#( never had to sb someone for liking what they like but my GOD !!! )

[kokoronohiroi]

finally … peace …

[zepskies]

Lost on You - Part 1

Pairing: Soldier Boy/Ben x F. Supe!Reader

Summary: 1983 is a big year for you. You’re finally chosen to join the ranks of Payback, led by the most (in)famous supe in the world: Soldier Boy. He’ll never admit that he’s trying his damndest to figure you out. You’ll never admit that he’s actually growing on you. But the problem with this game is deciding who’s the predator, and who is prey.

AN: Welcome to Part 1! You guys have really warmed by heart with all the anticipation for this series, so thank you so much. I think it's going to be a fun ride. 😉

Song Inspo: “Magic” by Olivia Newton-John. And check out the full “Lost on You Playlist” here. There’s going to be lots of ‘80s music in this series!

Word Count: 4K

Tags/Warnings: SB being an entitled asshole (strap in for a lot of that), misogyny, bullying, and a “meet cute” of sorts…

🎙️ Series Masterlist || YouTube Playlist || Spotify Playlist

Part 1: Siren Song

April 3, 1983

“Why the fuck wasn’t I consulted about this?” Soldier Boy groused.

Arthur Cohen, otherwise known as “The Legend,” released a heavy puff of his cigar within the relative privacy of his office. Vought afforded him a great deal of luxuries, at the cost of days like this.

So, he’d offered the supe one of his most coveted Cubans to pacify him. Because true to form, he was edging closer to a temper tantrum by the minute.

“This decision came from on high, my friend,” Arthur said, with a smile that hid his inner anxiousness. He tapped some ash off his cigar with a finger adorned by a gaudy gold ring. “Stan Edgar, Stillwell, even the entire board of directors signed off on this one.”

“I don’t give a fuck who bought into this PR bullshit,” Soldier Boy postured, crossing his arms across his dark green supe suit as he leaned into the plush seat adjacent to Arthur’s desk. He raised a solid boot on the edge of the newly polished mahogany, and then another, crossing them at the ankles. His cigar was balanced between his teeth in the corner of his mouth.

“The last thing we need,” he said, pausing to inhale. Then he took the cigar from his lips to blow out smoke in hot annoyance. “Is another broad on the team.”

Arthur inclined his head. “I understand your concerns.”

“Do you?” Soldier Boy snorted. “Countess is bitch enough to deal with, believe you me.”

Arthur sympathized. He knew Crimson Countess’s attitude well, but he supposed Soldier Boy had license to say so more than anyone else, considering she was his girlfriend.  

“Look, I could give you the numbers: expected profit margins, demographics, etcetera, but you don’t get paid to hear that from me,” Arthur said, with a magnanimous hand gesture and a fair bit of old Jewish charm. “I’m askin’ you to trust me. This girl’s good, okay? Not just a wig and a pair a’ tits. Nah, she’s got talent. Got a set of pipes on her too, my God.”

Soldier Boy gave him a sly look. 

“Not like that,” Arthur said. He shook his head in amusement, but not with the face of a man who hadn’t already thought about the girl’s pretty mouth. He stroked his chin.

“She’s…interesting. Well, you’ll see. If she brings up the ratings the way we hope, we’ll be able to relocate Swatto. Hopefully to Siberia. He’s a fucking PR nightmare waiting to happen.”

“All right, the guy’s a moron, but he’s fucking hilarious,” Soldier Boy said, smirking. “Like one of the three Stooges.”

Yeah. Arthur wondered if that homeless man Swatto almost split open in Central Park after a sneeze thought he was funny. 

“And her powers. Really?” Soldier Boy went on. His brows drew together then, as he frowned. “Sounds like she blew something up someone’s ass to get this far, and it ain’t smoke.”

“Trust me, that’s the real deal too,” Arthur assured.

But he could see that Soldier Boy wasn’t convinced. The supe rolled his eyes and released another puff.

“Anyway. I’m fucking bored. What’s the next project?” he said. Arthur took an unfiltered breath and peeked at the files strewn across his desk.

“Well, Red Thunder is coming out this fall. We’re pretty sure it’s gonna be the blockbuster of the year,” he replied. “After that, we’ll see about writing a sequel.”

If it makes back the millions we spent in production going over budget, thanks to this asshole’s weekly benders, he mentally added.

“I don’t care about a bullshit sequel,” Soldier Boy said dismissively. “I want to do something new.”

“Something new,” Arthur intoned.

The supe raised a brow. Again, the cigar was balanced between his teeth.

“Yeah.”

He really must be bored, Arthur thought, if he actually wants to work.

“All right, let me brainstorm on that for ya,” Arthur said. “Matter of fact, tell you what. Give me ‘til the end of the week. In the meantime, we’ve got the security team monitoring the police scanner for potential saves.”

The supe didn’t look impressed. His brows furrowed, as if he was irritated that he didn’t get an immediate answer, but his slight nod signaled his agreement before he finally got up from his chair. His boots dragged off Arthur’s desk, knocking over a framed picture of his kids with it, and thudded heavily on the ground. He left the office thereafter.

Arthur heaved a breath of exasperation. He didn’t get paid enough for this shit. 

Fucking supes.

But he didn’t dare utter that thought out loud.

It was days before Ben finally crossed paths with the new girl. Not that he’d been giving the idea much thought.

After that day in Arthur’s office, Ben became engrossed in his own devices—namely one of the assistants, Joanna, his stylist, Angela, and Rachel, his maid, after Donna blew him off for dinner for the third night in a row. This time for some tree-hugging conservationist gala of some kind. 

Frigid bitch, he thought, shaking his head. 

On his way to the gym, he passed the T&T Twins gossiping. Just the sight of them irritated him. Tommy was a kiss-ass, and Tessa shared a brain cell with her brother, so she wasn’t saying much for her gender either. 

“Would you pick your tongue off the floor already! You’re so disgusting,” Tessa said, shoving her brother.

“What? She’s fucking hot,” Tommy snapped in defense. When they finally saw Ben coming, Tessa piped down with her attempt at a “demure” greeting.

Tommy came in hot with a too bright voice and a, “Hey, boss!”

Ben gave them a stoic nod, fully intending to blow past them.

“Have you met the new girl yet?” Tommy asked, with an unmistakable pop of his brows and indecent smile.

Ben nearly rolled his eyes. “No.”

And don’t fucking care, his tone conveyed. He continued on his way to the gym. Behind him, the twins gave each other a look, and a shrug.

When he got to the gym, Journey was playing overhead. Ben frowned as he saw Black Noir working out by himself. The young man wasn’t wearing his suit. Instead, he was bare-chested and running on a treadmill with a nearly 90-degree incline, sweat glistening on his skin. 

Fucking show off, Ben thought. 

Then there was Gunpowder, his young sidekick, practicing his archery. Ben went to him and slapped a hand on his back in greeting, none too gently. The teen stumbled, his arrow landing into the wall instead of the target. 

“Spot me at the bench, ey kid,” said Ben. “And grab me a towel while you’re at it.”

“Uh, sure,” Gunpowder replied, ducking his head as he went. Ben got settled at his usual bench press machine, sliding his back down the thin leather cushion. He waited for the kid to add on his fifty-pound weights on either side, until it reached two hundred pounds. That was just the warm-up. 

“You met the new girl yet?” Ben asked, after he began lifting his first rep. Gunpowder stood behind his head.  

“No, sir,” he said. “Haven’t seen her yet.”

“I haven’t either,” said Noir. He’d come over on his way to the showers, regaining his breath all the while. Ben gave him a sharp side-eye.

“Did I fucking ask you?” he said. 

Noir paused. He hid his frown behind a stoic front, since he didn’t have his mask to do it for him. He toweled off his face and chest as he left the gym. 

Ben shook his head, but he never broke stride on the bench press. 

You seemed to be mysterious. 

Barely anyone had seen you, and you hadn’t gone out of your way to ingratiate yourself with every member of the team, like Ben would’ve expected. Donna had set him in her sights on her very first day.

With fake demure in her hazel eyes, a flick of her long red hair over her shoulder, and a sultry smile, she’d let him take her hand and bring it up to his lips for a gentlemanly kiss. 

That same night, she’d accepted his invitation up to his suite and let him do some very ungentlemanly things. Ben smirked at the memory as he made his way down Vought Tower’s infinite hallways. She sure knew her way around some kinky shit.  

And she still did, the little minx. She’d just been putting the freeze on his balls lately, for whatever her reasons were this time. He didn’t pretend to care or keep track at this point. 

If people only knew what a royal pain Crimson Countess was.

Ben was only taken out of his thoughts when he heard someone singing in the breakroom, gently, but beautifully. He couldn’t make out the words though. He stopped and leaned inside the doorway, just to see who it was. It was early enough in the morning that he was surprised anyone but him was awake.

You were standing there at the counter, making some coffee from the percolator. Soft and dulcet notes fell from your lips in some kind of lullaby. Quirking a brow, the oddness of it managed to draw Ben’s steps into the kitchen. You were wearing a leather supe suit that molded to your every curve, not unlike Donna’s, except yours was black with violet trim lines.

You eventually noticed him with a smile.

“Good morning, sir.”

Ben gave you a charming grin, blatantly eying you from breast to toe before he noted that the coffee had finished percolating. 

"Hey there, sweetheart,” he said. “Pour me a cup, would ya?" 

You did so, and he admired the graceful movements of your hands, and the sweet sound of your voice as you continue to hum to yourself. 

"You're a little crooner, aren't you?" he asked, taking the plain white coffee mug from you. 

When your hand brushed his, he felt it.

Your power.

It threatened to overtake him, drawing you into him like the crash and current of a tidal wave, where he couldn’t help but be pulled undertow. There in that darkness, he craved your warmth as well as your body. The thought, the need gripped him at his core… 

He wanted you to devour him, body and soul.

And he finally registered that your eyes were glowing violet, along with your knowing smile. 

Then you blinked. The violet haze was gone, along with your hold on his mind. 

You went back to sipping your coffee as if nothing had just happened. Ben faltered, mentally and physically as he was forced to grip the counter. He even had to catch his breath as his mind reeled from the loss of connection. 

He covered his unbalance with a steely, angry frown. What the fuck just fucking happened?

He looked at you harder than before, drawing himself to his full height and towering over you. Still, you didn’t seem all that intimidated.

“What the hell did you just do?” he growled.

Your knowing, easy smile remained. 

“Nothing,” you replied. “Just a little smoke.”

Ben’s eyes widened.

“Sounds like she blew something up someone’s ass to get this far, and it ain’t smoke.”

How the hell had you heard about that?

He quirked a brow, but you just sipped your coffee with a gentle slurp. Your gaze moved away from him as you went to the fridge to take out a carton of eggs.

“Want some breakfast? I’m thinking of making some eggs, sunny side up,” you said.

Ben’s hand clenched at his side, but then, he forced himself to relax. Or at least, to look relaxed. You had some fucking audacity to try toying with him…but he had to admit, you were something new.

Interesting.

“What’s your name?” he asked, in a tone that demanded.

“Sirena,” you answered. Your superhero name, which he’d already known when Stan Edgar told him about you a week ago.

Ben’s frown deepened, but he reminded himself to retain some charm. He took your chin between his fingers. His grip was light, but his green eyes were intense, and focused on you. 

“No. Your real name, sweetheart,” he said, brushing your cheek with his thumb.

You blinked, but you obliged him with your name, and a smile that edged at flirtation.

“What’s yours?” you returned.

He had to smirk. He knew you knew full well who he was.

“Call me Ben,” he said.

Three Days Ago…

You tried not to be completely overwhelmed by the sight of this huge tower as you pulled your suitcase behind you. Vought-American was an institution of superhero production, and Payback was the face of it all. The absolute pinnacle.

I still can’t believe they chose me, you thought, but you tried not to let that show. You needed to make it seem like you knew what you were doing. You belonged here, and you were seizing this chance.

