announces to Robin, “I’m taking the glock.”

[emrysflame]

Thoughts with Alicole

*Spoilers for the first episode of S2*

Now I am never going to hate on any ship that on its own, is not a bad ship. This post really has my opinions on the characters and how I see their relationship in terms of that and the show.

Now I honestly really don’t care who Alicent sleeps with. Could she have picked a better man? Yes. But my issue is not who she sleeps with. It is with her hypocrisy. It doesn’t matter if Alicent is no longer married to Viserys. She is an unmarried woman. And an unmarried woman during that time, by their standards (the standards that Alicent is holding Rhaenyra up to), she is not allowed to have sex as she is not married.

So it is hypocritical for her to be shaming Rhaenyra for doing the same thing she has done. Having sex outside of being married. It is not wrong to call her a hypocrite if that is what she is. (And even there is talk about how Alicent & Cole have been sleeping together even before Visery’s death which makes her hypocrisy worse).

And then there is Cole. Also his hypocrisy comes into play. He’s a White Cloak. He shouldn’t be having sex at all. He should be guarding the royal family which he had failed at. Alicent is not going to marry him just like Rhaenyra wouldn’t, and yet he’s not treating Alicent the same. He didn’t want to be “Rhaenyra’s whore” caring about his “honor” but he doesn’t seem to care about his “honor” when it comes to Alicent.

Also also. Are we going to talk about the power imbalance that everyone was saying when it came between Rhaenyra & Cole? Are people going to call Alicent a r@pist? (I don’t think either of them are, but if you were someone talking about the power imbalance between Rhaenyra and Cole and calling Rhaenyra one, you should place that same standard on Alicent)

[vegaseatsass]

My Stand-In Episode 9

I have like 10min to ejaculate some emotions before I have to run again so lmfao /types hard and fast I adore that after twisted coercive action after twisted coercive action, Ming almost almost almost had his Kinn moment where he lets Joe go. He came SO close. But he couldn't stick the landing. He's going twisted coercion to the VERY END, BABY!!! And I do think in many ways that's a clue about whether he would have been able to let Joe go when he asked in the first life, before the baseball bat, if Joe hadn't gotten the call from Sol and given Ming a justification for spiralling into delululand. I really do think he was close to hearing Joe then too, and honoring his desperate requests to let go. But "close" means letting him walk across the street and then chasing him, not actually releasing his grip. Ming will always be so very Ming <3

Wut pissed me off throughout this ENTIRE episode but I am trying not to relapse to "the NARRATIVE doesn't UNDERSTAND what it's DOING" reactions to characters with his framing and actually just take what's on the screen in good faith. And what's on the screen is a man who never truly acknowledged his own role in getting Joe killed, doomed to make all the same choices and mistakes all over again. While carrying himself with so much unearned self-righteousness and avuncular "wisdom", augh I hate him but yeah. He thinks what he did wrong in Joe's first life is like not yell at him hard enough to keep him from driving off a cliff. Not push an abused, financially desperate man into further isolation with nary a moment of considering trying to support him or even just giving him companionship for the night while he recovered from being fuckin kidnapped. So yeah, it's not surprising he's consistently making the easy choices, the "it's not REALLY my problem" choices, that put Joe back in Ming's grasp again and again. Like okay thank you as a plot device Wut (yes I am a sick and twisted hypocrite lmao), but fuck you fuck you fuck you as a human being.

However! SOL THIS EPISODE! Oh my god this is why I needed to quickly post! The duality of this character! I made FUN of Ming for thinking that Soljoe as a branded pair was any kind of threat, but episode 9 Sol was like "no actually. Audience shipping is reality if we try hard enough to make it be so." The way the lines are so blurred for him between just desperately desperately wanting to be there for Joe and desperately desperately wanting Joe to see that Ming is the wrong choice and Sol is the right choice, and I have strong doubts about how fully conscious the latter is - he knows he still wants Joe, sure, but I think he sees his (nonexistent, sorry baby) romantic eligibility as an opportunity to get Joe away from Ming. If Joe had a partner who wasn't violent and dangerous, I truly believe Sol would back off while harboring his feelings more quietly. But if Joe is single or with Ming? Sol has to try with everything he's got and cannot see the ways that that compromises his support for Joe.

And yet! EVERY time he called out Wut for facilitating Mingjoe (SERIOUSLY WHAT THE FUCK WUT) I was cheering for him. Helping Joe with (Joe-on-Joe) crimes??? Being his lookout??? The crowd ROARED! And there's something to be said for Joe in the middle of the grieving process for his body and life, and Sol being the one who comes by to accompany him the next morning. Again, it's that duality: he is coming because they have a music video to promote, he is coming because he's giddy about selling them as a branded pair and maybe making Joe see him as a romantic option. But being very frank, I think it matters that Joe had someone who knew what happened and knew he was in the middle of grieving be there at his side that morning. I don't think he struggled to wake up when Ing shook him because he was sleepy. I think he was carrying something a lot heavier than that, and you need community to help you carry that burden. And there's nobody trying to or thinking of offering that for Joe except Sol. For partly selfish reasons, again, that's the juice of the character, that that duality is always present for him, but for ME it still matters as a kind of material support.

Lastly, the little glimpse of Yim being bitter and fucked up about Joe's death, and how that went over Joe's head, because he doesn't expect his CHILDHOOD FRIEND to remember him and grieve him. Delicious little detail.

[dpraved]

a couple of eidens and kuyas from my awful and wretched sketch files

[meowmeowmessi]

chelsea fans moving like true coolers during the burofax drama icl

[ribbonbonny]

THEYRE HERE!! AND IVE GOT NOWHERE TO FUCKING PUT EM 🔥🔥🔥