#AJA IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE I SWEAR

[inkbloodpages]

Writeblr Introduction:

Name: Aja/Jaq

Pronouns: He/She/Ze/They, pretty much anything but it (whatever you feel my vibe is, there are no wrong answers)

I write the occasional shitty poem, and I have a few wips that I’m planning on posting about. I love pirates, cowboys, Treasure Planet, and Merlin, as well as a lot of other things, but those are the main things I talk about here.

@scoobydoowhatareyou is one of my alt blogs, you can pry the name of my main blog from my cold, dead hands, this is for feelings and if one of my real life friends finds this I’ll kill them and then die

@A_Human_Tree on AO3 (I swear, I’ll update eventually)

[nyorierd]

Diary of, 06 September, 2023.

Di malam aku bilang, aku butuh waktu, aku memang lagi down sejadi-jadinya. Aku gatau apa yang salah tp udah pasti aku jadi menyalahkan segalanya. Pikiran aku lagi kacau, bertabrakan jg sama perasaan aku. Mangkanya aku minta waktu ke kamu dari pada aku mikir yg engga-engga tentang kamu, aku masih mau pertahanin kamu dihidup aku, at least lebih lama lagi, sampe bisa ketemu kamu lagi secara langsung

aneh ya, emang lg aneh. Aku nulis ini dihari yang sama buat aku kasih tau ke kamu nantinya.

Yang aku pikirkan banyak. Finansial udah pasti, ayahku, and the fact that I had to stay ke ibu aku lagi biar hemat, I swear aku bener-bener masih se-awkward itu tinggal dirumah ibu, begitu juga perlakuannya, lebih kayak numpang aku jadinya. But still I'm hoping something good karena awal masuk SMA dulu juga pernah begini, dan aku bisa melewatinya kok walau berat.

Dari situ, aku masih menjalar lagi pikiran aku dengan ospek. Bersosialisasi, aku gak suka banget kata itu dari aku kecil. Aku jadi mulai khawatir dengan masa ospek ini. Rasa cemasnya terus memuncak, makin memuncak tiap harinya, aku selalu ada masalah dengan hari-hari kayak gini..

Aku tau, kayak yang pernah aku bilang, seharusnya aku bisa cari teman dengan mudah, karena banyak event yang aku datengin. Aku bisa have fun sama orang yang bener-bener asing dalam seharian, bertukar sedikit gurau juga cerita akhirnya pisah dipenghujung acara. Harusnya masa pengenalan ini juga begitu kan?

Iyaa.. aku cuman terlalu banyak berpikir, dilewati aja juga belum. Aku tau, aku ada masalah dengan mental kalo berkaitan hal sekolah, juga seisinya, dan kampus it's another level to handle, mangkanya aku makin-makin lagi terpikir dengan banyak hal yang bikin aku cemas berkepanjangan, padahal aku selalu nunjukin kalo aku semangat buat kuliah. I did. I am. But.. still.

Aight, that's my feeling through the days. Aku tau gak selesai-selesai. Di masa kayak gitu, yang pernah aku lewatin adalah aku masih bisa pulang ke anak GM kapanpun aku mau, jadi walaupun ada rasa cemas tapi, gak setinggi kali ini, aku literally punya rumah, punya orang yang bisa jadi tempat aku lari.

Selalu ada tempat istirahatnya, cemasnya jadi langsung hilang dihari yang capek itu, tapi sekarang.. aku hadepin bener-bener sendirian. Anyways. Iya, anak GM seberpengaruh itu dalam hidup aku. Dan kehilangan mereka gak pernah bisa tergantikan. I tried to replaced it with you, but sure kamu juga punya struggle nya sendiri. All the time after I said, aku bisa bergantung sama kamu atau engga.. udah pasti gak selalu bisa, i get it. I truely get it.

Then I wanted to talk about ourselves on that phone call, sampe aku nanya kamu masih merasa asing apa engga sama aku. I wanted to hear it from you, because like I said, aku selalu mengoreksi diri sama temen-temen aku, apa yang aku gak suka from each of them, begitu pula sebaliknya. Aku suka pembahasan itu, suka banget, so i can be a better person for you. For the people that I actually care and love too, to make them stay

tapi agaknya susah ya ngobrol sama kamu, also padat juga jadwal kamu jadi pasti kamu capek dan gak fokus akan pembahasannya, jadi ada beberapa hal yang aku tanyakan kurang memuaskan apa yang pengen aku denger dari kamu. It's alright, salah aku juga timingnya kurang, we can talk about it later.

The only reason why I always wanted to talk about this is, aku ngerasa belum mengenal kamu seutuhnya sebagai diri kamu, aku tau pasti gak semua hal bisa kamu lepas buat beritahu ke aku, but at least about your life story, the whole big plot of it, I want to hear it. Your story. And I would totally love to tell mine too. For sure, no doubt at all.

Begitu tau tentang diri masing-masing, background hidup kita, aku jadi bisa lebih mengerti kamu, juga paham situasi-situasi yang membuat kamu triggered, atau gak nyaman, and I will make it comfortable for you. and I will keep try my best.

I'm sorry this had a whole ass paragraph, but you get it now from my perspective..

I wanna be clear to you.

Also.. Aku iri sama temen kamu, iya.. yang dua hari bersama udah langsung kamu ajak nginep, idk how to tell you that I kinda jealous.. but well what a childish way to think like that right. I'm sorry, as long you.. you comfortable then. To not make you feel that lonely di kos.. I also can't help it am I right.

I still feeling gloomy because of your texts, more gloomy even. Jadi, dari pada aku mikir tentang kamu.. hubungan kita yang engga-engga, jadi aku istirahat dulu dari kamu. But just forget it, kamu sibuk dengan tugas kamu, aku malah begini. I'm sorry.

And yah.. pemikiran yang memberatkan tadi juga gak mau nunggu giliran, semuanya nambrak jadi satu, itu buat aku makin bingung, aku nangis lagi entah udah yang keberapa kalinya. Cuman itu yg bisa bikin aku ngantuk dan capek sesek sampe akhirnya ketiduran walau bingung mau ngadepin hari besoknya gimana, masih takut sama rasa cemas diri aku sendiri..

that's for the explanation then ( ◜࿁◝ ) ..

[yellowocaballero]

saw your tags on that last ask [eyes emoji] moon knight fic is a huge untapped market, i'm telling you, especially for the kind of long fics you tend to write (since there's like less than a thousand fics total right now and most are pretty short) :)

The Moon Knight tag is a fucking barren wasteland. I opened it up and I saw tumbleweeds. And horniness for Oscar Isaac. Awful.

I'm trying to finish the No Chip thing I'm writing /the Batman fanfic I started writing MONTHS ago and got distracted from by Star Wars that I really want to go back to /for just like god's sakes anything else but yes these weirdo little guys are taking up brain space. Imagine having so many problems that you just make up a guy about them. So great. Marc put Steven in a turtle terrarium and fed him a lot of spinach and gave him a lot of enrichment and this is a great use of his time and a reasonable coping mechanism. Hot new Deviantart sona self-insert OC dropped and he's a little meow meow, very unproblematic, has all of my wife's interests, look he's a vegan - look, Konshu, you told me to get a hobby, this counts -

The thing is that I am a gigantic fucking comics nerd, and any kind of comics thing I write integrates an embarrassingly large amount of knowledge. The Loki fic I wrote ages ago was a combination of three different Thor comic runs, the Fraction & Aja Hawkeye, two different TV shows, MCU Thor 1, my medievalism classes in college, and the Poetic Edda. The X-Men series from FOREVER ago was an actual combination of 50 years worth of characters. Or the Batman stuff, and I will absolutely not admit how much Batman I've read in my life. I know more about Deadpool than 95% of the people who write Deadpool fanfic I SWEAR -

I actually know jack, zero, and shit about Moon Knight. There's not much to know, he's boring. Those funny comic panels are photoshopped. He's never had a really good comic. I wouldn't be speaking from a love of the character. I would mostly be speaking from the intense hilarity of the entire premise. Which is usually enough for me, but what that effectively means is I have a lot of jokes but no concrete plot for a fic.

I will say - why is the entire Tumblr tag woobie'ing Marc? He's really morally gray. That's the whole thing. Him sucking a bit is kind of the crux of the entire show, it's why so much of the show happens. He is literally girlboss gaslight gatekeep. If he didn't suck then Steven wouldn't be a thing. Why aren't we focusing on how hilarious this show is.

[awakefor48hours]

Talking about ROTT

Since I can’t just keep talking to my sibling about it, I’m just gonna say what I felt about this movie. So I’m going over the things I liked first, then I’m going over the things I didn’t like.

The Good

Since TOA is REALLY good with writing, my expectations were through the roof and it actually started off REALLY good. Claire opening a portal to the subway that she mentions is going 55mph shows that not are the writers considering real life physics but also to show just how strong Claire has gotten with her shadow magic (you have no idea how many times I said “yeah, you girlboss gatekeep gaslight”). The fight was so beautiful to watch, I LOVED it, and it raised my expectations for the rest of the movie. 

The use of an anti magic generator was also very interesting and shows just how good Krel has gotten with developing technology and I’m so proud of him for that. 

Douxie (who needs a break) switching bodies with Nari isn’t something I’ve seen a lot of people talk about but it was really cool to see. Douxie has gotten so much better with his magic and was willing to sacrifice himself for the world (because that’s what heroes do)

Strickler and Barbra are getting married, good for them. I’m surprised that I’m actually VERY happy for them considering how much I don’t like their romantic relationship (I just feel like they’d be better off as friends) but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m happy for them.

“For the good of all” no longer “for the glory of Merlin.”

Jlaire continuing to be a happy and healthy het couple. 

Strickler sacrificing himself for Jim was great, it shows just how much he really does care about the Lakes. Also, I love when stories have characters that will sacrifice their lives to help everyone else save the day only for their death to mean nothing. The reason why I like it is because it shows the ugly side of war and how it isn’t as glamorous as movies make it out to be.

Nomura’s death was brutal but also shows just how much she’s changed. She used to loathe Jim and everyone else but in the end she gave everything to try and stop Nari.

An eldritch god and alien mech fight? YES PLEASE! (I even said during that fight “do you livestream or pray when this happens.”) 

CLAIRE, CLAIRE, CLAIRE, CLAIRE

That fight between Nari and Skrael. Yes, yes.

The final battle *chef’s kiss* yes, you go Jim. You go on and malewife, mansplain, and manipulate.

There are so many good things that happened in the movie that it makes me sad to write the next part.

The Bad (I’m very angry so there will be a lot of swearing)

Like most of the fandom, I want to say what the ACTUAL fuck was that ending. No, I need actual answers WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK WAS THAT ENDING.

The Krohnisfere, the WORST thing in this entire series. Jim has been through A LOT and obviously loosing Toby was hard on him but to just erase EVERYTHING, nope, nope, nope. This is even worse than a “it was all a dream” ending, hell, it would’ve been better as a “it was all a dream” twist for so many reasons:

Everything that happened for the past FIVE FUCKING YEARS have been for NOTHING. Every plot twist, mystery, battle, etc have been erased and now have no meaning. Not to mention, Jim is the only person that can come out of this alright. There’s literally no way Jim can stop what’s happening on A-5, so Aja and Krel’s parents WILL be in a status and since Jim was in a different state while 3Below was happening that means he has no way to know how to stop General Morando from stealing Gaylen’s core and therefore has no way to stop Aja and Krel’s parents from sacrificing themselves for the world. There’s no way Jim can stop Merlin from getting killed by Arthur. So in the end, the Tarron kids and Douxie lose their parental figures while Jim gets Toby back. Jim doesn’t really sacrifice or lose anything, he gets everything he wants. 

It undermines the entire purpose of episode 37 (Unbecoming-season 2, episode 11) because the issue is that we SAW what would happen if someone else besides Jim took the amulet. Draal is a very good fighter and has probably been training to be a Trollhunter since Deya (probably even harder when his father was chosen) and even he failed to stop Bular. BULAR. Jim was chosen because he was special and a human which is why I was mad when Jim became troll, it undermines the whole reason why Merlin specifically choosing Jim to be the Trollhunter. So by giving it to Toby, it throws that entire episode in the trash. Merlin chose Jim and Jim specifically.

It doesn’t even matter that Toby is the Trollhunter now because Jim HAS to be the leader no matter what they do. Toby can’t do anything without Jim’s say-so because if anything veers off to the left, it’s over for everyone (tbh, this could be a very cool idea for a bastardization arc for Jim as he keeps getting more and more hungry for control, but that’s not happening).

