#*never questions their logic ever again *

[bloogers-boogers]

An AU where Lucifer and Adam fall in love after Lilith fled the garden yet went back to convince Adam to join them, in this universe, Lilith convinced Adam and he joined their revolution. Lucifer falls in love with Adam during their time planning, he tells Lilith and she understands. Eventually with time heaven finds out about this whole entire thing, including Adam and Lucifer's now growing relationship/ family. And lastly Lucifer is given a hard gut wrenching choice. To pick choosing to save Adam and their son instead of keeping his memories of falling in love with Adam. The consequences of chosing this option is that both Lucifer and Adam would forget their history together as if it never existed, the gain from this? Heaven doesn't have to get rid of Adam and Abel.

Eve basically raised Abel as her own without the knowledge that she did not birth him unlike Cain. Adam continues being the chosen one to father all humanity alongside Eve, his wife. And ends up growing resentful towards Abel thinking he was the result of Eve’s and Lucifer's affair as Abel looked and acted identical to Lucifer. Eve obviously denied everything but Adam was too blinded by rage and betrayal to believe her word for it. Eve knew Abel was Adam's but deep inside she felt no genuine connection to Abel like a mother would have to their child. But she loved Abel regardless.

And as for Lucifer, he has no knowledge of Abel being his son neither does he hold any feelings for Adam. He remembers nothing.

The moment Adam dies however, Lucifer regains his memories, immediately, his heart shattered into pieces. And also, he so desperately wants to reconnect with his son afterwards.

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

i appreciated this study: "They Can't Read Very Well: A Study of the Reading Comprehension Skills Of English Majors At Two Midwestern Universities"

[ETA: if you are somehow finding your way here pls note some - not exhaustive!!!! - follow up notes in this reblog. sorry again i mixed up megalodons and megalosaurs]

essentially, a pair of professors set out to test their intuitive sense that students at the college level were struggling with complex text. they recruited 85 students, a mix of english majors and english education majors - so, theoretically, people focusing on literature, and people preparing to teach adolescents how to read literature - and had them read-while-summarizing the first seven paragraphs of dickens's bleak house (or as much as they made it through in the 20 minute session). they provided dictionaries and also said students could use their phones to look up whatever they wanted, including any unfamiliar words or references. they found that the majority of the students - 58%, or 49 out of the 85 students - functionally could not understand dickens at all, and only 5% - a mere 4 out of the 85 students - proved themselves proficient readers (leaving the remaining 38%, or 32 students, as what the study authors deemed "competent" students, most of whom could understand about half the literal meaning - pretty low bar for competence - although a few of whom, they note, did much better than the rest in this group if not quite well enough to be considered proficient).

what i really appreciated about this study was its qualitative descriptions of the challenges and reading behaviors of what the authors call "problematic readers" (that bottom 58%), which resonated strongly with my own experiences of students who struggle with reading. here's their blunt big picture overview of these 49 students:

The majority of these subjects could understand very little of Bleak House and did not have effective reading tactics. All had so much trouble comprehending concrete detail in consecutive clauses and phrases that they could not link the meaning of one sentence to the next. Although it was clear that these subjects did try to use various tactics while they read the passage, they were not able to use those tactics successfully. For example, 43 percent of the problematic readers tried to look up words they did not understand, but only five percent were able to look up the meaning of a word and place it back correctly into a sentence. The subjects frequently looked up a word they did not know, realized that they did not understand the sentence the word had come from, and skipped translating the sentence altogether.

the idea that they had so much trouble with every small piece of a text that they could not connect ideas on a sentence by sentence basis is very familiar to me from teaching and tutoring, as was the habit of thought seen in the example of the student who gloms on to the word "whiskers" in a sea of confusion and guesses incorrectly that a cat is present - struggling readers, in my experience, seem to use familiar nouns as stepping stones in a flood of overwhelm, hopping as best they can from one seemingly familiar image to the next. so was this observation, building off the example of a student who misses the fact that dickens is being figurative when he imagines a megalodon stalking the streets of london:

She first guesses that the dinosaur is just “bones” and then is stuck stating that the bones are “waddling, um, all up the hill” because she can see that Dickens has the dinosaur moving. Because she cannot logically tie the ideas together, she just leaves her interpretation as is and goes on to the next sentence. Like this subject, most of the problematic readers were not concerned if their literal translations of Bleak House were not coherent, so obvious logical errors never seemed to affect them. In fact, none of the readers in this category ever questioned their own interpretations of figures of speech, no matter how irrational the results. Worse, their inability to understand figurative language was constant, even though most of the subjects had spent at least two years in literature classes that discussed figures of speech. Some could correctly identify a figure of speech, and even explain its use in a sentence, but correct responses were inconsistent and haphazard. None of the problematic readers showed any evidence that they could read recursively or fix previous errors in comprehension. They would stick to their reading tactics even if they were unhappy with the results.

i have seen this repeatedly, too - actually i was particularly taken with how similar this is to the behavior of struggling readers at much younger ages - and would summarize the hypothesis i have forged over time as: struggling readers do not expect what they read to make sense. my hypothesis for why this is the case is that their reading deficits were not attended to or remediated adequately early enough, and so, in their formative years - the early to mid elementary grades - they spent a lot of time "reading" things that did not make sense to them - in fact they spent much more time doing this than they ever did reading things that did make sense to them - and so they did not internalize a meaningful subjective sense of what it feels like to actually read things.

like, i've said this before, but the year i taught third grade i had multiple students who told me they loved reading and then when i asked them about a book they were reading revealed that they had absolutely no idea what was going on - on a really basic literal level like "didn't know who said which lines of dialogue" and "couldn't identify which things or characters given pronouns referred to" - and were as best as i could tell sort of constructing their own story along the way using these little bits of things they thought they understood. that's what "reading" was, in their heads. and they were, in the curriculum/model that we used at the private school where i taught, receiving basically no support to clarify that that was not what reading was, nor any instruction that would actually help them with what they needed to do to improve (understand sentences) - and i realized over the course of that year that the master's program that had certified me in teaching elementary school had provided me with very little understanding of how to help these kids (with perhaps the sole exception of the class i took on communications disorders, not because these kids had communications disorders but because that was the only class where we ever talked, even briefly, about things like sentence structures that students may need instruction in and practice with to comprehend independently). when it comes to the literal, basic understanding of a text, the model of reading pedagogy i was taught has about 6 million little "tools" that all boil down to telling kids who functionally can't read to try harder to read. this is not productive, in my experience and opinion, for kids whose maximum effort persistently yields confusion. but things are so dysfunctional all the way up and down the ladder that you can be a senior in college majoring in english without anyone but a pair of professors with a strong work ethic noticing that you can't actually read.

couple other notes:

obviously it's a small study but i'm not sure i see a reason to believe these are particularly outlierish results (ACT scores - an imperfect metric but not a meritless one IMO for reading specifically, where the task mostly really is to read a set of texts written for the educated layperson and answer factual questions about them - were a little bit above the national average)

the study was published last year, but the research was conducted january to april 2015. so there's no pandemic influence, no AI issue - these are millennials who now would span roughly ages 28-32 (i guess it's possible one of the four first-year students was one of the very first members of gen z lol). if you're in your late 20s or early 30s, we are talking about people your age, and whatever the culprit is here, it was happening when you were in school.

i think some people might want to blame this on NCLB but i find this unconvincing for a variety of reasons. first of all, NCLB did not pass because everyone in 2001 agreed that education was super hunky-dory; in fact, the sold a story podcast outlines how an explicit goal of NCLB was to train teachers in systematic phonics instruction, because that was not the norm when NCLB was passed, and an unfortunate outcome was that phonics became politicized in ed world. second, anyone who understands anything about reading should need about ten minutes max to spend some time on standardized test prep and recognize that if your goal is truly to maximize scores... then the vast majority of your instructional time should be spent on improving actual reading skills because you actually can't meaningfully game these tests by "practicing main idea questions" (timothy shanahan addresses this briefly near the top of this post). so i find it very difficult to believe that any school that pivoted to multiple choice drill time in an attempt to boost reading scores was teaching reading effectively pre-NCLB, because no set of competent literacy professionals would think that would work even for the goal of raising test scores. third, NCLB mandated yearly testing in grades 3-8 but only one test year in high school; kansas set its reading and math test year in high school as tenth grade. so theoretically these kids all had two years of sweet sweet freedom from NCLB in which their teachers could have done whatever the fuck they wanted to teach these kids to actually read. the fact that they didn't suggests perhaps there were other problems afoot. fourth, and maybe most saliently for this particular study, the sample text was the first seven paragraphs of a novel - in other words, the exact kind of short incomplete text that NCLB allegedly demanded excessive time spent on. i'm not really sure what universe it makes sense in that students who can't read the first seven paragraphs of a novel would have become much better reader if everything else had been the same but they had been making completely wack associations based on nonsense guesses for all 300 pages instead. (if you read the study it's really clear that for problematic readers, things go off the rails immediately, in a way that a good program targeted at teaching mastery of text of 500 words or less would have done something about.)

all but 3 of the students reported A's and B's in their english classes and, again, 69% of them are juniors and seniors, so like... i mean idk kudos to these professors for being like "hold up can these kids actually read?" but clearly something is wack at the college level too [in 2015] if you can make your way through nearly an entire english major without being able to read the first seven paragraphs of a dickens novel. (once again i really do encourage you to look at the qualitative samples in the study, lest you think i am being uncharitable by summarizing understandable misunderstandings or areas of confusion that may resolve themselves with further exposure to the text as "can't read.") not to mention the fact that most students could not what they had learned in previous or current english classes and when asked to name british and american authors and/or works of the nineteenth century, roughly half the sample at each college could name at most one.

the authors of the study are struck by the fact that students who cannot parse the first 3 sentences of bleak house feel very confident about their ability to read the entire novel, and discover that this seeming disconnect is resolved by the fact that these students seem to conceptualize "reading" as "skimming and then reading sparknotes." i think it's really tempting to Kids These Days this phenomenon (although again these are people who in some cases have now been in the workforce for a decade) and categorize it as laziness or a lack of effort, but i think that there is, as i described above, a real and sincere confusion over what "reading" is in which this makes a certain logical sense because it's not like they have some store of actual reading experiences to compare it to. i also think it's pretty obvious looking at just how wildly severed from actual textual comprehension their readings are that these are not - or at least not entirely - students who could just work harder and master the entirety of bleak house all on their own. like i don't think you get from "charles dickens is describing a bunch of dinosaur bones actually walking the streets of london" to comfortably reading nineteenth century literature by just trying harder. i really just don't (and i say that acknowledging i personally have had students who like... were good readers if i was forcing them to work at it constantly... but i have also had students, including ones getting ready to enter college, who were clearly giving me everything they had and what they had was at the present moment insufficient). i think that speaks to a missing skillset that they don't know are missing, because they don't have any other experience of "reading" to compare it to.

just wanna highlight again that although they don't give the breakdown some of these students are not just english majors but english education majors a.k.a. the high school english teachers of tomorrow. some of them may be teaching high school english right now, in case anyone wishes to consider whether "maybe some high school english teachers can't read the first seven paragraphs of bleak house?" should be kept in mind when we discuss present-day educational ills.

[daryltwdixon]

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 4.5 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 6.5

Summary: You and Tommy had been trying for a baby for years. When a trip to the gyno answers questions you didn’t even know to ask, your husband enlists the help of his one and only brother.

|| smut MDNI 18+, pinv, no outbreak, talk of infertility, not cheating but def not exactly kosher, baby makin', breeding kink, dirty talk, size kink, boundaries being crossed || notes: forgive me father for I have sinned. this is filthy. but also thinking about a part 2. kinda sorta maybe inspired by some crazy reddit stories. you'd be surprised how many there are like this LOL

You knew this was a crazy idea. Batshit crazy, actually. You were aware. But maybe, just maybe, if you spun it the right way, if you framed it with enough love and logic, it wouldn’t seem so absurd.

See, the thing is, you and Tommy had been trying for a baby for years. Trying and, well, failing. It wasn’t until your last visit to the OB-GYN that a simple question—"Has Tommy ever been tested?"—sent everything spiraling. A few weeks of waiting. A single piece of paper. An answer you never expected. It wasn’t you. It was him.

Not that you’d ever blame him. You loved him too much. But no matter how many old wives’ tricks you tried—holding your legs up after he emptied himself into you, orgasms before and after, cinnamon and honey in your morning tea—nothing could change the fact that no amount of effort would make it stick.

Which brings you to now. Sat at the kitchen table in your quaint, cozy home with Joel across from you, a few glasses of wine deep. His expression was somewhere between exhausted and mildly entertained from whatever dumb story Tommy had been telling. You’d needed a glass yourself, just to steady your nerves.

And then Tommy popped the question.

Joel blinked once. Twice. His mouth opened, then shut again, then opened just enough for a noise—somewhere between a scoff and an incredulous laugh—to escape. He shifted in his chair, pushing back just slightly, like he needed to physically distance himself from what he was hearing.

“You…” he started, then stopped. Shook his head. “You want me to—?”

He didn’t even finish the sentence. Just motioned vaguely, like the words were so ridiculous they refused to come out of his mouth.

Tommy sighed, his grip firm around your hand while the other wrapped around your shoulders. “Yeah.”

Joel exhaled sharply, eyes darting between the two of you, like maybe, just maybe, this was a joke. That you'd all start laughing and point at him with a big 'got ya!'. His lips parted slightly, his forehead creased.

“You’re serious.”

“We wouldn’t ask anyone else,” Tommy said, voice steady.

Joel let out a breathy laugh, hollow and disbelieving. He dragged a hand down his face before pressing his palms against the table, fingers splaying out like he needed to brace himself.

“This ain’t a normal conversation to be havin’ over dinner, Tommy.”

“We know.”

“Do you?” Joel snapped, finally looking at his brother again, his voice sharper now. “Because I gotta tell ya, it really don’t seem like you do.”

“This ain’t easy for either of us,” Tommy said, his voice steady despite the tension winding between the three of you. “But we wouldn’t ask anyone else. We want to keep it in the family, so…the baby would still be related to me.”

Joel’s jaw tensed. His fingers gripped the stem of his wine glass like it was the only thing keeping him tethered to reality. 

He looked over in your direction, but not directly at you, just at the table. At your hand in Tommy’s.

“And you’re…okay with this?” His voice was different now. Lower. Measured, like he was afraid of the answer.

You nodded. “We’ve talked about it. A lot. Ever since the results came back, we’ve been weighing options, and this—” You hesitated, swallowing, trying to gauge if he was even absorbing a single word. “It makes the most sense. More than adopting. More than a stranger. It keeps things in the family.”

Joel’s jaw clenched, his ears tinged pink. He still wasn’t looking at you.

Not until you said his name. Soft. Careful.

His eyes flicked to yours, just for a second. Just long enough for you to see everything—the disbelief, the sheer what the fuck of it all—before he dropped his gaze again, shaking his head.

“You don’t have to decide now,” you said gently, exhaling softly. “Just… take some time to think about it.”

Joel didn’t respond.

A few minutes later, he left—no joke, no small talk of the next Sunday night football game could cut through the weight pressing down on the room. Just a stiff nod, a muttered see ya, and the quiet sound of the door closing behind him.

The following Sunday, it almost felt like the conversation had never happened.

The three of you sat at the sports bar, watching the Cowboys play on the massive screens, the air thick with the scent of beer and fried food. Tommy was his usual self, shouting at the refs, leaning into Joel’s shoulder every time the score tipped in their favor. Joel, on the other hand, was harder to read. He was relaxed enough, beer in hand, his usual dry remarks slipping out here and there, but there was something quieter beneath it all—something you couldn’t quite put your finger on.

Not one mention of a baby. Not a single word about what you’d asked of him.

And maybe that was his answer.

When your husband got up, throwing out the excuse of takin’ a leak, the energy between you and Joel shifted. Not in a way you could name—just… thicker. More noticeable.

He sat a seat away, the empty barstool between you like a buffer neither of you had the nerve to close.

You tried to let it roll off your shoulders, but as you sat there, your mind wandered. What if Joel had said yes? What if it worked? Would the baby have his dark eyes, that heavy, thoughtful brow? Would they get that serious little crease between their eyes when they were thinking? His thick hair, his strong hands?

Tommy would still be their father. That was what mattered. That was the whole point. But the idea of seeing traces of Joel—subtle things, the shape of a nose, the curve of a smile…

The thought sent a strange, unfamiliar feeling curling in your chest.

It hurt, his lack of an answer, of course it did. But how could you blame him? You were asking for too much. Asking him to do something unnatural, something messy, something that could never be as clean and logical as you and Tommy had tried to convince yourselves it was.

You swallowed, setting your drink down as the silence stretched. “Listen, Joel—”

“I’ll do it.”

It was quiet. Like he wasn’t sure if he meant to say it out loud.

Your breath caught, as you stared at him, mouth agape. The side of his face gave nothing away as he kept his eyes on the TV as you waited for some kind of smirk, some sign that he was messing with you.

But he wasn’t.

Joel kept his eyes averted, like this was the kind of thing a person could say without looking someone in the eye. He took a long drink from his bottle, then set it down with a dull thud.

“You and Tommy deserve this,” he murmured, rolling the glass between his palms as he stared down at it. “To have a kid.”

Your heart constricted at the sincerity in his voice.

He exhaled, shaking his head slightly. “My life is better ‘cause of Sarah. Don’t think I ever told Tommy that outright, but… it is. I’d love to see him get to have that too.”

You blinked. “Are you…” Your voice was barely above a whisper. “You serious?”

Joel turned to you finally, his eyes meeting yours for the first time since last week before you dropped the bomb on him, “Yeah.” he said finally, “Yeah, I’m serious.”

He was clearly uncomfortable, clearly still working through it—but the fact that he said it at all, that he meant it... that was more than you expected.

To be honest, you knew the baster idea wouldn’t work.

Not that you’d ever say it out loud. Not to your very loving, very kind, very hopeful husband. But deep down, you were pretty sure that by the time Joel had taken care of himself, transferred it into a container, driven it over, and you’d sat back on the bed with your legs up, whatever needed to be alive in there was long dead.

You didn’t bring it up. Couldn’t. Not when Tommy was trying so hard to make this work.

Across from you in the kitchen one morning, another negative pregnancy test sitting between you, your husband sighed, rubbing a hand over his jaw before reaching for his mug, “If I ask you somethin’,” he murmured, voice low, hesitant, “will you tell me the truth?”

Your eyes flicked up to his. “Of course, baby.”

His hand rested on the granite, fingers close enough that you reached out, tracing them lightly with your own. His eyes drifted down to your delicate touch against him.

Then, he exhaled slowly and cleared his throat.

“Do you think we should try…” His fingers twitched under yours. “Ya know. The old-fashioned way?”

For a second, the words didn’t land.

Not until you saw the way his eyes found yours and he was looking at you—serious, thoughtful, like he’d been turning it over in his head for longer than he wanted to admit.

You blinked. “What do you mean?”

Tommy sighed, pressing his lips together before setting his coffee down. “I just think… for it to stick properly, we might need to try somethin’ more… natural.”

Your mind reeled. Heat crept up your neck, flushing your skin before you could stop it.

The idea of being with another man…

Tommy saw it. The way your lips parted, the way your breath caught just slightly.

He stepped closer, smoothing his hands over your cheeks, tilting your face up toward his.

“Only if you were comfortable with it,” he assured, voice gentle, steady. “I’d never ask you to do somethin’ you didn’t wanna do.”

You swallowed hard, still trying to process. “I—I don’t know, Tommy.” Your voice was barely above a whisper. “And Joel would flip out if we asked that of him.”

Tommy hummed, thumbs brushing over your cheekbones. “Yeah, he might.”

Might was an understatement.

Joel was over the following day to help with your bathroom remodel, a project the brothers had taken on during the slow season. You were busy finishing whatever odds and ends you needed to get done upstairs when you heard his voice traveling through the house.

Not just his voice—but the volume of it.

“Are you outta your goddamn mind?!”

The sound rattled through the house, shaking the walls as you hovered at the top of the stairs, heart pounding.

“Joel—” Tommy’s voice, calm but firm.

“No. No, you don’t get to ‘Joel’ me right now, Tommy, because what you just said—what you just— Christ.” There was the distinct sound of something slamming—a fist on the table? A chair shoved back? You weren’t sure, but it made you wince.

“Look, man, I knew you’d be pissed,” Tommy started, only to be cut off immediately.

“Oh, did you?” Joel’s voice dripped with sarcasm. “You knew I’d be pissed, but you went ahead and asked anyway? Jesus fuckin’ Christ. I’m already crossin’ so many lines with what we’re doin’, and now you’re askin’ me to…to—!?”

You could picture it perfectly—Joel pacing the length of the room, one hand on his hip, the other raking through his hair, winding up, because when Joel was really mad, he didn’t just stand there.

“You’re makin’ it a bigger deal than it is,” Tommy tried, tone even.

Joel let out a sharp, humorless laugh. “Oh, I’m sorry, did I misunderstand the part where you just asked me to fuck your wife?”

Heat crawled up your neck.

“We ain’t askin’ that, Jesus, Joel, don’t talk about her like—”

“You are absolutely askin’ that.”

“It’s not like that.”

“The hell it ain’t!”

Silence. Heavy, tense.

You swallowed hard, gripping the banister, unsure whether to go down there or stay put.

Then—Joel’s voice, lower now, but still laced with disbelief.

“Tell me you didn’t really think I’d say yes to this.”

And Tommy, just as steady as ever:

“I think you wanna say no.” A pause, and you could almost feel the shift in the air between them. “But deep down? I think you’re already considerin’ it.”

Joel let out a slow, sharp exhale, but he didn’t argue.

And a week later, he was back at your doorstep.

There were three rules.

1. No kissing.

That was the hard line, the non-negotiable. Kissing was too intimate— too personal, too close to something else entirely. You could rationalize everything else, strip it down to the mechanics of what needed to happen, but kissing blurred the lines. That made it mean something. And this couldn’t mean anything.

2. No talking about it outside the bedroom. 

No slipping up over dinner, no awkward mentions in passing, no weird jokes over a few beers. It had to stay contained. A thing that only existed in a room with the door closed and the world shut out. Because once it bled into the rest of your life—once it became something you acknowledged beyond those four walls—it would become real.

3. No names

No whispered Joel in the dark, he couldn’t say yours while he was inside you. Names had weight. Names had meaning. And the second you said them, it stopped being about a baby.

So when your ovulation window came within the next few days, you found yourself in your bedroom with the two brothers. When Tommy excused himself from the room—pressing a kiss to your forehead before heading out to meet his buddies at the bar like this wasn’t the weirdest fucking thing in the world— you turned to Joel

Over the years, you’d come to know him, grown comfortable with him. That familiarity should’ve helped, should’ve made this easier. But sitting here now, alone in the bedroom with him, awkward was an understatement.

Joel sighed, rubbing his forefinger and thumb along his brows as he stood at the edge of the bed. “Guess we better get to it, then.”

You nodded numbly, tucking your legs beneath you on the bedspread, looking up at him.

He was already tense, broad shoulders squared, avoiding your gaze like you weren’t even in the damn room. He exhaled sharply, then—without ceremony—unbuckled his belt. The clink of metal sent a strange ripple through your stomach, but you forced yourself to focus, watching as he shucked his jeans down to his thighs, taking his boxers with them.

Your breath caught.

Even soft as he was at the moment, he was bigger than Tommy. Thicker.

Joel cleared his throat, shifting his stance, one hand bracing against the bedpost while the other wrapped around himself. He wasn’t looking at you. Not even close. His gaze stayed fixed somewhere off to the side, jaw locked, the muscles in his forearm flexing as he started moving his hand.

It wasn’t working.

Minutes passed, the air between you thick and suffocating, but he remained… soft. The tension in his face deepened, brows knitting, his motions growing stilted.

You chewed your lip, watching as his frustration mounted.

“You don’t gotta sit there starin’ at me,” he muttered, voice gruff, like this was somehow your fault.

You exhaled through your nose. “I’m just… tryin’ to think how I can help.”

His hand stilled. “You’re fine. Just–just give me a minute,”

Then suddenly as the idea struck, you reached for the hem of your shirt and pulled it up.

Joel’s head snapped toward you, eyes going wide. “What’re you doin’?” His voice was sharp, edged in something that sounded suspiciously close to panic.

You hesitated. “Just… thought maybe it’d help.”

“Well, don’t.” His ears were red. “Keep your damn clothes on.”

You huffed. “Jesus, it’s just a shirt.”

He grumbled something under his breath, but let it go, shaking his head like he couldn’t believe any of this was happening.

Another beat of silence, only the sound of skin on skin filling the air as he fisted himself.

“Can I help?”

His gaze flicked to yours, skeptical. “Help how?”

You shrugged. “I dunno. What do you like?”

Joel tensed. “…The hell kinda question is that?”

“A valid one,” you shot back, tilting your head. “C’mon, there’s gotta be somethin’. What do you like?”

He hesitated, shifting where he stood, uncomfortable. You rattled off a few suggestions, some kinks you’d heard of. He barely reacted.

Then finally, one seemed to slap him upside the head, “Do you like dirty talk?”

His entire body stilled.

His eyes finally, finally found yours.

Bingo.

A slow pulse of heat curled low in your stomach.

You leaned forward slightly, voice softer now. “What kind of things do you say?”

He didn’t answer right away. Just stared at you, the tension in his jaw loosening, his pupils starting to widen.

“Come on, Joel,” you said, then immediately pressed your lips together, realizing you’d already broken one of your own rules—not even five minutes in.

“Sorry—” You exhaled, shaking your head. “But c’mon, do you want me to talk to you? Or what do you usually say to women?”

Joel’s eyes were suddenly burning into you, his chest rising and falling just a little heavier now. He exhaled sharply, remembering himself as his gaze flickered around the room like he wasn’t sure where to land it, like maybe if he didn’t look at you, this would stay clinical—mechanical.

“I uh…” He wet his lips, voice rough. “Usually will tell ‘em they’re bein’ real good for me,” he said, exhaling through his teeth. “Bein’ a good girl.”

The temperature of the room shifted, the air growing heavy, pressing down on you. A slow, pooling ache pulsed low in your belly. His nostrils flared as his eyes found yours again, like maybe he could see exactly what that did to you.

You swallowed, “What else?”

Joel’s hips twitched. He hesitated, his grip flexing around himself, fingers curling just slightly. You caught the bob of his throat, the faint shift of his stance. He was getting there.

His gaze dropped to your mouth. “Tell ‘em how pretty they look on their knees.” His voice had taken on a new weight—thicker, heavier, his drawl rolling low in his throat. “How sweet they sound when they moan for me. How bad I wanna feel ‘em wrapped around me, drippin’ and ready, beggin’ for more.”

The room contracted, the air impossibly tight, each breath harder to pull in. Your skin felt hot, your lips parting as you fought to keep your breathing steady. And you knew—knew—your pupils were wide, knew your face was flushed.

Because his was too.

His eyes had darkened, locked on yours, heat simmering beneath the surface. You inhaled deeply, the air between you charged, electric. You reached out, fingers grazing along his forearm. He tensed, muscles flexing beneath your touch, but he didn’t pull away.

“You wanna take this off?” you murmured, voice quiet but sure, fingers tracing up toward the sleeve of his shirt.

Joel let out a slow breath, something flickering behind his eyes—hesitation, uncertainty—but then, after a beat, he reached down and pulled his shirt over his head, dropping it to the floor.

Your gaze raked over him.

Christ. He was the epitome of masculinity—broad and solid, built like something carved from rough earth, from long years of labor and hardship. His chest was strong, lined with thick, dark hair that tapered down his stomach in a steady trail, leading lower—disappearing into the patch just above where he was hardening in his hand. 

Your mouth was dry, your pulse a slow, deliberate thrum in your veins.

You lifted your hands to the hem of your own shirt, pausing just slightly. He hadn’t looked away.

“Okay?” you asked softly.

His jaw flexed, gaze dark, unreadable—but after a second, he nodded.

