#'a fat guy was made more fat for a movie while also being very insistent about not turning it into a joke'

[killbaned]

my hot take of the night is that considering he’s already fat to begin w and how many years he’s been the brunt of absolutely vile comments and fatphobia about how he’s ‘not hot’ anymore br*ndan fr*iser can wear as many fat suits as he wants

[babymetaldoll]

Quarantine with Matthew Gray Gubler (MGG / Reader)

(Not my gif, thank you to whoever made it! )

Requested: Yes :)

Vivir en cuarentena con Matthew, y él hace en vivos por Instagram con y/n respondiendo preguntas de fans

Category: Fluff

Pairing: Matthew Gray Gubler / Reader

Summary: Matthew loves making people happy, and in quarantine, he finds the best way to keep in touch with his fans and do what he loves the most: spend time with (Y/N) 💜

Warnings: Nope

Word count: 2,2K

Masterlist

A/N: I am so sorry this request took me forever!!  Hello guys!!  thank you for all your comments, and love 💖 You are awesome!! hope you have a great week!!

.

Living in quarantine isn't as bad as many people think. It all depends on who you are spending your time locked in with. (Y/N) knew it pretty well, 'cos she had been locked with her husband, Matthew Gray Gubler, in their shared house for the last month.

And even when most people were sick and tired of being home, (Y/N)and Matthew managed to keep themselves busy and mentally sane. In fact, you could feel more stressed considering there was a pandemic and no one could see their loved ones and friends. But being with Matthew made it all so much bearable.

Considering Gubler's job kept him busy most of the time during a normal year and that he didn't have many chances to be home the way he was now, he enjoyed it.

Sleeping in was heaven. And the fact he could stay in, wearing pajama and kimonos, just enjoying his wife's company, was what he needed.

He didn't realize he needed to take a break after years of hard work until he was forced to do it. And god, it felt good.

(Y/N) would keep herself busy writing and reading while Matthew painted and draw by her side.

Their daily activities included: trying new recipes at least three times each week. Gubler would always come with some random exotic dish he always wanted to recreate. And six of eight times, he nailed it.

They would also spend a day in their pajamas doing nothing. Usually, it was Sundays. That was their official cuddles day. Just movies, ice cream, and cuddles.

Matthew also started teaching (Y/N) some magic tricks. She had insisted a few times, but he was very reluctant to do it at first.

- "A magician never shares his tricks, Bunny"- he argued for days.

- "Ok, but what if I am a magician too? Then it would be ok?"

(Y/N) was sitting on his lap, playing with some curls of his hair between her fingers. They were in their backyard, having a picnic. They had set a blanket and had some cookies (Y/N) had baked, along with two tall ice coffee Matthew had prepared, with an obscene amount of whipped cream.

- "And how are you planning to be a magician if you don't know any trick?"- he questioned, raising an eyebrow.

- "Just because you haven't taught me any trick doesn't mean I don't know any!"- she answered, pretending to be insulted.

- "My wife can do magic, and she never told me?"

- "There are a lot of things about your wife you still don't know"- (Y/N) teased and smiled at him.

- "Bunny, we are locked in this house until further notice. I think I have enough time to find out all those things I haven't seen in the last years."

(Y/N) had finally convinced him when she showed him a simple card trick her father had taught her when she was a kid. Gubler got so excited he even presided a ceremony to name her an official magician and invited their friends to be part of it via zoom. Everybody enjoyed their magic tricks and shared a good hour of fun and laughter with them, just like they would do live.

It felt good to be with their loved ones, even if it was just online.

That gave Matthew an idea.

- "Hey, Bunny!"- he walked into the kitchen holding his phone, scrolling down his Instagram feed.

- "What is it, honey?"- (Y/N) asked him as she kept chopping vegetables for dinner.

- "I was thinking maybe I should start doing Instagram live streamings with the fans. Maybe do some magic tricks, tell jokes. I don't know."- (Y/N) raised his eyes from the food and smiled.

- "Sounds awesome! when do you wanna start?"

- "Now?"- he answered a little hesitant

- "And what do you have in mind?"

- "Maybe answering questions and asking them if hanging out via Instagram is something they'd like to do."

(Y/N) chuckled and walked to her husband, pinching his cheeks, making him giggle.

- "You are so adorable, Gub. Like anyone wouldn't love to hang out with you."- he blushed and shook his head.

- "Ok, I'm gonna do it here anyway."

- "While I'm cooking?"- (Y/N) looked confused

- "Yes, I want you near so you can stop me when I start rambling"- (Y/N) laughed and kissed her husband's lips sweetly.

- "I can't stop your rambling, Gubler. But I can mute the video"- she teased, and he pecked her lips, chuckling.

- "Just stop me when I start saying anything embarrassing."

- "Deal."

No one could say Matthew Gray Gubler didn't care about his fans. He was committed to being always nice to anyone who would ask for a picture or an autograph. Why? Because nothing made him happier than making people happy. And if his job gave people joy, he honestly felt his life had a purpose.

That's why he enjoyed his improvised IG stream so much. He just sat on a couch nearby the kitchen and started talking with fans, answering questions.

- "Where am I spending my quarantine? Here is my hunted treehouse. I don't think I had ever been home this much, and it's been awesome."- Gubler stood up and started walking around the room.

- "Who am I spending it with? my gorgeous wife, of course,"- he said and pointed the phone at (Y/N), who was still cooking dinner. She simply waved and smiled

- "She is making sure I eat proper food now... Bunny, people are asking what you are cooking."

- "Pad thai"- she answered with a huge grin- "Gubler's request for tonight's dinner."

- "Maybe we could make a cooking class one day,"- Matthew suggested, and the screen started filling with "YES!!" immediately- "I could teach people how to burn every pan in the house, and you can cook."

(Y/N) nodded, laughing.

- "You can teach everybody how to make the best hotcakes."- (Y/N) answered and walked away from the phone.

It wasn't that she didn't like being part of her husband's activities, but she figured she wasn't really that important. Fans were there to see him, not her.

But Matthew followed her.

- "Yeah! I'll make my famous chocolate chip hotcakes, and you will have to top them!"- (Y/N) laughed and looked at her husband, raising an eyebrow.

- "Battle of the hotcakes?"

- "Yes!"

- "Set a time and a place, and I'll be there"- (Y/N) put her hands in her waist and raised an eyebrow, looking as serious as she could fake it.

- "Tomorrow, noon, here in our kitchen, because we can't leave the house,"- Gubler answered and mimicked his wife's attitude, still streaming everything.

- "Bring it, Gub."

And just like that, another livestream was scheduled.

The next day, at noon, Matthew streamed the funniest hotcake competition there had ever been seen by humankind. At least that's what he described.

- "Let's say it's a tie"- Gubbler decided and finished the last piece of hotcake in his dish- "I'll leave a poll in my stories so you can decide what you wanna see in tomorrow's live."

- "Really?"- (Y/N) asked, surprised- "Which are the options?"

- "Magic tricks or... I don't know. I didn't think this through"- he answered, making his wife giggle.

- "Maybe you could make a Rumple reading"- and Gubler's eye brightened at the idea

- "With my Rumple costume?"

- "I don't see why not"- Gubler looked at the screen and grinned like a kid.

- "Ok, you'll decide, magic classes or Rumple reading."

It was a draw. That's why Gubler did a Rumple reading the next day and decided to prepare a magic class with his wife for later that week.

His followers were having a blast with each one of their streams. Matthew would always try to take a step back and let his wife shine in front of everybody. He thought she was so funny the world needed to see more of her.

And (Y/N) always tried to be the best sidekick for her husband. Helping him make his streamings as fun as possible.

For the Rumple reading, Matthew sat in an armchair by the fireplace, dressed like Rumple, and read the whole book, impersonating voices and everything. Then, (Y/N) read the questions from the fans, and Matthew answered everything.

Gubler dressed like a classic magician for their magic streaming, and his wife was his assistant, helping him with each trick.

And by the end of the week, the people picked Q&A streaming with the two of them. It was the Friday "Chilling with the Gubs special."

- "Your girl is about to steal the whole show"- Shemar called Matthew that week and made him laugh- "She's the best part of the whole stream."

- "Don't flirt with my wife!"- he answered and chuckled.

- "I'm just saying she has a lot of potentials. She should try to do some stand-up comedy."

Gubler loved that comment, though. He knew his wife was awesome, and he wanted the world to know. As simple as that.

- "Ok, Bunny, ready to answer some questions?"- Gubler set the phone in front of them as they sat in their backyard. One more time, they had set a blanket in their favorite spot. And they had cookies and coffee.

- "Hit it!"

It was fun to do those things together. (Y/N) had never been one to be in the spotlight, but she loved being with Matthew. And if he was happy, so was she.

And it took only a second to see how happy Matthew was. He beamed each time he looked at his wife by his side.

- "Ok, this is a good one. What did we have for breakfast today?"- (Y/N) read and chuckled.

- "Good question. Waffles. (Y/N) made waffles, and I ate five, with ice cream. I'm gonna get so fat in quarantine"- the actor answered and felt his wife's hand in his hair.

- "What's your next project"- (Y/N) read- "Oh! that's a good one!"

- "But I won't say anything about it,"- Gubler answered and chuckled- "You'll have to stay tuned."

- "But I can assure you, it's amazing,"- (Y/N) added smiling- "How did you two meet"- the couple looked at each other and giggled.

- "At a party in my best friend's house"- she answered- "She was dating one of Matthew's friends, and they had a huge celebration when they moved in together."

- "And when I saw her, I knew I had to talk to her, but her friends didn't leave her alone."

- "Why didn't you just walked over and talked to me anyway?"- (Y/N) asked and crossed her arms on her chest

- "Because they were intimidating! and I am a shy guy!"- he explained- "I had to wait until you walked away to get yourself a drink to talk to you finally!"

- "You literally appeared by my side as soon as I walked away from them"- (Y/N) laughed, remembering the moment- "It was so funny!"

- "Hey! it might have been my only chance! I needed to take it!"- Matthew held her hand and played with her fingers, thinking he was glad non of that was in the camera angle.

- "And it worked"- (Y/N) answered and smiled at her husband, thinking as soon as that livestream was over, she was going to have a serious make out session with him

- "I'm glad it did. Quarantine would suck without you."

Gubler answered and smiled, thinking as soon as that stream was over, he was going to jump on her and kiss every inch of her body, just because she looked so beautiful that day.

- "Are you guys planning on having kids?"- (Y/N) read and turned all kinds of pink. There was a silence between the couple as they just looked at each other and shrugged.

- "We'd make cute babies"- Matthew answered- "And we could clearly keep them entertained."

(Y/N) laughed and shook her head.

- "We are not streaming that!!"

- "What?"

- "The baby-making part!"- she joked, and Gubler blushed, laughing and falling back on the blanket.

- "That idea never crossed my mind!"

- "I had to say it! Just in case"- (Y/N) argued and chuckled.

She had thought about having babies in the last few months. But getting pregnant during a pandemic didn't sound like a good idea.

Or was it?

- "Ok, everybody. We are signing out for today"- Gubler announced and waved at the camera- "Take care, stay in your house this weekend, and we'll come back maybe next week."

- "Maybe people can suggest what they'd like to see"- (Y/N) said and looked at Gubler, smiling back at her.

- "I'll leave the option in one of my stories so that you can leave your suggestions. See you!!"

The livestream was over. Gubler left his phone aside and looked at his wife. She was sipping her coffee and fidgeting with her fingers on the fabric of her jeans.

- "We would make cute babies, though,"- Matthew whispered and watched her beam at those words. That was all he needed to know.

- "You would spoil them so much"- (Y/N) replied, giggling.

- "Only because they will be just like you, and I love to spoil you so much"- he opened his arms, and (Y/N) leaned in, resting her body against his.

- "So... do you wanna have a baby Gub?"- she whispered against his chest- her voice was muffled, but he heard her clearly.

- "I think I do. You?"- Gubler answered, feeling his heart beating faster.

- "Me too."

(Y/N) muttered and giggled. Matthew looked at her and leaned in a little closer, kissing her lips sweetly.

It was a massive step for them, and they were very excited to do it.

- "Do you wanna start now?"- Matthew suggested, and (Y/N) blushed immediately- "I mean... I was going to suggest sex before, but now..."

- "The sooner, the better, Gubler,"- (Y/N) replied and bit her lips- "After all, we are gonna have to do a lot of practice before we succeed."

[genesisrose74]

Christmas With the Karasuno Boys (HC’s)!!

Part 2: Kageyama, Hinata, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, Kinoshita, & Narita

Part 1 (Daichi, Suga, Asahi, Nishinoya, Tanaka, & Ennoshita) here!

A/n: Tumblr said my word count was too much so I’m splitting this bad boi up into two parts :p Enjoy!!

*****

Kageyama

This boy has a secret soft side for Christmas istg

He HATES showing it to other people on his team and shit

But holy bejeezus he is mesmerized by the holiday in every way possible

Lights, sweets, snow, just like,,, the general magic of December is the most awe-inspiring thing to him

Since he is still a sporty and pretty active mofo, you decided to fuel that on your holiday-themed date as Kags had noted that he’d never gone sledding before

Your jaw was on the FLOOR when he first told you because he would 10000% enjoy the hell out of it

And so you dragged him out to this popular sledding hill that you frequented as a child and taught him what to do

Not gonna lie, he was kind of nervous

“Well you’re experienced at it. I don’t wanna mess up”

🥺🥺🥺 bubby

“You won’t, Tobio! I can already tell you’re gonna be a sledding pro”

Feels a little better after that, but he asks you to help him out for his first run down the hill

He sits behind you with his arms secured snugly around your waist and his head nestled on top of your shoulder

Which would probably seem really funny to passerby because this boy is tol and intimidating in most other situations

As soon as the sled started down, Kags tightened his grip and made this cute little yelp of surprise

But you were laughing insanely hard at the combination of going really fast downhill whilst also having your boyfriend cling to you for dear life

And then when the sled stopped safely at the bottom he started to chuckle

FULL ON, GENUINE SOUND OF ENJOYMENT

That shit is rare

Y’all stayed at that hill for half the day because it was so fun

You got him a new, very high quality athletic roller for Christmas because his old one was just not cutting it anymore

And you also gave him this really cute bracelet with a volleyball, his jersey number, and a little strawberry milk set of charms attached to it

It matched this really pretty and subtle chain he’d bought for your birthday

His blueberry eyes got all wide with affection dfjdskfjsdk—

Got super blushy and couldn’t get a handle on his speech for a fat minute

He thinks you’re the coolest person ever no I do not take criticism

Geez you’re both adorable together, ideal “stoic boy becomes warmer during the holidays around his love” movie plot and I love it

Hinata

He is all in on Christmas. Not a chance this boy doesn’t get excited as hell

Will openly go into holiday mode as soon as November is over

Was secretly already listening to his Christmas playlist before then

He is one of the sweetest gift givers, that is FACTUAL

If you want something really badly, he will take notice and get it as your present immediately

He’ll also gift you an extra thing that’s handmade 🥺

Like some pastries that his mom helped him make, or a specially made basket of soaps with your favorite scents in it

It’s absolutely adorable and you cherish those ones especially

Is happy if you simply get him something; mans doesn’t care what it is

New practice volleyball? A brand new sweatshirt? Elated either way

You had seen an advertisement for a friendly match between Japan and Poland’s men’s volleyball teams, so you waited online on the ticket sales website until the minute it opened

Spoiler alert: you got some banger seats 😌✨

Shoyo may or may not have tackled you when he read the ticket details, letting out his excited giggle (you know the one)

“I can’t believe you got these, angel! You’re coming with me, right? You’ve gotta! Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

Gives you sweet little kisses between each individual ‘thank you’

“Of course I’ll go with you, Sho! I’m really glad you like it!”

He will give you the brightest smile of all time — that shit makes Christmas lights pale in comparison

“Have I told you how much I love you?”

RIGHT BACK AT YOU BBY

Hold his hands to warm up together when temperatures drop pls :)))

It’s become a weekly December tradition to watch a Christmas movie with Natsu at the Hinata household

She’ll sit in your lap while the three of you are cuddled under a blanket together, and Shoyo will lace his fingers with yours all discreetly

In conclusion, I am a sucker for holiday Hinata 🥺🥺🥺

Tsukishima

His room is decorated to the very minimum simply because his mom and brother had insisted on him being festive

You know those holiday instrumentals that are really calming and jazzy and stuff? Yeah, that’s the only Christmas music he will tolerate in his house

While he’s still got his usual icy demeanor, this blond bitch does get slightly less snippy with the Karasuno boys

Is always on the nose with getting you the exact thing you wanted for a present

Like,,, TO THE SMALLEST DETAIL

You don’t even have to bring that shit up beforehand, he just KNOWS

“Tsukki, how did you—?”

“It’s pretty obvious, with the way that one ad kept showing up on your phone.”

b r u h

How does he pay such good attention without even letting on??

As for his own present, you’ll usually get him two: one gag gift and one more serious gift

His dino plush collection size is partly due to the former’s contributions this time of year

Yes the dinos have names

You exchanged gifts on Christmas Eve with all the team (you made him go) and he saved your more serious one for last

It was a scarf that you’d gotten custom made, which had a Spotify code knitted into the fabric

Scanning the code opened the app to a playlist you’d created especially for him

He got pretty quiet when figuring it out and scrolling through the playlist

Would let out a certified Tsukki Nose Exhale™ when he came across certain songs

The more subdued reaction was expected because it’s Tsukishima

His little chuckles and warmer eyes were enough of a giveaway to tell you he very much enjoyed your gift

But on the walk home, he took the scarf and wrapped it around you both, and then brought his arm around your waist

“Thank you.”

You deadass almost combusted because it was so unexpected??

“You’re welcome. Merry Christmas, Kei”

Way to respond calm and collected 😌👍

But on the inside your body was in freak out mode

He wears the scarf all the time jdfsklfjdsk

Yamaguchi

Take the most tooth rotting fluff you could imagine

And then double that and put a fucking cherry on top

That’s the equivalent of what Christmas is like with Yama Yama

Y’all are like kids in a candy store — literally

For your Christmas dates it’s all about sweets and shared giggles, so frequent trips to the candy and baking isles of the grocery store is a must

Making gingerbread houses, peppermint tasting (mostly trying those different and wild ass candy cane flavors), you name it and it’s there

Stomach aches? I don’t know her

Yeah you do but they go away with enough butterfly kisses 🥰

Tadashi is exceptionally good at decorating gingerbread houses for whatever reason

He put a poll on his instagram between yours and his final products and he won by a landslide

It’s not like yours was necessarily bad, more like he’s just an icing master

You also might have eaten too many gumdrops which left your rooftop lacking in ✨spice✨

But it’s okay because Tadashi donated some of his leftovers to you

He’s such a sweetheart uwu

Please for the love of everything get him something heartfelt as his present

You know those long distance bracelets for couples?

Basically if your s/o taps the icon on the bracelet it’ll send a little vibration to the other person’s as a notice that you’re thinking about them

This boy seeks constant reassurance, and you love to give him his deserved love and validation, so it was the perfect present

It takes a second for him to figure out what it is, but after reading the directions and testing it out, the most adorable smile erupted on his face

And then since you already had yours on, he tapped the little icon again with a giggle

“Hey there”

It becomes common habit to tap it at least once every couple hours

GOD HE IS SO CUTE

He is just so soft this time of year, give him all the love and he will return it tenfold ☺️

Kinoshita

This boy is absolutely an awkward cutie and an avid romantic

Give him the cliches and he will eat em up, no doubt

It naturally gets more apparent around the holidays

He’ll take you on pretty winter walks, give you lots of little gifts (while blushing a hell of a lot), and is just a professional at stumbling upon some mistletoe

Wow wonder how it got there, Hisashi

He’s quite a bit more confident when simply alone with you than in a crowded space

And that definitely shows when he takes you out on a secluded sleigh ride around town

Yeah you heard me

A fuckin’ sleigh ride

Horses and blankets and everything

Don’t even ask how he managed to pull it off, because he loves watching the cogs turn in your head and simply will not give you a straight answer

Of course there’s the nice driver guy who’s there, but in the back alone Kinoshita’s confidence goes ���📈

Lots of flirting, tons of skimmed touches and shared giggles throughout the ride

I legitimately simp really hard for him

Anyways it was a gorgeous ride through town and super fun

On Christmas Eve you both exchange gifts together and tbh whatever you got him will leave him happy and flustered regardless

But when he opens the wrapping paper to find an entire set of vintage VHS tapes, he’s stunned

He owns a VHS (actually canon!) and honestly loves it to death, and the fact that you’d get him tapes of pretty high quality for his collection meant a lot

Gosh he’s so underrated but a definite sweetheart, give him all the holiday love

Narita

Another underrated bby 🥺

He’s so chill and is pretty open to anything during the holidays, so long as he gets to spend ample time with you, his friends, and his family

Definitely more of an indoor person despite being accepting of most situations

Hence why you thought a cute little indoor winter picnic would be right up his alley

Which it absolutely was 😌✨ nice work

You’d made plans while in secret communications with his family members about the whole thing

He’d been pretty stressed lately with trying to handle his schoolwork, while also helping out others with theirs

Despite being a wonderful tutor, it was clearly becoming a bit overwhelming as he tried to grapple with so much at once

So when he came home one day to find a pristine house with you settled on a blanket in his living room, he was quite surprised

There’s a cheese plate, soda cans in a cute ice box, sandwiches, snacks, a presparked fireplace — you and his family went all out

Really adorable I cannot lie

“I thought you said you were going gift shopping today?”

“I might have maybe lied :P”

So he gives the sweetest little smile and sits across from you

Y’all stay there and talk for hours

After finally getting through everything previously laid out on the blanket spread, you slid him a little rectangular box that he looked at curiously

“Already? I haven’t wrapped yours yet!”

“Mine can wait a bit! Just open yours”

And so he does, and you watch with a face-splitting grin as he looks down in awe

You got tickets to see his favorite rock band in concert while they were on tour

He sprung onto you and pulled you into the tightest hug ever

“Holy shit you’re the best I love you so much how do you get even more loveable every day—!?!l”

It’s a jumble of words but you’re able to put it together and it makes you giggle

He deadass sprints upstairs to go get your gift and make sure that you feel as equally appreciated as he does

In simple words: wholesome holiday sweetness 🥰

[hamliet]

I’d like to give an explanation for Hawks.

As a child no one aided Hawks. We could argue the commission did , but in the end he not there different from a child solider, the viceversa of Shigaraki: groomed to be an hero. While Hawks could accept this because of his desire to save others, he had little choice in merit.

One of the main narrative I’ve found is that he defined his parents as broken, and he basically put some distance - left them behind - to not be “broken” like them, as to mark an inherent conception of passing down being rotten. My theory is Dabi went there just to film hawks reaction it i hearing his name or the truth. This mean that in his original retoric he also found (or better hori made him say) exactly what Hawks fears: being broken. This also collided with Dabi rethoric : you reap what you sow and you can’t escape from this.

In this chapter Hawks evilly glare at Enji asking about Shoto’s scar. This means while Hawks still has a weak spot for Endeavor , he has started to lose his “idol”. This also bring up another theme similar to Touya: Endeavor “has to be perfect and flawless”. Now hawks is confronting with the reality Enji is extremely far from perfect. However his needs to prove of not being broken, of being useful and in general a good person is starting to falter.

Imo hawks was so (rightly) terrified of being broken and craved for being like Endeavor (flawless and perfect) because he was not for his parents. But Enji was admired , he saved him so... being like him it’s a good thing right? Thought this I think Hawks built a rigid standard of criteria to divide good and bad and to keep on using this values as a moral compass , so that he would always be a good person. If you had the commission way, you’d obtain such a rigidity so hawks is down to do everything to be a “good person”. This is evident when he bow to the commission: he being a good person is even more valuable than his own life and health (a day passed, he’s severely wounded and he had already started to work again).

To me this rigidity is pervasive to anything and matches with the “greater good”: it’s like a chess game and hawks is nothing more than a pawn in his own head, for the greater good, but it is? It’s not changing society , but rather I think it’s to be a good person at core

Part 1

This also matches Dabi: both of them will answer that they do this for something great (stain and heroes vs society sake and greater good) but really, I think that at the base there are their personal issues: being recognised by his father and being a good and useful kid for his mother.

And in fact since his first introduction Hawks always had this type of dichotomy: he’s willing to be stained if it’s for the greater good. And this is contradictory: what is it the great good ? And how can be good if you re stained? And in fact he never accepted such a thing. Yeah we could argue it was the commission , but the reality is that Hawks is not willing to give “his all”: he wasn’t willing to let Dabi attach the city of fukuoka ; he wasn’t willing to kill Jeanist for real. Because if he allows such things he would be a bad person. So greater good is a facade, much like society is Dabi’s facade for craving Enji’s attention (in a pulsion of death style aka the destruction of what it’s loved).

But he met Twice. And twice was the worst to him. Dealing with Dabi is easy: he behaved very evilly, he broke their pact, he asked for someone corpse. So dabi is “evil” and Hawks is “good”. But twice ? He was sweet. Caring. Trusty. Fun. He really felt close to hawks. And once again hawks tries to be a “good person”. But twice is a problem because while he’s a villain (he kills , he steals he kidnaps) but Twice is a good person. I think Hawks never meant to kill him. Instead he was facing a deep crisis: if he left twice alive and he rampaged killing tons of people , hawks would have been a good person? But if he killed a “friend” a nice guy and wonderful friend , someone who welcomed him, would he be a good person? Before dabi arrival I thin hawks was just threatening twice. If he wanted to kill him he could have done sooner.

As fat gum said , there’s only ONE way for an hero to win: no causalties and make the villain lose his will to fight. And this is the route hawks wanted to take : make twice surrender. It was the only way to solve the dilemma : killing twice meant killing a good person. Sparing a villain means to be a bad person. Howeve then Dabi arrived and he posed as a threat. In the first part of the battle hawks saved twice. Meaning that he and twice allign: Dabi is the villain. But this isn’t the case. Exactly because twice is a good person he can’t leave the league. So this is another stall: hawks has to kill twice (he can’t see others right thanks to the commission i think ) but at the same time the reason is the twice is indeed a very good person at his core.

Hawks is capable of incredible speed and cutting power, so I’ve always wonder why he was stalling over twice corpse like that.

There’s a movie , I don’t recall the title, in which a ss soldier asks a Jews teacher to prepare him for an exam in a lager. The teacher knows ethics , philosophy and religion. The teacher takes the occasion to prove the moral law (the universal law inside of any of us to decide if something is right or wrong). The ss answers “you’re are Jews, you are the evil!” But the teacher proves him wrong again and again. Finally the ss pull out a gun but he then is not able to shot. The professor says “this is the moral law. It doesn’t matter what you’ve been taught. Deep down you know it’s wrong”.

I insist hawks is numb to moral law. He instead seeks “greater good” to prove is a good person. But twice tested him. Toga question “So jin wasn’t a person?” It’s fitting : in that moment to hawks jin wasn’t a person. He saved jin. He gave him a chance. He was a good person. But jin refused , high fives dabi he would have killed anyone. It was “Jin” . It was “Twice” and a good person must end a bad person. Especially after this one refuse any “chance of redemption”. However the way he was bent all over twice makes me think he knew it. He knew he had done a bad thing. That was the moral law: he seemed exhausted

Part 2

Thank you for this! I found it very insightful and interesting to read :D

[hermannsthumb]

Could you please write #43 grandparents/neighbors one?

43. we’re having our family meal at my grandparents’ house this year so fingers crossed your parents still live next door and you grew up to be even hotter

from winter writing prompts here

oh god this one got so long. sorry everyone! thank you to @k-sci-janitor for the alien bit because it was so fucking funny

------------

Holidays have gotten a little weird to manage since Newt transformed into a fully-fledged adult with an apartment and a job and stuff, so while he hasn’t made it to the big Geiszler celebration in Germany every December since starting college out of elementary school, he still tries to make a point of dropping by his dad’s for dinner and a movie or something to fill his holiday quota. It’s fine by him; he loves his family, but they’re definitely overwhelming, and trying to submit final grades and work on syllabuses for the next semester all while distant relatives ruffle his hair and ask him when he’s going to hit his growth spurt is not his idea of a relaxing time. It’s a constant point of contention between him and his dad. This year more than most, apparently.

“Your grandmother misses you!” he tells Newt sadly over their Chinese takeout. “She calls me every week to ask how you are, and why you never visit with them. Every week.” He waves a fork at Newt. “You’re breaking her heart.”

“I’m in the lab, like, twenty-four-seven, dad,” Newt sighs. It’s a well-rehearsed conversation at this point, but it doesn’t get any less tiresome. Especially because he knows his dad is lying about the phone call thing—Newt is a great grandson and texts his grandmother plenty, thank you very much, he would know if he was breaking her heart. “I’m working straight through winter break this year. Seriously.”

“That’s what you did last year,” Newt’s dad says. “And the year before that…” Newt turns the volume up on the TV to cut his dad off before he can segue into the next part of his argument, which is (usually) that Newt needs to work on his personal life, maybe settle down, produce some grandkids of his own. Or at least adopt a cat. Also well-rehearsed.

He’s not sure why he says what he does next—maybe in a desperate attempt to distract his dad further. Maybe because of the sudden onslaught of childhood memories the mention of his grandparents’ house brought on. “Hey, do you remember that boy who used to live next door to grandma?” he says. “He had the weird haircut and always dressed kind of funny?” Old-fashioned, and a little too formal for the sort of things that little kids tend to do, climbing trees or playing in the mud—sweatervests and polished loafers and starched-white knee-highs.

Newt’s dad blinks at him. Newt half expects him to declare that Newt is nuts, and that he has no idea what he’s talking about, like this is one of those horror stories where the childhood friend turns out to be some ghost who died fifty years prior. The clothing would match up, he guesses. But he smiles in recognition a moment later. “You mean the Gottlieb boy?” he says.

“Gottlieb,” Newt echoes. It sounds familiar enough. “Hermann, I think. When I’d stay with grandma for the summer we would play together every day. I wonder what he’s doing now.” Hermann was a smart guy, a real geek like Newt; he used to carry a graphing calculator around in his pocket and build the most goddamn pristine model spacecrafts Newt had ever seen. Hermann’s dad shipped him off to a prestigious boarding school the last summer Newt spent there, when they were around twelve or so. Newt started at MIT not long after. “Dude’s probably designing rocket ships by now or something.”

