#And all I see is dark and violent and even if not in reality

[huenot]

.

[bratbby333]

i will possess your heart – satoru gojo

-this story contains very heavy nsfw content! please read at your own discretion!-

𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪 content warnings dead dove fic- heavy stalking, violent obsession, manipulation, forced voyeurism, forced exhibition, drugging, mentions of blood, knives, use of restraints, plot twist, extreme dub-con 𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪 synopsis for as cocky as Satoru is, it’s oddly fitting. in his mind, everything belongs to him, including you. 𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪 word count 8k

Satoru fumbled with a tripod as he positioned his camera onto the stand and proceeded to hit record. He was thorough, making sure his chair was perfectly centered before he sat down, staring at himself in the viewfinder while he fussed with his hair, inhaling deeply. A wide grin cut across his face before dropping back into lackluster neutrality. He looked down at his lap, his fingers ran up and down his denim-clad thighs. He snapped back onto the camera blank-faced before a deranged smile pulled at his cheeks.

Click

January 16th, 4:06 AM

I woke up drenched in the feeling of lethargy again—another night of only an hour’s worth of sleep. Nothing feels real when you hit a certain point. I’m plagued by the shadows, my entire life enshrouded in darkness. I don’t remember what things were like before. Day by day, it’s all the same. I cannot escape it—this anchoring feeling of despair. The emptiness eats away at me. I’m in search of release…of some sort of freedom from this pain. I need to fill my life with meaning, to find purpose in this accursed world…I think I’ll go out for coffee today. People watching brings me so much joy. They seem to live much happier lives than me.

Click

January 16th, 6:38 PM

My daydreams must’ve blended into reality because there was no way I created someone as beautiful as she was outside my imagination. I’m certain of it. She was sitting at the bar of the cafe down the street from my apartment, dressed in business casual—she probably works nearby. How kismet. The coffee was bland, as were most things in my life, but she awoke something in me. I hope I see her again. She somehow managed to clear the cobwebs around my heart. I think my life has finally found purpose. She is my driving force. I wonder what her name is.

Click

January 19th, 6:11 AM

Feeling well-rested today. Four hours of sleep is my new record. I plan to go to the coffee shop again. Back to the place where my eyes were first blessed with the mirage of her…where I first fell in love. I hope she’s there. People are so fun to observe when they don’t think they’re being watched…it’s simple psychology. The Hawthorne Effect. When humans notice they are under observation, they change. So inauthentic. But her? She never notices. She sits so obliviously, allowing me to take her in with ease. So good to me. She’s a breath of fresh air. I hope to work up the courage to speak to her soon. My heart soars at the mere thought of being in her presence once again. It’s so refreshing to feel something after all this time. I’ve been numb for so long, but she has set my heart on fire. She is everything to me, my sole purpose for existence.

Click

January 19th, 8:27 PM

I saw her again today. She didn’t see me. Just how I like it. She typed away on her computer like normal…she’s a hard worker, it seems. Driven and strong. And here I was thinking such beauty was a thing of legend. It's refreshing to have been proved wrong–that rarely happens. Oh, how I crave her. I know she’d make me feel whole again. She can save me from all this, I can feel it. 

Click

January 23rd, 5:13 AM

Only two hours of sleep tonight. But, for some reason, I feel better than ever… I normally do when I find a reason for living, again. It’s her…it must be because of her. She keeps me going; my muse, my inspiration. She’s worked wonders on me already and she doesn’t even know it, yet. I’m going to the cafe again today, I cannot wait to see her. Maybe today I will finally speak to her.

Click

January 23rd, 9:53 PM

She never showed up today…I wonder what’s going on. Maybe she had other things to do. It’s fine, really. I’m annoyed, honestly. I waited around all day. I’ll keep checking until I see her again. 

Click

January 28th, 7:06 PM

My sweet girl has gone missing. I haven’t seen her in quite some time now. This is just ridiculous. The woman I love…is she avoiding me? No, no that cannot be. 

Click

February 2nd, 8:31 AM

I haven’t slept well in days. I’ve been awake for twenty six hours now…my mind feels like it’s filled with static and yet, I feel sharper than ever. I’ve gone to the cafe every day. Still no sign of her. I’m slipping back into my old ways, the darkness is going to return any moment. I’ve begun to hear the laughter in the shadows again. They’re making fun of me, I just know it. I need her…oh, I need her so bad. How could she do this to me? Does she not know how much I suffer when she’s not around? If I don’t see her again soon, I will never recover.

Click

February 5th, 6:21 PM

I finally saw her again today. My heartrate spiked and I nearly leaped from my seat to kiss her, to hold her, sway her side to side in a deep hug. Instead, I slipped a tracker into her purse as I walked by her chair. I must know where she works, where she lives, and what she enjoys in her free time. She slipped away from me so easily…can’t let that happen again. I need to know every little thing about her. She is my one and only after all. It would be ridiculous to love someone so deeply and know nothing about them. She is too beautiful, I cannot let her wander around unsupervised. There are some crazy people out there—you never know what could happen. I can’t lose her. I must keep her safe. I will possess her heart. No one else can have her but me. 

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.

Satoru observed her for months, shadowing her all around town. He knew the woman’s routine like the back of his hand, before he ever learned her name. Sunday’s she went grocery shopping, Monday after work was her pilates class, every couple of Thursday’s she was at the nail salon, and Friday’s were seemingly payday–he picked up on her pattern of going out to nice restaurants every other week. Satoru eventually got an upper-level management position at a company that shared the office building with her job–he is incredibly intelligent and overqualified, after all; they would be foolish to not hire him. Now he could really keep an eye on her.

That was when he finally learned her name–the two of them taking the same elevator. She didn’t recognize him as the man who seemingly had the same routine as her–it’s one of the many reasons why Satoru loved her so much: her naivety. She looked into his eyes for the first time that day, her voice was soft and angelic, and the name that fell from her lips sent waves through Satoru’s body, the same name that would now be coupled with his gasping moans every evening as he stroked himself to the thought of her. 

With Satoru’s new job that brought him one step closer to her, he knew he could no longer watch her in the way he used to. His movements had to be more calculated, putting more distance between them than he normally would or hiding behind the deep tint of his car windows. If she saw his face too frequently, she surely would have caught on. Satoru smiled at the possibility of her never catching on…how she’d greet him with a smile and a friendly hug each time they “coincidentally” bumped into one another, giggling about their lives' odd synchronicities. Such a sweet girl. If only she knew.

He stopped into her job, a small gift bag hanging off his slender fingers, desperate to watch her eyes light up with the sweet gesture of an unexpected gift. He asked to see her, only to be informed by the receptionist that she had the day off.

It was no worry, he didn’t let that dull his excitement. “I’m a friend of hers, brought this in to surprise her. Do you mind showing me to her desk, I’ll just leave it there for her when she returns to work,” he said kindly. The lady working the front desk blushed under his piercing gaze and handsome features, nodding shyly and walking him to his lover’s designated area. 

Satoru thanked her, stepping into the cubicle to place his gift by her computer. His eyes glazed over her workspace. It was decorated with trinkets and family photos. He picked one up, his thumb tracing over her face. His pretty girl. That smile could bring about world peace; it definitely quieted the angered voices in his head. He scanned her desk, a moment of envy shooting through him at the thought of her dainty fingers dancing over the keyboard rather than tangling in his hair. He groaned internally, looking over his shoulder to ensure no one was around, before ducking down, rummaging through his beloved’s drawers. Stowed away in the bottom of the unit was a fuzzy, white cardigan. He brought the fabric to his nose, inhaling deeply, stifling the filthy moan that nearly echoed through the cubicle. He quickly tucked it into his jacket, took one last look around, and headed toward the exit. 

In the safety of his vehicle, Satoru whipped the clothing out from under his wing, bringing it to his face once more. He undid his belt buckle with haste, shoving his dress slacks halfway down his thighs before his large fist swaddled his cock with the fuzzy white cardigan. He nearly sobbed at the contact, the smell of his car filling with her beautifully floral perfume. He brought the free edge up to his nose, taking another whiff as his hand worked furiously against his shaft. He had never finished so quickly in his life, staggered whimpers and choked moans fell from his parted lips as fat ropes shot up onto his abs and chest. His cheeks were flustered a violent red as he wiped his sticky shame away with her top. After he came, then did his clarity, and Satoru’s body ached with the thought of how good it would feel to finally be sheathed within her sticky walls, rather than her soft clothing. I’ll be with you soon. Soon, my love. 

These feelings were getting unbearable. His overactive brain had him teetering on the edge of insanity. He needed more. His imagination was no longer enough to satiate the hunger that gnawed so deeply in his core, the distanced watching and hopeless longing for the love of his life created jagged rifts in his already damaged psyche. He didn’t know how much more of this he could take. A few deep breaths and the promise he made to himself to take action soon quelled his burning desire. But for how much longer could Satoru repress the demon that clawed through his body?

Satoru surveyed her while she ran to the bank, walked her dog, or took her car to the wash. But his most favorite place to watch her was from the bench just outside her bedroom window, engulfed in darkness. Pretty girl lived on the second floor, her silly little brain assumed she didn’t need curtains. She never saw him, but he always saw her. All of her. Drinking in the way her clothes were delicately removed from her pretty little frame, the way she turned and posed in the mirror–so good to him. How her skin glistened after she got out of the shower, the water droplets running along her body in the same way Satoru wanted to. 

He fell into a state of bliss, feeling spoiled by the show he was getting tonight. The lotion that she worked into her body, the beautiful set of lingerie that she dawned. His eyes buzzed around his sockets, elation flooding through him. Gorgeous, gorgeous girl. But his body went rigid and his jaw locked tight at the appearance of another man behind the love of his life. He sat upright, shoulders stiff and heart pounding in his ears at the thought of his sweet being in danger, he cursed himself for not being more aware of her surroundings on her behalf. But when his darling girl turned to the unknown man with a smile, greeting him with a gentle kiss with the lips that were supposed to be just for Satoru, his heart shattered into a million pieces. 

Oh, no. This just won’t do, my love. You are mine. 

Jealousy coursed through his veins while he looked into her room, rage balled in his fists as he watched a random man have her in the one way Satoru couldn’t. Not yet, at least. He must’ve been new in her life, judging by the way his nervous hands explored every part of her skin. Satoru laughed at this–he knew he could please his woman so much better. But betrayal nipped at the back of his neck; how could she do this to him? Had his loyalty fallen on unappreciative shoulders? No, that couldn’t be. Satoru knew she was better than that, he picked her for a reason, after all. She was just playing hard to get. 

You rejected my advances and desperate pleas, and now you throw your relationship in my face. It’s punishment enough that I can’t have you, but I won't let you let me down so easily.

Feeling at a loss, swallowed whole by his hungered desperation, he did what any rational person would. He moved in next door.

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.

Satoru Gojo was your next-door neighbor. He moved in only a few months after you did. You were elated, chalking it up to a lucky roll of the dice that you had met by chance at your job; he had started working for the company that shared the office park with yours. It really seemed like things were on the come-up for you. He was kind, confidently intuitive, funny, and supportive. Mildly egotistical, but it worked for him. He always invited you over for dinner and movie nights and was a strong, dependable shoulder for you to cry on. You had just moved to the city, feeling utterly lost and absolutely gutted about being so far from your support systems now, and he was your first friend. You felt safe knowing he was just a wall away. 

On a random Sunday, you opened your front door to see all the food you loved sitting at your doorstep–weird, you were just about to leave for the store. You turned your head, seeing Satoru peeking out from his cracked door, grinning at you. 

“Was this you, Satoru? You didn’t have to…this is incredibly thoughtful,” you beamed, stepping over the grocery bags to give him a tight hug. “You’re the best, I don’t know how I could ever repay you.” But Satoru did, he knew exactly what you could do for him.

When you needed a ride to work, he jumped in to save you. The two of you worked in the same building after all. It was a crazy coincidence that your new neighbor turned best friend worked just a few floors above you. It’s such a small world, isn’t it? But it worked out perfectly for the two of you. 

There was a month where you were short on rent, and there was Satoru, paying the rest on your behalf. 

You weren’t catching on. Sweet, naive girl. Oh, how he loved you. I need to work harder to get her attention.

Satoru was not a patient man, but for you, he would do anything and everything to get you right where he wanted you, expertly playing the long game. It began with the fated sighting of you sitting in a cafe, and snowballed into something bigger. At first, he only ever observed you, maybe the minor occasion of overstepping, but as time went on, he couldn’t sit idly by. It was time to make his move.

His disruptions in your life started inconspicuously. Leaving for a date? You found your car tires slashed and windows shattered in the parking deck. Now there’s a police investigation. Bummer…gotta cancel the date. Had a guy over? Satoru’s apartment flooded. Weird… that was the second time this month. 

“You gotta talk to the landlord about this, ‘Toru,” you sighed. He had to stay at yours that evening. 

You cried on his shoulder, telling him that some guy stood you up on a date you had been anticipating for weeks. There was an electrical fire in that man’s apartment that night. Must’ve been faulty wiring...or something.

His apartment flooded again. He was back at your door. You welcomed him with open arms, of course. He’s so good to you, the least you could do is help him out, as well. 

Satoru, you’re slipping. That’s too many times in one month. Ease up or she’ll catch on.

Friday night, in a wild happenstance, he bumped into you while you were out with another man, enjoying a nice dinner together. He smiled warmly at the two of you, before politely dismissing himself. His cheery smile dropped into a demented grin once he stepped out of the restaurant as he anonymously called in a bomb threat to the establishment. You were so shaken up at the entire ordeal you practically begged Satoru to stay with you that night. He’d be a fool to turn you down.

Satoru got everything he wanted. You were just a tough nut to crack, is all. No big deal. He loved a challenge. After all, how could you not love him by now?

But nothing was working. You couldn’t catch the hint, even with everything he threw at you. He was always the one there for you, even when you weren’t aware of it. What more could he do to prove that he was the only person you needed? I’m reliable, witty, and loving… how can she not see this? He finally snapped. The last straw? Hearing your pleasure-filled cries while getting fucked by another man, your “boyfriend”. The lewd sounds ricocheted around your room, shooting through the thin walls of your apartment and straight into his listening ears.

Tsk, tsk. Now you’ve done it. Always been such a tease. 

For as cocky as he was, it’s oddly fitting. In his mind, everything belonged to him, including you. And with that, his demented plan was in full effect. He had hoped to spare you, prayed that you would fall in love with him before he lost his composure completely. But your sweet, naive nature had proved to be a difficult wall to break down. 

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.

Click

The sound of your front door’s lock disengaging echoed through the empty hallway. Satoru stepped in, inhaling deeply as he shoved your house key into his back pocket. It was far easier to gain access into your home than he had originally anticipated; he was fully prepared to break in, but all he had to do was tell your landlord you went out of town and you forgot to leave a key with him before you left. The manager of your apartment complex knew how close you and Satoru were, so it was an easy lie to tell. But it couldn’t have been further from the truth. You weren’t out of town, he wasn’t house sitting, and you had no intentions of having company this evening.

Seated at your desk, he opened your laptop and navigated his way to your iMessage settings, ensuring you could only send and receive texts from your laptop. Clicking on the messaging app, he stifled the gag that threatened to escape his throat as he clicked on the thread between you and your boyfriend, his contact name “my love” in your phone. He rolled his eyes, before drafting a quick text: 

-Hey, baby. I have a half-day at work today…dinner and wine at my place tonight? ;)

He grinned at the quickness of your boyfriend’s response.

-I would love that. What time, my love?

Satoru scoffed at the pet name. He doesn’t deserve to call you that. Poor bastard needed to learn his place. Heat rose in his chest, jealousy emanating through his skin as he crafted his response.

-3pm…Can’t wait to see you.

Everything was going according to plan. Satoru glanced at the clock beside him: 11:17 AM. It was time to get set up, he had a big day planned for you, and his first guest would be arriving in a few short hours. 

A knock rang through the apartment as Satoru finished lighting his final candle. He smiled wide, sauntering over to the door. He swung it open, grinning politely at your boyfriend. “...Hey, man…didn’t expect to see you here…” he said warily as Satoru stood to the side and gestured him in, a quizzical look painted on your partner’s face as he stepped through the doorway. The door shut and the lock was reengaged. “Where’s…” but before he could get his question out, his chin was met with Satoru’s right fist.

Satoru made quick work of dragging his body upstairs. He dug through the unconscious man’s pants, pulling out his cellphone. Satoru was disgusted to see that you were his lockscreen. This pitiful man wasn’t worthy enough to be with you. He rolled his eyes, unlocking the man’s phone and sending you a text: 

-Hey, beautiful. Come straight home tonight. I’m making dinner for us. See you when you get off work.

You smiled at the familiar ding of your phone, the notification effectively distracting you from your tedious paperwork. Your heart soared at the message, sighing deeply and shifting your weight around in your office chair. Your hand rubbed at your face in an attempt to hide your blushing cheeks. 

“What is it?” your coworker asked. 

“Oh, nothing. I thought my boyfriend forgot our anniversary cause I hadn’t heard from him all day…but he just texted me saying he’s at my place and is making dinner for us tonight.” A giddy smile couldn’t help but drag across your face. 

Satoru looked at the clock: 3:28 PM. You would be home in an hour or so. Just a few more things had to be done, everything had to be perfect.

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.

Your heart rate spiked as you got closer to your apartment door, keys jingling against your palm as you fumbled with the lock, excitement making your movements a bit clumsier than usual. You entered and kicked off your heels, and as you turned to toss your keys onto the small table in your foyer, you noticed a small card that said “Read Me” placed perfectly in the center of the tray. You were perplexed as your eyes scanned over the note. “Go to the living room” was all it said.

You blushed, a nervous smile pulling at the edge of your lips as you crept to the other room. Your eyes went wide at the sight; deep red roses were placed in the center of the coffee table and every accessible surface around the couch was adorned with beautifully flickering candles. Another note was on the table, your fingers fumbled with the edge of the card as you opened it: “Have a seat, take a sip, and press play.” You settled on the couch, noticing a glass of alluring red wine to the right of the roses. You took a few deep, fulfilling swigs of your drink before grabbing the TV remote. Your face twisted a bit, examining the glass in your hand, the flavor of wine different than the one you were used to. It was a special night after all, your thoughtful boyfriend must have wanted you to branch out this evening. Where is he, anyway? As you pressed play, you called out for him, only to be cut off by your own confusion as Satoru’s face appeared on your TV screen. You watched with perplexity as Satoru recentered his chair, smiled, relaxed his face, and then smiled again.

No…no, no, no. What is this? You were locked in place, the melodious sounds of Satoru’s voice cascaded out of your surround sound system. He looked different though, his eyes were dull and low, his voice monotonous–his alarming difference in demeanor sent a chill down your spine. Your groggy mind inferred that this must’ve been an accident. Maybe it was casted to the wrong TV. I shouldn’t be seeing this…these are Satoru’s video diaries. 

You so badly wanted to tear your eyes away from the screen, this seemed like such an invasion of privacy. But you were entranced, staring intently toward the TV, though you didn’t really have a choice, your body was completely numb now. 

“January 16th, 4:06 AM

I woke up drenched in the feeling of lethargy again—another night of only an hour’s worth of sleep. Nothing feels real when you hit a certain point…” you fought to keep your eyes open, to piece together what the hell was happening, until your body eventually succumbed to sleep.

When you finally came to, you were laid out on your bed, fully nude. Soft grunts lingered in the air as you worked your hardest to refocus your eyes, your head pounding. You shifted your weight onto your forearms, your neck straining as it felt like your brain was filled with lead, eyes searching your bedroom for the culprit of the moans. One glance to the left, a quick look to the right, before you stared straight ahead at the wall directly across from the bed. Your body lurched in fear as your heart sank, the source of the sounds now looking you dead in the eyes: The man you had been seeing for the past couple of months, gagged and tied to a chair, his bloodied face twisted up in agony. 

You tried to call out for him. Your feeble attempts to drag your heavy body closer in order to console him were interrupted as the room was suddenly illuminated with the streaming lights of a projector. Your movements halted as you shielded your eyes immediately, the bright interruption feeling like a flashbang to your sensitive head. 

“We didn’t get to finish my show and tell,” a voice spoke up from the dark corner. 

“Satoru?? Wha…what is going on?” you cried out, tears spilling from your eyes while your hands attempted to cover your modesty. You tried your hardest to sit upright, your head spinning, unsure if Satoru was the culprit or your savior. Your body felt like it was anchored to the floor, your head throbbing with every word that tore through your chest. 

“There’s no need for all that yelling, sweetheart,” Satoru grinned, crouching down next to you. You winced as his hand cupped the side of your face, his thumb brushing away the tears that trickled down your cheeks. 

Click

Metal cuffs clamped down on your wrists before you could even register what was happening. A million unanswered questions spun through the room as you frantically searched through his blue eyes, hoping to find any sort of insight into the torment he was inflicting upon the two of you. 

“This is what’s gonna happen, okay? I need you to listen to me.” His voice was sickeningly sweet, each syllable that left his lips more damning than the last as he dragged your limp body up the bed, securing your wrists to the headboard and angling your body toward the projected video on your wall. A crazed grin lit up his dull face as he raised his hand, pointing the remote toward the projector. “You’re gonna sit here and look all pretty f’me while you watch these tapes, and if you move, if you stop paying attention for even a second…” Your stomach churned at how gently he was able to give such vile instructions. He turned his attention towards your partner, the blade of a knife twirling through the slender fingers of his free hand, “...He’s dead. Understand, angel?” 

You nodded reluctantly, unable to do anything else but comply with his demands. Your head was spinning, trying to digest the fact that this was the same person who had paid your rent and entertained your rants after a hard day of work. You listened as his voice continued to drabble over the static of the projector, recalling how bland that day had been until he saw your face. How he must’ve dreamt of you because there was no way your beauty could exist outside of his imagination. To you, it had been a normal Tuesday afternoon. To him, it had been the start of the rest of his life. 

The longer you watched, the more the realization set in that the sweet gestures he presented to you were not out of the goodness of his heart, but from the darkness of his spirit, driven by his wanton lust. Your face was slack, eyes wide in horror. Disappointment crawled through your chest at your own naivety. How could I be so oblivious? So trusting? 

Satoru’s eyes bored into the side of your face as he sat beside you, his hands rubbing deep circles into your bare thighs, pure elation shooting through his veins at his sweet girl finally having a look into his mind. The look of terror that painted your beautiful face made his heart leap with joy. Satoru’s giddy demeanor dropped as pained grunts emerged from the tethered man against the wall. He stood, closing the distance between the two of them, his fist encircling your boyfriend’s throat. You began to protest, to plead with Satoru to leave him be, but the rage that filled his eyes made you shut your mouth. “Uh uh…eye’s on the screen, my love.” Your head snapped back toward the videos, fat tears rolling down your cheeks as the muffled wailing of your boyfriend filled the room. 

As the final video played, Satoru returned to your side, kneeling on the edge of the bed as he  stroked the back of your head and rubbed at your cheeks. “Can’t you see all that I’ve done for you?” He grabbed your face, digging his fingers deep into the space under your cheekbones, forcing your lips into a pucker. “You belong to me, my love.” A deep growl rumbled through his chest, “You look so fucking beautiful like this.” He leaned down and crashed his lips into yours, his hot tongue bullying its way through your tight lips. Small whines echoed through your mouth and into his, and Satoru greedily swallowed up your sounds with ease. Whimpers of protest came from the wall across from your bed, but they were quickly drowned out by the wet sounds of smacking lips and battling tongues.

He broke away, a thick trail of spit still connecting the two of you. Satoru released your cheeks with a gentle shove, throwing his leg over yours to straddle you. He dropped his head to your neck, his white hair brushing against your skin. You winced as he licked a thick line from your collarbone to your ear. “I finally get to have you,” he whispered, nipping at your flesh, “You ready to give yourself to me, princess?” Your eyes widened in horror, your gaze affixed towards your boyfriend, blood trickling from the fresh cuts on his cheeks. Your head shook side to side, tears brimming in your eyes once more as your thoughts raced through your mind, causing a traffic jam in your throat. “I…no, I can’t…he’s…” Satoru’s palm covered your mouth, a groan erupting from the back of his throat as his eyes rolled deep into his skull. He sat back, staring down at you, his free hand running its fingertips between your breasts. “This has nothing to do with him…It’s just me and you now, my love.” Your head snapped up to stare at your captor as the rough pads of his fingers brushed over your nipples. A stifled moan teased the back of your throat, an exasperated look of fear in your eyes as you stared up at Satoru.

Your cheeks flushed as you held his gaze. He grinned back down at you before rolling the hardened bud between his fingertips. Your chest arched toward him, a shameful hum dancing from your lips as he played with you. A deep laugh erupted from the blue-eyed man at your unintentional reaction, his head thrown back with pure joy as he continued to pull at your nipples. He leaned into your neck once more, his teeth grazing the outer shell of your ear. “I knew it,” he purred, “Knew you wanted me, too. You were just playing hard to get, isn’t that right?” You shook your head once more, your words constricted in your chest. “N-no…I never wanted you,” you retorted, head thrown to the side, attempting to distance yourself from him, but to no avail. The weight of him anchored your lower half to the mattress while your tethered wrists held you in place.

A deep chuckle rumbled through Satoru, “So if I feel your pussy, it won’t be absolutely soaked right now?” A pathetic whimper escaped your throat as you shook your head furiously. The rolling motion against your nipples halted and his hand trailed lower down your abdomen. “Hmm…let’s see then, shall we?” he taunted, tracing your skin before rubbing your folds and dipping into your core. “I knew it…you’re fucking drenched f’me, sweetheart.” He shoved two fingers in, shallowly teasing your hole before withdrawing, bringing his sopping digits between your faces, turning his wrist as the dim light of the room illuminated the wetness, making it glisten ever so slightly. He examined them before meeting your fearful gaze. “Why did you lie?” He sucked his middle digit into his mouth, his tongue lapping hungrily at your sweet juices as his eyes fluttered shut. A hum emanated from Satoru as his other soaked finger pushed past your lips, “Here, have a taste, pretty girl,” his long digit dancing around your tongue. “So fucking sweet. You have no idea how badly I’ve been craving this.” 

“I’ll ask you again, princess…Why’d you lie to me? I thought you were better than that,” he teased, an insincere pout twitching at his lips as he cradled your chin. Your body thrashed as his hands pawed down your body, plunging two fingers deep inside you again. Your back arched toward him, his knee between your legs was the only thing keeping you open for him. “I…It wasn’t..ahh!– I wasn’t lying…I–”. Your words fell on deaf ears as a wicked smile crept across Satoru’s face.

