#(for context Birds is an abbreviation for a fic)

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

In the road rn (when will it end) and I took the time to write down what I want/need to do as soon as I get home. But then I took a look at how insane the list ended up and I need to show you for whiplash purposes alone

Sums up who I am as a person tbh

[artistmarchalius]

Cockney Rhyming Slang Phrases Part 1

Part 2

In a previous post I went into Cockney rhyming slang history and gave some tips on how to use it.

In this post I’ll give you some commonly used Cockney rhyming slang phrases, phrases that I find funny, as well as some phrases that I think would be useful for Spider-Verse fic writers specifically.

So let’s get started!

A-B

Adam and Eve - Believe

E.g. “I don’t Adam and Eve it!”

Apples and Pears - Stairs

E.g. “He fell down the apples.”

Aunt Joanna - Piano

E.g. “Play me a song on the old Joanna!” Or “Get on the Joanna and we’ll have a sing song!”

Barnet Fair - Hair

E.g. “How do I fit my barnet under my mask? Wouldn’t you like to know.”

This is a very common Cockney phrase; you’ll hear a lot of true Cockneys talking about getting their barnet done.

Barney Rubble - Trouble

E.g. “Looks like someone’s lookin’ for a Barney!”

Bread and Honey - Money

E.g. “I ain’t got enough bread for that.”

Bird Lime - Time (in prison)

E.g. “He’s doin’ bird.”

Bird lime is a sticky substance you spread on trees to catch birds (now illegal, thankfully). You can understand why people relate it to feeling trapped.

Boat Race - Face

E.g. “He’s got a handsome boat!” Or “Shut your boat!” Or “I’m not just gonna show you my boat race, mate. Secret identity and all that.”

Bottle and Glass

I’m going to let you figure this one out.

E.g. “Look at the bottle on that guy!” Or “I slipped on the steps and went bottle over tit!”

Brass Tacks - Facts

E.g. “Let’s get down to brass tacks!”*

*Some people think that this phrase originates from the Cockney rhyming slang, however others say that it is referring to brass tacks used in upholstery or tacks that were hammered into sales counters to indicate measuring points. I don’t have the answer.

Brown Bread - Dead

E.g. “He’s brown bread!”

This is an example of a Cockney rhyming slang phrase that you don’t abbreviate. You always say “brown bread” and never just “brown”.

Bubble Bath - Laugh

E.g. “Are you having a bubble?”

This is meant more in an irritated sense rather than joyful laughter, like saying “You must be joking!” Or “Are you having a laugh?”

Butchers Hook - Look

E.g. “Let’s have a butchers at that.” Or “Take a quick butchers at this!”

It’s good to keep in mind that there can be multiple Cockney rhyming slang phrases for the same word, as well as multiple Cockney rhyming slang phrases that start with the same word. For example, ‘Birds Nest” and “Bristol and West” both mean chest, and “Birds Nest” and “Bird Lime” both can be abbreviated to “Bird”. For the latter, context is important for knowing what someone is talking about.

As always, I’m not an expert; a true Cockney would know far more than I do. I just want to share the knowledge that I have. I hope that someone will find this helpful, informative, or entertaining at the very least.

I’ve got more Cockney rhyming slang phrases coming, but if there’s any other areas of British slang you’d like me to go into, let me know and I’ll see what I can do!

Happy writing and happy speaking!

My other British slang posts: Cockney Rhyming Slang, British Police Slang, Terms of Endearment, Innit VS In’t - a PSA

[duckprintspress]

For This Week's Blog Post: We Need YOU!

One of our long-term projects at Duck Prints Press - something we've been working on on-and-off for a while but haven't made public yet - is a Fandom Lexicon. There are a lot of websites and blog posts that include parts of a list of fandom-specific language, but we've not been able to find just a simple glossary, so we decided to put one together. (We're not saying such websites don't exist...they surely do...but we also wanted to do our own!)

There are many challenges in making such a list (one of the most obvious being what to include - how general a term is "too" general for inclusion?) but we've been doing our best, casting a wide net, and picking the collective brains of people involved in the Press.

And...we've basically exhausted our own knowledge/memories/ideas, which is where you, yes YOU, come in!

We want your terminology! What are fandom words you've encountered and said "wait, what does that mean?" What's old fandom slang you used to use that you don't see anymore and know that some newbie would be confused by? What are words you wish you could have found on a list when you first joined fandom?

We've already put together a list of 222 general fandom terms and abbreviations (some definitely "fandom specific," others more "internet general slang") and 29 fandom-specific abbreviations (this list is, obviously, much more nascent). You can see the entire list here. (note: there is citrusy terminology on this list, both literally the citrus scale is on there, but also things like A/B/O, BDSM, etc. - it's a lexicon, after all.)

Currently, we are looking for:

general fandom terms/online terms that would be confusing to people out of context; and

over-arching fandom abbreviations (e.g., MCYT = Minecraft Youtuber, but we don't want every single abbreviation for every sub-part of the fandom - just the level that if someone saw the abbreviation "in the wild" they'd have at least some frame of reference).

Long term, we'd love to do fandom-specific lexicons as well (NOT wikis, mind you, literally just "this abbreviation often means this" with links to resources that can give more information) but that's a much larger project that would require recruiting people with enough fandom-specific knowledge for each fandom, and is not our current aim, so please don't send us stuff like that.

Have you been in fandom a long time? Do you just HATE when people use the word "drabble" wrong? Have you got a list of words you wish fandom still used, or a list of newer terms you regularly look at and go "wait wtf does THAT one mean?"? Send us your words, so we can incorporate them into our list!

You can add a comment! Put your words in a reply! Add your words to the tags! Drop us an ask! However you feel like sending the words our way, go for it.

