#AND THAT WAS A RANDOM FAN ON THE INTERNET

[bleachbleachbleach]

Verisimilitude (long thoughts about writing)

Sometimes I get mailed random books to consider for course adoption. The first one I looked at the other day was so incredibly bad I could not make it past page 12--"oh my god I hate books" bad; "trees were wasted on this!!" bad. And then there's this one. I've made it to page 30-something and I could have told you 20 pages ago that Oliver Twist it would remain, but I am still reading it to read it, and maybe keep it to recommend extracurricularly. (The protagonist Alva is a weeb for American culture, whatever the word is for that, which I think could make for interesting study!) But that's all context to say,

AH YES THE INTERNET RABBIT HOLE OF NARUTO FAN FICTION, HENTAILORD. WE'VE ALL BEEN THERE.

SO...

BLEACH MENTION WHEN????

Based on the style of her screen name, the Naruto porn, and her listening to My Chemical Romance and Linkin Park, this girl is definitely living her teenage life in the mid-00s, in ways that are searingly obvious. Which feels like it should be a massive success in terms of using verisimilitude to pinpoint a particular time and place and, by extension, person. But I don't think it does?

In thinking about why this doesn't work for me as a reader:

1. As a general rule, I tend not to enjoy "fandom" subculture references like this in fiction, because they have never felt true to my experience of fandom, or even my experience of others' experiences of fandom. The specificity is there but not the verisimilitude. Whether this is because of an inability to articulate the breath of life that animates fandom spaces, or a feeling of needing to at least kind of translate it for the uninitiated general audience, I don't know. Not that Alva's narrative goes far enough to merit this discussion; she's just reading Naruto porn for one sentence, but it just doesn't land right for me. (Sidebar, this is probably also why I don't enjoy acafandom or fandom essays that aspire to acafandom; there's usually this attempted, manufactured critical/"objective" distance from the text that often feels performative, or at least the wrong [or less interesting] tool for the job. And even where 'in-group' positionality is addressed, the translation required to make these things legible to the out-group is just--well, not what I want in life, I guess!)

2. I am a great believer in drawing greatly from what you know and feel and all those random thoughts and behaviors and emotions and tics that make life interesting, and giving them to fiction. In fanfic especially, I am a great believer in seeing the author's hands in a text, making the story (and the original canon) unmistakably theirs. But I kind of always want them to be hands that are in the act of giving. By which I mean, I think there's a difference between all these things existing in a story and having been given to a character or a world or a story, and integrated genuinely into them.

Like, all I can think about while reading this book is how the author definitely lived through the mid-00s in a particular and very familiar way. Rather than create a richly immersive world, the details jump out of the page and leave the story behind. They don't feel like they belong to Alva (or perhaps Alva does not feel like a character with the depth to hold them and make them hers). They belong do the author, and to me, and to history, but Alva falls out of the equation. And if this is going to work, I feel like Alva can't fall out of the equation.

3. I was talking to a friend about something similar a few months ago. She was complaining about a historical fiction book she was reading with a book club she leads at the library she works at--how it was clearly very well-researched, but dry as hell. The information was not animated by the story itself. And I compared it to a fanfic I'd (not) read, where the author was very proud of all the research they'd done and how accurate-to-life its setting was. (To be clear, I'm not subtweeting Bleach fandom. Completely different fandom! Also this fanfic was published like 16 years ago.) The fic did bring in lots of specific details about trees and highways and city names--things I knew well, too, because it was set where my sister lives--but rather than be as exciting and, again, rich, as I feel like that familiarity could have been, it all felt dead. Because all these things were described specifically, but not true to how the narrating characters would describe them, or mentally catalogue them, or experience them.

And you might think, well, how would we possibly know how a character thinks about highways? It's not like he's explained this in canon. And I'd say, well, you definitely can. There are probably a lot of different ways a character could plausibly think about highways, depending on the specific shade and flavor of your characterization of them, all equally believable; but it's got to be part of the equation. There are a lot of ways to be right, and you know it when it's wrong. The wrong-est way it can be is for the way they think about highways to not factor into the way those dang highways are being described by them, in their POV.

4. I think about this both as a reader and as a writer--certainly more often as a writer, because I find that level of imagining a character's headspace the VERY best part of the process, and also because I am often concerned I am not doing it, or at least not well, lol. I'm positive I've done all the things I've just talked about not enjoying.

