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#BABES IM HAPPY ABOUT THAT OKAY
sqlmn · 1 month
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by the power of modern day AU, I am delighted to announce that Fulj can have a girlfriend ! I haven't named her yet but have a few in mind so ... soon (TM). She is the one that she loved in canon before the whole memory wipe and as you can see, penchant for black, black hair, brown eyes, and prone to weird statements. Perfect balance to Deacon's weird questions.
HOWEVER ! I mentioned the problem of Deacon still having facial blindness to someone and how there is no glow from the deities for him to identify them. And her solution is the funniest thing ever so I have to do it. He identifies people by smell. So when he is in the same room as Ymber and Oh when they first cross paths, he doesn't really think about it. But later when he sees Ymber alone and gets the same kinda scent, same cologne or something, he knows that's not the taller guy therefore that's his scent ! Perfect!
So... unfortunately.... Deacon really can't beat the weirdness allegations in AUs...... he's stuck like that. Fulj has referred to him as a guard dog in canon and now he's a tracking dog. RIP to him.
(and because Deacon gets my facial blindness I am giving Fulj's girlfriend ANOTHER trait of mine I wouldn't wish on anyone because it's also really funny. She can't smell. She can taste ! She just can't smell. So she loves talking to Deacon because he explains smells as foods for her to get the vibe across. Which are REALLY weird conversations no one else wants to hear.)
#the daily life of a deity sucks#modern deities and their weird lives#im gonna actually make that the tag#also The Girlfriends live together and so they have the same kinda scent to Deacon but even if he only has one around#he can pick them out which weirds Fulj out even more until hes like#but if I smell you and there is no greeting its you and if I do get a greeting its the other#and Fulj is just baffled that THATs the tell ... flipping greetings#also since Oh is just one person in the AU since they were never split to two#they are delighted by the funny scent tracking and is just SO happy to tell Deacon and Ymber#Hey Ym I need to borrow your boyfriend so he can pick out a nice cologne for me so he knows its me#and Ymber is like weird but okay whatever you want if hes ok with it#and Deacon is too ??? over being referred to as Ymbers boyfriend and not having it outright denied so he agrees in a daze#to go help pick out their cologne and just question his life at this point#because he cant not be weird he has to go above and beyond while explaining how a cherry smell tastes#and everyone except the girlfriend who hears it is just... kinda.... weirded out by how he describes things#while the gf is absolutely delighted to have such descriptions#Fulj is just ... i love you babe but hes so weird how do you do it#and everyone else except deacon is just whispering to each other about who has to break it to Fulj#that her gf and Deacon are basically the exact same levels of weird and no one wants to because she will get so defensive#the gf just wants to dress deacon up like a goth or emo and he doesnt really know how to interpret the interest in his clothing#and just they are so precious and never woulda met in canon even if Fulj didnt have her wiped from her memory#she was alive centuries ago
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xiaohuayaos · 5 months
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i really love your lbfad posts, You really Get the characters. I'm so fond of the mortal arc in particular because it shows the characters being able to goof off and have some silly fun. It's wild but I once saw someone get through the entire mortal arc of the show and somehow come to the conclusion dfqc is just awful and abusive? Truly bizzare takes on the wider internet.
Aw, I'm glad you enjoy my posts- I appreciate knowing 💗 but yeah the wider internet can be Very interesting.... I think one of the first things I saw outside tumblr about the show was a decent review that I was enjoying reading up until the point when the author just started in on how terrible and annoying Xiao Lanhua was and how she only watched the show in spite of her and I was just ??????? like at the end of the day we are all entitled to our own opinions and feelings but there's a lot of opinions and feelings I do not agree with <3 to put it nicely <3
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currentlyonstandbi · 1 year
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#look this was probably the most experimental post i've ever done considering i had to make the newspaper article from scratch#and to be entirely honest i uuuh im not happy with it lmao#i should've done an obituary instead of the article but too late ! i have no energy to start again#but whatever .the point is that the article is supposed to allude to alex's death okay so yes obituary would've worked better but too bad#idk i think i just had a massive brain blegh halfway through which sucks because i was thinking about this post all day#but the idea behind the whole concept and the QUOTE in the first place and the stupid article concept#was the idea that nigel wasn't the only one to kill himself at the end of the film#alex did too . just not in the literal sense#alex kills the old version of himself . kills the who he used to be#this did not do that quote or the intention behind the post justice but i'm just gonna dump it here and go#also deep in tags is the best place for me to put the random shit i'm thinking of and i've had the trainyard scene on my mind lately#but i left my thoughts to simmer too long and now it's been reduced into thickness 😞 but anyway#greg may have been too much of a coward to give them the maraclea ending they deserved#but he will never be able to take away the fact that the trainyard scene will always be their version of the myth TO ME and me only probs#okay because that story is supposed to parallel the typical conventions of marriage - the consumation when he lays with the body#and then 9 months later the skull symbolises a birth resulting from their union#that moment at the railway ? where nigel shoots himself with the very gun alex is holding?#that's their consumation babes; their union; their wedding#'pray for me pray for yourself we're one now' may as well be their vows#and what do we get as a result of that union 9 months later? we get jack#jack is the product of these 2 people becoming 1 and just like the skull granted great power to the lord#so too does jack grant power to alex; the power to take control of his life and forge his own path forward#me making this post 🤝 cats : oooooo big stretch#seriously#lowkey glad no one will see this in the tag search lmao#like minds
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i watched My Neighbor Totoro for the first time, here's my chronological viewing experience:
woo-hoo! dusty old japanese house with japanese architectural details aplenty
these kids got some ENERGY my goodness
family dynamic's adorable. peak quality dad humor
kids: our house is haunted. parents: that's so cool!
hell yeah, wrinkled old lady rep. we need more friendly old women with potato faces and warts like storybook witches. the backbone of society, these ladies
Plot Summary: Small Child Bothers Local Wildlife
sacred tree sacred tree sacred tree
Introducing Totoro! nobody said this fucker's got TEETH???
Uh-Oh! Inadequate Parental Supervision Detected
(you misplaced your four year old! you're not supposed to do that)
4-year-old: i met a magic forest spirit. dad: oh shit fr?
4-year-old: *angrily hugs sister* missed u bitch
this small child has a smile like a toad. like a really really cute toad. like the cutest toad in all existence. i love her she's perfection please just let this child be happy
rice paddies are so pretty....so back breaking....rice is such a prissy crop
*my crush is stranded in a rainstorm* takethisumbrellait'syoursnowBYE *runs away in panic im so good at flirting*
Giant Chinchilla Learns To Hold Umbrella, Is Fucking Delighted By Experience
take this, it will help you on your quest! *hands u trail mix wrapped in a leaf*
LO-FI HIP HOP STUDY LIST!
crouching down to peer at dirt--A++ top notch foundational childhood experience
mom has a big ass forehead
honey! the chinchillas are performing Rituals in the backyard again
help yeah let's jack and the bean stalk this shit
huh so we're all just climbing aboard the giant chinchilla's tiddies now ok
class trip!
the pure adrenaline of Vegetable Gardening
no! the small child is crying! she is bawling her eyes out. no no no. i can't cope with this. emotionally i cannot cope 🥺🥺🥺
i've only had Mei one hour but if anything happens to her i will raze this earth and everyone on it
please someone make this small child smile again
oh no the tall child is crying too
i can't take this. my heart can't take this.
i need a drink
small child running determined to deliver magic veggies to the hospital. this kid is my hero
she is also unsupervised. so, so unsupervised
babe you are FOUR
godDAMMIT ghibli, you cannot give me watercolor sunsets while a small child is missing. u are killing me. my heart is giving out. this is me, experiencing heart failure.
Totoro to the rescue!
no wait CATBUS to the rescue!
i admit i initially thought the cat was a creep. alice in wonderland prejudiced me. i have revised my notions of smiling cats
i've decided the cat is a metaphor for the magic of a robust public transport system
MEI'S OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and so is mom. she's a lovely lady im sorry for what i said about her forehead. it's a noble forehead.
happy ending YES bitch!!!!!!
ok. ok ok ok. that was magical.
(as a first-time adult viewer i was worried i wouldn't be able to Access the Magic. but i could and i did and it was incredible. that was culture. that was ART. joy distilled into animated form. holy rites of childhood. i understand now. how glorious, this world we grow out of. how full of marvels. i'm going outside to smell grass and sun and get dirt under my fingernails. miraculous.)
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zreamy · 6 months
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i'll love you forever
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pairing: park sunghoon x fem!reader
summary: you were sunghoon's first everything; first friend, first love, and first heartbreak. after years of quietly crushing on you, he was finally ready to confess. so ready to confess, that he told his parents the two of you were already dating! it was an easy enough lie to keep up and he kept it up for months, what could possibly go wrong? he thought. little did he know, you would have a falling out and stop talking for months.. and then, you'd both get invited to spend a week at home with his parents, who still believe you're his girlfriend.
genre: smut, fluff, angst, college au, childhood best friends to lovers, fake dating
warnings: minors dni, fake dating is pretty mild (sorry), she kinda doesn’t rate him at the start, these two kind of exist in a vacuum a little bit idk i had a self-enforced word count to stick to and broke it.. (im within the 10% allowance !), sunghoon in a vest, sunghoon arms, sunghoon
word count: 21,858
playlist: click here.. (for my non-spotify babes, the main song is light by wave to earth (which for some reason i put last.. whatever))
author's note: for silly @asahicore. happy birthday pooks i hope it's amazing and that u enjoy reading this when u have the time !!! LOL (lots of love) also im never writing without telling you things again this was so absurd.
to everyone else.. ok happy reading also emma did not beta read this so im sure it's missing its charm .. anyway it's for emma not you 😭 anyway i hope u enjoy regardless and lmk ur thoughts! omg this is the first fic im nervous about posting.......... please enjoy or else.
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In the three years since Park Sunghoon moved away for university, he’d been doing a pretty good job of going home to see his parents. They’d welcome their baby back to the nest with open arms and wide grins. With a rehearsed level of indifference, his younger sister, Yeji, would say, “Oh, I didn’t know you were coming home this weekend.” when she saw him at the dinner table. Sunghoon pretended to only be marginally hurt by this. 
In the last three months, he hasn’t so much as sent a text to his parents. 
Or to you. 
Ignoring texts from his mother is devastating. Between classes, he watches as, “Hi, sweetie, I love you 😍,” turns into, “Missing you, honey, know you must be busy but spare some time for your old mummy, no?” which turns into, “Getting really worried now, are you doing okay? Has something happened with YN? Talk to me, I love you, my baby boy!” 
Ignoring texts from you is easy because texts from you never come. 
Sitting at the end of his bed, Sunghoon rereads a text his mother sent a few minutes ago: Please talk to me, son. Really worried and YN isn’t answering calls either. What’s going on with you two?
When he leaves his room, he finds Jake lying on the couch, and with his keys in hand, Sunghoon says, “I’m going home.” 
And the drive is great! At least, he tells his mum it is. In truth, the drive home without you was nearly impossible. Your ever-expanding home time playlist buzzed through the speakers in his car, but without you there to screech along to the songs, it wasn’t the same. He felt your absence the most when he stopped to get petrol and you weren’t there behind him struggling to carry enough snacks to feed a small family without offering to pay. 
The look of worry on his mum’s face stirs a pit in his stomach. “Why are you so quiet these days? God, you look so tired,” she says, frowning. “Is it school? Or something with YN? It’s not like her not to text back.” Her brows crease as she whispers the word unless. She pulls him into a hug, her chin resting perfectly on his shoulder, and her comforting hand strokes the hair on the back of his head. “Breakups are never easy, honey. I’m so sorry, I know how much you love her.” 
Breakups are never easy. The sentence hangs heavy over his head. 
Whether she knows it or not, she’s handed him a get-out-of-jail-free card, the opportunity to set things straight, to end this mess once and for all. No further questions, and most importantly, no more lies. 
For the first time since he left your flat three months ago, Sunghoon lets himself cry. He’d imagined this moment countless times, his first cry since you ended things. In his mind, it was always intense. Today, as it happens, only a few salty tears leak from his eyes, spilling onto the cuff of his sleeve, darkening the blue cotton in tiny indigo splotches. 
“We didn’t break up,” he says in a small voice—for some reason. “I’m just having a hard time.” Neither statement is technically untrue, but the words taste rotten in his mouth.
The tightening grip of his mum’s arms around his body is what brings on the harsh, shoulder-racking sobs he’d been anticipating. For a while, they stand like this, Sunghoon weeping into his mum’s cardigan until she sends him upstairs to lie down, promising a cup of tea that never comes. 
His childhood bedroom is chilly, so he changes into clothes he left behind and climbs into bed, pulling his duvet up to his chin. He turns his head to look at the walls and the room around him, everything is exactly where he left it in the summer. It should be comforting, but it’s weird to be home without you. 
There are photos of you and him everywhere, growing up and around each other through different stages of life. The two of you together during the summer your family moved in next door, you wore glasses back then and were the first friend he’d made in his life. Sunbathing and sharing earphones at the beach, listening to music together on your iPod classic. Sunghoon in thick glasses with a stiff smile and your arm around him on the first day of high school. Wide grins at the start of this summer, the last time things were okay between you. 
Overwhelmed, he stares up at the ceiling, only realising he’s crying when a hot tear slips from his eyes to tickle his ear. Because Sunghoon likes to upset himself, he screws his eyes shut and thinks about the night before you stopped talking. 
Though he didn’t know it at the time, you’d left Yeonjun’s place to sit with him in a tiny restaurant on campus, the one you’d only visit to toast to each other’s heartbreaks. It had become a ritual — ever since your first year boyfriend dumped you after two weeks — to cry as much as you wanted and drink as much soju as your bodies could handle before stumbling back to your apartments. 
Having spent years suffering from an unrequited crush on his best friend, Sunghoon was always the one to comfort you. But that night was different; you were there to comfort him. It was easy enough to play the part of ‘boy whose crush likes someone else’ because he spent your entire friendship in that role. He’d had no problem accepting his fate, but his composure started to slip when you met Yeonjun. It was the first time you’d dated someone who Sunghoon had reason to be jealous of. In every way, Yeonjun was better than him—taller, funnier, hotter. Sunghoon knew he didn’t stand a chance. He took it personally, you liking Yeonjun instead of him, and let his jealousy consume him from the inside out. 
This jealousy led him to start telling you about Minjeong—lying to you about Minjeong, and his feelings for her. She was a girl from a college out of town that he saw on his Instagram Explore page. He followed her by accident, and by some stroke of luck, she followed back. Sunghoon didn’t really have feelings for her — he didn’t even know her — but she was a girl that you didn’t know, so you wouldn’t be able to meddle. 
It only took a few weeks for Sunghoon to become so upset about your relationship that he couldn’t hide his emotions anymore. So, in a fit of tears, he told you over the phone that things ended badly with Minjeong, and he was in urgent need of a soju ceremony. 
But the night was missing its usual comforts.
It was strange to be the one crying, to see you looking put together and ordering the food. To see you pouring the drinks and raising your glass to propose a toast to ‘Hoonie’s first heartbreak’. You were driving that night, so you only had a tiny sip of soju and let him drink as much as he needed, the way he always did for you, at the same table, in the same restaurant for years. 
Hours later, in your car, you entertained his drunken rambles, though he remembers how your lips were set into a frown that he wanted to kiss away while you gripped the steering wheel like you thought it would run from you. Sunghoon was more drunk than he’d been in a while, drunk enough to let you sling his arm over your shoulders and keep him upright until you reached his flat. 
The voices coming from Yeji’s room disrupt the memory. He’s thankful.
“Your brother’s going through something, so be nice to him this weekend.” His mother’s voice is her version of hushed—a loud whisper. 
Yeji’s response is harder to make out, but he doesn’t miss the way their mum says, “I mean it, missy.” 
A dramatic sigh rumbles through Yeji as she barges into his room without knocking. Sunghoon sits up, feeling an ache in his back and crossing his legs. 
“Mum told me to lay off you today, which is fine, but before I do, I need to tell you something.” 
Yeji pushes the door shut behind her, and the open window makes it slam, both of them flinching from the sudden noise. She pulls her hair out of a silk scrunchie and throws herself on the floor. A pang of irritation forms in his chest, knowing that he could immediately find the empty hanger in his wardrobe where the shirt she’s wearing used to live. 
“I hate you and your perfect golden boy image, Hoon. Would it kill you to fail a class for once? I don’t know how I’m supposed to carry on your legacy.” She’s looking up at him, her chin in her hands and irritation written in the crease between her thick brows. 
It’s impossible to know if it’s because of Yeji’s complete lack of boundaries or the fact that her ‘perfect, golden boy’ big brother is on track to fail three out of three classes and get cut from the hockey team, but Sunghoon immediately bursts into tears. 
“Oh, uh.. I’m sorry?” Yeji offers. “I was kidding if that helps.” 
“I’m alright, it’s okay.” The tears don’t stop stinging his eyes. “Why do you want me to change everything about myself?” 
With a frown, Yeji pours out her frustration and mild resentment. She doesn’t understand how Sunghoon effortlessly conquers every aspect of life while she struggles. Neither do their parents, who had been baffled by her plummeting grades since she moved to boarding school, especially when Sunghoon’s academic performance has only soared since he left for university. The weight of this perceived injustice pulls Sunghoon’s shoulders down with guilt as she talks about the expectations he has inadvertently set for her. 
“But other than that, I’m good.” She shrugs, sitting with her legs out, and leaning back on her palms. “How’s YN?” she asks. It’s clear from the brightness in her voice that she thinks she’s helping. 
Sunghoon cries again. 
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Back on campus, he’s trying to scrape together what’s left of his academic career with the help of two of the smartest guys he knows, and their friend Jay. Though the word ‘friend’ feels a little strong at the moment given the way Jay’s goading him. 
Sunghoon rolls his eyes, sitting back in his seat. “There’s nothing you can do that I can’t,” he says, meaning every word. 
Jay scoffs, shrugging and raising his brow in a way that, over the years, Sunghoon knows to interpret as his ‘about to say something ridiculous’ look. “Pretty sure I could call YN right now, and she’d answer.” 
There’s a pit in Sunghoon’s stomach as Heeseung turns his head in the other direction like he’s been slapped, trembling with stifled laughter. At least Jake doesn’t hide his amusement, throwing his head back in a fit of giggles that draw nasty looks from the other students in the library. Sunghoon doesn’t waste his energy trying to argue because Jay’s right.
Now composed, Heeseung turns back to the table, flipping through some of Sunghoon’s course materials to find whatever his class was doing in class that week. The English Literature class he’s taking — The Modernist Movement: Joyce, Woolf, and Hemingway — is the same class he had to send a million emails over the summer to get enrolled in, but it’s the same one Heeseung aced two years ago. Lucky for him none of the boys seem to be in the mood to make fun of him for trying so hard to have a class in common with you, and then practically failing out of it before the term had started properly.
“This class is, like, beyond easy, dude.” Heeseung pauses to sniffle and twist the stud in his ear. “Everyone in my class aced it. How are you doing so badly already?” 
“I only took it because YN thought it’d be fun if we had a class together, but.. I kind of haven’t been going since we stopped talking.” Sunghoon shrugs, pretending to be unaffected. 
As if the mere mention of your name has some sort of summoning power, like saying Biggie Smalls in the mirror three times, you appear in his eye line, rounding the corner with a furious stride. Your demeanour crumbles when Jay waves at you, and you grin, waving back, but as soon as you look Sunghoon in the eye again, the rage comes back, and you smack a hand on the table when you reach it, leaning over to him. 
“Sunghoon, a word?” you ask.
He thinks you’re asking, but it’s hard to tell with the way you set your jaw afterwards, and the way the warmth of your signature vanilla scent hits him hard. Dazed, Sunghoon lifts a hand, pointing at himself. “Me?” 
“Does anyone else at the table answer to Sunghoon?” 
“Okay,” he says, somewhat pathetically, nudging Jay for laughing at him. 
As slowly as possible, Sunghoon pushes his chair from the table and stands up, following you to the corner of the references section where only anthropology students in scratchy thrift store knits, and Jay, come to check out encyclopaedias by volume. You look good, save for the rage written all over your face—which, honestly, Sunghoon thinks he likes.
Sunghoon isn’t sure what to expect, so he says, “Hey.” He’s being cautious, waiting a moment to gauge your reaction. “What’s gooooood?” His cheeks burn as soon as he closes his mouth around the vowel, but you laugh. You laugh, and it’s beautiful and happy, and you’re laughing because of him—or at him, but he’s glad either way. 
Annoyance quickly clears all traces of amusement on your face. “Were you ever going to tell me we’re spending next week at Mum and Dad’s?” you ask. 
Sunghoon gasps dramatically, clicking his fingers. “I knew there was something I’ve been meaning to do.” 
His attempt at lightening the mood falls flat, and you only nudge his shoulder gently, sighing. “Can you be serious? For once in your life, even for a second, can you please think about how the things you say affect me?” You’re frowning, crossing your arms over your chest and looking at your feet. “It’s not fair, Sunghoon. For you to keep saying things—making plans involving me and then acting like I’m the bad guy when I turn you down.” 
“I don’t think you’re the bad guy at all,” Sunghoon admits. “If anyone is in the wrong, it’s me, I guess.”
You scoff, looking at him like you hate him. “You guess? Are you serious?” You look furious, but you sound hurt and Sunghoon hates it. Hates himself. “I can’t have this conversation with you right now. Tell mum I’m sick, and it’s contagious.” You roll your eyes and walk away, leaving Sunghoon alone with his thoughts and judgemental stares from students in crochet scarves so long they graze the floor. 
He sighs, slumping against the wall. How does he keep getting it wrong with you? 
Back at the table, Sunghoon manages to act like he’s not falling apart and makes some serious headway on his missing assignments with Heeseung’s help before they call it a day as the sun starts to set. 
When he gets home, he lies down on his bedroom floor, spending hours poring over the conversation you had. Over the minute changes in your facial expression, the tone of your voice, and the endless list of things he should have done, rather than watch you walk away. 
The moment feels familiar, both identical to and worlds apart from what happened after you left three months ago. When he managed to scrape the last shreds of his dignity from the kitchen table, he dragged his feet to his room and lay down like he is now, face to the rug. That day, he left his door open and lay so still that Jake thought he was dead. Sunghoon remembers wishing he had been. 
For once in your life, even for a second, can you please think about how the things you say affect me? The words run on a loop in his mind, over and over, until he can’t remember the order of the sentence or where you put emphasis. They’re cutting all the same. 
Sunghoon sighs into the itchy fibres of his black rug before rolling onto his back. In the diminishing purple light of the setting sun. he looks at the walls of his room. At the Fleetwood Mac poster, he stole from Jay when they moved out of their first year dorm, that curls away from the wall towards the ceiling—a diagonal strip of shiny tape being the only indication of the otherwise invisible tear through the face of Stevie Nicks. 
He’s glad when his phone rings, cutting through the quiet, though the sight of your name and the anatomical heart emoji next to it only dampens his spirit. Reluctantly, Sunghoon answers the phone, holding it to his ear. 
“I just got off the phone with Dad..” You trail off. Tangible silence follows, so thick it weighs on his chest. “I’ll go home with you.” 
“You will?” 
“Yes. Goodbye.” 
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Sunghoon reaches your flat at five in the evening. You don’t smile when you open the door for him, nor do you invite him in. Instead, you dump your bag at your feet and he cringes, looking from the floor to you. You’re aggressively beautiful and cosy-looking as you pull a jacket over the sweater you wore that night. Sunghoon’s heart aches in his chest and he wonders if you even realise. Suddenly, the memory of the last thing you said the morning after hits him like a truck: Then let’s not be friends at all. 
A familiar weight lands on his shoulder—your hand. Concern lines your eyes as you ask if he’s okay. 
With a lump in his throat, Sunghoon nods. 
In the discomfort of his car, the two of you sit in silence while he starts the drive home. 
“How’s Yeonjun,” he asks, eyes flicking towards you but regretting it immediately when he sees how you clench your jaw. 
“No,” you say simply, shaking your head. “You don’t get to ask me about him.” 
These are the only words you exchange until Sunghoon stops for petrol. He has enough fuel for the rest of the journey, but he feels like dying and thinks the fresh air might quell his thoughts of running his car off the road. Like always, the two of you get out and head into the kiosk, where he follows you wordlessly through the aisles, watching you debate on snack choices before settling on the same things you always get. Sunghoon pays for your snacks and you roll your eyes but don’t protest, mumbling thanks as you take them into your arms, leading the way back outside.
He knows he needs to tell you before you reach the house, but he’s not entirely sure how to say it—so he just does. “My, uh.. my parents think we’re dating.”
You stop so suddenly in front of him that he almost bumps into you. Stepping around you, Sunghoon keeps walking. 
Over the top of his car, he watches your face cycle through all five stages of grief until anger comes back around in the loop as you scoff. “Why do they think that?” Your face is devoid of expression now, the blankness over your features dragging a sharp chill over his spine. 
He stares blankly at you, processing. “Because I told them we’re dating,” he mumbles. 
“Why did you.. do that?” You tilt your head, eyes pressing shut in a long blink. “What are you even talking about? Why did you.. What?” 
A thin layer of sweat coats his palms despite the cold. Why did he do that? “We can stage a breakup during the trip or say we broke up right now,” Sunghoon offers. “Just one night, YN, please.” 
The wind whistles by, ruffling your hair and jacket that you hug tightly to your chest. Behind you, Sunghoon takes note of the group of girls standing by the pumps, all five of them jerking their heads abruptly when they notice him watching, suddenly finding interest in the scattered litter and flickering halogen bulbs in the steel canopy over their heads. 
You’re staring when he looks back at you, nostrils twitching with a sniffle before you sigh. “Or we could say that you’re a liar and end things there,” you say. “Or better yet, you go down there on your own and tell them the truth.”
Sunghoon’s gaze drops, his thoughts racing in his mind. He knows you’re right. At some point, his parents will have to find out, and it’d be better for them to find out now. Sunghoon sighs, nodding. “Alright,” he concedes. “I’ll take you back.”
An angry laugh comes out of you as you shake your head. “No need, I’ll walk.” 