You can see everything currently on our list HERE. (reminder: lemon text at this link)

Or, here's our current ones (as of July 24th, 2022) under a read more. No definitions yet - we're not even at that stage, we're still gathering words! (And a third reminder: yes there are lemony fresh words below the read-more. No pictures or definitions but just. The words themselves.)

(read more)

General Fandom Terms (some of which are more just general internet lingo, it's a difficult line to draw - many of these have more notes in the linked gdoc so we definitely recommend you go there instead of relying solely on this list):

[Person’s] A+ Parenting

A/B/O

A/N

AITA

Alpha

Alpha Reader

Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics

AN

Angst

Anon

Anti

Anti-anti

AO3

AU

Avatar

AYRT

Baihe

Bashing

BB

BDSM

Beta

Beta Reader

BF

Big Bang

Bingo

Bird App

BL

Blorbo

BNF

Bottom

Britpick

BroTP

C&C

Camp NaNo

Canon

Canon Compliant

Canon Divergent

Canon Insert

Carrd

Casefic

Cisswap

Citrus

Citrus Scale

CNTW

Coda

Concrit

Consentacles

Cosplay

CP

Crack

Crackship

Crossover

CW

DA

Danmei

Dead Dove

DL:DR

DNI

DNW

DP

Drabble

Dubcon

DW

Eeby Deeby

Fanart

Fanfic

Fanfiction

Fanon

Fanzine

Fave

Femslash

Fest

FF.net

Fic

Ficlet

Filk

Fix-it

Flame

Fluff

Fujo

Fujoshi

Fusion

Gary Stu

Gen

Genderbend

Genderswap

GF

GIF

Glomp

Glub Shitto

Gong

Grapefruit

H/C

H/NC

HC

HEA

Headcanon

Hentai

HFN

Himbo

Horse Plinko

Incorrect [thing] Quotes

IRC

Isekai

Jossed

JPG

Jump the Shark

Kink Meme

Kink Tomato

Kripked

Lemon

Lik the bred

Lime

LJ

LRT

Lurker

Mary Sue

MC

MCD

Meme

Meta

MFL

Miette

Mini-Bang

ML

Monoshipper

Multishipper

NaNo or NaNoWriMo

Noncon

NoRomos

NoTP

NTA

OC

OFC

OG

OMC

Omega

OMG They Were Roommates

OP

Orange

OT3

Otaku

OTP

OTW

p4p

pfp

Plinko Horse

Plot bunny

Podfic

Polyshipper

Poor Little Meow Meow

Pro-shipper

PSA

PWP

QRT

Queerbaiting

Ravatar

RB

Reader Insert

Reblog

Remix

Repost

Reverse Bang

RPF

RPS

RT

Rule 63

S (followed by a number)

Schmoop

Scrunkly

Secret Masters

Self-insert

Selfcest

Seme

Sex Pollen

Ship

Shitpost

Shou

Slash

Smushname

Smut

Sockpuppet

Songfic

SPAG

Squee

Squick

Stan

Superhell

t4t

TBR

TERF

There Was Only One Bed

Tinhat

TL:DR

Top

TPTB

Troll

Trope

TVTropes

TW

Twincest

Uke

UST

WAFF

Wank

Whump

Wiki

WIP

Woobie/woobify

Wuxia

Xianxia

Y/N

Yaoi

Yeet

YKINMKATO

YMMV

YT

Zine

Our (VERY Preliminary) List of General/Overarching Fandom Abbreviations:

AD&D or D&D

ATLA

B5

BNHA

CQL

DMBJ

GDC

HNK

HOB

HP

JJK

JK or JKR

LoTR

MCU

MCYT

MDZS

MXTX

OFMD

OP

SNK

SPN

ST

ST: DS9

ST: TNG

SVSSS

SW

SW: TFA

TGCF

TLTR

[lunaviathan]

Hi I’m autistic and I frankly find it depressing to scroll through the autism tags and only find affirmations in spite of negative things or direction sheets for non autistic people so I’m going to talk about some genuinely positive things I can think of about being on the spectrum because although I appreciate both types of posts mentioned it gets very grating, anyway-

Starting off predictably, y’know the sound effect minecraft makes when you pick stuff up? And the rapid version it makes when you pick up a lot of stuff all at once? Yeah, it’s great and I want you to replay it in your mind for a bit because it’s amazing

Staying predictable, everything about the Endermen. The way they act and the sound effects except for the ominous scream one they make are both stimmy and autism coded so it’s two birds with one stone right there

Getting to have a nice long info-dump you didn’t know you needed until suddenly you’ve sent your friends three pages worth of information on the intricacies of the botw tools and ranking system at 1:00 AM with no prompting or context

Finding a Really Well Written fic with the focus on an autistic character being autistic (whether canon or headcanon’d) -and in that vein, finding a really long and detailed autism hc post that leaves you with more adopted hcs for your fave than you know what to do with

Getting to eat your favorite sensory food several times in a row chicken nuggies beloved

Finding something that makes for a really good improvised stim toy completely on accident, like a really nice scrap of fabric, or anything that makes a clicky-clacky noise or a holographic something

Figuring out a way to handle *insert social interaction here* that lets you engage in a way both you and the person your interacting with enjoy

Listening to your newest ‘loop song’ at a probably unhealthy volume for as long as you physically can and thoroughly enjoying every second of it

Noticing that you’re happy stimming and have been for a while and continuing to do so on purpose

Learning about an interesting topic and suddenly it’s four months later and it’s been consuming your every thought since then and finding a community of similarly obsessed people you get to talk about it with and having friends/family who know nothing of it that you get to info-dump to as well

Getting a dx (well researched self dx very much counted) and suddenly realizing you have an entire global spanning community of people who are like you and who get you and who want to help/make genuine connections with you (bonus points if you realize your friend group is also largely nerodivergent and you all just accidentally started orbiting each other purely on vibes)