“You could ask him yourself if you came with me,” Newt’s dad laughs. “The Gottliebs never moved away, and their children actually visit. I’m sure your Hermann visits, too.”

“Ha,” Newt says. “Yeah.”

It’s snowing by the time Newt and his dad finish their movie, and Newt (fearing his dad’s driving even in ideal conditions) declines the offer of a lift home to trudge his way through it to his T stop instead. It’s nice to have the chance to be alone with his thoughts, anyway, because he can’t seem to get funny little Hermann Gottlieb out of his head. What is he doing now?

A quick Facebook search on the train produces a few Hermann Gottliebs, but none of them promising—none of them have the brown eyes or strangely angular face (devoid of any baby fat even that young) Newt remembers, none of them are from the right German countryside, none of them went to a preppy English boarding school. Google (utilizing the information Newt does have) is a little more rewarding, and by the time Newt presses the button to request his stop, he’s scrounged up a decent amount of info: Hermann Gottlieb has a doctorate in astrophysics, Hermann Gottlieb publishes papers at a slightly terrifying rate, and Hermann Gottlieb turned out kinda hot.

As Newt stares down at a slightly grainy current photograph of his old friend—haircut and clothing unchanged, a cane in hand, some round librarian glasses perched on the end of his nose, wide mouth twisted into a scowl—he suddenly recalls another thing about Hermann Gottlieb: the summer Hermann was sent away to boarding school was the summer that Hermann kissed Newt goodbye, shyly and tearfully, under the shade of the tall maple tree in his yard. It was the last time Newt ever saw Hermann. It was Newt’s first kiss.

“Oh, boy,” Newt says.

He texts his dad when he gets back to his apartment. When do we leave?

Newt feels like the belle of the fucking ball when he steps into his grandparents’ house a week later, snow dusting his shoulders, small suitcase clenched in his hand. His cheeks are kissed; his scarf and hat and leather jacket are brushed off and tossed onto a coat rack; his hair is in parts smoothed down (too messy!) and ruffled (too flat!); he’s hugged more times than he has been in the entire last year, probably. “Still playing around with bugs in the dirt, eh, Newt?” his grandfather booms, tucking Newt into the crook of his arm with enough force to knock Newt’s glasses off.

“Actually,” Newt squeaks, scrambling for both what he remembers of his very rusty German, and his glasses before they can hit the ground, “entomology isn’t really my main focus at—”

“Newt’s studying jellyfish now,” Newt’s dad declares proudly. “He went on a diving expedition this July.”

“Diving? How exciting,” Newt’s grandmother says.

“Yeah,” Newt says. He pushes his glasses back on. “Yeah, it was fascinating, I was lucky to get the funding for it. You wouldn’t believe the sorts of—”

“Isn’t that dangerous?” Newt’s cousin says.

“My little Newt’s a daredevil!” Newt’s dad says.

“It’s not that dangerous,” Newt says. “As long as you’re—”

“What happened to that nice man your father said you were dating?” Newt’s grandfather says. “With the, the what was it, the poetry? The poet? We thought you’d bring him!”

Newt flushes. Trust his dad to talk up some random guy Newt dated in March like it was a long-term affair and not an elongated one-night stand that fizzled out after three weeks. Though maybe that one’s on Newt—it’s not like he mentioned the one-night stand part to his dad, after all. He definitely didn’t mention that the guy ended it with a poem, too. “We broke up,” he says, weakly. He wriggles out from the throng of the crowd. “Look, it’s so great seeing you all, but I’m actually, like, really tired, soooooo…?”

“Oh, of course you are,” Newt’s grandmother says. She pats his head. “What a long flight you must have had! We’ll send someone up for you for dinner—you can have your old guest room.”

“Cool,” Newt says.

He scurries up the stairs.

The guest room he slept in during those summers is almost exactly the way he remembers it, but a little dustier—the floral quilt on the bed, his grandma’s sewing table crammed into the corner, the bookcase stocked with a weird combination of kid’s books and illustrated encyclopedias that Newt used to pore over for hours as a kid, often with Hermann. Newt draws back the embroidered curtains and peers out the window at the Gottliebs’ snow-capped house next door. Hermann’s window was directly across from his. It still is, technically, though the curtains (these navy blue and embroidered with little constellations) are pulled tight, and Newt has a feeling that Hermann hasn’t set foot in his old room in well over a decade. Two decades, probably.

He remembers the one summer he showed Hermann how to make a soup can telephone, and they managed to string it all the way across between their windows before discovering it kinda didn’t work as well as Newt said it would. He remembers when Hermann’s dad banned him from the Gottlieb house for tracking water all over their front hallway after he and Hermann went wading in the creek, but it was really Hermann who did it, because he forgot to take his shoes off and they got soaked, and Newt just took the fall for it so Hermann wouldn’t get in trouble. And when Hermann asked Newt to play astronaut with him, and Newt insisted on being an alien and mimed the chestburster scene from Alien, and Hermann freaked out so bad he fell in a mud puddle and got grounded for ruining his clothing, and Newt got grounded for that and for watching Alien when he wasn’t supposed to, and they spent the following few days staring sadly out across at each other before Newt’s grandma finally got tired of his moping and sent him to work weeding the garden. He remembers knotting a little friendship bracelet for Hermann out of embroidery thread he found in his grandmother’s sewing basket and Hermann vowing to keep it until he died.

Newt’s half of the soup can phone is still on the windowsill, though the string snapped and crumbled apart years ago. He picks at the peeling Chicken Noodle label, so distracted that he almost doesn’t notice the light suddenly seeping through at the edges of Hermann’s curtains, or the way they’re pushed open—almost.

Hermann—real, live, adult Hermann, botched haircut and round glasses and all—stares out at Newt with a shocked expression on his face. Newt drops the can with a clatter.

Then he waves.

“Hey, Grandma?” Newt says, poking his head into the kitchen. Tonight’s dinner is a massive pot of soup boiling away on the stovetop, dessert a mountain of cookies and tiny pastries on serving platters on the counters. Newt hasn’t had food that looked this good since he moved out, to be honest. The intersection of Newt’s sad lack of cooking skills and his attempts at vegetarianism means he eats a lot of boxed mac-and-cheese and frozen Vegetable Lovers’ pizzas. “Are you—?"

“Oh, Newt!” Newt’s grandmother says. She sets down her wooden spoon. “Are you feeling rested, then?”

“Yeah,” Newt says. “Grandma, I was wondering, could I—uh—maybe run some food over to the Gottliebs? To be…neighborly? We just have so much, and—”

“That’s a wonderful idea,” Newt’s grandmother says. “They keep to themselves, mostly, but I can’t imagine they’d turn it down. You might even see your little friend again! What was his name? You were so fond of him.”

“Hermann,” Newt says, quickly shoving cookies into a red-lid plastic container. “Thanks, Grandma.”

He tucks the tupperware under his arm and nearly wipes out on the icy front path he runs to the Gottliebs’ so fast. Before he can so much as catch his breath and knock, their door swings open; Hermann, dressed in a tacky Hannukah sweater, arches an eyebrow at him. “I saw you sprint over here like a bloody madman,” he says, in blessed English. He must’ve remembered how shitty Newt’s German was when they were kids. “Hello, Newton. What’s so terribly important?”

His voice got deeper—expected—and he swapped out his German accent for an English one somewhere along the way. Probably at his stuffy boarding school. He also got taller—he’s got a few inches on Newt now, but Newt admits that’s not exactly hard. God, he’s even hotter in person. “Uh,” Newt says. Why is he here? Oh, right. He thrusts out the tupperware. “I brought some cookies over for you?”

Hermann peers down at the offering over his glasses. His forehead wrinkles. “How considerate,” he says. He pulls an olive-green parka on and steps out onto the porch, tugging the door shut behind him. He taps at a peeling porch swing with the end of his cane. “Just leave them there. Would you like to take a walk?”

It’s freezing, and snowing, but for some reason, a walk sounds like the best idea in the world right now. “Yes, please,” Newt says, and chucks the cookies onto the swing.

“I must say,” Hermann says, after their meandering walk around the Gottliebs’ yard takes them to the old maple tree. The branches are bare, but thick, and shield them from most of the falling snow. Hermann’s breath puffs out white in front of his angular face. The last time I stood here, Newt thinks, he kissed me. “I really did not expect to see you.”

“I didn’t expect to see you, either,” Newt admits. “From what I remember, you and your family weren’t—uh—well, very close. I didn’t think you’d be coming back to share in the holiday cheer with them, is what I mean.”

The corner of Hermann’s mouth twitches up. “That’s certainly one way of describing it. Yes, I suppose you’re right—my father is a bit of a bastard, isn’t he?” Newt laughs awkwardly, unsure whether to agree or attempt to weakly the defend a guy who openly hated him for being a bad influence on Hermann most of his childhood; he’s grateful when Hermann continues and saves him the choice. “This is the first year I’ve come home in a long while. My brother’s just had a daughter, you see, and I thought I should start getting used to playing uncle.”

“Oh, congrats,” Newt says. Hermann shrugs, and Newt has the distinct feeling that this is Hermann’s older brother, who used to dissemble Hermann’s telescope and hide the pieces around the house when Hermann annoyed him, and tattled on Newt and Hermann to Hermann’s parents the one time Newt snuck in to see Hermann after he got banned. He always made Newt thankful that he was an only child. “Same here, actually. Not the uncle thing—I mean I haven’t visited since I was in college. Too busy.”

“I know,” Hermann says, and then adds teasingly (in a way that makes color flood Newt’s cheeks and his heart beat just a little faster), “I’ve looked you up online. Er—quite a bit recently, in fact. I was curious. You’ve made quite the name for yourself, haven’t you, Dr. Geiszler?”

“I,” Newt squeaks, and then coughs. “I mean, I guess? I like…science.”

“I oughtn’t be surprised,” Hermann says. “You were always giving me bugs, and salamanders, and funny little frogs—”

Newt liked bugs, and salamanders, and frogs, but he liked Hermann more, and the gifts had a lot more to do with the latter than the former, because what kid wouldn’t want bugs or salamanders or frogs, right? Not that Hermann ever appreciated them—especially not the worms Newt would pluck from the sidewalks after rainstorms. He thinks he got grounded for that one, too, because his grandma wouldn’t believe that he really wasn’t trying to terrorize the poor Gottlieb boy. “And what about you?” Newt says. He pokes his elbow into Hermann’s side. “Dr. Gottlieb? Guess those model rockets paid off.”

(“No, Newton,” Hermann would snap at him on the rare occasions he would allow Newt to watch him piece one together, “the glue hasn’t dried yet. You have to be patient, or else it’ll fall apart.”)

“Not yet,” Hermann says, “but I hope soon.”

Hermann smiles at him. A snowflake catches in his eyelashes—his long, pretty, dark eyelashes. “Do you remember when you kissed me here?” Newt blurts out.

“It’s hardly the sort of thing I’d forget,” Hermann says. He reaches out and tucks a piece of Newt’s hair up into his hat. “I like your tattoos—I saw the photographs on your social media accounts. They suit you.” Newt wonders if this means Hermann saw the shirtless selfie he posted on Instagram. “I’m also pleased to see you’ve gotten your braces removed. It wasn’t a very pleasant experience last time.”

Then he leans in and kisses Newt. Again, technically. It’s so light and brief Newt hardly believes it even happened. Their glasses clack together, and when Hermann pulls away, he straightens out Newt’s.

“I confess,” Hermann says, “that I’m wholly pleased to see how you’ve turned out. I hope that wasn’t too forward of me. I’ve been thinking about doing it all night.”

“Jeez, dude,” Newt says, blinking at him, his head swimming just a little. Hermann looks smug. “Not, uh, not too forward. So. Uh. You wanna get dinner or something this week and catch up?”

Hermann snorts, and nods.

[deltaengineering]

that was the winter anime 2021 that was

Still not quite ready for a dozen posts about how terrible the likes of Combatants Will Be Dispatched are, sorry. Watch Vivy though, it owns. Here’s some more things that are (mostly) good. As always, worst to best.

Yatogame-chan Kansatsu Nikki S3

Yatogame has long run out of hot Nagoya facts and its ensemble comedy never amounted to much, so now it seems mostly content to just spam more and more wacky character designs. About the only thing that it has left going for it is that 3 minutes a week are more effort to drop than to watch, so I expect them to make a movie next. 4/10

Go-toubun no Hanayome S2

Quints is a weird one. S1 was a barely good enough (i.e., well above average) implementation of the ages old harem chestnut. S2 is actually better at the core of its appeal, since it gives all the characters a sharper profile (things like taking Nino from joke to badass and making Ichika a villain are no mean feat), but it does pay a steep price for it. You see, to deliver a steady drip feed of meaningful character moments it apparently has to rush through the source material at a breakneck pace, which completely wrecks the "story" part of this story and makes every episode seem like a recap. And it still keeps wasting precious time on vestigial nonsense like its framing device and the Kyoto flashback scenario that was already the worst part of S1. But by far the most annoying aspect is its insistence on keeping all the options valid, since it prevents any real progress and makes everything seem arbitrary and pointless. So sure enough, after a season of much ado we still don't end up anywhere — you can't really raise the stakes if all at stake was "who wins" to begin with. It's watchable and even enjoyable scene-for-scene but it's getting harder and harder to call it a solid show overall. 5/10

Skate Leading Stars

I was watching this primarily because I didn't like Yuri on Ice much and wanted to see if something that is a blatant attempt to cash in on it would be better — because while YoI delivers on one aspect (being hella gay), it really is an absolute shambles of a sports show. And sure enough, Skate Leading has none of the auteur appeal of YoI, but it just works much better. In particular I appreciate how it managed to make me care even a little about a cast of assholes, which is a nice contrast to the nauseatingly ingratiating way YoI tries to make you love its characters. Also, Skate Leading is just generally cheap and unambitious, so not susceptible to trying hard and painfully flaming out on the presentation side like YoI is. But at some point you gotta let go of these comparisons and on its own Skate Leading is... just fine, I guess? Competent, mildly engaging, not very memorable. And that's probably where it loses to Yuri on Ice in the end after all, even if I think it's "better". 6/10

Idoly Pride

Idoly Pride sold itself on me with a really good (and hilarious/tragic) first episode that was just too bizarre to ignore — I mean, how can you ignore GHOST IDOL MANAGERS. Well, the majority of the show isn't like that. It's a competent and solid version of the idol franchise show, yes, but it really had more potential than that. Especially midseason, it gets lost in these dozens of characters, and while they're all likeable, it does seem like a waste of a good story just centered on Mana/Kotona/Sakura. By the end it comes back around to the heart of the matter with a Maeda-style sob story, which could be a disaster but seasoned veteran Jukki Hanada makes it work anyway. Overall, there's quite a bit of ridiculous hacky melodrama in this, but quite honestly that's the best part and I wish it would concentrate more on it. The rest is just okay. 6/10

Yuru Camp S2

Yuru Camp is still likely the best pure iyashikei show when it gets down to business. Compared to S1 though, this seems to happen less and less. At its peaks (i.e., basically any quiet moment with Rin) it's at least as good as ever, and there's some good cast additions like Mini-Inuko, but it appears that Yuru Camp simply has run out of things you can do with camping and it fills up the time with other... stuff. This stuff includes the generic school club shenanigans it was never particularly good at, and a gigantic helping of crass consumerism. Yeah, I would say the majority of Yuru Camp is just a straight up infomercial at this point, which itself ranges from the perfectly acceptable (which cute anime isn't about food constantly), to the sketchy (I don't know whether the Izu tourism board cut this production a fat check, but if they didn't, Yuru Camp still gives its best effort to make it seem that way) to the highly irritating – I am aware that camping requires gear and you can't just ignore that, but you most definitely do not require whole arcs dedicated to talking about raising funds for the purposes of acquiring the Lamp of Comfy Happiness at your friendly local Caribou™ either. Not to mention an arc where the aforementioned lame school club does the same, for double irritation. Make no mistake, this show is so riddled with scenes that beg for a solution to embed affiliate links in video files that it makes me wish I was watching something as anticapitalist and underground as Love Live. And irritating really is the last thing a show with this core concept, as stellar as it is at that, can afford to be. Bummer. 6/10

SKOO the Infinity

Skoo has one really huge asset: ADAM, its magnificent villain. It also has one really huge liability: Reki, its not magnificent protagonist. To be more specific, it's very good at anything outrageous, physics-defying and silly, such as most scenes ADAM is in, and quite bad at anything serious, dramatic (in a serious way) and down to earth, such as most scenes Reki is in. So, what's the verdict? Well, the rest of the cast is more ADAM-like, and Reki's co-protagonist Langa is fine as the straight (yeah, right) man. The tedious buddy drama is a comparatively small part of this show, and at least it pays off quite well in the end. Seriously, I was ready to give this a 6, but the final episode is probably the best one of the show, in all of its aspects. That's really not something you see often. Skoo's a great time. Except when it's not. 7/10

Non Non Biyori Nonstop

Speaking of the rare good ending, what about we gave one of those to a slim and inconsequential slice-of-life show? NNB has always been solid, comfy and amusing quality with a couple of standout moments (usually something with Renge), and Nonstop has that plus an ending as conclusive as any show of this type is ever going to have. Besides, it does a lot of things right by focusing on more characters than the central 4 (especially Konomi has great material in S3), it expands the universe just enough to not get stale, and it moves things forward — It's definitely a lot better than the movie, is what I'm saying. Apart from that, well, we're three seasons in, if you have any interest in this you probably don't need me to explain what's good about NNB at this point. Bonus points for being nothing but an ad for the manga. 7/10

Wonder Egg Priority

Oh boy, so here's the big one. Wonder Egg is the rare Meaningful Arthouse Show About Real Issues You Guys, as you might have heard. And well, the long and short of it is that it's a very good show with quite a few glaring problems (besides not actually being finished due to production issues, but what we have is enough of an ending to be able to meaningfully talk about it). In particular, one problem: WEP is, at its core, one of these metaphorical Magical Girl-ish series that are just a thin layer of abstraction over coming-of-age or societal problems. The issue is that "metaphorical" in this case means "literal" and "thin" means "basically nonexistent". This show is not subtle regarding what it's about, at all. This is a double-edged sword — on the positive side, some things really should just be said aloud, and I'm really, really fucking tired of the Ikuhara style of "here's some wacky things, maybe a blog post will eventually tell you how it's actually about the most important thing ever" obfuscation — if it's really so important, just spell it out. On the other hand, there are limits to this and when a second, different Ai appears I don't really need a voiceover line telling me that yep, this show is about parallel universes now. WEP spells out many important things, but it also spells out many things that are implicitly clear or better left vague. Not to mention that with being so obvious up front, the show's tendency to leave figuring out what it's actually saying about it up to the viewer can leave the wrong impression. Again, I settled on the opinion that it's subtle after all where it counts the most, but you might easily get the impression that it pulls its punches (Ikuhara does this the exact other way around — once you figure out what the fuck he's talking about it's abundantly clear what he's saying about it).

In fact, this show is so good at subtle, quiet character moments that it calls into question the need for big huge fighting fantasy layer in the first place, especially since I'm not a fan of the fantasy designs and the fights aren't great. Sure, they look impressive on a technical level (this show is very good looking in general), but the lack of actual impact or rhythm makes me think this is not made by people who are very familiar with action and maybe they should have asked some seasoned shounen veterans for this — or just, you know, not do it. They can (and do) impress with character acting in quiet scenes just the same. And while Ai's character story actually does pay off quite nicely by the end we got, and Momoe and Rika are also handled well, Neiru's backstory is significantly less good, not to mention the whole Frill subplot regarding the show's mythology that they introduced just before (and that's the part to be resolved at a later date), which is a huge can of worms. We'll see how well they handle that, I suppose, but as it is it's a weird and vestigial detour that doesn't add much besides thematic headaches.

But yeah, apart from all that — I like it, a lot. Great character writing in the details, cool looks for the most part, tons of ambition, and a message that I consider to be appropriately handled — for the most part, and for now. Not quite ambitious arthouse anime at its finest, but also not a pretentious disaster like Sarazanmai, Monogatari et al. 8/10

[mampysou]

Day 11 of Harringrove April.

Also read on AO3

Some blood and injury detail below and homophobic language.

Hug

He doesn’t know why he followed the noise; you’d think after everything that had happened over the last year in Hawkins he wouldn’t, but here he was chasing after a strange grumbling sound. He couldn’t quite describe it. It sounded human. Just. Whatever or whoever it was sounded in pain, and being the sap he was, he needed to check it out before he could leave with peace of mind.

The back street was dark and damp in the rain, the fat drops bounced out of puddles and dropped from his nose. The noise was getting louder and he tried his best to quiet his feet. His mother always said he sounded like a baby elephant when he moved around and complained loudly, and regularly, that he woke her on his way out to work. He was sure he had to turn one more corner and he would be in sight of whatever was making the noise.

He steeled himself, preparing to run in case he once again came face to face with a monster from a different dimension. Though running wouldn’t do him much good if he did. A sudden need to be armed tore through him as he scanned the floor for anything that could be used as a weapon. He picked up a trash can lid and swing it around a few times. If that hero guy in Dustin’s comics could use a shield to beat people up surely Steve could do the same, right?

He tested its weight and slipped his hand through the handle, gripping it tightly. All his friend would be cursing his name if they knew where he was right now. He had promised them and, in turn, made them promise him that this wasn’t something they would be doing by themselves ever. If there was ever any sign of trouble he should radio immediately and they would come running. Night or day his little pack of nerds would be there.

But for some reason Steve was convinced that this was something he shouldn’t call them for. It’s not that he won’t need them, but he felt like they shouldn’t see what’s coming. It sent a shiver of nerves and apprehension down his spine as he reached the corner. ‘Shield’ up and ready he took the final step towards the unknown.

The last thing he expected to see when he rounded the building was a person scrunched into the smallest ball possible, flithy, wet and bleeding. He didn’t recognise them, but he rushed forwards regardless. He checked the area for anything suspicious, before crouching next to shaking body.

He could see they were male now, no women in Hawkins were built like that. Strong arms wrapped over his head, like he was protecting it, and his knees touched his chest. A feat would have deemed impossible if he hadn’t seen it, due to so incredibly tight blue jeans.

The guy had cuts up his arms and what looked to be handprints wrapped around his wrists. His jeans had tears in them, and grazes in the holes like he had fallen on the pavement. He could see tiny bits of gravel wedged inside the cuts and scrapes, which were crying out to be cleaned.

Steve didn’t touch him at first, seeing how terrified this guy was he didn’t know how he would react. He just spoke to him in quiet but firm terms.

“Hey. How can I help?” he said seeing the whole-body shudder as his voice reached the boys ears. “You're injured and need medical attention; can I drive you to the hospital?”

The guy’s head shot up and Steve tried not to fall back on his arse. Billy Hargrove’s face looked back at him frozen in terror. His blue eyes ringed with red and both eye sockets turning deep shades of purple. His lip was cut and he had another hand print around his neck.

“No fucking hospitals.” He croaked voice not sounding anything like Steve knows it should.

Steve kept calm. It didn’t matter who it was, Billy still needed help and he would give it as best he could. “Right, so can I take you back home?” This reaction was worse. Billy flinched away from him, back hitting the wall, and Steve heard all the air puff out of him.

“Okay so not home either then.” Steve supplied.

Billy, who Steve was sure hadn’t recognised him yet, probably because his eyes were on the way to swelling up, tried to speak again. He coughed twice before he managed, “That ain’t my home no more.” And his head dropped back into his hands.

Steve nodded to himself and came up with his last suggestion, he had assumed that not hospitals meant, no police either because taking someone in in this condition would over lead to them turning up anyway.

“My house then. Its empty, just me home tonight and I have all the stuff I need to help you out.” He watched for any reaction and for a while there was nothing. Just as he was about to give in he caught the barest nod of his head in agreement.

“I am going to help you up, okay?” He reached out to grab Billy somewhere it probably wouldn’t hurt too much, only to be shoved away by tattered fists. Whoever did this to Billy, he obviously fought back. He watched as Billy tried to stand with very little success. Steve gently wrapped his arm around his waist, hoisted Billy’s arms around his shoulders and started the long trudge back to his car.

What felt like an hour later, but was probably only about fifteen minutes, they got back to Steve’s car. Billy went rigid next to him; he internally cursed the blonde must have recognised his car.

“Jesus fuck, of course it’s you, Harrington.” He spluttered around a cough.

“Yeah, yeah, just get in the car so we can get you sorted out, Hargrove.” He complained as he man-handled Billy into the bimmer. “What happened Billy?” he asked as he climbed into the driver’s seat.

“Got beat up moron. What the fuck does it look like?” he grumbled at Steve.

“Hargrove got beat up? Who did you fight a giant?” he asked trying his best to keep the mocking from his voice.

“No, just four guys.”

“Four? Why the hell did they do that?” he asked. How on earth Billy got a single punch in was beyond him. Fighting four people wasn’t like in the movies. They didn’t wait patiently for the first guy to stop hitting you then attack. No, they tended to rush you, hoping to over whelm, which clearly, they managed.

“What did you say to get in this state?” he amended. Billy had a notoriously short fuse; one Steve had been on the receiving end of more than once.

Billy looked so pale. His tan face was much greyer now losing nearly all its usual golden colour. “Was just being me. Didn’t know his friends were waiting. Fucking dick heads.”

“What do you mean being me?” he asked quietly trying not to spook him now he was opening up. He could only imagine he wasn’t entirely sure what he was saying.

“’m usually more careful ya know.” Billy’s words were slurring but he seemed to be on a role. “But he was hot and was flirtin’ so I thought fuck it. Let’s try.” Steve thought he got what Billy was saying but this is Billy Hargrove, he could be, could he? “He tugged me round a corner then his buddies were there and they just went off. Calling me a faggot and stuff.” He groaned. “My head is fucking killing me.”

Steve stayed silent. Just drove towards his house in shock. Billy had just told him he was gay. Or at very least liked to hook up with guys. He wouldn’t judge. He was friends with Robin and he could appreciate a hot looking guy. Rob Lowe and David Bowie were something else. So, yea, no judging here.

He pulled into his drive and Billy was drifting off in his seat. Steve knew this wasn’t great, he needed Billy to stay awake. He had no clue why, just that it was bad news. He slammed the car door shut behind him hoping it would jar Billy awake before he had to get him out of the car.

Luck was on his side for once as Billy stared at him, glassy eyed but at least awake. Heaving Billy into the house was no mean feat, especially as this time he seemed to be putting in little to no effort.

“You weigh a fucking tonne!” Steve complained as he propped Billy against the door.

“s’all muscle baby!” he grinned at Steve, tongue peeking out from behind his bloodied teeth and swaying a bit as he attempted to flex. Steve just held in an eye roll. Of course Billy was flirting, he would always find time to flirt no matter how beaten down he looked.

“Just get in the house Hargrove.” He said pointing in the direction of kitchen. Billy seemed to have regained some semblance of control as his used the wall to help him in the right direction. Steve tried not to cringe as he watched the smear of blood and dirt lengthen down the hall but at least he would have a while to clean it up before anyone else came home again.

He found Billy slumped on the floor, against a cabinet, head once again cradled in his hands. Steve collected what he needed from around his house and returned to crouch down near him again. He laid everything out in between them both and pointed to each one as he was about to use it. He moved slowly, gently and carefully whilst he cleaned and patched up Billy.

Billy just stared at him the entire time. He nodded silently every time Steve asked permission to do something until he finished. He still looked like shit but at least he wasn’t bleeding anymore.

“So...” Steve started, not really knowing where he was going. “Can I get you to go to the cops Billy? Those guys targeted you and that fucking sucks.” Billy was already shaking his head. “But Hopper could help you Billy!” Steve insisted.

“No fucking way. No one would help me, he would probably just add to the bruises. No one helps people like me Harrington.” He snapped, but there was no venom in it. Just aching sadness that Steve felt to his core.

“I did. And I would again.” He stated softly. But quickly he felt anger rising inside him. “You shouldn’t have to go through this shit just because you are... Because you like... Guys!” He was so angry by the end, how could anyone believe they were so alone that no one would help them when they were hurt and broken? Part of Steve screamed that he understood. It could have gone that way for him after Nancy if he hadn’t had Dustin or Robin.

“I’m dirty, Harrington. People don’t like dirty things.” He told him. His shoulders were slumped and he looked down and away from Steve.

Steve surged forward and ignored Billy’s flinch as he did. He wrapped his arms around his shoulders and pulled his head in towards his neck. It was a damn awkward hug but eventually Billy relaxed and locked his hands behind Steve’s back. As he held Billy he spoke to him. “You are not alone Billy. Any time you need help you come to me. I will help you. You aren’t dirty.” He hesitated but ploughed on to a confession.

“If you’re dirty then so am I. And so is my best friend. So fuck them and stay where we can help.” A silence hung in the air it was tense as he felt Billy’s hands tighten in his jacket.

“You’re like me?” he asked. His voice muffled by Steve’s shoulder.

“Yeah, I am.” He stated. It was the first time he had admitted it to himself let alone said it out loud.

“Oh.” Not quite what Steve was expecting him to say.

“Yeah, oh.”

Billy lifted his head and looked Steve straight in the eyes and said, “So Harrington, can I take you on a date?”

Hope you liked it!

[leejihoonownsmyheart]

First to Break

Part two of the New Year, New Me Series

Summary:

New Years was possible one of the best nights of your life, but the sudden loss of sense doesn’t mean that anything is going to change between you and Jeonghan. After all, you two had spent ages hating each other. Nothing was going to change that… Right?

An 8k+ requested sequel to New Year, New Me 

Warnings include: degradation, jeonghan gets lil jealous :), choking, semi-public sex, car sex, y/n is definitely a bit of an exhibitionist, creampies, many things I’m probably forgetting smh- remember use a condom >.< Oh and I hope this was worth the wait!

 -

After…. The events of the New Year- did you really start this year off getting fucked by Yoon Jeonghan of all things? God, you almost couldn’t believe it. And you sure as hell weren’t going to talk about it either.