You pulled it over your head, the fabric slipping away, baring more skin than you’d ever thought he’d see.

Joel exhaled sharply, his eyes dragging down your body, heavy and slow, his pupils swallowing the color of his eyes. Your nipples pebbled in the open air, a shiver running through you as his gaze settled there, his breath hitching just slightly.

You reached for him again, fingers trailing along the hard lines of his chest, dipping over the planes of his stomach. He was warm beneath your touch and he smelled like pine and musk and something richer, something leathered and sun-baked—something distinctly Joel.

He sucked in a sharp breath. “O—okay,” he exhaled, voice rough. “I think I’m… good,” he added shakily, and you could see his body finally catching up to the filth rolling off his tongue, the thick weight of him fully hard now. You swallowed dryly at the sheer size of him in his palm.

Standing slowly, your hands dropped from his body, but your eyes never left his as you slid your pants down your hips and let them pool at your feet.

Bare. You were both bare.

Your gaze dragged over him, from the broad stretch of his shoulders down to his stomach, the solid cut of his thighs, his cock standing thick and heavy between you. It was the most you’d ever seen of him. The most he’d ever seen of you.

And he was beautiful.

Joel swallowed hard, his jaw tight as his gaze traveled over every inch of you. Then, wordlessly, you laid back down on the bedspread, opening your legs for him.

He cursed under his breath.

You caught the way his throat bobbed, the way his fingers twitched at his sides before he climbed onto the bed after you, settling between your legs. His eyes darted down, locked onto the wetness pooling between your thighs, and his nostrils flared.

“All this from just a few sweet words, huh?” His voice was lower now, edged with something amused but dark, something he hadn’t meant to let slip through.

He shifted forward, but you stopped him with a hand to his chest.

“I, uh…” You cleared your throat, suddenly shy. “It’s said that women are more likely to get pregnant if, um… if they orgasm during or… or before, I think.”

Joel stilled for half a second before a slow smirk pulled at his lips. “You doubt me so much?”

The teasing edge in his voice—the cockiness—made some of the tension in your chest loosen. You let out a breathless laugh, your body unwinding slightly from the tension earlier. “I just… I’ve never…”

Something shifted in his face. The smirk faltered just a little. “You’re sayin’ my baby brother doesn’t take care of his own wife?”

“No!” you said quickly, your hand flexing against his chest defensively. “He does, it’s just… I can’t finish just from penetration. Most women can’t, actually.”

“I know, darlin’.”

You gasped as the thick head of his cock suddenly swiped through your slick arousal, and he hissed, pressing his other hand into the pillow beside your head as he leaned over you.

“Fuck—”

His voice was rough, gravelly, wrecked, and something about it made your thighs squeeze around his waist, made the heat coil even tighter in your belly.

Joel lingered there, his cock sliding through your slick, slow and deliberate, teasing against your swollen clit with every pass. The thick head caught at your entrance, nudging just slightly, and a gasp broke from your lips before you could swallow it down.

His jaw ticked, fingers flexing in the pillow beside your head, his body wound tight like a spring.

“This okay?” he asked, voice rough, strained.

You nodded quickly. “Yeah. Yes.”

He pressed forward, just an inch, just enough for you to feel the blunt stretch of him, and your breath hitched.

“Jesus,” he muttered under his breath. “So damn wet.”

Heat flooded your face, but you couldn’t think—couldn’t focus on anything other than how thick he was, how different he was from Tommy. You felt like you were being split in two, but you wanted more. Every inch only made that need, that hunger, grow.

His hand lifted from his cock, skimming over your hip before settling on your thigh, holding you open.

“Gotta take it slow,” he murmured, mostly to himself. “Don’t wanna hurt you.”

You swallowed hard, fingers curling into the sheets beside you. “I can take it.”

His head dropped for a second, a quiet curse slipping past his lips. “Don’t say shit like that, sweetheart.”

Something about that word, the way it left his mouth—low and full of something dangerous—made your stomach clench.

The stretch was slow, unbearable in the best way as he pushed forward even more, your body giving inch by inch, and you let out a sharp exhale as he filled you.

Joel groaned, deep and low, his fingers tightening on your thigh as he finally buried himself to the hilt.

Jesus Christ.

The weight of him inside you, the way he fit—it was overwhelming, taking up every inch of space, leaving you panting beneath him.

“Fuck,” he gritted out, his hips flush with yours now, his jaw tight. “You’re—shit, you’re squeezin’ me so damn tight.”

Your thighs trembled around his waist, your body working to adjust to the fullness, to the sheer size of him, and then—oh god—then he moved.

A slow pull out, a deep thrust back in.

You moaned, head falling back against the pillows, fingers flexing against the sheets.

Joel’s breath was ragged, his grip tightening. “That’s it.”

As he began to set a steady pace, a deep thrust in, a gentle pull out, the tingling sensation you knew all too well was rising fast—too fast. It climbed up your spine, coiling tight, and your breath hitched in your throat. The sensation was familiar, so familiar, but not like this. Not from this.

Joel moved with deep, deliberate thrusts, each one stretching you full, dragging against every oversensitive nerve inside you with agonizing precision. His cock was thick, heavy, unrelenting—pressing deep, pressing right, pleasure licking up your spine like fire.

His hand moved between you, thumb finding your clit with ease, the calloused pad brushing over the swollen bundle of nerves, a touch just firm enough to make you jolt. Your whole body reacted, thighs trembling, an involuntary gasp ripping from your lips.

His breath hitched as he felt it too, and he let out a dark, pleased hum.

“Feel that?” he murmured, his voice a slow, deliberate drag against your skin. His thumb moved again, slick and sure, working tight little circles against you. “Now, what was it you said again?”

Your chest heaved, your fingers gripping at the sheets, at him, anything to keep yourself tethered, because the pleasure was coming in hot, hard waves now—building, climbing, making your skin flush and prickle with heat.

“I—I never—” You gasped, voice breaking, lips parting as your back arched into the feeling, as you felt your muscles tighten and clench under him.

Joel leaned in, lips brushing against your ear. “C’mon, sweet girl. Use your words.”

Your hips met every thrust, dragging a moan from deep in your chest.

“I’ve never—ah!—never come like this before,” you choked out, breathless and desperate.

Joel swore under his breath.

“You’re tellin’ me,” he rasped, voice dripping in absolute filth and sin, “my pissy little brother never made you come on his cock before?”

The shame of it—the filthy, shameless truth of it—slammed into you just as hard as the pleasure. Your breath came in short, stilted gasps, your thighs twitching, heat curling low and tight, twisting like a wire pulled too taut. You gripped his biceps hard where they caged you in, your nails digging into his skin.

“I–”

“Never felt the way you’re squeezin’ the life outta me right now, baby?” His voice dipped lower, rougher, as his thumb pressed, rubbing slow and tight. “Never had you like this? Drippin’ and desperate? Makin’ the prettiest fuckin’ sounds I’ve ever heard?”

Heat flared in your belly, your legs shaking around him, pleasure tearing through you.

Joel felt it, the way you clenched down around him, and he grinned, breath hot against your mouth as he groaned through his teeth.

“Fuck—that’s it. Let me feel you.”

And you did.

Your body suddenly snapped. The orgasm slammed into you, white-hot and merciless, every nerve in your body firing at once, blinding you with pleasure so intense it was nearly unbearable. Your breath punched from your lungs as your back arched clean off the bed, thighs trembling, a cry tearing from your lips as waves of heat crashed through you.

Joel swore under his breath, hips stuttering as you clenched tight around him, and his mouth hovered just above yours, his breath mixing with yours, the air between you thick and electric.

He felt the way your body fluttered around him, still pulsing with the comedown of your orgasm, dragging him deeper, tighter—trapping him. His breath was heavy, coming in sharp, ragged exhales as he dropped his head, his forehead resting against yours.

His hips kept moving quick and uneven, dragging his cock in and out of your still-clenching walls. He was throbbing, thick and hot inside you, every roll of his hips sending sharp little sparks of overstimulation through your system.

That was when, after coming back to earth, you saw the way his lips parted slightly, his breath hitching whenever you squeezed around him just right. The tension in his face, the way his muscles coiled and flexed with every deliberate movement.

He was close.

You wondered…

Your breath was still shaky, voice unsteady, but you let it slip out, slow and sultry, testing the waters, “You feel so good,” you whispered.

Joel froze for a split second, a sharp breath punching from his lungs as he reeled his head back to look down at you.

"Does it feel good for you?” you whispered, your fingers trailing up the nape of his neck. “Filling me up? Making me feel so full? So good?”

Joel let out a ragged, wrecked sound, his fingers digging into your skin, gripping you like a lifeline.

And in that moment—fuck the rules.

Because this was anything but clinical now.

You pressed a soft kiss to his jaw, letting your breath fan against his ear as you whispered, gentle, teasing.

“You gonna give me a baby, Joel?”

Joel let out a wrecked groan, his grip on your hips tightening, his pace faltering. His thrusts turned rougher, sharper, his body moving on pure instinct now—chasing it.

And then he snapped.

A strangled moan ripped from his throat as he slammed deep, burying himself to the hilt, his cock pulsing inside you as heat flooded you. His whole body shook, a ragged, guttural sound tearing from his chest as he came, thick and hot, spilling deep, his fingers flexing against your hips like he was trying to ground himself.

You gasped at the feeling, at the warmth spreading inside you, at the way his body shook above you.

Joel was panting, forehead pressed to yours, sweat damp at his hairline, his breath fanning against your lips, warm and unsteady.

For a long moment, neither of you moved.

Joel was still inside you, still filling you, his weight pressing you into the mattress, grounding you. His breath was heavy, warm against your cheek as he turned his head, his chest rising and falling against yours in slow, uneven waves.

“I should, uh…” His voice was hoarse, thick with something he wasn’t naming. He swallowed, clearing his throat as he sat up. “I should probably—”

You shifted slightly beneath him, still sensitive, still pulsing with the warmth of him inside you. Your thighs trembled, the ache delicious, spreading through you like slow heat.

“You can go,” you murmured, voice soft, a little sleepy. “I’m gonna stay here for a while.”

He hesitated as he looked down at you, your bodies still connected. 

You blinked up at him, lips curving in a lazy, satisfied smile.

“It’s said that if a woman stays lying down after, it increases the chances of conception.” You hummed, stretching slightly, body still warm and loose. “Just want to give it time to stick.”

You felt him twitch inside you, like his body had just caught up to the meaning of your words, and then he was pulling out, hissing under his breath as he eased away from you.

His heat vanished instantly, and a shiver ran through you at the sudden emptiness, the cool air replacing where he’d been pressed so solidly against you. You exhaled, tugging the covers up over yourself, shifting deeper into the mattress, letting your body sink into the afterglow.

Joel, on the other hand, was already moving, and fast.

He turned away from the bed, running a hand through his hair, reaching for his jeans like he needed them back on, needed the barrier, needed to be done with this.

“Hey,” you called softly as he stepped toward the door, one leg shoved into his pants.

He paused, turning slightly, just enough to look at you over his shoulder.

You blinked up at him sleepily, the blankets pulled up to your bare shoulders, your voice softer now. “You okay?”

Joel hesitated. Just for a second.

His hands hovered at his belt, his fingers twitching. His lips pressed together, like he was weighing his answer, like he didn’t trust whatever was sitting heavy on his tongue.

Then, he gave you a short, stiff nod. “Yeah. ‘M good.”

You hummed, unconvinced, watching the way his chest still rose and fell in uneven breaths, the lingering flush at his throat, the tension in his hands as he buckled his belt like he was fighting something.

“Okay,” you murmured, turning your head into the pillow, eyes half-lidded, “And, Joel?”

His gaze flickered back to you, hovering, like he was bracing himself.

You swallowed, shifting slightly under the blankets, warmth settling deep in your bones. “Thank you.”

Joel’s fingers twitched where they grabbed for his shirt, his throat working around something thick, something stuck. His eyes dragged over you one last time, heavy, unreadable, before he gave a single, curt nod.

“I’ll see you,” he muttered, voice rough, almost hesitant.

Then he turned, and with the sound of the door clicking shut behind him, he was gone.

[tojicide]

JEALOU$Y. ☆ CALEB.

𝑠𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑦. at the end of the day, you and caleb are just childhood friends—nothing more, nothing less. so, when you mention going on a date, it’s totally logical that he wouldn’t care, right? if only that were the truth.

𝑤𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠. fem!reader, current!caleb, zayne mention, jealousy, pet names, praise, oral ( fem. receiving ), cowgirl, unprotected p in v, creampie. 𝑤𝑐. 5.4k.

𝑛𝘰𝑤 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑦𝑖𝑛𝑔. jealou$y — the neighbourhood.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ✧ masterlist | request

Doomsday has finally dawned upon Linkon City, though Caleb seems to be the only person truly affected by this catastrophe.

It was all his fault in the grand scheme of things. He hadn’t been clear enough, hadn’t shown the full extent of his feelings for you. But above all, he should have never offered Zayne those measly words of advice.

He should have known that the doctor had ulterior motives. Why else would he have called Caleb up one week ago to ask about you of all people?

It was a mean ploy, truly. Anyone and everyone knows about Caleb’s inability to shut up about you, his sole weakness was being exploited right in front of his eyes and he was none the wiser. The questions seemed harmless then. Posed as genuine curiosity, Caleb would have never been able to decipher the hidden intent behind each word that Zayne spoke into the receiver.

What are her days off? What does she do in her free time? You said that the restaurant around the corner from Akso Hospital was her favorite, yes?

In retrospect, he should have absolutely seen this coming. But then again, nothing could have ever prepared Caleb to hear those four life-altering words slipping from your lips.

“I have a date.”

A record scratches in his brain, forcing him to halt his steps for an abnormally long time before he slowly turns to face you. “You… what?”

Hearing the words repeated in that saccharine tone of yours only added salt to the wound, oddly enough. It physically pained him to ask for more information about your date, though he managed to hide his disdain with that boyish grin of his and a bit of lighthearted teasing.

But inside? That little green monster was stirring, and there was very little he could do to quell it.

Begrudgingly, he managed to get the key details before forcing himself to stow away in his bedroom and… think. Next Thursday. 6 PM. Maltosio Restaurant. With Zayne.

The next week passed by in an agonizingly slow fashion. It was as though each X that marked a passing day was a physical blow to his already aching heart, and those adorable images of the kittens on his calendar (the calendar that you picked out) did very little to help him.

Subtlety was never his strong suit, but then again, desperate times call for desperate measures. And believe Caleb when he says that he is very much desperate.

“Soo…” he’d drawl, leaning over the back of the couch to peer down at you. “I heard there’s a screening of that movie you’ve been wanting to see at the drive-in next Thursday. Wanna come with?”

You perked up like a ball of excitement, and for a moment, Caleb allowed himself to get his hopes up, but your frown quickly dissipated them. “Next Thursday? Oh, no, I can’t make it! I’m going out with Zayne, remember?”

Of course he remembered. That was exactly why he hadn’t let up—not even once—in his attempts to distract you just enough to make you forget all about your dinner plans. He could take you out for a nice dinner too. Say, that’s actually a good idea…

The next day, Caleb tried that one.

“Oh, pip-squeak,” he sang, his airy voice ringing through your apartment as he walked down the hallway. “I got us reservations at the restaurant in Skyhaven that you’ve been itchin’ to check out.”

You perked up, just like you did before. “Really?”

He nodded with a triumphant grin, internally patting himself on the back for his own good idea. “Mm-hmm. Next Thursday. Got us those window seats you wanted too—the ones that overlook the city.”

And once again, your gaze softened, and an all-too-adorable pout tugged at the corners of your mouth. “Oh, Caleb, I’m sorry. I’m busy that day.”

You really are too sweet for your own good. He can’t even blame Zayne for taking an interest in you, he’d be downright shocked if any man with two seeing eyes had the audacity to not think that you were the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

Caleb sure does. He always has. He always will.

It wasn’t long before the day of reckoning was upon him. Thursday evening. Sunlight cut through the blinds in the living room, casting golden hues across the vast space. Much to his dismay, the trashy reality television you’d left on the screen did very little to soothe his worries.

He fidgeted with the dog chains you’d gifted him, his thumb brushing along the gift that you had so kindly given him. It was a testament to your bond. A bond that something as trivial as a single evening apart couldn’t tamper with… right?

“Caleb!” Your antsy voice cut through the air, forcing his wandering mind to snap back to reality.

He was up and down the hallway before you could even say another word, pressing a flat hand to your door to nudge it open. It was then that he saw you, all dolled up in your robe with your favorite dresses laid out on your bed.

Your hands grasp onto two of the hangers, holding them up side-by-side to help him get a better look at them. Though, his eyes were noticeably distracted, contorted in an unfamiliar lovesick expression as they pierced into yours. “Quick! Which do you think is cuter?”

Caleb blinks—once, twice, three times—until he forces himself to finally look down at the dress options in your grasp. He’d seen you wear them plenty of times before, and the thought of someone else seeing you in such beautiful fabric nearly made his stomach lurch.

He raises his forearm, leaning against the doorframe as he rubs the back of his neck. “Oh, c’mon, that’s an impossible choice. You’ll look beautiful no matter what you wear.”

It was a typical response, one that you were expecting, though his lack of advice made you hmph as you lost yourself in your thoughts. “Well… I hear polka dots symbolize happiness and stripes symbolize slipping between realms. Pretty interesting stuff, huh?”

“Very interesting,” he says, the corner of his mouth tugging up at the mere sound of your voice. “Is that why you buy so many things in those patterns?”

You quirk an eyebrow, confusion etching into your expression. “Huh? What else do I buy that’s…” It quickly dawns on you, and you can feel heat creep up your neck and reach your face. “You’re a jerk.”

Caleb can’t help but laugh, taking a few steps into the room so that he can properly look at each and every one of the dress options laid out on your bed. “What’s the matter? If I remember correctly, someone was beggin’ me to do her laundry. Somethin’ about the laundry machine being sooo far and your feet hurting sooo bad.”

Huffing and far too flustered for your own good, you shake your head. “Well… well I didn’t realize you were so observant.”

He clicks his tongue, absentmindedly pinching your side as he leans down to rest his chin in the dip of your shoulder. “Tsk. You know I’m always observant when it comes to you. Even if it’s remembering something as trivial as the patterns of your cute little undies.”

You swat him away. “You’re so annoying!”

To that, he can only chuckle, giving your sides a brief squeeze before taking a few steps back. “Alriiight, alright, I’ll leave you alone.” Before exiting the room entirely, he hangs onto the doorframe, giving you a soft smile. “I’m serious though. You’ll look beautiful no matter what you wear.” His lips curve into a smirk. “But if you want my input—you know I’ve always been a sucker for seeing you in florals.”

And with that, he whisks away, silently hoping and praying that this date will fall through on its own. Plopping back down on the couch, his eyes are practically glued to his watch. 5:48 PM. It wouldn’t be long before Zayne would be knocking at the front door—punctual as ever. Oh, it made him sick.

How could he have done this? To you, to himself? Caleb should be ashamed. He should be the one sitting across from you later tonight, holding your hand and listening to you ramble about whatever your heart desires. It should be him. It would have been him if he wasn’t so damn afraid.

But the sound of approaching heels clicking along the hardwood floor quickly snapped him out of his pity party, prompting him to look over his shoulder. And there you were once again, now adorned in a floral sundress that had made him lose his mind more times than he’d like to admit.

Under his breath, he can’t help but mutter, “Yeah, you’re gonna kill me…”

It was his favorite dress of yours, too. You really were trying to kill him. A white dress that was littered with blue flowers, the fabric fit you perfectly, loose and fitted in all of the right places.

Zayne didn’t deserve to see you like this. Plain and simple.

Standing from the couch, he lets out a low, appreciative whistle. “There she is,” he says, taking your hand to spin you around a single time. His smile only widens as he sees yours. “You look gorgeous, just like I knew you would.”

You roll your eyes with a bashful smile, one that he has to physically fight the urge to kiss away. “Oh, you flatter me,” you say through a laugh.

He shakes his head, bringing a hand up to gently smooth down a pesky hair on the top of your head. “Can’t be flattery if I mean every word of it.”

A breeze wafted through the open window, blowing the fabric of your dress ever so slightly. The scent of freshly cut grass and blooming flowers infiltrates the living room, though the scent of your perfume and something that was uniquely you had his full attention.

“Y’know, you can be pretty nice when you want to be,” you say, raising an eyebrow.

Chuckling, he simply nods, his large hands settling on your middle. “Yeah. When I want to be.”

You brush past him, padding over to the back door. Pushing it open, you step out onto the warm concrete patio, breathing in the fresh air that the backyard had to offer you. Spring in Linkon was always a delight, though the warmth that Caleb radiates behind you serves to be the most comforting thing about the entire scene.

His hand comes to rest on the curve of your shoulder, his fingers nimbly pulling at one of the straps of your dress. With his heart rate shooting through the roof, he forces himself to take a moment. He needs to get this right. This may be the last chance he’ll be able to do this.

“I… look, there’s something that I—”

But suddenly, the sound of rapping knuckles at the front door cuts through the tense silence. Both of your attention is drawn to the closed door, and having left the back door open, you both have a clear view of it.

You turn around to face Caleb, offering him a sheepish smile. “That’s probably Zayne.”

He only nods, forcing his hand to fall back to his side. “Yeah, probably.”

This was it. He was losing you. It stung to know that this was no one’s fault apart from his own. His inability to be honest about his feelings, his lack of forwardness with you… what was he expecting? That you’d never date? That he could keep you happy forever without offering you anything more?

It was a stupid fantasy, one that had earned him this spot. But when he saw you turn to leave, your eyes still locked on his, a surge of panic shot up his spine. His eyes flit around—the grass, the flowerbeds, the hose… that was currently filling up the pool…

“Be mad at me later,” he suddenly says.

Your eyebrows shoot up. “Wha— ah!”

Before you could even begin to process what was happening, you were suddenly pushed back into the chamber full of chlorine infested water. Caleb watches with a wry expression as you shoot up from beneath the water, splashing aimlessly as you swim towards the edge.

“What the fuck was that?” you bark, perching one elbow up onto the concrete as you reach the other one out to him. “What the hell are you looking at? Help me out!”

Caleb can’t even protest, not with the incredibly irrational stunt he’d just pulled. “I’m sorry, pip-squeak, I just…” And so, he reaches down, his hand clasping around yours… until you pull him forward with all of your strength and send him tumbling into the pool too.

And when he comes up for air, you splash him the moment he opens his eyes. Serves him right. The chlorine will sting his eyes almost as much as your mascara is stinging yours right now.

With that, you pull yourself out of the pool, a trail of water marking your path as you wring out the fabric of your dress. After that, you disappear inside of the house, leaving Caleb to rub his eyes in utter defeat.

He gives you both a long stretch of alone time before he retreats back into the house like a kicked puppy, his head hanging low as he runs a hand through his wet strands of hair. You’ve evidently told Zayne that today wasn’t going to work anymore, judging by his lack of presence, and that thought alone makes Caleb more happy than he should be.

Sucking in a short breath, he knocks twice at your shut bedroom door. “Honey? It… it’s me.”

“Go away,” you retort without missing a single beat.

Caleb pokes his tongue into his cheek as he leans forward, resting his forehead on the cool surface of your bedroom door. “C’mon. Just… talk to me.”

It doesn’t take long before the door is swung open, revealing an incredibly angry version of you with a freshly cleaned face. He opens his mouth to speak, to apologize, to try and rectify the situation in any way he can, but you beat him to it. Quickly.

“How dare you?” you spit, jabbing your index finger into his chest. “What was that, Caleb? Are we ten years old again? Your method of communication is… is pushing me into the damn pool?”

He sighs, catching your hand to unfold your closed fingers. “You’re right. I’m sorry, I—”

“No!” you cut him off, sticking your other index finger into his chest. “It’s your turn to listen. You’ve been my best friend for as long as I can remember, you’re all I’ve ever known, all I’ve ever wanted. Do you know how it feels to have everything you want dangled in front of you for so many years, and… and just torn away? Time and time again?”

Caleb is rendered speechless, his brows furrowed in both confusion and a sense of odd relief as you unleash all of the thoughts that you’ve kept hidden for so long. He doesn’t bother catching your other hand, instead, he allows you to repeatedly jab at his chest. It hurts, but he can handle it. Just like he can handle the words you’re saying.

“So, you know what? I decided that enough was enough!” you continue, your index finger pressing wildly into the hard planes of his chest. “I wasn’t going to wait around, I wasn’t going to pretend, I was going to move on! And… and I was going to!”

He tilts his head, his amethyst eyes growing fuzzy as he looks down at you. “Was going to?”

You huff, eyes narrowing as you jab your finger into his chest for a final time before turning away from him. “Well, I’m not exactly going on a date anymore, am I?”

Caleb nods, though you can’t see it. He leans against the doorframe, his gaze tracing your silhouette through the soaked fabric of your dress. Sighing, he straightens off the wall, but before he can turn away, you spin around to face him.

“And you know what else?” you huff. “You know the solution to this problem just as well as I do.”

He nods his head with a single jerk of his chin, beckoning you to continue. “Yeah? What’s that?”

You step closer, and for the final time, you stab your finger into his pec. “You need to grow a pair.”

Inhaling deeply, all he can do is smile. It infuriates you and he knows it, but he just can’t help himself. He takes both of your wrists and tugs you forward until your chest presses against his own, one of his hands coming up to cup your cheek.

You’re slowly simmering down, the heat of your outburst dissipating as your skin cooled. With your eyebrows still furrowed, all you can do is look up at him, daring him to speak. To do anything.

“Are you still mad at me?” he asks, brushing a thumb over your bottom lip.

Swallowing thickly, you nod. “A little.”

He slowly nods his head, his fingers curving along your jaw before he cups your chin in between his thumb and forefinger. “Is there anything I can do to help with that?”

You can feel his breath fan along your lips, cool and minty and just about everything you could have ever fantasized about on your own. You part your lips to reply, but this time, Caleb is the one who beats you to it.

“We’re making puddles all over the floor, you know.”

Glancing down, you see the truth in his words. The pool water dripped from your respective clothing and gathered around the two of you, making a wry smile find your lips.

“Oh,” you breathe, “I didn’t even notice.”

“I like to think I’m pretty observant when it comes to you,” he murmurs, smoothing his free hand along your side until it grasps onto the fabric of your dress. “Need some help with this?”

You look up, meeting his gaze once more. “With… with what?”

“Well,” he drawls, his fingertips brushing along your outer thigh as he slowly drags the fabric upward. His movements are hesitant and cautious, his eyes flickering between each of yours. “You’re wet. I’m wet. Maybe we can… help each other dry off.”

Your eyelids falter as they flit between his, your gaze instinctively falling to the plush curve of his bottom lip. “Okay,” you murmur.

A smile tugs at his mouth. “Okay. Arms up.”

Slowly, you lift your arms above your head. His hands work together to slowly push the fabric of your dress up and over your head, letting it slip onto the floor with a wet plop.

His breath is nearly torn from his lungs the moment he sees your bare skin, so beautiful and soft and made to be his. Hesitantly, his fingertips trace the curve of your hips with a sense of reverence.

“Do you need help too?” you ask, your voice breathy from the restrained sense of need that has come over you.

Pausing his exploration of your bare skin, Caleb finds himself nodding, almost immediately lifting his arms over his head. “Please.”

And now, you take the opportunity to do the same. Slowly, you peel his shirt up and over his head, tossing it aimlessly into the laundry hamper near the door. Your gaze traces over the defining lines of his abdomen, your touch doing the same as it trails southward.

His lower stomach tenses up as your fingers brush against the hem of his jeans. He can’t help the way his eyes flutter shut, the way a touch so simple can nearly bring him to his knees. Breathing shakily, he leans down to rest his forehead on yours.

“Careful,” he breathes in warning, his voice taking on a raspy tone.

You almost startle at the unfamiliarity of his voice, though you push your hesitation aside as your thumb brushes over the button of his pants. “But… these are wet too.”

