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reactionimagesdaily · 3 years

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I dont understand bionicles at all, so maybe a crash course into like. 1) what a bionicle is 2) general plot of the bionicle story? happy 5k btw <3 love ur page!

OH BOY OH BOY, this is a question I've been waiting for. Thank you so much for asking, and I’m glad you like my page!! <333

A couple of disclaimers, before I start: I'm going to focus mostly on the mainline plot, but let it be known that there WERE a bunch of serial stories and comics and games that added to the story overall. Bionicle was, I think, one of the first big instances of a plot that was consumed through a bunch of different mediums.

I'm also going to try and do a lot of streamlining - it's not that I DON'T want to talk about bionicle, but there's 10+ years of story to cover, so... yeah. :P

Also! Sorry in advance to anyone whose 'read more' function doesn't work, because this is gonna be a doozy

So, what is a bionicle? From a meta perspective, Bionicle is a Lego theme that ran from 2001-2010, and was briefly rebooted from 2015-2016. It's name is a mashup of biological chronicle, and it was hugely successful in its time, essentially helping to save the Lego company from bankruptcy. The idea is that you use finnicky technical pieces to build humanoid figures (and sometimes their vehicles!) and then. play with them

From a textual/lore perspective, I'm not sure Bionicle is an in-universe term lol. But the characters that we recognise as 'bionicles' are grouped into a bunch of different classifications - 'Toa', 'Matoran', 'Makuta', 'Glatorian', and so on. The characters are kinda like inverse cyborgs, where there's metal on the outside and flesh and muscle on the inside. They often function like robots (e.g. have removable and replaceable masks that they constantly wear over their faces) but are still essentially living creatures.

So, what's the general plot of the story?

...[inhales deeply] Okay

In the time before time, there's an island called Mata Nui that sits in the middle of the ocean. It's populated by these dinky lil' guys called 'Matoran' that live in six villages organised by elements - fire, water, ice, air, earth, and stone. They eke out a life as best they can, facing dangerous wild animals (collectively called 'Rahi') and worshipping the Great Spirit, who is confusingly also called Mata Nui. (They named the island after him.) The great spirit, they say, once watched over them all, but was long ago forced into an enchanted sleep by his evil brother.

(These are the matoran. Look at these cute little guys :3)

One day, six canisters wash ashore, on the island's golden beaches. And out of these canisters step six strange figures called Toa. Tall, strong, and heavily armed, there is one of these 'Toa' for each of the villages, and each of these guys have control over an element. They are the main 'heroes' of this story.

(These are the six Toa. Here's a fun game - spot the girl!)

Each of the six Toa are named characters - from left to right we have Onua (wise and grounded), Lewa (fun-loving and mischievous), Pohatu (friendly and confident), Tahu (hot-headed and impulsive), Kopaka (cold and quiet), and Gali (intelligent and compromising). Some of the Matoran are also named characters - there's Jaller, the captain of the guard at the fire village, Hahli, a sports player from the water village, Matoro, a translator from the ice village, and Takua, who's technically from the fire village but is also an 'outsider' who tends to wander the island. Takua is especially important because he becomes the Toa's 'chronicler', following them around on their adventures and writing everything down for posterity.

Without getting into too much detail, the Toa spend two real-life years getting into wacky highjinks. They hunt for masks (as aforementioned, the masks they wear can be removed and replaced) that grant them special powers, fight the Rahi, and also face up against a terrifying race of creatures with mind-control powers called the Bohrok that are determined to strip the island of all life. They also fight against a being called Makuta, a mysterious shadowy figure who claims to be the brother that forced Mata Nui into his slumber. When they first meet him, Makuta takes the form of a Matoran to throw them off, before turning into a nebulous black void and doing his best to murder them all to death.

(Makuta as he appears in 2001's 'Mata Nui Online Game'. As far as villain introductions go, marching out to meet all the heroes and then telling them "I bore you, for I am nothing. It is from nothing that you came, and it is into nothing you will go. The people of this world are builders, but look into their hearts, and you will find they also have the power to destroy. I am that power. I am destruction. And I will destroy you." is pretty fucking solid though I say so myself.)

There’s a lot of cool worldbuilding and mysterious details about the island. At one point, the earth Matoran note that they can only dig so far into the dirt before they come across some hard material - some type of metal - that they just can’t break through. Also, amidst the stars in the sky, there’s an ominous blood-red star that’s appropriately known as the Red Star. What’s it doing there? Nobody knows

Also at one point, the Toa also get mutated into new forms after falling into a liquid that's called 'energized protodermis' but should really be called 'McGuffin Sauce'. There's a lot of changing forms and characters being mutated in this series in general, which I'm sure has nothing to do with the fact that Lego always needed new figures to make into toys.

(This is how the Toa look after being mutated. In these forms, they're referred to as the Toa Nuva -and let me assure you that that distinction will soon become necessary. :P)

So, in 2003 in our world (I’m not sure about the timeline within the lore), Takua the chronicler finds a mysterious mask and brings it back to the Turaga, who are the wise old rulers of the Matoran (The most promiment of the Turaga is the Turaga of fire, who’s called Vakama. He’s an even-tempered and wise old man who’s not above hitting villains with his walking stick if they threaten his village.). It turns out that the mask is special - it’s the mask of Light, and it’s part of a prophecy that involves the arrival of a seventh Toa who’s destined to defeat Makuta. So Takua and Jaller go on an adventure to try and find the seventh Toa.

Meanwhile, Makuta isn’t just going to sit around and wait for the Toa who’s destined to defeat him to rock up: he unleashes his secret weapons, the Rahkshi, who are, in lore, suits of armour driven by slugs. Sounds corny - in practice, they’re hella intimidating.

(Look at these bad boys)

Some more adventures happen and, to make a long story short, the Rahkshi kill Jaller and Takua the chronicler puts the mask of light onto his own face, transforming into Takanuva, the Toa of Light. The audience surrogate and ‘weird’ character was the secret hero all along!! I love that honestly.

(Takua and Takanuva - before and after)

As someone with light powers, Takanuva is essentially the perfect counter to the big bad Makuta, who has shadow powers, so he finds Makuta’s lair intent on beating him. Makuta challenges him to a game that’s called ‘Kohlii’ but is basically this universe’s version of lacrosse - Takanuva accepts and proceeds to wipe the floor with him. During their fight, they fall into another conveniently-placed pool of energized protodermis and become merged, forming a new being called ‘Takutanuva’. Takutanuva doesn’t stick around very long, because he’s this weird contradictory being of both light and shadow, but before he fractures he opens a gate underneath Mata Nui and lets the Toa, the Turaga, and some named Matoran get through. Inside, they find a hidden city - a whole other world.

Takutanuva then manages to use his powers to hack the universe and bring Jaller back to life. Hooray! After that, he dies, and Takanuva is back. Makuta is nowhere to be found. [eyes emoji]

So now the Toa, the old Turaga, and a couple of Matoran are inside this whole new location, and they’re all wondering what the heck is going on. Well, not all of them are wondering. Vakama, the head Turaga, steps forward and admits that actually, the six (seven) Toa heros that we’ve come to know and love... aren’t actually the first Toa. Gasp!

The next two years of sets and story are essentially one giant flashback, as Vakama tells the current heroes about adventures past. It turns out that the hidden city they’ve found is called Metru Nui, and once upon a time, Vakama and the other Turaga were Toa themselves, fighting to keep the city and the matoran safe.

(New (old) Toa! The flying green one is Matau, who was a stunt-driving excitable madman, and then on the ground from left to right we have Whenua (nerdy chronicler), Nokama (schoolteacher-turned-superhero), Vakama (anxiety-ridden leader), Nuju (absent-minded stargazer), and Onewa (racist prick who needs (and gets) a character arc). To differentiate themselves from the Toa that we’ve come to know and love, these Toa are the Toa Metru)

They had a bunch of adventures of their own. They fought the Vahki (capture robots upholding an authoritarian police state) and the Morbuzakh (evil sentient vines), and they also had ‘arch enemies’ in the form of the Dark Hunters, who were mercenaries that hunted Toa.

Also, that story about Makuta putting Mata Nui to sleep? Not a story so much as a history lesson! Ultimately, the reason that the city of Metru Nui was abandoned was because Mata Nui WAS awake, watching over them all, but then Makuta forced him into slumber and essentially caused a cataclysm. The Matoran were rounded up and forced to sleep as well, and the Toa Metru had to flee the city. When they came back, it had been overrun with Visorak (basically giant spiders), and they had to fight hard to defeat the horde and its leaders and escape with all of the sleeping Matoran.

Once they left Metru Nui (and arrived on the island that would become Mata Nui), the Toa Metru sacrificed their powers to wake up all the Matoran - which is how they transformed into the wise old Turaga. Also, the Matoran woke up with no memories, which is how they’d never known about Metru Nui up until this point.

Anyways, after exploring Metru Nui and making plans to move back in, everyone does some digging around and discover something about Mata Nui: his spirit is fading. Whatever Makuta did to him, it not only put him to sleep, but it’s also slowly killing him. After presumably having an existential crisis, the gang come up with a solution: there’s another legendary mask, the Mask of Life, that should be able to resuscitate Mata Nui, or at the very least, keep him from kicking the bucket while he’s sleeping.

(The Mask of Life! If you look closely, you can see that the faceplate is shaped like a humanoid figure (because, yaknow, life) and if you think that’s not the tightest shit ever you can get out of my face)

So, the modern-day Toa (the Toa Nuva, if you guys remember the name) are like ‘okay, give us the location of the mask, we’ll go and find it’. So they get sent to another island, this one called Voya Nui, and they arrive and... get their asses handed to them? What?

A quick backtrack: a gang of thugs called the Piraka had already arrived on Voya Nui in search of the Mask of Life, wanting it so they can use its power to blackmail powerful organisations and generally get ahead in the criminal world. (From a Meta perspective, they’re,,, really interesting. Up until this point, the villains in Bionicle had either been wild animals, or villains with grand overarching plans. These guys are basically overpowered street thugs, complete with their own theme song - the ‘Piraka Rap’. Look it up on YouTube; it’s fucking hilarious, because the rest of Bionicle is generally timeless, but the Piraka Rap was basically dated as soon as it came out. I love it.)

(The Piraka themselves! Fun fact; in Bionicle lore, ‘Piraka’ is a slang term for ‘thief’ and ‘murderer’, and was also considered so vulgar that if a Matoran called another Matoran ‘Piraka’, war would be declared over it. These guys are really just going around calling themselves slurs. I have to respect that.)