You had walked downstairs after everything, and Joshua had asked you where you had been. Fighting the overwhelming urge to look at Jeonghan, you had provided the excuse that Jeonghan had told you to, and of course, Joshua had believed it without a second thought.

He rolled his eyes: “You and Jeonghan should really work out… Watever you guys have going on.”

Jesus, he had no idea.

It was so weird to think that Jeonghan had seen you naked… Someone that you had spent so much time resenting- someone that you frankly still didn’t particularly like had seen you in your most vulnerable state.

And you couldn’t even really get the image out of your head. You just remembered what Jeonghan had felt like with his fat cock buried deep inside of you, how you had moaned shamelessly at the simple feeling of his fingers gripping your hair, pulling at your roots. You shifted as you remembered his words to you, the way that your arousal had only grown stronger everytime he thrusted into you hard and called you a slut.

You could almost remember exactly how full you had felt with him inside of you, you could almost still feel the stretch of his girth, how much you had wanted to just scream his name and-

“Hey, are you okay?” You jolted a little when Joshua reached forward and touched your hand. Forcing a nervous smile to cross your lips as you did so to make it seem like less a violent reaction.

“Sorry?”

“You just… Zoned out while looking at Jeonghan… Did he do something to you that you haven’t told me about?” Joshua asked you softly. You rolled your eyes, batting Joshua’s hand away with a scoff.

You hoped that Jeonghan couldn’t hear you two… It didn’t matter, after all, whatever you said to Joshua he would believe your words. He would nod his head along with whatever you had to say, and take your excuse without a single grain of salt.

“If anything had happened Joshua, you would be the first to know. I’m still mad about New Year’s. I swear he poured that drink on me on purpose.”

But if Jeonghan could hear your words- if he knew that you had been looking at him then he would know what was really going through your mind.

“You two really are something,” Joshua said with a shake of his head, a puzzled look crossing his face. Before he could say more, he looked down at his food, and poked it with his fork. You took that chance to let your eyes trail back over to Jeonghan at the table over from you with some of your other friends.

You couldn’t really say you were surprised that Jeonghan was staring right back at you, but you wished you could say that he wasn’t. Your eyebrows raised at him, putting on a skeptical face even though you should know that you were the one that shouldn’t be acting like his gaze was unwarranted.

Fucking hell, he had definitely heard.

Over the course of the next few weeks, you honestly tried your best to pretend like what had happened between you and Jeonghan hadn’t happened at all. You opted to not go to the events you knew he would be at, complaining to no end if you had to hang out with him anyways.

At social events, Jeonghan also acted like nothing had happened- except for a few more added teases here and there that had your heart pounding in worry at being outed for what you two had done.

Other than that he just stole your food like he normally did, and turned to your friends and-

“So, y/n, started off the New Year on a low note,” your friend Yoojung stated softly. Your eyebrows raised and sighed. She had no clue.

“You’re not wrong,” you mumbled, your fingers fumbling with your straw. “I’m going to be alone forever.”

Joshua laughed and reached across the table to hold your hand sympathetically.

“Don’t worry dear, if you don’t find a boyfriend within the next few years you can live in Mina and I’s basement,” he assured. Mina slapped his shoulder at that and he jumped, which just made you laugh harder.

“I did not agree to that,” Mina exclaimed pointedly. Yoojung rolled her eyes and grabbed your wrist and drew your attention to here.

“Don’t listen to him, I’ll set you up on a blind date… Or take you out to a bar or something, it must’ve been ages since you last got laid,” she stated bluntly. You groaned and let your head roll back, but before you could say anything in retaliation Jeonghan snorted out a laugh.

Everyone’s eyes turned to Jeonghan, all different levels of confusion riddled across their faces. He coughed and gestured to his phone.

“Saw something funny.”

You could tell that literally nobody believed him, but they all nodded as if such a thing was plausible.

“Anyways,” you redirected with a roll of your own eyes. Mina’s eyes gleamed as she jumped back into the conversation.

“Actually! I have the perfect guy that you could meet. You can come over sometimes after we hang out if you would like. He’s one of my roommates,” she offered. Before you could respond, she was pulling out a phone showing you the picture of a man that you had yet to see.

The guy in question was attractive, and you were going to comment on just that, but before you could Mina started talking again.

“He’s is handsome and tall and strong, and really nice,” she said enthusiastically. Jeonghan scoffed and you glanced over to find that the boy didn’t look very happy. You weren’t really sure why. He grunted when he saw you looking at him, and a mischeavious grin spread over his face.

“I don’t know if the nice guy is quite y/n’s type,” he said pointedly. Joshua gave him a puzzled glance and Seungkwan turned to look at him, question in his eyes. You decided that you really didn’t want anyone to build on that comment so you ignored him looking back at Mina.

“He sounds like a dream,” you said with a laugh. “How come he isn’t already with anyone?”

“His last girlfriend cheated on him,” Mina explained. “It took him a while before he finally agreed to go out with girls again, but he’s finally ready, and I think you would be perfect. You’re so-”

“Let me guess,” Jeonghan interrupted. You all looked at him once again. “She’s just so sweet, and pretty and innocent?”

Mina snorted.

“Jeonghan stop being such an asshole,” Mina stated. “What do you care if she gets set up on a date?”

He shrugged.

“I just didn’t know that she was so desperate for a boyfriend that she would date any guy who comes her way.”

Jeonghan plucked the phone with the guys picture on it out of Mina’s hand and squinted at him.

“I mean look at this guy. He isn’t even that handsome.”

Seungkwan grunted as he took the phone from Jeonghan’s hands and slide it back over to Mina.

“He’s extremely handsome,” he insisted. Seungkwan met your eyes and smiled at you. “You should go out with him. If Mina approves then he’s got to be truly something.”

You hummed along with his words, doing your best to ignore the look on Jeonghan’s face. You weren’t sure what was bothering him so much about the situation, but you could tell he wasn’t happy. Normally you’d be pretty proud at having made him so angry that he was glaring holes into the table you two were sitting at… But today, not so much.

You leaned back in your seat, letting your mind wander in thought.

“I’ll have to think about it,” you stated softly. Your voice was softer than you really meant it to be. “Honestly, since the New Year started I haven’t been too worried about being alone. Maybe I’m rushing things.”

“Maybe you aren’t rushing them enough,” Jeonghan murmured. You jumped a little at his words, surprised to find that not only had he grown closer to you, but he was right behind you, and the only person who heard his words, was you.

His fingers buried themselves suddenly into your hair, making you jump in surprise at the sensation. You were suddenly reminded  of what it had felt like when you two were together and…

You cleared your throat.

No, you couldn’t think like that right now.

“What are you-”

“Your hair is a mess,” Jeonghan replied disgruntedly. “I’m tired of looking at it. Does it hurt you to brush it every once in a while?”

You were speechless as he began to run his fingers through the length of his hair. At first you weren’t sure exactly what he was doing, but then you realized that he was beginning to braid your hair. You looked over at Joshua but he looked more amused by your antics then anything, as if this was a pretty common occurrence.

You supposed it might seem like that to him. Jeonghan was always complaining about your appearance. Insisting he take you shopping so that you could actually learn how to dress.

Sure he’d never actually taken the threatened actions, but you supposed it wasn’t so far fetched to imagine it would be something he would do.

Still, all you could do was grit your teeth as he worked.

“Don’t you think you’re pulling my hair a little bit hard?” You grumbled softly. It was quiet, too quiet really for anyone to hear but Jeonghan still heard your words.

“You weren’t complaining on-”

You sharply elbowed Jeonghan in the side, which just made him laugh.

“And here I thought you were the one who liked it rough,” he mumbled right back.

“So, what movie are we going to see today anyways?” Mina asked softly. Joshua hummed and looked to the side.

“Didn’t Mingyu say that he wanted to see Onward?”

Seungkwan perked up at that.

“Oh yeah! We have to see Onward,” Seungkwan agreed instantly.

You nodded you’re agreement to which Jeonghan grunted at.

“Keep your head still,” he mumbled in aggravation.

“Stop telling me what to do,” you grumbled back. “Nobody asked you to do my hair.”

“Well somebody-”

“Jeonghan instead of arguing with y/n, just agree or disagree to the movie okay?” Hansol interrupted with a playful expression on his face. Jeonghan sighed.

“Yeah, yeah,” he mumbled with a wave of his free hand. “I’ll watch whatever you guys want to watch.” “Then it’s settled,” Joshua said. “We’ll watch Onward. Only question is how everyone will be getting there.”

Around you the discussion of who would drive who began to develop around you. Considering how long all of you had been friends, you would think that there would be a set driver for a set group of people, but you guys were always shuffling around who road with who.

Jeonghan didn’t really like riding with people or driving people so he tended to drive alone, and everyone just worked around that. You were barely even listening to the words going on around you, more focused on Jeonghan’s fingers as he finished braiding your hair.

“We could put her with Cheol?”

“Nah, he’s already got a full car.”

“What about…”

“Go along with this and I swear I’ll make it worth your while sweetheart.”

You shivered when you realized that Jeonghan had still been that close to you. You wrapped your arms around your chest and did your best to pretend like he hadn’t spoken to you at all.

God, you had no clue what he was talking about, but you had a feeling that you didn’t want to know either way.

Jeonghan hummed.

“I’ll carpool with y/n,” he stated softly.

A surprised silence fell over the group as everyone turned to look at you and Jeonghan, surprise littered over their faces- yours included.

“What?” Joshua asked suddenly. Jeonghan looked over at Joshua with a calmness that honestly scared you.

“I’ll drive y/n,” Jeonghan repeated. “I mean, she does live close to me, and I have ample room in my car. I can take her there and the home after.”

Still everyone just stared at you too. There wasn’t much that you could say or even think.

“I guess… I mean if she is okay with it,” Joshua stated unsurely. You swallowed hard, choosing your next words carefully.

“Of course, I would prefer not to… But Jeonghan’s right, it is convenient,” you agreed tentatively. Joshua stared at you. Not suspicious but clearly thoughtful over the whole situation.

“Alright, then y/n and Jeonghan it is.”

You tried not to fret about the car ride as the dinner wore on, and you didn’t really have to until finally it was time to head over to Jeonghan’s car.

You waved goodbye to the rest of your friends, promising to meet them soon and without a word got into Jeonghan’s car.

You had never been in it before, and never had any interest in it, so you had never paid much attention to it before. It was a nice car, with dark seats and a clean interior. You liked it quite a bit. You ogt settled into his passenger seat and didn’t say a word as the car started rolling.

You guys sat there in silence for a while and Jeonghan didn’t speak a word until he was further into the city, far enough from cars that you barely saw a single person on the street. You had never seen anyone take this way to the movie theatre before, and you had a good feeling that he wasn’t taking a back way.

“I want you to touch yourself.” You were shocked by his sudden words, filling the silence in the car. You looked over at him, with wide eyes, but his eyes were glued to the road.

“I’m sorry?” You asked him, sure you had misheard him or maybe he had misspoken.

“Did I stutter? Touch yourself.”

You wanted to argue, tell him that he was being ridiculous to think that you were so horny just being around him that you would touch yourself in a car but… Well, he was right. You slowly reached down between your legs, glancing at Jeonghan out of the corner of your eye. He wasn’t watching you, so you unbuttoned the top button of your pants.

You slid it down your hips and down to the floor and then after glancing at Jeonghan again, began to rub yourself through the fabric.

“Spread your legs.”

You were shocked by the sudden sound of his voice, but you did as he said.

“Further.”

You scrunched your nose and shot him a glare as you moved your legs even wider, having to prop your feet up on the seat beneath you just so that you could manage the position.

“Is this okay sir?” You asked in aggravation. He snickered.

“You always get so defensive,” Jeonghan teased lightly. “But you’re right where I want you. Tell me… Are you wet for me?”

Your cheeks blazed red at his words, but you didn’t stop rubbing yourself through your panties anyways.

“Yeah,” you admitted in embarrassment. Jeonghan hummed and turned on his turning signal. You were just glad it was dark enough out that no one could really see what you were doing in the car even if anyone was around.

“Good, slide aside your underwear. Slip a finger into yourself.”

You were beyond embarrassed still, but you also wanted Jeonghan to fuck you. Knowing his hot and cold ass he wouldn’t if you didn’t listen, so you warily did as he wanted. Your finger was cold as you slid it inside yourself, a stark contrast to your burning pussy.

You let your head come to a rest on the headrest, and you began to pant a little because of how badly you wanted more inside of you. Still, you were a little afraid to do too much, knowing Jeonghan wanted to be calling the shots.

“Are you tight darling?”

You nodded slowly.

“Y-yeah,” you added. He slowed the car down a little for a stop light.

“It’s been too long since I fucked you hasn’t it?” He asked. “I’ve been wanting you every day since that night. Dreaming of being buried in that pussy again.”

The light turned green and he started the car again.

“Finger yourself for me,” he instructed, and you were quick to obey. A pleased sigh leaving your lips at the friction that your pussy had been so desperately aching for. You were embarrassed when you realized that you were so wet that your pussy was making noises as you did so and that realization made your cheeks burn red. You hid your face by looking out the window, halting your motions.

“Bad girl,” Jeonghan chided, barely missing a beat. “Are you embarrassed? You shouldn’t be. You sound so pretty. So fuckable.”

You risked a glance back over at Jeonghan, but his eyes were still on the road.

“Push another finger in yourself.”

You did as he wanted, but as you did, you heard the wet sound once again. You stilled your fingers again, whining slightly.

“I’m going to pull over this car in three minutes,” Jeonghan mumbled. You were shocked by his words, and looked over at him, despite how embarrassed you were to have your fingers half in your body, so easy to gaze at in such a vulnerable state. “If your pussy can’t handle three of my fingers, pushed deep inside of you… Then I’ll turn the car back on and I’ll take us to our friends right from there.”

You didn’t have to wait for him to tell you what would happen if three of his fingers could fit.

You eagerly pushed your two fingers back inside of you, ignoring the fact that you could still hear the sound of your fingers sliding in and out of you. You rationalized that Jeonghan had seen you naked before… He had literally been inside of you before. You knew that despite your jitters, he had already been with you at your most vulnerable.

You were unashamed as small moans started to leave your lips and you were finally able to slip a third finger into your body.

There was a small stretch, and your chest was heaving up and down as you panted- not at actually fucking yourself on your fingers, but from the thought that soon enough you would finally have Jeonghan’s cock on inside of you again.

You pushed your fingers deep inside of you, scissoring the three in and out of you. You couldn’t help the whimpers that left your mouth at the stretch, the faint breaths that sounded reminiscent of Jeonghan’s name.

“Take it easy love,” Jeonghan murmured. You noticed him glancing at you for the first time since you had started touching yourself, and his reaction made you bite back an even louder moan. His eyes quickly shot back to the road and his fingers tightened around the steering wheel.

He cleared his throat and shifted in his seat, which of course was when you noticed the tent in his pants.

“You’re gonna take my cock well, I can tell,” he said, his voice gruff.

You glanced at the time, noting that it had only been a few minutes since you started but… You couldn’t wait anymore for Jeonghan to touch you. You had been aching for his cock since the moment he came in you during New Years.

You wanted him and you wanted him now.

“Please Jeonghan, I need you right now,” you mumbled. You risked a glance at the road, noting that it was barren. You weren’t sure what road Jeonghan was driving on, but it was somewhere dark, on some one lane road, with fields on either side. You reached over to him and began to unbuckle his pants despite his protests.

You felt him slowing the car down, but he didn’t stop it.

“Do you know how-”

Before he could finish you gave his rock-hard cock two strong strokes and sucked the tip of his cock into your mouth.

“Oh my god I missed your cock,” you admitted shamelessly. You sucked more of his cock into your mouth and moaned around his length. You heard a small gasp leave his mouth.

“Do you even know how dangerous this is?” Jeonghan practically growled. You suddenly felt a sharp pain on your ass, the sound of skin on skin ringing out along with it, and you cried out, practically gagging around Jeonghan’s fat cock when you did.

Had he just…?

“Sucking my cock while I’m driving? Do you know how distracted that makes me? I could crash the car… Is that what you want?”

You felt a little ashamed at having distracted Jeonghan like that, but before you could say anything Jeonghan slid his hand down the curve of your ass and pushed his fingers into your body. You moaned again.

“But honestly… I had been hoping you would,” he admitted. “You took the bait so well.”

You felt the car slowing down to a stop and once the cars gears were put into park Jeonghan’s fingers left your body and suddenly his fingers were buried into your hair. It took him a moment to get beneath your roots considering the tight braids that he had made earlier, but before long you could feel those braids coming undone under his grasp.

You were dragged off of Jeonghan’s cock, up to his eyeline. He didn’t say anything. He just waved his wet fingers in your face.

“Taste yourself.”

You leaned forward, and wrapped your lips around Jeonghan’s fingers, licking your salty fluids right off of his wet fingers. As a reward for that immediate action Jeonghan pulled his fingers from your mouth and replaced it with a soft kiss on your lips. You melted under his touch, only feeling your arousal amping at the touch.

“Get into the backseat,” he murmured.

You didn’t have to be told twice. You scrambled into the back seat, quickly peeling your shirt off of your body as you did so. You fumbled with the hook of your bra until you could slide it off of your shoulders. You were quick to spread your legs in the backseat, staring desperately at Jeonghan.

“Hurry up, please, fucking hurry up,” you insisted. “God, what are they going to say if it takes us an hour to make a twenty-minute trip down the road?”

Jeonghan laughed at your words, slowly stripping his own shirt from his body.

“That’s what you’re worried about?” He asked with a chuckle. “Joshua still thinking that you’re the innocent best friend he thinks you are?”

“Joshua-”

“Joshua should know what you really are.”

Jeonghan made his way into the back seat, his cock hanging heavy between his legs. You swallowed hard, unable to believe that you were going to do this again. You were really going to be fucked by Jeonghan a second time… And even worse you were practically salivating at the thought.

Jeonghan took the base of his cock in his hand and lined to up between your legs, his tip twitching against your entrance. He propped himself sloppily in the back of the car, his hand pressed behind your head.

“A dirty little whore.”

He sunk himself into you without warning and it ripped a moan from your mouth. You wrapped your legs around Jeonghan’s waist, drawing him closer to your body. In addition to that you wrapped your arms around his body, your fingers digging into Jeonghan’s arms.

“My dirty little whore.”

You rolled your eyes at his words, but even as you did so your pussy clamped around his cock.

“Stop talking,” you mumbled. “Just fuck me Jeonghan. Please, just fuck me.”

Jeonghan laughed, and you figured most days he wouldn’t really appreciate the way that you told him what to do. Maybe if you guys weren’t so desperate to have each other he would have punished you for that… The reminder of his spank earlier echoed through your brain.

This time however, Jeonghan just did what you both wanted so desperately.

He didn’t waste time being slow and sensual. Fucking in the backseat of a car after all wasn’t nearly as fun as people made it out to be. The backseat felt cramped, it got hot fast. You could feel yourself sweat as you whined for Jeonghan to fuck you harder.

For the first time in… Maybe ever you didn’t care how desperate you looked and sounded. You let your fingernails dig into Jeonghan’s back, bucking your hips to meet each one of Jeonghan’s thrusts, making him hit you even deeper.

“Did you miss me?” Jeonghan asked you. You whined, burying your face into Jeonghan’s chest.

“I see you every damn day, how could I miss you?”

Jeonghan laughed, his voice deep.

“Don’t lie to me. I know you did miss me. Missed my thick cock pulsing inside of you,” Jeonghan murmured. “God I could practically see it in your eyes. You wanted me to take you any time that we were together. Sometimes I wonder if you would even care if Joshua were there to watch.”

“Shut up,” you mumbled. But Jeonghan wasn’t really the type to listen to you. That you were reminded of every day. God it was one of the reasons that most days you couldn’t stand him.

“I can’t tell you how many times I want home and had to touch myself in the shower… Watched my cum running down the drain instead of painting your insides with it.”

You threw your head back at the admission.

“I… I touched myself too,” you whined out. “Couldn’t help it, I did miss you. Missed having you inside of me.”

“Fuck,” Jeonghan cursed. “You’re so damn… I wish I had known you were so slutty before. I really would have fucked you ages ago... Would you have liked that? Liked me fucking you every damn day since we first met. I can think of so many places I could have taken you. Oh, the wasted potential. I wonder where all you would let me…”

As Jeonghan spoke he punctuated each sentence with a deep thrust. One that made your toes curl and your breath hitch.

He felt so good, hitting that spot that drove you absolutely crazy with every single thrust. There wasn’t much on your mind, all you could think about was Jeonghan’s cock, and Jeonghan, and how he had acted before.

Earlier when you were being consulted about being single, Jeonghan’s behavior hadn’t made much sense. But knowing that he had been thinking so much about you… Wishing he could have you beneath him again had you suddenly realizing why he may have been so careless around your friends that day.

“Jeonghan,” you stammered out, barely able to squeak as he bounced you on his cock. He hummed, his fingers raising up to tweak at your tits, sending a whole other sudden wave of pleasure through your body. “Jeonghan, e-earlier, when we were talking about me going on a date-”

Before the words had even completely left your lips, Jeonghan had growled a bit, making you yelp as he started to speed up his thrusts.

“You want to have a conversation now?” He mumbled. “I think we’re in the middle of something…”

“You were jealous, weren’t you?” A small smirk crossing over your lips before it was utterly whipped of by Jeonghan pushing two fingers between your lips. You moaned around them, letting your eyes flutter shut.

“You really do talk too much,” he mumbled. “You don’t even think before you open that mouth do you? Why do I need to be jealous? No matter who that date is, there’s no way that he will ever match up to me.” His fingers dragged themselves out of your mouth so that he could hear the heavy moans that were leaving your lips.

“I mean listen to yourself,” he stated. “You sound like you haven’t felt pleasure a day in your life. Are you telling me that any other man could make you feel this good?”

Jeonghan’s hand trailed down your chin and settled itself on your throat. He raised an eyebrow when your breath hitched.

“God, you really are a whore, do you want me to choke you?”

You felt your orgasm approaching faster and faster. You whined, and went to thrust up again, but before you could manage it, Jeonghan pressed your torso down with his other hand. It just made his cock drive deeper inside of you.

“Say it, I want you begging for my fingers choking the air from your throat while I use your pretty little cunt the way it wants so badly,” he whispered. You whined.

“Jeonghan,” you insisted. “Please, I-I only want you, I’ve only been thinking about you, need you to use me, want you to choke me, please Jeonghan I-”

Before you could continue Jeonghan’s fingers tightened around your throat and you felt yourself cumming hard once again. You wanted so badly to be in control of Jeonghan’s cock as it drove in and out of you, but his hand held you firm in place, so all you could do was quiver beneath him.

“That’s my good girl,” he murmured. His thrusts started to slow down despite the fact that he hadn’t yet cum, and it sent a small panic through your body.

“Fuck Jeonghan wait,” you mumbled. Your fingers dug deeper into his skin and you pulled his chest down against yours. He seemed surprised by the action but his fingers loosened around your neck and he shifted to wrap his arms around your back. “You have to cum, please cum in me. I need your cum, I’ve missed it so much. I have to have it inside of me. Please Jeonghan you can’t not fill me with your cum you can’t.”

Your lips brushed against Jeonghan’s and the moment that you did, he sucked your bottom lip into his mouth and gnawed lightly on it.

“You want…” He trailed off as he pressed his lips fully onto yours, swallowing your desperate moans (And mixing in some of his own). “You want my cum that badly?”

“Yes, please-” You started to beg incoherently, your words slurring you were so desperate just for Jeonghan to make you feel full again. Before you could even finish speaking Jeonghan collapsed against you, his cock unloading itself into you. All you could do was whine and shake under him, just taking all that he had to give you. Once the last drop of his semen had filled you, Jeonghan placed his forehead against yours.

“Jesus Christ, the things you do to me.”

You could barely think straight, so instead of replying coherently you just mumbled a weak: “Language” and let your eyes flutter shut.

Suddenly, you didn’t care how long it took for Jeonghan and you to arrive to the others. You two could make up whatever excuse you wanted, no one would ever assume that you two had stopped briefly to fuck. Who cared?

But after a minute of you two catching your breaths, Jeonghan sucked in a breath and slowly slipped his cock from your body.

You whined when you lost the contact, feeling the cum in your body threaten to spill out, but before it could Jeonghan kissed his way down your torso. His kisses cooled down the burn of your skin, only making you feel that much more soothed before he arrived at his apparent destination…

He whistled as he gazed at your gaping entrance, his thumbs settling momentarily on your thighs to help him ease his viewing pleasure.

“Oh, I wish you could see this. How fucking wrecked your pussy looks,” he mumbled. “If I had the time… I’d fuck you again and again and again.”

He reached forward spreading your pussy lips further open with his fingers. He didn’t waste long before leaning forward and pushing his tongue into your hole. You whined again at how sensitive you felt. His very touch felt so good, but also hurt so much after having just been fucked so hard by Jeonghan.

Still you didn’t argue at all as he slowly began to fuck you with his tongue, slowly coaxing each drop of his cum out of your pussy.

“Don’t want you to have any… Problems while we are at the movie,” he cooed in-between each lick. You let your head roll back and started to pant a little again. That made Jeonghan smile against your pussy.

“What’s wrong baby? You started to get turned on again?” He asked. “I almost forgot how horny you truly are. You really want me, don’t you?”

“You’re practically fucking me on your tongue,” you whined. “What am I supposed to do, just not get turned on?”

Jeonghan laughed, and his voice vibrated against you only making it harder not to get more and more turned on. You didn’t ask for permission this time, you reached forward, tangling your fingers in his hair, sighing in relief at being able to touch him.

He didn’t tell you off for it, just smiled and continued to sloppily eat you out.

Despite how sensitive you were, it didn’t take long for you to feel a second orgasm approaching. Jeonghan seemed beyond excited for this. He slid a single finger into you with that to probe at your sweet spot and soon you were coming unraveled beneath him, bucking your hips into his mouth, his name a cry on your lips.

Once your breathing had gone back to a slow regular beat Jeonghan pulled back and sighed, giving your clit a fleeting kiss.

“Good girl,” he mumbled. “Cumming for me twice.”

He leaned back and reached around to grab his tshirt. You watched him in silence for a moment, still fighting to regain mobility to your limbs. Then you sat up and tried to look out the window. You couldn’t do so; it was so fogged up from both of your hot breaths.

You felt a blush crawl up your neck to your cheeks. You tried to hide it by reaching for your bra.

“You sure you want to go to the movie?” Jeonghan asked after a moment of silence between you two. You looked over at him, your head falling to the side as you resecured your shirt over your chest.

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I?”

He gestured between you two.

“We did just fuck,” he stated. “And…. It wasn’t really gentle. Hate for someone to point out that you were walking funny or something.”

Again you were taken aback by how caring Jeonghan was being about the whole situation. For someone who most of the time came off as not caring about you in any way, you genuinely couldn’t believe he was being so considerate about your image, and your feelings.

You would think he would just be happy he had gotten his dick wet, after all he had never had the best track record with girls. You had always assumed he was careless when he fucked those girls and didn’t call them back. Then again, he had, in essence called you back.

What did that even mean?

Jeonghan interrupted your thoughts by reaching forward and hitting you on the forehead. You grunted and shot him a glare.

“Well? Should I take you home and make up some story or what?”

You grabbed your underwear and slipped it back onto your body, sticking your tongue out at Jeonghan.

“Shut up, I’m going. I’m not going to be walking funny you’re not that big.”

Jeonghan snickered and left you in the back to slide your pants back on while he started the car back up.

It wasn’t long before you got back to your friends, and Joshua was the first to greet you guys. He smiled widely and waved you over.

“That took you guys forever. What took so long?” You rolled your eyes.

“Dumbass got lost,” you mumbled, gesturing towards Jeonghan who had his hands buried into his pocket.

“It would have been easier without her squawking in my hear the whole way there. Last time I drive you anywhere.”

You rolled your eyes and looked at Joshua with an exasperated expression. One that he ate like candy.

“God sometimes you two really do surprise me,” Joshua mumbled softly. “You know, for a second there I thought that you two could actually get along.”

You let your eyes drift over to Jeonghan and you both caught one anothers gaze. Your mind drifted back to the events of not long ago, to the stretch of Jeonghan’s cock as-

“As if we could ever,” Jeonghan stated with a laugh. You snapped out of your thoughts and looked over at Joshua.

“Enough talk let’s get to that movie.”

You were settling down into the theatre and you ended up next to Jeonghan.

You weren’t sure how, but neither of you complained about it at all. No one mentioned it so you guys just all sort of acted like everything was normal. Joshua was next to you, and with him was Mina and as the movie theatre’s lights turned down, you settled rather comfortably into your seat.

You had, of course, every intention to pay attention to the movie in front of you. After all, you didn’t pay twelve dollars a ticket just to not pay attention to what was going on.

Even so, you realized quickly that there wouldn’t be much paying attention going on, when Jeonghan suddenly reached over and set his hand on your knee.

You looked over at him in alarm.

You guys had just finished fucking, was he really not satisfied?

You couldn’t really deny the fact that you were already craving for more however. How could you when having Jeonghan deep inside of you was practically all you could think about when you were grabbing snacks?

But still, this was ridiculous. Were you two really just as horny as high school students?

“Is this okay?” Jeonghan whispered to you, hi warm breath tickling your ear. You looked at him, and then over at Joshua who was perfectly focused on the movie.

“Yeah just… Don’t let Joshua catch us,” you mumbled back quietly. The grin on Jeonghan’s face almost made you regret agreeing.

Despite the fact that his movements were slow and deliberate, you weren’t even listening to the words of the movie playing in the theatre. Your thoughts were only on Jeonghan as he slowly drug his finger tips over your legs.

He leaned in closer to you, his mouth brushing the skin of your neck. He chuckled at the way your breath hitched at that.

“I really don’t know how you managed to stay single for so long,” he mumbled softly. You crooned your head a little bit, distracted slightly by his words and what he could possibly mean. “After all, you’re such a good fuck. You take my cock like a pro-”

His fingers slid into your underwear, feeling how soaked they already were just from the little bit he had been touching you. He suppressed a quiet moan in the crook of your neck.