A huff of air leaves his mouth, the sound something between a low laugh and a groan. He forces his eyes open, his stare meeting your own. “Trying to get me naked before our first kiss? I have to say, you’re full of surprises.”

Faltering, your hands fall away from his pants. “You’re right, I… I’m—”

Caleb can’t help but chuckle, taking a hold of your hands to bring them right back to where they were before. This time, he guides your fingers through the motion of unbuttoning his pants. “Kidding,” he whispers against your lips. “Besides… we’re good at multitasking, yeah?”

You’re nodding before you can truly process his words. “Yeah.”

His lips crash onto yours with a groan that omits from deep within, the button of his jeans finally popping open from your ministry. The zipper went next, tugged down along with the fabric entirety until he was left in only his boxers.

His hands roam your curves greedily, eating up every inch of skin that he has deprived himself of for far too long. Your waist, your hips, your thighs—he needs to feel you in any way possible.

And you return his eagerness so well, wrapping your arms around his neck as you draw him in even closer. His hands worked quickly, hoisting you up until your legs wrapped around his waist as he walked the both of you over to your bed.

Laying you down on the mattress, he takes the initiative to deepen the kiss, his tongue swiping along your bottom lip to gain access that you readily give him. He can’t help but moan into your mouth, the sweet taste of your tongue tangling with his own forcing his brain to short circuit in a way he’s never experienced before.

You kissed him like there was no tomorrow, and he was loving every second of it. Your hands fisted into his hair while your lips moved in tandem with his, a soft whimper leaving your mouth as his hands gave your hips a firm squeeze.

His lips trail down your jaw, leaving open-mouthed kisses along your neck and the curve of your shoulder as he uses his grip on your hips to pull you flush against him. A gasp leaves you at the feeling of his erection pressing against your clothes sex, the friction so delicious that it makes butterflies erupt in your stomach.

Caleb is so far gone, kissing his way along your arms, your neck, your sternum, all up until he reaches the valley of your breasts. He wastes very little time there, licking a trail to your nipple before sucking the peak into his mouth. His other hand palms at your other breast, kneading the soft flesh in his palm.

“You’re so beautiful,” he breathes against your skin, his hips rocking forward as he switches sides, latching onto your neglected breast and giving it a hard suck. “So beautiful.”

His descent continues as he mouths at the soft skin of your belly, your hips, your inner thighs. His eyes depart from yours as they settle onto the fabric covering your cunt, and a grin stretches across his face. Polka dots.

You scoff, softly shoving his shoulder. “Don’t even say it.”

Chuckling, he leans in to press a kiss on the damp patch of fabric. “Wasn’t gonna say anything, baby.”

His fingers hook beneath the waistband of your panties, tugging them down your legs and tossing them aimlessly. His lips press feverish kisses to your ankles, your calves, your inner thighs, and eventually, the mound of your pussy.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this,” he whispers into your heat, hiking your legs up and over his shoulders and he pulls your sex closer to his mouth. “So damn worth it.”

A cry leaves you as his tongue delves in deep between your legs, his eyes slipping shut as he lets out an unabashed whimper into your sex. His grip on your thighs only tightens, keeping your legs spread apart as they threaten to press in on his head.

He wouldn’t have that. He couldn’t. He needed to have you in the way that he’s dreamt of for so long, in the way that he’s thought of time and time again as he fucked his own fist to the thought of you. It was filthy, it was lewd, but it was honest.

You tasted better than he could have ever imagined, his tongue eagerly lapping at your inner walls before his lips sealed around your puffy clit, sucking hard enough to make your back bow off the plush mattress.

The stimulation is leaving you feeling overwhelmed, your hands pushing into his hair as your trembling thighs test the strength of his grip. You whine, eyes slipping shut as your head tilts back against the pillows.

“It— it’s too much—”

“Be good,” he finds himself saying, pulling you right back to his mouth as he continues to feast on your pussy like a man starved. “You can take it, baby.” Caleb cracks open his eyes, sucking harshly onto your clit before releasing it with a wet pop. “Go on, pretty girl. Say it.”

You whine, though you hardly have the brain power to say anything else apart from what he’s asked of you. “I… I can take it,” you breathe.

He smiles, pressing a soft kiss to your sensitive pearl before nipping at it. “There you go.”

It doesn’t take much longer for your legs to begin to tremble once more, your body writhing in his grasp as he sets you any way but loose. Your hips buck up, a final resort for reprieve as he works you over the edge.

Caleb redoubled his efforts, spreading your thighs even wider. Soon, the warmth pooling in your lower stomach was far too much to bear, far more intense than anything you had ever experienced before.

“I’m… I’m coming,” you gasp out, hands gripping tightly onto his dark locks of hair.

And when you do, his flattened tongue laps at your honeyed release. He works you through your high, his movements eventually slowing down as the twitching of your hips gradually calms.

He pulls off of you with a wet pop, pressing soft kisses to your swollen clit. “You’re perfect,” he whispers, pressing another peck on your mound before he moves back up your body once more to slot his lips against yours.

You can taste yourself on his tongue, and it only spurs you on further. Your hands grasp onto his shoulders, and in one swift motion, you flip him onto his back. Caleb looks up at you with a starry-eyed expression, but when you straddle his hips and sit in his lap, he has no words of protest. None at all.

“You really are full of surprises,” he says, running his hands along the warm skin of your thighs.

Tugging him free from his boxers, he helps you remove them from his body, leaving you both entirely bare together. He sits up, his back pressing against the headboard as he tugs you closer to him.

“I need you,” he whispers, pressing a longing kiss on your stomach as you shift to straddle him once more. “Please, baby.”

You gaze down at him, your fingers brushing through his hair. “Please what?”

He leans into your touch, his hands settling onto your waist as he pulls you lower, the head of his cock pressing against your pussy. “Make yourself feel good. Please.”

Caleb’s own cheeks were flushed with a rosy hue, both from the embarrassment that his own lack of experience brought upon him and the reality of finally having the love of his life in such an intimate way. His amethyst eyes search your face, as if searching for a permission that he didn’t know how to ask for.

Dipping your head, you press a soft kiss on his lips. Simultaneously, you swivel your hips until the tip of his length catches your entrance. You slowly lower yourself, feeling the way his cock stretches you out, filling you up in a way that only he can.

He smiles at you, cupping your cheek with his hand. Brushing a thumb over your bottom lip, he kisses you gently. “You feel so good,” he whimpers into your mouth, his other hand resting on your hip as you roll your hips in a way that has his breath hitching in his throat. “So fucking perfect.”

Your movements are timid at first, consisting of a slow and meticulous rocking of your hips. His cock stuffed you full, his tip kissing the deepest points of your inner walls with ease, earning a muffled whimper from your mouth that his lips swallowed up eagerly.

Caleb’s hands grasped tightly onto your hips, helping you set a pace that had the both of you losing your mind. He leans backward, his head tilting against the headboard as it slams against the wall with each intense grind of your hips.

“Good girl, give it to me how you like it,” he breathes, eyes cracking open to watch the way you look down at him as you work yourself on his length. “Use me however you need me, baby, there you go.”

Your fingers thread into his hair, pulling him in for a longing kiss. “I… you— you feel so…” you stammer, leaning forward to rest your head on his shoulder as you lose yourself on his cock.

He nods his head in agreement, turning his head to press a kiss on your damp cheek as he gently pets your hair. “I know, I know.”

You lose yourself all together, your legs shaking as you tighten your hold on him. “Caleb!” you moan.

His hips help you the rest of the way, his grip on your hips keeping you firmly planted as he meets your movements with thrusts of his own. “I know it, baby, I’ve got you,” he pants through a smile, guiding you through a few more fleshed out grinds on his lap. “Atta girl, use those hips.”

His arms wrap around you entirely, crushing you against the hard planes of his chest as you slowly ride the both of you through your shared orgasm. In that moment, in your house, in this space that belonged to you and Caleb alone—the two of you became one.

Heavy breathing and hammering heartbeats is all that consumes the two of you for a long while, skin to skin with far too much bliss brewing in your chests for either of you to handle alone.

Huffing softly, Caleb runs a hand up your side. “You okay in there?” he asks, turning his head to pepper soft kisses along your cheek. “C’mon, I need some proof of life.”

You chuckle, shaking your head as you bury your face into the crook of his neck. “Shut up, give me a second.”

He merely smiles, wrapping his arms around your middle once more as he tucks your head beneath his chin. Thirty seconds after finishing and you’re already mean. “There’s my girl.”

Caleb’s hands smooth over the soft planes of your back, giving your hips a soft squeeze as he revels in the feeling of your heartbeat drumming against his own. He can’t help himself from pressing a few kisses on the top of your head, his arms opting to wrap even tighter around you.

“I love—” he cuts himself off, eyes widening dazedly. Would that be too much? A confession of his undying love not long after ruining your date and making love with you for the first time? After a stretch of awkward silence, he kisses your head once more. “I love… cuddling with you. You’re so soft.”

You smile, nuzzling even closer to his chest, your nose brushing against skin. “Mm, I love you too, Caleb.”

His eyes widened, though he knows that communicating his confusion is futile. You knew him so well, too well.

“You do?” he whispers, turning his head just enough to look down at you.

In response to that, you nod. “Mm-hmm. I’ll love you even more if you tell me that you didn’t cancel those dinner reservations.”

Caleb smiles, running a hand over your hair. As if he’d given up his last ditch effort to take you out. “You know I didn’t.”

𝑛𝘰𝘵𝑒. rip zayne i still love you king!!! also i actually don’t really know how to write for caleb… so… i hope this didn’t suck! this is the only fic that managed to break my intense writer’s block that i’ve had for the past two months. reblog/comment if you enjoyed, i appreciate you reading so much <3

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ✧ masterlist | request

[ariichive]

JEALOUSY☆゜・。。・゜゜・。。・゜★

jealous scenarios ft. phainon, anaxa, and mydei!

gen. neutral reader

cw: anaxa is kinda crazy he puts his gun to reader, possessiveness, mentions of violence, fluff, not proofread im so tired :')

☆゜・。。・゜゜・。。・゜★

phainon

phainon was one to pride himself on his natural charm, he was a very easy going guy. the stark contrast between him in battle and off was admirable.

though as much as he hates to admit it, sometimes the warrior takes over his instincts. for instance, right now as he watched the droma’s caretaker openly flirt with you.

it wasn’t just the flirting—though that was annoying enough—it was the way you laughed, the way your eyes softened, the way you didn’t immediately pull away. phainon knew you weren’t his, not in the way that would justify this sudden surge of possessiveness. but logic had never been good at taming instinct.

his fingers twitched at his side, an old habit from years of battle. the part of him that thrived in combat, the part that didn’t hesitate when faced with a challenge, whispered at him to act. it would be so easy to step in, to slide an arm around your waist, to make it clear to everyone in the room—especially to the man standing too close—that you weren’t available.

but that wasn’t his place. not yet, at least. so instead, he forced himself to take a breath, to unclench his fists, to remind himself that he was phainon—charming, laid-back, not the type to pick a fight over something so trivial.

“phainon, this one likes me!”

his stoic expression softened when he realized, in fact, you were talking about the loving dromas and not that man.

phainon smiled gently at your joy, “i can tell, he sure does like you a lot!”

there was a certain edge to his voice that could’ve been missed by onlookers. you gave him a concerned glance, one which he smiled at and didn’t question further.

and yet, when the caretaker let out another laugh, explaining the most basic knowledge of dromas ever, his hand brushing against yours, phainon found himself smiling again. it wasn’t a friendly smile.

“having fun?” he asked, voice smooth but carrying an edge beneath it as he finally approached the two of you.

“yeah—!” you were quick to respond only to look up at phainon and realize his attention wasn’t on you. “phainon..”

“yes my lovely spouse, who i treasure more than any riches and i’d also kill for?” now his attention was focused on you, his smile bittersweet.

the thing with phainon is whenever he looked at you, there was always such intensity.

“don’t start, i’m okay i promise.”

there was a joking tilt to your voice, but it was enough to calm him down.

“now, come over and feed the dromas with me! this one’s name is castor, very sweet we should take him home!”

phainon let out a dramatic sigh, placing a hand over his heart. "my love, as much as i would adore bringing castor home, i fear he would not fit through our door."

you laughed, reaching out to pet the dromas, who nuzzled into your touch affectionately. "we could make it work," you teased, "build a bigger door, you're strong enough. or, you know, just let him live in our backyard."

phainon hummed in thought, stepping closer until he was right beside you. "tempting," he mused, reaching out to pet castor. "but then i’d have to compete for your affection, and i don’t think my heart could take it."

you rolled your eyes, nudging him playfully. "oh, please. you already know you’re my favorite."

his grin softened into something more genuine, his blue eyes filled with something tender. "good. because my dearest, you are mine." phainon swears the dromas narrowed its eyes at him (the caretaker did too but phainon was too busy enjoying the memoment with you to get mad all over again).

you burst into laughter as the dromas let out a soft sound, clearly pleased with itself. "maybe if you were as cute as them, you’d stand a chance."

phainon clutched his chest. "wounded. utterly wounded."

but despite his theatrics, he leaned in closer, his hand brushing against yours as you both continued to feed the dromas together, the warmth between you as steady as ever.

...

"y'know, maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea to take one home, then we wouldn't have to come back here. i can't believe that vile man had the nerve to even look at you..!"

"phainon, my dear, we are not actually going to take one home."

"...i like the name kevin, wouldn't you agree, [name]?"

the rest of the day was spent with phainon in your ear.

☆゜・。。・゜゜・。。・゜★

anaxa

the carefully crafted lunched in your hands was the least of your worries as a soft click was heard from behind you followed by a pressure being applied to the back of your head.

just to think; you went out of your way to bring lunch to your oh-so-kind boyfriend and this is how he greets you?

you would say you're surprised but... this isn't the first time something like this has happened.

"do tell me, what's the foul mood for now?"

he didn't appreciate the snarky comment as the gun pushed against your head even more.

"my [name], you seemed to enjoy yourself outside with that man. would i be correct to assume so?"

so this is what he's mad about.

you exhaled slowly, resisting the urge to roll your eyes. "if you must know, i was just making conversation. you know, something normal people do?"

the gun pressed harder against your skull in response, the warning clear. anaxa hated being mocked.

"careful," he murmured, voice quieter now, more dangerous. "i'm already being generous by allowing you to explain yourself. do not test my patience."

you tilted your head slightly, just enough to catch a glimpse of him from the corner of your eye. his expression was unreadable, but his grip on the gun was steady—too steady.

"allowing me to explain myself?" you echoed, amusement creeping into your tone. "and here i thought my oh-so-loving boyfriend would trust me a little more by now."

anaxa exhaled sharply through his nose, but he said nothing. the silence stretched between you for a few moments before the pressure at the back of your head finally disappeared.

anaxa let out a low hum, his voice smooth yet laced with something sharp—jealousy, possessiveness, something only he could wield so effortlessly. "you know how i feel about you entertaining the company of other men," he said, tilting his head slightly. "and yet, there you were, laughing as if you had no care in the world."

you sigh, "i promise you it was a very brief interaction. i even told him i was visiting you for lunch."

anaxa looked away in faux annoyance as he gently took the lunch from your hands.

"thank you, [name]." anaxa was genuine in his thanks, he understood how troublesome it could be to reach him in the grove of epiphany.

you rolled your eyes, crossing your arms. "i'd say 'you're welcome,' but i'm not sure you deserve it after that stunt."

he sighed dramatically, setting the lunch down on his desk before taking a seat. his movements were as measured as ever, graceful even in something as simple as this. "you wound me, truly," he drawled, undoing the buttons of his cuffs and rolling his sleeves up. "but i suppose my cruelty knows no bounds, does it? threatening my beloved over something as insignificant as a passing interaction."

"so you admit it was ridiculous?" you quirked a brow, leaning against the edge of his desk.

anaxa leaned back slightly in his chair, watching you with a gaze so heavy it felt like an unseen weight pressing against you. "i admit nothing," he corrected, voice as smooth as ever. "but even the most brilliant minds are prone to… lapses in judgment."

you let out a small scoff, shaking your head. "right. 'lapses in judgment.' is that what we're calling your absurd jealousy now?"

he exhaled through his nose, as if considering your words, before finally opening the meal you had brought him. "call it whatever you like, my dear," he said idly, plucking a piece of food with deliberate ease. "but tell me, if i were to flirt so freely with another, would you be so composed?"

your mouth opened, but the words died on your tongue. anaxa watched your hesitation with something akin to satisfaction, his smirk deepening ever so slightly.

"i thought as much," he said smoothly, taking a slow, deliberate bite of his food. "jealousy, my dear, is a universal affliction. i am simply more… expressive about mine."

you huffed, looking away, but the warmth in your cheeks betrayed you. "you're insufferable and lucky i have the patience for you," you muttered.

he let out a soft chuckle, low and indulgent. "patience," he mused, reaching out to brush a gloved finger against your cheek, slow and deliberate. "such a rare and commendable virtue. though i must wonder..."

his touch trailed lower, tracing the curve of your jaw before finally resting under your chin. with the lightest pressure, he tilted your face ever so slightly upward, forcing you to hold his gaze.

"how much longer will that patience last, i wonder?"

you swallowed, refusing to look away. "depends," you said, barely above a breath. "how many more times do you plan on pulling a gun on me?"

anaxa’s lips curled into the faintest smirk, but his eyes flickered with something softer—something dangerously close to fondness.

"ah," he sighed dramatically, finally releasing you and leaning back into his chair. "a fair question. but, my dear, you wound me. surely you know by now that i only threaten the things i cannot bear to lose?"

you stared at him, feeling both shocked and flustered.

you huffed, shaking your head as you finally relented, letting the conversation settle into something resembling peace. and despite everything—despite his absurd possessiveness, his impossible nature, his maddeningly smug demeanor—you couldn’t bring yourself to pull away.

because somehow, against all logic, against every ounce of reason—anaxa was yours. and that was something even he, with all his sharp words and sharper wit, could never deny.

☆゜・。。・゜゜・。。・゜★

mydei

mydei always found himself in petty competitions with phainon. whether it was who could pick the most apples to who could slay the most enemies, phainon always knew how to push his buttons.

though he might’ve pushed them a little too far..

“afraid you’ll lose? i would’ve never guessed that the great mydeimos was scared of talking to a girl. or are you scared [name] will end up liking me more?”

“deliverer,” mydei said with a scary amount of joy in his voice, “tell me, do you enjoy being humiliated by a kremnoan heir?”

“so is it a deal?”

“if that’s what you wish to call it, we’ll start now. try not to make an utter fool out of yourself. you won't even be able to touch them."

there was absolutely no way mydei was going to even let phainon breathe the same air as you.

phainon grinned, entirely unfazed by mydei’s sharp tone. “oh? possessive already? my, my, what will [name] think of this? surely they've noticed your crush on them by now.”

mydei exhaled through his nose, crossing his arms. “they will think nothing of it because you will not get the opportunity to so much as look at them.”

phainon laughed, tilting his head with an almost lazy confidence. “bold words. i wonder if you’ll still be saying that once they’re hanging off my arm instead.”

the barely restrained fury in mydei’s eyes was almost comical. “you delude yourself.”

“and you’re stalling.” phainon shrugged, already turning on his heel. “come now, mydeimos. unless, of course, you are afraid?”

mydei scoffed, stepping forward with an air of unwavering confidence. “i fear nothing—least of all a fool with an overinflated ego.”

the competition had begun.

mydei was the first to find you. he's always remembered the places you often frequented, the bathhouse being common among them.

mydei found you tucked away in one of the quieter corners of the bathhouse, steam curling through the air in delicate wisps. he approached silently, his footsteps barely making a sound against the stone floor.

he had always been observant—perhaps more than you'd realized. no matter how much time passed, he never forgot the places you sought comfort in.

"i thought i'd find you here," he murmured, his voice low and steady, cutting through the gentle trickle of water. "it's peaceful here," you said softly, returning your gaze to the water, watching a rubber duck float by.

after a long moment, you glanced at him, the tension in your chest easing just a little.

"you always find me."

mydei's crimson eyes softened, a rare hint of fondness breaking through his composed exterior.

"of course," he said quietly. "you're worth finding."

mydei had a huge advantage over phainon; everything that came out of his mouth was genuine.

you felt your body heat amplifying from his intense gaze, the steam from the bath worsening your situation.

the air between you two felt thick with unspoken words, the steam in the room only adding to the intensity. mydei’s crimson eyes were locked onto you with an unwavering focus, as if trying to read something deeper than just your expressions.

“you know, you really don’t make this easy,” you muttered, trying to divert your thoughts, the heat rising in your chest feeling like it might burst through your skin.

he raised an eyebrow, his gaze never leaving yours. "make what easy?"

you shifted uncomfortably, the faintest of blush creeping onto your cheeks. “this... this tension.”

mydei tilted his head slightly, the smallest of smirks tugging at the corner of his mouth. “tension?” he repeated, his voice smooth and calculated. “i’m simply speaking the truth.”

you shot him a glance, his words echoing in your mind. you’re worth finding.

it wasn’t like you hadn’t heard him say such things before, but this time, it felt different. There was no teasing, no veiled sarcasm—just the raw sincerity that mydei rarely offered.

“you never do anything half-heartedly, do you?” you said, a small sigh escaping your lips.

mydei didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he stepped closer, his presence looming like a silent promise. His gaze softened as he spoke, but there was still a quiet intensity behind it.

"only when it’s worth it," he said, his voice almost a whisper, but it still hit you like a wave.

your heart skipped a beat, and for a moment, you forgot how to breathe.

he moment hung between you two, the weight of his words settling deep within you. mydei’s presence was suffocating in the best way—an intensity that seemed to radiate from him, the kind that made it impossible to think of anything else but him.

you opened your mouth, but the words stuck. something about his steady gaze and the closeness between you left you speechless, your heart thudding in your chest.

“mydei…” you whispered, almost as if testing the air, "would you like to join me in the bath? i'm sue it'll help relieve any sores you might have?"

mydei's gaze flickered to you, and for a brief moment, the quiet intensity in his eyes softened, replaced by a curious, almost amused glint. he took a step closer, the space between you two shrinking even more.

“you offer me company in the bath?” he asked, his voice holding a hint of surprise. “how… bold.”

you could hear the teasing undertone in his words, but it wasn’t as biting as usual. there was something more… tender in the way he spoke, something that made your heart flutter despite the calmness of the moment.

“i only thought it might help you relax,” you replied, keeping your tone light, though your pulse quickened slightly under his steady gaze. “and you’re always so tense. even the crown prince needs to rest now and then.”

mydei let out a quiet chuckle at that, the sound warm and soft, like the fleeting warmth of the bath. "i’m afraid i’ve never had much time for relaxation," he murmured, his tone shifting again, darker, but with an edge of something more vulnerable. "but perhaps you’re right. it’s been... a long time since i allowed myself the luxury."

there was a pause, and you could see the weight of his words settle over him, like he’d just made a decision. his eyes softened, and he took another step closer, his fingers brushing against your wrist as he gently took your hand.

"then, i’ll join you. for once, perhaps i could allow myself this."

as mydei settled comfortably next to you in the bath, he couldn't help but wonder where phainon had been all this time.

and there was a small voice in the back of his head, saying 'if phainon found you first, would you have invited him into the bath with you?'

he glanced sideways at you, his gaze unreadable for a brief moment as he tried to suppress the discomfort he felt at the idea.

as he took in your relaxed face, mydei realized how important such moments were to the two of you. this was just the start of many more scenarios he would spend with you.

if you enjoyed please consider following/liking/reblogging :)

i just love the idea of unhinged anaxa

[ode2rin]

new boyfriend rin would never ever, under any circumstance, admit that he likes the pet names you call him. well… unless you would stop doing it. (also me pushing the bffs to lovers pipeline)

You must be upset with him, Rin is convinced so. It’s the only logical and sensible explanation behind this unusual behavior. 

And he's going mad about it. Itoshi Rin is going mad any second now if he can't get to the bottom of this, he’s certainly convinced.

Every instinct screamed that your recent behavior was a reaction to something he'd done, but what? Was it the late replies to your text messages? No, you knew he was at practice and you told him you didn’t mind. Was it about the souvenir he brought back home to you from Paris? Sure, you teased him about its impracticality, but nothing that warranted this icy distance.

Or maybe it was something he said now? It must be, right? Everything boils down to his reckless poor choice of words, he supposes.

Slowly, Rin approached you by the couch you’re seated in. With your attention preoccupied by the selection of shows you’re browsing, you settled on looking at him briefly through your peripheral vision. Amused by how he’s slightly tiptoeing around, you let out a half-suppressed laugh to yourself. 

He looks like a cat sometimes, you thought from the sight. And acts like one too. Like a big black cat who would hiss at you if you looked at him funny, or one that would bite your hand if you stopped petting him to sleep. Funny how Rin could be like that too.

The moment Rin settles into the plush comfort of the couch, he gazes at you through lowered lashes, trying to read the play of emotions on your face, if there’s any. 

There’s nothing worth noting, and he doesn’t know if that should assure or bother him.

“Are we… alright?” he drawled.

What the fuck. He did not just sound like that. 

He did not just ask that and sounded like an anxious pathetic wet cat who just had a new home waiting for its owner’s permission over anything (highly specific because he’s a bit dramatic). Just what kind of loser have you reduced him into, really.

Oblivious of the internal turmoil in Rin’s mind, you turn to him, “Hmm? Yeah? Why’d you ask?”

“Nothing,” he grumbled. It’s enough that he already humiliated himself for the way he asked if the two of you were cool— doing it again by exposing himself that he thinks you’re mad plainly because he hadn’t heard you call him a pet name (like you always do) would be mortification in its final form.

“Okay, Rin.”

That’s it. This needs to end. Forget humiliation. He would rather choose to feel pathetic over any day than continue with this charade.

“Are you mad at me?” 

“Why would you think that?” you asked back instantly, shocked and extremely confused because of your boyfriend’s question. You’re literally just looking for a movie the two of you can watch— how is that any indication of being mad at him?

“Just answer the question,” he fumed, impatience settling on the furrow of his brows.

You said in the beginning of your relationship that you didn’t appreciate the silent treatment and guessing games, so don’t you think it’s hypocritical of you to do the same to him? (You’re not, but he just doesn’t know that.)

“I’m not mad at you, Rin.”

“You so are!” 

“I am not! But you, yelling and instigating it are making me right now!” you countered, voice hinted with irritation, “What is your problem, Rin?”

There it is again. Rin rose from the couch to face your sitting form, as if standing would better prove his point. “See? You’re calling me Rin!” he blurted.

“Well, maybe because it’s your name?!”

“Not to you, it’s not!”

A beat of surprised silence. Until your lips grew to such a wide smile that made Rin physically feel his heart melting. 

Yet, in Rin’s true fashion, he’ll never let you know how much air you knock out of him because of your beaming smile. Instead, he’ll say something along the snarky lines of, “Stop smiling like that.”

“Did my big bad grumpy Rinnie here thought we’re on a fight because I hadn’t call him baby?” you ask, purposely stressing out the words to disarm him more.

With a feigned exasperation, he comments, “I forgot how annoying you are.” 

“And I forgot how childish you can get sometimes,” you countered.

“I’m not childish.”

“You don’t mind me calling you Rin then?”

Rin rolled his eyes at you, but you know better than to put meaning to it. He lowered himself onto the couch beside you. With a swift tug, Rin pulled you closer, closing the distance between you effortlessly. His arm found its way around your waist, drawing you snugly against his chest.

“But I don’t see why you need to…” Maybe he could be a bit childish.

“I thought you didn’t like it,” you shyly muttered, drawing shapes in his arm. “The pet names, I mean,” you clarified, sensing the confused look he’s probably giving you behind.

“What the hell are you talking about?” He is baby. He is Rinnie. Fucking hell, that’s so loser of him to even voice it out in his own mind. 

“What? You call me by my name!” you defensively pointed out.

“Doesn’t mean I don’t like your nicknames of me,” he mumbled, the words barely audible.

The pet names— they were more than what they served. It was important to him more than what he would admit. 

