#Best Self-Massage Tools

[bondwand]

The Bond Wand Self-Massage Revolution with The Best Self-Massage Tools

[roadreliefwellness]

The Best Self-Massage Tools: Your Guide to Relaxation and Relief

It can be difficult to schedule an appointment with a professional massage therapist in today's busy society. Thankfully, the best self-massage tools provide a simple and efficient method to alleviate muscle tension, relieve pain, and induce relaxation in the convenience of your home. Choosing the right self-massage tool can greatly diminish daily stress, post-workout soreness, or chronic pain. Different tools are provided to meet various needs, including advanced percussive massage guns, foam rollers, and massage balls. Choose the perfect tool for your requirements and start reaping the rewards of self-massage immediately.

[littledata]

@princington's amazing art brought me back to this fic so have a little extra for them.

There are many, many terrible things about dating Beatrice.

For example: she manages to wake up at six AM every single morning to go jogging and comes home looking sweaty and sexy while Ava is still dealing with bedhead. She's also organised to the point of insanity and remembers every important date, even the ones Ava didn't realise she knew (like the date she opened the coffee shop. They hadn't even met for fuck's sake), and manages to swoop in with a thoughtful gift or kind word to mark the occasion. Meanwhile, Ava is still scribbling DON'T FORGET DENTIST - TUESDAY?? on the back of her hand like a high schooler.

And if all of that wasn't horrible enough, even after almost a year of dating, Beatrice can still roll up the cuffs of her sleeves or adjust her glasses or recite some complicated piece of research, and Ava winds up hopelessly turned on in public on the regular.

It sucks, actually. Ava's life is awful.

None of that is the worst part of it though. The worst part of dating Beatrice, who is sexy and thoughtful and intelligent, is that she's fucking impossible to buy gifts for.

Beatrice doesn't actually want anything is half the problem. She reads a lot of books but she mostly checks them out from the university library. She drinks a lot of tea, but Ava runs a coffee shop. If her girlfriend wants tea, she has a store room full of it. Other than that, she mostly likes crosswords, the gym, her friends, and… well. Ava.

It's making planning for the first birthday Beatrice has had since they've been together exceptionally stressful. Particularly since Ava knows for a fact that Beatrice's parents believed in a "socks and school supplies" style of gift giving which, as far as she's concerned, barely even count.

"What are you getting Bea for her birthday?" she whispers conspiriatorially to Camila one Saturday afternoon in Mary and Shannon's back yard. Beatrice herself is bouncing the baby on her knee and debating some obscure scientific hypothesis - something about mold. Ava is surprised to find she actually has an opinion on the topic. Probably all those mold documentaries.

Camila snorts, "Have you just figured out she's impossible to buy for?"

"Yes," Ava stresses, "C'mon, what are you getting her? And if it's really good I'm stealing your idea."

"Oh no." Camila shakes her head, "It took me all year to think of something. You're on your own."

"Cam." Ava tries her best pleading, puppy dog eyes. They don't work nearly as well on Camila as they do on Beatrice.

"Ava." Camila pats her hand comiseratingly, "Just get her what every self-respecting lesbian wants for their birthday."

Ava frowns, "Power tools?"

Camila smirks, "Strap-on and lingerie."

So that conversation was entirely useless - mostly because Ava already owns more than enough of both those things and they sort of seem like a gift for both of them more than just Beatrice. And more than anything else, Ava wants her girlfriend to feel special. Like she's worth something great that's for her and only her.

Shannon is her next port of call. Ava corners her in the kitchen where she's refilling drinks and, probably pre-warned by Camila, looks entirely unsurprised to be accosted.

"We normally order some of the gross British candy she likes," Shannon informs her. "And before you even try it - she knows that's what we get her every year, so don't try and steal the idea."

Ava groans despondently, "I'm hitting a wall here. What the fuck do you buy for someone who doesn't actually want anything?"

Beatrice does always say that her best friend is unreasonably logical and practical in her advice. For the first time, Ava understands her plight when Shannon shrugs and says, "Have you tried asking her?"

With nothing else to do, Ava tries. Admittedly, she probably picks a bad time to do it: she's shirtless and sitting cross-legged on their bed while Beatrice massages lotion into the new tattoo on her shoulder. Bea's fingers are gentle and thorough and very, extremely distracting.

"Hey," Ava says a little breathlessly, her eyes closed, "What do you want for your birthday?"

Beatrice, because she is Beatrice, says, "You don't have to get me anything."

Typical. This is why dating her is so difficult. "Obviously I do," Ava points out. "For my birthday you took me to a theme park even though it's your idea of actual, literal hell." Bea had even bought and worn a t-shirt that said "I RODE THE BIG ONE". Camila has the photograph framed in her office.

