#(i’m the bad guy.) traitor verse

[mymarifae]

i want to talk about an.

i want to talk about an in “kick it up a notch!” specifically, and correct a slight misconception i’m starting to see pop up about her character development and how it relates to the rest of VBS but mostly akito.

an is alone in her fear of being left behind and all her other feelings of inadequacy and jealousy in regards to kohane’s astounding growth as a singer. akito is not going through the same thing she is. for one, that’s not his partner. he’s not the one who plucked kohane out of a crowd and he’s not the one who designated himself as her mentor and expected to always be the teacher and never the student.

that was all an.

that’s why this is hitting her so hard. she assumed that she was the natural talent of the vivids - and i’ll get to why that is in a second; bear with me. and no, akito does not feel this way about toya. at least not anymore.

akito’s able to pick up on what’s going on with an so, so easily because he’s extremely observant and emotionally intelligent for his age. and because yeah, he’s been through his fair share of struggling with abandonment issues and feelings of inadequacy.

key words: been through.

akito isn’t... over his problems by any means, but he’s already felt what an feels now. all the way back in middle school, when he and toya were just BAD DOGS. hell, he felt it during that soccer game that made him quit the sport altogether. and just... in general, with the way the shinonome household is, he’s well-versed in feeling untalented, and like he’s not special, and like he will never accomplish anything in his insignificant life.

he’s gone through this shit before. he’s confronted those nasty, traitorous feelings of jealousy and the fear and the despair, and he worked through them with toya. and they came out on the other side stronger and closer than ever.

i’ll get into why in just a second again, just keep bearing with me, but i need to stress that an has never been seriously challenged before. that’s why this is happening the way it is. that’s why she has no idea what these feelings are or how to deal with them. it will probably be easiest for her to lean on akito as she works through this because he understands best the very specific circumstances of her emotional turmoil:

“i picked some guy off the street and made them my partner and it turns out they’re better at singing than me.”

but akito is old friends with negativity and he knows how to channel it into positive energy, into something that will push him forward and push him to prove everyone wrong. and you know what? he’s finally getting somewhere.

“find a way out” was literally about him starting to realize that he’s not... just endlessly chasing after the rest of vbs anymore. he’s managed to close that distance he’s felt for the past... 325734254889 events.

performing against the musician that bullied him all those years ago let him see his improvement objectively. he’s better than he was in middle school, and he’s better than the guy who humiliated him and that guy improved too! that’s just how much akito has grown. he’s surpassed a lot of his limits, barriers that he once thought were impossible for him to overcome. he’s flying high above many, many people’s heads now. that is what akito started to realize that night. (and i say “started” since he kind of freaks out afterwards - because he’s not used to thinking of himself like that. he’s not used to being proud of himself. which breaks my heart but that’s getting off topic.)

the point is. akito is very, very close to overcoming this idea that he will always be the worst at everything he loves. or he’s hell of a lot closer to it than an is. and even if he’s not, he knows how to cope with those feelings and fight against them.

an doesn’t.

why? because like i said, she’s never been challenged. everything has almost always just been handed to her. i don’t mean that like she’s spoiled or something; i just mean... everyone has always looked at her and seen Shiraishi Ken’s daughter first and foremost.

“you want to learn to sing? hah! of course you do! you’re ken's daughter!”

“look at you go! of course you’re a natural at this! you’re ken's daughter!”

“you want to surpass RAD WEEKEND? well, if anyone’s got the abilities to do it, of course it’ll be ken’s daughter!”

this is the dialogue an has grown up hearing. just an endless mantra of: “you’re naturally talented / you’ll be fine / go and do your own thing / you don’t need any extra help / you don’t need any push or shove.”

“you’re ken’s daughter!”

think of it this way: what almost always happens to “gifted kids” in school? they start off miles ahead of their peers. they are separated from those peers. they are not given the same resources their peers are given because they don’t need them. inevitably, those children once praised for being so so so much smarter, so much more talented and special, fall behind as their peers begin to catch up. they weren’t given the tools they needed to continue growing, so they stagnate.

that’s close to what’s happening here with an. the rest of vbs has begun to grow beyond what she was able to achieve innately, and that scares her so fucking much. especially when it comes to kohane because there’s no way around it: an expected to always be better than her. not in a nasty, self-centered way, of course; that’s not the kind of person she is. this was just her subconscious expectation because that was how she was taught to think about herself. but now reality’s catching up to her, and she lacks the tools she needs to keep moving forward with everyone else.

she doesn’t need breathing exercises or extra warm-ups or anything like that. what she lacks is an emotional tool set. she doesn’t know how to cope with feeling inadequate and worthless and good lord it took her like an entire event to learn what jealousy is.

an is alone in her feelings right now. she can lean on her teammates - she can lean on akito especially. but she’s the only one that can free herself from these chains rusted over with fear. no one’s going to save her. no one can save her. as painful as it is, this is the push she needs. if she never learns to process and deal with these feelings, she’ll never be able to keep up with the people she loves.

but don’t take these somber words the wrong way. this is project sekai, after all! this is a game about love and friendship and growing up, and accepting your flaws and shortcomings and pushing yourself to be the best you can be - to always strive for a bright future.

an will be okay. vbs will be okay. it’ll sting for a bit, sure, but they’ll make it through.

[planetofsnarfs]

audio version available above

You’ve heard the story. Thursday’s congressional session turned nasty when Marjorie Taylor Greene (R/Georgia) accused Jasmine Crockett (D/Texas) of not being able to properly read due to “fake eyelashes,” and the United States descended another step into a New Normal where stupidity is wisdom, childishness is courage, and cruelty is Christianity.

Greene is a zealot theocrat who apparently “learned” American history from pseudohistorian David Barton’s Post-it notes. She has proudly proclaimed, “We need to be the party of nationalism and I’m a Christian, and I say it proudly, we should be Christian nationalists.”Pluralistic democracy ain’t her thing.

She’s also the dullest of Crayons. In the past, Greene gaffes have included warnings about the “Gazpacho police,” a secret Bill Gates scheme to grow fake meat in a “peach tree dish,” and of course, those Jewish space lasers purposefully burning California forests so the Evil Libs can ram climate change policy down America’s throat. (Another gem from MTG. She once reasoned that ice age people didn’t pay taxes for environmental policy and did just fine.)

Yeah. She’s as sharp as soup. And she’s part of the larger cult of MAGA mindlessness that worships the convicted sexual predator and salivating Day One Dictator who once inquired about nuking hurricanes and has made millions selling merch of his own mugshot.

But beyond the stupidity, what frustrates me most is the celebrated cruelty. MTG’s eyelashes jab was ad-hom bullying that should have prompted the entire House Oversight Committee to oust her and issue a formal apology. Alas, New Normal allows Greene to hair-pull a professional lawmaker with only a limited rebuke, some click-baity media attention, and a collective national shrug: “Eh…America’s wheels came off long ago. I guess we’ll watch the crash.”

I also don’t condone Crockett’s childish return volley. Many of my fellow lefties cheered “bleach blonde, bad built, butch body” as warranted retaliation, a defensive return swing. Yet where they see rightly turned tables, I see a surrender of necessary high ground when critical times require an adult in the room. The “they made us do it” rationalizations ring false, as they reduce our representatives down to petty reactionaries instead of tone-setting agents of high-ground restoration.

Millions of U.S. Christians are cheering Marjorie Taylor Greene, or at the very least, they consider her outbursts a kind of fearless kick at the Devil. They’ve skipped past the best teaching of Jesus (humility, charity, forgiveness, love) to embrace Old Testament justice. The biblical Yahweh was proudly jealous, territorial, vengeful, even lethal. He took what he wanted, subjugated the Other, and shredded the opposition. God’s holy-war violence was largely punative, and MAGA America seems far too ready to exact similar retribution. “They dare to defy; we must make them pay.”

And who is “They?” American Muslims, Jews, Hindus, Sikhs, Mormons, JWs, spirituals, seculars, atheists, even Catholics and progressive Christians. Cruelty culture is defined by its enemies. Hence, theirs is a micronation of borders and walls, indigenous and foreigners, patriots and traitors. The planet is a temporary resource to be scraped and raped. American roads are most free when clogged with exhaust fumes and Trump flags. Dominance demands they razor-wire the rivers, crush the non-capitalists, and even shoot the dog.

It’s true that the Christ of scripture wasn’t always a good guy (check Dr. David Madison’s work on “bad Jesus”), but it’s astounding to see so many Christians ignore the New Testament love verses to instead praise the more savage savior Donald Trump. 

I Timothy 6 says not to love money? Trump loves money. 1 Cor 5 commands not to associate with an immoral brother or sister in the faith? Trump is immoral. Philippians 2 teaches humility? Trump is an egomaniac. Romans 12 says not to take revenge? Trump smirks that he “loves getting even with people.” Matthew 5 tells Christians to turn the other cheek? Trump tells his crowd to “knock the crap” out of a protester.

And his minions cheer. Stupidity is wisdom, childishness is courage, and cruelty is Christianity.

I don’t know where this road takes us, but like you, I feel the gravity of the descent. The hateful and spiteful no longer hide in the shadows, and even those who might think Marjorie Taylor Green is an idiot might still empower her for the one characteristic they most admire: her inhumanity.

[pikabxi-blog]

DEREDERE [X] You tilt your head when you’re confused. [/] You love sweets and cute things. [X] You are often confused and lost in conversations with your friends. [/] People often call you cute. [X] You care a lot about your friends. [X] You embarrass yourself a lot with silly question or statements. [X] You like bright, soft colors. [/] You enjoy listening to cute, sweet, gentle songs. [/] You add things to the end of your (childhood) friend’s names. [ ] People often say “aww” when you’ve done something clumsy/silly. [ ] You like anime/movies about romance, love and friendship. Total: 14

TSUNDERE [ ] You come off as tough and confident on the outside when you are actually soft and emotional on the inside. [ ] You often hide your true feelings for someone. [ ] You are caring but deny it when someone tells it to you. [X] You are protective. [ ] When someone bugs you, you tell them right away strongly, but are still worried that you’ve hurt them. [X] You are easily embarrassed. [/] Compliments make you feel awkward and you always deny them. [ ] You tease and bully the one you love to hide your feelings. [/] You can be violent at times. [/] You may hurt people a lot, but regret it right away. [/] You never cry in front of others. Total: 8

KUUDERE [ ] You don’t show your emotions to others. [ ] When you become close to someone, you slowly open up. [ ] Although you don’t show it, you are easily made happy. [ ] You care for others a lot, still, you don’t show it. [ ] People think you are mysterious. [ ] You can be shy. [ ] You aren’t very loud, rather silent. [/] You know who to trust and who not to. [ ] You choose which friend you can trust wisely. [ ] You like simple colors, like light purple or white. [ ] You are rather mature. Total: 1

DANDERE [ ] You are a shy person. [ ] You are quiet and don’t speak up for yourself. [ ] You look down instead of straight forwards when walking. [ ] You sometimes go to extreme levels just to get out of public speaking. [ ] You have stage fright. [ ] You are stoic and not very open. [ ] You hide yourself with your hair at times. [ ] You speak very quietly in case you say something silly or you sound weird. [ ] You are afraid of meeting new people. [ ] You are a hard worker. [/] You do not have as many friendships as others, but those you do have, you’ll cherish them very much. Total: 1

Result: Deredere!

Tagged by: “stolen” (indirectly tagged by cxldsxba, go shower them with love por favor)

Tagging: the person reading this (if you want! <3)

[villainsandvictimsalliance]

What things do you think people get wrong about Spinner's character in fics/fandom in general? Anything you've seen or felt was done right? Anything about him you'd like to see appreciated more?

Thanks! Love your posts about the LoV. ♥️

🥺🥺 I'm glad you like them, really.

AND OMG YES, SPINNER APPRECIATION POST. THAT WAS THE EXCUSE I WAS LOOKING FOR TO RANT ABOUT HIS CHARACTERIZATION. LET ME USE THE LIST FORMAT.