They were a secret language, a way you marked him as yours. A reminder that he wasn't just Rin anymore— just your friend.

He was now something more, something special.

A ghost of a smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “Besides… I love your name,” he whispered, his voice velvet against your hair.

It’s tender— no, it makes him tender. Saying your name has been the softest, kindest, and most tender way he’s used his words for. 

Maybe it’s a little pathetic, feeling this undone by a name. But then it’s you. 

It was your name— a name he could whisper with adoration, a name that belonged only to him to claim. 

You melt to his words, leaning deeper into his chest. A contented sigh escaped your lips, the sound swallowed by the warmth of his embrace.

Looking up at him, your eyes held a softness he often found himself getting lost in, “I love your name too, but I also like calling you pet names. Is it okay?”

“Whatever you decide.” He’s yours, either way.

note. this is basically rin being "my nameeee is whatever you decideeeee and i'm just gonna call you mineeee i'm insane but i'm your baby!!!!" yeah that song basically.

[bluepurplepinklock]

"You know I care..."

Itoshi Rin x reader, where you distance yourself from him thinking he has no interest in you, only for him to come running to you.

Rin didn't care. It pained you to accept that, but he really didn't care.

You were always there with him- talking, laughing, teasing and enjoying every moment. But when you realised how he never initiated any of it, you questioned yourself.

Do you annoy him? Is he really not interested? If you somehow disappear, would he even notice?

Given his resting bitch face, irritated eye rolls and annoyed sighs, the answer was clear. And so, you decided with a heavy heart that in order to preserve the little self respect you had left, you will do what is most logical- start distancing yourself from him.

As much as it hurt to not be around him, it was the best course of action to prevent your heart from loving him more only to be told he could never love you back.

You thought Rin wouldn't even notice your absence. The way you no longer attended his matches, or wait for him after class, or walked home with him, or sent him memes in the middle of the night, or steal every second to just be with him a little longer.

You thought he wouldn't bother, you were almost convinced he didn't- until he grabbed your wrist, yanking you away from your group of friends in the corridor.

"What's wrong?" he inquired, pulling you towards the lockers. His eyes bore deep into yours, like he might find the answer swirling behind your startled eyes if he stared intently.

"What?" you blink, taken aback.

"Don't act dumb," he spat, restlessly tapping his finger against his crossed arms, "why are you ignoring me?"

"I'm not," you shrug, trying your best to be nonchalant.

"Don't fuck with me, y/n" he breathed, his sharp gaze pinning you to your spot.

After picking through your words, trying your best not to show your own desperation to just give up on distancing and latch onto him again, you speak, "Stop acting like you care."

Rin's eyes widened, pure unfiltered confusion plastering his face. He blinked a couple times before clutching his head, "Gosh, what's wrong with you."

"Nothing," you shrug, sounding as confident as ever, "you know you never cared, so let me be. Besides, you must be delighted I stopped clinging onto you, annoying you to no ends."

You pivot on your heels, walking away until Rin's strong grasp holds you back and before you know it, he has you pinned against the locker.

His palms plant on either side of your head, into the locker behind. Rin's cold eyes stare right into yours, a blend of hurt and silent rage boiling in their depths, as his lips hover inches away from yours.

"Stop," his voice cracked and you felt his hot breath on your lips, "stop putting words in my mouth. I might have never said it out loud, but you know I care."

You gulp as heat rises to your cheeks when you feel his knee between your legs. He inches closer every second, caging you in yet still giving you enough time to break out if you want.

But you don't. You shove your plans of distancing yourself away because right now, all you want is to be impossibly close to this man.

Rin's lips press against yours, hot and impatient, and you totally give in to the desire in your heart. You drape your arms around his neck, pulling him closer as he envelopes you in his arms.

When you break apart, you are shocked to find his eyes damp with the slightest hint of tears.

Rin knew his cold exterior costs him too much. But the moment he felt it would cost him losing you, he couldn't help but smack himself in the head and reach out to you. You knew it. All of it. Just by looking into his wet eyes, the fear of losing you still lingering in them, you knew.

"Don't ever think of leaving me again," he whispered against your lips before capturing them into a kiss once again.

©bluepurplepinklock (Do not copy, steal or translate my work)

[seumyo]

pregnancy cravings with miya atsumu.

Pregnancy cravings never really made sense to Atsumu. Then again, he never got to the part of anatomy and physiology when he was studying physical therapy before he decided to go pro as a volleyball player.

But that doesn’t mean he isn’t supportive; no, he prided himself on being a great husband. And now, with you, his wife, pregnant with your first child, he was determined to be the most supportive, loving, and accommodating partner ever.

Nothing was going to stand in his way—not distance, not logic, and certainly not impossible cravings.

It started simple. Like it always did.

You wanted a specific pastry from a bakery on the other side of Japan? Done. He booked the fastest delivery service he could find, and when that wasn’t an option, he flew there himself, picked it up, and brought it back.

Talk about rich.

Homemade food? Good thing Osamu had drilled the basics of cooking into him, though he still got yelled at by his twin when he accidentally burned rice. But hey, effort counted, right?

Then, the cravings started getting weird.

You’re sitting on the couch with a blanket over your lap when you look up at him with serious eyes. “I want Osamu’s cooking.”

Atsumu blinked. “Alright, I can ask him—”

“But I don’t want to eat it. You eat it.”

He frowned, confused.

“Huh? Ya want me to eat ‘Samu’s cookin’?”

You nodded. “Yeah.”

Atsumu scratched his head, wondering if this was some kind of test. “And that’s gonna make ya feel better?”

“Yes.”

“… Even if ya don’ eat it?”

“Uh-huh.”

Atsumu blinked. “That doesn’t make no sense.”

“Atsumu, please don’t question me.”

“Yes, Ma’am!” He grabbed his phone and immediately dialed Osamu. “Oi, ‘Samu, I need ya to cook somethin’—no, not for [Name]—for me.” There was silence on the other end before Osamu sighed heavily and reluctantly agreed.

That night, Atsumu sat at the dining table, stuffing his face with his brother’s food while you sat across from him, smiling in satisfaction as you watched. Osamu just did his part as a supportive brother for his twin.

The next day was even worse.

“A seedless mango,” you murmured, rubbing your belly.

...

“A what?”

“A seedless mango. I want it.”

“… [Name], sweetheart, baby, I love ya, but that don’t exist.”

“It does.”

“It doesn’t.”

“I want it.”

Atsumu groaned. “Where am I gonna get a seedless mango?”

“Figure it out, please?”

He spent hours searching online, calling fruit vendors, and even asking Osamu if his suppliers had some secret black market seedless mango (Osamu asked him if a volleyball that was going 120 km/h hit his head).

No luck.

In the end, Atsumu cut up a normal mango, carefully removed every trace of the seed, and handed it to you with a hopeful grin.

You took one look at it and frowned.

“It’s not the same.”

Atsumu wanted to cry.

-

“I need you to wear a face mask.”

Atsumu blinked at you from your bed. “Huh? Why?”

You huffed quietly, fidgeting with the sheets. “Because your face is annoying.”

Atsumu gasped, hand clutching his chest. “My face?! The one ya love so much?!”

“Yes.”

“The one ya vowed to look at forever in sickness and in health?!”

“Yes.”

“The one ya called ‘beautiful’ when I asked ya if I was hotter than ‘Samu?!”

“I love you, but right now, your face is irritating me.”

Atsumu stared, utterly betrayed, before sighing in defeat. He got up, went to the closet, grabbed one of the disposable masks he’d bought during flu season, and put it on.

“There. Happy now?”

You smiled sweetly. “Very.”

Atsumu flopped onto the bed with a groan, pulling the blanket over himself. As he lay there, sulking, you scooted closer and rested your head on his chest.

“I love you, you know that?” you murmured.

He grumbled. “Ya sure? Feels like ya hate me sometimes.”

You chuckled. “No, I love you. My hormones just don’t.”

He sighed. “Yer so lucky I love ya more than life.”

“I know. Pregnancy is so weird.”

And the worst has yet to come.

-

Atsumu should be asleep by now, but no, he had to be individually popping popcorn. One kernel at a time, as per your request.

He initially told you, “Yer kiddin’.”

You were not.

And that was how Atsumu found himself in the kitchen at three in the morning, painstakingly popping one kernel at a time in a tiny pan. Every time he accidentally popped more than one, you, who were sitting on a stool with your hands on your belly, would click your tongue disapprovingly.

“You put in two, Atsumu.”

“This is torture,” he grumbled, but he kept going.

-

“I want ice cream,” you said.

Atsumu perked up. “Oh, easy. What flavor?”

“I don’t know.”

He tilted his head to the side. “Uh… okay. I can get a few different kinds?”

“I need to taste them all.”

Atsumu frowned. “Like… all the flavors?”

“Yes.”

“… Babe, there are like fifty flavors at the ice cream shop.”

You nodded. “And I need to taste all of them before I decide which one I want.”

Atsumu let out a long, suffering sigh, but being the devoted husband he was, he marched straight to the ice cream parlor and ordered a ridiculous amount of sample cups. The poor employee stared at him in disbelief.

“You… want every flavor?”

“Yeah.”

“Every single one?”

“Yeah.”

“Sir, that’s—”

“My wife is pregnant, and if I don’t do this, I might not make it to the end of the week.”

The employee, upon hearing this, immediately started getting to work.

When Atsumu got home, you took one spoonful of each, nodded, and, after going through every single cup, announced:

“I don’t want ice cream anymore.”

Atsumu fell to his knees. Defeated.

-

“I need you to stand in the corner for a while.”

Atsumu looked up from his phone, confused. “Huh?”

“The corner. Stand there.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. I just feel like you should.”

Atsumu squinted. “Babe, are ya makin’ me into a damn decoration?”

You nodded. “Yes.”

Atsumu sighed but did it anyway. He stood in the corner of your living room for a full ten minutes while you sat on the couch, happily watching TV. At some point, Osamu FaceTimed him, took one look at the scene, and hung up.

-

The next day, you called him while he was at practice, which was rare in itself because you did just leave messages whenever you knew he was practicing.

“Babe,” you said in a tone that made his stomach drop.

“… Yeah?”

“I need you to bring me a cheeseburger.”

He let out a relieved laugh, wiping the sweat off his brow. “That’s easy! I’ll grab ya one on my way ho—“

“But replace the buns with pancakes.”

Atsumu froze. “Come again?”

“You heard me.”

“I dunno if I did, sweetheart.”

“Pancakes. Instead of buns. Oh, and I want honey to go with it.”

Atsumu nearly dropped his phone.

“Yer messin’ with me.”

“I’m really not.”

And you weren’t. That evening, he stood in the kitchen, flipping pancakes with the precision of a professional chef before assembling the most unholy creation he’d ever laid eyes on—a cheeseburger with pancake buns, honey drizzled over the meat.

You took a bite and hummed softly. “Oh my god, this is better than sex.”

Atsumu, who had spent hours perfecting his technique in the bedroom, felt personally offended by that.

-

“Atsumu,” you murmur. “I need you to switch sides of the bed with me.”

He sighed. “No.”

“Atsumu.”

“[Name], baby, darlin’—I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because my side is closer to the door in case of an intruder.”

You chuckled quietly. “Tsumu, please. I need to sleep on that side.”

Atsumu stared at you, conflicted. He had never—not once—slept on the other side. It was unnatural. Wrong. It went against the very foundations of your marriage.

But you were looking at him with those tired, hormonal, pleading eyes. And he was sure you’d tell him you could barely see your feet now and often experience heartburn, all because of his unborn baby.

With a heavy sigh, Atsumu switched sides with you.

“You’re a good husband,” you whispered, patting his cheek.

Atsumu, lying in the unfamiliar position, staring at the wrong wall, whispered, “I’m a broken man.”

SEUMYO © 2025. PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, PLAGIARIZE, MODIFY OR TRANSLATE.

[amiaclone]

You asked I’ll write! Gender neutral reader if you don’t mind

Tw: cursing I guess? Squid game in general should be considered a trigger over all the murdering lmaoo

*In ho sighed for the what? Fifteenth time? He’s been counting it’s what he’s trying to focus on the other thing is well……*

*When he decided to participate in these games again it was to prove Gi hun a point and mess with him a bit so he joined his “team” which well….. they happened to be in*

You were apart of it a strong person filled with determination in debt to a lot of money…..honestly in ho was shocked with how much debt you were in I mean you seemed like someone who’d make it far in live would rule against the poor like he used to be…

But you weren’t you were *trash*

You were lower lower class you were nothing…..

Yet why couldn’t he stop thinking about you?

He had a wife who he fell out of love with before he even met you…..swore he’d never fall in love again after distancing himself with his family and starting the games…..

But you just had to be lucky star didn’t you?

You were “kind” and not in a pushover kind of way just….kind like kind that would not take shit from people but would help others in need….and didn’t hide your opinions from others that deserved it….

It was disgusting but…..In a good way? He wanted you not in a possessive way but in a way type of wanting to care for you and you care for him-

*He shook those thoughts off ugh. Why now? He’s usually so calm and collected…..at first he wouldn’t lie he was hoping you’d die in one of the earlier games but now….he isn’t so sure. Gi hun already has plans to take the guns and fight back he had a plan problem was…..you were apart of the main plan

He probably had to kill you it’s probably a good thing but…now he isn’t so sure he’s gotten along with you great and he has a tiny bit of hope that you even like him back so for you to find out he runs these games….he can’t risk it

You’ll find out anyway but he doesn’t wanna face you to your face he atleast wants to hide behind a mask atleast imagining what you’d say…..

Currently he’s trying to convince himself that these feelings aren’t real……maybe it’s just attraction? Of course you’re really good looking maybe it’s that!

“Uh In ho?”

*He turns around that voice dreaded him more then anything the voice he was ready to hear-*

“Are you okay In ho?”

It was Gi hun

*He unfortunately realised that after breaking out of his rare trance he blinked for a few seconds then nodded*

“What is it?”

*Gi hun shrugged* “Nothing you seemed out of it….” *In ho stared at the ground trying to seem calm but spoke in a bitter tone* “I’m fine…” *He let his eyes wander to you who was talking to he thinks Junhee the pregnant lady? Gi hun noticed and raised an eyebrow* “Maybe Y/n will cheer you up…..Hey y/n!”

*You raised an eyebrow nodding at Junhee before walking away up to the two men.*

“You guys need something?” *In ho sighed he’s been trying to avoid hearing your voice….and you in general.* “In ho seems nervous I thought you’d be better at calming him down…*

*As Gi hun left you leaned your back on the bars of the bed he was sitting on….he couldn’t even look at you.*

“So. What is it?” *You asked he didn’t look at you but he could tell you seemed concerned*

“……” “In ho?” “…….If somebody did something almost unforgivable in any way…..what would you do?” “……What?” *You were confused rightfully you knew he was like this but for the way he got was so….* “Just answer the question…..please.” “Well if we were close I’d….wanna know why. Depending on what they did it’s…..hard to say hey are you saying this cause you’re worried or something i understand i am too but…..don’t focus on the negative so much you know?” *As usual kind…..how could such a good human like you be in these games yet he knew…..He is the front man after all he decided to atleast “ask you” and bond maybe a bit before he has to let you go….*

“Yeah you’re right as logical as ever so why are……you in debt if you don’t mind answering?”

*He felt you rise up you stared squinting your eyes then smiling* “Damn didn’t expect anyone to ask me that….don’t think it’s important.”

*Oh he knows what it is why wouldn’t he a petty part of him felt betrayed some what you weren’t gonna tell him after how close you’ve gotten but he decided to keep his cool.*

“You don’t have to tell you i just asked since we might be leaving this place or if neither of us..make it.” *You groaned* “The pessimism again In ho? Jeez you could…..I’ll tell you though cause you do have a point.”

“Well i used to be pretty rich and well-“ *As you went into your story he already knew it but continued to listen you were rich worked in a high payed business workplace but like most work places favouritism is common. Which unfortunately lead to your downfall.* “Anyways one day I found out i was being underpayed a lot of money so I complained this and that and i got a warning complained again then got fired…..It was hard to find a job i didn’t pay the bills for a lot of things debt grew bigger and bigger then a man asked me to play a game one day and well…..here i am.” *Ah yes In ho nodded at your story he knew it all he was the person who called for you to be in the game….you were a wonderful person honestly what was he thinking you were too good for a game like this is something he of all people would never think he would say.* “Im sorry you don’t deserve to be here after all it’s not your fault you’re in debt…” *You shook your head* “Eh I didn’t have a good of a college degree anyway maybe if I studied more in college I wouldn’t be here but eh atleast i got to meet you?” *In ho sighed and he didn’t want to or realise it but he couldn’t help but let a small smile rise genuinely.* “I suppose it’s…..mutual.”

*You sighed smiling* “I can’t wait for tomorrow we’ll finally *maybe* get out of here right?” *He felt his heart stop for a second oh yeah…..that*

*He awkwardly cleared his throat* “Oh yeah I suppose this game will….end and we’ll probably never see each other again” *You snorted* “We can still talk, we can meet up together and talk and stuff it’s not like we need to forget each other…”

*”That’s right” In ho thought he needed to forget you maybe these feelings would go away….but the the thoughts came he didn’t want to but…..”I killed my brother damn it! I can do this I’ve talked to them for only a few days this is…”*

“In ho??” *He stared up at you instinctively like an animal almost he stopped himself and regained his composure.* “Jeez you seem tense maybe get some rest…” “No im…..just thinking….about all the bad decisions…..humans can make.” *You hmmd* “I suppose so humans can be evil if given the chance with such power.” *In ho nodded* “Have you ever thought of doing something regrettable?” *In ho wasn’t sure why he was asking these…..questions but maybe it was to see the inhuman side of them to make him disgusted in you? Maybe that’ll work.* “Well I’ll admit yeah…..I got bullied and when I found out there father had cancer i wanted to well bring it up tear them down….i think i was about 14.” *You didn’t seem shameful you seemed to regret it but not shamed it only made In ho admire you more as he hated it.* “So why didn’t you do anything?” *You laughed a bit* “I would of if it wasn’t for me asking my mom and telling her like i was about to do the best thing she got mad scolded me and told me a different way a better way to handle bullying……and I’ve used that advice since.”

*He quirked an eyebrow what would it be that he hasn’t heard ignore them stand up for yourself be the the bigger person?*

“Be better than them…..because bullies are the weakest of the weakest in society strategy they don’t want you knowing is you finding out you’re better then them.” *He knows that advice he’s never thought much of it but hearing it from you automatically makes him wanna know more…* “Well then your mom raised such a lovely person….you should be proud.” *You scoffed laughing a bit* “I made a lot of mistakes that i can’t even say thought of some weird stuff im glad i didn’t say or do anyways……yeah. We’re human everyone has made one bad mistake you’ll dwell on for the rest of your life my advice is well…..did you regret it?”

*In ho sighed smiling* “Thanks for the advice I’ll rest for a bit” *You got up smiling and leaving that’s it.* “Y/n you’ll always be in my memory….” *In ho didn’t know what to do with them maybe ask them to join him? No! That would be so idiotic they’d never agree….try to make them understand? Maybe let them go? Why doesn’t he want that…..he then smiled.* “I can’t wait for tomorrow y/n you’re so unpredictable maybe you could stay with me…..”

Anddddd a cliffhanger sorry if this is ooc i was halfasleep writing this 😭

[littlemisshyperfixation]

Yoongi Fic Recommendations

a - angst f - fluff s - smut

part 2

Series

In the Margins (a s f) by @bonvoyagenoona ⊹₊⋆ You weren’t sure what he would look like. His writing made you think of a cabin nestled among tall pines, a well-worn cardigan, a scotch neat, and a wistful wisp of smoke seeping into the air from the bowl of an unattended tobacco pipe. What stands before you now is a studio apartment in the city, cigarette butts, coffee stains, and a scowl. There’s definitely been a mistake.

Fix You (f a) by @casuallyimagining ⊹₊⋆ When you take in a stray cat, you have no idea he’s secretly a hybrid trying to escape his past. Can you help him heal?

desolate (a f s) by @angelicyoongie ⊹₊⋆ you just wanted a cute little normal cat to keep you company. so you're not really sure how you ended up with the grumpiest hybrid on earth that seems hellbent on making your life difficult.

One Shots

Set Me Free (a f) by @casuallyimagining ⊹₊⋆ Tired of being told how to live his life and unsure of where he stands in the world, Yoongi--your soulmate--yearns to be free. When you give him what he wants, it causes a rift in your relationship that seems irreparable. 12 years later, you find him back in your life. Can you mend your relationship? Do you even want to?

back-burner (a f s) by @yoonpobs ⊹₊⋆ sometimes you felt like you were the back-burner of a two-decade-long friendship. how could you ever compete?

Love Language (a s f) by @gukslut ⊹₊⋆ Your boyfriend obviously loves you, but his silence has you questioning if he *wants* you. If you could only get past your damn insecurities maybe you could appreciate what you have.

27 Phone Numbers (f) by @bxebxee ⊹₊⋆ Yoongi has gone through twenty-seven phone numbers over the last ten years, and you haven’t changed yours since high school. 

sweetner (f s) by @taegularities ⊹₊⋆ You used to know how he sounded when you were wrapped around him, but circumstances have pulled you apart and sent you scattering in opposite directions. Feelings shouldn't reappear so easily by simple words, but when you find yourselves in the same place once again, this is exactly what happens.

One Chance (f) by @out-of-jams ⊹₊⋆ A musical genius, a guy with a bad reputation, your assigned partner for your final project. And the last thing you ever would have expected.

Seasons Change (a s) by @taetaesbaebaepsae ⊹₊⋆ Min Yoongi and you, through the seasons, break up and come back together. Nobody said love was easy.

All That Holly, Jolly Sh*t (a f s) by @daechwitatamic ⊹₊⋆ You haven’t seen or heard from Yoongi since he broke your heart five years ago, laying out a logical list of reasons why you were better off breaking up. When a Christmas Eve blizzard traps you together for the night, you have no choice but to examine how few of those reasons are still true. And if they’re not… where does that leave you?

Now We Reign (a s f) by @oddinary4bts ⊹₊⋆ when working on a collab together makes you and Min Yoongi seek comfort with the other, you discover there’s more to life than loneliness. Only, hurdles mark your path in Min Yoongi’s life, and it’s unclear what the outcome will be. Will you be destroyed by him and his world, or will you learn to reign over it, together with him?

take five (a f) by @jiminrings ⊹₊⋆ you're min yoongi's nurse and you have a crush on him, and he gives you five chances to ask him out - he never said anything about accepting though.

The Final - Day 02 (s) by @yoongiofmine ⊹₊⋆ You've been Yoongi's go-to companion for the past few years, well aware that's all you were going to be. Despite your very real, growing feelings for the rapper, you took what you could get every time. Now, you're backstage at day two of the final leg of his tour when another member takes an interest in you. Will it be enough to make Yoongi realize he's got competition?

hello soulmate (f) by @bluemari23 ⊹₊⋆ your first day on the job doesn't turn out the exact way you envisioned

Sugar Rush Ride (s) by @lo1k-diamonds ⊹₊⋆ You produced a song based on your hidden desires for your fellow producer and promised yourself that tonight, things would change. You were done pining after him, but then he arrived at the listening party.

fuck being friends (a f s) by @strawberrynamjoon ⊹₊⋆ as if watching the guy you were hopelessly in love with hook up with another girl each weekend wasn’t enough, he also happened to be your best friend, making things extra complicated. and it only gets worse and worse once he finds you crying in the bathroom at a party one night.

Take One (s f) by @untaemedqueen ⊹₊⋆ There are three things which Yoongi was certain of. One, he was a big star in his field of work. Two, he had a huge cock, one to rival many of the largest names in his industry. Three, he can only find pleasure these days in written word. 

Illicit Favors (f s) by @yoongiofmine ⊹₊⋆ When your editor tells you to re-write the chapters of your book because the sex scenes are weak, suggesting you write them from experience, what do you do when you lack any kind of sexual experiences in general? You go to your friend and ask him for help with it.

Bet On It (s) by @minisugakoobies ⊹₊⋆ What's a little wager between enemies? How about if it's your body on the line?

subscribed (s f) by @aquagustd ⊹₊⋆ you find out that youtube isn’t the only site he uses to satisfy his subscribers. what do you do with that information?

[fizz-pop-thwip]

I struggle thinking about non consensual human experimentation as a whole, but what happened to Bucky really it does just make me sick.

To start, think of how his stomach dropped when he fell from the train, the fucking fear knowing you're dead. You have 2 seconds and then your dead, this is it.

Then you wake up to 1) being alive, horrifically unaware of the 70 years of hell ahead of you and 2) your arm being not only surgically removed but replaced with a metal arm, a foreign body, a parasite. You fight because what else are you ment to do? But you fall unconscious again.

You wake up to days and days of torment and torture and slowly loose hope that it will ever end, that you'll ever be saved. He didn't know that Steve was dead, how long did he yearn for Steve to find him? How mad did he get? Did he punch the wall, did he scream? Did they have to sedate him because of just how psychotic that made him? How fucking manic he would go?

How long till he lost all feeling, all emotion and hope?

When they started putting him in the chair, did he scream and cry? Did he beg for anything else? Any thing, anything, fucking anything. Did he beg for death? Did he feel himself slowly lose all of his memory, did he sob when he first couldn't picture Steve's face, or when he could remember the most important person in the world, but not a name or a background or a face, not a crumb.

The first time he's put in cryo freeze, does he remember his reflection? Seconds before he fell unconscious, never knowing how long it would be before he woke up again. Did he wake up, begging to just be put back in, the closest fate to death he could ever achieve? The closest thing to mercy? Does he catch himself falling asleep at night and wake up in tears, not even sure if it's been 20 minutes of 20 years.

Did his crys for help fall on the shiney leather shoes of scientists who showed no emotion, did he question if he was even human to begin with? Surely a human would be treated with even a fraction of care. No one treated like this was born from a mother, no one treated like this was ever looked at with maternal love.

He stopped feeling like a person, he didn't even remember he was a person. When things seeped though it just hurt, they hurt him, it made it worse. So he stopped it, he wouldn't let himself. It was impossible to live. He had no coping mechanisms, no outlet, he would show any signs of struggle and be hurt for showing humanity. He had to be what they wanted.

Even after he was broken in, no crying anymore. No begging for mercy. Did he spend his nights awake, just TRYING to remember what he forgot, FEELING the missing spots in his mind? Did he hold that metal arm close because he can't even remember how he got it anymore, all he knows is it makes his shoulders ache.

He was completely and utterly trapped, the more he suppressed, even the minor shards he remembered, the more mania he would experience.

Even once he's free, how do you come back from that, even if it was just a mental thing, the physical, real DAMAGE to his brain was enough to make him never heal again. Bucky is a walking fucking miracle and maybe THE survivor.

He is going to have memory problems, severly. He is going to have intense PTSD flashbacks, total hallucination level, breakdowns. Seriously, this level of trauma is NEVER leaving him, not fully. Phantom pains, endless nightmares, coping mechanisms that don't make sense but comfort him none the less.

He's going to have periods of times where he can't even stand being touched, not Steve, not anyone. Weeks where he can't shower or move out of a space his brain has deemed safe for fear of being hurt. Scratches at the seam between his flesh and the metal of arm, wanting it off, wanting it away from him. Again does it necessarily make sense logically? NO!! but does he feel it 100%? Yes!!

He gets better, his bad periods get less intense, more far in between but they never fully go away. As fuckimg depressing as it is, hydra made a permanent mark on his psyche. It's FUCKED.

Gods strongest soldier is Bucky Barnes.

[killerpancakeburger]

Well-placed Trust

As soldiers unpromptedly walk in on a maskless Ghost and you, your solution to protect his face is to shove it in your chest.

Tags: f!reader (boobs involved), civilian!reader, protective!reader, fluff + smut, Praise, Ghost is a menace (positive), boobs worship, 1k words.

Gaining Simon Riley's trust was not something you ever planned to achieve. However, now that you've had it, you were fiercely protective of it.