“The amulet didn’t make me a hero, I already was one” (or I at least I think that’s the quote) just shows that Toby can’t be the Trollhunter. Throughout the entire triology, Toby has accepted his role as a sidekick, he’s never shown interest in being the type of hero that Jim is and has been alright with that. So by forcing him into the hero’s role goes against everything Toby stands for. Hell, AAARRRGGHH!!!’s nickname for him is “wingman”

There’s NO way that my Jim Lake Jr would ever do this. Being the Trollhunter has traumatized Jim and ruined so many parts of his life. If I was Jim, I’d let Toby die his heroic death, being a pawn for Merlin is worse than death anyway.

If they wanted to save Toby, they could’ve just saved him with magic or alien technology bullshit or have him just drive away last minute. Either way, I think killing Toby was the right route. As I mentioned earlier, this would’ve shown more of the ugly side of war and that you can loose anyone at any time. No one has plot armor in real life.

Getting the Krohnisfere was awful too. They got it too easy which is unfortunate because the idea of having to outsmart your enemy instead of just forcefully making your way through is such a scarce thing in action shows. I would honestly pay GOOD MONEY to see this remade and watch how Blinky, Charlemange, Archie, and Claire could think of a way to steal the Krohnisfere from a dude who could see into the future instead of some “Looney Tones bullshit” (my sibling’s words, not mine). In the end, it just felt like it was only there so Archie would be stuck in the trollmarket (which makes no sense). Honestly, I think it would’ve been better if the Krohnisfere was at the bottom of the ocean in like a temple or something or force the gang into combat trials to get it.

Nari. Alright, I’m gonna say it. NARI WAS SO ANNOYING. She couldn’t just TELL Jim “hey, go back like 2/3 months ago and make a better plan.” It would’ve saved us so much trouble. Instead we got “time is like a flower” bullshit that sounds like something that Soren from the Dragon Prince would say when trying to write poetry.

A CANON MPREG. A FUCKING CANON MPREG IN A Y-7 SHOW. It’s disgusting to believe that we have to fight so hard to get just a sliver of gay rep in shows and how hard Nate Stevenson had to work to get Catra and Adora to be able to a gay kiss on screen but a teenage boy kissing his alien girlfriend which resulting in him getting pregnant (without his knowledge or consent might I add) is A-OK. Ever since Steve stopped being a bully the writers have been so bad with him and that makes me sad because Steve is so much fun especially as a CreepSlayer. It just feels like the writers don’t know what to do with him so they took him out of the story in the worst way possible. It had no reason to be there (I think it’s real purpose was just shock value), if they needed to take Steve out of the story, they could’ve had him: spend some time with his family, babysit the kids that Barb and Strickler now have to take care of, send him to therapy to help him get over Lancelot’s death, send him to A-5 to learn about the history/culture because he wants to marry Aja, or HELL send him to college. If kids are going to be confused about anything it’s the fact that a teenage boy got pregnant (once again without his consent/knowledge) because he kissed his alien gf not two people of the same gender kissing. 

(In Red Vs Blue, there IS a mpreg because of an alien and I want to talk about how that differs. Red Vs Blue isn’t a children’s show, the target demographic is for teens-adults and the show has crude humor, it fits in with the show’s established humor VERY well. But TOA’s audience is CHILDREN (literal first graders), the crude humor is usually very cryptic because it’s only there for the adults that are forced to watch the show with their kids can have a laugh. But they outright showed Steve giving birth and it wasn’t even funny, it was so gross. I couldn’t even laugh in shock like I usually do, all I had was a disgusted look on my face.)

To conclude this, I’m going to start gaslighting myself to help forget that the last 10 minutes of the movie and Steve getting pregnant happened. But I really needed to FINALLY just get all my thoughts out there. There were so many good things that happened in the movie but unfortunately, they’ve been outshined by the bad things. Endings are important because not only are they a reward for the audience that have been watching or reading your creation over the years but it also makes-or-breaks any future fans. Therefore because of this, so many potential future fans are never going to watch TOA. 

A year ago, I persistently begged for weeks to get my sibling to just watch the first episode of Trollhunters but now if someone asks me for a recommendation, I’m never going to suggest watching TOA ever again. I’m so mad at this and need to spend A LOT of time on AO3 before I can think properly again. I just needed to get this off of my chest because I can’t keep pulling my sibling away from her life and job or mumble to myself about how angry I am.

[jajanvm-imbi]

Headcanons of Krel living on earth because he’s my favorite and I love him and I haven’t seen anyone do this yet so I feel like I have to

^^^^^because of this very moment I love the idea of Mary and Darci befriending Krel.

Since Aja,Vex and Eli went back to Akaridion-5, Mother was destroyed, and Claire was busy with Trollhunting stuff, earth gets pretty lonely. So Mary and Darci adopt him into their friend group. 

At first Krel was a little apprehensive to joining their friend group, but he quickly warmed up to it because, he, being Krel, loves the attention.

like I can totally see Mary and Darci taking Krel to like a mall or something and doing those like teen romcom movie shopping montages where he goes into a changing room and the girls judge the outfit until they find the perfect one.

I personally believe Krel would adopt a soft boy look, with like oversized button ups and t shirts tucked into jeans, but thats just me.

anyway, because he’s friends with Mary and Darci, Krel has a new found social popularity in Arcadia.

because of this, Krel would prolly get nominated for Spring Fling king and shit

I would say Krel wouldn’t really care about being nominated, but seeing how he cared so much about the science fair and the Battle of the Bands, he would definitely care

Steve is conflicted because he wants to be Spring Fling King, but he can’t mess with Krel like he did with Jim and Eli cause Krel is his girlfriend’s brother 

Krel notices this and takes advantage of it to mess with Steve and actually tries to win.

like Krel would just dominate the contests, and his theme presentation would be the flashiest and most appealing and people would just generally like him, and that would really worry Steve

like Krel, with four arms would be really good at the Touch-a-Truck-athon or whatever its called.

Krel would prolly let Steve win anyway because watching Steve squirm and freak out over prolly losing the crown and not being able to do anything about it cause he's Aja's brother is much better than any highschool dance crown

also the school 100% asks Krel to DJ future dances and events to save money, and Krel absolutely loves it

He would also definitely do the school play. Seeing how much he enjoyed being in Toby and Eli's short film, and again, he loves the attention, he would totally be down 

Also it would just be another chance to mess with Steve to be the lead. 

Because of this, Ms. Janeth would do another Shakespearean play, but do one of those modern renditions. Like it's the same play just in a modern setting, to take advantage of Krel's Akaridion form like they did with Jim's armor. 

If not in the play he would do stage crew/tech.

Like he would create elaborate settings for them using A5 tech and Ms. Janeth would adore it 

moving on, because home life is pretty lonely with just the Lucy and Ricky for company, Krel loves to host his friends for parties and sleepovers and whatever

and since Krel lives in the coolest house on the block, they love coming over

He hosts girl’s night every other week with Mary, Darci, and Clarie (becauuse she deserves a fucking break) 

since we’ve all agreed that Krel is 100% a gaylien, I love the idea that he casually comes out during a girls night

like Mary would be like “So Krel, are there any girls you like?” and Krel’s just like, “*snort* Girls? Who ever said I like girls?” and the others are like “….....?“ and Krel just rolls his eyes and says "I like boys, ladies” and they’re like “ooooohhhh, okay. Cool.”

So now they spend girls night talking about boys. Claire and Darci about their mans and Mary and Krel about cute boys.

One day the girls give Krel a little rainbow pin and Krel’s just like “what’s this?” And the girls tell him that it’s an earth symbol for the gays and he’s like “theres a symbol for that here? I didnt think it was that big of a deal. On A5 it’s pretty normal” and the girls explain why theres a symbol and he’s like “oh shoot wow, thanks" and he put it on his backpack.

He’s pretty confused the first time someone is homophobic towards him cause like that kind if behavior doesnt happen on A5 and hes just like, “why does this bother you? I hardly know you” and just brushes it off. Its doesnt really bother him, mainly cause he doesnt know the earth insults towards gay people so he doesn’t even realize, but if the girls (or Toby, or even Steve, too) catch anyone being homophobic towards their friend they will attack that asshole on sight. Especially Mary and Steve

Random person on the street: Ha, *slur*

Marry: WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HIM BITCH???

Krel: Marry its fine, it’s not that big of a dealoHSEKLOSANDGAYLENMARYGETOFFOFHIM

Marry: SAY IT AGAIN ASSHAT, I D A R E YOU

Claire and Darci: *trying to hold Mary back* maRY NO

Steve: THATS MY NINJA KICKING SPACE ANGEL GIRLFRIEND'S BROTHER BUTTSNACK I'LL END YOU

Toby: *now chasing after Steve to stop him* stEVE NO

Mary would 100% find out who the rando is and destroy their life on social media. Like she would leak their job, phone number, email, school/college (if applicable) to her thousands of followers and absolutely ruin them with no remorse. And honestly, good for her

Also whilst on the subject, Krel can not drive or cook for 2 reasons: 1. Hes gay and 2. He’s a prince so he’s never had to do either before

Like he can obviously do math but that’s it.

Proof? That one scene in Wizards when Douxie had him drive the airship. You know the one.

Coach Lawrence refuses to get in a car with him at Drivers Ed after the 3rd day Krel shows up.

Krel gets addicted to sugary coffee shop-esc drinks thanks to Darci. Not coffee cause we saw in 3Below Part 1 that he doesnt like coffee, but refreshers, coolattas, frappuccinos etc…? Definitely.

As for warm drinks, he’s more of a tea person.

Moving on

He face calls Aja everyday because he really misses her

He tells her all about school and his friends and whatever and Aja tells him about the changes she’s making to the A5 government

Thanks to the wormhole they visit each other often. Sometimes Steve tags along cause he misses his ninja kicking space queen angel girlfriend. (And Eli, but that's also for another post)

They take turns housing Luug.

Krel genuinely loves it on earth, but he hates the primitive technology so he begs Aja to send him supplies and materials for his projects. 

He would 10000% apply to HexTech for an after school job. Seeing his reaction to HT in Wizards and the fact that “Akaridion tech and magic are so compatible”, he would be the perfect addition to the HT staff. 

The Wizards wouldn’t be sure at first but after he shows them A5 tech and Douxie’s email of recommendation about the time loop thing they made together, the wizards are like “oh yeah we definitely keeping this kid. This is going to be so much fun.”

Their inventions become more and more extravagant because Krel can and he's just extra and the wizards love it.

He would definitely find a way to use magic using A5 tech. But he would have to study magic in order to figure out how, so the wizards help him learn all about magic. And since he's learned everything there is to learn about science and technology and whatever, he's super excited to learn about something completely different and interesting. The wizards are happy to teach him. He would be the first Akaridion to learn and use magic

Like he would make his own staff with his serrator and everything. He's like "earn a staff? Nah fuck that going to make my own"

Speaking of which he really likes human swear words. But he doesnt know when it is and isn't inappropriate to say these swear words so he's gotten in trouble a few times for swearing at the wrong time

For example:

Ms. Janeth: excuse me Mr. Tarron?

Krel: what the fuck do you want?

Everyone in the room: krEL NO

Anyway, back to Krel at HT, thanks to Toby, he would definitely have a bowl of candy in his little lab. More like multiple jars of different candy just scattered around the room. Small candy like fun sized chocolate and skittles and jelly beans and whatever

And a mini fridge, of course.

Steve, Toby and Arrrgh come over to the lab alot to mess around.

Toby has a lot of sci-fi requests for Krel to make

Toby: do you think you can make a shrink ray? Laser blasters? Invisible ray? My own hoverboard? My own serrator *gASP* WITH A WARHAMMER SETTING???? WITH SPACE ARMOR TO MATCH???!!!???!

Krel: Toby you already have a warhammer and armor why do you need more?

Toby: I dont have a space warhammer and armor Krel!!!!!!

Going back to school life, I feel like Krel would take an interest in Spanish class. I mean, his human form is latino and in Trollhunters (I'm pretty sure the lightning in a bottle episode) he said "Si" in response to a question someone asked him, so I feel like he would like to learn another human language. 

I also feel like he would just like to learn about Latin American culture in general since Mother gave him that form. He'd like to get in touch with his human self. 

Claire (when she isnt busy Trollhunting with Jim and the gang) is happy help him learn about Latin American culture and help him with his Spanish. 

Krel, being a fast learner, becomes fluent quickly with a perfect accent. 

Señor Uhl, who already liked the Tarrons to begin with, would really appreciate this. 

Claire's dad would also appreciate this.

Since he has such a fascination with human music, Krel would especially love Latin American music. Specifically reggaeton, since its kind of like techno music in a way and he already likes techno music.