My opinion on Spinner's characterization:

I have several friends that used to hate Spinner or ignore him because they were fans of the anime but hadn't read the manga. They soon changed their opinion after my explanations about the matter.

I think the worst take I've seen so far is exactly that. He's not irrelevant or useless to the plot. It pains me when people portray him as such.

Also many people write Spinner like very passive? Like if he was easy to please and he would only follow others? That doesn't make sense at all. He found his way to the League just like the others. He stopped Magne from hurting Izuku on the Summer Camp attack, he confronted Tomura on the beginning of My Villain Academia and pressed him for answers, he participated in creating the name of the Paranormal Front and on recent arcs, he clearly told AFO to his face he never thought about following him, but Tomura.

So no, Spinner is not passive or a background character.

Horikoshi even emphasizes on this by allowing him to narrate part of the MVA arc. I can argue that Horikoshi wanted the audience to sympathize with Spinner, because he's the closest to being between the heroes and the villains, a real anti-hero. The author wanted us to see Spinner point of view and that shouldn't be dismissed.

I also think people downplay his relationship with Toga. We've seen him worrying about Toga since the MVA arc and later into the War arc. He is closer to being an older brother to Toga than Dabi is, we must accept that.

Spinner is very sentimental, but not a coward. Knowing his quirk is not enough to fight a bunch of people isn't fearing a fight. In fact, I really love how the League understand their limits and never push them too far. There's no shame in any of it.

Spinner is not a traitor. He's a really loyal man and his also not a blind fanatic. Once again, when compared to Dabi, Dabi keeps being a little obsessed with Stain and while Spinner still stands him, Spinner grew past Stain's legacy, he become something more.

Spinner is also a leader. On the late chapters, we have seen Spinner having followers. Please let's never forget he's main reason to be on the League is to fight racist people. He wants to change the system in order to give power to the minorities. Whether the League is a good place to do that or not, it doesn't change Spinner's goals.

He was worried about hurting children and civilians. Just like most members of the League, he wants to live, so he sees no point in ending the world. He wants to make a better society, not killing everyone.

On the other hand, I love when people portray him as someone who's well versed in politics and social movements. Yes, it's canon that he knows his things.

I love when people portray him as a very good friend and a general good person. Within the League, Spinner was the one who connected the most with Tomura, who was supposed to be the demon lord. Instead, Spinner saw past it, he saw the kid being worth following and protecting. That's why he didn't like what happened on the War arc. He knows it's wrong.

I love that the fandom agree about Spinner loving music. Yes, he was probably bullied when a kid, so I pretty enjoy when people create scenarios when he defends little kids or other people with animalistic quirks from bullies and racist people.

I think we can appreciate more his background and his presence within the League.

For example, Toga is partially rejected because her quirk reminds a wild animal, something brutal and barbarian. She could talk with Spinner about this, decided she can trust him and tell him about her crushes and stories.

Spinner had also work before, so he could complain with Twice about bosses and noisy clients and such.

He also enjoys a good cosplay, so why don't make him enjoy talking about clothes and costumes with Mr. Compress?

He could also relate to having specific skin conditions, just like Tomura. They share video games, that's right, but there's so much more than this. Tomura is pretty smart and I bet he'd enjoy talking about philosophy and academic stuff with Spinner. They'd obsess over Wikipedia articles at 3am.

Also Dabi could learn a lot about Spinner. Dabi needs to grow as a person, and Spinner can provide him with both a rival and a friend. They have similar taste, they both are really loyal and full of anger, but they deal different with it.

And if there's something I like how is portrayed in the fandom, it's Spinner friendship with Magne. I love those two.

I think many people with more basic beauty standards reject Spinner a lot. I personally think that's why the producers of the anime has decided he's not important for the plot and cut him from most part of the arcs. This is so wrong.

I mean, I want more people talking about how amazing is Spinner skin and his hair.

I want people talking about how adorable cute are the blue dots on his clothes, about how he's a strong guy ready to punch people without being an asshole, without being a bad friends or a bad person to kids and civilians.

AND HE'S OVER THERE FIGHTING POWERFUL QUIRKS WITH HIS SWORD. HE HASN'T BEEN BADLY INJURED YET. HE'S OVER THERE BEING THE BEST SUPPORTIVE MAN ON THE LEAGUE.

Also he's pure comedy and highly relatable. He's humor is pretty close to our online humor and I think that's amazing.

WE NEED MORE SPINNER META. ALL THE SPINNER META. GIVE ME SPINNER CONTENT.

So yeah, anon. I think Spinner is criminally underrated but I also think there's a loving side of the fandom that takes good care of him.

To all the Spinner fans reading this: keep the good work and tag me in it so I can see it and hype about it. 😌

[miraculous-cumberbitch]

sour album review

enough for you- oh god this song i love the lyrics. the lofi guitar is EVERY THING. this is honestly sad but oh my god it’s so amazing. olivia has done it AGAIN and this is only the first song i’ve listened to. this song to me feels like you’re singing this in your bedroom after a heartbreak.

1 step forward 3 steps back- okay love the piano. the bird sounds add peacefulness. this song is amazing, ballad wise. this is describing such a toxic thing, and i’m sure so many girls and women and men can relate to this. again: phenomenal job olivia

happier- oh wow electric. okay but piano. i love the 3/4 measure of this. this is so so good. oh wow that bass after the chorus. this is an amazing song with a (shut tf up) undertone. jesus guys olivias voice i can’t explain it’s beautiful.

jealousy jealousy- ROCK YES YES. okay okay angst yes. YES ITS ABT BEAUTY STANDARDS LETS GO. YES YES YES YES OHMYGOD SHES DONE IT AGAIN. OH GOD THAT BRIDGE YES YESYESYESYESYES OH GOD GO OFF LIV OMLLLLL.

brutal- OHMY GOD JESUS I THOUGHT THIS WAS GOOD BUT JESUS. THE STRINGS AND THEN THE GUITAR OH GOD I LOVE LOVE THIS SONG IT COMES IN SO UNEXPECTED WOW. THIS DESERVES A GRAMMY OH MY GOD.

traitor- really nice and slow with the vocals first off. the lyrics reveals so much though. assuming ofc this is about josh and sabrina, it sounds like he met her while dating olivia? i’m not trying to make assumptions but it really sounds like that which makes me really really upset. this is a beautiful song. “guess you didn’t cheat but you’re still a traitor” OH GOD THAT HURTS. whoever hurt her this way deserves a slap to the face because it looks like he really really hurt her omgg. and two weeks to get over someone? i mean cmon. all around beautiful beautiful song.

hope ur ok- first off, love the lofi guitar. WOAH the lyrics oh my god. only up to the first verse and this hits so different. y’all i’m getting serious taylor storytelling vibes from this ohmygod. this song is so emotional and candid oh wow. this is so sad oh wow. phenomenal job again liv.

favorite crime- love the acoustic sound. love the use of metaphors. “the things i did just so i could call u mine” woah. this is beautiful. her voice is gorgeous oh my god. this is a crying at 2am song and i ADORE it. this is so beautiful. i wanna blast this windows down in a convertible. this makes me so so sad because i can relate. just wow. AMAZING AMAZING job.

(i’ve decided not to put drivers license, deja vu and good 4 u in here bc i already listened to those separately.)

overall album- olivia honey you did a FABULOUS job. there are no words out there to describe how much emotion i could feel oozing out of these songs. i am honored that she chose to show this part of her to us. and to those people who call her obsessive, don’t. i’ve written 8 songs about a guy just bc of how bad he hurt me. this guy clearly clearly hurt her and if her way of coping is lyrics and songwriting, leave her be. the fact that this is a DEBUT ALBUM just knocks me over. this album has NO SKIPS AT ALL. i am so excited to see where she goes cuz this girl will fly high. i am a full on olivia fan now.

stream sour you guys!!

💚💕🦋✨💙💜🦄❤️

[marshunter06]

Fuck Off, Excuse Me Part 6

A/N: I can’t sleep so I thought I would try to write, dudes my bad for not continuing this sooner… I lack inspo and motivation plus I have no fucking clue where this is going

Anyways, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5 are all linked here if anyone has forgotten what the hell is going on in this verse cause I sure as heck don’t remember.

It’s Saturday night and Courtney’s a nervous wreck, for once it’s not over exams. It’s about a boy, her soulmate to be exact, and they’re going on their first date together. She tries to calm herself as Cate helps her get ready for whatever it is Duncan has planned. She’s a bit annoyed that he wouldn’t tell her anything about wherever it is they’re going, the fact that Cate is keeping quiet despite her whining isn’t helping either. She swears everyone is turning against her to take Duncan’s side, where’s their loyalty? She needs to consider finding new people to hang out with, maybe she should take a page out of his book and bond with Phia since her friends are all traitors.

“All done! You look super cute Sissy! Have fun, and stay out as late as you want!”

“There’s no way Mom and Dad would be okay with that.”

“They’re not even home this weekend, who cares. Just enjoy yourself!”

“I’m not making any promises.”

“There’s the doorbell, he’s here! Come on Court!”

Cate eagerly drags her sister down the stairs, opening the door to see a casually dressed Duncan. Good thing she didn’t dress up for their outing either, but that was largely due to Cate’s meddling. He greets her normally asking if she’s ready to go, she simply nods as she follows him outside to his bike. She admits enjoying the ride as she keeps her arms wrapped tightly around his waist. Being around him always brings a warm feeling in her heart, the soulmate effect is too powerful, so much so that she wonders why there are those who do not end up with their destined lovers. Lost in her thoughts, she doesn’t notice they’ve arrived until she sees the huge crowd of people around them.

“Duncan? Are we…”

“Cate said you like music, and my old band happened to be playing here tonight, we’ll have special treatment.”

“Bold of you to assume we have the same music taste.”

“I guess we’ll see, won’t we?”

He takes her hand pulling her inside the venue where they’re ushered into the VIP area much to the dismay of the crowd waiting outside. Their first stop is at the bar with Duncan ordering their drinks. She declines since they’re not of age yet, but he tells her she needs to loosen up. She still refuses to partake in underage drinking, until he calls her a chicken and bets she can’t handle herself. Naturally this prompts her to try and prove him wrong, she downs the beer in one go leaving him stunned.

“So, the Princess has a dark side.”

“My soulmate is a delinquent, I can’t be that innocent.”

“You continue to surprise me, Courtney.”

Her heart pounds hearing her actual name on his lips, his eyes softening as he gives a genuine smile. Maybe she shouldn’t have drank all that alcohol so quickly, she can feel her face heat up. He points it out immediately, telling her how cute he thinks she is, this only makes her blush even more. She turns away in embarrassment, not used to seeing this side of him.

“We’re going to miss the show if we keep standing here… don't you want to see your former band mates?”

“We have plenty of time, they’re always late, but we can go to our section if you want.”

She allows him to pull her away behind the restricted access sign. They’re up on the balcony overlooking the stage as people begin to file in for the concert. She finds that she’s actually excited about attending a live music session again, she hasn’t been since her own band broke up.

“Wait, you were in a band too?”

“Only for a few months, our personalities clashed too much.”

“I mean, with a name like the Type A’s I'm surprised you didn’t kill each other.”

“There were a few close calls… oh hey, I think they’re starting.”

It’s an odd feeling to be at a concert where she doesn’t recognize any of the songs, but she tries to not let it bother her too much. Subconsciously tapping to the beat, she listens to the lyrics and discovers they’re not bad at all. She isn’t a fan of every song, but there are a few that she would probably consider adding to her playlist. She makes a mental note to ask Trent if he’s heard of this band.

“So… what did you think?”

“They’re actually not terrible, dare I say I kinda like them?”

“I knew it! Admit it, Court, we have more in common than you thought.”

“I guess I can tolerate your existence a little more now.”

“I’ll take whatever I can get. You wanna meet the guys?”

