tw! alcohol
the shift is so subtle that had you known him just a little less, you would have missed it.
but as it is, there isn't anyone you know better, if the ring on your finger is any indication.
you lean into his side a bit more, emptying the rest of your drink before tilting up to peck at the edge of his jaw. "ready to go, honey?"
osamu presses into your touch as if on instinct, his smile soft and grateful, his arm around your waist flexing. "how did ya know?" his fingers squeeze at the outside of your thigh in appreciation before he takes your empty cup and stacks his over it and downs the meager dregs of his drink, too.
you smile back at him, watch his adam's apple bob when he swallows, marvel at how handsome he looks just doing the most mundane things. you shrug in answer, as if it hadn't been obvious only to you. it's in the tired droop of his eyes despite the little spark of contentment in them (imperceptible to anyone else), the slight sag of his broad shoulders. exhaustion was catching up to him, delayed by the initial joy of seeing his friends again. "let's go home."
he kisses your forehead, always reciprocating for every tender little action, before standing and bringing you up with him, grinning when you giggle.
you're side by side saying your goodbyes, feeling him squeeze your hand when you indulge his brother in "one more shot for the road", see the good-natured roll of his eyes out of the corner of yours right before you lean in to kiss a drunkenly enthusiastic atsumu goodbye on the cheek.
it may be the buzz of that last drink that brings heat seeping up into your face, but you have reason to believe it could just as well be the kiss osamu gives you just before he closes your car door for you, always the gentleman. that tender warmth doesn't leave you long after the alcohol has worn off, after all.
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if you ever want to talk about your thoughts on joyce .. Peeks over the corner of your blog. i love talking and hearing ppls thoughts on joyce sooo much even if they're different from my own!! and your analysis and stuff is always so well thought out
i hope u dont mind if i answer this publicly to take advantage of th request nd get my ideas out ther (also tyvm im happy u like my insane takes on these idiots, iv ben thinking abt them for almost 10 years)
i said a lot here so gnna 'read more' it
iv ben building trans charlie n my head fr, like i said, nearly 10 years. i used to view him as cis bcuz i always try to take as much frm th source material as i can wen i craft my HCs nd i had v personal (stupid) hangups insofar as him explicitly referring to his junk multiple times nd bottom surgery simply not being on my radar as a naive littl trans idiot deep in th sauce tht transmen oftn fall into w phallo being viewed so so poorly
evn still i leaned towards transmasc charlie nd always lovd moments tht let me imagine, for a moment, it being true, like his discomfort w taking off his shirt [hundred dollar baby, charlie kelly: king of the rats, the gang exploits the mortgage crisis, young charlie and mac deleted scenes, etc etc etc], or bonnie yelling abt ppl stealing her "charlie-girl" [the waitress is getting married] which i lovd to see as her accidentally misgendering him while drunk off her ass.
having grown out of my phallo issues (nd if ur reading this and u still view phallo super poorly, please do some research and grow too), ive in recent years fully subscribed to transmasc/nb charlie, and view his timeline something like this:
baby -> elementary: charlie refers to himself as a boy, doesnt "come out," simply has no idea he's afab. bonnie lets him dress however he wants and refers to him as asked. when charlie gets confused about his genitals, bonnie says his dick will grow in later lol, makes charlie wear a dress in public restrooms and tells him its just a game
middle: puberty hits and charlie gets confused and scared. bonnie puts him on blockers w.o explaining them ("my mom used to vaccinate me like every month" [the gang gets quarantined]) charlie goes on content and oblivious. STP acquired because hes "a late bloomer" and his dicks still not growing in?? weird. confides this in mac once, but he doesn't understand.
high: charlie finally registers that he's trans after forgetting theres a health class 1 day and not being able to skip it. throws him for a loop a bit but he becomes actively invested in his goals. he gets to start T and wants to have surgeries. "what guy hasnt done some extensive research on his own genitalia?" [mac is a serial killer]
college (aged): able to surgically transition (ty medicare) and continues on with life as we kno him now
joyce, imo, fits neatly into these views.
