#Armada is like | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

therobotsarestuckinmyhead · 14 days ago

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♡ [MULTI] DRUNK DATES WITH MEGATRON(s)!

scenario: what it's like to get a drink with the warlord himself. enjoyed only by his beloved , i.e., you. usually one of you (its you) gets knocked out.

including: TFA, TFP, Armada, ES, WFC, BW.

warning: slightly suggestive, getting drunk

TFA Megs:

There are certain rare occasions when Megatron feels like spending some time with the finest luxuries— company and heavy refuelling. And what better company can he ask for in his habsuite than that of his most competent soldier and lover?

Megatron just flat out invites you for a ‘chat’ and it turns out to be a date.

He usually thinks that heavy refuelling is very crude and that it's just vulgar but sometimes, he really really needs a strong and heavy drink. Especially since he’s stuck on a warship with Starscream, Lugnut and Blitzwing.

TFA Megatron is a connoisseur when it comes to drinks. Every solar-cycle, he has at least one glass of high grade energon or refined oil in a wine glass as he monitors the Warship activities on his throne.

Megatron isn’t a simpleton. He has all the regal and luxurious types of drinks. If it isn’t high grade energon, refined oil, highly distilled petroleum or finely aged engex, Megatron won’t even touch the drink. It's not that his tanks can't handle cheap fuel, it can but he'd rather not.

This version of Megatron literally has a personal collection of the finest oil and energon, his intoxication tolerance definitely exceeds yours by a longshot and he is probably the Megatron with the highest tolerance out of them all. He will not lose himself. That means, by the time you get completely drunk, Megatron is only slightly intoxicated.

Also, this Megatron is probably the most romantic out of all of them. He’s old but he’s still a really smooth talker and as he gets more drunk, his occasional words of affectionate teasing and taunting throughout your conversation will just begin to get even more suggestive and seductive.

The two of you often dwell into more philosophical subjects, Megatron likes these conversations. He finds them quite meaningful and it gives him a wider view about your perception of things. Megatron often enlightens you with wisdom, he may be a warlord but he still has millions of years worth of life experience on his processor.

Sometimes, you share the more casual happenings on the ship and in your life. Things like Blitzwing’s antics, receiving a second opinion from Megatron about Blackarachnia’s face-plate care advice (TFA Megs would def be a expert on stuff like beauty care), Lugnut’s embarrassing speeches about Megatron’s glory (Megatron finds them downright embarrassing) and of course, Starscream’s devious plots you overhear when the mech is busy rambling to himself, thinking that nobody can hear him. Everyone can.

It's just you talking as the warlord listens. You don't even realise that you’re snitching on Random’s numerous pranks on Lugnut to Megatron.

As much as Megatron doesn't approve of tomfoolery amongst his underlings, he does find these things amusing. He even chuckles at them. Sometimes, the way you describe things pulls out a genuine laugh out of him. Megatron’s rarely ever even smiled since the defeat of the Decepticons.

He’s glad that he’s got someone like you to crack him up. Megatron would not vocalise much about it but he absolutely adores your company. The words that roll off his glossa may be only teasing, taunting and sexual innuendos but behind his optics is just pure adoration for you.

These wonderful times usually end with you getting blackout drunk and Megatron generously letting you recharge on his berth, he will literally tuck you in his bed and give you a soft kiss on your helm if he’s in a rally good mood. You’ll have to sneak out without the other ‘Cons noticing the next morning though. There are some occasions where things do take a more romantic turn though but it never exceeds you sloppily kissing his helm and smothering his face in kisses as he tries to get you to bed (he will not return the favour even if he does find your affections utmost pleasurable).

If you’re lucky, things can get a bit more sexual. You have to initiate though, as in, straight out say it. Megatron loves being aware of the fact that he can get you off.

None of the other Decepticons are aware of your late drinking sessions with the leader himself so they’re just confused as to how Megatron is so up to date about the latest mischiefs and mishaps.