Madelyn Stillwell, the head of Superhero Public Relations, personally greeted you at the gate and showed you up to your room. However, you’d barely gotten a chance to step inside and look around before her pager went off. She wore a certain smile when she saw the number on the screen. She tossed a strand of strawberry blonde hair over her shoulder and glanced up at you.

“Sorry, sweetie. I have an appointment to get to, but the directory is there on your desk if you need anything. Feel free to get comfortable,” she said, gesturing at you with her pager in hand. “I’ll be back in an hour or so to give you a tour of the building.”

“Okay, thank you so—”

The door closed behind her before you could even finish your sentence. That deflated you a little, but you tried not to let that small exchange bring you down. Your apartment was huge. Or at least, it was much bigger than the shoebox you left in the Village, let alone the Brooklyn brownstone you grew up in, sharing with two other families on each floor.

You hefted your suitcase onto the bed and began to unpack your clothes, makeup, and toiletries. 

You also took out the only framed picture you had—one that housed your parents and your older brother Chris. You were both grown already, but in this picture, you were barely twelve years old. That little girl didn’t know that her entire world was about to change, when her powers manifested for the first time. 

That thought did succeed in dimming your mood for a moment, but you sighed and set the frame down on your new dresser. You’d have to remember to call Chris. His son was turning four years old in a few weeks. 

Though your attention shifted to a black shape in the corner of your eye. It was a garment bag hanging on the closet door. You went over and unzipped it, revealing your new super suit. It was all black leather and violet accent lines down the sides, along the collar, and down between the breasts in a V-shape. It was strategic to accentuate curves and bust. 

You whistled lowly. It was beautiful, but Jesus did it look tight. 

“Wow,” you remarked, trying out the zipper up and down. “They really like their leather, huh?”

Still, you itched to try it on. After a few minutes of struggling and wiggling, you managed to get into the suit. They’d taken exact measurements, so it did look good. You felt like a new person…a superhero.

You smiled at yourself in the bathroom mirror. But then, you forced the smile off your face and shook your head, schooling your expression into something less doe-eyed and pathetic. More in control.

There you are, Sirena, you thought. You had long ago trained yourself with that enigmatic look. You knew how it felt on your face. The easiest way for you to get what you wanted in this world, the way you’d gotten this far, was with this exact face.

Only show them what you want them to see.   

Almost two hours later, you’d finished unpacking your belongings and explored every corner of your new beautiful apartment, but still, Miss Stillwell wasn’t back yet.

You checked your watch and hummed to yourself. Your curiosity getting the best of you, you decided to leave your apartment and explore the tower by yourself. You took off the suit as well, so you could make your way around more anonymously. You were sure no one really knew who you were yet. 

Your theory was proven true when you walked through the halls, passing Vought employees without even a blink in your direction. That was okay though. Soon enough, all these people would know your face, as well as your name. 

You reached one of the top floors, where you thought you remembered The Legend’s office was supposed to be (according to the directory). Maybe you could meet him and get a jump start on your schedule.

You stopped short, however, when an office door slid open. Out came a slightly disheveled Miss Stillwell. Her blouse was hastily tucked into her gray pencil skirt, and strands of her blonde hair were a bit frizzy as they brushed her shoulders, as if she’d combed them down with her fingers. You plastered yourself to a wall around the corner, only peeking around after she passed by.

Your brows popped up incredulously when you read the name plate beside the door she just came out of.

Stan Edgar…holy shit. His signature was on my contract!

Along with Arthur Cohen, or The Legend, as Stillwell had told you when she welcomed you in. He was the Senior Vice President of Hero Management, so who the hell was Stan?

Well, whoever he was, he was giving it to the head of PR.

Okay then. You shook your head and continued on your way. At the end of the hall, you finally found the right office. You were about to open the door, when you heard male voices coming from inside—one older and dry, and the other deep and strong.

You reached out with your awareness and allowed your powers to engage, likely making your eyes glow with a violet hue.

Sure enough, you sensed two men in the room. And as the voices raised, you recognized one of them. It was unmistakable; you’d been taking the time to binge all of his movies for the past month, ever since you auditioned to get into Payback.

Soldier Boy. 

A smile spread across your face. For a moment, you were incredibly excited…until you actually heard what he was saying.

“The last thing we need is another broad on the team.”

Your mouth fell open in shock as your brows drew together. You carefully pressed yourself to the door and kept listening.

“And her powers. Really?” he said. “Sounds like she blew something up someone’s ass to get this far, and it ain’t smoke.”

“Trust me, that’s the real deal too,” Arthur assured.

You glared at the door furiously, as if you could burn lasers out of your eyes. You crossed your arms, but you breathed evenly as you strived to keep your emotions contained. 

Control, you reminded yourself. With another deep breath, you managed to let go of your ire, but the more you listened to the conversation, the more impossible that became. You turned away from the door and made clipped strides down the hall.

You knew you had to tread carefully here. You’d heard some of the real stories about Payback, because you’d taken the time to listen. You weren’t about to enter Vought Tower without having some idea of what you were getting into, and you knew you’d have to prove yourself as the rookie on the team. You just hadn’t expected their leader to be such a chauvinistic asshole. 

Though inwardly, you snorted. Well, the guy is from the ‘40s. Best generation, indeed.

You rolled your shoulders and shook it away, like water off your proverbial feathers. Your mouth set in a firm line as you held your head high.

The game begins, you thought.

For the next few days, you watched. You studied each member of your new “team” as you encountered them, and you quickly realized that this team wasn’t much of one. 

They looked out for themselves, and bickered amongst themselves, in the case of the TNT Twins. Crimson Countess had given you a lovely, polite face that still somehow mocked you when she walked away, along with the bounce of her red hair. 

Your powers didn’t allow you to sense or read women, but you recognized a diva when you saw one.

Clearly, she was used to being the woman on top, especially as Soldier Boy’s girlfriend. You wanted to roll your eyes at the thought. From what you’d heard (and the masculine cologne you smelled on Arthur’s assistant Joanna yesterday), Soldier Boy got around. His relationship with Countess was either very open, or it was well-crafted PR.

You had another growing, unsettling thought. The more information you gathered just by observing the team, the more you had a hard time believing that you were ever going to fit in around here. 

It was only your third day in the Tower though, you reminded yourself, as you got dressed for the day in your suit. That kind of negativity wouldn’t serve you here. 

So you left your apartment in search of coffee and breakfast at the breakroom and lounge area, exclusive to the team. You supposed these guys were either late sleepers, or they got their food brought to them. You were relieved to find the room empty, and you let out a deep breath.

Remember why you’re here, you thought. It’s not about you. 

It had never been about you. 

You rummaged through the cupboards in search of the one thing that would perk you up—good coffee. You found it near the top shelf and began to prep the coffee maker. You hummed to yourself while your hands moved on autopilot. The tune strengthened, deepening and then sweetening on higher trills. 

Suddenly, your spine prickled. Your mind buzzed faintly with awareness as you sensed a presence.

It was familiar and overwhelmingly male, with heavy, confident steps coming down the hall. You tilted your head and frowned. 

Soldier Boy, that asshole. 

But then, your lips curved upwards. This could be fun. 

When Soldier Boy walked into the breakroom, he noticed you. You pretended not to realize he was there, but you felt the heat of his gaze roaming over your body. You wanted to sigh. Predictable.

Right then, you made a quiet, firm decision. Today, this man was going to learn your name. And he wasn’t going to forget it. 

You turned to him with a smile when he approached—the most pleasant one you could manage.

“Good morning, sir.”

AN: Game, set, match. 😘💚 As many of you know, this story is expanding on this Soldier Boy imagine, which I wrote almost a year ago now. In the back of my mind though, I always thought this idea could be more someday.

So please let me know what you thought of Part 1! I'm so excited for you guys to see what's coming up next...

Next Time:

“Countess, I’m not trying to replace you. I’m not trying to take anything from you.”

“Except my boyfriend,” she shot back. Finally she turned her head towards you with cool disdain. “You think I didn’t see you flirting with him last night at the afterparty?”   

You rolled your eyes, though you hid a sliver of embarrassment. You should’ve known she’d spot that.

“He approached me, okay?” you said. Maybe you were about to let your pettiness to get the best of you, but you couldn’t help it. You smiled slyly. “And from what I hear, I’m the least of your worries. Looks like Ben has quite the appetite.”

The cracks of Countess’s cool façade finally broke through to anger.

▶️ Keep Reading: PART 2

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[lovelyladyabsinthewrites]

Do you find it all right, my dragonfly?

Warnings: downright traumatized adults who need to fucking heal their inner child, reader is also like hl where she's mentally unstable too but at least has a bit of her sanity, not really siblingxsibling, but there is implications, weird/uncomfortable relationships, god mentality, she may not be as bad as hl or sb she still sb's kid, i'm getting a hera and zeus vibe from them honestly, vought should hire a supe therapist or something, finale

Words: 1884

Summary: Years have passed since Soldier Boy's death in Nicaragua. But you and Homelander still suffer the curse of his blood.

🌸Did you get enough love, my little dove 🌸Well you do enough talk, my little hawk. 🌸shall we look at the moon, my little loon

Homelander's eyes pop open, immediately accomodating to the darkness in his room. Even in sleep he caught the subtle noise of the front door to his penthouse suite opening and closing. Normally he would have sprung into action and apprehend whoever dared to break into his home. Only taking him a millisecond to realize who it was, Homelander relaxes back into the mattress.

When he hears you tiptoe your way into his room, he sleepily mutters "Couldn't sleep?"

You don't reply. Simply peeling back the covers of his bed and slipping in next to him. You never imagined how much you'd miss your small home in the middle of nowhere until you moved into Vought Tower with your brother. There was no way you could live by yourself during your last year in high school. Vought wouldn't allow it and neither would Homelander.

Humming at your silence, Homelander shifts to lay on his side to face you. You didn't like how far away your suite was from your brother's. Back at home, he'd been on the other side of the paper-thin wall.

After a moment of quiet, you look up at him through your lashes. "Is it fucked up that I miss him?"

He sadly smiles. "No. I think it's natural. I kinda miss that asshole too."

It was always thought that Soldier Boy was invincible. As indestructible as a cockroach. Stan Edgar was the one to bring you the news from Nicaragua. You simply couldn't believe it as the truth. Soldier Boy killed. You'd sat there in a daze, Homelander to your left as he too stares at the stained carpet under the couch.

Every night since then you'd go to Homelander's room in the dead of night; unable to take how quiet and big it was in your own rooms. Embarrassing at your age that you still needed your big brother's company to sleep.

Homelander was the only person you can seek comfort from. Someone you'd bonded with through trauma.

His blue eyes are so bright in the darkness of his room. Your shade was much more subdued, like Soldier Boy's. Vivid and bold, like a streak of lightening.

"C'mere." He scooches closer to you and wraps his arms around your frame.

All too easily, you accept the security. As long as Homelander was there, you'd be fine.

Years later and it was still the same.

Only now the spotlight was on the both of you and if word ever got out that you shared a bed with your brother, heads would turn and Vought stock would plummet. No one would understand. Everyone would think it utterly disgusting. Not that anything bad happened. You simply couldn't sleep without Homelander being in the same bed as you and vice versa.

Maybe it was odd, but you ceased to care what others thought was normal. It was only Stillwell's private words to you an hour ago. scolding you like you're still that teenager who'd just lost her toxic father. And damnit did her condescending tone still work on you. Why was there a part of you that wanted her praise? Possibly that same teenager who'd grown up without a mother.

"Who cares what they think." Homelander scoffs when you hesitate to go into his suite. He still had his tacky supe suite on, the both of you having come back from a Vought gala event.