The station you’re at is neatly nestled in the middle of nowhere, on a road so narrow he’s not even sure it has a pavement. You’re halfway through the three-hour drive, so there’s no telling how long the walk would be, never mind the fact that the sun is already setting and it’s deep enough into October for the wind to sting. 
“From here?” he asks, incredulous. 
“Yes, open the boot so I can get my bag.” 
Sunghoon can only bring himself to say your name, a desperate whisper. 
“Open the boot.”
He repeats your name as if it’ll make a difference, he’s pleading with you, begging—though he doesn’t know for what. 
You go to the back of his car where Sunghoon joins you, a pit in his stomach when you step away. With misty eyes, you look up at him and his heart breaks. “Please.”
Sunghoon knows you well enough to know that you’re not actually going to attempt the walk home but also knows that you won’t back down if he keeps challenging you. He nods, opening the boot for you and getting into the driver’s seat—your move. 
You stand there, unmoving, and long enough passes that he thinks you’ll actually leave. The boot closes softly and you join him in the passenger seat. You sigh, buckling your seatbelt. “Let’s just get this over with.” 
For the rest of the journey, you sit in silence as Sunghoon briefs you on the relationship, fighting a smile as he thinks about being your boyfriend—even if only for a night. You scoff when he ‘reminds’ you that you’ve been together for four months now and the only reason you haven’t been able to come home recently is that your schedules don’t match up very well anymore—which couldn’t be further from the truth as, before term started, you went out to celebrate the fact that your class schedules couldn’t be more suited for seeing each other. 
Finally, at Sunghoon’s childhood home, the two of you smile and laugh for his parents before going to bed. Your relationship has only made his mother more averse to the idea of you sharing a room under her roof than she had been when you were younger. He’s relieved about this, and in the solitude of his bedroom, he lies on the duvet of his twin bed, staring up at the ceiling and thinking about the last few hours. 
With his parents, you’d sat up in the living room watching TV. They sat on the couch together, his mum nestled in his dad’s side, while you two sat on the couch opposite, mirroring their position. If your complete stiffness was anything to go by, you were less than comfortable with his arm around you and Sunghoon felt terrible for begging you to go along with this. It was after midnight when you all went upstairs and you let him kiss your forehead before all but slamming the door to the guest room in his face. His heart twirled and his mum beamed at him before saying goodnight again. 
Now, at 3 a.m. he can’t sleep. Flinching at the knock on his door, he furrows his brows and goes to open it. It’s you. Standing there with your hair scraped away from your face in one of his t-shirts. Your eyes are red, brimmed with tears as you step into his room and sit on his bed. 
He closes the door softly, heart aching at the sight of you so upset, and when he sits next to you, his heart tears apart because you move over, putting a distance between you. It falls out of his chest onto the floor when he realises you’re not wearing your necklace. 
Sunghoon suspected you might have stopped wearing it, it only made sense that if you didn’t want him, you wouldn’t want the necklace he bought for you either, but at least earlier, your sweatshirt sat so high he couldn’t see if you had it on or not. 
It was a gift for your sixteenth birthday, after your first heartbreak. He was so upset and angry that you let some loser hurt you that way, upset and angry that someone could be loved by you and fuck it up. Sunghoon was inspired by Jay, who’d gotten a pretty necklace for his girlfriend, and talked about her cute reaction for weeks, how happy she was to have a piece of him with her all the time. It was a locket, with a picture of Jay in one side and a picture of her in the other so the pictures would kiss when she wore it. 
While at the jewellers with Jake, Sunghoon thought something like that might be a bit much for the two of you and eventually picked out an equally pretty piece with his first initial on it. He wrote a corny note to put in the box, something about how ‘boys come and go but Sunghoon is forever’ and gave it to you with trembling hands a few nights later—it was the first time he ever made you cry. Immediately, he thought he’d done something wrong and was ready to snatch the box and run back to the jewellers (even though he trashed the receipt). You hugged him and told him you loved him. Sunghoon’s been riding that high ever since. 
Until tonight at least. 
“Are you okay?” he whispers. 
“I’ll do it, Hoon.” Your eyes lift from the floor to meet his gaze. “For as long as you need me to, I’ll pretend.”
As soon as the words leave your mouth, Sunghoon feels lighter, an unbearable weight slipping from his shoulders. You haven’t called him ‘Hoon’ in ages, and he can’t tell if you’ve said it out of vulnerability, or even noticed that you’ve said it at all, but it warms his heart nonetheless. However, he’s not fully at ease, still curious about your sudden change of heart and why you’re crying. 
“What happened?”
You pull him into a hug, and his eyes bulge out of his head. “It doesn’t matter,” you say, the words muffled by the skin at the base of his neck. 
For as long as he’s known you, you’ve smelled like vanilla, a sweet warmth that grounds him. Yet it’s only after these months apart that he’s able to put a name to the sensation: home. The realisation of how much he’s missed this feeling, missed you, floods him with a rush of emotion so overwhelming he can’t find the words to press the issue. A moment passes before he remembers to hug you back, his arms finally wrapping around you, pulling you close, and you sink into his hold. Months ago, he would have kissed the top of your head and mumbled reassurance into your hair, but tonight, Sunghoon settles for stroking the back of your head and hopes it’s enough. 
“You can talk to me, you know? You can always talk to me.”
A heavy silence follows, sharp as a dagger—scraping his skin, making the hair on the back of his neck stand on edge and lodging itself between his shoulder blades. Sunghoon’s breath hitches in his throat when you cling onto him even tighter, shifting so close you’ve had to settle in his lap. His heart races in his chest, pounding a rhythm so loud it fills the room. 
Finally, you speak, assuring him that you know and that you’re okay. At this, Sunghoon holds you as tight as he can, and neither of you speaks for the rest of the night. You fall asleep like this, in his arms, so deeply that you don’t even stir when he lies down. 
Rubbing your back, he watches the clock on his nightstand, the piercing green LED digits cycling through two whole hours right before his stinging eyes until you wake up. Sunghoon presses his eyes shut, pretending to be asleep when you kiss his cheek and leave his room. 
For the entire morning, you stay in your room, and although Sunghoon is concerned, he decides not to bother you. In the afternoon, he sits at the dining table with his mum, listening as she talks about work. When she asks him, he gets up to make a cup of tea for her. It’s at that moment when you finally come downstairs, looking so effortlessly pretty. Your hair is still damp from the shower, and you’re bundled up in one of his old sweatshirts. There’s a bright grin on your face that leaves his heart thudding. 
“Baby!” you squeal when you see him, charging towards him and wrapping your arms around him from behind. “Good morning.” Your words are muffled against the back of his t-shirt, and the four-letter word, and the sugar coating it, make his cheeks burn. 
“It’s great to see you too, YN,” his mum says with a smile. “My night was amazing; I slept very well and had no dreams.” 
You let go of Sunghoon and walk over to the table, kissing his mum on the cheek and wishing her a good morning as well. “Sorry, mum, how are you?” 
His mother doesn’t seem to have the heart to correct you either, allowing your 3 p.m. ‘good morning’ to go unnoticed. 
Sunghoon carefully fills both mugs to the brim and, with extra caution, carries them to the table. He places a steaming cup of peppermint tea in front of his mum and a milky coffee in front of you. A warm smile spreads across your face as you mouth a ‘thank you’, and his knees turn to jelly. 
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The next day, after eating an early dinner with his parents at the table, the four of you go out on a walk along the bike path you used to take for school. His parents have gone ahead, not intentionally, but because Sunghoon can’t stop you from dragging your feet. 
As with most things in the town where you grew up, nothing about the trail has changed. The leaves are yellowing in standard form for the season, and crunching under his feet with each step he takes. The only foreign experience is the silence that you’re determined to uphold. Everything Sunghoon says to you is met with either a hum, a nod, or no acknowledgement at all. At this point, he feels like he could drop dead at your side and the most you’d do is step over his body like a fallen branch. 
After letting you go ahead, the weathered slats of the wooden footbridge sag in the middle under his tread. It’s been like this for as long as he can remember and he wonders how nothing has been done about it. The stream rushes under it, loud and unruly, the smell of wet grass both comforting and suffocating as you look over the railing. It’s like something from a postcard, the low-hanging branches sweeping back and forth under the breeze, the grass lush and green around the path, murky water thrashing against the mud and rocks underneath with you in the middle of the frame, peering over the edge.
You keep walking when Sunghoon approaches, leaving him alone on the creaky bridge with nothing but the ache in his chest. He looks up, staring at the grey clouds in the sky through the gaps in the leaves, and sighs. 
Eventually, he catches up with you, grabbing your hand and locking his fingers with yours when his parents slow down. You stiffen, looking up at him with cut eyes and a creased brow. “What are you doing?”
Sunghoon matches your clipped tone. “Holding my girlfriend’s hand.” 
“No one’s looking, boyfriend.”
“You think my parents aren’t going to wonder why we’re lagging behind?” 
A scoff—your fingers remain defiantly stiff. “Do you think your parents are going to care whether or not we’re holding hands?” 
“My mum might after the show you put on yesterday afternoon, baby.” Bitterness covers the word like a blanket, a stark departure from how you said it. 
A long sigh rumbles its way out of you before you fix your lips into a strained grin. “Sorry, sweetheart, this is my first time pretending to be in love.” 
As your words hang in the air, Sunghoon’s emotions brew like a storm within him. Frustration gnaws at his patience. All hopes for a smooth week are dashed, though determination simmers in his chest with a strong resolve to make this work, to fix your relationship. It doesn’t stop the sharp pang of hurt piercing his stomach—he knows you don’t feel the same way, he knows you’re faking, but the word ‘pretending’ hits him like a truck anyway. 
“We held hands all the time when we were friends,” he points out.
Your smile drops immediately, hurt flashing behind your eyes. “Yeah, and now we’re not.” 
If there was a competition for who could hurt Sunghoon’s feelings the most, you’d be a shoo-in for first place. With distinction. 
“Exactly!” he says, feeling the sting of his own words. “Because now we’re dating.”
At the sight of his mum turning around, you switch up in an instant. Lock your fingers with his, wrapping an arm around his bicep, leaning into him, giggling. It’s forced but his parents are far enough away that all that matters is the curve of your lips.
“You two okay back there?” she asks. 
“Perfect! I feel like a kid again!” you call back, beaming up at Sunghoon in a way that makes his stomach flutter even though it doesn’t meet your eyes. 
The two of you don’t talk at all when you get home, with you hugging his parents goodnight and running up the stairs. 
“She’s not feeling too well,” he explains, nodding when his dad tells him to make you some tea. 
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His parents spend the whole day at work, and you spend the whole day following him around like a shadow until the evening when they return. He doesn’t pretend not to like it.
Sunghoon helps you make dinner, turning leftover rice into fried rice with the help of some eggs and vegetables. It’s nice moving around the kitchen with you, watching you scramble eggs in his t-shirt and bump his hip with a playful frown when he eats some of the peppers you’re chopping. 
His parents watch from the table, cooing over the two of you and he does his best to fight the blush forming on his cheeks and neck. Embarrassed, he hugs you from behind, hiding his face in your neck—the scent of your coconut conditioner mixing with your vanilla perfume doesn’t do anything to stop the flush. 
Over a bottle of wine, the four of you eat together at the table, swapping stories about your days. Sunghoon tries to hide his surprise as you lie about the time you spent at the play park by your primary school, competing for height on the swings and spinning on the roundabout until you couldn’t stand up. You grin at him, and it meets your eyes as you hold his hand under the table, and kiss his cheek.
After eating, his parents head upstairs, leaving to clean up together. You hum a song he’s never heard as you load the dishwasher, carefully placing the plates and cutlery in the rack, shaking your head when he hands you the glasses you’d used. 
“Leave ours,” you say. “If you want.” 
Sunghoon nods, putting them back on the table, where you sit in the seat across from the one he was sitting in. He sits too, staying quiet rather than saying the wrong thing. You don’t speak either. It’s reminiscent of the past—the hours you’d spend in the same room, only speaking to share a funny post you’d come across or to ask if you were hungry. 
His eyes track your movements—reaching for the half-empty bottle on the table to pour yourself another glass, filling it to the brim. Before putting it down, you offer him some, filling his glass too when he nods. The three glasses of wine he’s already had must be the reason he wants to reach across the table and hold your hand, run his thumb over the soft skin on the back of it. 
Sunghoon doesn’t know why you’ve been so nice to him all day or why it makes his chest hurt. 
“You know you don’t have to be nice to me when we’re alone, right?” The words come out before he can stop them.
Over the top of your glass, your brows knit together. A sound of confusion, a low hum, comes from your throat as you try to finish your sip. “What?” you ask finally. 
“I only asked you to do this because of my parents, you know? You don’t have to sit or talk with me when they’re not around.” 
Sunghoon’s known you long enough to recognise the look that flashes across your face. The way your eyes narrow and your brows tug together, the little pout that sets on your lips before you speak; you’re hurt.
“Why can’t I just be nice to you because it’s the right thing to do?” 
Because it hurts, is what he wants to say. He wants to cry, to beg you to forget everything he said that day. “Because I don’t want to make you any more uncomfortable than I already have.” Is what he settles for. 
Your face softens. “I don’t feel uncomfortable around you, Hoon. We were best friends for ages, I don’t think you could ever make me uncomfortable.” You pause to take a gulp of wine. “Why can’t I just want to be nice to you?” 
Sunghoon has to chew on his cheek to distract himself from how much your word choice stings. The implications of were and all of your past tense. “I’m sorry,” he says. 
“What for?” 
“Everything.” 
There’s a sadness in the way you run your fingers on the base of your glass. The way you chew on your lip, how your hair falls when you tilt your head and how it moves when you shake it. “It��s not your fault,” you say. “I don’t know anyone who would choose to have unrequited feelings for their best friend.” 
Wow, he thinks. You’re on a roll. Sunghoon wonders if you’re meticulously choosing your phrasing to upset him. Wonders why you feel the need to remind him that his feelings aren’t reciprocated as if he didn’t live through and spend hours reliving the day he confessed. 
“But I didn’t have to tell you about it. It was unfair of me to spring that on you when I knew about Yeonjun.” 
“Did you.. did you think I was going to leave him for you?” 
“Maybe?” Sunghoon chews on his lip—he has no idea what he thought would happen. “I think I thought I loved you enough for both of us, that you might play the part for fun or out of curiosity, and.. I don’t know, just learn to love me.”
“Hoon,” you whisper, frowning. “How could you even think about settling for something like that?” 
Sunghoon shrugs. “It’s not settling if it’s you.” 
Silence takes a seat at the table after he speaks, interrupted only by the ticking clock on the wall—a glittery mess of scrapbooking paper and washi tape layered over each other that Yeji had decorated at summer camp years ago. You’re picking at your fingernails, letting flecks of black polish fall to the table, stark against the varnished oak. 
“I know it’s not my place to ask,” Sunghoon starts after a while, hesitant and only continuing when you nod. “But what did Yeonjun say when you told him? About.. everything?” 
You take a long sip from your glass and sit quietly for so long that he thinks you’re not going to answer him—he doesn’t blame you. 
“I didn’t.” 
He waits for you to elaborate. You don’t. 
Sunghoon nods slowly, deciding not to ask any follow-up questions. Instead, he takes another drink, scrunching his nose at the bitter taste. “He didn’t ask why we stopped hanging out?” he blurts out.
“I told him we fell out but I didn’t say why.” You shrug, but your posture is stiff. 
“Where did you tell him you were going to be this week?” He knows it’s not his business at all, that he’s pushing your boundaries, but he can’t help his curiosity.
“Nowhere.” 
“You told him you were staying on campus?” 
“I didn’t tell him anything.” Your gaze shifts, avoiding his as you toy with the stem of your glass. You drum your nails against it, letting the dull clink ring out. 
“So you just left?” 
“Does it make a difference to you?” 
Sunghoon nods.
For a while, you tug at the drawstrings on your hoodie, pursing your lips to the side, considering this. “Yeonjun and I aren’t together anymore.” Your admission is so shocking that Sunghoon’s jaw drops. He tries to cover his surprise by coughing, his tongue sticking out like a small child. “I didn’t want to say anything because I didn’t want you to think it was because of you.” 
Sunghoon’s thoughts move at lightspeed, too fast for him to catch onto any of them and process this information. His emotions compete with each other—disbelief, guilt, and a painful glimmer of hope he hadn’t dared to acknowledge until now all at the forefront. 
“Was it?” he asks. “Because of me?” 
You scoff—an incredulous sound that doesn’t match the sad look on your face. “I don’t know, Sunghoon. Do you think my boyfriend used me to make his ex jealous because of you?”
He’s not sure what he expected you to say, but this is.. Complete disbelief eclipses him as his heart sinks in his chest, shock, and guilt bubbling in his stomach. 
“I’m sorry,” he says after too long. “That I wasn’t there. That I haven’t been there.” 
“You didn’t know,” you say, gaze softening as you look up at him. 
“But I made you feel like you couldn’t talk to me about it.” 
You shake your head. “I made me feel like I couldn’t talk to you about it. All you did was change the friendship, I’m the one who ended it.”
“I still should’ve been there.” 
“You’re here now, right?” 
Sunghoon nods, earnestly. “Always.” 
Only one thing comes to mind when you repeat the word ‘always’ before taking a sip from your glass, downing its contents. Sunghoon gets up and crosses the room with wobbly steps to open the fridge, where he pulls out as many bottles of soju as he can hold in his hands and puts them down on the table. He goes back to collect some glasses from the cabinet, puts some of the leftover fried rice from dinner into the microwave, and brings it all over when it’s done, with bowls and utensils. You watch him with a fond smile as he opens a bottle and he hopes you think the flush on his cheeks is from all the drinking you’ve been doing. 
“Is it bad that I’ve missed doing this?” You’re grinning now.
Sunghoon shakes his head, raising his glass. “To YN’s fifteenth heartbreak.” 
You grin, clinking the rim of your glass against his. “To YN’s fifteenth heartbreak,” you repeat. 
Both of you down the glasses, and Sunghoon refills them, pouring the soju with an oddly steady hand. As you eat spoonfuls of rice and sip your drinks, silence settles over the room. The soft glow of the kitchen lights forms a warm ambience, a cosy familiarity that brings up simple memories—doing homework together at the table while gossiping about your classmates, the first New Year after you were both eighteen and had your first drink with his parents. 
For at least an hour, the only sounds are the occasional clinks of forks against bowls, glasses hitting the table, the faint hum of the refrigerator and the steady tick of Yeji’s clock. Sunghoon’s eyes meet yours, and he can’t help but notice the slight change in your expression when they do. 
You clear your throat, running a hand through your hair. “This is my sixteenth, actually.” 
“What?” 
You take a small sip of soju, staring down at the table. “My fifteenth heartbreak was losing you. Yeonjun is my sixteenth.”
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In the two days since your soju ceremony, Sunghoon finds himself sinking into the role of your boyfriend like a hot bath. But there’s no use pretending it doesn’t hurt. Pretending it doesn’t hurt when you kiss his cheek before bed, or when you reach out to push the hair out of his face or snuggle into his side on the couch; because it does hurt—a lot. It hurts to think that in three days when you put your bags in the boot of his car, you’ll sit in silence all the way home. When he drops you off at your flat, you’ll close the door in his face and stop talking to him again. These realisations are harder to confront when he’s alone in his room, like now. 
About an hour ago, you asked if you could borrow his car, saying there was something you needed to do on your own. It seemed important, so he handed over his keys with no question. Sighing, Sunghoon gets up from his bed and heads to the shower, where he jerks off to clear his mind. On his way back to his room, he notices the light leaking from the open kitchen door that illuminates the landing. 
He hears the lock on the front door clicking, and stands at the top of the stairs, dripping water onto the carpet while listening attentively. His ears perk up when he hears a gasp—his mother. 
“What’s this for?” she asks. 
“I just..” You trail off. “I know it’s not much, but I wanted to thank you both for always looking after me.” You pause, and Sunghoon holds his breath, waiting. Your voice trembles as you continue. “It’s been hard since my parents went back home, and I guess it was still hard when they were here, but you both supported me. I don’t think I could’ve managed without you guys. I want to make you guys proud, you know? And I’m trying, really, so this is me saying thank you. I’m sorry it took me so long.” 
He grips the railing by the landing, digging his nails into the wood until they start hurting—an ache in his fingertips that makes him wince. 
An odd feeling settles in his stomach, a bittersweetness tinged in his fondness for you, and the gentle shock of realising how much his parents have done for you. Growing up, you became an honorary member of Sunghoon’s family. His parents showered you with gifts during holidays and birthdays, which you often celebrated with them rather than your own family. 
The memory of your parents’ sudden decision to move across the country still lingers, and Sunghoon vividly recalls the tearful conversation he overheard at the top of the stairs. Your parents understood the enormity of their request but had earnestly asked if Sunghoon’s parents could continue looking after you. 
His chest tightens when you start crying. 
“You don’t have to thank us for anything, sweetie. Just you being here and taking care of our boy is more than enough thanks. You never forget our birthdays, and you always come and visit when you can. You’re doing a great job, and you should give yourself some credit,” his dad says, a little choked up. “We’ve always been proud of you.” 
Sunghoon’s eyes sting with tears and his skin gets dry in the spots where the water from the shower is evaporating. He presses his fingers to his closed eyes, forcing a few tears to fall and walks the rest of the way to his room with his eyes shut. He can’t hear anything through his closed bedroom door, which he decides is a good thing as he coats himself in moisturiser and swipes deodorant under his arms with intention to spend the whole night alone. Once he’s dressed, he gets into bed and pretends not to be bothered by the way his wet hair dampens his pillow. Under the duvet, he tosses and turns before sighing and heading to Yeji’s room.
In her absence, the room’s subtle transformation is stark. The sage green-painted walls, once a backdrop to the A3 faces of Wave to Earth and Beabadoobee, now bear the faint imprints of those missing posters. Tiny, shadowy rectangles are the only remnants of the 6x4-sized pictures of her and her friends, of her and Sunghoon, that she took away with her to school.
Her hairdryer is still on her desk where she’d left it for him to use and he sits in her stiff wooden chair, plugging it in. The airflow starts immediately, hot and loud, humming throughout the space as he runs his fingers through his wet hair, feeling cosy under the heat. His shampoo is fresh and soapy scented under his nose, and his reflection watches him in Yeji’s mirror, eyes red and concerned while his hair blows around his head. Sunghoon closes his eyes and finishes his hair, sighing as he lets his worries slip under the whir of the fan. 
Finished, he shuts off the dryer and opens his eyes, flinching at your reflection in the doorway behind him with a soft smile on your face. “Mum and Dad are going to open a bottle of wine if you want to join,” you say, meeting his eyes in the mirror. 
Sunghoon can’t find it in himself to speak, only nodding in response. You smile wider but don’t move. He unplugs the hairdryer and leaves it on the desk where he found it before crossing the room. Without giving himself a chance to think about it, he pulls you into a hug and kisses the top of your head, smiling into your hair when you wrap your arms around his waist, holding him closer. 
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You’re sitting on the edge of the bathtub, mumbling sleepily that you’re never going to drink again, and Sunghoon leans over the sink brushing his teeth, he’s glad you have the decency to cover your mouth as you speak. 
“Brush your teeth and go back to sleep then,” he mumbles around his toothbrush. 
You don’t respond. 
Sunghoon sighs through his nose, spitting foamy toothpaste into the sink, leaving bubbly, blue splatters on the porcelain. “And quit staring at me, I can feel your beady little eyes on the back of my neck and it’s freaking me out.” 
“But you’re so pretty,” you coo. 
There’s a flutter in his stomach and he rinses off the sink and his mouth, buying himself some time. With a hand on the Listerine, he lifts his gaze to meet yours in the mirror and stops short. You’re still staring at him, features soft and glowing under the afternoon light. You look like an angel; a gentle smile spreading over your lips, and a sleepy glint sparkling in your eyes, wide and gorgeous as you watch him. Sunghoon gulps, mumbling his thanks and looking back at himself. He hopes you can’t see the flush on his cheeks. 
“Go back to sleep,” he says. 
“Will you come and lie down with me if I do?” Your voice is a sleepy drawl, coming out in a slow, high-pitched slur, and your eyes are closing on themselves. 
Lying down doesn’t sound like a terrible idea, especially not if it’s with you, so he nods. “If you brush your teeth, then yeah, baby, I’ll lie down with you.” 
You chuckle softly at Sunghoon’s agreement, the sound carrying a mix of exhaustion and genuine amusement, showing no repulsion to him calling you the B-word. He didn’t mean to, it’s been a confusing few days. You nod, saluting to him and getting up to join him by the sink, using your hip to bump him out of the way, but he feels like he’s glued to the spot. 
“Move, baby,” you mumble sleepily, reaching for your toothbrush. “We can cuddle in my bed,” you suggest, to which Sunghoon only nods, taking your words as a cue to unstick his feet from the floor and go to your room, playing the word ‘baby’ on a loop in his head. 
He stands in the doorway staring at your bed, the duvet is all crumpled in the middle, and the pillows are in an L shape at the top corner. He sighs, he can’t go on like this, can’t stand around hoping even a tiny part of you called him ‘baby’ and it meant something for you as it did for him. It’s not fair for him to project his feelings on you like this, but he can’t help it. You’re already pretending for his parents, so would it be so bad to pretend for his sake as well? Even if only until the day after tomorrow when you leave? 
The sound of the bathroom door shutting behind you snaps him out of his thoughts, your bright smile making his heart race when you tug him by the sleeve to your bed where the mattress dips underneath you as you curl into his form, resting your head on his chest and falling asleep. You’ve shared the bed before, countless times, but he knows you’ve only asked him because you’re tired. Because your brain is foggy with drowsiness that clouds your judgement, not because you want him there, not because you miss him when he’s two doors down the hall, tossing and turning at night thinking about you. He wonders absently if you can feel his aching heart beating through his chest, a painful, yet all too familiar rhythm that pulls his own eyes shut, plunging him into a deep sleep too.