“Shhh…shhh my sweet girl, just lay back and enjoy,” he smirked as he crawled down your body, laying himself flat on the bed with his head nestled between your legs. Satoru’s body no longer shielded you from your boyfriend, your teary eyes darted across his face, a silent apology being sent his way. Small gasps escaped your lips as Satoru continued to pump into you, the tips of his curled fingers toying with your sweet spot. When you stared down at him, the look of pure desire peered back at you, the dampness between your legs skyrocketing at the sight. A scarlet dusting of shame brushed across your cheeks at your clear enjoyment of all this, even though it betrayed every natural instinct you had. His tongue darted out from between his lips, the tip circling your swollen clit as his fingers dipped in and out of you, his movements spurred on by his own desperation.

He was delirious, suckling against your clit while his fingers worked into you with fervor, moans and growls echoing through the room as he drank you in. You so badly wanted to break away, to console your boyfriend who had an unintentional front row seat to you falling apart on someone else’s tongue, but you couldn't bring yourself to stop him, his digits hitting spots inside you that you didn’t even know existed. Pleasure ripped through your body as a tightening sensation crept its way into your stomach. The rattling of your cuffs echoed through your bedroom as you fought against your restraints, desperately wanting to tangle your fingers in Satoru’s hair.

Your hips bucked toward his mouth, your body aching for release as your pelvis thrusted against his flattened tongue. You didn’t dare look away from Satoru, for you knew there was another set of eyes affixed upon the damning scene that was unfolding. He continued to hum and suck and pump into your core as you tightened around him, his slender fingers quickly coaxing your orgasm from your writhing body. Your eyes screwed shut as your gushy walls spasmed around his fingers, your release painting Satoru’s overly-eager face. He lapped at you some more, working you through your orgasm as he cleaned you up with his wickedly talented tongue. 

A deep growl broke through Satoru’s chest as he removed his head from between your legs, the back of his hand dragging across his chin, catching the last of your release before he licked you off of him. He sat upright, craning his neck to look over his shoulder, “Hope you were taking notes,” a smug grin on his face as he addressed your watching boyfriend. He redirected his attention to you. “Did so good f’me, angel. Dreamt of that for so long…” he grinned, his tongue darting out to trace along his lips, hoping there was still some of you coating his face “...I could do that all fuckin’ day.” 

Your shaking chest heaved as clarity settled into your mind. Satoru untethered your wrists from the headboard, shifting your body so that you were on your hands and knees, head positioned toward the wall your partner was leaning against. Strangled sounds rang from your boyfriend’s chest as you finally met his gaze. Humiliation prickling under your skin at the realization of what you had just done. But you had no time to dwell on it as Satoru repositioned himself on the bed.

“He’s gonna watch me destroy you, my sweet girl,” Satoru was kneeled behind you, lining himself up with your embarrassingly soaked entrance. He grasped your hips roughly, sinking into you in one fluid motion. You choked out a sob as you dropped your head in shame.

“You’re so pretty when you cry. He can’t help you…can’t save you. Go ‘head, keep cryin’ for him,” he cooed, his thrusts deep and slow inside of you. Jagged moans escaped your throat as the thick head of his cock brushed into your sweet spot. “He can’t make you feel as good as I do.”

He leaned down, reaching around to cradle your throat in his hand, squeezing tightly as he turned your head to the side, his sharp eyes running up and down your contorted face. “Can’t you see that you belong to me, how my poor heart aches for you? How badly I’ve needed you?” His thrusts were agonizingly slow but incredibly deep, the pressure in your tummy betraying your desire for this to stop. “That’s it, my love. Feel you clenching down on me…you’re getting off on this, aren’t ya?” His hips rocked deeper into you, the new depth had your hands clawing at the sheets of your bed as pleasure worked its way through your trembling body.

“He doesn’t treat you the way I do. He never will. No one is better for you than me, princess,” he seethes, his hand cupping your chin, holding your head up, “Now look in his eyes while I use you.” His pace picked up, pulling you back on to him with his anchored hand around your neck. A broken sob cut through your constricted throat as he fucked into you, the visceral sound of flesh smacking against flesh and whines and cries spun through the otherwise stiff air of your room. He palmed at the fat of your ass, pulling your body to meet his rough thrusts. A choked cry left your lips as you maintained eye contact with your boyfriend, crimson droplets running down his face, mimicking the pattern of your tears. You mouthed a silent “I’m sorry” to him before your eyes shut tightly, waves of sinful bliss pulsed through your body with every mean thrust of Satoru’s hips.

“Gettin’ so tight around me–f-fuuuck–you’re close, huh?” Your face contorted in shameful pleasure as you nodded, your back arching even more to take him deeper. “That’s it…c’mon, my love. Need you to cum on my cock,” Satoru begged, his voice airy as he got lost in your tight, sopping walls. “Show me how good I make you feel.” His words ricocheted around your head as the building pressure in your stomach finally snapped, your legs shaking violently as your orgasm ripped through your body, splattering onto Satoru’s thighs and the mattress below you. 

A few more strokes met your dripping center before Satoru bottomed out inside of you, thick ropes of his pearlescent seed painting your spasming walls. He finally released his tight grip around your throat, your head dropping immediately as indignity plagued your trembling frame. He pulled out, spreading your cheeks as he leaned down, an animalistic growl pulling from his chest as he watched his cum dribble out of your pussy. 

Satoru rubbed soothing circles into your lower back as you worked to regain your breath. “You’re mine,” he whispered. He unlatched the restraints from around your wrists, a coy smile tugging at the corners of his mouth at the purple bruises that marked your skin. He locked eyes with your boyfriend, a deranged smile dancing across his face as he reached for the discarded projector remote. 

Another familiar voice flooded through the speaker, but this time it wasn’t Satoru’s. “...We broke up a few weeks ago. No, no. Really, it’s okay. She was kind of a bitch anyway.” Your pupils widened as you stared back at the man you had just been feeling sorry for minutes ago, rage mixing into the vast sea of emotions you were already feeling while you watched a grainy video of him snaking his arm around another woman’s waist. The two of them were laughing outside of his house before she leaned in to kiss him. 

“My poor sweet girl.” Satoru’s hand brushed lightly against your cheeks, catching tears that you didn’t even realize had begun spilling out. “I didn’t want you to have to find out this way, but I didn’t have much of a choice, did I?”

There were a million other ways he could have broken the news to you, but that somehow wasn’t the most pressing issue at hand. 

“An eye for an eye, right?” The same haunting grin that you’d grown to know all too well spread across his face again, his blue eyes slicing into your ex-boyfriend’s. “I can’t believe that my entire world was in the hands of someone so undeserving…” he redirected his attention back to you and recaptured your cheeks in his hands. He leaned down to meet your gaze, unexpected softness replacing his usual sinister demeanor. “What do we do now, baby? It’s your call.”

Your pulse was ringing through your ears. “My call?” your voice was reduced to a whisper as you repeated it back to him. 

“I’m going to kill him either way, but I want you to tell me how.”

You pondered for a moment, still coming to terms with the chain of events that lead you to this one vengeful moment. 

Satoru stood, sauntering over to your boyfriend, stooping down to his level while his hands hovered over his gag. “When I take this off, I don’t want to hear anything other than remorse come from that pathetic fuckin’ mouth of yours.” Your boyfriend’s eyes shifted towards you, then back to Satoru, as he nodded pitifully. The tie was pulled from his mouth. His words were broken, barely audible. “I’m -” he choked out. “I’m sorry, I -”

Your stomach lurched as a sharp smack met his cheek, the painful sound resonating through the room. “You can do better than that. You got one more try,” Satoru spat, his eyes burning into your ex-lover’s bloodied face as he wrapped his fist around his throat, jostling his head around in a fit of rage. 

“Satoru,” you hardly recognized your tone let alone the thoughts that were racing through your head. The last few hours of your life had been a blur. The words you heard earlier made perfect sense now, “Nothing feels real when you hit a certain point.” You were officially at that point. “Satoru, don’t. Let’s just end this.”

It was the first time you’d ever seen the silver-haired man look surprised. His eyebrow raised, a mix of curiosity and amusement glinting in his eye. “Tell me how,” he repeated. “I need to hear you say it.” 

You were in a dream. Nothing more than a figment of Satoru’s imagination, just like he had said. It was the only thing that made sense to you because there was no way any of this was actually happening. 

“Rip his heart out,” your voice emotionless as you gazed toward the blue-eyed man. Satoru groaned deeply, his dick twitching at the sound of your pretty voice speaking his dark language. The same depraved grin pulled at the edge of his lips as he looked back at your ex. 

“Well,” he smirked, “looks like it’s decided then…” Adoration swam through his ocean eyes as he looked back at you, “I knew I picked the right one.”

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.

Click

The lock of your front door unbolted as your bodies pushed through the door frame, giggling as four glasses of wine danced through your systems. Satoru wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you into a deep, passionate kiss. “Happy anniversary, my love,” he mumbled against your lips. His hands grasped yours as he led you toward the couch. 

You nestled into the warmth of his chest, his arm secured around you while you gazed around the room. Your head spun from the wine-induced nostalgia that this day had inevitably brought on. You were still in the same apartment, only it belonged to both of you now. A blend of sentimental gifts decorated your bookshelf that the two of you had collected over the last year. A camcorder, pressed red roses, framed vacation photos, and the first set of diamond earrings he’d bought you stowed away in a heart-shaped jewelry box. But out of all of the memories that tied you together, there was one that stood out the most. 

“Should we open it?” you whispered, drawing lazy circles into his shoulder.

You didn’t have to see his face to feel his smirk. He knew his girl and he knew her well. He stood wordlessly, retrieving a jar from the highest shelf. He presented it to you, a smug grin gracing his ethereal features, the same look that was permanently etched into your brain the night he got it for you. 

“Be my guest, princess.” You unscrewed the lid, peering into the jar as the strong scent of formaldehyde tickled your nose. You smiled longingly into the container, the overwhelming feeling of love reverberating through your chest. There was something so beautifully poetic about Satoru’s limerence, the lengths at which he went to steal the heart of another in order to fully possess yours. 

author note: im so sorry for not posting my sweets,, i had the worst case of writer's block and i was actively trying to work on six different WIPs...i was losing my mind.

this was quite the heavy fic to write...i hope i didn't scare anyone away with it lol

alsoooo!! sending out the biggest thank you to @remlionheart for forcing me to finish this...my editor, my co-writer, the love of my life ♡ ⋆｡˚

© bratbby333 on tumblr. all rights reserved. please do no distribute. 2024.

[yandere-sins]

You know how, irl, people get fascinated and turned on by the IDEA Of a yandere? And how a yandere, ofc, stalks and learns as much as they can about their darling? I just imagine the Yandere using that to their advantage and to their Darling's horror. "Oh, but you like this don't you? You've read so many smutty tumblr stories about being taken and taken and held hostage. You reblogged so many headcanons about a character killing your bully or that co-worker you hate. I know all your questionable porn tastes. I know all your deep, dark secrets. I know your violent vent posts that I got to enact for you, Darling! I've given you everything you've ever fantasized about, so of course you'll love me. <3" And of course, the yandere fails to realize that any of those behaviors or actions in real life is absolutely, gut-wrenchingly horrifying. But they think they're giving their darling everything they could ever want, and they'll continue to do so until they stop playing hard to get.

Ngl, probably one of my worst fears for the future, but thanks for requesting because it makes good yandere content :'D

I'm imagining a really smug yandere, you know? One that thinks they are doing you such a big favor and give you all their love by expressing it this way. But in reality, they don't even realize how messed up it is.

They were just breaking into your home after you went to bed to admire their darling from afar for a little bit. They are not daring to stir you from your sleep when they can stand beside you and watch. It is enough; they won't be greedy. But they couldn't have known they'd find the holy grail of smut and depravity on your bookshelf when they started browsing as their curiosity got the better of them. They are almost appalled by their darling, if not for the fact that when they browse through the pages of a random book, the words kidnapping, stalking, love, murder, and quite a few more seem like a temptation made for them especially.

So, you actually like that kind of stuff, huh?

Someone following you on a dark street, their steps noticeable but their face masked as they are always just five steps behind you. You run, they run. There's a red rose on your windowsill the next day. It scares you, but they know now that you are just pretending. That your heart is beating faster now, elated by the chase and the promise of love it brings. The fact that you have your own mad person excites you. The yan continues to borrow one book after the other, annotates them, and takes notes for themselves before putting them back onto your shelf for you to find one day, horrified to see lots of "I'd love to do this to you," "How about I kill the coworker you hate—would that make you love me?" and "Love this, love you, always you" in them.

They thought being a silent observer, loving you from afar, was the way to be with you. But they can't help but masturbate to the sex scenes, thinking about how they'd reenact them with you. Your books will be devastatingly ruined by stains and tears in the pages as they have either ripped out a scene to save for later or bit into the book as they've hit their orgasm. Your bookshelf was a collection of dark romance before, but now it is literally the remnant of a massacre of the once neat collection.

But of course, they won't stop there.

Everyone gets sick of reading books someday, even though it's been nice doing it sitting next to you—part of the yan hoping you might wake up and they get to act out some of the scenes you read about. However, there are more things to uncover and learn from. Your public social media they've stalked so far was nice and dandy, but the favorites and posts you hide on your private computer have so much potential to learn from.

The yan can learn about all these little desires of yours. The masks you like, how you want to be taken, cared for, and loved forever. You seem to believe in soulmates—crazy! They do, too! If the yan is delusional enough, it turns out that you two are so similar to each other—a perfect match. Even the kinks they didn't share with you before can be arranged with enough dedication to you. They'll make preparations so you'll be able to ease into these depraved things that you kept hidden from them. You might have been afraid to act on your desires, but the yan is ready to let you live them out to the fullest.

Never mind that you cry after being chased home, it's what you wanted, right? It doesn't matter how you actually feel when they harass and stalk you, leave you little notes and flowers everywhere, because they are just doing what your book-partners would do (it worked for them, after all). You wanted the yan to be possessive over you; why are you sad that no one wants to be your friend when the yan went to the trouble of making sure everyone would be too scared to approach you? And really, aren't you grateful for the yan taking care of your coworker problem? Was sending you their pinky not enough proof of their love?

How come you don't love them yet? When will you love them like the protagonists of your books?

Haven't they done enough? Are you seriously saying you don't like their gifts and dedication to you? Or perhaps you are just trying to play hard to get... of course! That must be it. You are so lovely; you must know that you deserve to be desired immensely. Only they can desire you as much as to go to such lengths, but perhaps it hasn't been enough yet. You deserve more. You are waiting for the yan to prove their undying, absolute love for you. It must be something big, something extraordinary. Something that will show you just how much they care about your interests and especially you.

They will take you and give you the life you want—you deserve.

Even if you hate them for it.

[forcemeanakin]

Hot with brains

•WARNINGS: SMUT.  Fingering (f receiving), oral fixation, dirty talk, praise kink and also degrading kink, corruption kink kinda??? Edging. Public space. The OC has a kink that attracts her to smart guys.

Pairing: ROTS!Anakin Skywalker x Female!reader.

Summary: Anakin falls for the librarian at the Jedi Temple, however, he soon realizes his adorable smile and golden curls won’t cut it with this one. No, she likes something different: brains. 

Word count: 4.7K. 

A/N: Pretty self-indulgent piece. I've been obsessed with Anakin's engineering brain ever since I got into Star Wars and this idea had be floating around for a whileeeee. Hope you all enjoy reading it, as much as I enjoyed writing it!

————————————————————————

You liked smart guys. 

It wasn’t a kink per sé. You just couldn’t see yourself hooking up with someone with no brains, let alone establishing a committed relationship with them. You were swoon by guys with deep thoughts and admirable speech skills. The type of man that would go for a whisky instead of a beer, or use real shoes instead of plain sneakers.

You being a snob might have to do with your upbringing, after all you were the daughter of two scholars and professors of one of the most prestigious universities of Coruscant. You were raised to be logical and love intellectual conversations. You wouldn’t- No. You couldn’t see yourself enjoying a space with someone with a low IQ.

That was the reasoning behind taking the internship in the Jedi Temple’s library as part of your college voluntary program. You had to volunteer a certain amount of hours in order to graduate from your Journalism degree with honors. 

You thought that even though this wasn’t exactly the area in which you were specializing, you would soak up some of the ancient knowledge of the Order, even make some great connections for the future. And so far it has been just that: A great experience. You got to read some really cool books and in the hours where no one would come, you got to finish some school work. The Jedi who would visit the library were nice and kind, always polite with a big smile. You even grew really fond of a young Togruta padawan that would spend her breaks in between training devouring books. 

It was calm and quiet. 

Until the storm broke through the door.

“Is this the one you’re looking for?” You yelled to Ahsoka as you climbed down the stairs with the title she asked for.

“Yes! Thank you, y/n!” She gave you a hug and ran to her table to start reading about the swamps in Dagobah.

You returned to your desk and kept registering the book’s codes into the control sheet when a loud sound made you look to the door, the one that was violently being thrown to open room for a tall, curly-haired man with dark robes.

You would recognize those robes anywhere. In reality, anyone from any point of the galaxy would recognize them.

Anakin Skywalker. 

One of the few exceptions of Jedi men who didn’t live up to the sophisticated standard of the Order’s image. And definitely someone you would prefer to stay away from. For some reason he was the favorite warrior of the people; the citizens would line up in front of the Temple to scream “Hero with no fear” to that pretentious douchebag.

He was fine. 

As what most people would call courageous, you would say careless. To others he was passionate, to you he was irrational. Not to mention how idiotic and unsubordinated he was; always talking back and doing things his way, ignoring what the guidelines said.

You didn’t like him. You didn’t like him at all. For that you were thankful that he never set foot into your sacred place. Until that doomed day.

“C’mon, Snips.” He shouted, approaching the desk where she sat. “We need to go. Council just called.”

“Can I have five more minutes? I’ve barely read anything about where we are going!” Ahsoka whined.

“You don’t need to read anything, we will find out anything that’s necessary there.” He huffed, finding his apprentice’s actions ridiculous. 

You quietly sighed and rolled my eyes. Of course.

“Fine… but y/n really took her time fetching it for me.” She exhaled annoyed and closed the book. 

Your eyes remained glued to your task at hand, not willing to look up and be involved in some type of pending argument.

“Who’s y/n?” Anakin scoffed rather loudly.

“Y/n! The volunteer?” Anakin frowned at the short explanation and shook his head in a negative motion. “You know, y/n! C’mon Skyguy, follow me.”

No, please no, you whispered to your insides.

“Hey, y/n!” You heard Ahsoka’s little footsteps running to where you were. 

“What can I do for you, Soka?” You answered, still pretending that you were too busy to move your head from its position.

“Skyguy hasn’t met you. Here, Anakin, y/n. She helps us out here in the library.”

“Ahsoka, we’re not supposed to be having social meetings, we need to go-” You finally gazed up and in that moment, Anakin and you made eye contact for the first time; it was intense. It felt like something clicked for him. “You must be Y/n.” Anakin shook his head lightly, hinting a little smirk as leaned over your table with fixed eyes. 

Hell, no.

“Yes, I am. How may I help you?” You were bitter, totally unbothered by his chiseled cheekbones, or his gorgeous hair, or his plumped lips. Not even the scar had any effect whatsoever. He was an ass and that was automatically a turn off for you. 

“I’m sorry I haven’t met you. You must be new.” He explained with dreamy eyes, subtly checking you out. You cursed the moment you decided to come in today with a blouse who had a bit of a cleavage. “I’m Anakin. Anakin Skywalker.”

“Actually, I’ve been here for almost two months now.” You suppressed the soul-eating need to roll your eyes.

“Oh, really? Sorry, I don’t come here much.” He leaned over even more, trying to keep eye contact even when you sat down. 

“Obviously.” You whispered on the low.

“Excuse me?” Anakin frowned, interrupting his beam to pout with confusion.

“Nothing.” You smiled widely with a fake grin. 

“Okay…” His frown deepened before a smirk broke out his lips. “Maybe I will make it a habit and visit more often.” He shrugged his shoulders, tilting his head to the side, deciphering the effects of his statement on you. 

“You should.” You looked at him and gave him a side-smile, making his eyes sparkle. “Books are good for you.” You returned to check the order of nabooian books on your computer. 

“Yeah, books are cool but there are other things I would much rather check out.” He smirked shamelessly at you, the back-handed comment flying way over his head.

You felt like gagging. Not the good kind.

Before you could come up with a clever response and shut him down for good, Ahsoka spoke from behind him.

“Ugh, gross! Let’s go!” The kid dragged him out by his clothes and before he disappeared through the glass door, he winked at you.

That was the first time you have seen him. First of many, many more. 

Since the day your paths crossed, he took every fleeting moment to come and “read”, when in reality it was just him eating, or drawing or doing anything but opening a book. Taking advantage of your breaks, or whenever you returned to your seat after doing rounds, he would come over and make conversation. About his battles, his accomplishments, his close-calls to death… or about random facts he collected from his missions and travels; Anything that would maybe impress you.

And when he wasn’t doing that? He would drown you in compliments, to see if in fact, you soften up to him. Anakin was already aware of your no-so-secret disgust towards him the day he caught one of your eye rolls.

Did he care? No. 

He was persistent: admiring your hair, loving the way you had styled it in a little bun (even though it was because the heat was eating you alive). He would ask about the tasks you were performing, sucking at pretending to be interested in hearing about organizing books in alphabetical order. 

And it would have maybe worked; his good looks combined to his natural charisma were enough to make any mortal melt at his sight. You almost combust when you saw him carrying some wood boards into the library, the primal part of you rejoicing at the sight of his strong muscles stretching. The man was eye candy, whether you like it or not.

But, boy, were you tough.

Anakin Skywalker was not your cup of tea to say the least. You wouldn’t collaborate in his attempts to get to know you. You were so uninterested in finding out more about him when you had already scanned him. Just a way-too-handsome-for-his-own-good guy who was lucky enough to be born as the Chosen One, because otherwise, he would have never made it in the Order. He was determined, you would give him that. 

His approaches were never creepy or invasive enough to make you uncomfortable, only to drive you wild. Even when he was the worst part of your day, you had to keep the polite but distant charade going on, in order to protect your job. Your disgust towards him, instead of hurting him, amused him. He liked challenges and you were freaking Mission Impossible. Although he also saw the flaws in you: a pretentious prick girl who had probably achieved everything in her life thanks to nepotism. But he could see past that.

Because, boy, were you hot. 

And he was sure you liked it nasty. 

Underneath your goodie-two-shoes clothes hid the true you: he knew you loved being treated like a filthy slut.

“Hello, y/n!” Ahsoka squealed in an excited voice. You two have grown to adore each other. 

“Hey, Soka!” You responded happily, finishing to put some encyclopedias on a shelf. When you turned around, you saw she wasn’t alone. “Oh… good afternoon, Anakin.”

“Nice to see you too, y/n.” Anakin huffed in a sarcastic voice before strolling to where you were, Ahsoka following close behind. “Is that a new shirt? It suits you.”

“No, it’s the same white button up shirt that I’ve always used.” You smiled and turned around to roll your eyes in peace. He was too busy devouring your bosom behind the fabric to ever notice the barrier between his eyes and your skin.

“Y/n, do you think you could grab me a book about loreeks? I’m doing a little presentation about them for my science class.” Ahsoka asked you with a sweet voice.

“Oh sure… just let me look oveeeer…” You walked, stretching the words as you searched in the countless sections. “...here. It must be on one of these shelves.” You announced when you entered the exotic animals aisle. 

Digitating the code on your scanner you found out it was in one of the tallest shelves, only reachable with a ladder. Right when you were about to move it, Anakin came in.

“Don’t worry, Y/n. I’ll get it.” And he used the Force to bring the book down. “Here you go Snips, study hard.” He nudged her head, annoying her.

“Yeah, I guess… but it’s Friday. Can I read after I hang out with the other padawans? Barris and Meelo are going skating!” She gave her best puppy eyes, to which Anakin agreed, after giving it little to no thought.

“You didn’t have to give her the book, I could have done it.” You waited for Ahsoka to leave before dropping the bomb. 

“Easy there, kitten. I was just helping out.” He furrowed his eyebrows. As if the unnecessary nickname wasn’t enough to drive you mad. Looking down, he saw the rest of your outfit and lingered his eyes more than necessary in your short, black skirt. “On second thought, I might have let you do it.” He smirked confidently.

“Just stay out of my way, okay?” You growled, walking away from him to your desk, not without bumping your shoulder with his on your way out.

“What the hell is your problem?” He asked with an incredulous face.

You were done. The build-up from the past month was beginning to choke down your sense of decency. Not to mention that your day was already going terrible before he appeared: the droid that would always help you out was broken, significantly delaying your work day. Also, it was laundry day and you had to use your uncomfortable lingerie.

“You know what, Skywalker?” You turned around with raised eyebrows. “You’re my problem.” He opened his eyes in bewilderment. “I don’t like you. I don’t appreciate you coming in, all macho-” You made a mocking manner. “-acting like a goddamn superhero, only after cleaning up the mess you created in the first place.” You crossed your arms in your chest. 

“I’m a general, kitten, and I can assure you the war it’s not my fault.” He scoffed, he used the nickname again, knowing it would press your buttons. 

“And how many times have you messed it up bigger than it was?” You squinted your eyes, only to see him run out of words. “That’s what I thought.” You came back to digitating codes. “It’s like you don’t think. You are just a machine run by adrenaline and praise.” You finally rolled your eyes in front of him without shame. You tried to run down the reports that C7, your assistant droid would do, only to fail and almost delete everything in your computer. “And I can assure you I have bigger problems than dealing with you!”

“Okay, back down-”

“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” You yelled, getting desperate and throwing a tantrum at the device. You had enough for the day. You could leave, given that no one would come over this late, but your sense of responsibility prevented you from going home before finishing your work load. “I fucking hate this system!”

“Let me see-”

“Don’t! Just don’t, okay?” You swatted his hand away. “I’m not in the mood.”

“Could you stop being so stuck-up and let me help you?” He raised his voice, stepping up close to tower you. His eyes were on fire and you could sense that your previous comments did get to him, but for some reason outside of your understanding, he was still willing to help.

“Fine.” You chewed the words in your mouth, stepping down as you glared at him, giving him space to analyze the situation.