This would explain why, when you heard the door to Ghost's room randomly opening, and your eyes flew to the skull mask laying on his desk— barely a meter away but it might as well have been on the other side of the ocean—, your first instinct was to launch yourself at him. Bluntly shoving his face into your chest without warning, in hopes to conceal it from the newly arrived trespassers, and wrapping your arms around his head in a desperate attempt to hide his hair as well.

Nevermind that he's trapped right between your breasts.

You throw a mildly accusatory stare at the entrance, and coarse laughs ring out, followed by a barely believable apology.

“Oops, sorry. Wrong door. Didn’t mean to interrupt!”

You let out a relieved sigh as the door closes. However said relief is quick to vanish as you realize Simon hasn’t reacted at all this whole time. Not a word, not even a grunt; not a move, not even to repel you. 

You let go of him like you've been burnt, even raising your hands in surrender.

“Sorry! Are you mad? I panicked, I was just trying to—”

Your waterfall of apologies brutally ceases when, after attempting to back away, you're stopped short by his embrace. You don’t know when he wrapped his arms around your waist. His expression still out of sight, anxiety nags at you, despite the logical part of your mind emphasizing that if he was actually angry, there's no way he'd demonstrate it by hugging you. 

So you insists.

“Ghost?”

“Mmh.”

The sound is raspy, unbothered. He idly rubs his face against your torso, and the motion is enough to make your crotch throbs with arousal. Inhaling sharply at the unexpected sensation, you clench your thighs together.

“Simon,” you call again, trying to sound severe this time.

You have absolutely zero reservation in granting all the hugs he might crave, but surely they could be performed in a less… compromising position. Lest you end this cuddle session squirming with want. And a burning face. And the imperative need to never cross the lieutenant ever again, for fear that you'd spontaneously combust with mortification otherwise.

“‘M not mad.“

The gruff, familiar voice appeases your tension a little— the emotional one, that is. Not the physical one.

“You're not? You have a right to b—”

“I trust you.”

Your heart skips a beat at the confession. You suspected it, hoped for it— but hearing it out loud is another matter entirely. Simon Riley is a man of few words, but the ones he does pronounce are always sincere, to the point of bluntness. For him to feel the need to spell it out loud, it has to be important.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. You've put my comfort over yours, no questions asked. Couldn’t be more pleased, love.”

The gravel in his voice does funny things to your stomach— why, why, why? It never had that effect before.

You try to ignore the signals sent by your body, instead passing a hand behind your neck in self-consciousness. 

“Oh… well. It was nothing. I'd do it again in a heartbeat—”

“You've been so good to me, sweetheart. Don't ya think you deserve a reward?”

Your brain short-circuits. Your skin gets even warmer. Surely you misheard him.

He finally unsticks his face from your chest, resting his chin above your sternum, only to stare with the start of some impatience drowned out in warmth and fondness.

He's a vision, one that takes your breath away and causes heat to pool in your stomach.

Heavy-lidded eyes, disheveled hair, ardent stare, he's a languid, lascivious mess.

“I need an answer. Preferably in one word. Yes, no, fuck off…”

In other, normal circumstances, you would have stayed mute from the shock, or helplessly stuttered, but the imperative desire to not disappoint him, to preserve the contentment he displays, takes over.

“Fuck. Yes.”

The low chuckle that escapes him in reaction to the eagerness of your reply makes you bite back a moan. Your hands close into fists on the back of his shirt.

He lifts your shirt— "hold this for me, love"— and effortlessly frees your chest from your bra. The second your skin is bare, he presses his face back into it, nuzzling against it with a blissful sigh.

With one hand busy grasping your top, and the other clinging onto his shoulder for balance, there's nothing you can do but submit yourself to his ministrations.

It's your turn to sigh in pleasure as he proceeds to kiss an invisible line between the bottom and the top of your breast, fingers stroking the curve between your ribs and your nipple.

“Never dreamed you'd let me get my face on those, love.”

Groggy, it takes a conscious effort on your part to register what he's saying.

“Such a generous thing. It's only right you get payback.”

“You're very… talkative all of a sudden.”

“S'that a problem? Think I'm not putting my tongue to use enough?”

Right after that, said tongue swirl around your nipple and you can feel yourself clench around nothing.

“Or maybe that's just not your thing,” he adds, casually, as if he hadn’t been shamelessly gropping, kissing, licking and sucking your chest.

“I never said that.”

Your reply had been straight off, out of fear that he'd take offense and puts a stop to all this.

“You know what to do to shut me up, anyway.”

You don’t react to his provocative tone, but you’re tempted by the invitation nonetheless— to muffle that smart mouth with your bust…

Just as his focus on your breasts threatens to not suffice you anymore, his thumb insistantly rubbs the apex of your thighs, and you push back against it openly.

“Easy there, sweetheart,” he soothes you, but you can see how pleased he is by your eagerness. “M just gettin’ started.”

Soon enough he disposed of your pants, and he's parting your knees to nuzzle against your inner thigh the way he was against your chest mere moments ago. You can’t help but close them partially, and instantly he's staring you down, eyes brimming with taunt.

“Gonna smother me with your thighs, sweetheart? Like you did with your tits, mh? Better be prepared in case we get ‘interrupted’ again.”

“Fucking hell, Ghost,” you groan, half exasperated, half even more aroused, as he finally steers his head towards your crotch.

[shy-writer-999]

OP Headcanons: Sanji & begging

WARNING: MINORS DNI, NSFW CONTENT.

A/N: Sanji hates it when you beg, but cockwarming changes his mind. ~3.8k words.

CW: Afab reader w/gendered language ("pretty girl" used in dirty talk once), teasing, begging, crying (only a tiny bit), edging, cockwarming, overstimulation, P in V.

Sanji & begging/c0ckwarming

Sanji wanted you to know you that you have all of him, so he absolutely detests it when you beg. Even the smallest hint of desperate pleading in your voice makes his eye twitch—you can have anything you want, and you have all of him. Why do you even question it? Why would he ever make you beg for it? You could have the whole world, his whole self, his heart, anything he could get his hands on, he would give it to you. He would do anything for you, no questions asked. Begging, in Sanji’s logic, at least, implied that he was withholding something from you—an idea he was categorically opposed to; you had all of him, and he would give anything to you that you wanted, or (literally) die trying.

While Sanji loved sex, fucking, making love, getting nasty, and getting lovey-dovey, he refused to tolerate begging of any kind. He wasn’t annoyed by you asking for something, but to him, there was a difference between asking and begging. Safe to say, whatever he understood as ‘begging’ was a pet peeve for him (albeit a very mild one).

However, Sanji’s aversion to begging changed the night you decided to try out cockwarming. You asked if you two could try it out. Sanji said that he was more than happy to oblige—as mentioned previously, he’d do anything you asked, and being able to do things for you brought him the purest happiness. Plus, he knew it would feel great.

Before it happened, you told Sanji that you wanted him inside of you for at least twenty minutes before you started fucking. You were setting the rules and establishing expectations, something that he was fantastic with.

“Sanji, no matter what I say, don’t start fucking me, and don’t let me start fucking you, until we reach the 20-minute mark. I wanna try it. Ok?”

Sanji promised that no matter what, you wouldn’t start fucking until the 20-minute mark, on the dot. He thought it sounded easy and he was eager to try out anything that would please you.

You cautioned him. “Even if I start begging, don’t listen to me, ok?” He assented—you knew how he felt about this sort of thing, so you figured he wouldn’t have a problem with it. He would do as you asked, naturally.

You knew that waiting twenty whole minutes would be difficult… but it sounded fun. And his cock felt amazing inside of you, so why not? If you saw Sanji get worked up, that would be an added bonus.

When the time came, you were sitting on Sanji’s lap, your back resting on his chest. His hands were on your hips. He set a timer on his phone and wasted no time pushing his cock through your folds and into your core. When he first started stretching you out, you realized this would be much harder than anticipated. You’d never get over how it felt when he was buried deep inside.

As Sanji pressed his head further and further into you, you shuddered. He length felt massive and hot. Gliding himself inside of you as deep as he could, he bottomed out and came to a stop. Your breath hitched. He could feel your walls already constricting, could tell that your body had tensed, that you were holding your breath.

“Baby, just relax.” He cooed in your ear as his hands slid down your hips to rest where your hips and thighs met. He gave you a good squeeze. “Only twenty minutes, ok? Just think of how good it will be when we can start moving.”

Sanji was in control, which he liked. He was submissive frequently, and sure, he liked being told what to do, but in the event that he had the reigns, he got such a kick out of telling you what to do—as long as you didn’t start begging and crying for it. Because, once again, you could have anything you asked for, and you had all of him. Sanji was hopelessly in love with you, he worshipped you. Your wish was his command. And now that you wished for cockwarming, he was in command.

He felt a little playful and figured it’d be nice to get you worked up, but not too worked up. After all, that was part of the fun. Some dirty talk and encouragement couldn’t hurt.

“Mmmm,” he hummed into your neck from behind and gave your hips a squeeze. “Your pussy feels great on my cock. So warm and wet already. Does it feel good for you too, pretty girl?”

You nodded.

“Can you use your words, my love?”

“Yes, Sanji, it feels good.” Your voice was strained and heat was blooming between your legs concerningly quick.

“It’s going to feel even better when I can drag it inside and outside, isn’t it?” He murmured again, close to your ear. You could feel his hot breath on your neck.

You answered “yes”, getting wetter—when he talked to you like this, it did something to you. It made your butterflies stir and made you bashful, no matter how many times it happened.

He continued. “Mmmhmm, ‘s gonna feel so good.” Sanji’s dick jumped inside of you while he whispered sweet things in your ear, and your pussy clenched around it in response.

While you cockwarmed him, Sanji had a cookbook propped up on the table in front of you. He figured he might as well be productive in the twenty minutes, and it would be a good distraction. As long as you sat still, there’d be no problem. And besides, he had strict orders to stick to.

“Can you turn the page, my dear?” His voice went from teasing and seductive to gentle and loving. He was unfazed by the whole thing so far, but your previous resolve had started to disintegrate.

The cookbook was interesting, you smelled and felt good, and Sanji was happy. Regardless of whether or not his cock was in you, it was a privilege to be close to you in any way, so he was quite enjoying himself.

When reached your hand forward to turn the page of the cookbook, per his request, the small movement shifted his cock inside of you just barely. It was hardly noticeable, but the tiniest amount of friction sent electricity to your core.

Sanji kept reading. Three minutes went by.

He told you when to turn the page, and every time you reached forward (truly, the most miniscule of movements), your cunt clenched around his length. You were trying so hard to ignore it, but you just felt so full. Your juices were already starting to drip down his shaft, oozing to the base of his cock. Sanji could feel every delicious drip—he indulged in a fantasy for a second, imagining the taste of you, wishing he could suck on your clit. And while Sanji imagined sticking his tongue into your slit and rubbing your clit at the same time, you were trying to steady yourself. You told yourself to get a grip—after all, it was only 20 minutes, what’s the big deal?

As you reached to turn the next page (he was reading so fast, or rather, he was pretending to read fast), your core started to pulse around him. You took a deep breath, trying to regain composure. This whole thing was your idea, so you had better stick to the plan.

“Are you getting that excited already?” He scolded, feeling you squeeze and clench around him. “You have to wait. It’s only been seven minutes, princess.”

“I know, Sanji. It just feels so good already, it’s going to drive me crazy.”

“Crazy or not, you have to wait, sweetie.” His voice was coddling and sympathetic but stern.

His breath tickled your ear and he kissed from the back of your ear to your neck. It added to the overwhelming sensation of his cock throbbing in you, not moving, almost pressing on your g-spot but not completely.  

It felt like time was standing still—the seconds felt like hours, but only two more minutes had passed. Your heartbeat quickened and your gooey walls squeezed him again, molding to the shape of his cock, memorizing every inch of it, preparing to crave it again as soon as possible.

“I can feel that,” Sanji murmured as he felt you constrict and quiver for him. “Feels good.”

You didn’t respond because you knew your voice would come out as a whine. He squeezed your thighs again.

Pressure and heat were boiling in your core at this point. Only nine minutes in and your body was entering dangerous territory—you couldn’t focus on anything other than Sanji and his cock. You indulged for a moment, envisioning how good it would feel when he finally moved, how good it would feel for him to bring his hands up and play with your nipples, sucking on your neck and calling you sweet names.

The next time Sanji asked you to flip the page of his cookbook, you had to stifle a moan. You readjusted your position slightly; you were starting to feel uncomfortable. When you tried to reposition your thighs, which had been aching because your muscles had been tensed the whole time, his cock brushed your soft spot and you let out a muffled, needy sound. It sounded like a whimper, almost inaudible, but since he was so close to you, he heard it clear as day.

“Does it really feel that good when you turn the pages for me?” Sanji’s tone was one of feigned scorn, but you could hear his grin while he spoke. “Ten more minutes, angel. We’re halfway there. Just hold on. Don’t even think about how deep my cock is in you. Try to forget it. We’re just sitting here.”

While he tried and failed to calm you, Sanji was holding on for dear life. He was keeping a good façade, though. Every time that your pussy squeezed, every time he felt your muscles spasm, it sent a ripple of pleasure through him. If you could have seen it, you would see that his cock was weeping precum inside you. Every flutter from your core milked it out even more.

Only a minute had passed—nine minutes left on the timer. You were in agony at this point. Couldn’t he just move his cock a little bit?

You were starting to lose control of your body—you needed him now. Your cunt wouldn’t listen to reason, and desire was starting to fog your mind, pushing you into a haze where the only thing you could think of was how good Sanji felt inside of you and how badly you wanted to ride him.

Another minute went by. You couldn’t hold it any longer. You felt like you were going to explode.

“Sanji,” you let out a whine and his cock jumped again. “I can’t do it anymore.” As he took a breath to utter out a reply, you adjusted your hips and started to grind back and forth on his length. Since it was buried inside of you, every movement felt intense and satisfying, mind-blowing. Your movements brushed and squeezed his whole shaft—if you did this much longer Sanji wouldn’t be able to take it. But he had to. He promised you.

Your body went into overdrive. You couldn’t focus on anything and your resolve to wait nine more minutes completely vanished. You needed him and you were going to have him. You knew he wanted it because his cock twitched every other second. When you started grinding on him you moaned his name and it went straight to his dick.

“Y/N!” His voice was harsh. “Stop it, we can’t do that yet. We only have a few minutes left. I want it too, but you told me that we had to make it 20 minutes, so just hold on, my love.” He gripped your hips painfully tight, holding you in place, making sure you weren’t able to move an inch.

You started to pant and your hands met his, grasping them so hard it hurt.

“S-Sanji,” you were fully whining, not holding back anymore, so frustrated. “I can’t, I—nnnghhhhh—fuck, I can’t wait, I- I need it. Can we do it earlier? I want it now. Just forget what I said about 20 minutes.” You choked back another moan, exasperated, and his grip tightened.

“Y/N, I said no.” He had to choke back a groan. “Only a few more minutes. I promised you. We can’t yet, no matter how sweetly you ask. You told me to get to 20 minutes.”

His words went in one ear and out the other. You were lost already. Reason was out the window. You desperately tried to move your hips from side to side, up and down, to no avail. His grip was iron tight, leaving bruises where his fingers were clamped unforgivingly on your skin.

Finally, you started to beg.

“Sanji, I need you. Need you to fuck me now. Please,” your voice took on the most pathetic tone he’d ever heard. Sanji could feel your heart pounding while you begged for it; he could feel how out of breath you were. “Please fuck me—I—I need it so bad. P-please, Sanji.”

It took Sanji a moment to register your words. Lust was starting to take over his mind. If he wasn’t at the precipice of losing control already, he would have told you to stop begging at him—he would have reminded you of your own words from not long ago.

But you were imploring, beseeching, pleading for him to fuck you. You were telling him to not listen to what you said previously and that you wanted him now—and the issue was that he wanted you now, too. He wanted you so bad that it hurt. Combined with your futile attempts to writhe out of his grip, your sniveling and whining flipped a switch in Sanji’s brain. You sounded depraved, starved, desperate and cock-crazed.

He was so turned on he thought he would pass out. So this is why begging was appealing. This feeling is why people liked it when their partners needed something so badly they started to beg. To have you lose all inhibitions and desperately crave him so bad… he was outrageously attracted to you and wildly in love with you. Seeing you want him so bad… he would never forget it.

Need is an understatement. You desired Sanji carnally so much that you backtracked on your own words, told him to pay them no heed. You told him you’d do anything for him to fuck you now. You couldn’t make it five more minutes. You didn’t care about what you said before—you had to have it now.

“Fuckkkk,” he groaned. “We shouldn’t yet—baby I told you, we’d—ngggghhhh—told you we’d make it to—to twenty minutes.” His face was contorted. He was exercising the most discipline he ever had, steeling himself.

“I don’t care about what I said earlier,” you keened, fingernails digging into his skin, thighs shaking. “Need it now. Sanji, please.” He couldn’t see your face, but he could tell that you were so frustrated tears had started welling in your eyes.

Sanji froze. He felt your pussy quaking and your body was physically screaming out in need. He heard your words; heard you give him permission to fuck you now. He saw your toes curling, felt your fingernails digging into his wrists… It was too much. He was at his wits end. He was about to give in to the situation, your words, and his own desperation.

“Fuckkkkk,” he groaned loud and long, the deep noise rumbling out of his chest. He threw his head back, brows furrowed, face twisted. He had been clenching every last muscle in his body in an attempt to not fuck you. Before, you had asked him sweetly to make it to 20 minutes, to not listen to a thing you said, even if you begged for it. But here you were now, dripping slick on his cock, begging and pleading him to disregard what you had said earlier… begging him for pleasure, for the pleasure he could and wanted to give you.

Sanji couldn’t take it anymore. “Do it.”

When you heard his words and his grip on your hips loosened slightly you immediately pulled off his cock just enough and plunged him back into you. You were so wet it had seeped down his balls, making a messy puddle on the chair beneath you; your slick made your movements fluid and felt slippery on his cock.

Bouncing on his cock after begging for it, after waiting for it so long, after being so good—it was the most pleasure you’d ever felt. He was filling you up, fucking you so sloppily. His hands helped you go up and down, his groans played in your ear like honey. “F-feels so good, baby. So—so good on my cock.”

Sanji saw stars, his mind went blank. He moaned your name again and again while you whimpered. He felt how warm your cunt was, how wet it was, how tight it was, how sweaty you were—he savored your pathetic noises, got off on how needy you sounded, how desperately your hips grinded into his cock, how you fucked yourself with it. Sanji was gone. He became feral, helping you ride him faster and faster until neither of you could breathe. He didn’t give a fuck anymore.

“S-sanji, I—I’m gonna cum,” you moaned.

“Don’t care,” he grunted out, pussy drunk and apathetic.

Your ass and cunt slammed down onto his cock so rapidly that noises filled the room within seconds. It smelled like sex already; the slapping noises were almost as filthy as the noises coming from your mouth.

You almost were at your limit, so when Sanji’s fingers trailed down and started messily rubbing your clit, you nearly blacked out from pleasure, practically screaming his name.

“Cum for me.” He murmured right in your ear, his voice husky and deep.

Only seconds after that, the wave of bliss crashed over you as you creamed on his cock. You felt like you were floating, detached from reality. All you could feel was Sanji inside of you; you were aware of nothing else. You convulsed and twisted on him, tightening and wringing his cock.

Your orgasm didn’t faze Sanji. He fucked you just as aggressively through your orgasm as before. He overstimulated you, listening to your cries and getting off on the desperate noises trickling out of your mouth.

“Sanji,” you squirmed. “’s too much.”

You didn’t tell him to stop, and he knew that you felt so good from his cock that you were going to let him do anything. He was hungry for it, almost growling in your ear, telling you to “Keep going, princess.”

Sanji was doing all the work now. As his cock rammed into you, hitting your g-spot so many times you lost count, he quickly brought you to the brink of orgasm again. He was wrenching pleasure from your core, dragging it out of you carelessly and roughly.

“Feels so good on my cock, my love,” he groaned again, his voice hoarse. “Bouncing on it so good, so wet—taking it all for me. Doing such a good job.”

Your eyes were rolling back into your head at this point, you were almost limp. You needed more and more, wanted him inside of you forever—you were fucked out, fucked into oblivion, fucked like you had never been fucked before.

“S-sanji, I’m—I’m gonna cum again.”

“Show me.” His voice was rough, raspy, and gravelly.

Another wave crashed down on you as you orgasmed again, writhing and crying out his name. You fully collapsed back into him. When you came on his cock again, Sanji was seconds after you. He couldn’t hold it anymore. His hips bucked up, jerking and twitching into your cunt as his cum finally shot deep inside you. He came so much that it started leaking out of your slit, coating his shaft and balls with his own cum. He came for what felt like forever; it felt like he moaned your name a hundred times.

When you both finished riding the waves of euphoria, you were exhausted and dripping with sweat. Your hair was matted to your forehead, your voice weak, legs shaking so much you doubted you’d be able to walk.

Sanji was so fucked out he could hardly think. Moments after you both started to return to reality, you realized that Sanji’s timer had been going off the whole time. It was loud and blaring—it’s a wonder neither of you heard it.

“Fuck,” he groaned again, grabbing his phone and cancelling the alarm while he was still inside of you. “So much for waiting twenty minutes.” You could hear in his voice that he was smiling. He kissed your neck and the back of your shoulders, wrapped his hands around you into a loving embrace. “You did such a good job waiting for so long, baby.”

His praise made your heart melt. Sanji would compliment you no matter what, give you anything you wanted, love you through it all. Your requests were never too much, and he listened to you always. He was the ultimate lover-boy.

“Okay, my love.” He nuzzled into the crook of neck and held you tighter. “Let’s go take a shower, we both need one.” He pulled out of you, doubling down on the kisses and squeezes to make up for it, then he scooped you up and carried you to the shower, where he proceeded to clean you up, kiss your forehead, and tell you how good you had been through the whole thing.

After the cockwarming, Sanji came around (pun intended) to the idea of begging. He liked that you were so desperate for him and he liked that he was in control so much that you started to babble and moan with every breath. Thinking about it later that night made his cock twinge again—he had inadvertently discovered a new part of you (the uncaring relentlessness of your entreaties) and a new part of himself (wherein he got off on seeing you so fucked out and desperate that you begged).

(˃ᆺ˂) (=^･ω･^=) (⊙_☉) (¬_¬)ﾉ

okay that's all thank u sm for reading and indulging in this freakiness with me i appreciate u so so much!!! if you got this far, which would you like to see first? i'm thinking of something with either ace or zoro...

here's my masterlist if ur interested!

--Z

[sailoryuns]

INAMORATA ─── PSH

genre. idol!sunghoon x model!f!reader | established relationship

warnings. angst, fluff (moreso towards the end), smut, accusations of cheating, hoon being lowkey toxic, cunnilingus, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, some mentions of crying, not proofread wc -> 1.5k

ps. the position i’m referring to is this (nsfw link), i usually hate vids but this was rly good imo.

“i think we should take a break...” you admit, voice growing shakier as you spoke. this was never something you wish to say in a million years, you wanted this relationship to work more than anything. but you were at your wits end with everything, talking to sunghoon was like conversing with the wall, never fully grasping any of your concerns.

you noticed the cracks beginning to seep in the midst of six months of being with him. he would often be dishonest of his whereabouts, saying he was out late due to “work” but was actually out drinking at some bar with jake or something. it made no sense for him to lie about such trivial things but he does it without even thinking. this was supposed to be a lovely vacation in paris together but lately you’ve grown tired of feeling like you’re unappreciated. a break from each other might be the best solution in getting his act together once and for all.

sunghoon felt his whole body turn limp as you uttered those words. not only was he blindsided by your decision, but you never indicated before to him that you were ready to propose such a drastic idea. “but why though? don’t you think this is a bit random? i mean this came out of nowhere y/n, i thought everything was good between us, why are you suddenly saying this now?” his thick, bushy brows furrowed in confusion, he wasn’t letting you off this easy and you know it.

“i just think it’s for the better right now hoon, we’re both so busy. we have a lot on our plate, especially you… and this relationship is just— it’s only putting more strain on everythi-”

“are you serious y/n? do you hear yourself? i knew what i was getting myself into the day i asked you to be my girlfriend. i’m well aware that i can’t be with you 24/7, and neither can you—however, i don’t expect that anyway. all i ever wanted was to have you by my side, i want to work through the hardships with you but if you’re so willing to give up like this then… i don’t know. i don’t even know what to say to this honestly..” sunghoon couldn’t help but cut you off, once his emotions take over, all sense of logic and reasoning is thrown out the window.

he was never one to question his worth in the eyes of his partner, but you were his longest relationship, he saw you as his first and only true love. it never occurred to him that he could lose you, the possibility of this break lasting long enough to make your love fade away was a scary revelation. there had to be a way he could fix this, he couldn’t bear to be without you.

“are you seeing someone else? maybe that’s why you’ve been so distant towards me lately…” he wanted to scream for saying that out loud but at least he got it off his chest. he knows how petty it sounds but he didn’t care, he wanted you to give him answers.

“no! i’m not seeing other people, i don’t have an interest in anyone but you sunghoon. i want to do this for the sake of us, we’re clearly not where we need to be and this break could help with getting us back on track and spending time apart could be beneficial.” you try your best to articulate your words properly but he remained unconvinced, he wasn’t on board with any bit of this.

how could you even be okay with something like this? spending time away from you drove him absolutely insane, he couldn’t fathom taking a break—not from someone as important as you in his life. he just needed to remind you that the love was still there, though it may be but a dull flame, he could ignite the spark again, with the little bit of hope he had left.

the foundation of your relationship was built from shared interests, since you both are part of professions that rely heavily on looks, you refused to see each other based solely off those superficial aspects. instead you got to know each other’s minds, your core values and beliefs, what mattered to you the most. you cherished every one of those deep conversations you shared together, it was a beautiful experience, an indescribable memory that shaped your bond forever.

so why is it now that you feel this way? was he really that oblivious to everything? he should’ve done more to prevent this but now he fears it’s too late. he’s faced with the conundrum of losing you and there wasn’t much time for him to stall or ask for a chance of redemption, he couldn’t waste another second.

“fuck that,” sunghoon angrily spat, his face contorting into a look of pure disgust. “you’re not going anywhere.” he reaches out to grab your waist before you could walk away, aggressively pulling you into his chest.

no matter how much you attempt to escape his hold, he’s not letting you go in the slightest. he’s much stronger than you, could easily lift you up without breaking a sweat. there was no use in fighting, you had no choice but to give in and let this conversation go. once his lips crashed into yours, everything faded to black. as if a simple kiss was the cure-all of mending this decrepit relationship.

sunghoon’s forehead pressed against yours as he pulled away, “shhh, lye down baby,” he hushes your quiet mewls, instructing you to do as he says. “gonna make you feel so good,” his hands slid under your skirt, gently rubbing over your clothed core “you’ll forget everything.”

* :.･ﾟﾟ･ ✿

“oh my- fuckk, sunghoon!” you cry out, almost on the verge of tears just from how skilled he is, rutting your hips upwards into his mouth as he devours you whole.

the pace of his tongue is relentless, roughly lapping up all your juices like he’s the most starved man alive. you’ve lost count at the amount of times he’s already made you come undone just from his mouth alone. your body’s buzzing with titillation, all you can do is scream and clench your pussy around nothing while he fiercely sucks on your clit.

you couldn’t stop twitching, feeling yet another orgasm approaching. your legs anchored over his shoulders, unable to think or speak coherent sentences as his face was fully buried into your sloppy cunt. he relaxes his jaw a bit more, going all the way from the bottom inching further up as he comes back in contact with your puffy clit. at any given moment it feels as if your heart’s about to stop.