It’s dark in the room when he wakes up, the sun already down behind the curtains and the soft yellow of the bedside lamp casting a glow around the space. You’re staring up at him, smiling and you don’t look away when he catches you. “What is it?” he asks, voice thick with sleep. 
“Nothing,” you mumble. “I just missed you.” Sunghoon has no time to respond or even register what you said before you clear your throat, speaking again.  “Come on, dad’s cooking tonight, he’ll need help.” 
Helping Sunghoon’s dad with dinner always looks an awful lot like Sunghoon eating snacks on the kitchen counter and staring at you as you help his dad cook. Tonight is no exception, he’s sitting on the island, and his snack of choice is a family pack of Chilli Heatwave Doritos his mum bought for Yeji. He’ll have to remember to replace them before leaving seeing as he’s reaching the halfway point. 
You go back and forth with his dad about measurements, with you rummaging through the drawers for measuring cups while his dad says it’s best to trust your gut. Reluctantly, you nod, chewing the inside of your cheek as you watch him eyeball the seasoning. 
The gas stove turns the kitchen into an oven, and you complain about it while opening a window, pulling your hoodie over your head and leaving it in Sunghoon’s lap. Time stops when you grin at him, the light from the stove hood illuminating the necklace you’re wearing, his initial resting on your chest and glowing under the light. He chokes around a crisp when he sees it, catching your attention with his coughing. 
“You’ll spoil your dinner, snacking like that, baby,” you scold, using a hand to push his knee. “We’re almost done, I swear.” 
All he can do is nod, cheeks burning as he folds the crisp packet over before putting it back in the bread bin where he found it. 
“Wow,” his dad says, resting his hands on his hips and shaking his head in amusement. “Being in love looks good on him, he’d never have listened if I said that.” 
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It’s already your last day when Sunghoon picks up Yeji from school. She grumbles for the entire half-hour drive and all the way to the front door about why the two of you couldn’t have started the trip today instead of ending it, but all of her irritation dissolves when she sees you in the hallway, leaving the front door wide open to fling her arms around you. You and Yeji exchange compliments for a while — You look so pretty. No, you look so pretty. I love your hair. I love your hair. — as Sunghoon locks the door and watches with a smile.
“God.” Yeji sighs, holding you by the waist and craning her neck up to look at you, as you push some of her hair from her face, pinning back her wispy bangs with the palm of your hand. Yeji giggles. “I’m so happy you two are together, even though I have no idea what a girl like you sees in my loser brother.” 
Sunghoon rolls his eyes, leaning back against the wall. Despite his mild irritation at Yeji’s words, he finds the sight of you with her so adorable his stomach flutters. Over the top of Yeji’s head, you look at him with a fond smile. “He’s not so bad.” 
It doesn’t sound like a compliment, but Sunghoon takes it to heart. 
Like always, Yeji manages to capture your undivided attention and the two of you giggle and whisper with each other all afternoon while Sunghoon watches, too enamoured by the sight to care about being left out. An hour or so passes like this, until his parents get home from work, excited to see Yeji after a few weeks, and you leave her side, coming to cuddle with Sunghoon instead. 
It’s nice being home with everyone, laughing and sharing a meal before his family walks the two of you to his car with at least a month’s worth of cooked food for you to share at university. Yeji makes you pinky promise that she can visit you and waves with a pout on her face until the car is out of view.
Contrary to what he’d been expecting, the drive back is nice. Your playlist is on, and you’re telling him about all the new songs you added, catching him up on things with Chaewon and Yunjin, and all the things you got up to in the time you spent apart. You tell him about a new café that opened up near your place and how you’ll have to go together when he has the time, and Sunghoon bites his tongue before telling you that he always has time for you. The first half of the trip goes on like this but you start dozing off around the halfway mark, your sentences becoming few and far between, eventually turning into half-mumbled thoughts that end prematurely. 
You’re still asleep when he reaches your flat, head propped up against the window with your soft lips parted, looking too pretty and cosy to wake up. Instead, he drives in circles around your block, deciding to wait for you to wake up on your own. It only takes a half-hour but you blink your eyes open, stretching your neck before looking around and out the car window, recognising the street. You don’t say anything, only smiling when you look at him, a small curve of your lips that makes his heart race.
He gets out of the car with you, opening the boot to get your bag before pulling you into his chest for a hug, liking the way your arms settle around his waist. “Thank you,” he mumbles into your hair. 
Sunghoon doesn’t follow you when you take your bag from him, only watching from the back of his car. You don’t notice until you reach the main door, looking over your shoulder and frowning at him. “Aren’t you going to walk me up?” 
The two of you walk in silence up four flights of stairs as the lift in your building is out of order. Your bag feels much heavier in his hand now than it did outside. At your door, he watches you dig around for your keys, sighing with relief when you find them. 
“Do you want to come in?” you ask from your open doorway.
“I—uh—I have training in the morning and I’m already pretty tired, so..” He trails off.
Unfazed, you nod. “Right, of course. I had fun this week.” 
“Yeah, me too.” 
You smile at him, sweet and sincere. “Text me when you get home, yeah?” 
Sunghoon nods, saying goodbye. Out of habit, he doesn’t leave your doorstep until he hears the lock click shut, and walks back to his car with his head down. 
True to his word, he sends you a text to let you know he got back to his place safely and you read it immediately but don’t reply. It’s empty in the apartment, Jake is out with his football team and the space is larger than usual in his absence. Far too tired to even consider going out and joining him, Sunghoon goes through his night routine, putting his phone on the charger and stepping into the shower where he spends entirely too long wishing he could live in this week forever as he scrubs his body. With brushed teeth and damp hair, he goes back into his room where his phone lights up with a notification; a text, from you.
YN🫀: i’m glad you got home okay, i just got into bed :) i don’t want to make you uncomfortable or overstep or anything and you can say no (obviously).. i’ve been missing you so much and didn’t know how to reach out or if you wanted me to but i had soooo much fun this week and spending time with you again made me happy, so i’d like it if we could keep hanging out, like before yk? ik it’s a long shot ahahaha but just say you’ll think about it? 
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hoonie: You’re not overstepping at all, I’ve missed you too, so bad. I had soooo much fun this week as well and I’d like it a lot if we kept hanging out, thank you for agreeing and coming along 😚 If you’re free after Lit tmrw you could come over? Or we could go out and do something, whatever you prefer
hoonie: I missed you so much.. 
hoonie: 🤍
The texts greet you as the first rays of Monday morning light filter into your room, instantly lifting your mood. Your bright smile doesn’t escape Chaewon’s notice as you find her in the kitchen, bathed in the soft light seeping through the sheer curtains. The kettle is boiling with a loud rumble that fills the whole room and leaves her yelling as she speaks to you. 
“Good trip?” she asks, coming over and hugging you. “Never leave me for that long again,” she mumbles into your shirt. 
“It was a week, Wonie,” you say, rolling your eyes even though you missed her too. 
She leans away, looking at you with knitted brows. “It was nine days.” 
“The longest of my life.” 
Chaewon pulls air through her teeth, tilting her head and releasing you. “That bad, huh?” she asks, walking back to her seat at your tiny square table and shooting you a look that tells you to join her. 
During your trip, you gave her nightly updates over text, so you know she knows how much you enjoyed yourself, but you elaborate anyway, sitting across from her. 
“No, not at all,” you say, shaking your head and trying to fight a smile. “I had fun.” As soon as the words leave your mouth, you have to bite your bottom lip to stop the grin curving them; it doesn’t work. 
Chaewon raises a suggestive brow, crossing her arms over her chest. “How much fun?” 
“You’re disgusting.” 
“I didn’t even say anything!” she defends, holding her hands up. “I made an implication. It was only a matter of time, you two have that whole.. lifelong best friends to lifelong lovers thing going on, and it’s hot.” 
“Shut up.” 
“You’re telling me, you spent nine days playing lovers with Sunghoon and you still don’t want him? You’re a lost cause, people would kill for that chance,” she says, tilting her head. “I think I would kill for that chance.” 
“Don’t touch him.”
“Oh?” 
“Jesus, Chaewon, it’s not like that. Hoon’s too sensitive for your roster.” 
“I never said it was like anything, you’re the one who’s dangling me over the ledge for saying I want to fuck your hot best friend.” 
“Sunghoon isn’t hot; he’s..” You find yourself at a loss for words, unsure how to continue your lie. Of course, Sunghoon is hot, you’ve known since you were seventeen and spent the summer at your grandparents’ house, only to come back to find your previously scrawny best friend having ditched his LEGOs for dumbbells. You sigh. “Just leave him alone.”
Chaewon grins, eyes sparkling as she leaves the table. “Okay,” she says in a singsong voice, leaving you and the irritation in your stomach alone in the kitchen.
You sigh, pressing your eyes shut and trying to will away your discomfort. It’s not like Chaewon would actually try anything with Sunghoon. Right? Even if she did, it wouldn’t bother you, nor would it be any of your business. They’re grownups and reserve the right to explore their options. Still, there’s a nagging feeling you can’t shake, an uninvited guest in the back of your mind. 
When you check your phone, you realise you have half an hour before you need to head to campus, so you leave to get ready and text Sunghoon back on the way to your room.
you: sounds good, see u later 🤍
After showering, you stand in front of your wardrobe, towel hanging from your body as you pick an outfit. For some reason, you feel under pressure, picking a pair of jeans that do the most for your ass and a low-cut top that Sunghoon once — drunkenly — said he loved on you.
You have the residual sting of mouthwash on your tongue, and one foot out the door when your phone vibrates in your hand. 
hoonie: Do you want to head to class together? 
you: sure! i’m omw out, where should i get you? 
hoonie: .. I’m outside your building :D 
Breathing a laugh through your nose, you don’t fight the giddy smile on your face as you make your way downstairs to meet Sunghoon. Through the glass in the main door, he’s standing at the edge of the pavement and kicking a stone between his feet. The top of his puffer jacket covers the bottom half of his face, and the draught nips your skin when the door opens. Two girls you vaguely recognise stumble in with smudged makeup and heels in their hands, smiling at you while holding the door to let you out.
“Hey!” you call out, jogging over to him. 
Sunghoon turns around, his head poking out of his jacket to grin at you, holding a travel cup and an abundance of tinfoil in your direction. 
“I wasn’t sure if you’d have eaten anything yet, you don’t normally in the morning,” he says, a sheepish smile spreading over his lips when you take it. “Matcha. Ham and cheese toastie.” 
“Did you make these?” you ask, inspecting the familiar cup and appreciating the warmth it provides. 
He hums, nodding his head.
You ignore the heat spreading over your cheeks and thank him with a hug, grinning when he offers to hold your drink while you eat on the walk. The toastie is still hot, the cheese coming close to burning your tongue as you chew, but you appreciate it wholeheartedly, humming contently with each bite. When you’re done, you shove the foil into your pocket, taking your drink from him and smiling around the sweet taste of a matcha latte as he tells you about his schedule for the day. 
“I’m meeting with Coach after class to talk about my grades, but I’m all yours after that.” 
“Talk about your grades? What’s wrong with your grades?” 
Sunghoon groans, head falling back and highlighting the bump of his Adam’s apple. “My grades are.. I failed my coursework this month, so I have resubmissions during finals, and I think he’ll bench me if I fail again.” 
He sounds like he’s being serious, and if the look on his face is anything to go by, he is. The news creases your brows because for as long as you remember, Sunghoon’s grades were your parents’ favourite point of comparison.
“Really?” you ask. He nods. “What’s up? Is something the matter?” 
A humourless laugh slips out of him before he pulls air through his teeth. “Yeah, my best friend didn’t talk to me for three months.” 
“Oh..” Guilt stirs your stomach as you look up at him. “I’m sorry.”
“I’m not blaming you, it’s not like I was trying to talk and you ignored me.” He nudges your arm with his elbow, giving you a warm smile. “But if you feel as guilty about it as you look, you can tutor me for Lit.” 
“Deal.” 
Sunghoon grins, wrapping his arm over your shoulders and holding you close; the action itself isn’t unusual, but the increased heart rate it brings about is. “You’re too good to me,” he says, holding onto you for the rest of the walk to class.
At his request, you sit with Sunghoon in the back row, watching as the lecture hall gradually fills up in front of you. He seems well-prepared, with his laptop and a small notepad and pen neatly arranged on the desk in front of him.
Throughout the class, your eyes inadvertently track his every move. He diligently types up colour-coded notes, occasionally pausing to write things in his notepad before continuing to type or stopping entirely to listen. There’s something melodic about his actions and the way his fingers run over the keyboard. 
During a five-minute break, you glance at his screen. What you find is more than just lecture content; it’s a document adorned with Sunghoon’s own musings about Hemingway’s style and carefully analysed quotations that go beyond the class discussion.
“How are your notes so good?” 
“I picked up the book over the summer when you mentioned it,” Sunghoon replies with a shrug, a shy smile playing on his lips as he leans back in his seat. “I liked it.” 
A slow nod is your response, though your thoughts swirl like autumn leaves in a breeze. The last time Sunghoon read for leisure, you were in primary school, buddy reading Diary of a Wimpy Kid. But this—this is different. You can’t help but stare at him, awestruck as you take him in. His eyes are wide, shining amber in the sunlight as he pushes some of his hair from his face, frowning when it falls back where it was. 
“Don’t look at me like that,” he mumbles. 
Sunghoon takes a new line in his document and points at the screen where you watch the cursor move through the words he’s typing: I would’ve read and annotated the Bible if you wanted me to..
There’s no time to digest what he wrote or the funny feeling in your chest as you reread it before he deletes the whole sentence, pressing his lips together and looking out the window. Speechless, you stare at his side profile, willing your heart rate to slip back to normal. Steep-sloping nose, plump lips flattened into a line, two points of the triangular mole constellation on his face. Analysis worsens your condition, breath hitching in your throat before stopping entirely. Warmth and trepidation blend within you, fuzzy enough at the edges to seem like one thing—a single force that makes your palm itch with desire, desperation, to reach out and run a finger over his features, feel the bump of the mole on his nose — the most prominent — against your skin. 
You remain this way — silent, watching — even when your lecturer resumes the lesson, and Sunghoon starts typing, writing, and listening again. Polite enough to pretend he doesn’t notice your gaze searing into his face.
After class, and his meeting with Coach, you let Sunghoon lead the conversation and the way to your flat, where you find Chaewon and Yunjin sitting on the couch, whispering to themselves while the two of you study at the coffee table. It’s uncomfortable, an awkward height, too high for the way you’re sitting but you feel calm under the supervision of Chaewon and Yunjin—you won’t do anything to merit teasing in front of them, no matter how badly you want to feel Sunghoon’s face in your hands or stroke his cheekbones with your thumbs. 
To the best of your ability, you answer the questions he has for you—he’d written a ton in his tiny notepad during class, his own concerns clear with each neatly-penned iteration of: How to see actions/dialogue for what they are and not what I want them to be? written in the margins and you try not to feel heartbroken for him.
Three hours have passed by when you walk him to the door, the two of you wrapped up in a bubble so secure you’re surprised to find Chaewon and Yunjin still sitting on the couch. They don’t say anything about Sunghoon in his absence, or the fact he’d given you his sweater when he noticed you were cold. You’re not sure why their silence disappoints you.
Instead, Yunjin asks you about trivial things like dinner while Chaewon sits in silence. 
“What flavour for ice cream?” Yunjin asks, rolling her eyes when you tug on the blanket but not complaining. “And don’t say something ridiculous like mint chocolate, YN.” 
“That happened once! And it was three years ago.. How was I supposed to know you hate fun?” 
Chaewon leans into you, letting you curl your limbs around her from behind as you rest your chin on her shoulder, liking the way her clean scent tickles your nose. 
“Mint-cho isn’t that bad,” she starts. “It’s a little jarring, sure, but it’s kind of sweet. Like watching people come to terms with their feelings for each other.” 
You nod your head, humming in understanding and furrowing your brows when Yunjin scoffs, staring straight at you. Her tone is equal parts cutting and loving, so you know she’s not trying to insult you, but don’t know what she means when she says, “It must be so nice to be as oblivious as you.” 
Yunjin never elaborates, and you never ask, actually feeling the statement’s journey in through one of your ears and out the other when dinner arrives. The three of you share pizza, ice cream, and secrets — the three pillars of 20-something-teenage-girlhood — at the kitchen table, with Chaewon sitting in your lap and picking pepperoni from your slices. 
It’s only hours after Yunijn’s gone home, that her words circle back to you, the statement and all of its weight perching on your chest with all the debilitation and persistence of a sleep paralysis demon.
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“I think I’m getting sick,” you say as soon as she opens her door. “It’s been coming on for a while now, at least a week, maybe more.” 
Unimpressed and exhausted, Yunjin looks down at you through half-closed eyes. “Do you..” She pinches the bridge of her nose, sighing. “Do you have any idea what time it is right now?” 
“Yes. It’s three a.m.” 
“Exactly. See a doctor if you’re sick, I’m going back to sleep.”
“This is an emergen—” Yunjin cuts you off by pinching your lips together. “It’s three in the morning,” she reminds you. “You can’t yell like that in my hallway, come in.” 
You nod, crossing the threshold and taking off your shoes next to hers. “Sorry,” you whisper when the door is closed. 
Using her hand, Yunjin lifts your chin, squinting as her eyes adjust to the light when she flips the switch to inspect your face. “You don’t look or sound sick,” she mutters, flicking the light back off and going to her room. “What are your symptoms? And why did you come here?” 
You don’t have an answer for her last question so you ignore it, following her and tripping over a pair of her shoes in the process. “My cheeks start burning like crazy and my heart races, sometimes it gets hard to breathe.”
“You seem fine to me.” 
A shoulder-slumping sigh slips from your lips. “That’s the thing. I’ll be fine and then Sunghoon shows up with his pretty smile and perfect hair and I feel like I’ve run a marathon.” You know how it sounds, choosing your wording meticulously to let Yunjin be the one to say the words out loud instead of you—it’ll be easier to confront that way. 
From the doorway, you watch as she arches a brow, her interest piqued. “Oh?” 
“I know.” You nod, head bobbing rapidly in furious agreement. “It’s only a matter of time before I cough up a lung and die in his bedroom.”
At your words, Yunjin doesn't reply, only lifting her duvet and getting cosy underneath. You feel like you’re glued to the spot, waiting for her to say something, anything, but nothing comes. All she does is pat the empty spot in her bed. 
“What are you smirking for?” you ask, entering the room properly and closing the door. 
Her response only comes after you’ve taken your jacket and hoodie off, sitting next to her under the covers. “It’s nothing,” she says, laughing. 
“Tell me.” 
Yunjin sighs, resting a hand gently on your shoulder. You think it’s meant to be comforting but it’s the opposite. “You’ll be fine, I promise. Lovesickness isn’t deadly.” 
Feeling the weight of her reassurance, you settle down properly and sigh when your head hits the pillow. Lovesickness. Hmm. 
Closing your eyes, you try to sleep but can’t help tossing and turning as Yunjin snores behind you. You pat blindly around the end table for your phone, grabbing it and wincing at the brightness of your screen. Chewing on your lip, you open Google, looking up ‘lovesickness’ and frowning immediately at the results. Endless negativity fills the screen, terrifying words like ‘unrequited love’ forming a pit in your stomach. There’s nothing negative about what you feel for Sunghoon, nothing unrequited—you think. 
It was obvious during the trip, painfully so. In the way he’d tuck your hair behind your ear when his parents weren’t there to see, or how he slipped up and called you ‘baby’ in the bathroom, blushing when you said it back. You can’t fake something like that.. Can you?
Yeonjun did.
Shaking your head, you open Instagram to distract yourself. Jake’s story comes up first; he’s at a party where Jay is losing a game of beer pong, and at the other end of the table is Sunghoon grinning with a bright red lipstick kiss on his cheek. You lock your phone, using your hands to press on your belly to stop the stirring. 
Oh, you think. Lovesickness. 
When you wake up, the first thing you do is check Jake’s story again. The video is still there and that terrible stir in your stomach churns on, burrowing deeply into a pit of canyon-like proportion—so vast there’s a safety railing lining its edges. 
You eat breakfast in silence with Yunjin, zoning out mid-chew to figure out the origin of these feelings and how to handle them. Suddenly, the moment hits you clear as day, vivid like you’re watching it on a screen—it was your third night at his parents’ house, after your walk. 
You felt bad about how you acted, and what you said, so went straight up to your room. With nothing but the bedside lamp turned on, it was dimly lit, shadows cast on the walls as you sulked, replaying everything in your head. Guilt wrapped its long arms around your body, making you feel sick as you thought about it all. About the hurt etched over his face with every word you said, and the frown that stuck around for the rest of the walk as his hand clung limply to yours. 
There was a knock at the door, so gentle you almost missed it, and Sunghoon was standing there when you pulled it open, chewing on his lip with a mug in his hand. Steam skated over the opening, a rich chocolatey smell hitting your nose but the real kicker was the mug itself. In its place on Jake and Sunghoon’s mug tree, it was unassuming, a regular white mug, but upon meeting hot water, the face of young Sunghoon appeared, grinning with his tiny glasses on. It was a gift from one of his old coaches and though he never used it, it was your absolute favourite cup in the world. 
You felt soft around the edges when you looked up at him, his eyes wide and unsure as you met his gaze—he brought that mug three hours across the country so you could use it again. The thought shifted your heart into a comfortable position, settling in your chest with overwhelming warmth and an increased rate. 
“Hi,” you said, clearing your throat. 
“Hi,” he repeated, holding the mug out for you to take. “It’s still hot so be careful.” 
Nodding, you covered your hands with your sleeves, taking the cup from him and asking if he wanted to come in. Sunghoon nodded, shutting the door behind him and standing by the bed, watching you set the hot chocolate on the bedside table as you sat down. The two of you stayed like that for a while, with him only moving when you patted the spot next to you on the duvet. Your train of thought escaped you as soon as he sat down, the warmth of his familiar fresh, citrusy scent taking over and becoming the only thing you could register. The smell of summers with him, long days at the beach and short nights spent on the couch at random parties, cuddled into his side with his arm over your shoulders. The smell you’d come to associate with comfort and home—with Sunghoon. 
“It’s not fair for me to treat you like shit just because I’m annoyed, I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that earlier. I’m sorry.” 
A crease ran over Sunghoon’s thick brows as they tugged together, he shook his head. “You don’t have to apologise. I roped you into this whole thing and didn’t even try to think about how you would feel. I’m sorry.” His eyes carried a mix of regret and sincerity, mirroring the weight of his words.
“Anyway, I only came to bring you that,” he said, pointing at the cup. “And to check up on you, I’ll get out of your hair for tonight.” Sunghoon wiped his palms on his pants before standing up, reaching behind him to pick up the cloth he brought. For a moment, he stood there, staring down at it in his hand while you thought about telling him to stay, telling him that you wanted him in your hair—whatever that meant. But he spoke before you had the chance. “You left this, at mine, after.. well, you know. I’m sure you left it intentionally, I mean it was folded up perfectly on the end of my bed, so I know you did, but it didn’t feel right keeping it, you always wore it more than me.” 
Sunghoon extended his hand, holding it out to you and you knew exactly what it was as soon as the fabric touched your skin after so long. It was the shirt Jay bought him for Christmas in first year—they were roommates still trying to get a feel for each other. For a few weeks, Sunghoon had been pestering you about what he should get for Jay, saying it didn’t feel right not to get him anything, and you suggested a targeted t-shirt, one you’d been laughing at all day after seeing an ad for it on your timeline. Sunghoon was sceptical, but bought the red shirt anyway, hoping Jay would find BEING DAD IS AN HONOUR, BEING PAPA IS PRICELESS funny. He did. And Jay bought Sunghoon a targeted shirt too, your favourite. It was black and two sizes too big, with I NEVER DREAMED I’D BE A SEXY FIGURE SKATER BUT HERE I AM KILLING IT written over the chest. 
“Goodnight, YN,” Sunghoon said, crossing the room to leave but hesitating before closing the door. He poked his head through the opening and sighed. “I really am sorry.”
That night, you fell asleep in the shirt, the thinning, yet cosy, fabric wrapped around you like a hug as your heart started to beat a new rhythm, one that eerily echoed the five-foot-eleven figure skater who you let break it. 
This morning, Yunjin claps her hands in your face, seeming irritated when you look over at her. “You have class in an hour, what are you doing?” Before you have the chance to speak, realisation covers her face. “Oh, the feelings.” 
You nod solemnly, too caught up in the butterflies raiding your stomach to come up with something to say. 
At lightspeed, you scarf down the rest of your food, apologising for showing up so late as you head out the door. When you get home, you take the fastest shower of your life and feel grateful Chaewon isn’t around to tease you about the smile you can’t wipe from your face thinking about Sunghoon—you’ll text her later.
You run to campus, feeling the brisk autumn wind beating against your face while the rest of your body overheats under your jacket, hoodie and long sleeve. Despite the discomfort and ache in your lungs, you don’t stop until you reach the door of your lecture hall, huffing and puffing into the faces of classmates who don’t take any notice. Of course, in a stroke of pure luck, your lecturer is late, and you realise bitterly, that all of your huffing and puffing was in vain—you would have gotten to class with time to spare even if you walked.
It’s not a total waste though; you use the time to update Chaewon. 
you: i have news wonie..  i like sunghoon
wonie: …………….. fork in the kitchen yn what’s the news? 
wonie: OHHHH news to YOU.. can i call? 
She calls you immediately. You answer without thinking because your lecturer still hasn’t arrived, and there’s no one sitting close enough to hear or notice you taking a call. 
“Are you going to tell him?!” Chaewon’s voice is so loud you wince, pulling the phone away from your ear. 
“I don’t know.” You shrug even though she can’t see you, still holding the device at a distance just in case. “I don’t have any confirmation that he still.. likes me. It’s been a while, and I was pretty mean that day. 
Chaewon groans and you can picture her throwing herself onto her bed, exasperated. The rustling that comes through the receiver only frames the image, hanging it up. “Did you have to tell him to get a grip?” 
“You know..” You trail off, chewing on your bottom lip. “In hindsight, probably not.” 
A beat passes, she’s thinking. “Don’t worry,” she says. “I’ll help you.” 