So, yeah. The Piraka defeat and imprison the Toa Nuva when they get to the island. Now what?

Well, now it’s time for the Matoran to get involved! A group of named and previously-established Matoran set out to see if they can rescue the Toa. There’s Jaller, Hahli, and Matoro, who I’ve already mentioned, and then there’s Kongu, Nuparu, and Hewkii. And I need to take a break to say that all these characters have been with the story since 2001 (it’s now 2006), and they’ve all contributed to the plot before!! Kongu is a prominent Matoran from the air village who led a flight of giant bird-riders to save the day one time, and Nuparu is an engineer from the earth village who basically invented mechs to help the Matoran defend themselves against the Bohrok. These guys are BADASSES and I want to bring up how a really strong initial 3 years of storytelling laid a great foundation for so many small characters. It’s just neat! :D

Anyways, these Matoran travel to the island of Voya Nui in canisters (like how the original Toa landed on Mata Nui) and while they’re sailing the ocean blue, their canisters are struck by lighting from the mysterious Red Star. And that lighting, say it with me now, TRANSFORMS them! Specifically it transforms them into Toa. They end up calling themselves the Toa Inika, because they’re searching for the mask of life, which is also called the ‘Ignika’.

(The Toa Inika. Being transformed by a bolt of lighting means that in addition to their regular elemental powers, they also have electric/lighting abilities.)

Souped-up and ready for action, the Toa Inika manage to defeat the Piraka and rescue the Toa Nuva. However, through plot shenanagins, the Mask of Life ends up being sent to the bottom of the ocean around Voya Nui, and the Toa Inika learn that under the waves is a hidden city - Mahri Nui. As they descend, the Mask of Life does something odd; it sends out a wave of energy, transforming the Toa Inika so that they can breath underwater. So now, they’re the Toa Mahri. (Because they’re headed to Mahri Nui. You get me?)

Mahri Nui is ruled by the Barraki - ancient warlords who were imprisoned under the sea many thousands of years ago after they became powerful enough to threaten Mata Nui himself. They were put in a prison called The Pit, but during the cataclysm caused by Makuta putting Mata Nui to sleep, the city of Mahri Nui sunk into the water and slammed into the Pit. Many prisoners and Matoran died, but the Barraki were freed. Uh-oh, spaghetti-ohs.

Speaking of Makuta - guess who’s back! Thought dead after no-one could find him after Takutanuva died, it turns out that his spirit is possessing a robot body that had previously been a prison guard. He spends some time hanging out with one of the Toa Mahri, Matoro, basically playing mind games with him and trying to get him to turn to the dark side. Eventually, three different characters and factions smack the shit out of him, and he slips out of the robot body to go do... something else (watch this space).

This year of story was REALLY plot-heavy and I kinda can’t do it justice here. The important developments are that the Toa Mahri eventually manage to reclaim the Mask of Life, and Matoro yoinks it. While his teammates act as a big distraction, he swims away and puts on the mask. It basically grants him ultimate power, but it also fuckin’ kills him. His final acts are to teleport his friends to safety, and then release a massive burst of energy that burns him up and saves Mata Nui’s life. The Mask of Life, with no-one left to wear it, sinks into the ocean.

(“In his last moments, Matoro feels no fear. He know he has succeeded--the Toa Mahri are safe, able to resume their lives in Metru Nui. The Turaga and Matoran will know that they became true heroes. Matoro does not see himself as a hero. As a Matoran, a Toa Inika, and a Toa Mahri, all he ever tried to do was his duty. Now that duty has led him to his destiny.”- Bionicle Ignition 11: Death of a Hero)

[dries tears] Anyways, now that Mata Nui’s life has been saved, the only thing left to do is wake him back up. To do that, the Toa Nuva (the Toa that showed up at the very beginning of this story, if you recall) need to journey to the core of the universe, and a civilisation called Karda Nui. Three of the Toa Nuva - Lewa, Pohatu, and Kopaka - are sent to a village in the clouds, where they protect the local matoran and battle the forces of Makuta. Because, as it turns out, the big bad Makuta that we know? Makuta is actually the name of his species. The guy just wanted to feel special, apparently. The Makuta that the Toa have been fighting for over half a decade is technically called Makuta Teridax (or just Teridax), while the other Makuta have other names that I can’t remember off the top of my head.

Anyways, while those three Toa are figuring that out, the other three - Tahu, Gali, and Onua - journey to a place called the Swamp of Secrets in order to find a set of keystones that supposedly contain instructions on how to awaken Mata Nui. And it’s there that they find an unlikely ally: the Mask of Life itself.

See, the Mask of Life has always been a weird one - if you recall, it released an energy pulse for no reason that transformed the Toa Mahri and let them breath underwater. (It’s also done some other fucky stuff that I haven’t been able to mention - there’s a short story about how one time, a guy touched it, and it gave him the ability to involuntarily bring everything around him to life, which ultimately drove him mad. So. You know. That’s fun.) Well, it turns out that when the mask sank into the ocean after Matoro’s death, it ultimately ended up in the swamps of Karda Nui, and it senses the battles raging about it. More than that, but it remembers Matoro’s bravery as he donned the mask knowing it would kill him, and remembers how his final wish was to save his friends. Wanting to know what it means to be a hero, the Mask of Life creates a body for itself, and ventures out into the swamp to discover its destiny.

(The Mask of Life has a body now!! Good for him! Good for him.)

There’s some more shenanigans that I’m skipping over - at one point, Takanuva (Toa of light, remember him?) rocks up to help. Long story short, our eight heroes - Tahu, Gali, Onua, Lewa, Kopaka, Pohatu, Takanuva, and the Mask of Life - fight their way through the Makuta and into the very core of the universe - the Codrex. Inside, after yet more shenanigans, the Mask of Life figures that in order to wake Mata Nui up, it will have to sacrifice the body it’s built for itself. The moment is sad, but the mask remembers Matoro’s sacrifice, and is inspired to act. He sacrifices his dreams of becoming a hero, and in doing so, becomes a hero... ;_;

The mask flies deep into the Codrex, its body dissolving; when it reaches the bottom, it creates a massive energy storm that the other characters have to escape. (Our heroes make it out - most of the villains end up getting vaporized, big RIP.)

And just like that, the journey is over. After years of battle, the Toa Nuva have completed their purpose, and awakened the great spirit, thus bringing peace back to the land. Everyone meets back up in Metru Nui - the Toa Nuva, the Toa Mahri, the Turaga, the remaining Matoran. It’s a glorious day. And as they gather, something happens.

Deep, deep beneath the ocean, energy pulses through rock, and machines that have been dormant for millennia begin to whirr and move. The island of Mata Nui - long abandoned as the Matoran moved back down into Metru Nui - cracks open like a wallnut, each half sliding into the sea. From underneath where the island had been, a tremendous head rises out of the ocean, countless galleons of water pouring off of it. Titanic shoulders follow. Then the chest, and the limbs, and slowly, surely, Mata Nui rises.

Meta context: for years, the nature of Mata Nui has been a mystery. Is he a metaphysical being? Is he a real person? No-one was sure... but they know now. That solid material that the earth Matoran couldn’t mine through, all the way back in 2001? That was his skin. The mysterious red star that created the Toa Inika? That was a failsafe machine orbiting Mata Nui, poised to create new Toa as necessary. The island of Mata Nui was atop his head, Metru Nui was his brain, Karda Nui was deep in his guts. The Matoran were workers to keep him functioning, the Toa were basically his immune system (the canisters they arrive in are literally shaped like pills)... All this time, all these stories, all these characters, this entire world - they have all been inside a robot the size of continents.

(Fucking hell. Look at this. The clouds come up to his ankles.)

Celebrations ripple through Metru Nui as everyone realises what has happened. The great spirit is awake again! The Toa have won! But as the Turaga raise their voices to try and congratulate the Toa, a chill spreads over the spectators as the air grows cold. Everyone stops and looks around. What’s happening now? And then, from everywhere and nowhere, a voice rumbles. It’s a familiar voice. An unwelcome voice. A voice that most of the gathered heroes thought they’d never hear again.

It’s the voice of Makuta - the original Makuta. Makuta Teridax.

And what does he say?

“I AM EVERYWHERE. I AM EVERYTHING YOU SEE.”

Matoro’s sacrifice had ensured that Mata Nui’s body did not die, but before the great spirit’s consciousness could return, Makuta supplanted it with his own. After that, all he had to do was wait for the Toa Nuva to achieve their objective. And as they finished the fight and won the day, they handed victory to him on a silver platter. No longer does he need to strive to rule the universe - he is the universe.

(Meta perspective again but like: FUCK, man. I can’t emphasise enough how mind-breaking this was for the kids who were invested in the series. Think Thanos snapping his fingers in Infinity War, except probably more devastating, because there wasn’t a direct sequel lined up to give the heroes another chance, and there wasn’t a way to ‘undo’ it. This was a plot development that we all had to live with T_T)

(You can tell things are bad because his eyes changed from green to red.)

And what of Mata Nui? What about the spirit that the Toa were actually trying to wake up?

Oh, Makuta stuffed Mata Nui’s consciousness into the Mask of Life - and then blasted the Mask into space.

[inhales deeply]

man...

Okay, in all honesty, part of me wanted to end it there. But you know what? We’ve come this far. And there is more to the story. So I’m going to ignore my concern I won’t be able to do it justice and blunder on.

Bionicle’s last chapter (2009-2010) follows Mata Nui himself - no longer an abstract spiritual concept, but rather a concrete character. A god felled from his pedestal, struggling to find a way to save his people. And it’s AWESOME. Armed with only the Mask of Life and a sentient shield named Click, he wanders the shithole deserts of the planet he crash-lands on, bringing the disparate tribes together, uncovering secrets about who made him and what his ultimate purpose is, and learning what it means to be a regular person. Also, at one point, in a move very reminiscent of the god that he once was, he turns a guy into a snake. You know. As a ‘fuck you’.

(There’s something really cool to me about a main character being someone who essentially lost all the power of the cosmos. Mata Nui might just be my fave character in this whole story honestly.)