And naturally, he learns to dance. All the styles of latin american dances. And he becomes quite the favorite on the dance floor.

He and Claire become great dance partners cause they both have the natural Latino rhythm and because Jim respects and trusts his girlfriend he doesnt mind them dancing together at parties and stuff

Although, Jim does ask for dance help at some point cause it looks like fun and he wants to dance with his beautiful talented incredible amazing gf and Krel is happy to teach him and anyone else who wants dance help. 

GUITAR LESSONS with Douxie cause in 3Below Krel said he really wanted to learn how to play guitar, steals Shannon’s guitar from the bonfire and is seen multiple times strumming it throughout the series. So of course this is included.

Toby introduces Krel to YouTube and Krel instantly makes his own channel.

of course his channel is called DJ Kleb and he posts his tracks and remixes. and maybe even some vlogs

its a little slow at first, only Arcadia Oaks students are subscribed to it but Mary blows it up by posting one of Krel’s tracks on her own social media and now he has thousands of subscribers

he also gained other forms of social media like Instagram and Tiktok, platforms to post his music

At this point every girl in school wants to be friends with Krel but not in the toxic GBF (gay best friend) way, girls just genuinely think he's 10x more interesting than every other boy in Arcadia Oaks

I think that's it for now sorry this is really long I just really love Krel and I had so many ideas. Feel free to add on!!

[thewanderingace]

Hawkeye 1x01 and 1x02 Reactions:

A loooooot of spoilers beyond this point.

A lot.

Beware.

Episode 1:

HERE WE GO!! I’M SO FUCKING HYPED!!

Omg is that Brian Darcy James!!!!

Shit this apartment is huge. They are definitely uber rich. Two floors. In NYC. Damn. Well they kept that fact accurate. Good.

Stark tower!!!

Hawkeye!!!!!!! Aww he saved her life without knowing it.

Omg it's the part where he crashes through the window!! The most badass Hawkeye scene in the Avengers!! I love it!

This title sequence is everything. Look at how badass kate becomes. Looove the aja art

LOL KATE! Can't pick the lock so she scales the building. And then destroys the clock bell tower 😂

JACQUES DUQUESNE!?!!!!!! SWORDS ON THE TABLE!!! FUUUUCK!!  ITS THE SWORDSMAN!!!!

Definitely need to double check Kate's background in the comics. Did she grow up rich??

CLINT!!! MY LOVE!!!!

Omg hes seeing Roger's the musical

This musical is straight up destroying me. This is hysterical. I need the whole album

YAAAAS HIS HEARING AID!!! MCU CANON HOH CLINT!!!!!

Awwww no his face when Nat shows up in the musical.

Lila I love you.

Aww the little girl waving clint dressed up as Nat

Lol at the bathroom scene. Dude read a room.

Oooh babe. How clint kneels on the ground outside to catch his breath

Love how worried lila is for her dad and how smart she is. "We all miss her but she was your best friend"

Aww they all decided to leave early

Dad Clint is everything to me. THEY ARE STILL A HAPPY FAMILY AND I MIGHT CRY

Ooooh the waiter comping his meal and thanking him for saving the city. His face. He feels so guilty still. Oh babe.

Kate looking fine in her tux. Very nice.

LUCKY!!!! ITS LUCKY!!! HI BABY!! THE BESTEST BOY! I definitely squealed at his appearance.

I love Clint and his family. They're all so happy. Hes so happy to be with them. Why isnt Laura with them. Are they still together?

Kate going all super spy lol. Love her. Love it.

Shit what the hell is this auction.

RONIN SWORD!!!

RONIN COSTUME!!!

THE TEACKSUIT MAFIA HAS ARRIVED!!

AHHHHH THE SAID BRO!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHH

THEY KEEP SAYING BRO

IM GONNA DIE

ITS PERFECT

LUCKY!!!! GO LUCKY GO!

Kate saving lucky!

Omg Clints face at seeing the Ronim costume again. Help me

Kate's apartment is perfect

PIZZA! SHE'S GIVING LUCKY PIZZA! LUCKY THE PIZZA DOG HAS ARRIVED! "Oh you like pizza"

Ahhhhh!!!!!!

Oh shit Armand has be murdered. 10,000 dollars it was Jacques

Tracksuit mafia are back!!!!

"BRO! BRO! BRO!" ITS HAPPENING!! THEY DID THE THING!!!

CLIIIIIIINT!!!!!!!!!!!

THEYRE MEETING!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Episode 2

Kate fangirling in front of Hawkeye is perfect. Just babbling and being struck dumb in front of her hero.

Hawkeye being so..."shit" at seeing that it's a kid wearing the suit

Clint being extra vigilant

"Can you sign my bow"

Clint has previous dealings with TSM!

Lol at Kate's reaction to the tracksuit mafia's name

CLINT! BADASS! Catching the cocktail and throwing it back

Clint and Kate's interactions are so perfect I love it

LOL Clint shopping for first aid supplies!

Love Clint slipping into her place dressed as a firefighter

Omfg a larp sticker!? A firefighter is a larger and he stole the suit right!? Right!?

Lol I love that brand of pizza kate is using as an ice pack

Awww Clint teaching her how to take care of her wounds. I love it

Called it! Larper took the suit

Awwww CLINT AND LUCKY BONDING!!!!!

Clint is so good with his kids. And I love that Lila sees through his crap and the Clint is like "I said cooper was in charge but you are amd ways will be". "Dont lose Nate. Where's Nate?"

Ahh Nate knows sign language for his dad!!

Clint better make it home for christmas I swear to God

Lucky and pizza again!!!

Roger's the musical is on the tv!! 😂

"You're not gonna listen to me are you" "I want to but no"

Extra vigilant and protective clint again as he walks Kate to workI love to see it!

Ahhhh she asked about his hearing! Hes walking on right bevause he cant hear otherwise!!! He didnt really answer how ot happened. Just a montage of all his hurts. I liked that but was there an incident!?

Lol the superheroes on the street scene! "You're problem is branding" ppffft!

Aww they exchanged numbers and kate made sure she had his. Lol

Bishop Security!? Damn

Jacques is so slimy. I hate him so much. Get him Kate.

HAHAHAHAHA CLINT AT A LARP EVENT!!! THIS IS EVERYTHING!! THE SWORD FIGHTS WHERE HE LOOKS SO ANNOYED THE WHOLE TIME!! THE DUEL!! I LOVE IT

"I found Thanos"

Aww he made a friend. I like you Grills. He was so excited to beat Hawkeye in battle and that he gets to call him Clint. Adorable

OH THANK FUCK!! Laura and Clint are still together and happy. Jeezus that scared me. God I love her. Shes so happy and supportive and helpful and loving and hes so open and honest with her. I could die of happiness right now.

Oooh hes gonna do a Nat move. Now I wanna cry.

GET HIM KATE!!! KICK HIS ASS! OH SHIT WAIT YOU WON'T BECAUSE HE'S THE FUCKING SWORDSMAN!!! OH SHIT THIS IS SO SEXY AND AMAZING

OH SHIT A BUTTERSCOTCH!! DOES HE KNOW?!!??!

LOL oh that didn't have the "you should have brought more guys. Oh you did" like in the trailer. Still so good. They nailed the TSM

Kate! 😂

"Bro I found her"

ECHO!!! ITS MAYA!!! AHHHHHH

Summary: 

Omg they kept so many comic things I could cry. I really really enjoyed how they wove in comic details into the mcu. It was so good.

Hailee is the perfect Kate

Kate and Clint’s banter is perfect

Lucky is the bestest boy ever and i love him

Clint’s family is so good and i love them all so much. If the show ends with Clint finally retiring and being able to spend Christmas and forever with his family on the farm I can die happy

Speaking of, a “dad weekend in NYC” is ADORABLE

Also I love that Laura and Clint have such a healthy relationship! She’s supportive and loving and understanding. He’s open and honest with her about everything. I love them. SO much.

The Tracksuit Mafia was PERFECT!!!! OMG as soon as they said “bro” i died.

Can’t wait to see if the mcu keeps Clint’s connection with Jacques

Kate’s fangirling was perfect. I love her

The larp!! Clint doing larp!! I LOVED IT!! Just the quiet “I fought Thanos” was hilarious but I also loved how he told Grills he can call him Clint and now they’re friends and it made that guys dad. Love it.

The way the show depicts Clint’s ptsd and survivors guilt was wonderful. It was subtle at times and other times you can really see how much he’s struggling. The zone out when broadway Nat dances, how he had to leave the theater and kneels on the carpet outside, the waiter comping their meal for saving the city, seeing Ronin on the news, using Nat’s plan of “being bait”. 

DEAF CLINT BARTON!!! FINALLY!!! WE FINALLY HAVE DEAF CLINT AND I’M SO HAPPY!!! God it was great! The hearing aid, him turning it off and on, walking on Kate’s right side all the time, the reason for the hearing aids being years of being too close to explosions. Just all of it. LOVE IT

[hotxhocolate]

MY WIZARDS EXPERIENCE

A COMPILATION BC I'M TOO LAZY TO SEPARATE THIS SHIT

P.S. Spoilers(?) Ahead P.P.S. THIS IS REALLY LONG SO HONESTLY DON'T WASTE UR TIME JUST WANT TO GET THIS ALL OUT

Episode 1

Douxie is precious. I'd give my life for him love him.

Archie the little shit. I love him.

THE OPENING SEQUENCE!!! BROOOOO

Jim u unfotunate bb

GIVE JIM A BREAK!!!

Merlin ur so useless sometimes i h8 u

NARI BB I LOVE U I'M ADOPTING U U PRECIOUS CHILD

GIVE DOUXIE AND CLAIRE THE STAFFS THEY DESERVE!!!

THE END CREDITS!!!!!!!!!

Episode 2

FREE JIM!!!

DON'T KILL JIM!!!

SAVE JIM!!!

POWERFUL CLAIRE 😍

GLOWY EYES CLAIRE 😍😍😍

MORGANA I KNOW U TRIED TO KILL MY BABIES IN TROLLHUNTERS BUT I LOVE U UR GORGEOUS

Arthur u suck

... douxie that was yourself

douxie u suck at blending in but i still love u

oh God steve why

u fucking look alike ofc u'd say that

YES FREE JIM!

drunk steve :')))

rapper steve :')))

Merlin during that part when the trolls escape Camelot lol same

POWERFUL CLAIRE!!!

GLOWY EYES CLAIRE!!!!!

trollhunter squad -1 being saved by their enemies lol

Episode 3

I do not like glowy eyes jim

morgana gwen gay

HOLY SHIT POWERFUL CLAIRE 😍

i wanted u two (morgana and claire) to be friends :'(((

HOLY SHIT ARTHUR WAS THE ONE WHO CUT MORGANA'S HAND OFF

AHSAKAJSKAJ MORGANA DEAD???

Episode 4

AGAKAJAAJ BLINKY

NIMUE!!!

TIME TO SEE WHICH NIMUE THEORY IS TRUE

AAARRRGGHH!!!

WITCH CLAIRE! POWERFUL CLAIRE! U AMAZING GIRL I LOVE U! U CAN OPEN THAT SHADOW PORTAL!

TEACHER DOUXIE :')))) I LOVE U

no nimue theory is true (or maybe there's a true theory out there but the ones i have read aren't)

IT'S THE THINGY!!! (and by thingy i'm referring to that netflix screensaver?/sneakpeek?/thingy)

Douxie freeing Nimue and receiving excalibur

Ur an amazing person Douxie and i love u

Jim & Morgana parallel???

OoO IT WAS NARI WHO GAVE MORGANA THE HAND

history's going alright in my pov

Episode 5

MORGANA GETTING HER GOLD ARMOUR GEAR THINGY!!! (me: 😍)

MORE TEACHER DOUXIE HIHI!!!

SHIT CLAIRE GET OUT OF THERE

>:((( merlin listen to them

steve and food hihi (same)

oh God steve

steve calling for eli :'(((

IS CALLISTA GONNA BE DEYA?!!!

CALLISTA DEFINITELY IS DEYA

CLAIRE IS BEING THE AWESOME QUEEN SHE IS AGAIN I LOVE HER

U GO GIRL

creepslayerz :'))) i miss eli

past douxie u dork i love u

Episode 6

AAAAAAAA VENDEL

Jim & Claire reunion 😍

draal i missed u :'(((

TROLL DADS ORIGIN HIHI

IF THEY KILL JIM I SWEAR

THE AMULET OF DAYLIGHT ORIGINS HIHI

where's kanjigar?

decimaar blade >:(((

coach steve HIHIHI i love him

Jim and Claire date hihi they're so soft my bbs

:'((((

jim... claire's always been an awesome wizard

THE AMULET ORIGINS!!!

