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#'death is absolutely safe'
noxtivagus · 1 year
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i love the architects sm. their music is so good
#🌙.rambles#ty ffxiv for introducing me to them#I LOVE SAM CARTER'S VOICE SM ILL CRY#from the screams n oh my god he sings metal rlly well#but then h. his voice is like. an angel too#like. particularly rn one song in my head w that soft voice i love so much is#'death is absolutely safe'#listening to 'death is not defeat' for the first time rn. oh my god. his voice#THE LYRICS R SO GOOD I'LL CRY HAHA#n the msuic too. the isntruments the strings there n the metal.. eprfection#peffection#PERFECTION 🥹🫶🏼#raghh i love the architects sm#from memento mori n learn to live. n like. dead butterflies / animals / black lungs / meteor#flight without feathers / death is absolutely safe / doomsday / a match made in heaven / the distant blue#mortality.. is probably smth i think abt on a daily basis#like even when i was younger. idk maybe it's bcs of the stories i read#gosh one of my fav books ever is still the giver. that influenced me so much#i love music sm#existence / heaven help us specifically have smth w rhe composition that melts me heart sm#hfkshfksjfs music.. these songs r so good i love them so very much#OH YEAH THE ARCHITECTS BTW THEY THEY ADVOCATE FOR STUFF TOO. I LOVE THEM SO VERY MUCH#i'm very passionate abt climate change n yk sam carter the frontman n singer of the architects#dogs !!!! animals !!!!! c:#the rest of the members like. ah.. yeah the twins. sorry wait i'll get emotional if i think of them but#their lyrics rlly r so meaningful. n i love the mixture of compassion n viscousness they have in a way#it's just. heavy. whether it's about mortality of people or of the earth. n sam's voice delivers it so well. n the band's jsut rlly so good#n the.. twins.. w the lyrics? iirc sob n then just. thre rest of the band. music's so good. n then. sam speaks out on stuff too iirc#I JUST. REALLY APPRECIATE THEM SO MUCH. ONE OF MY FAV BANDS FR.#random thought i will read more edgar allan poe. i always rmb that wnvr i listen to animals bcs dream within a dream 🥹🫶🏼
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wiisagi-maiingan · 2 months
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I love tornado survival guides. "Shelter in a basement or interior room without any windows. But if you're in a mobile home, just fucking die I guess lol"
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fritzmonorail · 21 days
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I love Jamie. He’s down for anything as long as it’s with The Doctor. It was not that long ago that he was getting sick just sitting in a normal air plane, and here he is just like
“rocket? Sure, not only do I understand what that is but I’m totally willing to strap myself in one immediately” This man is from the 18th century. I’m from 2024 and the very idea of doing this would scare the fuck out of me. He didn’t even know how to read when he started and now look at him. I’m so proud and also a little worried. He’s so brave and loyal.
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scootersscooter · 10 months
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Something about Lex being so certain she was going to die in Toy Zone and her dying wish being that her sister never needed her the way that she had needed her, that Hannah would be strong enough to escape the mall and still make it out of Hatchetfield to California even if she had no one by her side when she got there
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thesummerstorms · 2 months
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The other thing that I think I would want in an Annabeth Wayne AU that I don't think I've seen so far is Bruce being absolutely pissed at Athena.
It was bad enough with Talia and Damian, but Athena is a literal god of wisdom who should know better AND he doesn't even have the "culpability" of having slept with her.
She one hundred percent saw Batman, tactician of the Justice League, was drawn in by her aspect of the Goddess of Strategy, and proceeded to create a child without his consent, a daughter who she didn't even raise before the child became a weapon.
And like whatever else, however fucked up Damian was by his own training to become a child-weapon, at least Talia loved Damian.
Whereas Athena loves Annabeth in the way a Goddess loves, not the way a Person loves, and I don't think Bruce, whose entire identity is so fixated on his relationship with his own parents, would recognize that as love at all.
And, like, Talia put Damian through a lot of shit. I think Bruce would be angry there too. But when push came to shove, she at least at some point brought him to Bruce because she thought it was in her son's best interests.