Eventually, Mata Nui discovers some crucial pieces of information. Firstly: the planet that he’s landed on, Bara Magna, is his ‘homeworld’ in that it’s where his giant god body was built. Secondly: the two moons orbiting Bara Magna (the jungle moon of Bota Magna and the ocean moon of Aqua Magna) were once part of the planet itself, and split off during a planet-destroying cataclysm, leaving behind a desert wasteland in their wake. Third: the function he was ultimately built for (his ‘destiny’) was to reunite the three celestial bodies into one planet, bringing life back to Bara Magna’s harsh desert environments. He was on his way to complete this task when Makuta crashed his systems with a computer virus - which was what forced him into the ‘slumber’ that he was in for most of the mainline story.

His fourth, and probably most important discovery, is that he’s essentially his makers’ second attempt at a world-fixing giant robot. Before creating him, his makers (the ‘Great Builders’) constructed a giant robot that malfunctioned and exploded. Long-deactivated, the pieces of it are still scattered through the deserts of Bara Magna - in fact, many of the villages on the planet are set up in or around these giant robot pieces. Mata Nui figures that if he can reconstruct this old robot, he can use it to complete his destiny, and maybe even save his people.

It isn’t easy. He has to convince the villagers he’s come to befriend (the Agori) to give up their homes and their safety, and he has to find an experimental power source that’ll actually get the giant metal body moving again. But eventually, he figures it all out. Powered by the experimental source, the Mask of Life, and probably also friendship, he inhabits this enormous form and rises once again. Without missing a beat, he reaches out and begins to pull the moons towards the main planet. As far as he’s concerned, he’s going to fix everything, or die trying.

(The power of skybeams)

However, it won’t be that simple. Makuta senses that Mata Nui’s spirit has inhabited a new form (and I don’t mean that in a metaphysical way, I mean that in a computer/technology way), and he quickly jets over to Bara Magna. Obviously, flinging the fucker into space wasn’t good enough. It’s time for him to destroy Mata Nui, mano y mano. Giant robot y giant robot.

(Makuta and Mata Nui, facing off. God I love this picture.)

It’s the final battle - for real this time. The two giant robots begin to punch each other, and Mata Nui is up against some obvious disadvantages. For one thing, he can’t risk attacking Makuta with all his might, because he doesn’t want to hurt his people, who are still inside the giant robot. (Inside, they’re fairing... poorly. It’s like facism, but if facism was being actively enforced by God.)

In the fight, a hole gets blasted in Makuta’s body, and out pour a whole LOAD of Rahkshi. (Remember those guys?) However, Tahu and Takanuva also manage to escape, and join a ground battle that’s breaking out between the Agori (and their protectors, the Glatorians), the Skrall (a tribe of warriors native to Bara Magna who are absolute dicks - I’ve had to gloss over them, unfortunately, but believe me when I say that they’ve been major antagonists for as long as the narrative has focused on Bara Magna), and a bunch of guys who are called ‘Piraka’ but aren’t the gang of thugs from Voya Nui. (I think they’re the same... species?) Long story short: large-scale shitfight is happening at the feet of the two robots that are slugging it out. Makuta, being a dick, decides to try and literally stamp on all of Mata Nui’s friends down below, and Mata Nui has to desperately hold him off.

Around this point, the Mask of Life (which is really the MVP of this whole story) uses its convenient energy bursts to imbue Tahu with a set of golden armour that allows him to release energy blasts of its own. (Why it singles out Tahu, I’m not sure, but I’m presuming it’s because Tahu was the first face of the series and it just makes thematic sense for him to be a major player in the final battle.) Tahu uses his new golden armour to disintegrate ALL of the Rahkshi - and there were a lot of them on the field of battle, let me assure you. Makuta feels the loss of so many creations at once, and falters, and Mata Nui seizes his chance. He’d done his work well before Makuta had arrived, and the jungle moon is now in low orbit above the planet. Pouring every last ounce of his strength into one more push, he surges forward and up, pushing Makuta up and making sure that his head is right in the path of the falling planet.

Crunch.

(Kudos to Makuta Teridax for being such a persistent antagonist that the only way to get rid of him for good was to drop an entire damn planet on his head.)

Mata Nui guides the falling body carefully to the ground, letting it open and freeing his people. The remaining Skrall and Piraka surrender. The Matoran and Toa meet and mingle with the Agori and Glatorian. Mata Nui raises his hands, and completes his purpose; aided one last time by the Mask of Life, as well as his body’s innate systems, he enacts a synthesis on the now-united celestial bodies. Lush forests and large bodies of water appear in the desert. Life flourishes. Birds probably start to sing. Mata Nui has completed his purpose, and vindicated all of the heroes who fought for him for so long.

He feels himself fading. He lets his spirit withdraw into the Mask of Life. A new slumber - this one, earned, and of his own volition.

Perhaps one day, he will return.

(“We will honour Mata Nui, and all those who fought for him, in our memories. But the time has come to move on. His destiny is fulfilled, and for many of us, it has yet to be written. My friends, it is time to go.”- Tahu, The Mata Nui Saga, chapter 34.)

And there we go! Very, VERY long, but that’s the general plot of bionicle. There are an absolute tone of details I’ve missed out or skipped over, and I encourage you to search them out for yourself if you’re interested. But them’s the basics! :D

#Also: love (as in romantic love) is 'not canon' in the Bionicle universe. Big win for the aromantics #(I couldn't find a place in my lore explanation to mention that but my friend Zacch insisted I mention it somewhere)#also... fuck me dead this is a long post. I spent literal hours writing all of this down. Was it worth it? probably.#not a pic #Someone asked me a thing!#Ask mood: Don't Get Me Started #bionicle #bionicle lore #bionicle story

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sparrowmoth · 3 years

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Evie for the character ask game?

@coldhideoutwombat Thank you! ♥️ (Evie was also requested by @moorsgrimhilde, so this is for her, too. 💕)

First impression: KILLER QUEEN. Evie immediately reminded me in many ways of certain dear friends of mine sandwiched together, especially considering her dynamic with Mal, which makes me miss said certain people an extra lot (middle finger to c*vid for that). Anyway, as with Mal, I was hella disappointed when I realized her arc was gonna be about a guy, but anyway. :)

Impression now: oh she’s still a killer queen. <3 My impression is that every day she wakes up and chooses elegance, but not without a knife strapped to her thigh, just out of sight beneath her skirt. My impression is that Evie loves knives and does not put up with bullshit, because she had enough of that on the Isle. She also has a soft, nurturing, deeply compassionate side though, and no one sees that side of her more than Jay, Mal, and Carlos. They know better than to assume that’s all there is to her though. Those who underestimate her, well...

Favorite moment: I mean, Space Between is pretty fucking iconic, but that aside, I love every moment where Evie looks like she’s about to kill a bitch. She has this habit of showing up behind Mal with her hands on her hips and her eyes narrowed and I just have this headcanon that Mal isn’t half as scary as she thinks she is. People just see Evie behind her radiating murder energy and they’re like “oh shit,” but Mal never realizes who’s actually intimidating them because by the time she turns around, Evie is all smiles for her lmao.

Idea for a story: Off the top of my head (inspired by the sweater I’m wearing lmao), Alice in Wonderland AU where Evie is Alice and Carlos is the white rabbit. He leads her into Wonderland where she meets Jay (the blue caterpillar) and Mal (the Cheshire Cat). I don’t know what all goes on at that point, but the aesthetic is so good in my mind, I’m really digging it lol.

Unpopular opinion: So… this isn’t so much something I see spoken as simply written/drawn, but… I don’t like that the whole “fairest of all” thing turns into Evie being drawn/described as white. Like porcelain doll white. Yeah, Sofia has fair skin, but listen… this is a sensitive subject for a lot of mixed race POC and I can only speak to it from my own Mestizx (Latinx) background, but the association of being the “fairest” (whitest) with being the most beautiful is something painfully rooted in colonialism (i.e., it's racist af).

The skin-colour based hierarchy that was introduced in Latin America several hundred years ago now (not exclusively, of course, but that's my geographic focus atm) still exists and deeply affects our communities. It’s not something I want to go into more than that for my purposes here. All I’m saying is that I’d like to see less of Evie being paler than Mal, at the very least. Say she’s the fairest and make that mean beautiful, not white. <3

Favorite relationship: Malvie and Rotten OT4 (the former always being romantic, the latter being either romantic or platonic because there’s a multiverse in my head where I get to have everything I want lmao). I have a real soft spot for Carvie as best friends (parallel to Jal), too.

Favorite headcanon: Evie is a witch and she owns it! Not like in the movies where I honestly forget the girl is a witch because she’s always just standing back and letting Mal do all the magic. Evie’s magical as fuck, my friends.

Send Me A Character

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shirari · 3 years

Text

My moots as random stuff in my house

Headcanons by. Your lovely moot Hikari LMAO

Why am I doing this? Cuz I keep on associating hq characters as the stuff here as well and ur the victim now HAHAHJSJJDMSMS

Any who, forgive me for bothering you <\3

If I missed anyone, it's maybe cuz I'm still a bit timid to tag you??? If anything, pls hmu to be added cuz there are tons of stuff here aakwndksndjsndn. Non moots can ask for a haikyuu character tho.

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☆Oya @oni-girx

The coffee table

Cuz I'm always around the coffee table when I'm downstairs and never even bother eating on the dining table. The same way I'm always in groupchats instead of servers in discord goodbye-

It's hella messy on it too like?? Why is my febreeze down here wth put it back in my room-

Haikyuu character I associated this item with : Kotarou Bokuto/Yuu Nishinoya (this place has so many random stuff on it like how Bokuto randomly goes emo or even radiates Noya's chaotic energy-)

☆Rosie @sookyshima

Well, my favourite old handbag my *mom bought me way back in the end of 2018.

It was bright red, but it's worn out now sadly.

The colour looked good with any of my outfits ngl, cuz i wear lots of dark colours lol

I cherished this handbag the same way I cherish my elder moot, Rosie <333

No I'm not calling you old. I'm just born too late🧍🏻‍♀️

Haikyuu character I associated this item with : Tetsurou Kuroo (Red looks hot on him and the fact *Kuroo doesn't have a mother.... It hurts me a little bit)

☆Spencer @spiritingawaytoanime

The yummy meiji crackers I only occasionally eat.

I love the crackers but I only have it when I felt like it </3

Same as our interactions lately, very occasional but enjoyable uwu

Btw I was kinda confused... Who's elliot-

Haikyuu character I associated this item with : Tsutomu Goshiki (I only simp for him whenever I actually feel like, especially when I scroll through general shiratorizawa content occasionally lol)

☆Lili @lilikags

For some reason, my dad's chamomile tea

Idk why but I literally smell fragrance tea when I see you around tumblr interacting or I'm just scrolling around 🤷🏻‍♀️

And I liked that, however it kinda intimidated me cuz it smelled elegant-

It smelled something like Chai tea. Anything classy actually.