Vought's golden children. They sure did love to tote you and your brother out to the public. Everyone ate it up. The most powerful supes in the world. You were legacies after all. Born from the seed of the infamous Soldier Boy who died for his country. There were always Vought events that exploited this fact. It was fucking tiring.

You purse your lips, looking up and down the hall. As you expected though, no one was in sight. A strict rule that no one was to disturb this corridor as it contained the suites of you and the Homelander, the top supes in the entire world. Translucent didn't even dare to peep in on you and Homelander. You always knew he was there. He didn't need any warning. You were even more popular than Payback's twin duo. Both of you having been at the forefront in the creation of Vought's team known as the Seven. The members who would join soon after knew early on not to mess with you and Homelander. You were leagues above any of them. Not only that, but due to your childhoods being not so. . . ideal, both of you had your fair share of mental instabilities.

Try as you may, you were Soldier Boy's daughter. That enough meant you carried his curse. He cursed you with an unhealthy attachment to your brother. You saw how far off he was, having suffered more from Soldier Boy and Vought than you did. Even then you ignored some of the more questionable actions you'd witnessed Homelander commit while on assignments.

Blind loyalty.

"John." You quietly use his birth name to show that you were serious. His smile dampens until his brows fall too. "You know what they're saying."

"What they're saying, or what Edgar told you?"

"Actually your girlfriend told me." Snidely you remark on Homelander's twisted relationship with Madelyn. Seems both of you were to be doomed by unusual relationships.

The muscle below his eye twitches, a note of agitation which only your eyes were capable of catching.

"Regardless, there's truth behind her words. They're lower beings than us, to be sure, but if this gets out it'll be bad press for both of us and Vought." You heave before moving to go back down the hall. "At least. . . for a little bit."

After a moment, Homelander's obnoxious grin returns to his face and he rolls his eyes. He plays along. "Okay. If you say so. But you better not try to crawl into my bed tonight."

You scrunch up your nose before chuckling. "Ah c'mon. That's definitely something you shouldn't be saying to your sister!"

He doesn't attempt to stop you from going back to your suite though you feel his heavy gaze on your back.

As he'd predicted, you indeed came crawling back later that night to curl up against his back. You knew he had a smug smirk on his face, his eyes closed in contentment. Your brother was always aware of your actions before you even knew what you were going to do.

"You're annoying." You mumble.

"I'm not gonna say 'I told you so', but. . ."

You lightly punch him in the ribs but good enough to make him jolt from the abrupt action.

"Don't worry about what others think." You close your eyes to listen to his soothing words, remembering how the two of you would lay under the stars as little kids. A beautiful dream. "We're gods."

Yes. Ichor pumped through your veins. You and Homelander were able to separate your identities from Soldier Boy. He may have started the both of you with his sperm, but you'd forged your own way through blood, sweat and tears.

Incinerators.

Soldier Boy's brutality.

All of it molded you and your brother into the most powerful beings.

"We can do as we please." Homelander turns around under his covers to face toward you. Legs weave together so that you were perfectly configured to his form that latched onto you.

This was how he held you during those long, lonely nights when it was just the two of you in your small house. The nostalgic sound of the rain hitting the windowpane of his bedroom window.

He nuzzles his nose against the soft roundness of your cheek. Your perfume from earlier in the day still clinging to your skin.

This world could take whatever it wanted from him except for you. In the end Homelander plans for it to be just the two of you, the world a pile of ashes around you. Your smile would once again belong only to him. If it came to it, he'd even kill Madelyn if it meant you could remain in his arms.

If he heard a peep out of anyone about you harmlessly cuddling up to him in the middle of the night, he'd tear them apart. Destroy the tower in order to protect you. To protect this.

Did you get enough love, my little dove, why do you cry?

Homelander thinks back to that sweet little girl you once were. Clinging onto your beloved brother's leg for dear life in an attempt to not be swept up in Soldier Boy's darkness.

Such a funny thought to wrap you up in cloth, do you find it alright, my dragon?

Remembers standing next to you as Stan Edgar stood at your front door with several other Vought agents to tell you about Soldier Boy. How there was nothing left of him to even bury. Not a trace physical of him remained on the earth. Only you and Homelander as a testament. A sense of relief washing over both of you and yet. . . a knowledge of doom and the end of your childhood; if you'd ever had a proper one. No matter the mixed feelings you had toward your father, it was a strange thing to now be in a world without him.

Stan Edgar saw to the finishing of your academic studies. He eased his way as your guardian figure while Homelander fell under Madelyn's wing.

Shall we look at the moon my little loon? Why do you cry?

Nights of looking up at the night sky with your brother weren't gone. Just different. The light pollution from the city chased off any chance of seeing stars. The moon refused to be covered though and you could still gaze at it's lonesome fixture above. Your heads pressed together in the same manner you used to do as your sprawled out on a blanket atop of the roof of Vought Tower.

He damned himself for missing the days when it was just you, Homelander, and even Soldier Boy occasionally. Where your backyard bled into the wilderness. Running through the trees while Homelander tried to catch you. Soldier Boy teaching both of you how to shoot a gun, using trees and beer cans as targets. Even picking up a drunken Soldier Boy from the bar at least meant he got to spend more time with you as you accompanied him in Soldier Boy's truck.

Well you do enough talk my little hawk, why do you cry?

You still possessed a scar from your first training day with your dad. Where he gave you a concussion. There were some days where Soldier Boy's training felt more like a punishment as he used you as a punching bag. Never did you cry in front of him. Only in the privacy of the bathroom you and Homelander shared while he cleaned you up. His strong, brave girl.

Homelander brushes back a few stray strands of your dark hair away from your face. You always fell asleep fast when in his arms. You were still that little girl. You always would be to Homelander though he acknowledges you as his equal. He would always be by your side.

After all, you promised to take him to the moon with you.

Thanks for reading!

[vinelark]

please share some outtakes im on my knees

oh man most of my outtakes are like, slight paragraphs/scene rewrites, but here are some bbts lines/alternate dialogue options that didn't make the cut!

chapter 1:

But it’s not like Tim could’ve told the kidnappers to call Bruce right away, not until today’s little attempt, which was another check in the failure column. No one else knows Tim has been practically living at Wayne Manor, and if they did it might raise too many questions. Tim can’t create an unnecessary trail of connections between Bruce Wayne and a random kid, especially a random kid in a situation where superheroes and vigilantes might then show up. He knows too well how quickly those connections can snowball if someone puts together one right conclusion, like hold on, Robin just did a quadruple flip—

---

sb aww are you jealous robin excuse me sb that no one’s made @robinsass yet robin absolutely not kon i said i’m not KON. sb http://twitter.com/robinsass i got u robin i’m calling oracle sb no worries i have five backup urls robin joke’s on you anyway unlike nightwing there are no hq photos of me. also i wear a cape. why do you think i wear a cape kon sb to cover the fact that you have no ass : (

chapter 2:

“Oh, no,” Tim wheezes when he’s done hacking up half the marina. He twists to sit heavily on the wet concrete and starts scrabbling at his shoelaces. “My shoes.”

Kon rolls his eyes. That’s it. No more saving rich kids; Kon is putting a wealth cap on all future damsels in distress. “I’m sure they’ll dry.” Or he can buy a new pair—Kon had looked Tim up after the whole kidnapping thing, just to make sure he healed up okay and everything. Kid’s parents are definitely loaded.

---

“Hey—Superboy, hey, are you good at beer pong?”

“Uh,” Kon says. “For PR reasons I don’t think I should answer that.” The answer is that he has no clue, having never played, but if he said that then half the media would have a field day with how his lack of cliché teenage rebellion secretly indicated he wasn’t so human after all. If he lied and said yes, somehow that same half of the media would clutch their pearls over him being a Bad Influence.

“Oh,” Tim says. “Well. Well, I am very good at it.”

“Um. Okay.”

Tim’s face falls. Kon has no idea why he suddenly feels guilty about this.

---

"But for the record, I’m not scared of you,” Red Hood says. “All I have to do is press a button and have Batman run you out of town if you get too annoying.”

“Batman is off-world,” Kon says, a little smugly.

Hood glares through his mask in a way that tells Kon he knows that, and is annoyed that Kon does too. Good. “Then I guess that leaves me in charge.”

chapter 3:

“What are you going to get Superboy?” Steph says. “Maybe a nice cheese plate?”

“I am going to frame Dick for tax fraud,” Tim mutters. He’s taken to hiding the charcuterie board Kon made in one of his city caches now, because Dick kept sneaking it onto the dinner table every time he visited the manor.

---

“What the—” Muffled talking on the other end. “He says he’s not sure,” the girl says to someone else. “Tim, explain this to me in small words.”

“Um.” Tim rubs his temple. “I’m with Superboy. He—found me. And took me somewhere, somewhere safe, so I’m okay for now.”

It does not escape Kon’s notice that Tim doesn’t mention the part where he apparently gave his gas mask to a kid and got a full dose of fear toxin. He raises an eyebrow, but Tim is doing a great job of avoiding eye contact.

There’s a long beat. “Oh my god,” the girl says.

“Yeah.”

“Oh my god. You are so lucky I don’t have time for follow-up questions. Call me as soon as you’re home.”

(bonus chapter 4:

Kon spares a moment to be impressed that Tim has already figured out where they are, and says, “Because any good date starts with a good snack.”

Tim’s hand spasms where he’s rolling back the jacket cuffs. “A good date, huh?”)

[makerofmadness]

What's with Balloon Boy and the Daycare Attendant?

The Balloon World arcade machine exists, it's in the DA's room and both characters are involved in it. It's probably one of the most cryptic minigames in the FNAF series as a whole, but while we could ponder what exactly it's supposed to mean (maybe I'll do that for all the security breach minigames eventually), the main question I have is this:

WHY Balloon Boy specifically? Why is the minigame about HIM?

Is there a connection between the two characters? Or was it a completely random decision?

Out of nowhere, thinking about Balloon World, I came to a realization:

The Lights.

Balloon Boy's entire gimmick in FNAF 2 was that if he got into your office, he would disable your flashlight and vent lights (...somehow. I know we all make the jokes about him taking the batteries [and then that FNAF 57: Freddy In Space thing in FNAF World said he just straight-up steals your entire flashlight], but you never see the battery icon disappear or appear empty in FNAF 2 itself when he gets into your office. And the vent lights also stop working, so unless they also operate on batteries, then... does he actually take them from you?).

What's the one rule in the daycare?

Keep the lights on.

His mechanic is the antithesis to what Sun wants and exactly what Moon would want. Balloon Boy doesn't keep the lights on. He prevents you from turning them on at all.

(which also makes me kinda sad there wasn't a Glamrock version of BB. Then again, I don't know how exactly he would've uniquely affected like anything. Regardless I am hoping for the day someone in the fandom makes a glamrock bb who is arch-enemies with sun and gets along well with moon skseijdndndnd-)

It feels kinda obvious and I'm guessing I'm not the only person to think about this, but I have never seen anyone else bring this up. Not on YouTube, not on tumblr, nowhere. Maybe if I go looking for it I'll see, but i'm surprised I haven't bumped into anyone else saying this just naturally. I go into the BB tags a LOT, surely SOMEONE would've said something, right? I don't even see it noted in the trivia on the page for the arcade game on the fnaf wiki.

...but is this supposed to mean anything? Or is it just a cute little reference or callback? it's hard to say, especially with how ambiguous the minigame is.

Though I DID think of ONE thing... (possible minor spoilers for Ruin under the cut):

Saw this pointed out in a youtube video that the BB World screen (with Eclipse, who makes their proper debut in Ruin after effectively being foreshadowed by the minigame in SB's base game) can be seen on the ceiling in the DA's room. Which makes sense, obviously, but also take note of the pirate-themed windows in the hallway leading to it.

...now, which character do most of us tend to associate with Balloon Boy? His "tag-team partner," of sorts?

Foxy. The Pirate.