Getting to indulge in your Spin (special interest, which is an abbreviation i will popularize) for several hours completely uninterrupted. Bonus points if you get to do in the general company of others so you’re also enjoying actually being in another person’s presence while doing/learning about something you love

Getting incredibly attached to a virtual animal (my giant botw horse named Gentle my beloved) and that virtual animal making it through the whole game with you

A media you forgot you loved suddenly getting a promising update for the first time in ages

Aaaand I can’t think of anything else but if anyone has any other experiences they’d like to share i would Love to hear about in the comments/tags whatever I don’t have any clue if this’ll even make it out of my realm of like three followers but I can dream

[onelastbreath-writes]

On Bruce And Texting:

Author’s Note: Hello and welcome, this is my first properly written fic, originally posted to my AO3, and now that I have finally created a writing blog, it’s here as well. Please enjoy!!  AO3.  Masterlist

Warnings: Hopefully none, its all cute and fluff <3

Summary: Bruce Wayne texts like he's sending correspondences to the Queen, so of course the little monsters he calls children just have to make fun of him! Brats, the lot of them, but he wouldn't have them any other way.

Features: Bruce Wayne/Selina Kyle, all the bats and birds, mentions JL, no crime fighting, only family fluff, jokes and nods to Millennial and GenZ shenanigans.

Word Count: 2.7k

---

Billionaire, genius, tech expert, father of many children, and all around up-to-date-with-just-about-everything type of person he may be, it is also a well-known Fact that Bruce Wayne, the Batman(TM) himself, can’t text to save his life.

Whether it’s due to his Very Proper English Upbringing, his inability to be informal via written correspondences of any type, his indifference, or the fact that it bothers his children so much, Bruce Wayne has not and never will text with anything less than perfect grammar, spelling, and formality. If he has not sent you a proper letter (featuring a dedication, indentation for every paragraph, signature, and post-script when applicable), he did, in fact, not send you that text. Informality is not his Batman Way(TM) according to his children... he’s not too sure what that even means, but it makes his young ones laugh so it’s probably fine?  

His oldest children (Richard and Jason) were raised in the time of Change, where computers, internet access, social media, and all things similar were only just being introduced into households en-masse. They were young enough to remember a time without such devices and connectivity (both for very different reasons, of course, but they grew up without the newest technology none-the-less). They could understand his relationship to the digital environment more so than his younger children, but they still tended to poke fun at his ‘texting blunders’ regularly. All his kids somehow ended up as brats. He doesn’t know how this happened. It’s certainly not his fault. He blames the League members, and especially Clark Kent, for their defiant personalities. 

His younger children, whom he loves dearly, like to confuse him as much as they possibly can with their slang, egregious spelling errors, and all-around ‘internet humour’. He doesn’t know what ‘wig’ or ‘worm’ or ‘oof’ or anything means. He has no idea what those dances are, or how they relate to the music that seems to always accompany them, and for the love of all that is good, don’t ask him what he thinks of this or that ‘meme’. What even is a ‘meme’, and should he be more concerned about his kids being obsessed with them? He tries, oh my god, does he try to follow the children’s conversations, but they somehow all learned a language he has no idea how to decrypt. His best response to them once they start speaking in tongues is as follows: smile but not too much, listen to child even though he is deeply confused, and pat child on head or shoulder when they are finished and are looking for assurance.  

He refuses to be a parent who ignores or tunes out his children, so he always makes sure to put down his work, his crossword, his tools, or whatever else is in his hands when a child searches him out for a conversation. But somehow, despite all the time he spends around them and their strange words, when he gets text from them comprised of abbreviations, acronyms, and completely random words, he goes a little cross eyed. He would never tell anyone, but he keeps a running list on his phone about the things they say that he has had to translate in the past. Spilling tea? Speaking the truth, usually to do with gossip. Wow? Multiple possible meanings: either a video game, or someone saying it (different pronunciation depending on context and who sent the text). Stickbug? A nice little prank with no ulterior motives, just for fun. Something along the lines of “this basic bitch Karen at the grocery store who is a dirty rat-licker and is def an anti-vaxxer just took 45 (forty-five) minutes to decide she didn’t actually want that almond milk. I Stan the cashier who had to put up with her. Rad af dude.” roughly translates to “A rude, middle-aged white woman who wasn’t wearing a mask and doesn’t believe in disease control or vaccinating her children wasted a great deal of an essential worker’s time in the checkout line. The cashier was very professional in their dealings with said customer and should be commended on their actions.”  

Given enough time, the internet for searching up new slang words, and occasionally some help from a friend (Alfred, Selina, Lucius, another of his children, etc), Bruce could decode and respond appropriately to most texts. He was quite proud of these achievements, and although he didn’t always like how often his children were on their phones or computers or gaming systems, he was quite proud of how integrated and easily they adapted to the ever-evolving world of electronics. All his kids were gifted in many ways, but their ability to learn, their hunger for knowledge, and their perseverance when exploring new and challenging ideas were always the things that he was most impressed by.  

He could do without their comments though. Yes, surprisingly, he did manage to get girlfriends with his type of texting. No, he doesn’t miss the ‘good old days’ when telegraphs were the main form of long-distance correspondence (how old do these brats think he is?!). And yes, he does know what a “tweet” is, and how to “post” on his social media accounts, and what “sliding into your DMs” is (thanks to a frantic search after a WE employee mentioned it near him). The Wayne children, truly whom and what Bruce considers his pride and joy, are cruel little jerks to him sometimes. His hoard of parenting books fails to mention what one should do when their children gang up on them. Bullying is covered of course, but he can’t really talk to a teacher or his guardian about how his second son calls him an idiot sandwich, or that his third son regularly tries to get him to do something “For The Vine”. His oldest and youngest boys are only slightly better in the bullying him department; Richard and his puppy dog eyes when he wants to do something dangerous or not-Alfred-approved, and Damian and his growing collection of pets because “Mother never let me have them, and I am deprived, and don’t you love me Father?”.  