Haikyuu character I associated this item with : Akaashi Keiji (English breakfast sounds nice or maybe even Earl Grey :D)

☆Inez @shoyotime

The grandfather wall clock

It's old and classy, but it needs some repairs to work again.

I actually don't know why but it's one of the prettiest things I see in my house lol. So as you Inez :')

Some have said you're quite mature, so it makes sense in some way? Yeah :D

Haikyuu character I associated this item with : Wakatoshi Ushijima (Wakatoshi radiates those dark academia vibes and I think it's really classy, me love)

☆Nova @mysterystarz

Your url makes me think of the star shaped fairy lights hung around my porch-

It's pretty so makes sense hehe

I'm getting sleepy as I write omg-why am I spending 1 whole minute on how do I elaborate

Okay screw it, you're simply the stars to Keiji's universe uwu

Haikyuu character I associated this item with : Kourai Hoshiumi (Hoshiumi means star sea so-)

☆El @sugurus-princess

I say ur my black acoustic guitar cuz it fits ur blog theme :D

I literally waited years for the time I start learning guitar. Sadly, I don't really have time or motivation anymore cuz I've been so burnt out :')

Okay why th is Hikari Are (Haikyuu op season 3) moonlight version by BurnOut Syndromes playing while talking about my guitar omfg 😭

The song I was trying to learn recently was Pure Imagination :')

Haikyuu character I associated this item with : Aran Ojiro (no I'm not being racist because my guitar is black, I cherish my guitar sm and I'm soft for Aran pls😭❤️)

☆Xy @xybi

Bread/The brand new bread maker my dad bought last week

Every time I see you around, I can smell bakery pastries like tarts and sweet buns for some reason. Oh and also cookies.

I ain't even Tanjiro/Gonpachiro but here I am smelling my moots auras in tumblr

Idk u that much so far but I guess u can be many things the same way pastries do. (sweet, salty, sour or savoury kinds of things like that??)

Haikyuu character I associated this item with : Tooru Oikawa (cuz I immediately thought of making milkbread when I heard about getting a bread maker lol)

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hikari's word. Wondering about your favourite as something random? Hmu at @hikaoi ! My writing blog for the headcanon. It's still empty so I wanted to fill it somehow for now hehe

#Which is Aran's last name-#Send help kabxksjdn #🌼hikari.is.speaking #🍙~moots! oya #🌌~moots! nova #🌹~moots! rosie #🐦~moots! lili #☕~moots! xy #🍁~moots! spencer #🍂~moots! inez #📚~moots! el #haikyuu headcanons

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atsuwiee · 3 years

Note

omo congrats on reaching 600 followers you definitely deserve them 🎉🎉🥳 and for you event i'm joining and can the match up be with one of the tokyo revengers characters?? :)) ahhh i hope the information is enough

Personality:

i would describe myself as a introverted person and needed much more time to be able to adapt to social situations since they make me uncomfortable and awkward. because of this, i hole up in my home for as long as i can but the main reason is that i hate the idea of going outside. as an intp-t, i tend to keep my thoughts to myself most of the time unless someone asks me for my input then i'll say what's on my mind. i have a habit to daydream a lot especially when it comes to certain topic related to mathematics or economics, they're just hella boring. i am a musical person that have a wide range of music taste, especially classical and jazz but recently i got into bardcore 👌 i'm also a bookworm and read any types of books i can get my hands on. i am also a no-nonsense person and can't tolerate trash talk at all, if that happens, i don't even bat an eye towards them. i used to be the "won't forgive and won't forget" type in the past but now it's the "forgive but not forget" type. i do have this tendency to ignore eye contact when interacting with strangers even went as far as to ignore their existence, maybe mumble a response to show i'm listening to their words. i will warm up to them if they can show me how trustworthy they can be and it might take weeks or months. when i do open up to my friends, i can be helpful with their homework or can be the one listening to their rants and give advices. in the friend circle, i have the role of the listener, since i mainly listen to their conversation and adding my words here and there. i am a procrastinator, especially when teachers assigned projects i don't like, and do them few days before the due date but i still got the work done.

Habits :

i play with the hem of my shirt or my sleeve when i get nervous and starts to look at the ground like it's the best thing in the world. i also have lots of plushies and cuddle them every time i go to bed, it makes me feel safe. i can be insensitive sometimes and blurting out something i shouldn't have but i'm quick to stop myself when that happens, unless it's during an argument. i become sarcastic and passive aggressive when i'm angry but sometimes i will block everything out and take some time for myself to cool down. i worry about money sometimes to the point where i lack sleep because of it, though it rarely happens.

Likes :

writing, playing the piano and guitar, reading, listening to music, practicing my martial arts (taekwondo), taking naps, poetry, loyalty, flowers symbolism, my bed and pillows, plushies, sweaters, baggy shirts & pants, anything oversized, money

Dislikes :

cockroaches, noisy people and places, skimpy clothes, skirts, insincere people, children, mistrust, maths, junk food, hot weather, mosquitoes, racists, homophobic people, cigarette smoke

How I dress:

i dress casual and comfy, if i'm being lazy, i just grab a shirt and shorts and that's that. if i made an effort of dressing myself up, i wear whatever that are suitable for the occasion, and my clothes are mostly black and dark blue.

Love Language:

quality time and acts of service. even though i appreciate words of affirmation, but i value the two more than the rest.

i match you with... chifuyu matsuno!

i have a feeling you'd match with chifuyu's vibe JSHKJH

he's really caring and considerate for you, when there are times you have a hard time and just keep it to yourself (but he can tell there's a problem) he'll give you time but he's there to comfort you.

finds your taekwondo skills cool and awesome, sometimes he'd ask you to teach him because it looks cool lol. if you are having doubts he is quick to reassure you with warm hugs and words of reassurance (as i said he really will care for you)

i hope you liked this<3 !

#600 follower event ! ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers imagines #tokyo revengers x reader

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sunsetcarnation264 · 3 years

Text

So, uh, that DT17 finale huh?

I would've made this right after I watched the finale, but I wanted to give it a bit of time to sink in fully and made sure I thought everything through before giving my thoughts on it. Not the worst finale there is, but it definitely could've been way better in my opinion. I've heard about the finale from my friends who've seen it, which from the sounds of it I already wasn't liking it, but since I've seen the finale now, how I feel about it is now concrete and set in stone and I feel the same as before. Maybe how I feel about it is in the minority side, or maybe a majority side, I dunno but I don't care. It's not the best it could've been and I'll explain why below. If you like it, good for you I guess because everyone's tastes are different, but I personally don't and I feel like the show deserves a much better finale than this. HEAVY DUTY DISCLAIMER: Just because I'm criticizing the finale doesn't mean I don't love the series, in fact it's because I love the show that I'm giving criticism and give what I would’ve done instead, and if you're anything like me and you're hella late to the party then there'll be spoilers for the finale. If you haven't caught up on the last episode, then you're not missing much honestly, but if you don't like spoilers regardless then watch that first then come back