Athena actively lead Annabeth away from Bruce and into the streets at the age of seven, which Bruce would never see as in her best interest, whatever Athena's godly perspective is, however badly he reacted after Jason's death, even though he couldn't see (and dismissed the idea of) the spiders and the monsters. She was seven. In the streets of Gotham.
Athena let Annabeth fight a major role in two wars back to back without being there to train her or protect her or love her or even advise her. Athena advocated for the cold blooded murder of the other children who had actually tried to keep his daughter safe. Athena sent Annabeth against Arachne when Athena's children have universally died on that quest for a thousand years.
Athena let Bruce think he had gotten Annabeth killed because of his own inability to handle his grief. Let him think his daughter was dead or worse for years. Would have let him keep thinking that if the Fates didn't have other plans.
And just, in true fashion for all of my ideas on a PJO x DC crossover, everyone really comes out more traumatized than before. This includes Bruce.
Because now he wasn't just used unknowingly for a child just once, but twice. And in both cases he's going to have to live forever with the guilt of not having been able to protect his kids from what their other parent wanted to make of them
(On top of all the ways he has directly failed them and made any complexes worse, of course )
#bruce wayne#annabeth chase#annabeth wayne#athena#pjo x dcu#dcu x pjo#again I have to reiterate that I actually do think Athena loves her daughter#I just think that to a human a god's love is inevitably going to look cruel#because they don't and can't love in the same way#giving your child opportunity for Kleos and sending them to a teacher is a love to a goddess#whereas a human parent might never want their child to fight or suffer at all#and even with Bruce's whole Batman and Robin situation#he a) still felt guilt and went back and forth over it multiple times#and b) he was at least trying to guide them and accompanied them into the field and deliberately tried to give them whatever tools they#needed to be both moral and safe#Athena doesn't see a difference between what she did and Bruce's crusade but he absolutely doe#this post is obviously very much more Bruce's POV of course#Athena would have her own but I am biased#'love the way a goddess loves not the way a person loves' - but Rev aren't the gods people#Not fully#I don't think they can be; they're too vast#Behind their personalities they're all personification#so yes and no but not enough#as for bruce reacting badly after Jason's death#I generally don't think he *hurt* her which I've seen some choose to write based on him hitting Dick#but someone in fic wrote a HC that he blamed her at first bc she knew Jason was sneaking out and didn't say and I took that and ran with it#& after his initial outburst he freezes her out bc his anger scares him & he thinks keeping her at a distance will protect her from that#not knowing that she's already internalized that guilt AND already felt prior to this that Bruce was abandoning her in favor of being Batma
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dallonismysavior · 4 months
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come back to me!
(x)
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Not to keep beating dead horses like I so much love to do but I am still completely Flabbergasted and Astonished at how you (Merle Ambrose) could discover the most terrifying fact that a child that is essentially under your care has been indoctrinated into a cult (which, by the way, a process that has taken over the course of years) ((by an agent that has been stationed in a direct position to make it easier to access and manipulate children, that has easily escaped your notice for such a long time)) that worships a nihilistic entity whose ultimate goal is the absolute and total destruction of Everything and Everyone around you, and your one, single, simple-sentenced response to that is to say "Oh, that's a shame. He (Duncan) always was pretty terrible. Hope he gets better someday." And then to move on from those extremely worrying and dangerous bundle of issues permanently without taking any sort of action to protect the vulnerable and make sure nothing like this ever happens again
