#-so chewy and yummy to me

[steakout-05]

ok does anyone else think the hair in splatoon looks super chewy and yummy or is it just my 'tism. like. real seafood looks great and all but splatoon hair??? that shit looks scrumptious. if i met an inkling or an octoling irl i think the first thing i'd do is immediately try to eat their hair because holy shit it looks so CHEWY!!! they will be BALD because i EATED ALL THEIR HAIR!!!

[purgatory2]

MY SENSORY ISSUES ARE SO ANNOYING

[999moreyears]

ATE MOCHI ICE CREAM 4 THE 1ST TIME!! it was Okay (ice cream inside was YUMMERSS.. the Mochi Not So much...) I think I need 2 have mochi on its own..

[mars-ipan]

man my animation teacher is so cool. she’s such a chill person and i trust her a whole lot :)

[lovphobic]

so im making cookies for my moms coworker again. the one i had to stay up to rush the previous batch for. and i told her once again that it kills me that he is having me a stranger make cookies for his dad and she was like well hes a guy he doesnt know how to bake........... idk how i kept the evil feminist dyke from completely jumping out in that walmart but all i said was ok and? its a skill that anyone can and should learn

[absolutebl]

Best & Worst BLs of 2023

My Top 15 BLs of 2023 are (in order)

1 Our Dating Sim

Korea Viki

Nerds in love, deadlines, gaming, teasing, pining tiny idiots, casual affection, linguistic oops, ADORABLE. If you haven't watched this, it's a must. A perfect short form KBL, an office set reunion romance featuring geeks that really suits 8 eps with no fluff and no chaff. Just comforting and yummy.

I adored every aspect from the casting to the pristinely simple premise to the quietly smooth execution. Sure it’s low stakes, but that makes it high domesticity and extremely warm and gentle. This is a fuzzy blanket of a story - a cozy BL. It lives in my rewatch pile and you know what’s best about it? Every single episode is in that pile. There’s no skipping with this one, it might be good natured and calmly sweet but it’s tight and the pacing is excellent.

Also recieves my 2023 award for best giggle.

2 I Cannot Reach You

AKA I Can't Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai

Japan Netflix

This classic friends-to-lovers BL is everything Japan does best. Angsty. Emo. Aching. Driven by real thirst. Yamato is deeply in love with his childhood bestie, Kakeru, and has been for ages, unable to hide his ungainly damaging high school need. He wants Kakeru in every way possible and it oozes off of the screen.

Kakeru is silly and a little simple, but not frenetic or overly camp about it. He is earnest, and genuinely wants to keep Yamato in his life which means giving a romance (and gayness) a fair chance. We watch him realize his affection and what form it can take in a truly authentic way.

This show was impossibly kind to both of its lead characters and I felt almost honored that I got to watch something so lovely and rare play out on my screen.

Also wins the best thirst award.

These were the 2 BLs that got 10/10 from me in 2023. The rest of these got 9/10 from me.

3 My School President

Thailand YouTube

GMMTV gave us a classic high school set Thai BL with tropes like messy boys singing their feelings that made this one Love Sick for the modern age with all the gentle sweetness and pining ache, but none of the dated damaging tropes or issues. Who let my BL be this wholesome and funny? My favourite GMMTV BL offering to date. And yes, I've watched them ALL.

Received the Namgoong award for best wingman 2023.

4 I Feel You Linger in the Air

Thailand grey

IFYLITA is an exquisite BL, from filming techniques to narrative framework. Steeped in history and family drama this is an elegant and classy BL. The main couple (both as a pair and individuals) were excellent, particularly Bright (Yai) whose eye-work acting style is a personal favorite of mine. It's a marker of how great it was that it's so high on my list despite the ending which was very much not what I wanted.

Additional accolade, sexiest moment of 2023 - (the oil scene).

You could try to fight me, but you'll have no grip.

5 Kiseki: Dear to Me

Taiwan Gaga & Viki

The plot is totally ridiculous and slightly unhinged. There’s a gum-ball machine of cameos, elder gay rep, great chemistry from all pairs (everyone is queer), and a KILLER side couple. It involves all the tropes under a very offhand framework of gay mafia gangs + food = love. As a result Kiseki is a poster child for Taiwanese BL, and I happen to love Taiwanese BL. Bonus? They also managed to END IT WELL, which we cannot expect from Taiwan.

Best side couple 2023!

(thank goodness Taiwan made this list!)

6 Jun and Jun

Korea Viki

A delightful office romance about an ex-idol who joins cubical life only to find his new boss is his first love. With a snappy (sometimes even raunchy) script, enjoyable sides, a pretty as peaches cast, and descent chemistry this show made up for in style what it lacked in substance. I like fluff. I loved this. I smiled every moment I was watching.

Best flirting 2023.

AKA "the tongue knows" award

7 The Eighth Sense

Korea Viki

This one is a bit chewy and sticky and less perfect than most KBLs. It’s got a bit of an age gap, country boy/city boy, stellar acting, complex characters, and leads with great chemistry and tension. This isn’t in the KBL bubble, there’s sharp edges and lots of triggers. For a BL the darkness of the content left me feeling unsettled (which is the only reason it didn't get a perfect score) but it has a glorious ending and that counts for a lot.

2023's most likely to appeal to non-BL watchers.

8 Unintentional Love Story

Korea iQIYI

The lead, Gongchan (maknae of B1A4) is a fucking GIFT, who carried this show. He was luminous with extraordinarily expressive eyes, which he used to carry a killer plot and challenging role. Forced into a totally understandable betrayal, falling in love despite himself, put into a corner he can't get out of, the AGONY, the eyes EMOTING at us in PAIN. Driven by external conflict, social tension and pressure this story seems simple but it's actually refined and quite complex. I loved this show.

Best story structure 2023.

9 My Personal Weatherman

AKA Taikan Yoho

Japan Gaga

This is classic yaoi of the kind that really only works from Japan. Basically: boys who fell in love in college end up living together but both are so repressed they actually don't realize they're in love. It's high heat is well done, but it leaned into the "why don't they just talk for fuck's sake?" which is exacerbated by the fact that they're already fucking. Sure is sexy tho.

Best use of props 2023 for the shower of sheets.

