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#{ ay good shit right there }
opens-up-4-nobody · 6 months
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#i was looking through old photos today. they where from wjen i was like 1 and it made me so sad#bc my mum would have been like only a year or 2 older then i am now and she looked so young#and now she has an abdomen full of tumors and blistered hands and feet. theyre prob gonna hsve to remove her bladder#but shes still very pragmatic abt it. but she grew up in a house where no one really cared about her feelings so she made them small#and now her mother calls and doesn't ask how her grandkids are doing and doesn't ask how her daughter is doing. im cursed with terrible#grandparents on both sides but i resent my mothers mother worse. though my dad said i probably wouldnt have survived his upbringing#and hes right. my nana has like zero empathy and cant cook for shit. idk how my parents r so normal but the fact i had a good upbringing is#probably the only reason im still here. and thats the other thing that made me sad abt the old pics. just looking at this little baby with a#fucked up head and thinking: in 25 years that kid is gonna b so broken down their not gonns kno what to do or how to fix it. idk whats wrong#with me. ive always been some stage of miserable but i used to b able to get things done. and now i cant seem to force functionality#and it sucks. bc im home now and i still feel like im cringing around this open wound in my chest. but whatever#as of today ive started taking ab1lify. hopefully it helps in the long term but in the short term it triggers my 0cd. which is not fun#its so frustrating. whatever. i also found out my eyes used to not work together. not enough to have a lazy eye but it was hard for me to#read and apparently my eyes were tracking at like double the speed of a normal person. wtf is wrong with my brain? also also my mum was like#yea i never would have guessed bip0lar but we thought it was something. autism i could see 100% but yea didnt see that coming. ao i guess#i brehave like a bit of an oddball. ans my nana would bother my dad to try to make me participate in church and my dad was like no. she#clearly don't wanna b here lol. ay. they did the best they could which i appreciate#unrelated
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hauntingblue · 6 months
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So roger gave the hat to shanks(to become pirate king after him I guess?) But didn't make it??? Lmao
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Luke:My favorite lyric here is definitely when Ariana suddenly says...
Luke:”Wishing on a shooting star in the sky”. “We can do anything, if we try”. “Can’t ressurect Ghandi”. “But if we put our heads together”. “We can do anything”.
Alex:Probably my favorite pop song lyric of all time.
Luke:Wish on a star! You can be who you are! We can do anything! Except ressurect Martin Luther King Jr who was killed by the FBI.
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lisired · 4 months
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wish i never
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pairing: Jaehyun x (f) reader
genre/warnings: smut, angst, debatable morals, unprotected sex, brother’s worst enemy, forbidden love, mark’s dad is a cop for the sake of plot, mentions of drugs and drug-related death
summary: Your brother, Johnny, hates Jaehyun and has never told you why. Although you intend on leaving it alone, unforeseen events thrust you into a forbidden love affair with Jaehyun. In between hookups and stolen kisses, you have to bury your feelings for Jaehyun around your overprotective older brother.
word count: 27.2k (listen… i don’t know anymore okay)
a/n: this one lowkey kinda hit different for me cause i’ve had a forbidden love and it broke me. you can kinda tell by how long this is lol ya girl went all OUT. as always, feedback is appreciated!
“Absolutely not.”
“Dude, come on,” Mark whined. 
“Hell the fuck no,” Yuta barked firmly, crossing his arms. “The last time we gave you shrooms, you texted Johnny to ask him where your phone was.”
“And?”
“You texted him from your own phone,” Yuta deadpanned. 
You snickered. Your best friend and drugs were an infamously egregious combination. Mark Lee sober was already full of shit, but Mark Lee high on whatever substance he could get his hands on? Indescribably bad. You couldn’t think of a word to even explain it.
Mark gestured over to you. “But you gave her drugs.”
Yuta grimaced. “First of all, don’t say that too loud. Johnny will kill me. Second of all, she can actually handle her shit and what can I say? She's a loyal customer.”
You added, “Plus I’m not doing fucking shrooms. Yuta just deals me weed. If Johnny ever found out I was doing anything else, he would have a fit.”
Mark huffed something under his breath about how shrooms were the softest of soft drugs there were, not that it would’ve helped his case. 
Your lips curled into a grin as you joked, “Why don’t you just chug Jeno’s notorious punch and call it a night? That’s what I’m gonna do.” 
“I’ve actually got plans with a chick who’s been dying to chug my notorious punch. I’ll be back later. Save me a drink, dude,” Mark said, grinning from ear to ear at a text message on his screen. Probably from the aforementioned chick that was begging to blow him, or so he said. 
You pretended to wince, but gave him a high five in celebration. “Aye, aye, captain,” you chirped, saluting him. 
After Mark made a break for the stairs, you abandoned Yuta to make a beeline for the drink bar. There was no such thing as a party with some of your boys without drugs and alcohol. Your brother was an overprotective nuisance, but even he knew it was impossible to keep you away from your shots and the occasional marijuana.
Plus it would've been hypocritical as all hell, so he let it slide. Not that you wanted to press your luck with something harder. On some nights you were a little drunk and a little high, and it brought out the worst in you. You were certain all of Johnny's friends kept blackmail worthy videos of you doing the unspeakable and you were content with never knowing what all those fuckers had on you. The embarrassment would be enough to kill.
You clocked one girl dry-heaving in the corner on the way and it was all the discouragement required to make you reach for a can of beer instead. To your surprise, it seemed like somebody had a similar plan, their hand coincidentally dropping on the same one. 
"Oh, I'm sorry. You can have it…," you trailed, glancing up to make eye contact with nobody less than the devil incarnate.
Ricky looked surprised to see you, though you weren’t sure why. If Jeno was throwing a party, you were bound to be in attendance. “What up, baby? Long time no see.”
“Ricky, you lost the right to call me that the second I caught you with your pants to your ankles in a closet with what's-her-face.”
More importantly, you were frankly surprised to see him there. Your stupid ex was many things, none good, and his audacity? It was out of control. Part of you wanted to commend him, because it took guts to show his face around your side of town after you yanked his trousers down in front of everyone and their mother. 
And yet he took that retort in stride. “Baby, how many times do I have to tell you that I’m sorry? It was a mistake and I’ll never make it again.”
“You’re absolutely right,” you replied, bobbing your head in agreement. “You’re a sorry motherfucker and you’ll never make it again, because we’re done for good.”
But Ricky just couldn’t take the hint that you were so fucking over anything that had to do with him and crept closer, continuing darkly, “Don’t you know you’re nothing without me? Nothing!”
Having surrounded yourself with enough drunk and high people countless times, it was obvious that Ricky was under the influence, which made him extremely capricious. He looked a grand total of two seconds away from reaching out and seizing you by your arm. 
Your eyes darted across the room for anybody you knew, but it was difficult when dancing bodies obscured them from your field of view. Yuta had probably wandered to snag more drug deals, Mark was getting his dick wet, and Johnny and Taeyong were nowhere to be found. 
You were about to resign yourself to the fact that you were positively out of luck until you heard a deep baritone ask from beside you, “Do we have a problem over here?”
It took all of two seconds to recognize its owner. Jeong Jaehyun, sang the little chorus in your head. Your brother’s worst enemy. The beef seemed more than a little one-sided, but you didn’t ask questions. For whatever reason, the mere mention of Jaehyun’s name made your brother tense. 
It was clear that Ricky was sizing Jaehyun up and he snapped with potent venom, “Who the fuck are you?”
“The host’s cousin,” Jaehyun said, looking tall and foreboding, as if he was daring somebody to challenge him. “And you are?”
“The love of her life.”
You didn’t know how he could confidently lie like that, though you wouldn’t be surprised if he wholeheartedly believed it, which was downright terrifying. You learned the hard way that this boy was as self-centered as they came. 
Jaehyun took one look at you, and the glaringly obvious discomfort on your face, and replied, "Yeah, I don't think she wants to be around you. If I were you, I'd get the fuck out of here and never come back."
Ricky chuckled. "And if I don't?"
Jaehyun shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. "Fuck around and find out," was all he said. His lips were drawn into a line and his gaze was fixed to your ex's idiotic face with a lethal stare. Not to mention Jaehyun had a couple of inches on him, which made you resist a satisfied little grin.
Obviously, Ricky wanted to stay and claim you as his pretty property, but even the lack of inhibitions didn’t hinder his judgment at that moment. Like any wise person would, he made a beeline for the closest exit. It was common sense that Jeno and his associates were not to be fucked with. 
Your shoulders relaxed when Ricky was gone. If anything, he had gotten off easy. He was lucky that you had no clue where Johnny was. You were positive he would’ve knocked the sense out of him, if he had any, which was debatable. 
“Insufferable prick,” you grumbled under your breath. Then, you glanced up to Jaehyun, who, to your surprise, was already looking at you. “Thanks, Jaehyun. I don’t know what he would’ve done if you weren’t here.”
Jaehyun still looked a little pissed, but your words seemed to make him soften. “You don’t have to thank me for that. It’s basic human decency.”
“And some people don’t even have that,” you replied, intending for it to be a joke, but it came out a little more melancholy. 
If Jaehyun noticed, he said nothing about it.
Before he could even if he wanted to, something stitched your brows together and you mentioned, “Hey, I didn’t know Jeno was your cousin.”
“Me, neither.”
It took a second for that to settle in, but once you finally understood, amusement broke the confusion tensing your face and your lips parted in laughter. Jaehyun joined you. His bold-faced little white lie saved your ass, but ironically, that wasn’t what you were focused on. 
It was those deep, adorable dimples on both of his cheeks that somehow made him even more handsome. 
Instantly, something in you chided, Bitch, don’t check him out. He’s your brother’s worst enemy. You’re out of your goddamn mind if you think you’re getting laid tonight just because he’s playing nice.
“I should go,” you said after a minute, finally grabbing a beer. “Thanks again. I really appreciate it.”
You escaped before Jaehyun could tell you not to thank him. His eyes were fixed to your back, following you until you were obscured completely by partygoers. He knew you were Johnny’s sister, but damn, you were kinda cute. 
At least for now, Jaehyun wouldn’t play with fire. Johnny almost kicked his ass one time and he wasn’t exactly keen on getting his ass handed to him. 
You were half tempted to stop by Jeno’s room to check if any of the guys were passing a blunt around in there, but the last time your curiosity got the better of you, you accidentally walked in on Jeno shirtless with some half-naked girl. Not a sight you wanted to relive, so you kept downstairs. 
Your eyes scanned the living room for any familiar faces, but it was difficult to tell if anybody was there. There was a gigantic crowd dancing to Kiss Me Thru The Phone and you chuckled at a certain memory of Mark drunk-singing along to the lyrics. 
“There you are,” came a familiar voice beside you. Your gaze flitted to Johnny, whose face was stitched with concern. “Taeyong told me that he saw you with Jaehyun. You good?”
“I’m fine,” you hollered over the music. “Just heartbroken that Mark abandoned me to get laid.”
Any other time, Johnny would’ve laughed, but his lips were pressed into a solid line. “Have you had anything?”
You rolled your eyes and exhaled a breath. “Just the beer in my hand, Johnny.”
He studied your face, as if he was attempting to figure out whether or not you were telling the truth, but ultimately decided to believe you. “Listen, I just wanna look out for you. You’re my little sister. If anything were to happen to you...”
“Mom and Dad would kill you and dump your body in the woods for bears to find. Yes, I know,” you groaned exasperatedly, cutting him off. “I get it, Johnny. But I need you to get that I’m not a little girl anymore.”
“If you were a little girl, you wouldn’t be here and we wouldn’t give you weed.”
That comment wasn’t even worth a roll of your eyes. You took a sip of beer and ignored it. 
“Why were you around Jaehyun anyways?” Johnny asked. It was obviously the question he was itching to ask. Probably wanted to make sure Jaehyun wasn’t making any advances. 
The memory of your bastard ex getting uncomfortably close to you after reaching for a drink he clearly didn’t need, raising his voice at you in a way no woman should ever accept, made you shudder. “Ricky decided to try and win me back. If you can even call it that.”
Johnny immediately perked up in anger. “What?”
“Relax. Jaehyun already took care of him. That’s why he was there. Nothing more, nothing less.”
“I swear to god, I’m gonna kill that son of a bitch,” Johnny hissed, looking a total of five seconds away from giving someone a piece of his mind. 
“Ricky, or Jaehyun?”
“Does it matter?”
You shrugged. Your lips parted to ask why he hated Jaehyun in the first place, but you cut yourself off. There was a reason why you didn’t ask him months ago. Johnny might’ve been overprotective, but that was because he was your brother and he loved you. When he was ready, he would tell you. 
The night dragged on. This one was a little more boring than usual, but that could’ve been chalked up to you still being shaken up about your encounter with your ex. You almost considered what would’ve happened had Jaehyun not been around to intervene, but your mind dared not wander there. 
Part of you wanted to know where he was camping out at. Surely, he had to be around here somewhere, but you weren’t going to look. Especially not with Johnny on high alert. He was being extra careful, wanting to be there in case your ex was crazy enough to return.
You listed what you knew about Jeong Jaehyun. For one, he was fine as hell. That was undeniable. Secondly, he was lowkey, which was why you essentially knew nothing about him other than the fact that he was drop-dead gorgeous. 
Sure, he made an appearance at these parties every now and then, but most of the time he kept to a tight-knit circle of friends and if they weren’t there, there was no way in hell he was coming. Sometimes his roommates’ threw parties at their house, but he rarely went downstairs, preferring to linger in his room doing fuck knows what. 
You honestly couldn’t blame him. People sucked. Most of them, anyways. 
Only one day later, you were gripping an overlook, peering down at little critters splashing in the lake from the bridge above. For a long time, there was nobody there to join you other than your little nonhuman friends. You liked coming here every now and then to clear your head. It was your safe place, your happy place. 
The sky was cloudy but there was only a nine percent chance of rain this afternoon, thus you weren’t too worried. You needed to go somewhere. Home was too isolating, but everywhere else was too open. 
You could be happy here. There were no entitled assholes or overprotective brothers around to get on your nerves every five seconds. It was only you and the gifts of nature. 
And somebody else. 
“I thought that was you,” said somebody from your side. 
Imagine your shock when you turned and saw Jeong Jaehyun jogging towards you. In the fucking flesh. 
It was harder not to check him out this time. The man was practically drenched head to toe in sweat, his very exposed skin glistening with moisture. The shirt he was wearing hugged his chest and it was all you could do not to salivate. 
Rather than continue to rake your eyes up his frame, you asked playfully, “Are you stalking me, Jeong Jaehyun?”
Jaehyun’s eyes twinkled with mirth. God, how come you never noticed how pretty and brown they were? “Actually, I’m surprised. I was cutting through here instead of my usual jog route. The weather looked pretty bad.”
You snickered, crossing your arms. “You didn’t check the forecast before you left the house? It’s not gonna rain. Probably.”
Jaehyun furrowed a brow. “Probably?”
“That guy on the news is an infamous liar,” you grumbled under your breath. 
Jaehyun chuckled. He wiped the sweat from his forehead, coming closer to the railing where you were, but kept a safe distance between your bodies lest he made you uncomfortable. “I told you why I’m here. What about you?”
Your nose got an instant waft of Jaehyun’s scent and it was godly, which was shocking considering he was literally sweating everywhere. “Oh, you know. I come here from time to time to think, or to not think. Depending on what the situation calls for.”
“Really?”
You bobbed your head. “Yeah. Why?”
Jaehyun shook his head. “Nothing,” was what he said, but in reality, he was thinking about how he passed this bridge nearly every goddamn day and never knew if he took a detour, he’d potentially cross paths with a pretty little thing like you. 
You lifted a brow, but didn’t press. 
“Are you… okay?” Jaehyun reluctantly asked. 
You bobbed your head. “Yup, I’m alright. It’s just that Ricky approaching me has Johnny on edge, so now whenever I go out he and his friends are watching me like a bunch of hawks.” 
Jaehyun winced. “Damn. That must suck.”
“I get he’s doing it from a place of love, but fuck, sometimes I just wanna be left the hell alone, you know?”
Jaehyun nodded. God, did he know. And not only because he was an overwhelmingly introverted dude. “Yeah, I know exactly what you mean.”
That caught your attention. “You do?”
Jaehyun scratched the back of his head. “I mean, I don’t have an overprotective brother, but I do have an overprotective mother. It’s sweet and all, but do you know what it makes you look like when you’re on a date with a girl and your mom won’t stop calling you?”
Your lips couldn’t help but curl into a grin. “Aw, you’re a Momma’s boy.”
“This is exactly what I mean,” Jaehyun groaned. 
“No, it’s… cute,” you said, but it was impossible to control the giggles falling from your lips. “Most of the guys I know like that are sweethearts. Johnny, Mark. Maybe you.”
Jaehyun found that amusing. “You think I’m a sweetheart?”
You shrugged your shoulders. “Maybe. I don’t know you well enough to decide, but seemingly, sure.”
“Do you want to?”
“Do I want to what?”
“Know me better,” Jaehyun said, tentative. Almost as if he wasn’t sure what he wanted.
That was the million dollar question. On the one hand, Jaehyun was cute and it most likely wouldn’t hurt to spend a little time together, but on the other, there was the Johnny thing. You groaned. “God, Johnny would have a heart attack if he knew I was with you right now. Maybe even an aneurysm.”
Jaehyun snickered with mischief. “Who said that he has to know?”
That response downright shocked you. You weren’t expecting it from somebody like him, though then again, you knew virtually nothing about this boy and it only made you want to sate your curiosity. “Ooh. You’re trouble, Jeong Jaehyun.”
Jaehyun took that in stride. “I’m guessing you like that.”
Taking a step closer, you started to close the gap between you that Jaehyun had created for your sake. “Hm, you know what they say.”
“I don’t think I do.” 
“It’s always the quiet ones that deal the most damage,” you whispered sultrily, glancing into his gentle brown eyes. 
Jaehyun’s eyes flickered. That caught him off-guard.
Then, you backed away and waved him goodbye. “I’ve gotta go. Later, Dimples.”
Dimples? That was new. Jaehyun was pleasantly surprised by the nickname and he was so stunned that it distracted him from his train of thoughts. 
It was only when you were long gone that he realized that you never answered his question. 
You needed time to think, to decide if Jaehyun was worth potentially losing your brother’s trust. You didn’t know why he hated him, but his less than enthusiastic reactions to him said more than enough. Jaehyun was cute, but you could easily find another cute guy whose bones your brother didn’t mention crushing.
But damn, you were curious. And curiosity killed the cat. You knew one thing, though. You were starting to like Jeong Jaehyun. 
You shook your head, ashamed of yourself. This is really what’s it’s come to, huh?
Jaehyun thought about that exchange on the bridge every now and then for the next couple of days and chastised himself for even making moves on you of all people. She’s his baby sister, you asshole. She’s off-limits. 
Not that it would really stop him, if you let him have you. 
It wasn’t like Johnny had to know. Jaehyun could keep a secret and he assumed that you had a handful of your own. People with strict upbringings tended to have a lot of practice with being sneaky and your situation was close enough. 
He sat on his bed and heaved a breath, playing with a lighter. 
Meanwhile, you were with your boys, listening to them chatter about disgusting boy things but lowkey too curious to abandon your spot on the sofa that was too comfortable for its own good. Nobody liked sleeping on sofas, but you swore you wouldn’t mind on this one. Plus sometimes you’d gotten drunk here enough where you almost dozed off. 
You made a gagging noise when Mark started to talk about his nth blowjob of the week. You weren’t counting, but he definitely was. 
“Your dick probably has so much chlamydia that it’ll mutate into a different variant like Covid,” Haechan teased. 
You grimaced, but you definitely agreed. 
“You’re one to talk,” Mark snapped. 
Haechan nodded, grinning proudly. “Of course, I am. I always wear condoms and get tested regularly. I’m clean as a whistle.”
You shook your head in amusement. “I’ve never understood the saying ‘clean as a whistle.’ Like aren’t whistles actually contaminated from being in someone’s mouth? Now, when you combine that logic with your dick…”
Jeno burst into laughter. Yuta obviously found it funny from the smile on his face and Mark would never miss a chance to laugh at his friend’s expense. 
Haechan dramatically rolled his eyes. “And what about you, little miss? How often do you get laid?”
“Definitely not as often as you guys,” you replied, coming to a stand. Not that you wanted to kiss the sofa goodbye. “I’ll be right back. I’ve gotta tinkle.”
Mark’s nose wrinkled. “You didn’t think that was too much information?”
You almost threw the remote at your best friend, but spared him. There was no way this dude was talking about too much information when he was literally giving you all a play-by-play of his sex life. 
“If it burns when you pee, Mark gave you the airborne strand of chlamydia,” Yuta joked dryly. 
You left too quickly to see Mark attempt to murder Yuta and it was a shame that you had to miss it. There was no doubt that Haechan would exaggerate the moment to make you regret not being there, but right now, you were concentrated on finding the bathroom. 
And of course, it was when you finally made it upstairs through the groups of bodies that you realized you didn’t know where it was. 
You groaned, cursing yourself for being so forgetful. You’d only been here a couple of times and never long enough to use the fucking bathroom, apparently. And you really couldn’t fucking hold it. 
You glanced around the set of doors upstairs, incapable of keeping still. Thank god nobody was here except for you. If I was a bathroom, which door would I be behind?
You set eyes on a random door and said, “Fuck it.” You marched right up to it and knocked none too gently, seeping with impatience. 
To your surprise, it was Jaehyun that opened the door, a pair of headphones slung around his neck. And behind him was a bed, not a toilet. 
Jaehyun’s eyes flickered with shock and he said your name. “What are you doing here?”
“Oh, um, I was kinda looking for the bathroom. I’m guessing this isn’t it,” you said with a little humor, which was remarkable, all things considered. “What are you doing here?”
“I live here, baby.”
“Oh.” You knew that, so the fact that it slipped your mind meant that you definitely weren’t yourself when you had to pee. 
Jaehyun had the audacity to laugh. He opened his door a little wider. “You can use mine. It’s that door over there.”
“Thank you,” you said in relief, immediately darting for the bathroom. 
You were even more relieved by the time you washed your hands and walked back into his bedroom, no longer fighting to keep still. Jaehyun was sitting on his bed where his headphones were now cast aside. God, how loud did you have to be knocking for him to hear you over those?
“You sure were in a hurry,” Jaehyun teased. 
You rolled your eyes, but a little laugh fell from your lips. You wholeheartedly blamed Jeno and his damn poisonous drinks. Sighing in relief, you glanced around Jaehyun’s room. For a boy, he was exceptionally tidy. He had vinyls organized on a shelf. “No girls in here, I see.”
Jaehyun didn’t know whether to be offended by that or not. “What do you think I am, a pimp?”
You snickered. “Nah. I’m just traumatized. Sue me.”
Jaehyun knew better than to ask questions that he didn’t want to know the answers to, so he left it alone. “You never answered my question the other day.”
“What question?” you asked. Obviously, you were playing dumb. You needed every second to think about what your response would be, although you’d had the past forty-eight hours and then some to contemplate. 
Your damn brother was the only thing that stood between you and Jaehyun. 
Johnny wasn’t around this time for obvious reasons. There was no way in hell that he’d step foot in the house of his mortal enemy. He didn’t want you to be there either, but you assured him that you’d steer clear of all things Jeong Jaehyun. 
And it wasn’t as if you had deliberately lied. It (kind of) wasn’t your fault that you didn’t know where the bathroom was. 
“If you wanted to get to know me better.”
You stepped over to his bed, sitting beside him and sighing. “Jaehyun, you know my brother won’t approve.”
“I guess that’s a ‘no’ then,” Jaehyun muttered. 
Your eyes glanced at his handsome face, then his beautiful, twinkling brown eyes, and finally his soft pink lips. And when they flitted so low, there was no looking back. You leaned in and pressed your lips to Jaehyun’s, waiting for him to kiss back, and when he did without hesitation your heart soared. 
His hands flew to your back, eyes fluttering closed. God, he tasted as good as he smelled, and it was more than a little arousing. You made him fall against his mattress, straddling his hips and kissing him even deeper.
The change was welcome. His heart was racing just from locking lips with you and it took him to the sky. He grabbed a hold of your hips, which fit snugly in his palms, and listened to the soft sighs that slipped from your mouth in between the kisses. 
Mark was probably downstairs wondering, Damn, bitch, how long does it take to piss?
You pulled back when a certain groan of his turned you on a little too much to be safe. Jaehyun was secretly disappointed, but he didn’t complain, taking time to catch his breath. “Is that a maybe?”
You giggled and shook your head. “It’s a yes.”
Jaehyun sat up and grinned. He knew what he was getting himself into, but he didn’t care. There was something about you that made him defy gravity. 
Still straddling his hips, you threaded your fingers through his hair and leaned in to whisper into his ears, “We’re playing with fire.”
“Ironically, I thought the same thing,” Jaehyun deadpanned. 
You chuckled. Well, if you didn’t care, and he didn’t care, nothing more needed to be said. You were really doing this. 
Jaehyun realized that he already really liked holding you. You were warm and soft to the touch, and you fit perfectly in his arms. “Have you been drinking?”
“Nope.”
“Did you do any drugs?”
“Not even a little,” you said, raising a brow at the question. Much to your chagrin, it reminded you of your brother’s incessant worry. “Why?”
Jaehyun said without hesitation, “Because I’ve got weed.”
That was exciting. No wonder Jaehyun never came downstairs during his roommates’ parties. The real party was in his bedroom. “Geez, Dimples. What are you waiting for?”
Jaehyun laughed at your enthusiasm and grabbed his lighter off his nightstand. You were flattered when he let you roll and even more when he praised your technique, which took years to develop. Thank god for your experienced friends. 
The high had you hyper aware of everything. Jaehyun’s whole room smelled like him, to no surprise. As he said, he lived there, fuck’s sake. But it was pleasant and you were honestly forgetting that you even promised to return downstairs.
The guilt and pressure of keeping secrets from Johnny was heavy on your back a few moments ago, but after the marijuana settled in, you relaxed into Jaehyun’s side. He didn’t seem to mind. Maybe it was the tree getting to his brain, but his hands got a little bolder, too. 
And it also only enhanced your curiosity. “Do you do this often, Jaehyun?”
“You mean invite girls into my room to talk and smoke?”
“Yeah.”
Jaehyun took a drag and exhaled into the thick air of his room. “Eh, not really. I’ve had girls in my room before, obviously, but it never really lasts.”
You weren’t surprised. Any girl could see that Jaehyun was handsome as all fucking hell and you didn’t expect him to be a total sexless loser. Matter of fact, if he told you that he was a virgin, you doubted that you’d even believe it. 
“Maybe you haven’t met the right girl then,” you suggested coyly. 
Jaehyun chuckled. “Maybe.”
It was way too soon to ask if he thought you were the right girl, so instead you settled for asking where his interests lay. “What exactly are you looking for?”
