#Adam Deez

[cartyrs]

You guys ever hear about saw con?

[silkythewriter]

Angel on fire

Warnings!: Angst(?), love triangle!, sorry for any grammar or spelling errors! (part 2)

Fandom!: Hazbin hotel!

Author note!: WOWZA HELLO I DIDNT THINK PEOPLE WOULD LIKE THE 1ST ONE SO MUCH?! TYSM FOR TGE SUPPORT I HOPE YOU ENJOY!

Summary!: “you are as beautiful as the moon my dear.” He said with the sweeting smile you adored. “And your as deadly as the sun I fear, my love” you answered oh so bitter-fully.

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“Cause those are my words, not yours

As far as I'm concerned, it could've been a lot worse

I wasn't trying to avoid the confrontation

She isn't crying, she's just making conversation”

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“Look.. Adam-“ you said desperately before being cut off “no fucking way!” He chuckled “your actually side-ing with those shit bags?!” He said looking at you. You only glared at him, before huffing softly “watch your language…” You said with a with a small frown. Making his eyebrows crunch together as he closed his eyes with a huff. “For fuck sake do you know what those.. scums even did to end up there!” He said angrily. You steady your breath, with him you had too, you knew how he was but you just had too keep poking at him. Or get something other then a no, If you did you were sure to lose your mind.

“Adam, Just listen!, I think this could benefit heaven as well! More extra time means more time to do what you want. Wouldn’t you like that?” You tried reasoning as you cupped his hands in yours only for him to push it away. “Don’t test me Y/n, this is my job.” He spat out, making you wince. “Why are you pushing on this so hard anyways!, you have all you could want here. You barely have to lift a finger why are you so concerned for them?” He said crossing his arms. “They were humans once Adam, just like you, just like me. We’re no different, they just messed up once and we’re sent to an eternal furnace with no escape!” You said holding your hands to your chest. “Please! I’m nothing like them, I was the first fucking human soul in heaven, no one compares to me.” He laughed out. “So what does that mean about me?” You said with furrowed brows. He sighed heavily before speaking “Angel, listen to your self, your the only other person I really give a shit about. Well other then lute I guess” he shrugged as he rested his arm on the arm rest and laid his head in his palm boredly. “Look don’t worry your little gorgeous self about a thing. This ain’t your field!” He laughed.

You had patience, and you had tolerance. But his disrespect set you off. But you knew in your head that fighting someone like himself wouldn’t end well. You already had more leeway then most due to your, well close relationship with Adam. But you had to keep trying, after all angels don’t break promises.

With a heavy sigh you bowed before excusing your self. Which he quickly called out to you in confusion. But you only kept walking to your room, you were a patient one, but dealing with him proves to be a handful. You needed to think of a way to at least push it back one more month.

Just one more month

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“What’s good cherry pimp” Angel dust asked as he threw himself on the couch sluggishly. “All day you’ve been hummin’ and tappin’ what’s on your mind?” He asked as he quirked an eyebrow up as he put his gaze on Alastor. Alastor smile only grew, his mind filled with your intoxicating self. To him you very much everything, from the first day he was damned, till now all his mind was filled was you. But now more then ever, seeing you after all these decades was a shot of electricity to his very dead heart. You hadn’t change a bit since the last time he laid eyes on you. You were still angelic as ever.

Again he was swept up in his mind but quickly flicked back to reality, swaying softly as he hummed. “Oh nothing, my dear friend, old acquaintances I have recently seen after some time!” He said in his usual radio voice. “Yea I’m surprised anyone would be friends with you. Not to be rude or nothin’ but your fuckin’ creepy pal” angel said as he laughed  as he waved his hands. Alastor only smirked in amusement as he took his leave. 

He should have known someone of the likes of you would end up where most wouldn’t. He wasn’t an ounce surprised. But he wanted you back, and he was going to take what he wanted. He didn’t frankly care if you’d belong to the sky,

You were his angel first. And he’d rid those little wings of yours if it meant you were to never fly Away from him.