10 Our Dining Table

AKA Bokura no Shokutaku

Japan Gaga

Lonely salaryman and talented cook gets accidentally adopted by a college kid and his little brother. It’s a quiet & cozy little parable of found family alleviating loneliness. It's lovely & sweet with the romance beats used to build a family relationship, not just couple intimacy. Special.

First prize for domesticity.

11 Laws of Attraction

Thailand iQIYI

This is a great gay suspense thriller with several solid couples, fun plot, killer characters, queer rep, and a happy ending. It’s tons of fun and I had an absolute blast watching it.

Charn wins my favorite character of 2023.

12 La Pluie

Thailand Viki

This BL takes to task the fated mates trope and what it means to have love chained intimately to predestination. It’s about how faith in destiny before choice diminishes the authenticity of emotion, relationships, and connection. This is a high concept to examine through the lens of a BL. With good chemistry and decent acting all around, plus some excellent high heat and representation of consent and a few other rare tropes, this one has to (like it’s sibling show My Ride) earn high marks.

Most interesting concept 2023.

13 The New Employee

Korea Viki

So good, SO QUEER, so soft, a near pitch perfect office BL with conflict derived from that setting. Also found family and a lesbian bestie. This is what I wanted from this new crop of office set KBLs ALL ALONG. Rainbow rice cakes forever!

Best overall queer rep from Korea.

14 Step By Step

Thailand Gaga & YouTube & Viki

This was Thailand’s answer to The New Employee, and everything I loved about that show I loved about this one. This was an office romance between stern boss and sweet subordinate that felt more authentic to an office environment than previous Thai BLs of this ilk which added tension to the narrative and character development.

Chot wins best queer character 2023.

15 Love Tractor

Korea iQIYI

Most of this country-set BL had me feral for the beautiful broken city boy and his hot young farmer. Hyung romance, puppy/cat pairing, open frankness meets jaded reserve, language play, water hose frolicking, only one bed = all my favorite silly tropes.

Biggest "he so pretty" gasp of the year award.

10 Worst BLs of 2023 (that I watched)

My Blessing

My Universe: Casanova Begins

Boyband the series

Cafe In Love

Chains of Heart

Hit Bite Love

Only Friends

Senior Love Me

The Luminous Solution

The Promise

Yes, you read that right. I know I'm against the flow but I really did not like Only Friends. Everyone's taste is different.

However I DNFed faster and more BL's this year than ever before, so that means my 10 worst probably aren't quite reflective...

10 Probably Actually Worst BLs (I dropped 'em)

My Story

The Day I Loved You

Beyond the Star

Crazy Handsome Rich

Dinosaur Love

House of Stars

Mr Cinderella 2

Love Bill

Stormy Honeymoon

The Star Always Follow You

Codicils in General

I only carefully track/watch Thailand, Taiwan, Korea, and Japan. Other countries are not fully represented.

My Numbers

So my spreadsheet chronicled 138 BLs that finish airing in 2023.

101 = watched & reviewed

2 = still in the docket (WDYEY2 & Love Syndrome III)

15 = CNF (could not find)

20 = DNF (which also accounts for how few very low scores I handed out in 2023 as opposed to previous years, I just stopped watching). Speaking of which...

Ratings spread

(# of stars. #of BLs given that rating)

0 (see the DNFs instead)

2 - IT'S DEPRESSING they killed the gay, save yourself

7 - I DON'T KNOW WHAT I AM WATCHING AND NEITHER DOES IT

7 - FATALLY FLAWED but still basically BL, however… do we want to support this kind of behavior?

9 - WATCH IF YOU HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO but don’t expect much, it’s a total hot mess

17 - WORTH WATCHING BUT FLAWED probably around the ending or in narrative structure/cohesion or censorship

14 - RECOMMENDED WITH RESERVATIONS i.e. isn’t quite BL, convoluted, not strictly HEA, too short/long, or chemistry issues

30 - RECOMMENDED some concerns around tropes (like dub con) or story structure but still satisfies as BL

13 - ABSOLUTELY RECOMMENDED probably a few pacing issues or one flaw

2 - HIGHLY RECOMMENDED faithful to tropes, happy ending, good chemistry, few flaws, high rewatch potential

(source)

[maidflowery]

Good Night, Sweet Dream

Jiaoqiu x Reader

You have a bad dream and Jiaoqiu is there for you. But at what cost?

You had a dream.

Or more precisely, a nightmare.

In that dream, you saw your Foxian boyfriend being led away in chains, about to be taken somewhere you didn't know.

"...!"

You tried to scream his name, but no voice would come out.

The coral pink-haired, fox-eared man continued to walk, looking straight ahead.

The fear of losing him came crashing down on you.

You tried to rush after him, your mouth wide agape, letting out soundless screams.

But for some reason, the more you ran, the farther he became. A vast distance spread between the two of you like the ocean, threatening to separate you forever.

Before long, you could feel something hot trickling down your cheeks.

Huh?

But then, the scenery changed completely.

All of the sudden, you found yourself in a lush meadow. Something pink and fluffy were running around. Foxes. Extremely cute foxes.

Like a child, your sorrow went forgotten as you went to chase one of the pink foxes.

Where is it going? Also, what is this delicious smell...?

Lucky you, the fox led you to an opening, where something unexpected appeared.

A giant meat bun!

That was right. A huge, white meat bun towered in front of you. Its silky smooth and fluffy surface had a vibrant pink hue to it.

You sniffed the air. Yes, this was where the yummy smell came from! There was no mistaking it!

It was a pork curry meat bun! The same dish your dear Foxian boyfriend had served you for dinner tonight!

You began salivating, your stomach growling in tandem.

Time to dig in!

You jumped at the meat bun, nibbling and chewing on its surface. However...

"Damn! Why is it so tough!?"

Despite looking so soft, the meat bun turned out to be chewy. Or maybe you should search for a softer spot, as illogical as it sounded. Well, it was a dream, anyway.

Thus, you moved your mouth somewhere else, only to be met with retaliation. Yes, the pink meat bun started jiggling and bouncing, pushing you away.

"What!? Wait!! My pork curry meat bun!!"

Having gone feral, you leaped at the retreating meat bun and chomped on it!

However, instead of a rich, spicy curry, something foreign entered your mouth... Something like, fur...?

"Huh!? Blergh! Cough, cough! Gross!"