“You’re always so perfectly wet for me, and your little exhibitionist kink is a little bit of a turn on too,” he mumbled.

“I don’t have-” Jeonghan pushed a finger into you, making you bite back a surprised moan. You looked over, and Joshua wasn’t looking at you at all, and didn’t seem to suspect a thing. Even so, you took off your jacket and laid it in your lap to make the whole situation a little less… Obvious. “I don’t have an exhibitionist kink Jeonghan.”

Jeonghan chuckled at your words.

“Don’t tell me you can’t feel how turned on you are?” He whispered. He pressed a kiss to your body, seeming utterly fascinated by the marks he had left on your skin before. “And of all the places we end up doing… This none of them have been… Well, private.”

He lazily drew his finger in and out of you, pushing it as deep as it would go before curling it inside of your body. He was just teasing you really- you knew that. Turning you on so that you would be begging for him to fuck you before the movie was even over.

“That’s not my fault, I didn’t ask you to fuck me there,” you mumbled. Jeonghan snorted.

“Actually, if I remember right, you did exactly that,” he said. You pinched Jeonghan’s arm, and in response he pushed a second finger into you. “And your pussy is an excellent reminder of what you said then. Your pussy isn’t nearly as tight after I’ve given it what it wants now is it?”

You turned your head in to Jeonghan’s hair, trying night to moan as his thumb came out to clumsily mess with your clit.

“When did you become so vulgar?” You were able to bite out. Your voice had risen a little louder but you somehow managed to bring it back down. He hummed against you.

“When I’m around you darling I just can’t help myself. I want everyone to know how dirty and wet you are for me all the time,” he mumbled. You turned your head away from Jeonghan, and it was then that Joshua glanced over at you.

He pointed at the characters on screen, an amused expression on his face.

“Dude, this movie is just as good as everyone keeps saying it is,” he stated with a laugh. You smiled back at him, wishing that Jeonghan would stop fingering you while Joshua was talking, but all he did was move his head off of you as if he had never been there at all, and pushed a third finger into you.

“I can’t believe we are finally getting to see it,” you agreed in a hushed whisper, surprised by how well you were able to keep your face straight when Jeonghan was doing his damndest to make you squeak and moan, and cum for him.

And you were getting close. You could feel the pressure of an orgasm coiling in the pits of your stomach while you waited for Joshua to just look away already.

Jeonghan leaned in towards you again, but not too close as Joshua was whispering away again about something that was happening in the movie.

“What’s wrong dear, are you going to cum? While Joshua is watching nonetheless?” He asked you. You gritted your teeth and squeezed your thighs tighter together, hoping to god that you would be able to hold back. Your eyes wander down to the empty popcorn bucket in Joshua’s hands and your eyes lit up.

“There are free popcorn refills with that bucket, right?” You whispered. “Let me grab you more popcorn!”

You grabbed the bucket, shot Joshua one last smile and rushed off before either boy could say a word.

Finally, you got out into the hallway of the theatre, which was practically desolate of people. You pressed your back up against the hall wall and tried desperately to will yourself back down from the orgasm you had been so close to having.

You weren’t standing there long before Jeonghan came up beside you, his lips suddenly roughly possessing yours. You whined against him and he grabbed your wrist, making you drop Joshua’s bowl of popcorn.

“The bathroom. Right now. Next movie doesn’t get out for another twenty minutes. Yes or no?” He mumbled against your lips.

“Do you even have to ask?” You responded.

Jeonghan snickered against your lips as he dragged you across the hall into the nearest bathroom. He lifted you up by your thighs, setting you on the bathroom counter, pushing your underwear to the side as he fumbled to get his pants off. You propped your feet up on the counter.

“Fuck, this is so unsanitary,” you mumbled. He took your hips under his grasp and pushed his cock deep into your body. You gasped, your hand falling back on the sink faucet in surprise.

“Oh, sorry, were you saying something?” He teased lightly. You wrapped your legs around him and went to protest again before he slid his cock out of your body, until only his tip was buried between your folds. He moved one of his hands a little bit, his thumb rubbing circles into the skin just above your belly button.

“Fuck, okay, fine,” you blurted. “Just fuck me before Joshua gets suspicious.”

Jeonghan snickered at your words and this time, neither of you lasted long. Despite your uncomfortable position and the fact that you had already cum twice that day, it only took you six minutes to cum around Jeonghan’s cock, and your orgasm dragged Jeonghan into another one as well. One that he finished by burying himself deep into you.

This time instead of eating it out of you he thrust a few more times inside of you, pushing his cum around inside of you. You whined, letting your head fall back against the mirror.

“How many showers do I have to take to get this mess off of me?” You asked him. He laughed, and as he fought to catch his breath post his own orgasm he had his face buried in your neck once again. You were honestly starting to love the feeling of his warm breath on your collarbone.

“Maybe make it a shower with holy water,” he snickered. You shifted your grip on him trying to nudge him off of you. He whined at the action and tightened his grip on you. “Ten more minutes.”

You rolled your eyes.

“God, you’re so annoying,” you mumbled. “I have to get popcorn. Maybe if you wanted to cuddle you should try and fuck me somewhere other than a public bathroom.”

Jeonghan slid away from you, his cock slipping out of you. You tried not to whine too much at that, knowing it would just give Jeonghan the incentive to do more.

“You just like fucking in places we can get caught so badly that I feel obligated to please you so,” he teased right back. You rolld your eyes, deciding you needed to just ignore him again. You got down from the counter, trying to make yourself look presentable again.

“If I have to fix my hair one more time…” You mumbled. He sighed, and turned over to you, his fingers once again getting lost in your strands. You grunted your protests as he quickly pulled your hair back into the braids that he had done the first time (and you had managed to replicate the second time).

Of course, you had to admit… You liked it better when Jeonghan was the one braiding your hair, and this time, doing it while in front of a mirror gave you the opportunity to look at Jeonghan while he did it.

Was it weird that you kind of liked the way he was looking at you? His expression gentle, and his touch feather-light. You kind of wondered, for just a fleeting moment if it would really be that bad to like Jeonghan. After all, you were sure some bone in his body had to be nice.

He clearly had it in him to be caring too and if that was so, then maybe-

“Now, hurry up,” he murmured. “You go get the popcorn and get back to the theatre. Don’t take too long or Joshua might think something is up.”

He chuckled softly and patted your head. He looked at your reflection one more time, and then, seeming to find it satisfactory, he turned away.

He started to walk out of the room, only to stop at the door and look back at you.

“We’re going to do this a lot more,” he promised. “You’re too good to let slip between my fingers any longer.”

He left before the red blush he had created even had the chance to creep across your cheeks, but you had a good feeling that he knew it grew there anyways. And you also had a feeling that you despite your feelings in the past, you wouldn’t be turning Jeonghan away at all in the near future to come.

Part three

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Humans Are Space Orcs, “The Press.”

I have been wanting to do this for a while. Commander Vir deals with fame, and the good and bad parts of it. I hope you like, sorry I am so late today :) 

“Why exactly am I back on earth? My tour doesn’t end for another six months, and we were just getting ready for our first exploratory mission since before the burg war.”

“Look, commander, I understand this isn’t what you thought you were signing up for, but since the movie dropped recruitment has Gone up 45% and another 20% after merchandising, we need to get on this quick,”

He sighed 

“Besides, you will only be touring one or two weeks. That’s one or two weeks paid vacation while you talk to celebrities, pose for pictures, and maybe do a press conference or two. Bring along a couple of friends to keep you company and it won’t be that bad.”

“Alright, alright, I get it, but I’m not a dancing monkey. I didn’t sign up for this, and it’s not going to becoming a thin.”

“Yes commander, now The UNSC is taking you first. You are their poster child after all, and they want your face on the recruiting posters .”

“Very well, ma’am.”

***

Wednesday, June 3

“This is good work commander, but we are going to bring in an expert to make it just right.”

Commander Vir stood in an empty hanger bay surrounded by reflective panels, directional lights and a multitude of camera equipment. Sunny and Krill were playing a guessing game he had taught them earlier in the day to keep them occupied, and Waffles -- his dog -- was curled up by one of the set technicians taking a nap.

“An expert?”

“Yes, we’re bringing in one of the guys who used to be a guard in Arlington. The uniform looks good, but is it perfect?”

The answer to that question was answered simply few minutes later

He was a slob, a big fat slob who didn’t know how to properly wear his socks. The guy even whipped out a tape measure to determine the exact distance that a pin should be placed from the crease in his collar.

Commander Vir didn’t see the difference on the small scale, but in aggregate, he found that the difference was actually quite startling. He blinked, “Wow.”

“Excellent, now, we’re going to have you stand over here while we adjust the lights, and then when we give you the cue we want you to follow the order to a T. We will have parade rest attention, present at attention and then contemplatively looking off into the distance. We will have someone with a marker to tell you where to look.”

“Stare contemplatively off into the distance. I don’t remember learning that one.”

“Ahh we got a smartass.” 

He stepped into place doing as the cameraman ordered, trying to look serious and imposing as directed, though Sunny and Krill had decided to make faces in the background. He actually did loose it at some point as Sunny started doing some weird improvised dancing in the background while krill stood there like it offended his sensibilities.

Eventually they got what he wanted, and they showed him some of the prototypes.

There were a few that he liked but only because they looked like vintage  movie posters from some badass naval war movie.

Thursday, June 4 

The three of them walked into the studio watching as bodies flowed past them hurrying off in all directions. Obviously their presence caused quite a stir, and Adam thought he recognized a few faces peering from the crowd, other movies stars and celebrities, but he couldn't be sure what he was seeing. And then there were the women, and men who hurried about, tall, statuesque like greek gods given life, with jaws so sharp they could cut paper, and pouty lips under wide dark eyes. 

Looking at them and then at himself, well, he felt like a dump truck next to a sports car.

Sunny on the other hand didn’t seem impressed, “I could snap them in half…. Like twigs.”

“Fighting isn’t the point Sunny, they’re just supposed to be hot.”

Krill eyed them, “Their single job is to profess the perfect mating standard?”

“Ur yeah, I guess.”

Krill snorted, Sunny shook her head ,’ What is the point of being hot if you’re also useless besides you don’t look all that different.”

He rolled his eyes. Leave it to an alien not to be able to tell what super hot humans looked like.

“I’m serious,” Sunny insisted, “You’re as tall as most of them, and more muscular than some of them, and you have a cool eye patch, so that means you win.”

He couldn’t help but smile shaking his head, “Alright, Alright, I’ll shut up.”

At that moment a woman appeared from nowhere and held out a hand, “Commander! So glad you could come, so glad.” She looked him up and down with a frown.”

“That bad huh?”

“Nothing a little wardrobe and makeup can’t fix.” She announced clapping her hands together and motioning others over as he frowned.

He frowned.

“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing “

“Do I tell you how to do your job commander, no, now over to wardrobe .”

He blinked in surprise, “Ok, yes ma’am.”

He found himself sidling over to where racks and racks of clothing was hanging suddenly surrounded by the tall, statuesque people with their big eyes and pouty lips. While they were busy looking hot, he got nervous and nearly knocked over an entire rack of clothing, blushed till he was beat red, and then decided after this was all over he was going to bury himself under a rock and die.

He was mostly ignored for like twenty minutes until someone walked over, “Commander,” He was a portly little man with hair dyed frost white though his roots were growing in black. The man grabbed him by the hand and dragged him across the room, “Alright, alright, what do we have.”

He looked him over prodding t his shoulders and arms, making him turn in a circle, “Not bad, not bad at all. I can work with this. Tell me commander formal, or casual.”

“Uh casual?”

“Exactly what I was thinking! The provincial small town man feel. I like it.”

“Well I mean ok…” the little man grabbed him aggressively by the arm and pulled him around to a rack of clothing. In the end he had a pair of jeans black boots a black T-shirt and a brown leather jacket.

He frowned, “I hate to point this out, but this is literally what I am wearing.”

“No it isn’t. Yours is frumpy and sloppy and ours will make you look acceptably rugged.”

He frowned not sure if he was supposed to be offended or not, “And where am I supposed to change.”

“Right here.”

“Right here!’

“Commander, these are models, they show their bodies off for a living, none of them need a changing room, so take a leaf out of their book and stop worrying.”

This was worse than a high school locker room. Humans had never reached light speed, but he was pretty sure he at least broke the sound barrier while pulling on the new pants.

When he walked back over pulling on his jacket sunny and Krill had made themselves comfortable in a couple of the stage crew chairs, “What are you so nervous about, you looked fine.” Sonny said looking down at her implants to change music.

“You were watching me>”

“Was I not supposed to do that.” 

He felt himself turn a nice shade of cherry red, “No!.”

She shrugged, “Whatever.” 

Krill just shook his head, “You forget that neither of us wear clothes, so we do not understand your issues.”

He sighed, “Nudists.” He muttered walking towards the set, though he was immediately diverted by another person who led him over to a set of chairs and mirrors. He was pushed down into a seat and spun around and an aggressive group of stylists moved in on him. This is honestly not what he had expected when he joined the army.

He was even less impressed when they started to stick brushes in his face causing him to blink and his eyes to itch. Someone wetted down his hair and put product in it that smelled like strawberries, which, honestly he wasn’t entirely annoyed about.

From there he was finally let go and walked onto another photo set, though this one had way more lightning, way more cameras and way more props.

And of course like the awesome badass commander that he was, he stood there like a complete idiot as stiff as a board, caught like a deer in the headlights. The photographer seemed more than a little annoyed at his inability to look like anything other than sasquatch caught on a hunting camera.

“Relax.”

“This is kind of out of my element.”

“Being capture by aliens and going on space walks where you might suffocate, and you cant relax enough to take a picture.”

“To be fair, no one sees me when I am doing badass stuff, so I don’t have the social pressure of preforming well.”

They tried some more.

They told him he was smiling awkwardly, or like he was being threatened at gunpoint.

It wasn’t until Sunny started doing stupid dances behind the camera-man, again that the photographer finally started to like what he was seeing. Every time he turned to look at what Vir was smiling at, Sunny would stop dancing trying to look all innocent.

That just made him laugh.

At some point one of the people had a great idea to involve waffles, and -- like the good girl that she was -- she promptly stole the spotlight, which he was totally cool with.

Photoshoots were definitely not his thing.

He was about 100 percent sure when the photos came out they would look like his last middle school yearbook picture.

Even thinking about it made him grimace.

Friday, June 5

“And please help me to welcome our next special guest, Commander Adam Vir of the UNSC.”

His legs felt like jelly, and it took sunny nudging him to finally get him moving onto the stage. He wondered if people could tell just how bad his legs were shaking.

And there was a twitching going on in his right cheek that he just couldn't stop.

He wanted to go back to the hotel and watch dumb TV With Sunny while krill complained about the medical inaccuracies.

But here he was listening to clapping and cheering from an assembled studio crowd. He was sure he was going to do something massively stupid, like trip off the stage, or rip his pants or forget his own name, or something.

The host stood up, he was blanking on their name right now though he knew they were ridiculously famous.

He shook hands with them.

“So glad you could come commander.”

“A pleasure to be here.” He responded robotically hoping that his smile was at least somewhat convincing.”

He took a seat on the couch, resting a hand against his shaking right leg.

He was going to puke.

“So, i Heard you have been on tour  for the past two days, how are you enjoying the celebrity circuit.”

He rubbed his hands against his legs, “Do you want the real answer or the fake one?”

“Lets hear the real one.”

“Er, well it turns out I am really bad at…. Pretty much everything that’s not captaining a ship. Yesterday I did a photoshooot where I am ninety percent sure I looked like an awkward cryptid most of the time. People are going to be looking at those photos and wondering in what swamp they found me.” 

There was laughter from the crowd.

He wasn’t entirely sure if that was funny or not.

“I am sure they aren’t as bad as all that.”

He shook his head, “Pretty sure my face was like this…” He raised his hands making a wide-eyed shocked expression that had the crowd laughing again.”

The host smiled, “Commander, Forgive me for asking, but how old are you.”

He smiled sheepishly, “Um, lets just say too young and leave it at that.”

“I was sort of under the impression that commanders and admirals were….”

“Old wrinkly dudes?”

“Yeah.” 

He rubbed the back of his head, “That’s mostly true, the reason I got this position has to do with my experience with extra terrestrials.”

“I’ve heard rumors that you have aliens on board your ship. Is that true.”

“Those shouldn’t be rumors, that is entirely true. We have a twenty….three person Drev clan, a Vrul medical officer, a starborn, and some miscellaneous others.”

A muttering from the crowd, “But you were part of the Drev war, and Operation Steel eye. How did an entire Drev clan end up on your ship?”

He shrugged, “The story is complicated, but the long and short of it is, I made friends with some Drev after the war, and they adopted me into the clan.”

“Can we…. See, the prosthetic I mean” He held up his hands, “Not to be disrespectful.”

He shrugged, “sure.” Reaching down and tugging up his pant leg so the bright blue carapace glittered in the bright studio lights.

The man leaned closer, “Wow…. What…. What is that?”

“Drev carapace.” He dropped the pant leg.

“Why?”

“That is actually the reason I am adopted. A drev has to give you a gift that contains a piece of their own armor, so my best friend made this for me some time ago.” 

They talked about that for a little while. They talked about the war, they talked about his first moment on an alien planet.

“I was actually on the original mission to land on  Proxima b. I was the shuttle pilot behind Captain Kelly, though I don’t know how many people knew that.

There was a murmuring around the room.

“I know it was broadcasted live, but luckily the cameras were pointed away because when I was getting out of the shuttle, my foot slipped on the stairs.” The crowd gasped and giggled, “And I face planted right onto the surface.” 

More laughing.

“That is my legacy, the first man to take a nose dive on an alien planet.”

“I would say that your legacy contains a lot of strange instances. There are reports that you recently escaped from kidnapping by a prodigum by… Singing? How did that work?”

He rubbed the back of his head, “Well that is… that is.” he laughed nervously, “Yes that is a thing that happened. I and my friend Sunny were captured by a criminal overlord for entertainment in his little criminal syndicate. They had cages lined all along the ceiling and inside them were other humans. Turns out the Prodigum react to human singing like a drug, so I was asked to sing, luckily for me one of the woman in the other cage was a voice coach, so a few days of starving and being miserable, she taught me how to sing properly, or a little more properly, and then I sang a super sad song, distracted everyone long enough for y friend to escape and call for help.”

Gasping and more laughter around the room.

“Wow…. Your life….”

“Reads like a strange cartoon doesn’t it.”

From the crowd, “Sing for us!.”

The call was taken up a few more times.

He shook his head, “No no no, no I am not going to sing on international television. I have embarrassed myself enough this week.” 

“You now commander, you wouldn’t want to disappoint the public.”

He could feel the heat rising into his face as the rest of the crowd took up the chant.

He tried to protest, but that didn’t seem to be working.

Eventually he held up his hands “Ok, ok, but if my voice cracks…. Just don’t laugh.”

“And you were without accompaniment.”

He sighed, “Yeah it was a Capella. They didn’t exactly give me a soundtrack.” he stood taking a few deep breaths and humming to himself. His legs were shaking even worse than before.

He rubbed his hands nervously together.

The studio went very quiet.

He felt sweat trickling down his back between his shoulder blades.

He took a deep breath and….

His voice came out loud and clear, though it quivered slightly. He tried to shore it up as he continued, taking deeper breaths trying to get more control. He tried to find that place where he had been back in the cage. The sort of hopeless anguish he had tried to convey. His voice did quake a few times, but he was ok with that.

At least he didn’t do something super stupid like fall off the stage.

He cut it off hallway because his legs were shaking so bad, he thought that any worse might cause him to fall over.

The crowd began to clap as he collapsed back into his seat taking a deep breath.

“Wow, that is pretty impressive for someone who says they don’t sing. Bet the person who wrote that didn’t think it would be used to escape alien kidnappers.”

“Whatever it was, it worked. But” he lifted his hand, “I’m shaking so bad right now.”

The man shook his head, “That form someone who doesn’t shake when he flies jets at thousands of miles per hour.”

He smiled, “The jet isn’t going to judge me if my voice cracks. I think you will find aliens and airplanes are a lot less scary than humans. Don’t get me wrong humans are great , you guys just scare me half to death.” 

Saturday, June 6

A flight demonstration over the beach, which was pretty good 

Sunday, June 7

Dinner with a few important famous people

Monday, June 8 

Dinner with some politicians.

Tuesday, June 9 

He visited some UNSC bases up and down  the western coastline talking to servicemen and visiting some other people

Wednesday June, 10

The magazines came out, and they actually managed to make him look pretty good to his surprise,  though he was pretty sure the picture had been taking while Sunny was doing something with her hips that Drev hips had not been designed for, which eventually made him laugh so hard he had choked.

Thursday, June 11

This was his last day, and he had one more press conference to attend, than he could go home. He was wearing his formal uniform, captain’s cap, cords, gloves and everything else. There were at least ten microphones on the lectern in front of him, and a crowd of reporters below. Lights blinded his eyes.

Behind his back, the UNSC flag outlined him in bright blue. 

He was getting ready for more questions about the Burg war or wearing the steel eye armor.

He nodded to one of the reporters in the front.

“Commander, do you want to explain to us why, on UNSC time you were  reported as supporting an LFIL protest when you were supposed to be acting as neutral crowd control.”

He felt the blood drain right out of his face.

He was not ready for this.

Inside his brain went blank. He stammered for a second, suddenly feeling like a little kid giving a class presentation while all eyes stared at him. More cameras flashed, “I…. I was doing what I thought…. Needed to be done to keep the protest civil.”

“That was not your job!”

More yelling until the crowd was shushed, “Look, the GA wasn’t seeing any of their representative. I simply explained their side of the story to the GA, and they decided to lift the ban on their own.”

“Directly going against the policies of the UNSC was a gross breach of your contract commander, and we are all having a hard time understanding why you have not been disciplined for it.” 

“You have no idea what is on y contract. My job is to foster peace throughout the galaxy, and THAT is what I did.”

“Some people see it as a direct attack on our way of life. You are helping spread disease poor moral values throughout the galaxy.”

He felt his face burning, “What makes you think their relationships have anything to do with you NONE of them live on earth or on Mars. They do not interact with you, they do not bother you, they do not THINK about you. And no they are not spreading disease because every person who leaves earth receives a full disease panel. You are more likely to have communicable diseases than they are.” 

Uproar.

He shouldn't have said that.

“You are spreading extrial propaganda, and now that you are the face of the UNSC you are having an impact on our children, so t is your duty to uphold the values of the Human public.”

His hands were gripping white onto the lectern, “It is my job to uphold MY values and if the UNSC doesn’t like what I am doing they will fire me, so that is none of your concern.”

“Commander Vir, are you an extrail.”

The room went very silent suddenly. His heart was hammering in his chest.

“You are out of line. My personal life whatever it may entail has no bearing on my work, so you will either ask me professional questions or we are done here.”

“But you haven't denied it!” Someone else shouted.

“That question doesn't deserve an answer either way. If i tell you, that means I am justifying myself to you, which I have no desire to do, and if I were to confirm the other way, I would be bringing a personal issue into a political light, which would also be inappropriate. Either way I will not answer you. Unless there are any more questions that involve my work and not my personal life…”

He wouldn’t budge forcing them to change the subject.

His hands were shaking again, but this time it was out of anger. He had to breathe very slowly to keep himself calm enough.

***

Headlines 

Commander Vir Extrail or Normal 

SCANDAL: UNSC’s Golden boy involved with aliens?

Press conference turns to barbed comments.

LFIL Propaganda

[alias-b]

sins of my youth. 020

Billy Hargrove x OC! Evie Fenny~ Also posted to my AO3

Summary: It was common knowledge that Billy Hargrove hated Hawkins. Hated Cherry Lane. Even loathed the strange girl next door. Evie Fenny wasn’t too fond of the chaotic Cali transfer either. An awful high school tradition sparks a chain of events that changes everything, ultimately bringing two frayed souls together.

A/N: Hello everyone. Thanks for clicking in to read. Billy and Evie continue to explore their new relationship together. Max's fourteenth birthday party marks a change for the teens, reminding them that danger isn't too far off. TW: Neil being Neil. Mentions of abuse. Something close to an almost assault/abduction off screen near the end. Light mentions of Pica & fatphobia. Sexual themes

***My tag list is wide open, just shoot me a msg to join it! Chat with me about the chapter if you have the time! Enjoy! xoxo 

Chapter 20: Rose Tint My World

  “Hold still, I’ll poke your eye again.”

   “I can’t breathe, you’re killing me.” Came a sniffled whine.

   “Such a baby. You asked.”

   “I said I was curious after you put the gunk on my nails!”

   “That gunk was a great color on you. You whine just like your big brother.” Carol had Max’s face clamped in her grip as she applied mascara. “Don’t blink, you'll smear it.”

   “Evie, she’s killing me,” Max lamented aloud. “This is not worth it.” Evie just laughed, setting a bowl of pretzels aside. Carol flicked a mirror up to let Max see her handiwork. “Whoa...It’s not terrible.” She gruffed in a mumble, tilting her head to see each angle. "Kinda like Madonna."

   “I’ll take it.” Carol stole some M&Ms from another dish as they shared a spot on Heather’s fuzzy carpet. A movie rolled on in the corner TV.

   Max about howled when Heather came in from the bathroom, face covered in green.

   “Monster!”

   “It’s a face-mask!” Heather planted her hands on her hips, prompting more laughter. “You’ll be more into them once your body really changes.”

   “Girls are way scarier than boys.” Max poked at her blushed cheek which had Carol smacking her hand away. Evie was draped across the bottom of the bed in her robe and nightie, half-watching the TV. “Can you do a zombie make-up?”

   Carol gave a snort.

   “I can do anything. kid.”

   “Eves, you want another piece of pizza?” Heather crossed with the box.

   “I’m so full.” Evie shook her head.

   “You had like one piece.”

   “I ate a big lunch. And lots of pretzels.” Evie snatched the pretzel bowl again for good measure. Truthfully, her appetite had been up and down lately. Mostly down. What with the pangs in her stomach that always passed and… “You sound like my mother.”

   “She was...extra peppy at the salon today. My mom and I got our monthly trim.”

   “Probably some guy she’s seeing, it’ll pass and another will come. Men are like Kleenex to her. Soft, strong, and disposable.” Evie shrugged to pluck up a magazine.

   “Hey,” Max began as Carol fussed over her, “so I didn’t want to make a thing of it, but my mom keeps insisting. My birthday party is coming. She and Neil saved so I could have it just at the roller rink and...they said I could invite whoever I wanted. But, I can’t ask the guys to come. So I figured I’d ask El. She’s really cool. But, maybe if you guys wanted to come? You can bring boys and pretend you’re not even at my party if it’s not your thing. I just-”

   “Max, we’d love to come.” Heather piped up first. “Evie and I rule the rink too.”

   “I look very cute in skates,” Carol agreed with a twitching smirk. “I'm in. I’ll bring Tommy, he sucks and he’ll fall down a bunch. We'll pretend we ran into each other so your stepdad can get the stick out of his ass.”

   “Billy has to go too cause Neil says it’s a family event.” Max turned to Evie. “I think he’d be happier with you there.”

   “I think Billy and I both are fine being there for you. I had my fourteenth at the rink too. It’ll be fun.” Evie beamed, legs up to sway idly. “Plus we haven’t met the Chief’s kid. She’s home-schooled, right?”

   “Yeah, she might be joining us in school next year.” Max stayed still for Carol’s brush. “Depends. She was uh...adopted under weird circumstances. You’ll like her. I taught her how to do that felting thing because of you and she made this funny one of her dad.”

   “I’ll bet Hopper loved that.” Evie winked. 

   “He’s kind of a babe in like a scruffy, rugged way,” Carol remarked. "Strong mountain man type."

   “Ew. He’s so old.” Max reeled back to laugh.

   “I’m just saying! I like a man in uniform. He rocks the khaki.” 

   “The moms in town do eat him up.” Heather shrugged, joining Evie on the bed with a handful of candy. “We all have our strange crushes. I like high cheek-bones. Guys with a little Bowie. Evie? You got one?”

   “Gia Carangi even if she isn’t modeling any more, I love her face.” Evie was flicking pages without looking. Howls from the TV went ignored through the chatter.

   “I called that. Fenny being into ladies. Try Iman.” Carol winked which earned her a look as if she hadn’t planted a kiss on Evie in a fit of rage.

   “People say Billy’s pretty like a girl.” Max had added which got the other girls giggling. 

   “I like this one, we’re so keeping her.” Carol got up to root for a bag of chips, popping them open. “Like the zombie face better?”

   “I still look too pretty.” Max appeared more goth than zombie.

   “You are pretty. Deal with it. We redheads stick together.” Carol stole Evie’s magazine. “Let us know when the party is, we’ll be there.”

   Max looked at the three older girls squished together on Heather’s bed. Chattering and supporting. Happy to have her around.

   A bright smile touched her face for the first time since Neil Hargrove walked into her home. 

** ** ** 

   Most days, all it felt like was floating. Floating through her house. Through Hawkins. Up and down streets. Through school. A stunning illusion she pulled like wool over her dark eyes.

   A woman in rippling silks walking endless halls toward a great, cherry red door at the end, but the door gets farther away and she's thrilled to continue on even still. Feather wings glittering to unfold from her back because heaven's light is beyond the door. Crystalline eyes with their hold. Waiting for her. The sky awaits her with caressing clouds. Opulent gold sun rays and twinkling stars when the world lies down.

   Evie knew she was too big for her wings most days. Too heavy to leave the Earth.

   Knew in her beating heart of hearts that was the first thing people think when they see her. This magnificent soul with drive and neon and talent reduced to a single shrewd glance. And they don't think twice until she's something vaguely sexual. Something marketable you can package and process and sell to the last drop.

   Easier to stomach something uncomely if you can slide into it ruthlessly to rut. They always come like animals, wailing as a banshee would to get off better than they ever will in their small lives. They eat it up. Cover it in sweat and regret and blame.

   These things that hang as little weights on her heartstrings swinging back and forth. They make her not want to attempt extending those wings to fly. Fear of heads shaking in judgement. Fear of looking uglier. More foolish for even trying. Poor thing.