Not this time, not again

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You tiredly tapped your finger over the dinner table. Mind still racing with ideas, it was a cycle, coming up with something, but ultimately crossing it off the thinking board. Adam paid no mind for awhile as he chatted Away with Lute. Which was eyeing you suspiciously. And once Adam went back to his meal she quickly cleared her throat as she straighten her stance next to Adam “Miss Y/n, you haven’t touched your food.” She stated bluntly. Which made you snap out of thought as you turned you attention to her “I’m afraid I don’t have an appetite today” you said softly pushing the plate stacked with food away form you.

“Are you really still hung up on that stupid shit little miss princess of hell proposed?” He scoffed. Causing you to huff, “I’ll be taking my leave.” You said plainly but as nicely as you could as you backed you seat from the table and stood up causing him to grunt. “Look angel, if I think about pushing the damn extermination back would you drop this?” He said making you quickly turn to him with a smile and nod. “There’s that smile, now sit down and eat I’m tired of thinking of all of this” he said as you agreed taking a seat.

Lute was appalled at how… how quick it was was all agreed. How could he just push it back so easily? Even if it was just him “thinking” about it. And for no reason other then you?, all though Adam was to In-grossed in his own things to question such things. She did not and quickly grew suspicious, you out of all people should be less worried. You have everything in a silver platter yet you still seem to have such a worry in matters that weren’t concerning you in the first place.

You could feel her eyes staring you down. But her suspicions were very much valid even if unfortunate to your case. You’d have to be more careful, if she caught on, she’d be quick to make Adam question aswell.

You cursed yourself slightly but still happy non the less. Even if you got Adam to consider the possibility of pushing the date back was still a progress!.

You were sure to tell Charlie soon, although you’d have to wait till lutes suspicions and stares would die down so you could slip away.

Your patience were never ending, but oh how much you longed for the man you’ve last seen years ago.

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TYSM FOR READING AH I LOVED WRITING THIS AGAIN TYSM FOR THE LOVE ON NY LAST POST, ILL BE SURE TO WORK ON SOEM REQUEST BUT PLEASE BE ASSURED PART 3 WILL BE POSTED AFTER I DO SOME REQUEST. ٩(ᐛ)و

[wowifinallywatched]

Saw: The Final Chapter

Me: A room and the lighting of it won't make me emotional

The Room: *The OG saw bathroom*

Me: SOBBING IN THE CORNER BESIDE MY BABY BOY ADAMS BODY

[floofyberries]

Adam Frankensteins the type of dude to cry during a math test

[adammilligan]

it would be so much fun if adam walked the line between being a silly drunk and being a sappy drunk. like yknow he gets wasted and suddenly it's a toss-up whether he's gonna tell michael his halo is soooo pretty or make a deez nuts joke. or both

[rory-cakes]

A Buck and A Canary

What was she doing here?

Why was she smiling at him like nothing happened?

He left their child alone!

He let her die!

He lied to her!

It has been one week since the battle at the Habin Hotel. They were starting to finish the reconstruction of the hotel when something strange happened. An angel appeared. 

“Hello! My name is Y/n Altruist, and the higher-ups of heaven have sent me to oversee the progress of the hotel!” 

“THEY CHANGED THEIR MINDS!?” Charlie was practically vibrating with joy. 

“Why?” Vaggie asked skeptically. 

“Well, unlike before, we have proof that your hotel works! A certain serpent has shown up in heaven!”

“Sir Penitouse is alive!” everyone was filled with overwhelming joy. 

“Also”

Y/n bowed in respect. 

“I deeply apologize for the exterminations. They were never supposed to happen. Sera and Adam were working alone in that sense.” 

Charlie grabbed her hand and helped her back up. 

“So really, no one knew? How is that possible?”

“The seven virtues are the only defense against evil on Earth so they have their hands full with that, I’m afraid. I was at the meeting and I brought up the issue as soon as I could!”

“Why do you care so much about what happens to us? No offense, we’re really grateful you did what you did! But why?”

“Well, I'm afraid my answer is a little selfish. My husband is down here. He wasn’t a good man but he was a good husband and he would have been a good father hadn’t he died.”

How did an angel like her end up with someone down here?

Wait-

An angel like her?