Your eyes darted open. The familiar ceiling of your room greeted your sight.

...What a weird dream.

"How rude."

Before you could ruminate on the meaning behind such a cryptid dream, a silvery voice entered your ears. Unlike his usual gentle tone, his voice sounded sulky.

You tensed up. You had a bad feeling about this. Also, since when did he come home?

Slowly, you turned to look at the owner of the voice.

The moment you saw him, your jaw dropped.

Your Foxian boyfriend sat beside you. Actually, rather than sitting, it seemed as if someone had pushed him down into that position.

His sleeping robe was disheveled, its sash lying in a heap nearby, and his sculpted abs were in full display. His sleeves hung on his elbows, revealing his smooth and lean shoulders.

Moonlight streaming in through the window shone on the red marks that blossomed along his shoulder to his neck. And even his ear.

To put it simply, your boyfriend seemed to have been pounced on. And you had an inkling as to whom the culprit was. Besides, there were only the two of you in that room.

"Ha-haha... Hey there, Jiaoqiu. Since when are you home?"

Pathetic, you know.

Your boyfriend glared at you as if he had been wronged.

"Someone seemed to be having a nightmare, so I came to check on her. Absolutely nothing could prepare me for what was about to come..."

Jiaoqiu lamented like someone recounting a tragedy, each word slicing your heart like a knife.

"...Now that you've had your fill, you're just going to push me away? Humans are so fickle..."

As he stared at you in accusation, your boyfriend, whose beauty even surpassed that of a woman, seemed about to cry.

"J-Jiaoqiu, I didn't mean to... I'm really sorry, did I hurt you?"

You tried to soothe him. When you reached toward him, to your surprise, he leaned in.

Instead of answering you, your boyfriend asked you, golden eyes sparkling in yearning.

"Then, you won't push me away?"

Instead of answering him, you wrapped your arms around his neck, drawing him to you. Jiaoqiu surrendered himself to your embrace. The mattress sank as he slowly fell on top of you. Now that the two of you had settled in nicely, it was time to sleep.

Your Foxian boyfriend tended to get lonely. Although he didn't show it, he loved touching and being touched by you.

As he buried his face on your chest, you stroked his coral pink hair. His ear twitched as you gently caressed it.

"...But, Jiaoqiu."

"Hm?" He responded, his voice muffled.

"Your sash was way too tidy for it to have been removed by force. Stage a better accident next time. Or better yet, just tell me if you want to sleep together."

You could feel your boyfriend's lips curving into a smirk against your belly.

He lazily raised his head. A pair of golden eyes bore into yours, gleaming with schemes and intrigues.

"You caught me."

[kelperings]

Hi.hihihi I just wanted to say I really really really like ur art 😞 it's so yummy;can we get a komahina doodle pretty please :3

HIHIHI THANK U SM!! THAT MEANS A LOT TO ME. what does it taste like, a lot of people tell me it looks chewy.

YES OFC U CAN HAVE A KOMAHINA DOODLE MY DEAR DEAR ASKER!! i was at work so im sorry i couldnt get to this sooner.

future foundation brainrot has hit me

guys pslsplspsl ask me to draw stuff i fr will no matter how busy i am love u all

[kiwiplaetzchen]

"... and so I present to you: *The Lavender Soap Gummies*!"

William finally takes a napkin off a small bowl he was holding in his hand during his presentation. He was waving it around in front of Nosy but was never still enough for the niffler to grab onto it and spoil the surprise before time.

Of course, the prefect didn't actually make the sweets, no. He scoured a number of locations in Hogsmeade until one of the smaller confectionery shops on the outskirts of the village agreed to produce a small experimental batch of lavender scented chewy sweets. The confectioner was rather surprised by some aspects of the request. Namely, making the gummies feel as if you're biting into a bar of soap (in case Nosy liked it for the texture).

Of course, the recipe still has some room for improvement but for now one bowl of the gummies is enough to see if the niffler likes them at all. Will holds it in front of Nosy as an offering it is. Hopefully, he'll like the candy more and stops stealing Will's soaps...

Nosy squinted his eyes as William unveiled the mysterious bowl. His little paws twitched in anticipation, eager to pounce on whatever delight was hidden beneath the napkin. The Niffler's snout twitched in intrigue. This was new. As the pretty Prefect extended the bowl towards him, the little menace puffed out his chest and stood tall on his hind legs, giving a proud and somewhat exaggerated squeak. A worthy offering for a connoisseur like him!

He stretched his tiny paws, eager wiggling his fingers. With a determined squeak, Nosy made a quick dash and snatched a gummy from the bowl before Will could even react. Holding it up triumphantly, he examined it closely. The faint scent of lavender tickled his nose, a familiar yet unexpected aroma coming from a candy.

It looked innocent enough, with its soft, translucent lavender hue, but Nosy knew better than to trust appearances. He glanced up at the redhead with a cheeky glint in his eye, as if to say, "Is this your attempt to outsmart me, Mama Dearest?"

The Niffler took a small, tentative nibble. The gummy squished between his teeth, releasing a burst of lavender flavour that mingled strangely with the familiar texture of soap. His little nose wrinkled in surprise and delight. It was oddly satisfying.

With a cheeky grin, Nosy grabbed another gummy, and then another, and another, (and another), stuffing his little cheeks like a chipmunk. He shot Will a smug glance, as if to say, "Looks like you've earned yourself a temporary truce. Well done!"

Nosy let out a delighted honk, his approval clear, and scampered up to the Prefect’s shoulder, patting his cheek with an appreciative paw. Maybe, just maybe, he'll leave Will's soaps alone.

For today.

But only because these gummies are simply yummy.

[nanathott]

i wanna eat sylus from love&deepspace hes so chewy mouth-watering edible yummy nom nom i'm not even leaving crumbs licking the plate until its clean

CAN I GET A BITE???? HELLO???? OFFER ME A BITE??? ASK IF I WANT A BITE ASK ME ASK ME ASK ME

[invisibleraven]

going to a cat café for Reggie/Willie please and thank you

"I'm really more of a dog person," Reggie commented as Willie dragged him towards The Mat Catter Café.

"I'm not saying we bring one home," Willie replied. "But I thought it would be fun to enjoy some yummy treats while cute little kitties roam around."

"I do like treats..."