DOUXIE AND MERLIN WORKING TOGETHER TO CREATE IT :')))

DOUXIE FINALLY GETS THE STAFF HE DESERVES YIEEEEE!!!

CALLISTA TROLLHUNTER!

pre-trollhunters draal >:(((

THE TROLL DADS 🥺

BLINKY U GAY SHIT

ALSO AAARRRGGHH!!! HAD A NOSE RING WHAT A CUTIE

YIEEEEEE CAL IS DEYA I KNEW IT!!!

AJA MENTION!!!

Episode 7

IT'S THE BATTLE OF KILAHEAD!!!

PLS DON'T KILL JIM HUHU

gosh merlin u useless shit douxie's doing all the hard work

DEYA WHERE DAFUQ R U

OH NO LANCELOT

OH NO ARTHUR

OH HE ACTUALLY DIES HERE AND IT'S NOT GONNA MESS WITH TIME ALRIGHT NO PROBLEM

DEYA! TROLLMARKET! WHERE R U

THERE THEY ARE WHAT TOOK YA'LL SO LONG

WHERE'S THE DAYLIGHT ARMOUR???

OH THERE IT IS

DOUXIE TURNING HIS STAFF INTO A GUITAR THE ABSOLUTE CUTIE

don't worry doux i think it's amazing

DOUXIE U DORK I LOVE U

U CAN DEFEAT MORGANA WITH THE POWER OF MUSIC I BELIEVE IN U !!!

DOUXIE AND HIS OBSESSION WITH FIRE HIHI

IT'S THE QUOTE (ALTHOUGH JUST PART OF IT) BUT STILL !!!

IF U THINK I DIDN'T RECITE IT ALONG WITH DEYA

(disappointed she didn't get to say it so i'll say it for her) DON'T THINK !!! BECOME !!!

DEYA MY GURL I'M SO PROUD OF U

I LOVE MY TROLL DADS

JIM PLS DON'T DIE :'(((((

where's steve? where dafuq is steve? did ya'll leave him? HOY DON'T LEAVE HIM

oh jk he's there

hihi past douxie hihi

Episode 8

JIM NO DON'T DIE HUHU

NARI U PRECIOUS CHILD 😍

PROTECC NARI

DOUXIE AND HIS MAGIC GUITAR I LOVE HIM

WTF NO JIM!!! HUHU

NOOOO JIM

AYSJAHSKAHA IT'S KREL HIHI

her name's zoe !!!

soooooo who exactly is zoe

"we're closed to privileged arthurian toolbags" ok i love zoe

wizard underground hihi

HAVE I ALREADY SAID HOW MUCH I LOVE NARI HIHI

WTF DID THEY DO TO JIM GRRR

FREE JIM !!! SAVE JIM !!!

OH NO THEY FUCKING BROKE THE AMULET AGAIN

WHY DOES EVERYONE KEEP BREAKING THE AMULET

WHY DOES IT KEEP FUCKING BREAKING

MORGANA!!!

MORGANA JOINS TEAM GOOD ???!!!

HOLY CRAP WHO DAFUQ IS THE GREEN NIGHT

IS IT ARTHUR? BUT HE'S DEAD ???

PROTECT NARI HIHI I LOVE HER

but gdi merlin

YES!!! SAVE JIM!!!

so ... who is pretending to be nari

is it archie???

yep! it is archie

NARI I LOVE HER

PRECIOUS

gdi merlin we're not leaving without claire and jim

CHANGE JIM BACK FREE JIM SAVE JIM HUHU WTF DID THEY DO TO JIM

fucking shit morgana i want u in team good stop being team bad

IT'S ARTHUR HOLY FUKC

HOLY SHIT MERLIN DEAD ???

i h8 merlin but shit bro why'd u kill him huhu

GLOWY EYES DOUXIE 😍

POWERFUL DOUXIE 😍

GO BOI

MERLIN ALIVE ???

"i'll try to make u proud" "you already have" :'((( no i'm not crying u r

SON???!!! HAHA(?) I KNEW IT???

BUT WHY WOULD CALL UR DAD MASTER??? WHAT KIND OF MESSED UP KINKY SHIT???

Episode 9

hihi past douxie

douxie u cheater

AH JK FATHER FIGURE NOT REAL FATHER alrightz

doux :'((((

i mean i'm not super sad bc i don't really like merlin but still

IS THAT A GOOD MORGANA I SEE hihihi

FREE JIM :'((((

nari i love u

NO JIM'S ALIVE I BELIEVE

noooo don't bake douxie into a blood pie i love him

did charlemagne the devourer just make a pun

charlemagne is archie's dad lol i didn't expect that

charlie

lol this is gonna take a long time

TEAM GOOD MORGANA !!!!!

HIHI MORGANA I'M PROUD OF U

CLAIRE AND MORGANA BFFS lol

BB ARCHIE THAT'S SO CUTE

DOUXIE!!!

THE CLAIRE MORGANA DUO HIHI

Episode 10

Last ep huhu

krel my boi !!!

nari bb :'(((

krel precious

douxie hihi my boi !!! U SMART BOI I LOVE U

YES U ARE STRONG ENOUGH HISIRDOUX CASPERAN I LOVE U

he trapped them in a time loop i love him

douxie and his guitar i love him

NARI HIHI UR SO PRECIOUS I LOVE U

THAT'S MY BOI DOUXIE I LOVE U

OH NO DON'T KILL DOUXIE

DOUXIE PLS DON'T DIE

AHSKAJSKSJA PURPLE EYED CLAIRE OMG GURL I LOVE U

GLOWY EYED PURPLE EYED CLAIRE !!!!

OH NO DID THEY KILL MORGANA

DID MORGANA DIE ?????

OH NO DON'T KILL CLAIRE

CLAIRE PLS DON'T DIE

MORGANA DEAD :'(((

WHY DO THEY KEEP KILLING PPL HUHU

stop it

STOP BREAKING MY HEART

JIM ALIVE!!!!

IT'S MY BLUE EYED BABY BOI

OH NO JIM DEAD :'(((( i'm literally sobbing right now huhu NOOOO

U CAN'T DO THIS WTF HUHU

AHAAJJAJAAJ TEAR!!!

AHSKAJAKAKAKA JIM ALIVE!!!!

JIM HUMAN!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

OH NO DOUXIE NO

DON'T DIE DOUXIE HUHU

YES SAVE DOUXIE!!!! CATCH DOUXIE!!!

OH NO FUCK DOUXIE DEAD TT

DOUXIE ALIVE!!!

or douxie dead??? i'm confused

MHM DOUXIE WHY R U THERE GO BACK TOT THE LAND OF THE LIVING

LOL DOUXIE NOT FOLLOWING MERLIN'S INSTRUCTIONS I LOVE HIM

WTF DOUXIE DEAD???!!! I DISAGREE

YES!!! DOUXIE ALIVE !!!!!!!!!

JIM HUMAN I'M SO HAPPY!!!!

JIM EYEBROW SCAR??? OMG!!!

JIM WIELD EXCALIBUR???

OR NOT???

TALES OF ARCADIA: FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC

no douxie nari don't go away huhu i'm gonna miss u

DOUXIE AND NARI IN A BIG CITY IS THAT NEW YORK OR SMTH

WHERE R THEY???

BUT WBT EXCALIBUR???

AND THE ARCANE ORDER???

SEASON 2???

it's a limited series tho so maybe not huhu

[childofaura]

Hi, what did you think of 3 Below, and were there any character deaths in TOA that felt unnecessary or could’ve been handled better?

Man I almost never get prompts to babble about my favorite things, so anon, let me first say: THANK YOU!

But also let me just say that everything I’m about to lay out is wholly and completely just my opinion, I don’t think of it as fact but I do feel very strongly towards it. I’mma put everything in a Read More because I’m about to excavate a whole damn site:

So one: If we’re being completely honest, I thought 3Below was the weakest of the ToA series. It’s not to say that it didn’t have things I enjoyed about it, but it was a very disappointing series to follow up Trollhunters, mainly because:

1. The two main characters were harder to connect with. Krell didn’t get to make any significant connections with people on Earth the way Aja did with Steve (And I’m not saying it had to be romantic, but I’d have liked it if Krell made a close friend or something), and Aja was very unpleasant sometimes but the show tries to make her seem like she’s in the right. Like the episode where Steve rightfully expressed his relationship concerns that he doesn’t get to have a calm, chill date with Aja where nothing crazy or life-threatening happens, and Aja just snaps at him, like... What? That’s messed up, girl.

2. The show very ham-fistedly tried to push political issues into the show, like making Aja and Krell an allegory for illegal immigrants, which made the writing suffer because there was a LOT of issues with character depth/development, plot holes, and just a weak story overall.

3. Those above mentioned characters not getting development: Morando is a flimsy villain whose kill count is grossly inconsistent, Tronos was a great-potential antagonist/possible protagonist who was essentially used by Aja the same way he was used by Aja’s parents (whom he had a grudge against), General Kubritz was a shallow one-dimensional villain with weak motives whose only purpose was to be a sockpuppet for the aforementioned hamfisted politics, Zadra (don’t know if I spelled it right) is an underdeveloped ally who rags on Aja about being cautious in battle, yadda yadda, then gets two-shotted by Alpha in such a goofy way, and then Beta and Omega Zeron also had some potential but got lost. I think the most interesting character on the show was Alpha, and he got killed off WAY too early into the story for it to feel like Vex earned that kill. Especially because it felt like without Alpha, the show was trying to shoehorn in other villains in his place to be obstacles for the siblings. Kubritz had only one episode in the first season with no personality, but with Alpha’s death suddenly she’s playing a bigger role. The Foo Foo bots were never shown to be a race (only an individual) until Season 2, where all of a sudden they become good guys?

4. The parents’ sole purpose of simply being a plot-vehicle. There’s the risk that jumping into and interfering with their parents’ memories could essentially give them brain damage, yet halfway through the episode they say “Fuck it” and go ballistic through the memories. This is shown to have absolutely no consequences later on, as the parents are revived just fine only for them to immediately die again. The weapon should have just operated on a regular core instead of needing a royal core, so then the dilemma of “Do we sacrifice someone for the greater good or keep our morals” is the dilemma in place (where I think Vex would have been perfect for sacrificing himself and giving him a good character death).

I could go on and on but I don’t want it to seem like this is just 3Below roasting hour. Long story short it was a flop to me.

ANYWAYS,

All the character deaths that were unnecessary or that I would change? Hoo boy I got a list!

1. Draal in TrollHunters. Now I swear this isn’t a case of “I love this character the most, therefore his death should have never happened” kind of thing. But with all things considered on how the show kind of mistreats Draal: He’s supposed to be a crazy-strong powerhouse, but he’s constantly getting the crap beaten out of him for plot purposes, once he’s dead Jim just kind of... forgets about him until he kills Gunmar and has a very forced feeling “That was for Draal” line, and in Wizards we see him alive in the past but JIM NEVER INTERACTS WITH HIM. YOU’D THINK SEEING YOUR BEST FRIEND ALIVE AND WELL WOULD HAVE SOME KIND OF EMOTIONAL IMPACT ON YOU BUT IT DOESN’T. If I’d at least change something about his death, I’d have made it so that he doesn’t die RIGHT when Jim gets him back. That’s too soon. Maybe have him die in the final battle.

2. Alpha in 3Below. Like I said before, he died WAY TOO EARLY ON in Season 2, literally in the second episode. This is a villain who should have lived way longer, like literally every second that he’s still alive just pisses Vex off. Make him escape for a few episodes, ramp up that drive for Vex to kill him so that in the final few episodes the pay-off actually FEELS earned. Especially because the way he died was so cheap; Vex was getting his shit kicked in by Alpha during that fight, and maybe got like... what, one or two hits in before actually landing a very weak killing blow? Vex, the character who embodies a lack of patience, lack of peace of mind, and lack of caution the most out of anyone in 3Below, suddenly pulls a “inner peace” moment to stab Alpha? It’s weak.

3. Tronos in 3Below. Tronos’ death was so cheaply written. Again, Tronos has beef with Aja’s parents. Aja swears up and down that she’s not like them and would make things right by Tronos. Tronos says, “Cool” and suddenly helps them because plot. Tronos gets left behind and probably is feeling even MORE bitter because he just got used the same way as before. Morando comes down to Earth and finds Tronos, who literally the first thing he does upon seeing Morando is drop to the ground in what is seen as the first act of loyalty from his character. Morando’s response? “Lolnope” and stabs him. Tronos deserved to die bitterly fighting against the royal siblings on Morando’s team towards the final fight, not get offed almost immediately after a redemption.