Jaehyun knew the answer to that question in perfect detail because he’d thought about it countless times, being his typical hopeless romantic self. This was a boy that dreamed of finding his miss right before he went to bed. He was a simple guy. He wanted picket fences and kids. Perhaps a puppy. 
But maybe it wasn’t all too simple. Jaehyun wasn’t searching for a housewife. He wanted someone to go to random old shops with and look at vintage items together. He wanted someone that didn’t draw a lot of attention, but liked to go outside and explore. Money be damned. Thanks to his mother, he had ample cash, but no one to spend it on. 
Jaehyun hummed, pretending to think about his answer. “Guess.”
You threw him a look. “Are you serious?”
Jaehyun bobbed his head eagerly, lips curling into a mischievous little grin. “I’ll tell you, but I want you to guess first.” 
You sighed and glanced around his bedroom for clues, and fortunately enough, there were plenty. “Vinyls from the nineties. You’re an old soul and you want someone who fits your vibe. You smell like expensive cologne, so maybe you want someone to wine and dine, but you definitely want to be comfortable.”
Jaehyun said nothing, but you could tell that he was listening. 
You looked at the pictures of him and an older woman framed on his nightstand and continued, “You want the type of girl you can take home to your mother. And your mother wants the absolute best for her son, so she raised you to have high standards.”
“You’re good at this,” Jaehyun muttered. 
“I’m nowhere close to being finished,” you said, grinning from ear to ear. “Judging from the souvenirs on your shelf, you like going to different places, so you want someone curious and adventurous in nature. Appreciative and respectful of different peoples' cultures.”
Jaehyun was only smiling at this point. It was kind of funny and spooky being read like this. 
“You’ve searched for love and haven’t found something that feels right, so now you keep girls around for a good time, not a long one. And you love a damsel in distress, I think,” you said, concluding your investigation. 
“Wow,” was all Jaehyun said. 
Though you already knew the answer, you pressed your lips into a smile and asked, “Am I warm?”
“You’re on fire,” he replied, wondering how in the hell you got all that just from looking at his bedroom. “But how did you know?”
“That you love a damsel in distress?”
“That I’ve looked for love and gave up on it.”
You almost rolled your eyes. You couldn’t believe he was seriously asking that question. “No offense, but you scream hopeless romantic. Plus you’re hot. You know your worth and what you want and I doubt it’s meaningless sex.”
Jaehyun had this melancholy look on his face for the briefest of seconds, but it disappeared so quickly you could’ve imagined it being there. 
“I don’t think you gave up, I think you took a little pause. You know she’s out there, and when the time’s right, you’ll know.” Then, you abandoned the sadness and quipped, “But you’re also a guy, and guys want sex.”
Jaehyun chuckled, but you had somehow penetrated his mind. You had part of him figured out and he didn’t know what to do with that. It was too soon to get too deep. 
You exhaled contentedly, but the marijuana had you thinking. You could’ve been wrong about Jaehyun. You had definitely been wrong before. 
There was this tension in the room now that neither of you were equipped to handle. As standard when he was fooling around with a girl, there was a piece of him that wondered if it could be the real thing this time, but he didn’t want to get ahead of himself. 
It wouldn’t have been the first time. 
Jaehyun gave you back the blunt. “What about you - what are you looking for?”
“Who said I was looking?” you asked with obvious amusement. 
That shattered Jaehyun’s former thoughts of possibly wifing you up one day. Of course you didn’t intend on dating the dude your brother hated. It would’ve been a very unconventional relationship. You could keep him around for fun, but it would have to end sooner or later. 
So Jaehyun contentedly resigned himself to the fact that you would pass, just like all the other girls he brought up to his room, and decided he was fine with that. Maybe he had high standards, but you’d forgotten to mention the part that they came with moderate hopes and low expectations.
That way getting hurt was borderline impossible. 
Then, Jaehyun started to grin like an idiot and reminded, “You said that you think I’m hot.”
“I literally said that ten hundred hours ago,” you groaned, exhaling a puff of smoke into the air. 
You cried out in shock when he grabbed your hips and pulled you back onto him again, but instinctively leaned into his shoulder. Jaehyun was (usually) humble, but anyone who thought he didn’t know he was hot was a fool. “Am I hot enough to kiss?”
Your lips tugged into a smile, and rather than directly answer his question, you went in for a kiss, holding the blunt away from his face so that he wouldn’t get burned. Jaehyun effortlessly matched your rhythm and it was dumbfounding how he could be so excellent of a kisser. 
You spent the better half of the night passing a blunt back and forth with Jaehyun, kissing and talking in between (featuring some inappropriate touches). Jaehyun was so fucking easy to talk to, the topics were boundless. Neither of you opened up much outside of your relationship goals and lack thereof, but you still got to know each other a little better. 
Jaehyun loved music from r&b to jazz to soul, though you could’ve guessed how passionate he was after one look at his vinyl collection. He was flirty sometimes, but soft-spoken and very gentleman-like and he never once proposed for the two of you to have sex. Plus he was a bit of a goofball. 
To say nothing of the fact that he could play the guitar. You didn’t know why, but that somehow made him even more delightful. 
It was pleasant to be in the presence of a guy that was simultaneously attractive and respectful.
Because it was far too late for you to drive yourself home when you finally started to get sleepy, he let you steal his bed and slept in the room of one of his roommate’s that was never home, according to Jaehyun. 
Jungkook was what he said his name was. Apparently he basically lived full-time in his girlfriend’s apartment and Jaehyun didn’t know why he still paid rent, but he didn’t complain. It was going to be a sad day for his bank account when Jungkook finally moved out. 
And that left Yugyeom. He was the one that threw all of the parties. You asked Jaehyun last night why he rarely came downstairs during those parties and his response was, “I don’t like the attention.”
Morning had come loudly as ever. Birds chirped outside, singing sweetly. You stretched your arms above your head and yawned, unable to ignore the dark curtains that effectively kept the sunlight out. 
The first thing you did was let a little light in. And the second thing was remember how you spent last night, memories of marijuana and laughter, and flirtatious behavior hitting you all at once. It seemed that Jeong Jaehyun was a promise of fun. 
Grabbing your phone, you headed down the stairs and breathed a little in relief when you saw Jaehyun already awake, waiting by the toaster. “Good morning, Dimples.”
Jaehyun turned when he heard your voice and the smile that spread across his lips was instantaneous. “Good morning, beautiful. How did you sleep?”
“I should’ve known that your bed would be as cool and collected as you are,” you quipped, rubbing your arms. It was colder without Jaehyun’s blankets to help strengthen the temperature. 
Jaehyun shook with mirth and it was a sight you wanted to see more often. 
“I could’ve slept on the sofa,” you said without complaint. “The party was over by the time we called it a night and it’s the most comfortable sofa I’ve ever put my butt on.”
“It goes against everything I believe in to let you sleep on a couch when there’s a perfectly functional bed upstairs.”
“Aw, what a gentleman,” you replied, coming to stand at his side. “I drew the curtains in your room open, by the way. I don’t know how you live like a damn vampire.”
“What’s wrong with living like a vampire? Vampires are cool.”
“I don’t think Vampires need Vitamin D. Humans do,” you retorted, arms crossed. 
Jaehyun’s lips curved into a stupid little smile that reeked of mischief and you instantly knew where his thoughts were before he even said anything. 
You rolled your eyes at his silliness and told him, “Whatever you’re about to say - don’t.”
Bagels popped out of the toaster and the sight of food made Jaehyun forget about his previous shenanigans. He set both bagels on individual plates that already had food and said, “I made you something. It’s not much because I’ve gotta go soon, but I didn’t want you to be hungry.”
“Thank you,” you said with gratitude, accepting the plate he handed to you. Plate in hand, you went to sit at the table, watching Jaehyun bring cups over. 
“You’re welcome,” Jaehyun told you gently. “Next time I’ll make you a real full-course meal as a treat.”
You gawked. “You can cook?”
“A little bit, yeah. Why?”
“You just got so much hotter,” you breathed.
Jaehyun grinned. 
The time you spent together that morning was a duplicate of the night before except there were only the lingering overnight highs instead of the fresh ones. You were sad that you had to leave, but Jaehyun had to work and you needed to go home. 
Sitting in your car, you checked your phone for the first time in hours. There had to be a thousand missed calls and unanswered messages from your friends and Johnny. Though it wasn’t unusual for your phone to be on Do Not Disturb, it was definitely strange to not at least tell your loved ones that you were very much still alive. 
You were just so hooked on Jaehyun that it completely slipped your mind to check your phone. There wasn’t a dull moment upstairs in his bedroom and even when it was silent you were comforted by the sound of a vinyl playing quietly on his record player, which you were stunned that he even had. 
You texted your friends to let them know that you were on the way home and called Johnny to get his usual tantrum out of the way before you got there, but it was safe to say that you weren’t expecting to come back to Johnny and Mark waiting for you in the kitchen like two unhappy parents. 
You reached into the cabinet to grab a glass and deadpanned, “Uh oh. Am I in trouble?”
Mark snickered and he looked like mischief. “Very much so.”
Your gaze flitted towards Johnny, who was clearly the more disgruntled of the two, and asked, “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“You look like you had a long night.”
“That’s probably because I did.”
“Did you hook up with anyone?”
You grimaced. “Gross, Johnny. Do I ask you who and what you do with your dick?”
Johnny gave you a look that told you he was serious. 
“No, I didn’t hook up,” you replied, filling your glass with water and hoping to find a way out of this situation so that you could shower and brush your teeth. 
Johnny’s lips were tugged into a frown. This older brother responsibility was far from easy when his little sister made it even harder to check up on her. “I worry about you. Is that a crime?” 
You exhaled a long breath. “You’re right. I should have at least let you know that I was okay and I didn’t, and I’m sorry. I just got… distracted.”
That got Mark’s attention and he butted in dramatically, “Where did you go last night? I was this close to filing a police report, but it hadn’t been twenty-four hours.”
Typical cop father response. That was half the reason why nobody wanted to deal him drugs. Thank goodness he had you to vouch for him. “And what would you do if I was off with a serial killer instead of some hot guy?”
“I wouldn’t be too worried. You’re annoying. They would return you on the front doorstep with a note that said ‘come get your bitch back.’”
You were tempted to roll your eyes, but you noticed Johnny laugh a little and it honestly made you feel somewhat better. He had been painfully uptight lately and you just wanted him to chill for once. 
“I’m gonna go take a shower and brush my teeth,” you announced, discarding your glass in the sink and heading for the stairs. 
Of course, Mark had more insults on deck and didn’t hesitate to ask, “You’re gonna need more than that for all the cum you had to have gargled last night.”
“For the last time, I did not hook up,” you huffed in exasperation, marching up the stairs. “And get the hell out of my house - you don’t even live here!”
You could hear Mark laughing from the overlook. 
A lot of time was spent counting down the hours until you could see Jeong Jaehyun again. You learned that he was not the type of guy to sit around waiting by his phone. This was a busy man with business to take care of and he didn’t have a lot of spare time. 
You didn’t mind, because he spent it talking to you, which was definitely an indicator that he was starting to really like you. With so few hours in a week, let alone a day, it was hard to believe he let just anyone consume the little downtime that remained. 
Jaehyun let you crash some nights at his place when your brother was being a massive thorn in your side. It wasn’t a crime, but it was easy to get away with, all things considered. Yugyeom never bothered either of you and Jungkook was rarely there, so you spent most of the time talking incessantly and getting high. 
Maybe some kisses were shared in between, but nothing more. Jaehyun was content with just getting to know you for now. His usual invitees consisted of one-night stands and girls he hung out with for a couple of weeks, but you were different. You made him think, high or not, and it was rare a girl penetrated his mind so deeply.
And so quickly. It had only been a month, maybe a little longer. He was still afraid of being completely open with you, but the way the two of you touched each other was starting to get riskier and riskier. 
Kisses lasted longer. More than once, he caught himself going after your clothes, but he didn’t want to seem like an animal. You did seem a little eager too, kissing the breath out of him and getting more and more flirtatious, but Jaehyun hated having to guess. 
He wanted you to tell him what you wanted in no uncertain terms. No room for uncertainty. 
Yugyeom knocked on Jaehyun’s bedroom door, which was already cracked ajar, and asked, “Hey, is she coming over tonight?”
“Yes, so please be on your best behavior. No bullshit,” Jaehyun replied, getting a whiff of the trouble that was Yugyeom and wrinkling his nose. 
“Have you guys… you know?”
“That’s a personal question.”
“So you haven’t.” Yugyeom pressed, “Man, when are you gonna tell her you’ve got the hots for her? You know what, I’ll clear the house and leave a bottle of wine out. Light one of your expensive candles. Girls like that shit.”
Like hell Jaehyun needed advice on how to set the mood, from Yugyeom much less. Plus he was none too pleased at being interrupted, especially because now he was thinking about having sex with you and it was doing things to him down there. “I think I know what girls like.”
“Then what’s the problem? And don’t tell me that you haven’t thought about it. We’re both dudes, man. That’s bullshit.”
“There isn’t one,” Jaehyun replied to his roommate honestly. Of course, he had thought about having sex with you. He might’ve been respectful, but like Yugyeom said, he was still a dude. Hell, the words had come out of your own mouth. 
Yugyeom prodded, “Then?”
“I just don’t wanna rush into it.”
Now that Yugyeom could buy. Jaehyun was sentimental like that. When he really liked a girl, evaluating her worth took priority over getting laid. Jaehyun had this wall of ice put up that even Yugyeom had to steadily break through. Ironically, sometimes it felt like he was still on the outside. 
But he put two and two together. If Jaehyun liked you - as in really, really liked you - then that made shit even more complicated. It was no secret that Johnny had it out for Jaehyun and he obviously came to the same conclusion that Jaehyun had; shit getting serious with you was dangerous. 
So Yugyeom left it alone. 
Like clockwork, you were pulling into Jaehyun’s driveway only a few hours later. You discerned that the lot was empty save for your car and Jaehyun’s which more than likely implied that the two of you would be completely alone in the house together. 
Slipping the spare key from under the mat, you unlocked the door and sang after locking it behind yourself, “Darling, I’m home!”
“I’m upstairs,” Jaehyun called out from the second floor, his room door obviously open for once. The benefits of having the house to himself. 
You didn’t hesitate to make your way upstairs, not failing to clock the bottle of expensive wine on the counter when you passed by the kitchen, but you thought little of it when you came through the hallway and slipped into Jaehyun’s comfortable bedroom. “Hey, Dimples,” you greeted. 
Jaehyun smiled at you and waved. His room was dimly lit. The overhead lights were turned off, but the candles on his nightstand were ablaze and there was an old school classic going on in the background. 
The second you came in, Jaehyun set his book aside, giving you his undivided attention. “Come here.”
You wasted no time doing as told, advancing towards the bed and giggling when he snatched you into his open arms for a handful of kisses. Your whole body was soothed from his slightest of touches, at ease in his arms. Jaehyun had quickly become your second safe place. 
God, you had been waiting for this moment all week. Johnny wasn’t on your ass any more than usual, but it got lonely in that house and it was even worse when you found yourself only craving Jaehyun’s company. There was something happening to you and you couldn’t tell if you liked it or not. 
Jaehyun drew back after a minute, taking a moment to breathe and brush a loose strand of hair behind your ears. “Things okay at home?”
“New topic,” you groaned. 
Jaehyun winced. That couldn’t have been too good. 
“You smell good,” you purred, breathing in his scent. 
“You always say that.”
“Because you always smell good.” 
“I just got out of the shower.”
“Without me?”
“You sound like a guy,” Jaehyun said in disapproval. 
You snickered. You had definitely gotten that comment from a boy before.
Jaehyun’s eyes were fixed to your face, taking in how beautiful you were. Damn, it was like every time he saw you, you looked even more breathtaking. 
You couldn’t help but stare back. Jaehyun’s visuals were out of this damn universe and it was borderline maddening he could be this fucking fine. But deeper than that, sometimes you couldn’t help but stare into his dark eyes and wonder what all he was hiding back there. 
It was plain as day that Jaehyun wasn’t the type to wear his heart on his sleeve, especially not when his romantic feelings were involved. In the time that you’d spent together, you had gotten to learn some things about him, but there was plenty that he filtered out as a defense mechanism. 
When you wanted to get closer, Jaehyun shut down, which was totally ironic, because he was the one that asked if you wanted to get to know him. Now you had to fight for it?
Maybe he meant get to know his body and you were oblivious - and you wouldn’t have minded one bit - but if that was the case, you should’ve already had sex and been out of the picture. Yet he was keeping you twice as long as most girls lasted and for no apparent reason.
Sex made things more complicated. If you had sex with Jaehyun right now, and it was good, there was absolutely no telling how that would shift the trajectory of your entire life. But the way he was looking at you right now tempted you to risk it all. 
Your lips found Jaehyun’s again, but the kiss was different this time. It was needier, desperate. It sent heat stretching through every bone in your body and straight between your thighs, and you felt like you were levitating. Your body scorched with desire, hands running down his chest. 
Jaehyun kept up with your reckless kissing very well, but he couldn’t ignore the nature of it and it made him ask himself questions. You were kissing him like you wanted him. Tired of wondering, he pulled back and asked forthrightly, “Do you want to have sex with me?” 
“Isn’t it obvious?” you countered, quickly seizing the opportunity to return your lips to his.
All of this beating around the bush was getting on his nerves and Jaehyun took matters into his own hands. Literally. You gasped when he pushed you onto your back, pinning you onto his bed, and locked your wrists above your head. “I want to hear you say it.”
Now that was sexy as hell and your thighs involuntarily pressed together. “I want to have sex with you.”
That was all Jaehyun needed to hear. He was quick to catch your lip in between his teeth and seal your lips in another heated kiss, taking in your every trembling exhale. You moaned into his mouth, a little too enamored with how good it felt beneath him. 
His hands released your wrists in favor of your waist, testing the waters. You were reactive to Jaehyun’s touches, hyper aware of his hands steadily falling lower, but not daring to touch you too intimately yet. Like he was waiting for something to happen. 
Jaehyun’s eyes sank to your empty neck and something deep in the pit of his gut was set on fire. “Are marks okay?”
Making quick work of his shirt and tossing it over his shoulders, you nodded your head. “Yeah. Johnny will notice, but he’ll never assume they’re from you.” 
It took absolutely nothing else for Jaehyun to connect his lips to your throat hungrily, leaving mark after mark on your skin in an effort to stake his claim to you. And all it did was turn you on further. There was a thudding between your legs, arousal spilling over. 
Little soft sighs and curses slipped from your lips and you could feel the bedroom get hotter and hotter. It wasn’t as if you and Jaehyun had agreed to be exclusive, but you hadn’t been with anyone else in the time that the two of you had been hanging out, meaning it had been over a month since you’d last had sex. 
And it fucking showed. You were aching for more, on top of your natural desire for Jaehyun. If you didn’t fuck his brains out right now you were going to self-destruct.
“Jaehyun, fuck me,” you groaned impatiently. 
Instead, he grinned, too fond of the neediness in your voice and on your pretty face. Jaehyun looked you plain in the eye and said, “I want you to beg.”
You were too gone to roll your eyes, but not too out of it to retort, “Make me.”
“I’m gonna make you beg, alright,” Jaehyun said without question. He made a move for your shorts and tugged them off your ankles, repeating the gesture with your panties. 
The only thing that kept you from being totally naked was your top but Jaehyun didn’t look too concerned with getting rid of it yet. Instead, he focused his undivided attention between your legs, entranced by your glistening core and his mouth going dry with the desire to have a taste. 
You watched the enthrallment on his face with satisfaction. Funny how his ability to conceal his emotions went out the window when pussy was involved. His eyes were dark as ever and Jaehyun’s voice somehow got deeper when he asked, “Will you let me taste you?” 
“Fuck,” you mumbled, sensing that he was about to wreck the living hell out of you. “Uh, yeah. Yes.”
No room for uncertainty. Now that he had your consent, Jaehyun gathered your legs in his hands, tossed them over his broad shoulders, and went to town. You gasped aloud at the first pass of his tongue at your clit and it couldn’t have been further from tentative. 
Of course this man went straight for your sensitive bundle of nerves instead of your slick folds, he knew better. Given how exciting the thought of Jaehyun dicking you down had been, you were already throbbing, but now you were tense and unstill.
There was something about the feeling of his lips sucking and licking at your cunt that made you squirm and cry out in an overwhelming bolt of pleasure. Jaehyun clamped his big hands onto your thighs to keep you pliant, holding them right where he wanted them, and kept eating you out. 
It made zero sense how hot you found every little thing that he did. 
“Jesus, fuck,” was basically all that you could say. With how vigorously Jaehyun was sucking at your bundle of nerves, it was getting borderline impossible to think. 
Jaehyun sure didn’t seem timid. Matter of fact, the way he refused to shy away from in between your pair of legs, doing everything in his power to keep them separated at both sides of his head, said loud and clear that he was a man on a mission to make you unravel. 
Not to mention that he was doing a damn good job. Your ears were hardly even working, the whole world fading to static, the only audible sound being the incessant throb of your pulse quickening by the minute. 
The sheer opposite was true for Jaehyun. His ears were on full alert and he could hear everything from the increasing volume and speed of your breaths plus your soft moans to the gentle rustling of the trees' leaves outside his open window. 
Jaehyun peered up at you, noticed the euphoria tensing your beautiful features, and his lips broke into a wide grin. “How are you doing up there?”
No words would come. It took twice as long to even process the ones that left his mouth. Your eyes were drooping and misty, damp with moisture, and all that escaped you was a befuddled, “Fuck.”
Jaehyun snickered. That was answer enough. “It sounds to me like you’re having a fun time,” he started. “Do you want to cum?”
You obviously heard that and hissed, “Don’t ask stupid questions.” 
“If you want to cum, then beg me for it,” Jaehyun growled darkly. You appreciated the brief lull of peace, but of fucking course, it was that moment Jaehyun chose to press a long pair of fingers into your dripping pussy.
Your back arched and your soft cries filled the air. It felt like somebody had given Jaehyun the blueprints to your body with how he excelled at satisfying you in ways literally nobody had previously. 
The answer was obvious. Jaehyun wanted you to beg? Fuck it. You would beg. 
“Please,” you said, your voice raising a few pitches. “Oh, god. Please make me cum, Jaehyun.”
Jaehyun didn’t make a sound but you could feel his mouth on your cunt again and knew that he was about to take you there.  
And then it came. The mind-numbing orgasm engulfed you in its fury and you were scarred with burns from head to toe, most of it pivoting towards your core. 
Your hands desperately grasped locks of Jaehyun’s soft fluffy hair in an attempt to anchor yourself and you didn’t release him from your clutches until every tremble faded. Jaehyun got so aroused watching you shudder with release that he swore his own mind went blank. 
It took a good minute and a half at the least for your mind to start to clear itself and you sighed pleasantly as the wrath of your orgasm slowly began to die out. You peered down at Jaehyun, blinking a couple of times, and slackened your grip when you realized how tightly your hands were latched to him.
Jaehyun didn’t seem to mind, contentedly watching you try to gather your bearings. “Are you back to earth?”
“Barely,” you rasped, still unable to feel your thighs. 
“Do you want to stop?”
You gawked. “Are you kidding? I still wanna fuck you. If you still wanna fuck me.”
“I still want to fuck you,” Jaehyun said, pulling you in for another hot but reassuring kiss. It was hard to breathe, but so worth it. You slipped your tongue into his mouth and tasted yourself on his. 
Kissing you made Jaehyun feel like he was ascending, but right now it also made his dick ascend and his patience was steadily dissipating into thin air. You could feel his hard-on against your naked thigh and it sent shock waves to your brain. 
I think that’s the best head I’ve ever had, you admitted to yourself, but not aloud. Your dating history wasn’t top secret but you spoke little of it to Jaehyun. Did it matter that all of your exes were scumbags and rarely bothered to get you off?
Except for one. The sex was good, but it wasn’t a fair trade-off for your heart. No man nor his cock was worth your sanity and you told that to yourself every time you engaged with one. 
Plus you just got this weird feeling where nothing or nobody else mattered when you and Jaehyun were alone together. You didn’t think of the various roots of the stresses in your life and calmness was finally an option. 
You didn’t want to ruin that, so you didn’t get too deep. 
But you were hoping Jaehyun was packing enough to be deep inside of you. Fuck that, you had felt it against your thigh. You knew that he was and it was exciting. 
Your voice was weighed down by the thickness of your breaths. “Do you have condoms?”
“Always,” Jaehyun replied, pulling a drawer open on his nightstand to retrieve one.
That was a relief. You had never done it raw before and though you liked Jaehyun, you weren’t sure where his dick had been and what all it had seen. You’d rather be safe.
Jaehyun gently pushed you back onto the mattress and crawled over you, drawing the condom between his teeth while he tossed your shirt and bra halfway across his bedroom, then whispered, “Tell me how you want it.”
“Hard and deep. Deep and hard,” you confessed sultrily, looking him dead in the eye. 
Jaehyun smirked. “That can be arranged.”
You watched Jaehyun shuffle out of his pants and put the condom on, but the bulk of your attention was set on that thick, girthy cock. Your mouth was watering. Maybe some other time you could suck him off, but right now getting it between your thighs was all you wanted. 
It didn’t seem as if he glanced up, but Jaehyun said, “You’re staring.”
“Sorry.”
“No, you’re not,” Jaehyun said. 
You giggled. “No, I’m not.”
The sound faded when you spread your legs apart invitingly and he penetrated you at an excruciatingly slow pace, sinking deeper inch by fucking inch. 
You and Jaehyun made a sound in harmony when he finally filled you to the hilt, grasping your waist and using it as anchor like he was at risk of going dangerously deep if he made one wrong move and never returning to the surface. 
Good thing it was only the two of you. You, keeping quiet when he was this good with his hands and presumably even better with his thick cock? There was no way in hell. 
“Oh my god…,” you whispered, obsessed with the sensation of being filled. 
Whatever you were thinking right now, Jaehyun wholeheartedly agreed. You made his brain grind to a halt and stutter. “Does that feel okay?”
“More than okay,” you told him, because it was the truth. Somehow the pleasure was only spiking. The ecstasy continued to build. 
You looked so beautiful beneath the golden-yellow hue of his lamplight and Jaehyun knew he would be fantasizing about how your face tensed with pleasure for weeks, if not months.
Jaehyun especially liked the way you were tightening around his cock, gripping it for dear life as if letting go simply wasn’t an option. You wound your legs around his hips and helped draw him into yours in spite of knowing it could ruin you, a telltale sign that your desire for more outweighed any rational thinking. 
It just felt so good that it had to be illegal and though you knew that it wasn’t, it was damn near close. 
There was still music playing from the vinyl player in the background that soothed any and all nerves that you could’ve ever had. You took a moment and inhaled deeply, breathing in the musk of Jaehyun and the scent of the candles. 