#i love ambrose as a character but the things he does makes me clench my fists so hard blood circulation gets cut off#the absolute.... lack of care ambrose has for certain things literally render me speechless#and like okay in his uh. in his uh “defense”. there was like. other stuff going on at the time. i get that#like the end of the world for the 7th time yeah there were other things on ambrose's plate#but i dont know how many different ways to put “your children are being manipulated and kidnapped into a cult that means them harm under-#-your nose and it can absolutely happen again“ and make that stick#you... i#that is a horrifying fact to learn and the response is dismissive at BEST#like im not saying ambrose should adopt all 800 children that go to his school or whatever#but like... DO SOMETHING#you have COMPLETE AND UTTER INFLUENCE OVER THE NATIONAL GUARD. DO YOU REMEMBER THAT? USE THAT#send out watch parties! hold stranger danger assemblies! have adults regularly check in with kids! install a curfew! ANY OF THOSE THINGS?#like even if ambrose couldnt single-handedly stop a powerful cult he could at least make an effort.... AN EFFORT#ONE ATTEMPT. TO MAKE SURE ****HIS**** SCHOOL AND STUDENTS ARE SAFE........#and the fact that he says something along the lines of “well duncan was always fucked up” ☹️☹️☹️☹️#this shouldt surprise me fir the man who for 1. some reason refuses to fix the death school#2. does not care about dworgyn or mortis in the least#3. keeps trying to pressure necromancers to change schools#4. kidnapped US from earth and used us.#it really shouldnt but........ but#im gonna say it and idc (/lh) if its unpopular. ambrose should not be in power#he is incompetent at best. he is harmful at worst.#he does NOTHING 99.9% of the time and the one Tuesday where he takes action it makes something worse. he should not be in power#this post is /lh but idk. im a little angry#NOT SERIOUSLY ANGRY BUT CMON MAN. CMON BRO#if the game utilized ambrose's potential more and pointed out how useless/paranoid/rash he can be i would ascend to heaven#i would like literally one person (who isnt a villain) in the game to look at ambrose and say “wow hes kinda fucked up”#THATS THE BARE MINIMUM BUT I WILL ACCEPT THAT I WILL.#kind of unrelated but im kinda mad that the only person to correctly point out how weird ambrose is is morganthe#the murderous tyrant. the person we're not supposed to listen to. because she's evil. she couldnt POSSIBLY be right about Good Guy Ambrose!
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unknownarmageddon · 3 months
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Hunger games simulator but it's just Kross aus
OH MY GOD you’re so right. hang on
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#i ran out of aus and had to get kind of obscure so death’s doorstep and sondertale and like. dogfight and doomsday are there#also this got me thinking about like. legitimate hunger games with the kross aus so i’m gonna talk about that for a bit#excluding forces of nature and fear the forest i think the guys that have the best chance of winning are#the proximity guys. both of them#chains and rings#and *maybe* rental suits killer. both of them and their chances would be heightened if they worked together#my reasoning for proximity is just. think about it#they’ve basically been living the hunger games the whole time#they absolutely have the survival skills. and they’re bonded like shelter dogs so they’d definitely end up working together#chains and rings would be good at fighting i think. so at the start they’d just go ham and wreck people’s shit#but i doubt they’d have the survival skills for it#they fight in a controlled area and they’ve never needed to scavenge for resources like the aka guys have#so they could get places in terms of conflict but i doubt they’d be able to sustain themselves super long#but i dunno they still have a chance#and for rental suits i definitely think killer could go places#like. he already kinda scavenges for stuff. he’s had to fend for himself for the most part. he knows to get stuff. y’know what i mean#i’m doing a trash job of explaining it but like. you know#and if he and cross decided to like actually commit and work together they’d have more of a chance#cause cross is better with like. strategy and like. medical attention#so if killer did the fighting and cross was methodical about stuff like what could be safe to eat and first aid#they might kinda have a chance#i don’t think they have like. the strong relationship aka kross would have and they’re probably not that physically strong#cause they live generally normal modern lives#so i don’t think they’d win. but they could get somewhere#ANYWAY final thoughts i think aka cross and killer might win in those circumstances. out of the main aus anyway#answering asks#denieatsart asks#deni!!
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I strongly agree that there are world events that deserve much more news coverage and resources than the Titan because frankly it should’ve been immediately assumed they were dead when sonar couldn’t find them and communication was lost.
However, I don’t necessarily think it’s fair to compare the EU coast guard and the US and Canada's various first response teams that responded to the Titan. Because they’re separate entities.