Instead of leaning down the computer, he went directly to C7, who lingered weakly on the side of your desk. He picked him up and put it on the table, moving him around his hands to examine the droid. He hummed after a couple of minutes, putting the mechanical body at eye level. “I see.”

“See what? What is it?” You pressed, trying to pick a glance from over his shoulder.

“I’m going to need my tools.” He murmured, dropping the droid back again.

“Wh-”

“I’ll be right back.” He exclaimed, before heading to the door in a rush.

“Wait! What?” You shouted, the shadow of his body the only thing visible.

You stayed alone for about fifteen minutes. You even got to thinking that he was pulling a prank on you, after yelling at him. But you stayed there, because well… what else would you do? You were beginning to fall asleep as you played with paper clips, when you heard the door being opened again.

“Finally! I thought you had left!” You sighed in relief, pushing your body off your desk. 

“I was getting my tools, I told you.” He frowned, lifting the heavy, dark red box to the white marble. “Now let’s bring this one back to life.” He smiled, before busting the carcass open. 

It took Anakin less than what you waited for him to get C7 up and running again. He flipped panels, snapped cables and pressed buttons, at an order that seemed random to you, until C7’s mechanical eyes opened again.

“Oh my God!” You laughed in disbelief. “He’s functioning again!”

Anakin smiled down at the table, as he finished up adjusting some screws. C7 sat up, analyzing his surroundings before getting up and going straight back to work. 

“I-I-” You were speechless. How did he do that? So fast? “I can’t believe you just did that.” You mumbled, still looking at C7 like it was a ghost. “Thank you, Anakin.” You turned around with apologizing eyes, twitching an embarrassed smile. 

“No problem. His transmitter was disconnected from the main system. I had to fix his-” The next couple of things that he mentioned sounded like pure gibberish to you, but he was very firm, so it must be true. Right? Sensing your bafflement, he spilled facts slower and quieter until he stopped talking, finalizing with a dry smile. “Yeah, it was nothing.”

He was starting to pack everything in his toolbox again and you had a pending need to say something. However, you didn’t know if you should kick off with a real apology or-

“How did you know all that?” So a pop quiz it was. In your defense, you were genuinely curious about the abilities he had just demonstrated. Mindblown, to be more specific. 

“About what?” He furrowed his brows, closing the box but leaving on the table. 

“About the transmitter, and the restraining bolt, and- and-” You were running out of technical terms. 

“Mechanics are second nature to me at this point.” He shrugged his shoulders, picking up the box. “I know everything about the topic, so, it was an easy fix. I’d have rearranged his central system if I had the missing part, but it’s very specific. What I did will do for now, though.” 

He was about to leave when he noticed the way you were leaning on the table, head on top of your fist to pay close attention to him. You were murmuring almost unhearable “uh-huh”s, totally lost in his words. 

“Sooo, you know mechanics.” You were such a hypocrite, you couldn’t stand the man fifteen minutes ago and now you were drooling over the sight of him explaining complicated shit to you. Snob. “You often fix things?” You tried to investigate, see if the throbbing happening between your legs was worth pursuing. 

“Sometimes… I often go to the hangar and repair the damaged ships or flip them.” He grinned without teeth. “The techs often ask for me. They say I have an eye for these things. Been working on droids since I was a kid, so.” Anakin wasn’t trying to brag, but his ample knowledge in mechanics was something that he prided himself on. 

“That seems like a lot of work.” You continued the small talk, slowly losing yourself over this spontaneous crush. 

“It can get tricky.” He dismissed, beginning to notice the glint on your eyes. He recognized the way your irises had darkened: He got those fuck-me eyes wherever he went. “Still haven’t found something I can’t fix.”

But it was involuntary. The fact that he was an expert on a matter as hard as mechanics scratched a part of your brain; It flipped a switch inside of you. Anakin was a different man under your eyes now. He was smart, hella smart. 

“Gosh, that’s so impressive.” You giggled like the girls that would flirt at him. Pathetic. But you quickly regained control, not before sucking up some courage and getting closer to him, posing more seductively this time. “That brain of yours sure hides lots of secrets.”

He hadn’t quite figured out why the change of heart, so it took him a moment to replay your evening together. It lasted a bit more than he liked to admit, but it hit him. Of course. An arrogant smile cracked his face. Of course you would be attracted to someone who was a master of something you consider relevant. After all, you liked to consider yourself an “intellectual”. Just to test his theory, he consciously started to brag about something else… something that would have your panties in a bunch if his hypothesis was correct.

“Wanna know another one?” He cocked an eyebrow, resting his elbow on the table to stand inches away from your face.

Your face shined with a slight pink blush, but it was the way you bit your lip that drove him crazy. That and your enthusiastic nod. “Yeah.”

“There’s a reason behind why I’m the best pilot of the fleet. And it’s not just because of my background as a pod racer or the Force.” He whispered, snickering at how soft your eyes had grown. “It’s actually because… I use physics.”

“Physics?” You almost moaned. 

“Yeah, physics.” He repeated, moistening his lips, a thing your eyes followed. “Self-taught, just like with mechanics.”

That ripped a subtle whimper out of you. Well, not subtle to him. 

“You-you understand math?” If it wasn’t because you were visibly squeezing your thighs at the newly acquired information, he would be completely offended that you thought he was dumb as fuck. 

“Love em.” He muttered, his intense stare glued to you, as his fingers put a string of hair behind your ear.

Like thunder, you were rushing to capture his lips and show him just how hot you thought he was now. Anakin freezed at first, taking aback by your sudden demonstration of affection, but when he understood that you were willingly -and enthusiastically- giving yourself to him, he wasted no time to embrace you back. 

Wet kisses splashed everywhere; it was fucking mess. You hung onto his shoulders while he groped all of your body, starting with your sweet hips, fondling your ass like it was his personal stress ball and finally landing on your waist. You pressed against him shamelessly, but in reality, how much shame could you still have when the man’s tongue was down your throat? The only thing you knew with certainty was that the sucking sounds and moans you both dropped were intensifying the already sex-filled atmosphere.

“Anakin.” You tried to sound normal, but your voice was failing just like your knees were. “W-why haven’t you gone to a proper school? Maybe get a degree?”

Was that seriously so important to you? The opinion of others? Anakin questioned in his own head.

Anakin was the kind of person that wasn’t susceptible to the opinion of others, especially regarding his own image. He was sure of the shit he knew and didn’t need anyone validating that for him. No expensive universities, no uptight professors; Obi-Wan was more than enough. Nonetheless, he had found a shortcut to get inside your pants and God as his witness, he was gonna use it. 

“Y/n.” He snickered right in your face, drinking in the power. “I don’t care about any of that. I'm a certified engineer, that’s how I got to build this myself.” Removing the leather, he revealed his mechanical limb to you, wiggling his fingers.

It was fancier than you ever thought a mechanical hand could be. Black with touches of gold; it was elegant and sophisticated, way more advanced than any technology you had ever seen in the orthopedics research field. And you knew it well, your mom was an orthopedic surgeon. 

It was no surprise to him that after spilling that last fact you were now shamelessly grinding on his half-hard. The fact that he was an engineering mastermind was such an aphrodisiac. And as much as he wanted to have another taste of your full, pink lips, the ones he often imagined enveloped around his dick while you scolded him, Anakin wasn’t willing to make the first move.

You were going to have to beg for it. 

“Anakin?” Your hands flattened on his pecs, back arching when he cupped your cheek with the cool durasteel prosthetic, kneading against it with soft eyes. He must have noticed how captivated you were by his invention. 

“Yeah, baby?” He continued the soft ministrations up and down your cheek, redirecting your gaze to his face whenever your eyes would deviate to his artificial limb. 

“You- Uhm, you built it from scratch?” You gulped when his thumb inched closer to your mouth, rubbing your bottom lip and pulling it open. 

Little obedient you put no resistance, and instead, stuck out your wet tongue to happily receive his digit into your warmness. But this time it was his index, the one you were bobbing your head into, eye contact not faltering even when you were practically giving oral to his hand. Anakin smiled pleased at your enthusiasm for pleasuring him and added another finger for you to lubricate. 

“From scratch.” He nodded, lustful irises boring into you. “Designed it too.”

You moaned around him, feeling content with being sandwiched between his firm torso and your desk, and with your mouth being fucked by his fingers. Saliva smeared all over your chin, you whined pitifully when your lips were no longer stuffed. On the contrary of leaving you all hot and bothered, Anakin lowered those same fingers to your leaky cunt, pushing your underwear aside for easy access. 

He groaned when he first inserted a finger, your gasping a sign for him to slow down. “Baby, you’re tight.” He seemed to love that about you. 

After adjusting to the size of his strong index finger, Anakin breached in with his middle one, repeating the process of you getting used to the coldness and girth all over. 

“A-Anakin.” You closed your eyes, involuntarily standing on your tippy toes. 

“That’s right, you’re doing so well. Taking my fingers like a true champ.” He bit down a condescending smile. “Atta girl.”

The initial discomfort was just a milestone you had to overcome to succumb to the pleasure that it was being fucked by Anakin Skywalker’s metal hand. His frigid thumb came to roll over your bundle of nerves, helping you relax into him and enjoy the sensation of fully riding his hand. 

“That’s it. Fuck my hand just like that, kitten.” He chuckled, finding a spot on your neck to latch on, leave a little souvenir of your encounter, and hide his pitiful laugh. 

Kisses were peppered along your exposed throat, your clavicle and jaw, his long eyelashes tickling you and making you clench around his metal hand tighter. Whilst you worried about not whining too loud for anyone to enter the library, Anakin was pumping his fingers at such an unholy pace to complicate your task.

“Shhh, baby. You need to be quiet. Wouldn’t like for anyone to come in. You could lose your job.” He mocked with a side smile and you had to gripped his bicep to keep your balance. “Could you imagine? Getting caught having sex at work? With a Jedi?”

You could perceive that the trespassing of the pseudo-celibacy Jedi code was turning him to no end, the mischievous glimmer in his eyes getting stronger when he said the last sentence. 

“W-We’re not having sex.” You corrected him, like it mattered. Like having him knuckles deep into you was somehow less frowned-upon than to have actual coitus.

That made him laugh and you wiggled underneath him, fighting to not let your tears fall. 

“You just wait.” His lips ghosted over yours, his breath fanning over your heated face. The increase of the movements of his hand was a sign that he had noticed the contractions around his digits, fully aware that you were close. “Ready to come, baby? Gonna gush all over me?”

You nodded, biting your swollen lip, losing the battle against your tear duct. Anakin used his other thumb, the one that was not torturing your clit, to liberate your abused lip. His mouth lowered to capture yours in a hot kiss, this tongue sliding on your inside until it hit your throat. So deep into you that you would never forget his taste; so deep you will never be able to deny him. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You whimpered against his smile when you reached your peak, dissolving into this meaningless mass between his arms. “Anakin…” You rode out your climax, still rocking your hips to prolong the pleasure.

Anakin waited until you regained some composure to help you fix your clothes, putting back your underwear as he found it and lowering your skirt. His actions had you frowning: Weren’t you two gonna fuck? You were already mentally prepared to welcome his enormous cock in your tiny canal. 

He grinned at your puppy eyes and adorable pout, your flustered state funnier than it should be. It was almost enough to break him. But someone had to give you a lesson. 

 “At the end of the day, I’m just a soldier, Y/n. An incompetent one, according to you.” 

Before you could protest that, he was tilting his head in an accusatory manner. Like saying: Don’t even try it. And before leaving with his head high, he spat: 

“My apologies if that’s not fancy enough for you, ma’am.”

[draconic-desire]

THE NAIVE DARLINGGGG

I can imagine darling crying into Sunday.. at first refusing going to home, expressing her insecurities. So when Sunday drags her back, she just pleads with Sunday. All darling wants to to serve at least some purpose to Sundays life. She begs Sunday to let her cook for him .. or in her sobbing fit shr muttered how even having Sundays baby would serve some usefullness.. Darling didnt want to seem like a burden to Sunday..

At the mention of babies, Sunday gets the idea of how sweet little children will tie darling to him forever

The baby will come out a lil skrunkly , in a cite way of course <3 a fat plump baby who looks like a dumpling with chicken wings attached to the back of its ear :"(

sunday would 1000% babytrap his darling at some point, you cannot convince me otherwise. but if YOU came to HIM about it? girl bye you’re done for

Yan!Sunday x Fem!Reader

warning: nsfw thoughts from sunday, mentions of pregnancy

After Sunday leads you back home, it doesn’t take long for your thoughts to spiral again.

Walking through the halls of the spacious pavilion, eying the grandeur that is Sunday’s home, pondering his status as the head of the Family…you start to wonder what you bring to the table.

He claims he loves you, that you are unique and irreplaceable, but what does that really mean? You have no money, wealth, or fame, no notable skills that could contribute to the Oak Family lineage.

Well, except…

Your hand falls to your abdomen. It’s something Sunday has mentioned in passing, the need for an heir, the desire to expand his family, but you never thought he meant doing so with you. But perhaps…?

Your head shakes violently, and you turn to wipe away a stray tear. How foolish of you. Sunday doesn’t keep you around for that sort of thing. His hier will be delivered from a queen, befitting of the same status as him, and not some nobody like you.

Like always, Sunday is more attentive than you give him credit for.

He thinks it’s cute, how naive and oblivious you are sometimes. Except when he notices that this time, you are attempting to hide your crying behind the palm on your hand.

“(Y/n), my love, what troubles you?” He gently pulls your hand away from your face and instead turns you to face him.

Seeing him like this, his tender gaze trained on your form alone, suddenly makes you burst into tears.

“S-S-Sunday,” you sob, “please let me help! I’ll do anything!”

He blinks, confusion written across his features. “Help? With what? (Y/n), it’s been a long day, let me take you to bed—”

You clasp his hands in your own, looking up at him with (e/c) eyes brimming with tears. “Please, don’t throw me aside for someone else. I-I promise I’m not a burden. You need an heir, right? So please, let me carry that responsibility.”

He inhales sharply, his amethyst pupils dilating.

…Did he hear you correctly?

You want to have his child?

Sunday momentarily forgets how to breathe.

Oh, how he has fantasized about this very scenario; it has taken all of his willpower to hold back, to fool you into believing his charming, domestic mannerisms, when he truly wishes to claim every part of you, to brand himself upon every inch of your flesh. Lovely, beautiful, naive little you would never expect the dark desires hidden beneath the surface.

In reality, the thought of you begging for his seed permeates his waking and sleeping dreams. He’s lost track of the amount of nights spent with his hand around his cock, picturing your tight cunt wrapped around it instead.

Never would he have imagined you in this position willingly, practically on your knees for him, desperate for his cum, for his child growing in your belly. The idea arouses him more than you can ever know, and he has to shift to hide his growing erection.

Instead, he scoops you into his arms and nuzzles his nose in your hair, inhaling your scent. Oh, how lovely you’re going to smell when you’re glowing and round with his heir! He imagines how adorable his Halovian child will be, and how he wishes to pin a pair of wings behind your ears as well—a matching set for father, mother, and child.

The wings are, of course, the very ones ripped from your own back—you’re just too entranced by Sunday to notice it was he who plucked them from you to begin with.

And now, Sunday is through with holding back. You’re going to be fully and irrevocably his, tied to him forever. Like a fly landing on a venus trap, your own actions seal your fate. You don’t have a moment to react before the jaws of the predator swallow you whole.

“How could I deny you, my angel?” he coos, pacing towards the bedroom as he begins to pry at the buttons of your top. “And what better time to begin than the present, hm?”

[candycandy00]

Office Life (Shigaraki x Reader)

Just Shigaraki awkwardly fantasizing about the cute receptionist who works in the same office building as him. You guys let me know if you like this quick “imagine” format for when I don’t have a full fanfic idea.

Smut. 18+. Violence/Blood (not Reader’s). Gender neutral Reader. Dubcon.

Shigaraki, who never had much interest in sex before, when he was so busy with the League and the war. Sure he jacked off to hentai every now and then, but the thought of having real life sex with a real live person didn’t really enter his brain. 

Until now. 

Shigaraki, who is fresh out of prison and working a dumb office job as part of his “rehabilitation”. Who is ignored and avoided by most of his coworkers because of his very publicized past. 

Shigaraki, who just can’t understand why you’re nice to him, why you smile at him so sweetly, like he’s an actual human being and not a monster. Why you, the cute receptionist from down the hall, keeps coming into the office he works in with five other men, desks all lined up neatly. 

Shigaraki, who likes that you look at him and acknowledge him, but sometimes has the irrational urge to show you how terrifying and monstrous he can be, to make you fear him the way everyone else does.

Shigaraki, who sometimes has violent fantasies about you that he will never act upon. Like today when you come into the room to share cookies you baked and brought in to the office. You, having such an obvious crush on him that even a socially inept weirdo like him can tell, blush and smile shyly when he takes a cookie from the box you hold out to him. 

Shigaraki, who has no idea what you could possibly like about him, but feels a little smug that the rest of the guys in the office are clearly jealous. 

And as you move toward the back of the room handing out cookies, constantly glancing back to see if he’s eating his, as if wanting his approval, Shigaraki’s dark fantasy takes over again. 

He imagines standing up from his chair and moving through the room, decaying each man in turn, most of them still holding their dumb fucking cookies, only to reach the back, where you’re cowering in a corner, trembling with fear as blood pools around your feet. 

You turn around to look at him, terror in those big wet eyes of yours, and then the pleading starts. He imagines you begging him not to kill you, babbling promises to not tell anyone, confessing your love in some desperate attempt to win his favor. You’re still clutching your frilly pink box of homemade cookies in your shaking hands. 

In his fantasy, he has perfect control over his quirk at all times, and with no effort at all he can decay the clothes right off your body, leaving you naked and vulnerable in the room full of bloody chunks. And you drop the cookies in your shock, trying to cover yourself with your hands. 

He won’t allow that. He’s wondered what you look like under your clothes for too long. And so he roughly pulls your hands away, getting an eye full, before shoving your back onto the nearest desk, spreading you open and unbuckling his pants. 

In this fantasy, you always struggle at first. But after he starts fucking you hard, you begin moaning his name, wrapping your arms around him, looking up at him with teary eyes and blushing cheeks as he rails you. 

Shigaraki, who snaps back to reality when you walk by him, the scent of your floral perfume drawing his attention. You look at the uneaten cookie in his hand and a flash of sadness crosses your face. He hurries to take a bite, and tries to give you a smile that isn’t creepy. 

You smile back, and he knows for a fact he will never, ever act on his worst impulses with you. Because far more than his desire to show you how much of a villain he can be, he wants you to keep smiling at him. 

And someday, maybe he’ll stop being a fucking coward and ask you to go to a movie with him. 

[thatfreshi]

Could I request an Astarion/GN!reader(Tav) where reader has trauma around their throat being touched and stuff but bears through the panic attacks just so Astarion can feed and Astarion only finds out after they make camp and confronts reader/Tav about their mental breakdown after a battle they had prior in the day?(reader got grabbed forcefully by the neck?) Essentially a bit of angst and comfort?

Set in act 2!!

TW - choking, panic attack, disordered eating behaviors

Recommended Song: Don't Invest In Me - Adam Melchor

Battle is horrifying, something Astarion never truly quite realized until he fell in love you with. He's talented, especially at killing people. He's never had to worry in a fight, because it was always just him. Now he has to worry about you, and it's painful, not being able to be by your side constantly, watching you in perilous situations, looking death right in the eye. When your group ran into a few violent adventurers yesterday, you weren't expecting any trouble. Suddenly, metal clashing, magic moving through the trees. Astarion moved quickly, offing one of the offenders almost immediately. When he turned to see who was next, bloodlust in his eyes, he saw you being held by the throat. You were frozen, running out of oxygen, tears welling at your eyes. He ran through the trees, running his blade through your captor's back.

"Tav? My dear, are you alright?"

You can't speak, utterly shocked. No one had ever tried to choke you in the throes of battle, and it reminded you of awful things, things that were better left unsaid. He checks you for any other wounds as you're trapped in your own mind. The fighting continues, but he doesn't care. All that matters is you, the others can handle themselves just fine. And if not, that's their loss, not his.

After thoroughly checking you over, he can't find anything else of concern. The bruising on your neck though, it's black and blue already. Racing thoughts, wondering if there's been any lasting damage. He can't decide if he should be more concerned about the fact that you're practically frozen in place or if your windpipe is destroyed.

"The fuck are you doing? We have shit to deal with!"

Karlach silences her complaints when she sees you lying on the ground. Astarion doesn't even look up at her, afraid. He's only ever truly had one thing, one thing that was his, and that's you. Everything else feels so impermanent, but you? You're constant.

"Astarion! Astarion!"

She yells out his name until he finally snaps back to look at your tiefling friend.

"Take Tav back to camp, we've got it covered."

Karlach then runs off, back to assist Wyll with a shadow-covered half-elf. You groan in pain, your neck on fire. As you start to come back to reality, you realize you're in the vampire's arms, a vampire currently moving through the dark as quickly as possible. Neither of you have lights on you, but he knows there are still torches lit at camp, he just has to get there before the shadow curse starts to take hold. You're light-headed, both from lack of oxygen and the panic attack.

"Where...?"

"Hush darling, it's alright. We're almost there, almost to camp."

Through a couple more feet of trees, the two of you make it, bathing in the warm light of the torches posted behind the brush. He takes you back to your tent, where your bedrolls lie side by side. He silently curses himself for not knowing any healing magic, promising himself he'll finally learn after this.

"Aster?"

You call out groggily.

"Yes my love, I'm right here."

Ceasing the nervous pacing, he sits by your side.

"What... what happened?"

He almost doesn't want to say, worried about how you reacted while it was happening.

"One of the shadow-cursed, they... they had you in a nasty chokehold, and I killed them."

You shift, wishing he didn't have to know about all of this.

"Sorry."

"About what darling? You've done nothing wrong."

"About not telling you- not telling you about it."

You're gasping to get your words out, your throat clearly damaged. He furrows his brow in concerned confusion.

"I- I really don't like people touching my neck, doing anything to it to be honest. Wasn't expecting one of them to grab me like that."

Coughing at the end of your sentence, you don't see Astarion's eyes travel through his thoughts, realizing what that means.

"Darling... you let me feed off of you almost every evening."

You smile a little.

"I know."

He grabs one of your hands, clasping it in both of his.

"I'll never do it again. I'm so sorry, I had no idea."

Frantic, worried he's done something irreversibly wrong.

"No, no Aster it's okay. Does it suck sometimes? Yeah, but I need you to be healthy. Besides, what's a better way to work through your trauma than exposure therapy?"

"That's not fair. I can find something else, some other way."

"And what, go back to forest animals? You know there's nothing for you out here, in the darkness."

"Then I'll simply starve! Done it before, I'll do it again."

Gods, he's stubborn. You don't blame him, he would never want to cross anyone's boundaries after his have been trampled a million times.

"My love, come here."

You reach out, beckoning to pull him down beside you.

"If I didn't want to do it, I wouldn't. You need to feed, and I can provide that. You do plenty for me, let me do this one thing for you."

"But, but you hate it."

"Yeah. Those two things can coexist, my hate for people touching my neck, and my love for you. I can put up with the anxiety if it means you're okay."

"I would be okay though."

You cup his face in your hand, making sure he's looking at you.

"I'm telling you I'm okay, and that you deserve more than rats. Okay?"

You've been around him long enough, you know his logic. If he survived for two hundred years living off of flies and rats, he certainly doesn't need blood like yours. If he had starved for an entire year, he could take a few months before getting to Baldur's Gate. Sometimes you have to remind him that survival mode isn't living, that he's allowed to have nice things. Tears fall from his eyes.

"Are you sure my sweet? Absolutely certain?"

"Of course, and if I ever needed you to stop I would tell you, promise."

You put your pinky out, and he stares at it.

"What... what are you doing? Is this you offering me to feed off a singular finger? Because if so, that's uh-"

"No, gods! It's a pinky promise."

"A... a what?"

You start laughing, so hard that you start coughing again, tears falling down your face.

"You've never heard of a pinky promise?"

It pulls at your heart a little, realizing he probably never had anyone teach him.

"I guess I haven't."

You put your pinky out, and he does the same, and then you hook yours, interlacing the small finger with his.

"There, I pinky promise that I'll tell you if you need to stop feeding on me."

As you pull your hand away, he looks confused.

"And that's what, some non-verbal contract?"

"I guess so Mr. Magistrate."

You start laughing again.

"Okay, you have thoroughly scared me, and made me cry, and teased me, in one night! I'm not sure how much more I can take."

There's a hint of humor in his tone. Honestly, he also thinks it's ridiculous that he was a magistrate, considering he was terrible at it, at least from the small things he remembers.

"Well, it's over now. I'm okay, and we're safe."

He narrows his eyes.

"I'm still going to have Shadowheart look over you when the rest return."

"Well, that's your fault for not learning healing magic."

"Okay, you don't know any magic, so I don't want to hear it!"

The two of you stay up for hours, laughing at stupid jokes, hysterical from the tragedy that evening. Sometimes after something horrible, you just need a good laugh, especially with your easily provoked lover.

[emberuby]

in your arms forever — chapter two. | p.js

chapter one | series masterlist | chapter three.

pairing: park jongseong x fem reader

chapter summary: you fully accepted your love for jay, and you two lived in quiet bliss in the background of your family drama. your love did not falter even when your dear sister came to visit you and tell you what a danger you put yourself in by falling for him. little did karina know, the danger never lied with jay but instead with his corrupt staff. a horrible and dangerous revelation will make jay question your entire relationship.

warnings: somnophilia, oral (m and f receiving), unprotected sex, creampie, mentions of semi-public sex, vaginal sex, jay is insanely horny all the time, heavy breeding kink, dark content, brief depiction of sexual harassment, heavy angst, betrayal, some fluff in the beginning, toxic and possessive jay, violent content, blood, murder, blood covered sex, hard dom! jay, sub! reader, mentions of body weight.

taglist: @nshmrarki, @strxwbloody, @anittamaxwynnn, @heeheeyeoiizz01, @star4rin, @yohanabanana, @lilyuwon, @delvziion, @tinyteezer, @partiallyderived, @liebe-love, @honeybunnee, @tmtxtf

note: yes the title of this fic is based on a shower sex scene, what about it? anyway, i'm glad i was finally able to get this done. i will be taking a break until the third and last chapter to write a few wips i wanted to work on, but the third chapter and epilogue is already mostly mapped out. ~ feedback is greatly encouraged and always feel free to ask questions ^^

wc: 14k

That night, you slept peacefully and dreamt of your future with Jay. While in reality, your future was nowhere near as certain, in your fantasy world, the two of you moved into a smaller estate outside the city, where it was quiet, natural and felt like home. 