Your eyes fluttered closed. It was ironic that you were on a raging high even though you hadn’t even gotten around to having your usual fill of marijuana. In legal terms, you were far from inebriated. But according to yourself? You were fiending for Jaehyun and found him lethally intoxicating. 
His weight on top of you. His deep, guttural grunts in your ear between his jagged breaths. His perfect thrusts and the way he stroked you exactly how you wanted, all the while reaping his pleasure from your body. 
It was fucking mind-blowing. 
Jaehyun had a similar thought and it tore a noise out of him. His intentions in inviting you over tonight weren’t to have sex, in spite of his roommate’s attempts at getting him to get laid when he was only trying to break you in, but it was an unregrettable decision. 
“You take it so good, baby,” Jaehyun said tenderly, but it barely scratched the tip of the iceberg of praises he had in storage especially for you. 
Fuck, you wanted to hate how easy it was for him to kindle these rash flames inside of you, but your attraction to Jaehyun became undeniable the second you initiated the first rendezvous. 
You were peering into Jaehyun’s soul, searching his whole face without knowing what you were looking for, and saw the euphoria fluttering his eyes closed and spreading his lips apart just enough for those heavenly sounds to slip through. 
You guessed you found it then, because the tightening in the pit of your gut was at an all-time high and it wasn’t skipping out on the extremes. 
Combing your hands through his hair, you whimpered, “I’m so close.”
Jaehyun accelerated his pace, wanting to take you to the ends of the earth and back. You noticed, because you could feel his hard dick slapping against your hips with a purpose, and you swore to god your eyes rolled somewhere black. 
The end was creeping up on you from behind. You could feel it. Jaehyun could feel it himself, the telltale twitch of his cock indicating that he was pushing his limits. 
“I want you to cum,” Jaehyun growled in no uncertain terms, his tone dominant. “Nice and hard. Can you do that for me, baby?”
“Yes,” you choked out. 
If you were being frank, he didn’t even have to ask. It was impossible to hide the evidence of your impending orgasm, the heightened tremors in your voice and the shakiness in your body were more than enough proof. 
All you could think about was how restlessly you were going after this orgasm and how terribly you needed it like it would fix every little thing going wrong in your life.
Your hands slipped from Jaehyun’s hair to his shoulders to finally his back, raking your nails down the flesh in a set of ministrations that were bound to leave red lines, and you rasped breathlessly, “Finish me.”
The hoarseness of your voice alone could’ve broken Jaehyun but he hung on for your sake, fingertips flitting to your sensitive, swollen clit again because he knew he wouldn’t last very much longer. 
You were even more restless than before and it wasn’t long until Jaehyun granted your wish, your lips parting in a scream and your vision going totally black. Your toes curled into tight bends as you grinded your hips into Jaehyun, milking your release for every damn dime.
Jaehyun could feel you clenching rapidly and repeatedly around his cock and merely seconds after that it was game over. He came with the deepest, sexiest groan you had ever heard before in your life, hips stuttering as his cum filled the condom, and all you could think about was how this could not be a one-time thing. 
The next few minutes were a blur. You only recalled Jaehyun peeling off you to dispose of the condom, the layers of sweat on your naked bodies keeping you connected, and returning to your side briefly. 
Jaehyun scanned you for any signs of obvious discomfort. “Are you okay?”
Your mouth was hanging open, aggressive pants falling from your lips, but Jaehyun’s attention was no longer focused on your heaving chest - it was on you. “No, more like incredible.”
That had Jaehyun in the first half, but he snickered in amusement and relief when you wrapped up your sentence. “Do you wanna shower with me?”
“That’s kinda intimate,” you said, as if that was actually going to stop you. “Hell yeah, I do.”
Jaehyun rolled his eyes, but there was a smile plain as day on his face. You cried out in surprise when he hauled you into his burly arms, hooking one of them under your knees, and carried you into his bathroom. 
Your own individual toothbrush was in there on the sink counter squarely beside Jaehyun’s. It was only right that he let you keep one there, given how many late Friday nights you spent at his house instead of your own. 
Plus some of your clothes were there, tucked into his drawers, but when you returned to his bedroom, you donned one of his shirts that was unsurprisingly oversized on you. 
You sat on Jaehyun’s bed, memories of what you’d just done on his sheets still fresh, and watched him rifling through his vinyl catalog, but because he was shirtless you quickly got distracted by the view you had of his back. 
At least until he turned around after setting the vinyl on his record player, apparently oblivious, and coming to sit at your side. 
There was mischief on your face and you were struggling to stifle a giggle. It was obvious, and Jaehyun furrowed his brows. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Oh, nothing.”
Jaehyun didn’t believe you at all, but he didn’t press. 
You sighed contentedly, leaning into his naked chest. The little voice in your brain was thinking about how he smelled so clean and fresh, and good. Well, duh, she snapped. If you somehow weren’t paying attention, he just got out of the shower. 
But you were definitely paying attention, maybe a little more than you should’ve. It wasn’t your fault he looked like the leading role of every romance book ever. This was a man out of every little girls’ childhood dreams and, more importantly, every grown woman’s wet ones. 
As Jaehyun held you in his arms, you couldn’t help but think, spotting little items in his room that screamed, I come from money. “Jaehyun, is it okay if I ask you a question?”
Jaehyun hummed. You figured he might’ve been close to dozing off, but in reality, he was just captivated by the smell of your hair and hoping it lingered on his pillows. 
“You’re pretty well-off, but you live with two other guys. You’re technically always alone, but you don’t live alone. Why?”
Now that wasn’t what Jaehyun was expecting you to ask him, but you were full of surprises. He took a moment to ponder his answer, finding himself reflecting. “It’s because of how I grew up, I guess. I was the only child, so it was just me and my parents in the house. I guess I kind of wanted to know what it's like to have brothers.”
You made a noise of content. “You’re close then.”
“Yup.” 
You could feel Jaehyun playing with your hair and it made you smile gently.
“What about you and your friends?”
“What about them?”
“What’s the relationship like? Have you fucked Mark?”
You were taken aback, though rather than be affronted, the ridiculousness of that question made you laugh. “No way. I prefer my vagina itch-free,” you quipped. 
Jaehyun chuckled. It was a shock that that kid got around town the way he did, but that was why Jaehyun had to respect the hustle. 
Then, out of nowhere, you got a little sober. “On a serious note, Mark is my bestie and he’s what I imagine having a little brother is like. Johnny really likes him too, so sometimes I’ll walk in on them hanging out without me.”
You didn’t notice the way Jaehyun’s head bobbed along, but he was listening. It was believable. Mark was a social butterfly and impossible to dislike, no matter how irritating. 
And he was only irritating to some. Those who didn’t find him to be a thorn in their side probably wanted him a number of inches deep in their guts. 
You continued, “Yuta is more Johnny’s friend than he is mine, but he’s laidback. Haechan is a little shit but he’s funny as fuck. And you know Jeno is chaotic as ever.”
You were fond of your circles of friends. Most folks assumed it must’ve been suffocating to be the only girl amongst a group of insufferable horny dudes, but it wasn’t half bad. Jeno had tried to get into your pants before, but when you turned him down he took the rejection coolly. 
Mark, like you said, was like a sibling to you and that went both ways. When somebody suggested the two of you hook up, his knee-jerk reaction was to hiss, “Ew!”
Haechan was a slut like all of them but he knew better than to slut himself out to you and Yuta, though you already couldn’t have been further from his type, was one of your older brother’s closest friends. According to Yuta himself, the thought of being in a relationship with you was hilarious. 
Never mind the fact that he admitted he’d actually do it, but strictly for fun. Pissing off Johnny was his full-time job and dating his younger sister? It would’ve been the easiest way. 
You and Jaehyun chatted until you couldn’t ignore each other’s incessant yawns and made the mutual agreement to crawl under the sheets together. A rare Jungkook appearance one weekend forced you into bed with each other and ever since that was how you’d slept. 
Side by side, skin to skin. 
The sun was brighter than ever when you woke up some hours later. You noticed that the curtains were open. And they had been since you likened Jaehyun to a vampire.
Speaking of Jaehyun, he was still sleeping like a rock beside you, completely still other than the gentle heave of his chest as he snored quietly. You crawled gingerly out of bed so as not to disturb his rest, the sight of him still asleep when you stood making you sigh out in relief. 
After a quick wash-up in the bathroom, you headed downstairs for a snack. Your stomach was rumbling and you realized that you hadn’t eaten since you left home. 
What you didn’t expect was to see Yugyeom half-naked in the kitchen though. 
You weren’t sure why. It was his house and if he wanted to walk around like he just went skinny dipping, then he had that right. Fortunately, he was wearing sweatpants, so you were spared from that unsightly picture. 
Yugyeom heard your footsteps and turned. “Oh, hey. Sleep good?”
“I only slept for a few hours,” you confessed, though you felt like you were quite well-rested. “But yeah, I slept pretty good.”
Yugyeom chuckled. “I bet.”
You said nothing else. Yugyeom wasn’t a total stranger, even before you started crashing at his house, but you weren’t close by any means. 
“I didn’t think you’d be here,” you said after a pause, straddling a barstool. 
“I mean, I do live here. Who do you think pays most of the bills?”
“Jaehyun,” you chirped. 
“Okay, that’s fair. Who do you think pays the second most of the bills?”
“You and Jungkook, but it wasn’t always that way.”
Yugyeom threw in the towel, realizing Jaehyun had most definitely had this discussion with you at some point. Then, he started to laugh. Jaehyun was discussing their finances with you? There was no way in living hell. 
I’ll be damned. Yugyeomed sighed in amusement. “You know, you’re the first girl I’ve seen last this long with Jaehyun.”
“Oh?”
“I’m not saying he’s a player, but I thought I’d stop seeing you around here, like, two weeks ago. For a girl to survive a month with him, she has to really crank up his brain. And Jaehyun isn’t easily impressed,” Yugyeom said. 
It was obvious what he was implying and you knew exactly where this was heading. “I’m sure, but Jaehyun and I are just vibing.”
“I didn’t say that you weren’t.”
“Yes, but you think that we aren’t,” you replied, rubbing your arms. It was always cold the mornings after. 
Yugyeom laughed. “No, I don’t. Not right now. I didn't even crack Jaehyun that soon. All I’m saying is Jaehyun is a real gem and I think that you have a solid chance.”
“And you want me to take it?”
Yugyeom was strategically bouncing around, going from subtly planting ideas in your head to making them seem as if they were your own. “Whatever you do with that information is out of my hands and none of my business.”
Your lips parted to speak, but you were fortunately saved by the bell. Footsteps were heard from the hall and Jaehyun emerged from around the corner, voice deep from sleep, “What are you two talking about?”
Yugyeom lied without hesitation, “How handsome you are, of course.”
Jaehyun didn’t believe it for a second, but he stole the barstool beside you and gently nudged your elbow. “You think I’m handsome?”
“Oh, the handsomest,” you deadpanned, but rested your head onto his shoulder. 
Jaehyun let you. At least for a little while, but then he pulled you into his chest and mumbled groggily, “You left me.”
“I’m sorry,” you whispered, your hands tangled into his dark hair. “I’ll stay next time.”
“Good.”
Yugyeom was peering into the fridge, shaking his head, wondering if he was the only one that saw your fate. 
The whole weekend was spent in Jaehyun’s arms, restless. If you weren’t getting high on marijuana and chatting about whatever came to mind, you were dancing to one of his vinyls. If you weren’t kissing each other breathless, you were fucking each other senseless. 
It was two days of whimsical fun, ignoring the world and its insignificant little woes. In many ways, Jaehyun was like your oasis.
You were starting to hate Mondays. They were the days where you realized that nothing was forever, every time without fail. The days you had to finally face the world after a weekend of neglecting its existence. 
Plus you didn’t get a lot of Jaehyun during the other five days of the week, and though you understood your conflicting schedules, it was getting less and less easy to cope. 
Finals week thankfully gave you less time to think about whatever the hell was blossoming between you and Jaehyun. You didn’t want to think about it, because you were well aware that it wouldn’t last. As perfectly as Jaehyun molded into you, there was no piece of him that fit the bigger picture. 
But of course, you were pacing down your school’s courtyard with a bag slung over your shoulder when you noticed Mark’s footsteps catching up to you. “Wanna tell me why Johnny asked me if you’ve been going out with somebody lately?” he asked.
You pretended to be oblivious, keeping your head straight and your steps quick. “Why would he ask you that?”
“Because I’m your best friend and you tell me everything, or so I thought,” Mark hissed.
You groaned, weighing your options. You could keep this private love affair to yourself and let the guilt and pressure split you down the middle, or you could confide in your best friend and hope it took the edge off. 
Pulling Mark behind a tree and scanning your surroundings for unwanted bystanders, you exhaled roughly and said, “Don’t freak out, but I may or may not be sleeping with Jeong Jaehyun on the weekends.”
Mark was understandably dumbfounded by that information and screeched aloud, “What the fuck, dude?”
“I just said don’t freak out!”
Mark shook his head, the total opposite of cool and collected. There was no way in hell he wasn’t going to freak out. “Are you kidding? Johnny literally wants to kill him.”
“God, I know,” you bemoaned, pressing a palm to your forehead. This whole situation combined with the stress of finals was giving you a splitting headache. 
The shock was still evident on Mark’s face, but he seemed to be cooling off. “Shit, dude. This is crazy. Is the sex at least good?”
Your mind was fluttering with memories and it was hard to resist a smile. Getting laid right now would probably fix you. “Jeong Jaehyun may be a scoundrel for whatever reason, but I can reassure you he is not lacking in the sex department.”
Or any department. It was strange that in the weeks the two of you had spent bonding and the like, you had yet to identify a single red flag of Jaehyun’s. Apparently, the weirdest thing about this boy was the amount of pictures he kept of his toes. 
“Oh my god,” Mark gasped. 
“What?”
“That night you went upstairs to pee and didn’t come back,” Mark started, finally connecting the dots and displeased he hadn’t seen the hints earlier. “You were off screwing Jaehyun, weren’t you?”
“Actually, no. I was with him, yes, but we weren’t hooking up then.”
Mark was baffled to very fucking his core. That had to be half a decade ago. This whole time, you were spending your spare time on Jaehyun and nobody knew?
Gripping Mark by the shoulders, you stared into his eyes and said sternly, “Listen. You can’t tell Johnny.”
Your best friend made a face of disapproval, but nodded his head. “Alright. Fine.”
“I’m serious. You have to promise.”
Mark groaned, “Dude, I’m not gonna tell Johnny that you’re fucking Jaehyun. No matter how bizarre and borderline batshit insane that is to say aloud. I promise your secret is safe with me.”
You released his shoulders and a shaky breath, relenting. “Okay.”
“But that doesn’t mean that I approve.”
“Understandable. I can live with that.”
“I don’t see how,” Mark grumbled under his breath. 
You frowned. 
Months flew by. Christmas and News Year were a blur, two events you and Jaehyun spent at separate locations. Your parents were rarely home, but the winter holidays were a period of time that they always made sure to be around for. And Jaehyun paid his family a visit that week. 
But then it was February, and the national holiday that was Jaehyun’s birthday came of nowhere. 
“No way you were born on Valentine’s day,” you remembered telling him a few months back after asking him about his birthday. Jaehyun had groaned, more than accustomed to how this conversation played out. This was far from his first rodeo. 
Though it was rare that a girl made it to actually celebrate his birthday with him. 
Idiotically, you found yourself scorching with nerves that afternoon, overwhelmingly anxious. Your whole body was tense and you paced around your room antsily for hours until it was time to get in your car and head out to Jaehyun’s house. 
You had gotten him a gift and you weren’t sure whether he would like it or not. Then again, you had spent weeks planning what you would give him based on every second of every little conversation you’d shared and you were half confident, half uncertain. 
Jungkook opened the door to leave at the same moment you were preparing yourself to go inside, most likely heading to his girlfriend’s place after spending the morning celebrating his friend’s birthday, and held the door open for you. “Uh, do you need a minute?”
“No. Thank you,” you replied bashfully, catching the door and finally turning inside. 
You took one more deep breath and paced upstairs while gripping the box in your hands so tightly it might’ve broken. 
Jaehyun was sitting on his bed, his guitar in his hands instead of standing upright in the corner of his bedroom as typical, and glanced up when he heard your footsteps. “Hi.”
“Hi, birthday boy,” you greeted. 
Jaehyun was smiling. You had already wished him a happy birthday at midnight on the dot which was a sweet gesture in itself. 
“I, uh, got you something,” you said, mentally cursing yourself for sounding so nervous. 
“I can see that.” Jaehyun set his guitar aside. There was curiosity in his stare, but he whispered, “You didn’t have to.”
“But I wanted to. You’re my… friend,” you told him awkwardly, handing over the gift before it made you say something stupid. “I didn’t know what to get a guy who has literally everything he wants, but I tried.”
Jaehyun accepted the gift box graciously, peeling off the wrap, and said, “Whatever you got me is more than enough, baby.”
You sure hoped so. You didn’t spend the past few weeks stressing over this very moment for nothing. You wanted to give him something thoughtful and memorable. 
Anticipation made your heart sound like thunder. You fidgeted, twiddling your thumbs as Jaehyun slowly opened the box, retrieving a guitar strap alongside a couple of other items. The awe that tensed Jaehyun’s features was authentic and your heart was taut with giddiness when his lips tugged into a beaming smile. 
A few words scribbled onto the guitar strap caught Jaehyun’s attention and he unhesitatingly pulled them closer to his face to get a better look. It was like a little note, but words only you would say. Play me till the end. 
“Wow,” Jaehyun whispered, feeling a thumping inside of his ribcage. “You… I literally mentioned that I wanted one of these in passing.”
“When you talk, I listen.”
Jaehyun’s eyes met yours. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” you murmured, straddling his lap and tossing your arms around his neck. “Happy birthday, baby.”
Jaehyun set his hands at your hips and kissed you restlessly, restraint taking the backseat as he absorbed every bit of your warmth and used it to fuel his fire. Your lips took him to the other side but your hands kept him grounded. 
Things felt different now. Kissing Jaehyun had never not been spellbinding, but right now? The feeling in your chest was indescribably hot. 
But it was dangerous and terrifying. It defied everything you told yourself to be true, and every principle you had laid out. This was deeper than building a relationship with the enemy. It was the intimacy that accompanied trusting another guy with your heart, and fighting the unshakable doubts. 
You had built something of a friendship with Jaehyun. Friends that occasionally kissed and felt each other up and had hooked up more than once. 
But what if you wanted more? What if you were really two star-crossed lovers that couldn’t have each other? What if?
Jaehyun wondered if your feelings had gotten as tense as his were. Months ago, he was telling himself not to get too close to you because of who your brother was and your clear lack of romantic intentions, but no amount of walls he put up could’ve prevented his feelings from getting this deep. 
You wouldn’t tell him even if they had. What good would it have done for him to know that you loved him, but you couldn’t have him? 
When Jaehyun pulled back, he stared into your eyes, not at your lips. “Let’s go make hot cocoa,” he said after a pause.
You blinked in surprise, but Jaehyun was already tugging you along before you could even think. 
The time in the kitchen together was a beautiful mess. You liked randomly bursting out into song and Jaehyun liked dancing, which ultimately turned into him tenderly cradling you there in his arms and mumbling into your ear, the hot cocoa all but forgotten. 
You especially liked the toasty smell of a hot, creamy mug of hot chocolate. It was very Jaehyun-like. The winter seasons in general were reminiscent of his personality, not because he was cold (like some people assumed), but the sheer opposite. 
Jaehyun was the warmest guy that you had ever met, in a way. Anyone who said otherwise didn’t have the privilege of knowing him, but you? You liked to think that you had him all figured out.
Maybe there was a chance you did to an extent. Getting to know him over the course of these long months had definitely shifted your previous perspective. Jaehyun kept to himself because he was afraid of his vulnerability being used as a weapon, but when you broke those stubborn barriers, you saw that Jaehyun was just a guy that wanted a home. 
He had one, metaphorically speaking, but no one to share it between. That was why you used to think he was shy, and why others thought he was cold. Jaehyun wanted to protect the home he’d built for himself and was reluctant to let others in, because he wanted it to be sturdy for the ones he would let stay.  
A hopeless romantic to his core. 
After making sure the kitchen was tidy, Jaehyun led you away to the infamous white couch that stretched along his living room wall. Your favorite spot in the whole house. Aside from his bedroom, of course.
Jaehyun, on the other hand, couldn’t decide. Half of it was littered in a slew of memories of you and his whole bedroom smelled more like you than it did himself now. Picking a favorite would be an impossible choice. 
There was a lull of silence as the two of you sipped from your mugs, but it wasn’t an issue. The silence was always comfortable with Jaehyun, as well as literally everything else about him. 
Though you didn’t notice, the weird thing now was that Jaehyun was less secure. He didn’t make it obvious, but he was remarkably nervous. Jaehyun tried to cloak his nerves when he said, “I kind of got you something, too.”
Your eyes went wide with shock. “You got me something… for your birthday?”
“I mean, yeah. It’s also Valentine’s day and you’re… important to me,” Jaehyun confessed softly, a tiny smile breaking out onto his lips. 
“I am?”
“You are,” he whispered, hurriedly reaching into his pockets for something. Imagine your surprise when he dropped a USB drive into the palm of your hand. “Stick it into your computer when you get home.”
You nodded obediently, sitting it on the coffee table so that it wouldn’t be crushed in your jeans, but your innate curiosity was never satisfied and you asked, “What’s on it?”
“A surprise,” was all Jaehhyun said. 
You hummed. If Jaehyun didn’t want to tell you, you knew it would be pointless to press. 
But you would be lying if you said that it wasn’t killing you. 
Jaehyun knew that. He knew you were a curious individual, because he was drawn to your insatiable need to know. But he didn’t want to be there to see your reaction. Just looking at you made his chest taut and rejection’s brutal fangs still ripped him to shreds. 
At least you couldn’t tell by looking at him. Jaehyun had made sure of that. “Talk to me,” he said, squeezing your hand. 
You smiled, because his hands were warm from the hot cocoa. “About what?”
“Tell me more about yourself. It’s been months, but I feel like there’s still more to know about you. Talk to me about what you love. Your hopes and dreams.”
A little sigh left you. “Where do I even begin?” That was what you said, but you’d already continued without affording yourself any time to pause. “I want to be an orthopedic surgeon. I’m obsessed with anatomy and how our bodies function. That’s why I’ve been busting my ass for grad school.”
That much was obvious. Anybody that saw you on the party scene might’ve assumed you were merely another hopeless college student who only knew hooking up and getting shit-faced drunk, but Jaehyun’s first time seeing you was in the back of a library with a laptop and a heap of textbooks. 
You were a hard-worker and no hangover stood a chance between you and your goals. But you were also just a normal girl who wanted to let loose sometimes. It was the perfect balance. 
Jaehyun was a keen listener. “That sounds tough.”
You fought a groan. “God, yes. But it’s so worth it. It’s my senior year and I’ve been waiting my whole life for med school.”
“You’ve wanted to be a surgeon for that long?”
“I’ve always known who I wanted to be,” you exhaled contentedly. And for that you were endlessly grateful. “What about you?”
Jaehyun shook his head. “No. Not always. First, I guess I had to leave home and do the whole ‘finding yourself’ thing.”
“There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s rare that people are born with an innate sense of who they are. We deserve to live life through trial and error. That’s freedom,” you said.
Jaehyun wholeheartedly agreed. Leaving home to explore his identity might’ve been the toughest decision he ever made, but also the best one. “What about love?”
“What about it?”
“Did you ever dream of that, too?”
You should’ve figured he would go there. It was the essential question. The world of trauma beyond your control. “I used to,” you admitted, somber. “I just haven’t had a ton of faith in it lately. That’s what happens when you grow up, I think. You realize life’s not like the movies.”
Funny how I call you a hopeless romantic when hopeless romantics are anything but hopeless. In spite of the pain and the betrayal, they refuse to accept that they might die alone one day. If anything, I’m the hopeless one. I’ve fallen in love with the one boy I could never make mine. 
Jaehyun frowned for a split second, but recovered quickly. “Yeah, I know.”
You wondered who had hurt him, but chose not to ask. If he wanted to tell you, then he already would’ve. 
“You didn’t ask me,” Jaehyun started. 
You glanced up at him. 
“About my pain,” he continued shortly. “About her.”
“I didn’t think you were ready.”
“Do you want to know?”
“I mean, yeah. Of course, I want to know who hurt you and how that made you who you are. I want to understand you. But only as much as you want me to,” you told him. The truth was that as curious as you were, you were afraid of overstepping. The same way that Jaehyun was terrified of oversharing. 
He replied with total certainty, “I want you to know.”
You swallowed, feeling a lump form in your throat and unsure why. It was his deep, dark secrets being revealed, not yours. Plus you were positive there wasn’t a single person in the county who didn’t know your history with your one and only ex. “Okay. Take your time.”
Jaehyun heaved a shaky breath, preparing himself to share something that he’d never specifically told anyone. “Back home in Seoul, I dated a girl. I was naive and I thought she was the one. But she wasn’t. She only wanted a guy handsome enough to impress her parents.”
You maintained eye contact to let Jaehyun know you were listening. 
Jaehyun continued, “I guess we had different desires in life. She wanted a boy to show off and I wanted a girl who was my best friend at the foundation. We only talked about surface things. I couldn’t be myself around her.”
You nodded. That sounded like the Jaehyun you knew. 
“Then, I found out she was cheating on me,” Jaehyun added calmly, but he still recalled the trembles of anger that wrecked through his body. “And I left her then and there. I dipped. I might’ve been a naive idiot, but I knew my worth. She was my first and my last.”
You were shocked. That you shared the same pain - an unfaithful partner - and that Jaehyun hadn’t had nearly as many other partners as you thought he would’ve. “You’ve only dated once?”
“For me, once was enough to figure out what I wanted in a relationship, and it wasn’t a girl who I could barely trust or be myself with,” Jaehyun said. “I talked to other girls, but like I said before, nothing lasted, and I’ve obviously hooked up.”
Ironically, I’ve been hurt more by girls I never had than a girl that was supposed to belong to me. 
“I harbored resentment for a long time, but what lasted longer was the leftover fear of trusting someone again. I only let people see what I want them to see. And because of that, I’m a little lonely sometimes, but it’s okay.”
“Does it get sad?” you asked quietly. 
Jaehyun shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe, but it’s better than being heartbroken. Anyways, I’ve gotten better about inviting people into my life and having good judgment. Time makes it easier.”
You make it easier, was what he meant, but Jaehyun wasn’t that bold yet. He might have been the one to approach you and attempt to initiate this private affair, but you sticking around was the last thing he expected. And that opened the door for the possibility that relationships didn’t have expiration dates. 
Reading between the lines, you were hoping that somewhere along them he wasn’t hinting about a potential future with you. Jaehyun’s head was in the clouds, but you were grounded below the surface. Because you had already resigned yourself to the fact that you didn’t have a future together.