Willie grinned at that, bringing them in and asking for a table in the kitten room. They were seated quickly, and Willie cooed as a little tabby wound around his ankles.

Reggie smiled, loving how happy his partner looked, giving the kitten scritches while he looked over the menu and decided on a tray of pastry and lemonades to enjoy.

"While it might be tempting, please don't feed the cats any of your food," the hostess requested. "We do have treats for sale if you want though."

"I'll take a bunch!" Willie said, now cuddling a little orange cat while the tabby napped off on a stool nearby. He only let the kitten go as their food was delivered, though the cat was happy enjoy a nap in his lap.

"You're enjoying this way too much," Reggie said, though he was smiling as Willie pet the kitty while munching on a croissant.

Willie shrugged, and took a sip of his drink. "I've always liked animals, and my favourite group home growing up had a few cats. I even rescued a stray or two behind the club but Caleb made me take them to the SPCA since he was allergic."

Reggie smiled softly-Willie didn't like talking about his youth growing up in the foster system, so a happy memory of that time was a rare and precious thing. They had bonded over their terrible families and had strived to give each other the love and affirmation they had been denied for so long.

The waitress returned, giving them a small bag of treats, making a few pointy ears perk up. Willie attracted a tuxedo cat and a fluffy ball of white fur that the waitress told them was a ragdoll.

Reggie had to laugh as Willie was swarmed with cats, but he looked so delighted, he didn’t car about the amount of fur coating his clothes or the tiny needles from cats kneading him.

“You wanna try?” Willie asked, holding out the bag.

“I mean we should leave some cats for everyone else,” Reggie teased. But he still took the bag and held his hand out to the few cats roaming around him.

Finally a little calico with one eye came over, sniffing Reggie’s hand, rubbing at his fingers and gently nipping them before taking the piece of freeze dried salmon. Then jumped up into Reggie’s lap, spun around a few times and settled into a ball.

“She’s vibrating!” Reggie exclaimed.

“She’s purring Sparky,” Willie replied. “Means she likes you.”

Reggie was awed by how trusting this little cat was, and he gently stroked her soft fur. He felt his breathing slow, his whole body relaxing with the movement and the gentle purring.

“Oh wow,” the waitress remarked as she came to take their dishes. “Pirate never does this.”

“Nap?”

“On people,” she clarified. “We’ve had a real hard time getting her adopted because she’s so anti-social. She was abused, so she has a hard time trusting.”

“Is that how she lost her eye?” Reggie asked, laying his hand over the cat’s head, rubbing behind her ears.

The waitress nodded sombrely. “She’s fine now, and gets along fine with the other cats, but I’ve never seen her act like this with a human before.”

“You think she likes dogs?” Willie asked.

“Loves ‘em,” the waitress replied. “We’ve had her in a few foster homes and she loved the dogs there, just not the people.”

Reggie looked up at Willie, then down at the cat who shared so much background with the two of them. Who chose him out of everyone. And he couldn’t bear to leave her here.

“Can I get an adoption form?” he asked. “I think it’s about time we got Chewie a little sister.”

“Told you that you’d like it in here,” Willie snarked.

“I blame you,” Reggie said as Pirate glanced up at him, yawned and curled back up to resume her nap.

“I take it all,” Willie remarked. “Until you become a crazy cat dad and fill our house with felines.”

“I think she’ll be enough,” Reggie replied, petting the cat once more.

[aggressivedaikons]

🌻sumflober

MOCHI RECIPIE:

Mochi is my favorite thing to make!!! Ever!!! I use the microwave for convenience, but I want to try steaming it one day. Here’s like. My rough recipie for it Idk it gets it to the PERFECT texture for me (I like mine chewy and firmer) so yeh eheh all of my tips, coming from someone who is only measuring for the first time (I eyeball everything normally). Makes a decent serving??

Ingredients: - Glutinous Rice Flour (I use Koda Farms Mochiko) / 75g (I need more flour that’s why I’m not using too much) - wator / 145g - any kind of condensed flavoring (extract, syrups idk) / idk to taste - any kind of granulated sweetener / again to taste, add more water if too dry. - cornstarch for dusting

tools: - spatula - choptsticks when making batter(?) but spoon/fork also works just not my pref - GLASS bowl/Contianer

- combine water and flour until like. It’s got the viscosity of. Cum (YES I USE THIS AS A METRIC BECAUSE IT WORKS I DID IT AS A JOKE UNTIL I REALIZED IT’S EFFECTIVE IN GETTING THE RIGHT RATIO OF WATER/FLOUR DONT COME AT ME)

add in yir flavors!!! In drops, I did 2 vanilla, 1 peach, 3 coconut bc I’m putting this in peach cream chia pudding as a topping 😋 + sweetener I did 1/2 tbsp of truvia

I added food color too for fun, but keep it light (it will get darker trust) v light pink for peach color!!

COOKING:

cover the container first! And make sure it’s got a bit of an air hole. I use these silicone crofton bowl cover things

My microwave is 1000w! Adjust for power. cook in 30 sec intervals and stir between each one. This is VERY important becuase it will burn/overcook and die because this is a microwave. Also switch to a spatula NOW if you haven’t, it will be hell if you don’t. Also get out yir cornstarch.

just. Do it until it has a soft, but rubbery texture that bounces back. It might stick, but it can’t be creamy or anything. Mixing well helps.

when ready to transfer from container, get an airtight container and put come cornstarch in it. Then close it and shake it a ton this will make life easier.

let the hot mochi sit a bit, a few minutes (stirring helps) before transfering it to your container. Shake it again, like an insane person.

then let it cool in the container or store it for up to like 3 days and then YUMMY CRATULARUONS /REF YOU MADE IT

[lingy910y]

Weekly Tag Wednesday

tagged by @deedala and @energievie!