“I.. have never been so worried in my life.” You sigh, picking at your freshly painted nails. “But I know you’ll do something no matter what I say, so do what you want, Wonie, but please be subtle about it.” 
Chaewon squeals down the phone. “I love youuuuu!” And it’s the last thing she says before kissing the mic a few times and hanging up. 
Slumping in your seat, you don’t have any time to stress about Chaewon’s plans because your lecturer walks in, with a travel cup in her hand and a paperback tucked under her arm. 
She apologises for being late, running a hand through her hair as she announces that you’ll be watching a film, an adaptation of a book you read at the start of term—Ian McEwan’s Atonement. You spend the first hour of the movie falling in and out of sleep until a text comes through from Sunghoon, and sheer excitement keeps you up.
hoonie: Wanna study together after class? 
you: of course!!!!!! 
hoonie: 🤍
The rest of the movie goes by in a drag, and you come away from it with a mild irritation towards Saoirse Ronan.
you: class just finished, heading to lib rn 
hoonie: Shit, still in the locker room, sorry !!! Omw, can you get a table? 
you: i’ll try..
It takes a while but you find an empty booth on the second floor, and set your bag on the plush green seat to take pictures of your surroundings to send to Sunghoon. You sit on the side facing the stairs so he can see you when he arrives. The thought of seeing him makes your heart race and you try out a few natural-seeming poses for when he’s here, cycling between resting your palm under your chin and sitting with your arms crossed a few times until the top of his head comes into view. 
Seeing him knocks the wind out of you as he approaches the staircase, taking them two at a time with his damp hair clinging to his forehead and neck. It doesn’t help that he’s wearing a tight black vest, and his sweats are hanging low on his hips. A breath you didn’t realise you were holding slips out when he lifts his head, spotting you immediately as a grin spreads over his lips and he raises his arm to wave, the veins in his forearm peeking out to say hi too. You can’t tell if it’s his lack of winter wardrobe or your newfound appreciation for him that’s making his biceps look so huge but it’s hard to look away, even when he reaches the table. 
“Are you hot?” you blurt out. 
Sunghoon laughs, raising a brow and something about the way he’s looking down at you makes your cheeks burn. “Depends who’s asking.” He takes his backpack off, leaving it on the table as he sits down, dumping his jacket and hoodie in a pile beside him.
“I’m asking,” you mumble. 
“Then, yeah, I’d hope so.” 
Is he flirting? It sounds like he’s flirting. Flirt back! “Nice arms.” 
He looks down at his biceps for a beat before looking at you warily. “Are you flirting with me?” He can’t fight the smile twitching at the corners of his lips but he tries his best, pressing them into a straight line.
“A little. They are nice though,” you admit.
Sunghoon grins. “Thanks, I’ve had them for a while now.”
You can’t come up with anything to say, too distracted by the way his smile reaches his eyes, lighting up his whole face and forcing a flustered heat to spread over your cheeks and neck. It’s only when you look away from him that you remember what you’re here for. It’s a study date, not a study date—there’s a difference. 
You hand Sunghoon the material you’d printed for him over the weekend, excerpts from texts you’d studied in class, so he can practise close reading and proper citation. As he makes his way through them, you can’t help stealing glances, smiling at the way his tongue sticks out a little while he focuses, or how he twirls his pen in his fingers while he’s thinking. You aren’t making the best use of your time together, copying out the slides from class yesterday, but you can’t help noticing the way he watches you when he thinks you can’t see. The small smile on his face while he does so only flusters you, an odd weakness settling in your knees as your cheeks heat up. 
After a while, Sunghoon sighs, running a hand through his hair. “Could you stop watching me?”
“If you noticed me watching, that means you’re watching me.” 
He shrugs, chewing on his lip. “Well, yeah. I’m always watching you,” he says like it’s a given. “But you don’t normally watch back, it’s distracting.” 
“You’re distracting.”
A playful smile curves his lips as he arches a brow, smugness painting his face. “Am I?” 
Too scared to verbalise your response, you nod slowly, hoping you don’t look as wound up as you feel. 
Sunghoon’s eyes flick over your face, flashing with something you don’t recognise. At least not from him. He sits back in his seat, assessing you and eventually shaking his head. 
“You know,” he says, eyes glowing with something you do recognise: cockiness. “If my sexy arms are getting to you that much, I can always put my hoodie back on. Wouldn’t want my little tutor getting distracted, would I?” 
Oh. 
Your stomach turns with want, mind reeling from his tone and the way his gaze lands on your lips. Sighing, you roll your eyes and try to seem unaffected. “Sunghoon, I never said your arms were sexy.” 
His phone starts to go off, buzzing against the table and he turns it over immediately, screen down on the surface as he shifts his focus back to his work. He chews on his lip while he does, eyes flicking back and forth between his phone and the words on the page. Curious, you lean over the table, elbows propped up as you rest your chin in your hands. He doesn’t spare you or his phone, which vibrates another four times, a glance.
“Are you going to get that?” 
Sunghoon shakes his head. “It’s nothing.” 
You hum, letting just enough curiosity seep into the sound that he’ll elaborate without being asked to. It doesn’t take long for him to deliver.
“It’s just Chaewon,” he says, running his hand through his hair and lifting his head. Sunghoon smiles. “We’ve been texting a lot these days.” 
“Cool.” You nod a few times, aiming for nonchalance but hitting bobblehead as you wait for him to continue. He doesn’t, only humming in response, nodding too. 
After a beat, he picks up his phone, angling it just high enough that you can’t see the screen. He reads the messages, an exhaled laugh coming from his nose as the tips of his ears redden—Fuck. This is worse than you thought. 
Chaewon’s commitment to girl code runs deep—she’s been rebuffing Jake since first year when she overheard a girl she’d never seen before telling her friends she thought he was cute. So you know without having to read the texts that nothing she’s saying is even remotely flirty, you can smell the auto-caps and use of the word ‘buddy’ from across the table. 
What you hadn’t counted on, however, was the potential for Sunghoon’s feelings to shift. If they really have been texting more, can you rule out the possibility that he might like.. her? Chaewon is a catch, beyond a catch, and you’d already turned Sunghoon down. Brutally. Of course, he’d move on, he has moved on. 
The rest of the study session is spent manifesting, writing Park Sunghoon over and over in the back of your notebook. You fill three pages while brainstorming ways to snatch a lock of his hair until he suggests that the two of you call it a day. He walks you home, telling you about how Jake’s been bribing him with food to get a ride to the LEGO store across town for the new Marvel set. 
“With or without the meals, I would’ve taken him, but his ramen is my favourite, so..” Sunghoon says, climbing the last step of your building and holding the door open for you. “He even brought a slice of tiramisu to the rink for me after practice.” 
“You’re terrible,” you say, frowning up at him as you search for your keys. “Do you want to come in?” 
Sunghoon chuckles, shaking his head. “I have a meeting with one of my lecturers soon, I’d have to leave in—” He pauses, rolling up the sleeve of his jacket to check the time. “—eight minutes.” 
“I’m cool with that if you are,” you mumble, suddenly shy. 
A bright smile spreads over his lips and he nods, following you in. 
Chilled by the harsh wind, the only thing on your mind is a hot drink as you lead Sunghoon to the kitchen. He shakes his head when you offer him one, sitting on the countertop and exhaling into his palms before rubbing them together. You can’t help but frown at the sight, feeling guilty that you can’t change the weather to suit him. At your thought process, your brows raise. Wow, you think. Is this who you are? 
You busy yourself with the selection of hot drinks you and Chaewon have accumulated, eyeing each container from top to bottom. A purple tub of Cadbury’s hot chocolate that you’re sure is on the brink of expiration, coffee—sachets of the instant stuff you’ve grown to like since leaving home, Earl grey from one of many brands, or the fancy silk tea bags Chaewon’s mum brought home from a trip—rooibos or plum-apple-cinnamon. 
Craving something sweet, you settle for hot chocolate, pulling the heavy container from the cupboard next to Sunghoon’s head and setting it beside your cup. He’s on his phone, scrolling too fast to take in anything he’s seeing and he shakes his head when you ask if he wants something to drink. 
On the dish rack, Chaewon’s mug catches your eye, so you pick it up to dry it off and put it down next to yours. “I’m going to check if Wonie wants any,” you say, wiping imaginary crumbs from the counter onto the floor. 
Sunghoon only clears his throat, shaking his head. “She’s not home, one of her acrylics popped off so she’s at the shop waiting for a cancellation.” 
The information itself isn’t jarring but hearing it from Sunghoon is. You put on what you hope is a neutral smile and nod, taking milk from the fridge and assembling your drink on autopilot while thinking of ways to redirect the conversation. 
“If you knew you’d have to go back to campus so soon, why’d you walk me home?” you ask, watching your cup spin in the microwave. “I could’ve walked on my own.” 
Sunghoon is already looking at you when you turn your head, his cheeks puffed out with air as he blinks slowly. Because I love you, is what you hope he’ll say. You think you need him to say it. 
“Because you don’t have to do anything on your own when you have me,” he says instead, and it’s infinitely better. 
The words seep through your every fibre, his intonation and lucid affection making a home for themselves in your heart, spreading warmth from head to toe. Your smile becomes a radiant grin, only brightening when he shakes his head, smiling down at his feet. 
Sunghoon hugs you in the kitchen when it’s time for him to leave, his arms holding you tight to his chest as he rocks you back and forth. You inhale his scent, all warm citrus under freshly washed cotton and something exclusive to him.
Wiping the smile from your face feels impossible. You don’t let go when he does, and a sweet laugh — a giggle, you think — tumbles out of him as he mumbles that he really has to go. Still, you cling onto him, taking clumsy steps backwards, with your arms locked around his waist, to your front door, smiling as you watch him put his shoes on. 
“You don’t have to walk me downstairs, honestly,” he says, looking down at you in the doorway.
“I want to.” 
His lips quirk up at the corners, a full smile breaking through and causing your stomach to flutter with so much force you’re sure it’s visible through your shirt. His eyes fall to your lips, lingering, before he clears his throat, looking away. 
“I’ll text you when I get to the door, promise.” 
You lock your pinky with his. “Send a selfie, just so I know it’s you and not someone else using your phone.” 
Sunghoon’s head falls back in a laugh. “Should I just call you? That way you can make sure I get back to uni in one piece.” 
You nod.
“That wasn’t anything with Chaewon earlier, I just needed advice on some girl stuff..” He trails off, searching your eyes. It’s obvious that he’s telling the truth, that he wants you to believe him. You do. “I wasn’t sure if that was something I could talk about with you.” 
Girl stuff. Hmm. You try not to read too much into it and look at the bigger picture instead—your best friend is going through something and doesn’t feel like he can come to you about it.. You squeeze his pinky reassuringly, a flutter in your stomach when he smiles. 
“You can talk to me about anything,” you say, meaning it. 
Sunghoon presses his lips together, humming and unlinking your fingers. “Next time,” he says after a beat, waving at you. 
You shut the door, locking it while watching through the peephole, he leaves as soon as the lock clicks shut. In the kitchen, your hot chocolate is cooling down, and your phone rings in your back pocket. Sunghoon’s calling. 
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Hanging out with Sunghoon. Making sure he sticks to the time-blocked schedule you made for him. Quizzing him on biology terms until he gets restless. If the last two weeks were an episode of Family Feud, those would be the top three answers to the question: Name something YN is doing right now.
Thankfully tonight, it’s the first one. 
You’ve been sitting on the couch for so long, Jake has both left for football practice and arrived from football practice. Conversation ebbs and flows—an hour or so of nonstop talking, followed by another hour or so of comfortable near silence. 
It’s during a quiet hour that Sunghoon sits up straight, clearing his throat before saying, “Let me ask you something. He retreats to the other side of the couch, turning to face you with his whole body. “I don’t want things to be weird after I ask, so no matter what your answer is, I won’t bring it up or ask again.”
Arching a curious brow, you nod. “You can ask me anything,” you say, meaning it.
Sunghoon’s face is impressively blank—minus the motion of sharp teeth worrying plush lip, there’s absolutely nothing behind his eyes that seem to stare right through you. 
Eventually, he asks, “Can I kiss you?” He says more. Big, scary words like for closure and moving on, but they don’t register. They don’t matter. 
Your heart pounds at the base of your throat as you find interest in your hands that sit in your lap. Even without looking at him, you can’t get over the slight crease he had in his brow and the slight tremor in his hands. 
“For closure,” you repeat, though your voice doesn’t sound like it’s coming from you, muffled under the thump of your heart. 
Sunghoon nods. “For closure.” 
A humourless laugh sneaks past your throat as you look at him. You shouldn’t have. In the lamplight, Sunghoon is golden and glorious. Warm light casts one side of his face, diffusing gently over the steep slope of his nose, highlighting his moles and the look in his eyes, gentle and curious all at once. Unwillingly, your gaze falls to his lips, parted, tempting. 
One firm nod of your head brings Sunghoon’s hand to your face, his palm cupping your cheek with soft skin as his thumb traces your cheekbone. You grow anxious under his stare, under the drag of his eyes over your features, taking them one at a time like he’s committing them to memory.
Leaning in, your eyes flutter shut as your lips meet his and he freezes, mouth completely still on yours. Delicately, your tongue traces the seam of his lips, soft and plump, until they part for you, moving with yours. Sunghoon’s kiss is unpolished when it reaches you. It’s hesitant but tender, clumsy but sweet, he’s trying and he’s perfect; your favourite. 
The kiss is.. it’s everything. It’s the racing of your heart, the thudding, the vibrant buzz you can hear, feel humming against your ears. It’s a rush of blood to the head, a lightness all over that pulls you out of your body. It’s Sunghoon’s soft lips curving into a smile against yours, his gentle hold on your face never letting up as he holds you as close as he can manage, and it’s every bit as lovely as the rest of him.
Palpable is the heartbeat of your friendship, beating to a lull under the surface of the kiss, fizzling out into nothing, a steady silence, flatlining to give way to something more, something bigger. 
Every brush of your lips against his is a revelation, a confession. You’re all I’ve ever wanted, you tell him with your kiss. You’re everything I need. His free hand finds yours, locking your fingers and squeezing, the action timed well enough to make you think he hears you, to make you think he’s saying, we’ll be okay, I still love you. 
With that, he pulls away, a delicate tension piercing the air. Blown eyes and laboured breathing—he’s beautiful, fuzzy around the edges with warm orange and all of the love in your heart. Breathless, you chew on your lip, cognisant of Sunghoon’s hand in yours and the sparkle in his eyes as he looks at you. 
Belatedly, you squeeze his hand back, smiling. “Was it everything you ever dreamed of?” you whisper, part teasing, all curious.
Abruptly, Sunghoon stands up, letting go of you in the process. “I have to go.” 
You want to stop him, you think you’re supposed to. To grab him by the arm and kiss him again, to yell in his face that you love him until he understands. But you don’t. Instead, you stay seated, staring at Sunghoon’s back and following him with your eyes out of the room and down the hall until he’s out of sight. 
It’s your first time being so upset after a kiss, and you can’t tell if it’s his leaving or the mention of him moving on that’s tripping you up so much. That’s causing melancholy to crawl from the shadows, sinking its jagged nails into your skin to pull you under. 
You love him. He’s gone. 
Eyes stuck on the doorway, time stretches over the room around you, thick and malleable, wet and cloying—clay stuck under your nails for days as the fire in the kiln rages on. 
Sighing, you get up and wait at his door. You ball your hand into a limp fist, knocking weakly. Sunghoon doesn’t reply. You try again, harder. Still nothing. 
Barging into the room, you find him sitting on the end of his bed with his face in his hands. 
“Don’t move on.” The words come out before you realise and Sunghoon lifts his head, squinting at you. 
“Huh?” He tilts his head, watching closely as you approach him, tipping it back enough to meet your eyes when you stand over him. 
You take a breath, holding it until your head starts to spin. “I don’t want you to love someone else, Sunghoon. Please don’t move on.” 
The stillness that follows is disconcerting, a long quiet you can feel on your skin, amplifying the blank stare on his face as he looks up at you. His eyes flash, a spark of hope behind them so bright it stings to look at.
“Do you..” He trails off, his lips moving to form the next word though stopping short.
“I do,” you whisper, nodding. “I’m sorry for taking so long.”
An exhaled laugh comes from his nose as he grins, shaking his head. “You like me?” he asks, excitement and disbelief fighting for authority over his voice, his hands holding your waist and pulling you down into his lap.
“I love you,” you admit, settling on his thighs. 
“You do?” His eyes are wide and gleaming, searching every feature on your face before settling on your own.
You nod. “So much.” 
Sunghoon’s chin tips up, his lips pressing against yours, excited pecks that can’t turn into much more for the smiles on your faces. You rest your arms on his shoulders, hands clasping behind his head, nervous fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. 
“So.. will you be my boyfriend? For real?” 
Tilting his head, he tries and fails to fight a smile. “I will. I’m a little bummed though.” 
“Why?” You raise a brow, and the word tips up at the end with it. 
“I wanted to be the one to ask you.” Sunghoon’s honesty warms the room, endearing you completely. 
You grin, loving the heat spreading over your cheeks. “Ask me anyway.” 
“Please can I be your boyfriend?” 
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In the weeks that followed, it became immediately clear that boyfriend Sunghoon operated on a pendulum swinging between sexual ferality and terror. He’d get distracted during study sessions at home, finding more interest in biting at your neck than stream-of-consciousness prose, but closed his eyes if a sex scene came on TV. He’d buck his hips against yours while making out but flinch at the sight of condoms in the store.
He wasn’t ready to have sex and didn’t know how to tell you, so you took matters into your own hands, asking if you could wait until after his results for resubmission came in, saying you didn’t want the distraction for either of you. Sunghoon agreed, pecking your cheek and holding you tight to his chest. 
The only thing was that your lecturer hadn’t given him an exact date, so every morning, you held your phone in a vice grip waiting for Sunghoon to update you, and every morning, you got the same text: Nothing today, baby ☹️ 
This morning, you’re brushing your teeth when he texts you, in all caps: NO FUCKING WAY I GOT A 98 !!! LOOK !!!
When the picture comes through, it’s of him in the mirror and you choke on mouthwash at the sight. He’s smiling, bright and beautiful, in a black vest that he’s holding up a little to show his stomach, though his palm is in the way of his toned abs, and it cuts off right at the top of his grey sweatpants. 
Your mouth goes dry as you click on it, fixating on every little detail you can find: the thickness of his fingers against his phone, the dip in his collarbones, the breadth of his shoulders and the cinch of his waist. In a fit of desperation, you try swiping at the bottom of your screen, willing the picture to magically extend. It doesn’t. 
hoonie: Finger slipped.. You like?
you: mm.. 
you: 98??? HOLY SHIT, LOOK AT YOU!!!
hoonie: All you.. do you like the picture?
you: i love it………….
hoonie: My girl 🤍
Another picture comes in, and sure enough, through the glare of his laptop screen, you see: Course name: The Modernist Movement: Joyce, Woolf, and Hemingway. Marks Awarded: 98.0.
you: well done baby !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hoonie: Thx 😁
hoonie: Can I have my prize now ha ha .. haha 😈
you: just for that emoji, no you absolutely cannot.
Your resolve isn’t strong enough when it comes to Sunghoon, because purple devil emoji and all, you show up at his door with condoms in your bag and a bouquet of lilies behind your back. 
The door creaks open and Sunghoon greets you with a grin. “Hey, gorgeous. You proud of me?” 
You beam at him, holding out the flowers. “I’m very proud, Hoon, well done.” 
“I don’t want to ruin the moment,” he starts, taking the bouquet from your hands and sniffing the flowers with an approving smile. “But hearing you say you’re proud of me is awakening something I didn’t know existed.”
“A good something?” 
“Mm,” he hums, arms finding your waist before he pecks your lips. “A very good something.” 
Sunghoon’s words hit your lips and your core, a desperate heat flooding your stomach as he kisses you deeply, his body pressed tightly against yours while he pulls you into his apartment. He kicks the door shut with his foot, slipping his hand under your jacket to settle in your back pocket, not quite squeezing but holding your ass as gently as he can manage. 
He breaks away from you, love in his eyes as he stares down into yours, catching his breath. “I don’t think we own a vase.” 
In his kitchen, you rifle through cupboards to find something to hold the flowers, eventually finding a whiskey decanter in the cupboard under the sink, and holding it up for Sunghoon to see.
“Oh, yeah,” he says. “It’s Jay’s. It’ll work right?” 
You nod, taking it to the sink to rinse it. Sunghoon wraps his arms around you from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder watching you fill the decanter with water and flower food before grabbing the bouquet. He presses open-mouthed kisses to your neck and you struggle to stay focused as you cut down the stems on the flowers, arranging them neatly. 
“Can I take a photo?” he asks when you’re done. 
He’s smiling when you turn around to look at him, a soft curve of his lips that makes your heart race, a deep tenderness in his eyes when you meet them. You smile too. 
“They’re yours, baby, do whatever you want.” 
“A photo of you with the flowers,” he clarifies. 
Warmth settles in your chest, a grin spreading over your lips from ear to ear. You nod, taking the decanter in your hands when he lets go of you, holding the flowers up beside your face and smiling for his camera. As his phone shutter clicks away, you steal glances at his face behind it. He’s watching the screen with a smile, telling you how beautiful you are.
“I want pictures of you too,” you say, handing the flowers over. 
“I’m yours, baby, do whatever you want.” 
Sunghoon poses for your photos, smiling sweetly in some and sniffing the bouquet appreciatively with closed eyes for others. He’s glowing and he’s beautiful and your heart triples in size while taking picture after picture until your phone tells you it has ten percent. 
“Thank you, YN,” he says. “I’ve never gotten flowers before, I love them.” His arms settle around your waist, lips pressing against yours before you have the chance to respond. 
You try anyway, mumbling against his lips that you love him. In response, Sunghoon grins, but the feeling of his cock growing hard against you is distracting, a lust-coated thorn in the side of the butterflies fluttering in your stomach. With locked lips and uncertain steps, the two of you bump into corners and trip over your own feet, stumbling to his room and parting only to tear his hoodie over his head.
Breathless, you pull away, eyes trailing over him and picking up on everything, from the tremble in his hands to the lust-addled worry in his eyes. He’s nervous, you think—though it escapes you, the last word coming out like a question.
Sunghoon scoffs, his hands resting on your waist under your shirt, skin clammy against yours. “Of course, I’m nervous.” 
“You don’t have to be.”
“I just want to be good for you.” 
“Don’t worry about that, let me take care of you, Hoon.” Your palms drag up his torso — firm abs through soft cotton, defined chest over racing heart — to rest on his shoulders. “Sit,” you say when he nods. 
He gulps, taking a seat on the end of his bed under your gentle push, eyes widening when you sink to your knees between his legs and reach for his drawstring, pulling the ends to untie the knot. 
“Wait,” Sunghoon says, breathless, scrunching up his face and dropping his head. “Let me calm down, baby. At this rate, I’ll come just seeing your hand on it.” 
You giggle, resting your head on his thigh and wrapping the drawstring around your finger.
“I’m serious, YN,” he mumbles, laughing as he takes his vest off. “I need a minute.” 
Sunghoon’s eyes are pressed shut as he tries to collect himself, lips pouty and kiss-bitten, slightly parted with ragged breaths slipping out. You wait patiently for him. He’s so pretty like this, with the crease in his brow and the pretty pink flush dusting his cheeks as his chest rises and falls. You can’t help but smile, leaning into his touch when his hand rests on top of your head, his blunt nails grazing your scalp. After a while, he seems more at ease, his eyes finding yours and he smiles shyly, telling you he’s ready now and lifting his hips from the bed to let you pull his sweats and underwear down. 
Free from the constraints of fabric, his cock slaps his stomach with a wet sound as the tip meets his skin, leaving a pearlescent streak over his abs. The sight makes your mouth water and you can’t look away. “Pretty,” you whisper.
Wrapping a hand under his tip, you swipe it with your thumb, taking time to memorise the flutter of his eyelids, the bobbing of his Adam’s apple, and the soft sigh he lets out. You stroke him slowly, liking the way his breath picks up as his brows knit together before you take him in your mouth. It’s a tight fit but you do your best, spurred on by the way he tugs at your hair and stutters through a holy fuck as you take as much of him as you can. 
Sunghoon goes silent, only squirming when you use your hand to stroke him near his base. Self-conscious about his lack of vocal affirmation, you look up at him through your lashes, and the pure bliss on his face is unbearably attractive. His eyes are rolled back under furrowed brows, his mouth hanging open as he throws his head back.
“Am I doing okay?” you ask, using the moment to catch your breath.
He nods, inhaling shakily and screwing his eyes shut while his hips buck up into your fist. “I’m.. You’re doing such a good job, baby, so good.”
Satisfaction courses through you from the praise, a high that dulls the ache in your jaw. Still watching him, you massage his balls in your palm, pressing open-mouthed kisses to his tip when he whines. You tongue at his slit until he thrusts back into your mouth, tip hitting your throat, and he gasps when you gag, his arm coming up to cover his eyes. A belated apology slips from his lips, mumbled as he strokes your hair with a shaking hand and goes quiet again. When you speed up, his breath stutters, the muscles in his thighs contracting around your head as you suck and lick and drool on his cock. 
A moan of your name, and his hand holding your hand down, are the only warnings you get before Sunghoon comes, spilling his load right down your throat. Whining, his hips buck up against your face, pushing further and further until he falls back onto the mattress.
Your throat is hoarse and aches while you use the back of your hand to wipe at your lips, enjoying what’s left of his taste on your tongue. Deep red tints his neck and chest, a pretty flush gleaming under the sheen of sweat on his skin. He’s mesmerising, as he tries for air through swollen lips and looks up at you through squinted eyes. He reaches for you, cute grabby hands tugging your shirt and pulling you down so you’re lying next to him with your head on his chest. 
“You’re amazing, baby, so good for me,” Sunghoon whispers, eyes fluttering shut as you drag your nails over his torso, feeling the subtle heave of the slick, sculpted muscle over his stomach and chest. 
Pride heats your chest, satisfaction rolling over you like a wave. “Really?”
He hums in affirmation, nodding his head. 