You were looking out the window, and you saw two children running around in the yard playing tag. The taller one was a girl, who looked so much like Jay, and the shorter one, who looked like he had just barely begun walking, still resembled his father more than he did you. You found that amusing, just how strong Jay’s genes were that your children looked barely like you. You wouldn’t mind it though, considering you thought of him as one of the most beautiful creatures to ever grace your life. 

Just like that, your fantasy began to shift. You were transported to the dining table, a glass of pink champagne in your hand, but just as you were about to take a sip, your husband grabbed it out of your grasp and spilt the contents of it into the sink. His eyes darkened and he furrowed his brows. He threw the glass onto the ground and you heard the sound of it shattering erupt on the wooden floors. 

You winced as you felt a shard of glass slice you on the shoulder and you began bleeding out. Doubling over, you grasped your shoulder, letting out a sob of pain. Jay immediately bent down and cradled your head. “I’m so sorry, my love. Fuck. I’m so fucking sorry. Please, please let me make it okay. Please forgive me.” He was sobbing now, holding onto you so tightly you began to feel dizzy.

Your fantasy faded away as you slowly regained consciousness. At first, you were highly confused about what the wet feeling was on your inner thighs. You felt soft but strong hands gripping your flesh, spreading your legs open. The figure started gently lapping at your clit with his clit and it felt like bliss all over again. Your mouth flew open before your eyes could, and you gasped as you felt the pre-orgasm tingles running up your spine. 

Your pussy was sensitive from last night, so when your eyes fluttered open to see Jay leaning over your cunt and eyes boring into you, you whined pathetically, “B-Baby…Please, I-I’m really…really sensitive.”

Jay halted his movements but didn’t stand up, instead smirking at you and peppering a few kisses onto your inner thighs, “I know I should probably pace myself, but you’re so irresistible. I couldn’t help it, after I got a taste of your pussy last night it’s all I’ve been thinking of.”

Your face heated up at his crude words, and you put your palms over your face to hide your embarrassment, “Don’t say things like that, Jay.”

Jay chuckled and released one of his hands from your hips and intertwined his fingers with yours, “No need to be shy. I’m just being honest, and communication is everything in a marriage, right?”

A marriage. So that’s what you two are now. You were a real couple. It only made sense. You loved each other and you were wearing his ring. I mean, for fuck’s sake, he almost got you pregnant last night, so it didn’t make sense for you to deny it any longer. You were Park Jongseong’s wife now. 

“Yes, you are,” you heard Jay whisper. Your eyebrows raised in surprise, and he grinned at your adorable reaction, “I guess you didn’t mean to speak your thoughts out loud.” 

You shook your head, “I’m just trying to process all of this. It’s a lot.”

Jay hummed in response, rubbing his thumb over your hand. You felt comfortable just being like that until Jay abruptly tightened his grip on your thigh and plunged his tongue back into your sopping wet cunt. Your mouth flew open again and you arched your back off the mattress, your head becoming light and dizzy. Your whole body ached, especially your cunt

Mixed in with your moans of pleasure were sobs from how overwhelmed you were, “Baby…Jay, please…p-please slow down,” your hand reached down to grip at his hair, hoping to maybe control his movements. That didn’t work though, as Jay interpreted it as a sign to go even deeper. He inserted two fingers into your sopping hole and continued licking your clit, incredibly precise with his movements.  

The pleasure was getting to your head and you began fluttering your eyes closed. You felt a harsh sting to your left thigh as Jay spanked it, and you screeched.

“No, open your eyes,” he warned. He went deeper into your pussy with his fingers, and you became flustered at the wet noises your cunt was making every time he’d entered you.

You refused, closing your eyes even tighter, feeling your eyes well up with tears, “I-It’s t-too…,” you paused to breathe, “It’s too much!” You yelped when he curled his fingers inside you, hitting your sensitive spot.

You felt another harsh slap on your thigh, making you wince. He said in a threatening tone, “Open your eyes and watch yourself cum in my mouth. I’m not asking.”

You weakly opened your eyes and were allured by how dark and mesmerising his expression was. While you were struggling to compose yourself, Jay looked as if he was just doing his job, and he was a professional at it. It made you fantasise about what it would be like to suck his cock, and if he’d be so dishevelled as you were right now.

The feeling of his tongue and fingers inside you was becoming mind-breaking and you felt like you were going to ascend. 

Jay enjoyed the knowledge of his effect on your body. To be fair, you were incredibly sore from yesterday, your body adorned with purple love bites he left on you and your voice hoarse from the noises of pleasure. You were bound to be more reactive because of your exhaustion. With that being said, he loved how little effort it took him for you to be lying beneath him like this, withering like a leaf, glistening with sweat and glowing from the inside out. 

You felt the pressure begin to rise in your tummy, knowing that at any moment you would fall over the edge. 

“You’re so gorgeous,” Jay beamed.

“Baby, I’m go-going to…c-cum,” you cried out, much to Jay’s approval. He didn’t say anything, instead quickening the pace of his fingers and tongue. You could only see the top of his head now, as he was bent over and eating you out as a man stared. 

You saw specks of white as your climax washed over you, and your hands were clawing at the pillows lying underneath your head. The fat teardrops were streaming down your face and your jaw became unhinged as you cried out, “Fuck, Jay! B-Baby…Please d-don’t stop.”

He fingered you through your orgasm, helping you come down from it by gradually lowering his pace, “You’re so beautiful when you cum. I should keep you in my bed forever,” he was facing you now and his mouth was glistening with your arousal.  

Your chest rose and fell as you struggled to catch your breath, “We should be more productive in the mornings, Jay."

“How was that not productive? I mean, we have an heir to make,” his eyebrows quirked up and his lips curled in a mischievous smile. 

“I don’t know what school you went to, but eating me out isn’t going to get me pregnant.”

He was now lying beside you, his hand pulling up the covers to help warm you up, “Haven’t you heard? The semen is stored in the spit.”

“That is an absolutely batshit crazy thing to say at nine in the morning,” you threw a pillow at his face. He erupted in a fit of laughter and leaned down to pepper kisses on your cheeks, making you giggle and squirm. 

“It’s noon, my love. You were out of it for a while.”

Your eyes flew open in shock. That means you’ve been asleep for well over ten hours. Getting fucked by Jay has exhausted you enough to fix your broken sleeping schedule. You haven’t gotten a decent sleep ever since you moved in, and even before that you had frequent insomnia, so the fact that you were able to get a full night’s rest and then some was delighting you. “Well, how long have you been awake?” You asked. 

“Honestly, I couldn’t get much,” he laid his head in between your breasts. You were quite ticklish to the feeling of his hair brushing on your chest, but you didn’t say anything and just began running your fingers through it. 

“Why is that?”

“You told me you loved me, Y/N. Any man would go sleepless.”

You suppose you did, however, you didn’t expect him to be so affected by it. You brushed the hair from his forehead and asked, “Do you?”

“Do I what?”

“Do you love me back?”

“There must be nothing in that beautiful head of yours if you need to ask me that. I’ve been in love with you for a very long time,” he chuckled. He pressed a kiss to your breast and began squeezing it like it was some stress ball. You were amused at how nonchalant he was about it like it wasn’t turning you on all over again. 

“How long? I mean we barely met a month ago.”

Jay fell silent for a few moments. He suddenly felt a wave of guilt come over him as he realised how little you truly knew about him compared to how much he knew about you. He couldn’t tell you that he’s been practically stalking you for the past two years, but he already has been revealing things that his mother would have killed him for telling you. He decided to tell you the half-truth, “We met before.”

“Yeah, at events and stuff, but we’ve never talked before that.”

He shook his head, “I’m quite offended you forgot about our meet cute, my love. Three years ago, at the New Year’s Gala.” You raised your eyebrow, not recalling what he was talking about. He pressed another kiss on your skin and continued, “I found you crying outside of the venue. You told me you got into a fight with your boyfriend.”

It suddenly all flashed back. The dim lights of the hallway surrounding the gala venue, your ruined make-up, your crying so intense you could barely breathe. You may or may not have been a bit intoxicated. It wasn’t clear to you what exactly that fight with Sunghoon was about, but all you were certain of was that he was going to break up with you. 

You were so messed up that night that you buried the memories in the back of your mind, quickly dismissing them after Sunghoon apologised and took you back into his arms. 

Jay knew from your silence you were thinking about Sunghoon, and his annoyance and jealousy led him to flick your nipple, making you yelp.

“Ow! What was that for?” You responded by flicking him on the forehead, however, disappointed at his lack of reaction. 

“Nothing,” he mumbled, pressing his face back into your chest. You rolled your eyes. You couldn’t believe how he was acting like a baby as if it wasn’t he who mentioned your ex. 

“Wait so, is that when you started liking me? That’s like three years, and you didn’t say anything? Didn’t you have a girlfriend—,” You were stopped when you felt Jay’s finger pressed up against your lips.

“Shh, let’s not talk about that,” he whispered. You giggled at his action, even as he continued, “And she wasn’t my girlfriend. Just someone who refused to leave me alone.”

That made you happy for some reason. You didn’t think of yourself as jealous or possessive but you grinned with the new-found knowledge that he fell for you so quickly and couldn’t care less about the women following him around.

He placed one final kiss on your breast and stood up from the bed, stretching his arm out for you, “We should go take a shower.”

You looked at his hand with suspicion etched on your face, amusing Jay. “We should just go shower, right?”

Jay smirked at your insinuation, rubbing his hands over his face to try to hide his expression, “I just need to wash you up, I didn’t get the chance to yesterday since you were so out of it.”

“I can wash myself,” you said stubbornly. You had an inkling that Jay would pounce on you the moment he got you into the shower, given how many hours it took for him to be satisfied last night. The look in his eyes alone screamed insatiable. Your body however was too sensitive and you wanted to give your poor pussy a break from his abuse.

“Alright, then stand up,” he ordered. His menacing smirk was pissing you off, and you were determined to prove him wrong. You shakily climbed towards the edge of the bed, barely being able to balance yourself on your arms, unaware of how much Jay’s cock hardened at the sight of you crawling towards him with your naked and love-mark-covered body. 

You managed to stand up on wobbly legs, a pain shooting up your body at the awkward movements. You looked up towards Jay’s eyes, annoyed that his smirk was still there. “Now walk,” he added, and you felt yourself become wet at his stern and dominating tone.

You were nervous about your ability to do so but tried not to show it on your face. You took one step and you began to fall, too weak and shaky to make it any further. You didn’t hit the ground due to Jay grabbing you up by the waist. He picked you up in a princess style and you wrapped your arms around his shoulder, giving up your ambitions and accepting that you’d need his help.

“Fine, fine…We can shower together. Just shower though, you know I’m exhausted” you scolded him.

He smiled at you, placing a peck on your lips, “Just shower,” he agreed.

“You promise?” You looked up at him with your lovely and hypnotising eyes. 

He nodded back, “I promise, my love.”

He lied. Obviously. You were an absolute fool for believing him. 

The steam of the hot water was fogging up the glass of the shower door, as well as making it hard for you to properly think. Jay had you bent over, palms and tits pressed up against the cold glass. Your whines and the sound of your skin slapping were loud as he pounded into your cunt from behind you, and you were dizzy at the feeling of his cock splitting you open and the water hitting your back. You could feel the tip almost hitting your cervix. He was pounding inside you with no mercy. 

“Doesn’t this remind you of yesterday? When I took you in the rain,” Jay boasted. You couldn’t bring yourself to respond, but you agreed. This was much better though, given the water was warm and you weren’t afraid of someone catching you in the act. 

He reached forward to begin playing with your clit, causing a whimper to erupt from your mouth, “J-Jay. Slow down, ‘m gonna c-cum…” 

“So quickly? We just started, my love, surely you can hold out for longer,” he chuckled, fastening his pace on your clit and gripping tighter at your hips.

You sobbed out in pleasure, shaking your head, indicating that you aren’t going to be able to hold it in and will cum at any moment, especially with the stimulation from your clit as well as the inside of your cunt.

You heard him tsk behind you, and he began slowing his movement, eventually coming to a halt. You whined, “No…please, Jay. Please, let me cum.”

He harshly spanked your ass, making you hiss, “Didn’t you just tell me to slow down? Have I fucked you so dumb you can’t even make up your mind?”

You felt tears streaming down your face at the sudden loss of friction and pleasure, your cunt clenching painfully on his still cock. You subconsciously started moving your hips up and down on his length, trying to relieve your needs yourself, before Jay grabbed you by your neck and pushed your back flush against his chest. 

You felt him strike you again on your hip, hissing at the soreness of your skin, “Fuck, you’re such a desperate whore. Would you even be able to live without my cock?”

He used one hand to grip your waist, halting your bouncing on his cock. You shook your head, knowing that he had now ruined you for any other person, and you couldn’t imagine a life without him anymore.

“Answer me,” he tightened his grip on your waist. You, however, were far too disoriented to reply to him, given his fingers wrapped around your throat, the feeling of his skin on your back, the steam and the hot water hitting your body and his cock still deep inside you. You incoherently babbled something back to him.

You wailed again as he bent you over once more and thrust his cock back inside you. Your insides felt like they were on fire. Your hands began to shake and your palms slipped down from the glass, so you reached behind you to grip Jay’s biceps. 

“Tell me, Y/N. Tell me how much you love my cock. Tell me you could never live without me.”

You nodded weakly, “Yes, b-baby. F-Fuck, I love y-your…your cock! You’re it f-for me.”

You couldn’t see him, but you were sure he was smirking to himself at your words. He placed a kiss on the back of your head as a thank-you. 

“You can cum now, my love.”

Your eyes rolled back and your legs started shaking as you felt yourself cum around his cock. Jay wrapped his arms around to help steady you and groaned at the feeling of your clenching cunt. He came a few moments afterwards, mind melting at the feeling of you milking him dry.

You were in bliss at the feeling of his warm cum spilling inside you, filling you to the brim. You wished you were facing him so could kiss him and thank him for making you feel so good. You loved him immensely and wished you could be like this for eternity. Forever in his arms, just like this. 

“Don’t let a single drop go to waste, okay?”

You weren’t sure how you were going to do that, given you already felt some of it spilling out of you, but you nodded nonetheless. 

The next few moments were a blur. Jay washed you up. It was quite a weird experience getting shampooed with a dick inside you, but your mind was far too hazy to care. 

You then remember sitting on the bathroom sink as Jay wrapped you around in a towel, drying your hair and skin, making sure to go slowly and softly to not overwhelm you. He picked you up and brought you back to your bedroom.

He grabbed a body moisturiser from the nightstand and began rubbing your body with it. He wanted to help relax your muscles, soothing away the soreness that resulted from yesterday’s activities. 

He messages the lotion onto your legs, trailing up to your abdomen, and then finally to your breasts. You began to notice he had a weird fixation on your tits. He was palming at them, taking a longer time than he did with the rest of your body. When you looked at his face, you felt amused at the look of seriousness on it, as if he were taking a final exam.

“Jay, I swear if you’re getting hard over this I will—”

“I’m not, I promise,” he grinned childishly, “They’re just so fun to play with, can you blame me?”

You lifted your foot and placed the sole of it on his crotch, feeling how it was getting hard and stiff. You murmured, “You lying bastard.” 

Technically speaking, he was an actual bastard, but Jay decided not to make that comment. He instead threw his head back to laugh, “Okay, okay, I lied. I swear I’ll leave you alone this time. Just let me massage you, so you won’t be so sore later.”

“Alright then, go ahead.”

You laid there as he kept massaging you. He was so gentle with you, completely in contrast with how he was earlier. It was as if he thought you’d break if he was pressed any harder. The way he held you was incredibly intimate, making you feel warm inside. He looked so beautiful. You didn’t feel any sort of discomfort at being bare and vulnerable in front of him, instead you felt completely safe.

You raised your hands to try to brush his hair away from his face, but he pushed it away, telling you, “Relax, my love. Please.”

You obliged, letting him have his way with you.

It was the first time you and Jay sat together in the dining room. The space was devoid of any staff, as they left after serving your lunch. You were quiet, looking down worriedly at your food.

“Why aren’t you eating, my love? Do you not like it?” Jay voiced, reaching over to grab your hand.

You shook your head embarrassingly, “I just…I feel like the staff is ignoring me. When I walked here, none of them even looked at me.” You were aware that the servants generally didn’t acknowledge you much, but they never looked so flustered around you as they did today.

Jay threw his head and began laughing loudly, making you even more embarrassed, “I guess you weren’t quiet enough, but who can blame you? I’m amazing in bed.”

“Jay, I will throw this tomato at you,” You fumed, your eyebrows furrowing in a way that made Jay gush at how adorable you looked. He couldn’t stop laughing after you put your face into your palms and groaned. 

“Y/N, it’s fine. They’re probably surprised at your change of heart since you’ve been treating me like the plague for all of last month,” He had a point, but you still felt ashamed that the poor staff had to witness your blaring sex noises. 

Jay on the other hand wasn’t feeling nearly as sorry. Most of the staff staying late into the night were the guards, and he knew a few of them to share unsavoury glances towards you, especially your personal guard, Marco. They made it disgustingly obvious how much they would take you if you were to give them the chance. 

He smirked at the thought of them having to hear all your noises throughout the odd hours of the night, not being able to do anything about it. That should teach them to never look or breathe your way unless necessary. He placed a kiss on your knuckles and decided to change the subject to help distract you from your embarrassment, “What do you think about having your sister come over?”

Your eyes lit up. Gods, you missed Karina. It was killing you to not know how she was doing, “Yes! Please! Let’s have her over for dinner tonight, yeah? Oh Gods, I missed her so much,” you slapped your palms together and squealed. 

Although your mind was mostly preoccupied with Jay, you never forgot how you didn’t get to bid farewell to your sister because she was on a trip during the whole moving process. You were sure she was distressed with not knowing how you were or how to reach you.

“I’ll go call her then,” Jay smiled at you and left the room to go find his phone. Jay thought it’d be better to call her as soon as possible given how long the drive is from your former family home to his. He, however, wasn’t looking forward to the conversation.

“Park Jongseong?! Oh, you have a lot of audacity calling me now. You steal my fucking sister in the middle of the night and now you’re calling me acting like nothing happened? Where is my sister?! I will kill you, motherfucker!” Karina was belting so loudly that Jay had to stretch his arm out to not burst his eardrums. 

He sighed and rolled his eyes, very much expecting this reaction from her. Karina was known for her protective nature when it came to her little sister and was high up on Jay’s list of the most terrifying women in the world. He was lucky he proposed to you while she was away, not even wanting to think of the tantrums he would have to deal with. He had a feeling she would have barricaded you to stop you from having to leave if she could.

“Nice to hear from you too, Karina,” he muttered sarcastically. 

That made her even more infuriated as she continued yelling, “You fucking prick! You’re lucky I’m not there because I’d rip your throat out with my bare hands if I could, you bitch! Do you think because your mommy has all the power in the world you can just go around acting like you own the place? Give my sister back you asshole!” 

“Karina, I suggest you calm down. I’m calling because your sister wants something from you. And just for your information, my mother was the one that arranged all this, blame her.”

He could hear Karina’s breathing relax. She answered with a shockingly soft tone, ignoring the last part of his words, “She needs something? Of course, I’ll be there. Tell her that.” 

Jay found it far too hilarious how quickly her demeanour changed. “She wants you to come over for dinner tonight. Is your schedule—,” he was cut off by her excited gasp.

“Of course! I’ll free up my schedule. I’ll be there. Give me the address,” she beamed.

He was amused at her sudden change in demeanour, chuckling to himself. 

“What the fuck are you laughing at? You cunt!”

He ignored her, “I’ll be away running errands tonight which should leave you two plenty of time to catch up.”

“Oh, so what? You’re too much of a coward to face me?”

She wasn’t necessarily wrong. He wasn’t interested in dealing with Karina’s drama today, but even if he were to stay for the dinner, she’d probably be pissed and ask him to leave so there was really no winning on his part. He sighed.

“I will let your sister know you’ll be coming.”

“Wait, why doesn’t she—”

He hung up. 

You saw the car drive up to the entrance, and from the front, you saw your family’s chauffeur. Then came out Karina, who smiled so wide she shined like the sun. She came running towards you and you almost fell over when she tackled you, embracing you tightly. 

“Y/N! I missed you so much,” she began showering her eyes through your body, then tightly grabbing your shoulders, “Are you hurt? Did he hurt you? Tell me exactly what he did to—,” her voice was rushed and desperate.

In contrast, yours was calm and collected as you tried to ease her worries, “I’m okay. We’ll discuss everything once you’re inside.”

You could tell in Karina’s eyes she couldn’t quite believe your words. For all she knew, you were being held hostage, being threatened by Jay not to say anything. 

You hooked your arms around hers and walked her through the manor towards the dining room. It was beautifully decorated as per your request, wanting everything to be absolutely perfect for your sister. 

“Any preference for your drink?” you asked softly.

“White wine is fine,” she murmured, glaring at all the servants walking around the room. 

You both sat down, and Karina still had a heavy layer of suspicion etched on her face. She almost flinched when Sara came up behind her to pour the wine into her glass. You clapped your hands and declared, “My sister and I would like some privacy for the evening.” The servants scattered out of the room, and you noticed Karina’s shoulders deflate in relaxation. 

“I don’t want Jongseong’s spies to be listening in on our conversations,” she muttered, glaring at the silver platter of food in front of her.

You were quite amused at her attitude, although knowing she wasn’t exactly wrong. You knew your actions made it back to Jay through the watchful eyes and listening ears of the servants and guards, much to your frustration. “Tell me how you like the pasta, I asked Minseo to make you your favourite—”

Karina stabbed her food with a fork and groaned, “Y/N, I’m not here to talk about fucking pasta,” you flinched at her tone. Her eyes softened at the look on your face, “I’m sorry. I’ve just…This entire month I’ve been feeling insane. I cried every night because I was the reason why all of this happened to you,” her voice cracked at the last part.

Your eyes flew open, “Karina, what are you talking about? None of this is your fault.”

Karina’s eyes were welling up, “I never should’ve gotten involved with Heesung.”

You knew from the beginning that your sister’s relationship with such a dangerous man from the underground of Olympus would get the family into trouble, but you never wished for it. Karina being the heir to the family company made it especially more tricky.

Although your dad loved you both equally, you were only the spare in case something happened to Karina, so he never particularly cared about your entanglements, such as the fact that you were in a relationship with a low-class man. 

As far as you remember, your father had no idea about Karina’s relationship, but ever since the Parks began their siege, you don’t doubt your father has been made in the know and gone to great lengths to end it.

“What happened to him?” you asked.

“To say Dad was upset would be an understatement,” Karina chuckled through her tears. “He threatened to send his men after Heesung and his family if he ever went near me again, so we cut off contact. Haven’t heard from him for over a month.”

You pressed your palms on your forehead, appalled at the state of your family right now. Your father was not known to be a violent person but you could imagine with the state of the company and family right now, he goes to any lengths to protect them. Compared to what your father and sister were going through, the past month has been peace and bliss for you. 

“I’m going to get you out of here soon, Y/N, trust me.”

You looked down, too afraid to meet her pleading eyes, “I don’t wish to leave.”

Karina stopped all her movements and the look she sent your way sent a shiver down your spine, “What?”

“I’m fine here.”

Her eyes were bulging in shock at your calm tone, “What do you mean you’re fine? You were threatened to marry a man you didn’t even know. You were going to get engaged to Sunghoon, I mean what—”

“This is what I wanted to discuss with you, Karina,” you put your wine glass down. Karina furrowed her eyebrows, but with a slight bit of patience left in her body, she motioned for you to keep going, “My engagement to Jay is the least of your worries right now because I’m fine. I’m not hurt, I’m safe and Jay will protect me from—”

You heard the floor creak as Karina stood up from her chair, “Protect you?! From what, his own family? Y/N, what the fuck are you talking about?”

You sighed, wishing Karina could just understand where you were coming from, “I’m just trying to tell you that you don’t have to worry about me. Jay cares about me, he—”

“This is fucking insane. Is he making you say all this? Is it Stockholm syndrome?”

You began walking up towards her, “You don’t know him, Karina. I trust him completely.”

“Then he manipulated you! Him and his bitch of a mother. Y/N this isn’t right, he is a monster, he does not care about you because why else would he take you from us? Keeping you locked away in a fortress is not a sign that he cares about you, he wants to control you. They have complete control over Dad because you’re here. He thinks that if he steps out of line against the Parks, they will kill you!”

You never thought of it that way, assuming you didn’t have a particularly large part to play in the war between your and Jay’s families, however, you still felt the utmost trust towards Jay.

“Karina…please,” you put your hand on her cheek, brushing away her tears of frustration, “Jay would never let something like that happen to me. Please, believe me.”

Karina's eyes squinted as she looked like she was thinking. She fumed, “You’re in love with him, aren’t you?” The look on her face was terrifying, reminiscent of all the times she contemplated killing someone for hurting you. You stayed silent, not being able to look into her scowling eyes. She shook her head and sighed heavily, placing her face into her palms. “You stupid, stupid girl. How can you not understand that he’s not a good man?”

“He doesn’t have to be a good man for me to trust him,” you whispered. You knew you sounded insane, but you were honest. You knew from the gossip around high society that Jay was not a kind man, there often being rumours of him being just as violent as his mother, if not more. 

Maybe it wasn’t logical, but all the times he told you that he loved you, you believed him and knew in your heart he would never hurt someone he loved.

Karina sighed, sitting back in her chair and wrapping her arms around your torso. “They took you from me, Y/N. They made me think I was the reason you were suffering.”

“I understand Karina, but look at me now. I am safe.”

Karina wasn’t letting go of the suspicions she held for Jay but knew you were going to be stubborn. Generally speaking, you did look okay. In fact, you were glowing from within, utterly in love and happy. She remembered the dark circles that used to adorn your face back when you struggled with insomnia, that were beginning to fade. Not to mention how your body looked fuller and healthier compared to how sickly you looked before. 

Karina trusted you were doing well, but didn’t trust Jay to not betray you. She wasn’t sure what she was going to do about him but decided to leave it for now. 

“I’ll kill him if he lays a hand on you,” she lied. She was far too weak to hurt Jay and knew there was practically nothing she could do given the power of his family.