“hoon-” your heads thrown back into the pillow, digging your nails into his shoulder blades from how overly sensitive you are. “n-need to cum.. can feel it. m’so close.” it surprises you when you’re able to even express such words.

a low grunt can be heard underneath, sunghoon loves hearing you— it’s arguably the best part about going down on you. the hand that wasn’t occupied went straight to gripping a fistful of his ebony hair, continuously moaning his name so loud that you genuinely feel bad for whomever the unlucky people that got to hear this.

just when you thought it couldn’t get anymore intense, he slips 2 of his slender fingers inside, making you gasp from the overwhelming sensation. flashes of white invade your vision, violently shaking as your lips form an “o” in the throes of ecstasy. sunghoon knows your body so well that this is nothing for him, he’s got it all down to a simple science. no one knows your body like he does, and especially no one can make you cum as hard as he can.

“go ahead, make a mess for me baby,” he strongly encourages, picking up his pace as his digits fuck into you faster. “just gonna clean it up with my tongue all over again.”

your eyes roll back to the depths of oblivion, feeling an out of body experience when reaching your climax. a string of curses leaves your shaky breath, limbs trembling and faint tears stain your flushed cheeks. sunghoon slows his movements, rubbing his thumb over your clit gently to make you even more sensitive. you love the way he calls you “good girl” and how proud the look on his face becomes while you ride out your orgasm on his fingers. he doesn’t stop showering you with compliments, only ramping up his affection as he plants fleeting kisses to your thighs, hips, and stomach.

once he’s finally come back up for air you grab his face to pull him into your lips again. moaning in his mouth while getting a taste of yourself was probably the hottest thing sunghoon’s ever witnessed.

“can’t believe this is all mine.” sunghoon whispers against you, gently massaging your aching thighs. “i love you so much, baby.”

“love you too hoon.” you instantly say back, feeling more at ease now that things are somewhat back to normal.

maybe a break isn’t necessary after all, how else would you be able to have such earth shattering orgasms?

- 完 ♡︎

[odileeclipse]

In the Presence of Truth {"Sage of Truth" (SMC) x Reader} PT 20

<<<Previous Next>>>

Shadow Milk Cookie stilled as your fingers brushed against his hand. A rare hesitation flickered across his expression, golden eyes flickering between your touch and your face, as if weighing the weight of what you had just done what you had just said. You swallowed hard, fingers tightening around his own before you lost the nerve. “I know you’re not leaving yet,” you murmured. “But when you do… I want to be there.” 

His gaze softened, just barely. You exhaled, steadying yourself. “I know, in the grand span of your existence, I’m just…” You hesitated, struggling to find the right words. 

“I know I’m small. A fleeting part of something much bigger. But… even if it’s just for a little while, I want to be part of that.”

A breath. A pause. Your heart pounded in the silence. Shadow Milk Cookie didn’t pull away. He didn’t move at all, save for the slight way his fingers flexed beneath yours, as if he, too, was coming to terms with what this moment meant. “You think yourself small,” he said finally, his voice quieter than you had ever heard it. “Do you truly believe that?”

You bit your lip. “Aren’t I?” He exhaled slowly, his free hand curling into a loose fist against the desk. His voice, when he spoke again, was measured careful, deliberate.

“Your existence does not need to stretch across centuries to hold weight.” Your breath hitched. For a moment, neither of you spoke. Then, gently almost hesitantly he turned his palm beneath yours, letting your fingers settle properly against his own. 

His grip wasn’t tight, wasn’t overwhelming. Just steady. “I cannot promise you eternity, you don’t have eternity” he murmured. 

“But… I will not turn you away from the time I can offer.” 

You squeezed his hand, blinking hard against the sudden sting in your eyes. “That’s all I wanted to hear.”

Shadow Milk Cookie studied you, his gaze as unreadable as ever yet, for once, you felt like you understood him perfectly. And, for now, that was enough.Your fingers trembled slightly as they curled around his, grounding yourself in the warmth of his touch. He didn’t pull away didn’t flinch, didn’t retreat behind carefully constructed walls of logic and reason. But he also didn’t answer, not immediately. You exhaled.

“You won’t be leaving for the Spire for a long time…I know that.” Your voice was steadier than you expected, though the weight in your chest only grew heavier with each word. “But when you do… if you do… I don’t want to be just another passing thought in your long existence.”

Shadow Milk Cookie’s gaze flickered, something unreadable shifting in the depths of his golden eyes. “I want to be there,” you continued, gripping his hand just a little tighter. “For however long I can be.” A slow inhale. His fingers curled around yours, but his expression remained frustratingly composed. “You have always have a choice,” he murmured. “I would never-” 

“I know that,” you interrupted, shaking your head. “I know you’d never ask me for anything. But what if I want to be here? What if I don’t care how small a part of your life I am?” 

His lips parted slightly, but you pressed on, unwilling to let him slip away this time. “What do you want me to be?” you asked, flipping the question back on him. “Not what I think, not what I assume. What do you want?”

Silence. Not the kind that stretched into avoidance or the kind he wielded like a shield when words became too dangerous. This was different. He was considering it. 

You swallowed, watching him closely. “Do you want me to be just another student? Another scholar you’ve guided, another moment in time that passes?” Shadow Milk Cookie exhaled, slow and measured, as if he were calculating every possible outcome before speaking.

 “You know I don’t waste my time on things that do not matter,” he finally said.

 “That’s not an answer.” His fingers tightened just slightly over yours. “It is the only answer I can give.”

 You shook your head, frustration bubbling beneath your ribs. “No. No, it’s not. You-you don’t hesitate like this. You always know what to say, so why-” 

“Because you do matter.” Your breath hitched. His voice was quieter now, but no less certain. “That is what frightens me.” Your grip faltered. He did not let go. Shadow Milk Cookie’s gaze was steady, unwavering. “You ask what we are,” he murmured. “And yet, even if I were to name it, even if I were to claim something beyond what is already unspoken… what would it change?” 

“…Everything,” you whispered. He inhaled sharply. The silence that followed was deafening. Then, in a voice barely above a breath, he admitted, “Perhaps that is what I fear the most.”

The weight of his words settled between you, heavy and fragile all at once. He had always known the answer of course he had. But saying it aloud? Acknowledging it, accepting it? That was the truth neither of you had dared to face. You swallowed hard. “Then let’s face it.”

 Shadow Milk Cookie’s fingers curled more securely around yours, as if anchoring himself. And this time, he didn’t argue. You exhaled, a small, breathy laugh escaping despite the weight pressing against your chest.

 “Okay,” you murmured, tilting your head slightly, a teasing lilt threading through your voice. “Let’s pretend, then.” 

Shadow Milk Cookie blinked, caught off guard by the shift in tone. “Pretend?” You nodded, squeezing his hand just slightly. “Just for a moment. Let’s say you’re not the Sage of Truth. You’re not immortal. You’re just… you. Just Shadow Milk.” 

His expression didn’t change at first, but something in his posture shifted something small, nearly imperceptible, like the brief flicker of candlelight in a draft. “And what would that change?” he asked quietly. You shrugged. “Maybe nothing. Maybe everything.” You let out a soft hum, letting your fingers brush over his palm absentmindedly. “It means you don’t have to worry about forever. It means we don’t have to think about centuries, or what happens when I’m gone. It means we’re just… here. Right now.”

His lips parted slightly, but he didn’t speak. “You always ask me questions,” you mused, tilting your head. “So here’s one for you, Shadow Milk. If we were both mortal, if time wasn’t something hanging over us like a stormcloud… what would you want?” His fingers twitched against yours. His golden eyes, so often filled with certainty, wavered for the briefest second. 

“…I do not know,” he admitted.

 You let out a quiet chuckle. “Liar.” His gaze snapped back to you, startled, and you laughed outright this time, shaking your head. “You always know, Shadow Milk. You knew the answer before I even asked. But you don’t want to say it, because saying it makes it real.” 

His grip on your hand tightened firm, grounding, as if he needed something solid to hold onto. “Words are powerful things,” he murmured. “They shape reality. They define truths.”

 You smiled, softer now. “Then define this. Just for today, just for right now. No centuries, no titles. Just you and me. What are we?” Shadow Milk Cookie inhaled deeply, his gaze searching yours as if looking for an escape, a loophole something that would let him evade the truth he had spent so long avoiding. But there was none. For once, the Sage of Truth had been backed into a corner. And you weren’t letting him go.

A beat of silence stretched between you, thick and unspoken. His fingers were still wrapped around yours, warm and steady, but he had yet to answer. You exhaled, tilting your head slightly, a teasing lilt creeping into your voice as you murmured, “This is where they kiss. You know, like real people do.”

 Shadow Milk Cookie froze. It was barely noticeable just the slightest hitch in his breath, the way his fingers twitched against yours, the way his golden eyes flickered with something unreadable. Then, slowly, he exhaled. A soft, measured thing. “Is that so?” You shrugged, feigning nonchalance, but the way your pulse hammered in your throat betrayed you. “That’s how it usually goes,” you mused, your thumb brushing absently over the back of his hand. 

“A conversation like this. A moment like this.” You looked up at him, searching his face. “That’s what happens next.”

 His expression didn’t shift, not entirely, but his grip on your hand tightened just slightly, just enough for you to notice. “A logical conclusion,” he murmured. “And yet…”

 You raised a brow. “And yet?” 

Shadow Milk Cookie’s gaze held yours, unwavering. “You are not speaking in absolutes,” he noted, quiet and thoughtful. “Not this time.”

Your breath caught. He was right. You weren’t saying this is what we should do. You weren’t making a move, weren’t leaning in like this was some storybook ending. You had simply left it in the air, dangling between you like a choice waiting to be made. And he knew that. Of course, he knew that. Your heart pounded as he studied you, the weight of his attention pressing down on you like a question you weren’t sure how to answer. You swallowed. “Would you want that?”

 The words were quieter than before, softer, hesitant in a way that made them feel more real. “If we were-” You gestured vaguely between you. “If we were just people.”

 Shadow Milk Cookie’s thumb ghosted over your knuckles, the barest movement. He didn’t answer right away. Then, finally, he murmured, “Perhaps.” Perhaps. 

The word settled over you like a slow-burning ember, curling warm in your chest. It wasn’t a yes. It wasn’t a no. It was something more dangerous. Something real. Your fingers curled slightly around his, your voice barely above a whisper now.

“Then what are you waiting for?” Shadow Milk Cookie’s lips parted just slightly, just enough for you to see the words forming behind his teeth, the answer he hadn’t yet spoken. But he didn’t say it. Not yet. You swallowed hard, suddenly aware of how close you were, of the way your fingers curled around his without thinking. Where had that boldness even come from? It wasn’t like you wasn’t like you at all to say something so forward.

Your grip slackened, but Shadow Milk Cookie didn’t let go. His hold was steady, grounding, as if he had already anticipated the moment you would retreat into yourself. You exhaled, barely a whisper of a laugh escaping you. “I don’t know why I said that.” 

Your voice was quieter now, tinged with something unsure, something fragile. Shadow Milk Cookie tilted his head, watching you with quiet amusement, though there was a softness there too. “Then take it back,” he murmured.

 You hesitated. You could. You could laugh it off, call it a joke, shift the moment into something safer, something easier. But the words still hung in the air, lingering like an unanswered question. Your fingers twitched against his. “…Do you want me to?” That was what it all came down to, wasn’t it? His expression remained unreadable for a moment longer before something in him shifted, something quieter, something almost careful. “No,” he said, just as soft. Your breath hitched. You weren’t expecting him to say that not so plainly, not so surely.

You lowered your gaze, heart pounding, the heat crawling up your neck making it impossible to meet his eyes. “I just… I don’t know what I’m doing.” The confession left you before you could stop it. “I don’t even know why I said that-I wasn’t thinking-” Shadow Milk Cookie chuckled, low and thoughtful. “Clearly.” You groaned, covering your face with your free hand. 

“You don’t have to agree so fast.” A pause, and then you felt him shift ever so slightly closer. 

“And yet,” he mused, “you haven’t let go.” You hadn’t. Your fingers were still tangled with his, caught in that moment of hesitation. Your pulse thundered in your ears. “I-” You swallowed, suddenly feeling impossibly small beneath the weight of his attention. 

You shook your head, trying to find something to say, anything that could make this feel less overwhelming. “I just-just pretend, okay? Pretend we’re-” You stopped yourself, heat crawling higher up your neck. 

Shadow Milk Cookie arched a brow, waiting. “Pretend we’re what?” You squeezed your eyes shut, mortified. “…Just pretend we’re both mortal.”

 Your voice was barely above a whisper. “Pretend you’re not the Sage of Truth. That you’re just-just Shadow Milk.” 

Silence. You didn’t dare look at him. Then, after what felt like an eternity, you heard him exhale, something slow and deliberate. “…Very well.”

 His voice was softer now, still measured, still precise, but holding something gentler at the edges. You dared a peek at him, only to find his golden gaze fixed on you steady, patient, but different now. Not as a mentor, not as the Sage of Truth. Just him.

 Your fingers curled a little tighter around his, your heart hammering in your chest. “Okay,” you breathed.

 Shadow Milk Cookie hummed, tilting his head slightly, his voice quiet as he asked, “And now?” You had no idea. But for now, this the warmth of his hand in yours, the moment held between you was enough.

You let out a shaky breath, your pulse a wild, stammering thing beneath your skin. You couldn't believe you were about to say this couldn’t believe you had even thought it. And yet, the words came anyway, tumbling from your lips before you could stop them. "We should just kiss… like real people do." 

The moment the sentence left your mouth, you regretted it. Heat surged up your neck, crawling up your face so fast you thought you might actually die of embarrassment. What had possessed you to say that? Shadow Milk Cookie stilled. The silence that followed was suffocating. You wanted to take it back. You wanted the floor to swallow you whole. You wanted-Then he exhaled. Soft, measured. A slow release of breath that sent a shiver through you. And when you finally dared to look up at him, really look at him, your stomach flipped. Because he wasn’t laughing. He wasn’t teasing. He wasn’t even giving you that knowing, amused look that usually accompanied your flustered remarks.

No, his gaze was something else entirely. Something bare. Something unguarded. Shadow Milk Cookie who always carried himself with such composure, who always wielded words like blades and knowledge like armor; was not shielding himself now. He was allowing himself this moment. Allowing himself to want. Your breath hitched. His golden eyes, so sharp in their scrutiny, softened not in amusement, not in calculation, but in something deeply, impossibly tender. Something that made your chest ache. “…You say the most dangerous things,” he murmured at last, voice as steady as ever, yet so much warmer than before.

Your entire body burned. “Don’t say it like that-” His lips curled slightly, and yet there was no deflection, no teasing edge. Instead, his fingers, still lightly curled around yours, tightened just enough to hold you here. Just enough to make sure this moment this fragile, terrifying, inevitable moment did not slip away. Shadow Milk Cookie was never one to rush, never one to move without certainty. But this time, there was no hesitation. 

No grand declaration. No warning. Just the quiet, steady motion of him leaning in of his lips brushing against yours in a touch so deliberate, so unshaken, that it felt more like a truth than a kiss. A truth neither of you had spoken aloud. But one you had both known all along. Your heart stopped then raced, breath stuttering as you melted into the feeling, as you let yourself fall into it, into him. For just a moment- There was no Sage of Truth. No fleeting mortal life against eternity.

No barriers at all. Just you and him. Your fingers curled tighter around his, a tether between you and something vast, something terrifying. A bridge across the unfathomable expanse of time itself. You held on as if the moment would dissolve the second you loosened your grip, as if he were sand slipping through your fingers, as if he were the wind that would slip away the second you forgot to chase it. Shadow Milk Cookie did not pull away.

He could have. He could have met your touch with the cool distance of a scholar observing, the quiet dismissal of a man who had seen centuries pass and would see centuries more. But instead, he stayed. His fingers flexed once, his palm pressing against yours, grounding you both in something real, something fleeting, something infinite. His voice, when it came, was soft softer than the morning hush before dawn, softer than the reverence of untouched parchment waiting for ink. “You fear letting go.” 

Not a question. A truth spoken aloud, as though he could taste it on his tongue. You swallowed, nodding. Your throat ached with words you weren’t brave enough to speak, with the weight of something too fragile to name. “Yes.”

 He exhaled, a slow and measured thing, his thumb brushing once across your knuckles, like the stroke of a calligrapher’s pen, careful and deliberate. “You will not lose this.” Your breath shuddered, and you hated how easily he unraveled you. Hated how effortlessly he saw through you, how he could speak the one thing you had tried to convince yourself of and make it sound like it had been written into the stars long before you had the courage to wonder. 

“But…” You hesitated, your grip tightening. “I’m afraid that if I let go, this moment will disappear. That I will wake up tomorrow and realize I imagined it. That I will turn back and find you already gone.” Your voice was quiet, a whisper in the space between you, but it landed heavy, enough to pull down constellations. His expression shifted something small, something imperceptible to anyone but you.

The careful composure of the Sage of Truth faltered, peeled back by something older, something deeper. His gaze swept over your face, and then, as if sealing something sacred, something too delicate to disturb he lifted your joined hands, cradling them between his own, reverent as a scholar handling a fragile manuscript, as a believer holding an unspoken prayer. “Then do not let go,” he murmured. It was not a demand. It was not even an answer. It was an offering.

Your breath stilled. Because the truth was there, nestled between the cracks of time, between your fingers laced with his. It was in the way his hands did not tremble but held steady, like an anchor against the tide. It was in the way his eyes softened, no longer gilded with the weight of wisdom, but something rawer, something human.

For the first time, you did not see the Sage of Truth, the scholar who would outlive ages, the man carved into history’s pages. You saw him. And that terrified you. But not enough to let go. Your fingers curled against his, grounding yourself in his warmth, in the undeniable realness of this moment. You swallowed, words gathering at the edge of your tongue, unspoken but waiting aching to be said. “The Spire of Knowledge…” you began, voice quieter than you meant it to be. His golden gaze flickered, watching you carefully, waiting. You took a breath, steadying yourself before continuing, “I want to go with you.” 

The silence between you stretched, thick and heavy, like the pause between turning pages of a book whose ending you were afraid to reach. Shadow Milk Cookie did not answer immediately. He did not deflect, did not twist your words back on you as he so often did. Instead, his thumb brushed absently along the back of your hand, slow and deliberate, as if considering something weighty, something fragile. “You would leave the Academy,” he mused, the words more observation than question. You nodded. “If it meant being there.”

 Another pause. His fingers curled ever so slightly around yours, and for a brief moment, you thought he might say yes. “You seek knowledge?” he asked, tilting his head slightly. “Or something else?”

 You hesitated. You knew the answer. And so did he. “…Both,” you admitted. His lips parted, as if to speak, but then he exhaled through his nose, a slow, measured thing. When he finally spoke, his voice was softer than you’d ever heard it. 

“You know that it will not be the same.” You blinked up at him. “I don’t expect it to be.” 

He regarded you for a long moment, his gaze searching. “You wish to follow me.” 

“Yes.” 

“To learn?” 

“Yes.” 

“To stay?” 

Your breath caught in your throat. A beat of silence. Then, carefully, he continued, 

“Even knowing that I am as I am?”

 You swallowed, nodding. “Even knowing that.”

His expression did not falter, but something in his gaze shifted something small, something you couldn’t quite place. A hesitation, perhaps. Or maybe something deeper, something unspoken, something close to fear. “I do not know if I can allow it.” 

Your stomach twisted. “Why?” His fingers, still entwined with yours, flexed slightly a reflex, maybe, as if steadying himself. “Because I do not wish to be the reason you leave behind the life you have built.” 

You shook your head. “I’m not leaving behind anything.” He exhaled, as if to say, You are. You bit your lip. “You once said you do not waste words,” you murmured, voice barely above a whisper. “So tell me, honestly…if I went, would you want me there?” 

A flicker of something unreadable passed through his expression, too brief to name. Then, so softly you almost missed it “Yes.”

 Your breath stilled. The word settled between you, heavy and quiet, a truth neither of you had dared to voice until now. You wet your lips, trying to steady yourself. “Then let me prove myself.” Shadow Milk Cookie blinked. “If you truly cannot allow it now,” you continued, pressing forward before doubt could take root, “then let me earn it. You’re always telling me to seek truth, to strive for knowledge…so let me show you I’m worthy of the Spire.”

 A pause. Then, his gaze softened. Not in amusement, not in pity, but in quiet consideration. “…You would do this?” he murmured. “For the chance to follow me?” 

You held his gaze. “I would.” He studied you for a long, breathless moment. Then, slowly, his lips curled into something small so small, but unmistakably real. “Then prove it.” Your chest tightened, something warm curling beneath your ribs. “I will.” His fingers remained in yours a moment longer before, with painstaking gentleness, he loosened his grip just enough to allow you the choice to hold on or let go. You didn’t let go.

Shadow Milk Cookie’s gaze remained steady, unreadable, as he listened. His fingers still lingered in yours, the warmth of his hand grounding you, but his expression betrayed nothing. He was listening, but you knew that whatever conclusion he reached, he would not speak it before he was ready. 

Taking a slow breath, you pressed forward. “I have to go with a research lab anyway for the fall semester,” you explained. “It’s part of my studies part of my path. If the Spire is taking in students for research, then… if I applied, if my friends applied, none of us would have to give anything up.” A long silence stretched between you.

 You could hear your own heartbeat, the sound of your own breath. Finally, Shadow Milk Cookie’s golden eyes flickered, shifting from yours to some distant place beyond the room, as if weighing the possibility against every law of reason and logic. His thumb brushed absently over the back of your hand, a reflexive movement, slow and thoughtful. “You would truly consider this?” he murmured, voice quieter now. “Not only for me, but for yourselves?” 

You nodded. “It wouldn’t be throwing anything away. It would be a step forward. Just… a different one than I originally thought.” He exhaled through his nose, his grip on your hand tightening for the briefest moment before he pulled back not out of rejection, but out of the need for space to think, to weigh, to decide. “The Spire’s research program is going to be rigorous,” he said, more to himself than to you. “Only the most dedicated students will be considered.”

 “I know.” You straightened. “And I can prove I belong there.” His gaze flickered back to you, searching, as if waiting for hesitation to crack through your resolve. It didn’t. You had already made up your mind. “Your friends,” he said slowly. “Do they know?”

 “Not yet.” You hesitated. “But I know them. They’ll want to go, too.” Shadow Milk Cookie leaned back in his chair, studying you with the same careful precision he always did except now, there was something else, something softer, something almost hesitant. “…It would not be an easy path.”

 “It never has been.” You smiled, though your chest was tight. “But that’s never stopped me before.” His lips parted slightly, as if he meant to speak to refute, to agree, you weren’t sure but he hesitated. The Sage of Truth had no immediate answer. You could feel it. The weight of something shifting. The possibility of something real. Finally, he inhaled slowly, deliberately, and nodded. “Then we shall see what the future holds.”

Shadow Milk Cookie’s gaze didn’t waver. His fingers, warm and steady around yours, curled just slightly, as if to tether you both to this moment this fragile, trembling thing balanced between truth and uncertainty. “You wish for a name,” he murmured, voice softer than you had ever heard it. “Very well.”

 You held your breath. He lifted your intertwined hands slightly, the faintest smile ghosting the edges of his lips not a scholar’s smile, not the measured amusement of the Sage of Truth, but something quieter. Something that belonged only to him. “You are not a fleeting moment,” he said, as though carving the words into existence. “Nor a passing thought. Nor a scholar I merely guide.” His thumb traced absently against the back of your hand, reverent in its slowness. “You are the one who has unraveled me.”

Your chest tightened, breath catching in your throat. Shadow Milk Cookie was not a man who spoke lightly. Every word he uttered was deliberate, measured, a truth only spoken when he was ready for it to be known. And now, here he was, offering it freely, without hesitation.

“You are the one I have chosen to see,” he continued, voice steady, yet so unbearably tender. “And if you will have me” his gaze held yours, unwavering “then you are mine, as I am yours.” It was not a question. It was an answer. The only answer. Your fingers tightened around his instinctively, and his smile small, barely there softened at the edges, like candlelight flickering in the dark. “You asked me what we are,” he murmured, as if drawing the words from the very air between you. His free hand lifted, the faintest brush of his fingertips against your cheek light, fleeting, as if even he was afraid this moment might shatter if he dared press harder. “We are something true,” he whispered. “Something that will not fade.”

 Your heart stilled. And then, before you could even think to stop yourself, you surged forward, closing the distance between you. You pulled away, voice unsteady. “Even when I’m gone?” The words were barely a whisper. “Even then?” His eyes searched yours, as if mapping the shape of your uncertainty, the fear tucked between your ribs like a delicate thing you were too afraid to hold. And then, quietly, he answered. 

“Yes.” The weight of it settled into your bones. A truth spoken with the same certainty he had always carried, as if there were no hesitation, no room for doubt. As if the inevitability of time did not change the way he felt. Your fingers trembled against his, but he held firm. “You speak as if my truth is bound by time,” he murmured, his voice something softer than you had ever heard. “As if it will wither in your absence.”

 Your throat tightened. “Won’t it?” He exhaled, and though his gaze remained steady, you saw something deep in it, something almost terrifying in its certainty. “No,” he said simply. “Because it is you.” 

A shiver ran down your spine. “I will exist for centuries more,” he continued, as if laying the words carefully, reverently at your feet. “And yet, for the first time, I find myself bound not by knowledge, but by you.” You tried to breathe, tried to process the weight of what he was saying, but it was impossible. Because he was looking at you like you were something real, something permanent, despite everything you weren’t.

 You swallowed. “That’s unfair.”

 “Perhaps,” he murmured. “And yet, it is truth.” Your fingers curled against his palm, your chest tight with something you weren’t sure had a name. You had thought, no feared that one day, you would become nothing more than a footnote in his long, unyielding existence. That he would outlive you, move forward as he always had, and one day, you would be just another fragment of memory. 

But this felt different. “…Even then?” you whispered again, afraid to believe it. Shadow Milk Cookie, the Sage of Truth, the one who had always held the answers you weren’t ready to face, lifted your hand gently to his lips. Not in haste. Not in possession. But in a truth so absolute it could be carved into stone. He kissed your knuckles, reverent, unshaken. “Yes,” he murmured against your skin. “Even then.”

"I don’t think I want to study today." The words left your lips before you could second-guess them, barely more than a breath between you. Shadow Milk Cookie regarded you with his usual quiet patience, his golden gaze steady, measuring. If he was surprised by your admission, he did not show it. Instead, he simply tilted his head, his grip on your hand unwavering. "Is that so?" You swallowed, nodding. "Just for today. Just… pretend. A little while longer." 

His fingers, still loosely tangled with yours, flexed slightly a nearly imperceptible motion, one that sent a shiver down your spine. "And what would you have me pretend?"

You exhaled, tightening your hold on his hand, as if afraid that if you let go, this moment would slip through your fingers like water. "That we aren’t ourselves for a little while. That you aren’t the Sage of Truth, that I’m not just another passing scholar." Your voice softened, growing smaller. "That there’s nothing else waiting beyond today." A pause. Finally, he spoke. "Very well." 

And just like that, the weight of study, of the Spire of Knowledge, of all the unspoken things hanging between you faded. You led him through the winding corridors of the Academy, past the looming stacks of books and echoing lecture halls, past the paths you’d always walked with a purpose, a destination. But today, there was no purpose beyond this. No destination beyond him. The Academy Gardens stretched out before you, golden light filtering through the arching willows, the air thick with the scent of jasmine and damp earth.

The reflecting pool shimmered in the afternoon sun, koi-like spirits drifting lazily beneath the surface, undisturbed by the weight of time. You sank onto your favorite bench beneath the willow tree, releasing a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding.

He followed, his movements deliberate, his presence unshakable. For a while, there was only silence. The kind that wasn’t uncomfortable, wasn’t empty, but full brimming with the weight of everything left unsaid. You closed your eyes, tilting your head back against the rough bark of the willow. "If we were different people," you murmured, "where do you think we’d be right now?" 

A soft hum, thoughtful. "That depends. Who would we be?" 

"Anyone," you said, cracking an eye open to glance at him. "Not a Sage, not a scholar. Just… anyone." He was quiet for a long moment, gaze fixed on the rippling water before you. Then, so softly you almost missed it "Perhaps we would not be here at all." 