4. Kubritz.

Again, Kubritz’s character was used as a dirty trick to push a political agenda. She has no real or deep reason for hating aliens, she just does. But for some reason she’ll work with an alien (and an even worse alien at that) to get rid of aliens? And suddenly after she essentially gets socially cancelled in the middle of Arcadia park, she becomes good and sacrifices herself?

I’ve had a whole personal rewrite of Kubritz’s character that I felt would have been better and would have given her more depth: Kubritz has a father who worked in the Arcadia Observatory as an astronomical scientist, but when not at work he conducts experiments at home obsessed with contacting alien life in space, and enthusiastically involves Kubritz in his work; Kubritz as a child loves her dad and is just as engrossed in his home experiments as he is; however one of the transmission messages they send out brings an alien ship to their house, and abducts her dad; little Kubritz witnesses this, loses her dad to an abduction, and the hate of aliens manifests there. The whole plot twist is that the aliens that abduct Mr. Kubritz weren’t hostile, but picked him up because the contact transmission he sends out accidentally reads as an SOS signal, and Mr. Kubritz returns to Earth sometime towards the final battle and this gives Kubritz the strength to switch to the protagonists’ side.

So essentially, Kubritz shouldn’t have died, but should have been re-written as a whole.

5. Galahad in Wizards.

YOU TELL ME. YOU HAVE A CHARACTER. VOICED BY JOHN RHYS-DAVIES. AND YOU DON’T EVEN USE HIM PROPERLY OR LET HIM LIVE LONG ENOUGH TO GET A PERSONALITY OUT OF HIM. Literally he dies in like... episode 1 or 2, and Merlin calls him an old friend. But then you see absolutely nothing in his past that even suggests that? Out of all the deaths on here, homeboy should have not died at all. Galahad should have gone with Douxie to the past, where (once Merlin finds out they’re all from the future) he tries to persuade Merlin that Douxie’s become a fine capable young wizard, and he should trust him more.

That’s pretty much all my thoughts on everything, thank you Anon for giving me the opportunity to nerd out over it!

[jalanjauh]

blabber: acceptance

sebelumnya aku gak tau gimana ngepost di Tumblr yg bener soalnya pas pencet button 'write' gak ada opsi jenis atau bentuk tulisan kayak dulu. kalo dulu kan ada pilihan kayak as article, conversation, quote etc. tapi sekarang gak ada. pencet, ya udah nongolnya ini. white blank space bahkan gak ada section buat title-nya :( jadi gak satisfying. hhhh ya udahlah, skip soalnya disini nggak mau ngomentarin 'perubahan' Tumblr tapi aku mau, sesuai judul, blabbering alias ngoceh aja. huft sebenernya lowkey ngeluh dengan sedikit bumbu self realization jadi ngeluhnya bakal (kayaknya) sedikit berbobot.

jadi kemarin-kemarin ini, means sampe sekarang masih, aku lagi di-state hilang arah. kata temenku yg lebih gede, ini yang namanya quarter life crisis alias problem umum mereka yang 20an terutama middle 20. huffttt aku kira aku udah ngalamin quarter crisis ini pas awal lulus kuliah, taunya berkepanjangan :" alias semakin nambah umur makin banyak crisis-nya and i think this time, the crisis already overflowing. kayak jadi banyak yang bikin tertekan dan ketakutan. apalagi kalo liat LinkedIn (akhir2 ini aku emang lagi sering buka LinkedIn, biasa nyari kerjaan), beuh, pingin aku capslock-in di profil relations ku, DAH PADA JADI ORANG Y LU PADA' hhhhh :( ya walaupun nggak mentereng banget tapi profilnya pada bagus. jenjang kerjanya jelas, terarah, kayak rapi aja gitu. meanwhile aku, dari start experience aja udah nggak appealing. kerja juga seringnya part time atau freelance. itu pun bukan di bidang yang krusial but i swear by God, i never slacking off. biar part timer tapi aku selalu manage untuk ngembangin diriku entah lewat apapun itu karena aku mikir, kalo bukan aku, siapa yang mau ngembangin aku? tempat kerja aku? boro-boro, mereka aja ngegajinya masih pake itungan jam padahal beban kerja udah ngalahin yang full time :( realita kerja di indo tuh gini. beban kerja >>>>>> apresiasi dan ini bikin sedih.

dulu pas awal lulus, tentu aja aku ambis. pengen kerja di tempat bagus, jam kerja jelas, salary menjanjinkan, ada jenjang karir, pokoknya everyone's dream job deh tapiiii balik lagi, realita kerja di indo tuh gini. kamu yang butuh ya kamu yang ngalah alias jiwa2 ambis yang kata Bung Karno bisa mengguncang dunia itu 'dipaksa' realistis instead idealis. sedih. jadi ya udah, lahir lah aku yang profesional part timer gini yang sering nggak merasa attach sama tempat kerja. jadi sering ngerasin urgensi buat keluar, pindah, nyari sesuatu yang lebih baik yang sebenarnya entah yang lebih baik itu ada apa nggak. sedih banget. sediiiihhh banget.

rasanya kayak mencurangi diri sendiri, terus-terusan ngerasa bersalah dan kasihan sama diri sendiri cs aku pribadi ngerasa i deserve more than this tapi gak tau, seiring berjalannya waktu dan seiring menjadi realistis itu, aku jadi kayak kehilangan waktu dan value.... kayak aku udah terlanjur nyebur di bidang ini, jadi part timer annually jadi ketika ngelamar kerja, mau aku memperbagus cv ku kayak apapun, aku bakal selalu punya pikiran gini:

ini bakal menarik para hr itu nggak sih? aku udah nggak fresh graduate tapi kenapa gak ada posisi yang mentereng di cv ku? hr pasti bakal sangsi sama aku.

apalagi ngeliat profil relations yang 'seenggaknya' keliatan lebih rapi dan settle dari aku :( itu sedih banget. banget. banget. mau nyalahin keadaan juga gimana? nggak bisa kan :(

but sike, sebenernya aku nyalahin keadaan. kayak, kenapa aku dulu nggak punya uang tabungan? jadi kalo wawancara ke jakarta bisa punya modal. atau, kenapa dulu aku mutusin pulang ke rumah yang literally ada di kabupaten. pelosok dan hampir nggak dikenal? banyak banget hal yang aku point out dan kambing hitamkan. pokoknya aku ini penuh sama what if's dan penyesalan2. aku se-nggak bagus itu dalemnya til the time, kemarin malem temenku ngirim chat. sederhana aja dan no context sebenernya tapi benar2 hit my core.

dia udah dewasa bgt

nggak ngoyo orangnya (then everything seems running well for her)

sementara aku, masih banyak penyakit hati

semoga aku bisa berubah ya :""(

dah gitu doang. awalnya juga gak jelas ngobrolin apaan tapi that 'aku banyak penyakit hati', really hit me. then aku keinget omongan orang2 soal acceptance. you can't really being happy, loving yourself if you're lack of acceptance. acceptance is the key of everything.

dang, aku benci banget konsep let something go or accepting something as it is or the power of now, i do really hate them karena aku ngerasa keadaan aku sekarang ini gak fair. gak bagus makanya gak layak untuk 'dimaklumi'. but then, lagi-lagi penyakit hati, huft.... kayaknya aku ini emang penuh penyakit hati. that's manifested too much til i become this kind of person: sering nyari kambing hitam dan terjebak sama masa lalu. intinya gak bersyukur. padahal tanpa aku sadari, orang yang gak bisa bersyukur adalah orang yang paling susah dibikin bahagia. they're hard to be pleased and unfortunately, i am them :(

makanya, setelah semalem nangis, tadi siang nangis, akhirnya aku mau pelan-pelan ngelakuin ini: menerima. menerima kalo aku emang masih part timer. menerima kalo aku belum pernah kerja di kantor; dengan jam kerja settle, gaji settle and everything settle di usia segini. menerima kalo usaha2ku (yg honestly setengah mati itu: ikut webinar, les, ngeluangin waktu belajar otodidak) dianggap b aja bahkan ga ada nilainya di mata rekruiter. maybe they just snapped and passed it. menerima juga kalo aku memang masih di-state yang menurutku nggak membanggakan. hilang. gak jadi apa-apa. menerima semua hal yang berlabel kurang itu. selain itu, aku juga mau belajar buat menanamkan prinsip ini lebih kuat:

dunia itu jahat tapi Tuhan baik. bahkan masih dikasih kesempatan buat hidup dan berusaha gini, bisa disebut keberuntungan. God's grace.

jadi ya nerima, accept all the shades of me tapi juga nggak menyerah untuk terus berusaha. karena aku udah pernah direbut idealisme nya, jadi akan aku kembaliin pelan-pelan. Ini bukan toxic positivity tapi aku percaya kalo Tuhan nggak akan mengingkari janjiNya. something best is about to come, i just need to wait lil longer. terus terakhir, berharap yang tadinya i am them berubah jadi i was them.

[artificialqueens]

heavy is the head (1/10) (sashea) - shadysalad

an - found this completed multichap in my drafts (!!!!!) i wrote it in about november and completely forgot about it oops😬. anyways, i’ll post a new chapter every couple of days even if no one likes it cos I just can’t bring myself to leave 10 chapters sitting here. not my best work, got to admit, but when is it ever huh? enjoy :)

“Thanks Pep, I’ll see you in a bit.” Shea waved at her maid before softly closing the door, skipping down the long corridor. It was a Sunday, which meant breakfast with her parents in the great hall. She hoped the Commander of the Royal Guard, Alexis, had done as she’d asked with regards to the stationing of certain guards.

She stood at the door to the great hall, knocking twice. Pulling her robe around her a little tighter, she pushed the door open. Her mother looked up first. “Good morning, darling, have you had a nice week?”

It took a minute for Shea to respond; her eyes fell past her mother to the pair of guards stood behind the table. Aja was there, as usual, but she breathed a sigh of relief when she saw Nina had been replaced. And not with any old guard; with Sasha. Damn, Alexis was good. Shea flashed a beaming smile to the woman, who returned a small smirk of her own. “Um.. yes, thank you, mother.”

Shea swiftly made her way around the long table, dropping a kiss on each of her parent’s cheeks, seating herself at the opposite end of the table to them. Her father cleared his throat, eyes still on the plate of French pastries in front of him. “We need to discuss your coronation dress, dear. Any thoughts as to the colour?”

Shea groaned internally; everything was about her coronation these days. She locked eyes with Sasha and rolled her eyes exaggeratedly. Sasha let out a small giggle. “Not particularly. Are you sure it can’t just be black?”

“Oh, of course not, darling! Black is the colour of mourning! How about a lovely crimson, or ultramarine, perhaps?” Shea watched as Aja’s eyes disappeared into the back of her head, and wished she could get away with the same a second time. She hummed lowly in lieu of a response and sunk her knife into the croissant that had been placed before her.

“Honey, your mother and I have been thinking…” Shea whipped her head up at the sound of her father’s voice. “We think you should take some etiquette lessons before your coronation, just so you will be prepared for life as Queen and so we can do away with…” He gestured vaguely towards Shea, who had frozen with the croissant hanging out of her mouth and flakes falling into her lap. “…this.”

She was quick to deposit the croissant back on the plate and brush herself off. “Are you sure that’s necessary? I mean, I can be prim and proper, I just choose not to.”

Her mother grimaced. “Yes, we think so. Your first lesson is at 2, in the ballroom. Your instructor’s name is Trinity. Don’t forget that: Tri-ni-ty.” Her mother sounded it out as if Shea was a child, like Trinity was a difficult name to remember. Shea nodded, stuffing her face with the last of the croissant and standing from her chair. That was enough family time for the day.

Shea waved to Sasha and Aja and left the room, foregoing her usual route to the gardens and making her way to the extensive library. She usually loved spending her days in the gardens, but not when it was pouring down with Autumn rain and freezing cold. If she didn’t go in the garden, she probably wouldn’t ever see outside the palace, except from the occasional state visit. The only upside to being Queen, she supposed, was the fact that she would be leaving the palace a lot more.

The library was cosy and warm, a log fire already blazing in the hearth. Shea made her way over to her little corner, where books of all genres were still strewn around and fluffy blankets shrouded a soft velvet sofa. It was a little colder over there, but Shea would rather that than be eventually stifled by the direct heat from the fire, where the rest of the furniture was set up.