These concerns exist at the level of characterization work in general, but also at that level of, is the wizard behind the green curtain? Are his hands giving? Because while I do write fanfic because "it is fun" and because "this idea interests me," I am also usually writing it to work through deeply personal emotions/experiences. Which again, perhaps selfishly, I support that. But from a craft perspective I don't want it to feel, transparently, like "oh lol this author is going through it."

Moreover, from a relational perspective, I don't want that to be the relationship between me as author and the characters. Because one thing I am ALWAYS writing fanfic to do is to indulge my feelings about how much I am in complete, rapturous love with the characters and worlds in question. I don't want to just place things upon them, like a film or shroud; I want them to be given, integrated, arriving in the text wholly in their bodies and in their minds and entirely theirs. And I mean this for both the emotional arcs and conflicts and the random tics and details. I want them to have been given, and to belong, and to feel completely and inextricably theirs.

So, those are my thoughts about mid-00s Naruto porn!!!

I'd love to hear others' perspectives, as readers or writers or both. Have you had similar reactions, or quite different? Why do you write, and what do you want? What's your template for how you think about characterization, or your writerly relationship to canon/characters?

[stardustizuku]

I have never vibe with an MLB critic essay so hard as yours do. People put salt on a lot of different things of MLB, but you hit every point of that really hits home of why the show is a dissapointment for me; from the Love Square wasted potential, the expectation of a Magical Girl show that wasn't delivered, the messy incoherent themes that is not represented well in their powers or villains, the umbalance power dynamics complete with comparison.

Too bad you drop it though (reasonably), I really wish to read what you think of Sentimonster!Adrien or even the Finale.

Something interesting happens when I completely give up on a show. And that's that...I really stop expecting anything from it.

When the Sentimonster thing came out, I genuinely just sighed. I couldn't even form an opinion because all I could feel is "this is such wasted potential".

The idea of a child being created via an object - and having said object tied to them, is such a good one. And it raises so many interesting and profound ideas. It could speak about how parents see their kids as nothing but dolls. It could be a very cool concept of Adrien someone who has the power to DESTROY, not only having a gentle soul but having to protect this object.

All things get presented to us for a reason - even if that reason is purely aesthetics.

Why are the girls in Tokyo Mew Mew animals? Because the creator thought catgirls were cool.

Why do we have witches in madoka? Because witches are the evolved form a "girl with magic" aka a "magical girl". And that's a cool thought.

Why is the Princess Tutu inspired by the swan lake ballet and why does it chose "defying destiny" as it premise? Because in real life, the swan lake ballet has multiple endings, some tragic, some happy. The tragedy aspect of it, enhances the princess tutu aesthetic.

Why was Adrien introduced to us as a Sentimonster?

And that's the thing. I can't even wrap my head around why would you make that creative choice.

It's an interesting idea, but one that feels more rooted on someone seeing a headcanon of it online and trying to pander to the audience with it. A sort of torture porn (which in a vacuum isn't something I'm opposed to), just to hammer home how shitty Adrien's life is. How abusive his dad is. Which, btw, doesn't even make sense when you think abt how he got redeemed in the recent episodes.

My point is, I can't have an opinion on "Adrien being a sentimonster" because I can't see why. Why they did it. And my lack of interest in the series, makes it so that I don't wanna spend pondering the "why".

What's the point? What themes did it introduce? Does it tie to the miraculous stuff somehow? Does it coherently expand upon the known lore?

Like, Katherine from Genshin Impact - it recently got revealed she's a doll controlled by the Fatui. This serves the purpose of allowing Nahida, an extremely kind archon, to have a vessel she can control. It shows insight of Marionette's powers, and how likely the adventurer's guild is to be related to the Fatui or Snezhnayan politics, as well as have an in-game reason as to why there's a Katherine in each region.

While it's also an out of left field bonkers thing getting revealed, it MAKES SENSE. There's a reason why she was made this way.

But with Adrien, there isn't. It's just /there/. Not really related to anything, no foreshadow, or anything. This is all, obviously, tied to the terrible writing of the show. But this is just insane. I do not understand it. I seriously can't.

[l0ganberry]

perfect timing! I'm definitely getting this.