But of course, that never stopped you from letting him undress you. 
You were hyper aware of Jaehyun’s eyes staring into yours and it was beginning to unnerve you a little. “Is there hot cocoa on my face?”
Jaehyun shook his head with a cute laugh and finally leaned into you for a kiss, obviously done speaking and prepared to show. You let him take you down onto the couch, laid defenseless beneath him, on the edge of surrender. 
You giggled into his lips, pleased at how silly it was that he tasted like the hot drink you’d shared. Your hands were wound through his hair and tugging him closer to you, wanting to be inseparable. You wouldn’t be sated till his soul was tied to yours. 
When it came to your body, you were more than inclined to let Jaehyun dominate you. But your heart was more than you had bargained for. 
Jaehyun yanked at the waistband of your sweatpants and you swore you could sense your heart swelling with the exhilaration of getting laid by the only guy you wanted. You raised your hips, letting him take them and your underwear from underneath you. 
You gasped loudly when his fingers ghosted along the insides of your thighs and unhurriedly traveled to your core, which was throbbing at the barest of touches. Jaehyun made you ache. Your body neglected every thought that didn’t concern him when it longed for him to use it until you were sore. 
Jaehyun sucked a slick pair of fingers into his mouth fleetingly before inserting them inside your pussy, making you verbally respond to the contact with a soft whimper, and stole the sound right from your lips with a hot wet kiss. You only tightened around his digits when he pressed his lips to you and it made his head spin quicker than ever. 
You pulled back and panted, “So, you won’t let me sleep on the couch, but you’ll fuck me on it?”
“It’s seen worse days,” Jaehyun said, muting the sound of his own chuckle when he pressed his mouth to your neck. 
You were torn between a laugh and a moan and the final sound was a breathy whimper of Jaehyun’s name. His mouth felt too good on your neck and you couldn’t forget his hands between your parted legs. Gentleman in the streets, but a beast in the sheets. 
Jaehyun was touching you impatiently. Your exhales were loud and jagged when he pulled back from your stained throat, and Jaehyun couldn’t help but imagine the noises you would make when he was finally seated deeply inside of your pussy that was clenching around his long slender digits. 
Deciding you were wet enough to take his cock, Jaehyun recouped his hand from between your thighs and asked, “You ready for me, baby?”
“More than,” you whispered, disgruntled with the emptiness but consoled by the knowledge that you would be full of him momentarily. 
Jaehyun stepped out of his clothes without hesitation and got a hold of your naked legs, dragging you toward him and leaving no room for empty space. The two of you locked eyes when he finally started to penetrate you and he looked at you with need. But you glanced away. You couldn’t stare into his soul as he captured yours. You couldn’t do it. 
You moaned when he pushed the head of his cock through your entrance and again when it went as deeply as it could enter. The stretch was so mad, but so good. You never knew how closely the pain could be interlocked to pleasure before Jaehyun took you for a spin on his big cock.
Jaehyun pulled out with a disgruntled groan, stealing the pleasure before you could really soak in the sensation. 
You winced your eyes open and asked confusedly, “Why did you do that?”
“I forgot a condom,” Jaehyun admitted bashfully, a timid little glint in his stare. 
“Gee, you sure chose a fantastic time to remember,” you deadpanned. 
Jaehyun looked like he was a little ashamed and it amused the hell out of you. In the heat of your vice-like cunt, he’d lost track of all thoughts other than getting his cock inside. 
You gawked when he stood and you caught an eyeful of his cute butt when he turned for the stairs. “Where are you going?”
Like it was the most obvious thing in the whole world, Jaehyun replied nonchalantly, “To get a condom.”
“Sit your cute ass down,” you told him a bit too assertively. “You can have me raw.” 
Jaehyun looked like his brain short-circuited. “For real?”
You nodded. “Yes, for real, you dummy. Just pull out.”
Jaehyun combed his fingers through his hair and groaned, “That’s one hell of a responsibility, woman.”
You purred teasingly, “Are you scared you won’t be able to do it, or are you scared that you’ll bust too fast?”
Jaehyun’s eyes fell to your gorgeous, spread legs, thickly swallowing the lump in his throat at the mouth-watering sight of you laid bare and exposed as you waited for him to take you. Fuck. Maybe both.
You snickered to yourself. Unbeknownst to Jaehyun, you were on birth control. And you had no intention of telling him right now. You wanted to gauge his restraint. 
Jaehyun didn’t reply, but he did return to the couch to slip between your folds again, and that was even better. Your pussy throbbed tirelessly, missing the way his thick cock stretched you out, and it drew deep grunts from the very back edge of Jaehyun’s throat. 
You could feel every inch of him pressed deep inside your pulsing walls, flush against you. All of him. There was literally nothing to separate the two of you, exactly as you had wanted, only the heat and tightness of your cunt suffocating his cock relentlessly. 
Jaehyun loved how you took him like a fucking champ. You sucked his cock back in like you needed it, like you needed him just as badly as he needed you. Your eyes winced closed and your lips parted as you sang his name in a shrill whimper. 
You were rapt with ecstasy at his long, deep thrusts that took you to the moon. The pain and guilty thoughts disappeared into his slow yet steady rhythm, as if Jaehyun wanted to make sure you could feel every bit of himself that he had to offer. 
Like he was making love to you.
“You’re so beautiful. I’m in love with your body,” Jaehyun whispered gently into your ear, hooked on you.
You moaned, oblivious to the fact that he really meant he was in love with you. When your naked bodies were bursting with heat and satisfaction, meeting each other in a wet collision, all else ceased to matter. 
Jaehyun kissed you again. You swore he stole the pulse right from your chest in that very moment, your heart open to him. His hands were everywhere, tenderly cupping your breasts and thumbing your stiff nipples. This was pleasure. This was elysian. This was all yours.
You were breathless when the two of you separated and the minutes of your lips tangled together felt like mere seconds. God, Jaehyun made you insatiable. As you did to him. The two of you couldn’t get enough, not of the sex and not of each other. It was lethally dangerous to want something as badly as you both wanted one another. 
But you knew that when you laid eyes on him, when you indulged him. You knew that he was endless trouble and yet you crept into his arms anyway like a moth to the flame. 
“God, fuck,” you rasped, throat hoarse from how you were screeching his name. “You make me feel so good.”
Jaehyun was so gentle and affectionate with you, tickling kisses down every bit of your soft skin his lips could access. It was times like these, when he completed you perfectly, where you welcomed the thought that you were made for each other. And only for each other. 
Your mouth was dry, open with every halfway cry of Jaehyun’s name that you could manage. Your skin was damp and sticky with moisture, a thin layer of sweat keeping his skin adhering to yours. Of course, there was a similar glistening sheen dripping down Jaehyun, beading at his forehead and neck. 
It made you lick your chapped lips. This man was abundantly mouth-watering. You wanted to give him anything he wanted and in this sex-induced haze, you knew that you would have. 
Jaehyun noticed your eyes fixated on literally anywhere but his face and it made him chuckle smugly. He craned his head downwards to nibble beneath your ear and groan praises about how perfect and tight you were around his cock. 
You tangled your hands in his hair again, desperate to ground yourself, before sitting them at his handsome broad shoulders. He had no business being this good at touching and fucking you. You were downright ashamed of the noises that left your lips but made no attempts to block the pleasure causing them to slip into the dense air. 
“Like that. Fuck, I’m gonna cum, Jay,” you whimpered, squeezing his shoulders. 
The thought of you releasing around his bare cock made a shudder shoot through Jaehyun and he almost couldn’t take it. You sensed his pace getting a little rougher, as if he was out to get you. Out to finish you. “Look at me,” he growled. 
You did. You didn’t have any other options. Not when it was him bleeding you dry, making your body dependent on his touches.
Looking into his dark eyes, everything stopped. The whole world was set on pause. You almost couldn’t breathe. This was how it felt to fall with no anchor.
“I want you to cum on my cock,” Jaehyun said lowly, rutting into you at a dangerous pace. 
You nodded. You were completely submissive to his desires.
There was a throbbing pressure in your gut that only got harsher with every wet smack of Jaehyun’s hips into yours. You wound your legs around his waist and pulled him into you, wanting to fuse together your limbs. 
Your body felt as if it were on fire. The sweat cooling down your neck, the lack of oxygen in the air. The breaths Jaehyun snatched plain from your lips. It was more than enough to take you out. 
Jaehyun watched as your orgasm finally seized you in its open arms, taking you by surprise. Your abs tensed viciously and you arched into Jaehyun with pleasure, sensing your eyes roll to the very back of your head and your toes curl into taut knots. 
You were still sensitive from your climax but Jaehyun’s pace was absolutely unforgiving, rutting into you mercilessly through your release. The tightness of your pussy drew a thick groan out of his mouth, but he still wasn’t done with you yet. And you were very keen on letting him use your body until he finished. 
Jaehyun relented when you finally started to calm down after coming undone, kissing your cheeks and the corner of your lips as you went almost entirely slack. The only motion in you was the aggressive heave of your chest as you panted for breath. 
You let Jaehyun thrust in and out of you, fighting the overstimulation for his sake. You were content to feel him brushing against your slick walls and hear those breathy grunts. 
Smoothing your hands up and down his burly arms, you whispered, “Jay, baby, keep going. I don’t care how long it takes. Fuck me until you’re done.”
Jaehyun bit his lip to veil a pathetic moan at those words. After he took care of your needs, you were letting him ply you for his own pleasure. You were his vice, his ruining. Your fingers grazed across his back, gathering the droplets of moisture that were beading at the surface. 
You could feel how hot his skin was, burning up in the heat of you. 
Abruptly, Jaehyun pulled out of you and tore you upright, holding his desperate cock in the palm of his hand as he groaned, “Get on your knees.” 
You obeyed without hesitation, meek. Crawling onto the carpet floor, you took him in your palms and stroked his thick girthy cock gingerly, careful not to be too rough. He was victimless in your warm hands, needy and at your mercy, leaving you with total control. 
Then it was game over for Jaehyun when you finally took him between your soft lips, gently easing him to the back of your throat. God, it was a struggle to fit his big cock completely into your mouth, but you somehow managed. You kept your cheeks hollowed, opening them for him to thrust. 
“Fuck,” Jaehyun moaned, head thrown back and eyes winced closed. You knew exactly what needed to be done to finish him off. 
You liked playing with his cock, obviously, but you loved having it in your mouth way more. There was nothing like driving Jaehyun to the cusp of insanity, teasing him with your tongue and hot mouth, plucking those beautiful sounds out of his lips. He lost himself whenever he was inside your throat. 
Jaehyun was in total bliss. Your mouth was no less impressive than your sheathlike cunt for all he knew, your lips wrapping around his stiff cock feverishly without a doubt in your mind that you could make him lose his own, and he almost didn’t want to orgasm yet. He only knew you, and what you did to him. And he was too greedy to want it to end. 
You had this boy all to yourself, wrapped tightly around your fingers with nowhere to hide. And you didn’t have the slightest clue what to do with him, or yourself. 
Aside from pleasuring each other in bed, or on the couch in this case. You were exceptionally gifted at getting him off.
Jaehyun could feel himself approaching the threshold of release and he did everything in his power to fight it off, to keep it at bay, but it was basically useless. He couldn’t even help but fuck your mouth. You were working him too good and he was coming whether he liked it or not. 
You were impressed that he had even lasted this long. Normally, when you let a guy hit it raw, they could barely resist emptying their load into you at the peak of climax. 
Jaehyun ultimately couldn’t control himself anymore and his jaw slacked with a deep, lethal groan as his hips came to a total standstill, painting the back of your throat with a streak of cum. Fuck, it was the sexiest noise you’d ever heard, and it aroused a throbbing between your legs. 
You managed to gulp him down and it was the hottest thing Jaehyun had ever seen watching you swallow his cum like that. He pulled back, a misty gleam in his dark soulless eyes as he collapsed onto the couch, breathless. There was a layer of dew at your lashes and you dabbed at your eyes to wipe them clear. 
Jaehyun looked like he’d just had the ground ripped from underneath him. “You just blew my mind,” he said through jagged breaths. 
You didn’t miss a beat. “I just blew you.”
Jaehyun laughed, shaking the hair out of his face. 
After both of you found your clothes and redressed yourselves, you decided to mention slyly, “By the way, I’m on birth control.”
Jaehyun’s mouth gaped open. “Are you serious? I was scared you might get pregnant.”
“That didn’t stop you from fucking me though, now did it?” you replied, crossing your arms. 
“I wasn’t that scared.”
You snickered. This idiot was a man you wanted to protect with your life, but you knew that you lacked the arsenal. “Besides, at least our baby would’ve had the world’s finest father.”
“And the world’s finest mother. They would’ve been beautiful,” Jaehyun flirted. 
Your cheeks flushed with heat at the compliment and his obvious flirtatious behavior. “I meant that you would’ve been a good dad, but sure. That works too.”
Jaehyun’s eyes flickered in shock. “Why do you think that?”
You shrugged, not thinking too hard about it. You didn’t need to when the answer was right at the tip of your tongue. “Because love itself is your passion. You’re selfless, patient. Protective. And you fight for what you love.”
Jaehyun said nothing. He was mulling over your confession, suspiciously quiet the whole time, but you were so tired that you hardly noticed. Your body was spent and you wanted to go upstairs and climb into his bed. 
You stretched your arms over your head and stood to collect the cocoa-stained dishes in your arms. Jaehyun blinked at the action, and would’ve stopped you to do it himself, but you were already halfway to the kitchen by the time he noticed. 
Jaehyun walked over and pressed himself behind you, draping his arms around your hips and resting his chin on your shoulder. You giggled, enamored with how it felt to be skin-to-skin with him, and when you finished with the two mugs, he reached over your head to set them down in the cabinets. 
You dragged Jaehyun upstairs by his arm to his own bedroom and slipped beneath his silk sheets, but invited him to drape himself above you and rest his head on your chest like you were his fluffy pillow and he was the thick, cozy blankets. 
It was comfortable that way. You liked Jaehyun’s weight on you, so close to you, crushed beneath the pressure. His arms would tangle around you and leave you little room to escape. But you wouldn’t want to leave. 
That was how you woke up sometimes. You used to be afraid that you’d accidentally rouse him and disturb his beauty slumber, but Jaehyun always slept like a ton of bricks. This boy could probably sleep through a hurricane and wake up wondering what happened to his roof. 
You sighed, whisking your fingers through his dark hair and staring at his face. You expected his eyes to be closed when you looked at him, but they were watching you. The ache in your chest was unignorable, unbearable. 
Those long nights and shorter mornings with Jaehyun were all you had, but you wanted something of permanence and you were finally admitting it to yourself. You knew these moments couldn’t last forever and didn’t attempt to deny it, but you were hoping and wishing. 
Smoothing your thumb down Jaehyun’s cheek, you felt a piece of your heart crumble. I can’t have you and I don’t even know why. 
“Jay?” you whispered. 
“Hm?”
You hesitated, brimming with reluctance. A few months ago, you would’ve thought it wasn’t your place to ask, but dammit Johnny was your brother and Jaehyun… meant something to you. This was officially your business. “Why does my brother hate you?” you asked. 
Jaehyun sat up abruptly, surprised. You matched the shock in his eyes, startled by his sudden movements. “You don’t know?”
You shook your head. “No. Johnny never told me. I assumed he would when he was ready, but it’s killing me and I need to know.” Because I can’t make sense of why we can’t be together, but ironically, it makes it easier to justify being here with you right now.
Jaehyun ran his fingers through his hair, looking particularly perturbed. No wonder it was so easy for you to climb into bed with him. Night after night, weekend after weekend. 
You were almost afraid to ask, “Is this going to change my perspective on you?”
“It shouldn’t if you believe me,” Jaehyun said, but the truth was that he wasn’t too confident that you’d take his side. 
You peered up at him expectantly, resting your hand on his back while he sat beside you. You were partly terrified to know the truth, watching him nervously, but god, you were exhausted of being kept in the dark. 
Jaehyun exhaled deeply. He didn’t want to lose you, not before he truly had you, but he knew what he was, and more importantly, he knew what he wasn’t. “You knew Mike, right?”
You bobbed your head, lips parting in surprise at the mention of Johnny’s friend, but let him continue. 
Jaehyun explained, “I’m sure you know, but he was addicted to drugs and it was fucking up his whole life. I tried to help him get clean before he fucked around and killed himself. And he was, I think. That’s what he said.”
You recognized this story. Johnny had said something similar, but it was about his own efforts. You somehow never realized that Jaehyun and Mike were friends. “But?”
“But then he wasn’t clean anymore,” Jaehyun said in the tiniest voice ever. “Last year, at one of Xiaojun’s parties. It came out of nowhere. He overdosed on fent and coke.”
You knew that too. And you hated that Mike was gone so soon, taken by a poison he couldn’t stop once he’d gotten his hands on it. It was heartbreaking. 
“Then some people started to say that I did it, that I gave him the drugs. And I was at the party only a room away when he OD’d, but I swear to god it wasn’t me. But they ran with it anyway.”
You frowned, pausing your hands’ consolations at his back in shock. It was starting to add up now, why Johnny hated Jaehyun. Because he thought he was complicit in the death of one of his closest friends. 
That was when he started to become a tad too overprotective of you and it didn’t take a genius to piece together why, but you never knew it was the reason he loathed Jaehyun and didn’t want you anywhere near him. There were so many nights where you went to parties at Jaehyun’s house and Johnny would ask if you’d done any drugs. 
Because of Jaehyun. 
“God, to this day, I want to punch the bastard that gave Mike that stuff. And if I knew who he was, I’d kick his ass. So, I can understand why Johnny wants to kick mine. But it wasn’t me,” Jaehyun said, sounding broken. 
You blinked, taking it all in silently. You were at a crossroads. 
Though he was hesitant, Jaehyun glanced into your eyes, unsure of what your silence meant. It was killing him. “Please tell me you believe me.”
“I believe you,” you said, because you did. You had no reason to doubt Jaehyun. Plus you hadn’t known him to press his luck with anything other than weed in the time that you’d known each other. 
“Thank god,” Jaehyun sighed in relief. “Does this change things between us?”
You shook your head. “No. I thought you were a good guy before and I still think you’re a good guy now. Nothing is new.”
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
Jaehyun rested his head on your shoulder and mumbled with obvious melancholy, “Trusting me.”
You laced your fingers through Jaehyun’s, squeezing his hand. “I’ll always trust you.”
That warmed Jaehyun’s heart and he sat there wondering what he had done to deserve you. It felt like there was a burden lifted from his shoulders. 
The day went on, bleeding into night. You expected Jaehyun to want to go somewhere to celebrate his birthday, but he reassured you that he was more than content to spend it indoors with you.
Still, it made you a little sad and you tried your best to cloak your gloomy emotions with your affections. You didn’t want Jaehyun to know, but you were thinking about how nice it would’ve been to do something as simple as go out together. 
Reasonably, you were shocked when Jaehyun said, “I want to try out this Japanese restaurant with you next weekend.”
You blinked. “You want to go out… with me?” you asked, making sure you weren’t mistaken. 
Jaehyun nodded, enthusiastic. “Is that a bad idea?”
“What if we get caught together?”
Jaehyun shrugged. “That’s a risk I’m willing to take.”
“Of course it is. You don’t have anything to lose,” you said, but your tone was humorous.
Jaehyun replied without hesitation, “I have you to lose.”
You were sold. Those five words were all you needed to hear.
There was a ginormous beaming smile on your face when you both finally decided to call it a night and you fell asleep with a certain soreness in your cheeks. 
Jaehyun stayed up a little later than you had. Not on purpose, but it was impossible to rest his eyes when he was distracted by your sleep patterns. Your soft snores and the way your hand curled over his stomach. 
It was the sheer opposite of annoying. It was intoxicating. 
He was the one clinging to you when you roused from bed after sunrise. You felt bad for slipping away like a thief in the night, but in your defense, it was daytime and you had to be in your professor’s classroom for attendance. 
After washing up and tossing on a spare outfit you had in Jaehyun’s room for events like these, you scribbled an apologetic note that he would surely find on his nightstand and quietly crept downstairs with a sadness weighing on you now that you had to leave. 
And surely enough, Jaehyun woke up to the note and smiled like a dumbass when he rubbed his eyes and read it to himself. 
Good morning, sleeping handsome. I’m gonna miss you today, but I have an early afternoon class that I have to pass to graduate. You sleep like deadweight, by the way. I had to fight out of your arms and you didn’t notice. See you next weekend. Call me. 
Jaehyun crawled out of bed and headed to the bathroom for a shower, but he could tell that you’d obviously already taken one with a single simple glance, and he was wishing you had invited him to join you. 
Now he sounded like a guy. Which was fair, because he was one. 
You raced home after class ended. Though you had more than enough exams that it would’ve been a good idea to study for, the main thing on your mind was plugging in the flash drive Jaehyun had gifted you, because you still were dying to know what was on it. 
It was safe to say that a song was the last thing you were expecting. 
You froze on your bed, unsure of how to feel. Everything hit you hard. The wistful yet romantic lyrics, the softness of his voice. Jaehyun was pouring his heart out to you, opening up to you about his feelings the best way he knew how. 
There was a ripple of emotions bursting through you. The lyrics were a little too sentimental for you to attempt to convince yourself that this wasn’t Jaehyun’s idea of a love confession. Maybe you’d known all along, but you didn’t want to accept it, because you knew that it wasn’t written in the stars. 
Now you had no choice. 
You sat there and cried. God, it was a beautiful song and that only made the tears drip even harder. You were bemused and overwhelmed. Bemused that he had obviously taken a lot of time out of his busy life to sit there and record a song for you, and overwhelmed by everything else. 
Jaehyun loves me. Jaehyun really loves me, you thought, admitting it to yourself. And it scared you to death, because you loved him too. 
Then the day came for you to hang out at the restaurant. It was the first time you and Jaehyun actually spent time together outside of his house. The meetup on the bridge and the incident at Jeno’s house didn’t count. Those were merely instances you’d happened to cross paths. 
When Jaehyun came up behind you in a back hug while you were waiting for him (you were embarrassingly early), you didn’t jolt or startle, relaxing into his touch without sparing him a glance first. Nobody else would be wearing his sexy ass cologne. 
You didn’t mention the song or acknowledge the obvious romantic tension between you at all, much to Jaehyun’s disappointment. But he knew you definitely took the flash drive back home. It wasn’t on the coffee table when he went downstairs, meaning you had grabbed it on your way out.   
He couldn’t help but wonder if you had listened to it and vividly pictured your reaction, but Jaehyun knew it would be pointless obsessing over the thought if he wasn’t going to ask. 
The truth was that you were conflicted. Your heart wanted Jaehyun, but you were rational and knew it was ridiculous. There was no point in setting yourselves up for more useless heartbreak. 
But you had fun with Jaehyun in that restaurant. You didn’t want to admit it, but it was the closest thing to a date you would ever have with him. You talked and held hands underneath the table like the pair of lovers you hoped you were in another life. 
Your insatiable lovesick heart was aching for more. And the worst part was that Jaehyun was oftentimes right there in your arms but had never felt further. 
It wasn’t until you were unfortunately back home and walking through the front door that you read aloud the text you’d received from Johnny. We need to talk. I’ll be home in an hour. “Well, that cannot be good,” you mumbled to yourself. 
“It isn’t.”
You jolted in alarm. You didn’t know Johnny was home, though it had most definitely been well over an hour. Jaehyun was too interesting for you to even think about touching your phone once. 
Given the familiar less than content glare on Johnny’s face, you fought a groan, wondering what you could’ve possibly done now when you’d been on your best behavior lately. You lilted in the usual tone you used when you wanted to get out of trouble, “Hi, my handsome big brother that I love dearly.”
Johnny, obviously not in the mood, snapped, “Taeyong saw you with Jaehyun today. You wanna explain that to me?”
That was the last thing you expected him to say and the shock was plain on your face. “What?”
Johnny shook his head, unsurprised that you were acting clueless, and though he was furious he tried not to raise his voice. “Don’t play dumb. Are you dating him - fucking him?”
“I’m not dating him, we’re just…,” you trailed in frustration, realizing that you’d been caught. “Shit, yeah. I’ve fucked him and we’re hanging out.”
Johnny blew out a long, exasperated sigh. “I can’t believe this. God, my own sister.”
Tears threatened. At this point, you were desperate. Your whole world was crashing down without warning. You wished you would’ve at least seen the text and braced yourself. “Johnny, please. If you gave him a chance, I think you two would really like each other!”
“I could never like him,” Johnny replied viciously, face tensing in fury as if the suggestion was an affront to his entire existence.  
You approached Johnny, somehow mustering the courage to come near him. “Please listen to me, alright? He didn’t do it, Johnny. It wasn’t him!”
Johnny gawked. He couldn’t believe you were defending Jaehyun and took a gigantic step back, wanting to be nowhere near you. He hissed, “Of course that’s what the bastard told you. Did he give you proof?”
Frantic, you shook your head, and it came to you that you only had trust to back Jaehyun’s claims. “No, but...”
Johnny grabbed his keys and interjected, “Stop. Just stop. I don’t even want to see your face right now.”
Your lips were agape when Johnny stormed towards the garage, full of purebred rage and disappointment. 
After a few minutes, the shock started to dull away and you temporarily regained the ability to function, racing upstairs to your bedroom to be inert. You hated the brutal sting splitting you in half. While your thoughts were on pause and you were consumed by emptiness, it was the one thing keeping you from dissociating. 
Sitting there on your bed, knees pressed to your chest and your arms curled around yourself, you couldn’t even cry. It would come, but right now you were trying to process the pain. And in the meantime, you realized what needed to be done.
Two long days later, you were meeting Jaehyun at the bridge one final time. It took nearly forty-eight hours of gathering the courage to pick up your phone, but you had to let him know it was over. That this was goodbye. 
You ran your fingers across the wooden overlook, taking in nature, but even the peaceful noise of your surroundings failed to soothe your heartbreak. 
The sound of tentative footsteps barely drew you from your own head, and you didn’t want to face your visitor. You knew it was Jaehyun. For more reasons than one. 
Though you couldn’t see, Jaehyun had his hands in his pockets. “Am I late?”
“No, you’re perfectly on time. I got here early. I needed time to think,” you replied with a fleeting glance at your watch. 
Jaehyun watched you with unease, a perturbed thud in his heart making it challenging to breathe. This was bad, he knew, and for whatever reason, that fear that he was doomed was unshakable. “What happened?”
“Johnny knows,” you began, finally whipping around. It was the least you could do, knowing you had to break his heart. “Taeyong saw us together. He snitched. Now Johnny wants nothing to do with me.”
Jaehyun’s heart sank. No wonder you hadn’t texted or called him in two days. Aside from inviting him here, that is. “What now?”