   All because of one glance that couldn't be bothered to see worth in another human life. Sometimes Evie wanted to be skinny not because of beauty, but because she'd get a privilege pass to exist in this world.

   They think she shouldn't dress the way she does. She's probably lazy and self loathing because of added pounds. She has no real aspirations or means to achieve them. Those eyes that watch her eat. That shift away before they decide on another seat because the one open next to her just isn't right. They glare because of the extra room she might take up. Even sharing a few cordial words with fat girls seemed to be a task.

   Evie always notices and does the polite thing pretending she doesn't. She knows what her body looks like, no need to point out the obvious.

   Strange, how these snap judgements, these eyes that don't look twice; can villainize a body utterly. A body. Flesh, bone, and muscle. We're all made in heaven's image. All destined for paths we seek to control. Superiority should have been an illusion. But no, too much or too little, your worth dips low. Fetishes and internalized hatred for things that were shaped and colored differently. Blame.

   But, some days, when the wind soars just right...just strong enough...Evie can spread and illuminate. See the births and deaths of a million stars. Drop the little weights to feel the winds between her fingers. In her curls. In her wings. Feel her feet leave the floor for just a few fleeting seconds.

   The fleeting seconds of soaring always seem so worth it against a world of unsightly aches. Against snap judgements she can toss back to live in a flower petal haze.

   Evie tried hard to live in those moments when they flashed into her. Spotlights. Butterflies delicately landing on her flesh to open and close their stained glass wings for kisses. Evie felt crushed utterly in the most decadent way.

   Billy's soft lips on her neck to get lost in the pulse. Deft fingers that would push up her clothing as he moved in her. Eyes that wanted to see her. All of her. The prayers he could whisper against heating skin.

   A lot could be said about him. But, Billy was always happy to see her and that alone was air spinning into gold. His eyes would light up. Lips twitching. She could hear the single beat that his heart skipped. Even if they didn't speak, they felt this awareness for each other in the vicinity. Truly magic.

   Those eyes. That love of a face. Always staring pointedly to read her up and down. Always plucking the weights from her heart by listening. Always unafraid to touch her. Evie hoped she returned that. She really did.

   Fleeting seconds began to linger between them. Seeping slow and saccharine as fresh pouring honey.

   Sneaking away on walks while he let her hold his hand. Flirtation against school lockers that ended in several 'just one more' kisses. Double dates to the movies with Tommy and Carol. Sitting separately to make out.

   Driving up near Lover’s Lake to kiss in a parked Camaro while the sun laid itself down to sleep. Fumbling playfully to undress and explore. Watching the construction of a coming mall with Slurpees from the gas station. Tongues and lips colored all artificial cherry and strawberry.

   Evie would stretch her wings completely. Let Billy admire them until the world was all satin rose-tinted. She could forget her urges and worries and insecurities. All together. This was fine.

   She was fine. More then fine.

   He so liked to admire her wings. Pleasure crushed in as she moaned. Let his fingers explore contours and notches untouched before. Billy would take those prayers on his lips and drape them over her body. Spell them between fleshy thighs. Pulling more fleeting seconds for himself too.

   They could roll around under sheets and not worry about anything else. Have conversations that always felt silly and wonderful and weighted because they both mattered to someone so ardently. That alone was an ocean both could sink into.

   Something beautiful to behold. The real vision behind the great red door. Your soul mattering.

   Evie was in a bubble with Billy Hargrove. A stupid, dopey look on her face when Mona settled dinner down one evening. Steam rising from a huge pot.

   “Going out later?” Evie began to create sound or she'd be lost. "You colored your hair brown again."

   “Needed another change. Ah, I'm going out just with Karen and Claudia. Dessert and wine night. I asked Susan but that poor thing keeps standing me up. Did you finish Max’s gift for her party?” Mona scooped up huge portions in a bowl that Evie would only be prodding at.

   “Yeah, it’s set. Turned out perfect. She’s not much for jewelry but I think a personalized tie dye shirt will be fun. Might look cool while skateboarding. I also have that goody bag of sweets for her to fill up on we made.” Evie reminded herself to pick up her spoon. Took a few bites.

   “You’re not scarfing it down like usual, you love my crawfish soup.”

   “It’s delicious, I just had a big lunch.” A lie. Evie pressed herself to eat quicker, tearing a piece of fresh bread to chew. Thing was, she wanted to eat. She wanted to eat so badly despite the sickness welling inside her. The heavy ache made it a task. Mona eyed her daughter there. “My stomach's in knots a lot, just school stuff.” 

   “Well, you are a senior.” Mona pushed her own soup around. “I haven’t been around as much as I’d like to be. Just the salon and I met-”

   “I get it.” Evie’s lips spread in a flash, not wanting her mother to finish that sentence. “I’m with friends a lot and I keep busy with my music and the cat. I even wrote a new song.”

   “That’s two this week, you. Strumming along blissfully.” Mona gushed. “Whatever has you all creative and dewy, chase it.” Silverware clicked around and Evie stared at her dish. A broader smile crossed.

   "I will."

   “What’s it called?”

   “Ocean Eyes.” 

   Evie could be pretty transparent in the early stages of a relationship.

   These short weeks in with Billy. Lyrics flooded free. Sometimes he liked to watch her write and strum when they hung out. Trips to the lounge where she worked other nights got him a full show, but not of her original stuff. Songs marched forth.

   “Ocean Eyes.”

   “Cupid and Psyche.”

   “Honey Stardust.”

   “Neon-Tinted Hearts.”

   Rock. Pop. Lush and obscene with her glowing heartstrings. She wrote them for Fredrick too when they got together.

   “Doll Joints.”

   “Lollipop Lolita.”

   “Prince Charming.”

   After dinner, Evie stole a notebook filled with her every sinful lyrical confession of her time with Fredrick Bowers. Burnt it in an empty pot out back until Billy wandered out the back steps of his place. Asking her if she was trying to set the neighborhood on fire.

   “How can I help?” He’d snarked while the sky went all pretty peach fuzz. Evie just laughed and never explained what she’d burnt or why it felt this cathartic to watch the smoke rise toward a falling sun. She figured maybe this was the day she'd stop eating foreign and sharp objects. She could do it. She was happier. Lighter. It had to stop.

   It had to. She couldn't think about this haze shattering, it hurt too deep.

   Billy used the flame to light his cigarette comically and kissed her before inhaling the smoke. 

   “Can we take a drive? Or walk if you’re low on gas?”

   “Let’s walk, I got some cash doing my odd jobs for the damn neighbors, but I need it to last a bit longer with Max’s birthday. Got her this new board she was too chickenshit to beg our parents for.”

   “Aren’t you a darling big brother?” Evie crossed her arms to follow him when the flame dwindled low. They went around the house to the front, started down the street. “Iris has some hours for me that next Saturday night.”

   “You going to tell your mom about the secret job thing?” Billy inhaled and let smoke billow up into the afternoon light. They walked along Cherry Lane. Not touching. Counting steps while their shadows cast and the streetlights came up. A brisk night loomed, spring begging to creep through the month of March. 

   “I figured I could this summer. Around graduation. Just say I got something bigger since I’m eighteen and Iris can get me steadier hours. Gigs day or night. Maybe I’ll get to host a couple more drag shows. I miss those damn girls, the funniest performers know. I'll just let my mom down easy about the receptionist thing, hopefully she’s fine with it. Make it sound like I took initiative cause I'm a big girl.” 

   “And your grand singer plans?” He liked to ask about her and hang upon the syllables.

   “Still up in the air. I’m taking the year off to work and write. Try for a talent agent or manager. I can record maybe...try to get airtime. There’s this contest thing, they do it every year and the winners always do well. But, I’m honestly too afraid to ask my mom about it just yet. I’m saving though here and there.” Evie beamed. “You? Summer and on.”

   She was clearly asking if he was sticking around for summer. 

   “Odd lawn, house, and car jobs are getting me by. This whole street is a mess and the moms in town like to watch me work."

   "Yikes." 

   "It means better pay and tips. I’m taking Heather up on her lifeguard offer this summer. I'll save up, Dad's already going to be asking for rent when I graduate."

   "Shit."

   "Yeah. Don’t wanna bank on that mall they’re opening with all the other little shits trying to get jobs first.” Billy leaned back to let the cooler air kiss his face, sighing before he tossed his smoke out. 

   Evie came to the end of the street near the forest, swayed around a streetlamp like she was in an old Hollywood flick. Dreaming long and endless. Sometimes she worried so often that she wasn't living. Just dreaming it all away. Maybe a center line was possible.

   Maybe she'd be able to soar over it all.

   Billy waited for her to swing back around it before he pressed into her for a slow, lingering kiss. Even better, maybe they both were sharing a dream. Making it of something stronger.

   “So, how am I doing?” He joked lighter. Evie gripped the lamp to stay level, head tilting. “Two weeks in, almost three. This whole situation.”

   “Situation.” Evie mused, slyly hiding half her face behind the lamp to hum. The shadowy starlet of a femme fatale she loved to watch on television with her mother. Glinting. Dangerous. "This whole situation?" She lingered to sigh it even slower.

   "You and me." He'd sounded out, drawing nearer. "Us..." Evangeline, always the playful nymph, flitted off playfully. Spinning the other way to walk along so Billy came to her side easily.

   “I think you’re doing fine." She tapped her chin. "What about me? Evaluate my performance.” 

   “Ah. In a sea of slithery tadpoles, you’re a goddamn firecracker.” He’d laughed and Evie followed, covering her lips with one hand.

   “I don’t know how any of that correlates or makes sense, but I’ll take it.”

   “Neither do I. Just made it up to see you do that. The scrunchy thing you do when you’re too happy or upset with me.” Billy’s nose crinkled as he grinned there. Evie came up to peck his freckles.

   “You’re a total sap, Hargrove.” Evie continued, hands clasped behind her back before she inhaled the air. “Let’s hit that mini mart nearby. I’m craving a Dr. Pepper. Buy you a soda. It’s my turn.”

   “No, it isn’t. You’re just being too nice again,” Billy remarked, feet shifting slower as they crossed the street. “I can’t take you fancy places.”

   “I don’t need to go to fancy places, I just like hanging out with you wherever.” Evie turned her head to see him. “We’re both poor, we make due. Summer will be better. We can just work and...figure this out. I like it right now though, so don’t worry because I know how you shiver in those boots.”

   She pondered it.

   “Do you like it?” Evie offered quieter, earning Billy’s eyes searching her expression. Lip twitching, he tossed his arm around her. Brought Evie taut into his frame with an easier grin so they could keep walking toward the whirling, illuminated sign in the distance.

   “Yeah, I like it.” He decided. “I like you plenty. What's not to like, Evangeline?” His free hand gestured out and Evie beamed to point at that darling face. Her Eros. Encouraging her wings to unfold without pressure.

   "Wow, you're getting better and better at that." A beat. "Making me blush without rolling my eyes."

   "Please, Angel, your knees quiver every time I hit you with this smile. You might as well toss off the panties for me." For good measure, he flashed it and Evie hid from his absolute burning charm. Cheeks felt that fire bloom and billow.

    A car hurried past them. Sweeping budding flowers and loose leaves about. Delicate, they danced. Trees wobbled back and forth to the wind picking up. Evie stayed looking away to smile that time. Knew this wind would carry her easily.

   "Did you have a best friend back in California?" She moved her arm around his back as they went. 

   "I don't know. Guess I had a few in orbit."

   "Am I your best friend here?" She piped back up and Billy slowed to glance, chuckling.

   "I thought you and I were avoiding labels."

   "It's different." Came the protest.

   "No, it isn't." He paused. "Heather's your best friend."

   "Yeah, but I figured I could have more than one. Perfectly carved places for each." Evie shifted in front of him, hands smoothing up Billy's shoulders to clasp fingers round his neck. Blue eyes glittered to search.

   "You trying to push some admission outta me, Fenny?"

   Lashes batted with all the innocence they could hold.

   "Just admit it, Hargrove," she pulled him down for a lip lock, pecking his jaw and cheeks until he broke to laugh and hold her at bay. One brow lifted. "It'll be our dirty little secret."

   "Fine. Only cause you twisted my arm about it and it gets you hot. You are my very," he palmed her bottom to make her gasp in one motion, "very best friend. Happy?" Billy stole a kiss when she was still dumbfounded, molding their frames together.

   "Maybe I am." Evie sighed, sounding too raw and honest about it. She came out to see his eyes there. Tried to read them. Billy blinked to say something else.

   “So, you're already thinking about graduation and summer, huh? Moving quick.”

   “I’m optimistic is all. It’s a rare thing with me so I'm just enjoying it. I’m not used to happy and good.” Evie got cheeky to hide anything else, winking over her shoulder before she went inside the tiny store.

   Fluorescent lights washed out too many colorful packages. They picked cold cans of soda and bright yellow packs of Jujyfruit candies to curb a sweet craving. Billy gripped the paper bag in one fist and Evie snatched his free hand when they got outside.

   “C’mon!” She picked up the pace. “Let’s catch the bus to the other side of town.”

   “Billy Hargrove doesn’t take the bus. It’s all full.” He’d complained, still rushing after her to the stop.

   “Try something new.” Evie was giggling, tugging at him to get on.

   With the bus full of residents leaving work, they took some standing room with a group up front. Fingers curled into the handles above, swaying closer together due to the rocking and crowding. A hard turn sent Evie into Billy’s chest, her hand sprang out over his shoulder to catch the bar just above his head.

   “Trying to jump my bones in public, little Miss Fenny?” He feigned a look of awe, brows lifting playfully. His free arm slipped around the small of Evie’s back, bracing her there into his marble frame. “You know how much easier it is if you just ask, Angel?”

   Evie wanted to scoff. Wanted to scrunch that annoyed look she was known for. Wanted to send him to the floor and kiss him for miles and miles. But, she just stood there in the dim, flickering bus lights. Watched his expression relax. Not really breathing until she reminded herself. 

   Billy seemed to remember as well. At the back and forth shifting of the vehicle, they squished together. Forcing looks away to see the path again. Billy pushed his thigh further between her legs. Both of them idly rubbing together now. Evie felt the heat crawl up her cheeks, lungs tremoring. Billy’s fist holding the bag shifting a little lower on her back, firm and scalding hot. 

   She peered up at his jawline. Looked away. Felt Billy’s eyes wander back after before he flickered elsewhere. Denim pushed against denim. Billy hitched this breath as if he might whimper. Swallowed it down. Hips swaying back and forth and back again. A thumb pushed deftly into her back. Evie shifting in, lips parting. Trembling as Billy turned his head to see her centimeters from him. 

   “This is our stop.” She’d said in his ear. Leaning flush into him to pull the cord down. Billy inhaled the amber. Brushed his nose into her own while she came back out.

   “Don’t wanna stop.” His freckles looked especially glowy outlined in a rare blush. The bus skidded and Evie veered back with some amusement. Brown eyes casting Billy up and down before she skipped off in a hurry, leaving him to chase her because he’d always chase her. Bag still wrinkled around Billy’s fist, he caught up with her. Under the streetlamps surrounded by dancing moths. 

   “We near Lover’s Lake?”

   “Yeah, the park nearby. Figured some loitering would do us good.” Evie stepped across the grass and sand. Listened to the dark structures creak. “C’mon. I love the swings.” 

   She plopped back into one, legs kicking some before Billy joined her. He cracked one can of soda to offer it, feet shifting over the sand to sway closer together. Chains creaking. 

   They clicked drinks and guzzled fizz before Evie snagged the candy out. Stealing a few chewy pieces. The bright box got passed back and forth during a comfortable silence. Billy watched Evie as she observed the moon there. 

   “Do you know any constellations?” She’d asked quieter, forcing him out of the daze. Curls caught the illumination with stars dotting her dark eyes. 

   “Not really.” He took the candy back as she swallowed a piece.

   “You see that crooked line? Those four little guys, they call that...Salem’s Lot. And...” Evie touched her lips, pointing again. “Those two bright boys there. Called Shawshank. Oh, and that one-”

   “These are Stephen King references.” He pushed her.

   “No, I’m very smart and they’re real-life constellations. Listen and learn, Billy boy.”

   “So, are you gonna call that grouping, The Shining or The Overlook?” He pointed to a cluster and Evie snickered.

   “Obviously that’s Carrietta White’s Constellation. Duh. Cause it looks like a rain of blood.” Evie snorted and Billy joined her, heads pressing together as they giggled like school children.

   “You know she wears a crushed red velvet dress in the book? Not pink as seen in the movie.” Billy stretched out, finishing his soda.

   “You know she’s fat in the book, too?” Evie winked at him, eyed the trash, and tried to toss her can at it. Missing badly, it smacked the rim and fell in the sand with a clatter. “Damn it!” Billy laughed at her louder.

   “Don’t try for a career on the court, Evie.” He watched her pout as she plucked it up to throw it away properly. “Now, watch the master work.” He aimed as she sat down. One deft hand reeled back and launched it only to have Evie’s palm smack it easily the other direction. Almost falling out of her seat cackling, she got the candy pushed into her arm before he gawked and went to get it.

   “Oh,” she kept up without air, “I thought you were the master? You should have seen your face!”

   “Yeah, yeah.” He grumbled, dunking it in the can with an echoing clank. For some cheery consolation, she offered the rest of the box to him. Tiny candy pieces fell into his palm before he pushed them all into his mouth at once, eyes lifting to the sky again. Billy made a face and turned to go to push her swing. “Gimme another constellation.”

   “Hmm.” Evie held the chains, began to swing properly at his coaxing. Felt like they were in a secret garden together. Water rippling against the air distantly. Cold chill not bothering either of them. “Those two stars. The little one and the big guy. See?”

   Billy gripped the chains, keeping her swing up against him to follow the gaze

   “That’s Neverland. Second star to the right and straight on till morning.” She snickered again as Billy pushed her forward. “Bet I can beat you there. I’ll jump from the swing.”

   “You’re on.” Billy stole the seat next to her, both of them pumping higher. Curls fluttering. Laughing. Happy because they were together and that mattered.

   “I’m going to overthrow Pan and Hook. Become the most fantastic Lost Girl with a siren song to command the island and you’ll write your stories.”

   “Think so?” Billy pushed himself higher. Actually thought he might fly with Evie there.

   “Yes! You’ll tell the greatest stories ever heard through the land and they’ll echo back down here to be loved too.” She proclaimed that. Not having heard Billy’s stories, but believing what was in his heart. 

   Time slowed. Wild laughter crackled toward the sky. Utter sparks as they jumped together and collided to roll around the sand. Evie was still alight with joy under him, hair splayed everywhere as Billy snapped up to check her over, hovering. Evie’s giggling tapered off against the night air. She stared up at him. Framed in twinkling stars. He said something she didn’t catch.

   “You have beautiful eyes,” Evie sounded out slower, lost in the endless crystalline blue. “Did you mean it?”

   “Mean, what?”

   “What you said when we were lying in bed together. You said I was the best thing about this place. People never say things like that. Not to girls like me. I believed it when you said it though and it was easy too.” Evie skimmed her fingers over his jacket. Watched Billy’s eyes flicker to recall that moment and the clouds he floated upon like lily-pads in a pond.

   Billy swept down. Planted a hot kiss that was all lips. Swelled her mouth when he pulled out. He left Evie fluttered and came to her ear.

   “That was a yes.” He pushed up, eyes too sly. “By the way.” Evie took a hand when he offered one and got pulled to her feet, bodies stumbling together. They tried to brush the sand off fabric. 

   “Do you think about that night? The dance, I mean. Not...the sex. Well, I guess it’s okay to think about the sex actually.” She blushed there when Billy’s lip quirked. His fingers still wrapped around her wrist. “Before all that went down with Brock. It was-”

   “Not terrible.” He finished.

   “Not at all. The first part of the night, sometimes I wish we could go back and-”

   “Rewrite it.” Billy looked around, giving Evie a tug. He pulled her up on the metal roundabout, painted red and blue that was chipping away. “Hold on.” Another smile had curled as he braced to get it spinning.

   “Billy!” Evie jerked to hold tight to the bars. Hair flying up. Curls coiled out. Fire billowing gracefully. “What are you doing!”

   “Turning back the clock,” he charged and jumped on with her, wobbling to hold something, "to redo it.” Evie grabbed for his coat. Fisting the fabric when they locked eyes. Wind rushed in a thrill with memories tumbling together and apart. 

   Her wings sprang forth.

   Billy made Evie the still point to his turning world. For just a moment. Knew, if anything, that meeting her was something truly important. An unseen force that would twist his heart forever.

   Spinning round and round. He recalled the metallic confetti dancing and the way the music pulsed. The carousel began to slow, both teens holding the bars and each other to say level.

   Slower, Evie pecked a kiss upon his lips to mirror the first. Unable to come out far, Billy was already closing the distance for the second. Trying to pay her back with a thousand sweet kisses. 

   Cheers rang and fireworks burst. She remembered it all too. How dizzy and still the world seemed to be. How it hushed for her too sweetly. Billy’s hands on her face, cradling delicately to angle the second kiss a little deeper. They felt the metal clink to stillness under them and inched back out.

   “I want to go home with you,” Evie said the words she wished she had that night. Huge dark eyes glittering. She found his lips again. Not worried about air or what the future held for them. Lost on a rosy haze and perfectly fine for these stolen fleeting seconds. “Can we go?” Billy searched her, thumb sweeping a circle into her jaw. He smiled fully.

   “Only if we can take the bus again.”

** ** ** ** 

   “Happy Birthday!” Evie gushed, offering a gift to a small pile. Max had her arms around her before she’d gotten a chance to turn. One hand shifted to the shorter girl’s back. Music whirled with a campy light show, made the horribly patterned carpets glow. “Carol and Heather are on their way in. Tommy’s around but he won’t hang near the table.”

   “Neil’s going to be late. Work stuff.” This explained why Max’s smile was so bright. Evie nudged her chin, head cocking. “You brought your own skates.”

   “I know it’s dorky, but they’re my babies.” Evie gestured to the red skates swung over one shoulder. “Evie Fenny doesn’t rent her skates.”

   “That’s El, come meet her,” Max pulled Evie off after she got one wave at Susan behind the table setting up. “Billy’s grabbing stuff from the car. He drove us.” 

   El Hopper was a tiny thing. Almost like a little bird compared to Hopper’s hulking frame behind her. She peered around and seemed at instant ease upon seeing Max.

   “El, this is my neighbor, Evie," Max introduced them, "she’s cool.”

   El made this gesture like she had a needle and poked at her hand.

   “Yes!” Max got it, tugging Evie’s arm. “She taught me the felting thing.”

   “Hope the sharp objects weren’t a bother in your house, Chief Hopper.” Evie perked up at Jim with a sheepish expression. “I should have asked you, I know it might seem a little dangerous.”

   He actually laughed at that. If only she knew the danger these kids had gotten into prior.

   “Believe me, crafts are a welcomed change.”

   “El, nice to meet you. I’m Evie. Max talks about you all the time.” Evie held out her hand and the young girl looked shocked. “Good things.”

   A slower smile crossed. She took Evie’s hand to shake it. Awkward about her navigation but trying to take everything in. Clearly never been to a party like this one. Kids of various ages circled the floor on skates. Laughing. Holding hands. 

   “Max...talks about you too. I like your hair.” El mirrored. Peered to Hopper with a pleased expression he matched. She offered Max a wrapped gift. Evie grinned and touched her curls, pulled up into two high, rounded buns.

   “C’mon, let me show you the table they’re setting up.” Max took El’s wrist to usher her off.

   “Are you...staying to skate?” Evie turned to the Chief.

   “El’s, ah, not used to crowds. She came from some unfortunate circumstances. I’d like to stay close. First party. Maybe I’m hovering.” He pushed his hands into his pockets. Not in uniform. Evie beamed a little.

   “She’s young, you’re worried. It’s sweet, actually. You’re just being a good dad.” The smile seemed to dither in her eyes. Even when Jack was married to Mona, he wasn't always around. Work and trips kept him busy, but he stayed to close to Evie the moment he arrived home with his little gifts and endless stories. “Don’t come running over if she falls, we got her.”

   “Yeah, uh, if you could keep an eye on El when you see her around. That would mean a lot to me. I know you babysat the Henderson kid. El doesn’t need a babysitter, she’s just… This is new for her.” Jim gestured. Digging for a smoke he couldn’t have in the immediate area. 

   “Heather, Carol, and I will keep an eye out.”

   “Carol?” He chuckled. “Perkins?”

   “Oh, yeah, we made up. Funny thing.”

   “Almost as funny as you hanging out with the Hargrove boy through winter.” He quirked his brow.

   “What can I say, Chief...” Evie shrugged. “I’m...branching out.”

   As if on cue, Billy paced in a side door. Bag clutched under one arm. He caught Evie’s glance instantly. Both of them locked in and back out on cue. Blue eyes shifted up and down because she was wearing his denim jacket over a little lacy, floral top tucked into her jeans.

   Neil would arrive and they had an act to keep up. Ignoring each other.

   “I’ll sit far." Jim offered. "Pretend I’m not here.”

   She about cackled, lost in thought still.

   “I’ll just pretend you’re my real dad,” Evie winced at herself, saw him pause with some subtle awe, “oof, I’m not sure where that came from. Ouch. Okay. Walking away now. Sorry, Chief.”

   “Evie.” He eased a gentle hand toward her. “What I said. If there’s...anything going on. You can talk to me. On or off the record.”

   “Yeap. Right. I’m okay. I’m...I’m gonna...skate. Yeah. Sorry. Oh, my…” Evie whirled to hurry off, cringing all the way to the table. “I think I just had a mental break.”

   “What?” Heather had chuckled.

   “Nothing. Time to skate?” Came Evie’s begging. Agreement followed.

   Hopper made himself scarce with a cigarette and plate of cheese fries in the corner. Billy plopped himself into a chair behind the decorated table, looking disinterested. Not catching Evie’s eyes while she sat with the girls to put her skates on. Just watched Susan set out plates for pizza and cake. 

   Evie went out with Heather first for a lap, both of them giggling and pulling little stunts to show off for Tommy who was on the ground as Carol pulled at him. Max jumped over his leg, cackling before she tried to get El to come out with them. 

   “Kinda reminds me of us. They’re too cute.” Heather quipped, whirling to skate backward. They joined the younger girls, hoping to get El relaxed and away from the wall she seemed to cling to. Every turn, Evie shot Billy a look. Got his lips quirking before he ruefully was peering away. 

   “Do you want to skate, Billy?” Susan had asked after a beat, weary of the music already. Bit of a glittery disco mess. That same dreamy rose haze in the air.

   “About as much as I want to give my old man a sponge bath, Susan.” Billy frowned for effect and dropped it when she actually laughed at him. It was an easier thing for them to talk without Neil’s shadow. 

   “Well, the offer is open if you want to.” Susan thought to tell him Evie looked beautiful today when she caught him staring at her for the third time but decided not to be obvious. Not yet. 

   “You’re supposed to tell me I’m being inappropriate and I’m going to send your only daughter down with me.” He recited easily.

   “I was your age once, Billy, I know how to laugh still.” Susan seemed surprised at the revelation herself. Slowly, she took a seat next to him. Not leaving another chair as a buffer like she usually did. “It might not be so bad. Her following you, you know, after this. When she’s older. She still looks up to you.”

   It became clear what Susan was asking him. Max would resent her one day down the line. For the choices she made. The things she couldn’t stop no matter how hard she tried. Maybe Billy and Max didn’t always get along, but he’d be a safer place for her than whatever was leftover in that house. Susan would always be under Neil Hargrove, but she could ensure her daughter would not be. One day.

   Billy leaned forward on his elbows, palms rubbing. He felt for his ring and remembered it was hidden under Evie’s dipping sweetheart neckline. He didn’t say anything, but met Susan’s eyes.

   “Evie’s been a good friend to her.” Susan crossed her legs and sat back to watch the girls laugh. Slowly easing into the conversation. El wobbled, holding hands with Max and Evie to gain some speed. Heather was trying to help Carol steady poor Tommy. “Don’t you think so?”

   “I haven’t noticed.” Billy turned his head aside.

   “She’s very pretty. Kind. That’s all I’m saying. She and her mother, they’re nice neighbors to have on Cherry.”

   “Jesus, Susan, why don’t you date them both?” Billy shot up to go to the snack counter. Susan ghosted this smile after him, hands clasping. “Cheese fries. Jalapenos...Extra jalapenos.” He got his plate and turned to see Chief Hopper’s cigarette glow red. “You got any more of those? My pack is out and they don't have a machine in this joint.”

   Jim just eyed him.

   “I’m legal.” Billy puffed before a stick flicked across the table. “Camels. Unfiltered. Disgusting. Are you a flannel hobo of some kind with those?”

   The Chief gawked at him.

   “Don’t you smoke Reds? Baby’s first cigarette.”

   Billy matched him. Offended.

   “I’m smoking with the big boys, Hop. You should try it.”

   “You in a place to complain, kid?” Jim reached to take it back before Billy swiped, lighting up to puff. 

   “No, sir.” His lighter snapped shut. “You unable to cut the cord or is dressing like a lumberjack to hang out at a 70s roller disco a hobby?”

   “Haven’t seen you down at the station in a while. Few months, in fact. Turning over a new leaf this year?” Jim remarked instead, leaning forward on his elbows.

   “Aw. You miss me or something? Your boys finally get tired of chasing me down? Or trying to.” Billy gave this comedic pout, head turning to eye Evie again. Graceful swan that she was out there. His jacket hanging off her shoulders, exposing that neck. Little wisps of curls swayed about from her space buns decorated with matching glittery star barrettes, loose hair framing her face. Brown eyes flicked up and he snatched his gaze away. “Guess I found something else to get into that isn’t trouble. You guys bore me down there, I like to be amused.”

   “The real crime-stopper, boredom. Color me impressed and shocked.” Jim seemed to like that, eyes rolling. Billy puffed and swept a piece of tobacco from his mouth. “I guess whatever you’re doing, keep it up.” He watched Billy crunch on some salty jalapenos, plucking five gooey fries at once to swallow them down. Almost starved.

   “I intend to.” Billy flicked his greasy fingers to his brow. “Chief.”

   “William.” 

   Billy mumbled as he went off, finishing the smoke to flick it out a back door. Eyes shifting to watch the girls plus poor Tommy. El was already better than him.