The first part of the finale starts off like any other DuckTales 2017 episode. It's Webby's birthday, everyone's keeping their eyes out for F.O.W.L. shit, and Webby's enjoying herself. After a bit everyone goes below Funso's and they end up in F.O.W.L.'s territory. F.O.W.L. sets everything up to be on self-destruct, so they gotta find them and stop the self-destruction. They did happen to do the latter, but the F.O.W.L. members already escaped with almost everything. Just almost. The gang end up finding May and June, who're clones and they presume they're clones of Webby. Now this is where I'm starting to not like the finale. Yeah, you can do clones as like a plot twist, but at the same time it feels a bit outta nowhere. Had they foreshadowed it in another episode or have it lead up to the whole "oh shit there's clones of a character we know and love" thing then I wouldn't have a problem, but this came outta nowhere and I kept an eye on possible foreshadowing during season 3 and the rest of season 2 post The Duck Knight Returns too so I would've picked something up. The only thing that could count as foreshadowing was when Beakley promised Webby that she won't keep anymore secrets from her and the harp was saying "fibbing fibbing fibbing", but that's just it. Part two of the finale, Gyro does tests on them to see who they might've been clones of. He tries to tell everyone what the results are but when Scrooge asks him, he said it didn't come up with anything for him to answer the question. Beakley thinks they're both dangerous and locks them up in a closet. Webby, being a naive little girl, wants to talk to them because they're essentially her 'sisters' and she wants to know them more even though Beakley straight up tells her not to interact with them. Webby disregards what Beakley says anyways and she frees them, talks to them, and tries to show them her family tree so they can figure out where May and June came from. May and June are basically like "ehhhh this is your family tree? Who tf are you related to besides Beakley?" yeah, as if extended family or found family still ain't family you jerks. In the meantime, Louie just wants to watch his Ottoman Empire finale which ends up being shitty foreshadowing for the last part of this finale. You'll see why I mentioned this later. They even see Lena and Violet on there and are like "okay but who're those" which Webby responds with how they're her best friends and guess what one of the two clones goes to do? One of them grabs scissors and tries to cut it. When she does cut it, Lena's like "aw hell no bitch" and uses magic on her. Webby being Webby, is completely upset about this because "that was my sister how could you do that" and runs off like how one of the clones ran off. Bitch you only knew her for like five seconds, just because y'all be related don't mean you automatically THIS close to each other like how you are with Lena, Violet, Huey, Dewey, Louie, and anybody else in the McDuck family. I personally believe that love, trust, and respect is what makes people family, not blood/DNA, adoption, or they were married into the family or a step sib/kid/etc. If they're a harmful dick (i.e. a bigot who's queerphobic and/or racist or if they're an abuser, murderer, etc.) then you don't gotta treat them like family or say that they're your family. But anyways we're probs getting off topic, point is that she should trust those who she's known forever instead of clones she knew for a few minutes. Everybody tries to find Webby and one of the clones that ran off. Webby bumped into Beakley as she was tryna find May or June (I think May tho, don't recall) and she tries to lie her way outta it but Beakley knows what's up lol. She says that Webby wants to see the clones, Webby goes with it, and the younger duck wants to know who her parents were. Beakley tells her who her parents were (which might've either been a lie or she was describing herself and a late significant other that we've seen in Webby's picture of her parents) and Webby accepts it. Cut to later when she catches May and June trying to steal the ancient artifacts that Scrooge and co. retrieved during the entirety of season 3. She's shocked that they're even doing this, they all fight each other, and May escaped while June got knocked out. Webby disguises herself as June while she takes her outside where F.O.W.L. awaited them with an aircraft, most importantly Bradford. We only find out Webby was disguising herself as June when everyone got on. Huey notices what's going on and he goes after them, somewhat hiding in the aircraft before everyone leaves for the F.O.W.L. hideout. Not gonna lie, that was a pretty smart plan by Webby. Considering they all look identical and Webby's good at imitation, she can actually get away with this pretty well. This I actually really like and I wouldn't change too much about this. When Huey reveals himself to the three, Webby reveals herself to him but tells him to play along so they ain't fucked over. Somewhat worked. Webby keeps making little slips here and there which makes May hella suspicious of her. They land at the hideout, Webby tries to get what info she can while Huey's taken away. Thanks to the help of Pepper (who I love btw and I think deserves the best ;____;), Webby ends up finding the document room where there's documents on May, June, and a third person with the codename of April. She watches it and oh, shit, it turns out Bentina Beakley actually snatched her ass from F.O.W.L. when she was a baby! What a shocker! She couldn't believe what she was seeing! This is actually fine to me, her possibly being a clone actually makes sense because she could've been a clone of Beakley. Plus it's also a huge reference to how Webby was created to be a combination of Daisy's nieces April, May, and June back in the original series, though I dunno how many people would catch that, especially younger fans who might not have done the research to getting all of the references and easter eggs here. When Beakley was brought in (essentially she knocked Scrooge out without hurting him, went to here alone to take care of F.O.W.L. once and for all just for Webby, but got defeated along with some of the McDucks), everyone leaves Beakley, Webby, and the Harp alone and Webby somewhat confronts Beakley about her past. Needless to say, Webby ain't excited about this and she gets captured and tied up. She's actually pretty depressed, which I mean in a way I don't blame her since she wanted to know if that shit was real or if F.O.W.L. was fabricating it. Cut to Huey being brought to Bradford. Apparently he was a fellow Woodchuck too, though he wasn't the best despite being the very first Woodchuck by his grandmother Isabella Finch, in fact he was the worst which hahaha yeah I can actually believe that. It does explain why he hates adventures and all of that shit, one of the only things I'm willing to accept from the finale. He talks about how he wants to complete the collection "for the better" because Scrooge and everyone else in the family were the only ones to have Isabella's lost journal. Huey believes this at first. He stops believing it once he ends up finding Gyro and everyone else who're locked up. In the meantime, Bradford drags Webby out to a sort of box along with May and June. She doesn't know why she's brought up here. When she gets close to the box, the papyrus appears because... She's the descendant of... Of Scrooge McDuck. Okay no, JUST NAH MAN. This is where my biggest issue in the finale lies, the fact that she's a clone/made from Scrooge's DNA and is technically his "daughter". Not everybody has to be related to Scrooge McDuck to be great, in fact doing this to her actually ruins Webby's character. Her trope is "found family," not "I'm secretly part of the family this whole time and not even I knew it" and this fucks with it so badly. This show is about family, and all different kinds of it. Being taken care of by your uncles/aunts instead of your parents but still having a good relationship, some kids don't have parents and they're gone for whatever reason, being loved and accepted by other family members, some families are awful and abusive, hell some families have two same sex/gendered parents with a kid who's def adopted and one might've been adopted or been from a previous relationship, and it's also how sometimes we find people to call family because we found them and they found us. Webby was the one to fill in the finding those to find family alongside her grandma, but I feel like they're disregarding that just to have a huge plot twist. Again aside from Beakley keeping secrets from Webby, there was no foreshadowing and it makes a previous episode from season two (Nightmare on Killmotor Hill) seem kinda creepy in hindsight since she's over here wanting to be Scrooge himself, and creepy overall due to how obsessive she was over the whole McDuck family in general. You could say it's foreshadowing this whole time, since some people might actually be like this before realizing that "oh hey I'm actually related to this person" due to someone being adopted, given to someone else to take care of, divorce and each parent keeps one of the kids and they don't meet again until way later in life, which in a way is a fair point but at the same time not everyone's gonna notice this even when they look back at the previous episodes. If you're gonna do foreshadowing and a plot twist, you have to do it where looking back everyone can notice little details, not just a certain group of people, and you gotta make sure it's good. Every plot twist has it's foreshadowings, and every good one has a good amount for people to take a guess. Every bad plot twist, however, is either forced in just to shock the viewers or has shitty foreshadowing that's either extremely little or none. I will make a comparison between this and Steven Universe (which if you're still watching or haven't touched yet but haven't gotten up to season five, please skip this part to avoid spoilers for the show) because in Steven Universe, there were PLENTY of hints and foreshadowing that Rose Quartz was actually Pink Diamond and it was even a theory too that Rose was actually Pink, alongside a theory that Pearl was actually the one to shatter Pink Diamond and not Rose which ended up being true in a way that both fits. This was a good plot twist that everyone can watch the show from start to end once again and notice every little bits of details that led up to that plot twist reveal. (End of SU spoilers) This, however, isn't a good plot twist. It's a terrible one and, again, forced in, messy, and there's not enough foreshadowing that can be used to be like "oh I kinda saw that coming" or "oh shit!" and think it's a genuinely good twist. Also the fact that Webby called Scrooge "Dad" T W I C E in the finale, it doesn't sound right, I even voiced out loud that OH EW THAT DOESN'T FEEL RIGHT WHY ARE YOU CALLING HIM DAD THIS IS GROSS STOP IT LIKE JUST CALL HIM UNCLE SCROOGE LIKE YOU'VE ALWAYS DONE- Oh and this is meant to be a throwback to that Ottoman Empire finale foreshadowing thing from earlier btw lol The last few things I can note about this is the fight between Scrooge and Bradford, where the latter reveals that he was the one to tell Della about the Spear of Selene (which pisses Scrooge off so damn BADLY and it's the other thing I can accept from the finale, it seems like Bradford to do that shit), and the fact that Donald almost died for fucking good due to Bradford pushing his ass into a machine that can erase anything and everything from existence when put in there. He did so with his minions, so he has no qualms about doing so to Scrooge's family unless he signed the papyrus as a contract. Not that it worked anyways, since "family is the greatest adventure of all" which Bradford didn't understand one bit lol But the finale? Not good, the show deserved so much better and Huey deserved way better because this was his season. What I would've done differently is mainly how Webby is a "clone" or whatever you want to call her. It makes no sense for all of her DNA to be from Scrooge McDuck, which raises way too many questions. Why not Beakley? Why not a warrior from F.O.W.L. with a mix of McDuck DNA? Why is Webby a girl while Scrooge isn't? You could argue that oh he might be a trans guy, which while I absolutely LOVE trans and nonbinary headcanons (due to the fact I'm a nonbinary woman myself), it just feels like a cheap escape goat of an excuse to explain that and Scrooge being trans because of that? Ehhhhhhhhhhhhh it doesn't feel right to me. If it was a combination of him and Beakley, then okay I'd get why she's like that, but it still has the problem of her being related to the family DNA-wise. Same with the clones honestly. Now what I would do differently is make it where she's a clone of someone (def not Scrooge) and make it where she has an identity-existential crisis. Who is she really? Is she this "April" character, or if she Webby like she's always known herself as her whole life? In the end, she accepts that she's herself, Webby Vanderquack, granddaughter of Bentina Beakley and an ally of Scrooge McDuck. May and June, on the other hand, are possibly failed attempts to recreate Webby, the perfect clone, in order to get the papyrus to appear which in of itself never stated it had to be a DIRECT heir to Scrooge McDuck (it just states that it requires an heir of Scrooge McDuck) like a daughter/son or whatever. You can go back to the episode "The First Adventure" to look at the papyrus if you want, but he wrote that it was to an HEIR not a descendant. It heavily supports how they changed a shit ton of things before the last season being this year instead of idk, try to make it better because they finished voicing the lines in January this year when they started doing season three around the time we got season two. Bradford gets frustrated, wondering how it couldn't have worked because HE HAS WEBBY RIGHT HERE. What he didn't realize was that it could've been someone within the family itself, one who's considered the smart one out of the bunch that wasn't Scrooge McDuck himself, someone who's also a fellow Junior Woodchuck. And that would be Hubert Duck, in which season three is meant to be his season. When he gets close, the papyrus appears but Bradford snatches it and runs off with it so he can finish up that contract he's spent FOREVER to make and force Scrooge to write his name there. As with May and June, I dunno what I would do with them, but if I rewrite the finale at some point (which I would be doing now with my mom, who watched the finale with me because we tend to watch stuff a lot, but I can't at the moment because I have a list of stuff to make and I can't afford to make it longer than it already is along with my WIP list) I'll figure out what to do with them. Overall, the finale is a 4 out of 10 for me. Not horrible enough for it to be the worst finale ever in the history of shows/series, but it's definitely got a lot of things that bothered me too much to genuinely enjoy it without getting stuck on something for too long. Again if you like it, good for you, but personally? It should've been much better and the series deserves a proper finale. If there's no surprise movie to make it better, then I'ma just pretend this finale doesn't exist like nah bye bitch dunno you lmao Besides with how messy this finale is, I hope you guys enjoyed reading my thoughts on it and I hope you guys have a great day

#DuckTales 2017 #DuckTales Reboot #Spoilers on the finale/The Last Adventure #Lil's Talks #Idk I just thought about it again and I'm just not that happy with it lol #Just put a lot of love and care into everything you work on guys #I'm up for discussion to see why you guys like it #just don't be a dick in the comments and reblogs please #That's all I ask for

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qvuki · 3 years

Text

sorry! this post became a bit long!

who am i? ➡

hey there! i’m qvuki, or you can call me vu. i’m 17. i go to a non-stationary upper secondary school (second year). i’m autistic. i’m a closeted lesbian (only out to 1 person irl lmao.) and extremely closeted nb (no one knows irl ). i use primarily they/them, but she/her works too (most of the time.).

i live in a shitty northern european country that’s hella homophobic, transphobic, racist and xenophobic. i’m not a native english speaker but my mother tongue language skills are even poorer.

because of my country being shitty that’s why my current wip has subtle hints for the Gays to understand these characters are lgbt+, and for Straights to leave me alone. it’s certainly not ideal but i’m not outing and risking myself for a story, lol.