With this, I found that there's more Foxy-related stuff associated with the daycare area than I had previously realized because I had never made any connections before. I mean, Kids' Cove is directly linked to it for god's sake.

Like. I hope i haven't forgotten to mention anything (I've been writing this post over the course of hours 'Cus I had stuff to do in the middle of it all). My brain's kinda starting to fry. But basically: Was Foxy originally meant to be the Daycare Attendant, in-universe? Was there gonna be a Glamrock Balloon Boy with him, like as his first mate or something??? Were they gonna be connected to Fazbear Theater????? (Uh basically Sun/Moon to my knowledge from confirmation in the books and a lot of more subtle implications in-game mainly involving environmental pieces were originally meant to be in the Fazbear Theater as a stage animatronic but got moved to daycare duty instead and being reprogrammed. Which actually explains a lot about them when you think about it-)

Like. Ok I'm forgetting where I was going with this, I'm sorry, but I guess it's food for thought/adds to the weird connections between DA and BB, I guess. Idk. I can't focus that well right now to keep making new ideas.

felt like sharing my interpretation of the Balloon World minigame itself at least since earlier I did kinda finally get it down concretely:

I kinda developed a theory that Eclipse is Sun/Moon's "safe mode" and that rebooting DA reactivated Eclipse as a result. Like, they're their own AI that was at one point implemented. but then Vanny happened and locked them out thanks to the whole Glitchtrap virus thing (albeit it only seemed to reach Moon, while Sun remains seemingly unaffected. Guessing it's because they're different AIs [finally implied/basically confirmed by their Ruin dialogue). Eclipse has seemingly not been active for some time, or at least never post-pizzaplex closure, given how they're seemingly completely oblivious to the fact that this place is closed with no signs of opening.

So the minigame was foreshadowing Eclipse's existence and implying their "trapped" nature, which also could be seen as paralleling Vanessa's whole "Vanny" situation, especially given how iirc one of the messages related to princess quest can be found near the arcade machine.

[privfilth]

Yj and sb

Being best friends with a gay person never bothered Yeonjun. He never judged anyone, especially his Soobin. Even when Soobin moved in - Yeonjun never felt any sort of tension. Tonight they were at a gay bar, Soobin to find a rebound for his latest failed relationship, and Yeonjun for moral support. Soobin was painfully shy, and Yeonjun couldn’t give a fuck about approaching anyone.

Yeonjun had been questioning himself after spending more and more time around queer people. They were so inclusive, kind, and fun. He felt like he could be his true self around them. But here were certain things he still kept hidden.

He couldn’t talk about how it felt when he saw men holding hands or kissing. Even his friends, he felt like he should look away but he couldn’t help but just stare. He helped soobin find someone at the bar. Soobin’s choice was… interesting to Yeonjun. He didn’t seem like Soobin’s type.

He knew to keep an eye on Soobin and look out for their secret hand gesture they make when they need to be saved by the other and get the fuck out of there. Yeonjun didn’t mind, he always enjoyed chatting up the women at the bar, hoping to god they were bi and that he could take one of them home. He’d hate to be staying up all night waiting for Soobins guest to leave all by himself.

He got distracted when he saw the man soobin had approached move closer to Soobin to whisper in his ear. Soobin laughed and put his hand over the stranger’s. Things seemed to be going well until Soobin got up and excused himself. He headed straight for Yeonjun.

“Bathroom,” he said pushing past Yeonjun so their shoulders collided. “Sure..” going to the bathroom was a common occurrence between the two - they went everywhere together. Soobin, in a hurry, grabbed Yeonjun by his hand and dragged him into the disgusting bathroom behind him.

“Is it not going well?” Yeonjun was curious, Soobin was very inexperienced when it came to dating. His most recent relationship ended because Soobin genuinely could not satisfy his partner. He was crushed. All he wanted was to make his other half feel good- but the stage fright kept things in the bedroom very bland and brief.

“I need to get out of here-“ Soobins voice was desperate. “You’re telling me, not one bi chick- all lesbians” Yeonjun rolled his eyes thinking about how unlucky he was that night. “Make an excuse for me?” Soobin pleaded with praying hands and a pout. Yeonjun rolled his eyes again “You have absolutely no game. You know that?” He turned to leave when he felt soobins hand grab his wrist. He turned around to soobin blushing. “He wants me to go back to his place.” Yeonjun shoved him by his shoulder and chuckled “well duh, how else are you going to get over your bum ex. Try and convince him to come to ours, though. So I can keep an eye on you and make sure you’re safe. Now if only I could find someone-“

“No. I don’t want to” Soobin was assertive and threw his hands over his face. “I just want to go home. Take me home ?” Yeonjun knew exactly what Soobin needed.

They found themselves hiding while they schemed. “Alright, just go up and say you have to leave. I’ll take care of the rest.” Soobin approached his new almost love interest and formed his mouth into a straight line. He bowed his head. “I’m afraid I have to get going. Have a good night!” Soobin stood there for a good 3 seconds waiting for him to respond. “Oh cmon…” he said with a grin that had Soobins skin crawling. “That hurts my feelings. You don’t want to hurt my feelings, do you?” He brought his face closer to soobins again.

Soobin closed his eyes tight and held his breath as if he could wish himself away from this situation. Where was Yeonjun?

“Babe !!!!” Soobin heard as he felt an arm wrap around his shoulders. Yeonjun continued with over the top fake slurred speech. “I’m drunk. Take me home…” the older said with a pout. Soobin let out a fake, exaggerated gasp “sweetie ! I’m sorry I gotta go, thank you for the drink”

As they walked away the stranger spoke loud enough for the room to go almost silent “you have to be fucking kidding me! Is this your boyfriend?” Soobins first instinct was to say no, and Yeonjun knew this and knew he had to act fast. “Yes ! I sure am” the lie made Soobin smirk. Yeonjun took the opportunity to poke soobins dimple - something he hadn’t done for too long.

“You look straight as an arrow - I don’t believe you. He’s just a fucking tease” he could see right through their act and he wasn’t taking the rejection well. Yeonjun was offended. He didn’t “look” gay? What did that even mean. Without warning, Yeonjun put his arm around Soobin again. - this time he planted a kiss on his cheek. Yeonjun became very affectionate when he was intoxicated. But he couldn’t have been too drunk- this was just a part of the act. The stranger scoffed and the fake couple turned around and left hand in hand.

The train ride back to their apartment was noisey. It was pride month, and all the gays were going out every weekend to the hottest bars and clubs, drinking and hooking up. Yeonjun saw a couple standing across the way from them - holding each other tightly.

The couple were drunkenly making out. Hands exploring each others bodies. Yeonjun was no prude, but the way their bodies were moving together made him blush. One man had his hand on his partners chest- while the other reached around and was squeezing his ass. Yeonjun cleared his throat and stood up at the next stop.

When they made their way into their apartment, soobin began to complain about his ex. “I told him I was out looking for a good fuck tonight- I don’t even know what that would be like! He’s totally going to know I struck out. So much for making him jealous” Yeonjun threw his apartment key on the counter and walked to the fridge- taking out a bottle of soju. He immediately poured shots for the two of them and joined Soobin on the couch. “There’s no way he’s going to know you didn’t fuck anyone tonight. And it doesn’t matter. The not knowing is what drives them crazy” Yeonjun assured him.

They kept drinking and decided to play some video games. As they drank, their playing got sloppier and sloppier. Those two hours were spent laughing together, yelling at each other, and whoever won comforting the other. “It’s midnight” Soobin said plainly. Not because he was ready for bed, but because he just wanted to relax. And he knew just what he needed.

Soobin took the top off of the coffee table and reached in to grab a jar of flower and some rolling papers. Yeonjun watched with a smirk. No matter how drunk he was, Soobin was able to roll a joint perfectly. Yeonjun would often get more weed on the rolling tray than in the actual paper. He watched intently at the way his friends fingers pinched and rolled. When he stuck out his tongue to seal, Yeonjun felt his jaw clench. Giant hands holding the small joint, veiny and steady. And that tongue, darting out, pink and wet.

“Have you ever done anything to make someone jealous?” Soobin lit up and inhaled deeply. The smoke came pouring back out, he quickly inhaled it through his nose then let it all out with one big exhale. Yeonjun found it satisfying when he did that, he liked watching. He was always watching.

“Not intentionally, there was this girl in high school… she danced with another guy while I was in the bathroom at prom. So I fucked her best friend in my car at the after party” it was Yeonjuns turn to take a puff . On exhale he let out a dry cough. He was more of a drinker - Soobin being more of a smoker. He continued “when she saw me the next morning with a hickey- it was all over.”

“Jesus Christ, what is wrong with you?” Soobin didn’t put it past his friend to do something so selfish back in the day. “I should’ve had that dude at least give me a hickey …” Yeonjun passed the joint back with his eyebrows furrowed “what, Mr. Fruity?? No chance. And we aren’t in high school.”

Soobin inhaled and exhaled “what if you gave me one?” Yeonjun let the room go silent and played with his hands. “I don’t know, man. That’s a little-“ Soobin looked at the floor “gay?… I know you’re not gay, which is why I asked. I figured it wouldn’t be weird..” he looked up at Yeonjun through hooded lids and handed him the joint “please?…”

Yeonjun let out a heavy sigh. How could he say no. Soobin was desperate to make his ex jealous - and Yeonjun couldn’t deny that he selfishly wanted to see what it would be like. Plus, he was drunk “Fuck it”

They were facing each other on the couch and the joint was burning itself out in the ash tray. Soobin reached out for Yeonjun and Yeonjun flinched. “Sorry….” He didn’t want to seem too excited, because this was just a favor between bros. But he would have been lying if he said he wasn’t eager.

“Okay- where do you want it?” Yeonjun ghosted his fingers over the side of Soobin’s neck and studied the area. Soobin leaned his head to the side, exposing every muscle vein and tendon in his thick neck. Yeonjun swallowed hard. The alcohol was starting to make faking confidence easier. Soobin grabbed Yeonjun’s hand and placed two of his fingers over a visible area of skin “right there, I think. “ “okay… are you sure this isn’t weird?” Yeonjun wanted one last confirmation that this was okay. “No, please just get to it” Soobin closed his eyes.

Yeonjun leaned in and parted his lips. He lightly placed his lips on Soobin’s sensitive skin, taking it in between his lips and sucking. Soobin took a quick breath and clenched his fists by his sides. Yeonjun released his flesh and looked at it “not quite” he said before going back in. This got a heavy sigh out of Soobin, and Yeonjun liked the sound of it.

Soobin began to squirm and could feel blood rushing to his cock. ‘No no not now!!’ He thought. Yeonjun detached his mouth from Soobin’s neck and sat back, admiring his own handy work. His eyes met Soobin’s when he noticed them darken. Soobin inched closer bringing one of his hands into Yeonjun’s hair and pulling him in.

“More.. please..”

Yeonjun leaned in and placed a kiss to the purple mark, and kissed up a little further. He inched his way up towards Soobin’s jaw. Soobin moved his arms around Yeonjun’s neck and pulled him down so he was laying on top.

They were making out now - for what felt like forever. A mess of teeth and tongues. Soobins hips bucked up Yeonjuns, making him hiss. Yeonjuns mind was racing. He was now experiencing what he was so curious about. A man’s touch, a man’s mouth, a man’s hips. He ground down into soobins crotch with his own hardened length.

They continued like this for minutes. It kind of felt juvenile. First a hickey and now dry humping on a couch ? It felt nostalgic to Yeonjun. But he needed more more and more. Soobin undid Yeonjun’s belt buckle and began to pull down his pants. Yeonjun let him without hesitation.

Soobin didn’t bother teasing, and dove straight into Yeonjun’s briefs, wrapping his hand around his hard cock. “Fuck..” Yeonjun let his head hang down. Soobin looked at him with his big brown eyes. All innocent and beautiful. This made Yeonjun want to take care of Soobin - even tho he had absolutely no idea what he was doing.