“I can’t see you anymore. Johnny already hates me now. If I keep seeing you behind his back, I won’t have a brother anymore. I can’t live with that guilt. That’s why I’ve been running from it for months,” you said quietly. 
Jaehyun stiffened, like a boulder. “We’re giving up? That’s insane! Don’t let him stop us from being together.”
You recoiled, surprised. “Are you asking me to choose you over my brother?”
“No, of course not,” Jaehyun sighed, combing his hands through his hands as he searched for the right words. 
You desperately wanted to reach out to him, to touch him, but you couldn’t bring yourself to move. “You should be with someone who can treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Someone you can hold and kiss outside without any worries. I can’t give you that, Jaehyun.”
Jaehyun shook his head. “None of that matters to me. I want to be with you. I don’t care what compromises I have to make.”
“Well, I do,” you whispered sullenly, reminding yourself of everything you had to lose. “It was never going to work. You had to know this. We aren’t Shakespeare characters. Hell, even they don’t get to be happy!”
Jaehyun’s chest was taut with pain. It was usually him that had to tell people the brutal reality of unfortunate situations. And this was how it felt to be on the other side?
Fighting the oncoming threat of tears, you continued, “I’ve enjoyed these past months with you and we’ve made special, unforgettable memories together. But enough is enough. We were gonna have to face the truth one day, and that day is today. It was inevitable. I hope that somehow we can still be friends.”
Jaehyun spat, “I don’t want to be just friends. I can’t be just friends with you. Why don’t you understand that?”
Oh, you did. You really, really did. This was hurting you in ways unimaginable and nothing could’ve prepared you for the moment where you had to set Jaehyun free. 
Not even knowing this day would come. 
“I love you,” Jaehyun confessed for the first time, taking some steps closer to you. The gleam in his eyes killed you. 
Those words were like ice in your veins. Your heart stopped beating. For half a minute, the whole world ceased. You shook your head, sensing a vicious pain returning to you. “You can’t love me.”
Jaehyun switched on a dime and hissed, “You can’t tell me how to feel.”
Denial still crept through your blood. Apparently, it was one of your many talents. Jaehyun’s too. “You’re in love with the idea of me. You just want somebody to love again and maybe I made you realize that, but you don’t love me.”
Jaehyun was trembling. You were trying to diagnose him and he wouldn’t stand for it. “Saying that doesn’t make it true.”
You were defiant. You needed it to be true. There had to be some way to get him to let you go and move on. You didn’t want to resort to cruel methods, but you would if you were rendered optionless. 
Jaehyun continued, “You did make me realize that I wanted love again. But I also realized that I could have it all in you.”
Finally pushed past your limits, you shattered and screamed, “Goddammit, Jaehyun - you can’t have me!”
You turned away, hoping he would let you leave. You didn’t want things to end on even worse terms than they already were. 
But you should’ve known Jaehyun would be relentless. He was a fighter. You were what he wanted, what he loved, and he’d damned if he surrendered without a fight. “So, that’s it? You’re just going to walk away?” 
You rooted in place and exhaled loudly, bristling with frustration. “The fuck do you want me to do, Jay? It’s out of my hands.”
“Talk to Johnny - you know that I didn’t do anything!”
“No, I don’t know anything,” you grumbled, crossing your arms tightly. 
That stunned Jaehyun. You didn’t trust him anymore?
Jaehyun laughed, but it was humorless. Needless to say, he was pissed. “Wow. You gave up the fight before it started, before it was over. You never gave us a chance.”
You walked away. You didn’t have the strength. 
Jaehyun kept prodding. You were unbelievable and he couldn’t stand you right now. “I bet this isn’t just about Johnny. I bet him being your brother is just a cop-out so that you don’t have to trust another guy again.”
Now that stung deep. He was hitting you where it hurt, making sure you understood how badly you had wounded him, and you realized there was a chance he was right and you hadn’t even considered it. You whipped around, snapping, “Fuck you. I wish I never met you.”
Jaehyun watched you disappear behind the thick branches, simmering where he stood. God, he resented the fuck out of you right now. You were accepting defeat, throwing in the towel, and he hated you because of it. 
The seemingly endless months of ignorant bliss were washed down the drain all because you didn’t want to be a little more optimistic. You could’ve had it all together, had you not resigned yourself to being unhappy. You were so hell-bent on being realistic that you closed the door on other possibilities. 
Almost the second you burst through the front door, your tears fell after what felt like an eternity of fighting them back. Johnny and your parents turned to face you with alarm when you paraded through the living room, but you ignored your mother’s questions and made a beeline for your bed. 
Johnny didn’t ask. He already knew, and he was only somewhat satisfied that you had done what should’ve never needed to happen in the first place. 
The days of the week started to bleed into each other. You didn’t talk to Jaehyun for obvious reasons. Johnny, the man whose shoulders you thought would always be there for you to lean on, was ironically giving you the cold shoulder. And  Mark wouldn’t understand even if you explained, though you knew he was available. 
Never had you felt so alone. You had no one to escape to. No one who could comprehend or justify the moral dilemma you forced yourself into. I’ve truly outdone myself. I’ve betrayed my brother, baffled my best friend, and lost my lover back to back. That has to be a world record. 
Seven days marked the longest time you had gone without speaking with Jaehyun since the onset of this private love affair. He didn’t call or text you either, which was understandable. Plus it was what you wanted, or at least that was what you used to think. 
You weren’t sure anymore. Cutting him off was the whole purpose of meeting him, but why did it make you feel so isolated?
It wasn’t that long ago that you did it because you thought it was the right choice, or maybe because you thought it would make things better. But it hadn’t. Now that you had effectively shielded yourself from the universe, you were less free and more lonely. 
And time continued to fly by, days of leaving the house only to attend class and coming back to your room only to collapse into sorrow. 
Johnny felt bad. At night, there were a couple of times where he hovered near your door and heard you sobbing, but he was too petty and spiteful to knock or check up on you. You had stung him too. 
The difference was that when Mike died, you did everything in your power to console Johnny. You gave him the space he needed, of course, but you opened the door for him to talk to you if he wanted and lent him a shoulder to cry on. You bought all his favorite snacks and encouraged him to go outside, even if it was just the backyard. 
Now, you were suffering your own loss, one of many but in a different manner. It wasn’t like you were a bereaved wife, but the agony wasn’t any less excruciating. 
Mark came over whenever he had the extra time to spare every week to check up on you, reminding you that you weren’t as alone as you thought you were, but you still didn’t want to confide in him about your emotions. You were afraid he would unintentionally make you feel more stupid. 
You were a little verklempt. Maybe more than. They said time was the healer of all wounds, but with every week spent without Jaehyun’s familiar musk in the air and dreamy voice in your ear, you felt less and less whole.   
What could you have done to keep him close to you, even if it was just for a little while longer? Maybe if you hadn’t ended on such cold, distant terms, moving on would be easier and you would be happier. You could’ve contentedly looked back on the memories of your last time together knowing you had done everything in your control to make it better. 
But you were worried that that was false. You were worried that Jaehyun was right and this ending was premature. 
It doesn’t matter, premature or not. It was going to end either way. There’s no point in delaying the inevitable, you reassured yourself in what you once believed was aggressively honest consolation, but you were starting to question how you could be so certain. 
You told yourself that with the burden of your immoral secrets weighing you down, you and Jaehyun could’ve never been a pair. You knew it wouldn’t last forever. You’d always known. You didn’t expect things to make it this far, but dammit you didn’t expect to have your fun cut short so soon either. 
It wasn’t fair. 
Sometimes you dreamt of what it would be like to hold Jaehyun in your arms without worries, without stolen touches and kisses when nobody was paying attention. 
You sat in the nook at your window, curled up into yourself, thinking only about Jaehyun. If it wasn’t for the stupid secret that unraveled far too damn quickly, maybe none of this would’ve ever happened. Maybe I would have you, with nothing to lose. Nothing to fear.
Fuck, you should’ve been happy. Given how unlucky in love you were, you doubted that you were intended to ever be happy. You hadn’t smiled in an eternity. But Jaehyun made you feel your peak of happiness, as if you had never been more euphoric with anybody else. 
More than once, you had been in love, but never like how you were in love with Jaehyun. Why did things have to become so complicated for the both of us? Why did reality hit like a fucking freight train?
If only you never fell for Jaehyun, never even gave him the time of day, then you wouldn’t be hurting. Your heart was being tortured. 
It took another day of stumbling into the kitchen with dark eye bags after yet another sleepless night of sobbing into your pillows, and Johnny ignoring your existence altogether while he poured himself a mug of coffee, but it finally occurred to you that you couldn’t relive this agonizing cycle over and over. 
You were sick of the pain and the dread. The insufferably cold distance when his bedroom was right down the hall from yours. You were sick of sniveling until you had no more tears left to weep, until you felt totally empty. 
Something had to give. 
To your surprise, and luck, Mark called you a few minutes after you strolled back into your room wordlessly, devising a plan you loathed yourself for not thinking of earlier. “Hey, bestie. Talk to me,” he said. “How you feeling?”
“Like judgment day came early for me, I guess,” you mumbled into the phone, collapsing onto your sheets. 
Mark sighed roughly. “Damn. I was hoping you would feel a little better this week. Johnny said you’re the world’s biggest hermit and it’s kinda depressing.”
That shocked you to your core, but you tried to play it off. “Oh, Johnny’s been talking about me?”
“Well, yeah. I’ve obviously been checking up on the both of you on the regular, and neither of you really wanna open up to me, but Johnny has less of an issue talking about you. Man, he still cares. He’s your brother.”
Your heart was sore. You wished he would tell you that himself. In your own home, to your own brother, you felt like a stranger. 
Tears burned your eyes, but you fought them and lilted playfully, “Oh, my beloved bestie…”
Mark knew that tone and interjected, “Fuck.”
You fought a tiny laugh and continued, “Would you mind doing your best friend a teeny tiny little favor?”
The suggestion alone sounded like bad news and Mark was questioning what he was about to get himself into, because no matter what came out his mouth first, you were his best friend. Of course, he was going to tell you “yes.”
Mark huffed, “Jesus. Ease up on the mischief. Johnny still wants to beat my ass too, you know? He asked me if I knew you were boning Jaehyun and of course I couldn’t lie. I’m a man of God.”
Because you didn’t feel like disputing that statement, you ignored his speech entirely and asked knowingly, “Your dad’s a cop, isn’t he?”
“I don’t like where this is going.”
Your voice was maybe a little hopeful. “Is there a way that he can look into the investigation of Mike’s overdose?”
Mark knew exactly why you were asking and even he was ashamed he hadn’t thought of the little plan. There was a brief pause before he said, “I’ll call you back.” And then he hung up. 
You were a little tense sitting there on your bed waiting around for a phone call. Not because you were worried about Mark not doing it, which would be ridiculous because you both wanted what was best for Johnny. It was because you were scared of not having a solution.
Deciding it would be useless to sit around antsily, you took a well-deserved nap after a restless twenty-four hours of no sleep. It would only do you good. Even if Mark didn’t have the answers you wanted, your grades would thank you.
Sleep came easy. Though they weren’t Jaehyun’s, it was nice and peaceful bunched beneath your blankets. You flipped your pillow over to the side that wasn’t stained with tears and let darkness take the wheel. 
Johnny peeked inside your room after an hour or two, wanting to talk to you, but when he saw you comfortably snoozing in your bed and obliviously clinging onto a spare pillow for dear life, he backed away and shut the door. He knew you needed the rest. 
You jolted awake when your phone started to ring vehemently beside your head, cursing yourself for not turning on Do Not Disturb before immediately remembering why you didn’t, and quickly lifting the phone to answer gruffly, “Hello?”
“Good news,” Mark started, sounding suspiciously chipper. “I had my dad pull some strings. And you’re gonna wanna hear this.”
Sitting up, you exclaimed in an impatient whisper, “Well?”
“Jeong Jaehyun is not a suspect, for one. There were witnesses that confirmed him giving Mike his fix was impossible. But for two, the case reopened a few months ago and they’re literally about to bust the guy that did it. They’re waiting on a warrant. You’ve got great timing,” Mark said. 
You rubbed your eyes in disbelief. “What the hell?”
“Isn’t this good news?”
“Yeah, it is,” you whispered, too shocked to know how to feel. You didn’t think the stupid plan would really work. “Thank you, Mark.”
Mark was quick to reassure you, “You don’t need to thank me. You’re my best friend and Johnny is like my brother-in-law in some weird way. See, that sounds weird. Anyways, when do you plan on telling him?”
You laughed at his rambling, but hummed when you thought about his question. “Uh, would today be a bad time?”
“The sooner the better.”
You sighed in relief. Then, you donned the loveliest tone you could muster, and asked sweetly, “Will you come with me please? I think your presence will really help.”
Mark retorted, “Should I bring the entire police force too?”
You rolled your eyes and begged, “Come on, Mark. You’re my bestie and I need you. He’s more mad with me than he is with you and plus you have the benefit of a credible father.”
“I was already on my way,” Mark chirped, jiggling his keys loudly before hanging up. 
You giggled. What would you do without that boy? He was your ride or die. 
Fifteen minutes later, Mark was pulling into your driveway and hopping out of the car. You let him in, locking the door behind your best friend and embracing him in the biggest hug of his life. You needed the comfort to wean off your nerves. 
The last thing you expected was for Johnny to come trudging down the stairs within the very next minute. 
You released Mark, turning to your brother, and you and Johnny said in unison, “Hey, I really need to talk to you.”
Johnny blinked in surprise. It almost seemed like he was mirroring you. Mark snickered to himself, mumbling something about you two obviously being related, but Johnny was chill and said, “You can go first.”
You heaved a breath. It was a shock that Johnny deliberately chose to speak to you for the first time, presumably without the intervening influence of your parents’ rebuttal on your behalf. “I don’t know how to say this, but first I wanted to tell you that I’m really sorry for sneaking around with Jaehyun behind your back. It was a really shitty thing for me to do.”
Johnny nodded along, listening. 
“But I fell in love with him,” you said without hesitation. “And I’m not going to ask you to accept us or anything. That’s your choice. But I thought there was something you should know that’s bigger than Jaehyun and I.”
Johnny looked tense, but he encouraged you to go on. “Okay.”
It felt like the whole world was watching you with Johnny’s eyes carefully set on your face, but you didn’t let it stop you from continuing, “It really wasn’t him that gave Mike his supply, and yes we have proof. Mark’s dad not only confirmed it wasn’t him, but they’re working on getting him into custody.”
Mark nodded, standing right behind you. Like he was vouching for you the same way you’d vouched for him all these years. “It’s true, Johnny. It wasn’t Jaehyun. It was some random shady dealer that preys on addicts at these parties. He has a track record.”
Johnny’s eyes flickered. “It really wasn’t Jaehyun?”
Mark shook his head. “He’s innocent, dude.”
Johnny fell silent for a long time. You could see him stiffening, penitent. “I don’t know what to say,” he whispered. “I feel like shit now.”
You snorted. “Don’t do that to yourself. Please. I’ve felt like shit enough these past few weeks for the both of us.”
“About that,” Johnny began, getting whiplash. The look on his face was gentle, remorseful, and he hated himself for being anything else to his sister. To the last person that deserved his misplaced frustration. “I wanted to tell you that I’m sorry for freezing you out.”
“Johnny…,” you trailed. 
Johnny shook his head. He needed you to let him say this. “I know you’ve had a rough few weeks, and though I haven’t exactly been pleased with you, you’re still my sister. The least I could’ve done was ask you ‘how are you doing?’ but I couldn’t even be bothered.”
You sighed loudly. That was true. And you’d be lying if you said it didn’t rub salt in the wounds. 
“I haven’t done a good job at showing it, but I care for you. You’re my only sibling and let’s be honest, I don’t think I’ll be getting another one,” Johnny said lightheartedly. 
You snickered. Damn right. You knew your parents would vehemently agree if they were here. They couldn’t be happier that all of their kids were adults. Well, maybe if you moved out. 
Johnny breathed in some air. A lot of mistakes had obviously been made on both parts and he was ready to put it all behind him. “I guess what I’m trying to say is that I forgot to do what was more important. Be your brother. And I’ll apologize for the rest of my life until you forgive me.”
“No need. I forgive you right now,” you whispered, simpering. 
Johnny stood there like a dumbass, hesitant. He didn’t feel like he deserved your forgiveness and would be spending the next weeks repairing his relationship with you, doing whatever it took. 
You took the lead, starting reluctantly, “Listen. I know Mike’s passing has been hard on you, Johnny. That’s why you want to protect me and everything else you love in your life, but I’m an adult. You need to let me take care of me.” 
A cloud of melancholy hung over Johnny and it wouldn’t leave. The grief was still fresh, as if Mike had died yesterday. 
You stepped forward, placing a hand on Johnny’s shoulder. “And you’re my big brother. I’ll obviously still give you a call when I’m going through a rough time. But you have to respect that I’m my own person.”
Johnny nodded. “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry about all that too. I’ll be better.”
“I will too,” you said, because the truth was that it was time the two of you started making efforts. 
Johnny grabbed you in his arms and pulled you into a gigantic bear hug. You wrapped your arms around him, pulling him close, and breathed easier in relief as weeks worth of wounds vanished. 
Wincing your eyes closed, you let yourself be content in your brother’s loving embrace for the first time in a while. You needed this. 
You could barely feel yourself breathe when Johnny started to hug you so tightly you thought he might accidentally squeeze the life out of you. “Alright, chill, Johnny. I think I might die,” you wheezed.
Johnny released you with a chuckle. You gasped for breath, shaking your head. Though the bone-crushing hug was appreciated nonetheless. 
Mark was content to be in the background and cheered in awe, “I’m so proud of you guys. You overcame your differences and reunited like real siblings. I knew it would happen eventually, but dude, this is refreshing to see.”
You nodded in agreement. One less broken relationship. But you had another one to salvage before it was too late. 
Then, Mark remembered Johnny was none too thrilled that he was complicit in you getting away with your sneaky little secret and asked, “Yo, Johnny, are we good?”
“No.”
Mark gawked. 
“I’m kidding,” Johnny said with a teasing lilt. “We’re good, man.”
Mark exhaled in relief. “Thank god.”
You smiled to yourself. You were happy, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing from your life. 
Johnny clamped a hand onto your shoulder and said, “Go get him.”
You gasped, but you didn’t question how he knew. He just did. It was a sibling thing. “You mean it?”
“Yes. You said it yourself. You love him, and I have no reason to come between that anymore. You deserve to be happy after dating asshole after asshole,” Johnny told you (sort of) kindly. 
You snickered, and grabbed your keys from your pockets. “Pray for me. He’s not gonna be thrilled.”
Johnny shook his head, disagreeing. “Yeah, he will. Tell him that I’m very sorry, but the threat to kick his ass still stands if he fucks with you.”
“I’ll be sure to let him know,” you deadpanned, heading for the door. 
The drive to Jaehyun’s house was inexplicably anxious. You could still think, but every thought went by at the speed of a thousand miles per second. And it didn’t help that you were overthinking the entire situation, dreading the endless amount of “what ifs.”
For fuck’s sake, you didn’t even know if he would be there. You were showing up unannounced, uninvited. What if he had already found another woman to keep him company in your forgettable absence?
Then, you were at his front doorstep. And you had no time to vividly imagine every possible scenario, because Jungkook answered your knocks and you could only barely see inside. 
You politely greeted him in a small voice and asked, “Can I come inside?”
Jungkook’s eyes narrowed and he didn’t waste any time in snapping, “Why should I let you in after you broke my friend’s heart?”
“Because I’m sorry and I want to set things right with him,” you said, matching his lack of hesitation. 
Yugyeom hurried over and took the lead, widening the door for you to enter and whining dramatically, “Oh, god. Please come in. Fix him. Do your womanly magic and bring him back to life. I’m sick of his brooding ass.”
You wanted to laugh, but you hated the thought of causing Jaehyun all this suffering. If it was anything like the kind you’d been through lately, you knew he was in a tough spot. 
Thanking Yugyeom, you made a beeline for the stairs, rushing up them like Jaehyun would somehow know it was you approaching them and slip away before you could get the chance to apologize. 
You knocked on Jaehyun’s door, but you guessed he really wasn’t expecting you to come over, because he shouted exasperatedly, “Jesus, Yugyeom. Fuck off.”
“It’s not Yugyeom,” you called back. “It’s me.”
All you could hear was silence. Then there was a shuffle, and a few moments later the door clicked unlocked and Jaehyun was standing before you in all his glory. “What are you doing here?”
“I walked to talk,” you replied timidly, struggling to maintain eye contact. 
Irritated, Jaehyun huffed, “We already had a conversation.” Though the truth was that he was glad you were here, standing in front of him again. He was borderline miserable without you in his life. 
The reminder of your final exchange with Jaehyun made you wince in shame. “I know, but I wanted to apologize. Won’t you at least hear me out?”
Jaehyun turned to return to his bed, reminding sharply, “You’re the one that walked away. I was willing to at least try to make us work, but you didn’t even want to do that.”
“Because I thought it would be useless,” you admitted, giving chase and shutting the door behind yourself. “But I don’t anymore. You were right. I should’ve fought for us and I regret not doing it earlier.”
Jaehyun might’ve acted like he wasn’t listening, being totally dismissive, but he definitely noticed your specific use of language. “You said ‘earlier.’ What do you mean?”
You had a beaming smile on your face as you admitted, “I mean, I talked to Johnny about us. I managed to get him to listen to me and proved your innocence. Thank god Mark’s father is a cop.”
Jaehyun softened. “You did all that? Why?”
“Because you’re worth fighting for,” you whispered tenderly, looking at Jaehyun like he was your entire universe. 
Jaehyun was so close to accepting that he would never have anyone look at him that way again. After a heartbreak, the feeling of being unlovable always loomed over his head and you were no different. But dammit if he wasn’t tired of the doubts. 
Tentatively, you came towards Jaehyun completely, sitting beside him on his mattress that you missed almost as much as you missed him. “I didn’t mean it, when I said I wish I never met you.”
Jaehyun almost laughed. That was the least hurtful thing to leave your lips. “I know. You were upset. And you had every right to be.”
You frowned, suspicious of how calm he was. You half expected him to lash out. “Stop being understanding.” 
“If you’re expecting me to be angry, I can’t do anything for you. I’ve already spent the past few weeks in that stage of grief.”
You blinked. It was as if he could read your mind. “Where are you at now?”
Jaehyun was totally indifferent when he told you, “Bargaining.”
“Funny. Me too,” you sighed. If only you had been more open-minded, you could have spared you and Jaehyun all this worthless misery. 
You noticed that Jaehyun said nothing, but he looked a little in his head. And he was somewhere up there, scolding himself for letting him be a fool for you, then thinking, I couldn’t resist loving you. Sue me. 
The emotion was finally surfacing on his face. You could see all of it now. The distress and the love and the heartache. You smirked, thinking to yourself, He’s my little damsel now. 
The grin on your lips was fleeting and it disappeared by the time you grabbed Jaehyun’s hands in yours and he peered down at you in surprise. “I’m sorry,” you told him softly. “I thought you were crazy and hopeless for thinking we could be together. Now, I see that you didn’t want to quit until you’d exhausted your resources. And I forced your hand. I’m sorry.”
Jaehyun squeezed your hand. “It’s okay. I understand where you were coming from. You were trying to make things as painless as possible because you genuinely thought we didn’t stand a chance against fate.”
“And somehow I made shit ten times more painful,” you murmured, ashamed. 
“Like I said, I understand where you were coming from,” Jaehyun said, being gentler than he should’ve. 
You shook your head. That meant nothing. “But do you forgive me?”
Jaehyun gazed into your pained eyes. It still broke him, but he was starting to lick the wound clean. Things were changing. “Yes. I forgive you, baby.”
Your heart softened at the pet name. You never expected to fall for Jaehyun. Not Jaehyun or his precious smile and adorable face. Not the little things he’d say that made you feel as if you would burst with love. 
But you did fall for him, and all those little things that made him himself. And you didn’t want to be without them ever again. 
“I’m tired of loving each other behind closed doors. I want to be seen with you. I want to go to museums and look at really abstract paintings that you’ll tell me are meaningful for whatever reason. I want to explore the city with you and visit shops I’d never think to go to otherwise.”
Jaehyun was sporting a beaming smile. “You said you love me.”
“I haven’t said it before?”
Jaehyun huffed, “No. Not even once.”
You held his face, cradling it just shy of yours, and confessed, “Then, I love you. I love you. I love you so much, Jaehyun. I don’t know what to do without you.”
“I love you too,” Jaehyun said, leaning in to mumble the tiny confession into your neck, and reminded of how desperately he craved the warmth of your skin. 
You were grinning so hard your cheeks were hurting. 
“Don’t leave me ever again. Don’t ever let me go. Never,” Jaehyun instructed you sharply, and although it was partly muffled, you heard him loud and clear.
“I won’t,” you told him, kissing his forehead. “If you play me that song you made me on your guitar.”
Jaehyun blinked up at you in surprise. “You liked it?”
“I think I’ve cried to it, like, a million times,” you admitted unabashedly. 
Jaehyun’s jaw went slack for only a split second, then he quickly recovered and leapt up to grab his guitar from its resting position in the corner of his room. 
A smile danced onto your lips as he held the guitar, strumming to the beautiful song he’d written with only his insurmountable adoration for you in mind, and the pining nature of the lyrics made you realize that the yearning was over. You were Jaehyun’s. And Jaehyun was yours. 
Losing Jaehyun, one of the few people you loved depthlessly, was like losing the last person you had. You didn’t know how to be without him. And you didn’t have to learn, because you never would be without him again. 
You watched him attentively, beaming from ear to ear, taking in his beautiful smile and soft voice, and familiar heady cologne. And you thought to yourself, There’s nothing to dislike about this guy. 
3K notes · View notes
kissitbttr · 7 months
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Miggy getting babied by his pregnant wife?
hiii! i hope you don’t mind, i changed it a bit because I don’t want it to look too much alike on the other one! this one’s short, enjoy! xx
-
being a mother to a 6 month old pregnancy bump isn’t easy. if it was, fathers could do it.
and that’s what miguel had been learning through it all. seeing your mood swings shift in a span of thirty seconds, constant cravings for ice creams, kebabs etc, snapping (directly at him and mostly at him), frequent backaches and fatigue. he’s very much impressed how an existence of a human being living inside of you could actually change you as a person.
still, doesn’t mean he loves you less.
“ugh, i’d give my left tit for a big plate of mofongos and a fat ass joint right now”
the two of you are cuddled up in the couch, watching some lame old american tv show that miguel seems to find enjoyable. you’re dressed in one of his t-shirt and grey sweatpants. ones that you had claimed as yours despite miguel’s protest.
your husband chuckles, pulling you closer by the shoulder. “lucky you, mami. i bought an extra before i came home just for you. i could heat it up for you later if you want.”
a dreamy sigh escape your lips, reaching out to kiss his cheek. “thanks papi. you’re the best. what about the joint?”
he snorts, head shaking as his eyes cast down to yours. “i don’t think weed is good for the baby.”