His only good child is his beautiful daughter Cassandra, the flower of the Wayne clan. She gives him hugs, and pats his hands, and can sit with him and just enjoy the quiet and stillness when his other children are not around. Her language skills are improving by leaps and bounds every day, and her heart and spirit are unparalleled, but her main method of communication is in her movements. Her hands, her posture, her dancing; Bruce couldn’t think of a more graceful, fluid, powerful person if the world depended on it. His amazing little girl doesn't bully him (and if she ever does, he probably deserves it, he trusts her), so he turns to her most of all when it comes to communicating with someone else. She doesn’t let him send anything that is “sketchy” or “wrong words, bad meaning, Dad”. He would give the world to his children, but for Cassandra, he would destroy it and build her an entirely new one.

Social media, especially with his terrible children all having accounts dedicated to making him look like a simpleton, was another rocky terrain he had to navigate on the regular. He had professionals in place at WE to run the company’s many accounts, paid top dollar to help appeal and relate to the masses, but he mostly had to manage his personal accounts himself. And so, @TheRealBruceWayne was one of the greatest struggles in his adult life. Why can’t he just retweet every post from @WE_Offical and leave it at that? People should only want to know about what’s new with the company. What do you mean they want to know more about our family and private lives? That’s unnecessary, and not important to the running of the company, right? Right? Why are you laughing?!

Luckily, most people in his life aren’t so intimately aware of his struggles. He can act and lie all he wants about being “hip” and “woke” and whatever else the kids are saying these days when he’s with the JL or in board meeting intermissions, networking with his associates. The Batman knows all and sees all, Green Lantern, of course he understands how “Tiktok” works. The Batman is a robot without a funny bone in his body, Green Arrow, but I did witness him sigh and say “same” when he knocked his cup of coffee over while on monitor duty once. No matter how badly his darling children call him out, the Justice League would be so much worse. So, it’s one of his most importantly guarded secrets... even more so than his secret identity at this point. Being unmasked in front of every Gotham rogue would be less detrimental to him than his “friends” learning of his utter ineptitude in staying on top of the younger generations’ lingo.  

When questioned why the League doesn’t have a group chat or a forum or anything that they can use to contact each other outside of world ending matters and communicator (”because we’re friends, Batman! Ma and Pa Kent would love to have everyone over for a barbecue!”), the person who dared even mention texting isn’t even given a verbal response. They are just glared at, silently, often for several uninterrupted minutes, frozen in place only able to breathe shallowly in fear of setting off the Bat. “You know why” his glare says, “I’ll eat you, your family, and everything you have ever held dear” the younger members hear. No one makes the mistake of asking about it twice.  

Outside of his children and Alfred, and his small circle of true friends involved in all aspects of his life, there is only one more person Bruce allows to know of his Darkest Secret. Selina. Someone most people would recommend he not be involved with. Catwoman: accomplished thief, distraction, chaos-incarnate most nights, and his significant other. Sharp as a whip (ha) and crafty like no one’s business; he is head-over-heels. On again/Off again and all over the place their long romance has been, but no one has ever challenged him, intrigued him, like this clever, beautiful, amazing woman has. He’s brought his partners around his children before, both for their judgement, and for their worst behaviours to vet out any “unworthy” suitors. He trusts them explicitly to tell him the truth about those he allows into the manor; were they rude about Bruce wanting to have group outings, did they say something about Bruce’s money, did they get angry or shout or make anyone uncomfortable while they were here? If his children even looked slightly unhappy with someone he brought them to meet, that person would not be invited back. Children, he finds, have the best sight when meeting people; no motives other than finding safety and love, no fear of consequences from speaking honestly...  

Selina, or Catwoman, as they had known her first, was someone all of his kids liked without issue right off the bat. She would make puns and play word games with Richard, his first Robin, tiny, still working on his English, able to connect with him over their acrobatic abilities. His second Robin, Jason, skittish and feisty as an alley cat, knew of Catwoman and her daring escapades long before Bruce found him. The young boy had a few heroes, and no one (not even Wonder Woman) could compare to the incredible burglar who bought food and jackets and medicine for the street kids in Crime Alley. She was saintly in his eyes, and to this day, Bruce was still working on convincing Jason he was good enough for Selina. Tim and Cass and Stephanie (basically another daughter to Bruce, she spends so much time with the family) all joined the Wayne clan around the same time and officially met Selina as a friend and partner of his, and in the good graces of his first two sons. Selina, in all her nightly business, and many travels and acquaintances, had met the three independently, helping Tim get home safely back to Drake Manor when he escaped to photograph Batman and Robin in the dank darkness of Gotham when he was just a young boy, spending some time with Cassandra when her despicable father left her alone long enough to recover from his rough treatment, showing her the first scraps of kindness in her short life, and watching over and protecting Stephanie as she followed and sabotaged her father Cluemaster and his criminal activities. There was no need to win them over once they met her civilian identity, she had already gained their favour and acceptance, and they were happy to have her near their new family. Damian, his youngest, his biological son, took the longest to warm up to Selina. He would never fault his little boy for fighting so hard against a woman that was not his birth mother, especially after all the manipulation and cruelty dealt to him by Talia for the first decade of his life. But as he began to learn about his father, these people in his father’s life, and this woman that was Not His Mother but “still okay, I guess”, he grew to see her as acceptable. Her cats definitely helped, he’d say, no one with cats that loyal and happy can be a bad person.  