“I wouldn’t mind, I’m sure you’re dying to catch up with them.”

She expects to feel out of place amongst his friends, but that wasn’t the case at all. They all immediately accepted her without question, making her feel welcome just as Phia did during their first meeting. She has to hold back her emotions, she’s not used to people being so kind to her without ulterior motives. There’s a reason why she only has two friends beside her sister.

He brings her back before midnight without her having to remind him of her self imposed curfew. He tells her he doesn’t want to push her past her limits, he’s already proud that she let her guard down around him and enjoyed herself. She doesn’t realize the weight on her shoulder she’s been carrying over the past month has been lifted until he points out how relaxed she looks. If he can bring out this side of her from just a handful of meetings, maybe it’s not such a bad idea to fall for him. There has to be a reason fate decided to bring them together right?

“Thanks for tonight, Duncan. I had a lot of fun, it’s been a while.”

“It’s nice to see you smile more, you look prettier when you do. Good night Courtney. I’ll see you Monday at school.”

“Good night Duncan.”

He leans in to hug her, the smell of his scent lingers in the air even after she closes the door. She has a huge smile on her face as she walks up the stairs, careful not to wake Cate up. It isn’t until she’s laying in her bed that she realizes he didn’t try to kiss her, and truth be told, she’s a bit disappointed he didn’t.

[thelovelyghostwriter]

The Number 4 in HxH

Okay so... It’s Kurapika’s birthday today (4th April). HAPPY BIRTHDAY PIKA BOI! I love you so much. 

Okay, now that is out of the way, let me talk about something that kinda bothered me a bit? 

So as some of ya’all know, I’m from a country where majority of the people are Chinese. In Chinese cultures, the number four is unlucky because in Chinese, 四 (four) and 死 (dead) is pronounced as (si). I believe that in Japanese it’s similar - pronounced as shi (the characters are the same as the Chinese characters). 

This is significant because the Chinese tends to avoid number four, even going by trying to avoid buying an apartment that is on level four. I won’t even be surprised if in some countries, the level is skipped (just like how level 13 in the Philippines may be skipped in some buildings). I did a quick check on Wikipedia and it states that certain buildings/hospitals in Japan do not have the level number four. Which is perfectly understandable. 

I hate the number four too. Deadasss every damn day that adds up to four (4, 13, 22 and 31) is bad for me. 8 is the lucky number in Chinese and I’m born on the 8th so hell yeah lucky 888.

So guess who is born on the 4th day of the 4th month? Kurapika. The other three protagonists are born on days where it has a festival/celebration. I’m not sure about Kurapika’s one, I came across the Tumblr where they dug up an info where his birthday coincides with an event that the ethnic minority in Japan commemorates the day of the dead (or something like that). 

Anyway, that’s not why I wanted to talk about it. That’s another discussion for the day. It’s the number four in hxh. It might be a coincidence but 04/04 is considered unlucky in Japan; and that also extends to a child being born on this unlucky day. 

Now, since that has gotten out of the way, who do you think also has an association with the number four? 

THIS GUY. 

Tserreidnich is the 4th Prince. Even his surname is Hui Guo Rou - a Chinese dish (honestly if you know the language, the surname sounds funny. It always makes me hungry). If you look into the hxh map, it’s actually just our own map jumbled up. The Kakin Empire is in the Azian continent that is synonymous with our part-Asian + European continent, as stated on Hunterpedia. 

Anyway, yeah, he’s the 4th Prince and he’s bad news. So I guess it’s unlucky. 

Another one that is often associated with number four is: 

OKAY. 

For Hisoka, I’m not very sure if the number “44″ counts. 

And as for his spider number, it could be the unlucky number four, but I also think it has something to do with him being a traitor among the Spiders. 

In the YorkNew City arc, Uvo mentioned that there is a “Judas” among them. I’ve recently dug up some info about Chrollo and the Spiders, and several comments actually pointed out that Chrollo and the Phantom Troupe are 13 members; and that Chrollo does have some sort of Christian allegory - him with the St. Peter’s Cross, the fact that Jesus Christ has 12 disciples, and Uvo straight up mentioned Judas. 

I went to see a painting I knew (I’m not very well-versed in Catholicism even though it’s my family’s religion so it’s just a speculation). 

In the Last Supper, the fourth head from the left is Judas: 

So I’m thinking maybe that might be the reason why Hisoka’s number tattoo is four (and less of the fact that it is unlucky). I’m pretty doubtful about this because why not count it from the right then? Maybe from the left it’s number four and coupled by the fact that it is unlucky, Togashi decided to just... go with that number. 

NAH. I’M JOKING. This might be a coincidence but it’s fun to think about it. 

[jeremygallery]

New Album “BATTLE OF TOKYO TIME 4 Jr.EXILE” Release 2021.6.23 THE RAMPAGE from EXILE TRIBE - “CALL OF JUSTICE”.

Now on spotify. 

Profiles for the ROWDY SHOGUNS: a group of bouncers (protecters)

 BAILEY: specializes in boxing and defeats adversaries with his refined striking technique. A stoic man who does not miss daily training. Loves fighting the strong, loves raw battles. Is a wild child born and raised by a lion in the suburbs of Tokyo. After he went down to the city and survived on his own, he met his current companion.  He knows loneliness and pain, so he is kind to all but his enemies. 

LUPUS: his fighting technique is his own style, but it is not limited to that, and it shows more than an all * ity battle. A rationalist who hates wasteful personalities. Basically a single man, but when he works as a team, he works closely with his surroundings. Try’s to solve problems by myself as much as possible before involving his colleagues. Among the bloody team members, they are often given the task of protecting women because of their relatively calm personality. 

LUCAS: A beautiful young man who left behind the image of a boy. His fighting skills are comparable to Lupus and Bailey. In this team of stray people in the city, he grew up in a rare and peaceful family. Runs a dangerous bouncer business to keep his little brothers fed. Since he is accustomed to caring for children, he is often tasked with the sons and children of VIPs. Has a cheerful and energetic personality, but is a little childish. He cares about his short stature, and he gets really angry when called "Chibi". 

HADES: leader of ROWDY SHOGUNS. He brought together the city's nuisances and strays to create the current team. Has a strong sense of responsibility, is good at commanding, and the members are very popular. Also good at making money and believes in his talent. His fashion is flashy and his teeth have diamonds. Hope for the successful and enemy to the bad guys in the city. His fighting style is a power type, boasts the team's greatest physical and muscular strength, and hits enemies with all his might. 

 GOEMON: a swordsman both rough and thoughtful. An investigator who devotes himself to improving himself without comparing himself to others. Is unbeatable in the world of swordsmanship. Always looking for a legendary sword while working as a bouncer. A samurai who does his best for others rather than himself with the motto "Forgetfulness and others". Loves horses with light blue coats and boasts a combination of humans and horses. He likes Japanese fashion and his favorite food is sushi. However, the choice of material is strange. 

 MI-YA: lost his family in a storm five years ago and thought he would remain a loner for the rest of his life. Until he joined the ROWDY SHOGUNS team, lived as a person without relying on anyone and partnering with anyone. He likes one person but hates loneliness. An optimist who thinks that it is okay if he is happy now, regardless of the past or the future. The emotional ups and downs are intense, but there is a place of innocence and charm that attracts others. He is obediently interested in strange things, especially magic. He also likes the Bible and reads it on a regular basis. 

 MARDUK: grew up in a warm and loving family, but one day someone killed my parents and my life changed forever. Since then, in order to protect his remaining family member, a sister. He searches for the murderer, while mourning. He himself is as a bouncer. Before he joined the team, he earned money by stealing and contracting, but now he has washed his hands from the villainous business. The evil technology cultivated at that time is now being used to protect people. He collects statistics on human psychology and movements and uses them for guarding. His fighting style is unskilled, and he fights with throwing and cresting techniques. He likes kimonos and has a hobby with GOEMON. 

 GUSK: a dater who dyed his hair purple. Not confident in his speed, but he has the best defense of the team. Even if he is shot with a machine gun, he approaches calmly and throws enemies with superhuman strength. Very caring because he grew up as the eldest son of a large family. He refuses when asked, and often shines with nuns, such as those thrown by other members. Usually planted, but on an empty stomach he becomes extremely moody and rampages. To prevent that, he usually carries a chocolate bar with him. 

 TRAVIS: a tactician with a deep knowledge in various fields. Well-versed in strategy planning and has a high level of control skills for peakles. Freely manipulates cars and helicopters to carry dignitaries and escorts. He has a rough personality and likes fighting. Has no martial arts background, but is strong, and his strength alone is enough to defeat the enemy. He is a history geek who loves 90's fashion and culture. He's simple and straightforward, but extremely stubborn. Never cheats, is his own justice, but there is a hidden danger that resembles madness. 

 SARUTOBI: an acrobat who boasts the fastest speed of the team. Has a high physical strength and kills enemies with his acrobatic blows. Has a bright personality, Aizaki, sincerity and humility. Values ​​his team cohesion above all else and doesn’t tolerate traitors. Apart from the "protect" skill, has the ability to "see the future for a moment".  Like Marlene's ability to transform, his principles are unknown. Understands that he "sometimes sees the other side of the speed because I'm too continuous." 

 KISARAGI: is a certain fortune sergeant. The house is tremendous Go Omiya, but he refuses the rails laid by his parents and throws himself into the world of conflict. Has a high intelligence and culture, and is good at defeat.  Also has skills in disguise and infiltration. Sometimes teams up with MI-YA to collect various secrets while acting as a bodyguard for VIPs. Before he left home, he was exposed to various "final facts". He is skeptical of the fake super-Tokyo, and he wants to throw a stone in this world. 

 MARINE: usually mild-mannered, but once the switch is turned on, his personality and body shape change drastically. At the time of transformation, it becomes a huge performance that surpasses even HADES, and demonstrates 9 violence. His ability is different from the "protect" skill that everyone on the team has, and MARINE himself does not know the principle. Has a longing for the rich and a strong tendency to rise. His hobby is training and he is on good terms with BAILEY, who is also a hard worker. 

 Q-B: in charge of equipment production for the team. Is good at making things and is also good at maintenance and customization techniques. Is dexterous and has a good sense, but his indecisiveness is a drawback. He thinks endlessly when he begins to stick. Doesn't like aragoto and is good at logistical support. However, he is reasonably strong when he fights, and tosses his enemies with his own equipment. Loves performing arts and one day the whole team dreams of doing something like Super Kabuki. Is a Japanese lover with GOEMON and MARDUK. 

 JOE: A-NOT’s companion. A rare and shy man among the bloody team members. Became a bouncer to earn money for the treatment of his sickly parents. Although he is not good at fighting, he has excellent intelligence and wit, and is trusted by his colleagues. Has hypnotic "eyes" and can manipulate the person he looks at for a short time. Good at work that makes people angry and gets angry. Serious about his work and always collects information and self-improvement. The most common sense person on the team. 

 A-NOT: In charge of the information department of the team. Is good at digital technology and good at brain fighting. "A-NOT" is a handle name, and no one knows his real name. Always plays games when he's not at work. His skill is also tremendous, is a legendary celebrity in the game industry. Rarely fights on his own and works by remotely controlling various vehicles and gadgets. More precise and complete than his work. Is obsessed with "information" and is most afraid of losing data due to disasters. 

 JUDY: A caller and the only musician on the team. Has a talent for music and is also an artist after the misery of his bouncer work. Has a sharp personality, is impatient and aggressive. Judges everything by "ROCK or ROCK".  His words, and actions are sometimes brilliant, but acts according to his own lines and aesthetics. Has a religious admiration for the great artists of the past. A passionate rocker who loves music, humor and mature women. If anything wrong or the wording is wrong, please help correct. And to the powers that be, this is in no way meant for harm. It’s for the fans who can’t read the language it’s printed from. 