Do I think people should care more about the refugee ship that capsized due to alleged incompetence of the coast guard? Yes. I do. And I hope more survivors can be found because that was a genuine tragedy.
Do I think that it should be getting the same kind of attention as the Titan? Not really. Because people are just memeing on the Titan, and the average tumblr user has around $0.20 to their name and maybe 400 followers so this isn’t a very good platform for getting meaningful help for those affected by that situation.
This isn’t even a “you can care about two things at once” situation, because again with the Titan you should be very amused by 4/5 of those deaths whereas there’s nothing funny about what happened to that fishing ship. These are very different niches in cultural awareness and your ire should be towards media companies over random people on social media.
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"yes im so fine"
*researches whether i can get my hands on ipecac*
#tw ed#obligatory MASSIVE do not do this#straight up poison that can kill you from one (1) time#used to be used to induce vomiting#directly the cause of death of karen carpenter and countless others#i wont i swear i wont#but i still researched it bc i was curious#tbh there are easier ways of poisoing oneself than semi illegal drugs#also if yall remember the post about a poison i own: i did more reseach and while that amount would probably kill me w no medical#intervention; it would take just under three times as much to be absolutely certain of hitting the toxic dose (calculated quantity per kg#of the top end of a given range. so it could kill me but if i was gonna go out that way id want about three times as much to be sure.)#honestly surprised ive never heard of any deaths from it. the most likely way to survive would be to throw it up i think#(or present to hospital and take charcoal or smth)#honestly though. my research says loss of consciousness and required intubation within half an hour in case studies#hence if you werent in reach of medical attention youd probably collapse an die#and i am very deliberately NOT mentioning what it is bc of how toxic it is#ive thought of combining it and another method to be absolutely sure but eh#honestly if it DIDNT work it sounds straight up embarrassing to admit to people tho thats one of the things stopping me#but literally a dose in a child requiring intubation and kid ended up in a coma recovered w no ill effects.#thats the dream yk. try and succeed and youre free; try and fail and you see no ill effects.#but yeah i wouldnt try w only the amount i have.#so im safe#....rereading the above. okay i might be a little mentally ill lol#but i am safe and absolutely nobody call the cops on me.#im fine.#tw suicide#puddleglum hours#nobody worry abt me ok. im fine.#just thinking silly lil thoughts like usual :)#EDIT: just occurred to me that using this poison could make it not look like a suicide
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sirenium · 4 months
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I try my damn near hardest to avoid shipcourse on this blog. However, I have so many qualms with the anti side of things that I need to say something.
If your first inclination after seeing someone explore fiction is to call them a pedophile (as an insult, no less!), abuse enabler, and/or urge your followers to mass report them, you are a problem. Maybe it's because I grew up during the golden days of fandoms, where ship and let ship was the norm and not whatever this shit is, but it's bizarre to see people get cancelled for being a proshipper. I just don't have it in me to care about what people do to that fictional child. It's none of my business.
I've noticed a trend from antis of anything: anti radqueers, antishippers, anti hazbin/helluva etc, and it is that their arguments are extremely self centered. 'It's romanticizing MY abuse/trauma/condition!' as if that stranger on the other side of the screen couldn't possibly have similar trauma etc and copes with it differently. "It triggers ME!" then don't actively seek out that material and get mad at the creator. It's a 'me! me! me!' mindset.
See, me personally? I don't care if someone makes and romanticizes a fic that capitalizes on my trauma. I don't care what reason they have, either; whether it's to cope with their own trauma or to simply have fun, I do not care. No amount of harassment from a bunch of teenagers can change the fact that I don't care, and the fact that there are others OLDER THAN ME, someone who will be 19 in July, who condone and enforce anti views is terrible.
Creative freedom shouldn't even be a debate or discourse situation. People need to grow the hell up and get over themselves.