“You were so quiet, I couldn’t really tell,” you add, hungry for more praise. 
“The walls are so thin in here, I just got used to being quiet,” Sunghoon says, frowning. Hand meeting your chin, he tips your head up towards him, pressing a soft kiss to your lips and mumbling, “I’m sorry. You were perfect, I swear.” 
It’s a sweet kiss. Until lips move harder and hands get lower, desperate as he thumbs the top of your leggings, palm unmoving but a dangerous heat blooms in your stomach anyway.
“Can I..” Sunghoon pinches you softly through the material, unsure eyes boring deep into yours. 
You nod. “You can.” 
Slipping under your waistband, his fingers skate across your skin dipping between your thighs. He grazes your slit, satisfaction clear in the groan he lets out as he feels the wetness there, pulling it over the length of your slit to cover your clit. Your breath hitches, a strangled gasp, pleasure and surprise meeting in your throat under the pressure of his thumb on your clit, the gentle sting of his finger pushing into you. 
What Sunghoon lacks in experience, he makes up for with the sheer length and thickness of his fingers. It’s almost jarring, it’s enough to force your eyes closed and bring a sigh rumbling out of you, ache and relief settling between your legs, where he curls a finger against your walls and drags slow circles over your clit. 
“Can you take these off, baby?” he asks, hand away to touch your leggings. 
You don’t waste a second, sitting up to pull them off, throwing them and your underwear across the room. Sunghoon licks his lips, tugging at the hem of your shirt. 
“And this? If you want..” 
You nod, pulling it off immediately to let it join the rest of your clothes in a heap on the floor. The way he gulps is a confidence boost, his dilated pupils taking in every inch of your body, though his gaze always pulls back to your bra—white and lacy, thin enough for your nipples to push through the fabric and Sunghoon can’t seem to get enough, though he waits until you’re lying down again to touch you. 
Sunghoon props himself up on his elbow, leaning over you. “You’re beautiful,” he whispers, dragging a finger over the lace at the top of your bra, toying with the material and the little bow sitting between your breasts. His eyes flick up to meet yours. “So beautiful,” he repeats. 
Hiding your face in his chest, you mumble, “Thank you,” into his skin while trying to ignore the heat spreading over your body wherever he touches you. His hand trails from your arm to your waist, resting on your hips to slip over your ass for a beat, where he grabs and squeezes the flesh there before coming back around to slot between your legs—you lift one of them, resting it over his body, and he’s smiling sweetly when you look up at him.
Sunghoon’s movements are unchanging, though the sensation is heightened by the unbridled desire in his lidded eyes that urges white heat to lick over every inch of your skin—this time he pushes two fingers into you.
It doesn’t get better than this, you think. But it does, quickly. 
Leaning over you, his eyes flick across your face, one feature at a time as he chews on his lip. Reaching up, you push some of his hair from his face, holding it back and saying, “Relax, baby.” 
“Don’t want to hurt you.”
Moving your hand, you blink when his hair flops back over his forehead, tickling your eyelashes. His eyes are focused now, staring straight down into yours, want and worry flashing behind them. 
“You won’t, I promise,” you say, locking your pinky with his, feeling relieved when he smiles.
Sunghoon pushes in slowly, his name slipping from your lips when he exhales shakily, head falling forward. The sting, the pleasure, make it hard to breathe, molten desire taking hold of your lungs as he carves out a place for himself as far as you’ll take him, all the way to the hilt as slow as he can manage. 
A moan tears out of him, lewd and whiny as his hair tickles your collarbone, head falling into the crook of your neck. His skin is hot and damp against yours, his breath burning your shoulder as he tries to calm down. It’s difficult to register much else, tethered only by the sound of his voice when he asks, “Am I hurting you?” 
“Hoon,” you whisper. 
“Can you look at me, baby?” He lifts his head, resting a hand on your cheek. You blink your eyes open, gaze locking with his, where concern pushes through his desire. “Am I hurting you?” he asks again. “Are you okay?” 
You nod. “I’m okay, just..” You sigh. “Full. Need a minute.” 
Sunghoon kisses you, lips moving gently with yours, passing breathy whines between your mouths until you feel yourself relaxing. Pulling his plush bottom lip between yours, you suck on it, nodding. “Want you to move, baby,” you mumble. 
He scans your face, eyes meeting yours as he pulls his hips back. He’s slow, so slow with his thrusts that your belly turns with want, your fingernails sink into the taut skin of his back, and jagged sobs fall out of you with each drag of his cock along your walls. 
Everywhere his skin touches yours is set ablaze with scorching heat, goosebumps pushing past the surface as his breath fans your neck and his sharp teeth graze your skin. He bites hard enough to sting, and you wince as his tongue flicks over your bitten flesh to soothe you.
You were so worked up earlier, writhing against the sheets and coming undone in his palm, so bliss quickly pushes through the ache between your legs. “Good, Hoon, feels so good,” you manage, struggling to convey how perfect it is.
“Just want to make you feel good.” His words melt into each other, vowels soft and elongated as they curl around each other. He’s working up a steady rhythm, his tip consistently nudging you where you need it—the spot that makes the room blur around you. “That’s all I want.” 
Before long, the knot in your stomach pulls you up from the mattress, arching your back towards the ceiling. Mouth to mouth, chest to chest—it’s the closest you’ve ever felt to someone else, the closest you’ve ever been. The thought alone knocks the wind out of you, and his persistent whining does nothing to help.
Your want and adoration for Sunghoon run bone-deep, inching up your spine and creeping over your shoulders, intertwined with an all-consuming pleasure that turns the heat in your stomach molten as a shudder zips through you. Even though you can’t find the words to let him know, he lifts your hips from the bed to fuck you deeper, harder, into the mattress until shaky orgasms pull both of you under. 
You let him fall into you, fingers curling around his hair, whispering I love you into the skin of his neck as he comes, most of his weight on top of you while you catch your breath, relishing in the fullness you feel as the last waves of your high pull back. You stay like this for as long as he needs, his head coming up from the crook of your neck to smile at you before pressing his lips to yours. A sleepy haze fills the room around you, tongue swiping tongue as you giggle happily into his mouth. 
After a while, he gets up, tying the condom to throw it away and comes back with his shirt. He uses it to clean up—gentle between your legs, pressing kisses to your calves while he does. Sunghoon’s tenderness wraps around your heart, and love clouds your vision, forming a blurry trail that follows all of his movements, glowing like something from a dream, ethereal, an apparition. 
The bed dips beside you, his arms around you, pulling you in so his chin rests on your head. You push your cheek into his chest, hoping the two of you will meld into one—the thought makes you warm all over, a fuzziness that reaches every part of your body while he presses kisses into your hair, rubbing your back. 
“I love you,” he says, voice as soft as the rest of him. “I’m glad I exist.”
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mama park: Hi lovely 😍 missing you lots, wondering when you’ll be home for Xmas………..love ma
Sunghoon stirs, nose scrunching as he snores softly into the quiet of a winter morning. His chest rises and falls steadily under your head and he doesn’t move when you sit up. The lamp on his desk is still on — neither of you could be bothered getting up to turn it off last night — and under its dim glow, you admire him. Perfect lips gently curved—long lashes kissing the skin under his eyes. 
Love hits you from all angles, warmth all over from head to toe despite the chill in Sunghoon’s room. You can’t help but grin, leaning up to nose along the underside of his chin, his natural scent so soft yet dizzying as you nuzzle into him. He stirs again, turning his head this way and that before resting, you feel a bit bad, deciding to leave him be and text his mum back. 
you: hi mum !!! missing you sooooooo much :((( will be home asap
mama park: BTW Sunghoon told me everything. I raised such good actors LOL make sure he looks after you and keeps you happy!
you: i’m so sorry we lied to you..
you: but i’m really happy with him and he loves me a lot
you: i love him so much .. never been so sure of anyone in my life
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© zreamy (2023), all rights reserved. do not repost, translate, or plagiarise my work. do let my know your thoughts !
permanent taglist: @asahicore
4K notes · View notes
astonmartinii · 8 months
Text
peas in a pod | oscar piastri social media au
pairing: oscar piastri x fem!russell!reader
y/n and george russell may be twins, but they’re hardly two peas in a pod and oscar is just there for the ride
MASTERLIST | TIPS
yourusername
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liked by georgerussell63, oscarpiastri and 602,344 others
tagged: oscarpiastri
yourusername: are you alex’s appendix cause you make me wanna bust 😩
view all comments
user1: excuse me 😀
user2: sometimes i’m like yeah george and y/n are defo twins and then she says shit like this and i’m like they can’t be related
alexalbon: erm what is is ?
yourusername: gosh so other people can use your appendicitis for a seat but i can’t use it to appreciate my boyf - PC gone crazy
alexalbon: the only censorship you’ll need is when my foot is up your ass
yourusername: i’d love to see you try i’ll put you back in the hospital
alexalbon: you say that but when i woke up in hospital you were crying your eyes out begging me to never do that again 🤨
yourusername: i was CHANNELLING GEORGE OBVIOUSLY
oscarpiastri: she cried about it for a good week after alex dw she loves you really
yourusername: TURNCOAT say goodbye to your bedtime privileges
georgerussell63: okay we’ll stop right there, y/n is sorry for joking about your appendicitis alex, and y/n we will not be discussing extracurricular activities with oscar. thank you.
user3: what about the people who want to hear about the extracurriculars? and maybe want to … see them?
yourusername: @oscarpiastri how do you think mclaren would feel about an onlyfans?
oscarpiastri: i think it’ll be a hard no
yourusername: ugh boring
user4: y/n talking about an onlyfans whereas i don’t believe george has even seen a naked woman
oscarpiastri: i love you and your dumb fucking pick up lines
yourusername: what do you mean i’m literally the reincarnation of william shakespeare?
georgerussell63: more like e l james
yourusername: i knew it was you who stole my copy of 50 shades GIVE IT BACK
yourusername: anyhow … i love you too babe x
user5: every comment section we learn new y/n russell lore and it shocks me everytime
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oscarpiastri
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liked by landonorris, yourusername and 734,513 others
tagged: yourusername
oscarpiastri: in this house i guess we celebrate hit tweets? happy one year anniversary to the alpine breakup
view all comments
user6: CAKE SCARED ME FOR A SEC I WON'T LIE
yourusername: i think the technical term is “stunting on these hoes”
oscarpiastri: for pr reasons i will not be agreeing
yourusername: @ otmar HE BROKE I’M UP
oscarpiastri: you’re going to get me into even more trouble than that tweet did
yourusername: blame me and tell them to meet me in the car park, no weapons just fists
oscarpiastri: maybe let’s not
yourusername: you don’t wanna be my sexy ring girl? :(
georgerussell63: one day of not threatening people is all i ask for
yourusername: you weren’t saying that when i beat that year 13 guy’s ass in year ten for picking on you 🤨
georgerussell63: well yes but needs must
oscarpiastri: sorry george i’m siding with y/n she’s not afraid to tell the waiter they got my order wrong
landonorris: and she can square up to the people who won’t leave us alone in clubs
georgerussell63: okay i get it damn
yourusername: SMASH
alexalbon: you can’t let anything be normal can you?
yourusername: since you wanna be in my business… lily is a smash too
alexalbon: excuse me?
yourusername: let it be known if i weren’t already with the love of my life, id steal your girl
lilymunhe: oh wow … umm ☺️😳
alexalbon: OSCAR DO SOMETHING
oscarpiastri: idk bro im focusing on being called the love of y/n’s life
user7: silly season was so boring this year thank the lord we have y/n to cause chaos
georgerussell63: do not encourage her
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yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, oscarpiastri and 823,410 others
tagged: oscarpiastri
yourusername: you think i look bad, you should see the other girl. don’t touch men without their consent - and definitely don’t touch my man or you will be dealt with. trust.
view all comments
user8: someone leaked the video and omg that girl has hands
user9: she did NAWT hold back omg
oscarpiastri: i love you, thank you for defending my honour
yourusername: i love you too, i’d protect you with my life but don’t get it twisted, i’d throw hands for anyone
oscarpiastri: no but for real i’m very thankful for you standing up for me
user10: why is everyone praising this? all this shows me is that piastri is a pussy that needs his gross girlfriend to stand up for him?
yourusername: i’m going to stop you right there. that girl thought she could touch a man without his consent, and it’s completely out of order. so she was handed the consequences. oscar couldn’t do anything so it fell into my hands. you are the problem, do not talk down to him or other victims in those situations.
georgerussell63: as much as i joke, im glad you and oscar have each other.
yourusername: thank you georgie
oscarpiastri: thanks george, but your sister is the real knight in shining armour here
yourusername: i'll always save you princess 👸
alexalbon: everyone is being very sentimental but YO I KNEW YOU SAID YOU HAD HANDS BUT DAMN
user11: alex spill how brutal was it?
alexalbon: i had a front seat and it was like prime anthony joshua she was NOT playing
yourusername: oh wow that’s a big statement
alexalbon: i don’t wanna sound unprofessional but it was honestly crazy and i am so impressed y/n should really consider combat sports
yourusername: in my defence she just fully turned in on my fist
georgerussell63: okay normal service resumed she's making fun of me again :(
user12: why are we celebrating violence?
user13: people have no respect for the drivers these days, just because you’re in the same club as them does not mean that you’re entitled to harass them ??? you fuck around you’re going to find out… esp when y/n is around LOL
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oscarpiastri
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liked by georgerussell63, yourusername and 1,023,444 others
tagged: yourusername
oscarpiastri: so a lot has happened. i don't want to give the girl any more attention. i love my girlfriend and i love how much she loves me. cry more.
view all comments
user14: OOP HE GAGGED THE HOES
georgerussell63: "cry more" y/n has clearly been rubbing off on you
yourusername: i can assure you i've done much more than just rub off on him
georgerussell63: NO NO STOP RIGHT THERE MISSY
oscarpiastri: to be fair you walked right into that one george
georgerussell63: introducing you two really is the stupidest thing i've ever done
oscarpiastri: first of all, arthur introduced us months before you "introduced us", second of all, this is a lot coming from the guy who cried to me about how i'm so great for your sister and can't wait to have me as a brother-in-law
yourusername: AWWW GEORGIE YOU SOFTIE
georgerussell63: yes i am soft. i love love. sue me gosh.
user15: they are so aesthetically pleasing to my eyes
landonorris: so does like y/n wanna give self defence classes?
yourusername: for a price, soz nothing comes for free in this economy
danielricciardo: please can you do classes? i wanna harness your rabid chihuahua energy
yourusername: i am NOT. a chihuahua take that back daniel
oscarpiastri: she's more like a kangaroo, cute but will steal your dog and beat your ass
yourusername: true, i just wanna put you in my pouch
yourusername: that sounds weird, but i just wanna hold you and never let go
danielricciardo: okay i was just messing around no need to be disgustingly cute
logansargeant: i'm glad you're both okay, but that room service debrief went so hard
oscarpiastri: honestly if i weren't holding an ice pack to my girlfriend's face it would've been top two
yourusername: eh i think it's still top two, nothing is unseating when we were next door to lando shagging and we made it a drinking game 😭
landonorris: WHAT ????
oscarpiastri: no comment
logansargeant: no comment
yourusername: it was drink every time you moaned impressively loud 👍
landonorris: no comment
alexalbon
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liked by oscarpiastri, yourusername and 822,304 others
tagged: yourusername, oscarpiastri, lilymunhe
alexalbon: idc you can never get me to hate her ass if you poke the bear expect to get bitten
view all comments
user16: sorry to the galex truthers but y/n and alex are the superior friendship
yourusername: i knew you loved me + and i knew you loved oscar SEND ME THE LAST PIC NEW LOCKSCREEN INCOMING
alexalbon: i've been the personal photographer for both russells for years and i'm only just being appreciated
yourusername: HOLD ON i take just as many of you and lily
alexalbon: well that's easier because we're much easier to photograph
oscarpiastri: WOAH hold your horses pal, call me ugly all you want but one shall not dishonour y/n
alexalbon: okay someone spent the break at the russell house
yourusername: HE'S NOT UGLY YOU POOL NOODLE TAKE IT BACK
alexalbon: damn it's a tough crowd. and on a post literally appreciating you
yourusername: bare minimum
user17: okay the kardashians are over - netflix can we please get a drive to survive spin off about y/n, george, oscar and alex ????
landonorris: lando norris erasure
charles_leclerc: charles leclerc erasure
oscarpiastri: move over twitch quartet, there's a new sheriff in town
landonorris: okay i'm banning y/n from mclaren you've spent too much time with her and now a rookie is bullying me :(
yourusername: he ate you up... i'm so proud
landonorris: is this the environment the russells promote? @georgerussell63
georgerussell63: you're on your own on this one lando i gave up years ago
yourusername: @oscarpiastri i think that's called maximising our joint slay
oscarpiastri: they wish they were us for real
user18: i love watching a black cat gf slowly corrupt her golden retriever bf
yourusername: oscar is like an evil little kitten really
oscarpiastri: and you love it
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note: quick one cause i'm in my feelings. enjoy this random oscar cuteness he is an aussie queen (also a friend of mine literally went to the same school as him it's so weird)
4K notes · View notes
chrolloluvr · 3 months
Note
Adam, Mammon, Alastor and Lucifer with a insecure S/o
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💋ྀིྀིAdam, Mammon, Alastor, Stolas and Lucifer w/ Insecure S/O 💋ྀིྀི
Note: Yesss i love this request!! As somebody who is insecure about quite a few things I think this is so cute <3 🥰 Also I hope you don't mind me adding Stolas <3
Female!reader, GenderNeutral!Reader for Stolas <3
Warnings: Cussing, mentions of sex
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Mammon 💸:
He does not grasp the concept of insecure. Why be insecure when your with him? He chose you, right? He is extremely picky, so what is there to worry about? Why are you insecure? To him you are adorable, so who cares?
He may notice you are feeling down lately, or that you have been avoiding him, which agitates him to no end.
So at first, he will have you bottle up your insecurity, just so that he can be your big savior, and make you feel loved by him.
When you tell him exactly what you are insecure about, he audibly laughs. Well, he doesn't mean to make you upset or anything, but like, are you being serious?
He will say things like:
"Babe, what the fack? you look hot, theres no need to beat around the goddamn bush."
"What, is it your (insert insecurity)? cmon, don't be such a sour puss. You look just fine to me."
"Cmon sweets, whats on ya mind? How about we go out to the restaurant you love, yeah?"
He will go to that restaurant, even though he hates it. He just does not like seeing his little trophy upset or visibly irked. Even if there is Paparazzi around, he will hide them from you, or bribe them to leave.
His favorite insecurity on you would have to be your thighs. He loves squeezing them, jiggling them, putting his head between them, seeing them move when you walk, etc. If you have bigger ones, he thinks that one of, if not the best physical quality about you. He will spend his time ranting to you while snug in your legs about how annoying his newest stars are, or how Ozzie did this, or Fizzarolli did that-
Overall, he will make sure you dont go on with that contentious bullshit ever again. He cant have his favorite little lady upset, can he?
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Adam 𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪:
He is Adam, the first man, he does not ever feel insecure. he never makes mistakes.
But in reality, he has felt insecure. Especially after his two wives left him for the. same. man.
He does not notice until a while later that you are upset. He thinks you are happy all the time because of him. But he's basically your husband, so he will notice things about you, that you don't even know about yourself (same as mammon)
When you tell him you are insecure, he coddles you, and threats you like you're an infant
He will say things like:
"Your insecure? About what? You have to be lying babe, you look perfect to me."
"Relax babe, im kidding, so its your (insert insecurity)? Oh, are you joking?"
"How about... you and me do a little something something, hm?"
(He is a sex deviant, so he will always bring that up.)
He tries to make it up to you by putting on your favorite movie, and bringing you your favorite snacks. But he ends up eating most of them himself...
But anyways, his favorite insecurity is your ass. He likes squeezing it, spanking it, etc. Even if it small, he likes it and thinks its cute. He will randomly pick you up and throw you over his shoulder and just, spank it, and put you down??
So overall, he is okay at comforting you, but dont come running to him unless you dont want things to turn somehow sexual.
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Alastor 🎶:
He has never felt insecure in his twisted mind.
He will notice immediately that you are upset about something. He takes action fairly quickly, by rubbing your shoulders, etc.
When you tell him you are insecure, he is very understanding. You are his dearest, so he wants to take care of you, and make you feel like an angel.
While he may not understand insecurity himself, he understands you are disarmed, and that bothers him greatly.
He will say things like:
"My love, don't fret about these regal thoughts. What are you feeling down about now?"
"Is this about your (insert insecurity)? If so, that is silly nonsense, my dear. You know I do not mind."
"How about, we take a stroll. Maybe we could stop by Rosie, she sure knows how to cheer you up, hm?"
He tries his best to make you feel better, because your feelings reflect on him. While it may not seem so on the outside, his heart tears when he sees you like this.
His favorite insecurity has to be your hip dips. He thinks they make you look very feminine and womanlike, which he likes. He likes to run his hands over them, enjoying the way his fingers sink into them.
So overall, Alastor makes you feel very loved and cared for. You will never feel discontent as long as he is in your vicinity.
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Lucifer 𓆩𓆪:
He has felt insecure a lot. From being casted down into Hell, to his wife somewhat recently leaving him, (to his height), he knows what it feels like
But since meeting you, he is very attentive over you.
So he notices very quickly that you are upset.
When the time comes to tell him that you are insecure, (because he kept asking you frantically whats wrong), He is very understanding.
He will say things like:
"Seriously? You? Insecure? Well we cant have that here, now can we?"
"Its your (insert insecurity)? Its ok honey, I love you just how you are."
"Honey, how about the two of us stay home for the day, hm?"
He will stay by your side a lot more often now that you told him that. He is a very doting and worried lover like Stolas, so he wants you to feel comfortable with yourself.
His favorite insecurity of your is also your thighs. Big or small, he loves them. His favorite is when his head and cheeks are squished against them. Or when he's eating you out, and he feels the warmth smothering his face. He loves the way they move when you walk as well like Mammon.
So overall, he knows what it is like to be insecure. He wants you to feel loved, and like you are cherished by him.
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Stolas 𓅪:
Feels insecure a lot like Lucifer. WIth his (ex)wife, concerning his daughter, etc.
He also will notice your changes instantly. SO he will constantly ask if something is wrong. When it comes to you being upset, he will be very combative in telling him.
So when you tell him you are insecure, he feels for you. He will hold you close, and let you lay on top of his fluffy, feathered body.
He will say things like:
"Sweetheart, what is troubling you so much? I am always by your side, you know. So if you want to talk, we can."
"Your (insert insecurity)? But they are beautiful! You don't have to worry my owlette."
"How about we watch a movie? That always seems to cheer you up."
He is very concerned about you, and just wants to make you happy. That is his duty in his mind. If he cant make the rest of his family happy, he can surely make you happy, right?
His favorite insecurity of yours is stretch marks. He likes them, and he thinks they look like cute little tiger cub stripes. He will run his slender fingers over them, making you shiver in the process. He believes they are like pieces of art, just all over your body.
So in his mind, you are perfect. He is always going to love you, insecurity through and through. You are his lover.
1K notes · View notes
love-belle · 11 months
Text
good riddance !!!
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ in which their post break-up era is them pretending that they weren't each other's everything.
or
for when you're too hurt to regret anything. ˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚
social media au // daniel ricciardo x fem!reader
warnings - language
author's note - hello!!! i hope u like this one!!! thank u so much for reading, i love you <3 just a note, that i will probably not be posting next week bc i have exams but i will be active here so ! if u message me, i'll probably reply, i hope so anyways lol <3
≡;- ꒰ °twitter ꒱
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≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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liked by landonorris, lilymhe, carmenmmundt and 779,617 others
yourusername taylor was so right when she said "oh my love is a lie" bc fr love IS a lie
7,927 comments
username she gets it
username oh this speaks VOLUMES
username bestie u should've just tagged him at this point
username i will never be getting over them u don't get it they were my PARENTS
username girl is heartbroken but still slaying
*liked by yourusername*
username i miss u and danny so much 💔💔💔💔💔💔
lilymhe kids remember to drink rat poison before you fall in love because it never works out!!!
-> yourusername so true gf
-> alex_albon ???
-> lilymhe no babe look away
-> username poor alex omg 💀💀💀
username TAYLOR SWIFT ALWAYS RIGHT
*liked by yourusername*
username im a child of divorce what the fuck
username hits different ://///
username the highkey shade 😭😭😭
landonorris we miss you!!!
-> maxverstappen1 who's we
-> yourusername i will steal jimmy and sassy again don't test me maximus
-> maxverstappen1 for fuck's sake that's NOT my full name
-> yourusername ok maximus.
-> username OH THANK FUCK 🙏🙏🙏 i genuinely thought her friendship with everyone would be all fucked up but im so happy to see this ❤️❤️❤️
-> username they're so precious to me
username missing daniel is the comments simping for her 💔💔💔
username "love exists bc u exist for me" IM CRYING WHAT THR CUCK
-> username how'd we go from THAT to this.
georgerussell63 your hobbies include calling me and carmen at 3 in the morning just to say bonjour in weird accents and then hang up
-> yourusername idk abt u but carmen loves me doing that
-> carmenmmundt can confirm 😘
username nah bc what'd daniel do so bad that y/n started doing STUFF
-> username IM SAYING LIKE 😭😭😭
username missing her in the paddock sm omg ://
username praying she's at the next race 🙏🙏🙏
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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liked by lewishamilton, carlossainz55, pierregasly and 782,526 others
danielricciardo good riddance.