THE RAMPAGE/ROWDY SHOGUN 

LIKIYA - HADES

 ZIN - GOEMON 

RIKU - BAILEY 

KENTA - MI-YA

RUI - GUSK 

YAMASHO - MARDUK-

KAZUMA - LUPUS 

HOKUTO - LUCAS 

SHOGO - TRAVIS

SHOHEI - SARUTOBI 

ITSUKI - KISARAGI

KAISEI - MARINE 

MAKOTO - Q-B

RYU - JOE 

TAKAHIDE - A-NOT

TAKUMA - JUDY

Credit: Garnet Dragon71

[stranger-who-writes-fiction]

ACTION COMICS ANNUAL (2021) fixed the trash fire that was Future State: Superwoman so lemme just RAMBLE about how much I loved it.

Spoilers, obvs.

Folks who read this blog (thank you, but also, my sincere apologies XD) will perhaps recall that I...did not particularly care for the Superwoman book, that came out of Future State.

(Of course, various individuals on twitter have since pointed out that Future State was deliberately set up to be a bad timeline; a future that the current DC books are actively fighting against. So I guess, technically, you could argue that the book was awful on purpose.

Except that, you know, some of the awful stuff was still framed good and inspiring. 

So, okay, but also, no.)

BUT THIS ANNUAL? FIXES EVERY GRIEVANCE I HAVE WITH FUTURE STATE: SUPERWOMAN.

I wasn’t even going into this book with huge expectations for Kara because of Superwoman, but! She’s here! As like, a key component of the House of El!

SHE IS THE LEADER. FOR MANY YEARS, APPARENTLY, WHILE CLARK IS AWAY.

I’m getting ahead of myself.

Backtracking a bit: this book begins with a framing device, featuring a group of Kryptonian refugees that have been introduced recently in Action Comics. 

We’ve got an older guy, Byla, telling a bunch of kids stories about The House of El.

Which is how we get back to the characters introduced in the initial House of El oneshot: Brandon, Theand’r, Ronan, Rowan, etc.

And, to be clear! I was excited for this book, knowing it would be about these guys! And these guys alone! Because they’re very cool! And there’s clearly like, a whole history and mythology just simmering below the surface and MAN. I wish we had a House of El ongoing. XD

They’re all gathered on Sanctuary to attend the wedding of Alura Van-El and Khan.

So FIX NUMBER ONE: The moon sanctuary introduced in Superwoman is no longer home to a bunch of rando jerks; rather, it’s an ACTUAL sanctuary for aliens/folks who need it, AND there are a BUNCH of House of El family members!

PKJ clarified on twitter that the ‘Sanctuary’ is built from Kara’s Fortress of Sanctuary, and that it’s a city that functions a little like Camelot. They grant refuge to all, and the members of the House of El act as a kind of Knights of the Round Table, protecting anyone who needs their help.)

THUS!! The actual dream of Kara’s Fortress is realized, AND she is SURROUNDED by friends, family, and loved ones, as opposed to dying alone. On the moon. With just her dog to keep her company.

Anyways it’s great. We love to see it.

FIX NUMBER TWO: Kara displays an emotion OTHER than barely-suppressed rage, and is genuinely happy to be overseeing this wedding!

Like, there’s no background, simmering animosity towards her cousins. 

Byla even hints at another ‘tale of the House of El’ where Kara and Clark meet again! And presumably get along okay!

FIX NUMBER THREE: The Superwoman mantle is passed down to Theand’r! 

Future State: Superwoman made a big to-do about how the Supergirl name was so singular that Kara never gave it to anyone (which is so STUPID because if your big thesis is how inspiring Kara is as an individual but you say, ‘no one else gets to be Supergirl’ you kinda undermine your own point.)

(Imagine if Into the Spider-Verse spent all that time building up how inspiring Spider-Man is as a hero, and then in an epilogue narrated by Miles, he revealed that no one else ever became ‘Spider-Man’, and that the name died with Peter.)

(That would be DUMB, right?????)

This isn’t passing the Supergirl mantle, but it’s passing the Superwoman mantle, so it’s close! Which, hey. I’ll take it. XD

FIX NUMBER FOUR: Kara actually comes across as the mature, adult leader of the House of El. This ties into the whole ‘she’s not a walking bundle of barely-contained rage’ bit; she’s, like. Graceful and dignified and very clearly no longer a kid/teenager. 

Literal and figurative character growth! WOOOOOOO. 

FIX NUMBER FIVE: There isn’t the gross ‘birthright’/’pure-blooded Kryptonians are stronger/better’ element in play. In fact! Pyrrhos, the bad guy, calls Kara a traitor for allowing the ‘diluting of Clark’s bloodline’ e.g. letting folks who AREN’T Els by blood become part of the fam.  

FIX NUMBER SIX: Kara gets angry at Cyborg Superman (the original one, not her dad) but it never devolves into murderous rage, as it does in Superwoman. She PARDONS him!

Mercy! Sympathy!

AaaaaAAAAhhhhhh love it. LOVE IT.

And so! Nearly every. Major. Complaint I had regarding Superwoman is fixed in this Annual.

*happy sigh*

Some final thoughts on the Annual overall, so as not to make this COMPLETELY about Kara. ...Well. Moreso than I already have, anyway.

The art is solid, though I feel for the artist who had to share the book with Godlewski; it’s not that their art is bad, it’s just that Godlewski is very, VERY good, so his pages look a touch more polished and confident.

That said, the character art throughout? Excellent. This is a cool, varied cast and both artists do a great job with all the designs/costumes etc.

(Well, okay, Kara’s costume looks a little weird at times; I like the costume but I honestly think they should’ve stuck with the costume introduced in Superman of Metropolis, it’s much easier for artists to replicate.)

(But also like. The Superwoman costume looks more stately/’grown-up’ so I get it.) 

I WANT TO SEE MORE OF BRANDON AND HIS KID.

I want to see more of ALL of these characters but you KNOW I found the two of them particularly endearing.

I love that the House of El has a Brainiac!

As is right and good, and should always be!

Overall, SO GLAD the annual allowed us to go on another adventure with these guys, and hope that PKJ has opportunities in the future to weave them in a bit more.

There’s already a cool connection brewing with the new character introduced in Action Comics proper. Thao-La, I think her name is? Can’t wait to see where that goes!

[gentrychild]

(so i saw the Burn - Hamilton about the suspected traitor au, and I thought maybe another song that would kinda fit is Last Midnight - Into the Woods. There’s a few lines (italic) that that strikes so hard.)

It’s the last midnight

It’s the last wish

It’s the last midnight

Soon it will be boom

Squish!

Told a little lie

Stole a little gold

Broke a little vow

Did you?

Had to get your snitch

Had to get your guy

And to get your wish

Doesn’t matter how

Anyway, it doesn’t matter now

It’s the last midnight

It’s the boom

Splat!

Nothing but a vast midnight

Everybody smashed flat!

Nothing I can do

Not exactly true

You could always give me the note

No, of course what really matters is the blame

Someone you can blame

Fine, if that’s the thing you enjoy

Placing the blame

If that’s the aim

Give me the blame

Just give me the notebook!

The others: No! (No)

… No?

You’re so nice

You’re not good

You’re not bad

You’re just nice

I’m not good

I’m not nice

I’m just right

I’m the weird kid

You’re the world

I’m a hitch

I’m what no one believes

I’m the “snitch”

You’re all liars and thieves

Like his father

Like his son will be, too

Oh, why bother?

You’ll just do what you do

It’s the last midnight

So, goodbye all

Coming at you fast, midnight

Soon you’ll see the sky fall

Here, you want the notes?

Have the other notes!

They were made for making you strong!

Burn them, the smoke’ll soar

Here, you want some more?

Listen to the roar

Villains by the score!

Well, you can blame another snitch

It’s the last midnight

It’s the last verse

Now, before it’s past midnight

I’m leaving you my last curse:

I’m leaving you alone

You can have the notebook, it’s yours

Separate and alone

Everybody down on all fours

All right, destiny, when?

I failed again!

Punish me the way you did then!

Take the quirk, give a hunch

Just away from this bunch

And the gloom

And the doom

And the boom

Cruuunch!

(Idk if context is needed: The witch’s “last curse” was leaving the cast alone because even when she was doing everything she can to save everybody’s life she always gets ignored/despised by the cast, and when she finally snaps, she realizes leaving them alone on the most dangerous midnight is the worse thing she could do now. The song before it is “Your Fault” where everybody violently screams at and shoves each other before agreeing everything is “the witch’s fault”)

[adiwriting]

@litwitlady​ requested more Isobel, so here you go.

As always, prompts for this verse are open. Drop them in my inbox or message me. (gif by @darlingnotso​ <3 ) 

PSA: I’ve been struggling all week with how to continue writing Malex given my current emotions about the TB situation. And I realized that not creating anymore isn’t going to help anyone. What WILL help is putting money towards relief for Native Americans. So from this point forward, every time I post a fic, I am going to be donating $$ to the Navajo Nation COVID-19 Relief Fund and if you are willing and able, I invite you to do the same. 

Week 14: 

Michael is laying in bed with Alex, both of them just starting to wake up after a late night. Alex had performed at open mic night and then Maria had offered up a round of shots. One round of shots quickly became several and after an Uber home, they’d continued drinking over a very competitive game of strip poker, that Alex had lost spectacularly at. So when the puppies start barking incessantly from the other room, Michael can only groan. 

A moment later, the doorbell rings. 

“No,” he grumbles and Alex whines. Neither of them make a move to leave the bed when the doorbell rings again. 

Michael looks over at Alex expectantly, and Alex’s only response is to wave at his leg, helplessly. 

Michael snorts. “Interesting how you are so ready to pull the disability card when it comes to things like this, but when you’ve been on your feet for hours and I’m offering you a chair, it’s all, ‘I can do anything anyone else can do, twice. Three times on Saturday.” 

Alex continues to smile at him until Michael rolls his eyes and gets out of bed. The moment he vacates his spot, Bell jumps into bed and cuddles up next to Alex. 

“Traitor,” Michael tells her, with no real malice behind it. He’s glad to see that she’s getting more comfortable with them both every week that she’s here. 

He slips into last night's jeans, zipping them up but ignoring the button. Whoever is at the door can deal with it. He’s not planning on being in his clothes for long. 

“Bring me a coffee on your way back,” Alex tells him with the most adorable smile that he doesn’t even flip him off playfully like he normally would at such a request. Instead he kneels on the bed and leans over Bell to give him a kiss. 

The doorbell rings a third time and the puppies go crazy. 

“Alright, I hear you,” he says, standing back up and heading out the door. 

He rubs his eyes and he makes his way through the house. He peeks into the kitchen. The moment the puppies see him, they start jumping over each other, trying to hop the baby gate to get out, barking to get his attention. 

“Give me a minute,” he tells them as he reaches the door. 

The doorbell rings again and Michael curses as he opens it, annoyed to see Isobel on the other side. 

“You couldn’t just use your powers to unlock the door yourself?” he grumbles, confused at the grocery bags in her hand. He’s 100% sure he didn’t agree to her coming over today.

“Your neighbor’s watching and being super creepy. I got nervous,” she says. 

Michael looks over her shoulder and rolls his eyes when he realizes who she is talking about. 

“Asshole,” he explains before raising his hand with a fake smile. 

“Good morning, Mrs. Register!” Through his teeth, he adds, for Isobel’s enjoyment, “not a single one of her flowers are gonna bloom this year. She reported us to the HOA last week.” 

“Why?” Isobel asks, perfect mix of annoyed and confused. “Your guys house could be the cover of Better Homes and Gardens.”

Mrs. Register glares at him before heading back into her house, at which point he flips her off. 

“She claims our fence is too tall,” he says, stepping out of the way so she can come inside. 

“Was it?” she asks, heading for the kitchen. The dogs go crazy when they enter. Isobel greets them all, pulling treats out of her pocket for them. Determined as ever to buy their affections. 