She picked up Pride and Prejudice, continuing from where she left off. As she read on, she thought of Sasha. It was the type of book she would like, all old-timey and smart. She began to lose interest, her mind wandering further and further away from the adventures of Elizabeth Bennet. After a good while only pretending to read, she decided there was no point in fooling herself. She went looking for Sasha, grabbing the book as an afterthought.

Instead of blindly searching the whole castle, Shea made a beeline to Alexis’ office. She always knew where everyone in the whole palace was at all times; that was her job. “Hey Alexis!”

Alexis looked up from the paperwork on her desk. “Sasha?”

Shea nodded shyly. “You know me too well, girl. Thanks for moving Nina, too. That bitch, I swear to the gay gods.” She gasped softly, a smirk settling itself on her lips. “Hey, since you have the power to move people, do you have the power to fire them too?”

Alexis chuckled a little, turning her attention back to the pay receipts in front of her. “Get out of here, Shea. Sasha’s down by the kitchens.”

Shea skipped out of the office and sprinted down 4 floors. She slowed to a fast walk as she descended the last flight of stairs to catch her breath, running a hand through her hair. She spotted the bald girl underneath the giant mural at the end of the corridor, and broke out into a run again. “Sashaaa!”

“Sheaaa!” Just as Shea reached her, Sasha pulled her into a hug. “What’s this?” She gestured to the book that Shea has all but forgotten she was holding.

“Oh! I was reading this and I thought you might like it, so I brought it for you to take back to your room tonight.” Sasha turned the book over in her hands a few times before placing it on the sideboard next to her, smiling widely as a thanks.

Sasha bit her lip, eyes roaming around the hallway. “So… queen lessons, huh?”

“I know. I’m not that uneloquent, am I? I mean-”

Sasha interrupted with a giggle. “Hate to be that person, but before you go any further I feel like I should point out that it’s ‘ineloquent’.”

Shea groaned exaggeratedly. “Fuck! Maybe I do need etiquette lessons. But- ugh! It’ll be so boring!”

“Yes, preparing to become one of the most powerful and most respected rulers in the world must be so tedious.” Sasha deadpanned.

“Shut up, Sash. I’m sure Alexis has you in some of them. You’ll be able to see for yourself. I just hope this Trinity girl is nice.” Shea mused.

“Yeah, I’m stationed in the ballroom today. Isn’t that where your mom said it would be?” Shea nodded thoughtfully.

“Ok, well, I have, like, half an hour? So I’ll see you in a bit.” Shea pulled Sasha in for one last hug, before setting off down the corridor. Just before she went to climb the staircase, she turned back, yelling over her shoulder, “Hope you enjoy the book!”

[ineffable-bookworm]

Good Omens Fic Recs: Pre-TV Classics Masterlist

The Good Omens fandom has been around for 30 years. While it was quite small, many of the fanfics it generated were of remarkably high quality. With all the new fics being written since the show came out, I thought I’d take a moment to write about my favourite pre-tv show fics, because I’ve been waiting for chance to do this, and I think theses fics and their authors deserve some more recognition

Ordinary People by Daegaer

Human AU. Lonely, repressed Ezra hires Tony to repaint his bookshop.

I love this one SO MUCH!!! This fic is always the first one I think of when asked for a favourite (followed by The Walls, the Wainscot and the Mouse).

I read this fic every couple of years, and I relate to Ezra more than I care to admit. His defensive, procrasctinating, and self-sabotaging thought processes, and the fact that he’s already thinking of ways to say no to a shot at happiness because he can’t stand the thought of being rejected, all of this just hit a nerve with me because I’ve done the exact same thing. So many times. Ezra is so like me it’s painful.

Fave quote: “Take a chance, Ezra. It might make you happy” (This line gives me life! I swear, I fall in love with Tony every time I read this bit)

This is a human AU fic, so if you’re not into that, may I recommend that you read ...

Anything but Ordinary (Ordinary People Remix) by Cimorene

This Ordinary People but without the human AU

Written from Crowley’s POV. After the Armageddidn’t, Crowley is spending so much time in Aziraphale’s bookshop, people mistake for being one of the owners. Annoyed, Crowley thinks that if people are going to think this, then the bookshop needs a new paint job to suit his style.

A Better Place and The Walls, Wainscot and the Mouse by @irisbleufic

Domestic fluff fics about Crowley and Aziraphale new life sharing a cottage on the South Downs (I will be eternally grateful to irisbleufic for asking this question and to Neil Gaiman for giving this answer)

Now part of the massive 200,000+ word Crown of Thorns ‘verse, I read these two fics when they were still stand-alone stories and absolutely love the domestic fluff. I read these fics whenever I want to slow down and feel warm and fuzzy. I’ve also read a bit of the CoT verse, which is a bit darker than the two chapters i just recced (I’ll always prefer fluff over angst). However, all of irisbleufic’s other works are beautifully written and extremely thoughtful, so I’m definitely going back for a second attempt!

Other fics by the same author that I highly recommend are Regulars (how other people see Crowley and Az) and Creature Comforts (from the CoT ‘verse, contains my absolute favourite headcanon, beachcomber!crowley)

Be Ye Therefore Merciful by AmberDiceless

Crowley saves Aziraphale from being shot in the Middle East. However, the bullets are laced with Holy Water, so Aziraphale faces down Death himself so keep him from taking Crowley

Written all the way back in 2005, it’s kind of hilarious that it predicted tv!crowley’s tendency to save tv!aziraphale. Can be read as platonic or pre-relationship

I love this fic for Aziraphale’s characterisation. book!Az is as polite as tv!Az, but he is by no means a fool and can be quietly stubborn, and downright rebellious when he needs to be. This fic really shows off this side of his character nicely

A Precise and Accurate History of Monday, 11 years Later by Giddy Geek

A straight-up sequel to the book that mimics Pratchett/Gaiman’s style very well. Az and Crowley move to America to take a break after the Apocalypse, and slowly let themselves fall in love. When they return to Lower Tadfield to visit their godson 11 years later, they learn what free will is all about

I think I have a thing for pining and unresolved romantic tension tropes. Again it’s the last act of the fic that I love the most. The tension between Az and Crowley, as well as Az’s uncertainty about their relationship after certain revelations are made is heartbreaking and beautifully written

Manchester Lost by moczo (aka Aisene on ao3)

This fic is funny! Basically a sequel to the book, with Hell deciding to have another go at the Apocalypse

Gabriel, Michael, Uriel, and Raphael are main characters, with Raphael being Aziraphale’s adoptive father. It’s because of this fic that I’m not that into the Raphael!crowley headcanons that have popped up of late. It’s a great theory and really fun to read the meta about, but Aziraphale and Raphael’s relationship in this fic is so cute that I’m rather attached to it

Bear in mind that this fic was written in 2009, when Glee was huge and Don’t Stop Believing was making a comeback. I’m currently re-reading this fic, and while it’s still funny, the pop-cultural references are a bit out-of-date. Gabriel, Michael and Uriel are also completely different characters to what they are on the show

All in all, it’s a funny, light little fic that doesn’t take itself seriously and is a great antidote to anyone who has decided to read The Sacred and the Profane (trigger warning on TSatP, it is a dark!fic and there is no happy ending. It’s basically Good Omens’ equivalent of Grave of Fireflies)

Falling Rain by aria

Aziraphale and Crowley survive the Great Flood by hiding out on Noah’s Ark. Pre-Arrangement, this fic is written more from Crowley’s POV and explores his confusion as to why this silly little angel hasn’t killed him yet

One of the first fics I ever read, when the Noah’s Ark scene popped up in the the tv show, I yelled out “I’ve read that fic!”

Everything That Rises Must Converge by aja

Cute little fic (it’s only 1389 words) about Az and Crowley trying to sit on fences and meeting in the middle

To be honest, the only reason I’m reccing this fic is for the absolutely inspired joke about the rabbi in the footnotes

Traditions by UseTheForceEm (NSFW)

SMUT WARNING (but boy is it good smut)

Crowley gets drunk after Hell gives him a birthday as reward for the Spanish Inquisition. One thing leads to another and he and Aziraphale have sex. They then decide to make this a yearly birthday tradition.

How is it possible for two characters to have so much sexual tension while actually having sex? Is there such a thing as URT (Unresolved Romantic Tension)? This fic answers those questions.

Why do I love this fic? Because it’s hot 😂 While most of the smut is in the first chapter, it’s the epilogue in the 2nd chapter that I re-read the most. The tension between the two is almost painful, and it’s fascinating to watch them dance around each other.

The Internal Rhyme Series by Quantum_Witch and Vulgarweed, art by Quantum_ Witch (NSFW)

This series follows Az and Crowley throughout history. UST and smut ensues

Amid the Sacred Wreck is set during 794 AD. Crowley is masquerading as a Viking who raids a monastery where Aziraphale is monk (NSFW)

Breathless Mouths May Summon is set during the Crusades. Insanely hot smut happens in the second chapter. Contains the, frankly, amazing line “Ride me as if all the spirits of the Underworld were behind you,” (obviously NSFW)

The Phoenix and the Turtle (A Metaphysical Romance) is set during Elizabethan times. I actually can’t remember what happens in this part but thought I’d add it for the sake of completion

Living Arrangements by Afrai (who also wrote The Sacred and the Profane)

Heaven turns Aziraphale into a human as punishment for preventing Armegeddon. It isn’t until the end that Crowley realises that he was punished as well

This fic is one of Afrai’s lesser known works. Personally, I prefer this one to TSatP. It had me sobbing at the end in a way TSatP never did

[akozuheiwa]

Whumptober Day 4: Pinned Down

Still out of order. Oh well.

Summary: Krel must make a quick decision during a cave-in.

Trigger Warnings: loss of limb

Krel, personally, thinks there isn’t going to be anything interesting in these caves outside Arcadia, and if there is, it’s a trap. Sure, he’s curious about the weird energy signal Mother picked up, but not curious enough to risk his life over it. Yet. But Aja if nothing if not determined, so here they are, deep in a cave looking for an energy disturbance that Krel isn’t convinced isn’t a glitch in Mother’s system. 

“Lively,” says Aja, tracing a hand over the wall of the cave.

“It’s a bunch of rocks,” says Krel flatly.

The cave is only dimly lit by their glows, casting eerie blue light over the rocks. Krel wishes they brought another light source, instead of just themselves and their serrators. He has a secton more to think that they could be snuck up on before – to no one’s surprise – there’s an explosion. Krel blacks out for a secton – maybe two – maybe longer. His head pounds; something warm and wet slips down the side of his face, and he wipes it away with a hand. Ah. Blood. Right. He tries to push himself up. Agony flares from his right leg, and he bites back a cry.

He finally manages to push himself onto his elbows. His leg is trapped under a pile of rocks. There’s no way he’s going to be able to dig it out on his own.

“Aja?” he calls, coughing weakly in the dusty air.

“Little brother!” she calls back. A few moments later, she is kneeling by his side. “Oh, no. No, no – okay, we’re going to get you out of here.”

She starts trying to tug away rocks, but before she can make any leeway, something grabs her arm and yanks her away.

“Aja!” Krel yelps in alarm. The life-form – a bounty hunter for sure – looms over him threateningly, glowing sword posed. Krel manages to grab his serrator and throw up a shield just in time to stop himself from getting skewered.

Aja yells angrily and runs forward to engage the bounty hunter. Krel starts tugging rocks away, but he’s not going quickly enough. He’s never going to be able to do this. His head hurts and his leg is starting to go numb.

He twists to watch Aja and the bounty hunter fight. The back and forth makes him dizzy, but some level of pride sparks in his core as Aja holds her own. She manages to flip the bounty hunter and throw them off, then runs to Krel and desperately starts pushing rocks away.

The bounty hunter pushes themselves to their feet and snarls. They pull out a gun – Krel is too disoriented to know where they got it – and aimed it at the ceiling above them. More rocks start coming down around them. Aja throws her shield up, but the whole cave is coming down, so it isn’t going to be enough. They need to get out of here.

“Kleb,” mutters Aja, voice strained with the effort of protecting them.

“You need to go,” Krel says.

“I’m not leaving you!” she snaps.

Krel swallows. He gets it. He’d never leave Aja, if their positions were switched, although if their positions were switched they’d probably both be dead by now. The bounty hunter has already left – clearly they don’t expect them to escape this. A large boulder comes down hard beside them. They’re out of time. He glances at his trapped leg and closes his eyes.

“I have an idea,” he says. It’s a bad idea. A very bad idea. But it is, at least, an idea.

“What is it?” she asks.

“Would you be able to carry me?” he asks, even though he knows she can.

“Yes,” she says. “But we’ll never be able to dig you out in time!”

He swallows. “Just don’t overreact.”