as a transmasc nb who came out young nd prefers to be seen as just A Guy by strangers, i grew up v vehemently against anything girly that might get me misgendered, but th more i began to 'pass,' th more @ home n my body i felt, th more and more comfortable i am w femininity, th more i wdnt mind putting on a dress, as long as th general public wd see me as "a man in women's clothes." n my mind, i prescribe something not exactly th same but v similar to charlie.
i see charlie "i dont really identify" kelly as afab and nb. i see joyce as a "character" he originally created to distance himself from the dysphoria of putting on a dress as a young trans boy, but that became part of him as the hard lines he drew in the sand as a child became blurry with age and self acceptance. charlie's comfort with himself allows joyce to evolve into a more solid persona, one he enjoys embodying and allowing to become a permanent facet of who he is. he's ok with being referred to as either. they're both him.
so maybe joyce comes out a bit more outside of the bathroom now.
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Obey me
soft luci head canons ♡
Gender neutral reader ♡
I thought this would be so cute considering how he never lets his guard down unless he’s a round mc 💗
Lemme kno if u want me to do this with one of the other brothers or dataebles <33
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-whenever he’s had a particularly stressful day of doing paper work mixed with the disaster his brothers cause he finds you and drags to by the hand to his bedroom just to push u down and the bed and cuddle. And you cannot tell me this man isn’t the little spoon when he’s feeling stressed out he rests his head on top of your chest and his hands grabbing your waist while he falls asleep to you massaging his head
-lucifer hates pda so when u two are alone you can finally grab his face and force him to listen to how much u love him when ur finally done singing ur praises he stutters how he loves you to bowing his head to try hide his blush and when everyone comes back into the room there wondering what you’ve done for lucifer to have pink on his cheeks
-lucifer always overworks himself with piles of paper work until late in the night due to this you check on him every night to make sure he’s getting enough hours of sleep and tell him that he doesn’t need to worry and that he can finish it tomorrow and when he wants to be stubborn and not go to bed u can easily convince him to come to bed by promising him cuddles he denies that saying that works but we both know it does
-at night time he goes around the house giving small goodnight kisses on each his brothers cheeks and sometimes strokes their hair a little bit (🥹) and then when it’s ur turn he full on lifts you out of ur bed and carries you to his
-loves laying his head on your chest it lets him know that ur ok and that ur with him he finds comfort in ur heartbeat
-before u guys started dating he would always feel so nervous around you his heart beating 12x faster then normal sweaty palms blush on his cheeks and he would sometimes stutter at least one of his words when he would talk to u
-he admires you from a distance always wondering how he got so lucky considering how prideful he is he would of never made the first move he’s lucky you came to him
-he likes going shopping with you and likes it when you ask him what he thinks of your outfit in the changing rooms he likes the fact his opinion matters the most to you
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So while I'm Saying Shit, I also have a problem with this idea that El was upset that Mike wasn't saying I love you specifically because her love language is words of affirmation so she really needed to hear it? I mean, first of all I think the idea of love languages is mostly useful as a quick generalized way to discuss how we respond to and express affection—a messy nuanced human behavior thing that is hard to talk about, and the show is written with that nuance, but even then I don't think El particularly craves or requires words to feel loved anymore than anyone else does. I think in s4 she was really just confused about why her boyfriend was refusing to say the word 'love' under any circumstance to her? Especially after she heard him say it once already and then she said it back to his face in response so its like, he said he loves me before and I let him know I feel the same and now he won't say it again? Not even as a way to end letters—a normal thing people do for someone who means much less to them than she supposedly does to him sooooooooooo like what's the fucking deal? The contents of the letters sure implies he holds a lot of affection for her and he brings her flowers in her favorite colors and ok we're in love and then he signs 'from' on the card and its like ????? like even as the audience you're supposed to be confused lol like he clearly has some kind of hang up I wonder what it is? Then after El smashes a girl's face in she thinks "oh yeah, the hang up is that he actually hates me because I'm evil haha lemme just start projecting real quick" and then, you know, s4 happens. I mean, it's not like she doesn't value words at all, I just don't think her relationship to them is particularly tied to her trauma like people say, or if anything, maybe she values them less because that's all Brenner would ever give her? Like, perhaps the big Love Confession hits the hardest because it came after Mike and company spent a week or whatever driving across the entire western united states to save her from the government. Idk, something to chew on.