“No,” he says offended. “You think I would install a fence that wasn’t the proper height? I told her I’d cut it down if she wanted to see all the queer sex we have in the backyard. She’s a homophobic bitch who’s pissed off that I moved in.”

“So you moved in!” she asks, squealing in delight so loudly that he rolls his eyes. 

“No,” he answers quickly to cover up his slip. He’s certainly been calling Alex’s place home for weeks now, but he doesn’t live here. Not yet. Not until Alex brings it up. It was his space first and Michael doesn’t want to intrude or push too hard or too fast. “You know what I mean,” he says, hoping she’ll drop it. 

Thankfully she does. She starts unpacking her bags and he leans against the counter to watch. Trying to figure out what it is that she thinks she’s doing. He’s well past the days where he needed Isobel to stock his fridge for him. 

“So you did your little weed-o-magic curse on her?” she asks. 

“Trust me, the woman deserves far worse, but it’s all Alex will let me do,” he complains, taking the eggs from her and putting them in the fridge. 

“Well luckily, my orgasms don’t depend on being in Alex’s good graces.” Michael makes a face. He doesn’t want to hear about his sister’s orgasms. “I’ll let the air out of her tires on the way out.” 

He smiles at that. After some of the hateful things the lady has said to Alex and him, it’s what she deserves. “You’re my favorite sibling,” he says. 

“I know.” She smiles at him, patting his cheek lovingly. 

He hears the creak of the bedroom door open down the hall and sighs. If Alex is up, his hopes of crawling back into bed are slowly fading. 

“Are you going to explain why you’re waking us up on a Sunday?” he asks as Alex appears at the baby gate, puppies yelping to get out. Alex opens the gate and moves to the back door to let the dogs outside. 

“Everyone else is gonna be here in an hour. I figured I’d help you get the house ready,” she says. 

“Ready for what exactly?” Alex asks, returning to the kitchen. He leans against the counter and Michael shuffles over so that he can lean against him. 

“We’re having family brunch here,” she says, like it’s no big deal. 

“What?” he asks, as if he misheard her. He heard her just fine, but he doesn’t accept. He did not agree to this. 

“Our Sunday family brunch,” she says, like that somehow constitutes an explanation. 

He looks over at Alex who mutters, “I better go find pants.” 

“Oh I don’t know Captain Manes, I think you look delicious,” she says batting her eyelashes in a way that Michael knows is teasing but he still steps in front of Alex to shield him from her view. 

“Stop flirting with my boyfriend and get your own,” Michael tells her. Alex’s hands find their way around his waist and Micheal leans into the touch. 

“You’re no fun,” she says, turning back to put the rest of the groceries away. 

“Iz, explain,” Michael tells her. 

“We’re having brunch.” She smiles at him without an ounce of remorse even though Michael knows that she knows exactly what she’s doing. 

Alex snorts. 

“Okay, now explain it like we are 5,” Michael says, fighting back an amused smile. He is not going to be happy about this, no matter how hilariously persistent she is. She’s a brat and he isn’t going to encourage her. She’s ruining his Sunday. 

“You said that, under no circumstances, were you leaving this house today,” she tells him, crossing her arms, daring him to challenge her on her interpretation of his words. 

He shakes his head as Alex whispers, “I told you to not to leave her a loophole to climb through.” 

Michael looks over his shoulder at Alex, who is fighting back a smile, clearly having already settled on amused instead of annoyed. 

“I hate you,” he says, rubbing his face in defeat. 

“I love you, too,” she says with a laugh. “Now button up your pants and go find a shirt that isn’t covered in last night’s sexual activities. 

“It happened one time,” Alex grumbles into his ear and Michael laughs. 

“You’re doing all of the cooking and the cleanup,” Michael tells her. 

Isobel shrugs. “Done.” 

“We’re going to go get ready,” Michael says, taking Alex’s hand and walking out of the kitchen. 

On the way out, Alex turns to her and says, “We aren’t making a habit of this.” 

Isobel raises her hand in a salute and says, “Whatever you say, Captain.” 

The challenge in both Alex and Isobel’s eyes has Michael groaning. Michael lets the puppies back in and then heads back to the bedroom with Alex. 

“You shouldn’t goad her,” Michael complains. “If you give her a challenge, she won’t back down. She doesn’t know how to lose.” 

“Babe, I’ve been to actual war. I think I can handle your sister,” he says. 

Michael shakes his head. No matter what Alex may have seen in Iraq, he’s never really had to combat Isobel in full on event planning mode. 

“I’ll be sure to say nice things at your funeral,” Michael jokes. 

Bell whimpers at them as they start pulling clothes out of the closet. 

“Sorry girl,” Michael tells her. “We won’t be spending the day with you.” 

Bell turns her head to look at Alex, expression hopeful, if that’s even possible for a dog. 

Alex shakes his head. Bell puts her head back on the pillow and shimmies until the blanket is covering all of her. 

“She’s got the right idea,” Michael says with a laugh, trading out his old jeans for a clean pair. 

“It’s not so bad.” Alex sits on the bed to get his prosthetic on. 

“Isobel’s brunches from hell aren’t so bad?” Michael says, eyes going wide in comedic shock. “Did Alex Manes just admit that he likes a party?” 

“It’s not a party, it’s a family brunch,” he argues. “It’s kind of nice. You know?” 

Michael does know. It’s the kind of thing neither of them had growing up. 

“I still get to be mad about the lack of morning sex though, right?” 

Alex laughs. “Always.” 

Tagged: @callieramics​, @redstalkingdeath​ @alexmaanes

(wanna be tagged? hit me up)

[czarojay]

I can’t stop thinking about how Wilbur’s music goes with Wilbur the dsmp character( not the real Wilbur Wilbur, the same thoughts don’t apply to irl Wilbur, don’t worry o/ ). So here it is a post where i’m gonna just talk about my thoughts on this topic. 

Not all songs worked for me like Jubilee line for example, so don’t be surprised they’re not included.

Gonna make it a long post so people uninterested can go on, have a nice scroll across your dash, cya next time :] 

Saline solution, not all the lyrics, but a big majority applies to the smp story of his.  

I think I've lost my mind Blurring the fact and the fiction 

This one i’ve used myself in one of my fanarts and i really think it works well with Wilbur. He’s lost himself in the banishment, unsure of whether they’re the heroes or the villains, until he’s gone insane, unsure of what’s the truth and who’s lying to him. Maybe he’s lying to himself? Maybe everyone is actually a traitor? 

I think I've made my choice I'm a disease playing victim Slip the fate slip the victory I think I've made my choice Sink secluded in hatred Void the plans friends are making I think I've found my voice I'm a leech sucking blood bags Taste defeat, it's a sandbag

This really works way too well in my opinion. Wilbur played the victim for a long time, that he untruly lost his presidentship, despite being the one who proposed the election in the first time. He was a poor overthrown rightful leader, not the terrorist some people viewed him as. 

But in the end he did void the plans friends were making. When Tubbo became the president, he left, he made his choise, he let the victory slip, he decided to throw it all to the ground and blow it up. Wilbur the character, was a leech of L’Manburg, Pogtopia and for a brief moment New L’Manburg. At first a looked up to leader, became a person who manipulates others, causes death and destruction and is the source of problems in the end. 

Your Sister Was Right doesn’t have the same energy to me as the song above does, but I still could quite easily find bits which hit me badly.

I thought I couldn't love anymore Turns out I can't, but not for the same reasons as before I use everyone I ever meet I can't find the perfect match Abuse those I love While I ostracize the ones who love me Back

Wilbur the smp character did abuse and manipulate and use people around him. The first wasn’t as noticeable at first, but in the end, I feel it might have been more emotional rather than physical abuse? It’s hard not to imagine all the ways Tubbo or Tommy could have been traumatised because of Wilbur. The Festival is just one of the examples. Tommy for a very brief moment did consider fleeing. He stayed just because Tubbo didn’t want to go with him. 

After the exile Wilbur started to ostracize people around him. He wasn’t the happy and good big brother to everyone of L’Manburg. He became a twisted man, he didn’t interact with them the same way. They didn’t understand him in the end, did they? They were all traitors, couldn’t be trusted. He was alone, he needed to do this by himself, didn’t he? I’m Sorry Boris doesn’t really feel like I could just take out the lyrics and point at Wilbur and go “This fits”. I’m gonna do it anyways and try to interprete them the best I can! 

I'm not good for anyone here We reached the end of a decade Greenwich morphs into an arcade Southwark turns into a highway Up to hamlets, a tax break Newham, Islington a headache And Richmond's still shit

This could work with L’Manburg. This is the end of this era, isn’t it? All the ideals Wilbur stood for have been abandoned. They don’t fight with words anymore, they use weapons. They’re not fighting against the bad guys, Dream, they became the bad guys, terrorists here. They changed and so L’Manburg has also changed. Into Manburg. The walls are gone, buildings abandoned, the hto dog van devastated, new buildings growing and Manburg looks barely like it used to look like. It’s not L’Manburg anymore and even if they won it back it could never be the same, right?

But they'll knock down the pubs before helping you They'll burn down your towers before helping you They'll charge for your healthcare before helping you They'll let you jump under trains before helping you

If you squint hard enough, this could be Wilbur speaking to Niki. Schlatt taxed her more, Sapnap killed Fungi, Fundy, her friend and co-runned for the presidency, in the end also abandoned her for Schlatt, even if he was a spy. 

Even Wilbur abandoned her, waiting for the right moment supposedly, but taking her under his wing only after the Festival, which was when he would kill her along with countless other people if the button plan did work. She was on her own.

And even though I'm finished I'm not quite done with it No matter how far I run south I'm always there My lovers, my colleagues My best friends and enemies I don't think I want to leave you

This could apply to many things. To how Wilbur was in the room 8 times, yet didn’t press it. To how Wilbur gave countless chances, occasions for the problem to be solved without detonating the tnt. But it could also not work at all, since he wasn’t finished. He said so himself. Unfinished symphony. 

But at the same time, he didn’t want to leave them. He became a ghost and ghosts only stay when they have unfinished business behind. He must have decided he didn’t want to leave them, he decided to stay after his death.

And finally Since I Saw Vienna. The song which pushed my to making this post.

I am not going to copy and paste the whole song here, cause that would be such a bother to read and make sense at the same time, so instead i will just talk about my interpretation instead. And I am not saying this interpretation is the best or the correct one, but it’s how i choose to understand this.

Since I Saw Vienna is about a person of fluid personality, a person who also walks and moves and travels. In the second verse the lyrical subject’s goal are described as " horizon's my target “ and it makes me think of a person who has a goal set in mind and tries to reach it, but can’t. It’s moving so they move as well, trying to reach it (” If I keep on moving, never lose sight of it “). 

And doesn’t that sound so similar to Wilbur? He keeps trying to achieve his goal, but in the end he lost it, he doesn’t know what it is anymore. 

Treating my memory of you like a fire, let it Burn out, don't fight it, and try to move on

And this sounds like Wilboo doesn’t it? His memory problems? He does try to remember, but still it’s a little too close for me, not to think about. 

And finally,

I'll pick up my hiking boots when I am ready And I'll put down my roots when I'm dead

These are one of the rawest lines I’ve seen. Maybe not to all people, but this is the part of the song which hits me the hardest.

This is Wilboo. Wilbur is dead, he moved the whole live, he tried to achieve something, he fought, he lived, he lost, he won and he died. He focused on nothing other than reaching his goal during his life. He said he wanted one day to build a small cottage or wood hut in the forest to retire to one day, but he never grasped any chance to do that, he just kept going, trying to achieve something. 

Really, he settled down only when he died. He’s happy again, as happy as he can be with people being anxious around him and his memory being blank and seemingly becoming more and more empty with each day he lives through as a ghost. Only now, he’s building a house, enjoying his post mortiem life.

He’s putting his roots down only now, when he’s dead. 

[pikabxi-blog]

obligatory tag dump!