“Im sorry, but what is your husband’s na-”

“Birdy?”

“Alastor?”

Alastor sat uncomfortably on the plush couch in his room. Y/n sat equally as uncomfortable in a chair of a similar design. You could cut the tension in the air with a knife. 

Alastor avoided making eye contact with his wife. I mean she had to know who he truly was at this point. How could she not?

“Alastor.”

She breaks the silence. 

“I’ve missed you dearly, my darling.”

Why was she smiling?

“I know what you did, and while I can’t say I’m pleased, that doesn’t change the fact that you are my husband.”

What?

“You cherished and loved me for so many years. You took care of me and Eudora. You loved me with everything you had.”

This isn’t right.

“So, if you haven’t stopped loving me in the time we’ve been apart,”

No

“I’d like to be your wife still.”

Alastor finally looked at his ethereal wife. She was so good. She shouldn’t be corrupted by his darkness. 

“I left her alone.”

“So did I.”

Y/n smiled at the man in front of her. This was her Alastor. This was the man she fell in love with. Sure, there were blazing red flags and she should probably be running for the hills. However, she can’t deny the urge to be with him. 

“I’ve been watching over her.”

“You have? How is she?”

“She’s lived a long life. She’s been married to her wife for about 40 years now. She adopted three kids and has a bunch of grandkids. She had her own radio show, Al!”

“She did?”

“She did.”

Y/n moves to sit beside him and grabs his hand with both of hers. Alastor finally pulls her closer,

“You deserve so much more than I am. I cursed you in life I can’t let you get hurt again.”

“You are all that I want, and if I get cursed because of it, that will have been my decision.”

She places her hand on his face, and he leans into it. 

“My darling Alastor, there is nothing you can do for me to stop loving you.”

“Alright, Birdy, I’ll have you for as long as you wish to stay.”

And so the Buck was reunited with his Canary.  

A/N: Hi! I hope you liked the last part of Alastor's Birdy! If you have scenarios you would like me to write with this au, just send me an ask and ill get to it as soon as I can!

Taglist: @crazed-flower, @nanamunath, @preferably-fictional, @eccedentesiast-sapphic, @leximus98, @cupidsgift, @mag-chan, @stygianoir, @thereeallink, @yelloeukulele, @mariaclarade-la-cruz1, blurpleuni-squid, @galaxywing-has-adhd, @just-here-reading, @deez-nuts0, @strawberry-gothic, @purplerose291,@1-800-mocha, @trashbin-nie, @queenmizuki, @nkirukaj @bennythebitch @otherthoughtsofbu, @fantasycantasy, @hunnybee11626, @notally-tormal, @valerie-36, @lovingyeet, @holographicage, @har-har-harvey, @i-love-jafar, @cupidsgift, @meow-meowo, @theblueslytherin, @deadt3tinside, @lyralibra, @the-unhinged-raccoon, @avitute, @alastorswifeee, @stygianoir, @sideshow-b0b, @deadlymouse123, @mysingularitybts, @emotionalfangirl2002, @t0xic1vi, @goodlittlepup, @starsatmyhome, @wendds, @reader3, @redfoxgotlost, @hurthermore, @frostychurro @isa-dragon

[m3lodyxo]

Welcome to "Is my taste in men bad or is he actually hot?"

On today's instalment we have:

The one.

The only.

The unapologetically hilarious...

*drumroll sound for dramatic effect cause I'm sassy*

------------------------------------------------------

Adam a.k.a. The Dick Master, also known by:

The leader of the Exterminators

The original dick

The first man

Mr. "All of humanity came from deez nuts"

(Second panel is NOT my art. All credit goes to scout_ish on Twitter.... X?? Idfk man, eat the rich, I hate this, I'm still calling it Twitter.)

ANYWHO

Now, is it the fact he's hilarious? Is it because he wears a mask? Is it the because Alex Brightman voices him? OR, is it because he plays guitar and I'm definitely part of the problem with stereotypes?

The amswer is E) all of the above

I blame all the fanart people do of him and two cosplayers in particular.

denki.darling

and

Har_Fie

I'm not even gonna try to justify this one. He's just silly, which in my book, is atractive.