Selina, the love of his life, he’d admit quietly to himself, was also a dirty traitor and in cahoots with his terrible children. She would say his texting skills were “sweet” and “very gentlemanly” when she was asked by anyone outside the family, and privately to him she would say she thought they were “adorable” and “please don’t ever change, Bruce, I like it.” However, nothing seemed to bring her more joy than his children sending her texts and “Snaps” and “memes” about him to her. Sometimes it was screenshots of the family group chat that they forced him to join, where he would post “To whom it may concern...” and “In regards to...” when he needed to reach all his delinquents in a timely manner. Sometimes it was video clips of him staring at his phone intently, then typing something on his laptop, then him reading and nodding along, and then finally going back and responding to the text he received with a small, pleased smile. And sometimes, when he got too injured or was too incapacitated to text coherently, he’d have his nearest able child transcribe his text to her. Depending on who was texting her for Bruce, she could expect many different things. From Dick, she’d get lots of shorthand and silly emojis, and many, many, winky and crying/laughing faces in brackets depending on what Bruce had made him type. Jason, bless him, used proper English most of the time, but would never write a single word of Bruce’s soliloquy to her, instead she enjoyed the TL;DR version: “hurt again, missing you, come home soon, blah blah blah, sappy gross words here, love you”. Tim would allow speech recognition to run on Bruce’s phone, and just let it go until the man passed out. Stephanie, the little chaos child, would film it and send it to her, including all her muffled laughter and shaky camera shots of Bruce emoting with his available undamaged limbs. Cass, still more versed in physicality and emotive movement, would interpret Bruce’s text into mostly emojis, hearts and happy faces and animals, but would include photos, and phrases that she found important enough to type out for Selina. Damian, forever his Father’s son in any way possible, texts very formally, referring to her or his siblings Bruce mentions by last name only, and lots of “Father requests me to tell you...” and “Kyle, know that Father...”. She adores these kids, and once Bruce recovers enough to text her himself, or she gets back to the Manor, they get to laugh about whatever she was sent this time.  

So, while it’s true that Bruce couldn’t text his way out of a wet paper bag, and his kids are sometimes brats about it, there’s probably a lot of different reasons he doesn’t spend too much time trying to improve his skills. Whether it’s the smiles of his children, the giggles of his significant other, or the warm feeling in his chest when he sees all his important people bonding over him, well, in the end, who’s to say?

[itsladykit]

Sketch of Siren Cash that has way more vertebrae than needed. Thoughts?

---submitted by @justanotheroddball

O_O

Oh, man. I love him. He is gorgeous...which makes it really, really, really hard for me to reveal that Cash doesn’t have a mermaid tail. 

I’ve sort of been sitting on this information because, rather that doing a sudden description dump, I prefer to sprinkle bits and pieces of description slowly as a character is introduced. (Which wouldn’t be such a problem if I updated this fic collection more than once every month or so.) Unfortunately, I honestly forgot that sirens are generally assumed to be mermaids. Way, way back in the day, they were actually winged. 

One version of the legend goes that they were originally Persephone’s companions, turned into birds to help Demeter search for her when she was kidnapped by Hades. Their song was, once upon a time, supposed to be them calling for her to return. I believe the first written record of their appearance is in Homer’s Odyssey, where they attempt to lure Odysseus and his sailors with their song. (Fun fact: originally, they weren’t using sex as a lure, but instead, they were offering knowledge. I’ve always read that as implying that they’ll offer whatever the listener would most covet. They’re tempters in the classic sense.)

Over time, they became associated with mermaids, but...I really didn’t want to use that characterization here. Partly because I always knew that Cash would eventually be joining the hoard on land, and I needed him to have legs for that. You’ll hear a bit more about Cash in the upcoming update to Atypical, but I’ll list a bit of information about my sirens below the cut, for anyone who’s interested.

With all that said---I still love this design. The elaborate fins actually do reflect some of my own headcanons, and I am really fond of the abbreviated legs. It really gives the impression that these guys were once mammals or land creatures that slowly evolved to be better adapted to live in the ocean. Another headcanon that I’m going to make use of. So even if this particular design doesn’t really match what I’m going to use in the fic, I still absolutely adore it. This is wonderful and lovely, and I’m utterly blown away by the thought and detail that went into this design. Thank you so much for submitting this to me. I love it.

(MIld spoilers below the cut for Cash’s introduction to the hoard.)

So, a bit on my sirens:

Much like the drawing above, they have very elaborate fins. Betta fish are my main inspiration for this. Siren culture is based a lot on physical beauty, including the jewelry they use to decorate their bodies. Cash has very colorful and elaborate ectofins that line his spine, tail, forearms, and calves. These are primarily used as a threat display or as a mating display---it all really depends on context. They’d be similar to Betta fish in that these fins are not at all bony. 

Their legs are still full size, though both their hands and feet are webbed with ectoflesh. They do have tails, but these tails are not attached to their legs at all. These tails act like paddles as they swim, and their legs are primarily used during mating and when they venture onto land to attract prey.

I figure that these guys are actually amphibians. Given enough generations, I think the species would probably end up looking something like the drawing above---abbreviated legs, strong swimming tail, elaborate fins---but given their extraordinary longevity, their species is very slow to evolve.

The ectoflesh is also very important for maintaining buoyancy---similar to a swim bladder. Hollow portions of the ectoflesh can be filled or emptied of oxygen as needed, so that the siren doesn’t need to waste any extra energy trying to maintain neutral buoyancy. These swim bladders are usually located along the underside of the spine, the tail, forearms, and calves, all of which are encircled by ectoflesh. Of course, on land, the ectoflesh can be dismissed, leaving the siren looking almost human. Their long, heavy tail is bony, and cannot be fully dismissed.