He unbuckled Soobin’s pants and began stroking him, kissing his lips hastily. He pulled Soobin’s shirt up and kissed his chest. He took one of his nipples into his mouth and bit it, before soothing it with his tongue. Soobin sucked in air between his teeth.

Yeonjun had received head plenty of times before - he could give it, right ? Well, there’s a first time for everything. Soobin sat up when Yeonjun’s face became parallel to Soobin’s tented boxers. “You don’t have to…” Yeonjun silenced him by palming him through is underwear and pulling them down to set his cock free.

Yeonjun looked up at Soobin and planted a kiss to the head. He took the entire tip into his mouth and swirled his tongue around. Soobin’s hands found Yeonjun’s hair, pulling at it and scratching at his scalp. More was taken into his mouth when Yeonjun tasted Soobin’s sweet precum at the back of his tongue. He moaned in response - sending vibrations throughout Soobin’s body.

Yeonjun had taken the lead considering he was much more confident than Soobin when it came to sex, but him never being with a man before kind of made him the most inexperienced in the room. Soobin tapped him on his head “Yeonjun…” Yeonjun looked up and let his cock out of his mouth with a loud popping sound. His lips were swollen and formed a pout. “Let me fuck you, sweetheart..”

Yeonjun swallowed hard and couldn’t do anything but nod. Soobin sat up and lifted his shirt off his body- before removing Yeonjun’s. They stood up and each removed their pants and briefs. They stood there looking up and down at each others bodies. Yeonjun looked at soobins size and thought there was no way he could take it.

“Let me do this - I don’t think I can handle it” Soobin silenced him with a kiss. He kept their foreheads together. “Let me take care of you, Yeonjun..” one more kiss and Yeonjun melted. He never considered letting someone else take the lead, but he was a mess under Soobins touch. “Get on your back”

Soobin made his way down to Yeonjun’s length and licked it from bottom to top. It was Yeonjun’s turn to let his hands find soobins soft strands and lose his hands in them. Soobin took one of his fingers into his mouth and wet it, before pressing it to Yeonjun’s entrance. “Is this okay?” Yeonjun nodded “just go slow”

And slow he went- slowly and gently sinking his finger into Yeonjun’s tight hole. He thought about what it might feel like to be buried inside there to the hilt - and another rush of heat found its way to soobins cock. He eventually added a second finger, which sent Yeonjun reeling. He began to whimper as he became more and more submissive to soobins touch. Soobin sat up.

“Are you ready for me?” Soobin pumped his length in his hands. “I don’t know” Yeonjun choked out. Scared of the possible pain to come. Soobin got back down in between Yeonjun’s legs and stood his cock up straight. He dove his tongue into Yeonjuns sweet spot, using his tongue and lips and moisten it, and suck.

When he pulled back he saw Yeonjuns hole blooming and contracting, practically inviting him in. “God, im ready” Yeonjun said. Soobin came back up and feverishly kissed Yeonjun again. He lined his cock up to Yeonjuns entrance “let me know if you need me to stop.” He slowly inched himself in and Yeonjun sucked his entire length in. His body’s natural response to being needy, hungry.

Soobin bottomed out and began pumping slow. He leaned down and pressed open mouth kisses to Yeonjun’s neck, chest, shoulders. Yeonjun wrapped his arms around soobins neck and cried out when Soobin hit his prostate. Soobin reached down and grabbed Yeonjun’s length, pumping it.

The sound Soobin let out when Yeonjun tightened was pathetic. A small cry as he continued to try and push through. He couldn’t cum yet, not until Yeonjun was taken care of. “You feel so fucking good, baby” poured from soobins lips. He was reveling in the moment.

Yeonjun melted away at the pet name, feeling his body loosen up and become even more submissive to Soobin’s cock and hands. Soobin kept up a good pace, thrusting and pumping. “Cum for me” he demanded and Yeonjun did, hard. He let out a long whine followed by sharp pants, as his cum decorated his stomach beautifully.

Soobin didn’t let up, his thrusts become sloppier as he was reaching his end. Yeonjun began to feel a slight sting, and knew he needed to push his partner over the edge. Yeonjun dipped two of his fingers into the mess he made on himself and coated his fingers. He brought them up to his mouth and parted his lips. He dove his fingers into his mouth, making eye contact, and sucked on them until all the juices were down his throat.

Soobin was done for. Eyes squinted shut and teeth clenched together. He bottomed out one last time before pulling out. Yeonjun quickly reached down and began pumping his length for him. Soobin put his hands down to Yeonjun’s waist and kept them there as he met Yeonjun’s palm with thrusts and finally came undone.

Soobin lied down on top and let their juices get sticky and start to dry in between them. Soobin put his head into the crook of Yeonjun’s neck and hummed “that was amazing…” Yeonjun hummed back “you know what would make him really jealous ?” Soobin let out a chuckle and sat up. “Are you seriously thinking about that prick right now ?”

Yeonjun followed him up and met him face to face. He reached out and caressed soobins soft cheek with his shaking hand. “Be my boyfriend”

[zheniakirsikkalove]

Interview. Lee Dong Wook about Gong Yoo (02/2024)

"I Was Going to Retire" Lee Dong Wook Tells How Gong Yoo Helped Him During a Deep Slump.

Actor Lee Dong Wook opened up about the tough time he had when JTBC's television series 'Life' (2018), in which he played the main character, got bad reviews.

"I experienced a deep slump after working on 'Life'. It was so serious that I didn't leave my house for almost a month."

"I was unhappy with my acting in the series and the whole situation.", Lee Dong Wook recalled, "The drama was getting online hate, and all of that negativity seemed to be directed at me. I started to think I was to blame, and felt bad about it."

Lee Dong Wook then shocked the producer by saying, "Actually, I was going to retire. I never said this on air, but I seriously considered retiring and moving to another country."

"The only thing I did during that period was exercise because I started to feel like I was a useless person. I thought exercising would help me get out of the negative thoughts that had been recurring in my head.", he said, adding, "But I didn't become more muscular or anything because I drank after working out."

The actor then mentioned someone who helped him overcome his slump: actor Gong Yoo, who worked with him in tvN's drama 'Guardian: The Lonely and Great God' (2016). "He's the one who got me out of my house.", Lee Dong Wook recalled. "He just called me one day and told me to step out and join him, telling me he was already on his way to pick me up. I didn't want to see him because I thought he'd try to talk about my state. Sharing what I was going through with someone else felt pointless, as there wasn't a solution.", he said. "However, he didn't ask anything about it. We had casual conversations that day, and it got me thinking, 'This is the world I belong.'. I had been obsessed with how people online perceived me. But there was a real world outside, and that was where I belonged. I started getting out of my house after realizing it."

Source : SBS Star

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

sorry i have to brainfart this somewhere but mersault chuuya wearing almost damn near similar clothing to his youth got me thinking about dazai and chuuya's fashion choices.

dazai, in all the eras where he was in the mafia....never changes his outfit. it fitting, given his character and such.....so his ada outfit makes him look like a rainbow. dark blue vest, blue gem(?) bolo tie, striped shirt and a tan coat similar to oda's. i think it's cool, to show the stark contrast between his pm days and how he's faring now, aswell to show how much effect oda had on him.

chuuya.....is the complete opposite. boy changes his clothes all the time. but it's so interesting.

his fifteen outfit is very "him" in a sense. street kid, street kid style- red shirt, grey hoodie, green leather jacket, bright blue sheep armband. he fits right in with the rest of the sheep, and hes so...colorful here. almost similar to ada dazai's outfit. and then theres the outfit he wears in the mafia- the first one we saw back in the manga where he seems to be wearing like a..."beta" version of his current outift- but the way it was drawn (disregarding the anime for a second) it looks like its almost ill fitting for him. the vest is too big, the coat looks so heavy, the tie isnt properly tucked, and his pants are baggy. like hes struggling to "fit in".

then theres sb outfit- hes wearing the standard mafia outfit like higuchi, but with his own touches- rolled up sleeves, glasses tucked in his breastpocket, choker, gloves. its not much, but even higuchi doesnt do anything to hers. we kinda see him "getting into" the mafia work, and theres no pop of color here. the dragon head conflict outift is different though- hes wearing clothes that are "his style" again. simple shirt, jacket, choker, gloves. he also has his red petticoat (i think thats what it is? whatever that long cloth underneath his jacket) that, once again, gives him some color. i dunno what spured the outfit change, but i honestly think the red color is his own touch- his own "color"

and then current chuuya. no color at all, maybe safe from the ribbon on his hat. he wears his coat on his shoulders, similar to pm dazai. (also, slight off tangent here- he always loses his coat whenever hes dealing with dazai?? i think?? which is. interesting. given with how glued pm dazai's coat is to his own shoulders. like he actively takes it off/gets it taken off and i SWEAR this only even happens when hes with dazai. idk. ever since asagiri said beast dazai wearing his coat fully to signify him accepting his role as the pm boss ive been. thinking about it. a lot.)

where was i going with this?? oh yeah. why is mersault chuuya wearing his old clothes?? specifically fifteen clothes? like was it his off day or something. bc if you look at chuuyas various outfit as his progression towards the mafia then him wearing his old non mafia clothes either means two things : 1. this is to signify chuuya, under vampire influnce, is well. obviously not loyal to the mafia atm. or 2. something might happen in the future that makes him swear allegiance to someone else which i dont find possible but??? who knows. im overthinking this

Oh my god I opened my asks to find this monster in here and scrolled through it like ?????????

Please feel free to do this anytime this was an absolute joy to read hahaha

"dazai, in all the eras where he was in the mafia....never changes his outfit." His outfit stays pretty similar, you're right, though he does actually change it once during his mafia days. The left image is the outfit he wears in Fifteen and Stormbringer, while the right is what he wears in DHC and Dark Era.

The difference is the blazer jacket he adds under his coat. It's a minimal change but I think it's significant. I mentioned in this post how I believe the change might be related to his change in pronoun from boku to watashi, but really it's more the added layer of distance that makes this significant. Dazai just looks a little... odd, in the first outfit. The coat hangs off him loosely, his shirt is a little baggy. He looks very boyish, and that makes his deceptive tendencies and deeply concerning outlook all the more disturbing to others.

The second outfit makes one change but his clothes now look like they fit him (still with the exception of the coat, which never fit and never will... in this universe anyways. You mentioned Beast so... you know already hehe). In the case of the second outfit, he looks more mature and formal, which lends itself to a person who withdrew further and further away from people (with the exception of the other two at Bar Lupin); who became a terrifying executive in other's eyes, moving away from the "creepy intelligent child" image he had earlier - even though he is still very much a kid. No one knows Dazai - I think the added image of formality and authority here is just one of the many barriers he constructed to keep people from getting too close.

"so his ada outfit makes him look like a rainbow. dark blue vest, blue gem(?) bolo tie, striped shirt and a tan coat similar to oda's."

hjdfvbdjf rainbow - entering his no longer closeted gay era (sorry lol i couldn't resist)

No but you're right about the coat looking a bit like Oda's. He cared for and respected that man like no other and I think when Dazai thinks of "a good person" Oda is the first person who comes to mind. His shirt in the manga is also stripy like Oda's, a little detail that got lost in the anime. :')

"his fifteen outfit is very "him" in a sense. street kid, street kid style- red shirt, grey hoodie, green leather jacket, bright blue sheep armband. he fits right in with the rest of the sheep, and hes so...colorful here."

Yeah. He looks every bit the street kid and blends with the Sheep near perfectly - more than fitting in though, I think it's more than implied that he wants to fit in and changes his look to do so. Chuuya goes to great lengths to give the appearance of fitting in - because he never felt like he truly did (and certainly the Sheep did not treat him like an equal or a friend).