Hes uglyhot guys, please.

[rubra-wav]

Various Adam headcanons

A/N I'm not an Adam simp, I just have been thinking abt him since the last post I did.

A lot of these are just things I feel in vibes and are completely baseless haha.

Cw: SFW, angsty in parts, misogyny, slight reference to disordered eating, uhhh idk man it's mixed

He's very messy and his house is like a bombsite of unwashed dishes and laundry.

Think messy roommate horror stories: that's him, and he doesn't give a single damn about it. Thinks he shouldn't have to clean up his house because that's a 'chick thing'

He's naturally really warm and overheats a lot because of it. Due to this, he has his house cold so he isn't sweating his ass off at all times.

He's really good to sleep next to during cold weather, but is God awful during hot weather.

Will not stop bitching about it being too hot when he's slightly uncomfortable and laughs at people who are easily cold, calling them weak.

His favourite things to watch are shitty b grade movies - especially comedy ones.

Prides himself on knowing current lingo, memes, and jokes (and actually pulls off not sounding like an old person trying to be 'hip with the kids' and cringey)

Follow up: makes deez nuts and ligma jokes out of everything and finds it hilarious. Sera sent him out of a meeting for doing this to Emily one time.

He's the type of mf who is pretentious asf about beer being superior and believes any guy who likes sweeter drinks / doesn't like beer are pussies.

He secretly doesn't believe this in the slightest and actually hates beer, he'd never admit it though. He has a sweet tooth and actually really likes drinks like Baileys.

Constantly talking, even if it's just to himself.

He likes AC/DC a lot. Ironically, 'highway to hell' is one of his favourite songs of all time.

He always wears his mask because he feels more vulnerable without it.

If you're close with him, he'd likely feel more comfortable to take it off around you - would fight to keep it on at all times if he doesn't trust you or feel safe with you.

I headcanon he put on weight after getting to heaven because after he was kicked out of Eden he didn't have nearly as much food, so he began binging when he finally had it again. It kind of just stayed a comfort for him.

He's really insecure about his weight gain too. If you point it out he's gonna get really upset. (Like how Lucifer does in ep 8)

Follow up: he literally always has snacks and is an absolute bitch about sharing them. If he does share them with you, he expects you to be really grateful.

His masculinity is fragile as it gets.

Would physically wilt if you even slightly imply he's not masculine and then become extremely angry and try to prove he actually is.

The main reason he is misogynistic is due to his experience with Lilith.

Before Lilith ran away from him, I think that Adam actually had extremely high respect for women.

His whole purpose was to reproduce. Women do a hell of a lot more then men during the whole process of reproduction and dude worships pussy even now (he named his best soldier after it. Not after dick, vag)

I imagine that it was a much larger appreciation for women in general before Lilith screwed him over.

This soured into misogyny, though, after she ran away and likely grew much, much worse with Eve due to her actually being made from him.

Eve then proceeded to eat the apple given to her and resulted in them being kicked out of Eden, which made it even worse.

He's the definition of that one reddit incel who had bad experiences with a handful of women and now is an absolute misogynistic cunt lmao

Hella abandonment issues.

Also hella jealousy issues.

Doesn't matter if you're a friend or a partner, he's going to be grappling to be number one and the only one in your life.

He's not manipulative or slick about it even a little though, it's obvious as it gets. Will vy for your attention by being literally as obnoxious as possible constantly.

Literally so clingy.

If you ever point it out, he'll deny it though and get very flustered.

Bro needs reassurance so bad you aren't gonna leave him if you're his partner.

Will sometimes just get really quiet and ask if he did something if he even slightly senses a tone shift to negativity.

Pretends it never happened afterwards and will downplay his fears massively if you call him out on it.

He's the type of sleeper who moves around a lot and ends up upside down somehow. Also a sleep talker.

Is the type of mf who has the skill to transcribe songs into guitar simply by ear.

He never shuts up about it, so although it is actually a really incredible skill, you want to not praise it because of how annoying he is over it.

Follow up: can play most types of guitar.

One of those extremely annoying rock fans who scoff when you put on anything but rock.

Also acts like he knows more about rock than anybody.