Underwater, they are graceful and elegant---and vicious. On land, however, they are somewhat clumsy and uncoordinated due the the degradation of their inner ear over the generations. (The inner ear is critical in helping land-dwelling species maintain their balance, but it can hamper underwater species, given the difference between navigating an underwater and a terrestrial environment.) 

[world-without-authors]

The Vehicles of Wings of Canon: Planes

As you’ve like noticed, the current arc of The World Without Authors has a lot of focus on aerial dogfighting. As my fellow cowrite Aelit, my beta reader Doctorlit, and most of my readers (so pretty much everyone) aren’t much knowledgeable about fighter jets, I thought this is a good time to add some infos about the planes featured in the story so far.

I will mostly give some background info and add photos of real world examples for context (where applicable), as for the boring technical stats there’s always Wikipedia, that does a better job than I’ll ever do!

MCDONNELL DOUGLAS F-4E PHANTOM II

An USAF F-4E in the light grey air superiority livery, which as you can see from Chapter 1’s illustrations is actually different from the Strike Dove one. Johnson’s plane was likely mothballed while in this livery, but during Vietnam War service it likely had the SEA green and tan camouflage.

The F-4 Phantom II is an old third generation fighter jet from the Vietnam War era. Designed as an interceptor, it also saw use as a fighter-bomber. More than 5,000 were built in the real world, and it still being used by some countries though mostly in a reconnaissance role. (As it was sort-of-mentioned in the last chapter, Japan still had F-4EJ and RF-4EJs in service as of 2014, and they still have a few F-4EJ now though the last squadron is expected to switch to F-35s soon.)

While not exactly the best in class manoeuvrability-wise, it had an incredible amount of thrust for the time and was heavily armed, being able to carry up to eight missiles or a dozen bombs. Earlier version didn’t feature an internal cannon, but from the F-4E they were equipped with a M61 Vulcan 20mm rotary cannon in the “chin”.

Normally, a F-4 requires a pilot and a Radar Inteception Officer, but Johnson’s F-4E received an avionics upgrade while being restored to combat-ready condition including AIM-120 compatibility (which USAF Phantoms never carried AFAIK but some Greek F-4Es did) which, being an active radar homing missile instead of a semi-active one like the AIM-7 usually carried by the Phantoms, means that the single F-4E converted to Strike Dove specifications is combat-wise a single seat fighter, and as such the rear seat is mostly a passenger seat now. As a former USAF aircraft, its tail code followed their standards with just the alterations needed to denote it being a Strike Dove aircraft now. its full code is DV SD 14 364, which denotes an aircraft stationed at Strike Dove’s headquarters (DV, an abbreviation which AFAIK isn’t used by any USAF air base or carrier), owned by Strike Dove Inc. (SD), commissioned in 2014 (14) and its serial number ending in 364. For practical reasons, though, it is mostly referred as DV 364 or Phantom 364.

As of Chapter 4, it further received modification with parts from its Ace Combat equivalent, allowing it to carry the ridiculous amount of ordinance the series is known for.

NORTHROP F-5F TIGER II

A F-5F of the Swiss Air Force. While a bit lighter, the livery is very similar to Strike Dove’s one.

The F-5F Tiger II is a light fighter also from the Vietnam War era, though it didn’t serve during that war (earlier variants of the F-5 were deployed there instead) and, in fact, alongside the F-5E single seater version never saw combat with the USAF.

The F variant is the dual seater conversion trainer for the E variant, and as such it features flight controls for both occupants, usually a student pilot in front and an instructor in the back. As Johnson was planning to build up a fleet of F-5Es for Strike Dove, the single F-5F was meant to train new Strike Dove pilots on how to operate Tiger IIs.

All F-5 variants have a fairly limited ordinance carrying capacity, something slightly mitigated by the addition of wingtip rails for AIM-9 missiles in the E and F variants. On top of that, in order to make space for the avionics displaced by the second seat the the F-5F had to sacrifice one of the M39 20mm cannons and most of the ammo storage for the other, leaving it with only 140 rounds (and causing Sergio to run out of ammo in Chapter 2).

Like the Phantom, Strike Dove’s Tiger II received Ace Combat-verse pylons and equipment in Chapter 4 somewhat improving its capabilities, but after the rescue of Nikki and Razgriz Squadron it got relegated to second line as Strike Dove and its allies got hold of better aircraft.

The F-5F in Strike Dove service has tail code DV SD 14 027, usually abbreviated in DV 027.

GRUMMAN F-14A TOMCAT

A F-14A Tomcat. Even by today’s standards, it is a very sleek aircraft.

The F-14A Tomcat is a carrier-based interceptor fighter designed for the US Navy in the late 60s and early 70s. It had barely entered service by the end of the Vietnam War, with its first aerial kills coming only in later incidents.

The aircraft was in service in the US Navy and is apparently is still in service today in Iran. As the two countries are pretty much sworn enemies now, this led to the fact that all surviving US aircraft are in permanently non-flyable conditions in museums as the US armed forces went through the trouble of shredding everything else related to the aircraft to simply force the Iranians to run out of spare parts for theirs.

Kind of a shame, for such an iconic and good-looking aircraft, but luckily that’s not the case in the Ace Combat universe, where it is built by different manifacturers and is in service with… well, pretty much every single air force in that world really. The most notable users are Wardog Squadron and its successor Razgriz Squadron, pilots from which feature as part of the extended cast of The World Without Authors, and so four Tomcats are with Strike Dove and the Wolfram now: airframes KT 007, KT 024 and KT 221 from Razgriz Squadron (flown by Nagase, Grimm and Snow) and airframe NZ 016 from Wardog Squadron (technically Blaze’s, but now flown by Davenport)

Tomcats are two seater jets, with a pilot in front and a RIO in the back, but the games never mention Wardog or Razgriz RIOs (as, depending on player choice, they could be flying anything between a single seat fighter to a four seat EA-6B Prowler), so I skated the issue by having all of them coming from situations in which it could be acceptable for the rear seat to be unoccupied, even finding a way of filling the plothole of the poor sod in Davenport’s back seat not being mentioned at all during the Journey Home mission.