8,626 comments
username PAUSE
username reverse whatcthebfuck
username daniel babe what.
username no bc if i was y/n i would cry maybe that's just my sensitive ass
-> username definitely not just u bc i would SOB
username OH MY GOD
landonorris don't act like i can't hear you singing sad songs to yourself
-> danielricciardo LEAVE ME ALONE
username nah bc what the fucj
username i don't like it one bit 🫤🫤🫤🫤🫤
username NOT MY PARENTS FIGHTING
username love is not real bc if they didn't work out then there's absolutely no hope for me
username i feel so bad :////
charles_leclerc you're lying
-> danielricciardo no i'm not
-> charles_leclerc yes you are, i can see you wipe away your tears
-> danielricciardo STOP EXPOSING ME
-> username PLEASE OH MY GOD
username "good riddance" what if this was my last straw.
username i know he's gasping for air rn knowing he lost a bad bitch like y/n
username ahahahahaha!!! im so okay!!!!!!! just fine!!!!!!! idc abt this!!!!!!!! (im losing my mind)
username someone take away y/n's phone before she sees this PLEASE
username my heart's breaking wtf
username remember when daniel and y/n posted about each other with WHOLESOME captions??????? good times
-> username those were the highlights of my entire week like ://
-> username i miss my mom and dad sm 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔
maxverstappen1 nice
*liked by danielricciardo*
username i know max is maaaaaaaaaaad
username the f1 gc is blowing up as we speak rn
-> username real like y/n is like their baby sister 😭😭😭
≡;- ꒰ °text messages ꒱
kelly's bf 👎 - max ; cat stealer ❌ - y/n
cat stealer ❌ : max
kelly's bf 👎 : what
cat stealer ❌ : is kelly with u
kelly's bf 👎 : she's out with p
kelly's bf 👎 : what happened
cat stealer ❌ : just wanted to talk to her
cat stealer ❌ : it's okay, just tell her to give me a call whenever she's back :) tell sweet p i love her and i miss her sm
kelly's bf 👎 : will do
seen 1m ago
kelly's bf 👎 : hey you okay?
kelly's bf 👎 : i saw what daniel posted
kelly's bf 👎 : it's a shit move just saying
kelly's bf 👎 : he's stupid
cat stealer ❌ : yeah idc lol
cat stealer ❌ : "good riddance" ok boy u literally begged me to make it work
cat stealer ❌ : i'm sorry ik he's ur best friend
kelly's bf 👎 : yeah but so are you
cat stealer ❌ : WOAHHH PAUSE
cat stealer ❌ : max being nice for a change?????
cat stealer ❌ : history was made
kelly's bf 👎 : don't make me take it back
kelly's bf 👎 : but yeah
kelly's bf 👎 : don't pay any attention to him, yeah? i'm sure kelly will have a few choice words for him at the next race, along with me. and p probably, she loves her aunt y/n
kelly's bf 👎 : speaking of that, you're coming to the next race right?
cat stealer ❌ : i love u all :// thank u
cat stealer ❌ : and no, i don't think it's a good idea
kelly's bf 👎 : are you sure? you can stay inside the whole time, he won't even see you
cat stealer ❌ : i'll think abt it, im just very overwhelmed rn that's all
kelly's bf 👎 : that's very understandable tbh
cat stealer ❌ : max
kelly's bf 👎 : y/n
cat stealer ❌ : can i ask u something
kelly's bf 👎 : if this is about letting you and kelly give me a makeover, it's no
cat stealer ❌ : we'll convince u someday but that's not what i wanted to ask
kelly's bf 👎 : what is it?
cat stealer ❌ : do u think daniel ever loved me
cat stealer ❌ : like at all???
kelly's bf 👎 : y/n
kelly's bf 👎 : of course he did
kelly's bf 👎 : you were his everything
cat stealer ❌ : then why was it so easy for him to walk out and then say "good riddance"
cat stealer ❌ : he took the easy way out
kelly's bf 👎 : he's a stupid asshole that's all
kelly's bf 👎 : but he truly did love you, he still does. i know i complained a lot, but with the way he spoke of you, like you were truly his everything. it was such a happy site, seeing my two best friends in love
cat stealer ❌ : u called me best friend twice omg
cat stealer ❌ : that's a record
kelly's bf 👎 : shut up
kelly's bf 👎 : my point is
cat stealer ❌ : i need to post something so W
cat stealer ❌ : brb
cat stealer ❌ : kelly's calling me
kelly's bf 👎 : so i was just a placeholder till my girlfriend arrived?
cat stealer ❌ : aw look at u using ur brain
kelly's bf 👎 : this is why daniel broke up with you
cat stealer ❌ : TOO SOON
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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liked by carmenmmundt, lilymhe, charles_leclerc and 736,826 others
yourusername me looking for my last fuck to give
7,927 comments
username SLAYED
username ATE SO HARD OMG
username MOTHER
username i love her sm omg
username she's winning the idgaf war
kellypiquet pretty girl 🤍
*liked by yourusername*
username IM IN LOVE WOAHHHH
username she gagged him y'all
username I LOVE HER SM
username gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf gf
maxverstappen1 👍
-> yourusername 👎
-> maxverstappen1 okay fuck you i was trying to be nice
username HER
username iconic
username exes beefing omg 💀💀💀
lilymhe SLAYED
*liked by yourusername*
lilymhe IN LOVE
*liked by yourusername*
lilymhe on my knees pls marry me
-> yourusername let's go bb i'll get u a ring
-> alex_albon oh
-> lilymhe babe LOOK AWAY
username two artworks in one frame
-> yourusername pls i love u 😭😭😭
username MOTHER IS MOTHERING
username i know he's shaking rn
username no bc the way my jaw dropped and the way i gasped why are u so pretty beautiful gorgeous angelic ethereal breathtaking hot fine amazing
username I WENT TO HEAVEN OMG
username just one chance please
charles_leclerc as lando taught me "slayed the house down 🔥🔥🔥"
-> yourusername PLEASE IM HONOURED
username i adore her friendship with the grid 🫶🏼
username ahsuidsjgsjsjsksisjajsdh
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly, landonorris and 796,415 others
danielricciardo ignorance doesn't suit you
comments are disabled for this post
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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yourusername honey everything suits me ❤️
tagged danielricciardo
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formulafics · 6 months
Text
★ THE JPG CHRONICLES | PART 4
Scenario: in which the grid and fan favorite mclaren reserve driver opens a jpg account, but it isn’t what was expected. this time around, yn ln finally reveals who her boyfriend is.
Pairing: f1 grid x fem!reader
A/N: guys, we’ve made it to the last part of the jpg chronicles. i just want to thank everyone who’s followed along with this and i hope you enjoy 🫶🏻 also paying homage to the pink and orange theme since all of the other parts use that!
PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3
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yn.jpg
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liked by logansargeant, landonorris, oscarpiastri, mclaren, and 245,678 others
yn.jpg VEGAS BABY ‼️ mom (my pr manager) said i can’t say what i want to say about the race. she also said if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all…so anyways vegas is pretty cool race aside 🥰
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yn.jpg shoutout to @/logansargeant for his first appearance on this account!
⤷ logansargeant thank you yn
⤷ yn.jpg your welcome!!
landonorris caption is real
norrisnation yn speaking for the lando girlies (gn) once again
rizzciardo LMFAO REFERRING TO YOUR PR MANAGER AS MOM
⤷ yn.jpg she is mother
alphatauritaurialpha yn this isn’t a bf reveal :/
⤷ yn.jpg babe i promise the bf reveal is coming. i have plans for it
⤷ piastrispastry YOU GOT CALLED BABE BY YN YOU WIN AT LIFE
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racing.news
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liked by ynln.official, pierregasly, landonorris, snd 56,782 others
racing.news sources say yn ln is ‘in trouble’ with mclaren team principal due to her second instagram account where she is notorious for posting funny pictures of her coworkers.
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norrisnation so this is why she’s delaying the bf reveal
ynln.official HELP???? IM NOT IN TROUBLE WHAT 😭
mickshumacher @/ynln.official 😳
⤷ ynln.official mick do not feed into this madness you’re better than that
⤷ sunnyshumacher mick and yn may not be dating but i love their friendship so much LMAO
landonorris im crying this is so funny
⤷ ynln.official of course you’re here
mclaren can’t take her anywhere 🫣
⤷ ynln.official ENOUGH
rizzciardo YN IN THE COMMENTS IS SENDING ME THIS IS SO FUNNY
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yn.jpg and yukitsunoda0511
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liked by landonorris, yukitsunoda0511, maxverstappen1, pierregasly, fernandoalo_official, and 367,891 others
yn.jpg home is wherever he is. ❤️
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yukitsunoda0511 i love you ❤️
⤷ yn.jpg I LOVE YOU
landonorris the day has finally come 🙏🏻
⤷ yn.jpg stfu
fernandoalo_official 👍
⤷ yn.jpg dad approved. thank you nando
norrisnation ARE WE OFFICIALLY GETTING THE BF REVEAL? IS THIS THE REVEAL? IM GOING INSANE
yukitauri WAR IS OVER
yukitauri MY BABIES IM SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW
yukitauri ALSO MY PARENTS ‼️ MY PARENTS ONLY BC YALL ARE HATERS
yukitauri THROWING UP RIPPING MY HAIR OUT YN IT IS A DAMN TUESDAY YOU CANT DO THIS TO ME RIGHT NOW
rizzciardo i expect an increase in content of them. i need it
formulatsunoda ykw i’ll be so honest i did NOT expect it to be yuki but im not mad 🤭
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yn.jpg
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liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, logansargeant, alex_albon, yukitsunoda0511 and 354,672 others
yn.jpg back to our regularly scheduled program 😼
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yn.jpg i am @/fernandoalo_official btw and he is @/ynln.official. he’s just a silly teenage-ish girl
⤷ dreamyalbon YN PLEASE WHAT 😭
⤷ fernandolandoland okay but her relationship with fernando is so wholesome she rlly is his grid child
alex_albon nurse, she’s out again
⤷ yn.jpg 🤺
maxfewtrell this account is my roman empire
⤷ oscarpiastri same mate
maxsupermax we are so back
yukitauri idk about yall but i won’t be moving on from the bf reveal that is my home
yn.jpg @/schecoperez not commenting = hater 😿
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thank you for reading! all feedback is appreciated — dae <3
GENERAL TAGLIST | @renarots @jsjcue @treehouse-mouse @lovstappen @illicitverstappen @minkyungseokie @arkhammaid @vroomvroomverstappen @vellicora @stopeatread @topguncultleader @cixrosie @leclercvsx @motorsp0rt @piasstrisblog @lokietro @spidersophie
JPG TAGLIST | @dl-yum @youdontknowmeshh @lighttsoutlewis @kodzuvk @sofs16 @raevyng @p4st3lst4rs @1655clean @judespoision @evans-dejong @leireggsworld @landosgirlxoxo @3joracha @lanando4 @toasttt11 @gaslysainz @sadg3 @scenesofobx @leilanixx @zaynzierulez @flippingmyshit @goldenharrysworld @celesteblack08 @thatoneembarrasingmoment @willowpains @coolio2195 @bey0ndne0 @sheslikeacurse @sadg3 @biitch-with-wifi @torchbearerkyle @plutotcles @cherry-piee (more tags in comments + some would allow me to tag 💔)
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hallietblr · 11 months
Text
my favourite birthday girl | j.fisher x reader
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request: i would like to request can it be where jere and i are best friends and its my bday belly and conrad throw a surprise bday party for me at the becks beach house and jeremiah & i go upstairs and we go in his bedroom he confesses that he liked me since last summer and i have my first time with jere trying different sex positions like hes on top of me and im on top of him riding him & doing cowgirl style position lots of kissing can it be smut/angst and is it okay if i include my name and if not you can do y/n thanks babe❤️❤️❤️❤️🫶🏻🥰
a/n: i fricking LOVE this!! i had so much fun writing it and i hope you all enjoy!
warnings: SMUT (minors DNI), oral (fem! receiving), swearing, alcohol consumption, and jeremiah being a total sweetheart
the sun was shining brightly through the windows of my bedroom, the morning breeze coming through smelling of sea salt. i flutter my eyes open, taking in the warmth of the summer. i reach for my phone that was charging by my bed side. the moment the lockscreen wakes, it’s full of birthday messages.
i feel myself smile as i go through the individual texts from all my friends back home in maine. i respond to them all, thanking each of them for the kind and loving messages.
after doing so, i finally decide that it’s time for me to get out of bed. i stretch out the slumber from my body before crawling out of the warm bed. i grab my phone and my bluetooth speaker and head over to my bathroom to start my birthday right.
cruel summer by taylor swift starts playing loudly as i pull off my pajamas, which was in reality one of jeremiah’s old t-shirts. i decide to text my friends to see what the plans were for the day, assuming they had something in mind.
SUMMER GANG☀️🌊🫶
y/n!
goodmorning guys!! what are the plans for today?
stevie:
con and i are going fishing at the pier today
belly <3:
i told my mom that i’ll go to the store with her today!! sorry girl!
y/n!:
that’s fine haha have fun! tell laur i said hi:)
j:
i should be available today i think
connie:
i thought ur coming fishing?
stevie:
yeah!! boys trip!!
belly <3:
wow i’ve nvr seen us all so busy lol
j:
wdym it’s a regular day
connie:
nvm mom says u need to clean ur room jere
stevie:
LOL
belly <3:
so true, it’s gross jeremiah
j:
shut upp
urs isn’t any better bells
belly <3:
:(
y/n!:
stop being mean j
i close my phone, a bit disappointed that it appeared that all my friends forgot about my birthday. i try to shake it off and assume that they’re all busy, so remembering a birthday isn’t that big of a deal.
i step into my shower, washing my hair with my coconut shampoo and conditioner, lathering my body with body wash, and shaving every inch of my body. i sing to taylor swift as i shower, feeling my muscles relax in the warm water. i dry myself off with a towel and pull on a cute purple summer dress that i had gotten earlier last week.
after putting on some makeup and doing my hair, i figured that i was ready to go downstairs to see my family. at least they would remember my birthday.
you only turn seventeen once, plus laurel, susannah, and my mom always told me that seventeen is an amazing year.
my mom was preparing my favourite smoothie bowl when i got to the kitchen. her face lit up after seeing me turn the corner and a smile drawn up her face, “happy birthday, my babygirl!” she exclaimed, pulling me into a tight embrace.
i hug her back, “thank you, momma!”
she hands me the beautiful smoothie bowl, “here you go, sugar! let me go get you your presents!”
my mom scurries away to her office before returning with multiple gifts all wrapped up in colourful gift wrap. she places them on the kitchen island before sitting down beside me.
i was already half way done my breakfast when my dad and baby sister came into the kitchen.
“happy seventeenth, babydoll” my dad grins, planting a kiss on my forehead, “i can’t believe how grown up you are already.”
“happy birthday sissy!” my four year old sister yells, hugging my leg. i ruffle her hair, thanking the both of them.
my mom urges me to open up the presents, she had always been a huge gift giver — seeing people’s reactions were her favourite thing. i open the sealed boxes, revealing lululemon clothing, a new ipad, gorgeous jewelry, and some makeup products that i’ve been wanting to get.
“mom!” i exclaim, in shock of the overwhelming amount of gifts, “you didn’t have to!”
“oh, honey,” she coos, brushing my hair, “it’s your seventeenth birthday! of course i had to, do you like them?”
i look at her with my mouth opened agape, “yes, yes! of course i love them all! you know me so well, thank you!”
my arms wrap around my mom, squeezing her tight.
“my first baby,” she whispers into my ear so my sister, lindsay, doesn’t hear her, “i love you with my whole heart.”
i finish up the rest of my breakfast, while also admiring my new items. my dad also takes a few photos of us, most likely to post on his facebook page later. luckily, i look decent right now.
“eat up,” my dad says to me, “your friends are probably waiting for you.”
i shrug, “they’re all busy today.”
my mom turns to me with a raised eyebrow, “seriously? do you want me to call susannah?”
i shake my head quickly, “no! it’s alright, really.”
“i’m sorry, baby” my dad squeezes my shoulder, “you can hang out with us today.”
i give him a small smile, “that sounds good.”
the rest of the day was uneventful, well not exactly. it was moreso just a typical day for us. my sister and i went swimming in our pool, i watched tv with my parents, and scrolled through my phone a ton. i really didn’t want to confront my friends about them forgetting my birthday, it would’ve been immature was what i told myself. it’s not like i’m six anymore.
i was laying on my bed when i received a text message.
j:
heyy pretty
wanna come over? we just came back from fishing 🎣
y/n!:
sure :)
j:
awesome! see you soon!!
also wear something nice ;)
y/n!:
why?
j:
not that you don’t always look nice!!!
my mom wants to take photos or smt lol
y/n!:
oooook
my brows furrow in slight confusion of the request but i shrug it off. i get up from my laying position and go to my closet to find something ‘nice’. i find a black satin slip dress that i brought from back home, i figured this would be nice enough. i put it on and look at myself in front of my mirror.
i smooth down the material of the dress, checking how it looks from the side and from behind. i silently pray that jeremiah would like it, i’ve overheard him, conrad, and steven talk about how jeremiah is an ass man multiple times — considering how the satin material of the dress perfectly fits my bum, i’m convinced he’ll appreciate it.
i grab my phone, sunglasses, and my favourite lip gloss before heading downstairs. i see my parents cuddled up on the couch, watching a movie together with my sister fast asleep in the space next to them.
i slide on my white converse and head over to them, “i’m going over to the fishers.” i tell them. they smile and remind me to have fun and to be home by two am.
the walk over to the fisher summer home is brief, a quick five minute walk. them living only two houses over from mine always came in handy. i open up the front door before my vision became black.
“do you trust me?” he says, jeremiah’s hands clamped over my eyes.
“if you ruin my mascara, j, i might cry.” i joke, “yes, i do trust you.”
“okay, good.” i can hear his infamous smile in his voice, “come with me.”
he guides me slowly through the house, his hands still over my eyes. jeremiah lifts them off and it takes me a moment before noticing all the decorations put up around the kitchen. there are streamers hanging from the walls and across the ceilings, so many pretty balloons in every corner of the room, a huge ‘happy birthday’ sign hanging on the cupboards.
my hand flyes to clamp over my open mouth, “oh my god!”
steven, belly, laurel, susannah, and conrad all jump up from their hiding spot behind the kitchen island.
“surprise!” they all scream out. i smile widely, taking in everything,
“you guys!” i gush, as im being pulled into a hug from jeremiah, “thank you!”
his muscular arms hold me and he plants two kisses on my hair, “did you really think we forgot your birthday, pretty girl?”
i laugh, “well maybe! you guys are forgetful sometimes… like the time you forgot belly and i at the walmart!”
he rolls his eyes playfully, “oh shush, that was one time!”
“we never forget birthdays here.” susannah giggles before also hugging me, “happy birthday my gorgeous and beaming girl.”
everyone takes their turn in hugging me and wishing me a happy birthday. i thank each of them individually, the smile never leaving my face once.
“who planned this?” i ask laurel, who was carefully pulling out the birthday cake from the fridge.
“it was all belly and connie’s idea” she smiles, “now go sit!”
i take my seat next to jeremiah and steven before laurel brings the cake with seventeen candles on it in front of me. they all sing happy birthday to me and i close my eyes to make a wish.
every year since i was five years old, my birthday wish has been the same. not even just for my birthday, anytime i saw a shooting star, or tossed a penny in a fountain, or honestly any other occasion that required making a wish — it has always been the same.
it was wishing for jeremiah to notice me in the same way that i see him. it’s all i’ve ever wanted, as stupid as it can get.
i blow out all the candles and susannah cuts up the cake into slices before serving it to everyone. belly reminds me of all the birthday presents that they had gotten me, and to open it later.
after cake, susannah and laurel agree to leave the home to go to a cocktail bar so that the kids can have the house to themselves for a few hours. more teenagers from cousins start showing up, all of them wishing me a happy birthday as they come in.
drinks are being served, music is playing loudly off the multiple speakers scatter around the home, beer pong matches are being played by the pool, people dancing.
jeremiah stays next to me for the whole night, we chat with a few of our friends while sipping our seltzers.
“do you wanna go upstairs for a bit?” jeremiah says to me in a hushed tone, “y’know, to get away from this?”
i nod, “yeah, for sure.”
he smiles, taking my hand into his own and guiding me through the crowd and up the stairs. we walk to his bedroom, he closes the door behind me and locks it. jeremiah places his drink on his dresser and offers to put mine next to it, i agree and soon we’re both seated on his bed.
we make small talk, him asking about my birthday so far as he rummages around in his desk drawer. he sits back down beside me, facing me. he places a small velvet box into my hands,
“open it, my favourite birthday girl.” he smirks, looking into my eyes. his hand was on my thigh and i can feel myself blushing.
i think i can get lost in his ocean eyes, they’re so beautiful and full of life. i smile and carefully open it, inside was a gorgeous golden ring with a large (what im assuming was a fake) diamond on it.
“j…” i gasp, lifting the ring out of its box and admiring it, “this must have costed a fortune.”
he shrugs, “anything for you, look on the band.”
i bring the ring closer to my eyes and see that there’s an engraving on the inside of the band.
in love with my best friend <3
my jaw drops, “jeremiah?”
i look up at him, our eyes interlocking. he slowly nods, “i love you, y/n — i’ve always have, i thought it was a childhood crush and i don’t think i really realized until last summer that i truly do love you.”
“can i?” he asks, taking the ring from my hand. i nod and he carefully slips it onto my finger before being it to his lips and kissing it.
i pull him into a kiss, my hands rested on his cheeks and his on my waist. he kissed back almost immediately. my hands move down to his built chest and gently push him down onto his back, our lips never leaving each others. i adjust my legs so im straddled on him,
“i’ve always loved you too.” i whisper against his lips, he smiles into the kiss and kisses me harder.
his fingers fiddle with the edge of my dress, hands sliding up and down the back of my thighs before squeezing my ass slowly, “god, i couldn’t take my eyes off of you in this dress. it makes your body look so fucking good.” jeremiah groans.
i lower my crotch onto the evident tent in his pants, he gasps at the contact while slowly grind my hips on his.
“fuck, you’re gonna make me come in my pants.” he moans into my ear as i flip my hair onto one side. i bring my face to his jawline, kissing it and licking the soft skin. his hands tighten around my ass and i moan at the contact.
his hand slips under my dress and to the lace material of my thong, his finger slide underneath the band of it. he lifts it before letting it go, the snap of my underwear against my skin making me moan louder.
“sit on my face,” he tells me in a low voice, i feel myself getting even more wet and excited at the tone of it, “let me give you another birthday gift.”
he lifts me by the waist and moves me so my core is hovering above his mouth. i grab onto his head board while jeremiah slowly moves the lace material to the side and lowers me onto his face.
i gasp loudly when his tongue licks a long stride between my folds. he moans into me, “fuck, you’re so wet for me, baby.” he mumbles against me, the vibrations causing me to throw my head back in pleasure.
jeremiah dips his tongue into me, licking up all the juices and tracing figure eights against me. i squeeze the headboard tighter, becoming a moaning mess quickly. his tongue is magic. he fucks me with his mouth, my thighs shaking around his head,
“shit, jere.” i cry out, feeling my high coming closer. his hands squeeze my ass yet again before landing a smack on my left ass cheek. i moan loudly in response, my body flowing with immense pleasure, “fuck, i’m gonna come!”
he never slows his tongue as i feel my orgasm come crashing down on me. waves of pure pleasure crashing down. jeremiah licks up every last drop as i slowly come down from the high. i move myself down from his face and back down towards his groin. i lean down to kiss his passionately, tasting myself on his lips,
“holy shit, i can eat you out all day long.” he says to me as his hands fumble with his pants. he kicks off his pants and boxers. his erection slaps his lower abdomen and i drool at the sight of it. it’s huge, red tip begging for attention and veins pulsating on the sides of it.
i move to give him a blowjob but his grip on my waist prevents me from moving, “it’s your birthday.” jeremiah tells me, “you can give me head another time.” he winks
my hips position themselves above his thick and veiny cock and i lower myself onto it. he fills me up perfectly and we both moan loudly at the same time. every inch of him inside on me as i bottom out.
i slowly start rocking my hips against him, both of us becoming a panting mess. his hands never leave my hips, lifting me and slamming me back down onto his dick.
“you feel so good, baby” he praises, “you tight pussy feels amazing around me, fuck”
i continue riding him, my hands tangled up in his hair, pulling it which makes him moan.
“i- i think your cock was made for me.” i whisper in his ear before kissing him harshly.
he smirks, “oh yeah?”
and i nodded feverishly before he flips us around so im on my back and his on top of me, “sorry baby, i want to be in control now”
he pulls out almost entirely before slamming himself back in, the new position making him hit me even deeper than he was before. he thrusts harder and deeper, my back arches and i grab onto the sheets beside me, “fuck i’m close” i cry
“me too, hold on.” he continues fucking me, littering kissing on my face and neck. i can feel my inner muscles squeezing around him which makes jeremiah groan, “i’m fucking gonna come.”
“let it go.” he encourages me, his thumb going down to start abusing the bundle of nerves. almost immediately, i feel myself orgasm. my legs tightening around his waist and i feel him finish inside of me. he releases a series of curse words as he fucks us both through our orgasms.
a few moments after he pulls out and rolls next to me. we’re both breathing heavily, trying to catch our breaths, “holy shit” i pant out, looking over at him.
he grins, “that was amazing.”