name: ling

location: ny

astrological sign: virgo

what's a tv show or movie you plan to rewatch this year? i don't like to rewatch whole things so prob just my shamey rewatch with my friend

what's a book or fic you will probably reread this year? the gallavich divorce fic prob, i haven't reread it in so long cause i stopped myself after like my 100th reread ok

what is a song you will likely continue to play on repeat? "slut!" by taylor swift

what's a tasty treat you look forward to eating more of this year? hmm idk what counts as a treat but croissants, even tho i'm getting tired of eating them everyday bc i bring them to school the soft/chewy ones are truly yummy

what's a time sink that you continue to sink time into this year? tumblr

did you pick up any habits in 2023 that you plan to continue? eh i'm just working on stuff i want to improve on

what's your toxic trait? not liking ppl but wanting friends at the same time 😔

what is a coping mechanism you will continue to indulge in this year? not rly indulging but it's also unhealthy - ignoring my thoughts/feelings cause my worst habit is the opposite aka ruminating

tell me something you like about how you look! i've been told many times that my eyes are pretty (cause they're big???) even tho i have bad eyesight and therefore wear glasses but that doesn't matter rn shh

give me at least three adjectives describing things you like about yourself. analytical, virtuous, imaginative

*phew* tagging @heymrspatel, @michellemisfit, @mmmichyyy, @krysmiss, @juliakayyy & @lupeloto

[canyouhearthelight]

Nihilus Rex, Ch. 14: Date Night

You didn't really think that yours truly could write this much of a story without some flat out tooth-decaying fluff at some point, did you?

I mean, who do you think I am??

But don't worry, @baelpenrose definitely did his part. Don't let his angsty ways fool you.

Hang my coat up in the first bar

There is no peace that I've found so far

The laughter penetrates my silence

As drunken men find flaws in science

Their words mostly noises

Ghosts with just voices

Your words in my memory

Are like music to me

Snow Patrol, “Set Fire to the Third Bar”

Lash

              At six forty-five on the dot, I spotted Nils from across the parking lot behind the comedy club. His expensively worn-out leather pants made me feel a little better about having braved the kohl eyeliner and mascara, along with wearing clothes that actually fit instead of the baggy cargos I wore day to day.  It looked like I overshot, though, because he started to walk right past me. 

              “It can’t be that bad,” I joked, grabbing his arm and startling him into turning around. I forced down the self-conscious feeling that tried to bubble into my throat.

              He started and then turned and stared, pale face flushing. “I uh…I’ve never seen you dressed up like this before.” His eyes flicked up and down my outfit, then fixed on my face. “You look amazing.”

              I kicked one foot playfully, looking down at my jeans and boots. “Usually I’m trying to avoid being noticed.  Pretty sure these boots were made to grab attention - they’re vintage. Borrowed them from Mama, and don’t ask why she owns them, because I don’t want to think about it.”  Thank god she did, though - cavalier boots were expensive, and these were actually real leather.

              “They look good on you. So does the sweater.” Nils took my arm. “I believe I promised you a drink?” 

              “Yes, sir. One cherry bomb, let’s go!” I tugged on his hand, leading us to the door. Without batting an eye, I handed my ID and cover to the door guy, knowing he wasn’t going to look hard enough to do the math.  Sure enough, he took the cash, handed back the card, and slapped a wristband on to show I was old enough to buy alcohol.  Nils just arched an eyebrow at me as he did the same.

              Once we were in, Nils let me lead him to the bar and delivered the orders - a cherry bomb and a Malibu sunrise. “You a fan of standup, or just the headliner?” 

              “Mmmm, bit of both,” I answered carefully. “Not a fan of the kind of standup that goes for the cheap jokes, but the headliner tonight is really clever. You don’t really expect the punchlines, it’s smart.”

              “Gotcha. So, uh. What the fuck is a cherry bomb? I’m not like. A mixed drinks expert but I know my way around a bar and I’ve never heard of that one…”

              “Ooo, you’ll have to try a sip,” I teased. “It’s cherry vodka and Redbull, kind of a big girl cosmo.  Tastes like those sour cherry candies, the bright red chewy ones.” I paused for a second before remembering. “If they’re mixed right. Some places add grenadine, and then it tastes like cough syrup.  They should be clear if they’re made right.”  Our drinks were set down right then, and I grabbed mine, taking a sip before holding it in front of his face. “See? No color.”

              Nils raised his eyebrows. “Swap sips? Thing I ordered is peach, rum, and coconut. Tastes like a melted smoothie, mostly - strong though, but it doesn’t taste like it.” 

              I reached for his, game for a little challenge. It was smooth, as promised, kind of like a fuzzy navel if it weren’t for the coconut.  Not my jam, but not bad at all.

              He took a sip of the cherry bomb and smiled. “This is excellent. Not quite my taste for a mixed drink, but amazing. Doesn’t taste like alcohol at all.”

              “I know, right? Yummy.” I turned to scope out the room before settling on a table roughly mid way back on the left hand side.  Without a word, I grabbed the first thing my hand landed on above Nils’ waist - either a pocket or a belt, I wasn’t sure - and started dragging him behind me. “Gotta snag the heckle-free table before it gets taken,” I explained when he yelped. Something wet sloshed on my arm, and I mentally promised to replace the drink I was probably now wearing.

              “Sorry!” he grabbed a napkin and started dabbing at my sleeve as we sat down. “I did not mean to splash that on you.” 

              “No worries, it’s my fault. And it’s wool, don’t worry about stains or anything.”

              “Ah.” He sat down. “How did you find out about this place originally?” 

              “Really bad day, and I wanted cheering up?” The look he gave me made it clear he wasn’t buying it, so I relented. “They actually found me.  Needed some advertising done and some security cameras set up, paid me half cash and free tickets to a show.  We’ve been loyal business partners ever since.”

              “That makes sense. So you did some art for them and did the systems for the security cams? That’s pretty awesome.” He gave me a strange look, very obviously forcing himself to keep his eyes on mine. “So you take all your shady hacker friends here, or just me?” 

              I stretched, waving at one of my favorite servers with a grin. “Nah, this is my sanctuary, kind of. Somewhere I can just be young and normal, do completely legal work for legal-in-two-weeks pay.  Please tell me you guys have poppers tonight? You were out last time, and it made me sad.” I pouted at the server with the biggest doe-eyes I could manage without laughing.

              She scowled at me for all of three seconds before cracking a smile. “Double order, extra ranch?”

              Nils pulled out a card. “Whatever she says. She’s just showing me around.” 

              I bit my lip to stifle the laugh when the server rolled her eyes and flipped her hair in mock arrogance. “Lashy-love does not pay for food.  Anything but the drinks are comped.” She looked at me and rolled her eyes again. “New guys. What are you gonna do?”