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Revolution Theme, Part 3: Lone Ranger

So, several weeks ago, I got a hankering to rewatch the Governor’s episodes (4x06-4x07) because I hadn’t watched them in quite some time and I suspected that based on what we’ve learned in the past year, I would find lots of new and exciting things. I’m going to get to that tomorrow, but first I wanted to post this short theory to sort of bridge the gap between all the Revolution stuff I’ve been talking about the past few days, and the Governor.

Let’s talk the Lone Ranger. And I keep calling it Lone Ranger symbolism, but it ties into the Smokey and the Bandit trailer from S7 and all the western/cowboy type symbolism we’ve seen.

So, as I said in my Fear writeup (for ep 6x16) I noticed that right before Daniel executed Rollie for being a traitor, Sarah called him Kemosabe. It just caught my ear and the first thought I had was, “isn’t that the Indian guy from the Lone Ranger?” Well, I was close, but it’s not. (Clearly, I’m not terribly well versed in the Lone Ranger universe.) The Native American character in TLR is Tonto. Kemosabe is his nickname for TLR, which depending on the source usually means something along the lines friend, trusted scout, ally, etc.

So, in general this was just a mention of the Native American theme. But then I thought about how she called Rollie that right before they realized he was a traitor. And I wondered if TLR symbolism could be about that.

That’s when I had a lightbulb moment. If you think back to that trailer in S7, it was Daryl and Richard hiding behind it. And what happened there? Richard was planning to kill Carol, which he backed off of because, um, Daryl. But he still ended up hiding the melon and betraying Ezekiel, which got Benjamin killed. Do you see?

Rollie betrayed the group in Fear, and Daniel executed him. Richard betrayed the group in S7, and soon after, Morgan killed him. So, this symbolism is about betrayal followed by death.

But I also wondered why they would use The Lone Ranger or Smokey and the Bandit as betrayal symbolism. So, I looked them up.

Again, not terribly familiar with the Lone Ranger, but it’s origin story will definitely make you side-eye. Apparently TLR was one of six rangers out riding, looking for some outlaws, but they are betrayed by one of their own group and ambushed. (Hence why the writers of TWD use this for betrayal symbolism.)

Side note: even the ranger thing is important. They’re law enforcement officers who could be thought of synonymous with “sheriffs.” And what state is most famous for its rangers? That would be Texas.

Anyway, the six rangers are ambushed and all of them are “killed” but when Tonto comes upon the scene, he finds that one of them, the youngest and younger brother of the leader, has survived. *coughs Beth* Left behind and left for dead.

So, Tonto nurses him back to health and they become besties. So begins the series, with TLR mostly on a mission to get revenge for his fallen brother. And get this, he and Tonto bury the rangers, but to aid in the deception, they even dig a 6th, empty grave so the bad guys will believe all six of the rangers did, in fact, die. Remember that grave that was supposed to hold Maggie in S7?

Anyway, Smokey and the Bandit is less clear. There’s not an obvious betrayal plot, but I still side-eyed when I read through it. It’s about driving contraband alcohol from Texas to Georgia. Yeah. And aside from the obvious TD symbolism, it made me thing of Fear. Of Sarah and her distillery and her semi-truck. I mean, it’s practically the same plot. Okay, not really. But close enough. I think it’s safe to say that, at least on one level, the S7 trailer was pointing toward Fear. But other things, too.

Can we all say Beth-ish origin stories?

Okay, that’s it for today. Come back tomorrow for how this ties to the Governor and how both tie in to the Revolution theme.

[atlas-of-a-human-soul]

Hurt, pt.5 (E.D.)

Summary: Three weeks later, Ethan and Y/N are in very different mindsets and while Grayson and Ethan had a heart to heart and promises were made, Grayson breaks a few

Warnings: ANGST, swearing, talk of depression, the end might be triggering and it contains depictions of blood

Word Count: 3000

Hurt - Series Masterlist

Ethan sat across from his therapist, glancing at her once or twice uncomfortably. His fingers grasped the leather chair with more force than necessary, his nails clawing at it unforgivably in a need of release - pent up anger and sadness mostly directed toward himself, it all needed a vent to come out.

“I called Grayson.” He sighed, looking down at his bouncing knees. He didn’t even realize he was doing it before, making a conscious decision to stop with the annoying habit.

“You came.” Ethan sprang to his feet, greeting his brother like an old friend. It’s been a while since they’ve hugged, let alone been civil to each other for any matter aside from work. Two months to be exact.

“Of course I did. Is she okay?” Grayson tapped his brother’s shoulder, relieved he had been on his mind long enough to make the list of people he’d call. While he had been extremely angry and disapproving of Ethan’s actions, Grayson still adored his brother more than anything. He just hoped he’d get back to some form of sanity where he could get to him.

“She’s, uh, in there. They won’t let me see her. Which is for the best, really.” Ethan folded his arms over his chest, something to hide his shaky hands from Grayson. Being open and vulnerable about his state of mind has never been easy for Ethan. He had a tendency to bottle things up and explode like a ticking time bomb. But now that he’s seen the damage, he had to come clean.

“She’s also pregnant, I think. I’m not sure, I heard something.” He added, noticing Grayson’s dumbfounded look. Grayson looked like he needed a seat himself, struggling to decide whether or not to be happy about being an uncle or devastated the baby would be born in a broken marriage.

“I broke things off with Bianca. Think I might need an assistant again. And someone to cover for me at work because I…I’m going to check myself into a mental institution. Tonight. Now.” Ethan knew he was throwing too much new information at his brother, but he needed to bring him up to speed before he took the plunge. He had to know his Y/N would be taken care of properly in his name.

He wasn’t a fan of doctor Henstridge, but the man had a point. Y/N is in a horrible position now and the pregnancy makes it even harder. If he wants her safe, he needs to remove himself from the equation for a while. Just enough to heal himself. Just until he can start thinking straight and make good decisions for the future.

“I think I’m going to lose it.” Grayson reached for his inhaler, in need of a breath he couldn’t seem to find on his own as his heart beats wildly fast and his lungs constricted painfully.

“It’s bad, Gray. I can’t be a good dad or husband when I can’t even help myself. I’ll go, do the work and the moment I’m out I will grovel for forgiveness.” Ethan leaned into his seat, tears pooling in his brown eyes - the color Y/N never knew she could love so much or that she’d look for in every man’s eyes, but the shade was never quite right as it was in Ethan’s, undeniably more attractive and enticing than any other brown eyes she had ever seen.

“I’ll take her home with me. Clara will know what to do. They’ve always been close.” Grayson spoke slowly, unsure what to say about his brother’s decision to check into an institution. On one hand, Grayson admired his bravery, on the other, he feared it. The first time around, they had both been in the darkness. They had each other and somehow they made it through. But for Ethan, his proud brother, to decide he needs inpatient treatment? That was terrifying.

“If she asks, tell her I’m in Australia for business or something. Just don’t tell her the truth.” Ethan swiped his thumb under his nose, sniffling.

“Why? Why don’t you talk to her? Clear the air before disappearing for a minimum of two weeks?!” Grayson raised his voice which got him shushed by nurse Jackie immediately. He nodded as if to apologize, returning his attention to his broken brother.

“No.” Ethan was sure of his answer.

“What I did comes with consequences. I can’t just walk in there and tell her I’m a depressed fuck-up who left her for someone else who I knew wasn’t right for me all along. In fact, I wasn’t even going to leave her that day. I just wanted to tell her the truth. I wanted to be honest and tell her I love her more than anything but I thought I felt something real for someone else. I had no intention of acting on those feelings and I was going to tell her something wasn’t right with me, but she got so angry.” Ethan paused, his lips quivering. Hoping to hide his fallen defenses, he ran a hand over his chin, covering his mouth as he continued.

“She got angry and she didn’t want to listen. Then I got angry and I let her lash out and I let her walk away thinking she would be better off anyway. It’s still on me. I let her walk out. I wasn’t completely open with her. My choices hurt us and I refuse to use my depression as an excuse, a hook to draw her back in based on guilt and worry.” Ethan stood, walking over to the door that separated him from the love of his life who had fallen asleep with the help of a mild sedative, unaware of his unraveling in front of her room.

“If she ever takes me back, I don’t want it to be because I’m fucked in the head. I want it to be because I made some kind of a redeeming decision that had benefited her and our child.” Taking in a deep breath, he turned to Grayson.

“I love her more than anything. I’m not dragging her down with me. So you take care of her for me, okay?” Ethan smiled meekly as he stepped closer to his brother.

“And give her this when you deem she’s able to take it.” Ethan slipped a piece of paper in Grayson’s hand before turning around and walking out.

“It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.” Ethan’s voice breaks and his psychiatrist nods. She already saw progress in him, even if it’s been just three weeks. She believed her client would be okay eventually, that he’d heal. He would find a way to return to society in time.

“Everyone manages their depression differently. Some keep pretending nothing’s wrong and just go through the motions. Others manage to burn their life to the ground…some take other’s down with them. I’m proud of you and the decisions you’ve made. You were selfless, you cared. But you will need support to claw your way back up.”

Meanwhile, Grayson had done as Ethan asked. It wasn’t easy, but he had convinced Y/N she could trust him. She didn’t mention the possible pregnancy Ethan did, but it didn’t stop Grayson from acting like an overprotective proxy for Ethan.

That day, Grayson waited until morning for Y/N to wake up before coming into her room. She was awake and talking, a faint smile upon her lips and he knew she was doing better. She wasn’t well versed in faking emotion, one of the things he loved about his sister in law. She was always honest about her heart and Grayson always knew what to expect – no hidden motives, what you see is what you get.

“I was worried sick, but you seem to be doing well.” Grayson cleared his throat, eyeing the blonde man who was talking to her way too closely considering his position. This doctor had crossed boundaries and Grayson didn’t quite like it. There’s a reason ethics exists and there’s a pretty solid rule on having a professional relationship with your patients.

“Gray?!” She pushed herself up into a sitting position, her eyes wide and locked on the door behind her brother in law. It’s as if she was waiting for Ethan to come in after him, to ask her to talk to him or clear things. For some ungodly reason, Y/N spent the whole night dreaming of Ethan coming to her rescue. In her dreams it was all perfect as it used to be – her Ethan being as kind and as gentle as he was when they met, as adventurous and sweet as he was in their relationship, as loving and romantic as he was in their marriage. She missed that version of him terribly.

“I’ve been called as next of kin. Wanted to bring you home. Clara can’t wait to have your around more and the kids are already decorating the guest room.” Grayson smiled, stepping closer to her bed with a quick glance at the doctor who kept a close eye on him. It’s evident the doctor doesn’t trust him, probably assuming he’d just take her back to Ethan, the bad guy in his mind.

“Oh. I can’t. You know I can’t.” She heard her voice crack, her teeth sinking into her bottom lip as she tried to keep herself together. Going to Grayson’s meant seeing Ethan and she didn’t know if she wanted to. Her subconscious seemed to urge her to see him, but her conscious wanted her as far as possible. Her brain would remind her of the pain inflicted upon her by his careless words and traitorous actions and she was scared of feeing anymore of it. Love and hate are two sides of the same coin and while she was dancing on the line between the two, she preferred to hate him for what he had done. It’s much easier to hate him than love him, because if she loved him still, she’d have to hate herself. So, yes, to love herself, Y/N had to hate Ethan.

“He’s gone to Australia. You won’t even see him. He’ll be gone for a while.” Grayson reassured her, noticing her features fall but a curt nod followed.

“Great.” She piped up, turning to doctor Henstridge. “I supposed you can get me discharged then?” Her lips curled up at the corners, managing to get a prompt response.

“Yes, of course. We still have to talk about –“ Edward cleared his throat awkwardly as he glanced at her belly only to resume eye contact a moment later, “your, uh, situation.”

“Situation?” Grayson cocked his head to the side, hoping she’d tell him of her pregnancy. However, all she did is smile up at him – she wouldn’t lie to him, but she wouldn’t tell him anything just yet. It didn’t feel like the right time.