"and then theres the outfit he wears in the mafia- the first one we saw back in the manga where he seems to be wearing like a..."beta" version of his current outfit- but the way it was drawn (disregarding the anime for a second) it looks like its almost ill fitting for him. the vest is too big, the coat looks so heavy, the tie isnt properly tucked, and his pants are baggy. like hes struggling to "fit in"."

YES you get it!! And adding onto that, Chuuya doesn't really have a lot of reason to want to fit in yet. He hasn't found his personal groove yet, because he has little personal attachment to the mafia at this point in time.

Yeah in Stormbringer he's got a few personal touches but is still pretty non-descript (though you're right, it's much more than Higuchi... something to think about for her character too, and how it seems the mafia may be more of a job than an investment to her). By Dead Apple though, Chuuya's outfit is... well, back to his punk vibes, just a little more mafia-classy, I guess. (I don't know fashion I'm sorry, please don't kill me)

"but i honestly think the red color is his own touch- his own "color""

Red makes a lot of sense as a colour for Chuuya. It's energetic, emotional, fierce and aggressive. It's also considered protective, so yeah it suits him for sure. Red clothes, red ability... red camellias...

"and then current chuuya. no color at all, maybe safe from the ribbon on his hat." Ooo ok. So in the anime, this is true but in the manga, I believe his vest is actually a pale red.

Well. Brown with red undertones. Your point still stands though because the colour is very muted. It's not like Fifteen or DHC Chuuya for sure.

"(also, slight off tangent here- he always loses his coat whenever hes dealing with dazai?? i think?? which is. interesting. given with how glued pm dazai's coat is to his own shoulders. like he actively takes it off/gets it taken off and i SWEAR this only even happens when hes with dazai. idk. ever since asagiri said beast dazai wearing his coat fully to signify him accepting his role as the pm boss ive been. thinking about it. a lot.)"

Oh. Thinking on this. Um. Embarrassed to say - I don't think I noticed that actually. Like obviously he loses the coat a lot and that was already something to think on but... only around Dazai, is that right? Hold on, I'm gonna check.

Ok so my check wasn't super thorough (read: I am too tired and drained to go through each and every panel he appears in) but...

By god, I think you're right.

That's. Hm. I'm going to join you on thinking about that for awhile.

I see the coat as a representation of his role and responsibility he takes on, really, so it's interesting that the formality and symbolism of his service to the mafia gets quite literally discarded in the scenes with his foil and equal. Fascinating.

He's also not wearing it in any of these now infamous panels from Chapter 101:

Huh. Well. Thank you anon. You've just given me a whole new thing to whir about.

"why is mersault chuuya wearing his old clothes?? specifically fifteen clothes?"

Honestly, I'm still waiting to figure this out too.

Because of the purplish hue over this piece of new art, I find it hard to tell what the actual colours of his outfit are but it does look awfully similar to his Fifteen outfit. It could just be his "day-off" outfit but I think there's got to be more to it than that. It could have to do with allegiance, like you suggested. May I also suggest the return to a sense of inhumanity?

These are also the clothes he wore when his journey to find answers on himself began. Might he be entering a new arc where he has to "find" himself again?

I still feel we don't have enough information to make a solid judgement. As the meursault pov continues, I think we'll have a better reason as to why he's dressed like this.

[reverieaa]

Hi! I'm the same anon as last one who read your 'Change of clothes' (can I be your anon? i'll take any emoji)

So I had a spiritual epiphany which was sparked this morning after going through my notes of states posts (yours as well as @neobora and @remcycl333) and I wanted to share. I think the non-duality concepts finally tied in for me.

This is my epiphany:

I think the true purpose of manifesting as humans is to realise our true selves as infinite beings. To remember & reclaim our limitless power and transcend from the limitations and illusions of the material world we were born into. When you truly understand the law and can practice it well, you are no longer a slave to the material world and its rules. You are unshakeable because you know you are far greater than this temporary shadow. You realised the truth that your reality is whatever you choose it to be, through your awareness. And the process of coming to this realisation, of reclaiming our power, is the awakening & liberation itself. The desire for material things was only the carrot on the stick that led us to learn to manifest, to exercise our power, never the true end goal. The true reward is knowing we are God. We always were and always will be but we needed to remember. And this is how.

Thank you again for your lovely posts. I never thought I'd finally 'get' states but I think I do now. I now read loa posts out of interest & as a reminder of my own power, no longer looking for *the* thing that's finally going to get me what I want. It's always only ever been within me. I can't look outside to fulfill it.

Funny thing is I actually manifested through states a year ago with a few things I didn't care about. I was like 'oh I'll give what I read a try" without any expectations and I realise now I executed it perfectly. The reason I overconsumed, spiralled and couldn't persist when it came to "big" desires is because I was still identifying with the outer man in the material world which falsely believed that it had to work hard to get "big" things it wanted (hence thinking I had to constantly be thinking or doing something about it like doing methods & routines to have it); I hadn't actually realised my true self and true power and identified with it.

Now I know it's accepting that state of being within you, identifying with your inner self (the infinite being) and dismissing the shadow that the 3D is. I also want to credit/give a shoutout to this reddit user Own_Ad7567 who is a shifter as they contributed to my eventual epiphany. I realised shifting is the same essence of what is talked about here, it was very fresh, interesting & eye opening to read about the law framed in yet another way. Their post 'For those who struggle with doubts and focus problems' in particular is really good but all their posts were fun to read! They said:

"Understand that your 3d, or physical reality (basically what you perceive around you) is the least real part of reality. It is just a projection of the 4d. Like a cinema: what happens on the screen is just a projection. If you want to change what's being projected on the screen, dont focus on changing the screen, change the film and the screen is quickly going to be showing something different

I know on loablr the most used analogy was the mirror & face but it never really clicked for me until I read that! And then afterwards I read @neobora's 'Through a different lens' post & it just solidified my understanding.

Wow I'm amazed at how long this post is. Maybe it will help someone else too. Thank you again for your writing all those posts and answering all the asks. I still haven't read most of it but that's just how impactful your posts are. I gained a lot of clarity just from reading a few. I am truly grateful to you, @neobora, @remcycl333, Own_Ad7567 and everyone who shares their understanding of the law. Thank you guys!

You are absolutely amazing, anon! Thank you for your kind and sweet words, and your wisdom. I hope this helps sb put there too and I'm certain that it will. I'm seeing it more and more everyday in this community, despite us having upset and downs. I'm proud that you've finally reached peace in your journey like this, and I'm honored that you let me be part of it, along with the other bloggers

You can be my anon is you wish, I'm not very active here but would it be ok for now if you went by an initial or nickname?

[i43tv]

helloooww

im typing this before our schools play (IG against all odds i wa sstill abel to particpate in this MF perf9rmance lol) cuz i finally got some time 2 myslrf ,,,,

so....... hectic weekend ,, i guess

im trying 2 type everyhting i rememebrr ebcausea lot of it is a blur and im afraid ill forget mroe of what happened

i only remmeber snapshots really

,,,, sorryn4 all the tyypos

fridya was when i planened 2 run awau from my parents house ,, i wannted 2 communte 2 my grandparents house in another city .. i brought enkugj money with me 2 do so n i made sure to wear my uniform thwt day so i can get a students discount on the buses i rode

i had a rehearsal onf ridau that ended in theevnein g n afterwards i went 2 theat cafe where i boigjt the overpriced ocffee lol

t the time i culd still hear my alters speak 2 me but as the night went on i clld hear them less and less n my head hurt so so bad like my brain was made of.lead and

nd the scariest parr of it was i think i stsrted to feel less likemyself

and more like i was doing actions detemrined by someone else

whenever i felt scared about goingto my grandparents house thsts so far awya all on my onw especially at nighttime

its likethe fear was automatically stamped our n shoced away

and replaced with kust . cold deadset determinaton

but r

but that wasnt me

thst easnt me at all

everytjing was snquiet inside my head n so was my surroundings

like mentalyi was dronwing in an ofean where i was alone n i couldnt hear anything whstsoeber

im very hyperssnesitive to noisebut for ocne everutjinf was quietand the silence scared me

,,,,, god i wasnt even entirely sure where i was oging

bur i gues sosmehow whatever was contorlling me then knew

i jsut kept ging and i kept going n i rode the buses and public vehicles inneede dtonreide

i nevr reached my grandparents house

i was walkign to the next stop n i wasnt payng attention to the eoad and i neaely got eun ove rby a car

i think thwt was enougj to mae me snap out of it somehow

i wudlve cried rogjt tjere if i wasnt in themiddle of the road ajd in public

god i wanted to cry so badly

i tirned sorund and went back gomeand it wa shard to catch a ride home but iw as able to find a bus n i went bakc n whiel i was a tht ebus i texted 1 of my irls asking if i ckuld dtay foe the nigh and thank godshe said yes

i couldnt tell ehr sbout thewhole situation but i tpld her i was having a hard night n i also told her ill stay untl monday too

and sb elet me

and i cried for the firs totmethst nignt in the bathrorom st her hksue

i took a short shower and changed into clean cloth3s n got blanekts and their little foam mattress n i stayed incher room playong vdeo games n talking n i cried a bit n she let me cry

n on sautday snd sundya i gont remmebr what hapepne drhen

but i woke up this morning n i think i can handle doing te fpromance so im herennow

i plan tk try again

running away from my parents house

mentlaly i keep xalling ot running qway from home but its not reallym hkme is it

it shouldnt be anyones home

i dont mind if i have to miss acouple week sof shcool

th3 year is almsot ending anwyay

i never cared wbour school it can go burn

things will beokay when i reach my grandparents house i know it

[acidxinxwonderland]

RUIN DLC SPOILERS! and Freddy simpery

It was good, I mean god, they really knocked it out of the park but I am honestly at a complete loss for words. The ending isn’t really sitting with me well, I mean, they will have to do another game to continue with the story right? Since Roxy calls out for Cassie after the credits. 

I want to believe Gregory didn’t just kill Cassie off, I mean, how could he cause the elevator to fall in the first place? If he didn’t though, that would also mean that they literally just had his voice mimicked TWICE and I don’t know if they’d really go that direction writing wise. It just doesn’t make any sense, why help Cassie get away from the mimic only to just kill her? 

I think a lot of people aren’t taking into consideration that the headless Freddy in ruin has the word ‘prototype’ on his foot. That isn’t the real Freddy, the real Freddy is with Gregory, so that was nice to know that he wasn’t just a head. (MAYBE! Who knows, maybe Feddy was already a prototype!) 

I thought the Freddy and Bonnie stuff was meegaaa cute too! You can either take it as a relationship or a friendship, either way I’m excited for the Fronnie fanart to come! 

Now, onto the simpery. 

WHY, why couldn’t they have just given me ONE voice line from him ajodjasdnjasdjna aaaagh!!! That would have been enough for me ;o; but if Gregory seriously just straight up killed Cassie then that means we’re probably never going to see him again if there is something else that comes out. It breaks my lil ol heart... My boy, my sweet sweet bear boy. I love him so much, I wish I had more crumbs like the greedy bitch I am.

Other than that, I really enjoyed it, the puzzles were fun and easy enough for my tiny lil brain, I loved Roxy turning ‘good’, her little dialogue with Cassie before she was shut off made me tear up. The horror was a LOT better compared to SB, but for someone who does NOT handle horror games well at all, I handled this one perfectly fine. Nearing the end I wasn’t scared anymore, just excited for what was going to happen next.

This doesn’t fix SB, it never will, but it was a solid DLC that shows the true potential of Steel Wool. I’m glad I played it myself, it was the worth the experience. 

[artzychic27]

Just a bunch of out of context SB&IB quotes

Marinette: Quick question. Has Luka shown you their pirate booty yet?

Adrien: *Giggles; blushes* … No!