Your heart clenched. He did not say it in a way that implied loss, nor longing, nor regret. It was merely a truth, simple and undeniable. A truth that, like all others, he could not ignore. You exhaled, turning your gaze back to the sky, watching as the willow’s golden leaves swayed in the breeze. "Then I’m glad we are who we are." 

His head tilted slightly, considering. "Even if it means you must one day leave?" You hesitated but only for a moment. Then, with a small smile, you turned to him, eyes shining with something steadfast. "Yes."

 For the first time since you had met him, he looked away first. The quiet stretched, deeper than before, until finally, his hand shifted beneath yours, his fingers curling around yours with a gentleness that felt almost reverent. "Then, for today," he murmured, voice steady but softer, "let us be only this." And so, you sat there together, the afternoon sun slipping lower, time stretching out like an unbroken thread between you. For today, there were no titles.

No responsibilities. No future waiting beyond the edges of the moment. For today, you were just you. And he was just Shadow Milk. You sighed dramatically, stretching your legs out before you, the warmth of the afternoon sun settling against your skin like a familiar weight.

 "Alright," you began, glancing at him from the corner of your eye, "serious question."

Shadow Milk Cookie hummed, tilting his head ever so slightly. "I am listening." "If a koi spirit jumped out of the reflecting pool right now and challenged you to a duel, would you accept?" There was a pause brief, measured before he responded, as though he was actually considering it. "On what grounds does this koi spirit issue its challenge?" 

You grinned. "Honor. Obviously." His lips twitched, and you caught the faintest glimmer of amusement in his golden gaze. "Then it would be rude to refuse." 

You gasped, placing a hand over your chest in mock offense. "You'd fight a koi spirit? Just like that?"

 "A challenge is a challenge," he said smoothly. "It would be dishonorable to leave it unanswered." 

You scoffed. "Unbelievable. I thought you were above fighting fish."

 He arched a brow. "This one appears to be capable of speech. That implies a certain level of intellect and self-awareness. It would not be just a fish." 

You huffed, rolling your eyes. "Okay, fine. Next question: if you had to choose between being turned into a frog or an owl, which would you pick?" 

"A frog," he answered without hesitation. You blinked. "Really?" 

"Frogs are well-versed in patience," he mused. "They wait, they observe. And should they need to move, they do so with purpose."

 You stared at him, mouth slightly agape. "You really put thought into that." 

"I put thought into everything," he said, as if this were the most obvious thing in the world. You groaned, dragging a hand down your face. "And I thought I could get you with nonsense."

His expression softened slightly, something amused yet fond lurking in his gaze. "Would you prefer that I answer mindlessly?" 

You huffed, crossing your arms. "No, but I'd like to win for once." He exhaled a quiet laugh. "Then ask a question you know the answer to." 

You squinted at him. "Is that your way of admitting you outthink me every time?" 

"It is merely an observation," he said, as though he hadn't just absolutely confirmed it. You groaned again, flopping back against the bench. "You're impossible."

 "And yet," he murmured, looking at you with something you couldn't quite name, "you continue to try." Your breath hitched. For a moment, the playful back-and-forth stilled, the air between you shifting into something quieter, something heavier and warmer. You swallowed, forcing yourself to focus, grasping at the familiar rhythm between you before it slipped away."Alright, last one," you said, clearing your throat.

 "Do you think birds ever get jealous of fish?" Shadow Milk Cookie hummed.

 "Perhaps," he said thoughtfully. "They are both creatures of the sky, after all. It is merely that one has chosen the water as its sky, while the other soars above it." 

You blinked at him. "That was… strangely poetic." He glanced at you, tilting his head slightly. "Is that surprising?" 

You shook your head. "No, it's just… You make even nonsense sound like a revelation." Shadow Milk Cookie chuckled. "Then perhaps nonsense is simply another form of truth."

 You snorted. "Now you're just making things up."

 "However" he mused, watching you with that same, unreadable softness, "you continue to listen." You looked at him. The golden light of the setting sun caught the edges of his features, tracing the line of his jaw, the curve of his lips, the sharp yet gentle intensity of his gaze. And for a moment, the playful rhythm between you faltered not in discomfort, not in hesitation, but in something else entirely. Something unspoken. Something undeniable. Your heart pounded against your ribs. You licked your lips, voice barely above a whisper.

 "Yeah," you murmured. "I do." for once he did not have a clever reply.

Your fingers twitched at your sides, hovering just over the space between you. You weren’t sure what possessed you, what made the thought turn into action, but before you could stop yourself, your hand lifted hesitant, reverent. His hair, now unshielded by his ever-present hat, flowed like a celestial river, strands shifting like currents beneath an unseen tide. It caught the fading light of the day, sparkling in its depths, cascading from a deep, endless blue to something lighter, softer like twilight melting into dawn. You had seen the stars before.

Had spent nights gazing up at them, wondering what it would be like to hold something so vast, so distant, so unreachable. But now, as the strands of his hair shifted like galaxies within reach, it felt as though the heavens had unfurled before you within your grasp if you dared. Your fingers finally brushed against the strands, barely grazing at first. They were impossibly soft, weightless in a way that felt unearthly. They moved with an almost liquid grace, drifting as though suspended in water, responding to your touch with a slow, shimmering ripple.

Shadow Milk Cookie remained perfectly still beneath your touch, his golden eyes half-lidded, unreadable. He did not pull away. Did not speak. He only watched as your fingers curled slightly, allowing more of the strands to slip between them, the sensation something akin to holding stardust in your palms. 

“Your hair…” you murmured, voice barely above a whisper, entranced. “It’s like…” You trailed off, unable to put words to something so quietly breathtaking. A beat of silence. Then softly, almost imperceptibly he tilted his head just slightly into your touch. A silent permission. A quiet surrender. Your breath caught, but you didn’t pull away. For a moment, there was no weight of knowledge between you, just the quiet ripple of silver-blue strands between your fingers, the warmth of his gaze settled upon you like something endless.

And the realization that, perhaps, this moment was already written among the stars. Your fingers twitched in his hair, the shimmering strands slipping between them like a river of stardust. His breath hitched not loud, not sharp, but there, unmistakable, like the briefest hesitation in an otherwise steady rhythm. 

You looked at him then, and for once, he wasn’t composed. Shadow Milk Cookie, the Sage of Truth, the Fount of Knowledge, the one who always knew, always had the answer, always understood was caught off guard. There was color rising to his face, faint but undeniable, dusting his cheeks like the first blush of dawn. His eyes, wide and uncertain, flickered to yours, as if searching for something confirmation, permission, understanding. And for the first time, you had it before he did. The realization struck something deep within you, a warmth blooming in your chest, and maybe that was why you did what you did next. 

You leaned in. No hesitation, no second-guessing, no overthinking just a quiet, breathless pull toward something inevitable. Your lips met his, soft and fleeting, a touch so light it could have been mistaken for a whisper. But it was real. He stiffened beneath you, just for a moment, before something in him melted. His hair shimmered beneath your hands, shifting like the tide, and the warmth of him something you had never let yourself imagine settled against your skin. And then, as if the weight of what had just happened had finally hit him, Shadow Milk Cookie blushed. 

The blue deepened, blooming across his face like dawn spilling over the horizon. His lips parted ever so slightly, golden eyes searching yours with something almost lost as if he had spent centuries preparing for every answer but this one. Your heart pounded. “…I-I don’t know why I did that,” you stammered, voice barely above a whisper. He swallowed. You saw it the slow, deliberate motion, as if he needed a moment to process what had just happened. Then, against all odds, his fingers lifted, barely grazing his lips, stunned.

 “You…” His voice trailed off, as if the words had left him. His brows furrowed, his breath uneven. “You kissed me.” Your face burned. “Yes,” you squeaked. A pause. Then “Why?” You groaned, hiding your face in your hands. “I don’t know! It just-it felt right!” A stunned silence stretched between you, thick and heavy, before you dared to peek through your fingers only to see him looking away, face still stained with color, still lost in whatever thought had rendered him silent. You had never seen him like this before. Shadow Milk Cookie blushing. “…You are impossible,” he muttered at last, voice quieter than usual. 

You swallowed, hands lowering slowly. “And?” He hesitated. His fingers curled slightly at his sides. “…And you are infuriatingly endearing,” he admitted, voice just barely above a whisper. That did not help your heartbeat. You opened your mouth maybe to deflect, maybe to tease, maybe to kiss him again…but before you could, he did something you had never seen him do before. He turned his face away from you entirely, one hand lifting to press against his cheek as if he could will away the blush entirely.

Your breath stilled. You had broken him. Shadow Milk Cookie, the ever-composed, ever-patient Sage of Truth had lost his composure. And something about that made you grin, a slow, dazed thing, your heart soaring at the sight. “…You’re really blushing,” you murmured. His shoulders tensed slightly, but he did not refute it. And that was a victory all on its own.

The afternoon slipped through your fingers like grains of sand, the weight of time momentarily forgotten. The golden glow of the sky softened, shifting into the first whispers of twilight, and yet neither of you moved, not really. Conversation had ebbed and flowed, drifting from nonsensical musings to quiet contemplation, yet the lingering warmth between you remained. Neither of you acknowledged the inevitable how the day had unraveled so quickly, how the moment of parting was drawing closer with every breath. You exhaled, fingers still loosely curled around the fabric of his sleeve.

 “It’s late,” you murmured, though it wasn’t quite an announcement, more of a realization spoken aloud. Shadow Milk Cookie hummed, his golden gaze flickering to the horizon. “Yes.” You hesitated, glancing toward the academy. “My friends… they must be waiting for me.” 

You shifted slightly, as if testing the idea of leaving, of untangling yourself from this moment, but your fingers remained where they were lingering, reluctant. “Or… they will be waiting for me.” Shadow Milk Cookie did not immediately reply. He merely studied you, expression unreadable, before exhaling in quiet amusement. 

“So which is it, then?”

 You smiled, soft and knowing. “Both.” A faint chuckle left him, the sound gentle as the breeze. He made no move to stop you, nor did he urge you to go. He simply existed there with you, silent in his own acceptance. You swallowed, hesitating for one final moment before, with great reluctance, you began to pull away. His fingers twitched just barely.

A movement so minuscule you could have ignored it, could have dismissed it as nothing at all. But you didn’t. Because you felt it. Your breath caught, your eyes flickering to his hand the one that had not quite let go of the space between you. His grip was not tight, not demanding. But it lingered. Just as you had. And for a fleeting second, you thought maybe he doesn’t want this to end either. The thought sent something warm fluttering in your chest, something unspoken, something understood. 

Slowly, carefully, you gave his hand one last squeeze before finally letting go. “I’ll see you tomorrow,” you murmured. Shadow Milk Cookie inclined his head. “Tomorrow,” he echoed. And with that, you turned away, leaving behind the quiet warmth of his presence, stepping back into the world where time moved forward once more.

You barely felt the ground beneath your feet as you walked, the world around you shimmering with a lightness you couldn't quite name. It filled your chest like air rushing into open lungs after being held under too long, like warmth spreading through cold fingers in the first touch of sunlight. Your steps were lighter, quicker not from urgency, but from something more untethered, something free.

 It was as if you were drifting, carried by an unseen current, floating weightless in the afterglow of something you didn’t dare put into words just yet. By the time you reached the dining halls, the buzz of students and the clinking of dishes barely registered. Your mind was still back there, wrapped in the remnants of golden eyes and the way his fingers had hesitated, just for a moment, before letting go. The moment your friends spotted you, Chai Latte Cookie’s eyes narrowed. “Oh,” she said, setting down her cup with an exaggerated slowness. “Oh, you’re glowing.” 

Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie turned in his seat, brows lifting as he took you in. “Well, well. Would you look at that.”

 Earl Grey Cookie, ever composed, barely looked up from his tea but there was the smallest twitch at the corner of his lips. “Fascinating,” he murmured, tilting his head just so. “Would you care to share with the class?” 

You blinked, suddenly hyper-aware of the way you must look practically floating, giddy with something obvious. Your face burned. “I-what? No. I’m just…I had a good day, that’s all.” 

Chai Latte Cookie leaned forward, eyes alight with knowing. “A good day?” 

Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie grinned. “Is that what we’re calling it?”

 You groaned, setting down your tray with a little too much force. “I swear-”

 “You swear you’ll tell us everything later?” Chai Latte Cookie interjected sweetly. You shot her a look, and she only beamed wider, elbow nudging yours. “No need to rush it, of course. But, you know, whenever you feel like talking-” 

Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie smirked. “Preferably now.” 

You buried your face in your hands. “I hate all of you.” 

Earl Grey Cookie sipped his tea, thoroughly unbothered. “And yet, here you are, choosing to eat with us.” You groaned again, but the warmth in your chest didn’t fade. It remained, steadfast, a quiet certainty. Because even as your friends teased, even as you struggled to find the words, even as you laughed and deflected and tried to fight the inevitable You knew. And he knew. And for now, that was enough. Chai Latte Cookie had been watching you since the moment you arrived, eyes sharp with amusement and something more patient, something waiting. She had given you space, let you have your moment of denial, let you pretend you could dodge the inevitable.

But then you sat down, tray forgotten, fingers twitching against the edge of the table, and she pounced. “So.” She leaned in, resting her chin on her palm, voice deceptively casual. “Are you gonna tell us, or do I have to start guessing?”

 Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie let out a low whistle, propping his elbows on the table. “Oh, this has to be good.” Earl Grey Cookie, ever composed, merely raised a brow over the rim of his teacup. “Well?” 

You swallowed, heart hammering in your chest. It wasn’t like you didn’t want to tell them. They were your friends, your closest friends. They had been there for everything since the beginning, from your struggles in class to your quiet, messy unraveling over the Sage of Truth. They deserved to know. Saying it aloud made it real. Still, the words were already clawing at your throat, desperate to be spoken, to exist. 

You inhaled sharply. “Okay,” you muttered. “Okay. But you have to let me say everything before you interrupt.”

Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie grinned. “No promises.” You glared at him before turning back to Chai Latte Cookie, whose expression had shifted into something softer, something that told you she knew just how much this meant. You exhaled.

 And then, like a floodgate breaking, you spilled everything. How you had gone to his office. How you had started with nonsense, falling into the rhythm of things, trying desperately to hold onto normalcy. How you had asked really asked what the two of you were. How he had somewhat named it. How you had asked if it would still be so, even when you were gone. How you had told him you wanted to go with him, that if you could find a way to do your research at the Spire, then no one neither of you would have to give anything up. How you had reached for him, afraid to let go.

Chai Latte Cookie sucked in a breath, eyes wide. “You kissed him?” 

You slammed your hands onto the table. “I panicked!”

 Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie howled with laughter, head thrown back. “You panicked? Oh, that’s rich.”

 Earl Grey Cookie, though visibly more entertained than usual, merely exhaled through his nose. “Fascinating,” he murmured. “And his response?” 

Your face burned. “He” You swallowed, fingers curling against the fabric of your sleeve. “He let me.” 

Chai Latte Cookie pressed a hand to her chest, gasping dramatically. “Oh, my stars.” Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie smirked. “And let me guess then you ran away.” 

You scowled. “I did not run away.”

 “Mm-hmm.” Chai Latte Cookie practically vibrated in her seat. “You kissed him.”

 “I know.” 

She let out a delighted squeal. “And he let you.” 

You groaned, burying your face in your hands. “Why are you making it sound worse?”

“Because it’s delicious.”

 Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie was still grinning like he had won some sort of grand prize. “So what now?” You hesitated. What now? What came after the truths had been spoken, after hands had lingered, after a kiss had stolen the last of your denials? What came after you had dared to hope? You swallowed. “I-I don’t know,” you admitted. “But I do know I want to be there. With him. At the Spire.” 

Earl Grey Cookie tilted his head slightly. “And what if you can’t?” You stiffened. Silence stretched between you, the weight of the question settling deep. You had thought about it. Of course, you had thought about it. “I have to try,” you said, voice quiet but sure. “Because if there’s a chance any chance then I don’t want to regret not taking it.”

 Chai Latte Cookie watched you for a long moment, her teasing gone, her expression unreadable. Then, slowly, she smiled. “Then we’ll help you.”

 Your breath hitched. “You?” She rolled her eyes. “Obviously.”

Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie stretched his arms behind his head. “Guess we’ve got some planning to do.”

Earl Grey Cookie smirked, tilting his cup toward you in a silent toast. “I do love a challenge.” You stared at them, something tight in your chest easing, warmth unfurling in its place. You weren’t alone in this. You never had been. With them at your side, you wouldn’t have to walk this path alone. You exhaled, pressing your hands to the table as if grounding yourself. “Come with me. To the Spire.” Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie nearly choked on his drink. “Wait, what?” Chai Latte Cookie blinked, her teacup hovering just before her lips. “You’re serious?”

“Of course, I’m serious,” you muttered, rubbing at the back of your neck. “I mean, think about it. We all have to pick a research lab for the fall semester, right? If we can apply to the Spire, then none of us would have to give anything up.” 

Earl Grey Cookie tilted his head, watching you carefully. “And this isn’t just about your academic prospects, is it?” You hesitated before shaking your head. “No. But that doesn’t make it any less of a good opportunity.” 

Chai Latte Cookie studied you, her gaze sharp, dissecting. Then, slowly, she grinned. “So,” she mused, “you’re not just trying to follow him. You’re making it so that we all move forward together.” 

Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie smiled cheekily. “Smart.” 

Earl Grey Cookie tapped a finger against the rim of his cup. “Ambitious.” Chai Latte Cookie hummed, considering. “And… if we say yes? What then?” Your fingers curled slightly against the table. “Then we do everything we can to make it happen.” Silence stretched between you, anticipation thick in the air. You swallowed, heart pounding, watching their faces, waiting for something, anything.

Then, after a long, thoughtful pause, Earl Grey Cookie exhaled, setting his cup down with a quiet clink. “I suppose,” he murmured, “we’d best start preparing our applications.” 

Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie snickered, nudging your arm. “Looks like you’re stuck with us.” 

Chai Latte Cookie beamed, reaching across the table to squeeze your hand. “You didn’t even have to ask,” she said softly. “Of course we’ll come with you.” Your breath hitched. And just like that, the weight on your chest, the fear of losing this, of losing them lightened, just a little. Of course Chai always had to ruin soft moments like this with her relentless teasing.

Chai Latte Cookie gasped, clutching your hand dramatically. “Oh, this is perfect. I knew something was up when you came floating into the dining hall looking like you’d just been kissed by the heavens”

 Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie smirked, leaning back in his chair. “More like kissed by the Sage of Truth.”

 Your face burned. “I-shut up!” 

Chai Latte Cookie ignored your protests entirely, practically vibrating with excitement. “No, no, no, this is huge! You finally, finally got past all the ‘what are we’ nonsense and just did something about it?”

 Earl Grey Cookie, ever composed, took a slow sip of his tea, watching with quiet amusement. “It seems they did,” he mused. You groaned, burying your face in your hands. “I don’t know why I told you all anything.” 

“Because you love us,” Chai Latte Cookie said smugly, wrapping her arm around your shoulders. “And because you knew we’d hype you up over this.” 

Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie leaned in, grinning. “So… how was it?” You groaned even louder. “Oh my god-” Chai Latte Cookie waggled her eyebrows. “Did he look absolutely ruined? Blushing, stunned, positively devastated by your boldness?” 

You peeked at her from between your fingers, warmth creeping up your neck. “…Maybe.” She gasped, shaking your shoulders. “I knew it!” Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie laughed, crossing his arms. “Hate to admit it, but she totally called it.” 

Chai Latte Cookie pressed a hand to her chest, looking entirely too pleased with herself. “Of course I did. I know romance when I see it, and this? This is the slow burn of the century.”

Earl Grey Cookie sighed, setting down his tea. “I am beginning to regret indulging this conversation.”

 “Oh, hush,” Chai Latte Cookie shot back. “This is monumental.” She turned back to you, eyes twinkling. “So? So?! Are you together now? Official? Have you talked about it?”

 Your stomach flipped. You hesitated, rubbing at your wrist. “I mean… not exactly.” The entire table groaned. “Are you kidding me?” Chai Latte Cookie threw her hands up. “You kissed and you still haven’t-” 

“It was a lot, okay?!” You waved your hands defensively. “I wasn’t exactly thinking about having the ‘define the relationship’ talk right after!”

 Earl Grey Cookie exhaled slowly, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I suppose that would have been too easy.”

 Chai Latte Cookie leaned in again, grinning. “Alright, fine. But do you plan on talking about it?” 

You swallowed. “Yeah,” you admitted. “I do.” She softened, nudging your arm. “Good.” Then her grin returned full force. “And until then, I’ll be gloating over the fact that I was right.” 

Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie snorted. “Oh, she’s never going to let this go.” Chai Latte Cookie winked. “Not in a million years.”

Dinner lingered longer than it usually did plates scraped clean, the flicker of golden lantern light above casting gentle shadows across the table, and your friends in rare form. Chai Latte Cookie hadn’t stopped grinning since you sat down, her excitement still pouring out in wild tangents and dreamy sighs. She was practically glowing. “Do you realize what this means?” she exclaimed, gesturing with both hands as if the stars themselves could be reshaped by your story. 

“He kissed you. The Sage of Truth or, sorry, the Fount of Knowledge kissed you. I could write poems about this!” Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie laughed so hard he nearly choked on his tea. “I give it a week before she starts putting sonnets under your dorm door.” 

Earl Grey Cookie, though more composed, had an unmistakable spark in his eye. His usual air of calm wasn’t gone, but tonight it had a certain crispness to it like the buzz of magic after a spell was cast. “You must admit,” he said, swirling the last of his tea in its cup, “it’s not every day we witness the immortal unshaken. He seems rather… enchanted.” 

You flushed, tucking your hands into your lap. “It’s not”

 “Oh, hush,” Chai Latte interrupted, leaning across the table. “You’re floating, and we’re living for it.”

Despite your embarrassment, a smile tugged at your lips. It was nice having them here, sharing in this strange, fragile new joy. The warmth in your chest refused to fade, and for once, you didn’t try to fight it. But still Before the table emptied and the chairs scraped back from the floor, before the last flicker of dessert vanished from its plate, you glanced up at them, voice quieter than before.

 “Hey,” you said, “before we all go…” The lightness dimmed slightly as your friends turned toward you, alert. You bit your lip. “Can you guys just… keep this private? Just for now?” 

Chai Latte Cookie’s brows furrowed. “Of course. Why?” You shifted in your seat, fingers curling slightly around your napkin. “Not that I don’t trust you. I do. But… it’s not just about me.” There was a pause brief but thoughtful. 

“You’re worried about him,” Earl Grey Cookie said. You nodded. “He’s respected. Revered, even. If word got out… people might talk. Twist things. I don’t want this to be something that hurts him.” 

Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie’s smirk softened into something gentler. “We’d never let that happen.” Chai Latte Cookie reached across the table again, this time taking your hand in both of hers. “You don’t have to explain. We get it. He’s… big. Important. But so are you. And if keeping this quiet keeps you both safe for now, we’ll guard it like it’s the last drop of honey-drizzled syrup on campus.” 

That got a small laugh out of you. Earl Grey Cookie gave a nod of solemn understanding. “No one will hear it from us.” 

“Not even a whisper,” Hazelnut Biscotti Cookie added, tapping his temple. “Scout’s honor.” 

You felt something loosen in your chest at their reassurances, your heart full to the brim with quiet gratitude. “Thank you,” you murmured. “Really.” Chai Latte Cookie squeezed your hand once more before letting go. “You’re welcome. But just so you know…” She leaned in again, conspiratorial. “I’m definitely still writing that poem.”

Chai latte waited behind the other two leaving without her, their goodnights still echoing faintly in your ears. You remained in your seat, half-lost in the warmth of the dining hall’s dim glow, fingers still absently tracing the rim of your cup. Chai Latte Cookie sat across from you, propping her chin in her palm as she watched you with that ever-present soft smile, the kind that looked effortless, practiced, but not fake. Just familiar. Just… her. 

You felt her gaze and blinked. “What?” She shrugged, her eyes drifting briefly to the window beside you where the twilight had begun to spill its blue haze across the courtyard. “Nothing,” she said lightly. “Just… you look really happy.”

Your lips twitched. “Do I?” 

“You do,” she said, leaning back in her seat with her arms crossed over her chest. “It’s different. It’s quiet, but it’s there.” You lowered your gaze for a moment, trying not to smile too hard. “Yeah, well… it’s been a weird day.” 

“The best kind,” Chai Latte said easily. Her voice was even, casual, no different than a dozen other moments you’d shared over the years. There was no waver, no sigh nothing that would tip you off to the way her thumb brushed across her sleeve under the table, grounding herself. Nothing that would betray the softness in her eyes wasn’t just for the moment, but for you.

She pushed her chair back with a quiet scrape. “C’mon,” she said, reaching for your hand and giving it a familiar tug. “Let’s get you back to your dorm before you end up floating away. You laughed softly, letting her pull you to your feet. “I’m not floating.”

 “You are,” she teased, looping her arm through yours as you walked. “It’s cute. You’re not allowed to deny it.”

 “Fine,” you said with a roll of your eyes. “But only because you’re being unusually agreeable tonight.”

She grinned at that, her gaze fixed forward, watching the way the torchlight flickered along the hallway walls. You didn’t notice the way she looked at you then, just for a moment. Didn’t notice the quiet exhale that wasn’t quite a sigh. Didn’t notice the softness in her steps, or the way her grip lingered around your arm just a little longer than needed. You were happy. And that was enough for her

A/N super tired to give an update...will be checking my inbox tomorrow I'm super tired...<3 pls be patient with me thank you

anyways...

Remember to follow and reblog for more bangers 😎😎😎🔥🔥🔥🔥

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[cerisereids]

𝗜’𝗹𝗹 𝗕𝗲 𝗪𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗬𝗼𝘂 (𝗘𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗕𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗵 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗧𝗮𝗸𝗲)- 𝗦.𝗥.

Pairing- Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader

W/C- 6.5k (crazy shit)

Summary- You and Spencer have never gotten along. Yet, you can’t seem to ever take your eyes off each other.

Contains- 18+ MDNI, not super smutty but there is a sex scene (not super detailed) canon typical violence, enemies to lovers, Spencer losing all brain cells over a pretty girl, bitchy!Spencer, reader and Spencer are held captive by unsub, dramatic love confessions, kissing, some icky misogyny directed at reader from unsub but it's quite brief, guns, unsub death, honestly this reads a lot like a regular cm episode but with Spencer being down bad, this low-key turned into smut when I didn't plan on it but c'est la vie

A/N: I can’t find the OP of the divider but it is not mine!! This is a little proofread but not a lot of proofread, I am also thinking about making a part 2 w some actual smutty smut so lmk if you guys like this!

An itch of irritation crawls up your spine, a deep ache settling in your skull as you sit in the BAU conference room. You massage your temples as a rapid, grating voice nestles its way into your ears.

“The fact that this unsub feels comfortable targeted a densely populated area such as D.C. tells us he’s either impulsive or incredibly bold,” he remarks, arms crossed, a pensive look on his face as he studies the map in front of him.

Despite your annoyance, you keep your eyes trained on the profiler as he rattles on. Your eyes narrow just slightly, You’re seated directly across the table from him, and you watch the way he gets lost in the information, almost like it’s in control of him as he frantically circles different locations on the map. Spencer Reid speaks with his entire body, he always has, ever since you started at the BAU one year prior.

“Maybe it’s a comfort zone,” he stands back, leaning his weight on one leg. Your eyes drift down his lanky frame for the briefest moment, lingering on his popped hip. They furiously snap back up to his face once he starts speaking again, cheeks heating up.

“The lines of longitude and latitude at each murder sight are equivalent to the central area of the city,” he mumbles.

“Okay, so we need to know what’s there. Something clearly happened to our unsub that has made him choose these locations,” you cross your arms over your chest, “you really think our unsub measured all of the crime scenes on a map? That shows an incredible amount of organization that I don’t think he has.”

Your tone is a bit defensive, skeptical of his work. To you, profiling is a subjective art. Your best profiling comes from understanding emotions, trauma. Spencer works completely different.