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fizzyghosts · 1 month
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Hywel is inspired by a mix of my issues with stories with nonhuman protagonist/about nonhumans becoming human AND vet posts ive seen warning people about the dangers of anthropomorphisizing animals. Its fine to joke about your pets doing things out of spite or other human emotions, it does put you at risk of not being able to read their body language correctly. Cats dont cry out of sadness, a cat crying, with actual tears streaming down its face, is a sign of a medical issue. A dog smiling isn't doing it bc its happy, it means its nervous. Not being able to spot these is bad, and sometimes even dangerous, for you and the animal.
If you never get past Hywel's human appearance and treat him like one its like getting a reactive dog, doing zero research or training, and then taking it to a dog park. If Hywel mauls someone in town then its on you.
#hywel struggles a lot with good vs bad things specifically#he makes decisions based on what makes him feel good or bad (like most people) but#if you explain something being bad to him using emotional reasons (it makes you a bad person‚ its an awful thing to do‚ its gross)#he genuinely will not get it#he'll try to stop! just bc he was told to stop! but he doesn't know how to apply it to other situations#murder for example#he's immortal death doesnt have the same meaning to him#and he doesn't particularly care about people outside of arisen#they're entertaining he finds them fun. they're critters to him#but he's not bothered by them dying#arisen dying is bad bc it means he failed his charge. he cant die. regular people dying? eh whatever#so he doesn't really get why murder is bad#if ur in vernsworth and tell him no then he'll be like i dont understand but ok!!#its only bad in vernsworth bc thats where you said no at!! everywhere else is fine !#he's not trying to find loopholes!!! he genuinely doesn't get it and is doing his best to work with what he's given!!!#his way of thinking is p straightforward and logical though#so you have to explain stuff by how it effects him and how the cons of doing it outweigh the benefits#hywel u cant murder people you dont like bc if we allowed that people would kill merchants and then you couldn't buy stuff#anyway bonus scifi au stuff while im here#hywel would remember the time loops and would do whatever it takes to keep the crew safe#but the thing is. cosmic horror hywel doesn't really understand time or how the loops are fucking people up#he knows the false dawn losing its crew was bad. he doesn't understand WHY its bad‚ but he knows it is#and he loves this crew! theyre funny and some of them are fun to chew on. enrichment.#he's gonna do whateve it takes to keep this crew safe and together. on the ship. y'know‚‚‚ bc the other ship losing its crew was bad#restarting a loop means nothing to him. yeah he's gotta start over with his friendships but thats fun! enrichment!#hes a creature time means nothing to him#beginning of the loop all his friends are here :^) he's completely unaware of how its negatively effecting people#anyway i cannot stress enough he isn't doing this to be malicious he's just doing his best#someone would absolutely realize he was doing this early on and if you tell him to stop he will#but yeah better hope you can explain why he cant do that well enough or hywels gonna unintentionally find every loophole
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latrodectal · 4 months
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i’m calling this for the next acotar book now, posting it for posterity.
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wonder-worker · 4 months
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"...Walsingham, the monastic author of the St. Albans Chronicle, was by far [Alice Perrers'] harshest contemporary critic, who in his venom has (somewhat ironically) left us with the longest and most detailed account of her background and personality, her influence as Edward’s mistress, and her subsequent trial. He describes Alice as a shameless lowborn meretrix (a word variously translated as mistress, whore, or harlot), who “brought almost universal dishonour upon the king’s reputation […] and defiled virtually the whole kingdom of England with her disgraceful insolence.” Although Walsingham was not always accurate and, specifically in this case, clearly heavily biased against Alice, he nevertheless provides a truly contemporary account, and his importance as a source should not be underestimated. Likewise, the anonymous monk of St. Mary’s York recorded that in the Good Parliament the Commons (represented by their speaker, Sir Peter de la Mare) stated that it “would be of great gain to the kingdom to remove the said dame [Alice] from the presence of the king both as a matter of conscious and of the ill prosecution of the war.” During the same assembly, the bishop of Rochester, Thomas Brinton, preached from St. Paul’s Cross that “it is not fitting nor safe for all the keys of the kingdom to hang from the belt of one wife.” Although the word wife (uxoris) is used, it is widely accepted that this is a reference to Alice.”