what do i write? ➡

common themes: symbolism (flower language), PLATONIC soulmates, dynamic duo, bromance (best friends loving each other as best friends) best friends to enemies to lovers (whenever i decide to write romance that is), wlw romance (whenever i decide to write romance), loneliness, small towns, (im)mortality, complex morally grey characters, crime, mystery, supernatural/mythological beings, animal companions, lgbt+ characters ... (can’t really remember anything else lmao.)

current wip:

[unnamed as of 16/11/2020.] - planning (a very ROUGH idea)

a crime/mystery novella (?) with mythological creatures that takes place in a small town. (can’t really write a good synopsis if i have like 0.1% idea what’s going to happen lmao.)

themes (for certain): symbolism, dynamic duo, bromance, loneliness in a small town, being lgbt+ in a small town (very subtle), animal companions, crime, mystery, supernatural/mythological beings

note: this is for a mandatory thing in my country (for school). so my english teacher will be my main advisor. that’s why i’m making the lgbt+ hints subtle. </3

why did i make a writeblr? ➡

to help motivate me to finish my novella as well as make writer friends! i need me some writer friends. i love talking and listening to people about original characters! my asks and messages are always open to ramble about your characters/story! :)

also this is to help not lose my sanity by pretending my characters aren’t gay irl.

i think once i’ve kind of settled in and got more comfortable, i will be interested in joining discord servers. (not sure if i will make an alt for writeblr which will be a hassle, but then again i have bad trust issues lmao.)

i’m very open to following anyone; especially if they share some common themes with my stories. just reblog or like, and i’ll check your blog out! :D

#writeblr #new writeblr #writeblr intro #writeblr introduction #wtf do i tag this #not writing #about #god i havent been on tunglr for a while...#here goes nothing

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threecheersforinking · 4 years

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Manga Review: The Promised Neverland

The Promised Neverland manga finally ended this month! I watched the anime when it was airing last year, but a few days ago I ended up reading the entire manga in 3 days because of how fascinated I was with the world; I wanted to know how it would develop beyond the first season, but was way too impatient to wait for the second season to come out!

Because I read it so quickly I’m kind of feeling information overload right now and just want to get all my thoughts down as fast as I can. So obviously, this post is gonna have major manga spoilers. If you aren’t caught up or aren’t a manga reader, I suggest you stop reading now, but if you want to read my commentary on the anime’s first season (spoiler free!) here’s the link to that. Thanks!

Once I got past the first arc that was covered in season 1 of the anime, I was a bit nervous about what would follow. Something I worry about with series like this with a huge genre shift or huge unknown world/mystery is that the story won’t live up to what I imagine it will be. And while I wasn’t able to predict much about the world, I really liked how the story ended.

Overall, I enjoyed how they chose to end the story with all the cattle children going to the human world, and I’ll talk about that a bit later, but one gripe I had was that there were way too many loose ends for my liking. I prefer when all the loose details of a story get wrapped up at the end of a series (which explains why I didn’t like EVA lmao sry) and I still had a lot of questions at the end, some questions that I had since the first arc.

Firstly, what the fuck is the significance of the hydrangea? They did briefly explain that it’s used to show whether the gods will give you their blessing to eat something you killed or whatever, which is kinda nice but they didn’t explain what happens if it doesn’t bloom, or why it’s important... more knowledge of this world’s ‘gods’ or religion would’ve been cool.

I also feel like the way children were produced in Grace Field (or hell, any of the plantations) was unclear; like, where do they get sperm from, or was there another way they got the Moms pregnant? What about in the factory farms? Is Carol supposed to be Emma’s biological sister, because they obviously looked hella alike but they never even mentioned it?? I also wanted to know way more about the Moms’ schooling and how one becomes a Mom. I would love if there was a prequel short story or one-off focusing on Isabella in Mom-training.

Also, I think we could’ve seen more of Phil. He was without a doubt the 6th most important Grace Field kid (behind Emma, Norman, Ray, Don, and Gilda ofc), plus what happened when that scary guy interrogated him?? I straight up thought he killed him lol.

I also wish we had more background on Musica. There was no real explanation for her powers and she had hella Deus ex Machina vibes.

Despite all these unanswered questions I had, I still consider this series enjoyable and well written. I really don’t think knowing any of this stuff would’ve changed the way I thought about the story, and none of them would have really impacted the conclusion of the story itself.

And yes, I’m so glad it ended the way it did. Maybe some people weren’t expecting or wanting a ‘happy’ ending, but come on, don’t these kids deserve a fucking break??? And I don’t consider it unrealistically happy, either. These kids know what they’re doing, and they have a plan for everything. Emma is not naive, she is hopeful. Every time she tried to resolve an issue with positivity, kindness, and forgiveness, she was still prepared for her enemy to turn on her. That’s the only way she was able to convince cynical Ray and skeptical Norman to ever go along with anything she did.

I also loved that romance wasn’t really a thing in this story at all. Familial and platonic love are what kept the protagonists motivated more than anything else. I’m sure people have their ships, but personally I was just enjoying a series without any explicit romance.

Ray was my favorite character throughout the series, but I did kind of feel like his development was pushed aside in the later arcs. This def could’ve just been because his main development was in the first arc, but compared to Emma and Norman there wasn’t a lot of focus on my boy Ray. Yes he was by Emma’s side almost the entire time, but still.

I absolutely loved Isabella’s redemption. I can see why some people might not have liked it but i thought it was extremely fitting; every one of the Moms was once a cattle child, and they were just doing what they could to survive. This obviously does not justify their evil deeds, but it explains both their initial complicity and their willingness to change sides. And based on her reaction when Emma & friends escaped at the end of the first arc, I did suspect that if Isabella appeared again she would be on their side. I cried when her kids said they still loved her and she still loved them. It just reminds the readers of the innocence and unconditional love that children have.

While I do really love The Promised Neverland as a whole, my biggest qualm with this series was honestly the portrayal of Sister Krone... I immediately read her as being a racist stereotype. It’s a shame because upon her introduction I was actually really surprised and happy that they featured a Black person with natural hair. I didn’t mind her personality/character; in fact, I think she was a really nuanced antagonist for the first arc, but the way her facial features were exaggeratedly drawn made me uncomfortable. As an American, I’m familiar with how Black people have been portrayed negatively in our country’s media throughout history and it was just a little too close to that for my comfort.

I was concerned with how the manga would continue with racial portrayals after Krone’s death, but it did kind of seem like an isolated incident. There are kids with a variety of skin tones featured, in fact Emma mentions it in one of the first pages of the manga; not to mention, human races don’t really seem to be a concept in the demon world (presumably because race is irrelevant to the demons, who only care about brains). It is possible that the creators weren’t thinking this way at all, and just wanted to make her a scary adult; for instance, Isabella’s facial features are sometimes exaggerated for effect as well. But intentional or not, it made me uncomfortable, and I’m sure I’m not the only one.

Anyway, those are just my immediate thoughts after finishing the manga. Something I forgot to mention was that the illustration is absolutely hauntingly intricate. The demons in particular were wonderfully terrifying, and really helped me visualize their world. I’m really interested in how the anime series will continue to adapt the material; looking at the first season, the difference in art style between the two is slight, but noticeable. I’m especially curious about how they will handle the intense action and detail of the demon fight scenes later on. I also read this super fast like I mentioned and I definitely might have missed some stuff lol so if any of my ‘unanswered questions’ were actually mentioned and I’m just a big dummy please lmk. And if anyone has any other thoughts or comments I’d love to hear them!

Thanks for reading!

-threecheersforinking

#the promised neverland #Yakusoku no Neverland #the promised neverland spoilers #the promised neverland manga #manga #anime #tpn spoilers #tpn #ynn #manga review #anime review #anime review blog #norman #emma #ray #demons #manga review blog

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diaryofanangryasianguy · 4 years

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A comment I saw re the can collecting elderly Chinese man. "most racist shit is done by other people of color. MF keep giving them a pass because they are black." When are we going to address the anti-Asian sentiment in other groups of people that aren't white?

Exactly.

Like for me personally, I’m not about that allyship bullshit. I’m more about that people shit where I treat folks with respect regardless of who or what they are. Growing up with a lot of communities of color (mostly Asian communities though), I gotta say most of the racism I’ve experienced in my life has actually come from other individuals of color, particularly from Black and Latinos, but not actually from whites. This is why I don’t praise anyone just for being something because I already have the experience with some.

To be fair, yeah I’ve had plenty of racist experiences with whites and even from other Asian individuals too but the majority in my life, it has neither been from whites nor other Asian folks.

The dudes that you saw in that video, that’s exactly the type of behaviors that I and my folks have dealt with all throughout high school and even every now and then. Not saying they represent everybody because that’s a blanket statement and wouldn’t be true at all. But this isn’t to say that we didn’t have issues with people like that though.

Like this one Black dude was being hella racist to my friend right and he’s a really nice guy. My friend is the type that will drive hours to rescue someone or that you can call at 3am. My friend fucked up that racist dude, busted his nose and everything lol. Then there was this other time where this Latino dude was saying shit to our other friend and he sucker punched my friend. My dude fought back and fucked up the Latino dude and he never came back to school lol. Asian folks out here get bloody with their shit, you don’t even know lol

Thankfully for me though, I hadn’t had any violent racist incidents like these. I actually had some physical incidents too but nothing that I would count as really violent, no blood involved at least. Pretty close though and I’ve always been on the receiving end. I was never the one to talk shit or say some racist shit to someone at school because of their race or where they hung out at or who they hung out with.

I do have to remind folks that it’s very important that we don’t place blanket statements on anybody or any group though because that’s racist in itself. Plus, I’ve had so many great experiences with non-Asian folks that they FAR outweigh the negative ones. I’ve been treated like family many times before even though I’m Asian. But we do have to weed out those individuals that are racist or that do encourage racism against us, especially like in that video.

Honestly, if beating the fuck out of a racist is the answer to their racism, then that’s the answer folks gotta respond with. Like if an article came out tomorrow and those Black dudes in the video got their shit handed to them by some of the Asian residents, I wouldn’t care. That would be justice being served tbh.

Angry Asian Guy

#anon #ask #long reads #tw sensitive material

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thebeaconbrown · 4 years

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My feelings on the Q-slur debate (and a bit on the N-word)

Me remembering all the times lgbtqia+ terminology was used as an insult or slur: warning for a bunch of mean words below the cut line *really hope I used that thing correctly lol*

"Nigga you gay"

"You a fucking faggot or something?"