We can assume that by the time Razgriz Squadron becomes a Strike Dove unit their planes were either fitted with a way to use their weaponry without a RIO, only fitted with ordinance that didn’t require one, or some people from the Wolfram and/or survivors from the Kumaneko were hastly trained to be their RIOs. The Razgriz planes retained their tailcodes, but Davenport’s has been resprayed in Razgriz livery and the tailcode changed into KT 008.

One last note, the F-14 was the main inspiration for the VF-1 Valkyrie from the Macross series, which will likely feature in the future.

LOCKHEED MARTIN F-22A RAPTOR

An USAF F-22A. In the real world, Raptors are only fielded by the Unites States due to a strict sales ban to protect the aicraft’s classified parts.

The F-22A Raptor is the current air superiority fighter of the USAF. It is the first aircraft of this type to be designed from the ground up as a stealth aircraft, and as such can carry most of its ordinance in internal bays.

Sergio commandeered one for his own use during a PPC mission, which remained in Corolla’s possession after his retirement but, luckily for him, she brought it along during the Unravel. As Strike Dove doesn’t have any other aircraft of this design, the Raptor can be considered to be Sergio’s signature aircraft. Something that already led Belkan pilots to be wary of the “Raptor with the white bird on the tail”.

Sergio’s Raptor came from an Ace Combat badfic, and as such it is already equipped with whatever allows the Ace Combat aircraft to carry dozens of missiles. It was originally fielded in a badfic copy of Heierlark Air Base (called Hierlark Air Base in the fic), and as such carried tailcode HK 032. After the repaint mentioned in Chapter 7, however, it received Strike Dove tailcode DV 001. As it was officially commissioned in Strike Dove after the Unravel, while Strike Dove doesn’t have an actual headquarter and people come from different years, the airbase and year markers were dropped, with DV becoming the identification code for Skystreaker Squadron as a way to pay respect to the Strike Dove personnel lost in the Unravel.

FB-22C SILENT RAPTOR

Corolla’s FB-22C, still with it old PPC markings.

The FB-22C Silent Raptor is a stealth strike aircraft Corolla made by modyfying a FB-22 Strike Raptor she claimed for herself during the same mission in which Sergio obtained his F-22A.

In the real world, the FB-22 Strike Raptor, a delta-winged derivative of the F-22A proposed for the strike bomber role, never left the drawing board, but it has been produced in limited quantities in the Ace Combat universe. Corolla modified the design by removing the vertical tails and revising the other control surfaces to compensate, sacrificing stability for better speed and stealth. (What did you expect from her, really?) thus obtaining her one-of-a-kind custom she christened the FB-22C Silent Raptor.

Like the regular Raptor, the Silent Raptor carries its ordinance internally, with a bigger main weapons bay than the Raptor (the proposed Strike Raptor was to carry thirty Small Diameter Bombs compared to the Raptor’s eight) and has a distinct advanage in speed and stealth, making it the fastest of the aircraft currently owned by Strike Dove.

The Silent Raptor originally carried the spurious tailcode PACS-0, which in Corolla’s mind was “PPC Air Command Squadron Zero”, but said squadron doesn’t officially exist in PPC records. Upon Corolla’s official switch to Strike Dove the tailcode was replaced with DV 003, reflecting her callsign Skystreaker 3 and leaving an open space in the numeration to allow Ami (Skystreaker 2) to claim DV 002 for her own aircraft in the future.

MITSUBISHI F-15J EAGLE

A F-15J from the Japan Air Self Defence Force, the sole user of the design

The F-15J is a variant of the McDonnell Douglas F-15C built by Mitsubishi for the JASDF. It is currently Japan’s air superiority fighter.

A F-15J in disrepair and originally slated for scrapping, airframe number 018, was assigned to Nikki during her brief stint as a Spare Squadron pilot. After her rescue, the aircraft was put in storage as DV 018. The tailcode was given only as a way to refer to the particular airframe on the ground, as it was deemed beyond repair by Corolla. The cockpit area is being converted into a simulator, while the rest is being dismantled in the hope some of its parts are still in decent enough condition to be overhauled as spares for the other Eagles in Strike Dove service.

MCDONNELL DOUGLAS F-15S/MTD

The sole F-15 STOL/MTD, with the engine configuation as featured in the Ace Combat games. The real aircraft was eventually fitted with round 3D thrust vectoring nozzles.

The F-15S/MTD is a development variant of the F-15 Eagle fitted with canards and thrust vectoring nozzles. While only one was built in real life, in the Ace Combat universe the design saw service with the Osean and Belkan air forces. The design never went in full adoption, with fielded examples retaining the instrumentation probe of the test variant.

Having been converted from a conversion trainer F-15B in real life, I’m not sure what the backseaters of the F-15S/MTDs actually do in Ace Combat – the F-15C and J air superiority versions are single seaters, and the F-15S/MTD is more geared towards being an air superiority fighter too. I guess it could be for a Weapon System Officer for strike missions, as the F-15E does have a seat for a WSO in the back. However, most of the functions of a WSO are done by the AWACS aircraft in Ace Combat-style warfare, so I guess the backseat of Strike Dove’s Eagles will be empty more often than not.

It has improved maneverability over the regulat F-15 variants, making it a favourite of several ace squadrons, and also earning Nikki’s appreciation after Strike Dove captured several Belkan Air Force ones.

Strike Dove currently has eleven F-15S/MTDs, but plans are to convert as many of them as possible to F-15J+ Kai Eagle Plus specs. So far, the only one I’ve confirmed the tail code for is the one Ami flew in Chapter 7, DV 005.