[star-x-shine]

i think that the stranger things fandom could use several lessons on multishipping, canon vs. non-canon, and just manners

[sonknuxadow]

I’m honestly surprised that people are saying Keanu reeves is a bad choice despite the popular fan discussions about it. Where I’m at in the internet, he’s considered a good choice and people were excited.

i cant speak for everyone obviously but ive always thought he was a bad choice for shadow ever since the idea started going around 2 years ago. because from what ive heard personally he doesnt really sound like shadow + i hate it when big movie stars are given voice acting roles in movie adaptations just to have a big name attached to the project even if theyre not good for the role. and this definitely feels like that. back in the day people were only saying he should be shadow NOT because his voice actually fits but because hes an edgy action guy or whatever and movie sonic is canonically a fan of him/his movies and they could make jokes out of that. and i feel like thats Still what a lot of peoples reasoning is which annoys me because shadow isnt just an edgy action guy and i dont think his voice should be chosen based on a joke of all things especially if the voice isnt fitting enough to justify it

not gonna say my opinion is the most popular but i know that there are a lot of people who agree with me on this, or at the very least are unsure about it. a lot of people dont want him

[animentality]

you talk like a proshipper

i don't believe in censorship.

I also don't believe in the idea that people will read bad fanfiction and do bad things.

you guys got that order wrong. bad things happen, and they are reflected in fiction. people are allowed to discuss bad things that happen to themselves or others through their chosen medium.

as long as they don't bother a real person, who cares?

you motherfuckers are siding with conservatives on this bullshit.

there are no fucking thought crimes. you are not a bad person because you ship will and hannibal.

you are not a bad person because you wank it to toxic ass romances.

[cutechan555]

Ez

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<< The start

[kangaracha]

Hi there! Before I ask to be added to any tag lists (or start reading, for that matter,) I just wanted to ask about whether or not you mind having minors reading/ interacting with your work? I couldn’t find any dni’s on the Queendom masterlist or on your profile, so just wanted to be sure… ㅠㅠ (sorry if this is crossing any boundaries 😭🫶🏻)

i'm a big believer in curating and being responsible for your own internet experience, and i live far too busy a life to police my followers, so no, I don't mind! 😂 what you want to come and look at on the internet is your business, and as long as you're not coming round here to cause problems (which you very clearly aren't) i don't have a problem with you

[monstermoviedean]

what a fine selection of words for this november 19 (source)

[iguessitsjustme]

Listen. Do I know it's a bad idea to go into the MDL comments? Yes. Do I do it anyway? Of course I do. I'm nosy. I want to see what disasters are happening in there.

[nerfpuncher]

[angelogistics]

if i hosted a zine like a real just dirt-under-your-nails raw scuffed knees midnight poetry eye-crust zine would anyone wanna put in pieces with me

[anonymous-pie-0o0]

Can y'all criticize me, because i don't know how to improve this. Anyway i love this man, I'll volunteer to be his needle puppet

[overheard-at-camp-half-blood]

Saw someone on a post advertising the show go, “Does this take place before or after the movies?”

🤦‍♀️

[mixedupmysteries]

hey since a lot of my followers on both here and instagram are part of the ghost and pals fandom I just wanted to say that I really don’t plan on contributing or interacting with this fandom that much anymore. I mostly started interacting with the fandom in early 2023 once I started my instagram account but I’m starting to dislike it; it feels like it’s mostly just a bunch of chronically online people fighting over the stupidest stuff and that’s about it. I also feel like ghost kind of starts a lot of the fighting amongst their fans in a way. so yeah I might upload some gnp fanart very rarely since the character designs are still somewhat decent, but don’t expect much from me. I’d rather focus on media I actually do like instead of what people followed me for.

[simply-sithel]

(Requested) Like Clockwork by @agentmoppet [AO3]

Earlier this summer I bound this fic on request of a reader [see: post] and was flattered when the author expressed interest in a copy for herself. Sent and received a while ago. The marbling turned out denser than I'd like and I still wince at that uneven trimming of the leather under cover paper... but author seems happy with the piece, and that's what matters!

Given I'd already typeset it, I found focusing on just the binding to be soothing. That "small" imposition remains pleasing to work with. Still unable to title things, but I assume if I add enough ✨pizzazz✨ folks wont notice...