He activates his serrator-sword. Aja’s brow furrows, but Krel doesn’t give her time to put together his plan. He braces himself, and brings the serrator down on his leg, just above the rocks. He bites down hard and tries not to scream. Aja gasps and covers her mouth in horror.

“Krel,” she manages. Krel opens his mouth to tell her they need to go, but what slips out is a strangled cry as pain shoots up from the new wound. Aja shakes her head and picks him up with three arms, using her last to keep the shield above them. He does his best to stay conscious, even as his vision blurs and agony flares from – well, what’s left of his leg.

He fails.

—

When Krel wakes up, he’s in his bed at home. At first, he’s – not entirely sure what happened. He sits up and rubs his head, then groggily gets out of bed. Except, a second later, he crashes to the floor, because where his right foot should have hit the ground nothing did. He grasps at the bandaged stump in panic before remembering. The cave. The bounty hunter. The cave in, his – stupid plan. He didn’t think it through at all.

Aja bursts into the room and kneels beside him.

“Careful,” she says. She helps him up on the bed. “How are you feeling?”

“Fine,” he says.

She raises an eyebrow. “How are you actually feeling?”

Krel rests a hand on his leg – the one that’s only half there now. “It’s going to take some getting used to.”

“That was a stupid idea,” she says. “How could you think – we could have gotten out of there.”

“No, we couldn’t have,” Krel says.

“I would have gotten us out!” she exclaims. “In one piece!”

Krel knows better. For a secton, he swears he can feel his leg still there. It hurts in more ways than one. He rubs the stump gingerly.

“I’m okay,” he says. “I’ll make a cool prothesis.”

“You should have let me get us out of there,” she says.

He curls his arms around his torso. “There was no time, okay? It was that or we both died.”

“There was so much blood,” Aja murmurs. The distress in her eyes hurts more than the soreness in his leg. “I thought – I thought I was going to lose you.”

“You know I wouldn’t do that to you,” he says.

Her expression hardens. “You told me to leave you.”

He flinches. “Well. Yes. I did.”

“How could you tell me to leave you?” she demands. To his alarm, tears well in her eyes. “How could you think I’d possibly – I’d ever–”

“The whole place was coming down on us,” Krel says. “I was trapped. You weren’t.”

“You’re my little brother.” She grabs his shoulders, face twisting in distress. “You have to know I’d never leave you.”

“I – do know,” he says. He looks away. “But someone needs to be alive to be heir. And – well – you’d be better at it than me.”

“That’s not true.”

“It is true,” Krel shoots back. “Even Mama and Papa know it. Look, I know I’m smart, but I’m not – I’d never make a good king. You’d make a great queen. And – even if none of that was true, I’d still choose your life over mine any day.”

“You would make an amazing king someday, Krel,” Aja says seriously. “And Mama and Papa know that too. You have to believe that.”

Krel swallows, surprised and annoyed to find a lump in his throat and his eyes burning. He wipes them angrily. Aja pulls him into a hug. He wants to believe her – but he remembers how frustrated Papa always got with him, how Mama never corrected him when he told he he’d be a scientist when he grew up, not a king, never a king. Mama and Papa love him. He knows that. But they knew he wasn’t destined for the same greatness as Aja.

Aja pulls away, searching his eyes. “You don’t believe me.”

“I…” he trails off. He doesn’t want to lie to Aja. He lowers his eyes, refusing to make eye contact with her.

Aja hugs him again. “Then I’ll keep telling you until you do.”

“Okay,” he says softly.

“I love you, little brother,” she murmurs.

He tightens his grip and closes his eyes. “I love you too.”

[mbiedebby]

Sedih itu adalah definisi saat aku denger @twindyrarasati positif COVID-19, disini aku mau menceritakan sedikit kenapa aku begitu sangat menjadikan seorang @twindyrarasati adalah panutan terbaik yang pernah ada selama beberapa taun terakhir ini. Dia adalah orang yang selalu ngasih inspirasi untuk terus berkarya, belajar tentang banyak hal, dan melakukan banyak hal positif dari mulai fotografi, Sinematografi, Nulis, dan mungkin cara menikmati hidup. Aku introvert parah, sebelumnya aku gapunya temen dan memiliki masalah dalam berkomunikasi hingga mengalami kesulitan saat bersosalisasi terutama sama orang baru. Tapi setelah tahu bahwa dia juga seorang introvert yang bisa menyentuh dunia luar. Akhirnya aku juga bisa melakukan hal yang sama seperti yang dia lakukan. Aku bisa menjadi yang lebih baik dari sebelumnya. I swear, i love my life right now 😊 "Ya, dia yang terbaik dibanding figur lainnya ditanah air ini." Fikirku begitu. Oke, mungkin ini adalah sebuah pengakuan yang mungkin gapernah aku tunjukan bahwa aku kagum. Sejak kenal nama @twindyrarasati entah kenapa selalu aja dalam fikiran itu selalu bilang, "Aku harus bisa sekeren dia, pengen secantik dia (wkwk) dan sehebat dia. Harus kreatif dan harus bisa!!!! Twindy bisa masa aku ga bisa." @twindyrarasati Terimakasih sudah memberikan inspirasi disetiap langkah dan setiap pemikiran yang luar biasa dari sebelumnya. Terimakasih sudah menjadi panutanku dalam berbagai hal. Hingga akhirnya aku akan sebut kamu sebagai "Kartini Modernku". "I swear, she's like superhero." 😊 Semoga kamu diberikan kesembuhan Aamiin Sedih sih dengernya Tapi aku yakin kamu pasti sembuh 🤗🤗 Semoga cepat sembuh dan bisa melakukan banyak hal positif lagi supaya aku terus termotivasi lebih banyak lagi. Dan semoga kita bisa dipertemukan dilain kesempatan setelah itu ❤️ Aamiin Keep fight dan Semangat Kartini Modern ku!!! 😘 Regards, Mbie/ME14 📸 : @tommysiahaan @yuliardy @bennyasrul @travelermalang 🎥 : @gadiiing https://www.instagram.com/p/B_BWhnpBaix/?igshid=5zzer1wmat5j

[liviniagp-blog]

New Fan-girling -> New Life

source

Sudah lama ngga pernah nulis isi tumblr aka blog ini.

 Banyak kisah kehidupan yg aku alami dan juga kesibukan karena kerjaan serta kegalauan amat dalam, bnyk org bilang ke aku “enak ya lu hiduplu berwarna bgt” aku Cuma bisa respons “ia tong banyak bgt sampe mirip drama ftv yang beratus episode”

Karna skrg aku lagi terluka bgt karna someone and Im really hate about him, hes kinda a fuck boi. thats make me finally left some one becos this syhit guy. Dan juga masa lalu kelam aku.

Sebenarnya ada beberapa isi pikiran selama 3-4 tahun ini yang muncul seperti

“gimana ya gua ngga laku laku nih kok ngga ada yg tertarik ama gua, gua dokter, ngga jelek juga, baik tapi jomblo, terus dengan keadaan gua sekarang makin tua, delele masih ada ngga yg bakalan mau ama gua apa karena gua bodoh, ngga cantik alias b aja, not having anything.”

“terus gimana gua kedepan ? semua org tua bakalan mati, temen lu ngga ada yg bisa selamanya bareng kamu karna mereka sekarang udh pny pasangan masing2, terus gua gimana”

Gua merasa depresi, pernah ngerasa gua ngilang atau mati lebih bagus ya, ngga ada yng saying gua lagi, dll

Gua akhirnya nemu lagu buat healing gua. Dan dia adalah musisi Ardhito Pramono

Source pict 

Hes young but multitalent, handsome boy and also having a crazy rich family but he was having bad experience in his life. Most of his song talks about depression, heart broken and his life. That what I like. Kebanyakan lagu dia persis bgt apa yg gua rasain. lagu penguatku, bahwa aku ngga sendiri banyak kok yg alami seperti aku, tinggal maju raih cita2 jalani kehidupan yg membahagiakan. i have to learning this from him. jangan munafik tampil apa adanya aja. 

Beberapa lagu yg gua suka yg cocok bgt apa yg gua rasain

Bitter Love : dimana aku merasa kayak kita bisa juga salah paham atau bertengkar dengan org lain tapi itu bahkan saling menguatkan, kalau ngga berwarna hidup ini bukan hidup dong namanya Fake Optics : banyak org di luar sana tapi ngga semua itu bisa jadi org baik mereka munafik dan palsu, diluar lain didalem lain, pura2 baik didepan ternyata orgnya shit bgt Fine Today : bersyukur akan tiap hari bisa dilewati meskipun sulit, termasuk jatuh cinta dan patah hati  Trash Talkin : maki ? I love it The Message : apa yg aku rasain kalau gua ngilang, gua rasain waktu sendiri The Sun ; about my past love life a shit man Tempat yang Tak berbahasa: hubungan LDR guaa

First time kenal si Ardhito Pramono bukan dari lagunya tapi dari acting dia di film nktchi, karna gara2 kegalauan depresi yg muncak aku tuh anggap semua lagu ngga ada yg bisa menggambarkan perasaan aku saat ini selama 3-4 tahun ini

Awalnya ngga kenal siapa tuh tapi pas diliat ganteng juga terus baik keliatan bijaksana dari peran nya ternyata fakboi bgt perannya

Line script yg menurut aku keren dari sih dhitocks alias kale ini

“sebenarnya kita apa sih ?”

“kamu maunya kita apa”

Pas denger line ini, aku langsung jawdropping omg you sucks men, THE MOST MEMORABLE CHARACTER IN INDONESIA MOVIE is HIM KALE alias Ardhito

Terus pas ke Jakarta kemarin, aku ngga tahu kenapa tiba2 req ke sepupu aku di sportfy dia lagi muter lagu barat gitu, “eh req dong ardhito pramono”, njir aku ngga tahu kenapa keinget aja dia padahal lagi beres kamar dia. LOVE HIM <3

I SWEAR TO MY SELF,  KALAU DHITO LAGI MAU  KONSER OR SOMETHING IN MANADO, I WILL PAY HOW MUCH THIS CONCERT I WILL COME JUST TAKE MY PAY DAY, I WILL BUY YOU WHISKY AND SURYA PRO MERAH ANJIR. KALO MAU MINUM CAPTIKUS GUA KASIH GRATIS OLEOLEH BUAT LU.

KALAU GUA KE JAKARTA TUNGGU LO KONSER OR SHOWCASE I WILL COME, berapa pun harga tiket caranya kesana gua bomat

Biasanya pengen bahas panjang, due of quarantine but males ngetik panjang hehe

[earth-ambassador-jim]