"Not actual, literal hell," Beatrice argues, "I enjoyed that you had fun."

"There's really nothing you want?" Ava asks.

Disappointingly, Beatrice's fingers stop their movement and she puts a cap on the lotion, moving off the bed behind Ava. "Is this what you were whispering with Camila and Shannon about earlier?"

"Maybe. They weren't helpful."

Beatrice's smile is affectionate, "They never are." She leans in to kiss her, her hand landing on Ava's bare shoulder and skirting over her neck, "I'd like to spend my birthday with you. That's all."

Ava wraps her arms aroud her shoulders and sighs, "Dating you is the worst."

"Mm, awful," Beatrice agrees, kissing the corner of her mouth and then her jaw. "Shall we break up?"

"Yep." Ava turns her head to press their lips together again and uses her distraction to lie back, pulling Beatrice down on top of her. "We're over."

(On her birthday, they drink tea in bed and do a crossword puzzle with Ava's head on Beatrice's shoulder. Later, they wander through a museum eating wine gums and holding hands. At Shannon and Mary's place, Beatrice unwraps the cordless drill that Ava bought for her.

"Thank you," she says, "It's just what I wanted.")

(Ava saves the strap-on and lingerie for later.)

[headingalaxys-spicy]

In your really smart reader post, it seems like the two of them are really sexually frustrated due to the woman evading them and them finding it hot at the same time. This is kind of embarassing to ask, but I must know!

Do they use their imaginations and relieve themselves to her? Or wait until he finally gets her to satisfy all that pent up sexual urges? And if they choose to do it themselves for now, how do they imagine making love with her to be like? If they choose to wait, what are the things they prepare for her when she eventually becomes their woman?

Hahaha, nothing embarrassing about your ask. These are super normal questions to have! I hope I do manage to answer it properly enjoy!

Anyway, this post is kinda spicy! So reader discretion is advised.

I can say that one has more self-control than the other.

America

Alfred has far less self-control when it comes to his sexual frustration. It’s common for him to have a nightly (and sometimes even in the morning) ritual to masturbate for an hour or so to your picture, a piece of clothing he or one of his agents managed to steal or that you left behind in your venture to evade him. He will utilize your panties or bra to massage his hardened member. Other articles of clothing he will either use as a towel to catch his seed or go to bed with it as he inhales your perfume & sweat. 

Alfred is desperate to be able to pin you to a wall and have you beg for mercy. 

How dare you leave him longing like that? 

He gets off to the fact that his much larger muscular body could overpower your smaller & weaker one. Alfred thinks about the outfits he wants to wear as he rails into your ruthlessly. From his various military uniforms, police uniforms, pilot captain, whatever conveys “power” he’s fucking you in it while you’re 100% nude and vulnerable. 

When you get caught, I hope you are prepared to lose the ability to walk for a while. 

England 

Even though his sexual frustration builds like a kettle that’s being brought to a boil, he will not allow himself to have that satisfaction until he actually has you in his arms. Like a refined gentleman, he wants to be adequately satiated and not give in so easily to his primal urges. Waiting for him means greater satisfaction later. 

In the meantime, Arthur will read his erotic novels to heighten the excitement of having you. He will take notes from his kinky novel: which positions, tools, phrases, and how to set up the perfect mood, etc. He will be trying to use it all. Arthur will get to shop for all of the best things to have the first love-making session blow your mind. Such things include but are not limited to: fuzzy handcuffs, chains, and lingerie that matches your eyes to a set that matches his olive green military suit. (Just like Alfred, he gets off on the being in ‘power’ dynamic) 

When he finally has you, Arthur is going to facilitate fucking you like an orchestra rehearsing to play at Cadogan Hall. It will be passionate, sweaty, & will leave you breathless. Arthur will even have the perfect playlist, dinner/dessert, and aftercare planned out after he’s done roughly shagging you. 

I hope you have the type of stamina to keep up with him. 

[plutosunshine]

How to activate your Sun?

Why is it so important to keep your Sun shining? Sun is the center of the universe and it is the general energy in our chart. It is our energy, talents, and self-expression. When we don’t activate our Sun, life is miserable and boring, we don’t shine and don’t attract luck and happiness.

How to understand that your Sun needs to be activated?

1. You feel no interest in life

2. Depression, negative energy

3. Lack of energy

4. You are miserable

5. You can’t express your talents

The sign and house of our Sun can help us to understand what inspires us and gives the energy. I offer an in-depth analysis in the reading “How to awaken your Sun?”.