   “Man, I’m dying out here. Help me. I’ll tag you in.” Tommy scrambled up the sidewall and clung, out of breath. Freckles all dewy.

   “You wanted to be a good boyfriend,” Billy cackled for good measure, "that'll teach you."

   “Feed me a fry,” Tommy begged over the barrier.

   “Fuck out of here, they’re mine. My dad will show soon so you can disappear to a corner and get your own damn fries.” To make it a point, Billy stood there and fed himself.

   Behind Tommy, Max skidded and fell with Evie barely catching her. Both girls had gone down in a fit of giggling.

   “We’re fine, go on!” Max waved to Heather and El ahead of them. Carol came to steal Tommy back as Billy craned to see his step-sister.

   “You alright?” Evie was picking her up when Max’s shirt slipped closer to her pale shoulder, flashing a burst of purple there the size of a softball. “Oh, my god.” It slipped out before she could stop it.

   “That’s-!” Max cut herself off and fixed her shirt. Spring was creeping and all she donned was long-sleeved and frumpy. Dressing almost like Susan. “I fell, you know, on my board.” Evie tried to give her the dignity of a look that said she believed it. Must have cracked. “Evie, it’s nothing. Don’t worry. Please.”

   Dressing like Susan. Sounding like Billy.

   “Max, my house is-”

   “I know, but don’t… Don’t say anything. Not to Billy or my mom, ah… Neil’s here.” Max put her head down and skated around Evie to go away. 

   There was something particularly helpless about watching a young girl flee obediently to her monster. Evie wondered if this was what she looked like to Billy headed to Fredrick's place.

   Small. Scared. Lost.

   Neil Hargrove started with words. Lots of horrible words that whittled Max down to a hard pit. Then pushing. Then some grabbing. Then shoving. Into walls mostly.

   The hit didn’t bruise Max. It was more of a swipe to make her go to her room for talking back. Whatever that meant to Neil. But, he was drunk and he caught her jaw with an open palm. That stayed red for the day until she snuck a pack of frozen peas, not wanting Susan or Billy to know.

   But, the swipe sent her into the dining room table. Left the violet petals bursting under her skin. Evie lost the urge to skate and came out. Saw Billy’s eyes again and paused to help Heather usher El out for food. 

   “You’re a natural.” Evie complimented which earned a full smile. El opened her mouth to speak before Billy appeared in front of them.

   “They’re making us sing.” He cocked his head, peering at El. “You’re the one with the funny name, aren’t you?”

   “Jane. But,” she seemed to have trouble staring at him for more than three extended seconds and pointed to her chest, “El.” Red crept across her cheeks. Billy towered over her, cocking a wider grin to play up the fact that she was all blushy for a pretty older boy.

   “El?” He raised one brow. “What’s the L stand for?”

   “Ignore him.” Heather pulled the younger girl around Billy as he chuckled, pausing to see Evie. Her colorless expression.

   “You okay?” He said it hard with a furrowed brow.

   “Fine.” She tried to make it sound cold but it came out near silent. Head turned down as she flitted around him to join the party.

   Neil, stiff and stoic, pressing his lips like he was at the damn DMV. Susan plastered a broader grin to dote on him after his long day, lingering close to his side as they set out pizza and readied the cake.

   It was all so routine. Like getting your shots. 

   Pizza. Sing. Candles. Wish. Cake. Gifts. Thank you.

   Billy and Evie took the farthest seats from each other. Played a game of glance and ignore that they’d made up on the spot. They both were either losing or winning.

   “Strange,” Neil remarked as he pulled Max aside for another slice. “You and the high school girls.”

   “Oh, I invited El too, she’s my age. I didn’t want to leave Evie out and the girls...they’re nice to me.”

   “They don’t dress like nice girls.”

   Heather and Carol both donned perfectly normal tees and jeans. Nothing would suffice for Neil Hargrove. Max shifted her cake around. No longer hungry for it.

   “Maybe we’ll talk about the type of girl you should hang around at a later time. The Fenny girl is nice enough, even if her shirt is a little too...low. Dresses kinda tight. Bit of an odd one. She’s different. Her friends, well...I’m just not sure, Maxine.”

   “Yes, sir.” She looked at her birthday cake like it was infested with worms. Carefully forced a bite and set it aside. 

   Max hung around. Smiled and thanked everyone after each birthday present. Even hugged Neil only cause he opened his arms at her. She said bye to El then Heather. Carol seemed to be turning in as well so Tommy went out back to get the car. 

   As the party went on and dwindled, Evie caught Billy’s eyes gesturing to the rental counter. He slipped around the corner into the many shelves and Evie turned back to see Max and Susan at the table. Neil seated in a chair not helping them clean up, eyes elsewhere. Casually, she skated around and got her arm snatched. A gasp snuffed against a pair of lips. Kisses hidden away from the world. 

   “Paid the kid a few coins and a threat to leave for ten minutes."

   Music vibrated the shelves. Evie put her arms around Billy.

   “I still have skates on.”

   “Even better. I might have a thing for girls in red skates.” Billy was all hands, holding Evie steady. Pulling one leg around his hip. Pushing denim into denim. Hot friction might have done her in any other day.

   “We are not hooking up with all the smelly rental skates.” Evie laughed into his lips, still pecking back and peering over her shoulder. She paused to see his eyes. Wanted to blurt what she’d seen on Max’s body. Even to Billy now, it felt wrong. So, she said something else.

   “Hey, we should…keep an eye on your sister, you know. It’s her birthday. She’s...She needs her big brother.”

   Billy huffed into her neck.

   “Fine, fine, but you’ll regret not taking the adventure on here.”

   “Yeah, I’m sure.” Evie shifted. “My feet hurt and we can make-out in my bed later.” She kissed his neck. “I’ll do that thing you like if you promise you went easy on the product down there.”

   “Only dotted the gold crown. Scout’s honor.” Billy winked and she rolled her eyes. He peered out first. “Give it a second then follow.”

   “Wait.” Evie thumbed her red lipstick from his mouth. “Now, shoo.” Billy licked his lips and snuck out. She waited a moment. Let the happy butterflies land in her stomach then followed. Pausing, her skates came off for more comfortable tennis shoes.

   “Evangeline, do you need a ride home with us later?” Neil had asked. 

   “No, thank you, I was getting a ride with Carol now.” She smiled and looked for red hair to say her goodbyes. “Where’d Max go?” Evie collected her coat and Susan paused to peer around.

   “She was here a second ago. Neil?” Hands dropped a stack of plates into the trash.

   “Probably went to the bathroom.” He shrugged, squinting at all the moving lights that were making his head pound. “Billy, go find your sister.” 

   Billy seemed to notice the look on Evie’s face and feel the same chill before he hurried off without fighting. Susan looked through the sea of kids and teens meandering as Evie passed her to check the ajar side door. 

   "Max!" The one flickering light at the exit made her skin crawl. A cry echoed distantly followed by a dull crash in the dark. Like a bag of trash hitting the dumpster.

   Evie dropped her skates to follow the hollowed-out sound. Exhaust swept up her nose and tires gave a harsh wail, horns sounding while a faraway car disappeared around a row of trees to get to the main street with the rest. 

   “Max!” Evie charged out. Heart painfully thudding within her ribs. 

   “Evie?” Carol heard her and footsteps echoed around the building.

   “Max!” Evie was near tears now. A shift in some fallen trash bags made her pause when two sneakers appeared around the side of the dumpster. This odd scratching sound left her lips. Evie threw herself over the tiny body there, turned Max’s limp frame over. 

   Her shirt collar was ripped open where someone grabbed her. Or tried to. Dragging then dropping her when she put up a fight. Bleeding scrapes and dirt scuffed all over her pale freckled skin from the rough tumble. Carol got to them first and pulled off her sweater to cover Max’s torso while Evie gathered her up. 

   “Help!” Carol called because Evie couldn’t. More bodies arrived. Tommy. Susan. Billy. Neil. 

   “Neil, she won’t wake up.” Susan pulled her daughter out of Evie’s arms, shaking her. Moans filtered out, but nothing else. “What happened?”

   “I don’t know. I saw...a car. It was too dark. I just found her here on the ground. Someone tried to...” Evie wheezed out and never finished, gesturing aimlessly. 

   “Susan, give Maxine to Billy. She needs a hospital.” Neil swept down as Billy urged his sister’s tiny body away. This hard. flamed expression on his face as if he wasn't really here.

   Max looked broken. Not real. A doll left under the bed for too long without love or cherished stories to comfort it. Evie felt the knees of her jeans soak through from the wet pavement. Too many words hit the air and Evie’s eyes dropped to where that harsh car had gone to.

   Evangeline wondered what kind of monster would grab up a little girl and throw her out into the trash.