“All in good time, Gray.”

Grayson kept a close eye on Y/N, feeling his anxiety grow as he pulled his wife aside for a quick question.

“Did she tell you anything?” He spoke to Clara, but he didn’t even look her way. No. Grayson’s eyes have been trained on Y/N since he brought her home and while she spent most of her time with his kids or on that porch swing he and Ethan built for Clara in their house. Ethan had talked him into building a matching one on his porch as well, mostly because Y/N was the reading type and he insisted he wanted her to have a porch swing.

She would sneak a peek at her porch swing from across the river, back at the house she and Ethan designed themselves. It was on the same property as Grayson’s house, separated by a river and a small woodsy area, two minutes away and very visible from her current position. It looked the same, as if it wasn’t the place her hopes have burned to ashes.

“You really want to live in the middle of nowhere?” Ethan questioned, his arms tightly wrapped around her waist, securing her to his body as if she were a balloon and she could fly away from him any second now. She placed her hands on his arms, drawing in a deep breath as she stared at the old house that definitely needed fixing up and vision, but she had it. She knew that the house had potential even if it was a rubble. He didn’t know it then, but when they met, she could still see his rubble. Despite what he thinks, she loved the rubble and she loved every crack because she saw the potential beauty behind it. And she believed that in this moment, as they were talking about buying a huge property with his twin brother, that the potential beauty she saw had truly come to life.

“It’s big and Grayson could get the one on the other side and you’d still have your own place but also your brother whenever you wanted to.” She turned in his arms, wrapping her own around his neck loosely.

“I dream of us starting a big family on this property. I can see the porch swing you’d make Grayson build me, the bay windows, the swings we’d get for the kids and the trampoline because you want to have one despite your age.” She smiled as he chuckled, aware he’s on board with the plan.

“Little Ethan and Y/N running around, driving us nuts.” Ethan licked his lips, his eyes glued to hers as if there was nothing more important in the world but the way she made his heart beat whenever her eyes bore into his.

“I love the vision as long as I’m part of it.” He decided, leaning in to press his lips to hers.

She could almost taste his lips as the memory had faded, catching a sob in her throat before it sounded. Every moment spent together was now a painful memory. They are sharp, and cut right through her she thinks about their past. Even the sweet good moments they had are now turned into a knife that kills her already broken heart.

Ethan had pierced her soul; made her skeptical about people and love. And she can’t help but hate him. She fucking hates him for that, for turning her into this broken mess, and even if she never saw him again, his touch will be with her for years, or maybe for the rest of her life, who knows. But she will see him again. She felt it in her bones. After all, she was to bear his children and she had decided she wouldn’t hide it from him. He’s an asshole, but he deserves to know he’s going to be a father.

“I’m sure he’ll love you guys. I’m sure he’ll be a bit shocked about the numbers, but he always said he wanted three kids. I guess that’s going to be something he can cross off his bucket list now. Unless Bianca gives him more.” She sighed, shaking her head to stop the thoughts from overpowering her.

“I never expected to have three at once, but at least I can close shop after.” She chuckled, wiping a persistent tear off her cheek as she placed a palm over her lower abdomen, unaware she’s no longer alone.

“Three?” Grayson breathes out, holding onto the porch swing as he lowers himself on his knees, half out of his mind. That’s something he didn’t see coming. He expected one, but three? He wondered if Ethan knew. Or if he didn’t, would he have done the same if he did?

“Please don’t tell him. Let me.” Y/N turned to Grayson, her lips pressed together in a thin line as she pleaded.

“I won’t. But…you should know he and Bianca aren’t together and from what he last told me they never will be.” Grayson wanted to at least open the door for his brother to have a place to come home to once he returns. If he couldn’t tell her anything else, he’d do this for them both. A small act of kindness.

“Wha-what the hell do you mean by that? Because he told me he loves her.” Y/N stood, her insides shaking – from pain or anger? She couldn’t tell.

“He said he never wanted a divorce. He thought he felt something for her, but he said it was just the mist of their past clouding his judgment. He wouldn’t have acted upon his feelings, but you wouldn’t hear him out and you left him, serving him with papers a month later.” Grayson defended his brother only to receive a scoff in disbelief on Y/N’s side. She felt herself shake, certain she’s enraged this time around.

“I WOULDN’T LISTEN?” She was losing control once more, her head pounding. “HE TOLD ME HE LOVES SOMEONE ELSE AND THEN HE LET ME SIT IN AGONIZING SILENCE AS WE WATCHED YOUR KIDS!” It felt like her throat would be scratched raw by her shouting, but she could care less. She was brought back to the edge she thought she walked away from and it threatened to make her fall again.

“I can’t believe the crap that comes out of his mouth.” She giggled, but her giggle quickly turned to a sob as she clutched her stomach. She had to bite her lip to keep herself from crying out, doubling down.

“What’s happening right now?!” Grayson jumped back to his feet, his arms open to catch her if she falls. He couldn’t tell if this was a real emergency or her simply trying to find a way to process what he told her.

But Y/N didn’t even think about Ethan right now. She felt something warm…something liquid come out of her. She felt herself growing faint for when she opened her eyes, blood began to drop on the porch and she didn’t need to check to know where it’s coming from.

She didn’t hold back her tears any longer.

“I think I’m having a miscarriage.”

Tags: @melodiesforari @brittttneyyyy @beautorigin  @dolandolll @xalayx @godlydolans @heyits-claire @peacedolantwins @dolanstwintuesday @accalialionheart @ethanhes @lanadeldolans @ebbach-03 @dolangels  @xxaamzxx @cutestdolans @yaren-ates @dolansmith @vintagebitttch @primadolangirl @caqsicle @jjustjoy @justordinaryjen @graydolan12 @imaginashawnns @graysonslovie @fandomsfeministsandothershit @bdsmdolan @graysavant @ethanspillow @dopedoodes @anything-dolan  @sugarfootdolan @joyrivh​ @reblogserpent​ @jonesana​ 

[devintrinidad]

I haven't watched it Akadama Drive the way through. But I have seen a lot of it. It's almost too gorey for me. But the visuals are a real treat and it definitely has the cyberpunk cool factor down. Swindler was a great main character! (I never shipped her with Cutthroat. I knew the psychopath was that. A psychopath and I bet he was going to turn on them at anytime. And he did! Never be distracted by the childish antics pretty boy serial killers!). 

I'm interested in the future of AD. I heard the last episode was getting a special Directors cut including a alternative ending. I also heard the AD creators were happy to hear AD is doing well in the west so fans are wondering if that means their hoping to make a S2? I don't keep up with AD news so I'm not sure if that's their intention or not. But I did hear a fan theory that S2 could be about the bad guys using technology to bring at least of the main characters back to life (considering Swindler had a religious themed death and both her and Courier's bodies could easily be recovered. Plus revival through tech is such a Cyberpunk staple) because Brother and Sister are still targets and they were would where to look for them. 

So maybe AD still has a bright future ahead with more content to explore the world (I honestly think Hacker could easily be a main character in any sequal). 

Onto the CAW/AD verse.

I could totally see 3803 being this epic biker chick.... Who gets lost easily. But because she does all these crazy stunts, her enemies (who don't know her yet) think she's planning everything to confuse them. X D 

I could see 1146's akudama name being Bodyguard. Because when he's not acting like one for 3803 and Platelet. He's taking up bodyguard jobs for anyone who needs them. For the right price and reason. If you're a scumbag who hurts innocent people, he'll kill you on the spot. But be nice enough to return the moneyto your corpse. Unless 3803 or Platelet needs something, then he'll strip you of all your dough and leave you penniless. He has a very ruthless rep. But he's so good at what he does, his help is in high demand. Ecspecially for someone who needs a bodyguard they can trust (and they know they aren't or won't act like scum around him to earn his wrath). He's fine with helping criminals. Just not ones who do a lot of harm to innocents or are involved in nasty business like trafficking or something.

Story wise things change up.

The way I see things here is that Cancer is the one secretly in charge and why things are so wrong. He's this absolute monster of a human being who gained immortality hundreds of years ago. He went nuts and caused wars and blew up the moon. He wants all the power and has created societies in his own twisted corrupted image (basically his dream in canon coming true here). But he's noticed after awhile things always go bad under his leadership and nearly everything dies. Instead of starting over again and again. He's decides to find a way to force everyone to become immortal like him so that even if they're killed. They'll have no choice but to come back to life like he does. If he has to suffer this, then so does everyone else. 

That's where 3803 and Platelet come in. For decades, Cancer has been collecting and experimenting on people in secret in order to figure out how to gift them with his immortality. 3803 and Platelet are surviving lab rats who managed to escape during a explosion happening in the building. 3803 is the closest he's come to achieving his goal. 3803 would later tell 1146 she has no idea how immortal she is and it scares her to death that she might be unable to die like Cancer. All she knows is that she can take a lot of damage and recover in time. She's been able to age a little. But she hopes she's not being paranoid about looking younger and smaller for her age (Macrophage, another Akudama who knows her secret, tells her it's common for girls like her to look younger then they are and that she has gotten bigger since they first met. But 3803 is still a little concerned). 3803 also has no idea about Platelets status in all this since she's never been badly hurt and she's aged normally. But she's also never gotten sick a day in her life and she was put in the same cell as her. The scientists saying all she needed was a little tweaking and they'd both be closer to becoming their goal. 

Ohhh, I didn't even think about 4989 and the others being 1146's enemies. I assumed they'd follow his lead eventually. Say they're dissapointed in him. Because yeah things are corrupt. But that's no reason to become a criminal and abandon their dreams of making the city a better place. They weren't there when he turned traitor so all they've been told is he got beguiled by some witch (3803 gets a very exaggerated and unpleasent rep along the Executioners for turning their top soldier against them. 1146 was already having serious doubts on his own but the organization puts the blame on her regardless). Eventually they get told by a superior officer if they can capture both 1146 and 3803 alive, they'll take 1146 back instead of executing or throwing him in jail. They'll strip him of his Akudama name and only punish him by putting a bomb collar on him until he redeems himself to them. It's not ideal. But for their friend they'll take it. They do eventually find and fight 1146 and even manage to knock him out and tie him up. They're prepared to fight 3803... Until they meet her face to face. From the rumours, they were expecting this buff scary woman who could rip their faces off. Instead they meet this determined but petite girl who looks like she'd hurt herself trying punch them. Even worse she's holding this little scared crying girl calling her big sis in her arms. They're the picture of defenselessness and it's suddenly making them not comfortable with this. This goes two ways: either they decide to cool down for a sec and let 3803 and 1146 explain themselves and then make the choice to leave and become akudamass too. Or, they harden themselves and take her anyway. 3803 promises to come quietly if they let her little sister go (they don't suspect Platelet is the Akadama Bomber). 3803 is hoping if she goes alone, She can at least convince Cancer Platelet died years ago and was a failed test subject. They agree and 3803 has to push Platelet away and yell at her to go (she knows she'll go to Macrophage so she'll be fine) because Platelet knows what's happening and is desperate enough to almost throws a small bomb at them (but 1146 would get caught up in the blast and 3803 glares at her to obey so she doesn't). The WBC squad does feel bad since they're not used to dealing with vulnerable women and children who can't fight back. 

When 1146 wakes up in a room with his superior officer telling him he's back and not getting a bomb collar. He's getting brain surgery and it's a surprise what that's going to be. Needless to say, 1146 is pissed beyond words. He's going to be forced to be their top dog somehow again. Platelet is alone and scared. 3803 is going to be carted off to Cancer so Cancer can make things even worse. Needless to say he manages to make his case to his friends who see definitely now know being a Akadama is better then this. Half of them go to rescue 1146 before he gets brain surgery and the others go get 3803 before Cancer can.

That's my idea of it anyway. Cause the WBC squad would actually be really good akadamas.