Honestly, if anyone's love language is words its Mike lmao he's the one whos constantly telling El how amazing she is. He's also desperately trying to tell her he loves her in like 5 scenes (arguably succeeding except for not saying the actual word in most of them) before he actually does like, he wants to so bad it almost comes spilling out of his mouth against his will (except for that one time it does ha) he's just terrified of doing so because it would essentially be ripping his entire beating heart out of his chest and handing it to this powerful-in-every-way girl on a silver platter for her to do whatever she wants with—like crushing it into a fine paste in front of his eyes, killing him instantly and preventing him from having the strength to love anything ever again. Like, the other half of the love language thing is that you also speak the love language, meaning you are more likely to show affection by doing the thing you want for other people, and Mike does this waaaaay more than El does for anyone actually (something I would love to see her do more in s5 lowkey. Like, she was at a severe disadvantage before and was too busy dealing with her own shit to have a ton of emotional energy for anyone else so it makes sense, but we're matured now. I think now is the time for a heart-to-heart that goes both ways u kno).
If I wanted to be cute, I could argue that both Mike and El's main love language is actually acts of service. They're both little heroes who jump at the chance to do anything for the people they love with no regard for their own personal wellbeing. Also, adorably, the thing that gets them back together in s3 is Mike saving El from Billy, which El responds to by helping him and Lucas with the vending machine. One offering of m&ms later and we're back baybee it's the quiet understanding that no matter what they'll always be there for each other for meeee
If I'm not being cute I'm saying the idea that everyone has a main 'love language' is bullshit and you're gonna appreciate different things at different times and people are not that easily categorized but it's still a good jumping off point for discussion so—
Anyway El saves the world and Mike saves her and they're dying in each other's arms thank you for your time <3
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✿❁Observations on Venus ♀︎and Mars♂︎ signs ❁✿
🍵Virgo - so Virgo rules the 6th house of health/well being. Virgo is also the perfectionist. Y’all have definite HIGH ass standards (I can relate: I’m a Virgo moon) what I’ve noticed is that strong virgo placements tend to like “fit” peeps, like they admire when you work out or have some kind of work out routine. Oh and plz be clean and smell nice 4 them 🧼🫧🧴😇 also “acts of service” is their Numbero uno love language “ babe I took out the trash 444 u 😏”
🍵Leo: y’all rule the heart ❤️ chakra so it’s really about love for u. Like u care less about looks and more about how much ur heart feels in tune with them. U love romance, but old school romance 💘 like 🍷 wine and dine 🍛🍽️me then call me daddy 😩lol. U usually date someone who’s a lil high maintenance, maybe a bit of a drama queen/king🤴👸iz da royal vibe tho.
🍵Capricorn : It’s def about brains for u 🧠🧐Like u can’t do dum dum babes- it makes u pucker in disdane. U want someone with goals, dreams. Someone who u can stand next 2 and be proud of. Like, this bish is a CEO of their company 🤑damnnnn. U like structure/control. Ur probs a bit of a control freak. 🪢It’s otay, just remember u can only control ur own needs. Truth is u need to feel secure to let ur guard down (probs where the control comes in) just like ur sister sign Cancer 🤗
🍵Aquarius: similar to Virgo, y’all tend to like fit, skinner peeps. You like someone that’s a little off the cuff, whether it’s how they think, dress or have like one lazy eye or some shit. 😎😎😎 the cool underdogs are ur cup of tea 🍵 for shore. U enjoy space in the relationship. Space literally 👽🛸and space between seeing each other..like u can literally go weeks without hangin with the other. My Pisces Venus shudders lol 😂
🍵Cancer: you’re the mother, the nurturer 🌝 so u want someone that is compassionate, sweet 🍰🍭🧁and receptive. You don’t like when someone is 2 aggressive 👿Just like the crab 🦀 u hide in ur shell 🐚 if someone is like “hey bb, let’s fuck” Just like the tides of the moon 🌚 🌝u can be moody so u need someone to be able to hold ur emotions. Be gentle with them. Be patient. The sweetest love 💗
🍵Scorpio: ya’ll naturally attract mystics 🪄🧚♂️🧝♀️and witchy 🧙♀️types. Who’s to say these types are ur ideal tho. Maybe they be, maybe not. U like deep deep divin into the psychological 🔎👩🏫underpinnings of ur lover. U want 2 kno every lover they’ve had before u, u just do ok, even if it hurts u. Lol. U like deep, soulful seggs 🫦🤫When u trust, u give endlessly, but when ur betrayed, u get daggers 🗡️ in ur eyes.