   And why the world bore so many of that same design.

~~~~~

Mad Max :( Her story line is gonna start to push toward the front here and there with Evie's in pieces. Thanks again for following the fic, I really appreciate it! Please please leave some words if you enjoy the fic. XOXO Taglist open

TAGLIST:: @80sbxtch​ @nottherightseason @alagalaska @alongcamedolly @kellyk-chan @10blurredsmoke10 @charmed-asylum @unmistakablyunknown @lukespatterson @arkhamasylumpatient-blog1

[365days365movies]

February 14, 2021: Brokeback Mountain (2005) (Part 1)

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Or Palentine’s, Galentine’s, Single Persons Appreciation Day, what have you!

Anyway, on this day where we (and the greeting card companies) celebrate love in all of its forms, I think it’s about time to diversify my movie choices a little bit. SO, for the next few days at least, we’re going to change it up, starting with a film that shook the 2005 public’s perceptions of love: Brokeback Mountain.

And who brings this movie to us? Same guy who gave us this:

And this:

And would give us this:

Ang Lee wasn’t originally meant to be the director of the film, as Gus van Sant was signed on to do it. You know, Good Will Hunting, Drugstore Cowboy, that one movie where Una Thurman plays the greatest hitchhiker in the world with giant thumbs, and eventually finds herself meeting multiple people, including Keanu Reeves, Pat Morita (Mr. Miyagi from The Karate Kid), and a group of radicalesbians who like in the Great Plains, coexisting with a group of critically endangered whooping cranes to whom they;’ve fed peyote, while also opposing the intentions of an evil feminine hygiene product company that seeks to take over the land for their factories? YOU KNOW, THAT MOVIE?

It’s called Even Cowgirls Get the Blues, and I wasn’t even slightly exaggerating with that summary, I SWEAR.

Anyway, he couldn’t do it, and Joel Schumacher also passed on it eventually, so they asked Ang Lee if he’d do it. After CTHD and Hulk, dude was on his way to retire, but after he cried at the end of the script, he accepted the job. AND HISTORY WAS MADE

Before I get into it, I should probably frank about something. I’m a cissexual, heterosexual man in a straight relationship with my girlfriend. She says hi, by the way. Here she is, a massive Jake Gyllenhaal fan, getting ready to watch this movie for the first time with me:

Isn’t she lovely? Anyway, just thought I’d be totally transparent about that. Incidentally, I remember when this film came out, as well as the fervor around it. This was JUST as the gay marriage debate was EXPLODING into the public scene, so this was obviously quite the talking point at the time.

 Anyway, shall we find out who’s not going to quit whom? SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap

Cowboys Ennis del Mar (Heath Ledger) and Jack Twist (Jake Gyllenhaal) are waiting outside of a trailer, with Ennis having just arrived  on a truck that reminded me of Optimus Prime, and I’m sorry. They’ve been hired by Joe Aguirre (Randy Quaid) to look after a group of sheep and guide them over Brokeback Mountain, a fictional mountain in Wyoming.

The two finally introduce each other, with Ennis seeming considerably closed off as compared to the open Jack Twist. They head to a bar, where the two get to know each other a but better Jack’s an occasional shepherd, but highly involved in rodeos throughout the year. Ennis, meanwhile, is a regular ranchhand at his family’s farm.

Time for sheep-herding, as the two guide their flock of sheep on horseback, with soft country guitars playing in the background over all of it. And I gotta say, the music combined with the visuals is giving me this real sleepy ambience vibe that I 100% would watch specifically to fall asleep to. Which is not an insult by any means, by the way; it’s just super relaxing.

The two make camp with the sheep in a mountain valley, and now I want to go camping. I realize that it’s February, and I live in a place VERY non-conducive to camping, but GODDAMN this movie makes me want to go camping. In the wilderness, surrounded by bird calls and crisp mountain air, LET’S GO.

We find out that Ennis is engaged to be wed to a woman named Alma, while Jack is yearning to break free of needing to take jobs like this. And all the while, they’re eating beans, scaring away coyotes, and fending of REALLY REALLY FAT American black bears, who you could really easily scare away without too much difficulty. You ever stared at a bear while both of you were in the woods? I HAVE. And we BOTH took off from each other in opposite directions. They’re not the bravest of animals, black bears. Grizzlies, however, you don’t wanna fuck with.

Anyway, after they face off against that bear and lose their newly bought supplies, they go hunting the next day and take down an elk. Which is a LOT of venison, I tell you what! Oh, and I’m not a hunter, just to be clear, but elk are fuggin’ HUGE. Seriously, XL deer they are.

Anyway, time goes on after that, and they continue to make their way through the mountains. And they get to know each other more, sharing their rodeo experiences and family backgrounds. Ennis also opens up pretty considerably, a fact not missed by Jack. The two become friends.

My girlfriend asks an interesting question: if I had never heard of this movie in any capacity...would I have known the extent of the relationship of Ennis and Jack? And honestly...I’m legitimately not sure at this point. I think I would’ve just assumed that they’d stay close friends, but no further than that. Call that being raised in a society with heterosexual bias towards relationships, or call that me not being a natural shipper. Both are probably accurate, to be honest.

Anyway, it’s getting cold out, and Jack’s sleeping in the tent one night while Ennis is freezing his balls off outside. With Jack’s insistence, he goes inside the tent to sleep next to Jack. And then...

Oh. Well, OK. Again, though, still not sure that at this point I’d...oh wait...OH...OH.

OK. Think I’d be able to tell at this point what the movie’s about.

So, yeah, they have sex. It’s spontaneous, it’s wild, it’s heat of the moment passion...and it’s REAL awkward the next day, I tell you what. That next evening, Ennis and Jack both insist that they “ain’t queer,” and that this is “a one-shot thing they got goin’.”

Uh, boys? There’s some important evidence to the contrary that we should consider here. But, OK, it’s a different culture, this is super new to you both, I get it. I’m not one to talk on the coming out or discovery experience (again, straight cis dude over here), but I understand that there’s some inherent denial. But still, they continue their relationship as is, for the time being.

Which is not as private as they thought, as Joe Aguirre observes them chasing each other naked on the mountain from afar. Whoops. Well, it doesn’t matter as much, as they still have a job to do until summer ends. And that job continues. They encounter another herd of sheep that gets tangled up with theirs, snow falls on the mountain and they have to deal with that, etc.

Then one day, the two need to head out. Jack goes to fetch Ennis, who’s moping on a hillside about something. He does this play lasso thing, which seems cute...

...until it turns into a full on brawl right there on the hillside. OK. Well. Some heavy denial going on here, I think, especially on Ennis’ part. Which is somewhat understandable, given the culture, and the fact that Ennis is engaged. Oh, by the way, hello infidelity. GodDAMN IT. Escaped you for TWO MOVIES IN A ROW, and you’re back rearing your ugly head.

Anyway, the job is done soon, and Aguirre’s not exactly happy with them, as they’ve apparently lost some sheep and picked up some from the other herd’s flock accidentally. With a light rebuke from Aguirre, the two part ways with not much else said. Jack asks if Ennis will come back the next summer, and Ennis reminds him that he’s getting married that fall. But as Ennis leaves...

Huh. Interesting reaction, that. Well, in the next scene, Ennis gets married to Alma Beers (Michelle Williams), and they seem to have a very happy relationship. They have two daughters together in a pretty small amount of time. The next summer, Jack tries to get a job with Joe Aguirre once again, but is refused on account of his relationship with Ennis on the mountain...kind of.

See, here’s the thing. Joe rebukes Jack for having their relationship on the mountain, leaving the dogs to babysit the sheep, rather than do the job they were hired for. And, uh...he’s not wrong, honestly. Yeah, OK, there’s definitely some homophobia laced in there, obviously, but they were hired to watch the sheep, and we only really saw them do that once or twice. So, yeah, sorry to say, but Joe’s not entirely unjustified in not rehiring Jack.

At a Fourth of July festival, Ennis brings his wife and daughters to see the fireworks, when a couple of bikers antagonize the crowd as a whole. This results in Ennis telling them to stop, and a fight takes place, with Ennis IMMEDIATELY taking out the two bikers, with little effort. Anger issues there, Ennis? 

Jack returns to the rodeo, with new other options for money. He’s clearly also coming to terms with his own sexuality, as seen when he not so subtly hits on a cowboy at the bar. However, he also meets a young woman, a barrel racer named Lureen Newsome (Anne Hathaway), whom he seems to get along with fairly quickly at a rodeo. They dance together at the bar that night, and, uh...park.

And that, of course, leads to their eventual marriage and parentage as well. Looks like Lureen’s parents arent the biggest fans of Jack, though. Sure that’s going to lead to a healthy relationship down the road.

Been about 4 years since Brokeback Mountain, and this is punctuated by Jack paying a visit to Ennis’ place, which Ennis is told about by Alma. He seems...very anious, waiting nervously for a day to see him. But he finally arrives, and the two embrace happily. And then...

Oh, and Alma sees? Sure, sure, oh, and they go to a motel IMMEDIATELY? Oh, OK, OK, infidelity? Yuuuuuuupyupyupyupyupyup, halfway point? Yeah, sure, see you in Part 2. Geez.

[maybe-your-left]

Cowboy Blues: Almost Heaven

Sorry for the long update process, I have been going through a lot with new meds and I wasn't in the zone for writing. But I'M BACK and I MISSED CLYDE. Also, my boyfriend said this chapter was 'too long' but who cares?!

Here is a link to my Masterlist with all the chapters and WIP I have! 

-----

Saturday could not have come any slower, you were so ready for your outing with Clyde but the days dragged by like molasses. You had kept your texting to a minimum with him just so you’d appear more casual, and because he was really bad at replying. You weren’t sure if he had ever used a phone for texting before he met you, but his short replies were just enough to keep you excited for what was to come. 

You had offered to stay the night with Clyde on Friday so it would be easier to get up and go but he wasn’t a fan of you being at the ranch all by yourself. Which explains why now you were dragging yourself out of bed at 5 AM to drive to his place. “Fuck…” you groaned into your pillow when the alarm went off, rolling over and reaching for your phone you saw a couple of messages from Clyde. Rubbing your eyes you sat up and stretched before reading and starting your trek. 

Mornin’ Sunshine, I know y’r already packed but make sure y’ bring a swimsuit. 

“Whatever Clyde,” you yawned before grabbing your bags and shuffling out to the car. 

The drive to the Logan Ranch was quick, practically no one was on the road on this lazy Saturday morning. You even had time to stop and grab some coffee for you and Clyde. Pulling into the ranch you saw a horse trailer, attached to a truck you hadn’t seen Clyde drive before. The man himself was packing the truck bed full of coolers, bags, and other things you couldn’t recognize. 

“Morning handsome,” you called out. 

Clyde turned around and a smile split his face, setting down the equipment he walked over to your car. You got out as quickly as possible and Clyde engulfed you in a hug, effectively lifting you off the ground. “M’ so glad y’ came, I know y’r not a mornin’ person,” he smiled up at you before kissing your cheek. 

“Put me down I have stuff in my car,” you kicked your legs to emphasize your point. 

Once down Clyde rounded your car and grabbed all the bags before you could even help out. Leaving you holding two cups of coffee and a smile. “Let’s get going darlin’,” he called before climbing into the driver’s seat. Opening your door you almost spilled your drink when Leroy jumped up into your seat. 

“Down boy,” Clyde scolded, “That ain’t y’r spot today. Get in the back.” 

Poor Leroy looked at his dad so broken-hearted. He started to whine when Clyde grabbed his collar and tried to pull him into the backseat. “Clyde, he can sit on my lap,” you whined, you didn’t want Leroy to be crying the whole trip because you took his spot. 

“Sunshine, he’s a big dog,” he said, “Y’ don’ need t’ coddle him.” 

“Please Clyde?” 

He just sighed and dragged Leroy into his lap, grumbling at the dog as he started licking his face while you climbed in. Once you had the coffee settled, and your seatbelt on you patted your lap for the big baby. Leroy happily jumped into your lap, effectively knocking the wind out of you. Grunting you tried to situate him so you could breathe but fuck that dog was heavy. Whatever Clyde fed him was too much, but you didn’t want Clyde to know he was right so you decided to grin and bear it. 

“Y’ okay over there darlin’?” Clyde smiled at your groaning from Leroy. 

“Yup.” 

“The drives ‘bout two hours, so lemme know if y’ need a break.” 

You averted your eyes from his smile, he couldn’t win. Not today, so you just hummed back and began petting Leroy. This was going to be a long trip. 

-----

Holy shit Leroy needs to go on a diet  

Your inner monologue was constant throughout the drive, Leroy never really settled on your lap, which earned many groans from you and snorts from Clyde every time you made a noise. He had tried to make conversation with you during the drive but you couldn’t pay attention because of the fat dog who kept kissing you. You didn’t even get the chance to drink your coffee because he had your left arm pinned under his butt. Clyde had offered a couple of times to give you your coffee but your pride wouldn’t let him feel like he was right. And also because you were slightly nervous with him driving with just his metal arm but he was in control the whole time, it just took you a minute to calm down about it. He had been driving for a while with one arm so you had no reason to worry. 

After another hour went by you had started to drift off to sleep when the ground changed into a bumpy gravel road. Jostled from your seat your eyes flew open to the new terrain. All around you were large trees, the windows were pumping in fresh mountain air, and if you strained enough you could spy a lake in between the brush. 

“We’re just up here Sunshine,” Clyde moved the truck to the right of the road. Somehow spying a smaller dirt road that seemed to be handmade. You were very worried about fitting with the truck and the horse trailer but Clyde seemed to know the area like the back of his hand. 

Once at the end of the slim road, there was a flat opening that was a driveway leading up to a small cabin with an even smaller barn to the left of it. You sighed at the sight of the cabin, you weren’t sure if you were camping in a tent but you secretly hoped for plumbing. With what you planned to be doing up here with Clyde you were thankful a shower was nearby. 

Clyde parked and immediately opened his door to stretch his legs and start unpacking. Leroy had left your lap to follow his daddy, which left you to finally breathe and flex your left arm after being pinned. Climbing out you took in a deep breath, it was so beautiful up here. You knew that West Virginia was known for its beautiful landscape, and from your time in Montana, you were used to the mountains but it had been so long since you were outside. You felt yourself tearing up thinking about home, you hadn’t been back since Josh… no, you weren’t going to let your last relationship ruin this nice time with your new guy. 

“Darlin’ can ya help bring these inside? I gotta get the horses out,” Clyde motioned to the coolers in the truck bed. Smiling back up at him you maneuvered to the end of the truck and started emptying the supplies Clyde had brought. Walking up the steps to the cabin you admired how homey it looked. Truly it was a quaint cabin that held memories for the Logan family, you felt honored that Clyde had even brought you here. Walking in you noticed scratch marks in the doorway, with names under them. You spied Clyde’s name along with Jimmy and Mellie, and some unknown person Sadie. You grinned at the family memory that marked the place. 

After dropping off multiple bags inside you used your free time to search through the cabin. It was very homey, you were thankful that the cabin did indeed have plumbing. Some more snooping brought you to the bedroom you and Clyde were to share, the bed didn’t at all look big enough to have both of you in it. You also assumed that Leroy would weasel his way in which made it even less appealing. Huffing you started unpacking your bags when you heard Clyde come inside. You could hear his boots hitting the floor and a pause, he must be taking in the cabin like you were. You wondered how long it had been since he last came here, had he brought others here? You shook your head before you started jumping to conclusions, bounding out of the room you met Clyde and sealed your lips in a kiss. 

“When do we get to ride?” you said before giving him another quick kiss. Clyde hummed into your lips before wrapping his arms around your waist. “That’s why I was comin’ in Sunshine,” he pulled back and started raking over your figure. Taking in a deep breath he closed his eyes and gave you a slower, more thoughtful kiss which you eagerly reciprocated. However, before the fun could even begin Clyde pulled back. 

“Y’ better go get changed,” he leaned and kissed your forehead, “Y’ won’t want t’ ride with those shorts on.” 

You rushed into the bedroom after Clyde separated the two of you to gather bags for the ride. You and Mellie had shopped for plenty of outfits to choose from for the weekend. You decided on wearing a baby pink bikini underneath your clothes in case there was a chance of water play, and plus they were only held together by strings which could prove helpful… You also got some comfy bootcut jeans that sat nicely over your old riding boots and a very thin plaid button-up. Mellie had also insisted that you buy a cowgirl hat, saying that it would drive Clyde crazy since he would chase after rodeo girls when he was younger. Once you were ready you pranced outside and approached Clyde who was facing two horses. 

You tapped his shoulder and cleared your throat so he could turn and look at you. And look he did, you were sure his eyes were going to pop out of his head. He couldn’t keep himself from staring, his eyes roamed all over your figure and settled on the ample cleavage your top gave you. 

“Howdy Cowboy,” you smirked at him and tipped your hat, “Are you ready to ride?” 

Clyde swallowed hard before bringing his eyes back up to meet yours, “I got somethin’ fer y’ t’ ride.” 

You giggled and swayed over to his side and pecked his cheek, not letting him get too close since you were actually eager to get going. “Which ones mine,” you whispered before pulling back and patting the horses. 

“What,” Clyde practically choked when you left him high and dry.

“Which horse do I get Clyde,” you said, “Don’t tell me one of them is for Leroy.” 

He cleared his throat and turned to face the pair with you, “No no, this one here is mine,” he patted the buckskin colored horse, “An that one's yers.” 

“What are their names?” 

“This mustang is Spirit, and his mare there is Rain.” 

“Oh like that old movie!” you practically squealed, Spirit was one of your favorite horse movies growing up. You and your sister would watch it almost daily, along with Barbie Swan Lake. 

“Huh,” Clyde looked at you confused, “What’r y’ talkin’ about? Those their names because I liked em…” 

“You really haven’t seen the old horse movie about these exact two horses!?” 

Clyde just looked at you like you had lost your mind. You obviously had to drop the subject and force him to watch it at a later date because right now you were close to blowing up. “Whatever,” you rolled your eyes and began mounting Rain, “Let’s get going before it gets too hot.” 

Mirroring your actions Clyde climbed on Spirit swiftly and put on his own cowboy hat, “Don’t fall behind darlin’,” he winked before setting off leaving you in the dust. 

----- 

After riding for about 3 hours, Clyde had led you to a lakeshore. You had spent most of the early afternoon weaving through trees and up the mountain ridges. Rain was a very nimble horse and on more than one occasion you were able to outrun Clyde who would holler for you to stay close by, apparently, the ground was dangerous and ‘only he knew’ where it was safe. 

You dismounted at the shoreline, soaking in the sun and listening to the calm waves from the lake. It almost felt like a dream, being out here with Clyde. You weren’t sure of the last time you were able to have this kind of peace, certainly couldn’t remember the last time you rode a horse. But you were starting to see that being around Clyde would bring you simple pleasures you hadn’t allowed yourself in a while. Walking towards the sand you heard Clyde rustling through the bags that he brought, making a happy humming noise when he must’ve found what he was looking for. 

“Y’ mind helpin’ me set out this blanket,” he called from behind you. Turning around you saw he had a large blanket draped over his forearm, along with a small bag that was hiding supplies he must’ve packed. 

“Of course,” you smiled at him and grabbed the blanket. Spreading it out on the beach and then grabbing the bag from him while he got the horses some snacks and water. Settling down, the bag between your legs, you opened it up to see what he had brought. It was a pretty small bag, no larger than one of those cheap drawstring ones you would use as a child, but this one was a military green and seemed to be well used. It was heavy, heavier than you would think it should be, peeking inside you found bottles of water. Along with the water, there were a few beers, Clyde seemed to pack his favorite kind along with some fruity cocktails he must’ve thought you liked. You started unpacking the drinks, and underneath you found some little picnic items. After you had that all laid out there was still more in there. 

“Did you pack enough,” you called over your shoulder to him, because somehow he managed to pack an entire fridge worth of food. 

“What’re y’ doin’ over there?” 

“I’m unpacking this,” you raised the bag up, “Isn’t that what you meant for me to do?” 

Deciding not to delay the rest you dumped the contents into your lap. Out fell a leather journal, must be his you thought, along with a compass, flashlight, survival tools, and a strange velvet drawstring bag. You picked it up to inspect it more closely, it was a black bag, which had a couple of items inside. It didn’t seem like something you would bring out riding but maybe Clyde had a reason for it. Rolling your eyes and staring out at the waves you opened it and stuck your hand in. 

Cold. 

Curved. 

Metal. 

“What the fuck-” 

“Are you lookin’ through my stuff darlin’,” Clyde was suddenly behind you, snatching the black velvet bag from your hands. Huffing as he sat next to you and tucked it under his left leg. 

“What was that Clyde,” you waggled your eyebrows at him and reached over his lap to grab the item he swooped away from you. 

“It’s not yers,” he smiled back at you before leaning down and placing a kiss on your forehead. 

You huffed and crossed your arms over your chest, being sure to push out your breasts from your unbuttoned shirt. “Hmm,” you mused at him. 

“Could y’ hand me a beer darlin’, I’m thirsty after all that ridin’.” 

You pretended to not hear him, maybe the silent treatment would make him cave and show you the ‘surprise’ that he was hiding from you. “Sunshine?” he whispered again, hoping for your attention. You lifted your chin and looked off at the water, pretending again that he wasn’t there. 

“(Y/N) are you really poutin’ cause I took the bag from y’?” 

“Maybe.” 

Clyde huffed in amusement, reaching across your lap for a beer, making sure to skim the top of your left knee in the process. He settled once again, stretching his legs out and cracking open his beer. Humming after his first slow sip, glancing out at the mountains across the water. Maybe the silent treatment wasn’t a good idea, Clyde was already a man of little words, he must thrive off the quiet mountain air. You started thrumming your fingers to try and shake his calm, slowly getting louder and louder with your little movements. At some point, he was going to snap and finally give in to you. 

After 5 more chugs from his beer, he finally cleared his throat, halting you from your cacophony of noises. “I didn’ tell y’ earlier, but y’ look very pretty darlin’.” 

“Hmm,” you replied, not trying to be swayed by his honeyed words. 

Clyde chuckled and scooted closer to you, draping his arm around your shoulders, “I especially like yer shirt, it lookt very bouncy while we were ridin’.” 

You tried to hide your smile, of course, it was ‘bouncy’ because you had on a bikini top underneath. Your tits were practically screaming from being pushed up and down while Rain was trotting across the trails. In hindsight, it was not a good decision to wear the top, but damn you did look tantalizing. You turned to face Clyde, being sure to let your top open a little bit more, showing the suit underneath. “Well aren’t you a gentleman,” you whispered at him, bringing up a palm to rest on his chest. Clyde took that as an in and swooped in, capturing your lips in a kiss. 

You couldn’t help but moan into him, sweet lips pressing and sucking on your own. Tongue darting out to press to your own, begging for entrance to explore your mouth. Eagerly you obliged, savoring the sweet hoppy taste of his tongue, slightly pressing on his chest causing him to lay back as softly as he could. Once he was down he brought his right hand up to your lower back, pressing you into him as you now straddled him with both legs. You pulled away just a little, glancing down at Clyde’s face, his lips were all flushed, wet, and pink while his eyes were lazily opening and shutting. Trying to register the bliss that was your shared tastes. Quickly you used his confusion to reach under his left leg and grabbed the black bag. 

Springing off of him you ran towards the water giggling, trying to quickly figure out the contents of the velvet sack. Sticking your hand in again you met with the toys inside, not noticing that you were now in the shallow water. Soaking your boots and the ends of your jeans. Through your giggles, you now were able to inspect the objects more thoroughly, there were two items. One was a small smooth metal plug* of some sort and the other was a bottle of… 

Lube**. 

Clyde brought lube. 

You stared at the items in your hand for a long time. What the fuck was going on? Why did he bring these, on a horseback riding trip for starters? Was the lube why he asked about your allergies? Why was there a butt plug… what kinda shit was this cowboy expecting? You were so lost in your train of thought you didn’t even hear Clyde run after you into the water. Suddenly you were being lifted up from an arm wrapping around your waist, and another hand was taking the prizes from your grasp. “Y’ know it’s rude t’ open presents early Sunshine,” he chuckled while walking back to the blanket. 

Your eyes widened, was he planning on giving you these? It wasn’t like you were opposed to them, it was the opposite in fact. You had hoped that this trip was going to take your relationship to the next level. You had even mentioned it to Clyde the other day over text, and he knew that you wanted to set boundaries before the two of you continued down that road. But this just seemed so sudden and out of character for him, he was usually so timid and shy around you. Unless you took into account the morning the two of you were buried between the other’s legs, which surely wasn’t the shy man you had grown to know. 

Clyde plopped you down on the blanket, situating himself between your legs. Sitting back on his heels while holding the toys in his metal hand. “I’m sorry Clyde, I didn’t think they were… you know for me?” 

“Hmm,” he responded, trying to keep his gaze away from yours. He was clearly embarrassed, his plan of giving these to you didn’t go as he wanted it to. You reached up and placed your hands on his cheeks, forcing him to make eye contact. “Clyyyddddeeee,” you cooed, trying to get him to smile at you, “I’m not upset at them, just more surprised really.” 

“I’m sorry darlin’,” he huffed, “I was hidin’ em in my bag so y’ wouldn’ find em when y’ unpacked earlier. Was supposed t’ be fer later…” 

“Oh yeah,” you raised your eyebrows and leaned in to give him a small kiss on the chin, “When were you gonna give them to me, Daddy?” 

Clyde let out a huge sigh, the nickname you used seemed to melt his anxiety right away. He tucked his chin and brought his lips back to yours, hungrier than before. “Right after I asked y’ t’ be my woman,” he mumbled into your mouth. Wrapping his right arm around your waist and pressing you flush with his torso. You hummed into his kiss, working your mouths in tandem with one another. One of your hands slid up his face to tangle in his locks, pulling and knotting with his curls, while the other was skating down his chest. Feeling his muscles flex and relax with every movement forward. Silently coaxing you to lay back on the blanket, to which you obliged. 

With Clyde towering over you he broke your kiss and trailed light kisses along your neck. Making his way towards your chest, you started to unbutton your flannel so he could have better access. Clyde began nibbling and sucking into the supple flesh of your breasts, the more skin exposed to him, the more desperate his moans were. With your shirt finally opened all the way, Clyde brought his hand up to the bikini, softly squeezing and rubbing his thumb back and forth over your hardening nipples. 

“As pretty as this color is on y’, can this come off?” he mumbled between your breasts. You moaned back a yes and Clyde made quick work of untying the top knot of the suit, allowing the fabric to snag and catch on your erect nipples. Clyde leaned back on his knees, taking in the sight of your exposed chest, settling the toys he had been holding in his left hand and beginning to unbutton his own shirt. 

You sat up with him and threw off the rest of your tops, moving towards your drying boots. By the time Clyde had his shirt and undershirt off you were wrestling out of your jeans, eager to be bare before him. He grabbed your hands from your zipper, “Now hold on there, y’ didn’t answer my question.” 

“What question?” 

A deep exhale through his nose, “bout bein’ y’know…” he trailed off and threw his eyes to the side. 

“Clyde are you going to tell me or do I have to guess?” 

“Bout bein’ my lady (Y/N),” he looked at you with wide eyes, “I know y’ didn’ want t’ be doin’ stuff without a label n’ I’ve wanted y’ as mine fer some time.” 

Oh yeah, you thought. You had brought this up over the phone about a week ago since you didn’t want to just be a fling with Clyde, he was a genuine man and you wanted to know him as a partner. But this was the moment he decided to ask you? Both of you half-naked on a beach, you just finding sex toys in his bag, and with horses 20 feet away. 

You cleared your throat and reached out for Clyde’s face, grabbed his cheeks and gently tugged him down to you. “Of course Clyde, as long as that means you’re mine too,” you leaned up and gave him a soft and slow kiss making sure to memorize his lips. 

“I wouldn’t have it any other way Sunshine,” he smiled into your kiss before pressing you down to deepen it. Clyde moved his metal arm behind your back, seeming to cradle you against the ground while his other hand skated across your bare chest, pawing at your nipples before sliding down your stomach towards your jeans. You hummed into his mouth, coaxing grunts and groans as your hips bucked upwards to his touch. Clyde pulled at your buttons and soon was sliding his hand under your swimsuit bottoms.

You moaned into his touch, callused fingertips softly rubbing your folds. Getting slicked up with your arousal, you couldn’t help but gyrate your hips to his fingers, hoping for more friction. “Let’s get these off y’,” he whispered before breaking your kiss and turning towards your lonely breasts. You quickly wrestled your legs out of your jeans, shucking down your bikini too leaving you bare before him. Pressing on his chest you moved Clyde back onto his heels, hands moving towards his belt. 

A few moments later Clyde was up on his feet, throwing off his boots and frantically trying to get out of his jeans. You watched him, memorizing each muscle that rippled as he moved, you brought a hand down to your core to rub at your clit. Clyde’s eyes caught your wandering hand, “Go on an get yerself ready fer yer Daddy,” he pulled down his boxers finally releasing his aching cock. Your eyes widened at the sight, you had forgotten how big he was. His huge cock was swinging freely between his powerful legs, jutting out from his body with a slight curve upwards at the tip. It was hard and leaking precum, desperate to be buried in your tight pussy. He brought a hand to it and lazily started to pump himself while getting down on his knees in front of you. 

“Gimme yer hand,” he growled, reaching for your hand to replace his. Slicking up his length with your leftover wetness. Clyde moaned at your touch, hand barely able to fit around his girth. You brought your other hand below to cup his balls, heavy and begging to be played with. You leaned down and brought them to your mouth, moaning at the sweet-savory taste they held. You licked and sucked on them gently causing Clyde to throw his hand backward in pleasure. Your hands were lazily pumpkin him in time with your sucking. Taking one ball into your mouth and softly applying pressure with your tongue before popping it out loudly and moving to the next. Clyde’s metal hand came down to caress your hair while you continue your assault on his sack. 

“Spread yer legs baby,” his hand dropped down to your core. Trailing up and down your slit, collecting more of it on his fingertips. Paying extra attention to your entrance before dropping his fingers down lower towards your tight asshole. He gently pressed on your ring, earning a groan from you, and then trailing his fingers back up and sinking his middle finger into your core. 

“Oh fuck,” you moaned, “yes Daddy, yessss.” 

You pulled back from his balls, continuing your drag of his cock with one hand while the other was reaching for the lube bottle he brought. Clyde was pumping you full with his one finger but you were desperate for more. “Here baby,” you said while squeezing some on his fingers while they were pulled out, adding to the already delicious squelch coming from your pussy. Clyde groaned and proceeded to shove two fingers into your heat. Cock thrusting into your palm while you spit on his length to add to his precum. 

“Get on y’r hands and knees, let Daddy see y’ from behind,” he pulled back and waited for you to move. Quickly scrambling up on all fours, spreading your legs wide enough so he could get a glimpse of your wet folds, sticking your ass in the air. “Like this Daddy?” you asked breathless in anticipation. 

Clyde brought up his metal hand to your lower back, pressing it down causing your back to curve even more. Your ass was now directly in front of him, close enough to taste. 

And taste he did, bringing his lips up to your cheeks, being sure to bite and suck fresh marks into the supple skin. You moaned at the rough treatment, bucking back into him. He brought another hand up to spread your wetness from your folds up to your tight ring. Kissing your left cheek while he pressed again on your asshole, getting it all lubed up from your core. 

“Please Clyde, you’re driving me crazy. I need you,” you cried out trying to move his hand more and more. You needed him to fuck you, needed him to do really anything. You were so riled up. One last kiss to your cheek and he pulled back, settling on his knees behind you. “Since you' asked so nicely,” he lined his cock up at your entrance, “Try t’ be quiet, don’ wanna spook the horses.” 

He pushed in, fully sheathing his cock inside you with one thrust. The sheer stretch and length of him knocked the wind out of your lungs. Feeling like you could cum then and there. He pulled back just enough to keep the tip inside and placed both hands on your hips. Pressing back inside you, again and again, being sure to not pull out entirely. 

You were a moaning and crying mess, trying desperately to keep your voice down. Clyde was no different, each clench of your pussy around his cock made him groan. The sick slapping of skin filled the air around you. If anyone was floating on the water they sure were getting a show from the shoreline. Clyde was pounding into you like it was the last thing he would ever do, being sure to snap his hips back into harder and harder each time. You were so close, you propped yourself up on your hands and looked at him over your shoulder. 

He was a mess, hair stuck to his forehead from the sweat. His pale skin was blushed from the chest all the way to the tips of his ears. He was grunting and groaning, watching his cock sink into your tight little pussy with each stroke. Looking up at you he smiled, leaning over you and capturing your lips in a small kiss, being sure to keep his pace even. You reached a hand down between your legs and started rubbing your clit, instantly clenching on him when you made contact. 

“Jesus fuck (Y/N), cum on my cock,” he panted, “Fuckin’ y’r so tight, please cum on me.” His begging was all you needed, you rubbed and rubbed being sure to keep in time with Clyde's thrusts. “Oh fuck Clyde I’m… I’ mm-” 

Your eyes rolled back into your head. Shoving your head down onto the blanket to hide your screams. You were clenching all around him, gushing on his length. Clyde roared as you came, coaxing his own release out of his cock. Pushing his hot sticky cum deep inside you where no one else had gone. His thrusts became slower and slower as you both came down from your high. Clyde leaned forward and softly kissed your shoulder, pulling out while he did. Your pussy squelched once he was out, begging to be filled again. Cum was pushed out of you, sticking to your legs. 

Rolling on your side you were breathless looking at Clyde. He was laying on his left side, head angled to lay on the ground. Breathing heavily and just staring at you like you were the most important thing in the world. His eyes were dancing all across your face, memorizing the sweat and tears that had fallen on your cheeks. 

“That was amazing,” you said after finally catching your breath. 

“Better than I imagined,” he smiled at you. You couldn’t stop staring at each other, not wanting to move from your cocoon of post-sex bliss. Nothing in the world mattered now but the two of you. Behind you, Spirit snorted at you both causing Clyde to break contact with you and acknowledge the horses. “We should probably pack up, Leroy’s probably torn the place apart with us bein’ gone so long.” 

You hummed at him and began sitting up, grabbing your respective clothes in silence. Once the both of you were dressed and the bag was repacked Clyde grabbed your hand and kissed it, “We should ride back slow, don’ want y’ bein’ sore.” 

You snorted at him and put on your hat, “I think I’ll be okay, boyfriend.” 

TAGLIST: @finn-ray-nal-beads​ @morby​ @clumsycopy​ @onlykyloscenes​ @desiraypark​ @kirah36​ @candycanes19​ 

*Here is the plug he brought us ;): https://sextoynerds.com/reviews/njoy-pure-plug-stainless-steel/

**Here is the lube he brought, it's actually a really great lube. I use it along with another: https://www.adameve.com/sex-lubes/anal-sex-lubes/sp-sliquid-naturals-sassy-lubricating-gel-92290.aspx

[datingintampafails]

Chapter 32: Timmy*

Timmy* gave off a frat-boy kind of vibe with the pictures in his profile, a trope that has become my type. His profile did seem to be half-heartedly filled out; his hometown was just the abbreviation of the state, his employment simply said "cardiac surgery," and a couple typos.

Mostly my reason for wanting to message him, in particular, was that one of his prompts about a travel story was very obviously cut off and he ran out of characters. I messaged him saying the cliffhanger was dramatic and wanted to hear the whole story. It was a very long story, involving being in Ireland and a random person coming into his and his family member’s room. I mentioned I didn’t have anything quite that interesting regarding my travels before. We chatted more and although I wouldn’t say we had a lot of similar hobbies and interests, the conversation did flow well. He was definitely more active than I, going to the gym often and eating pretty healthy and en mass. Very much a gym bro type. I also had assumed he was a surgeon, given his position being cardiac surgery, but then learned later he was more involved in some sort of programming instead for cardiac devices, so not really cardiac surgery per se.

When we moved away from Hinge and onto text messaging, we were both mutually behaving as if we had known each other a while, and better than we did. At one point, he had asked, “are you a guy version of me?” To which, I was very aware of how little we knew about each other, which led me to respond that it was too soon to tell.

I did however confirm my place as forever the more aggressive one; I text him one day "Timmy*, when they fuck are we going out?" Not that it had been too much of a long time talking, but just that he had not yet made a move, and that we were obviously getting along and it would make sense for us to take that next step. We plan for a few days from then, a Tuesday, after work, and that it would have to be more or less played by ear because of our jobs' schedules being semi-unpredictable. My easy place, Armature Works, was chosen as where we would meet up.

Our date got pushed back slightly, as I got off on time, but he was going to be held up at work later than expected. He did however give me ample heads up, so I just relaxed at home a little longer than I would have otherwise, and perfected my outfit and minimal make-up. The day of the date, and leading up to it, I made jokes about being a catfish and that I was actually a middle-aged, fat, Russian man. I continued this while I waited for him when I was describing what outfit I was wearing so he could recognize me better with my mask on, then later added that I was still a middle-aged Russian man, but that I was still wearing a skirt and crop top. I waited for him on a bench for almost 30 minutes. I arrived on time to when he had delayed the date, but still too early apparently. Luckily, I had brought my headphones, so I just listened to some music to pass the time by.

Finally, I received a text message saying that he had parked and then that he could see me. Nothing is more uncomfortable than being seen and not seeing who is looking at you. I looked around and didn't see anyone that looked like him, so I went back to staring at my phone. Eventually, a man looking more like him appeared trotting down the small set of stairs next to me. Although he definitely wasn't short, he seemed shorter than what I was expecting, and his hairline seemed to be just starting to recede.

He was not familiar with the location as much as I am, so I took it upon myself to give him a tour of the location. Despite being indoors, and still pretty amidst a pandemic in late February, Timmy* kept taking his mask off. As a healthcare worker, I was confused and appalled; he should know better. I yelled at him every time to put it back on. Once he said, "you're one of those huh?" I almost rolled my eyes back into my head. Then he also asked me, "well when can I take it off?" to which I responded, "when we are outside and/or we sit down to eat/drink." He got a beer at one of the bars, and it was a beer that had some marijuana in it, which was an interesting choice. After having toured the whole place, it was time to split off to order our respective meals. I got my food, and a drink, and wandered over to the area I had last seen him, as he had said he was going to get a pizza. He was nowhere to be found, so I text him asking where he was. He indicated that he was over by where he had gotten his beer.

I found him and then he told me that he had ordered food from two different restaurants because he couldn't decide and also eats so much due to his athleticism. We found a spot to sit nearby outside, and it is a lovely night, we were comfortable in the fresh air. We both finally did take off our masks and started to eat.

I half-heartedly apologized for being so hard on him regarding the mask-wearing, but emphasized that I am passionate about proper mask-wearing because of my experience with having the virus and wanting to make sure to reduce the spread. He then said, "Oh you had COVID! I'm in a way glad to hear it." He then pauses before saying, "I have COVID too. My doctor said I'm asymptomatic? So I'm totally good." My eyes must have gotten the size of saucers; I leaned away from him and was looking around seeing if anyone had heard him. "Wait what?" Is all I could say. "Uh, no. Please tell me you're joking?" Timmy* stares at me confused, "I'm asymptomatic! So that means like I don't have it."

I am prepared to leave immediately. "So you had a positive test? What? Why are you here right now?" I say. Finally, he drops the rouse and admits he was kidding, but that he got me. "That was not funny. I was legitimately terrified!" So far, this date is bizarre. He mentions that because I joked around so much that I would appreciate it. I did not.

We eat our food and chat. Unfortunately, he also is a person who seems to eat with their mouth open. Another strike. Timmy* has become very comfortable around me, as he also decides to tell me another long story about the time he was "sexually assaulted by a doctor." Which was that he went to a doctor for a physical and that she had grabbed his testicles and had him cough, though the way he told it was extremely drawn out and had many mini-stories leading up to the point that was supposed to be the assault. I then told him, "I'm sorry to say that your doctor was not trying to hit on you on anything, that is a normal thing that happens with mens' checkups." This was news to him. It was obvious that he is not a well-versed healthcare worker.

Once we finished our food, I suggested we walk along the river. First, though, I wanted to drop off my leftovers in my car. We walk to it and I make him guess what kind of car I drive. He is impressed by my car and we don't linger long before I say we should leave the parking lot. He tells me that he has a muscle car, which is so random and I would never put him in a car like that. Whereas a sixteen-year-old girl might be googoo-gaga over this, as a full-grown adult, it isn't quite as alluring to have a car like that.