While you do have to recognize his intelligence, the strict logic in which he operates in this job is not something you entirely agree with. He spouts rapid fire facts nearly robotically, like he’s reading straight from a textbook. It drives you batty.

You’re not typically someone who’s thrown off by a different approach. Normally, you accept and encourage a fresh set of eyes while you work. If it wasn’t for what Spencer said your first week…

Plus, you had an early acceptance to Harvard before you decided to go to the academy. His intelligence doesn’t impress you that much.

“Yes, as a matter of fact I do. He’s very clearly organized, it fits the profile,” he states, his irritated gaze pointed directly at you.

You stare back brazenly, in a silent competition with the man across from you.

“I’m really just unsure how that helps us right now when central D.C. is so big. How are we going to narrow down his tie to the city?” His eyes narrow to slits at your question.

“She’s got a point,” Hotch succinctly breaks through the tension, and you’re reminded that you’re in a room with the entire team. “Give the information you have to Garcia, have her narrow it down. Afterwards, I want you and Prentiss on victimology in the bullpen,” he says.

You puff your chest slightly, sliding out from your chair to get closer to the evidence board. You feel his eyes burning a hole into your back before he huffs an irritated sigh, exiting the conference room with a harsh slam of the door. You keep your gaze on him through the window as he walks to Penelope’s.

Spencer grumbles under his breath the whole way down to Penelope. Head down, brows furrowed, he barges in there with the map. Without so much as a hello, he posts it on her wall.

“Well, hello to you too, Doctor!” She chastises him as he keeps his gaze on the map, like she’s not even there.

He knows it’s mean, that she deserves more respect than that, his brain is just unable to process anything other than her. She makes him want to explode.

“Sorry,” he grumbles, continuing his previous work on the map.

“Spence, you gotta stop letting her get under your skin like that,” he hears the pity in her voice, which only makes his blood boil hotter.

“Nobody’s under my skin, I’m trying to solve the case,” he’s speaking too quickly, like that’s even possible for him.

“Yeah, okay,” she mumbles sarcastically. She begins picking up what he’s doing on the map, entering coordinates in her computer as he works.

“She just-” his pen clatters to her desk, a knowing smile growing on Penelope’s face as she types. He ignores it. “She has to question everything I do! If she doesn’t trust me, why are we on the same team together. You know?” He huffs a heavy breath.

Penelope turns to him, “Spencer, she trusts you. Hotch wouldn’t have either of you on the team if she didn’t. Just because she has a different approach doesn’t mean she’s undermining you.”

He rolls his eyes, he knows she’s just trying to help. The irritation crawling under his sweater, seeping into his skin, is suffocating. He tugs on his collar so he can breathe.

“Then why does everything she say feel like an attack?” He asks, scratching the back of his head.

“Have you ever thought that maybe you want to impress her?” Penelope asks, and it knocks the wind out of him. “I mean, she’s like, the only person in the world who isn’t totally blown away by your incredible mind. Probably because she’s so smart herself,” she remarks under her breath. He rolls his eyes at that. “Regardless, you want her to agree with you, right? You might just want to impress her.”

Spencer’s face heats up as she raises her brow at him. His gaze immediately drops to his shoes, fidgeting awkwardly before turning back to his map.

“We need to get back to work,” he mutters.

-

To Spencer’s dismay, she stands in his exact line of sight as he’s with Emily, working on victimology. He stands at her desk, and he really should be listening to what Emily is saying. Instead, he has a laser focus on her.

She’s leaning over the conference room table, her back to the window. There’s a slight arch in her back as she pops her hip out. The silky fabric of her black pencil skirt clings to her and Spencer almost forgets why he’s so mad at her all the time.

Emily follows his line of sight and he rolls his eyes, as if she’s the one being ridiculous. The deepest parts of him know it’s not fair, but he’s never done well with his feelings on display. He feels vulnerable, like a raw nerve.

He feels exposed at the low chuckle escaping Emily’s lips. His gaze shoots towards the case file, now in an iron grip in his hands, clearing the awkwardness that has crept up his throat.

“I’m not sure who either of you think you’re fooling,” she nonchalantly mumbles under her breath, viewing her own copy of the case file.

“I’m sorry?” He snaps, his eyes squeezing shut in a long blink, as if he’s trying to unsee her.

“Y’know, if you just talked to her, really got to the bottom of your disagreements, maybe you’d see that you two are a lot more alike than you think,” she raises her brow at him, and it feels as if his heart’s been slashed open, bleeding on display for everyone to see. He always feels this way when someone shines a light on his vulnerability, his natural instinct to run from it. If it’s not there, then he can’t get hurt.

“I’m just trying to catch a killer,” he squeaks, his high pitched voice giving him away almost immediately. Emily playfully rolls her eyes and chuckles once more. His heart rate picks up, cheeks heating to an alarming degree.

The door of the conference opens, then. As if the universe is playing a cruel, practical joke on him, the click of her heels get closer and closer, until her perfume has invaded his senses.

“So, we figured out that our unsub was recently released from a mental institution in the greater D.C. area. Garcia is working on which one, but is there anything in the victimology that points toward abandonment issues? Particularly from a motherly figure?” She rattles off, the sound of her voice like a knife to the chest. It’s sharp, infiltrating every piece of him, stripping him of his defenses even further.

He stares at her, unabashedly. His eyes trail from her pink button up, sleekly tucked into that godforsaken skirt. He studies her as if it’s the first time he’s seen her, memorizing the ways her curves ebb and flow around the fabric.

His heart picks up when she looks back, but he doesn’t look away. Their eye contact is tense, as always. There’s a fire in her eyes that’s always there when they’re in the middle of a case. Her passion burns through, heating him all over.

“I think our unsub is too organized for him to be abandoned,” he replies, “typically when we see people traumatized by abandonment are reckless, but he’s taken the time to clean up after himself, even starting the dishwasher and laundry machine in his victims’ homes.”

“You still think he’s organized?” she asks right back, not missing a beat.

“He loaded the dishwasher and the laundry machine, that’s not organized to you?” His skin crawls as he answers, the usual thrill of her challenge thrumming through him.

“But if you look at these pictures…” she trails, grabbing crime scene photos of the laundry and open dishwasher from her file, “this is not the doing of an organized person. The plates are mixed with cups, there’s bowls where the silverware would be. It’s very evident he just shoved everything in there. Same thing with the laundry, we have socks with jeans. It doesn’t make sense.”

“Maybe it’s a mix of both,” Emily suggests, “a sort of compensating? He was abandoned by his mother so now he’s completing what could be seen as motherly duties.”

“I could definitely see that,” the voice to his right mutters, and he watches as she chews the tip of her pen in concentration.

“We don’t normally see that in male serial killers…” he trails off, trying his best to appear nonchalant as he flips through the case file. The one he’s already memorized front to back.

“There’s a first time for everything,” she says, the slight uptick in her tone barely there, but he catches it. He always does, a telltale sign that he’s gotten under her skin. He seems to live there these days.

He takes her in again, the glint of irritation in her eyes. A hand on her hip, the other resting on a chair near Emily’s desk. Her stance is closed off, shutting him out. Even still, he sees the way her eyes drift toward his direction. Her gaze is facing the floor, but he can tell his shoes are in her line of sight, and a strange surge of pride rushes through his chest. He can’t repress the need for her to notice him, in any capacity.

You feel his eyes the second they hit you. It’s like a sixth sense, knowing exactly when he finds you. It’s become natural, almost instinctual, for his eyes to be on you. You’re no better, though, mirroring him as you watch each other.

He’s thin, sinking into his button up, a pair of slacks hanging low on his hips. You catch the way it pulls taut where it meets his belted waist, the slightest bit of skin peeking through at his hip.

Your heart races at the sight, even more so when your eyes snap back up to his, and you know he caught you. Your body heats all over, every bit of you on fire as his gaze pierces you. The heat spreads internally, acid bubbling in your stomach. It feels as if he sees right through you, looking into the deepest parts.

You shake your head, shedding the feeling of him like a snake. “What have you guys found?” You ask, doing your best to focus on the victimology.

“We think he’s finding these women from their social media accounts. He’s targeting women who post emotionally. The last few posts from each victim were about some hardship or another. Maybe there was a woman in his life who made her emotions his burden,” Emily suggests, and you cut your gaze to her, shaking Spencer out of your system.

Then, you hear it. It’s small. Under his breath. It infuriates you.

“Wonder what that’s like.”

Something inside you snaps, like a rubber band that’s been pulled too tight. It ricochets off your heart, piercing your stomach until you lose control over your response.

“I’m sorry, what is your problem?” It takes all the energy you have left to not absolutely screech. Your snappy tone still calls the attention of the people around you. You feel eyes on the two of you as you pierce him with a cruel gaze. You no longer have the capacity to care.

“My problem?” He retorts, knowing full well what she is talking about.

“You have been at odds with me this entire case. Actually, since I joined the bureau,” You scoff, your insides boiling over. All the frustration of bickering with Spencer for the past three years has finally come to a head. “If you don’t trust me if you don’t like what I have to say, then you need to be a man and do something about it,” the words drip off your tongue like acid.

“Like what?” He bites back, squaring his shoulders toward you, “take it to Hotch? You and I both know where that would get us. Why is it just on me? Because you’re never wrong, right? Our BAU princess is always correct-”

“Enough.”

Hotch’s stern tone cuts through the sarcasm falling from Spencer, and the two of you straighten up in record time.

“The rest of the team is going into the field to finish this case. You two are on paperwork duty until we get back. That’s an order,” he turns to collect the rest of the team, you and Spencer mirroring each other’s shock as you watch them go.

You deflate. The smack of your file hitting Emily’s desk is the only audible sound as you grab a box, hauling it to the conference room. Spencer follows suit, and the two of you begin to work in tense, angry silence.

You study him as he works, long, deft fingers moving in a rapid speed that nearly hypnotizes you. You catch his brown eyes, softer now, still focused as they flit through the endless pile of papers. You massage your heart, as if it’d ease the ever growing ache there.

“Do you remember this case?” Spencer asks softly, and you can’t recall a time he’s spoken to you in such a tone. It makes your heart flutter in a way that scares you, the giddiness warming your skin. You roll your shoulders, hoping it’d release the tension built up in your neck.

You lean a bit towards Spencer, glancing at the file that reads, ‘Plymouth Family.’ You can’t help the smile that spreads your lips, your cheeks bunching up around your eyes.

“Family of four, two girls, all kidnapped, all recovered safely,” you recite softly. You touch the pictures of the young girls, your eyes glassing over. “Four and six…” you whisper shakily, “they were just babies.”

You remember the way they clung to you when you found them in the shed they were kept in. They were dirty, smelly, and shaking. Their arms and legs were wrapped tight around you as you carried them to the medic. You sat with them the whole time the team looked for their parents. You were there when they woke up in the hospital.

“You were amazing on this case,” Spencer says. You feel the warm skin of his arm against yours, and you realize how close you’ve gotten. “You were empathetic, smart…” he trails off, eyes lifting to your face.

Your eyes dart up to meet his. “Thank you,” you mutter softly, your eyes scanning the length of his face.

“You’re welcome,” he replies in the same tone.

“Spencer,” you start, and he knows what you’re going to say before you go any further. His breath hitches, and you continue anyway.

“How did we get here?” You ask, shaking your head incredulously, “We’re two of the smartest minds on the team and we’re stuck here on paperwork duty.”

“I would argue it’s our inability to work together without high levels of conflict,” he responds, sarcasm lacing his tone.

“Yeah, well, you made that bed, now we both have to lie in it, I guess,” you mutter under your breath.

“I’m sorry, how is that so?” He asks.

“Are you serious?” You respond, your blood starting to race through your veins. His brows raise, prompting you to continue. “Do you not remember one of our first conversations after I joined the bureau?”

His brows furrow in confusion. You keep going.

“We were in St. Louis. We were working on the case with that Jack the Ripper copycat. I was so focused on analyzing the unsub’s background, digging into everything I could. You told me that if I value emotion over logic I’m going to get tunnel vision. That I wouldn’t last long if I let myself stray from the facts.” The words still sting, all these years later. You avoid looking at him, turning your back to him so he can’t look at you either.

“We’ve been like this for three years because I told you that you value emotion over logic? I thought that was a known fact,” he states plainly, as he always does when he thinks something is obvious.

“We’ve been like this for three years because you were someone I looked up to. When I was scouted for the unit by Gideon, a big reason why I agreed to join was because I’d get to work with you. The great Dr. Spencer Reid. I read about you, when I was at Harvard. I was amazed. A little jealous, too, but amazed all the same. When you said that, it-it was belittling. Like you didn’t believe in my ability to do the job. I spent everyday since trying to prove you wrong,” you rattle off in one long breath.

Spencer is still as a statue, watching you intently. His eyes are blown wide, his mouth slightly parted.

“I’m sorry,” he mutters lowly. “I’ve always used logic. It’s gotten me where I am. You came in here with a completely different approach, and it worked. Really well. It threw me off, it intimidated me…” he trails off, his cheeks tinting red as his chin drops to his chest.

“Intimidated? By me?” You saunter closer to him, a wicked grin on your face. You plop down on the chair across from him, knees barely knocking.

Spencer’s heart beats faster as she leans closer to him, her knees now slotted between his. The contact makes him dizzy.

The beep of his cell phone jolts him away from her. Spencer fumbles with his phone for a minute, before opening it with a shaky, “Yes, Penelope?”

You can hear her screech over the phone. “You and Miss BAU Princess need to turn on the news. Now.”

His cheeks heat at the nickname. He chokes on his own breath, exhaling sharply before grabbing the remote to the big screen in the conference room.

What he sees makes his stomach drop.

Multiple black SUVs, driving at top speed on the tail of a dirty, beat up grey sedan.

At first, in the pent up anticipation of the moment, he hardly registered her grabbing his hand. Once he did, the feeling of her branded his skin. A white hot sensation that spreads to the tips of his toes all the way to the top of his head. He wraps his fingers around hers and squeezes.

He takes a glance at her, and he wishes he hadn’t. His heart aches at the look of sheer panic on her face. Her furrowed brows, glassy eyes, and parted lips squeeze at his heart from all sides. He pulls her into him, allowing her to take refuge in his chest.

It’s not long after that he hears it, the hairs on the back of his neck standing up. It’s the creak of the door. The click of a loaded gun. She must feel his rigidity, because she lifts her head up to look him in the eye.

“What?” She questions, lifting her head from his chest. She feels it too, he can tell. The lingering sense that something’s not right.

“Someone’s here,” he mutters, “stay here,” he moves to arm himself. It’s muscle memory at this point, his body moving of his own accord.

He feels the scoff she emanates deep within him. A small smile forces its way on his lips at the sound.

“Yeah right,” she replies. He feels her behind him, her own gun peeking through his peripheral.

He’s flooded with adrenaline, his blood thrumming in his veins. He moves slowly, tactical steps as he opens the conference room door. He’s met with a sharp pain cracking down on his head, rendering him unconscious.

Your hands are bound behind your back, legs tied together. Your wrists and ankles chafe raw at your resistance. You bite down on the tape plastered over your mouth, desperate to claw your way out. Your heart races, adrenaline pumping through your veins as you try and maneuver through the conference room without being seen.

After Spencer was knocked unconscious, he was dragged out of the conference room. You’re not sure where he is, and the thought renders you dizzy. You attempt to peek out of the window, the bullpen now completely cleared, save for the agents that were caught in the crossfire.

You flinch at the sound of loud, hard footsteps nearing the door. Scrambling back into place, you avoid eye contact as the strange man drags an unconscious Spencer toward you. He props him up next to you, his chin hitting his chest.

Your eyes glass over as you take in the bruise coloring his right eye a deep blue. The split on his pouting, bloody lip is crusting over.

A pair of cold fingers dip under your chin, forcing your head up to look this man in the eye. His hard stare burns into you, but before he can do anything, his phone begins ringing.

“Saved by the bell…” a gruff voice spits out, letting go of your face with a shove.

Your eyes squeeze shut, bracing for contact on the wall behind you. The blow stings for a moment, but you’re able to shake it off when Spencer starts to stir next to you. Your breath hitches as he grumbles, his eyes barely opening.

“Spencer,” you whisper, “what is going on?”

“It looks like a team,” he considers, maneuvering his body to sit up further.

"Where were you?" you hissed back, worry lacing every feature of your face.

"Hotch's office," he grumbles, "I kept...I kept drifting in and out of consciousness. But I spoke to him. He's fixated on the two of us, but he wanted a lot of information about you."

He adjusts, cracking his neck from where it rests against the wall. "Hotch is going to have to hire carpet cleaners when they get back," sarcasm laces his tone, and you can't help but roll your eyes.

"You just got beat within an inch of your life, and you're making jokes?" you scoff affectionately.

"How could you tell?" his voice shifts then, seriousness lacing his tone suddenly.

"How could I tell that you got hit?" you repeat, eyes scanning over his face and body. "You're bruised in multiple spots, a bloody lip, a black eye forming..."

"You're always looking at me. You think I've never noticed?" he mutters, and it steals the breath from your lungs.

"You're always looking at me!" you hiss, no choice but to deflect.

"I know."

It's the last thing that's said before the door opens again. You sit straight up, your back pressed against the wall as the man shuffles in. You immediately clock the gun in his hand, pointed directly at Spencer.

He stalks over to you, gun still pointed in Spencer's direction. His dry, cracked finger hooks under your chin, pulling your head up to face his.

"Do you want to know what he told me in there?" his head jerks back, gesturing towards Hotch's office. He stands up, moving towards Spencer again. "Wanna know what your pathetic, disgusting, deplorable coworker told me when you weren't here?" Each insult is matched with swift kicks to Spencer's stomach and chest. He groans, rolling on his back now as he tries not to succumb to the pain.

Your eyes don't leave him. You're not sure you could pull your gaze away if you tried. You don't have much of a choice, though, as the man yanks your head back to look at him.

"He told me..." the gun comes up under your chin now, holding your head in place once again, "that he has a little crush on you. Isn't that just pitiful?" he laughs sarcastically, shaking his head.

You study the man, recalling all the knowledge you gained about him over the course of this case. He's insecure, probably impotent. He hunts women because he could never get them any other way.

"Guys like us..." he yanks Spencer to sit up by his collar, "we don't get girls like that." He's nearly spitting in Spencer's face, and you know he's slowly dying inside.

"Spencer..." you breathe out, "is it true?" You do your best to appear completely turned off, though you know you never could be. Your brows furrow in disgust as your lips curl downward.

"See, look at her," he's got Spencer's hair in an iron grip, forcing you two to look at each other. "She's disgusted, she doesn't want you. How could you be so stupid?"

"I just got caught up in it," the words spill out of Spencer's mouth, "we spend so much time together, and you're so pretty, so witty, so smart. I just couldn't help but fall in love with you."

Those words knock the air right out of your chest. A crush is one thing, but in love? You shiver, his words unzipping down your spine.

"You see that?" he growls, yanking Spencer's hair even harder, "she doesn't want you."

"He's right," Spencer flinches at your words, and you continue despite the hurt in your heart, "I don't want you, Spencer. Because I want you."

You turn your gaze to the unsub, staring him straight in the eye.

"I just can't resist you. The way you've dominated us..." you breathe out a huffy laugh, "it's undoubtedly one of the most attractive things I have ever seen. Way more attractive than anything he has ever done," you nod towards Spencer as seduction laces each word, though it tastes like poison on your tongue.

You see Spencer in your peripheral. You can barely make out the look in his eye, but you swear you see the faintest tint of insecurity lacing his gaze. The fear that maybe you mean it. Your heart clutches at the thought, and you note to do something about that later.

He lets Spencer go, his attention is now fully on you. He saunters closer, a hand reaching for your tied up ankle. His hands feel like sandpaper on your skin, gritty and unwanted.

"You really think so?" he whispers, his grip now shifting to your bicep. "Then prove it. Come with me."

He yanks you up, helping you move with your tied up limbs. You glance at Spencer briefly before you're led out of the conference room into the bullpen.

It's not long before a gunshot rings out, and you prepare for the blow. You fall to the floor, though, suddenly unsupported by the man propping you up. You turn from your spot on the ground to find Spencer wielding his gun from the conference room, miraculously unbound.

"I had him!" you scoff, rolling your eyes as Spencer undoes your hands and ankles.

"He told me what he wanted you for when he had me in Hotch's office. Believe me, I did you a favor," his brows furrow in what looks like frustration, possessiveness, as he continues to free you from your bounds.

A shiver runs through you again, shaking the disgust at the thought. You let it pass, though, he's dead. He can't hurt you anymore. Once you're free, you fall back into his chest, letting him hold you from behind. Tears slip through your closed eyes as all of the emotions of the past two hours course through every part of your body.

Spencer tightens his hold around you, soothingly rubbing his large palms up and down. Your hand reaches up to the back of his scalp, gently massaging the spot where the man had pulled.

"Are you okay?" you whisper, your faces inches from each other.

"Better now," he replies.

"Me too," you smile.

Before you can manage anything else, Spencer's mouth is on yours. It's a small kiss at first, tentative, unsure. It deepens when you turn to face him, Spencer now resting on his knees. He opens his mouth further as the kiss envelops you both. He's desperate, as if he's trying to swallow you whole. The kiss is all consuming, the corners of your brain turning fuzzy as you let yourself fall further into his arms.

"Anyone wanna tell me why you two are making out next to our dead unsub?" you and Spencer break apart at the intruding voice, like two teenagers caught in bed.

It's just Derek, thankfully. A playful, supportive brow is cocked in Spencer's direction as the poor guy next to you flushes a shade of red you didn't think existed.

"I'm not against it," he says, moving to help you off the floor, "just maybe find a better setting next time."

Your face is on fire, probably just as bad as Spencer's. You see him move out of the corner of your eye, and you grab his hand. You run your thumb over the chafing on his wrist, your heart clutching when he hisses at the sensation.

"Hey, Spence?" you mumble, exhaling a shaky breath as your eyes lock on his red wrist.

"Yeah?" he mutters back, matching your intensity.

"How did you get out of those knots? I tried the whole time he had you, they wouldn't budge." You look up at him now, his big eyes tightening at the edges as a small smile spreads across his lips.

"It was a classic prusik knot. I just had to reverse it and I was out," he states like it's the simplest thing in the world.

"Right. Of course you did," you smile, no teasing in your words, just true affection. Maybe a little bit of shock as well. His mind always has amazed you, even when you were too proud to say it.

You give his hand a squeeze before separating to be checked out by the medics. The rest of your team engulfs the two of you with worried looks and comforting words. As always, you find Spencer in the chaos. As always, he's already looking at you by the time your eyes find him.

Spencer sits on the edge of his couch, a bag of frozen peas resting on his black eye. It never gets easier, the fear and adrenaline of being taken by a psychopath. No matter how hard he tries, he still has to fight that feeling at the end of each day. The feeling that, no matter how hard he tries, how good of a profiler he is, it'll never take away the visceral fear of having your life in someone else's hands.

A knock on his door snaps him out of his spiral, and he silently thanks whoever is here at 8:47 p.m. on a Tuesday. He swings open the door to find the last person he expected to see. Her. She's here, to see him, wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt. Her hair is up, not an ounce of makeup on her face. She's perfect.

"I couldn't sleep," she whispers, and he's now registering the sleep mask that must've never left her forehead the whole way here. As his eyes trail down the rest of her frame, he takes into account the stuffed animal nestled in her right elbow, the fuzzy slippers on her feet.

"Me either," he responds, unable to help the smallest uptick of his lips at the sight of her. She looks so soft, and he has to fight the urge to reach out and grab her. He would never let go.

"Can I come in?" she asks, her eyes wide, and he's not religious, but God. How is he supposed to say no?

He nods simply, moving his body out of the way so she can enter his apartment. She looks around, taking in the intricate rug, the bookshelves lined from floor to ceiling. A bolt of self consciousness strikes him. The fear of her not liking what she sees runs through him for the briefest moment. The fear is gone, though, when she turns to him with a huge smile on her face.

"It's just as I assumed it would be."

He smiles at that, his tummy turning over her imagining what his apartment looks like, over her thinking about him that much in general.

"Are you oka-" He begins his question, but she barrels right through him.

"Did you mean what you said earlier?" It bursts out of her, as though she couldn't control it. He knows exactly what she means, and she knows he knows. He plays dumb anyway.

"Which part?" he croaks. She rolls her eyes, though there's no malice in it.

"When you said you were in love with me. Did you mean it?" Her honesty burns right through him, exposing all of him to her without even trying.

"Yes," he whispers, "I just thought you never liked me. I thought it'd be easier to pretend I didn't like you too."

She smiles, a bit self-deprecating, a lot of adoration. "We need to get better at talking to each other," she remarks. She saunters closer to him, wrapping her arms around his waist.

Her touch makes him feel like he's on fire, his blood thrumming through his veins right to his heart. It feels like it's burning to a crisp, yet he never wants her to let go.

"I love you, too, Spencer. I think I have since before I even knew you. I was so hurt when you made that comment all those months ago. I was more naive then, took things too personally. I thought that maybe if I just repressed the feelings, they would go away," she says, and his heart grows three sizes at the confession. "Of course I didn't mean what I said, either, I hope you know that."

He nods, feeling even more on display. How could she tell he took that to heart?

"Why do you think I always look at you?" she continues, "I couldn't ever take my eyes off you, even if I was paid to. You're too beautiful."

He blushes something fierce at that. Beautiful is a new one. He's been called a lot of things, nerdy, annoying, genius. But never beautiful. It burns him hotter, a white flash of light spreading through his entire body.

"You're beautiful," he replies, his arms finally coming up to pull her closer, his forehead resting against hers.

"You really think so?" she teases, a cheeky smile spreading her lips.

He nods, "Prettiest woman I've ever seen," it's a whisper, and it's true. No one has ever taken the wind from his sails the way she does.

"Can you kiss me again?" she breathes against his lips, desperation punching through each word.

He grabs her then, his hands coming up to cradle the back of her head as they desperately chase each other's lips. She plants short, staccato kisses all over him. She starts with his lips, kissing him once, twice, three times. She moves to his face, then, trailing her lips and tongue along his jaw, biting lightly behind his ear.

He feels her smile at the noise he emits, a whiny breath of air that would leave him embarrassed with anyone else. With her, though, with the way she's worshiping him, it doesn't even cross his mind.

He pulls her head back as she reaches his cheeks, feeling sorry for making her do all the work. He smashes his lips back into hers, lifting her legs so he can move her to his bed.

She cuddles into the soft mattress the second she's there, her eyes piercing his. He watches the way her gaze rakes down his body, a boost of confidence pumping him up. He takes his shirt off, a swift movement that surprises the both of you.

"Is this okay?" he whispers as he crawls on top of her, settling his long legs between her spread ones.

She nods sweetly, "Of course."

His heart stutters at that. Of course. Those words have the power to knock him off his feet. Her hands drift up to his hips, lightly squeezing the tiny bit of excess body fat there. He kisses her cheek. She rakes her hands up and down his back, nails scratching ever so slightly. He shivers.

It's not long until they're completely tangled in each other, breathy moans escaping her lips as he moves in and out of her. He wants to drink up every noise she makes, every low groan and high pitched whine that escapes her the most enticing elixir.

When they're finished, he's in a state of content and peace that he had never previously imagined possible. Peace and tranquility floats through the room as they take turns glancing at each other. Every time their eyes lock, they burst out giggling like children.

She's glued to him, whining high and long whenever he tries to move. She'd nearly strangled him with her grip when he went to get her a towel. She only relented when he- very thoughtfully, he might add- educated her on the risks of UTIs after sex.

They're laying in a light, airy silence now. One that drowns out the horrors of the day. He recounts the events of the past year, everything from meeting her to where they are now. His mind plays it over like a VCR tape stuck on rewind. He's desperate to find any evidence of her feelings before today, his mind whirring nonstop.

When she shifts in his arms, though, her heavy breathing indicating a deep sleep, it suddenly doesn't matter. He's here now, with the prettiest woman he's ever seen. He's so grateful he never took his eyes off of her.