If you put on country music around him, he will forcefully grab the aux from you to turn it off.

He knows he actually isn't very smart at all and is super insecure about it.

He's had it used against him time and time again by people like Lilith and overcompensates to deter this by acting like he is actually the smartest person at all times.

When someone treats him like he's stupid, especially about something he actually knows/is knowledgeable about, he's extremely defensive about it (like when Lute points out the shield to him in ep 8)

Would be the type to go "Mansplaining means 'man explaining things'" to you with complete lack of self-awareness.

I need to draw Sera looking absolutely horrified as he screams the lyrics to highway to hell so bad.

Got possessed with the energy I had to suddenly write this omg.

[the-feral-gremlin]

Allergies I think Voltron characters have:

Keith has an allergy to grass, not like the sneezing when around it or anything but the kind where if their skin makes contact with it, it feels like he’s being bitten by fire ants. Lance once tackled him down a hill and it was not fun for either of them. (I have this allergy so I’m kinda speaking from experience.)

I just think Hunk is mild-ish allergic to cats. He sneezes SO much when there’s one around but he really wants to pet one.

I think Allura and Coran are both allergic to bees, both earth and Altean. So Coran always brings an epi pen wherever he goes and makes Allura have one on her too.

Lance is allergic to food coloring and most seafood.

Adam and Shiro are both lactose intolerant. They both got really good at finding dairy free alternatives for different foods that they knew they both liked.

Matt and Pidge are both deathly allergic to peanuts. (Matt spent so fucking long explaining deez nuts jokes to Keith because he kept making them and Keith was worried.)

Romelle is allergic to Juneberries and dairy.

Krolia is allergic to those space catapillars (the ones that were attached to hunk in that one episode.)

[starry-hughes]

what does she think of umich boys

ethan edwards: “he’s cute in this photo but he looks like a video game character”

mark estapa: “mark estapa puttin deez nuts in your mouth.”

nolan moyle: “AWWW HE’S CUTE!!”

luca fantilli: “… he looks like he would be in diary of a wimpy kid”

adam fantilli: “he’s like… a cute… kinda cute but at the same time there’s no thought behind his eyes.. just puck, just hockey stick, just men.”

dylan duke: “oh my god you know the robots movie?? big weld.”

[drpsps]

Saw characters incorrect quotes but it’s shit me and my friends said online

Mark : “I was not aware of the fact it shows what I’m listening to on Spotify until now 💀”

Amanda : “ANGEL WITH A SHOTGUN”

Amanda : “I LOVE THAT SONG”

Adam : “homo”

Lawrence : “Happy pride month 😈”

Peter : “I cant hear you”

Mark : “Did you hear me scream penis”

Peter : “no”

Adam : “😭”

Adam : “I’m dying pleaze halp ma”

Adam : “Hell me plez”

Lawrence : “I can’t I’m sorrryyy”

Adam : “😩😩😩😩🙈”

Adam : “🍇”

Adam : “🇨🇦”

Adam : “🧨”

John : “Explodes”

Mark : “omg”

Mark : “explode deez nuts”

Amanda : “Literally?”

Amanda : “Cuz I just might”

Adam : “Fuckin trauma-“

Amanda : “Trauma? What's that? Never heard of it 👀”

Adam : “Bitch I wish-“

Mark : “ah, trauma. it made me interesting”

Adam : “It made me funny and rude-“

Lawrence : “That's both a good and bad look at it.”

Adam : “everytime someone texts me”

Adam : “this is who their texting”

Adam :

[originemesis]

🤺 - to challenge your muse to a sparring match . // opal wanna spar the boy

Well, when the commander decides that the Exorcist branch needs something as far as training goes to occupy their day in absence of their usual clucky leader who was apparently off spending his afternoon filling the white board walls of Sera's so called 'Adam Punishment Room' with affirmations such as 'I will not whip it out for a Deez Nutz punchline-', Abel is not one to question his choices, even when they involve lining him and a few other mortal members of the Legion up a yard across from where the Exorcist's seemed...to be making a boisterous affair of who stood where in their line as if there were a pecking order to such matters.