-Laura Tompkins, '"Edward III's Gold-Digging Mistress": Alice Perrers, Gender, and Financial Power at the English Royal Court, 1360-1377", "Women and Economic Power in Premodern Courts" (edited by Cathleen Sarti). Italics by me.
#alice perrers#historicwomendaily#my post#edward iii#@ anon who asked me how much faith should we put in Walsingham's account of Alice#Walsingham is undoubtedly vicious and prejudiced (and thus not always accurate - perhaps deliberately so) where Alice is concerned#But he is also a direct contemporary eyewitness and is thus invaluable as a source. His importance can never be emphasized enough.#More importantly however - the image of Alice as a transgressive woman with improper influence who 'hijacked' the kingdom#is not merely painted by Walsingham or limited to his account#It's how these other sources - the monk at St. Mary's and the Bishop of Rochester - depicted her as well#('it is not fitting nor safe for all the keys of the kingdom to hang from the belt of one wife' is pretty telling in more ways than one)#as did contemporary literature of the time like Chaucer's 'Wife of Bath' and William Langland's Lady Meed in 'Piers Plowman'#the whole point of the Good Parliament & the Parliament after Edward III's death was to simultaneously restrict her influence & punish her#So...I'd say Walsingham's image of Alice (unfortunately) tracks with how she was widely perceived at the time#Of course that doesn't mean that this image shouldn't be reassessed and recontextualized#Misogyny and classism very demonstrably played a huge role in how Alice was regarded by contemporaries#Ormrod has also pointed out that no matter the extent of Alice's influence she would ultimately always be limited by the practical#reality of being a woman and a commoner#'Her sex and status simply did not allow her the regular and acknowledged access to power enjoyed by politically ambitious male favourites'#It is not impossible that she was 'a symbol rather than a cause' of the crisis in Edward III's late reign#And of course it's true that WERE people who defended her publicly and privately even after Edward's death as Walsingham himself admits#She can't have been as universally detested as most people think#(we should also consider Walsingham's deriding comment about her 'seductiveness' ie: she was probably very witty and charismatic)#But ofc none of this change the fact that Walsingham's image of Alice's 'impropriety' transgressiveness was a widespread one#Nor does it change the fact that this image was fundamentally rooted in the very real and impressive power she had#Alice WAS proactive and acquisitive and wildly influential (Edward III listened to her over several of his own children ffs)#She DID have more power and visibility than any other royal mistress in medieval England#She DOES seem to have acted in ways that would have been perceived as 'inverting queenship'#*That's okay*. Alice's actions & image should absolutely be recontextualized and given more sympathy than they are#but I have absolutely no intention of diminishing or downplaying them either. That's why I love her so much.
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i have to wonder what super hardcore militant vegans think should be done about obligate carnivore animals, because in all my painfully-rapidly-approaching-30-years i've literally never actually seen anyone give a clear consistent much less halfway feasible answer on that
#mostly i've just seen like “how dare you ask questions you just want an excuse to murder you're sealioning ect”#or worse some vague and wildly improbable nonsense about like. fake robot animals covered in beyond meat or something equally convoluted#which is a thing i did see someone suggest as a serious answer#i mean i already know they think i'm a genetically inferior hateful vampire that should starve to death for the greater good#because my exact combination of health conditions make meat basically the only semi-safe way i can get close to enough nutrients#i know this because they have repeatedly told me that i'm either evil or should be sacrificed or both#and yelled at me for asking questions by bringing up the whole disabled thing and then they're like#“a lot of vegans i know are advocates for disability!” as if that ever means jack shit in the society that results from anything#no matter what you do a vast majority of people in any given society will *not* be advocates for the disabled. i'm sorry they just won't.#and what do you think public perception of people who physically can't survive like that is going to skew towards#in a society founded on the belief that non-vegan diets are evil?#at absolute best we're looking at being a heavily marginalized class generally seen as something like vampires and our existences taboo.#(as if these type's own insistence that they should be allowed to harass and shame people doesn't disprove their assertion that we won't be#thinking it could possibly go any better than that is a fucking fairy tale. human nature doesn't work that way.