“Karina…,” you sighed, cradling her head.

“I love you, Y/N. I don’t want what happened to Mom to happen to you,” she began sobbing.

“Don’t you dare say that,” you tried to comfort her. 

After you managed to calm her down, you sat back in your chair and tried to continue your dinner normally, pretending like your lives were the same as they used to be. You asked her about her trip, and she asked you what books you’ve been reading. The sky became dark, and eventually, you and Karina called it a night. 

Standing at the entrance, you watched as Karina walked down the marble steps towards the car. Before she could step into it though, she quickly ran back up and embraced you once more. 

She desperately wanted to stay, spend every waking moment protecting you from the dangers of the world like she used to. 

“We’ll see each other again, Karina,” you whispered.

“Of course. I’ll just miss you so much.”

Once she finally left, you stood there in front of the doors to the manor, your hair blowing in the wind of the late evening. You were still trying to process everything Karina told you. As of now, the people you trusted the most were your sister and your husband, but what were you to do when they were on opposing sides?

You were rubbing the serum into your face, staring intently at your reflection in the bathroom mirror. It had been about an hour since Karina left, and your mind was reeling at the events of the night, still conflicted inside you. 

You saw Jay’s figure walk into the bathroom, stalking slowly behind you. He pressed his chest against your back and leaned down to kiss your neck. He was trying to ignore the feeling his crotch pressed up against your ass. 

You were getting ready for bed, so you were only in your panties and an oversized shirt that you found in Jay’s closet, hoping he wouldn’t mind you taking his things. He wrapped his arms around your stomach and asked, “How did it go, my love?”

You knew you shouldn’t have lied, but you didn’t wish to worry Jay, and maybe a small part of you was trying to be more careful about the things you said around him ever since Karina reminded you just how untrustworthy he was, “It went really well,” you grinned into the mirror. 

“I’m glad,” he whispered. He sounded tired, and although that was true, he was also lying about his interest in your day. He couldn’t care less about how things went with Karina as long as you were okay. He understood he wasn’t being the best brother-in-law, but he didn’t invite her over because he wanted to feel closer to his family. All he cared about was your happiness, but didn’t concern himself with anyone that involved in it that wasn’t him.

“What’s that?” he nudged his chin towards the bottle of moisturiser you picked up.

You raised your eyebrows, “you’ve never used face moisturiser before?”

He shook his head, taking the bottle from your hand and inspecting it, “I kept wondering why Minseo bought these little bottles for you.”

You rolled your eyes, “you’re telling me you don’t do any skincare?”

“Nope, I just know you put that cream over your body after you shower.”

You threw your head back in frustration, “How on earth is your skin so clear then? That is so unfair,” you were utterly envious of just how perfect he was.

He chuckled into your shoulder, turning you around to face him, “Why don’t you put some on me?” 

You felt him grip your waist and pull you close, close enough to hear the sound of his breathing. You took a fingerful of the moisturiser and began rubbing it into his cheeks. His smile was loving and warm, mesmerised by your soft touch and your intense focus on his skin. 

His skin was so smooth, it almost made you want to cry. Fuck, he was truly the most gorgeous and flawless man in the world. How did you think you wouldn’t have fallen for him so deeply?

Once you were done, he did the same to you, gently rubbing the cream into your face and neck. You could tell he wasn’t used to doing this, his technique being very sloppy, unlike the one he had when he was rubbing your body that morning. 

You both stood there in silence as you stared at each other, and he could tell in your eyes how affected you were by the intimacy of it all. Your body was hot, your nipples were hardening at the pressure of his chest against them, and your panties were beginning to dampen. 

You gulped as he lowered his hands down to your hips and pulled you closer, your body now completely flush against his. It was impossible to ignore the feeling of his bulge pressed up against you.

“I want to make you feel good tonight,” you whispered in his ear, trailing your hands down his chest. 

He tightened his grip on your hips and said, “You always make me feel good.”

You shook your head, leaning down on your knees, looking up at him with your doe eyes that could’ve melted him into a puddle, “Not like that.”

His breathing became heavier as you unzipped his dress pants and pulled them down. Your back was arched and your eyes were focused solely on how large his bulge had already gotten. You followed by slowly trailing down his boxers. His cock sprung up, hard and already leaking with precum. Gods, he was so greedy for you that it was almost embarrassing how much you affected him. 

You wrapped your hand around his cock and began pumping it up and down as Jay groaned at the pleasure. It was slightly sloppy, much to your embarrassment. “I’m not very good at this,” you said sheepishly. Your eyes were shiny and your face heated up at the admission. Although you weren’t a virgin, you were not very skilled at blowjobs.

Fuck, you were like a nymph that was brought into this world to make Jay go completely mad. You looked so beautiful, and oddly innocent as you were pumping his erection while looking softly into his eyes. He wanted to ruin you. He wished he could keep you around him forever. Even with how inexperienced you seemed, he had to hold himself back from not cumming right then and there.

You finally wrapped your lips around his tip, worried at how much of his cock you could truly take. He sighed in relief as you began bobbing your head up and down, sucking him off as your life depended on it.

He was going to let you take control and be gentle with you because of how timid you seemed, but he couldn’t wait to imagine training your throat to take him properly. He wanted to take you like this over and over again, fucking your face and decorating it with his cum. That would be for another day, though, and he prided himself on his patience. 

You couldn’t manage to take his entire length, gagging at only the halfway point, so you used your hands to pump the base of his cock. He smirked knowing your mouth could barely handle his size yet. 

His groans were loud, his hands were running through your hair, trying to move it away from your face. He felt his orgasm nearing and told you as much. 

He tried to push you back, not wanting to spill himself inside your throat so as not to shock you, but you whined and shook your head. There were tears brimming in your eyes, but you held kept pumping his cock inside your mouth and in your hands, your face hot and your eyes sultry as you desperately wanted to taste him. You wanted every part of him inside you, including his seed, so you weren’t about to let him go.

Jay was shocked at your persistence and desperation. He finally spilled inside and you felt his cum coat your throat. It was warm, and you swallowed every last drop. 

Once you were satisfied you let go and bent over, palms on the floor. You were trying to catch your breath and relax, and felt Jay embrace you and began rubbing your back in an attempt to soothe you like he always does. “You were amazing.”

“I tried my best,” you managed to say in between coughs.

“You were incredible,” he reiterated. “I was just shocked that you swallowed, you seemed like you were really struggling,” he chuckled.

You rolled your eyes at how he was practically boasting about the size of his cock. You lightly slapped him on the shoulder and said, “I wasn’t about to let you cum all over my face and ruin my skincare.”

He grabbed your head and placed a kiss on your temple, “Another time, then,” you felt the smirk on his lips against your skin.

For weeks following that, you and Jay were completely inseparable. You couldn’t imagine living a life without him, and he couldn’t handle the thought of you being out his sight for even one moment.

Jay stopped visiting his father at night, instead choosing to spend it with you, doing whatever it was that you wanted, taking you wherever you wished. 

You were physically tired almost every day due to your ever-so-active sex life. Jay took you anywhere that he felt like. 

One day, you two were playing pool and Jay couldn’t help but focus intently on the way you bent your body over the pool table. The game ended with your chest pressed up against the fabric of the table, your skirt lifted up to your waist, and Jay’s cock pounding away inside you.

He would frequently take you back to the gazebo where your love for him blossomed to what it was now, and he fucked you there in practically every position you could think, and each time you felt fearful and yet also enticed by the risk of someone catching you two.

When he took you to restaurants, it was not uncommon for him to slip a vibrator inside you and increase the setting every time the waiter came around to check on you, making you shake in nervousness and stutter in response.

Although it was rare, he would sometimes let you be on top. Just a few nights ago, you two were watching a film by the fireplace when an intimate scene came on and you couldn’t hold yourself back from getting on top of him and desperately riding his cock. Your moans were loud that evening, and you got so exhausted that Jay had to help you by gripping your hips and guiding you. It didn’t take long for him to flip you over though, and take control away from you, but you greatly enjoyed your brief moment on top of him.

It was an understatement to say you two were utterly insatiable for each other.

You were now getting ready for bed, your body wrapped in a bathrobe after your hot shower. Jay was in his office, you believe he was making a few business calls, but weren’t entirely sure. After doing your skincare, you went into your bedroom and began changing into your pyjamas.

Right as you were about to start buttoning up your silk sleeping shirt, your personal guard came into the room, making you gasp and grab a nearby pillow to cover your chest. The material of your clothes was thin and you weren’t partially comfortable with him seeing you like this. 

“Marco?! What are you doing here? Is everything alright?”

Marco nodded, not doing anything to soothe your worried reaction to him intruding on you. You were appalled at his lack of manners, because what man doesn’t knock before walking into a lady’s room? “Mr. Park just wanted to let you know he’ll be up here in about fifteen minutes.”

You nodded nervously, “Yes, of course. Thank you for letting me know. You can go now.”

He didn’t listen, instead, he slowly walked up to your shaking body and asked you, “May I?” pointing at your shirt. He gently took away the pillow from your hands, and even though you held onto it for dear life, his strength made it all too easy to leave you bare for him. 

You placed your arms over your chest, trying to cover it, but he placed his hands on them and tried to calm you, “Could I just button them up for you?.”

His grip on your arms was tight as he managed to spread them open. He began buttoning up your shirt slowly and making sure to brush his hands against your bare skin. Marco did not think very highly of you, although being mesmerised by your beautiful body. It was getting harder for him to ignore his desire to fuck you open in your marriage home. He used to wonder about what it would be like to be your paramour, given how little seemed to like Jay in the beginning. 

You were disgusted by his touch and sternly said, “Marco. Leave, right now.”

Right as he finished with the last button, he stepped back and your breathing intensified at the events that just transpired. You sent a glare at him, and began raising your voice, “Get the fuck out!”

Marco had no reaction on his face, no remorse for disrespecting you, and just as he was at the door to leave, he turned around and with the most frightening tone, said, “Mr. Park is a lucky man to have you as his bride.”

Once he left, you ran up to the door and shut it as hard as you could. You pressed your back against it and loudly sighed in relief now that he was gone. You immediately ripped off your clothes and threw them in the laundry bin, not wanting any bit of Marco touching your body. You thought you would have to burn it once you had the chance.

You turned off the lights and laid yourself in bed. Your breath was shaky and your mind was heavy. 

After a while, once your body managed to calm down and you began forcing yourself to try and sleep, you felt the door creak open again. You flinched.

“Jay?” you called out, wanting to make sure you weren’t in danger again.

“Yes, my love?” he replied. He sounded exhausted. 

You felt him lay beside you and you immediately turned around to wrap your arms around him tightly. You weren't sure how you were going to tell him about Marco, or whether you should tell him at all. You were now terrified of living in this house.

Jay felt your heavy breathing in the crook of his neck and knew you were thinking about something that worried you, “Is everything okay?”

You nodded weakly. “Yes. I’m okay,” you lied.

“You know you can tell me anything, right?”

“Of course, baby.”

That night, Jay felt a sense of dread as he felt you distancing yourself once more. He knew you weren’t telling him something. Although he understood it would take you longer than just a few months to fully trust him, he desperately wanted to know what it was that was hurting you. 

Before Jay could step foot out of his office, Minseo came into the room rushed and ever so slightly dishevelled. She looked as if she saw something terrible transpire. 

“Mr. Park, a word alone please,” she said breathily, “It concerns Mrs. Park.”

Jay’s eyes flew open, “What? Is she alright? I saw her just half an hour ago, what happened?”

Minseo looked down, her face red in a mixture of fury and worry for you. “I witnessed something bad happen to her last night.” 

Jay furrowed his eyebrows. He knew it. He fucking knew it and he was appalled that you hadn't told him about it. He stepped closer to Minseo, “Tell me what happened, please. Don’t leave a detail out.” Who do I have to kill? He didn’t say the last part out loud, but Minseo knew already the dangers that came the way of the man who laid his hands on you.

“It was Marco,” Jay’s eyes darkened at her words, “I saw him enter her room while she was changing. She begged him to leave, of course, she was practically naked. He forcefully grabbed her and placed his hands on her chest. He left after she screamed at him one last time,” Minseo’s breathing was uneasy as she imagined the stress you might have been under. She could tell from Jay’s body that he felt murderous, but was holding himself back from losing his cool in front of her.

She couldn’t bring herself to look Jay in the eye when she continued, “I am so sorry, Mr. Park. I wish I could’ve gone in there and stopped him, but I was afraid of his strength. You hire such strong men to protect you I was afraid he would’ve used that strength against me. I know it was selfish, I beg you to forgive me. I am so sorry your wife had to get hurt under my watch,” her eyes were brimming with tears, and she didn’t calm down as Jay awkwardly patted her shoulder to calm her. 

“None of this is your fault. Please find Marco and bring him to me,” he said through his clenched teeth and reeling mind. 

“Right away,” she said but before she could leave he said one final thing.

“Stay close to Y/N. As of now, you’re the only one in this house I trust to be around her.”

It had been a few hours since Jay suddenly left the manor, much to your surprise. You didn’t get the chance to ask where he went, and when you asked Minseo, she gave a vague answer about him wanting to visit his father once more.

You felt suspicious regarding her answer but decided to leave it alone. You thought you would have eaten dinner alone that night but Minseo decided to join you. Although it was odd, you did appreciate the company.

Minseo stayed close by to you the entire night, right as you went to bed. For hours you just laid on your mattress, awake and wondering what it was that had Jay missing for so long. A part of you was embarrassed by how dependent you had become on him that a single night away was causing you to act this way. Another part of you went back to the words shared by your sister the night she came for dinner. All about the dangers that come with entailing yourself in Jay’s life. 

You heard the whispered sound of running water in the bathroom across Jay’s bedroom and stood up to begin walking towards it. In the dim lighting of the hallway, you saw Jay’s silhouette bent over the sink and washing his hands.

“Baby? How did your visit go?” you asked timidly. He didn't say anything, and as you walked closer you began to feel confused at his white shirt that was no longer white. It was covered in massive pools of red and his skin. His hair was wet from the sweat and by Gods, he looked like an absolute mess. Your eyes widened and you placed your hands over your mouth in shock. “Jay?! What happened? Are you alright?” you said, reaching over to grip his bicep. 

He stared at your reflection in the mirror, and you felt a shiver run up your spine at his terrifyingly dark stare. He again stayed silent for a while, letting your shock wash over you. 

Then he began, “I had to hear it from Minseo of all people.”

Your hands were shaking ever so slightly, eyes trailing over his body and noticing he had no cuts or wounds, leading you to believe this was someone else’s blood. “What?” you whispered. 

You flinched as he turned around and slammed the door shut behind you. He grabbed your shoulders and forced you to look into his eyes, “A man laid his hands on you,” his breathing was hard, “he hurt you and I had to hear it from fucking Minseo?” he asked. His voice was rough but not loud. 

You began putting the pieces together and realised the blood on his clothes that was now transferring over to you was belonging to your old guard. You had no words, focused solely on his murderous stare. 

You managed to muster up, “Why did you kill Marco?”

He growled, “That’s a stupid fucking question, but I’ll entertain you,” his voice was menacing, “No man who lays a hand on my wife will make it out alive. I made sure that bastard suffered until his last dying breath.” 

There were tears brimming in your eyes. You’ve never been so terrified by the man standing before you, and a part of you desperately wanted to leave his grasp. You gently cupped his face with cold hands, “You shouldn’t have done that, Jay. I was going to tell you eventually. You could have fired him, but now—”

“Fire him?! Are you mad? Fire him so he could go work with another family and assault their women?” He was fuming, “I do not believe you would have told me anything because I know a part of you still doesn’t trust me. I’ve tried to make you believe that I’m not a monster, but I’m done with that bullshit.” 

You did trust him. Gods you trusted him to an illogical point, but fear was not the same thing as distrust. “Of course I love you, but this is not the man I fell in love with.”

“Oh, you know damn well that’s not true. Who the fuck do you think is responsible for executing my family’s enemies?” Your mouth flew open at the revelation, your mind flashing back to the warning words of your sister.

He sighed, his fists clenching, “If you love me, then show me. Don’t keep secrets from me. Why would you keep that from me?” He turned over his palms and you saw the red streaks of blood and the purple bruises adorning it. Even after he tried washing it, it was still obvious what happened. “Do you see my hands? They’re covered in the blood of a man who dishonoured you, and I’d do it a million times over again. I need you to understand that.” 

This was the real him. Although your presence in his life has made him infinitely times warmer than he used to be, he was built on a foundation of darkness and violence. You were what finally made his cold heart beat to life, and he would do anything to protect you and keep you by his side. 

“Jay…,” you embraced him, not wanting to keep looking at his blood-covered body, “I am so, so sorry. I should have told you everything, but I was in shock. I felt ashamed that I let him touch me and I…,” your trailed off.

He pulled you towards him and began rubbing your hair, feeling guilty now that he didn’t have enough time to process how you may have felt about all this. His insecurities led him to believe you didn’t say anything because you were afraid of him. He imagined resurrecting Marco and killing him over and over again for making you feel this way. 

“You are mine,” he murmured.

“I am yours,” you reiterated, your eyes were shining and pleading.

“I almost went mad, Y/N.”

“I think you did go mad.”

He shook his head, the corner of his lips raising, “You haven't seen me go mad just yet. That was nothing.” He grabbed your jaw and roughly kissed you. Your grip on his shoulder tightened and you felt ashamed by how aroused you became. What he did terrify you to no end, but a part of you, a sick and depraved part of you, liked the possessiveness of his actions and words. You were his, mind and body, and you enjoyed seeing him prove to you as such. 

“You are mine,” he repeated, low and furious, “Every part of you belongs to me.”

He raised his legs to force your cunt on his thigh and began grinding against it, making you whimper. “Y-Yes, baby. I’m all y-yours.” 

He slapped the side of your thighs, which were bare as you wearing your pyjama shorts, making you yelp in pain, “You do not keep secrets from me, do you understand?” 

You nodded, your shorts dampening at his roughness. Your face was heating up and you began to sweat, ashamed at how little control you had over your body. You would have done anything for Jay, and let him take you however he wanted.

Now, you were about to let him fuck you open while covering you in the blood of his enemy. 

“Get on your knees,” he demanded. You rushed to the ground with no hesitation, your face now facing his pelvis. After that night two weeks ago, you hadn’t gotten the chance to go down on him, and you felt yourself leaking into your shorts at the excitement of getting to do it again. “You know what to do.”

You immediately unzipped his trousers all too quickly you wrapped your mouth around his cock. It was all too overwhelming to you how badly you wanted to make him feel good, a part of you hoping to use this as a way of asking for forgiveness. Jay was amused at your desperation, “Gods, look at you. You’re such a slut for my cock.”

You whined around his cock, as you’ve always loved when he talked down to you. Jay’s style of lovemaking was usually a mix of roughness and intense movements alongside soft and reassuring words. However, you never did mind him degrading you. 

Like before, you were struggling to handle his size, but instead of going gently on you, Jay grabbed a fistful of your hair and began gradually fucking himself into your mouth. Your throat desperately tried to take him in smoothly, but you were becoming lightheaded at the abuse on your poor mouth. 

Jay was enjoying seeing you like this, desperate and exhausted, with your cheeks adorned with fat tears from your struggle to take him. Your throat felt incredible, and he made it his goal for you to be able to take it fully eventually. To be fair, you were doing better than last time, but you still had a ways to go. You were slobbering and gagging at the feeling of his tip hitting the back of your head, and Jay knew he would cum soon enough. 

Jay glared when he noticed you trail your hands inside your shorts, taking your own action to relieve the pressure in between your legs. He pulled your face away and you began pumping him, letting his seed spill all over your face. Fuck, the way you looked made him want to devour you whole. 

He leaned down to pick you up and placed you on the sink, taking a handful of your ass and slapping it in fury. You cried out before he grabbed your hand and lifted it up in front of him, seeing it covered in your essence. “I didn’t say you could touch yourself, now did I?” 

You shook your head, “I’m sorry, I…I just…I’m sorry, baby.”

He spanked you again, making tears well up in your eyes once more. He growled, “You don’t get to call me that tonight.”

You nodded nervously, “I’m sorry, sir.”

“You do not do anything unless I tell you to, understand?” 

“Y-Yes, of course. I’m so, so sorry,” your voice was desperate and submissive. 

He turned you around and pulled your shorts down, your ass now on full display for him, already pink from his rough strikes. “I forgive you, my love,” he whispered, “But I’ll have to make an example out of this. I don’t want a bad girl to be under me.”

His hands came back onto your ass, but he didn’t just stop once, instead striking you a few times until your legs were shaking and your skin became sore at the feeling. He plunged his cock inside your pussy with no warning, making your double over in shock and pleasure.

He pounded inside of your cunt, grabbing the hair on the back of your head and pulling it up so you could look at your reflection in the mirror. You were embarrassed at how you looked, so pathetic and desperate and at the whim of Jay’s commands. Your pussy clenched around his cock as you felt it his your cervix, “S-So deep. You’re s-so deep,” you stuttered. 

You felt his balls slapping your clit and your mind was spinning at the mix of stimulants. Fuck, it would take Jay practically seconds to make you cum at this point, and you were indeed right. You clamped around him as you felt yourself climax, but that didn’t stop Jay. He kept rutting himself into you, pulling your hair once more.

“Look at yourself. You look like a whore who was made to take my cock. A desperate and pathetic slut,” you clenched at his crude words, much to the soreness of your pussy from your recent orgasm.

He brought you up to stand and flipped you over once more. He lifted you up by your waist and you wrapped your legs around his torso. Just like before, he wasted no time shoving his cock deep inside you. He brushed away the tears of overstimulation that were brimming in your eyes. 

All the times you’ve taken him, and yet you still couldn’t get used to his size. It truly felt like he was splitting you open every time, and it didn’t help that he was practically treating you like a rag doll right now. He was filled with utter adoration and love for you, so much so that he couldn’t handle the weight of it. 

He placed a kiss on your lips, making you breathless. “I-It’s too much, s-sir. I’m go-going to…cum!” you yelped. You were incredibly sensitive but you could feel your second orgasm nearing itself. You held him as if you were going to fall into a deep tunnel, and your life depended on his stability. “It’s too much, Jay.”

Jay sucked on his teeth and looked at you with mock disappointment, “Oh? It’s too much? What a shame. You’d think after all these nights you’d be able to handle a bit more but here you are, weak and pathetic as ever.” 

You shook your head, wanting to tell him he was wrong, but your voice was stuck in your throat. You were determined to prove to him you could handle his intensity, but how could you when he was right, and you were losing your mind before you could even cum a second time. 

“Do you still want me to slow down?” he asked with a smirk. He was putting up the front that he was testing you, but he was becoming worried this may be too much for you as he felt his sanity come back alive. “Say the word and I’ll stop.”

“Not a chance,” you declared, your stare filled with lust and determination. You were going to prove to him that you could handle anything that he sent your way and tightened your legs to pull him closer inside you. You heard him groan at the feeling and you began seeing stars at his cock going deeper than you were ever used to. 

You are incredible, Jay’s mind was reeling. You never failed to leave him amazed at how much love he could feel for one person. 

He kept pounding on your sensitive cunt, bringing his hands down to start playing with your clit, causing you to moan louder than you had the entire night. Your body was shaking, sweating and glowing. 

Jay was close, and you were even closer. You came around his cock once more, a few thrusts before you felt him spill his warm seed inside you once more. Your clamping pussy was milking every last drop of him, satisfying the desire for Jay to fill you up and get you pregnant. “I’m going to get you pregnant, yeah?” he whispered.

You nodded, your doe eyes shining with the dim yellow lights of the bathroom, “Yes, I beg you.”

“You beg me?” he smirked, “You beg me to fill you with my heir? You don’t have to ask, my love. I can already imagine you swollen with my babies. You would look so beautiful. Fuck, I can’t even imagine how you could look even more beautiful than you do now.” He decided not to mention how he wanted to show every man who encountered exactly who you belonged to, and who was your rightful life partner. 

Gods, he couldn’t breathe at the thought of you two raising a family together. He would do absolutely anything to protect them and would go to the lengths of the world the same he would for you. 

You slumped over and rested your head in the crook of his head, closing your eyes in rest. 

After he washed you up and changed your clothes, he took you back to the bedroom, deciding to deal with the bloodied bathroom another time. 

As you laid on the bed, looking peaceful and in bliss, Jay kissed you on your temple, “You will never understand the extent to which I love you,” he whispered. However, you weren’t awake to hear him. 

Karina had her arms intertwined with yours as you were walking through the lush garden of your backyard. The sun was blaring and the sky was perfectly clear. 

You asked Jay if your sister could come over once more because you missed her presence incredibly, and although you were telling the truth, you left out the part about you still being terrified of what Jay has done to your old guard.

Since that night, Jay had fired your other personal guard, as well as many other staff, believing them to be reckless enough to let Marco slip through the cracks and hurt you. He had hired two new personal guards for you, and one of them was a man he trusted with all his life. His name was Jake Sim, and he was a childhood friend of Jay’s who had previously worked as a guard for the mayor of Olympus.  

Jake was not too far behind you and your sister, a common occurrence whenever Jay was not around you. It was honestly annoying, but you understood why Jay was paranoid. 

“I can tell something is wrong, Y/N,” Karina said lowly, afraid of Jake overhearing what she was saying. 

You looked down at the ground, “Something bad happened last week.”

You explained everything to Karina, only leaving out the part where you came on Jay’s cock two times mere minutes after being told of the death of Marco. Your face heated up at the reminder of your blood-soaked pyjamas.

Karina’s jaw fell at the revelation, and although she fully believed him to be capable of such murder, a part of her hoped you wouldn’t be subject to the horror of his ways. She immediately wrapped her arms around you and began tearing up. 

“That bastard!” Karina screamed, not caring anymore about the fact that you two were not alone.

“Jay just wanted to protect—”

Karina’s head snapped at you and she looked appalled, “I don’t mean him, you dummy! I meant your guard. A horrible, horrible man assaulted my baby sister and I wasn’t there to protect her.” You heard Karina’s voice tremble in fear and worry.

“Karina, stop it,” you gripped her hands, “Stop blaming yourself.”

Karina couldn’t help it. Her mind kept going back to all the mistakes she made that led to you ending up in this situation, living in the same house as a murderous monster. She imagined she would’ve wanted to do the same thing if she found out you were hurt, but chose to ignore that. 

“Y/N, don’t you see? This is why I don’t trust you living with Jay,” Karina began rubbing her forehead.