F-15J KAI EAGLE PLUS

A really nicely made scale model of an Eagle Plus.

The F-15J Kai Eagle Plus is a fictional upgrade of the F-15J that featured in Patlabor. With its enlarged control surfaces and F-22A Raptor-style thrust vectoring nozzles, the Eagle Plus looks like an improved S/MTD and I decided to consider it as such. I really like its design, and I decided to use its obscurity as a way to give Strike Dove a distinctive fighter for at least part of the Unravel arc.

Strike Dove currently owns two, captured from a Belkan Air Force base that had in turn captured them somewhere else. One was partially dismantled by the Belkans for study and is being reassembled, while the other has been already pressed into service with tail code DV 006, and is the one Nikki flew in Chapter 7.

Corolla has plans to convert the F-15S/MTDs to Eagle Plus specs, though it won’t be a perfect conversion as the Eagle Plus is a single seater while the S/MTD is a two seater. It is likely that a F-15DJ Kai Eagle Plus conversion trainer existed in the Patlabor universe, but again as I don’t know if the rear seat of the S/MTD had controls in the Ace Combat universe so that might not be a correct designation for it either. I guess I’ll come up with something once the converted planes start rolling out…

SUKHOI SU-47 BERKUT

The Su-47 demonstrator during an air show.

The Su-47 Berkut is, like the F-15S/MTD, an aircraft built only for development purposed in the real world that has been adapted as a fighter in the Ace Combat games. Known for its distinctive forward-swept wings, as per its fictional depictions it is a very agile aircraft and among the favourites of Ashley “Grabacr” Bernitz, who flew it during the Belkan War.

Technically, his squadron should’ve been equpped with S-32s, a fictional variant based on earlier development designs, as they were the aircraft they flew in the last mission of Ace Combat 5. However, the S-32 is obscure even by Ace Combat standards, having featured only in that game and the ones for hand-held consoles, so I don’t think it is much of a stretch to think Bernitz and the newly reformed Grabacr Squadron simply couldn’t get their hands on more S-32s and actually had to make do with the similar and easier to obtain Su-47 (which, again it is a design he actually flew)

TYPE II GADGET DRONE

A squadron of five Type II Gadget Drones. I’m sorry for the low quality, but there’s very few images of them around.

The Type II Gadget Drone is an autonomous combat drone that featured in Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha StrikerS. While other Gadget Drones do feature some flying ability, the Type II is the only one that can be considered a proper aircraft.

Its armament consists in missiles and one oversized laser cannon under each wing. Combined with its plausible flying wing design, 444th Air Base’s higher command had no reason to suspect it was any different from aerial weapons that already existed in their world, leading to Spare Squadron getting slaughtered by them.

MIKOYAN-GUREVICH MIG-21

A MiG-21 in Soviet livery. It has seen better days.

The MiG-21, NATO reporting name “Fishbed”, is a Vietnam War era light fighter developed by the Soviet Union. While it was a sizeable threat back then, nowadays is a very obsolete aircraft that in the Ace Combat games is used as cannon fodder for the player in the early missions.

The ones featured in Chapter 7 were actually old airframes converted into drones with a flight control system reverse-engineerd from the Type II Gadget Drones to be used as disposable decoy fighters in big numbers to distract the JASDF and make them waste planes and ordinance before the real attack force sneaked in.

BM-335 LINDWURM

Fitting for its origin as a Belkan plane, the Bm-335 does look like something out of WWII Germany.

The Bm-335 Lindwurm is a Belkan bomber from the Ace Combat universe. It is a very old design, having entered service in the 50s, with a distinctive double fuselage necessary to house both its oversized night bombing radar and the similarly oversized nuclear bombs of the era.

An outdated design by the Belkan War in 1995, it was infamously used by the Belkan Air Force during the self-bombing of the Waldreich Mountains, in which seven nuclear bombs were detonated in Belkan soil.

As Belkan forces had more advanced aircraft available even in the world that formed after the Unravel, several Bm-335s were outfitted with the flight control system reverse-engineered from Type II Gadget Drones to act as a decoy disposable bomber force.

NORTHROP GRUMMAN B-2A SPIRIT

A B-2A Spirit. Note how it is individually named like a ship – not surprising, since they’re worth more than their weight in gold and only 21 were made.

The B-2A Spirit is a stealth bomber developed for the USAF. In the Ace Combat universe, Belka fielded several of them, and the two B-2A pilots featured in Chapter 7, Vulkan and Felsen, are actual pilots from Ace Combat 0. Presumably, the versions of them featured in the story are from before they defected to A World With No Boundaries.

During the failed attack on Tokyo in Chapter 7, B-2As were used as the actual bombing force, escorted by Sukhoi Sv-51s. Both aircraft featured strealth and radar jamming equipment, and were supposed to sneak by thanks to the confusion caused by the decoy drone MiG-21s and Bm-335s, but were discovered and either shot down or forced to retreat.

SUKHOI-IAI-DORNIER SV-51

A scale model of the Sv-51 in fighter mode.

The Sv-51 is the first Variable Fighter design to appear in World Without Authors (if you discount the static appearance of VF-25s and VF-31s), flown by Svafnir Squadron to escort two B-2As.

A very early Variable Fighter design, it was developed in the Macross universe by Anti-UN forces in the early 2000s, and as such doesn’t have some of the iconic features of Variable Fighters like thermonuclear turbines. While fairly obsolete by Macross standards, it is still a cutting edge machine compared to modern conventional fighter designs thanks to its three-modes trnasformation system and superior agility and engine power.

As no reporting name or nickname was ever given for it in the Macross shows, I took the liberty of having the NATO forces in the leftover world give it the reporting name “Flapper” inspired by how the wings fold up when changing modes.