“beyond amazing.” i repeat and he laughs,
“fuck, i should’ve asked you this before.” he says, reaching over to cup my face, “will you be my girlfriend, y/n?”
i blush, “yes, a hundred times yes!”
taglist! @randomaccountworld123 @bxbyyyjocelyn @20nugs @jeremiahxaesthetic
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lizlovestofangirl · 9 days
Text
"hey, baby"
ln4 x reader
headcannons about little daily things with lando
MASTERLIST
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first, the nicknames
he loves to call you things that reflect how much he loves you
"hey, baby"
"whatever you want, babe"
"of course love"
"come here, angel"
he would also 100% buy into the pookie trend
"POOKIE COME LOOK AT THIS"
"POOKIE IM HOME"
his love language is mainly physical touch, but also words of affirmation and gift giving
he loves to have a hand on you at all times
if you're cooking, he will wrap his arms around you and hold you while you cook
loves to hold you while you're sleeping or watching a movie
he's one of those guys that holds onto your left whenever you're sitting too
hand on your thigh or knee in the car>>>
playing with your hair (especially if it's curly) or playing with your clothes (especially dresses)
for words of affirmation, he is constantly telling you how much he loves you
it's his favorite thing to say and the thing he texts you the most
whenever you feel down, he always knows what to say to make you feel better
if he ever sees you looking at yourself in the mirror and not liking the way you look or talking about yourself badly, he takes the time to remind you why you're his favorite person
compliments 24/7
gorgeous, stunning, angelic, cute, hot, sexy, perfect, lovely, amazing
obviously, he has money
and he loves spoiling you with it
nice makeup, clothes, accessories
especially sunglasses and bags
he also loves to get you clothes for different events you go to together
(he also loves to match you a little bit, even with jewelry)
his absolute obsession is buying experiences for you
spa treatments and travel, but especially travel
he takes you anywhere
he has an album on his phone of pictures of you, not you and him just you, in places you had gone together and is probably getting a coffee table book made
when you two aren't traveling for fun, you're traveling for his job
if you wanted to keep working he would make that happen for you but if not, he would let you travel with him and explore your hobbies and passions
he loves having you in the paddock with him
he'll definitely gotten dragged into a few interviews, but only if you're okay with it
if you want to keep the relationship private, he will happily oblige because all he wants is you
but if you are okay with a public relationship, he will constantly be posting you
you're a sensation on tiktok because of the cute videos of the two of you
and there's tons of paparazzi photos of the two of you on the internet
the comments on the photos of you both are about how in love with you he is and how perfect the two of you are
pictures if you guys that aren't posed are filled with laughs, smiles, and just an overall amazing mood
he is happiest with you, truly
he is even happy to sit in silence with you
silence has never been so comfortable with someone
but he will also yap and yap and yap to you because of how comfortable he is
as already mentioned, he totally loves your hobbies and passions
whatever your music taste is, he is taking you to concerts and buying you merch and putting it on in the car
you like to read? he's building you a library (beauty and the beast coded)
you play an instrument? he will sit and listen to you for hours
he would especially love to hear you sing if that's your thing
always having the biggest smile on his face when you start singing in the car or while getting ready for the morning
if you like to cook or bake, he will make sure you have all the best ingredients and equipment
even going as far as to have the kitchen redone in your shared apartment
speaking of apartment, it is a perfect blend of you guys
artwork that matches both of your taste
comfortable couches to lay on
shelves of lando's trophies and old helmets
his and her vanities with each of your favorite products on the top
speaking of vanities, he loves to watch you get ready
he has no idea what you're doing, but he is mesmerized
he would definitely learn how to curl or straighten your hair for you
he's just very sweet and attentive, which is what makes your relationship work
when things get rough, he still manages to be soft and kind
you both make an effort to communicate well instead of yelling
if he ever yelled, he would cry
if he ever made you cry, he would kick himself for the rest of the month
he's made you cry tears of joy a lot, and tears of sadness only a few times
mostly when you're just feeling emotional already and aren't in the mood for anything
he immediately apologized and went to hold you
if you stepped back, he would burst into tears too
overall, he is everything you need and will ever need
he's the best best friend and boyfriend, and will be the best husband when the time comes
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hi saffy…can i request again? something fluff for a change. (you’ve drowned me with all the super hot hot hot smuts and now im swimming with—ahem..nevermind that) 😅
you know the tiktok trend of s/o leaving and their partner saying ‘i love you’ but the other is not saying back (or vice versa)? like they’re all pouty and demanding to have the other say it back or asking if they did something wrong..one vid even has teasingly repeats ‘i love you’ over and over again until their s/o gives in laughing.
how about the COD men (tf141, lv, konig) saying ‘i love you’ but never getting any in response as a prank?
only if you’re keen for it. please and thank you. 🥰
Yesss!!! I'm happy to do this one🙂❤️ (promise I'm still workin on your other one😉)
141 + LV & König x Reader, Where You Don't Say I Love You Back
Warnings: swearing, MILD smut reference, fluff
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Simon Ghost Riley-
“Alright, love, I’m headed out. I shouldn’t be gone too long.” Simon said as he pressed a kiss to your forehead. “I love you.”
“Have a good time with Johnny!” You gave your husband a warm smile, before looking back to the book you were reading. 
Simon paused for a moment and stared at you. His eyes narrowed at you, as you attempted to pay him no mind. You feigned ignorance as you turned to address him. 
“Everything okay, babe?”
He said nothing in reply, only continued to stare at you, crossing his arms.
"Simon?" You swallowed thickly. He was doing his best to intimidate you, and you'd be lying if you said it wasn't working.
He didn't take his eyes away from yours, as his brow furrowed slightly, giving you a menacing stare.
The two of you stood like that for the better part of two minutes, before you relented on your little prank. “Okay okay! Enough of that staring, it's creepy. I love you too Simon.”
“Damn fucking right you do.” He gave a satisfied smirk, before leaving.
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Johnny Soap MacTavish-
“So just milk, right?” Johnny had asked, as he unbuckled his seat belt. The two of you were in the supermarket parking lot. Johnny had offered to go in quickly, as you only needed one thing.
“Yep, thanks babe!” You smiled, before looking back to your phone.
“Alright. Be right back. I love you.” He pressed a kiss to your cheek before opening the car door.
He was halfway out the door, when he realized you weren’t planning on saying it back. “I love you.”
You looked up from your phone, the same smile still plastered on your face. “I know, thanks again!”
Johnny's face held a look of astonishment, as he moved to tickle at your sides. You squirmed in your seat, a fit of giggles erupting from your lips. “I SAID, I LOVE YOU, DAMNIT!”
You squealed as he continued his attack on your sides, before gasping out “I love you too Johnny!”
“There we go, lass. Was that so hard?” He had a mischievous smirk lining his lips. He pulled away his arms and crossed them against his chest arrogantly. 
“Screw you Johnny.” You chuckled, throwing an empty water bottle you found on the floor at him. 
“You love me though, you just said it yourself.” He quipped before stepping out of the car fully. “Next time you pull that shite with me, you’ll be in for worse than tickles."
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König-
You’d seen the various tik toks, of lovers not telling their partners they loved them back, and were curious to see how your boyfriend König would react.
"Hey, Kö. I'll be back in just a bit, going out for a drink with Kate." You pressed a kiss to your husband's cheek. 
König tore his eyes away from the computer screen, and gave you a small smile. "Have a good time, Maus, I love you." 
"Thanks babe!" You bit your lip slightly, trying to prevent yourself from ruining the prank.
You turned after giving him a half smile and made your way to the bar. 
König sat in silence for a moment after you left, reflecting. Had he done something wrong? Why didn't you say it back?
He started to feel terrible and tried to think of what he could've done to upset you. Nothing came to mind immediately, but König knew he had to do something to make it up to you, whatever he'd done. 
He set out your silky pajamas on the bed, and got out the makings for a bubble bath, as he awaited your text alerting him you were on your way home. 
Later that night, as you walked through your front door, you were immediately hit with an aroma of lavender. You recognized it right away as the bubble bath you loved so much. "Kö? Baby, I'm home."
You made your way up to the bathroom, to find your boyfriend hunched over the tub, checking the temperature of the water. "Schat! You're home!" 
You lifted your brows in question as you took in the scene before you. "What's this?"
"Oh.. I wanted to make it up to you for making you upset. Water is ready for you." He gestured to the bubble filled tub, not fully meeting your eyes. 
"Wait.. upset with you? Why would I be upset with you?"
"Well…earlier.. you didn't say it back. So I thought I'd done something.. wrong." He looked down to his feet. 
You couldn't help the small chuckle that emitted. "König, no! No, no, that was some stupidly horribly prank, I wasn't mad at you. Gosh, now I feel terrible! I love you so much, baby." 
You dropped your purse and moved to wrap your arms around his waist. König let out a deep breath as he chuckled. "I love you too, Maus. Now get in this bath. I believe I'm the one who's owed a massage now."
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John Price-
You and Price were cuddled on the couch together, his fingers tracing your sides softly. 
"I love you, Y/N." He said, pressing a kiss to your shoulder.
You turned to him and gave a warm smile before turning back to your TV show. 
Price blinked a few times, realizing you weren't planning on saying it back. He gave your side a playful pinch, causing you to let out a shriek. "I said, I love you. Nothing to say in return?" 
"Oh! How silly of me. Thank you sweetheart." You turned to your husband and batted your eyelashes at him sweetly.
Price looked exasperated at your words, his mouth dropping open slightly. "Oh hell no." 
He grabbed your waist, and threw you over his shoulder, making his way up the stairs to your bedroom. 
"Wait wait! I'm sorry, I love you too!" You called out, trying to squirm from his grasp. 
"Too late for that, sweetheart. Now get on all fours on the bed like a good girl." Price said as he threw you onto the bed. The slap that came down on your ass cheek told you that you'd be in for quite the night. 
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Kyle Gaz Garrick-
"I miss you, babe." Kyle's voice came through your cell phone. "I'll be home soon enough though."
"Unless it's yesterday, it's not soon enough." You chuckled, picking at some chipped paint in your kitchen table. "I miss you too."
"Well I gotta get going, I'll call you tomorrow, okay? I love you so much Y/N."
Your cheeks started to heat up at the sincerity of his words. "Okay, I'll talk to you tomorrow. Night Ky."
You hung up the call and let out a giggle. You'd seen the tik toks dozens of times where people didn't say I love you back and were curious to see what Kyle's reaction would be. 
Sure enough, seconds after you'd hung up. Kyle's name appeared on your phone. He was calling back. 
"Hey, are you all good?" You asked as you answered the call.  
"No, I'm not all good." Kyle huffed in mock annoyance. "Forgetting something?"
"Oh? Is it our anniversary? I could've sworn that it was next month."
Kyle let out an amused chuckle. "Seriously, babe. I love you."
Unable to continue on with your little prank you relented. "I love you too Kyle, always."
"Good girl, now we can hang up properly."
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Alejandro-
"Thank you so much for putting all this together, mi amor. The guys are grateful too." Alejandro pressed a kiss to your hand as he gathered the freshly made food from the counter. "I love you."
You were currently hosting a few members of Los Vaqueros at your home to watch a soccer game, and had just cooked up a few entrees to satiate their hungry bellies. 
"Of course, let me clean up and I'll come out in a moment." You turned back to the dishes in the sink, before hearing the dishes being set on the counter behind you.
"What, you not love me too?" Alejandro asked, coming up behind you, pulling you into him. He nipped your ear playfully, causing you to giggle. 
You squirmed in his firm grip as he continued to talk, mocking your voice. "Oh Alejandro. I love you too, you're the best husband in the whole world."
You erupted in a fit of laughter as he began squeezing at your sides. " I. Love. You. Too." You wheezed out. 
"Now was that so hard?" He teased, pressing a kiss to your jaw. 
He took your hand leading you into the family room, and stopped abruptly when all the men in the room started chanting out, "We love you too, Alejandro!"
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Rodolfo-
"Okay babe, I'm headed out to the store, I'll be back in an hour or so." You called out to your husband, who came to walk you to the door.
"Alright, let me know when you're on your way back, and I'll get dinner started. Drive safe, I love you." He gave you a chaste kiss as you opened the front door.
"Thanks love, see you in a bit!" You smiled before walking out to your car. 
Rodolfo moved to the door before realizing you hadn't said you loved him back. He quickly grabbed his sandals and ran out to your car.
You were just about to pull away, when your husband came running up to the driver's side window. He knocked on it, letting you know to roll it down. 
"Yes? Forget to add something to the list?" You turned to him, your brows furrowed.
"No, but you forgot something." He waited expectantly for you to reply, but you sat confused. 
"I love you, Y/N." He repeated, putting emphasis on his words. 
You let out a giggle, a smile breaking on your face. "I love you too, sappy bastard. Now move or I'll run over your toes."
You gave him a peck before pulling away. Rodolfo shook his head, laughing to himself. He got himself one spicy partner.
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Pairing : idol!Lee Minho x F!Reader TW : pregnancy ; unplanned pregnancy ; Minho is a jerk ; general angst ; fluffy ending ; Word Count : 6.3k Request : AHHH THANK YOU!! im happy that you like my request🥺🥺🥺🤍 hm bang chan would be good! he’s my bias after all HAHHAH buttt honestly speaking, i’d more than love to read about seungmin’s, minho’s or felix’s too <3 take your time!! A/N : the Minho gif came from this blog!!
Late… You were rarely ever late. You always kept track to make sure that you were on time and this month was no different. The little alerts had gone off from your calendar, and it’s not like you were under a lot of stress or anything that would cause any shifts… You were just… Late. 
The first day hadn’t exactly bothered you as much, the second day began to worry you, but now you were a week in and you still hadn’t gotten it and you were starting to panic… At least to yourself. Your boyfriend, who was usually just as on top of your monthly cycle as you were, was busy with his own schedule, making sure that he was prepared for the group's next big comeback. He didn’t have time to worry about something like this… That’s why you did your best to keep your panicking to a minimum when he was around. It’s not like you knew for certain anyway… Not yet at least. 
“Going to the store… Need anything?” You asked from the doorway, already slipping your shoes on. He was sitting on the couch, he looked so comfortable, you didn’t want to bother him by even letting him know where you were going, but you also knew that if you left without a word it would worry him. 
He looked up, running his hands through his hair as he let out a small yawn before shaking his head no. “You want me to go with you? You know that I don’t like you carrying a bunch of bags in by yourself, especially if I’m literally right here to help you do it.” He was already starting to get up off the couch, but you held your hands out, waving them at him before motioning for him to sit back down. 
“Lady things… I have to get lady things. That’s all. Just one bag.” You held up one finger, and he slowly sunk back into the couch, watching you grab the keys off the hook. He was clearly questioning you, the way you reacted, his eyebrows lowered and his eyes narrowed as he stared, and you didn’t want him to think too hard about it so you quickly ran over to him and pressed a kiss to his lips. “I love you, I’ll be back soon.” 
He hummed against your lips, and you felt the corners of his pull up before you pulled back, his hands firmly grasping your waist. “Love you too, babe… Be careful. Call me if you need anything… Okay?” You nodded in agreement before backing up and going back to the entryway, going back to putting on your shoes before going out the front door and taking a deep breath. You had dodged a bullet there… But there was a bigger one coming, the size of a missile, and you weren’t sure if you’d be able to dodge it now. 
You sat on the edge of the bathtub, the tests lined up along the back of the toilet, all of them face down. Thankfully Minho had been called into work at the last minute, and while he had been grumpy about it, you promised him dinner when he got back home and that had made him calm down enough to not question why you were trying so hard to get to the bathroom so quickly. 
The five minutes that it said it would take on the box felt more like 30 as you watched the timer on your phone slowly countdown. Your legs were bouncing nervously and you tried to focus on literally anything but your phone and the little white sticks that would inevitably decide your future. You couldn’t be pregnant… Right? Of course, there was always the chance… And it’s not like you and Minho had used protection the last couple times that you did it. Not that the both of you were trying… But with his busy schedule, the last thing that the two of you thought of was making sure to keep things like this happening. Whenever you had the chance to be together, you both were going at it… And that’s why you were sitting where you were at right now, chewing nervously on your fingernails as the timer on your phone got to 3… 2…1…
You stopped the alarm before it could go off and flipped the sticks over. Your breath had been held the entire time, and once the sticks were turned, it felt like you were going to be sick. Bright pink double lines seemed to be staring up at you, perfectly contrasted by the bright white of the stick. This wasn’t what you wanted to see, it wasn’t what you wanted at all, at least not right now… But here it was… The answer to your question as clear as a neon sign in your shaky hands. 
Even with the tests, it took you another five minutes after staring at them to really comprehend what was going on, to truly let it set in that this was not a dream and you truly were pregnant. It’s crazy though how, you had always wanted children, it’s not like the thought of being pregnant was inherently bad for you, it’s just the fact that it was so unplanned and you weren’t sure how Minho would take it. He had never said anything against you having his children, he even seemed to get slightly excited when the prospect of it was brought up… Why were you worried? The both of you knew that you were each other’s person, there was no one else that either of you could see each other even tolerating. He’d be fine… Maybe a little bit shocked at first, but fine at the end of it all. 
The front door clicked with the undoing of the lock and then the sound of keys jingling as he pulled them from the keyhole and pushed the door open, the entire time your head had been perked up to watch him come in. 
Dinner had been prepared, the table set, the pot on the stove set to a low simmer just to keep the food hot when he came in. You wanted everything to be perfect for him, his mood would… should be just right for when you delivered the news. “Dinner smells amazing, darling.” He commented from the front landing, pulling his shoes off before falling down onto the couch beside you and immediately pulling you close to him. “Have you eaten yet?” He murmured as he hugged you tight against him, his face buried in your hair. 
“Mnn nn…” You mumbled out your answer against his chest, pulling back enough to look at him. His eyes had bags underneath, he looked tired, but other than that he seemed happy, he looked happy. “Do you want to go eat now?” You chirped, the nerves kicking in now, knowing that if you followed your own plan, you’d be telling him very soon. 
“Yes please.” He practically groaned, his head falling back before his arm was pulled away from you and he got up off the couch, grabbing your hands and pulling you to your feet as well and then ushering you to the kitchen. “So what did you do today? Looks like you cleaned a lot… You didn’t have to do that. I like cleaning with you.” He pulled his chair out and sunk down into it as you transferred the pot from the stove to the middle of the table. 
“You were called in so randomly, I didn’t want you to have to worry about anything else when you came home…” You gave him a small smile as you sat across from him, moving the spoon in his direction so he could eat first. “Did they work you too hard today?” 
He snorted softly as he lifted the spoon, filling his bowl with the soup before looking up at you. “As hard as they usually do, yup.” He commented through his chuckles as he took a bite, his eyes closing and a muted moan coming through his closed lips as he chewed. “You must’ve worked yourself very hard today, this soup is amazing.” 
You sighed softly, your cheeks rising slightly with a smile as you thanked him quietly. “I have uhm…” Your heart was beating so loud, but you knew that you had to tell him, this wasn’t something that you could just hide from him until the baby came out in 9 months. “I have news… to tell you…” 
His eyes lifted from his bowl, his chopsticks pausing just outside his mouth as he stared at you. “What is it? Are you gonna come to the comeback show?” He asked, and you nodded in agreement to his question although that wasn’t the news that you were going to tell him, but you had been planning on going. “Perfect. I’ll do way better with you there, darling.” 
“I have… more news to tell you.” You whispered, dropping your hands from the table to nervously rub your thighs, your palms becoming sweaty just from the buildup to this. His eyes were bright as he looked at you expectantly, waiting for the news to leave your lips. “I’m… I’m pregnant.” You breathed out the words, your heart frozen as you waited for his reaction. 
He blinked once… twice… the sparkle in his eyes fading every time they closed and reopened, his smile slowly dropping until his lips were set in a straight line. “Okay… And?” The reaction was… definitely not what you had expected. You didn’t even know how he was feeling, his words, his face, it gave you no answer. 
“I just… wanted to let you know…” You murmured, dropping your eyes back down to your soup bowl and finally taking the first bite. He was still looking at you, you could feel it even, and then he let out a sigh, his chopsticks hitting the edge of the bowl had you slowly glancing up at him. 
“Picked a really good time to tell me… I have so much going on already and now I have to worry about this.” He grumbled and your eyes wavered as you tried to process what he was saying, what he was talking about. It’s not like he was the one carrying the baby, there wasn’t even anything that he had to do right now. 
“Just… pretend I didn’t tell you…” You looked back down into your bowl, stirring the vegetables as you shook your head. “I’m sorry… I should have waited until after the comeback.” 
He ran his hand through his hair, leaning back in his chair. “My entire life is busy, Y/N. I don’t have time for a kid, I don’t have time to worry about this.” He motioned to you, but his hands were slightly lower and you knew that he was talking about the baby. “I won’t be able to sleep, I’ll… I mean… What the fuck.” 
Now you were blinking blankly at him, your heart frozen in the deepest pit of your stomach. “Wh-What do you want me to do? I’m… I’d wake up with the baby… I’d take care of it… I don’t… I don’t know what you want me to do. I thought…” Your breathing was becoming heavier and you shivered under his intense gaze. 
“We’re not married… hell, we’re not even engaged yet! What will the company think? Do you know what they’d do to me? They could kick me out of the group! And my family… Oh my god. I already have three cats to take care of and… I can’t do this.” He pushed away from the table, going straight to the door, not even putting his shoes on, just picking them up off the floor and heading out the door like he couldn’t wait to be away from you, leaving you at the table gasping for breaths as tears streamed down your face. 
Minho had gone to the dorms, going to his only hyung for advice on what to do. Of course, Chan was more level headed then any of the other guys would be, he saw things from every direction, every perspective, and after listening to his advice for over two hours, Minho knew he had made a mistake. He had been with you for two years, not on and off, a straight two years, he was absolutely head over heels for you. It’s not even like he didn’t want children, he did, and he wanted them with you. Having it all laid out for him like that, it really opened his eyes. 
Two days, he only stayed at the dorms for two days and one night, giving you the time he assumed you’d need to calm down because he was sure that you’d be angry at him. He couldn’t even imagine how you must’ve felt and he’s been kicking himself over it every hour, every second of every day. He had tried to text you, just to check up on you to see how you were doing, but you didn’t respond. He understood. He had tried to call you at night, he listened to each ring until it finally went to voicemail, and that too, he understood. You didn’t want to talk to him… He’d just have to suck it up and deal with it. 
Street lights illuminated the road as he drove back home, and he was sure there wouldn’t be dinner waiting for him like there was the night that he had left. Of course, he shouldn’t be expecting it, he shouldn’t be expecting anything of you after what he had said. He was expecting you to still be there though, that was the one thing he hadn’t been prepared for. The house completely empty of your physical presence, yet the pictures still hang on the walls. You had been there, but you were gone now. A thorough search of the house only proved what he already knew. 
His phone was immediately pulled out, texting you again to ask where you were, and when a response didn’t come in within five seconds, he was calling you and leaving messages until your voicemail box was full. Were you doing the same thing he did? Maybe you were just going to be gone for a day or two and then you’d be back. He sent one more text. “Darling, I’m home. I know you’re upset, but I want to talk to you. I’ll wait for you.” 
And wait he did, for a day, then two, then a week… Then a month, then two, then three… You weren’t coming back. He had called your parents and they had told him that you weren’t there, although he was sure they were just lying for you considering they didn’t sound worried. They were covering for you, you didn’t want to see him. That didn’t stop him from going over to your parents house to try to see you though. Every time he did, the door would be cracked open, just enough for someone, anyone but you to peek out and tell him that you weren’t there. 
He was getting pissed, especially during the one trip he made during the winter, six months after you had left without even a single word spoken to him since, your snow boots clearly sitting on the front porch. “Just let me fucking see her! I know she’s here!” He shouted, slamming his fists against the door to try to push it open, but your father pushed against him and swiftly locked it, leaving Minho a frustrated crying mess on the porch. 
The worst part was not knowing what was going on, not knowing how you were doing, not knowing how the baby was doing. Were you still even pregnant? He hated not knowing, but the worst part was that the one thing he did know was that it was his fault that all of this was happening. 
He became absolutely ruthless during practice, laying into anyone that messed up a routine, yelling if someone simply even misstepped. He couldn’t help it, it felt like he was in shambles, his entire life was falling apart. He was going to be a dad, that much he knew, but he didn’t know anything else and that made him feel worse. 
“You need to calm down.” Bangchan said as Minho stood off to the side, breathing heavily after practicing as hard as he could, the only thing that kept his mind off of you. “Have you tried calling around the OB’s? Maybe they’ll tell you which one she’s at and you can meet her there.” 
“That’s fucking stupid.” Minho muttered, running a hand through his sweat drenched hair. “They’re not going to give me that information, you know that. She doesn’t want to see me anyway… I’m gonna have a kid in a month… if it’s not already here yet… And I don’t know anything about it.” He was huffing, it almost sounded like he was hyperventilating. “Just leave me alone… I want to be alone.” 
“You’re being hard headed. Have you tried to talk to her at all?” Bangchan foolishly questioned, and Minho whipped his head in the leader's direction, his jaw set and his fists clenched at his sides. 
“The fuck kind of question is that?! Of course I’ve tried to talk to her! I’ve almost had the cops called on me at her parents house because I tried to get in. I’ve tried everything!” He shouted, pushing against Chan to try to get him to the door. “Leave me the fuck alone. I want to be alone.” 
There was nothing else that Chan could say as he was literally being shoved out of the room. He knew this couldn’t go on any longer though. Minho could barely even sing, they were in the process of recording a new album and it seemed like he would read into the lyrics of every single song and find a way to attribute them to you. He’d start crying and having to take breaks, but his dances were almost violent… He was becoming violent. 
You sat in the rocking chair in the nursery that had been set up in the guest room at your parents house, looking over the ultrasound pictures of your daughter that was bound to come out any day now. Your parents were out right now, both of them working while you were on your break from working at home. It was one of the many perks of your job. When you had gotten further along in your pregnancy your boss told you to just stay home, allowing you to take your work laptop home with you. 
Just as you were about to head back into your room/office to get back to work, the doorbell rang. The last person you thought it would be was Minho, he hadn’t tried to see you since December and it was February now. It had been almost 2 months since you’ve heard his voice shouting from the other side of the front door. That’s why you got up as fast as you could, waddling your way down the stairs and pulling the door open. 
“Jisung?” You said, although it was more of a question as you stared at the sheepish man on your porch. “What are you doing here?” You looked around, checking to see if Minho was there as well, but Jisung shook his head as if he could tell what you were thinking. 
“He’s not here. It’s just me.” He said, and then you felt his eyes scan over you, slightly bulging when they landed on your stomach. “You uh… You’re like… Pregnant pregnant. When are you due?” 
You rolled your eyes, leaning against the door and shaking your head at his question. “Why are you here? Seriously… I don’t need you to be Minhos minion. He chose this, he left, he didn’t want her so he doesn’t get me.” Jisungs lips parted into a small ‘o’ and you mentally cursed yourself for letting that small piece of information loose. 
“It’s a girl? Wow… a niece…” He whispered, but he let out a small sigh. “I’m not here for Minho. I’m here because of Minho. He’s being an ass, he’s actually scary. Not even I can calm him down, and he went off on Chan yesterday.” He seemed so nervous being there and, after 2 years of being with Minho, you knew the rest of the guys just as well as you knew your boyfriend. Jisung surely wasn’t enjoying this, and you felt bad for him. He had come here on his own to try to talk to you, to save the rest of the guys from Minhos rage. 