“says who?” you fake a gasp, pulling back slightly. “it’s literally herbal! unless it’s contaminated with tobacco. don’t we have a stash up in the closet?”
“you finished them all, ma. basically rolling those joints with your pretty fingers before this happened” he points at the bump. “usted es avaro, mi corazon. barely left some for me”
a smile pulls up into your mouth, head resting against his bare chest. hand interlocking with his. “remember when we were celebrating our one year anniversary and got high?”
“ay dios mio” he groans playfully, rolling his head back. “don’t remind me, baby”
“it was so fun” you ignore the embarrassment creeping into his cheeks, grinning even wider when he tries to hide it. “we went to taco bell after.”
“yeah and i threw it up because it tasted like shit”
you hum, nodding along. “and decided to get shawarmas and fries instead because we weren’t satisfied”
“one with the small food truck in 133th street” he confirms, his cheek against the crown of your hair. smiling at the memory. “i remember you told me not to get ones from across that italian place that you like because we need to support small business. had to stop you from crying too much because you kept saying how unfair it was for rich bastards to keep open up restaurants when they have shitty palate”
his comment makes you laugh hard. his grip around your hand tighten. some sort of pride blooms in his chest when he sees you laugh freely like that.
“oh god i remember!” as you slowly recover from the laugh. “we sat on the pavement after that right? you kept telling me how you want me to be the mother of your child.”
“damn, why do you keep recalling all the embarrassing things i did, huh?” he asks jokingly with a deep chuckle. now his attention isn’t even on the tv anymore.
“because it’s cute! you were so cute!” he shakes his head once more, biting down a shy smile as you shift your body weight to wrap your arms around his neck. “my miggy is so cute with the ‘i want you to be my wife, i want to get you pregnant, mi amor. say yes please, please, pleaseeeee’”
you continue to mock his actions back then, watching him cower down at the attempt of you trying to mimic his voice. strangely enough, you almost got it right.
he has his hands covered his face.“stop that, princesa! come onnnn”
you respond with a head shake as a ‘no’. “ay, papi don’t be shy” you giggle, trying to pry his hands off. “come on. let me see my hubby. let me see him”
miguel doesn’t budge for a while before peeking in-between his fingers like a little kid, then slowly peeling his hands away, jutting his lower lip forward.
you gasp, hand over your heart. “god damn! you can’t be walking around looking like that! can’t have all the girls falling for the sexiest man alive”
he rolls his eyes, smiling at your compliment. “stop being biased, baby!”
“i am not! how dare you calling the mother of your kid a liar, hm?” you tug him down, letting his head rest in between your neck and shoulder blade. “my baby daddy is sooo handsome. i won the fucking lottery.”
“definitely the other way around, love.” he disagrees, hand coming up to rest on your bump. “you stole my heart the moment you walked into my office that day. never thought in my life that a gorgeous architect made me get down on my knees and pray to the lord up there to let me have you.”
now that makes your heart skips a beat. how could you compete with that? he never fails to make you swoon even after years of being with him. it’s like the butterflies never stopped.
“hmm now you’re being biased, miggy”
“nope. i was so sure that i was in love with you.” he then turns to look up to you, tone becoming serious. “my god, you were the finest thing i have ever laid my eyes upon, mami. was literally bending over backwards to impress you. and now? seeing you swollen with my baby just made you ten times more gorgeous than before. you’re the love of my life, mi amor. and i will prove it to you for the rest of my life if i had to”
truly, you had never believe in luck or hope. it’s something that never sits well with you. odds never had been in your favor and you believed that for the longest time. you were fine being all alone. you have a job that pays you well, great condo, a body that you learned to adore, a loving mother. four things that you have always been so grateful for. you wouldn’t change a single thing.
but when miguel happened? everything in your life had changed for much better. from having to do everything on your own to ‘i got this one baby’. sure, you weren’t exactly comfortable with it at first, because you had never been the one who had asked for help.
yet you learned to love it all because of him,
with a grateful smile, you trace your fingertips across his soft lips. beautiful red eyes not leaving yours, as if he’s afraid that if he looks away for a second he would lose you completely,
“you’re the love of my life too, miguel”
-
don’t forget to reblog and comment babes!! xx
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ariisheresstuff · 9 months
Text
The Hormones
Pairings: Carmy x Pregnant!Reader
Summary: You decided to go with Carmy to work, Carmy hesitated with bringing you along with you. You been dealing with pregnancy hormones recently. With the hormones hitting you, Richie had enough and lashes out on you making you upset.
Genre: Angst to comfort
Warnings: Cursing, Crying, mentions of being pregnant, Richie being mean, Yelling.
MasterList
A/N: My requests are open! 💜
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“Alright baby, I’m off to work.” Carmen announces as walks over to you in the kitchen. He places a hand on your bump rubbing it gently before kissing your forehead.
“Actually, Carmy?” You said making him go back to face you.
“What’s wrong baby?” He asked as he softly cupped your face worriedly. You smiled at him being so protective of you.
“Can I come with you today? I’m tired of being home by myself.” You said with pleading eyes.
Carmen sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. “Are you sure babe? I don’t want you getting tired of being bored at the place. Plus, you should be resting.” Carmen loves when you come along with him to work, but with your hormones being more stronger and you being more sensitive, he hesitated. You literally started to cry over tying your shoe because your stomach was in the way.
You pouted, “Please Carmy? I promise I won’t cause trouble I just wanna be with you, I get sad when I’m alone here.” Your eyes were already watering making Carmen panic.
“Okay, okay baby, don’t get upset. I hate when you get upset, it hurts me. Of course you can come, but if things to start to overwhelm you, you tell me okay?” You nodded making him smile and peck your lips. He grabbed your hand as the two you of walked out of the apartment.
“Look who finally showed up!” Richie announced as Carmen walked in with you, Carmen rolled his eyes.
“Shut the fuck Richie, get to work.” Carmen shook his head as he led you through the kitchen.
“What brings you here sweets?” Richie asked you as he gave you a hug, you smiled.
“Didn’t feel like staying home, I need to get out and enjoy life before the little one comes.” Richie nodded as he continued to work.
Tina smiled as she walked up to you giving you a hug and a kiss before rubbing your bump. “How are you doing mama? Baby doing good?”
You smiled at Tina’s comfort, “Healthy baby, but it’s killing me.” You whined making Tina frown.
“Aye, poor thing. You need anything?”
“Not right now, I’m okay thank you.” Carmen yelled something at the others, as you walked towards his office.
“Oh, hey Y/N!” You quickly turned to see Sydney waving, you quickly smiled at you and gave her a hug.
“Hey Syd! How you doing?”
“Good, good, and you?”
“Ugh, it’s hard dealing with a fetus in your stomach.” You joked as you rubbed your bump.
“Well hey, almost time y’know?”
You nodded with a smile, “I can’t wait.” You quickly said goodbye as Carmen led you to sit in his office chair.
“You hungry or anything?” He asked you as he ran a hand over your back, you shook your head.
“Not at the moment.” You shrugged
“Alright, let me know if anything.” He quickly gave you a kiss to your lips making you sigh.
“Love you.” You said with a smile making him smile back.
“Love you more.”
It’s been over two hours already and you starting to get cranky. You were whining as you had your head down. Your back was killing you and you felt a headache coming on from the heat from the kitchen. You whined as you slowly got up before wincing as your back started to hurt. You rubbed your bump as you opened the office door entering the kitchen.
“Guys, I fucking told you a million times! Get your shit together, I’m not fucking playing!” Carmen yelled as everyone yelled “Yes Chef!” In unison. Carmen sighed before he spotted you with a frown on your face.
“Hey baby, you okay? What’s wrong?” He cupped your face as he examined your features.
“I’m getting hungry carm, it’s hot I’m dying! And my back is hurting!” You said a little too loud, Carmen cursed in his mind knowing you were getting cranky.
“I’m sorry babe, you wanna sit by the booths? You might cool off better there. And you want something to eat?” He led you to the entrance of the diner, before you stopped him.
“No Carmen, nothing is helping me. I’m tired and hungry and it’s making me upset!” You could feel tears forming making Carmen cringe.
“Hey, hey, hey. Relax, I know baby. I’m sorry that you’re going through this. Just take a deep breath and I’ll make you something to eat, what do you feel like having, hm?” He said softly not wanting to make you more upset, he quickly rubbed your back making you whimper as small tears fell down your face.
“I-I I don’t know what I want to eat! Basically anything I eat makes me puke! I can’t take it anymore!” You were starting to get more loud making everyone in the kitchen look at you and Richie finally blew it.
“Jesus Christ! Why did you even come if you’re gonna act like a bitch?” Richie yelled from the other side, everyone turned to look at Richie who had a frown on his face.
“Richie!” Carmen yelled back at his cousin making Richie shake his head.
“Nah! Because why the fuck is she here if she’s gonna be bitchy about everything? Make that make sense to me!”
“Richie, you better shut the fuck up! She’s pregnant, I don’t care if she’s here or not! Don’t make me fucking hurt you cousin!”
“Let me see you try, jagoff.” Richie said with a sarcastic chuckle. Carmen’s eyes twitched.
“Don’t even start with me Richie! You’re the fucking jagoff, don’t start with that bullshit I-
Carmen stopped his yelling when he heard a sniffle and a whimper. Everyone turned to look at you, tears fell down your face as you hiccuped.
“I-I’m sorry.” You said through broken sobs, everyone just froze as they watched you cry.
“Baby.” Carmen said softly as he quickly walked over to you. “Hey, look at me.” You pushed his hands away as you shook your head. You then turned around and walked over to the back door, you opened the door as you went outside to the cool breeze.
Everyone just stood there in silence, then looked at Richie.
“What the fuck is wrong with you Richie! How dare you do such a thing to that poor girl! She’s pregnant for god sake!” Tina yelled at Richie as she slapped his arm with a frown.
“Not cool Richie, seriously.” Marcus said with a shook of his head as he followed Tina outside.
“Do better Richie, honestly.” Sydney said as she followed the rest outside to console you.
Richie just stood there frozen with his mouth slightly opened.
“What the fuck is your problem!?!” Carmen roared as he shoved Richie into a wall nearby, making Richie stumble.
“Chill Carmen!”
“No, you chill! How are you gonna say that to her huh?!?! Don’t you have a kid?!?! Didn’t you deal with this too?!? How dare you come at Y/N like that! She didn’t deserve that shit! She’s seven fucking months pregnant! Of course she’s gonna feel like shit!” All Carmen saw was red as his shoulders rose up and down from his yelling rant. His heart was pounding as his hand shook under Richie’s shirt he had a grip on.
“Chill the fuck out Carmen! I’m sorry, that just came over me! I mean it! I didn’t mean for that happen, I just let my inner thoughts get to me! I know she didn’t deserve that. I’m sorry alright?” Richie said in a calming voice to get Carmen to calm down.
Carmen gave him a glare as he let go his shirt, “You better fucking apologize to her, not me. Understand?” Richie nodded with hands in surrender, Carmen huffed as he first walked outside, Richie behind him.
You had your head buried in your hands as Tina comforted you, your head rested on her shoulder as she rubbed your back in comfort , your shoulders shook with each sob.
“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for-for that to-to happen.” You whimpered, making Tina shake her head.
“Nonsense mija, you are carrying a child. You have every right to feel this way. Richie is being an asshole, don’t let him get to you mama.”
You removed your hand away from your face before looking up to see Carmen and Richie. Tina moved away but not before giving your head a peck as she told everyone to go back inside, leaving you, Carmen, and Richie alone.
You looked down at your feet, not making eye contact with either of the men. Carmen didn’t say anything as he walked up to you and wrapped his arms around you.
You couldn’t help but feel more tears fall down as you softly cried into his chest. Carmen softly shushed you as he rubbed your back knowing it was hurting you. He whispered sweet nothing in your ear as he kissed your head and forehead repeatedly.
“I-I I’m sorry, I didn’t m-mean for this to happen.” You said through hiccups, Carmen shook his head.
“Hey, no, stop that. This wasn’t your fault baby. You’re pregnant, you have every right to be mad, upset, and sad. This is a hard time for you. But you should’ve stayed home baby. It’s always chaotic here, and I don’t want that to overwhelm you. I want you to be okay and feel comfortable. I know it’s hard for you, but I’m here always for you okay?”
He cupped your face making you look up at him, your lip trembled as tears fell down your cheeks. He quickly wiped them away, before kissing your lips a few times. He gave you a hug making you wrap your arms around his waist, enjoying his touch.
“I love you, y’know that?” He said softly in your ear making you nod in his chest. He swayed you back and forth before facing Richie, who had a frown on his face.
“I think Richie has something to say to you too.” Carmen said softly making you open your eyes to see Richie with a sad frown. He cleared his throat before speaking.
“I’m sorry for what I said to you Y/N, I really am. I admit I was being a jagoff and all that shit I said was wrong and that you don’t deserve that. But, I hope you can forgive me because you’re my family and I don’t want to hurt you like that again.”
You actually felt another set of tears coming at Richie’s apology, you loved Richie as family. You hated what he said to you, but how can you not forgive him.
“Oh Richie, of course I forgive you. I’m sorry that I triggered you to go off on me. I’m sorry, you’re a sweet man and I know you didn’t mean it.” You hiccuped as you walked over to Richie before wrapping your arms around his waist bringing him into a hug. Richie’s eyes went wide, not expecting you to forgive him so easily. He tensed up as you hugged him, but quickly relaxed and wrapped his arms around you.
“I’m sorry kid, really. I was an asshole for that.” He said softly as he rubbed your back in comfort making you look up at him with a smile. You stood on your tippy toes before pecking his cheek with a smile making him smile back at you. You turned to face Carmen who walked over to you and Richie.
“Don’t pull that shit again cousin or I swear I will beat your ass.” Richie rolled his eyes at him.
“Yeah, yeah cousin, I got it. Jesus.” He shook his head making you chuckle a bit at the two men.
“You still hungry baby?” Carmen asked you as the three of you walked back into the kitchen. You nodded your head at that.
“I’m having those cravings again actually.” You said as you held onto Carmen’s hand. He led you to the booths in the front, Carmy smiled.
“What’s the craving today?” Carmen said as the two of you sat down at a booth.
“Pickles and ice cream.” You said with a smile making Carmen give you a disgusting look. You smacked his arm before laughing.
“How the fuck do you enjoy that?” He said as he got up, you laughed.
“It’s not me, it’s the baby!” You put your hands up in surrender.
“Sure it is baby.” He said with a smile before leaning down to kiss you before entering the kitchen.
“Marcus! Get me a cup of the ice cream you made and Tina! Get me some pickles! Y/N is having her weird ass cravings again!”
“Carmen! Don’t announce it to everyone!
Tag-List: @otomefan @chunnies @slasherstories123 @avengersfan25 @th3h0nkz
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solarlunarsstuff · 8 months
Note
HEY! i adore your writing :) i was wondering if you could write a semi long one shot abt reader riding mike and him being super sensitive and him whining and moaning and calling him a good boy and maybe like… spitting in his mouth… LMAOOOO
LMAO, U READ MY MIND FR ALSO, UR LITERALLY MY FIRST ASK, TY FOR THAT HERES AN AWARD 4 YOU🏅
·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙
☆ Her Whiny Boy ☆
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Synopsis: Even if he started the teasing it'll always end in him being a big whiny mess, and him being so sensitive.
Tw: Dacryphilia, spitting, foul language, sub!Mike and dom!Reader, dick riding, marking, penatrative sex (p in v), and pet names.
A/n: ILYYY FOR THE REQUEST GIVING YOU BIG FOREHEAD KISSIES MWAH🫶🫶🫶
·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙
For a start, Mike and you have been friends since you were both about 5 years old. He was sitting on the elementary school's swing.
You obviously decided to talk to him. That was about 20 years ago, you yourself thought that the relationship wouldn't go that far but here you are now.
Sitting on Mike's bed while he was all hot and bothered, all pressed up against you. He had his lips attached to yours for the past 10 minutes, Mike wanted more. He needed more.
But you knew, oh you knew how to pull his strings. Mike was leaning against the headrest of his bed with you straddling his lap.
You started to slowly grind into him, you tugged on his hair lightly to see his reaction. Mike's moan was muffled between the heated make out.
"F-fuck, {Y/n}, pl-please" he whined out.
You knew he needed it, but you don't want to just hand it to him, no no. You had to tease him back.
You didn't answer but you did grind down harder, he let a groan move past his lips while his head lolled back.
"Hmmm, how about I get you a little ready first? Sounds good, ay?" You taunted his neediness
Fuck he looked so hot, he looked so disheveled that it was attractive. His hair sticking to his sweaty forehead, you and Mike were both fully dressed making it a bit hard to get friction.
You reached your arms out for the hem of his shirt to pull it over his head, he obliged and puts his arms up for more access.
Once you got his shirt over he wanted you to take yours off but you thought otherwise, you instantly grabbed his hands and put it to your hips that were still moving up along his crotch area.
"No, you're not allowed to touch me just yet." You reminded him
Mike whined once again, shit you needed more. You got up off of him and looked down, he had a spot on his pants that were wet. That was sent straight to your core making you soak your pretty black laced panties.
Fuck it. You pulled your top up and over yourself to reveal that you didn't have anything under, you took note that Mike had been palming himself through his jeans.
You moved closer to him letting out a big huff while gripping the sides of his pants and pulling them down past him ankles, catching his boxers along with it and onto the floor where your top was.
You were nearly drooling at his cock, he twitched making him embarrassed and tried covering his beautiful face. While giving him a few experimental pumps and saw how his tip leaked a bit of precum and he grew a bit bigger which you thought was impossible.
You let go and stood up off the bed and onto the floor to shimmy out of your own pants, also catching your laced panties and tossing it into the pile of clothing on the wooden floor.
Crawling back onto him, straddling his thighs while pumping him a little again. You brought your right hand up to your mouth and spit just to lather it into his ready dick.
Mike moaned through his anticipation of wanting to touch you. He wanted to touch you, your body, your everything. Mike needed to touch your soft skin with his rough hands.
"You can touch me now, Mike." You finally replied
Mike was so eager he dove straight for your breasts, massaging them and giving them kitten licks so they would harden from his heated muscle.
You reached for his head and shoved it into your chest more, he was like a starved man. He took the opportunity and used his whole mouth sucking and leaving hickeys on your breast so he could see them turn into a pretty purple later on.
While he was stuffed between your tits, he looked up at you with his beautiful brown colored eyes, it broke something in you.
You pulled his head away by tugging a bit harder on his hair to move him, he let out a hng from the pressure. That made your core dampen even more.
You lifted yourself up a bit and grabbed the length of his cock and positioned it in front of your sopping entrance.
You sat your whole weight down into him, you both whined in unison. Your eyes rolled back while you sat there for a moment to make sure you could adjust to his size.
You slowly started to move, you were steadily sat on his lap. Mike's cock buried deep in you, you'd think he'd split you, which he was. But you loved every single second of it.
"{Y/n}- hiccup -fuckkkk, need more. Need t' move in you." Mike complained
God he was a mess and loved him because of how he acted. At this point you started to bounce on him, he couldn't take it. Mike had reached his arms out and had a death grip on your hips.
He moved you up and down with his hands on your hips, his breathing was unsteady and his whimpers and cries of shit don't stop, m' so close didn't help you out either.
"Open your mouth." You demanded him
He indulged and open his mouth along with lolling his tongue out, you used your left hand to hold his face in place while your right was resting on his thigh for stability.
While still riding him you spat in his mouth and called him dirty slurs while you assisted his dick that was stretching you out greedily.
"Hah, being- fuck. Being such a good boy f' me aren't you.. letting me spit in your mouth." You mocked at him
Your walls spasmed around his cock that told him you were close, you rested your hands on his shoulders.
"I'm gonna- fuckin' cu-!" You blurted out
Your sopping wet cunt tightened our him and came, leaving your slick on his cock and lower stomach.
He was ramming into you at this point, his dick was kissing your cervix which made you want to cum again.
As soon as you came back from your delusions, he came, and hard. You swear your eyesight went white.
You were both breathing heavily from your highs.
"You did so good.." you mumbled while collapsing onto Mike's chest.
He didn't say anything but tightened the embrace and kissed your forehead.
·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚·̩̩̥͙**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚
A/n: I feel like I did a shitty job one this one but I did it woo-hoo! Also I'm sorry again if it's to short my luvs :(
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taylormarieee · 19 days
Text
Fuck me like you want me MiggyMiguel O'Hara
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Summary: Your desperate for Miguel after he gets out of the shower...
Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x Fem!Hispanic!Reader
Word Count: 1.5k
Warnings: PiV sex, Dirty talk, Needy reader, Dom!Miguel, Sub!Reader, Praise Kink, Degrading Kink, V-Line obsession, Breeding Kink, Begging, Orgasm Denial, Established Relationship
A/N: This is dedicated to my princess @ribbonprincess since technically today is her birthday so Happy birthday my love!
BIRTHDY FIC 1/3
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You and Miguel were the best couple. Not only was he the famous Spider-Man but he was also a scientist.
You were a Bartender so you had to work nights. Not all the time Miguel liked it but he couldn't really complain because he always had emergency calls at the spider society during sex making him grumpy for the rest of the night.
Or people from his Firm needed him to solve an experiment for them. Either way you both were extremely busy but you always found time for each other nonetheless.
When you guys had dinner together it was always enjoyable leading to sex all night.
You two have a great relationship but Miguel could be a bit of a tease. And granted you did love it, it was stressful when you were pent up and he said no.
You were waiting for Miguel to get out of the shower, you were sitting on the toilet in the bathroom as the room fogged up and you reminisced in the heat.
The glass to the shower was blurry and fogged up so all you could see was his figure and his tanned skin.
"Miggy, please!?" You begged, "I need you. I'm so horny right now and you know what that means." You finalize with a hint so Miguel would get it.
It's clear you were ovulating and that explains why your extremely horny. So you hoped hinting to it would make Miguel relent his torture with the word no but-
"No Carino, Te amo querida pero no." He finalized his no and you pout.
(No Darling, I love you dear but no.)
"Pero Miguel, ¿pensé que me amabas? Realmente te necesito." You whine.
(But Miguel, I thought you loved me? I really need you.")
He shakes his head and steps out the shower. His towel hugging his slutty waist and nice toned body.
His toned abs flexing when he breathes and his chest heaving while he slowly breathes in and out.
You stare at him, mouth wide open as you admire your boyfriend. His body nice and wet from getting out the shower.
His hair slicked back from him running his large, long fingers through his silky soft hair.
"Damn Miguel, Te ves muy bien mojada. Hablando de estar mojado..." You smirk at him and he chuckles shaking his head.
(You look very good wet. Speaking of being wet…)
"Princesa, te amo pero no ahora".
(Princess, I love you but not right now.)
You pout your lips a little more and make your doe eyes bigger. He looks at you, sighs before shaking his head no and walking over to the sink.
You watch as he walks over to the sink, admiring his body. The way his abs flex, his slutty waist, his V-line, his happy trail and etc. Ugh you loved his arms as well.
The faint scratches left from a few nights ago on his back, the hickeys you left him this morning before he woke up.
He looked like a fucking god to you. His big muscles and broad back. The more you looked at him the more you set yourself up for failure.
"Miggy..."
"Princessa..." He warns giving you a stern look. You look at him with pouty lips and finally just walk out the bathroom.
"Fine. I guess I'll go ask Hobie if he's in the mood for some good hispanic pussy." You say as you walk towards the bed to grab your phone to call Hobie.
Miguel's eyes widen, Hobie was insufferable so he quickly went to you and snatched the phone out your hand before you could even press his name to call.
"Princessa... always so needy aye? Aye dios mio que voy a hacer contigo?" he says in a low seductive voice.
(Oh my god, what am I going to do with you?)
"What you can do is fuck the shit outta me no questions asked..." You say with your best puppy dog eyes. You were being extra clingy today, you blame the fact that your ovulating.
He picks you up and kisses you roughly. "Such a bad girl... you gonna be a good slut for me?" He asks as he throws you on the bed and begins ripping your clothes off.
You nod your head and whine at the feeling of the cool air brushing your pussy lips. Clit sore and throbbing as the feeling gets more intense by the second just looking at Miguel.
"I need words Mi amor, words." He says as his long fingers rub tight figure eights on your clit. You squirm and whine and mumble out an "Yes miggy! I'll be a good s-slut for you!"
He smirks and drops his towel his big fat juicy cock making it's lovely appearance. Your mouth instantly started watering at the sight. He ran his cock along your wet slick folds and you whimper at the friction.
In your mind you wanna just grind on him and force his cock to slide into your soaking entrance but you keep repeating in your mind 'Be a good girl, be a good girl' because you know how mean Miguel can get when your not a good girl.
You stay still and let him do his work while you watch him get his cock nice and wet with your arousal. "Miggy pleaseee, i-ive been good haven't I?" you ask, whining at how good his cock feels on your folds.
He chuckles darkly before inhaling sharply at the feeling of his leaking tip slip in your entrance. "Yea, you've been a good girl princess. I guess you can get this dick now." he replies pushing further into you.
You let out a whine at the stretch your pussy is making to accommodate Miguels fat cock. your eyes roll to the back of your head as you let out a content sigh and close your eyes after finally getting what you've been begging for.
"Mierda my love, your so tight." he whispers against your ear, burying his face in your neck.
Your cunt clenches at Miguels voice and his words. You tap his shoulder as a sign to start moving and he begins to grind against you.
Slowly pulling his cock all the way out till the tip is only in and then plunging himself right back into your warm cunt.
"Oh fuck Miguel!" you cry out as he continues his relentless pace on your cunt. Your body feels like it's floating and you feel so euphoric with Miguel inside you.
his thrusts sending you into a state of pleasure, you don't even care if the neighbors complain about the headboard hitting the wall, all you cared about was Miguel and this moment, this moment that has been put off for so long.
Your hands embracing his large back and arms leaving more marks on his his god-like body. "Fuck beautiful, you feel so good, gonna cum in this pretty pussy yea?" he groans out.
"Wanna give you all my babies yea? Have all my kids, wanna see your belly nice and swole holding my child." He whispers in your ear, you moan out.
"Yes yes yes! I wanna have your babies Miggy, please!" you cry out as his pace surprisingly gets faster.
"Good girl, such a good girl for me." He praises. Your on the edge, and that praise it's self was enough to throw you over the edge but miguel feels how your tensing up.
He feels how your pussy is squeezing him so well. He pulls out before you could even touch the feeling of pleasurable heaven, before you could even relish and drown in the pool of pleaseure.
"Oh mi amor, you thought that you were gonna cum that easily? tsk tsk, no no mi amor, I need to cum in this pretty pussy first. Make sure all my cum stays in there nice, tight and warm." He says
You cry out at the feeling of being empty before your filled right back up to the brim with Miguels big fat cock.