He definitely wants to do this more often with you.

TFP Megs:

Only behind closed doors is this version of Megatron affectionate albeit in a very tame way and when he’s drunk, Megatron is almost the same except it’s in a more impulsive way also he does get slightly more aggressive. Megatron definitely does lose himself completely in his drink, he loses all sense of rational thought and is up to do anything he and you want to.

This Megatron rarely gets the chance to indulge himself in the pleasures of high grade energon so his tolerance pales in comparison to TFA Megatron and a few of his other counterparts but still is far more impressive than most.

He probably would just blare the ship’s speakers and order you to come to the control bridge which is near to his quarters. Asks you to follow him. He just flat out leads you to his habisuite. Not a lot of explanations are given but once you see the drinks, its clear what he’s called upon you for. Megatron flat out expects you to just obey cause he’s too embarrassed to ask.

It’s not like he doesn’t want to get drunk, he does but he’s just too busy like most Megatrons. He just doesn’t have the time and Piranha faced Megs ain’t like TFA Megs who sips out high-grade out of a wine glass whenever he feels like it.

Also, Megatron really doesn’t care what kind of drinks there are. He’s fine with anything that can make him reach a high. Megatron is not picky.

The two of your drinking activities usually include whatever goofy shit you and him want to do. Megatron loses himself and he just follows your orders, he does often retort with formal snarky remarks but he’ll still be down for it. He’s extremely complicit.

With TFP Megs, drunk antics take place. It's not just drunk conversation or affections, there’s more action. It’s more activity oriented. Like singing stupid songs. It’s embarrassing but Megatron secretly likes the more upbeat pop songs and two of you just sing your sparks out to said songs. One time, the two of you dueted Aqua’s “Barbie Girl”.

The two of you duet songs while drunk or hold silly poetry competitions. Yes, writing while drunk, you can imagine how disastrous the results were.

Sometimes, the two of you watch some human movies together (Only when he’s drunk, Megatron will only touch human media if he is drunk. Try this with him when he’s not and he will laugh at your face for even suggesting the idea) and Megatron is the type to ruin the whole thing by babbling about inaccuracies and how stupid the plot is.

He will end up in a fight so you better prepare yourself. This is one of the reasons why the two of you only drink in his quarters, the door is locked to make sure nobody walks in on Megatron and you, sitting on the floor as you paint each other’s servos. He gave you a Decepticon themed servo-paint with the insignia tattered across your servos. It sort of looks like those wallpapers that you’ve seen in human phones but very very messy. Starscream walked in on you two singing ‘Barbie Girl’ and proceeded to record the whole thing, ever since then, Megatron has been more discreet.

Megatron chugs down like a pirate so he’s usually the first one to get blacked out even though he has high tolerance. Like, he can down a whole barrel in one go. You end up having to haul his giant frame onto his berth.

Once Megatron wakes up, he has a painful hangover. It’s all worth it though. He got to make some real memories that he can smile back onto. But that thought runs away as cringe overwhelms his frame the second he sees his drunk poetry.

He’s ashamed of himself for ever agreeing to do even half of the embarrassing stuff the two of you did. Then again, the two of you were totally wasted. None of you had any idea what you were doing. Just purely acting on impulsive thought.

He isn't that angry or embarrassed about it as you would expect him to be though. Megatron is always busy, it's always nice to finally get some time to spend with his beloved. Even if the things you did together were cringey.

He’s a total dork when he’s drunk. A massive shift of demeanor.

Armada Megs:

I’ll be real with you, not happening. Never happening. If it did, it would be because he’s finally had enough of everything and genuinely doesn’t give a fuck anymore.

Cause, this Megatron is probably the most smug, snarky and prideful out of the bunch and that’s something cause he’s against TFP and TFA here. The chance that he would even let you s t a n d right next to him is a big question. He’s gotta be really really into you for that or he’s just flat out desperate for someone to talk to. The relationship between the two of you isn’t the healthiest. This mech has no soft spots.