You stepped back from the door, letting him through and showing him to the living room. “Let me just tell my boss that something came up…” You sighed, waiting for him to sit down before waddling into the kitchen and texting your boss. Out of all the guys, you knew Jisung the most, you had hung out with him and Minho the most, you were closer to him than any of the other guys and that’s why you felt a little less uncomfortable with him being here. “Do you need anything to drink? Water? Tea?” You called from the kitchen and he shouted out a ‘no’, but you still grabbed two cups and filled them with water before returning. “What’s he been doing?” You asked, letting out a little grunt as you lowered yourself down into the chair. 
Jisungs hands moved out as if to help you, and you shook your head, letting out a little giggle once you were settled in. “He’s… He’s vicious. He yells at everyone and he’s so short fused… It’s scary. He’s scary.” His hands slid over his face before his palms slapped against his lap. “He misses you and he’s angry with himself and he’s taking it out on everyone else. We don’t know what to do… just… Can you talk to him? Please?” 
You knew that this was coming, you knew the request was going to come, but you didn’t know things were this bad for them. You felt awful, and it’s not like it was directly your fault, but you were the only one that could fix things. “Fine…” You relented, taking a deep breath before holding your hand out. “Let me use your phone, I left mine in the kitchen.” Jisung nodded, about to get up from the couch, but you shook your head. “No… I want to use your phone. I don’t want him to know my number.” You pushed your palm out further and Jisung looked a little dumbfounded at your persistence but let it go, pulling his phone out of his pocket and dialing Minhos number. 
“He’s her father… What if he wants to keep in touch with you to know about how she’s doing?” Jisung asked quietly as the phone rang. It was put on speaker phone in the center of the table so that you both could talk and you both could listen. “I think you should let him have your number.” 
“He said he was too busy for this life, again, it was his choice and I’m just following through with it. I’m doing him a favor.” You hissed, not wanting him to hear you immediately just in case he did answer. “He can’t just say what he said and then decide later that he messed up.” 
“It wasn’t decided later though, it only took two days for him to come back and realize he screwed up. You were already gone.” Jisung retorted and your mouth snapped shut as you leaned back further on the couch, your arms wrapping around your stomach to cradle it. 
“You don’t understand what it felt like… for him to just decide that he didn’t want this and walk out… that hurt, Jisung. He put the company and the group first, and fine… he knew you guys longer… I get that… But this is a child and it’s my child… and I’m gonna protect her.” You whispered, a soft sigh flowing through your nose as you looked at the phone that was still ringing in the middle of the coffee table. “He’s not answering. This was pointless. I think you should go now.” 
“For fucks sake, I thought you’d give up if I didn’t answer on the first three rings.” Minhos voice rang through the speaker and the sound of it had your heart stopping. He sounded so… angry. You had never heard him sound like that before. “What do you want? Make it fast, I’m busy.” 
Jisung looked at you but you shook your head, motioning for him to talk first and he rolled his eyes, leaning forward to be closer to the mic. “I’m uh… I’m over…” He looked to you and you shook your head faster, your eyes wide, knowing that if Jisung said it right now the call would end and Minho would be racing over. “How are you feeling right now? I was wondering if you wanted to go meet up for coffee or something?” 
Minho scoffed loudly and you heard the light shuffle of his feet and heavy breaths, he must’ve been practicing again. “How am I feeling? Like shit, Jisung! I don’t know what’s going on, I don’t know what she’s doing, I don’t know anything about the baby. Does she still… Is she still pregnant? Did she have the baby? Did she have to do it by herself? I don’t know shit and I’m losing my fucking mind. So no, I don’t want to meet up for coffee, I don’t want to do anything.” 
Jisungs teeth gritted together nervously as he stared at you, but you were silent, your eyes staring down at the little waves that moved in your stomach from your daughter kicking. “She didn’t have her yet…” Jisung murmured, and your eyes widened as they shot up to look at him. “What? What am I supposed to say?! You won’t say anything!” He practically shouted at you and you felt your chest tighten as angry tears threatened to fall. 
“What am I supposed to say!? I haven’t talked to him in 8 fucking months!” You shouted back, your face falling into your hands as you took a deep breath. You heard nothing from Minhos end though, an incredible silence coming through the speakers before he cleared his throat. 
“Are you… there? You’re with her? Is that Y/N?” Minho stammered, and then you could hear a gust of wind as if he were running, and you knew that if he was, he’d probably be at your front door in an hour or less. “When… Why are you there?! What are you doing there?! Why are you with her?!” 
You rolled your eyes at his screaming and Jisung threw his hands up in disbelief, letting his head fall against the back cushions of the couch. “Because you’ve been an asshole and they came to me hoping that I could cure you of that.” You answered and you heard Jisung snicker to himself at your response. “What crawled up your ass? Why are you taking it out on them?” 
“I…” Minho started and you heard a car door open and then slam shut as the engine roared to life. “Well wouldn’t you be pissed if you had a baby and you haven’t gotten to see a picture and ultrasound… I haven’t heard a heartbeat or anything! I’m pissed!” You heard the phone hit the steering wheel as his car peeled out of the parking spot. 
“Don’t hold your phone and drive, idiot!” You scolded and as if on command you heard the phone get thrown onto the passenger seat. You huffed loudly before speaking. “You walked out on me, you chose your job. I wasn’t going to force you to be a parent when you clearly weren’t ready to be one.” You explained, and you heard him groan loudly through the speaker. 
“I was gone for two days! You were gone when I came back! You’ve been gone for 8 fucking months!” He screeched, and then you heard him slam on the brakes as horns went off all around him. Your heart stopped momentarily before he started ranting out curses at whoever had messed up on the road. “I thought we’d be able to talk about things but no! You went to your parents house and had them lie to me! I almost had the cops called on me just to see you!” 
You quickly covered your mouth to stifle your laughter, remembering the look of shock on his face as you watched from the top window. “Well you tried to punch through the door! You scared my dad!” You said between giggles, and even Jisung started to chuckle now. 
“It’s not funny! Do you know how many restraining orders I would have broken to see you and the baby?!” He screeched, but even he seemed to be calming down, the lengthy breath he let out shook with silent laughter. “So how are you feeling?” 
The sudden shift in tone had you pursing your lips, hating to admit to yourself that you missed him. You missed the goofy bickering, the way he cared about you, the way he’d look at you as if you were the only woman in the entire universe. “I’m feeling- What the hell?” The line went dead before you had the chance to finish, and you knew how Minho drove when he was in a hurry, your heart lurched into your throat as you moved to get up off the couch. “H-Help me up…” You reached out your hand to Jisung who began to panic when he saw you. 
It’s not like you knew the first thing that you were going to do, but you were gonna go out on the road to look for him, to make sure he was okay. “Yeah… Yeah I’ll get your shoes just… Hold up…” Jisung stammered, looking around the room cluelessly until you pointed to the little cupboard box near the entryway and he rushed over, grabbing the first pair of shoes he saw. 
The click of the front doorknob turning had you immediately defending yourself and Jisungs presence. “It’s okay dad… I’m gonna be back soon. I have to go find Minho… I think… I’m worried about him and I still love him and I want him to be a part of her life…” You explained breathlessly as you tied your shoes before sitting up once more and turning to look at the door. 
There Minho stood, his eyes squinted with the cockiest smile as he shoved his hands into his coat pockets. “Never heard you call me dad before… I don’t know if I like it or not yet.” He teased, toeing his shoes off next to the door before walking over to where you sat. “I’m glad you still love me though, woulda been weird to have to take you on all the first dates over again with the baby in the stroller.” The teasing tone was gone when his attention turned to Jisung who was sitting on the floor next, having helped you put your shoes on. “Did you really come here just to tell her I’ve been an asshole?” 
“Uhm… Yeah? Because you were being a really big asshole. Needed that shit to stop, so I went to the only person who would be able to stop it.” He motioned towards you with both of his hands, the usual Jisung smile on his face as he did. “And aren’t you happy? I mean, if I didn’t come here you probably would still be trying to get past her parents and you would have missed the birth of your daughter. So, I feel like you should be thanking me. And even if you won’t say it out loud… You’re welcome.” He pushed himself up off the floor, patting your head before walking over to the door and letting himself out. “I feel like you two have a lot of catching up to do, so I will be leaving. See you later!” 
Now that Jisung was gone, it felt like the comedic relief that the two of you needed had left as well, leaving an awkward film lingering in the air as you and Minho stared at each other. “You uh… you look like you’re really close. How much longer?” He asked nervously now, lowering down onto the arm of the couch to get a better view of you and your stomach. 
“About two weeks…” You murmured, swallowing thickly as you thought about it. “I’ve been going to the lamaze classes and doing the little breathing exercises to get ready… It was just hard to be at the classes since I was the only one there alone.” Minho nodded slowly, his heart aching at the thought of you going through all of this by yourself. “Her room is all set up though… Me and my dad worked on it for a while… I kept getting tired.” 
“So… you’ll be staying here?” He hated that… You and his daughter being so far away from him. It took him an hour to get there from the office, and his house was another hour in the opposite direction. He didn’t want to have to drive two hours just to see you and his baby. “I… You know… I didn’t know that she would be… A girl… But… I’ve been hoping and preparing… I’ve got a room set up for her too. It made me feel a little better… I even got the clothes and the diapers and stuff.” 
Your thumbs twirled around each other as you looked away from him. You knew that at some point it would need to be brought up, you just hadn’t had the chance to really prep what you were going to say to him. “I love you, Minho… But I never planned on going back to you.” You heard the sharp gasp be pushed from his lungs at the revelation. “It wasn’t to hurt you though… I know how important your job is to you. I was doing it to protect you, to protect the guys. I wasn’t going to hide her from you, or keep her from you forever… But I needed to get myself used to doing this on my own so that I didn’t feel like I had to depend on you. I was doing it for me… For her…” 
He slipped off the arm of the couch to fall on the cushion beside you, his hand hesitantly raising before lowering it down on your stomach, his thumb lightly brushing along the fabric that hung loosely over it. “My job is important… But it’s not more important than you, and it’s definitely not more important than her. One day the group is going to be done… And sure, I’ll still have the guys, but I don’t want to be the one sitting around while they all have families of their own… I don’t want to be the one alone while knowing that I do have a family… I just pushed them away. I don’t want you to do this on your own either… You shouldn’t have to. I want to be here, Y/N. I want to be her father… And I want to be your… Your husband.” 
Marriage had never been a topic that the two of you went too far in depth into when it got brought up, you both would ever so lightly touch base on it and then quickly move onto the next topic. It’s not that you didn’t want to get married, it just didn’t seem like an important thing to do during the two years that you had been dating. The only time that it had been seriously brought up was during that talk eight months ago that led to this.
He pulled the box out of his pocket, chuckling softly to himself as he looked at it. “You know… I brought this with me every single time I came to try and see you…” He commented as he opened it up, revealing a thin silver band with the smallest diamond on top. “There’s no one else I’d rather spend the rest of my life with, no one else I’d rather be starting my family with. I don’t care what management will say, I don’t care what anyone says… I don’t care what happens, as long as I get to be with you and her… So please… Will you say yes? I want to at least try to do this the right way…” 
You sniffled softly, looking down at your hand that the ring was supposed to be placed on, wiggling your finger, it was so easy to imagine what it would look like once it was slipped on. “You make it so hard to hate you, Lee Minho…” You mumbled, wiping your tears with the sleeve of your shirt before letting your hands drop back down to your sides. 
“That should be a good thing, darling. I don’t want you to hate me.” He grabbed your hand, placing the ring delicately on your finger, the fit was perfect, made specifically and only for you. “I want you to love me as much as I love you… And if you’re still unsure… I promise to spend the rest of my life making sure you’re happy, and you’re comfortable, and you know that you’re loved by me.” He pressed a kiss to the back of your hand before leaning in to kiss you softly, the feeling opening a floodgate of memories that had tears rushing faster down your cheeks, and he worked quickly to catch each and every single one before they had the chance to reach your chin. “I think I’ve got about 8 months worth of catching up to do before the two weeks are up… You think we got enough time?”
2K notes · View notes
emocheol · 2 months
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first kiss with seventeen
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seungcheol
gets all nervous
has been planning this for weeks
wants it to be so good so bad that he ends up colliding his forehead with yours when he’s going in
gets all red from embarrassment and makes you swear to never tell anyone about it (so of course you tell everyone)
“please tell me that wasn’t the worst first kiss you’ve had”
“well if that’s what you want to hear…”
jeonghan
makes you make the first move
can tell that you’ve been wanting to kiss him since you’re always looking at his lips, just wants to make you work for it
will spend the entire day teasing you by getting close and then pulling away
you have to grab his face and hold him there to finally kiss him
he won’t ever let you live down the fact that technically you made the first move
“you’re obsessed with me, huh?”
“you’ve been teasing me all day!”
“doesn’t change the fact”
joshua
extremely confident
just makes out with you when he feels the timing is right
can’t get enough and will not stop kissing you
becomes a norm in your relationship for him to kiss you every second he gets
“why are you always kissing me?”
“why? can’t i show my partner how much i love them?”
jun
shy shy shy
makes a whole romantic date and at the end he asks if it’s okay to kiss you
is soooo nervous that you’re going to say no, but of course you say yes
swears that fireworks explode when your lips touch
he is so whipped for you
“i think im in love with you”
“what was that?”
“uhhh i think we need more glue!”
soonyoung
gives it no thought
just spontaneously kisses you when he gets extra happy one day
“babe! look our song is number 1!” and presses a bunch of kisses on your lips
all he remembers is how nice it feels to kiss you
continues to kiss you whenever he feels like it and loves it twice as much whenever you initiate it
“soonyoung! you just kissed me!”
“yeah! did you not like it? :(”
“no it’s okay, do it again”
wonwoo
quite simple about it
will pucker his lips at you and wait for you to kiss him
won’t get embarrassed over it either
he’s in love with you! he’s not scared to show his affection
“wonwoo what are you doing?”
“waiting for you to kiss me, angel”
jihoon
heat of the moment kiss
everything feels so right
feels like he’d be doing you a disservice if he didn’t kiss you
is the most gentle man on the planet and holds your face in his hands
will let you take control of the kiss, just this one time
you’ll be grinning like an idiot
“what was that for?”
“just felt right”
minghao
encourages you to kiss him first
you just got promoted at your job and you’re over the moon about it, so you’re celebrating with minghao
“you can kiss me if you want” he’ll say as if it’s the most casual sentence ever
you get all shy and press a sweet kiss to his lips
he’ll take the lead
“don’t be shy, sweetheart”
“you’re just too handsome :(”
mingyu
he’ll be sick and sulking because he wants to go on your planned date but he can’t get out of bed
profusely apologizes but you won’t accept them because it’s not his fault!
when he won’t stop rambling you’ll lean down and kiss him to shut up him
when you pull away he has a dopey smile on his face
“do that again!”
“i can’t risk getting sick…”
“i’ll nurse you back to health”
pulls you down to him, and pecks your lips a bunch of times
seokmin
#1 gentleman
wine and dine
“i totally understand if you’re not ready but, can i kiss you?” SWOON
makes you feel like the most special person on the planet
will still ask you if he can kiss you multiple times after that
“can i kiss you?”
“seokmin we’ve been together for a year”
“doesn’t hurt to ask!”
seungkwan
smooth so so smooth
you’ll be playing a game and the prize is the winner gets to make the loser do whatever they want
seungkwan wins (of course)
pretends to think about what he wants even though he knows
“kiss me”
“what?!”
“i won so i want you to kiss me”
cue you being a blushing mess and giving seungkwan a light kiss
vernon
gets home from work one day and kisses you when he walks through the door
you’re shocked and he’s acting like it’s an every day occurrence
doesn’t want to make a big deal out of it
(he’s secretly been wanting to kiss you for weeks)
“what was that for?”
“just missed you, baby”
this becomes a regular occurrence when he gets home from work now
chan
nervous as hell
wants to be smooth and he is!
until he’s not
accidentally bites your tongue (a/n: i have had a man bite my tongue before and it hurt for a week)
profusely apologies but he’s such a cutie, how can you be mad?
“i’m so sorry, do you want me to get ice?”
“no, chan, just kiss me again”
does it right this time
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863 notes · View notes
renranram · 2 months
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Baby making ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁
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nsfw + fluff
it's literally the title lmfao 😭
let's all be honest here and be straight to the point, schlatt wants to impregnate you ever since he saw you interacting with kids in unpaid intern
ludwig knew by putting both of you two in his show would make great content but he didn't expect he'll actually be an uncle soon
“ baby “ schlatt leans in as you work on editing a new video of yours, “ hm? yeah? “ you look up at him as you lower down your headphones
“ can't you edit later? wanna kiss you “ he states, whiney as he starts pecking your neck, you gasping, feeling his teeth sink in, “ jay… i dont think that's kissing “ you pat his back, hoping to crack a joke
“ y/n… be honest with me okay? “ he pause, pulling away as he faces you, cupping your cheeks as he continues, “ what do you think about children? “ he asks out
as you burst out chuckling, finding him adorable by saying that in a straight face, oblivious of his intentions
“ what? don't laugh im being serious “ he couldn't help but chuckle as he fixes your hair, “ no… it's just… i thought it was gonna be a serious question then you asked me about babies “ you smile
“ it is serious “ he defends himself, smiling at you as you take a deep breath, calming down as you nod, “ uhm… well… i like children..? “
schlatt looks at you weirdly, teasing you, “ ay! i dont mean it that way! “ you playfully hit your fiancé
“ i meant… i wanna take care of children, im happy to take care of children “ you explain thoroughly, as schlatt continues to tease you, as he cocks up one of his eyebrow
“ oh shut up schlatt, you know what i mean “ you chuckle as schlatt sighs, pecking your cheek, “ … okay okay i get it… but you know.. uh.. what about our own children? “
“ our children? “ you repeat, blinking in surprise, “ h-huh…? “ you ask as schlatt caresses your hair
“ toots… i… wanna have children with you “ schlatt confesses, “ our marriage is in 3 weeks… “
“ come on… please… ever since lud’s show… i wanna just… fucking bend you over and fill you up with babies toots.. “ he leans his face on your neck, as your body shivered, feeling his hot breath on your neck
“ jay..! “ you exclaim, surprised, “ what? if you've only seen yourself taking care of those kids, you dont realize how much im excited to wife you up and make you carry my children so badly “ he caresses you hair
“ y/n… babe… please “ he starts pecking your neck, “ toots… please… let me fill you up, let me see you carry our children “
“ … jay “ that's the word that you can mutter out, “ can we do it? “ he gently asks as you take a deep breather, before slowly nodding, “ … okay “
“ fuck… im gonna make love to you all night holy shit “ he chuckles in success as he easily carries you up from your desk as you squeal, surprised
the two of you lock lips, kissing eachother as schlatt holds your back for support before gently setting you down on your guy's bed, hungrily devouring your lips but being so gentle as he slips his hand in your shirt
fondling with your breast, that's why he preferred whenever you don't wear any bras, for easy access if yk what i mean
he gently removes your shirt, liking how your nipples perk up, as he breaks the kiss a string of saliva connects your lips, as he kisses your breast, his lips sucking on your nipples as he looks up at you with those endearing eyes of his
“ angh… jay “ you moan out as he trace kisses all over your body until it reaches your hips, his hand gently guiding you as he removes your pants and panties
“ does it feel good? “ he asks, as he threw your last piece of clothing on your bedroom's floor, as you nod in response, “ i want you to feel so good okay? “ schlatt smiles
as he gently divides your legs, making you spread out for him, “ fuck… how do you get this wet so easily? “ schlatt states before gently entering a finger in, causing you to gasp
“ because… you make me so wet “ you chuckle softly as schlatt chuckes too, slowly thrusting his finger in and out as he leans in to peck your clit
he savors your pussy as he digs himself in, tasting you as he moans out while you arch your back in pleasure, holding onto his hair as you moan his name out, “ jay… fuck “
he swirls his tongue in, fucking your hole with his tongue, he can feel your flaps flutter as he continues on
he licks your clit, swirling his tongue around it even sucking it, “ feels so good toots? feels so good hm? “ he repeats, mumbling as he eats you out
“ yes… yes… ah… schlatt “ you gently pulls on his hair as he continues to thrust his finger in while tongue fucking you, adding another finger causing you to gasp again as you rolls your eyes back
you wrap your legs around his head, locking him in as he notices your breath fastening, you're close, he continues to lick you out as your moans are getting louder and louder every second
“ b-babe… ugh… im cumming “ you breathe out but immediately regretted it as schlatt pulls away, as you whine, “ what the fuck “ you groan out, now pouting
“ dont look at me like that “ schlatt chuckles, “ im not letting my wife get an orgasm because i ate her out “ he replies as he unties his jogs, lowering it revealing his hard dick, not wearing any underwear since it's only you two home
“ remember, our focus here is getting you pregnant with our healthy babies, not tongue fucking you until you're pleasured “ he smiles, teasing you as he pats your cheek, pecking you
he slowly pushes his tip in, teasing you as he rubs it on your clit, “ then get me pregnant already… you're just teasing me at this point “ you pout as he slaps the side of your hips
“ so impatient, are you this eager to be a mother already? “ schlatt pushes his whole size in, gasping, feeling his dick fill you up, you can feel it throbbing inside you
“ fuck! “ you gasp out, as schlatt holds your hips, slamming his dick inside of you, as you gasp again, moaning, enjoying how you easily bounce off just from a thrust
“ you look more prettier like this, “ he teases you, leaning in as he folds your body in half just to able to lock lips with you again, “ i should fuck you everyday so we can be sure you get pregnant “ he added
his rolls his hips, his hands trailing all over your body, touching every part of you, his hands trace your curves, admiring your shape and body
kissing your forehead, cheek, neck, everywhere, this man makes you feel loved everytime, “ you're gonna look so pretty with my kids, yeah? “ schlatt fucks you up
“ you're gonna be my little pretty wife okay, gonna see you carry our kids, gonna make you be a pretty little housewife “
after saying those you can feel his pace fasten, god, it really does feel different without the rubber, you thought, as your room fills with moans, skin slapping, thrusts, groans and squelches
“ ah ngh jay- jay- please… “ you moan out, pulling on his hair as you can feel him throb, his thrusts getting aggressive every second as your body limps in pleasure
“ im cumming.. im cumming.. baby, toots.. ugh.. im gonna fill you up, im gonna fill you up with my babies, you're gonna… fuck… look so pretty pregnant, you're gonna be the most prettiest.. fucking housewife ever “ schlatt starts to peck your face before catching your lips
the two of you kiss, your tongues tangled with eachother as he finally cums inside of you, while you squirt your juices, unison with his orgasm, schlatt pulls out, chuckling in amusement as he sees his semen leaks out of you
“ fuck… you're gonna be a the mother of our children soon “ he smiles, pushing his finger in to keep his semen from leaking
-
a full year had passed, your child was finally brought on the world, you sigh out as you publish a new video, as you look behind, seeing schlatt was holding your daughter, carrying her as he smiles at you
“ is she asleep? “ you stand up, approaching them, “ surprisingly yeah, she's been behaving for me “ schlatt gently caresses your daughter face
admiring as the 3 month old scrunches her face in her sleep, “ she's a big mama’s girl huh? “ you ask, as schlatt nods, “ i think she loves you more than me “
“ but in her defense, if you're my mom id prefer you “ schlatt jokes as you chuckle, leaning your head onto his shoulder
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wonfilms · 4 months
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enhypen & the ways they say "i love you" (without actually saying it) ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
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warnings : n/a : gen: fluff a/n: im back?!? after almost 6 mths .. but yes i'm back, (finally..) school has been HELL, BUT yrhome is back in action, i hope this is alright even though i feel a little rusty hehe, reblogs & comments are very much appreciated
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heeseung -> "this song reminded me of you." - heeseung's love is constant, never once wavering. he sees you in every little part of his life.. he thinks about you constantly never once do you leave his mind he discovers a melody that seems to capture you within mere musical notes... so he shares it with you.. each song that make his heart swell just like you do.
jay -> "you wanted this right? i saw you looking at it at the store last weekend?" - jay's love is bold yet gentle, almost like a first love and a last kiss paired in one. jay remembers everything about you, your favourite colour, which perfume you use, what shoe size you are, what makes you tick and what comforts you after a long day? so it's no surprise that when he caught you eyeing that lipstick at the store he just had to buy it for you, whatever makes you happy is all he wants.
jake -> "give me one more kiss, please babe just one more..??" - jake's love is exhilerating and yet comfortable all at once, like the fond nostalgia of a childhood fair-ground ride. he should be out of bed right now, rushing to get ready for work but he can't help himself.. not when you look that damn beautiful laid in his arms , he kisses you softly letting the feeling linger. just one more kiss, he pleads.. but you both know that's never the case
sunghoon -> "have you eaten yet baby?" - sunghoon's love is soft, sweet and it feels warm like a bowl of soup. he never fails to ask you whether you'd eaten yet, always. he takes comfort in knowing you're still safe and healthy. he shows his love through words, whispered confessions against your neck and gentle squeezes of your hip as he kisses you to sleep at night.
sunoo -> "i wish i could see you all the damn time" - sunoo's love tastes like oranges and frozen grapes. he didn't think he'd ever want someone's company like he wants yours.. he needs you he wants you by his side even more with every passing minute. it feels almost natural to see your smile and your pretty eyes every minute of the day, it's like a second nature to him to admire you. jungwon -> "i wanna grow old with you one day" - jungwon's love is like rainy days spent cuddling next to the fire. he's never been one to shy away from the words 'i love you', but that's probably just because it's you. hell, love is terrifying but he knows you're the one for him. his other half the last little missing puzzle piece in his life, you're perfect for him. niki -> "you make me wanna try." - niki's love is like a gentle studio ghibli movie. it's not perfect but yet it still it. his love is encouragement, soft words of affection exchanged in private and heart-wrenching embraces that make you feel like melting. you're both young, and maybe thats completely okay, love is also helping the person you love most grow and change and still staying by each other's side.
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