“Karina, I told you to drop it.”

“He didn’t even hesitate to just kill a man, that is psycho behaviour. You know well enough that was not his first body either,” Karina was fuming. “Y/N, Dad and I have been thinking of how we could get the upper hand on the Parks and get you out of this situation.”

You were confused and a little frustrated at Karina’s refusal to understand you wanted to stay with Jay but nodded your head to let her continue because living in bliss with the love of your life was at the expense of your family's suffering. 

Karina whispered, “Jay’s mother is going on a business trip next week, so the Parks’ manor will be empty except for servants. Dad has a spy who is currently working for Aphrodite and he tells us that Mrs. Park is keeping her blackmail material in a safe in the manor. You will go there with Jay and find it, I will tell you as soon as possible the code and location once I get more information but tell me, can you do this for me?”

You were hesitant, but replied to her, “I will try, but don’t you think this is reckless? The Parks are going to find other ways to control us.”

“Y/N, it’s worth a try. The files they have aren’t only about me and Dad. The things they have about you are horrendous,” she was trembling.

“What?”

“Look, I don’t know the exact details, but you could be in great danger. Please, I’m begging you,” she looked at you with pleading eyes. She didn’t want to admit it, but a part of her felt safe putting you up to this because she knew Jay would never let something bad happen to you. 

You nodded nervously, “I’ll do it.”

You and Jay were walking hand in hand through his mother’s manor, heading towards the dining room where you first met her personally. Jay was confused from the very beginning as to why you wanted so badly to come here, not believing any of your odd and vague reasonings. 

The manor was empty of most servants after his mother went overseas, except for a few that weren’t in your vicinity. 

“Should we have a drink?” Jay quirked his head towards the wine cellar.

“I wouldn’t mind a wine,” you smiled his way, but before he could pull you towards the room, you exclaimed, “Oh! You don’t happen to know if your mother keeps that strawberry champagne, would you?”

Jay’s movements stilled. His soft expression that was plastered across his face dropped immediately and his heart felt like it dropped to the soles of his feet. Surely you weren’t talking about what he was thinking. “What?”

“Oh, I guess you don’t. It was this pink and glittery champagne that your mother infused with strawberries, it was really good,” you said completely unaware of the turmoil inside Jay’s heart.

“Uh…yeah, why don’t you go to the dining room? I’ll go get that for you,” he rushed out of your grasp much to your worry and confusion.

You watched as he tensely walked away from you as though he were running out of time.

You were nervously swaying from leg to leg as your mind was focused on the files that were currently in your purse. While Jay was talking to Jake about something unbeknownst to you, you quickly excused yourself to head to the bathroom and as quickly as you could, you found the safe and managed to take the blackmail files.

The code was still engrained in your mind: 200402, Jay's birthday. It filled you with guilt knowing you were doing this without his knowledge, but you had to help your family in any way you could. You knew Jay would do almost anything for you, but his fear and love for his Mother were heavy; she was where he drew the line.

You didn't get to take a proper look at the files, but you were practically sweating at the thought of stealing something from one of the most dangerous women in the world. Gods, you hoped you didn't royally fuck this up.

At the other end of the manor, Jay’s mind was racing, and his hands were sweating, but he tried to calm himself until he saw the proof. When he entered the cellar, he immediately headed towards the dark brown cabinet behind where all the champagne was stored. His mother commonly kept her most dangerous weapons in there.

When he opened it, his heart dropped as he saw it. The one thing he never wanted to imagine. A vial half-filled with pink syrup, with a white label on the front of, ‘Philtre for the Love of My Son’. 

Jay was fuming, and he violently grabbed the vial before smashing the vial on the ground. He fell to the ground, his hands resting atop the shattered glass of the vial, not caring if his palms began to bleed slowly.

“Drink this.” Jay placed a glass of green-tinted liquid in front of you. You looked up at him and his look instilled fear in you. His eyebrows were furrowed and he was focused solely on the glass. He was furious. 

“What is it, baby?” You asked unsurely. 

“Just drink it.” He looked into your eyes and he was pleading, his eyes shining with a mixture of frustration and despair. It has always been so difficult for you to know what was going through his mind. However, you had an endless amount of trust in Jay and knew in your heart that he would never do anything to hurt you. 

You slowly took a swig of the drink. Once you gulped it all down, you keeled over at how disgusting it tasted. It tasted of bitter and unripe berries, sour and bitter. “Jay, are you trying to kill me?” You tried to make a sarcastic joke to help lighten the mood, but it didn’t seem to help. “What was that?”

“It was an antidote.”

“Antitode?”

“My mother poisoned you, Y/N.”

Your eyes flew open, in both shock and confusion. “I haven’t seen her in over a month how is that—”

“That is exactly when she did it,” Jay turned around and now his back was facing you. Even though you couldn’t see him, you could now tell the inner turmoil that was raging within him. 

Jay had been angry before, but never like this. “There is no such thing as pink champagne, Y/N. At least not in our house. What my mother gave you was…” He trailed off, dropping his gaze to the ground and sighing deeply.

“Whatever it was that she gave me it clearly didn’t work. I’m still alive.”

“You drank my mother’s philtre.”

“A philtre? You mean a—”

“A love potion, Y/N. Meant to artificially induce a feeling of love towards someone. That someone being me, obviously.” His voice was shaky at the end. It dawned on you what this all meant, and why on earth Jay was acting so odd and distant ever since you mentioned the champagne.

“Philtres aren’t real, Jay. That’s all just folktales, your mother was being stupid,” you said, but weren’t even sure if you believed it. As much as you didn’t want to think of his words as true, you knew Jay wasn’t a foolish man.

Jay shook his head, now turned once again to face you. His eyes were glassy now, and you noticed his hands were clenched. You couldn’t stand to see him in such a distressed state. 

“They are real, Y/N. They are all too real.”

You shook your head, not wanting to believe it for a moment. You knew magic and alchemy were a common practice in Olympus hundreds of years ago, but laws surrounding their usage have made them practically a myth.

Jay continued, “My mother never had the physical strength to physically hurt her enemies, let alone would she let blood stain her carefully chosen clothes,” his fists clenched, “so she resorted to poisoning them. Eventually, she realised that controlling people is much more powerful than simply getting rid of them.

She began following the recipes of ancient alchemists and eventually perfected them. It’s how she has so many powerful people under her thumb. Her logic was that if it’s not fear that makes them act in her will, she can just take away their will.

Philtres are another thing completely. I know her to be cruel but,” his voice cracked ever so slightly, “this is monstrous.” 

Jay felt disgusted with himself.

Tears began to fall on your cheeks as the reality of everything began to fall on you. He didn’t believe you to be in love with him, and this entire time he was using your unawareness and intoxication to his favour.

“I mean, I should’ve known. Why else would you have acted so differently after the dinner?” Jay asked. He remembered noticing your shift in demeanour, but a selfish part of him didn’t want to investigate further because he enjoyed your attention and your newfound love for him, as much as it made no sense. 

You immediately got up from your seat, rushing over to get in front of him and place your hand on his shoulder, “I am in love with you, Jay,” your voice was in heavy breathing, “I mean, this is insane. Why would your mom even do that? It makes no sense. She drank the champagne with me, so how did it only effect me? This must be a mistake.”

“That's not how alchemy works, Y/N. When you brew the potions, you can control exactly who will be intoxicated by it," Jay's fists were clenched in anger but his eyes shined with tears. "How could I have not known? She wants to control you. She wants it to hurt when she unleashes her fire on you because that would mean you would lose the love of your life,” he couldn’t look into your eyes. “I’m setting you free now.”

Your face fell, “No, Jay. You don’t mean that.”

“My mother is too much of a danger to you. I need you to leave.”

“I am not leaving, Jay. Please, I need you to understand I love you.”

“It is all fake. You never loved me, how could you love a monster like me?” He remembered the night he confronted your former lover. Sunghoon thought of Jay as an animal and an evil man, and Jay couldn’t help but agree with him now.

You cupped his face, your hands shaking violently, “Jay. Don’t leave me.”

“My mother hurt you, Y/N. I hurt you. I can’t keep having doing it.”

“You will hurt me if you leave me, Jay. I don’t know what your mother fed me but it didn’t matter because I love you. Nothing in that bottle measures up to the true love I have for you. Please believe me,” you said in between hiccups.

Jay gently grabbed the hands that were wrapped around his face, and put them back down, sighing in disappointment. “You have to go, Y/N. I can’t send you back to your family when my mother would just go after you, so I’ll go somewhere far and you can stay back at my manor,” you didn’t fail to notice how he didn’t say ‘our’ manor like he used to.

“Baby…” you trailed off, not knowing what to say. You could barely see anything with how thick the tears were that were flooding your eyes. “Baby, I don’t know what to do to make you believe me. Why can’t you believe that I love you?”

“Because there’s nothing about me that you could love,” his tone was of finality like he couldn’t bring himself to look or speak in your presence ever again. Your heart felt like it shattered, and your breathing became hard. 

Jay had to use all his strength to not come to you and hold you as you let your tears out on his shoulder, and instead picked up his phone.

You watched in despair as Jay turned away from you and placed his phone to his ear, “Jake, I need you to come take Y/N home,” he paused to hear Jake’s response, “No, I won’t be coming.”

[plaguedwithlove]

Based on a asmr roleplay i suddenly remembered a while ago, and i can't find it :((

Yan!Werewolf x Fem!reader

summary:  Why you?...All you wanted was to help your sick father, and it costed you your freedom, innocence, and livelihood

Warnings: my first dark romance story and smut so apologies if this is shit, 18+, stalking, non-con, rough first time, virginity loss, non-con touching, kidnapping, breeding kink, monster-fucking?? but y'all fuck when he's in human form, mentions of and inevitable forced pregnancy

—--

Violent coughs erupted from your father’s room, he had barely made any progress to recovery for about 2 weeks. Rushing up to his room, you give him a small smile and re-wet the cloth on his forehead 

“My loving daughter, I’m ashamed of myself that you devote your time to taking care of your pathetic father, you should be enjoying your young adulthood!..” 

You giggle and shake your head “Oh hush father, you’ve taken care of me since girlhood and now it’s my turn to take care of you, I will stay by your side for as long as I need to.” 

With a teary smile, your father grabs your hand and firmly grasps it “Your mother’s spirit lives in you, she too had such loyalty and love.” 

Returning his smile, you nod “I miss her, papa..”

Although your mother died when you were rather young, merely being 9 when she passed. You still remembered the mundane activities you’ve done with her and you all remember them fondly 

One of your favorite memories with your mother was when you both went for a walk in the forest and she reminisced of how she met your father 

“He slipped on his bottom and I came to his aid, I could see hearts in his eyes..” your mother giggles. She then looks at you and strokes your hair, “One day you’ll meet that someone who gives you the butterflies and you’ll know they’re the one you’ll spend the rest of your life with.” 

Going back to reality, your father speaks “As do I, she would be proud of the beautiful young lady you’ve become.” More coughs escaped from his mouth, your eyebrows furrow in worry 

“Here, papa.” helping your father drink the warm tea, his coughing calms down. “You aren’t getting any much better, I’ll head into town tomorrow and get more medicine. But please rest for now, papa,” 

With a weak nod, your father lies back down but before closing his eyes he gives you one more smile 

“Thank you my sweet (Name)..” 

“Of course, good night..”

Making your way out of his room, you look back at your father one last time before shutting the door

Grabbing your bag, you make your way outside, even if you couldn’t go into town at this hour, you still wanted to at least pick more herbs nearby

While the sun was still out, you hastily make your way to the field of rosemary's 

—--

A lone man strides through the forest, he was starved 

Both for meat and affection

He hadn’t had a successful satisfying kill in days, and quite frankly he was on the edge now, and the fact he was sexually frustrated would worsen his state of mind

Frustration and hunger was his drive, and whatever poor decently-sized creature was within a mile radius would meet an unfortunate end 

His ear and nose twitches

He knew this smell all too well, a potential prey 

Hastily, he makes his way toward the source of this delicious smell

The closer he got, the more his hunger enhanced 

Until, the smell of his prey mixed with the scent of rosemary 

He obscures himself behind a tree, waiting for the perfect moment

As soon as his prey got in better range of his sight, he could make out a figure, it was no deer, it was a human, a female human  

Peeking his head out more, his head tilts upon seeing the human

The werewolf has seen humans before, but never this close, nor this beautiful 

He stares at the woman's body, from her docile looking face, her breasts, and plump arse

Now that he thought about it, he was at the ripe age of finding a mate, after all most of his friends have already tied the knot and even had some mini versions of them!

And she certainly looked to be at a child-bearing age

He had to have her...

Upon noticing she was dusting herself off and ready to leave, he moved from his spot in a flash, steadily making way to his mate

HIs sudden movements startled as the woman gasps and looked around for the source of the sound

She was easily startled, cute....

Deciding to play with her for a little, he reveals himself to her, standing on his full height

—--

Your eyes widen at the tall figure in front of you, your breathing quickens and start to panic

"Well..what do we have here?" voice deep and menacing

Looking up, you're met with a rugged-looking man, he was tanned, with dark chestnut messy hair cascading down his shoulders. But what stuck out most to you was his amber eyes, bright under the moonlight, pupils piercing into you. He was far from human...those eyes no doubt belonged to those men who transform into monstrous beasts on the full moon

"Lost little lamb?"

"N-no, I was on my home just now...good night." before you could make a run for it, the tall man blocks your way, for a big guy, he was surprisingly agile, making your fear increase ten fold

"Not so fast, you've crossed into my territory, now you must pay the price."

Your heads suddenly turn toward him, since when did this field belong to anyone? You've been here many times, and there was never a claim on this field. "Sir, please! I have no possessions worth taking from me! I only have herbs for my sick father!"

"Ahh I see, so you're the one stealing from my field?"

"Please forgive me, I needed them to heal my father!"

"Save your pitiful pleas thief.." with a devilish smirk, the man lowers his upper body to inspect you

The man lowly chuckles at how adorably pathetic you looked, all under his mercy

"Hmm, quite plumply cheeks...meaty thighs..." he then pushes his face on the crook of your neck, inhaling your smell "Delectable...you would make a fine meal..." feeling you tense up and shiver with fear made his senses go wild

"But...lucky you, I've been lonely these days... I need something pretty to warm my den.." Hearing what he was implying, you look at the man with fear and confusion

"I'll take you as my mate...and you will bear my offspring." he licks his lips, revealing sharp canines

Your eyes widened in horror. You were in the prime of young adulthood and still had a life ahead of you! Marriage and children were still far away from your plans! "No, no, no! I have a father to look after, I can't and I won't!" pushing away from him, he grasps your wrist in an iron grip

"Oh well that's just too bad for that old fool, you trespassed and now you must pay up by giving yourself away to me, if you keep resisting I'll just have to eat you up and kill that meek father of yours."

Seeing all the spirit and will drain from you, made him swell with pride and triumph "Now what will be your choice, my mate?" he whispers and grabs a lock of your hair, kissing it

Fat glumps of tears build up in your waterline, this was it, your life was over all because of this hormonal and dangerous man beast

"Please...leave my father out of this..."

"Then you know what you must choose, pet.."

Closing your eyes, tears shed down your cheek and you nod "Just leave my father alone..."

The man grins, and grabs your chin, making make eye contact with him "Good choice...but don't you worry, I'll be your family now, along with all the children we will have." He slams his lips on yours, devouring them

You choke and gasp as he assaults your throat, his tongue forcing its way inside all over your mouth

Pulling away briefly, he lets out a raspy chortle. "That's it. Keep crying for me." he turns you around, throwing your bag out in the field to be forgetten. He pulls apart your dress, the tearing of the fabric was the only noise heard in the forest, your cries only worsens

"Erix." He suddenly says

You look at him with confusion

"Erix is my name, be sure to scream it."

With one final pull, your dress is in tethers, leaving you bare only in your underclothes

Erix's large palms pulls on the straps of your brassiere, leaving it to fall on the ground

Immediately, you cover yourself by wrapping your arms around your breasts

Behind you, you hear Erix taking off his trousers

"Tch, your weak struggling is only turning me on more..." With ease, Erix grabs your arms, pulling them away from your chest

As he slowly pushes you down on the grass, your crying starts to silence, quietly accepting your fate

"C'mon, sing for me, pretty.." one of Erix's textured-hands made their way on your breast fondling it, but you turn cold upon feeling something hot and hard rubbing on your ass

You let out a small gasp

"That's right, you'll start making noises again." He then grabs your underwear, pulling them down to your ankles, throwing them away. Erix's large hands grab the fat of your thighs, holding them up to spread your legs, and then grabs his long, hardened flesh, aligning it to your sweet entrance. With ease, he forces himself inside you

You were not prepared for the penetration. You've never experienced intercourse all your life, making the pain all but less painful. It didn't help that Erix's manhood was most likely much larger than an average human male. Your poor body bleeds and suffers from his harsh movements

The cries you suppressed earlier leak out again to a painful wailing

Helplessly, you lie on your side, continuously being pounded from behind

You hear Erix groaning louder and louder along with feeling his pace quickening, he then shifts up from his side to get on his knees and get more leverage and friction, both his hands grabbing the cheeks of your ass, slapping them making you cry uncontrollably

Your face is shoved on the grass. The push and pull was almost hurting your neck and hips. Then you felt it, a sudden feeling of warm fluid coursing inside you, slapping of skin to skin was the only sound heard along with carnal growls in the grassy field

As Erix's pace slows down, the moment you feared commenced, warm thick fluid enters your body, his seed. He keeps the lower half of you up in the air and doesn't pull out instead pushing his hips back and forth on yours to make sure you took it

He then turns you around. "Gotta make sure the job gets done right." This time, he rubs the remaining of his bodily fluids on your vagina, acting as a temporary lube, for your body still refuses to take in his length. Erix continues his violation on you, but this time, the pain lessened this round, and instead, you feel pleasure, turning your cries into moans. Finally, your pussy releases lube

While you watch with lidded eyes on the man fucking you, you get a good look at his naked body, hairy and toned. Damn you for finding him attractive, your eyes trail down to his cock disappearing and reappearing inside you, it was a miracle that you were taking him before you got wet

"Ahh...Erix..." you spoke his name for the first time and wrap your legs around his waist to feel every motion of his dick

"Hah.. you're coming around now, my flower, your body is taking mine in..." Erix firmly grips your hips and throws his head back, groaning each time his hips meet yours. You weren't even trying to match this pace anymore as he did all the work by using your body to his pleasure

He looks back down at you, face covered in dirt with such a erotic expression. He then looks at your bouncing tits, the beautiful mounds of flesh that would feed his children one day

The thought only turns him on more, and he speeds up, your eyes widen, and your moans get louder. Even though you still felt pleasure, Erix's brutal pace sent shocks of pains in your abdomen. The pain was enough for tears to form again. Your cries grab Erix's attention, and then you feel a wet and warm muscle on your cheek, Erix was licking your tears away

You once again feel the warmth from earlier inside you, but you are a fool to think he would stop here or the third time

Afterall, the night was still young. The forest and the stars above would bear witness to the savage violation of your body, the consummation of this twisted union

Hours upon hours passed of Erix's assault on your body, it had been long since you lost the will to fight back as it was useless against this beast who's blood was pulsing with sexual hormones and with the intention of impregnating you no matter what

Round after round, he never stopped, his stamina was endless. Until you finally feel him slowing his thrusting to a complete stop, you were dreading the moment he would start another harsh thrust inside you, but it never came

His slow and heavy breaths match yours, sweat was glistening off his body. Erix leans closer you, slightly pressing his weight on you. He then leaves gentle licks on your neck along with kisses while one of his hands grope one of your breasts gently fondling them

"Mine."

—--

It had been four months since Erix forced you to become his wife

As he planned, you fell pregnant with his child, he really had overdone himself that night, you still remembered the long cruel hours of him using your body as long as he pleased

Getting up from the bed, you've been craving raw meat these days, and Erix had just came back with a fresh kill

"Eat this, then our child will grow strong. It's in our tradition for expecting mothers to eat a deer's heart." Erix hands you a deer's heart, it grossed you out, yet the child inside you begged for it

Despite your child being a product of forced love, you couldn't bring yourself to hate the parasite growing inside you, the poor child had no control over who their parents were or how they were conceived. And so, you endured eating the heart for the sake of your baby

After finishing the heart with great difficulty, you clean yourself up and Erix places his hands on your now large waist

"Such a good mother you are, I knew you'd be the best woman to have my children."

Closing your eyes, you hold yourself from pushing Erix away and run away, you place your hands on your belly too but away from where Erix's hands were

While rubbing your belly, you think of your poor father, had he died? Had he recovered? But considering he was barely in good health while you were around, deep down it was most likely he had succumbed to his illness. The thought sent a tightness to your chest. 'I hope it's bright up there with mother...'

With a kiss on your temple, Erix pats your belly one last time before whispering in your ear "I'll be back, both of you take care." He then pulls away from you and makes his way out of the cottage

Emotionlessly, you waddle your way back to the bed

For being barely past your first trimester, your belly had grown so much already that you suspect your baby will be born earlier than human children. After all, the baby is half werewolf. They will most likely grow faster than the average human child as well.

Drowning in the furs on the bed, your hand mindlessly draws circles on your round belly, and you feel the baby kicking gently as if loving the attention they were receiving from their mother.

"You like that, don't you, little one? Your father did unspeakable things to me that led to your creation, but I will love you nonetheless." You smile fondly as your baby kicks again

Looking out the window of the cottage, the place had been a bit run-down when you first moved in, Erix made an effort to tidy up the place

"If you're a boy, I'm thinking of naming you after your grandpa. But if you're a girl, maybe your grandma? That's only if your father will let me have the naming rights." You chuckle to yourself, you will pull on Erix's ear if he doesn't let you name the child, especially since he's forcing you to have his children, he'd better let you name every child he puts in you

Sitting back up, you lean your back against the headboard, looking at your belly and wrapping your arms around it, the precious life you carry was your only source of joy in life now

While gazing out the window, the field of your front yard reminds of the same field you and mother would leisure in, perhaps you would spend time with your children there too. Then you remembered your mother's words, “One day you’ll meet that someone who gives you the butterflies and you’ll know they’re the one you’ll spend the rest of your life with.”, you close your eyes and take deep breaths

"Mother, he's the one."

He's the one who forced himself into your life

_____

Writing smut is fun wtf

Might make a pt 2 where Erix puts more babies in y/n and mayb fuck her in werewolf form 👀

I made the ending a bit fluffy and whether or not you wanna interpret Y/n having Stockholm syndrome it's up to you, but its good to note that she still resents Erix, but I rarely find fics where the reader genuinely cares for the baby, it's fair why they would resent the child but at the same time I feel bad for the kid 🫠🫠🫠

[dollyyun]

𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐥'𝐬 𝐤𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬' 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐲 | 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐬𝐢𝐱 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐫

RELEASE DATE: Wednesday, 26th June 2024

PAIRING: enha hyung line x fem!reader

GENRE: 18+ (mdni), semi-college au, adulthood, reverse harem, dark themes.

WARNINGS: mentions of christianity, profanities, smoking, mention of drugs, alcohol consumption, violence, blood, murders, yandere & tsundere, manipulation, corruption, toxicity, heavy angst, dubcon themes, unprotected sex (no!), dom hyung line (rip), name calling, degradation, possible voyeurism, mild bondage, gagging, choking, blowjob, fingering, edging, manhandling, spitting kink, orgasm denial, crying, squirting, creampies, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, threesomes (twice), more to be added....

TEASER WORD COUNT: 1.3k

PART 1, PART 2, PART 3.1, PART 3.2, PART 4, PART 5 ✘ SERIES MASTERLIST ✘

The passage of time appears to be slowing down, with the red neon luminosity encompassing you gradually fading into a blur, while the bright sign of 'exit' ahead remains a beacon to your fortitude, but your quest to the road of freedom grows languid as the eventual exertion dawns on your body.

Tears welling in your lower eyelids are a recrudescence of terror, parallel to your inner turmoil that remains unabating, and you feel as though it is eating you alive from the inside, dwindling the hope you so desperately clutch onto.

Your ears perk up at the sound of familiar, heavy-booted steps from not far behind you, eliciting a forlorn cry from you before you force your weary body to pick up the speed, despite the unknown yet lethal substance streaming through your every fibre and taking its major effect on your whole being.

No, this is not how you imagined facing your demise. You never would have thought that one of your worst nightmares had manifested itself and plunged into your reality.

Your skull is throbbing painfully, with blood seeping from the fresh wounds that trickle down the side of your face, while your heart aches tremendously. A sob emerges from the back of your throat before waterworks cascade down on you, but you refuse to allow yourself to die tonight, not when you’re nearly getting the taste of freedom.

Before you know it, you use the force of your body to push the door open as it swings outward violently, and you continue to run on the asphalt ground, having no clue of your current location, while your heaving chest is starting to hurt with how ragged your breathing is that mingles with the sobs.

“Please.” You choke out, your tearful eyes blurring your vision, while you feel as though more needles are piercing into your skull. “Please let all of this be a nightmare.” You manage to whisper in between broken sobs, nearly succumbing to the hyperventilation that renders you unfocused on your surroundings as your body remains in a fight-or-flight mode.

The next thing you know, you bump into a solid chest that nearly has you staggering back if it weren’t for strong arms latching onto your trembling form. The moment your eyes meet his concerned eyes that soon blaze with anger, a frightful shriek tears from your parched throat before you push him away from you, as though he is a disease.

“Princess?” Sunghoon, whose head is fogging with confusion, frowns visibly as he sees the way you are looking at him as though he is a terrifying stranger.

The movements from Jake and Jay catch your heightened sense, prompting you to cower away from them as you back away. “Stay away from me!” You shout at them, the fear is palpable in the tremor of your voice, to which they halt their movements.

“Baby, it’s us!” Jay exclaims while trying his utmost not to give away the tempest of wrath that storms within him upon seeing the state you are in. 

“Lovely…” Jake takes cautious steps towards you, but even his loving, gentle tone is not enough to dispel the betrayal and heartbreak you are still reeling from.

“I said don’t come close to me! Please!” To see you hyperventilating as you sob hard hits them in the face, but what pains them is the terror you exhibit right now because they never wanted you to fear them as though they would really hurt you.

You turn around with the intention to run from them, but this time, Heeseung’s figure is a hindrance as he blocks your way. His hands find their way to hold you firmly while you attempt to thrash and struggle in his captivity.

