#(seldomly)

[ruporas]

trigunned the hades or hadesed the trigun (id in alt)

[spielzeugkaiser]

Being on the nostalgia train this week really helped stretching my artistic legs again. So here, have some old things and some new! For now I'm done with this.

[yesloulou]

ahhh daniel and charles <3

https://twitter.com/dumbassf1fan/status/1641584198694866944

the pat pat pat pat pat pat pat pat pat pat pat pat

🥹💘

[clingylilhoneybee]

Hey yall, I just wanted to pop in here and try to utilize my platform to bring awareness to a few things while I talk about taking a break on posting personal content of my body.

TLDR: I’m taking a break on posting new content for a currently undetermined amount of time due to a recent diagnosis of PCOS and my body adjusting as i have started to begin treatment

If you’ve been around a while, y’all know that I went through a restrictive eating disorder as a teenager and struggled to recover in an environment where I was seen as “starting to get bigger” at the time of buying a size 4 dress for a school dress. That period of recovery then coincided with starting college, leaving that family environment and a number of other things that led to me gaining a significant amount of weight, but ultimately translated to me being at a healthy weight for myself.

However, despite multiple lifestyle changes (in directions that would logically lead to more or less weight gain), I continued to gain in the realm of 10-15 pounds a year during every year of adulthood, in a way that I described as “making total sense until it didn’t”. This went on at the same time as my periods being out of whack, which I originally attributed to birth control, and chronic fatigue that I could always find an excuse for, especially as someone who was a student in higher education until these last two years.

It wasn’t until about a year ago that I became aware that a notable amount of women in my family had PCOS, and that nearly all the bigger women in my family were not just “lazy and can’t stick to a diet” like I was led to believe my whole life. Thus started the journey of the last few months for me.

After stopping hormonal birth control and ruling that out as an explanation for my symptoms about 2 years ago, I’ve been working with my doctor and recently settled on a PCOS diagnosis. During my bloodwork, I was found to have significant insulin resistance, which is likely responsible for my body gaining such a notable about of weight. Because of this diagnosis and the bloodwork, I was started on medication to manage my symptoms, which also has the side effect of weight loss. During the last 2ish months, I’ve seen a total change in my symptoms. Regular periods, massive increase in energy levels, and also a notable weight change.

As someone who has spent years working through body neutrality and separating weight from moral value, it’s been fuckin hard. I’ve had to work through emotions of my weight gain being the result of illness, and the grief of fatphobia in my family being a direct cause of me not being diagnosed earlier. It’s so hard to reconcile that my weight loss is good, not because I’m smaller but because it’s treating a symptom of a chronic condition I didn’t even knew I had. There’s also many PCOS spaces that emphasize the moral value of weight loss and spend a lot of time shitting on their bodies before treatment, and tend to focus solely on how their treatment has changed their size, and not much else. On top of that, there’s some level of guilt in being on one of the “skinny meds” (and possibly being on the oh so popular glp-1 meds in the near future) feeling like a betrayal to the body positivity movement I’ve found community in, and a “cheating” method of weight loss to the broader society who treats weight loss as a discipline based skill. Add on the comments from SO many people about my body changing and it’s been hard to work through all the emotions and settle into a point where I’m comfortable with my body.

This has also led to me being even stronger in my boundaries around my size being fetishized. While I was always uncomfortable as someone in recovery, and as someone who never wants my attractiveness linked to my size, it’s also been so frustrating and emotional to see a body that has come from neglect and unnecessary struggle being fetishized for the physical manifestation of that struggle.

So overall I’ve only posted 2 new posts since I’ve started this medication, with only one actually showing a significant amount of my body (any others have been old, reposted content). I’ve always promised myself to never post what I am uncomfortable with, just to keep up popularity and get positive attention so I fully expect this trend to keep up as I become more comfortable with the way that my body is changing. I know that’s what many of you follow me for, and I figured I’d give an explanation that includes bringing awareness to a chronically under-diagnosed condition and giving a place for me to talk through the struggles in my journey so far

I hope yall stick around while this blog is primarily reblogs for the foreseeable future, but if not please take this as your awareness post for PCOS, which, even with a massive lack of information in the medical community leading to crazy amounts of under-diagnosis, is estimated to affect as many as 1 in 5 people with ovaries

[eraserisms]

.