After a couple more thrusts and dirty talk, Miguel is almost there. He's so close to cumming and giving you his babies.
He's never wanted anything so badly then to see you bare his child. To see you walk around with clothes that barely fit cause your stomachs always poking out.
To be able to feel the first kick of that baby growing in your stomach. Nothing has ever clouded and made his lust more powerful then fantasizing about you having his child inside you.
"Fuck fuck fuck! Gonna c-cum, fuck i'm gonna cum in this pussy muñeca." he groans
He thrusts 3 more times before he stills inside of you shooting his sperm inside you, the feeling of him painting your walls white carries you over the edge and you feel the wave of pleasure rush over your body as you shake and convulse from your mind-blowing orgasm.
"Fuck!" you cry out as you grip onto his shoulders to ground yourself. You close your eyes trying to catch your breath as Miguel begins to pull out.
He watches as some of him cum seeps out of your cunt. He uses his finger to push all of it back inside you.
He climbs up o your face and gives you a sweet kiss on your temple and a passionate kiss on your lips.
"Can't wait to have such a domestic life with you mama." he says with a smile on his face.
"I love you miggy"
"I love you more princessa."
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Taglist:@oharaslover @willyoubemycherryy @cherryredstarsreblogs /@cherryredstars @versatilehater @dustbunniess / @evbunnie
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cottonconnielvr · 1 year
Text
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PAIRINGS ✩ — plug!connie x hyperfem!black!reader
WARNINGS ✩ — ts kinda nasty when I think abt it, sub!connie, handjob, kissing, smoking, cum eating, daddy kink
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CONNIE’S back laid in between your thighs, his head resting on your stomach. You were sat up, resting all your weight on the headboard. Your pink acrylic nails wrapped around Connie’s neck.
You were bent over as you pressed kisses onto Connie’s cheek, your fenty lipgloss staining his cheek. Connie laid comfortably, counting money.
Summer Walker quietly played from the tv. You lightly bit Connie’s cheek before sucking on the spot. Connie liked being absolutely smothered in your love plus it felt kind of good.
Your hums to ‘Anna Mae’ vibrated onto Connie’s cheek, your nails lightly grazing his neck.You released his cheek, the spot looking light reddish.
“Oops” You gave the spot one more kiss. “I gave you a hickey” He turned his head towards you.
“You tryna have people think you beat on me and shit” he laughed, wrapping a band around the stack.
“You are so cute I just wanna eat your face” You dragged your acrylic nail down his face, tapping his nose. You squished his cheeks together before kissing his pouted lips multiple times. You didn’t give him any time to speak, just suffocating him with your affection.
“You’re so good to me. Always taking care of me, can I take care of you pa?” You innocently ask, your lips still brushing against his. His eyes close and you can feel his body melt into yours, feeling a little needy. “Yeah” he softly breathed out.
The way this big ass angry tattooed drug dealer was being held by you, feeling so so vulnerable. You ran your hands down his white tee, pulling it up slightly. You rubbed at his lower stomach, pulling a groan from Connie.
“Gonna make you feel really good” You kissed at Connie’s neck as he tilted his head, giving you access to his sensitive neck.
Your hand reached under his grey sweats, rubbing his length over his boxers. You could hear small whiny breaths coming from Connie as you slipped your hand under the band. You tugged his heavy hard length out into sight. His tip pink and leaking, the base fading into a darker brown. Both of you guys were focused on what you were doing to him. He licked his lips, making them glossy and wet.
“Why do you have to be so cute, sexy, and adorable?” You kissed his wet lips. Connie was too focused on your hand stroking his dick. Your smooth palm twisting right on his tip, getting his pre-cum all over your hand.
You watched as you mindlessly sucked on Connie’s neck, starting to fasten your pace.
“Ay coño” Connie breathed out, his hips bucking into your hand.
“Does it feel good?” You squeeze him at the base of his cock.
“mhmm” He nods his head. You smile before repeating his famous saying, “Use your words”
Connie gasped as your thumb rubbed over his tip, circling around. “Yeah.. y-yes fuck” Connie’s thighs clenched, feeling so good. The bottom of his white tee was clenched between his teeth, trying to refrain from moaning as loud as he wants to.
You took notice of that, “Don’t do that daddy I wan’ hear you” Connie’s cock pulsed at the petname.
“Say it again” Connie whined as you tortured his tip with your hand.
“You gonna cum daddy?” You now have both hands twisting up and down his cock. Connie’s chest heaved up and down as his toes curled in his socks.
“Y-y…esss” Connie went limp in your hands, his cum oozing out of his tip. You slowly twist and squeeze his base, making sure to empty his fully.
You hear Connie wince as you still stroke his cock. You let go, looking at all of the cum on your hand.
You bring your hand up to Connie’s mouth, his tongue licking up alll his cum. Connie was pretty shocked at the action, his cock rising once again.
“How ‘bout I ride you until you cry” You suggest to Connie, your boobs all in his face.
What a horny monster he created
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exhaslo · 1 month
Note
I KNOW IM LATE FOR EASTER BUT WHAT IF Y/N DRESSED AS A LITTLE BUNNY W/ THOSE BUNNY SUITS TEASING MIGUEL WHILE HE'S WORKING THEN CATCHING Y/N OFF BY FUCKING HER SENSELESS?? (You should include "Want a carrot" and just include Miguel simply making y/n give him a BJ >_<) ITS ONLY IF U WANT TO BTW YOU DONT NEED TO IF YOU DONT WANT TOO :(
AND I'M TOTALLY LATE IN RESPONDING LOLOLOLOLOLOL
Warning: MINORS DNI, SMUT, oral (m-receiving), role play, teasing, dirty talk, rough sex, breeding kink
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"Alright, the Spider-Society should be pretty quiet today, so no one should notice me sneak in. You'll take care of the cameras, right Lyla?"
There you were, standing nervously in front of a mirror while speaking to the AI. Today was Easter and you had wanted to surprise Miguel while he was working. Give him a little stress free day while having some fun.
"Yep, just say the word when you're there and I shall get those doors open for you. Not a single soul will know you're there!" Lyla said with a chirp.
That gave you some relief. You were Miguel's girlfriend for two years now. You knew about his secret life and happily supported him any way you could. And right now, Miguel needed a break! He had been hold up in either Alchemax or the Spider Society for about three days now.
What better than to give him a little treat on Easter?
You took deep breathes as you fixed your tight bunny suit. The tail so cute and fluffy and the ears were being held in your coat pocket. It was difficult to make your way to Miguel's secret second life without anyone questioning your trench coat.
Once Lyla gave you the all clear, you rushed into the building. Normally, the Spider Society was impossible to enter for normal people. Miguel didn't want anyone accidently stumbling in. Which was why you had to rely on Lyla.
Chuckling nervously as you followed Lyla's directions, you were starting to feel the heat rise to your face.
This idea sounded so good in your head.
Placing the bunny ears on, you couldn't help but admire the structure of the building. Everything was so different and unique. Made for a Spider. Resisting a chuckle, you hurried to Miguel's office. The place really was empty.
"Alright, best of luck," Lyla said with a grin before disappearing.
You took a deep breathe before entering that dark lair. Dropping your trench coat, you proudly showed off your sexy bunny suit. A nervous smile against your lips as you saw Miguel on his platform, grunting and complaining about why it was lowering.
"Aye! Lyla!" Miguel hissed. You just smiled,
"Sounds like someone needs help from a little bunny~" You cooed. Miguel jolted slightly before turning to face you,
"(Y/N)? What are-What are you wearing?!"
"Happy Easter, Miggy. Care to feed this bunny a carrot for the long trip?" You asked, your hands stroking down his chest.
Miguel scoffed softly, capturing your lips in a kiss. He licked your lower lip, grunting softly as you started to stroke his dick through his suit.
"Amor (love), you could have gotten caught,"
"I had help,"
You got on your knees, kissing and licking Miguel's crotch. Your glossy eyes glancing up at him, waiting for him to cave and get rid of his suit. With another grunt, you got your wish and began to swirl your tongue against the length of his shaft.
Miguel groaned and grunted to every lick and stroke you gave him. Happy to see this reaction, you placed your lips against his tip and began to suck. His hands resting against your head, guiding you against his harden cock.
"What a bad bunny," Miguel hummed, "Sneaking into this place just for a quick fuck?"
"MhO mphm a (Who said anything about quick?)" You said to say.
"Shit,"
Miguel gripped your hair, fastening your pace. He moaned and whined against his cock, causing Miguel to lean forward. You knew that the vibrations of you talking against his dick sent shivers down his spine.
Which was why you liked to do it.
With another whine, you felt his dick hit the back of your throat. Your rolled your eyes back as heat pooled down to your cunt. Miguel grunted as he thrusted once more into the back of your mouth, cumming. With a hard swallow, you pulled away, panting softly,
"Someone...needed that..." You said with a soft chuckle.
"Says the one seducing me," Miguel lifted you up with ease, kissing you firmly, "Does my little bunny want this carrot anywhere else?"
Before you could say anything, Miguel's fingers were already over your soaked sex. You shuddered and whined as his fingers easily made a bigger mess of your suit that it already was. With a smirk, Miguel used his talon to rip the cloth over your pussy.
"M-Miguel! I spent a lot on this suit!" You pouted. Miguel silenced you with another kiss,
"Then I'll buy another. Can't keep my horny bunny waiting too long."
"Mphm~!"
You flung your head back as Miguel laid you against his desk, sliding his cock inside your folds. With ease, Miguel made himself at home with his dick kissing your cervix. Your gummy walls tightening around him so perfectly.
"Does my little horny bunny enjoy this?" Miguel pressed his hips against yours, causing you to moan and squirm, "You know what they say about that, right?"
You shuddered in response, holding onto Miguel as he slowly thrusted inside of you. Your whines not bothering him as he continued to torment you. His slow pace making you wetter as you tried to move your own hips to fasten the pace.
"Guess my bunny really wants a baby,"
"Mhm~ Ah~ M-Migueeeeeeel~" You whimpered.
Miguel leaned down to kiss you once more before he finally picked up his pace. His hands against your hips as his thrusts began rapid and rough. Your body shivering as you felt jolts run up your spine. Your cunt convulsing against Miguel's cock as you cam around him.
"Feel that? My bunny can't wait to be filled by me," Miguel whispered in your ear.
Your moans were getting louder as Miguel abused your cunt. Your head spinning as you focused on his dick. Miguel chuckled as he kissed you before slapping himself once more, giving you the first of many loads of his cum.
"Is this a tail I feel?" Miguel chuckled as he turned you on your stomach. His eyes sparkling at the sight, "How tempting. How long has my horny bunny been planning this?"
"Hn~!" You gripped onto the edge of his desk as Miguel entered your filled pussy again, "J-Just...ah~ ah~"
"Can't hear you," Miguel started his rough pace again, enjoying the sloppy sounds of your juices against his cock, "Want my babies that bad, little bunny?"
"Yesh~ Yesh~" You cried out, feeling your core burning once more.
"Then can my bunny keep up with me?"
You gasped as Miguel pinched your clit, causing you to come undone by him. Your body trembling in pleasure as his cock kept thrusting inside of you. Miguel lifted your ass up slightly, hitting you deeper than before.
"Good girl,"
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"Hm? Is my horny bunny finally waking up?" Miguel asked with a soft chuckle.
You groaned softly, feeling sore and groggy. Fluttering your eyes open, you noticed that you were back at Miguel's home. With a deep inhale, you nuzzled your head against his chest, wanting to sleep for a bit longer.
"Awe, can't have that. It's still Easter, and as far as I know...my cute little dirty bunny hasn't had her fill yet."
"Miggy...." You whined, looking into his lustful eyes, "You need to destress more often."
"I am," Miguel chuckled as he pinned you against the bed, "Now, let's keep making that baby."
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HOPE YOU ENOJYED!!!!
Hopefully the next holiday request I update in time, hahaaaaa
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morgluvsconnie · 4 months
Text
when connie first saw you, he knew you were the one.
what does that mean?
“ay, y/n. this my homeboy connie. connie, this y/n.” ony said, throwing his arm over your shoulders. “hey.” you said, waving with a little smile. “wassup.” a seemingly uninterested connie spoke back.
on the outside, he didn’t really care for no kind of introduction. but on the inside, was this boy dyinggg.
when he looked up from rolling, he had to double take. the way your dress hugged your body, the way you looked in general, the way your voice sounded too. lorddd.
and the fact that you could see exactly what you were wearing underneath made it so much better.
you didn’t immediately try to flirt with him when you first saw him, and that’s what made you even more perfect.
he wanted to stare more, but he wasn’t a simp or nothing. so he focused back on the blunt he was rolling. or… that’s what he thought he was doing until he sat back and looked back up at you as ony talked about how he thought you two would be good friends.
“i mean y’all ain’t that much alike but shit, sumn like that.” ony said before sitting down next to connie. as you stood there awkwardly, connie glanced at you, scooting over a little. “you can sit down. ion bite.” he mumbled.
you weren’t familiar with this friend group. the only person you knew was mikasa. and eren, but that’s only because that was her boyfriend, and mikasa was something like your best friend.
but when you saw connie, it was different.
he was laid back, but didn’t look boring. he didn’t look too intimidating, and he didn’t immediately try to flirt with you for no reason.
“how come i never seen you around here?” was the first question he asked. “ion be around these typa parties.” you brushed your hand through your freshly did hair, looking around.
“whatchu mean by that?” he said, putting the blunt to his lips and flicking the lighter. he stood up to put the tray on the table, and instead of sitting back down beside you, he sat on the low table in front of the couch you were on.
“i meannn, ion know nobody here.” you looked at him. quickly scanning him, he had a slightly fluffy buzz cut that he seemingly hasn’t had cut in a while, other than the sides.
his ears were pierced on both sides, the shining lights of the party making them sparkle every few seconds.
“who you tryna get introduced to?” he asked.
“you.” you said, staring up at him with a small smile. connie looked at you before smacking his lips and shaking his head. “i can’t describe myself. i’m connie, grey hair, one tat, i smoke, what else you wanna know?”
“you look like you got hoes.” you completely disregarded his question, making him raise his eyebrows.
“really.”
“yes, really.” you tilted your head a little.
connie clicked his tongue and looked at the ceiling.
“i mean, unless you don’t.” you pursed your lips together and raised your eyebrows. “i don’t.” connie slowly started to smile.
you rolled your eyes playfully and stood up. “right…”
before you could go anywhere, he grabbed your wrist. “you leavin?”
“to drink.” you looked back at him.
“you comin back?”
you looked at him for a second before laughing softly and patting his hand. “see you later, connie.”
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verstarppen · 9 months
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summary; there's little time between fast cars and spaceships, but you make it work
pairing; lando norris x fem! star wars actress! reader [ no faceclaim ] a/n; sorry for not posting i was planning the funeral for max's winning streak and mourning please excuse me ALSO THANK YOU FOR 250 FOLLOWERS I WOULD DIE FOR YOU ALL [ series masterlist ]
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liked by alex_albon, oscarpiastri, danielricciardo and 983,212 others
yndeathtrooper escaped the after party for a walk
view all 277,322 comments
spookyscaryscuderia the only people on earth who will leave THE EMMYS for a CHICKEN WRAP
alex_albon My invite didn't arrive it's fine guys
danielricciardo Mine neither yndeathtrooper pay the bill alex_albon YOU'RE A MILLIONAIRE yndeathtrooper BITCH YOU TOO
astongoatin i'm obsessed with them help me
verstappler DAMN IT the after party pics would've gone hard
monte_carlos_55 live laugh love y/nlando
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liked by yn.jpg, oscarpiastri, danielricciardo and 667,389 others
lando.jpg january
view all 238,982 comments
oscarpiastri Oh the honor of being on a lando.jpg post
lando.jpg enjoy your 15 minutes of fame, mate
haas_shaker THE CAMERA PERSON???
sunbathepapaya the note :((((((((
wafflemango I can't believe I lived to witness Y/nlando make cookies live, what a time to be alive
maxmaxmaxsuper When was this?? What happened?? wafflemango Powder fight, choking on batter, Lando cut his finger THROUGH a strawberry, the oven gave out and they had to call the owner of the guest house beacuse it wouldn't turn on. BUT THEY SURVIVED and apparently it tasted good maxmaxmaxsuper I'm convinced these people are not real
481_landoscar Everyone please pray for Oscar Piastri. He's not dead, just third wheeling.
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liked by landonorris, danielricciardo, pascalispunk and 4,592,102 others
starwars Something is coming. Something dark.
Meet # MorganElsbeth , # ShinHati and  # HeraSyndulla. Experience the two-episode premiere of @ AhsokaOfficial, a Star Wars Original series, streaming August 23 only on @ DisneyPlus.
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pearlyricciardo ok but is y/n in those two episodes because im not watching otherwise
loleclerc y/n and lando did more marketing for this than any official account 💀💀
danielricciardo But will you be watching them with the star of the show? That's what I thought.
yndeathtrooper holy shit you're watching ahsoka with lars mikkelsen? danielricciardo I wish.
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liked by yndeathtrooper, oscarpiastri, landonorris and 281,322 others
mclaren Not long now, boys.⏳
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yndeathtrooper ay who's the guy on the right he's kinda cute
landonorris did you see this in a mirror like?? yndeathtrooper who are you
bellanorris CAN'T WAIT
sugarussell LET'S GO BOYS
stappenlover lando first win this year i'm calling it
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liked by yn.jpg, lando.jpg, maxverstappen1 and 119,902 others
daniel3.jpg Took my kids shopping
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yn.jpg thank you father
daniel3.jpg Please don't call me that lando.jpg ur daughter calls me daddy too daniel3.jpg Why would you tell me this
maxverstappen1 Did you get me the yogurt
yn.jpg yes sir 🫡 lando.jpg don't """"sir"""" this loser maxverstappen1 You can repeat that after you pass me yn.jpg LMAOOOOOOO
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liked by georgerussell63, oscarpiastri, mclaren and 1,808,644 others
yndeathtrooper bye cool hotel sorry for the broken headboard
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goosestappen you broke what
typicallyleclerc YOU CAN'T WATERBOARD THIS INFORMATION OUT OF ME Y'ALL ARE STRONGER FR
chewie_gum mOOOM Y/N AND LANDO ARE BEING WILD ON SOCIAL MEDIA AGAIN
solorgana GET IT GET IT GET IT
landonorris i am speed
yndeathtroopers you're so funny landonorris i know mclaren We wish you were. landonorris what the fuck
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pic credits: instagram and pinterest
taglist: @justdreamersdream @cha-hot @dl-yum @minkyungseokie @allywthsr (taglist is open!)
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sherewrytes · 2 months
Text
Ms. Good Grip
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Inspired by this song
If you know you know. If you don't know how you know. Wanted to drop a fic with a more Caribbean inspo.
C.W : smut, Caribbean dialect, overstimulation, Caribbean black reader. Dom ony. Y/N be actin out
Your fav cousin wedding reception was in full swing. Drinks pouring, shots passing, weed smoke in the air all elders already left. You knew your boyfriend Ony wasn't used to Caribbean style parties. The pacing was completely from the usual parties he's used to. He was faded and tipsy, hands gripping your hips catching every whine you threw his way. You were completely bent over, if it wasn`t for your updo your hair would be touching the floor with how far you were bent over. You both took a break from dancing to get some drinks and more food before everyone's greedy ass ate it all up.
The song changed to Alkaline's on Fleek. As soon as you heard,
Whooo gyal yo pum, pum Gyal, yuh pum pum, Gyal, yuh pum pum on fleek.
You joined your other wild ass cousins in the dance circle and began whining. You made sure to position yourself right in front of Ony. You were secretly putting on all this show for him. All the weed and drinks had you wanting him. He looked so good in his semi casual fit You whined slowly at first slowly going lower to match the intro of the song staring him dead in his eyes while he smoked a joint with a bottle of Stag beer in his hand. His shades resting slightly lower on his nose. You watch him beckon you over with a finger, but you ignored him only because you loved riling him up at times, it makes the sex better.
You felt a hand grip your waist; you knew instantly it wasn't Ony's, but you decided to give the guy a lil dance. You cousin Shanice side eyed know mothing " Aye, you always lookin' for problems. You know how Ony's gonna react." You laughed saying "Oh well, small thing."
(Small thing- Trini slang for No big deal)
You heard the Dj scratch and the song changed to Spice's Jim Screechie
You were singing the song loud and clear while throwing it back on the random guy.
"And your gyal a watch you hard, but me no matter that Hold me tight and don't let me go Whine with me and me a whine with you"
You were giving him a wicked whine knowing for a fact that kinda whining is reserved for Ony but you thought "Oh well." The guy had one hand on your hips pulling you back against his hips while almost dry fuckin you on the makeshift dance floor. You felt a hand grab your wrist and pulled you. You looked up and saw it was Ony pulling you off the makeshift dance floor away from everyone.
"You got me fucked up; you know that. Are you goin out of your head or sum." Ony said his voice gruff with annoyance. You on the other hand were turned on by hearin' him this way. You smirked "It's just a dance Ony. I know you're suffering from not accustom. You bein' a black American I know you won't know much about my culture and shit."
You watch Ony's eye widen with annoyance "Oh really, you really wanna go that route with me. Imma give you a last chance to take that shit back." You rolled your eyes and giggled. "Still just a lil dance Ony." You attempted to walk away big mistake.
You knew it was your fault you were now in this situation. Your hands pressed and pinned against the toilet door with your back arched. Ony was feeding deep, hard strokes. You had to way to move, one of his hands pinned your hands against the door while the other was between your spread thighs rubbing your clit.
You felt your wetness run down your thigh, you were making a mess of yourself. You were coming again. You were pleading with him to take it easy on you "Ony 'm sor-sorry...please I can't"
"Nah, you can't, you weren't whining out there on him like you couldn't so nah you gon' take this dick. It's what you wanted right."
You were panting, moaning moaning his name as fucked you harder. You were now pressed against the door, his hand now pressed against the side of your neck. Between the hard slaps of his hips against yours and the song blaring in the background, you were losing your mind. You came twice already and feeling the third one fast approaching. He was rubbing your twitching clit. Rubbing so fast, your squirt was coming out faster than you realized. Your lust filled sobs were shaking your body and his, it only made him want to fuck you harder.
"Ony! Ony! Ouuu fuck I'm sorry 'm sorry please please please slow down." He stopped only to turn you over so you can be face to face as he lifted you up and pinned your back against the door again. You were both face to face. Ony's eyed still red from smoking.
"You always tryna test me and push me Y/N huh. You don't fuckin listen....actin up and showin out for WHO. that dude..playin' too much."
Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as your stomach clenched, you saw Ony smirk and slid his hand between both of your bodies and press down on your stomach. Your eyes widen while tears brimmed the corner. "Ouuu fuck! shit Ony..didn't mean to do it. why you fuckin me like this."
Ony tried to reign in his anger but her couldn't he felt it coming back, only pushing him to thrust deeper and harder "Don't play dumb with me Y/N you know I'm actin' like this."
Between Ony tearin your shit up and the music thumping in the background, you were close to another orgasm, tears now running down your face. Ony's hips practically pinning you between him and the door. Ony leaned in and kissed your tears away.
Ony finds your silence a bit annoying. After what felt like minutes, his hand gripped your throat. Through your teary eyes you could see you pushed Ony a bit to far but then again he knew how you were. He loved you for it.
Ony felt your body shivering against his. He kept feeding you deep, hard strokes which you were sure if the music wasn't loud as fuck everyone could hear. He felt his vexation simmering in his veins.
"Ony..please..I love you. I...Ony!" you pleaded. Ony rolled his eyes tired of hearing the same things over and over again come out of your mouth.
"Nah, love me, that's crazy Y/N. Do you really love me Y/N?" "I do Ony! I do. I won't do this shit again I swear...just.."
You were gripping around his dick so tightly he could feel his balls twitching and he fucked you against the door harder. He knew you loved pushing his buttons as much as you loved him. he wrapped your legs tighter around his hips, trying to go deep as he possibly can. You were so overstimulated you were shaking while pressed between the door and him.
"Fuck Y/N you're squeezin' me Gonna nut" you felt him fill you up groaning into your ear. You knew the amount he just came in you would leak out.
Ony sat you on the bathroom counter, helped you clean up then he cleaned up himself. You cleaned your face with make up wipes you had in your bag and reapplied your make up Ony smirked "You gon behave now my love" "Yes Ony I will"
You went back out the wedding party holding hands and smiling.
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marxo-fm · 3 months
Text
Take me to Church
✯ John Price x f!reader | Playlist
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Summary: A reader who’s so religious that she doesn’t even think of anything close to inappropriate, until she meets her dad’s best friend, Mr. John Price.
Words: 4.7k
Warnings: MDNI 18+, mature themes and language, age gap (reader is 25 and Price is in his early 40’s), religious trauma from Catholic variety, dad’s best friend, loss of virginity, pet names, slight aftercare in the end, fear of getting caught from reader, smut, assurance, fingering, reader isn’t all that clueless but super inexperienced, protected PIV, oral (fem! receiving), reader has some troubles with masturbation (failure to finish), Price teaches the reader how to feel good, praising, no descriptions of readers body, race, skin color, ethnicity, hair type/length and body type.
A/N: Currently don’t know wtf I’m doing with my life and how this absurdity came to mind, but aye, I’m all here for it. This was so…..!? Yeah. Also big shout out to Hozier, my icon. Side note: I truly apologize If this fic is rough, I will edit it soon but it’s mostly because I haven’t written in a hot minute, due to school and shit, but I’m back now—and I’m proud of this!
The breeze kisses your skin as you soak the sun's warmth on a Friday afternoon. The grass is green, and the clouds are out, summer has just begun. You feel yourself start to come back, you were struggling but now that’s over—for a bit. You look over as you watch your dad chopping wood. Usually, he has his friends helping out, but you guessed they had things to do, which explains why they weren’t here.
You memorized their names.
There’s Gaz, Simon, a man who goes by the name of ‘Soap’—which you find funny and you’re not sure if that’s his real name or if it’s just a nickname—and then…John.
Mr. Price. Or so you call him. Sir or Mr works just fine. But you never explored your unknown and strange feelings for him. How you always felt so shy around his dominating presence, or how his voice sounds like honey and sins. You prayed at night and asked for forgiveness when thinking of such thoughts you’ve never thought of when you see John.
Until one day in high school—in health class—they taught about intercourse and other things that left you baffled and quite scared. Anxious. Curious.
You’d get scolded by your Catholic parents when you asked such things, they say it’s too early to get into these topics, or that you should wait until marriage. Your parents are good, but you always follow their rules. You never once disobeyed, only minor times but you always asked for forgiveness.
You’ve always been a good girl, but Mr. Price always makes the fire in your belly grow. And that fire burns through your veins in an excruciating need for something so sinful. Maybe it’s the devil on your shoulder, but you never fight it off, and that was bad.