While on the riverwalk, I become irritated at the fact that he walks very slow. Slower than I am able to walk. It makes no sense as I am significantly shorter than he is, so my strides shouldn't be longer than his. I mention to him that he walks slow and I ask that he walk a little faster. He picked up the pace, but then slowly reverted to his tortoise-like speed over time. I tire of our uneven velocities and we take a seat on some rock benches. We chat about brief things and I suggest we walk back. Again, I battle with the paces, mention it a couple more times that I am unable to walk as slow as he walks.

We get back to the main area of Armature and take a seat in some oversized chairs. He tells me about his family and some stories about his relationships in middle school and high school, which are also drawn out and bizarre. It nears 10pm, and we are told by staff that they close at 10. A couple minutes til, I remind him we need to leave and I ask where he parked. He parked in a different lot, I offered to walk him to his car. He offers to drive me to my car. We do so and his muscle car is indeed very overly-masculine. He goes on to go through a bunch of random songs on Spotify, only playing each song for less than 30 seconds, very ADHD-like. He drives me to my car, but wants to keep me there, again showing me more songs. I'm politely just listening as he flexes on all the types of music he listens to. He tries to show off that he knows "alternative music," my preferred genre, but I point out that a lot of the songs he's playing are more "pop-punk" or just old alternative jams.

He compliments my music taste and mentions that he has noticed I am adept at knowing song names, musicians, movies, and so forth. I begin to joke that likely I am a little autistic, adding "I'm working on my eye contact," as I make direct eye contact with him. What he says next, is something that I was not prepared for, and something that still baffles me, and possibly always will. "Yeah, you do look a little retarded." Immediately, I burst out into laughter; not because I think what he said was funny, but because I am so bewildered and shocked by what was just said. Eventually, through the laughter tears I am able to get out, "Dude you shouldn't say that to a woman." He insists it was a joke and makes excuses, but I keep laughing, with my hand on the door handle just waiting for a good moment to step out. I repeat that what he said isn't cool, and eventually stop laughing long enough to say, "alright, on that note, I think I should head out." Being friendly, I still ask that he tell me when he gets home since I know he has a longer commute home than I do. I wave goodbye through our car windows.

The formalities are complete; he texts me ever so briefly the next day, respectfully I respond, knowing well I never plan on going out with him again. Then it seems we have a mutual ghosting situation, as I don't try to text him, nor he to me. This day I have another date, and after that one, I have no one that I want to communicate with as that is also a dud. All is good until a few days later when I am out with my friends in Ybor, drunk. I get a text from Timmy* saying "yo." I lament and groan and my friends ask about my reaction. I explain the situation and one of my guy friends asks for my phone. I hand it to him as he starts to text him on my behalf.

My phone is with my friend, but with my Apple Watch, I can see the text conversation and when he is responding. I start yelling "oh god please don't bring him here. I don't want to see this guy." Respecting my wishes, my friend decides to still fuck with him, but prevent this poor soul from spending money on an Uber and coming down.

My friends then send a selfie of themselves, with me not in it, saying "she's with me." I yell at them more saying, let this guy be, just ignore him. However, instead, my friend takes it a step further.

I tell my friend that he was too harsh and that I of course would have told him I wasn't interested, but a lot more mature and kindly. When later I check, understandably Timmy* has unmatched me on Hinge*, likely blocked my number. No loss there though.

[syms-things-5]

Clear The Area: Chapter Three

Previous chapter HERE

Warning: Not explicit (yet); some mild language.

Summary: 29-year-old nurse Sarah Bernette has worked hard to get where she is. Moving to Boston from a nowhere dump of a town, she’s studied hard and is grateful her stress is finally paying off. Despite being fostered repeatedly throughout her childhood, she’s since found some comfort in the form of her adopted parents, Jocelyn and Noah, and a pseudo-adoptive family of sorts in form of the Evans clan who have treated her as one of her own ever since she moved in with best friend, Shanna. Valuing them above all else, she appreciates their support even more when her long lost birth mother decides to reappear in her life after so many years, and is surprised to find out just how supportive Chris is in particular. As she struggles to maintain a firm grip on both her professional and private lives, she finds an ill-advised solace in her growing mutual attraction with him but how long before everything unravels and threatens to pull the rug out from underneath her?

Note: I apologise for my spelling/grammar errors.

CHAPTER THREE

“So, completely, out of the blue, just like that, she’s asked the courts to intervene to ask you to meet her?”

Sarah was sat with Audrey on their break at Joe’s across the street from the ER. It was a favourite haunt of theirs; it was cheap but the coffee was always strong, always hot, and the waffles were to die for. Plus, the chef was so supportive of staff, he would insist on giving them double the amount of toppings. Sarah contemplated using them as wedding caterers should it ever some to that. The location also gave them the added bonus of being far enough away from their work that they felt like it gave them a decent break when they could eventually find a spare 5 minutes, and clandestine enough that they could freely complain about the latest regulations imposed upon them by O’ Brien, the Ward Co-ordinator, and his questionable personal hygiene.

“Fuck me, the nerve.” Audrey shook her head in bewilderment. “You’d think she’d have taken the hint the first time around.”

“Well, there’s always the possibility she thought her letters might not have reached me and now she’s just trying to cover her bases.” Sarah suggested, taking another drink of her piping hot coffee and feeling course through her body, a comforting warmth for the first time that day. She was struck in that moment by her own empathy for this woman. She wasn’t sure what it meant.

“Don’t go making excuses for her. It’s arrogant is what it is, paying for some fancy lawyer to do her bidding. If she wanted to do right by you, she would have responded all those years ago when it was you reaching out to her. Don’t you take pity on her now. You have to make it clear to them, the lawyers or whoever the fuck this is, that you’re happy, you’re in a good place, and you have all the fucking family you need,” Audrey emphasised each point by stabbing her finger on the table. “You need whatever bullshit she is selling.”

Rarely did Audrey mince her words. She could be relied on to tell you straight exactly what she thought and at several times during their friendship, Sarah counted her blessings that she was on the right side of her. 

“Yes, yeh, of course.” she lied. Perhaps lied. She wasn’t sure what she was thinking in that moment. At various times during the days since she had received the notice, she’s swung back and forth between rejecting their request outright or taking the opportunity to see what she was like in the flesh, to see whether she was anything like she had pictured in her mind. Just to satisfy her curiosity at least. Shan suggested they should arrange to meet her and perform some sort of “drive by” and run away at the last minute. As more and more time went by, Sarah found herself warming to that suggestion.

“What do your folks think about it?” Audrey asked.

“I don’t know. I haven’t told them about it yet. They’re in town next weekend so I’ll wait and tell them in person I think.”

Audrey nodded in understanding, pouring them what was left of their coffee pot. “I take it you’ve told Shan about this?”

“Yeh but we don’t get a lot of time to discuss things at the moment. More like passing ships in the night.”

“Oh right, I forgot. Cap’s back. How is it going? Is he still hanging out at yours?”

Sarah nodded and watching Audrey’s eyes light up, looking giddier than she’d ever seen before.

“How is he looking? Like, abs wise? I bet there isn’t an inch of fat on him. I bet he walks around in his towel, all wet after a shower. Still buff as hell, right?” She flashed Sarah the naughtiest smile she could muster. She swore Audrey was imagining him right at this very minute.

“Can I remind you that you have a very real and very lovely husband at home?” Sarah playfully jabbed her friend with her fork.

“Don’t tell mer you haven’t noticed.”

“How do you expect me to answer that?” Sarah protested, her voice reaching a little too high for her liking and she could sense Audrey’s doubt in her declaration. “For your information, I haven’t really spoken to him much since he got back.”

“Y’know, I like my husband a normal amount but if I was single and living in close proximity to that, I’d be all over that shit.”

Funnily enough, Sarah didn’t doubt that for a second. She’d seen up close and personal her flirtatious remarks to him after she’d been forced into introductin them some years earlier. She marvelled at how shy she’d become when she was typically so verbose and confident. Things progressed quite quickly that evening thanks to the shots he kept pouring for them and the arm she kept draped across his wide shoulders, practically sat in his lap. He wasn’t complaining one bit. She recalled fond memories of a random video recorded on Audrey’s phone that was meant to be a ‘Happy Birthday’ message to Michael but instead became an example of what not to show your husband when hanging out with an A-List Movie Star. Aside from the occasional political rant and last night’s episode of Jimmy Fallon, Chris was often Audrey’s favourite topic of conversation when he was in town.

“You know why he does that.” Audrey hinted before taking the last few bites of her waffles, feigning innocence.

Sarah knew where this train was going and was keen to stop it before it derailed and killed innocent passengers. “We need to get back. I have an x-ray to collect and you have a bladder irrigation in cubicle two.” Audrey’s shoulders dropped and she grimaced at the thought.

As they were heading back, they narrowly avoided colliding with Greg seemingly leaving for the day. Sarah would soon regret her jibes as Audrey made an unmistakably loud call-out in his direction. He may have just about escaped her clutches but turned to swagger his way back towards them, grinning widely.

“Hey guys, how’s it going?” He asked coolly, and to his credit he seemed genuinely interested. Sarah had thought he only reserved that kind of over-interest for consultants who might be able to further his career but perhaps she’d been too quick to judge him after all.

“Yeh, it’s going really well, thanks. How are you? You finished for the day?”

Sarah inwardly groaned. Audrey was going somewhere with this.

“Just heading home to get changed and then probably just head for the gym, I think. Might try and get a game of tennis in if I can.” He held up his bag to indicate his racket was inside. Sarah saw the label for YSL.

“Oh, you play tennis? How funny! So does Sarah!” Sarah figured she might have played twice in her entire life and one of those occasions ended in her swearing never again to pick up a racket. “Oh my god, Sarah, can you believe this? Such a small world. Sarah was the team at her college in fact.”

How could Greg not notice the insincerity?

“Really? Hey, y’know, if you’re free sometime, I’d love to have a match or two,” he smiled widely at Sarah as she died a little inside. “I haven’t managed to find anyone here who plays yet so it would be good to make a friend at least.”

Sarah spotted the earnestness in his eyes and almost felt a little sorry for him. Nevertheless, she nodded along in the hopes of ending the conversation as quickly as possible so she could get inside and stab Audrey with a scalpel. It wasn’t that she didn’t like Greg. He was perfectly nice, very ambitious with the intelligence to match, and even under the harsh lights of the Ambulance Bay, he was clearly a very attractive man; all height, with not a hair out of place. It was more her issue than his. According to Audrey, she was unsure of herself around overly good-looking men. Audrey first pointed this out to her when they were on a night out. She said a lack of self-esteem somewhere inside her meant that she automatically wrote herself off whenever it came to guys she deemed herself to be unworthy of. Then Audrey - and she may have been drunk at this point, Sarah couldn’t quite remember herself - insisted on writing out a list of pros that started with green eyes and ended with her “impressive butt”. She laughed when Audrey told her that she somehow made scrubs look fashionable and not dowdy, and that she should treat herself once in a while to an item of clothing that wasn’t a hoodie or a pair of jeggings.

“Well, I’m sure that could be arranged,” Audrey winked at him, and Greg seemed agreeable to that idea. “You’re not doing anything tomorrow night, are you Sarah?”

“Um,” she really tried hard to wrack her brains but came up short. “No, not that I can think of right at this moment.”

“Well, great, maybe meet you at Roxbury Gym tomorrow night? I have a membership that lets me bring friends and family so there’d be no problem.”

Of course he did.

“Er, yes, OK. Sounds good. Just don’t go hoping for Open standard or anything. It’s been some time since I played.” She directed that last comment squarely at Audrey who had never looked prouder of her work. Greg smiled at them again and wished them both a good afternoon before backing away and heading to his car, his bag swung confidently over his shoulder.

“Wow, thank you.” Sarah said sarcastically.

“Hey, you can thank me later, sugar.”

*

It was just after eight when she got home. Shan was working late so Chris had texted her to ask if she wanted to share a pizza that evening and she’d agreed like it was the greatest idea in the world. It was actually paying off now that Chris was there most of the time; if he wasn’t keeping the fridge stocked with beer and various groceries, she’d found him hoovering the hallway the day before, apropos of nothing.

He wasn’t immediately present when she entered the apartment. She dumped her bag by the door and collected some post from the side table Shan had left for her.  The TV was on low on C-Span and she spied two scripts on the coffee table, one looking vaguely Marvel-ish. She dare not look at it in case there was a microdot inbred into every page that would alert them to intruders touching the paper. Or it was fingerprint-sensitive. Also, she genuinely wanted to be surprised when she would inevitably see it at the cinema. She’d been invited to a premiere on one occasion and Chris found it both hilarious and endearing that she turned him down, preferring to see it in a packed screening with honest movie fans instead of critics with annoying lights at the end of their pens. She also didn’t want to embarrass herself in front of Mark Ruffalo but she kept that nugget to herself.

Just as she was heading towards the bathroom to wash up before dinner, Chris emerged from Shan’s bedroom, a towel slung low on his waist, a slight steam rising off his skin. Sarah couldn’t stop the knowing laugh from escaping her.

“Ouch. Thanks.” Chris retorted.

“Oh no,” She realised how that sounded. “It wasn’t anything, y’know. Um, it wasn’t, um...” Sarah’s brain had stopped working and she became increasingly aware of time passing very slowly with Chris just staring at her. “I was talking to Audrey about something earlier and you just reminded me is all.”

“Oh, Audrey, nice. How is she?” That seemed to change his attention for the better, thankfully.

“Married.”

Chris snickered to himself. “Man, she loves you, y’know. You’re lucky. She seems like a good friend.”

��Yeh, I know. She’s great. Not many friends would work so hard on setting me up on a date.” Sarah had only intended to say that last part under her breath as she turned to head into the bathroom.

“A date?! You?”

It was evidently now Sarah’s turn to feel affronted. “Yes, me. Why so surprised?”

“Not surprised at all. Just. OK, yeh, surprised, but only a little bit. You always seem so quiet on that front. I actually can’t remember the last time you went on a date.”

“That’s not a helpful comment, Chris.”

“Daniel!” Chris clicked his fingers. “It was Daniel and he rode to work on a skateboard!” He was momentarily proud of his powers of recall until he noticed the look on Sarah’s face. “He was nice. He liked....stuff.”

Sarah couldn’t keep up the pretence any longer. “I remember he had an unnatural obsession with onion rings,” She laughed. ‘It took me forever to disinfect the place of the smell!”

Chris laughed heartily at the memory. “Well, I hope whoever this new guy is, he’s worthy of you.”

She was grateful for the nudge and he smiled back at her. “Pizza will be another 10 minutes I reckon, so be quick.”

Sarah shot him the finger guns in acknowledgement, regretted the finger guns, then closed the bathroom door behind her. She toyed with the idea of getting a shower but really, really wanted pizza before Chris had the opportunity to devour it. His appetite was truly off the charts when he wasn’t in training mode. She couldn’t quite believe what he could put away or where it ended up because it certainly made no difference to his physique.

As she re-emerged fresh and in a change of clothes, Chris was laying out the pizza and beers on the coffee table. She rarely ate anywhere other than at the kitchen table but Chris told her to live a little and relax. She followed the delicious smell of pepperoni and garlic bread and quickly gave in.

“So who’s the new guy?” Chris asked when they were both a couple of bites in.

“Just this guy from work. He’s new to Newton’s but only there for a few more weeks I think. Audrey is obsessed with setting me up with him. What?” She spotted Chris’ growing smirk stretch across his face. “Seriously, what is it?”

“So he’s not gonna be there for long? Never had you down as a hit-it-and-quit-it kind of girl before.” She could tell he was trying hard not to burst out laughing. 

“Great, so first I’m not dating at all and now I’m only interested in serious relationships?”

Chris held his hands up in protest. “There’s nothing wrong with that by the way! It works for me. If the girl is into it, even better.”

“It’s different for guys, though. You can get away with it because it’s assumed you’re naturally immature. For women, it’s like... we’re immoral or something.” She picked a large red pepper from her slice, placing it on her plate only for Chris to pick it back up again and add it to his. “The bar is held a lot higher for us, you have to admit.”

“Yes, perhaps. But there’s nothing wrong with enjoying sex without the pressure of asking yourself so many questions afterwards. You don’t have to see them again if you don’t want to. You don’t even have to learn their names. So long as it’s safe, just enjoy it for what it is. I don’t think there is anything immoral about that.” He shrugged.

Sarah smiled at him. “Is this what got you here?” She had only meant that as a passing joke but recent events had completely slipped her mind. Chris paused mid-bite unsure of how to respond. Sarah turned towards him fully prepared to apologise. “Mate, I’m-”

“Don’t worry about it. God knows, I deserve it.” He wiped his fingers with a napkin. “It was what it was.”

Sarah wasn’t sure if that was an admission of sorts and was unsure of how to respond. He could see the thoughts crossing through her mind and nodded slowly, wordlessly answering the question he wanted to ask but was too wary to do so. He hadn’t felt much like talking of late preferring the relative comfort found at the bottom of a beer bottle or glass of whisky. Scott, his friends, his sisters, everybody had worked out quickly enough that it was a topic he did not want to discuss. Everybody except his mom, that is. He readily acknowledged that he had been avoiding the conversation but also a growing awareness that his relationship with Jenny had been possibly symptomatic of something else he’d been trying to avoid of late: that he was getting older and had little understanding of what he wanted to do or where exactly he wanted to be. Sarah also didn’t want to put herself in a position his mother might be better suited towards. 

“It’s so stupid.” He shook his head, resigned. He took another deep breath before picking up his beer bottle contemplating taking a mouthful. “Things just got out of hand. It’s my own fault. I should have thought more first instead of running into things. You think I’m stupid, don’t you?”

“No, not at all.” She tried to sound as genuine as possible and he was grateful. She never thought he was an idiot. Naive maybe, but not an idiot. “I’ve know you long enough to know that you’re not a bad person. Plus, y’know, it takes two as they say. Look, I’m probably not the best person to advise on this kind of thing anyway.”

He seemed grateful for the brief assurance. “I think you’re better than you think you are.”

She attempted to change the subject. “So, you’re back filming next month?”

“Yeh, just for a few days hopefully.” He decided to follow her lead. “Then I’m free for a while. Should be easy enough.” He seemed to relax a little more physically at the thought of his impending freedom. The immense financial security meant he tended to take longer breaks between projects now, and he was a little fussier about the project when he did eventually choose to work again. “Shan said you folks were coming this weekend?”

“Next weekend now, but yeh. Looking forward to it. I haven’t really spoken to them much recently and Dad’s been so busy lately and Mom’s worrying about his blood pressure again so it’ll be good for him to switch off for a while. I was thinking of taking them to a photography exhibition in town.”

“Steve McCurry?” His eyes lit up exponentially at the name. “I’m dying to see that one. It’s a shame they don’t keep the studio open past nine now. That would’ve been ideal.” He scoffed and Sarah felt a sadness for him. Not so long ago, he’d had to leave his nephew’s school play halfway through and via a fire door when one of the parents insisted on joking with him loudly throughout the first fifteen minutes about whether he saw any acting talent on stage and then subsequently bugged him to play golf during an interval. It was hard for him to just go out and enjoy normal things such as exhibitions or theatre or, hell, even a casual walk through a park. They were beautiful at this time of year now that Summer was just around the corner and the weather was getting much warmer and brighter. For Chris, any simple trip now relied upon precision timing and stealth-like skills to avoid being seen and quite frankly, that must have sucked.

“Well, you’re welcome to come with. I’m sure we could sneak you in with a disguise somehow.” she winked and nudged him with her shoulder to break the silence, and there was a smile forming in the corner of his mouth. 

“Fuck it. You’re on!”

*

Next Chapter HERE

[asphalt-cocktail]

Inside Out

A/N: Well in honor of Tony Stark’s birthday being today I wanted to upload this fic I wrote for a request I had in my inbox for a Tony Stark X plus size!Reader. I honestly cant think of anything else to say my brain is pretty dead haha.

Warnings: Body image issues, fat shaming, angst, fluff, awkward first date, supportive Pepper, no spoilers 

Word count: 2200ish

Pairing: Tony Stark x Plus size!Reader 

Summary: Tony Stark’s assistant hasn’t had much luck with dates.

Request for @lilacprincessofrecovery

Masterlist

Submit a request or ask me a question or want to be tagged

Being Tony Stark’s assistant had some perks, like living arrangements and pay, but it also had some down falls like having to deal with the man child’s temperament and the fact that Tony watched damn near your every move. This included every time you got stood up which recently, seemed often. Once a week you would get all dressed up, hair done, full face painted, and go out to wait for your date at some nameless restaurant and wait… and wait… for hours for no one to show. Each night Tony would be waiting for you to come back and stay up making sure you were okay.

Today though, you insisted it was going to be different. Pepper sat with you while you blow dried your hair and filled in your eyebrows “So, tell me about this boy?” Pepper pressed, hoping for as much detail as possible out of you.

“Well his name is Jake and he is a CFO for some bank around here.” You answered, “We’ve been talking all week, I’m really excited, he doesn’t seem like the other guys.”

Pepper nodded her head, she hoped you were right. Seeing you heartbroken at least once a week was starting to chip away at her own heart.

“We are meeting at this Italian restaurant at 12 for lunch.” You said and puckered your lips, observing your lip line and making sure it was even and clean. You looked at your phone for the time, 11:30, time for you to leave. You quickly grabbed your jacket and purse “By Pepper! By Mr. Stark!” You called from the door and with that you were gone without another word.

At the restaurant you waited for 15 minutes before Jake met you at the table, so far it was going better than your last 5 dates. “Y/N?” He asked pulling the chair out.

You nodded your head “Yes! You must be Jake.” You said smiling sweetly. The two of you ordered a glass of wine and made pointless conversation. The same pointless conversation everyone makes on dates; where are you from, what are your hobbies, favorite movies, etc.

“So, where do you work?” Jake asked.

“I work for Stark Industries.” You were proud of where you worked, Mr. Stark had done so many amazing things within the last several years.

“Oh wow, that is such a great company to work for” He added enthusiastically, you knew but retorted a humble answer, “You know I think I am going to quick use the bathroom before the waiter comes back for our food.” He said, “I’ll be right back.”

You checked your phone, and aimlessly scrolled through your social media feed, waiting for your date to come back from his bathroom break. After about 15 minutes you looked around, and sighed, you had no idea what was taking him so long and texted him asking him if he was okay. Another 15 minutes passed and there was still no response and no sign of him. You packed up your things and threw a fist full of money on the table to cover the glasses of wine you sucked down at an ungodly rate while waiting and left. Your drive back home was spent with you blasting music and trying to hold back your tears after yet another failed date.

You were greeted with Tony’s smiling face “How did it-” he started but was cut off by you pushing past him and throwing your jacket and purse on the floor and storming off into your room.

You unknowingly shut the door in Tony’s face and sat on your bed, wondering what was wrong with you. A ping on your phone knocked you out of your thoughts, it was Jake. You didn’t know why you opened it, you should have just ignored his message, but for some reason you opened it curious as to why he just up and left.

Maybe he had an emergency?

You should really post full body pictures on your dating profile.

Was all the message said.

You felt you stomach drop as your face scrunched in pain and you threw your phone to the side. You knew this was why he stood you up, your body, you had always been a bigger girl, ample hips, plush thighs that touched, a stomach, this was why you couldn’t get a boyfriend.

You hadn’t even noticed the knocking at the door until you could hear Tony asking to be let in. You got up and shuffled to the door, Tony sighed seeing your disheveled state, lipstick half gone, mascara running down your face, nose red, and pulled you into a hug. You backed up and shut the door before you accepted his hug and leaned into his shoulder crying and leaving tear stains on his tee shirt.

“What happened?” He asked sitting down at the edge of your bed.

“He showed up this time, but he left before we even could order food.” You answered hiccupping and rubbing your eyes. “Then he sent me a message a few minutes ago saying I should post full body pictures on my profile.”

Tony looked at you in disbelief “All right. I want you cleaned and ready to go in the next hour. Wear that dress you wear to galas.” He said standing up. You looked at him, confused at what he was telling you, “Well come on, hurry up.” He said and leaving you standing there in disbelief.

Within the hour you had fixed your hair and makeup as best you could and waited for your boss down in the foyer wearing your best dress. Soon Tony wandered downstairs clad in a grey suit and sunglasses and walked out to where his car was waiting. He sped up to walk ahead of you and opened the door “Come on,” He said and ushered you into the seat. You looked around still confused at what was happening.

“Where are we going?” You asked once he was in the car and already on the road.

“A date.” His tone was very matter of fact.

You looked at him shocked “A date?” You asked, “You are taking me on a date?” You let out a somewhat bitter laugh.

Tony glanced at you with a puzzled expression, “I’m serious.” He said, “It seems like these guys don’t know how much of catch you are.”

Your face flushed, and you looked down at your feet “I don’t know about that. Maybe they’re right maybe I’m too fa-”

“I don’t want to hear you finish that sentence.” He said putting a hand up “You really have no idea how beautiful you really are, you’re just too much for these guys to handle, they don’t know what to do with all this woman.” You smiled but kept our eyes averted.

You kept a watch out your window and gasped when a five-star restaurant pulled into view. You knew Tony didn’t have reservations, but that didn’t matter when you were Tony Stark. No wonder he had asked you to dress up so nicely. Once again, he walked around and opened the door for you and allowed you to hold the crook of his elbow as he tossed his keys to the valet driver and within minutes the two of you were seated at a table with an amazing view of the city. You looked at the menu and frowned, everything on here was so expensive, way more than you could afford “Don’t worry about the cost I’m buying.” He said, “It’s a date remember?”

You nodded your head, almost forgetting how these things worked after dealing with so many shitty dates. You didn’t know what to say “So, I scheduled the appointments for next week,” Naturally business was the first thing to leave your mouth.

Tony shook his head “This isn’t a lunch meeting, Y/N, I’m taking you on date.” He added putting his menu down and looking at you “What are your hobbies, where are you from? I want to know about you, you’ve worked with me for 5 years now and I don’t really know anything about you.”

You nodded your head, he was right, you knew almost everything about Tony down to what his favorite shampoo brand was “Well, I grew up just outside the city with my parents, I went to college for PR and I enjoy painting.” You continued, on and on, describing your family and college along with anything else that came to mind. The entire time he seemed genuinely interested, which was not something you were used to.

Tony nodded his head taking in all the information you told him and burying it in his vast mental bank “You like art?” He asked, “Have you ever been to the Metropolitan museum of Art?”

You sighed, out of all of your years living in New York, you had never once been to the Met “No… I haven’t.” You said sounding disappointed.

“Well then, we have our next date picked out then.” He said smiling.

You looked at him shocked “Our next date?” You asked, “I thought this was like a one-time thing…” you forced yourself to think of it as a one-time thing, a pity date for all the times you’ve been stood up, you didn’t want the disappointment of getting your hopes up for a second date.

Tony furrowed his brows “Y/n” He said, his gaze was intense “I am taking you on a date because I like you.” It was very much Tony’s style to bypass most formalities and get straight to the point “I see you come home ever week, one guy after another, breaking your heart and I can’t stand seeing it anymore.”

You sighed in relief as the waiter conveniently came to take your order before you could manage an answer, you looked at your menu and quickly scanned it as Tony made small talk with the young man taking your order. A grandiose picture of a steak with mashed potatoes and gravy, all the fixings caught your eyes, and you looked down at yourself and at Tony, back at the picture, then back at yourself and felt a surge of guilt push through you. Guilt for wanting to eat this glorious spread of food, you’ve eaten enough food today, you thought to yourself as you turned the page back to the salads and appetizers. You let out a puff of air “I’ll take a cobb salad.” You said smiling softly.

Tony arched his brow “What are you a rabbit?” He asked in a joking manor.

You shrugged your shoulders “I don’t know, I mean I had a big lunch…” you said trailing off

Tony handed back his menu to the waiter “Go on sweetheart, treat yourself today.” He said smiling slyly.

Your face flushed “Well…” You thought for a minute, thinking about what you had for lunch, oh right it was a nice big helping of tears and wine because you got stood up. “The steak dinner, rare?” You asked the waiter, he smiled and wrote down your order and refilled the two glasses of wine and went off.

The remainder of your dinner with Tony went very well, you two made small talk and were both surprised how little you knew about each other. Upon your arrival back to the compound Tony walked you back to his room, he sauntered by your side with his hands in his pockets, trying to act coy “When are you free next?” He asked.

You laughed “Well, I’m your assistant so I guess I should be asking you that…” You trailed off leaning against your door.

“Right…” Tony said trailing off “How about next weekend?” He asked “After the meeting with the marketing department?”

“So, Saturday at 11?” You asked, your mind was racing, you hadn’t been on a proper date in so long, how was he going to say good bye? Was he going to kiss you? Was he going to hug you? Give you a firm handshake?

“Yes, 11. Wear your walking shoes, we’re going to go to the Met.” He said and smiled, unsure on how to end things with you, he was never good at saying goodbye to people. So, he turned your head to the side and placed a lingering kiss on your cheek, it was sweet and simple and made your face flush. “Y/N,” Tony started, “As long as we are together, I don’t want you to ever feel less than, you are beautiful.”

You held his gaze, no man had ever complemented you so much in one night, let alone treated you this well, you didn’t know how to handle it “Thank you.” You said “I’m sorry, I don’t know how to handle complements.” You said looking down and playing with the ends of your hair.

A grin spread across Tony’s face as he looked at you, he loved the way your cheeks flushed and your eyes darted around nervously whenever he complemented you, it would take a while but Tony would make sure you would feel as beautiful on the inside as you did on the outside

[f4liveblogarchives]

Fantastic Four Vol 1 #187, #188, & #189

Thur Aug 22 2019 [02:04 PM] Bocaj: 187 issues later, still fantastic but not necessarily still four [02:05 PM] Wack'd: Eh, they're still pretty Fourish [02:05 PM] Wack'd: Unless you count Franklin I guess [02:05 PM] Wack'd: Sure, Thundra, Greer, and Impy have been around a lot lately, but Greer insists she's not part of the team and Thundra and Impy don't really play well with others [02:06 PM] maxwellelvis: Also, Impossible Man's been KO'd by an unseen assailant. [02:06 PM] Wack'd: Also true [02:07 PM] Wack'd: Anyway, on the plane ride back from New Salem, the team recaps a little [02:07 PM] Wack'd: Agatha left that place in the hopes that others have her kind would be encouraged to join her, and she blames herself for raising Nicholas badly [02:07 PM] Wack'd: These are, again, the kind of details it might've been nice to have during the actual story so we could wring something out of them [02:08 PM] Bocaj: "Thundra and Impy don't really play well with others" I posit that Johnny and Ben historically haven't always played well with others [02:09 PM] Bocaj: Sometimes a family is that cat woman stray you adopted, the woman from an alternate universe where men are considered the weaker gender until you slammed her universe into another, and that annoying alien [02:09 PM] Bocaj: We'll call him the 'urkel' type [02:09 PM] Wack'd: Let me rephrase that to "are openly contemptuous of others and seem hesitant to do even the bare minimum to lend aid" [02:09 PM] maxwellelvis: Yeah, but in a different way from Impossible Man, who literally nobody except other Popuppians can stand to be around. [02:09 PM] Bocaj: Ok well thats different [02:10 PM] Wack'd: The Four discover Impy, knocked out but apparently unharmed. Sue worries that whoever did this might still be in the Baxter [02:11 PM] Wack'd: We can also add to George Pérez to the long list of comics artists who are bad at drawing children but very good at drawing tiny adults

[02:12 PM] Bocaj: George Pérez can draw a lot of things, in terms of range and also in terms of numerical things on a page but children are black magic that eludes him [02:13 PM] Aleph Null: i relate because children are also black magic that eludes me [02:13 PM] Wack'd: So Johnny flies outside to look in all the windows while Ben decides to go floor by floor. Reed is out out because they made a plan without him and Sue has to heal his fragile ego [02:13 PM] Wack'd: “Without my stretching powers, I'm not really good enough to be anything more than a nursemaid!” [02:13 PM] Bocaj: fuck off reed [02:14 PM] Aleph Null: can we retitle the blog to “fuck off reed” [02:14 PM] Wack'd: This is a nice moment

[02:15 PM] Wack'd: Honestly I like how forgiving everyone is being of Agatha. Not that anyone on this team has room to throw stones [02:16 PM] Wack'd: Oh my god Johnny is also like "man, running off on my own like I always do probably hurt Reed's feelings" [02:16 PM] Wack'd: Anyway Ben runs into KLAW! [02:17 PM] Bocaj: Ulysses Klaue Klaw? [02:17 PM] Wack'd: Whose shtick at this point is still being made of sound and also being able to fire sound monsters at people [02:17 PM] Wack'd: And not, you know, having a claw [02:17 PM] maxwellelvis: His artificial hand is his claw. [02:19 PM] Wack'd: Oh hey it's this guy

[02:19 PM] Bocaj: oh thats a bad look [02:20 PM] maxwellelvis: Actually that's not that guy. That's a different guy. [02:20 PM] Wack'd: Back in #20 he got the ability to alter non-organic matter because he was exposed to an atomic incident [02:20 PM] Wack'd: Since then he's had a couple of appearances in the 70s, one in Two in One and one in Iron Man [02:20 PM] Bocaj: The guy I knew as Molecule Man is a multiversal bomb [02:21 PM] maxwellelvis: Wait, I saw that guy shrivel up and disintegrate when separated from his wand for too long. [02:22 PM] Wack'd: Yes [02:22 PM] Wack'd: This got undone in the Iron Man appearance I mentioned [02:22 PM] maxwellelvis: oh [02:22 PM] Wack'd: Where he also gained the ability to possess people [02:23 PM] Bocaj: There was a shitty Avengers Assemble episode about Son of Molecule Man [02:23 PM] Bocaj: It had a stylistic flashback to EMH [02:23 PM] Wack'd: Given how fucking often these books are like "oh, they killed him, he's gone for real" and then in a completely different book he comes back to life and then he returns to his original book with a long winded explanation... [02:23 PM] Wack'd: I'm not sure why you would've assumed that he was actually dead [02:24 PM] maxwellelvis: Because this time he left behind a body. [02:24 PM] Wack'd: That doesn't mean anything! [02:24 PM] maxwellelvis: Well, a pile of dust in a ragged old Molecule Man costume. [02:24 PM] Wack'd: At the end of his first appearance the Watcher aged him into oblivion [02:26 PM] Wack'd: Agatha filling the role of "lady who tells Reed to suck it the fuck up" now that Medusa's gone

[02:28 PM] Wack'd: Anyway Ben gets turned into glass, Johnny is drowned in midair, Sue is...uh...

[02:28 PM] Wack'd: Sure, that's how that works [02:29 PM] Wack'd: And Reed tries to fire on the two but his gun is turned to helium and he's knocked out [02:30 PM] Wack'd: Okay so uh [02:31 PM] Wack'd: In the aftermath of that Iron Man I mentioned, Klaw found Owen's wand, with Owen's mind trapped inside, and gave it to a guy he met on the street so Owen would possess that guy [02:31 PM] Wack'd: The narrative notes that the guy was a boxer so I should probably also note that the guy was a boxer in case it becomes relevant [02:33 PM] Wack'd: So! The Four are incapacitated! Who cam save them now! [02:33 PM] Wack'd: Why, Impossible Man, of course. Not because he cares about the team, but because he's angry that someone defeated him in combat [02:34 PM] Wack'd: Impy can shapeshift so Molecule Man can't really do much to him [02:34 PM] Wack'd: And Impy removes his ears and makes himself into a non-sound-conductive material so he's immune to Klaw [02:34 PM] Wack'd: And then he kicks their asses [02:35 PM] Wack'd: Owen had been planning on using Reed's psi-amplifier (from that time Ben and Hulk switched brains) to make it so he could keep his ass in this body forever [02:35 PM] Wack'd: But Reed manages to cut the cord mid-process, sapping Owen back into his wand [02:36 PM] Wack'd: And undoing all the damage he caused [02:36 PM] Wack'd: AND THEN REED PICKS UP THE WAND WITH HIS BARE HANDS, LIKE AN IDIOT [02:37 PM] Wack'd: W E L P

[02:38 PM] Bocaj: Basically Lunella becoming Smartest was long overdue because Reed is dumb [02:38 PM] Bocaj: Someone needed to explicitly be smarter than him or else it would be very sad [02:39 PM] Wack'd: Don't think it's escaped my attention that this is our second evil Reed storyline in which Reed isn't actually evil [02:39 PM] Bocaj: Hm [02:40 PM] Bocaj: At least it’s not an evil Sue storyline [02:40 PM] Bocaj: Those are bad in many many ways [02:40 PM] Wack'd: If Gerry Conway's read on the Reed/Sue divorce arc was "if they're going to split up it should be because Reed does something truly ghastly", it seems like Wein's was "people seem to really want to make Reed a jerk, so how do I do that without altering the fact that he's genuinely a nice person" [02:42 PM] Wack'd: I loathed Conway's take, but Wein's is even worse because it denies the idea that Reed has anything to be culpable for. It seems like people have been shilling him constantly recently--Sue noticing Counter-Reed is unaffectionate to spot the ruse, Ben assuming Counter-Reed is obsessively watching the Negative Zone because he wants to save his counterpart, Counter-Reed immediately becoming a selfless paragon when his headache wears off [02:43 PM] Wack'd: And this issue, too, with everyone but Agatha assuming Reed is entitled to authority and feeling bad for hurting his feelings by doing their own things [02:44 PM] Wack'd: Maybe I'm being uncharitable because he's the cripple-the-b**** guy, but it does really seem like he sees nothing wrong with Reed's normal pattern of behavior and is mildly baffled anyone would. Which would fit well with his aesthetic of overwhelming nostalgia [02:45 PM] Wack'd: Anyway

Thur Aug 22 2019 [02:46 PM] Wack'd: So Reed's brain is trapped in Owen's wand now [02:47 PM] Wack'd: Ben destroys the Psi-Amplifier so Owen can't take over Reed's body permanently [02:47 PM] Wack'd: Owen, in retaliation, traps Sue, Johnny, Ben and Impy in an adimantium cube [02:48 PM] Wack'd: While he goes to blow off some adimantium rage [02:48 PM] maxwellelvis: Spider-Man and Venom ~ Maximum Carnage (Genesis) - Main Theme [02:49 PM] Wack'd: Johnny uses his heat to expand the air in the box, forcing it open, but it takes basically everything he's got [02:49 PM] Wack'd: You would think everybody in that box would die a million times of heat stroke but I guess not [02:50 PM] maxwellelvis: I was about to question the presence of Adamantium in an FF story, then I remembered that A. it's past 1975 now so Wolverine is a thing, and B. Len Wein is one of Wolverine's co-creators. [02:50 PM] maxwellelvis: And I think he first coined "Adamantium" to describe what his claws are made of. [02:51 PM] Wack'd: Watcher has gone from a white Grey to a fat bald guy to a Tor Johnson character

[02:53 PM] Wack'd: Watcher is still not talking, which Ben takes as a sign of apathy [02:53 PM] Wack'd: "Why don't you go to sell tickets to a funeral," he asks [02:54 PM] Wack'd: Ah yes, my favorite Tom Hanks movie

[02:55 PM] maxwellelvis: "You should make'em bugs!" [02:58 PM] Wack'd: Credit where it's due, I think this is genuinely the coolest monster design we've had in a while! You can see some remnants of the Kirby aping that still, in 1977, has not worn off, but it feels novel applied to brick and mortar, and I love the arrangements of the windows and the way the structures on the roof jut out of it's shoulders

[02:59 PM] Wack'd: Reed agrees to stop resisting, and the building returns to normal [02:59 PM] Wack'd: And then his friends show up and Reed starts resisting again [03:00 PM] Wack'd: Thanks to that resistance, Owen can't do anything to our heroes directly, and has to settle for transforming their surroundings [03:00 PM] Wack'd: This would be a lot simpler if they just kept the "no organic matter" limit from his first appearance [03:01 PM] maxwellelvis: Blame Steve Gerber, I guess. [03:01 PM] Wack'd: Impy tries to hit Owen with a giant mallet but Sue stops him because she doesn't want to hurt Reed [03:02 PM] Wack'd: Impy takes it well

[03:05 PM] Wack'd: Unfortunately, Reed's body gets knocked out anyway [03:06 PM] Wack'd: But while this renders the Reed inside of Owen's wand unconscious, it sends Owen into spasms of pain [03:06 PM] Wack'd: Causing him to release his grip on the wand, dropping it into a nearby factory furnace [03:07 PM] Wack'd: And so normalcy is restored--OR IS IT?! [03:07 PM] Wack'd: Reed's decided to resign from the Four [03:07 PM] Wack'd: And Sue's going to join him because "I already deserted my husband once, I'm not going to do it again" [03:07 PM] Wack'd: *sigh* [03:08 PM] Bocaj: 😐

Thur Aug 22 2019 [03:10 PM] Wack'd: FANTASTIC FOUR VOL 1 #189 [03:10 PM] Wack'd: Is a reprint of Annual ’66 [03:10 PM] Wack'd: Moving on [03:10 PM] Wack'd: As if there weren't enough reasons to hate Wein, it certainly seems like a lot of issues get delayed while he's around [03:11 PM] Wack'd: This is the second in less than ten issues [03:11 PM] maxwellelvis: That might explain why Chris Claremont took over Uncanny X-Men almost immediately after Wein revived it