Stargazing

@yellowmagicalgirl Here you go!

~~~~

Eli leans on the rail watching as stars and moons circle the purple sky above him. No matter how many times he sees them it still leaves him a little breathless to realize he’s really on another planet. 

He’s alone right now; a rarity these days. His lips quirk slightly at that thought. Just a couple years ago he wouldn’t have been able to imagine having just one close friend, now an entire planet idolizes him. Several planets, actually. His popularity keeps growing. His Mom had always told him that things would change. He gets the feeling that this was not quite what she was expecting.

“ELI!”

Eli jumps slightly, letting out an undignified little yelp, and turns at the sound. It’s Aja. She’s wearing a dark blue hooded cloak instead of her royal apparel; she must have given her guards the slip again.

Despite his mood he grins at her.

“Hey.”

She throws herself down to sit on the ground beside him with a loud groan.

“I swear if I have to deal with one more person making comments about how I’m ‘so wise for my age’ and then giving me advice I never asked for, I’m going to flip my log…”

 Eli puts a hand to his mouth and chuckles.

“Noted.”

He attempts to push his glasses up, before remembering he doesn’t wear glasses anymore. The royal scientists were very excited to design the holographic vision screens he wears now.

He sighs and leans back against the rail. After a moment he feels Aja’s hand on his shoulder.

“So what has you feeling…” She pauses, likely searching for the correct human word. “Blue?”

“I’m just a little homesick I guess.” A pod shoots past above them. “Don’t get me wrong… I love it here. I get to do all sorts of cool things. And I’m a space scientist explorer ambassador person now like I’ve always wanted, but I... I guess I just miss home.”

“Ah…”

The teleporter Krel built is currently out of use for the moment as Akiridion’s best scientists, as well as ones from all across the galaxy, run experiments on it to make sure it won’t cause any problems in the long term. Earth is still only a day’s journey away with Akiridian technology but with how busy Eli is it’s been a while since he’s had a chance to visit. His friends on earth have been just as busy. Even if the teleporter was up he probably would be seeing much of them.

Not only that, but it was lonely being the only human here sometimes. He misses the familiarity of Earth and Arcadia; warm yellow sunshine and a dark night sky full of constellations he knows by heart.

Aja is quiet for a mecron.

“I know how you feel.” She says softly. “Back when I lived on your world I missed Akiridion-5 every day. Now it’s Krel I miss… and our friends.” She chuckles. “I miss your little mudball too. I even miss school.”

Eli breaths out a quiet laugh at that, then sniffles. He feels Aja put another arm around him. He leans against her and wonders how he ever got by before he had her and Steve and Toby and all his other friends. They stand there quietly for a while before Aja breaks the silence.

“I brought something to show you,” She says, removing an arm from his shoulder.

He half turns toward her as he wipes at his eyes. She pulls a blanket out from under her cloak.

“Our friends sent a... ‘care package’”.

The blanket is a fuzzy wool one; red, brown and green plaid. It looks out of place on Akiridion-5 among the neon lights and sleek technology… like Eli.

Aja unfolds the blanket and Eli’s breath catches as soft orange light hits his face.

“A heartstone…”

Aja nods.

“Jim sent it. It sounds like the one in New Jersey is doing well. He thought you might enjoy a piece.”

Eli never got to see Trollmarket while Arcadia’s heartstone was alive but Toby has shown him pictures. It’s not quite the same as seeing one in person. The crystal radiates a soothing feeling. Eli takes it from her hands and then hesitates.

“You know… I think I have an idea.”

And that’s how they end up sitting together in a deserted corner of Sector 7 with a blanket around their shoulders and a shard of heartstone in front of them casting a warm glow like campfire. The stars and planets revolve above them and Akiridion-5 buzzes with life and energy.

Eli misses Earth, but he wouldn’t trade this for the universe.

[benthicforam]

Outbreak Impulsivity

22 Maret 2020. Jam 19 kurang. I was on my room, lights off, nothing to do.

As the title suggests, page ini dibuat secara impulsif purely karena kebosanan di hari ke-7 gue self-quarantine due to the coronavirus outbreak. Thus, ‘Outbreak Impulsivity.’ Lebih dari itu, page ini dibuat karena ternyata selama self-quarantine ini gue jadi banyak banget refleksi diri terkait pribadi, karir, pendidikan, interpersonal relations, dan lain sebagainya. Dan gue pengen nulis beberapa dari hasil reflection tersebut di sebuah blog, which hopefully, bisa menjadi memento pribadi hidup gue. This is the first one.

 — 

I thought I’ve known myself very well already, but self-quarantine really proves me very wrong. Dari kecil setiap gue tes kecerdasan hasil yang paling dominan atau paling tinggi skor nya pasti kecerdasan intrapersonal, which seharusnya menggambarkan betapa aware nya gue terhadap emosi, motivasi, kepercayaan, dan tujuan diri. I really thought I knew myself that well, just to have countless fights inside my head about (ironically) how do I, as a personal, make decisions or basically function in society in the end! Disitu gue sadar oh mungkin memang gue belum se-kenal itu sama diri gue sendiri, terlepas sebelum self-quarantine ini gue selalu menyibukkan diri dengan pekerjaan dan nongkrong-nongkrong atau socializing. Ngantor sampe malem, itupun masih suka dilanjut nongkrong, pulang ke rumah tengah malem lewat langsung tidur, besok pagi kerja lagi and repeat. Weekend basian capek jadi bangun siang, itu juga maksimal 3 jam dari bangun tangan udah gatel ngajakin orang-orang nongkrong atau ya jalan-jalan aja sendiri keluar, dan pulang ke rumah malem lagi. The cycle has been going on, and on, and on… just like that. Ya gak pernah ada ‘me time’ aja gitu.

Semuanya berawal di hari Senin, hari pertama (banget) imbauan WFH (Work from Home) dari kantor. Ceritanya di hari itu gue di-message recruiter sebuah perusahaan start-up, beliau sedang mencari personnel untuk sebuah team di perusahaannya dan beliau tertarik dengan profile gue karena menurut beliau experience dan skillset gue sesuai dengan yang beliau cari. I’m always excited with new opportunities, so I said yes when she asked me to have a phone call. Jujur menarik banget sih, bukan bermaksud bragging atau gimana, gue udah beberapa kali di-message recruiter, headhunter, etc you name it tapi ini pertama kalinya gue betul-betul sampe satu jam interview sama si recruiter ini by phone. Sebelum phone nya selesai, beliau inform gue bahwa ada beberapa online Personality Test yang harus gue lakukan. Actually the deadline was set 2 days from that day, but I decided to finish all the required tests right away karena mood gue juga lagi oke because of that exhilarating interview earlier.

Salah satu dari Personality Test tersebut adalah MBTI Test, yang mana gue sudah sering banget dan se-sering itu retake test nya. Hasil nya juga selalu sama gak pernah berubah, bahkan I think even the percentages of each aspects barely change, which is ENFJ-T. Selalu itu, selalu ENFJ-T gak pernah berubah. Tapi hari itu gue decide untuk test ulang dan voila, hasilnya berubah jadi ESFJ-T. Gue faham kalo MBTI Test itu gak absolut dan menggambarkan kecenderungan kepribadian saat itu, even some doubts its validity, I know and I’m fully aware of it. Cuma yang bikin gue bengong adalah I was REALLY sure none of my answers changed from the last time I took the test! But it turned out my personal energy turned pretty much from ‘Intuitive’ to ‘Observant’, which means (kalau berdasarkan 16personalities.com) I used to rely on imagining the past and future potential of what I see but now I’m more interested in observable facts and more straightforward outcomes.

Gue jadi mikir sebetulnya apa sih akar dari perubahan tersebut? Can I trace back what event resulted in such alteration? Nah… Sebetulnya kalau ditanya secara gamblang pun sampai detik gue ngetik ini gue gak bisa jawab sih. HAHA maaf. Tapi gue ambil 2 case, yang satu terjadi di masa lampau, dan satu case terjadi sekarang dimana rentang waktu nya gak jauh, cuma beda 1 tahun.

The first one is pretty much in 2019. The whole 2019 was a nasty mess for me. 2019 adalah masa-masa gue menghadapi sidang Pemetaan Geologi Lanjutan dan Skripsi (gak cuma skripsi, di jurusan gue ada 2 syarat kelulusan), keliling either itu dari Halim (rumah)-Depok (kampus)-Cipulir (tempat penelitian skripsi), pulang larut malam hampir setiap hari buat ngerjain 2 tugas akhir gue tersebut, 2 sidang, sambil ngulang Kalkulus. Beberapa kali dispute sama dosen pembimbing karena hal-hal kecil yang seharusnya bisa gak perlu terjadi sampe last minute hampir gak diizinin sidang skripsi. Uang saku turun banget karena harus resign dari part-time Starbucks. H-1 sidang proposal one of my exes decided to mess with my feelings sehingga di hari-H gue sidang proposal gue tidur jam 3 pagi karena ngerjain revisian sambil mental breakdown. Pacar (yang sekarang sudah menjadi mantan) yang gak suportif susah diajak ketemu, berantem setiap hari, dan ibaratnya malah shoving away ketika gue butuh moral support. Akhirnya bahkan putus 2 hari sebelum gue sidang skripsi. Bokap nyokap yang malah lebih galak dari biasanya, overworried skripsi gue gak selesai karena dikiranya gue nongkrong terus padahal pulang malem juga karena skripsian bahkan gue pernah bimbingan sama dosen pembimbing pemetaan gue malem-malem di Starbucks. Countless nights nginep di McD buat skripsian dan bukan efek jera procrastinating, but I was really short in time that moment.

Don’t get me wrong, God knows how hard I strove on my 8th semester in college. I worked my ass off. Gak sekali-dua kali kalo di KRL pikiran gue bengong, I felt nothing, everything is okay, trus yaudah tiba-tiba gak ada angin gak ada ujan langsung breakdown aja gitu nangis kejer karena se-capek dan se-sedih itu, dada langsung sakit tiap terlintas pikiran “God, do I really deserve all of this?”

Setelah itu semua, I managed to finish my thesis and geological mapping, berhasil sidang dua-duanya dengan nilai yang buat gue cukup memuaskan. But, ada insiden kecil yang membuat gue gak lulus Kalkulus di semester tersebut dan gue harus kuliah lagi di semester 9. Tahun ke-lima, bayar SPP full, just for a f****ing 2-credit course. 2019 was one hell of a ride.

 — 

Lalu sekarang, menjelang kuartal ke-dua 2020. Dalam scope yang besar mungkin 2020 so far juga bukan tahun yang baik, dimulai dari banjir hampir di seluruh Jakarta right on the very first day of the year, hampir perang dunia ke-tiga, banjir lagi di Jakarta, dan sekarang corona virus outbreak. Not meaning it to be selfish, but in a personal scale, I root so much for 2020. I finally graduated this year, signed a contract for a permanent job that I love even before graduating, good relations with (almost) all the people around me. My life seems like it is finally getting together. Love life-wise mungkin belum sesuai harapan, but I’m pretty much grateful for whatever comes into my plate right now. My job got tense and pressurizing at times, some my colleagues got unhelpful at times, but I can handle my stressors very much better now. Bahkan gue expect gue gak akan survive self-quarantine ini karena I swear to God gue bahkan gak inget kapan gue diem di rumah selama 24 jam penuh, tapi ternyata I think I’ve been doing fine these past days.

Bahkan gue jadi banyak mengambil silver lining, gue belajar banyak bersyukur bahkan atas kejadian-kejadian yang selama ini mungkin bisa dibilang gue kufur nikmat. Gue bersyukur gue punya pekerjaan amidst this chaos, kantor yang betul-betul put attention terhadap isu Covid-19 sampe punya channel #fightcovid19 di Slack dan jadi salah satu perusahaan pertama yang nerapin WFH, gue bersyukur punya orangtua yang masih mau dengerin himbauan gue terkait Covid-19 dan masih bisa kumpul sama mereka, gue bersyukur gak ngerasa sakit atau punya gejala-gejala Covid-19, gue bersyukur banyak banget kemudahan buat gue akses informasi, gue bersyukur bisa afford catering sehat untuk makan siang gue selama WFH ini, gue punya air yang mengalir dan sabun di rumah, gue gak punya kendala dengan tempat tinggal, dan gue bersyukur gue jadi tersadarkan bahwa thankfully my life is actually not that bad (at least for the moment). Gue bersyukur sudah tersadarkan bahwa ternyata masih banyak yang bisa gue syukuri di hidup gue.

My closest friends and relatives understand how dramatic and shitty my life could really be at its worst, my failures in love, study, and career. But now thankfully I never find myself having mental breakdowns on public transportations anymore. I’m not frustrated by the condition I am in, which is self-quarantine.

 — 

Jadi sebetulnya setelah ngoceh panjang lebar, what’s the point and what does it have to do with my change from being an ENFJ to an ESFJ? Kalau menurut gue, sepertinya pada masanya I felt really entitled and I felt that life was unrealistically unfair. Gue sebetulnya yakin pasti banyak sebetulnya hal yang bisa gue syukuri di tahun 2019 bahkan mungkin lebih banyak daripada sekarang but I missed it all karena gue terlalu sibuk dengan ekspektasi bahwa I actually deserved better than what I had (reference to my monologue saying “God, do I really deserve this?” constantly). Lalu rasa-rasanya gue terlalu berfokus pada ‘what ifs’ and I got lost in thought many times, which turned out to be very toxic karena in the end yang bisa gue kontrol cuma diri sendiri tapi gue malah ran away with my thoughts and gaslighted myself as if what I’ve done is a coping mechanism. Well, sakit juga ya realita. Dari what ifs what ifs tersebut gue rasa keliatan banget sisi ‘Intuitive’ gue, which is berfokus pada imajinasi dari masa lampau (penyesalan) dan ekspektasi tidak realistis di masa depan.

Sedangkan sekarang sepertinya gue jadi bisa lebih nrimo ing pandum, bisa melihat keadaan sebagai fakta objektif dan menarik kesimpulan yang gak neko-neko. Keadaan lagi kayak tai? Well then be it. I can see myself being much more careless, but in a way I am proud of. I am channeling my energy to the things I can control and only to the things I deem worthy of my time. And what I thought matches a lot with the description of ‘Observant’ trait.

Jujur masih penasaran banget sebetulnya turning point nya dimana, but to finally be able to notice the difference in me already makes me happy. I feel like I am reuniting with myself again. I still got a looong way to discover myself, but at the moment I guess I’m just gonna enjoy funny Tik Tok videos containing Grammy 2020 nominees with that Boss Bitch - Doja Cat soundtrack. Gosh sooo cool. PSA to love yourself more, Ciao!