His face! “I told you it was cute when you thought you won.”

              He recovered with reasonable game. “You, Lash, are a genie and not the nice kind. Side note, you get better ‘free stuff’ contracts than I do - best I have is a nerd hobby shop that gives discounts.” He paused as he took another sip. “Though it is nice to finally get actual confirmation on your age. You’re 21 in two weeks, huh?” The lazy grin was back. 

              “For the record, I’m still trying to find volume seven of Battle Angel Alita,” I pointed out. “But yes. Lash Dalita is twenty-one as of a month ago. Elakshi is twenty-one in two weeks.”

              “That’s your name? It suits you. Thank you for telling me. Still can’t use it, right?” 

              “I would prefer you didn’t, yeah.  It’s… kind of the line in my mind that keeps my parents and sister safe.  For them, I’m Elakshi. For everyone else, I’m Lash.  Lash Dalita can get arrested without hurting my family.”

              He nodded, somberly. “I won’t use your real name. Not unless you tell me I can.” he let that sit between us. “Question though - why Dalita? I’m not an expert on Indian or Pakistani culture, but isn’t ‘dalit’ the term for…low-caste, often discriminated against?”

              Ooo, not so dumb after all. “It means ‘outcast, untouchable, undesirable’, yeah.  It’s kind of a private joke - who chooses to work with the ‘poor, discriminated against girl’, and who steers clear.”

              Nils visibly thought about saying something. “No One, apparently.” The tone made it clear that the word was capitalized. “I like your alias. Good signal for solidarity with people who need it.” 

              I winked as the plate of deep fried goodness hit the table. “You aren’t the only one with clever jokes.”

              “Clearly not.” He gestured at the guy who’d taken the stage. “Warm up acts here normally good?” 

              “He’ll either make us laugh, or make us laugh at how bad he is.  Worth finding out, right?”

              “Oh totally.” Nils leaned back. “If I can ask, and you can tell me to fuck right off, how are your family doing since…” He left unspoken the obvious. Since the liens released. Since debt stopped hanging over their heads. Since we rewrote millions of people’s financial situations. 

              I lowered my voice as the opener started what looked to be a truly poor patter. “He’s being Baba - I promise that will make sense eventually. But he doesn’t fully trust good things, so he is putting what he would pay on the car and my student loans into a separate account, just in case he has to end up paying. He says worst case scenario, he has the money to pay, best case scenario, he has extra savings. Truly a win-win, insert self satisfied expression here.  For him, that means he is happier than a pig in shit, honestly.”

              “And, if i can ask, how are you feeling about no more student loans?” There was something urgent there. His gaze snapped back to the stage and he chuckled. “Wow, you weren’t kidding about win-win with comedy. Latter option, here, but hey, it’s a warm up act.”

“Poor guy, yeah,” I chuckled, snagging a jalapeno popper and drenching it in thick ranch. “Student loans weren’t a huge problem, for me, thankfully - I got lucky. Only had a loan for my first semester, so it was something just north of seven grand.  I gave Baba the principal, he insisted on paying the interest because ‘usury is theft’, but it was something around seventy-five a month. I still give him the money, he sets it aside in savings, and I draw a couple more yaoi to make up the difference, just like before.” I took a bite of food and pointed at Nils with the other half. “By the way, South Park yaoi, real big right now.” 

“I’d say ew but my most profitable artistic side hustle was Avengers Mpreg A/B/O garbage paid by the page, so…actually, fuck it. ‘Ew, but I’ve done worse’.” He shrugged. “Amazing what internet perverts will pay for.” 

“Aww, A/B/O Mpreg not your jam? More of a tentacle guy?” I teased before giving an exaggerated shudder. “Don’t get me wrong, I have drawn entirely too many ovipositors and feet. But those so-called perverts pay really good money, so I refuse to judge them.” I did a mock toast before draining what was left of my drink. “Hmm. Water or another? The dilemma is very real.”

“I’m more of a ‘dangerous women who could kill me’ and ‘cute femboys and/or barra’ guy, which you almost certainly could have guessed from my everything, but that’s hardly the point. Also, I generally space drinks with water because it makes it take longer to get wasted and we’re gonna be here a while. Figure water first, then another?” 

“I think we do both, since the water will get refilled automatically, whereas we have to get up to get drinks. Sound good?” I pointed at the plate between us. “Besides. While I am fully capable of eating these by myself, I have no intention of doing so.”

He laughed. “I appreciate you. And yeah, sounds good.” He picked one up and took a slow bite. “Oh, holy shit this is amazing. I love this.” 

“The only place I know that makes their own,” I shook my head slowly in disbelief. “Fresh peppers, cream cheese, bacon wrapped, breaded, and fried.” I pointed to the ranch. “Don’t miss out on that shit, either. Extra garlic, extra salt, extra dill. Amazing.”

He dipped the popper in it and took a small bite, his eyes popping. “Oh my god. Lash. How did you..?” 

“I will eat jalapeno poppers from any gas station or drive through… this is all the cook in the back. Who I joyfully would one day marry, sight unseen, if he weren’t already married.” I took another bite and chewed thoughtfully. “Wife’s pretty cute, though. You saw her.”

Nils raised his eyebrows. “Damn. Just a husband-wife team run this place, huh? Love it.” 

I waffled a hand back and forth. “Sort of. Bartender isn’t family, and I don’t think they’re related to the owner. But if there is a good show, those two are always working.  You can imagine she cleans up on tips, between the food and - I mean, you saw her.” I gave him a sardonic look, knowing good and well the man wasn’t blind, no matter how much he was trying to make a good impression. Michelle plus pulse equaled crush, it was just physics.

“I can imagine.” He seemed to decide to take a chance, after weighing his thoughts for a second. “If I may be so bold, though, my attention was rather occupied by another young woman.” 

Thank fuck the lights were dimmed, I thought as my face heated up. “Glad to know the effort hadn’t gone to waste,” I blurted out before I could stop myself.  A hand immediately flew to my mouth and my eyes widened. “I - I didn’t mean…. Oh, god, I said that out loud…” I groaned and covered my face with both hands.