—

Luka: Now to find us a taxi like a man!… *Pokes out his leg* Yoohoo~! *Several taxis stop by them*

—

Austin A: Trust me, I don't need a weapon to get respect. *lays his bat down on the table*

Austin T: What’s up, you short ass motherfu- *Austin A picks up his bat* Handsome, strong- *Austin A puts his bat down* Stupid, dumbass- *Austin A picks up his bat* All around nice guy.

Austin A: … Okay, maybe you have a point.

—

Mr. Monlataing: *Hits Mr. Damocles over the head with a lunch tray, knocking him out* I'm sorry, Mr. Damocles, but you were acting like such a jerk that even a granola-crunching pacifist like me had to do something about it.

Mr. Damocles: Fair enough.

—

Mr. Damocles: Well! What brings you ladies to this perfectly legitimate school?!

Alyssa: Why… Our precious son, Marcquelle, of course.

Marc: I said, ‘Call me Marc!’

Mr. Damocles: Oh. So you two are-

Marc: My cool lesbian moms. *High fives them as they fist bump each other, then poses* Aw, yeah!

Mr. Damocles: Oh, thank God! You’re just gay!

—

Adrien: Oh no! My leftover Chinese food! It's gone!

Nino: *Eating Chinese food* Dude, if I'd have known, I never would have-

Adrien: And look at that. Someone drew a mustache on my favorite headshot! Don't you people understand!? There's only one explanation! It's the ghost!

Nino: Yeah, uh, a ghost ate your Chinese food. *hides the Chinese food*

Nathaniel: *hides a marker* And drew a mustache on your headshot.

Ivan: And uh, got high on allergy pills and made out with your toothbrush ... Uh, I mean uh, what ghost?

—

Cosette: Austin Armbruster is Monarch! I'll prove it!

Marc: How?

Cosette: Through science! *pulls out a crossbow* If I shoot him in the face and he lives, he’s Monarch.

—

Austin Q: *After Austin T gives him mouth to mouth* What are you doing?!

Austin T: I was saving your life.

Austin Q: Next time let me die!

—

Lacey: Lila! What’s going on with you and Nathaniel?

Lila: Me and Nath? I-

Jean: Lila, honey, it’s obvious Nathan hates your guts. We just wanna know why, you sweet, beautiful gorgeous queen.

Lacey: *Pulls Jean aside* What the hell are you doing?

Jean: I thought we’d play a little “bad cop, fab cop!” *Puts on a boa*

Lacey: I love it!

[fireemblems24]

Scarlet Blaze Ch 10

I don't remember if there's 13, 14, or 15 chapters per route in this game, but here we go with SB Ch 10.

STORY

I keep remembering Ingrid is dead 😭 And we forced Shamir to join us by threatening Catherine 😭

Oh, boy, Claude just became Edelgard's bitch boy. Can't say I didn't suspect this.

Why, though? Edelgard just said in her support with Balthus she intends to conquer all of Fodlan. Does she see Claude as the least threatening? I'd like to know why Claude thinks it's a good idea too.

So I take it this time Claude is getting shoe-horned into Edelgard's story rather than Byleth's? I wonder if we'll see this in AG and GW too. Or if it'll be a bit different.

I'm having Shez be such an ass. He turned down sparing with Holst and made things awkward.

Is Claude still king in this route?

"We'll be invading Fraldarius" no 😭😭.

Edelgard just called it an "invasion" too. So at least she's honest.

I love how Hubert is spinning Dimitri wiping out the Western lords as some evil thing. But, like, those people organized a genocide.

DOROTHEA, my beloved!!! THANK GOD.

Claude, Edelgard, Linhardt and just about everyone else is bemoaning all the people who are going to die in the war. for daring to . . . defend their lives But my girl Dorothea is the only one who seems to realize that her side is the cause of the bloodshed. Not the people who would never have to fight if Edelgard didn't force them too.

"Whatever our intent, we're the instigators here. We can't expect the enemy to do anything less than defend their land with tooth and claw." Dorothea is queen. A hypocrite, but at least the game realizes who's really at fault.

"When people think someone is after what the possess, they respond with fear - even if the thought is all in their head." - Ferdinand. Except, it's not?

Edelgard openly wants to rule their lands with absolute authority. She's already stolen everything from one of her enemies, why should the Kingdom believe they wouldn't get the same treatment Rhea did? I wish the game would make it clear what Edelgard would do to Dimitri and co if they did surrender. Because, like, does anyone really think Hubert would leave them alive? Or Edelgard for that matter? If she wants to rule the Kingdom, Dimitri and most of the Blue Lions would HAVE to die. Wouldn't she throw Dimitri and his supporters out of their homes and replace them with Empire nobility at best? It's not in their heads.

Hey, at least this is the first interesting thing that's happened in SB since the prologue lamo. I hope it's not just back to CF now except Claude is now Edelgard's toady.

CASPAR & FERDINAND A SUPPORT

Ok guys, for anyone who's curious, this is where I picked up after finishing FE Engage. Feels a lot less daunting knowing I'm already a good numbers of ch into every route.

Weird support. Ferdinand is getting respected and admired by a Black Eagle instead of being the butt monkey. Caspar is thinking and questioning having something in his life other than furthering his reputation via killing people. I like it.

Ferdie called himself a master of none and admired Caspar back.

LINHARDT & DOROTHEA A SUPPORT

Wasn't this B support the one where we learned Edelgard had a single sole supply line? Lamo.

Dorothea's not going to keep taking notes for Linhardt lol.

She got hurt, so Linhardt took notes for her. She's surprised, but pleased.

She told him he had his own charm, and he's like "please, no." I love him.

I don't think this support really showed a new side to the characters, though. It felt like an emptier version of their OG one.

SHEZ & EDELGARD B SUPPORT

Shez wants her to trust him. She says she does now.

He feels purposeless and wants to be her bodyguard.

Lamo, one of Shez's response options is "stand there slack-jawed." I forgot how much I liked Shez.

He wants to defend Edelgard because her promoting him changed his life.

HUBERT & HAPI A SUPPORT

Hapi is trying to make nice with Hubert.

They're bonding over coffee.

Now they're having coffee and talking about it. I'm more of a tea person, tbh.

Sorry, but this was boring af. Never thought I'd say that about a Hubert support.

CAMP + SIDE BATTLES

Dimitri took Cornelia down in this route too. Badass.

Ashe is so miserable, poor dude. Mercie isn't happy either.

I honestly really don't like CF!Caspar, but SB!Caspar seems even worse, like he's just his dad's little killing-happy puppet.

Randolph is still a little shit. He WANTS to invade the Alliance. IDK, I just cannot fathom wanting something like that of any country let alone an ally.

Lamo, Edelgard literally just said might makes right.

Shit, I just remembered that Ingrid's dead in this timeline.

Hilda legit just asked Claude why he's made a strategy that limits casualties. Are people from Faerghus the only ones who don't love killing people? She is doubting the Empire at least. She really doesn't like Edelgard, lol.

Not seeing Ingrid with the others hurts. They're really out here just trying to stop everyone else from trying to murder them.

See this is why Dimitri's the best one - "The old ways must die - with that I agree. But shove that down the people's throats, and you risk breaking the very land you're trying to rule." If Edelgard had her way, there'd be nothing left to rule except the Empire.

Yeah, the reason you can't work with the Empire, Dimitri, is that Edelgard wants to rule all of Fodlan. Her alliance with Claude has made it really clear that the Empire still intends a hostile take over of even their own allies. Which, honestly, I do appreciate SB for being a bit more honest than CF.

I really don't want to fight Rodrigue. I do think it's funny that your enemy always hires Jeralt though.

I'm guessing Jeralt gives Byleth his sword in every route.

SHEZ & BERNADETTA B SUPPORT

Starts with her screaming and shrieking about something.

Anna showed up! She's selling something to Bernadetta that will help her with her shyness. Also sells her something shifty. Or tries. Because Bernadetta assumes Anna's up to no good (probably true) and buys nothing.

Shez calls her judgmental lol. He's not wrong.

BERNADETTA & FERDINAND C SUPPORT

This is their only support. Kinda weird given their past history.

She's eating plants. Ferdinand is concerned she's eating bad stuff. Ferdinand wants to have a competition over who collects the most edible plants.

Poor Bernie. His "competition" really reminded me of those guys who are like "oh, prove it, name xxx!" when I say I like this sport or that fandom because I must be lying to impress them or some shit. (except I don't think Ferdie is being sexist here, just annoying af).

Bernie gets hurt and one of Ferdie's plants can help fix it.

Also, he lost.

EDELGARD & MONICA B SUPPORT

I can't imagine this is going to be anything but nauseating.

Haha, Edelgard just said in another world they may have lost Monica forever (to TWSITD).

Edelgard says she only saved Monica because it was the best move lol. And like, we know this is actually true because, well . . .

Ohhh, wow, they really went there. Edelgard tells Monica to her face that she only rescued Monica because it suited her, didn't plan on it, and would let Monica die if it helped her goals.

I know a lot of times people play off Edelgard's harshness as "oh, she's just insecure and saying that!" But here you can't really make that argument because it happens in Houses lamo.

She literally didn't rescue Monica because she needed TWSITD soldiers.

Learning this changes exactly nothing about Monica.

It added some stuff to Edelgard, but Monica is still horribly one-note.

FERDINAND & DOROTHEA B SUPPORT

I know a lot of people like their Houses support chain, but I kinda don't? It's drama over something really silly.

Edelgard is here. Ugh. I want Dorothea, not her.

Oh, good grief, it's going to be about the same annoying thing. Ferdinand is remembering seeing Dorothea and being stunned by her beauty.

(like, imagine getting pissed off that someone stares at you when you're butt-ass naked in public and dripping wet)

Dorothea's a lot more reasonable this time, getting flustered hearing this.

MAIN BATTLE

Every time I log back into this, I remember that Ingrid's dead :(

Oh, God, please tell me that I'm not killing Rodrigue and Felix now.

They go from "oh, bummer, we have to kill people to! Let's go Empire!!!" Bit of a whiplash, but Dorothea's the only one who seems to realize they're killing people and not NPCs lamo.

Same conversation between Shez and Arval. Guessing I'll get it in AG when it's time for recruiting Byleth too.

Ok, like with Golden Wildfire, I'll try to unlock Byleth. But unlike with GW where I reset and tried a few times, I'm only trying once. Because I really want to finish this and get to other games. AG is the only route where I'll put in real effort to get Byleth because I care more about those characters getting a fully happy ending than the rest.

I think I failed again lol. It changed from a side goal to the main goal to fight Byleth. I didn't move around the map fast enough.

God, I love Rodrigue.

Rodrigue died. I'm guessing if I recruit Byleth, that doesn't change? How many other Blue Lions does SB force me to kill?

Cut scene time. So who dies in SB?

LAMO, it's Randolph. OFC it's Randolph. This guy is just allergic to surviving.

Is it bad I'm more upset that Rodrigue died? He's a WAYYYYY better person than Randolph.

In case you didn't read my GW reaction, I was quite pleased to see Byleth actually pissed about someone almost hurt their dad given how little they ask Edelgard about her involvement in that in CF.

I like how they expect us to care about Randolph. Like, Judith, makes sense. She's close to Claude. She's cool. Randolph is really unlikable and has no special connection to anyone except Fleche.

Does this mean Fleche will cause a level where she goes crazy against Byleth?

This conversation falls so flat compared to the GW one. Because in GW, you were talking to Claude. Here, it's . . . Fleche. In GW it was actually an emotional moment (and made me feel a bit guilty). Here, not so much.

I do feel bad for Byleth and Alois though.

Ok, the Sothis-Byleth merging happening.

I love how they go from celebrating the deaths of Faerghus to lamenting their own loses, without any acknowledgment that THEY are responsible for all of this or that the people they killed were just as "alive" as they are.