This Megatron needs the best— no questions asked. If there’s no refined high grade, he doesn’t want it. He’s picky and he’s a big baby about it. Say that to his face though and it would be a full-on ride to blaster-ville.

Since y'all are on the moon, there’s not a lot of places to have drinks privately. So, Megatron usually plans this beforehand and selects whatever location he wants. He also informs you about such. He’s ridiculously formal about it too. He tells you which time, which spot and all in his usual commanding voice. It’s his weird version of a date.

Megatron says that he wants to have a private chat with you in front of you and the others. They buy it all the time. Nobody knows what the two of you are up to. Cyclonus and Starscream are very curious and Demolisher is theorizing what's happening. A relationship is the last thing they could thing of— But Starscream (intially) will be sort of jealous that you seem to have Megatron's recognition more than he does.

At the start, drinking with him is just the two of you sitting down as you listen to Megatron blabber about whatever he wants to talk about. Usually, it’s about his day and how incompetent his lackeys Cyclonus and Demolisher are or he’s gonna rant about how he’s going to destroy Optimus Prime as if he hasn’t said the exact same things a bajillion times. But if the beetle-head is feeling a little better, he might praise you for being a really reliable soldier.

Megatron here is embarrassingly a lightweight drinker. His tolerance is below average. Tell anyone and you will be demoted. Three small cubes are enough to get this ‘Con tipsy.

His gait gets all messed up when he’s drunk and he gets wildly unpredictable so you just appease your lord with what he wants to hear. Megatron is a real douche and if you piss him off, he will verbally destroy you. He’s like Eminem if he was a poet. He might feel slightly bad afterwards but will not apologise. He’s a jerk.

Things do take a turn and the leader of the Decepticons himself might end up being just spontaneously affectionate out of nowhere when he’s fully intoxicated. Full on love bombing you and kissing you. Telling you how much he loves you, praising you and such. You can’t tell if he’s being flat out manipulative or if this is genuine.

In contrast to his loud and commanding way of speech, Megatron mumbles a lot when he’s drunk.

He also gets extra handsy when he’s drunk. Megatron needs to have his hands occupied for some weird reason. Sometimes his arms would be wrapped around your shoulders or maybe even your waist. He won’t think much of it though.

Show him any signs of affection and he will be caught off guard. First time you did it, he was genuinely flustered on the inside even though he repeatedly denied your allegations. The next time, Megatron will be ridiculously smug about it after the slight shock.

He’s the first to pass out. You have to put him on his throne, his berth or the berths on the med-bay; if you leave him on the floor, he will be pissed. You have to haul him back. You usually cook up a story like the Autobots attacked the two of you or something by those lines. He has mixed feelings about it... considering how it seems as if he lost against the Autobots in your cooked up story but it did cover him well so he didn’t mind it entirely.

It's not really fun hanging out with him but he’s your pathetic yet lovable... warlord and loser.

Earthspark Megs:

This Megatron is kind of like a dad except he doesn’t make dad jokes like Optimus would try to. You can rely on him, he’ll take care of you, he would be really respectful and overall just a gentle-bot. He’s far more sentimental and romantic than the other Megatrons.

Megatron would love to have a drink with you because he thinks it would be nice. No ulterior motives, nothing to vent out and not out of frustration and desperation for relaxation.

He’s really casual about this and will ask you face-to-face. “Would you like to have a drink with me?”— simple yet formal. A yes or no question, something which the other Megatrons would try to avoid.

Megatron is really fine with drinking any type of intoxicating forms of energon as long as it doesn’t come with major health risks. He isn’t picky at all.

He was a heavy drinker back in the day and still is, he can last for ridiculously long. Longer than even TFA Megatron. He is supposed to be a cannon deviant timeline of the OG show, that means he’s technically good guy G1 Megs (i think, im not sure) and that mech chugged down those energon in glass cubes like it was his last day alive. You can’t tell me that he doesn’t have the highest tolerance out there.