“Let go of me!” You become relentless, your fear is now eclipsed by anger that stems from the fresh betrayal.

Despite the confusion upon seeing the blazing anger in your crystalline eyes, Heeseung remains calmly collected as he holds you effortlessly yet is unable for you to escape from. “Sweetheart─”

Being utterly overwhelmed and blinded by the maelstrom of pain, betrayal, sadness, and anger, you raise your hand and bring it down to land a harsh slap to his now-stinging cheek, shocking the other three from behind.

“Do you think this is meant to be humorous to you?!” The rage in your voice is unmistakable as it sounds foreign to your ears, but your focus remains on his face as he slowly turns to look at you while you are oblivious to the raging storms in his dark eyes. “Is this really your endgame?! Once you’re satisfied after fucking me, you'll kill me?!”

Heeseung’s deadly silence only seems to fuel your wrath, and so you begin to throw punches into his chest that don't even have any effect on him. “Fight back!” You scream in between sobs, tears relentlessly streaming down your cheeks. “If you want to kill me, do it now!”

“Y/N, stop.” Jake and Jay appear from behind, intervening as they grab you away from Heeseung’s defeated grasps while you continue to struggle and fight against their strong hold valiantly despite feeling debilitated.

“What are you talking about?” Heeseung’s calm voice manages to reach your ears despite the sound of your hysteria.

“Yeah, what do you mean by killing you, lovely?” Jake asks with a frown as soon as you shoot him a glare. “We would never do such a thing─”

Miraculously, you manage to escape from their grasps, and your glaring eyes penetrate into each of them. “Don’t lie to me! I know you’re the ones who kidnapped me and brought me to this God-forsaken place, and for what? To kill me!”

“We didn’t!” Jay objects vehemently, disbelief lacing his tone. “Why would we ever want to kill you?”

“Liar!” You retort before breaking down again, the sound of your cries only fuels their anger to hunt down whoever dared to hurt you. “If you weren’t the ones back there, then how did you even know where I was?”

“I installed a tracker on your phone. It’s the reason why we managed to track your location.” Jake steps forward, his softening eyes seem to balm your hysteric nerves. “But you have to believe us, love. We would never do anything to jeopardise your life.”

You open your mouth to speak, but a whimper comes instead as you feel the familiar pain plummeting into your skull, prompting you to clutch your still-bleeding head, and Sunghoon, being the nearest to you, holds you steady against him just as your body sways lightly.

“You’re still bleeding, princess.” Sunghoon murmurs, his gentle tone and his touch send you into a whirlwind of confusion. Disappointment seeps through him as you push him away while your mind is waging a battle of internal conflict, recalling the girls’ words about them, but at the same time, your love for them remains palpable, which only makes your head spin.

“Don’t touch me.” You protest weakly as you attempt to yank your arm from Heeseung’s firm grasp, but the substances injected into you that flow in your system wholly revoke the remnants of your vitality, rendering you debilitated as you find yourself leaning into him.

Without a word, Heeseung effortlessly carries you in a bridal style, with your whole body going limp as your consciousness slips away faster than you like before the darkness welcomes you once more.

“Gather all the knights from your respective houses. We’ll be having a meeting tomorrow morning.” Heeseung orders calmly, causing the three to exchange glances. “All of them, and not a single person is to be left out.”

“You got it.” Jake gives him a firm nod.

Heeseung catches Sunghoon and Jay’s eyes, and they immediately understand his deadly intent. “Find those fuckers inside and do what you need to do. Bring their heads to me.”

[flowerandblood]

The Fall from the Heavens (39)

[ canon • Aemond x Strong • niece female ]

[ warnings: description of character death, childbirth, anxiety, sex content, smut, angst, breeding kink ]

[ description: A cool distance turns into friendship and more when two children see that they can find refuge and understanding in each other. However, naïve dreams collide with the reality in which every event has consequences and what once could have been love becomes a dark, newly painful obsession. Angst, sexual tension, obsession, violence, madness, very dark Aemond. ]

The story in this series is an alternate reality from the oneshot Stay and love, leave and die, in which Aemond reads the letters his niece has sent to him over the years. They are the same characters and it shows what would have happened between them − I have changed the background story from their childhood slightly for the sake of the plot.

Characters & Series Moodboard Lady Strong Moodboard Aemond & Lady Strong Moodboard Aemond & Lady Strong Childhood

* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *

Next chapters: Masterlist

_____

What he had done and the death of his grandfather, although it filled him with sadness, eased the tension between Dragonstone and the Red Keep to some extent. Something of a ceasefire was to last until his wife gave birth to his child.

He was horrified at how much depended on this.

To his despair, Harrenhal, although in his mind it was supposed to be a place of their solace and rest, had become a neutral fortress, with members of both the Black and Green factions arriving there.

Neither Daemon nor his mother had any intention of leaving until the matter was resolved once and for all, but they did not say so out loud. Daemon focused on searching for Larys Strong and burning nearby villages, while his mother tried to support his wife through the hardships of expecting his offspring.

Her lower abdomen swelled from his inheritance more and more each day, her breasts grew fuller, her hips wider.

Before his eyes she was changing, becoming even more feminine.

Although the maester's indications were different, in the privacy of his chamber they made love to each other, unable to maintain restraint in this aspect.

He did not dare to be aggressive or violent towards her, treating her body as if it were a temple; his fingers, as he pressed his naked body against her back, lying on his side with her, made sure that she would be all wet and moist before he put his erection, aching with desire, into her.

Once he was sure her body would accept him with ease, he lifted her soft thigh gently, allowing her hand to direct the head of his cock into her slit. His free hand clamped down on her full, plump, soft breast as with a slow, unhurried thrust he opened her lazily on his swollen length, moaning with her in delight.

"– yes –" She breathed out, clasping her hands on his arms that embraced her, rocking her hips, trying to find a rhythm with him and force him to accelerate.

"– no, sweet girl – we're only going to tease this little cunt – we can't hurt the baby –" He whispered in her ear, placing sticky, hot kisses on her neck and shoulders, leaving wet marks behind as his hard manhood opened her slick, fleshy walls again and again with the soft, deep stabs of his hips.

She shook her head, her breath heavy at the thought that he might take it out of her when it felt so good, when he was filling her insides so wonderfully again, thirsting for his closeness.

"– please – please, husband, inside me –" She mumbled out, tilting her head back with a sigh of euphoria as his thumb pressed hard on her puffy nipple, teasing it between his fingers. Her core clenched greedily on his erection, sucking it in, making him involuntarily speed up.

"– fuck –" He exhaled, feeling his will to slide out of her move away from him with each faster, sharper thrust. He gave up when he heard the loud clicks of her wetness as he began to pound into her with all his strength, panting hard along with her, chasing his fulfilment.

"– is this what you want? – you're carrying my baby, and you already want another? – hm? –" He hissed, driving his fingers into her wonderfully soft, hot breast. She squirmed at his words, grabbing his hair from behind, responding with movements of her hips to his thrusts, soaking his cock wet.

"– yes –" She mumbled out, already thinking with her weeping cunt rather than her sober mind.

"– fucking beg – beg your uncle –" He growled, tightening his hand around her neck, careful not to overdo it though. She moaned loudly, her leaking, hot walls giving his throbbing erection a thirsty, quick squeeze.

"– please – p-please, uncle, oh gods – oh gods, oh gods –" She babbled as he felt her wetness run down her thighs with her fulfilment, his hand stroking her swollen abdomen before he sighed heavily in relief, his warm spend filling her insides again.

"– Rhaenys –" He muttered, letting go of her neck, snuggling her back into him, placing loud, hot kisses on her neck. He felt her jump up suddenly, excited, and she grabbed his hand quickly, placing it on her stomach.

"– can you feel it, uncle? – here –" She gasped, and indeed, he seemed to feel movement under her skin, and then again and again.

He blinked, breathing loudly through his mouth, and smiled involuntarily, feeling warmth in his heart at the thought that their child lived deep inside her, safe and sound.

Their little dragon.

"– yes – yes, I can feel it –" He whispered, pressing his cheek against hers, looking at their entwined hands.

"– our child has sensed our excitement –" She said with amusement, and he hummed at her words, placing a lazy, soft kiss on her shoulder.

With each week, the baby in her womb made her more and more uncomfortable – her ankles swelled from even a short walk, she was dying once from the heat and once from the cold.

He felt helpless knowing that everything she was experiencing was on her shoulders, and there was nothing he could do to relieve her even for a moment.

As her husband, he made sure that every evening there was a tub of warm or cold water waiting for her, depending on her mood, sitting by her side and stroking her hair as she lay in the bath with her eyes closed, trying to relax. Before bed, he massaged her back, calves and feet, wanting to ease her pain a little.

"– ah! –" She hissed, trying to get away from his knuckles that were digging into her spine. "– not so hard! – it hurts –"

"– I have to do it hard – otherwise it won't have any effect –" He replied, pulling her back to him, putting as much force into his massage as he saw fit. She quivered in his embrace, begging him to stop, and when he finally finished, she sighed in relief as she felt the tension leave her muscles.

"– better? –" He asked, and she nodded wordlessly.

The only comfortable sleeping position for her was lying on her side, so he embraced her from behind, wrapping his arms around her and their child.

Although the presence of her father and brother, as well as his mother, drove him mad, on the other hand, he felt safer because of them, knowing that he was not watching over their safety alone.

A few months earlier he had not believed it possible, but he and his niece were once again conversing with each other as they had when they were children: frankly and directly, sometimes leading to arguments and anger which, however, quickly passed and they fell asleep each evening in a tender embrace.

The knowledge that he shared everything he was experiencing with her, the weight of the future, the weight of his inheritance, the weight of the crown made him have the strength to bear it.

He could finally see a meaning in it all, as if at last the gods had revealed to him the purpose of his life.

The being growing in her womb fascinated him more and more – he could lie for hours with his cheek nestled against her belly swollen from his heritage, kissing her warm skin, her fingers playing with strands of his hair.

The thing that excited him most was the fact that his baby moved often or kicked hearing his voice.

"You don't let your mother sleep at night. You squirm terribly." He murmured and smiled involuntarily when he felt the little creature twist inside her.

Increasingly, he wondered, had his father cuddled in this way with his mother's body when she carried him under her heart? Or did that honour accrue only to Aemma?

He felt a cold sweat on his back thinking about his wife's grandmother and what had happened to her.

He promised himself that he would save his niece's life even if it meant the death of his child.

He preferred to live through his grief and beget another than lose her again.

Daemon, unable to bear being in the same fortress with his mother, gave himself completely to the search for Lord Strong and, to everyone's surprise, he found him where no one expected him to be: in King's Landing.

He didn't know who had reported this to his uncle, but he assumed that the women in the brothels were his eyes and ears: he had received word that Larys Strong was hiding in one of the ports and wanted to get out of Westeros by ship in one of the empty wine barrels, to disappear forever in Essos and never be found.

Daemon was quicker, and although his original plan was different, he liked the vision of having his head impaled on a spike. The rest of his body was thrown into the river, while he took the part from the neck upwards with him only to throw it under his wife's feet.

"He lived like a rat and died like a rat." He said.

Then, to her despair, he ordered his head to be stuck on a spike above the walls of Harrenhal to welcome all comers, warning them to know what would befall those who threatened his children.

Although he felt regret and shame that he was not the one who had caught him, he was immensely relieved to know that everything had returned to some point from which their family could begin again.

He didn't believe he could ever forgive Luke and didn't want to see him: all he wanted was for him to rule in Driftmark, beget his bastard children and not appear before his face.

The thought of Jace inheriting Dragonstone filled him with frustration, however, he knew that this compromise for everyone was bittersweet, and he had to swallow his deep sip in silence.

What he had written to her about in his letter had come true.

Each of them had to sacrifice something.

What bothered him was that the closer it got to the childbirth, the more his wife became silent and thoughtful, closing herself off in her mind.

He knew this was not a good sign.

"What are you thinking about?" He asked sitting down next to her on the bed, pulling her out of her reverie. She blinked and shook her head, stroking her swollen lower abdomen.

"About nothing." She whispered.

"I want to know." He said impatiently, and she sighed heavily. She pressed her lips together, as if she was embarrassed by what she was about to say.

"My body will never be the same again after… after this." She confessed, and he blinked, completely not understanding what she meant.

"I do not follow."

She closed her eyes, impatient and distraught, tightening her fingers on her nightgown.

"My body after I give birth. My stomach, my thighs, my breasts. They will never be the same again. I'll probably have scars, my skin won't be as firm, it will be…"

"Do you really want to speak with me about scars? About irreversible changes?" He asked roughly, and she lowered her head, her eyes red from tears of shame.

"I told you it was nothing." She muttered in a trembling voice, not looking at him.

He pressed his lips together, feeling a discomfort in his stomach, knowing that he had reacted inappropriately and this was not what he meant. He sighed, considering for a moment whether or not to do it, and then decided it was the only way.

He reached into his left eye and grasped the sapphire that had been inserted into his eye socket, then took it out, for the first time in the presence of another person.

He turned his face towards her, but her gaze was fixed on her hands.

"Look at me." He said softly.

She lifted her eyes to his and froze, surprised, her lips parted involuntarily.

"– Aemond –"

"– do you consider me disgusting? – unworthy of your love? – would you betray me and my trust by what you now see before you? –" He asked, and she shook her head quickly, her breath heavy.

"– no – no, of course not, my love – I –"

"– do you think I'm looking at every part of your body making sure it doesn't change? – that I believe that though I grow old, you will be forever young? – do you count the scars I have on my body? – do you pay attention to them, think about them when you make love to me? –" He continued to ask, tears one after another running down her cheeks. She looked at him pleadingly, shaking her head.

"– no –" She mumbled out with difficulty.

"– so why do you judge me so unfairly? – because I am a man and you are a woman? – you think you're beautiful because you're young? – you're beautiful because you're mine – because you smile at the sight of me, because your bare body is warm and moist for me, because your breasts and hips are soft when I dig my fingers into them –" He whispered, placing his hand on her knee, sliding it down to her thigh.

She looked at him with big eyes in silence, quivering, listening to him in complete silence, wiping her tears from her face flushed with emotion.

"– those are beautiful words – you moved me deeply –"

"– I love you –" He said without thinking and nodded his head as if admitting to himself that he was right. "– as you put it – it's not love like in poems – it's something painfully real –"

Although he thought they still had a few more days, the delivery took them by surprise, and his wife simply collapsed one morning as her servants were helping her dress, a loud, surprised moan leaving her lips.

"– Aemond – Aemond, g-gods, it has begun –" She cried.

He called Alys, his mother and the servants to help her immediately, not knowing what he was supposed to do himself, her face flooded with tears, the terror in her eyes that made him helpless.

She was suffering, and he could not help her.

"– leave, my Prince –" Alys ordered, and he nodded, watching her with a look of defiance.

"– she is to survive –"

The Witch of Harrenhal grinned, understanding what he meant.

As in his dream, he, Daemon and Jace were left alone in the other chamber that belonged to him, adjacent to the one where his wife lay. He covered his face with his hands, hearing her cries clearly, her screams and moans, feeling himself tremble all over, his heart in his throat.

His niece tried to bring his offspring into the world in pain, suffering for him and his cause, and he could only sit and wait.

"– childbirth – a nightmare for wives and husbands – drink, nephew –" Daemon said in a bored, tired voice, himself visibly tense, handing him a cup of wine, which he did not, however, take from him. His uncle laughed under his breath.

"– you are as stubborn as your mother –"

He did not answer, staring dully ahead.

He was afraid, hearing her whines, that his dream would become reality, and the thought that he might lose her once again made him feel a terrifying emptiness in his mind.

He frowned when the sounds suddenly stopped, involuntarily glancing at Daemon. He was horrified to see that his uncle had also turned pale, looking towards the door, knowing that this was either a very good or very bad sign.

"What's happening?" He muttered finally, feeling like he was about to explode.

"Don't panic." Daemon answered him, licking his lower lip quickly.

Everyone jumped in their seats as the door to the chamber opened suddenly – his mother stepped inside, and they all stood up, pale and terrified.

The Queen smiled.

"You have a son."

"And her?"

"She is well. You can see her."

He rushed out of the chamber, panting heavily, and opened the door to the quarters where his wife lay. He only breathed a sigh of relief when he saw her face – she was all red and sweaty, her cheeks swollen from tears of exertion and emotion, strands of her beautiful dark hair stuck to her face.

She smiled at the sight of him in a way from which he felt like crying, only after a moment noticing the small creature wrapped in a white cloth writhing in her embrace.

He walked closer to them, feeling himself quivering all over, sitting down on the bed beside her, looking in disbelief at his inheritance, their shared effort, their shared hope.

"He has your beautiful hair. Your mother is pleased." She said, exhausted and amused. He embraced her and pressed her to his chest, kissing her fragrant hair with tenderness again and again, not knowing how else he would show her what he felt.

The fact that they had a son pleased him, but the real relief for him was that she had endured the labour so well.

He swallowed loudly and only then did he look more carefully at his son, touching his fingertips to his hand, which had clenched into a fist on his finger.

"– see? – he recognises his father –" She murmured softly, rocking the white-haired infant before placing a soft, warm kiss on its small forehead. Their son squirmed and yawned, opening his eyelids for a moment.

He felt hot at the thought that his son had her eyes.

"– what shall we name him? –" His wife asked, snapping him out of his reverie, laying her head on his shoulder. He mused for a moment, stroking her neck.

"– Viserys – as the man who betrothed us –"

[legobiwan]

So I find it a little odd that Mario shakes his brother's hand like he's trying to win political office rather than having just been rescued (again) from one of King Boo's paintings at the end of Luigi's Mansion: Dark Moon.

But then I was thinking - this might be a kind of instinctual response.

From what we can gather over the three games, being stuck in a painting isn't a passive experience, but one that is disturbing, disorientating, and mostly likely tantamount to torture.

And given King Boo's abilities, who knows what kind of environment he has dropped his victims into with these settings. The landscapes, you might say. There's no definite background in any of the trapped paintings, ghost or otherwise, but it does beg the question of what can be felt, seen, heard, or otherwise perceived by someone who is trapped in a portrait. Does the hunter create the cage, enrichment area and all, or are the trappings beyond the frame (inside the frame) more akin to being trapped within one's mind and all the pitfalls that could emerge from that?

We see three iterations of Mario being freed from the painting in each game. The first being total confusion and possible injury; the second looking like some kind of hallucination, given Luigi's concerned expression; and the third being a form of decorporalization (not a real word, but whatever), as Mario seems shocked to learn he has a body again.

The first might be attributed to King Boo's insistence of straight-up physical torture combined with E. Gadd's more medieval equipment, which had likely been less-than-tested in extracting someone from a portrait. (And if the de-portraiting process was that bad, imagine what it was like for the ghosts going in. No wonder they held a grudge. I love E. Gadd, but oh boi, is he the pinnacle morally ambiguous mad scientist).

Anyway, in the third installment, Mario definitely shows signs of having been disconnected from his physical form, perhaps meaning that his time inside the portrait reduced him to a neutered, mental representation of himself, incapable of fighting back in the real world. But this being said, he seems to recognize Luigi on-site, rushing forward to give him an enthusiastic hug, which is the reaction you'd expect after being freed from a pair of diabolical ghosts, one of whom is trying to thirst-trap the other through psychological torture.

So what's the deal with Mario's reaction in Dark Moon?

My guess is that King Boo trapped Mario in a painting that was a distorted reality, or perhaps a distorted version of Mario's own insecurities. It would account for the disorientation and the fact Mario comes out of the painting gladhanding his own brother like a stranger. (Which would also account for Luigi's concerned reaction - what the hell is my brother doing?)

And you figure, Mario, at this point, is a kind of figurehead, an idol, a hero of the Mushroom Kingdom. It's become his identity, it's who he is, it's what he does and is known for. Of course, part of this role is going around and shaking hands, being present - at least physically - at press conferences and speeches and all the like. The people need a focal point, a representation of their hopes against the violent and numerous incursions upon their land they suffer from outside forces (although in complete transparency, my personal headcanon is that Bowser's kingdom used to be comprised of at least a part of the Mushroom Kingdom, and that that land and sovereignty was stolen through a series of bad treaties by his father and some of the more malicious factions of the Toad Council, thus leading to both the enmity between the kingdoms and some serious economic and trade repercussions in the Darklands, but that's a whole other post.)

Mario must be so used to blindly shaking hands and putting up that front, that character, so much so that he doesn't even think about it anymore, and it's my theory that this is the version of Mario that emerges from the portrait in Dark Moon, perhaps having been wrested from some situation where this almost desperate attempt at approval was manifesting from Mario's own subconscious.

And poor Luigi. You have to wonder if one of his latent fears is becoming another empty face in the adoring crowd surrounding his brother. The Mario that emerges is not 100% connected to the fact he is Luigi's brother, it seems, is just putting on airs and the right words and actions as he may have been trained to do by the Toad Council. (Who, incidentally, are one of my favorite scapegoats in the series). Talk about a nightmare come to life.

It fits, in a way. Mario's first abduction results in physical harm, his second in mental, his third in more of a depersonalization - perhaps a rushed spell enacted by King Boo as he was, by the time of the whole hotel debacle, was far more preoccupied with his idea of trapping Luigi than enacting harm on anyone else beyond imprisonment. Because by the time Luigi's Manion 3 rolls around, King Boo is almost deranged in his obsession with Luigi, and I wouldn't be shocked if his non-existent heart wasn't into the nastier sides of portrait capture when it came to Luigi's friends and family. But oh boi, if he had captured Luigi in one of those paintings - good night, nurse.

[mayhem-neverending]

Nightmares

Gojo Satoru x Reader

Word Count: 2,213

Summary: Short fic about Gojo seeking you out after a nightmare. Friends to lovers.

Warnings: some violent graphic content

Note: This is my first time writing Gojo (on Tumblr - I'm very slowly working on a long fic on AO3). This came to me last night, and I thought it was a nice enough idea to write it. I know I'm a Naruto girly on here, but nothing wrong with expanding horizons, right?

Moonlight shone through the crack in your thick curtains, illuminating your deeply slumbering form. The room was still; the night was cool enough to leave the a/c off without turning on the heater. The only airflow came from the slight crack in your window. You were perfectly still, slow, deep inhales displayed in the gentle rising and falling of your chest. Your phone repeatedly vibrated on the other side of the bed, but it didn’t alert you in the slightest. Not even a twitch of your fingers to acknowledge the disturbance.

There was a low whirr that sounded in the middle of your room followed by shallow, erratic breaths. Soft, quick footsteps to the edge of your bed, the rustle of fabric, breath desperately trying and failing to be controlled. Fingers trembling in front of your face, a weak attempt to determine whether breath entered and exited your nose, but they were too out of it to tell. 

A harsh whisper of your name exited their mouth, and when you didn’t answer, a louder, broken call of your name dragged out next to your ear. 

You jostled awake, eyes shooting open and a sharp inhale as you scooted away from the voice. You were jumbled, your heart racing as you tried to compute what you were seeing. Your name fell from their lips again, a mix of desperation and relief, as your eyes finally met theirs. 

The faint glow of blue eyes in the darkness brought you back to reality. “Satoru?”

He looked wild and so vulnerable. He was only in a white t-shirt and boxers, hair wild from tossing in his sleep and blue eyes rimmed with red as fat tears poured from them. His shoulders shook as a sob broke from his lips. His hand landed on the bed next to you to steady his weight. 

“Satoru, what happened?” you asked, panic rising in your throat. He had never just appeared in your room before, and never in the middle of the night.

He shook his head, unable to speak. You threw the blankets off of you, instinctively coming up on your knees to bring your face to his. You inspected him with your eyes, looking for any injuries, but all you could find was his far away look. Whatever had happened, he still wasn’t quite with you. 

You took his face in your palm, thumb swiping at the unending flow of tears under his eye. He was shaking violently, you noticed. With your free hand you found his and entangled your fingers together, squeezing in the hope to ground him as your heart raced. He was looking into your eyes now, and you intentionally slowed your breathing, hoping to calm him enough for him to talk to you. 

Another sob escaped his throat and his weight collapsed against you. You barely saved the two of you from falling, having to use more strength than you wanted to admit to hold him. You softly shushed him, the hand on his face going to the back of his head and running fingers through his fluffy hair. 

“Come here,” you whispered. 

You readjusted your legs and helped him climb onto the bed, leaning back so that he could lay with his head on your chest. He curled his lanky body around you, touching you with every part of him he could and caging you in his tight grip. His long fingers dug into the flesh of your side, right beneath your ribs as he adjusted himself to lay his ear directly over your heart. 

You continued your ministrations to his hair; concern rising like bile in your throat. Feeling his tears pool on your shirt, you counted to your breaths in your head to keep yourself calm. In for four, hold for four, out for six. You repeated this action several times until your heart began to slow.

“What’s wrong?” you asked again as tenderly as you could muster. 

Satoru tilted his head to look up at you, the tears slowing but the far away look still clouding the edges of his expression. “It was- it was so vivid,” he choked. A dream, you realized with relief. He had a bad dream. 

“You can tell me about it if you want,” you wiped another tear from his eye. 

He sniffled and his fingers dug further into your skin. It was starting to hurt with how tightly he was holding you.

“You-” he shuddered. 

You patiently watched on, softening the muscles of your face and letting his eyes search yours. “Maybe I’m still in the dream,” he whispered to himself. 

His face scrunched in despair, a fresh wave of tears spilling from his beautiful crystal blue eyes. “Maybe they really did murder you, and I’m just dreaming you’re okay,” 

His breathing picked up and your eyes widened. He was having this visceral reaction over a dream where you were killed? He curled in on himself again, sobs wracking his body. It must have been a brutal nightmare for him to still be confusing reality. 

“Satoru,” your voice came out gentle but firm, hoping to reach him amid the sobs. 

He just barely moved his head to peek up at you with his now swollen eyes. Your heart broke for him. “I’m right here, I’m alive. You aren’t dreaming anymore,”

“You’re really here?” he asked into your chest, still unconvinced. 

The dream he had was horrendous. It started with you lovingly kissing him goodbye as you went grocery shopping, and giggling when he pulled you back in for a series of kisses all over your face. Then, he was somehow at the school, sprinting down the never ending corridor in a loop as he listened to you scream and beg for mercy. By the time he finally wrenched the door open, everything was silent. 

Your mutilated, barely recognizable corpse lay on the floor, limbs spread out and at odd angles. He dropped down beside you in the massive pool of your still warm blood. It was everywhere, still seeping from the wounds and bruises that littered your body. He saw everything with his six eyes. Everything that they had inflicted upon your innocent self. 