Now when it comes to 1146 fighting allies a lot. My initial idea was before he left, 1146 was the best of the best alongside NK and Killer T. They were the power trio that stood above the rest with a 100% success rate in missions once all three worked together. But unlike the WBS squad. They stick to their Executioner roles. I see this because in CAW canon, despite being softies inside, both Killer T and NK have this 'don't get chummy with civilians' mentality. Killer T ecspecially getting on 1146 for wanting to interact and go soft with them. In AD verse, NK and Killer T ultimately believe the Executioners are a nessecary evil at worst because the world needs them to be (Idk, you can keep the germs and make them monsters that Executioners have to fight to keep the city save too. Of course all of them are secretly made by Cancer to convince the most 'noble' of Executioners to keep the corrupted status quo).  When 1146 left, they took it personally. Particularly Killer T. NK keeps things more professional, but both want Roto resolve things with 1146 and see it as their duty to take him down. They don't believe 1146 about the whole conspiracy of a immortal Cancer ruling the world and doing all this other unbelievable stuff. Even when they see 3803 surviving a lot of damage, they chalk it up to her having access to some high tech she stole. Either way I'm conflicted on them being tragic villains who refuse to stop fighting 1146 and capture 3803 under orders or villains who get redeemed at the end. 

But Akadama Killer T. Tell me more? What's he like?

Other stuff-

Macrophage is called Hacker. Both because she can hack her targets into pieces with her axe and because she's a famous computer hacker. She found 3803 and Platelet years ago after they had escaped from the underground lab. She was reasearching for fun what the base was and discovered its use for making immortality. She took the two girls in to raise as if they were her own and trained them how to survive as Akadama (more so 3803 since she's older). When Macrophage isn't a assassin for hire, she's using her hacking abilities as mission control for 3803 when she's on the job. She helps her not get too lost and handles money transactions. They see her as the mom they never had despite that she's really only around 14 years older then them. 

Platelet loves blowing things up. She likes building things too. But bombing things helps her little family out more. She'll often plant tiny bombs all over the city and has Macrophage use her computer to keep track of them so she can detonate them when she sees a use to (like blowing up anyone chasing 383 while she's on her motorcycle). She adores 1146 and loves having him be part of her family. Partly because he's so strong and protective she doesn't have to worry as much about 3803 as much with him around. It's unknown just how much the experiments affected her too. All that's known is she's never been sick and barely needs any sleep to operate and always has nothing but energy to spare. She gets scared easily when 3803 might get taken away because her big sis has always been there for her and she's terrified of Cancer destroying her life and family again. If she lost 3803 she doesn't think she'd known how to live ob without her.

Cancer refers to all his experiments as his children. He calls 3803 and Platelet his daughters in particular and plans on having them back and fully like him so they can be his perfect family. He's actually known them since they were babies since, before they escaped, they've spent most, if not, all their lives in his care at the lab.

In this verse, 1146 is a much more aggressive pursurer of 3803's affections. He's still shy about making moves and acts stoic. But it's apparent he's interested in her early on and after awhile he makes no secret he wants to marry her. It always surprises her when he talks about wanting to marry her because he's too shy to flirt with her or even ask her on a date. He's both unable to make the first move, yet is very blunt about his desired intentions. She on the other hand is more hesitant. With her unknown immortality status, she's afraid she can't grow old with him and would deny him a normal wife. He simply says he wants her and no one else will ever do. 

3803 feels bad about him becoming a criminal. He's fighting his friends and comrades and has a huge life sentence on him all because he protected he. He tells her even if he has never met her. He knows sooner or later he would have left on his own and been branded a Akadama. Meeting her just have him another reason to believe in protecting others. Plus she does let him live with her and her for free. She still tries to pay him for his services when he protects her on the job. Initially he takes the money. But after too long she finds out all he does with the money is buy her things she was planning on getting later anyway. He basically was doing her errands for her. She gave up after that. 

 1146 is very protective of 3803's secret and has killed people over it to protect her. Those people being top high level Executioners who are in on Cancer's existence and his plans. 1146 knows the moment Cancer can get 3803 and confirm her ID. There's going to be a lot of trouble. He's made it a goal to either turn those people to his side or kill them all until there's no one left. When Cancer hears of this, he calls him a kind killer. 

Macrophage once jokes 1146 should be called Husband instead of Bodyguard because that's what he acts like with 3803. All overprotective and lovey dovey. He hates it when other men flirt with him and scared them off. 

Cancer is actually more aware of 3803 and Platelets activity then anyone thinks. It's just that he's immortal so time is a little for him. He kind of enjoys watching them hide and run and wondering how far he can push 1146 in his efforts to protect them. 

That's all I got I think. Putting in Cancer kind of changes things up but I also think he strangely fits in there very well. 

Any other ideas you have?

~~~

Oh my! It’s been a while since you’ve made such a long and lovely submission! First things first, yes, Swindler is best girl!!!

Heheh, I found Cutthroat/Swindler to be somewhat cute, but I had a feeling things would turn out for the worst when the team ultimately separated after Doctor’s betrayal and the fight with the Executioners. It was a pretty cool dynamic and I love how Swindler ultimately turned the tables on him.

(I’m a bit leery as to why he could see her “red halo” from so far away, but I suppose it was due to insanity/supernatural influences).

And yup! There was going to be a director’s cut. A Youtuber actually translated the tweets that directors had regarding the director’s cut and discovered that it was going to be an extra seven minutes of footage and would feature scenes that would help flesh out the last episode more.

It’s super interesting.

LINK HERE

Ooohhhh, a season 2 where we can see best girl and Courier to come back??? To be honest, I like the series where it stands. It had a message, stuck with it, but managed to punch it all in with masterful animation techniques and storytelling. One of the characters that I think would definitely come back, should probably be Hacker. He was a god of cyberspace and savvy with technology.

Someone once speculated that he’s smart: he would definitely upload a backup of himself somewhere.

(Another person thought that Hacker must have saved himself on Swindler’s phone because his drone icon was there after his final parting gift).

I think the best way to add onto the series would be to revisit their backgrounds? Then again, I checked out the available manga chapters that have been translated thus far, and it seems they might delve a little into that territory.

Maybe a one shot episode where we get to see all the Akudama go about their daily lives where they sometimes interact (unknowingly) Durarara style (another great anime you should watch if you have the time).

Hacker as main character??? Yes please???

3803 would definitely do crazy tricks, hahah. She’s simultaneously skilled and unskilled with her bike. She’s like the... Captain Jack Sparrow of the series except instead of being drunk all the time, she’s somewhat clueless and innocent.

Bodyguard is such a lovely name. Like... I can picture it and it really fits. Not only does it satisfy his canon role of protecting, it actually helps him from actually killing too many people unnecessarily. He’ll do it if he has to, but his main goal is to protect his charge, not go after any assassins and whatnot.

Ooooohhhh, I love Cancer here! You make him out to be some terrible god of destruction and chaos and I absolutely adore it. And the motive for immortality makes more sense in this au then in the canon for AD, hahah. But yes, I imagine after years of destruction and infamy, he would definitely feel lonely and bitter.

So of course, why not drag the rest of humanity down with him?

3803 and Platelet both being somewhat immortal beings? Yes??? And Macrophage being one of their true confidants? Also yes??? (WHERE ARE YOU GETTING ALL THESE GOOD IDEAS???)

I know later on you’ll talk about Macrophage being a hacker (because of major hacking skills in tech and in killing), but what about this: she’s the Doctor from AD. Not a backstabber, but one who was somewhat affiliated with the idea of immortality. Maybe she was one of the scientists who helped raise 3803 and Platelet and after discovering that all the rest of the experiments died and only two remained, she decided enough was enough and got them out of Cancer’s hold.

Hmm... how about we combine Hacker and Doctor to create Scientist instead? She’s cold and ruthless underneath her ladylike vibes, but she truly does feel for the plight of 3893 and Platelet.

I don’t know, it would make for an interesting dynamic.

Oooohhh, I love the confrontation with WBC squad and 3803. They’re so geared and ready (4989 is definitely sweating bullets while the others reassure him). Also, you know how in AD canon that the Executions are always in pairs? Let’s have 2001 and 1145 the original pairing before he broke out. Then, 4989 with 2626 and 2048 and Eosinophil while 2001 gets stuck with Band Cell. Because, why not.

(Or, we go back to one of my most heinous friendships I ever created, 2001 and Dendritic Cell).

Can I also say that Bomber is such a bomb name for Platelet? (Pun completely intended).

And yeah, the WBC squad are definitely really uncomfortable when they undergo some cognitive dissonance here... perhaps it’s starting at this moment that they realize that Akudama aren’t that different from normal people... or the Executioners.

Bomb collars and surgery for 1146??? Ooohhhh, he must really be the top Executioner... I wonder if he’ll reunite with 2001 again as his partner or get someone new who can help control him. Because NK and Killer T are definitely partners.

On a side note you mentioned that they think that Executioners are a necessary evil. It’s like your acknowledging and somewhat hinting that they know this is wrong and that Akudamas aren’t inherently bad, but do so anyway because of a corrupt legal system. I love it. It really adds to the depth of the characters.

And yes, we need tragic villains with feelings.

As for Akudama Killer T... Maybe he went through some mental breakdown before realizing that the Executioners aren’t always right )if they were ever right in the first place). Perhaps he breaks like 1146 did, but instead of using his skills for constructive purposes, he goes all out and doesn’t care about the law anymore. He sort of becomes 1146’s foil. They’re both rear Executioners, both saw the errors of their ways, but while 1146 becomes a protector in his own way, maybe Killer T decides to become a mercenary.

I don’t know, I love parallels and showcasing how far characters have done.

(I REALLY WANTED PUPIL EXECUTIONER TO BECOME AN AKUDAMA OR AT LEAST HAVE A MOMENT TO HERSELF, BUT IT NEVER HAPPENED. AT LEAST THE DIRECTORS CUT IS SAID TO ADDRESS THAT).

Cancer as a father?

Cancer as a family man?

I... that’s a concept I never considered. Just, I can only imagine him playing with all of his experiments, knowing that one day, most of them will end up dying. He probably favors 3803 over Platelet because of how close they are in physical appearance/age and acts creepy about it.

(Is this my Abnormalities!verse writing urge acting up again, probably).

Hehehe, why but blunt 1146. That is so cute and adorable. He and 3803 constantly dance around the issue, especially due to the whole immortality thing, but he makes it clear that he doesn’t care. Though he doesn’t know it, he’s actually quite suave when he finally convinces her that it’s the time they spend together now that matters so they won’t regret in the future.

3803 swoons.

Husband??? Yes???

Macrophage as confirmed 3803/1146 shipper? Why not???

Ooohhh, Cancer is more aware than what was already expected... I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA!!!

So I know that I said earlier that Macrophage would be a combination of Hacker and Doctor, why not also make Cancer have Hacker elements? Think about it, he’s practically immortal and it was never truly confirmed how immortality works in AD canon. Maybe his immortality is due to a combination of high technology and organic stuff. Maybe, he can upload his consciousness at will so that he can “supervise” his children. It also adds credence to the whole “3803 had high tech to help her stave off heavy damage” that Killer T and NK think is what’s going on. I don’t know, I just think it would be cool to have Cancer be a god in the physical and technological world.

He would be so OP, but that’s what Cancer probably would want in CAW canon, so there, hahah.

Hmm, anything else? Let’s see, Killer T as an Akudama would definitely be more of a Brawler character... I don’t have anybody down for Hoodlum... But who do you think would be a best fit for Head Executioner? At first, I wanted Helper T, but I realized that he doesn’t get super utilized in canon, so why not make him Executioners alongside Regulatory T. Seriously, they don’t get enough screen time (especially Regulatory T).

As for the majority of Akudamas, most are definitely pathogens or germs, but I’m assuming some of them are actually Normal Cells... Normal Cells with benign mutations, but somehow get the attention of Executioners.

But yeah, this was an awesome little au. I’m down to read some action packed nonsense with these characters. You should definitely try your hand at writing this, hahah!