A conversation with him while being intoxicated is actually really fun unlike with Beetle-Bot or Piranha Face. The two of you talk and listen to each other. There’s more mutual conversation and laughter. He doesn’t really have a good sense of humour but you make him laugh uncontrollably. Both of you usually discuss your day, your hobbies, your interests and just the randomest topics possible. He’s incredibly sweet.

Megs is a sweetheart. He would treat this more like a date than any of the other Megatrons. He would make beforehand preparations, picking out locations and even picking your favorite kind of drink.

The two of you usually do this in the woods, away from all the noise of the city and away from all prying human eyes as well as optics.

He would include human drinks as well if you like them— wine, vodka, beer, whiskey, brandy; you name it. This Megatron is much more open to trying new stuff. He likes wine and beer a lot. Even if both of your frames struggle to combust it.

Megatron might share old war stories of his. He doesn’t share them with a happy face though, Megatron here is ashamed of who he once was and truly resents the things he’s done. He wants to change for the better. It’s best if you don’t mention his past during these wholesome times with him.

Affectionate. Behind his gaze is just pure love-struckness when his optics land on you, this only gets amplified when he’s drunk.

He verbally shows this love through mild teasing.

He’s really old and he’s ridiculously mature now. Megatron wouldn’t get into any drunk antics unfortunately and he will drink only to a certain limit. He is not getting blacked out.

Will definitely accompany you back home. Megatron will make sure that you’re safe and sound before he returns to the GHOST headquarters

He’s so babygirl.

WFC Megatron:

This mech is probably the most unstable Cybertronian out there.

All the other Megatrons have at least some sort of time for you but this guy? He’s planning, surveying and assessing the Decepticon army and assets. Making battle plans, coming up with formations, interrogating Autobot POWs, reading reports sent from the scouts and spies. In other words, this Megatron is a pure workaholic and he barely gets any time with you.

Which is why he so happily (even if he doesn't look like it on the outside) acceots your offer to drink with you.

Megatron in this universe, while drunk, just begins venting and ranting. He’ll even maybe shed tears, if he was capable. The only time he’ll ever openly discuss how he feels about things entirely is when he’s drunk. Intoxication with him is purely emotional.

Megatron has done a lot of downright devious and heinous scrap which he justifies by convincing himself that it was for the ‘greater good’. He does feel bad for doing so, he even envies Shockwave to an extent as he doesn’t feel any emotion. Megs knows he’s doing it wrong but he just can’t see another way for it to work.

Energon shortages make it difficult for drinking sessions but he does have a small stash of engex he’d kept safe long before the war. Megatron isn’t picky at all here. If it works, he’ll have it. He had stolen some from a random upper class bot back during his gladiatorial times. You also have your own private stash.

Megatron will drink until he feels entirely numb, devoid of all emotion. He had insanely high tolerance and doesn’t black out. If he wasn’t the leader of the Decepticons, he would’ve been the Cybertronian equivalent of an alcoholic.

Him getting drunk with you is just him pouring out all of his emotions to you. Megatron is not alright in the processor and he desperately needs a hug. Whenever he needs a drink, he just needs comfort.

And he does find comfort. Not just in the drink but with your company as well. You’re the one ‘Con he knows that will never betray him and he loves you, you’re the only one he trusts. Megatron really does. He even smiles at you often when its just you two. You’re the Elita to his Prime. Cybertron is in ruins, it's uninhabitable, it can’t even be called his home. A home is somewhere where you can live respectably, Cybertron was anything but that. The only real home to Megatron is your embrace.

He’s sacrificed nearly everything for Cybertron. For his quest to fulfil the Decepticon cause and bring forth a just Cybertron. Megatron absolutely dreads the day where he will have to sacrifice you as well for the cause and for Cybertron and he will have to do it, he knows. He knows that he won’t have a choice.