He had his doubts, of course- mostly because these sorts of friendly engagements had no place for heavy armor or the guns they usually employed against hell's masses, and though he was assured that Michael wouldn't ask him to be there if he posed the risk of being spotted by his father sans his uniform, well... his blank, gilded gaze remained on a silent swivel- just in case he needed to play the ill recruit and shove his head in the nearest bin. Well, at least they weren't sparring in a bathroom...his mind wanders, a twitch of his temple indicating he was far luckier to be presented with the option of recycling bins over a porcelain bowl that might end up auto flushing like it did the time he'd stopped to tie his shoe a little too close for comfort...the comfort being the experiment behind using the lid as a chin rest while doing so.

It's a snap of fingers administered between the glaze of his expression that clears the muddled gold of its cloud cover, and he straightens his shoulders while peering down at...oh, one of them? Had she sauntered over while he was thinking about toilets?

Awk-ward...

"Hi- yes. Did we get paired for the exercise? I wasn't thinking about when toilets attack if that's what it looked like! That...hard anyway." Honesty in heaven was the best policy...until it wasn't. "

With a nervous laugh and a peeled flutter of grayish blue wings, he slips out the shepherd's cane tucked beneath one and flips it into place along the span of his arm as he waited for her to do the same and meet his engagement stance, but not without parting with the usual sentiment shared between the mortal branch of the Legion when letting their squadron know they were locked in to their task. No more toilet thoughts-

"Ready and able."

[silkythewriter]

JUST SAW THE NEW EP DROPS YALL DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT IM ABT TO COOK UP

[shmorp-mcdurgen]

if adam learned about deez nuts he would never stop saying it (both human adam AND alt adam

YEAH-

Adam: ever heard of Deez?

Mark: what the fuck is-

Adam: Deez NU- (get obliterated)

[silverselfshippingchaos]

A full list of f/o tags!

Maxi: the dandy of the south seas 🌊 🤍

Kyohei: kissing in the van 💍

Aqua: a heaven full of stars 💙❤️

Demyx: kiss water kiss!

Felix: heart-to-heart combat ⚔️

Balthus: king of grappling deez nuts 👊

Shura: skunk time 🦨

Atlas: just call me firewood 🪵🪓

Tibarn: let's eat worms together 🦅

Muarim: i wouldn't dare raise a claw 💚

Haar: i showed you my wyvern please respond 💤

Eizen: earth and fire ☠️

Seifer: your knight until the end 🤍

Basch: my desert flower 🥀

Yaag: let's believe in eternity 💧

Gladio: send (cup) noods tonight 🍜

Vivian: our own hideaway 🔮

Dunban: blossom dance! 🌸

Akhos: the poet and the muse 🖍

Matthew: i'm feeling full of beans 🫘!

Chai: masala te chai ☕️

Vik: you make night city brighter 🌃

Adam: as human as it gets 🦾

Percy: your bullet bullet bullet 🩶🖤

Mr. H: a cup of coffee for the road ☕️?

Rune: steal me away 🐉

Garrus: can't calibrate this one 🌌

Kyojiro: a baker and a criminal walk into a bar...

Shepard: i'm with you until the end 🌌

Platonic F/Os

Dante: let's hunt demons together 🍒

Ignis/Noctis/Prompto: chocobros 🐣

Raines: and we dared to dream 🤍

Eraqus: my dad (boogie woogie woogie)

Riku: star-fruit 💫

All other KH characters: our hearts as one!

Clive: find the flame 🔥

Berseria Party: why do birds fly 🕊?

Turks: black suits ♠️

Zack: puppy eyes 🐶

Van Gang: vroom vroom 🛞

Sylvain: you get it ❤️

Rodrigue: the shield 🛡

Xianghua and Kilik: does your soul still burn 🔥?

general platonic f/o tag: my beloved pals

Crushes

Haurchefant: hot chocolate tonight 🍫?

Kabru: eyes the color of the sky 💙

Akiteru: your #1 fan 🏐

Fjord: my dear captain 🌊

Mikoto: love like fire 🔥❤️

Boromir: one does not simply fall in love 🤏

Kili: Kili tag tbd