"dyke ass bitch"

"she one of them butch bitches"

"He was a transexual/tranny"

These are things I’ve heard said about people (and now that I think about it, about myself-haha) during my 30 years on this here earth. Never have I heard queer used as a slur until the last few years on tumblr. And I never actually saw it used as a slur-just saw people saying over and over “queer is a slur”

Queer is the term that I chose to use because it is vague enough to include everyone and it’s what’s used in academics when discussing non straight/cis people.

There’s lots of people with bigger stakes in this than me that have put their opinions out there, and I don’t even feel like I should say much sense I’m in a straight passing relationship.

But I’m not straight, and neither is my partner. I identify as queer or bi. But more and more I’m preferring queer because it says enough. It says I’m a part of the community, and that I accept all parts of that community. It’s a term that I don’t have to worry about not forgetting to include a letter or symbol for when discussing the topic with others, and frankly I like that it’s short and sweet cause a lot of sites have character limits and I’m already hella verbose haha.

Anyway, what I’m saying is, everyone has different experiences with slurs and stuff. But that doesn’t give us the right to police the vocabulary people chose to identify themselves with.

I get people all the time saying Nigga is a word of oppression, you can never take the racist history from i so no one should be allowed to say it, yadda yadda.

And I do understand those viewpoints. I know it will forever have this negative connotation to it, especially in the US.

But it’s my word to reclaim and use as I see fit. Because I’m black, nigga. And white and nonblack poc don’t get a free pass to use it without consequence, but you know who does? This nigga. And I won’t lie and say I don’t get any satisfaction out of throwing the word around in front of them just because I can. I’m aware of the whole issue with people trying to say the word is usable by different races now because of the hard work niggas put into making it a friendly word between us. And I’ll be here to help verbally flay any nonblack person that thinks they can fix they mouth to say nigga. But I’m not gonna stop a nigga from using nigga. I don’t have that right. Niggas got too few rights already, now they can’t even say ‘what’s up my nigga’ in peace? Come on now.

I’ve got a black friend who hates the word-I take that into account when I speak with them, and I try to refrain from using the slur when talking to them, but I’m not gonna beat myself up over it when I slip up.

So back to using queer. I likes it, I think it’s a good word for everyone to use, not just queer people. It’s not a word that is at the point where it’s offensive for nonmembers to use it. Quite the opposite, it’s a good, safe word to use to talk about the community as a whole without singling out any particular group over another.

#slurs #homophobic language #queerphobic language #the n word #the n slur #queer tings

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aelinbitch-archive · 5 years

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You've probably said this before but what's your favorite aspect of the TOG series? I've only read like ten pages of the first book lol

aaaaa thank u for asking!! this sort of leads into something i’ve been meaning to talk about for a while so i hope you’re prepared for An Essay No One Wanted By Me. anyway this is a two-part answer, read below:

1. Aelin. Celaena. The main bitch, whatever you wanna call her lol. Without her I probably wouldn’t have cared about the series at all and wouldn’t currently be trapped in ToG tumblr hell reluctantly stanning a racist and homophobic series, but unfortunately when I was like twelve years old or whatever and read the first book I literally imprinted on Celaena like a baby duckling. To the extent that she became, like, the default avatar for all my maladaptive daydreaming and If I Don’t Project On Her At All Times I Will Die. It’s not like she’s the only thing I like about the series (I loooove a lot of the other characters, especially the gals, and the writing can be really great and engaging and cinematic) but Aelin has always been the supermassive black hole at the center of it all for me. I wouldn’t know how to even begin untangling her character from my psyche at this point. It’s honestly a little disturbing. Anyway.

2. Part two is a quality of the series that I feel was unprecedented in its strength in the first five books of the series (ToG-QoS plus the prequel novellas) and really really disappointingly weak in the last two books (EoS-KoA). Like I said above, Aelin has always been my main interest in tog so I read and enjoyed the last two anyway, but I definitely felt the loss of this - “this” being the detail and attention paid to all different types of relationships between characters, and how rich and unpredictable those relationships were as a result.

That sounds like kind of a broad, vague thing, but what I mean is that (in my opinion) rarely are romances and friendships and rivalries explored with such nuance, complexity, drama, and realism in most YA as they are in ToG. I remember reading Cassandra Clare’s books (lmao.) as a pre teen and loving those as well, but totally being able to predict who was going to end up with who, and finding the character dynamics to be pretty cut and dry.

In ToG that’s not the case at all. Like, you’ve got Celaena and Sam, a really complex example of enemies to lovers to….. Tragically Dead Boyfriend Whose Demise Fuels My Guilt and Self-Hatred For Seven More Books, Lysandra and Aelin, two girls pitted against each other by their abuser who team up a year later to unlearn their internalized misogyny and kill him, and Aelin and Chaol, who… how do I even describe the ups and downs (and downs. and more downs) of their relationship.

And that’s just three pairs! Pull the names of two characters out of a hat and I can almost guarantee essays worth of material could be written about them. Arobynn and Aelin? Aelin and Nehemia? Chaol and Dorian, as much as I hate both of them and feel that their relationship as been widely mischaracterized? All fascinating!!! No two people in those first few books are just friends, or just lovers, or just enemies. It’s always more complex, there’s always a history or tension or competing agendas or viewpoints that Fuck Shit Up.

And benefit of that is twofold: one, everything that happens between the characters just…. lands so well. The betrayals and triumphs and losses and victories of The Assassin’s Blade and Crown of Midnight and Queen of Shadows (especially TAB) are fucking heart-stopping. It’s great character-driven entertainment!! Gripping and engaging and vivid to the point of being painful.

And two, there’s no way to predict where a relationship is going to go. Aelin and Lysandra teaming up in QoS instead of returning to their rivalry? Who would have thought! Ansel and Celaena’s summer fling (they were in love. fight me.) ending like That? Holy fuck. Nesryn and Chaol breaking up in ToD? Oh shit! I fell for it again! Rowan and Aelin ending up together after everyone swore they were brotp in HoF? Hell yeah! Chaolaena seeming like endgame and then ending forever, with Chaol and Aelin realizing that the rift between them that began in CoM was something that would never sufficiently heal? Unprecedented. Fucking badass for a YA book to curve everyone like that. Tween me was shook out of her mind.

(Important to note, though, that the downside of this style was that SJM couldn’t tell where ~unpredictable relationships and characters~ ended and fridging began, and as a result, not one but two woc were killed off to make white characters sad and it sucked beyond belief).

Aaaaaand then QoS, the peak of literature, turned into EoS, and SJM just… gave up on all of that. I remember the first time Dorian and Manon met, and I was like oh, okay. So they’re going to end up together. And I was right. I remember that on this site, before EoS came out, before Lorcan and Elide ever fucking MET, people predicted the existence of Elorcan!! And they were right!! Like how fucking boring? Everyone is just paired off into completely predictable heterosexual ships and those are now the only relationships we get to read about (with a few exceptions, like Aelin/Aedion, Aelin/Fenrys, etc.).

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: my least favorite thing about Manorian is not that I find the relationship to be shitty (although I do, I really do). It’s that Dorian is suddenly the only character Manon gets to interact with in any meaningful way.

Like, are you kidding?! I want to read about Manon and Elide, Manon and Asterin, Rowan and Lorcan, Aelin and Lysandra, Aelin and Nesyrn, even if it’s not romantically (although some of them, like Manon and Elide, absolutely should have been, and the fact that not only was that ship very thoroughly sunk, but also they didn’t even get to TALK after QoS, felt like a real slap in the face to gay fans, but I digress), because those pairings previously had hella complexity and drama. But we don’t get to.

And this trend that’s so painfully present in the last two books Sucks for two reasons: one, every relationship that isn’t romantic (which were previously some of the most interesting ones) is abandoned so that more time can be made for The Hets™ and two, the relationships that are romantic, now the only ones left, are totally fucking boring and predictable!! If two characters are interacting at any point (if one is male and the other is female, of course) then you know for a fact that they’re not only love interests, but endgame.

And that makes me not care even when there is drama between them. Elide giving Lorcan the cold-shoulder for three hundred pages, and Manon and Dorian arguing, and Aedion being cruel to Lysandra weren’t compelling narratives to me like they should have been, because the whole time I was just thinking “but it doesn’t matter. I know it’s still endgame. There are no stakes here whatsoever; it’s a done deal.” Whereas Chaol and Celaena’s devestating breakup in CoM felt like (and was) suuuuper Real. An all-in bet on the wrong person. Crazy shit.

And not that I think two characters should never have a happy ending together (I really like rowaelin and nestaq and I would have loved malide!) but imagine how much cooler and subversive and entertaining it would have been if Elorcan, which seemed soooo totally cute and endgamey and borderline like fanfiction throughout all of EoS just ended forever right there and then on the beach, with Elide turning to Lorcan and saying “I hope you spend the rest of your miserable, immortal life suffering. I hope you spend it alone. I hope you live with regret and guilt in your heart and never find a way to endure it” - and BAM. She never speaks to him again. He’s dead to her.

I mean, talk about shock value! (See, Sarah, you can have shock value without killing of a person of color to make a white character sad 🙃). And I totally get that relational twists like that alienate fans more than just going the expected route and having them kiss and make-up does (I mean, the ending of Chaolaena in QoS certainly did, Jesus Christ) but I, Bella aelinbitch, personally live for that shit, and isn’t it only fair that all media cater directly and specifically to me? Lmao. But seriously, I do think it’s objectively more interesting, and that it keeps readers on their toes (I was on my ASS in EoS and KoA. Like. I was flat on my back sinking into the Earth).

And there are still sort of… glimmers of the old way she wrote in the first few books, but it just feels like a tease rather than something that’s really explored and indulged in the way it was before, and it just ends up being more frustrating (like what was the point of Manon and Dorian not getting married at the end of KoA if I would bet my life savings that in World of Tog it’ll be confirmed that they’re either married or still together) and sometimes downright problematic? Like to return to a previous example, I think all the drama between Aedion + Lysandra was a result of Sarah’s previous (good) instincts to shake stuff up and complicate the character dynamics, but it backfires because when they end up together, it’s not ever… worked out? Or addressed? If you create really intense drama between two people, then that needs to show up in their relationship, no matter how happy they end up together. It doesn’t just disappear.