Haha, even SB lets you recognize that Randolph means very little personally to you or any of the main cast.

xxxxx

[cofeeban]

Coffee

Although I think I can say I don't enjoy coffee now, in my younger and more impressionable years I had seen people drinking coffee all the time. The drinks were so involved and complicated that it seemed like a personality trait for people. A personality trait I didn't have. Really, I think the only reason I wanted coffee because it seemed like a circle I wasn't in, but wanted to be a part of.

The first time I had coffee was in winter 2017 - I know I'll write about a different time period one day - after either a late class or a final and my dark, chilly walk home involved walking past a Starbucks. I never had a coffee before and the shop looked empty, so I decided today was the day I would fill the coffee shaped hole in my heart. I went inside and tried to peruse the menu but found that although it was in English, I couldn't understand and could barely read the scripture of coffee. Why wasn't there anything called coffee on the menu? What's a Frappuccino, Americano, latte or cappuccino?

My brain was struggling and if I walked away then, it wouldn't have been the first time I abandoned my dreams of a caffeine addicted future, but I had already decided that I was changing my life in that Starbucks no matter what. It was nearly empty save for a couple of other students who already spoke the word God and was repaid with coffee in kind. Considering that, I did what I thought I could never do: ask someone for help. Namely the barista.

I approached the register and asked something along the lines of:

"I want something with caffeine but I've never had coffee before, can you help me order something?"

I fully expected to be made fun of or to be told exactly what to order just to get rid of me. The barista however, snatched all my expectations hurled them out the window, the planet, the galaxy and the observable universe and began to ask me questions on what sort of flavors I preferred. Never in my life did I expect such kindness from a stranger. It may not have even been kindness, but his training on what to do for folks as clueless as I was. Either way I was elated, he was helping me realize my dream of getting coffee, and with his help I was going to get something I might even like.

We ultimately settled on the White Chocolate Mocha and I got a 12oz cup. I don't know what the size is called in SB lingo and I respect the business less than lice and bedbugs so I won't even look it up. I will, however, say that on my walk home I felt so happy. The cup was keeping my glove-less fingers warm and knocking something off my bucket list was keeping my heart warm. Not only that but I actually enjoyed the drink and to this day I'm still nostalgic for that drink. Granted in retrospect, it's pretty much just sugar in a cup, but still, I felt included in a culture that was beyond me. If people were getting coffee I had something I could say I wanted.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Don't go to Starbucks they hate their workers. Support local business instead.

[lezzballer]

Any update to your LJ story?

Do you have any fic recs involving any combination of LJ/DT/SB/PT that you've read? I'm trying to find things but get very few results since most of it's on livejournal and a lot of pages have been purged.

I have more Lauren in my notes app!

My Lauren/reader fic is actually just a Lauren/Diana fic with the reader in Diana's shoes. I know the player/reader format is more popular than player/player. So that's why I wrote it that way.

I haven't found anyone else that writes LJ/DT, DT/PT, DT/SB, or any other combination. But I do LOVE to think about every single combination of those four!

Writing is hard and I write slowly. I haven't figured out an ending for the Lauren Jackson meet cute story. But here's what I have in my notes app right now! Unedited and unfinished with no conclusion. I haven't touched this in weeks! I barely remember what I wrote here. But I'm sharing it with you because I love you for sending me asks!!!

You pick up your pace and hoof it back to campus. It's dangerously cold but you know you can make it to the gym before the cold defeats you. You've done it hundreds of times before.

...there's only one place in the world where you belong. The gym...

You take a shortcut through the woods. It's an old stoner trail that leads to the service road behind the gym. Cold slimy branches tug at your clothes and skin and hair. But all your attention is laser focused on the gnarled roots on the path ahead of you. If you sprain your ankle in the woods right before the conference tournament, Coach Auriemma will kill you.

The woods thin out and you can see the gym through the gaps between the trees. There's light pouring out from the gym windows. The janitor must still be closing up.

A branch gives your hair one last tug as you step out of the woods and onto the service road. You can't wait to get inside that gym. The thought of the ball going through the net makes your pulse quicken. You're like a junkie desperate for a fix. You pull your gym key out and unlock the back door with your shaking quivering hands. As you step into the building, the familiar sights and smells of the hallway make you feel human again. And then the sound hits you. Dribble dribble swish. There's someone in the gym already. You hurry down the hallway and peer through the glass windows on the gym doors.

Lauren Jackson is alone in your gym drilling threes. Swish, swish, swish. You stand there in awe watching her. You've never seen a post player hit threes in your life. In that moment, you realize she's the greatest player in the world.

You push open the gym doors. Lauren turns to face you. She's grinning from ear to ear.

"I thought you might need a rebounder" you say as she walks towards you.

"I do need a rebounder" she's standing in front of you now. You're tall enough to be a D1 basketball star. But Lauren absolutely towers over you. She's simply massive. And she seems a lot bigger in this gym where height matters.

She steps close to you and moves her hand towards your face. In that moment, you feel absolutely out of control. God, family, team, media, society, none of it matters to you right now. You'd throw it all away just to feel Lauren's hand on your face.

Her hand moves past your face and pulls a huge twig out of your tangled hair. She then finds a second and third twig in there and frees them from the mess on your head.

"Do you need a hair tie?" She asks. You say yes even though you have several hair ties in your jacket pocket.

She pulls a green hair tye out of her chaotic pony bun and hands it to you. The pony bun changes shape but it doesn't lose its structural integrity. She must have about 10 other hair ties in there. You tie your hair back with her green hair tie and look down at her shoes. She's wearing the same Jordans she had on at the house party but they're absolutely spotless. They look like they're fresh out of the box. And you're wearing a pair of nasty old hiking shoes.

"Let me get my shoes" you say. You dash over to the locker room, retrieve your gym shoes, and return to the court. As you're lacing up, you remember there's supposed to be some semblance of security around here. "So Lauren, how'd you get in here?" you ask.

"I stole Sue's key." That's probably a security breach of some kind.

"You know, I think you two might be the most dysfunctional teammates I've ever seen."

"Really?" Lauren laughs. "I've seen worse."

"Sue told me I'm supposed to help fix your problems."

"Well, good luck with that." She passes you the ball.

You dribble casually out on the perimeter. "So tell me. Why do you hate UConn?"

"I don't hate UConn." Lauren says, shifting her feet to keep her body between you and the basket. "I'm doing charity work for you, aren't I? I'm teaching the humble people of Connecticut about basketball."

"I think we already know a few things about basketball." You fake a pull up, drawing Lauren out to the perimeter. Then you take a huge first step and drive hard to the rim. But Lauren stays with you. Your feet are just barely ahead of hers. Her torso pushes down on your shoulder. No problem. You can finish through contact. But every step feels 100x heavier than the last. She's trying to grind you down into the court. You plant your final step and launch towards the finish. Lauren blocks your shit so hard it feels like she's ripping your shoulder clean off. She twists her hips and hits you with her body while you're still airborne. You go flying into the back wall. The tattered old padding on the wall barely softens the blow.

"You know a few things" she smirks as she stands over your crumpled body.

"I know that's a foul"

"Not in the WNBA. Not in FIBA. Not in Australia." She reaches down and pulls you up off the floor.

Well, two can play at that game. You get in a defensive stance in front of Lauren and prepare yourself to do some damage. As she steps into the paint, you launch your entire body into her. You grab her and hold her and try to pin her arms down. You foul her in every way. She still manages to get a shot up but the shot rattles off the rim.

"That's not basketball, that's rugby!" Lauren says as she pushes you off of her. She says it with a laugh but you can see a mean fire flash in her eyes.

You take the ball out to the perimeter and turn to face Lauren once again. You start your drive with another huge step. And Lauren is on you like glue, running with you. But this time you stop on a dime, step back, and hit a fadeaway midrange jumper. You make eye contact with her as the ball swishes cleanly through the net. She looks at you like she wants to kill you. It's intoxicating.

You and Lauren play a few more rounds of one-on-one but you can't get another clean shot off on her. The gap between you is more than just height. Right now, she's simply better than you. You're around the same age. But she's been playing pro since she was 16 and you've never touched a pro basketball. You start to think maybe she does have something to teach Connecticut.

You pause the one-on-one game to catch your breath. Lauren's face is slightly flushed. You can feel her eyes on you, challenging you, daring you to get beaten again. "Do you still need a rebounder?" You ask.

"Always," she replies. And just like that, the killer inside her eases back into her subconscious. The tension drops.

There's something so soothing and meditative about shooting practice. The rhythm of the ball, the focus of the shooter, the encouragement of the rebounder. Time slips away from you as you and Lauren take turns shooting.

[hermywolf]

No bc your post about season 3’s writing is so true. I kinda hope in s4 we see Hughie and Annie at least like… actively communicate and work through some of their issues in a healthy(ish) way? Because they kinda just brushed it under the rug and everyone seemed to forgive him for the murder spree at the end of the season because he “did the right thing in the end”

its just. it seems like communication is only necessary when the plot wants to use it to pit them against each other. and since this season they wanted to frame hughie as being in the wrong he has to communicate or it's a betrayal, but annie doesn't, and it's never adressed

i love them so much and want them to be healthy and happy but the writers have GOT to stop with this whole double standard thing they started this season in which hughie is in the wrong for everything but annie and kimiko aren't for doing the exact same things. just. let my boy off the hook. let them all be batshit insane morally grey murderers without randomly blaming only one of them for it. please.

i don't mind them forgiving him for the murder spree personally because i don't necessarily think they should've held it against him that much in the first place (despite what the way the show framed it, homelander WAS the priority. they framed it as hughie and butcher being irrational and excessive for working w sb when they were objectively & strategically right

just. mm and annie being pissed at them for working with sb to stop homelander makes about as much sense as. like. if hughie and annie in s2 absolutely refused to accept a-train's help to stop stormfront bc of what he did to robin. that would've been counterproductive, not to mention incredibly fucking stupid, bc stormfront was obviously more powerful, and a much, MUCH bigger threat, + those files were the one way to destroy her. here it's the same. homelander is becoming a bigger threat by the second and sb seemed like the one thing that could stop him. working with him long enough to stop homelander is just prioritizing issues. its just. god. that whole thing is so fucking stupid.

and the temp v?? the fucking. the way they framed the temp v as such an evil thing from the get go and actively punished hughie and butcher for using it when it also. works??? like they obviously had to add in the fact that its killing them to make it actually wrong to use it but like. they didn't know that. and before they knew about it it genuinely just works. within a few days of using it they came closer to destroying vought and killing homelander than they had after almost a decade of trying like. someone said this before but they could've just as well framed it as hughie and butcher selflessly sacrificing themselves with the temp v in a noble attempt to destroy homelander for the greater good and it would've also worked. the forced morals in this whole season were all over the place.

the one thing hughie could've more successfully been framed as being in the wrong for doing imo is the whole not communicating with annie mm etc thing, but like we said, if this only applies to hughie and nobody else gets blamed for not communicating then it just! it doesnt work! it doesnt!!

the whole show is built on insane not so morally good people doing insane not so morally good things. the boys were never supposed to be morally pure good guys. they've done terrible things and the only one ever bothered by it was hughie. why are we suddenly imagining this moral high ground that was never there in s1 or s2 it's just.

annie didn't care about what hughie did with the boys in s2 she was just upset that he didn't tell her and hid stuff from her, which WORKED in s2 because annie DID tell him about what she was up to, the communication was one-sided which is why she was upset sometimes, which is not the case in s3!!! and butcher, i mean, the others might've tried to stop him from doing terrible things sometimes but they didn't expect him not to do them. they didn't hold a grudge. butcher was always extremely clear about his intentions. and annie's no saint either she blackmailed gecko she killed a man it's what makes her fun too she's a murderer they're all murderers but her argument not to work w sb is that he's a murderer i just DONT UNDERSTAND WHAT THEY WERE THINKING WHEN THEY WROTE THIS SEASON. sorry i got carried away. i have. lots of thoughts)