Nils was smiling, but it wasn’t his usual, something-far-away, private-joke smile, with something else he was thinking about. It was a sincere expression, with an amusement entirely in the moment. “Apparently I’m not the only one who trips over my own words sometimes either? But no, Lash.” He blushed. “I’ve noticed for a while. Hard not to when we did all that together and I got to see firsthand how brilliant you are, how hard you go for…everything.”

Applause erupted around us, and I was relieved to see the poor opener had finished his set. I felt so bad for him, but right now I was too embarrassed to do more than clap enthusiastically that neither of us had died of humiliation. “Hold that thought, I am going to get our next round of drinks. You flag down Michelle and order waters. No lemon, they don’t wash them.  And if she asks, tell her tap water. It’s the only kind they have, but she asks sometimes to figure out if people are going to tip or not.”

Nils nodded, face flushing, hopefully harder than mine. I took off to the bar, holding up a twenty to get attention. “One shot of vodka, neat.  Then a cherry bomb and a… shit. Malibu sunrise! That’s it.”  The shot was delivered first, and I downed it immediately to calm my nerves. When the other drinks appeared, I stuffed the twenty in the tip jar and paid with my card before heading back to our table.             

              “One Malibu sunrise, as promised for spilling the first one,” I proclaimed, setting the drink down with a flourish before taking my seat.  Two glasses of water and an empty shot glass were already there, and I barely set my drink down before tipping my head back with laughter, tears coming to my eyes. “Same brain, I see.  I had one at the bar.”

              “What’s your shot of choice?” The grin was back, even if the flush was still sort of there, as he, seeming to act almost by instinct, had stood up as I’d come back and sat down. 

              “Stoli,” I gasped, carefully dabbing tears from my eyes to avoid smudging my makeup. “Just the right price point that I don’t feel bad throwing back, but doesn’t burn or taste foul like the cheaper stuff. You?”

              “Jack Daniels. Cheap whiskey, you know. My grandfather was the first one in the family to make any money, said he really liked the kind of cheap stuff he grew up with. Kind of a soothing thing, and he and I were close.” He looked like he wanted to say more, but shrugged.

              “My family doesn’t drink except for holidays that require it,” I confessed. “We aren’t Muslim, by the way. A lot of people seem to think that, like I’m some black sheep or something. Baba just doesn’t get the point of drinking, and Mama is too much of a control freak. But Holi…. Hooo, you should see them.”

              “Hindu holidays then? Tell me about some of those. Google only gets me so far and I want to know more about you. What’re they like?” 

              “We’re… culturally Hindu, I guess you could say.  On Baba’s side. Mama is culturally Jewish, actually.  It’s a weird mix when it gets to holidays - Holi, then Passover, that kind of thing.  Funerals are very emotional. Beef and pork are pretty much just out of the question at home, in general.  Mama isn’t observant, so fermented foods are okay, and Baba would die without yeasted bread, I swear.  But both sides are very family oriented, so any excuse to get together is always an unbelievable amount of people.  I gave up keeping track, honestly.”

              “Big family get togethers. That sounds awesome. Complicated, but beautiful. Energetic, amazing.” 

              I wanted to ask Nils about growing up Catholic - a kind of sterility I couldn’t even fathom, honestly, in my messy, emotional family - but the headlining act came on and wasted no time in doing her audience work.  “Hands up if you’re married!  Keep them up if you came without your spouse!  And whose spouse has already messaged or called…”

              I took a long chug of water before I started laughing, knowing that I had about thirty seconds before I would start choking otherwise.  Sure enough, the first person in the crowd was called upon and Nils’ drink went spraying on the floor as some poor woman called out that her husband had texted asking where the ketchup was.

              “Okay, yeah, see why you love her.”

              “They asked if we had any clean towels!”

              I nodded, my face hurting too much from laughing to give a good response.  The second an older man shouted out that his male partner texted to ask if the partner had already had a hysterectomy, I knew any conversation was done for the rest of the set.

[naileadevoras]

* — 𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒚 𝒃𝒊𝒓𝒕𝒉𝒅𝒂𝒚 𝒕𝒐 @pcrtrait !

may all your birthday wishes come true ! ( even the illegal ones )

oh my gosh , i can't believe it's renee day today !!! happiest birthday to you the loml , my braincell twin , my bff , my one & onli ૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა ! i hope you have the best day ever today because you truly deserve it <3 i am so happy we crossed paths 3-4 years ago on this hellsite we call tumblr . you're such an amazing & hard working human being ! plus , a very talented writer ♡ i love how you can listen to all the dumb rambles i have . i swear , we just match each others insane & crazy ( maybe even sometimes delusional ) thoughts . timezones are wild & even though we live a thousand miles away from each other , i still feel like you literally just live ten minutes away from me . & i love how sometimes , when life gets busy or we forget to respond to each others messages , we can always just hit each other up & it'll feel like zero time has passed . i have soooo many fond memories of our friendship ♡ from plotting on tumblr , to making pinterest boards , gushing about our wbotm , creating spotify playlists , & more ! i hope we can create more memz together * cough * australia and japan next with medusa & chewie ? also , pls tell me everything that happened on your birthday ( idk when you're gonna see this bc you're probably asleep right now . ) enjoy your night , bestie ! hope you get all the gifts you want , eat all the yummy cake and food , & drink all the boba / starbucks u want because it's what you deserve ♡ p.s , here's a manip of our bbs that i made but forgot to add it to the main graphic bc i'm dumb 💀

again , happiest birthday to you renee ! i looooove u soooo very much . mwah mwah kith kith smooch smooch <33

[absolutebl]

Leaving GMMTV aside, what were youre favorite shows this year so far? I'll have more free time coming up and im way behind and out of the loop, so some recs would be appriacted, wise sage. Especially for those shows that didnt get the attention they deserved in your opinion! Thanks a lot!

Top 10 BLs of 2023 So Far

Our Dating Sim

(Korea) 10/10 Viki

If you haven't watched this, it's a must. I actually handed out a 10/10. I NEVER do that. It's a perfect short form KBL, an office set reunion romance featuring geeks that really suits 8 eps with no fluff and no chaff. Just comforting and yummy. I adored every aspect from the casting to the pristinely simple premise to the quietly smooth execution. Sure it’s low stakes, but that makes it high domesticity and extremely warm and gentle. This is a fuzzy blanket of a story - a cozy BL. It lives in my rewatch pile and you know what’s best about it? Every single episode is in that pile. There’s no skipping with this one, it might be good natured and calmly sweet but it’s tight and the pacing is excellent. Full review here.