And despite the fact that her understanding of that concept (that shit between two people doesn’t just disappear like magic) is one of my absolute favorite things about the first few books, Sarah even went as far as to use the last two books to retcon some of the original complexity away, which makes me want to rip out my hair!! Like Aelin at the end of KoA just going “Love you Chaol and Love you Dorian xoxoxoxoxox best friends forever!!!” instead of having, like, any type of mixed feelings about the way these boys treated her? I mean, come on! 100 pages earlier Chaol was openly saying she should die instead of Dorian! Why is everything just peachy-keen instead of fraught with tension!! (I know why. I know. It’s because she introduced way too many characters/POVs/storylines as the series went on and didn’t know what to do with them all besides sideline the nonromantic ones and pair off everyone else boy-girl boy-girl down the line). Or if it has to be peachy-keen, why is the peachy-keeness never critically examined as, perhaps, a repressive mechanism for Aelin to avoid dealing with painful truths from her past? Now that would be interesting.

(My ideal World of ToG would be just a transcript of the characters’ therapy sessions where Aelin realizes that her insistence that “Chaol and Dorian Are Her Friends!” is actually a way to keep herself safe emotionally and that she has plenty of reasons to hate them, and Lysandra realizes she should divorce Aedion lmao).

Anyway tldr: The variety, complexity, depth, and unpredictability of the relationships in Throne of Glass was simultaneously the most realistic (sometimes relationships of all kinds fall apart or veer off in unexpected directions and love is temporary and the boy you met in the first chapter isn’t actually your soulmate and it doesn’t mean he’s a villain) and the most gripping and dramatic (I would have been totally chill if maeve and erawan weren’t a thing and tog was just like a medieval soap opera, that’s how entertaining the character dynamics were) thing about the series, and to lose that in the last two books because of Heterosexuality (and introducing too many POVs and not knowing what to do with them all)…. kinda devastating.

This ended up being waaaaaay more complaining than it was talking about what I loved, but the only reason it bothers me so much is because it used to be so good!!! So just imagine the inverse of all the frustration I just vomited into this ask and you’ll have a good idea of how much I loved the series when things weren’t this way.

#im SO sorry for how shittily worded/ranty/emotional/long this is but *antoni from queer eye voice* a shitty YA series is actually something #that can be so personal...#greatest hits: hot takes

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nicol3houghts · 5 years

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STOP WATCHING THE OFFICE: other things to watch this summer

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE ZIE OFFICE!! But as much as it pains me to say, the office isn’t a personality trait, so I’ve decided to make a list (e.g. Buzzfeed lists) of my top 16 recommendations for TV and podcasts to watch and listen to—since we all need to stop being basic bitches and FOCUS!

I hope you listen to me when I say these shows are amazing and actually watch them if you have the time. I'm doing this because I care about you and your TV preferences.

I'll break it up by streaming service, starting with Netflix then Hulu, YouTube, then Podcasts last.

*I apologize in advance for the lousy grammar and lack of editing, but also not really sorry bout it.

-----------------------------------------

On NETFLIX:

1. Arrested Development

Number of Seasons: 5

Number of Episodes: 91

Hours to Binge: 35

Okay, number one on my list is Arrested development. A lot of people I talk to, especially in my age range, don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about, but this show is GENIUS... on G*D. I’ve watched it around four times now, and each time it gets better and better. I read somewhere that it was created as a satire of Bush-era incompetence and idiotic hanky-panky during the Iraq war. But at its heart, the show’s about a rich family with four adult children—who are all goofy and quirky. Their dad get’s thrown in jail for doing business with terrorists or something like that and Micheal Bluth (Jason Bateman) has to get them out of weird ass situations.

youtube

Above is one of my favorite scenes (Best clip I could find on youtube!!).

This show has a LOT of jokes and long running bits that you kind of have to pay attention to to get the storyline. It’s hella META, and at times, can be really weird (see George Micheal Bluth and Maeby Fünke’s little Les Cousins Dangereux). In conclusion, however, Jason Bateman is hot, Micheal Cera is hot, and Tony Hale is ~super~ hot.

P.S. a lot of memes come from this show that you would know but don’t know that it’s from this show.

2. The Haunting of Hill House

Number of Seasons: 1

Number of Episodes: 10

Hours to binge: 9

youtube

Scary as f*ck! Do not watch yourself or u will die. I warned you.

I'm not going to spoil it too much, but it's about a family living in a spooky house and crazy ass shit keeps happening to them. They eventually move out, but even 20 years after--when the kids are all adults--the haunting of the house follows them.

There's even a 17 min scene that they shot in one shot!!!!!!!! That's wiLD.

3. Schitt's Creek

Number of Seasons: 5

Number of Episodes: 66

Hours to binge: 25

Yet another show about a rich family loosing all their money. A bit different than Arrested Development. This show is about a rich ass family loosing all their money and resorting to live in Schitt's Creek--a town in Nowhere, U.S.A. the family bought as a JOKE. It's a really easy watch. The characters in this show are SO un-relatable and mean it's hilarious--only if u f*ck wit dry humor tho.

Here's my favorite character, Alexis Rose just being iconic:

youtube

Give it a try, the first few episodes are rocky, but it gets better. That's a guarantee.

4. American Vandal

Number of Seasons: 2

Number of Episodes: 16

Hours to binge: 9

A lot of people already probs watch this show, but it's honestly so beautifully written. The show is an homage to Making a Murderer, a true crime mockumentary of sorts. It follows two guys, Sam and Peter as they try to figure out a mystery: WHO DREW D*CKS ON THE TEACHER'S CARS?

Also, JIMMY TATRO!!!!!

Season 2 follows a different crime and it's... it's poopy.

5. Mindhunter

Number of Seasons: 1

Number of Episodes: 10

Hours to binge: 9

YUH. Just started this, already on ep. 8, very interesting. Mindhunter is about the first FBI agents to use profiling to catch serial killers. THE CHARACTERS IN THIS SHOW WALKED SO THAT HOTCH AND REID COULD RUN.

This show is no joke and based on true serial killers like the coed killer, the shoe fetish killer, and BTK, it's very.... very creepy.

ALWAYS carry pepper spray on ya, that's fer sher.

6. Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

pinot noir, caviar

7. John Mulaney: The Comeback Kid

eat ass, suck a dick, and sell drugs

8. The Good Place

is it really the good place?

---------------------------------------------

On Hulu:

9. Broad City

Number of Seasons: 5

Number of Episodes: 50

Hours to binge: 18

One of the greatest television series of all time about two baller best fraaands who get into the schemes of the century in New York City. Illana, a ferocious kween wit ZERO f*cks, and Abbi, an aspiring artiste with a great ass. The two work min-wage jobs in NYC (so they're broke) and they're just trying to find luv and a good bacon egg and cheese.

Think Sex and the City but fresh and new and wild. Abbi and Ilana's dialogue and schemes are relatable af, it makes it seem like you're there with them. Their co-dependency is so powerful... yet at moments, a lil destructive. I once had a friendship like this.. and let me tell you... co-dependency is a wild ride.

youtube

Some of the funniest scenes in this show is just of them talking on the street. Sometimes, when I'm walking with my friends, I pretend like I'm in the show lol.

I recommend you start from beginning to end because of the endless callbacks and running gags, but if not start with season 3, episode 7 B&B-NYC. Blake Griffin is in it.

10. Community

Number of Seasons: 6

Number of Episodes: 110

Hours to binge: 41

What can I say about this show to make you watch it? Well first of all the fact that Childish Gambino (Donald Glover) is in it should already have you clicking over to Hulu by now.

Community is about seven quirky misfits: a disbarred lawyer, a failed housewife, an activist everyone hates, a racist old man, a stupid jock who lost his sports scholarship, a high-strung know-it-all who took too much adderall, and abed. They all end up at Greendale Community College with a phsyco spanish teacher and a colorful dean.

This show is kind of a parody of a sitcom, and it is VERY meta--often referring to themselves as TV show characters. The seven get into hilarious adventures and obstacles along the way. The show also genre hops from time to time. For example, they have a whole pillow fort vs. blanket fort episode (Pillows and Blankets, season 3, episode 4) in a Ken Burns documentary style, an episode in claymation for Christmas (Abed's Uncontrollable Christmas, season 2, episode 11), and a bunch of paintball episodes in style of Quentin Tarantino and StarWars.

Again, you should start at the beginning, but if you want to get into it quickly, I really loved Pillows and Blankets (season 3, episode 4).

11. The Mindy Project

As a "petite asian woman" who is not petite, this show is very relatable. About finding love and eating good in the big apple.

P.S. If you don't like Kelly from the office, you're dead 2 m3.

12. Brooklyn 99

Cool. coolcoolcoolcool. Jake Peralta is the greatest detective/genius.

13. Superstore

If Walmart and the office had a baby and it was incompetent.

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On YouTube and Facebook Watch:

14. The Real Bros of Simi Valley

Number of Seasons: 2

Number of Episodes: 14

Hours to binge: 4

You straight up know these guys, fool. Four stoner/burn-outs who think your hometown's Mexican food is the best in the world. Amazingly written and surprisingly good acting. Lightweight lowkey thought they were speaking another language at first.

Jimmy Tatro, Cody Ko, Getter, and Nick Colletti. What more do you want? LITERALLY WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?

The unnecessary drama and endless quotable jokes in this show leads you wanting more with only 14 episodes totaling at around four hours.

Watch the first season YouTube here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybcPQVipNAw

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Podcasts:

15. Tiny Meat Gang

Aha hah bro last night was a movie bro ON GOD.

Noel Miller and Cody Ko talk about literally anything, but goofy. I can listen to them talk for straight up hours.

I usually listen on Apple Podcasts, but you can also watch on YouTube:

https://youtu.be/ZCMs4FrC_c0

Just start listening, bro.

16. My Favorite Murder

No shade to Codel, but My Favorite Murder is my all time favorite podcast. Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark are two hilarious women who love murder. Not murdering, but the psychology of murderers and survivors. Each Thursdays each of them tell a story about a murder. They don't make fun of murders, but it's their banter that makes it fun to listen to.

If you're a fan of true crime at all, please listen so I have more people to talk about it with. shouts outs Jenna for putting me on to the show!

Here are my favorite episodes!

*tip: skip the first 15-20 min to the first murder when first listening.

150: How Dare You Kill Kelli

The Hanging of Alice Riley and The Murder of Reyena Marroquin

131: The Uninhibited

The Murder of Standford White and The Case of the Boys on the Tracks

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