[sirenofthegreenbanks]

there are already so many posts about palestine, so im gonna make one about israel. the recent attack from the 7. october is the first genocidial attack on jews of this degree since the holocaust. i cant speak about other countries but in germany things are reverting back to nazi times, with david stars painted on front doors of jews and jewish synagogues and kindergartens being closed down or swept empty because the people are terrified. antisemites and the far-right extremist scene is emboldened and empowered by this attack. they look at everyone‘s reaction very closely and at least for my country, ppl are insanely silent about it, which is like a legitimation of their views and their actions. i want ppl to remember that! there should be more space in this anti-genocidial activism than there seems to be currently, one that includes jews. i dont find it funny at all that my timeline, if politics cross it, and that most posts, if i go to the tags, talk about the settler colonialism and the attempted genocide by israel on palestine, but not about the baked-in antisemitism and the degree of terror and severity this recent event has. there are gonna be long-lasting consequences on all sides and its not gonna be fun, there has to be a way to talk about all of it, all human lives lost, all genocides happening and attempted, without letting one fall under the bus because its easier and fits the narrative of the modern justice warrior. years ago they said that this is a fight of anti-colonialism and anti-genocide, not jews vs muslims, in the topic of israel and palestine, but by choosing to not mention one and focusing exclusively on the other now u make it into one. what im seeing currently is a lot of performative activism and one-sided focus that does not help anyone at all save for those profitting from this situation, which are the antisemites, the nazis and the far-right extremists, the hamas and everyone else in league with them. please think about this for a minute and be conscious of whom u are unintentionally aiding

[jorvikwildhorse]

[bookwyrminspiration]

I don't know where my post going "i have got to stop reading books with no/dead/inactive fandoms" is, but I need it again. Lady Trent memoir readers I am politely inquiring after your whereabouts

[thecrimsonvalley-creates]

I’ll Carry You With Me. Always.

My participation in the @ddzine2023! Look I'm a sap for some of the "amorous" dialogues and like myself a little bit of angst so here we are :D

[powdermelonkeg]

easier to recruit minsc (i kept accidentally killing him so many times its not even funny)

*scribbles notes* Adding that, not putting it up to a poll.

[its-tea-time-darling]

it's definitive!! 58.2 % said yes to the pension increase and the initiative to link pension age to life expectancy was voted out with 74.7 % 🥳🥳🥳🥳

this is huuuge for switzerland, it only very seldomly happens that social issues get a yes at votes, so this is really amazing!!!!! this was an initiative by the left and the unions, it's amazing to see it got a yes ♥️♥️♥️

the percentage of people who voted was much higher than usual too (58% versus a usual average of 45%), love to see that people went out of their way to vote for a better life in high age!!! ✊🏼♥️

[bisaster-energy]

FIONNA AND CAKE IS SO FUCKING BALLER?????a

[blackbackedjackal]

I know of a Breyer collector via the Bella Sara community, who got rich off computers back in the 80s and has been buying shipping containers to hold the horses she doesn't have room for in her house and garage. I don't want to share too many details for privacy reasons, but if anyone reading this knows of a website with photos of thousands of Breyer horses and scans of every single Bella Sara card ever released, that's her, and, with very few exceptions, those are all her own photos of her own collection.

She once shared a photo of her storage containers in a Bella Sara group chat and it was mind boggling. Extremely impressive, but absolutely mind boggling

(I also feel the need to add that she's extremely nice and very helpful to new collectors, all this is just to say that, yeah, Breyer collectors are *intense*)

Honestly, and I mean this genuinely, you only live once so do whatever makes you happy and if that's having shipping containers full of plastic horses by all means get on with your bad self horsegirl. I love people like that in collector communities. If she has the money and resources and is actively keeping up with an archive to share with new collectors then that's pretty baller.

[megah3rz]

im catsitting and the cat who's usually not very affectionate at all keeps headbutting me and sits closer to me than before. i am the cat whisperer he loves me so much... and i love him..

[zoomingupthathilla]

I have this toxic trait -- If I see two of my mutuals mention a max... welllllll, they must be talking about my max.

[batnbreakfast]

Best picnic spot ever. *collapses next to the tor*