#you simply cannot eliminate the human desire to designate and abuse a class of have-nots. the absolute best you can do is mitigate damage.#take it from someone who's been multiple kinds of disabled and chronically ill all my life. people will not “just”. ever.#i get this even from people who are otherwise very aware of and VERY GOOD at avoiding this sort of thinking#“i'm a disability advocate!” no you are not. you are a poster. my experience has taught me that what people advocate for in their free time#means precisely jack shit for how they will actually act when faced with the situations they make otherwise rational posts about#and the fact of the matter is even if you somehow really are the perfect disability advocate a majority of people WILL NOT BE YOU.#a majority of people in society will be margrat from accounting who clutches her pearls when she sees the gays and thinks autism isnt real#and who has never had a nuanced thought in her life and actively does not want to#a vast majority of people in your Vegan Utopia will not be you and your friends who march with wheelchair users and volunteer at the shelte#a vast majority of people in your Vegan Utopia will be jenny who starved 8 cats to death on broccoli because she can't be bothered#and who thinks that “carnivores” are actual nazis and don't deserve healthcare because she saw someone say that online.#ALWAYS assume your society will be made up mostly of the worst kind of person it can because it WILL ALWAYS BE TRUE and you can't change it#most people seek the low-effort option. and evil is most often banal and low-effort.#i'm just so fucking tired of every single even vaguely lefty-adjacent political movement simultaneously acting like i don't fucking exist#and at the same time that i need to be sacrificed to achieve Utopia. god. at least conservative whackjobs are upfront and honest about#how they think that i'm a burden on society that needs to be Eugenics'd . rather than trying to morally gaslight me about it.
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mako-neexu · 7 months
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this manhwa is sooo goooddd usually the villainess wants to live... but she wants to die lmao i love it. the take on being transmigration to a novel where the FL does not want to be here (since usually they just comes to terms with it in time) and has identity crisis along the way, forgetting who she was before inhabiting the current body shes in, the literal world bending reality just to fulfill a destiny set in stone so no matter what she does not die until she accomplishes that that body must do ughh so gooooood...
ive expected helena to be a white lotus female character to the story but i really like that she really is good deep down. shes advised to be naive to survive but as the different!eris changed almost everyone's lives, helena matured in her own way, initially feeling nothing more than friendship with the crown prince, the ending showed with her simply giving a him a look of pity and indifference, a look that his mother gave him since he was born. he used her without even asking helena's feelings and nobody even asked her what she felt for him.. so he really was nothing more than a friend to her right from the beginning. the ending showed with her giving him a look that would haunt him for the rest of his life.
i really liked priest hubris lol he was so cute but the obssessiveness he had to different!eris intensified that i cant help but kinda wish he fell in love with helena, like what the original novel said so he wouldnt have had to suffer... but then again his mother issues got to him lmao. same goes for jason where he should have just fallen in love with helena but got obssessed with FL instead (i just noticed a lot of them have greek names huh? man i love it. the way the pieces fall into place is really good but it really is funny the ML is named after skywalker lol)
when it revealed that OG!eris wished to disappear and it came true was spine chilling. seriously, its amazing. can you imagine doing your everyday routine and when you wake up, you are in a world far different from your own where you realize you are in the body of one of the characters in a novel you read, the skin, the flesh you feel is not yours, not yours, feeling someone else's skin clinging so tightly against yours it doesnt feel real yet you still feel your heartbeat, your breath, your pulse. but as time passes it eventually fits the wearer, a skin tight suit that suffocates you, its face plastered for so long on you that you begin to cry for your face- and then you realize the walking skin suit you were wearing all along has been a corpse. its owner dead the moment she fervently wished to disappear because the world hated her, because the prince never returned her love (wished for her to never have been born), born a villainess for the sake of the story's happy ending, unfortunately granted because of a wish from the person who loved her like a daughter and because of a force beyond their circumstances.
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