“Hey honey, ought to help me out here? The jerks I call my friends are out busy somewhere, c’mon, I’ll teach ya.” Your father motioned his hands as he walked to his area where he chops his wood, you’ve never done this before, but you’re excited. He gives you his axe, and you almost give out due to how heavy it is. “Can’t carry it like that sweet pie, hold it strong and firm.” He instructs.
You do as he says, squinting your eyes to look at his face of approval, “I think I got it.”
He nods and you bring the axe up to your shoulder, and you bring it down with every ounce of strength.
You chopped it.
“Attagirl, that’s one hell of a way to chop down wood.” A man with a deeper voice and a southern drawl said from right behind you, you turn around and the blood rushes to your head.
It’s John.
“Oh…Mr. Price,” you stammer, and you feel a rush of embarrassment plastering your cheeks.
“Y’know ya can call me John, right? Good job raisin’ her pal, she got manners.” He chews on his toothpick as he takes the axe from your hands, and the contact leaves you feeling vulnerable and so flustered. His rough hands that he used to work, chop wood, and fix things felt oddly familiar on your soft skin.
“We taught her well, ain’t that right darlin’?” John looks over his shoulder, his flannel covering his bulging biceps and that itself makes you feel thirsty for cold water.
“Yes, Dad,” you replied softly, “Well, I’m just going to head on over back home to help Mom out. Want anything to drink John?”
John looked at you momentarily, the way his name slipped out of your sweet mouth left him speechless. His eyes gaze over your white dress that sits just above your knees, it feels like he is undressing you, but he’s just wondering how and when the hell you looked like this. Of course, you were always beautiful, but there was something special there.
A spark.
“No ma’am.” He waved his hand and went back to work. You watched as his forearms grew bigger when he swung that axe down.
Forgive me for my sins.
You mumbled before you opened the door to your home and walked in.
“My baby’s such a bad girl, aren’t ya? Takin’ me so well.” John praises as he thrusts into you in sinister motions like he’s been deprived of something so good for such a long time, that it almost drove him over the wall.
How you felt so good, so welcoming, as his thrusts became deeper and faster. Touching parts of you that you didn’t even know existed—nor could feel. It was an out-of-body experience like your soul had ascended, and you didn’t know whether it was real.
Until your alarm woke you up. It wasn’t real, but gosh did it feel real. You’re sweating, and your heart is running a marathon, as you regain your breath, you feel like you committed a crime. A crime so punishable that it could result in a death sentence.
You grab your rosary and you rock back and forth, praying and asking for forgiveness for ever dreaming about him. Your parents always told you that you wouldn’t have a good spot in the afterlife—a place called hell—if you thought of or committed any acts of sin. Especially anything and everything related to dirty inappropriate thoughts or worse, sex. Commit any of these before marriage, and you have a spot ready for you down below.
You feared for your life, even though it was impossible for anyone you love to know. They won’t ever know you have thoughts about John, or how you feel warmth between your legs when you picture him touching you in places you can’t please. Or how you picture him shirtless chopping wood, grabbing your waist from behind as he helps you hold the axe properly and swing it down. It was oh so shameful of you. Dirty, bad, sinful.
But you feel as if enough was enough, you’ve been good for far too long, that you deserve to feel good about yourself for once.
It was the perfect time, six thirty in the morning and both your parents were sleeping away, not knowing their good and obedient daughter was yearning to touch herself.
You lock your doors for safety as you scurried back to bed, you lay down on your back as you skim your fingers down your chest.
Deep breathes in and deep breathes out. You don’t know how to do this, but you’ll give in anyway. You sigh as you pull your shorts down, with your underwear as well. You drew circles around your belly before trailing down to your heat. Soft gasps escaped your mouth at your sensitive touch. Sensitive and swollen from the dream you just had.
You close your eyes, rubbing circular motions on your most sensitive area as you picture John doing this for you instead. Rough and hard-working hands aiding you. A coil in your stomach tightens, urging you to untie right then and there, but you can’t get the motions to stay the same.
You winced as you pushed your finger deeper, your back arching in response. You don’t feel anything, no pleasure, only pain and emptiness.
You want to scream in the agonizing torture of being so close yet so far away. You pull your shorts back up as you go inside the restroom to wash your hands.
You committed acts of sin and weren't pleased, and now you feel nothing but guilt and insecurity of not knowing how to do something right.
The next day, the same place you were before. Outside on your dad's truck watching his friends help out with work. John wore a tight brown tee that accentuated his muscles, he's a retired man, but you could see every ounce of blood, sweat, and tears in that body of his.
You blush, thinking about it. About what could be hiding under his shirt.
He catches you eyeing him but you quickly divert your eyes back to your book. John smirked, telling your dad he'll be back in a second and wants to talk with you.
"Ya watchin' me, sweetheart?" He smiled, taking a cigarette out of his pocket. You watched as he did so, fearing that he'd ask you to take a puff, though you never would. "I...I was just trying to learn how you chop your wood, sir."
A deep chuckle escapes his mouth, "Y'know I can teach you, doll," the new nickname had you unable to face him, but he loved seeing you flustered. He took a puff and you nodded, "Come on over to my place, your dad won't mind. I'm not at home much, anyway. S'good to learn y'know," he went on as he walked closer to you, his southern accent becomes deeper as he goes, "You'll have the privacy that you need, to read your books and pray." He knew how religious you are, heck, he's a good friend to your parents.
"I don't know if my father will let me go, with a man nonetheless." John looks back and then back to you, "It's only me, angel."
You decide to ask your father, just in case. You don't want to go behind his back, even if John is family. You walk on over, building the courage to ask your father if it's okay to go over to a man's house, a man you yearn for.
"Dad, is it okay If John takes me to his house? He's gonna teach me how to chop wood." Your dad looks at you momentarily, before speaking, "Of course honey, just because I want you to help an old man out here and there. 'Aka' me." You tried to keep your cool, to not look so eager about going over a man's house.
John smiled, the thought of having you all to himself at his place gets him straining against his jeans. He loves it when you eye him as if he doesn't know or sense when you drool over him.
--
"Here's your room, sweet thing, if ya ever need anything I'm just a shout away." He sets his tools down and walks to the kitchen, his jeans shaping his toned legs and shirt sizes too small. Butterflies invade your stomach, merely at the thought that you'd be sleeping under the same roof as this man, and willing to teach you something you're so interested in.
"Can't believe your dress is that short, doll. Your mother let you out like that?" He eyed your white dress that sits just above your knees and shows more skin than the dresses you usually wear. "You know, Mr. Price, I'm an adult now."
"Course you are," he takes a sip of his beer, "but I ain't take you as the one to dress like this. Can't say I don't like it."
You smile, flustered at the way he just complimented you. You can't deny that you like it, you love it. It sent a rush of arousal through your entire body, and he noticed the way you crossed your legs.
"Damnit,"
"What is it?" You asked curiously, not knowing that John saw the way you squeezed your thighs together. He wants to ease the need and desire that coursed through you, but he doesn't want to screw it all up.
"Nothin', now come on outside."
--
"Now, you're going to hold it just like this," he instructs, pushing his hard body against your back as he holds your arms. You could feel the hardness of his strain on your back and you scream internally, unable to form coherent thoughts.
You made this so hard for him, so difficult to the point where John himself forgot what he wanted to teach you.
"Easy," his calloused hands left your arms and snaked their way along your waist. Your stomach flipped at the action. Goosebumps flare over your entire skin, his manly scent entering your nose and taking over your mind. You swallowed, and continued.
"Now raise your axe, and swing it down."
You did just so, and you successfully chopped the wood.
"That's it, angel baby, look at ya. Such a good learner."
"I am, aren't I?" You slightly bit your lip, John cursed himself and cupped your face. "Mm, damn right you are." John wondered deeply if you were such a good learner in other parts as well. Price cupping your face was a first, but his calloused hands that signal just how much of a hard worker made the intense throb between your legs grow.
--
You wake up with your blanket suffocating as you struggle to fall asleep, again. You tossed and turned, repeating everything and every touch he gave you. You try to stop the need and the burn in your belly, you really do, but it's hard when you don't know how to fulfill your need. It became so bad to the point where you stood up and walked to the kitchen for water.
He wasn't in his room, he was out for the morning. A busy man and you're so silly for thinking he'd be home, even when he informed you he wouldn't be home every passing hour.
But oh how much you needed him. In ways, you couldn't forgive yourself for it.
You sit down, as quiet as a mouse, waiting patiently for him to come back just so you can confess your dirty sins. Maybe he'll forgive you for them, or maybe he won't show you mercy.
You try to occupy yourself, laying down on the couch and turning on the TV, still in your nightgown. You pull the blanket over, ready to watch a cooking video to learn a few things.
But it hits you that you're actually able to do something about the heat in between your legs, now that nobody is here. The house was quiet except for the TV playing.
Your hand trails under the blanket, lifting your nightgown as you reach for your soaked underwear. Shameful how you're soaked even when he's not around, John really leaves his mark on you. You let out a sigh as you reached your wet and sensitive clit.
It's not easy when you struggle to please yourself, it's so disappointing, honestly. Today was no different.
There is this creeping guilt, but it always hits you the most just when you creep up the tip of the mountain, only for you to fall off when you realize what you're doing.
You can't stop thinking of him, shoulders aching and tears urging to escape when you're so close to reaching the end, only for it to be unsuccessful.
So, you close your eyes and let out a deep breath. Spreading your legs further as your fingers plunged into your aching hole, you gasped. Picturing yet again, how he pleases his women. Of course, he knew how, he is well experienced and capable of pleasing a woman, to the point where she forgets her own name.
You're committing acts of sins in his own home, unforgivable and dirty. Because you were raised with the idea of being perfect, but no one is perfect. From the moment you're born and the moment you die--but the moment you die is the moment John Price fulfills your dirty little dreams.
He whispers in your ear telling you how to do this and how to do that.
'Just like that.'
'Those fingers are too light, darlin', lemme do all the work."
"Attagirl, in and out."
And you almost reached the top of the mountain, whispering finally as sweat buds trail down your forehead.
Finally, finally, finally.
Until you fell down the mountain you tried so hard climbing, when John swings open the door to the sight of his best friend's daughter getting off on his couch. You hurriedly pull your panties back up.
At that moment, you wanted to scream.
To run away.
To die.
He's going to tell your dad, and your entire body freezes. You can't plead for forgiveness when you're so far gone. No mercy will be shown when he kicks you out and tells your parents how bad their daughter truly is.
You sit straight as your body shakes in fear, you're unable to cry when you know your fate.
A sinful girl.
"John," you choke, "I-I am so so sorry, I didn't mean to. I really wasn't-"
"How long have you been at this?" Your heart drops all the way down as the blood from your face drains. "O..only," you struggle to speak as his deep brown eyes gaze at you, "It was only this one time."
You lied.
Another sin.
He stands in silence, shutting the door behind him as he takes big steps towards you. He hovers over you, looking down to see a dirty girl in front of him. As if you played this innocent and sweet girl, though you were, except in John's eyes you weren't. At least that's what you thought.
He takes your chin and pushes your head up to face him, you weren't able to look in his eyes, it was all too much.
"Look at me," he grumbled, you did just what he said. Not once resisting, although it was difficult.
"I ain't mad at ya, it's natural, honey."
Your eyes widened and your shoulders relaxed from the tension and fear.
"You're not going to tell on me?" You asked, Price chuckles.
"Course I'm not, I ain't no snitch, I'm a grown man." He bends on his knees, his thumbs rubbing circular motions on your exposed skin.
"Did it feel good? Sorry to have ruined it for ya' angel." It sure did feel good knowing you almost reached the top, it really did, but it felt better having John assuring you that it was all okay. "You don't have to be sorry--I was just..."
"Go on."
"Continue what I interrupted, don't let my presence stop ya," he signaled his pointer finger toward the door to his room, "it ain't comfortable here. No space to spread those sweet legs, is there?"
You shake your head, "Go on, unless you want me in there. I know deep down you do, doll, you can feel so much better." He's right, the moment you've been dreaming of, it finally comes true. How could you say no to John being in the same room making you feel good?
You almost can't believe it.
He suddenly picks you up from the couch, initiating a soft gasp from you when he opens the door and throws you on his mattress.
You balance yourself with your two hands when he undresses himself in front of you. Starting off with his shirt. You gasp once again, at the sight of his sculpted body before you. His chest was full of hair and his toned dad bod was the definition of perfect.
He gets on the bed and slowly crawls towards you, his head now in between your thighs. "I interrupted your time of need, sweet girl, let me make it up to you." He smiles before hooking his finger on the hem of your underwear, pulling them down all the way to your ankles. On display right before him, so shy you hid away, unable to look at the lewd sight in front of you. "That ain't gonna work for me, eyes over here." His fingers dug into your thighs, you did just as he said, looking at his eyes that continue to look at your pretty pussy.
"S'fuckin' wet."
It's a dream come true for John as well, to see you all wide open and soaking wet for him.
He places peppered kisses along your thighs, and you whimper as he stops. John makes his way up to your lips, biting your bottom lip before kissing you deeply and hungrily. Exactly like the dreams.
His stache brushing against your top lip only made it feel real, his tongue deep inside your mouth as your hands held the back of his head, pushing his mouth impossibly deeper. He's eating your face as if it were his last meal on death row. Like a predator catching his prey.
He pulls away from the intense kiss, the saliva leaving both of you.
Good God did he know how to kiss, you let him do all the work when you could barely kiss him back just as good.
His chest heaved, and he continued with his kisses on your neck and down your collarbone, pushing a soft moan out of you that drove John over the wall. "Make more noises, it's only the two of us, jus' let me hear ya." He cooed, his hands lifting your nightgown over your hips and then over your head. His eyes trailed over your breasts hidden in your bra. "Ah fuck," you sit up, allowing John to unclip your bra, the sight of your chest out on display for him made his mouth water. He grips your left breast with one hand while he sucks and kisses the other.
"Oh, John...keep doing that, please."
He kneads your breast, almost putting you to sleep with how good it feels, "mmmhm," you sighed, "you been wantin' this, and I'm sorry for waiting this long." He apologizes as he places kisses down your belly and finally makes his way back to being in between your thighs.
"No need...to be sorry," you breathe, tilting your head back when he swipes his tongue between your wet folds. The new feeling alone made your legs tremble, enticing a loud gasp from you. You start to rock your hips against his mouth as his deep groans vibrate through your entire nervous system. "Taste like fuckin' Heaven, oh sweet baby, I think you are heaven itself." Praise that had you dropping your jaw as he inserted his hot tongue in your hole.
You swore you saw Heaven.
Brows furrowed and back arched as he eats you like a hungry man, your hands gripping the sheets underneath you, and your legs spread further open inviting him in for more.
John inserts one finger in as his tongue continues to suck on your most sensitive area, and you let out the loudest moan you didn't think you were capable of ever making.
You died in this moment. And John swore he died in that moment, also.
"John," you pant, focusing on what could be your first-ever orgasm.
"I know, you're close baby, s'fuckin' tight, come for me." His words of encouragement suddenly break the coil inside your burning belly, the liquid seeping out of you as he continues to lick away every last bit from you.
He takes his finger and licks you away, which leaves you half-lidded.
"See? How hard was that? Like rippin' a damn bandaid off, does your wound feel better?" He teased, "It does," you say softly, still reminiscing what happened a few seconds ago. What you just felt, how it felt like fireworks exploding inside your veins.
"Such a perfect pussy, waiting to be full of me." He unbuckles his belt and unbuttons his jeans, you've never had sex, but you definitely never needed something more than now. You need him, to get to know him, even when you already do.
"Does it hurt like they say?" You asked nervously, watching as his jeans disappeared, leaving him only in his boxers. His thick thighs didn't do much justice in the dim light.
"When I do it, then it shouldn't be as bad, doll. Jus' a little pain, but if ya feel like it's too much, you jus' tell me. Hm?"
It makes you feel special with how sweet he treats you, he treats you with such care that it truly makes you dizzy.
He takes off his boxers and you almost lose all consciousness, his cock leaking with pre-cum and hard, you thought it was quite inhumane how big he is.
Sure you've explored your curiosity, but John, he differed from all of them.
"Poor thing needs some love and I'm going to show your pussy what the definition of love is." You grew heavy with desire, "ya need me to use a condom, sweetheart?" he asked, you nodded, simply because you weren't on the pill.
He opens his drawer and pulls out a condom, ripping it off with his teeth and spitting a piece of the wrapper out.
That was a sight for sore eyes.
He slips it on his thick cock, the condom intensifying every vien, it left your mouth dry like a Sahara desert.
How was that going to fit? Was all you were thinking about, but you were so sure he was going to make it feel okay.
He sets his heavy cock on your soaking entrance, teasing you while he moves his dick up and down your folds, you whine with need and John chuckles.
Was this the sinful thing that would literally damn you for eternity? How could something so dirty feel so good?
He brings a hand of his to pin your arms down, while the other holds your leg close to him. Your brows furrow as he slowly enters himself into you. John grows concerned when he sees your lips pursed and your eyes shut tightly, a tear escaping.
He stops, and you stop holding your breath.
"It hurts don't it? Want me to stop?"
"Please, no," you gasp, "I...I want you to keep going."
He readjusts your hips, before proceeding to continue, "You sure, honey?" You nod and whisper a hundred times yes before he thrusts deep inside of you.
"So fuckin' good for me, fuck!" he shouts, he loved the way your cunt fluttered and wrapped tightly around his cock.
The silence in the room was filled with his groans and loud moans from you, so lewd and so dirty. But you're too far deep to leave now, you're ready to die, happily.
"My," he thrusts, then pulling away and thrusting back in deeper, "gorgeous," you gasp when he continues his rhythm of thrusting and being so close to pulling out before he thrusts impossibly deeper again, "Girl." He breathed.
He brings his fingers to circle your sensitive clit, and you feel it happening again. It's more intense and heavier.
Your walls wrapped tightly on his cock, initiating that you're indeed closer than you have ever been before. "Mhmm," he moaned, and it was such a sweet sound you so badly wanted to hear again. He grabs hold of your legs, bringing them closer to your head, thrusting at a deeper angle that you can feel in your throat.
"That's it, baby, that's my fuckin' girl right here. All mine, gimme one more." He stopped as you cried out his name over and over until it became engraved in John's brain. He silences your cries with his lips as your legs shake around him.
"You did so well for me, your pussy jus' needed some medicine to be cured, got you coming all over my cock." He begins to move again, to finish himself this time. Your pain turns into pleasure and familiarity when he pushes himself in and out.
"John, that feels so..." He groans loudly at the way you watch his cock slide in and out, it was obscene but also surreal, "look at you, fuck, gonna make me cum just lookin' at me like that."
Which you felt so good about, it's all you wanted.
He pants as he reached a certain point, chest heaving as you can feel his cock twitching inside of you.
John pulls out, and there's sadness in your heart at the emptiness. Your heart thuds loudly that your first time to be with a man you dreamed about, it feels euphoric. You felt ecstatic.
He wipes away your dry tears and your hair away from your face, that drowned in sweat and tears.
John admired you the second he laid his eyes on you till now, he never knew the definition of perfect until this moment.
"Can you teach me how to feel good?" You asked as your hand roamed his broad shoulders and his back. And fuck, did John love that.
"Course' baby, on top of the choppin' the damn wood lessons," you both laugh, "I got all the time in the world, for you."
Your heart ached, he whispered sweet nothings before he carried you into the bathroom to clean up the mess.
Then you nestled under his arms and his body heat, his chest, and arms hugging you as the two of you slept the day away.
It was worth every waking second, and now you can sleep peacefully.
--
A/N: Y'all, wtf. Gnawing at the bars of my enclosure. Need him.
This lowkey needs to be edited some more now that I’m reading it, but I’ll definitely do that later…
533 notes · View notes
aothotties · 3 months
Text
Sneaky Link w/ Onyankopon
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Warnings: MDNI, Public sex, mirror sex, multiple orgasms, squirting.
Wprd Count: 822
_______
Ony has played soccer for as long as he could remember. Soccer is his safe haven, it’s how he met his teammates and best friends.
It’s also how he met you, his pretty little thing. 
One day during his off season you came to one of their practices with your cousin, Connie’s sister. Onyakopon immediately caught your attention and once you set your eye on something you always seem to get it. 
“Ay Connie!” You call your cousin over and lean against the railing to talk to him.
“Introduce me to your friend over there.” You smile as you lock eyes with the man in question.
“Absolutely not, try again.” He says and you roll your eyes. 
“I’ll give you the information to the girl who does my tattoos damn!” You cross your arms over your chest and he smiles proudly. 
“He’ll be over at the end of practice, thank you prima!” He skips off like the dumb ass he is and you sit back on the bleachers.
And he was right, by the end of the game Ony came up to you and introduced himself to you, lord his smile could light up a damn room. 
“So you’re Connie’s cousin? Are you here to stay or just visiting?” He asks before taking a drink of water.
“I’m visiting for a few weeks, I’m flying back home in a month.” You stand closer to him and he nods his head.
“You should come to this kickback tonight, me and the boys will be there.” He takes your phone and puts his information in it. 
You make sure to graze your fingers over his as you take it back from him with a smile.
“As long as you’re there, then I’m there.” You kiss his cheek and walk off. 
You catch him at the party later that night and can’t help but bite your lip at the sight of him in something beside his uniform.
“Aren’t you stylish? He chuckles and shrugs his shoulders slyly.
“What can I say, I’m smooth on and off the field.” He leans against a counter and sips his drink.
“Is that so?” You tilt your head and he raises an eyebrow in return.
“You want to find out?”
That’s the last thing you remember before you ended up where you are currently. His large hand slapped over your mouth as you cream sll over his thich shaft.
“P-papa, you feel so good!” You moan out into the bathroom you both ran into.
“I know baby girl, you take me so good.” He smooths his hand up your back and into your hair, grabbing it in his hand. You come around him without a warning at the feelings of his hand in your hair.
“Shit girl! I got you cumming like that?” He grins, you whimper and nod in response. He grabs your hips and pounds into your pussy faster.
Wet squelching noises fill up the bathroom, if the music were to shut off you two would be so screwed. That’s the last thing on y’alls mind as Ony’s thick tip nudges your g-spot. 
“Look at you, such a nasty fucking slut.” He forces you to watch him fuck you in the mirror, you clench around him tightly and grip the counter.
“Y-yes, ‘m so nasty papi!” Your eyes roll to the back of your head in ecstasy, his big ball slap against your clit.
Your orgasm sneaks up on you again and you bite your fist as another orgasm rips through you. You whine as his hips never lose speed and continue tapping your g-spot. 
“I want you to squirt for me, we’re not leaving until you do.” He slowly trails a hand to your clit and you squeeze your eyes shut at the command.
“O-ony I c-can’t.” You bite down on you lip at the mixture of pain and pleasure you’re feeling. 
You swear you can feel him tapping your cervix, but you only want him to go further. You’re up on your tip toes as he continues drilling in and out of you, loving the mess you make on his pelvis and thighs.
“We gotta make this month worth your stay mami.” He leans down and whispers in your ear, locking eyes with you in the mirror.
He bites down on your neck and at that same moment you squeeze around his cock for the final time and come hard. You scream into your hand as you release splashes against his thighs and the floor.
“Oh fuck.” He groans loudly. Pulling out quickly before stroking himself and finishing on your lower back.
“Damn baby, what can I do to get you to stay here forever?” He asks, somewhat playfully but also in all seriousness. 
You chuckle at the question and he begins to clean you up with some toilet paper nearby.
“You keep fucking me like that and I’ll take it into consideration.” 
“Deal.”
Ari
536 notes · View notes
charlottesuzee · 2 years
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Telling Him "Wake Up, My Boyfriend's Here !" (One Piece Men x GN!Black Reader)
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Monkey D Luffy
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- "Ay, Luffy, wake up, you gotta go !"
- "Wha... Why ?"
- "You gotta leave the room, my boyfriend's here ! He'll kill you if he sees you !"
- "Let him come, I'll kick his ass !"
- And he really gets up, ready to fight someone before he finally connects the dots
- "Wait a minute... I'm your boyfriend ! .... I am your boyfriend... right ?"
Roronoa Zoro
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- It takes a minute to wake him up
- "Zoro,I'm serious, wake up, you gotta go."
- "What the fuck are you talking about ?"
- "My boyfriend is coming, he'll kick your ass if he catches another man in our bed, you have to go !"
- Will deadass, get up, half asleep and start putting his clothes on before he finally puts the pieces together.
- "Oh, fuck you, you ruined my nap !"
Blackleg Sanji
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- "Sanji, you have to leave !"
- "Huh, why, what's wrong ?!?"
- Because you woke him up with such urgency, he shoots up, looking for danger
- "My boyfriend will literally kill me if he sees another man in our bed, you have to go !"
- "I'll be damned if a man lays his hands on you let me-!" He then pauses. "Sweetness... I'm your boyfriend." He then starts sobbing "I am your boyfriend, right ?!? You haven't been using me to two time with someone else right ?!?"
- You'll have to comfort him as punishment for your mean prank.
Charlotte Katakuri
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- Will deadass sit up from his slumber and look at you before you do it
- "Don't even think about it. Go back to bed." He says before going back to sleep, causing you to pout, because you didn't even get to say anything yet.
- It's hard to pull pranks on a boyfriend that can see into the future, even in his sleep.
Eustass Kid
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- "Kid, wake up, my boyfriends is here, you have to go !"
- "Let him come, I'll kill him" He doesn't even process what you said, he just yawns, rolls over and goes back to sleep as if he didn't even hear anything. It's hard to get Kid to wake up from a slumber.
Killer
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- "Kill, wake up !"
- "Huh ? Wass wrong ?" His speech is a little slurred when waking up
- "My boyfriend is coming, you have to leave !"
- Will just stare at you for the longest amount of time, there's a flaw in your sentence but his sleepy brain can't process it fast enough to figure it out, until he does.
"You fuckin play too much, do that shit again and I'm kicking you out of our bed." And will roll back over and go back to sleep without another word.
- He's still mad about it after he wakes up and gives you the silent treatment for about an hour.
Law
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- "Law, wake up !"
- "You better have a good reason for waking me up or I swear to God-"
- "This is a good reason, my boyfriend is coming down the hall, you have to go before he catches us !"
- Law's still pretty sharp, even when he's half asleep, so he immediately catches the flaw in your sentence. He will give you the "bitch really ?" look, before using his devil fruit to transport you out of the bed and outside of your room, before locking the door on you.
- He's that petty about losing what little sleep he gets.
- "Law, let me in ! I'm sorry ! I won't do it again !"
- "I'll open the door when I wake up from my nap ! That'll teach you not to be a dumbass !" And will use his devil fruit to created a barrier around himself to drown out your knocking and yelling, going back to sleep, hugging your pillow close to him.
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