My School President

(Thai) 9/10 YouTube

GMMTV gave us a classic high school set Thai BL with tropes like messy boys singing their feelings that made this one Love Sick for the modern age with all the gentle sweetness and pining ache, but none of the dated damaging tropes or issues. Yes, we’ve seen it all before, but I still ADORED this. And there is a lot to be said for the classics being re-executed perfectly. Who let my BL be this wholesome and funny? This show was fantastic, it’s only flaw was the singing (and that’s my baggage). My favourite GMMTV BL offering to date. And yes, I've watched them ALL.

(you said no GMMTV but I have to include it)

The Eighth Sense

(Korea) 9/10 Viki

One of the longest BLs Korea has given us and (like Blueming) it feels more atmospheric gay coming of age romance than strictly BL. It’s got a bit of an age gap, country boy/city boy, stellar acting, complex characters, and leads with great chemistry and tension. It’s a bit chewy and sticky and less perfect than most KBLs (do I detect a touch of Taiwan?) This one deployed BL tropes (messy eater, shoulder sleep, protective seme, there’s even some hyung-slinging) but front loaded them with painful backstory and tons angst drives the 2nd half. This isn’t in the KBL bubble, there’s sharp edges and lots of triggers. For a BL the darkness of the content left me feeling unsettled (which is the only reason it didn't get a perfect score) but it does have a glorious ending and that counts for a lot.

The New Employee

(Korea) 9/10 Viki

So good, SO QUEER, so soft, a near pitch perfect office BL with conflict derived from that setting. Also found family and a lesbian bestie. Sweet & innocent (and out) Seung Hyun scores the office internship of his dreams. On his first day at work he gets into it with his cool reserved (and also v gay) boss. As you do. Frankly? This is what I wanted from this new crop of office set KBLs ALL ALONG. Rainbow rice cakes forever! Directed by queer activist Kim Jho Gwang Soo (Just Friends?) partly set in the same neighbourhood as the To My Star house. Gotta love WATCHA (Semantic Error, Light on Me).

Unintentional Love Story

(Korea) 9/10 iQIYI

A boy who just lost his job due to faked corruption charges accidentally discovers his ex-boss's favorite artist, now a recluse. Evil manager offers him his job back if he can convince the artist to rejoin society. Instead, they fall in love. I found the artist a bit stiff and reserved but Gongchan (maknae of B1A4) is a fucking GIFT - he carried this show (which I do not expect from the idol element). He was luminous with extraordinarily expressive eyes, just drown in the emoting abyss. The external conflict, social tension and pressure is complex and beautifully executed, plus Korea gave us legit side dishes (NOT a love triangle, hally-fucking-luya). I’m not sure on rewatchability, and it didn’t whip me into a verbal frenzy the way some KBLs do, but it still gets a solid 9/10 for those damn eyes alone.

Destiny Seeker

(Thai) 8/10 grey

A darn near perfect pulp featuring 3 likeable tsundere/sunshine pairings with uncomplicated iterations of enemies to lovers. At least one half of each does a decent amount of pining and there’s good chemistry, classic tropes, and communication rep. It’s fun and full of linguistic jokes. Sublimely cheesy but a good rainy day offering with tons of rewatch potential. Full review here.

Make a Wish

(Thai) 8/10

PNR (from Sammon - Manner of Death & Triage) about a doctor who can see the dead and strikes a bargain with a wish-granting irreverent tree angel - naturally they fall in love. Stars Fluke Natouch opposite not-Ohm, but who cares bc Fluke has chemistry with everybody. Once again the Thai afterlife is incredibly bureaucratic but I enjoyed the premise and the unfolding of the story (it’s not predictable but v. satisfying and with nice little twist). I like that the doctor is just gay af, fag hag bestie and everything. The cast is excellent but the comedic stylings are too overblown and tonally off. It had sad parts and did make me cry but is ultimately happy with a great sex scene, good smiley kisses, and all the agency.

All the Liquors

(Korea) 8/10 Viki & Gaga

A pretty classic foodie set KBL that managed to distinguish itself from others in this category by having a particularly satisfying final episode centered around found family. Sunshine sweetie soju rep gets involved with a shy introvert chef who doesn’t drink. This has a somewhat uneven plot and ridiculous central conceit (much in the way of Tasty Florida or Behind Cut), but if you are looking for a restaurant BL with Korea’s signature softness, then this is a great option. FYI I may identify with our baby party boy hedonist more than any other BL lead ever presented.

Love Mate

(Korea) 8/10 Viki

Features a very much openly gay older uke with commitment issues and a romantic (if arrogant) younger seme with no respect for boundaries (hyung romance). Workplace harassment much? That’s BL for ya. (Also a nonBL Kdrama specialty.) So yeah it’s questionable, but so is my taste. The ultimate premise that someone badly hurt shuts themself off to romance is very similar to Happy Merry Ending or 8th Sense but this version was more about fear than abuse or trauma. For me, this made Love Mate more relatable. However, because the denouement was driven by a late addition faen fatal, the conclusion felt rushed and forced. I can, however, see myself rewatching this one, so it falls into the general rank of 2023′s KBL aka solid high standard and eminently watchable.

Bed Friend

(Thai YouTube, Gaga, iQIYI)

Office frienamies transition a flaming hot one night stand into a f-buddy relationship that is built on a puppy/cat dynamic (and kinks into it at one point). Our puppy is loyal, smitten, and protective with endlessly longing eyes, while our cat is snarky, prickly, and deeply damaged (ALL THE TRIGGERS). NetJames give lovely high-heat with excellent chemistry and tuned-in performances of surprising depth, unfortunately the story ultimately failed them. Had the show had the strength of its convictions and kept to a tighter, darker, harsher 8 eps it would have been the first high heat to earn a 10/10 from me, but once they fussed with it, it dropped to a solid 8/10. Could have been great but was overworked. Still if high heat is your thing, this one will not let you down. Full review here. (Triggers include: child abuse, attempted rape, family abuse)

(3x! 3x Tumblr ate this post. They HAVE to de bug their new editor. This never happens with the old one. Biggest bug is with the "undo" function, DO something about it!)