🍵Aries: oh gawd, y’all just love the chase 🏃♀️🏃🏃♂️don’t u ? 🍒 u love it so much that when things settle down, u don’t know what to do with yourself lol. Das why, u love independence, u also like it when the person is direct, but plz let an Aries take the lead lol. U like when the person surprises you 😱🤯😲keeps things fresh 🍑🍆Clingy is the opposite of what u need. But u contradict because ur secretly a BiG baby 👶🏻🍼🤗inside that needs to be coddled lol. Dilemma 🤔
🍵Pisces: it me ! So Venus is exalted in Pisces. It means Venus just LOVES 🥰🥰🥰being in Pisces, it’s the honorary guest y’all. So sweet, so sentimental, so love. Gotta be careful tho, cus u can put peeps on pedestals 🧎♀️🛐with dem rose 🌹 colored glasses 🤓 lol. If you’ve ever been loved by a Venus in Pisces, count urself lucky 🍀 AF. They will love u so deeply, cosmically 🔮and without boundaries- the purest love on this earth plane y’all. I cry 🥺🥺🥺
🍵Gemini: I like to call this Venus placement, mind fuckers: u fuck with ur mind 💭💬🗯️All the air placements do honestly. No mind connection, GTFO. I’d say y’all are less sexually aggressive tbh. More flowy (unless u got some srs fire placements, cus fire placements do be smashing all day long) again, like Aquarius, u like space 🛸☄️🚀in ur relationships. Hella flirty 🫦🫦🫦with ur words (most air placements are btw) one thing; if these cats lose interest in u, the number 1 tall tell sign is they stop communicating 🙊🙊🙊as frequently lol
🍵Sagittarius: usually you’re into foreign peeps, because Sag rules the 9th house of foreign places 🌁🌆🌌🚞🧳🚢You like the unknown, so u seek it. Someone who speaks a different language 🗣️than u is such a turn on. Someone who drinks coffee differently from u is such a turn on. Ur less discriminatory when it comes to looks- very open minded 🙌After all, y’all are the explorers of the zodiac. You want to explore ALL the options big, small, in between etc 😏😏😏
🍵Taurus: cus ur ruled by Venus…ngl, u like pretty, u like beauty 💋💄👗. U like when someone is put together and cute. U like good manners and nice smells 👃U like to take it slow and steady, becus they always win 🏆 the race ya kno ? U like sensory feels, like ur probs into some domination in bed yes yes ??? ⛓️🔗U like honesty, consistency and stability. Don’t lie to them…you’ll never be forgiven ever ever ever.
🍵Libra: also ruled by Venus, so u like someone clean, lean and charming. Ur a natural flirt 🫦so u don’t mind if ur other is one too. Keeps things fresh right ? U like someone that says please and thank you. Ur a sucker for a pretty face, but a bigger sucker for a pretty brain. The two combined: big time score 4 u. Y’all really love love 🥰🥰🥰u like bein in love and thinkin about it and romanticizing about it but when ur in it, u just can’t decide - u probs left someone on read a couple times and ghosted 👻them cus u felt pressure to decide lol. 🥲
Das all y’all ! Hope this was helpful 🤗🤗🤗
Thanks so much 444 reading and supporting !
Love y’all 🥰🥰🥰🥰
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