So he tries his very best to spend the limited quality time he gets with you to the fullest. He desperately wants to detach from his reality but he doesn’t have a choice— he has to stay strong for all the other Decepticons. He wants this war over as much as any other Cybertronian does but only until Optimus admits defeat.

You do try to make the situation less dark by trying to squeeze in a light hearted joke or two. They do make him smile, rarely.

Do not ever bring up Optimus Prime in any given situation. Megatron gets drunk to detach himself from reality. Bringing up the bot that ruined his life from Megatron’s perspective will just make him sour.

He loves you, he really does. Megatron would mourn you in silence for the rest of his lifetime if you were to be terminated, it would damn near break him. He’s surprisingly the most sentimental and emotional out of all the Megatrons. He never hides his intentions, he’s honest about that at least when compared to most of the other Megatrons. He is blunt and will just say things to your face. He might toy with you if he finds doing so in the current conversation amusing.

Just give him some hope that things will get better, that you believe he’s doing the ‘right thing’. Hope is what Megatron needs the most in such dark times. You give him hope.

Megatron hopes everyday that he never has to lose you. He gets uncharacteristically soft and slightly needy when drunk. He just needs someone there.

BW Megatron:

Megatron, unlike all the other Megatrons, genuinely doesn’t like getting drunk at all. He believes that it’s just a cheap petty distraction from reality for the weak minded, an escape if anything and if Megatron wants to take out the Maximals and bring forth a Predacon-ruled Cybertron, he can’t afford to have distractions.

Especially in his current state, stranded on a primitive planet with troops that are small in number and ridiculously incompetent, trapped in a compromised situation against a Maximal troop with dwindling resources on both sides, Megatron has to scheme if he and his dream are to survive.

But there was an occasion where he did indulge in some high grade, only the fancy ones though. It's bad enough that he stoops as low as to chase a high but as long as it’s something expensive and exquisite, he doesn’t mind as much as he normally would.

A very small part of the energon that the Predacons mine are in fact distilled and refined and turned into quality high grade energon. Quickstrike is usually in charge of that, Megatron takes as much as he pleases from those reserves.

These high grade reserves are mainly there just to sedate the rowdy and incompetent following that Megatron was unfortunate enough to recruit, he needs something to motivate them.

When Optimus Primal is really starting to get on his nerves, Megatron takes a good strong drink. Especially when Primal returned with a transmetal form. That ticked him off.

Megatron has a rather average tolerance. He’s in between Armada and TFP Megs. He generally doesn’t like to have company, even if it's you but there is an undeniable loneliness within him— but that's mostly because it sucks to be the only smart one in a group.

You just so happened to be walking by to catch him and he made you swear to never tell anyone else. But since you were there anyway, he might as well let you enjoy it with him.

Don’t be fooled, Megaton has absolutely no emotional attachment to you what so ever. To him, you’re an actually usable asset so he only value you in that sense so he’s almost always professional on duty. To him, a bot is just a means to an end. But at least the means to an end in this case was somewhat more refined and amusing than the other classless brutes he had on-board.

He’s a smooth talker, he knows just what to say to get your circuits in a knot. He’s either very formal, very suggestive or flat out snarky— no in-betweens.

The interactions would be rather short as compared to the other Megatrons. He doesn’t appreciate company a lot and he has actually for once has no ulterior motive other than to just get wasted.

He would never drink till he’s blackout drunk, he’s got way more self control than any of the other Megatrons. BW Megs is way more responsible.

I WROTE FOR LIKE SIX MEGATRONS and there's still IDW, Cybertron, TFO, Cyberverse like bruh. im probably not gonna write for those for though bc this is one of my older works on ao3 i wrote on a whim. I've barely watched half of ES btw, that's why it's not in my request list.

guess who's my favorite transformer? also, the ES Megs might not be that nice cause my lame ass only watched a quarter of ES S1. i didn't finish it lmao. still havent.

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