“I’m right here, sweetheart. What did you see?” you tilted his chin so that he was fully looking at your face. 

“They tortured you, I-” his tongue was heavy in his mouth, unable to form another word. 

Your hand gripped the one that was leaving bruises in your side. Lifting it up, you asked, “Where?”

“Where?” his voice came out strangled. 

He watched as you brought his hand up to your face. “Where? Did they hurt my face?”

He nodded slowly. You pressed his fingertips against the soft skin of your cheek. “Nothing here, see? No cuts or bruises,”

His breath hitched. “Where else, Satoru?”

He traced lower, stopping at the base of your throat, right above the collar of your shirt, ghosting along where the image of a large gash had been. He trailed lower, the hole in the middle of your chest fresh in his mind. He laid his hand flat over the spot on top of your shirt, but it didn’t help, he could still clearly imagine the way it would cave in under his hand. 

Wordlessly, you took his hand and guided it beneath your shirt, directly where his hand had been. He let out a small, relieved sigh at your soft skin and sturdy sternum beneath his fingers. He trailed lower, on his own accord, to feel across your abdomen, silently searching for the bruises and stab wounds he had so vividly witnessed. There was nothing there but smooth skin and soft flesh. He blinked hard, his senses fully returning to him now that he knew you were okay. 

He shuddered, laying his palm flat against your stomach as the last dredges of the dream washed over him and away. He looked up and met your attentive eyes, becoming acutely aware of himself. Aware of his hand on your bare skin, the wet spot on your shirt where his tears and spit collected. You watched his body coiled tightly around you, the tired tenderness you bore for him. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I don’t know what came over me,” 

He uncurled himself and sat up, removing his hand from your stomach, looking away from you. You took his other hand in yours. “Don’t apologize,”

He was exhausted from the sobbing, the dream, and the adrenaline crash that now sagged his shoulders. You continued, a raw edge to your voice “I’m glad to know that I’m important to you,”

His head whipped back to meet your eyes, his own widened in shock. No belittlement, no judgment, no mockery of The Strongest crying like a baby over a bad dream. His mouth opened and closed. He decided on, “Of course you’re important to me,”

More than he cared to let you know.

“Why are you sitting up? Come lay back down with me,” you tugged gently on his hand. 

“You’re not kicking me out after all that?”

Your brows scrunched together. “Of course not, you’re important to me, too, you know,”

He shifted, eyes cast downward. “But aren’t you bothered?”

“By what?”

He struggled to verbalize what he was feeling. He always did when it came to real emotions. When he finally spoke, he tried to say it jokingly, but he couldn’t quite reflect it in his tone. “Oh, you know, Gojo Satoru, The Strongest, blubbering like a baby in the middle of the night over a dream,”

You sighed out and he tensed, ready to face what he knew was coming, fingers twitching as he awaited you to kick him out. “Even if you’re the strongest person on earth, you’re still just a person. Just Satoru,”

You sat up and took his face in yours, forcing him to look at you. The ‘but’ he was about to say died on his lips. He held his breath as you pressed a kiss on his cheeks, lips wettening with the tracks of tears that remained. He could have cried again at the way you handled him so purposefully, not like a tool to be used but something precious to be preserved. 

The breath he was holding puffed out against his lips as you pulled away. You pushed his hair away from his eyes. He felt each of your touches linger against his skin. Why did you do this to him? Make him so weak?

You exhaled through your nose with humor, and he realized with utter mortification that he had said that out loud. Like he hadn’t embarrassed himself enough already. You hummed and cupped his cheek. 

Your eyes were bright and full of sincerity. He felt himself get lost in them, in the calm waves of emotion. He had never met someone as honest as you, who always knew what to say to him without himself knowing what he needed, or buttering him up. He loved that about you. He loved a lot of things about you. In fact, his nightmare reinforced the fact that he needed you and he didn’t know what to do about it. It terrified him more than any curse ever could. 

“I love you,” you said simply, the phrase easily slipping from your lips as if you’d said it a hundred times.

It took him a moment to register that your mouth had moved with how enraptured he was in your eyes. And then he heard it, repeating in his mind like a prayer to a melody. He inhaled sharply, eyes suddenly fervently searching yours. Did you mean that as a friend, or as a lover?

“You love me?”

You found his hand and squeezed his fingers between your own. “I do, I love you. You don’t need to say anything, I just wanted you to know, especially after that dream you had,”

You pulled your fingers from his grasp. “I’d like it if you stayed, but you’re free to leave if you want. I won’t be upset,”

His mouth was agape, illuminated blue eyes drinking you in. His heart beat unsteadily. “As-as a friend? Or-?” he couldn’t bring himself to finish the sentence. This night was bringing out all of his vulnerabilities and laying them out for you on a platter. 

You suddenly looked at him a little shyly, tucking your chin down for a moment before taking a breath to respond. “Or,”

Satoru laughed breathlessly, a grin splitting his tear stained face. He launched himself at you, suddenly uninhibited, and knocked you back against your pillows. He pressed wet kisses all over your face to which you couldn’t stop yourself giggling at. He hovered just above your lips until your giggles had just subsided, and kissed you. Once, twice, and then you got a hold of him, fingers scraping against his undercut as you slowly pressed your lips to his, moving them against his own. It was slow, a push and pull without hurry. 

“I love you,” he whispered against your mouth as you broke the kiss. He dove back in, the same sensual pace as your hands moved to explore each other. 

You pulled apart and he breathlessly repeated, “I love you, I love you, I love you,”

“Fuck, I love you,”

[amymbona]

I need to be Tashi's long forgotten girlfriend that's not so forgotten. A girl that she used to date in Stanford after she broke up with Patrick and hurt her knee, before she married Art. A girl that had nothing to do with tennis, studied arts and always kept a notebook and a pen in her pocket.

A little lady who was such a sweet, soft thing for Tashi, never once raising her voice at her, docile and gentle, but also very indifferent to the world around her. Locked in her own tiny reality that she only allowed Tashi to be a part of. Tashi had found a completely new world with her, full of nothing but love and tenderness, no fake feelings or overexaggerated pity. Just a little bubble of two girls that make bracelets together and hold each other while falling asleep.

She hasn't seen you after Stanford, actually unsure why. You must have changed your phone number and moved states, perhaps you moved to the very other side of the world, for all she knows. But even now, years later, she can't help herself and think about you when Art is eating her pussy like a good lap dog. She taught you how to do that as well, and you used to be the most shy and tender little thing, afraid to suck too hard or stick your tongue too far, too afraid you would cause her any pain. That's why she's constantly pushing Art further, literally begging him to be violent with her. To bite and claw and suck and pull just so she could remember the warm softness of your plush lips.

You were such an ethereal being, perhaps too unreal. Perhaps you were just a fragment of her imagination, something she made up to help overcome the grief surrounding her injury and the loss of her boyfriend. The gentleness that she had received from you was such a gift. Nobody has treated her the way you did until you disappeared. Perhaps people were right. Perhaps Tashi is an awful human who doesn't deserve a single good thing in her life.

Years later, she meets Patrick in New Rochelle, bumping into him in the hotel lobby. The two bicker for a while, unable to act like two adults, until she notices a gold shining thing on the finger of his left hand. With a smirk so sharp that could slice her throat, he admits to have married a wonderful fairy, sweet little thing. That night, after her husband admits to wanting to retire, she irrationally threatens to leave him if he loses against Patrick in the next day's match. But feeling too guilty, unable to possibly divorce her lover, she goes to sleep with Patrick in exchange for his next day's loss.

Her whole world crumbles into smithereens when she sees Patrick stroll towards the court, hand in hand with a familiar, beautiful face. She's raging, absolutely livid, unable to believe that such an ugly ass man has married the most precious, delicate human to ever walk on this Earth. You haven't changed a bit, at least not overall. Your hair is a bit longer than she rememebers it and your lips are painted an unusual shade of red, too dark for your complexion. But the hearts in your eyes, now directed at Patrick, they still shine the same way that they used to when you glanced at her.

She basically runs towards the locker rooms, hoping not to bump into you, and there she quite literally gets on her knees and begs Patrick to win. Promises that she will buy him whatever he asks for, promises to let Art be his because she knows that Patrick has always loved Art and Tashi has always loved you. She cries too, allowing Patrick to laugh at her and make her look like a fool. At that point, she's absolutely pathetic, completely desperate for her sweet love, and she'd even let Patrick publically humiliate her if it meant you'd be the one wiping her tears away in the end.

It's always easier to win than to lose, so it's no surprise when Patrick completely demolishes Art. He leaves the blonde boy literally sobbing and the craddles him in his arms, promising that everything is going to be okay, that he'll take care of him after he retires. But is Tashi happy? She's unsure. You left her, after all, made a ghost of her presence. So for the first time in her life, she feels like a complete failure, hurriedly shuffling towards your and Patrick's hotel room, knowing your husband is too busy with her own.

You open the door with a soft smile, looking like an absolute goddess and greeting her like an old friend. As if nothing this absurd has happened ever before, you let her in and kiss her forehead. Tashi basically falls into your arms and holds onto you as if you're a dream that's going to disappear. She breathes in the gentle smell of your body and floats in the warmth of your skin. You're real, her sweet girl. You're real, holding her and calling her yours.

[dancingbirdie]

hi! can I request Astarion x Tav where Tav is crying (same innocent type Tav from your last fic) and Astarion has to comfort them? (like after his confession scene in act 2 but before his final quest please?) tysm for your time!

Ask and you shall receive, my dear anon! Although a word of warning: this fic has a lot of fluff and a whole lot of angst. Also damn I really explored some of my own shit in this fic and am feeling very vulnerable but also very good. PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO THE WARNINGS/TAGS BEFORE READING <3

If I could nominate a song that inspired this writing, it would be "When The Lights Go Out" by Gabrielle Aplin.

The Dark Sun

Word Count: 1.6K

Rating: Teen

Warnings/Tags: Mentions of death, grief/trauma response to death of loved ones, mentions of blood, emotional pain, hurt & comfort, FLUFF, ANGST, non-sexual comfort, Astarion x GN!Tav, Minor Act 2 spoilers.

None of the others had ever seen Tav like this. They weren’t about to let anyone see them in this state now. After all, Tav was the sunshine of their party. Sunshine had one job; it was in its very name. 

It isn’t true. It isn’t! Get away from me. Go!

Sitting in their tent, as far away from the other party members as safely possible, Tav was powerless to stop the replaying of Arabella’s words over, and over, and over, in their mind. They saw in their mind’s eye the maelstrom of emotions that had played across the young tiefling’s face when Tav gently broke the news that her mother and father had been killed. Shock. Anguish. Disbelief. Rage. Despair. Resentment.

Tav knew those feelings well. They had felt them before. They still felt the echoes of them, even now, so many years after the death of their own parents. Tav had been so like Arabella in their youth. They had recognized a kinship with the tiefling as soon as they met her in the Emerald Grove. To be the one who ushered in those emotions for someone so young and so full of unbridled joy - it was a cruel irony. To be that bearer of such unspeakable news, to a mere child. 

Though Tav knew that time would eventually take the immediate sting from this news, they also knew from their own experience that Arabella would forever be scarred. Even before she was aware, the world had been violently reforming beneath her feet. Life would never be as it once was. And the knowledge that they would forever be intertwined with Arabella’s memory of losing her parents, even if those deaths had not come at their hands, felt like opening the fissure in their heart all over again and injecting acid throughout its crevices. 

The reality of it all had Tav doubled over, sobbing into their hands in a feeble attempt at hiding their pain from the rest of the camp. None of the others had ever seen Tav like this. They weren’t about to let anyone see them in this state now. After all, Tav was the sunshine of their party. Sunshine had one job; it was in its very name. 

Most of the time, Tav didn’t mind being that cheery glue that held people together. It was a role that was helpful to others, and they had performed it very well throughout their life. It also had the added benefit of distracting Tav from hosts of problems that were better left in the far corners of their mind. Seeing them like this, in this state of despair? It would topple the whole façade. And given where they were, in a bleak forest of darkness, fumbling through perpetual night, Tav knew the party needed sunshine more than ever before if they had any prayer of making it through this area alive.

So, no, Tav resolved to work through this pain in solitude. They had done so before. They could do it again. 

***

The Shadow-Cursed Lands were not exactly an Eden for animals that could quell Astarion’s thirst. Most of the beasts were either blighted or dead. Given this, Astarion had purchased an ox and some boar from the Harpers at the Last Light Inn for the express purpose of draining their blood and storing it in vials he could consume along the way. Gale had come up with a handy little spell to keep the containers cool and prevent the blood from spoiling. He estimated that those reserves, coupled with Tav’s generosity of allowing him to feed off them, would be enough to keep him stable for several more days. 

He heard the sound as he was exiting his tent to retrieve a vial of ox blood from the camp supplies. 

Muffled choking sounds. Someone was…crying? He piqued his ears, concentrating to locate the direction from which they came. 

Tav’s tent. He was sure of it. 

Pitched as far away from the others as possible, Astarion had thought it odd earlier in the evening that Tav had positioned themselves so far away from everyone, including himself. Normally, they rested at the dead center of the camp, where they could easily chatter and joke with the rest of the party. But, given his own proclivity for solitude, he hadn’t pondered it further, assuming Tav had just needed some quality time to themselves. 

Hearing their quiet sobs now, in the middle of the night, Astarion could have kicked himself for not realizing sooner that something was wrong. 

Though he had confessed his feelings several days ago and found them wholeheartedly reciprocated, his new… status… with Tav felt like learning a new language. A language with an alphabet wholly different than anything he had ever known. He certainly wasn’t fluent yet. He wasn’t even sure if his ability to… speak it, per se… was passable. But, if for nothing else, he was grateful to Tav for their patience and understanding as he navigated this entirely foreign situation. They never asked for anything more than he was willing to give, and that empathy continued to compel him to try. For himself. For Tav. For their future prospects. 

Of course, knowing all of this made Astarion feel all the more worse for failing to intuit Tav’s emotional state. They were not exactly a closed book. Had he not have fallen back on old ways of thinking and processing people’s behavior, he likely could have recognized the signs of Tav’s distress. But 200 years of habits and mindset was hard to break. He could hear Tav’s voice in his head, gently reminding him to be patient with himself, to afford himself grace. 

They were always giving him the space to be vulnerable. This time, he wanted to try providing them with the same assurance. 

Astarion quietly padded over to Tav’s tent and cleared his throat in a somewhat awkward attempt at announcing his presence. 

Immediately, the sobbing ceased. “Um, just a moment!” came Tav’s watery reply. 

Astarion listened carefully to Tav’s quiet sniffles and movements about the tent. He assumed they were quickly trying to right themselves, slip that cheery mask they wore so well back on. The thought broke his heart. 

“Tav, darling, can I come in?” he asked softly so that their fellow party members would not be able to hear. 

“Oh sure, are you thirsty? I was just lying down… resting,” Tav added lamely before finally poking their head out from between the tent flaps. They gave him a tiny smile, a weak attempt at normalcy, before pulling back and making room for him to enter.

Astarion seated himself across from Tav, who began rearranging their pillows and preparing for what they assumed to be another feeding session. He took in their ruddy cheeks, their tearstained eyes, swollen from crying so much. Tentatively, the movement still so foreign but becoming more familiar, he reached out a hand to cup their cheek. 

Tav stilled at his touch, sucking in a breath. He watched as tears began welling in their eyes.

“Darling, you don’t need to hide your pain from me,” he gently intoned. 

Tav gave a breathless laugh, traitorous tears leaking down their face. 

“I didn’t want any of you to see me like this. Especially you,” they warbled, sniffling. 

“And why ever not?”

“I’m ‘Tav The Sunshine,’ remember?” they said with a self-deprecating grin. “The sun only ever shines on us. That’s its job.”

“But the sun isn’t always shining,” Astarion reminded them softly. “Times of darkness are allowed.”

Tav released a quiet sob. “I don’t… w-want you to see that darkness. It’s too much… I… I can’t-”

Seeing Tav fall apart before his eyes, so broken and disconsolate, the urge to take them in his arms felt like second nature. Not a foreign language at all, not a struggle to initiate a touch. Astarion couldn’t explain it; his subconscious had known how to respond and barreled through all those years of self-loathing, manipulation, and disgust to reach out for Tav. Quick as a flash but so very gently, he pulled them into an embrace, maneuvering them so they sat cradled in his lap, their arms wrapped around shoulders. 

“My sweet, sweet Tav,” Astarion crooned as they cried into his shoulder, tears quickly dampening his nightshirt. He raised one hand to push back the locks obscuring their face and softly caressed their cheek. 

“I want to tell you something,” he continued. “And I want you to truly listen... I’ve walked in darkness for over 200 years. Mostly alone. Committing depraved acts against others in the service of a master who sees me as nothing more than a means to an end… There is nothing - nothing - in your darkness that could scare me away. I swear it.”

Tav raised their head to look at him. Slowly - as one would approach a wild animal - they raised their hand and kept it hovering right beside Astarion’s face. 

That Tav would still be thinking of his comfort, even in their abject sadness, unleashed a powerful wave of… some strong emotion in him. 

Is that love? Is that what it feels like? He thought. 

He couldn’t be sure. It was unlike anything he had ever felt before. 

Acknowledging their silent request for consent, Astarion pushed his cheek into their hand. He turned his face for a moment to kiss their palm. He felt Tav shudder in his arms. 

“You’ve already borne so much sorrow in your long life, Astarion,” they whispered. “You deserve lightness and levity from your partner.”

“And you have given me that every day since we met, darling,” he returned, carding his fingers through Tav’s hair. “But we also agreed to share something real between us. That isn’t possible if you hide a part of yourself away. You deserve space for light and darkness inside yourself, Tav.”

They sat in silence for some time, Astarion allowing Tav to empty their tears onto his chest, until they were finally calmed. 

“You’re right. I’m sorry,” Tav finally sniffled.

“Shh, shh. There’s no space for apologies here, love. But, there is space to share your pain. And I’ll carry it with you, as you do for me,” Astarion promised. 

And in that quiet night, in the heart of the Shadow-Cursed Lands, Tav opened their darkness to Astarion. 

And he was not afraid.

[cosmicjoke]

Alright, even though I haven't yet read a full translation of "Bad Boy, I just want to talk about some things from the pages we do have translated and what we see happen in the story itself.

I don't t think the level of psychological trauma Levi's experiences in this story can be overstated.

We see Levi cry when his mother's cup breaks on the floor. I think what's important to note about this, is that it takes place directly following Levi violently and brutally killing a group of men who had been threatening and beating him.

The first man Levi kills very nearly beats Levi to death. He's using a hammer fist to beat him, meaning his balled fist, and using the edge of his fist, not his knuckles, to beat Levi over and over, with Levi's head against the stone ground. He would have eventually beaten Levi to death if Levi's power hadn't awoken when it did. We also realize that Kenny has abandoned Levi before this happens. Looking through the panels again, I noticed Levi is wearing different clothes when Kenny leaves him than what he's wearing here, in the present. That means Kenny left Levi before his powers even awakened. He left him to fend for himself, a 9 year old child, on the streets of a place that had men like these prowling around, waiting and looking to prey on children, men who felt no hesitation in beating a child to death, or selling that child into sexual slavery. Clearly, Kenny couldn't be bothered to even wait for Levi to develop his actual powers before throwing him to the wolves. And once Kenny walks away, after years of drilling into him that strength is the only thing that matters, Levi is left not understanding what any of it was even for. His power finally awakens, and he brutally kills these men, and he doesn't understand any of it. He was taught violence, but for what purpose? He even asks "What's it for?" to the sole remaining assailant. He's talking about his strength. He doesn't understand why he's so strong, when it's gained him seemingly nothing, and resulted in nothing good. He's still alone, he's still in the dark, he's still existing in a world and in a life that offers him nothing but despair and hopelessness.

And this last man, in my view, is truly the most vile of the group. A truly cruel and hateful coward. We see this man begin to try and manipulate Levi, threatening him and lying to him about his own intentions, trying to claim he meant to "save" Levi, and perhaps most disgusting of all, using Levi's love for his mother against him in some twisted attempt to save his own life, by telling Levi that he would be sullying the memory of her by killing him. I can't begin to imagine the psychological toll this man's words had on Levi following this entire experience. I don't know what the entirety of the dialog between them is, yet, and I'll give a better analysis once that's revealed. But I think it's safe to assume, given what happens with Levi after, that this man's words to Levi likely solidified in Levi himself a belief in his own monstrosity.

Because we see Levi crying, after. When his mother's cup breaks in his hand, and shatters against the floor.

This is a trauma response.

Levi was clearly in shock leading up to that moment. We see him return to the place he and his mother presumably once lived, and we see Levi prepare a cup of tea, afterward staring vacantly into the liquid of the cup, remembering a clearly romanticized image of he and his mother drinking tea in that same spot. I say it's clearly romanticized, because we see a shaft of light in Levi's memory, coming down on the two of them, when in reality, in the present, there is no light at all. It's complete darkness. It's complete despair. I don't think Levi remembers his mother well. He clearly only has an impression of her, and it's an impression he's clearly idealized. An image of elegance and beauty in a world of filth and ruin.

When he picks the cups up to drink from it, the handle snaps, and the cup falls, shattering on the floor. The cup breaking is what finally snaps Levi out of his shock, and finally all the emotion of what's just happened to him comes crashing down, and he begins to cry. Again, this is very obviously a trauma response. It's not the cup itself breaking, but what it represents, I think, that reduces Levi to tears.

Because, really, that cup shattering represents the shattering of Levi's own innocence.

We can assume this is the first time he kills, and we see the devastating effect of it on Levi in the aftermath.

He's alone, abandoned by Kenny without explanation, after Kenny's approval of him had seemed predicated on Levi becoming strong. And so Levi is left here with nothing but confusion, the fading memory of his mother, the blood on his hands, something forced on him both by Kenny and the men who were attacking him, and with that horrible man's words no doubt echoing in his ears about how killing him would sully his mother's memory, that idealized image he has of his mother. One has to think Levi's own self-image was warped into that of a monster.

Levi killed those men with his bare hands, and in doing so, he displayed a truly shocking amount of strength. I'm talking something equivalent to or even greater than a brown bear or a tiger. We have to remember here that Levi is only 9 years old. He's a child. And he's able to do this.

And yet, it didn't come naturally to him at all.

Levi wanted these men to give back his mothers tea set. He asked them to give it back to him, because it didn't belong to them. He still asks, even after they beat him badly.

It's only after the brutality of their attack increases, that we see Levi try to actually fight back. He lands a punch on the man holding him down, and then that man begins to beat Levi to within an inch of his life, bringing his fist down on him over and over again, until Levi's power awakens and explodes out of him.

Levi resorted to violence in response to their increasing violence against him, but it wasn't his initial response. I know I go on and on about how I don't believe Levi is naturally inclined toward violence at all, but I think this story, for all its intense violence, demonstrates that beyond doubt.

Because Levi finally loses it, and he kills these men, and he does it in truly terrifying fashion. He tears them apart the way an animal would tear a person apart. He shows no mercy to the final man, who tries to squirm his way out of paying for his actions by lying to Levi and guilt-tripping him. It doesn't work, though. Levi kills him, too, and he does all this with seemingly no remorse and no feeling.

But, again, I come back to the immediate aftermath, when Kuchel's cup shatters on the floor, and we're reminded in stark, naked fashion that Levi is just a child. He was an innocent child. And that innocence was stolen from him by this incident. By Kenny teaching him how to kill, teaching him that strength was the only thing that mattered, but not explaining to him why before leaving him. By these men nearly killing him, by their brutality and cruelty and ugliness. By Levi having to kill them to save himself. And by his grieving fury and confusion over the point of any of it, when he kills the final man, even when he didn't have to. Levi breaking down into tears has nothing to do with the cup itself, but with what's just happened. He's horrified. I think he's horrified with himself, and he's alone, and the last, good memory he has, the one point of light in his life, this single, vague memory of his mother, has been shattered to pieces, literally and figuratively, with the shattering of Levi's own innocence.

I think that point of contrast, his memory of his mother's elegance and grace, with the brutality and violence of himself, in that moment, devastates Levi. I think he feels ashamed. I think he believes in that horrible man's words to him, about how he's disgraced his mother's memory by doing what he's done. Can there be any doubt that Levi begins to think of himself from this point on as an animal? As a monster? As "abnormal"?

We know from "No Regrets" and Isayama's own words, that Levi didn't have any friends until he met Furlan and Isabel, two people he didn't know until he himself was full grown. And so we know that from the age of 9, or even younger, since we see Kenny leave Levi before his powers even awaken, he's been on his own. He's been on his own all this time, while harboring the belief that he's some sort of savage and violent killer. That he's some kind of monster, possessing an immense strength that seems meant for nothing but death and destruction. As though he were an engine for pointless death and destruction.

And yet, all on his own, he comes to realize that his strength can be used for something else. That it can be used to help people. He saves Furlan's life, and he saves Isabel's life. And from that point on, with this realization of what his strength can be used for, Levi dedicates himself to that end. To using this immense and frightening strength to help people.

That Levi could come out of this experience still with the ability to love, to still have in him the ability to be loved, despite how all he'd ever known from love was suffering, and that he could come out of this still with the deep desire to help others, to do good, is honestly nothing short of a miracle, and I think it demonstrates more powerfully than anything the innate goodness in Levi.

Because there's so much negativity wrapped up in the concept of love for Levi. He watched his mother die, succumbing to disease, and there's little doubt in my mind that Levi blamed himself for that, her ability to care for herself compromised by his presence in her life, by being another mouth to feed, another back to clothe, when she could scarce afford to feed herself, could scarce afford to put clothes on her own back. And for his own love for her to end in an eruption of blood and violence, and the loss of his innocence, for Levi to come out of that with the ability to still connect with people, to form connections, to love and care for them, and allow himself to be loved and cared for in turn, it can only come from a deep well of genuine and innate goodness. From a heart that longs for kindness and compassion, even in the face of utter cruelty and despair.

Levi's tears demonstrate his despair and grief at his own violence. They demonstrate his bereavement and regret. They demonstrate his horror and loneliness. And they demonstrate, at his core, the persistence of a pure and loving heart that wishes to do and be good.

All of this horror wasn't enough to stamp out the goodness in Levi.

Despite it all, he became a genuine hero.

Despite it all, the goodness in him remains.