Aries Sun

Aries is the first zodiac sign so you are born to start something. It is not necessary to continue or finish but you need to express your creativity and talents at starting something new. Don’t be afraid of expressing your childlike energy! It is your essence and when you suppress that, your energy is wasted. You need to stand up for your interests and goals. If you don’t like conflicts and don’t fight for your opinions, your Sun is not activated. Aries Sun is activated by sport, business, self-employment, sex, etc.

Taurus Sun

Taurus Sun is born to live beautifully. Surround yourself with aesthetic and beautiful things. Everything has to be balanced and calm. Of course, don’t forget about the rest of the chart. Meditation, art, nature – all of that is so good for your Sun. Also, Taurus Sun is born to enjoy life. Delicious food, massage, beautiful house, money, etc. Don’t restrict yourself, it is your essence to enjoy your life. Also, Taurus likes cuddling so much!

Gemini Sun

If you hear all the time “why do you start something and never finish?”, just ignore that. They don’t understand your soul. Because Gemini is born to be everywhere and to learn a little bit from everywhere. You are an explorer. You need to learn new information, get experiences and share it. Gemini Sun people are very good bloggers because Gemini needs communication and sharing information. You are the best couches and sellers. Make new friends, read books, take new courses, etc.

Cancer Sun

Sweet soft Cancers! I hope life didn’t destroy that in you. You need to admit nurturing side of yourself. Cancer is so vulnerable sign that it tends to close off because of traumatic experiences. However, you need to express your love and care to the people you love! That is your essence and if you allow yourself to express that, your life will become better and better! Doing something useful to others is so good for your Sun. However, don’t sacrifice too much! Also, all Cancers MUST be in psychology or astrology, tarot, etc. Because Cancer needs to feel and understand and these tools are the best for that. Also, it is good for Cancers because one of the main goals in their life is to heal the inner child from childhood traumas. If you do that, you will be able to help others to heal themselves, which is also good for your Sun.

Leo Sun

Sun rules Leo so it is extremely important to express yourself. You are a born queen/king and if you don’t express that it can affect your life badly. You have so many talents! And you MUST show them to others! Also, don’t pay attention to what others say about you. You need to focus only on yourself. The producer didn't pick you? That’s his loss, not yours. Trust yourself and make yourself the center of the universe. You MUST shine. Of course, creative hobbies, performances, dance, acting, games, fashion – all these areas are good for you. Also, I would like to mention that it is important for you to be the ONLY one in the relationship (especially if you have Leo Venus). Love triangles kill your energy. You must be the one and the only one.

Virgo Sun

Everybody is tired of people saying that Virgo is a hard-worker. BUT! If you are not working on something, you will direct all your perfectionism and critics to the people around you. And nobody wants to be criticized by Virgo! The best choice for Virgos is to work hard on something important for the others. Whether it be medicine or even esoteric healing. It is important to lead a healthy lifestyle. Also, if you have pets that’s awesome! Helping a pet’s shelter is so good for your Sun! When you don’t have money it kills your energy. That’s why Virgos need to work all the time. They feel secure with money. Also, it is obvious but if you have everything in order in your home and clean it often, your Virgo Sun will be happy!

Libra Sun

Of course, partnerships. We can’t deny that. Any kind of partnership helps your Sun to shine. Whether it be a romantic relationship, friendship, or business. By the way, business and negotiations are good for you! All one-to-one connections bring you luck. For example, the interview. One person communicates with the other. Also, dear Libras, aesthetics! You ARE aesthetic and you need to surround yourself with everything elegant and beautiful. Museums, luxury restaurants, exhibitions, fashion, etc. You are so creative and these talents need to be expressed, so acting, dancing, painting, etc.

Scorpio Sun

Scorpios, my dear warriors. You were born to save people from themselves. You ARE wisdom and you have to navigate all of us in the direction of healing. You have been healing yourself your whole life and this skill lets you help others with that. Your intuition and tendency to transform make you a very powerful person. Astrology, psychology, occult, esoteric – all of that is your tools. You use them to find the truth beneath all the lies. Extreme sports and everything risky may be useful for your Sun. Healing yourself is the most important thing that lets your Sun shine.

Sagittarius Sun

Born explorer! Your Sun shines when you get new experiences. Your goal is to inspire others to explore the world. You are a great advisor. You have so much charm that people adore listening to your stories and learning from them. Learning languages, history, foreign cultures, travel, teaching, coaching – all that gives the energy to your Sun. If you suppress your sense of freedom it makes you miserable. You MUST feel free and independent! Inspire the world and it will inspire your Sun!

Capricorn Sun

Capricorn is born to build and rule. It is good to have a business (or many businesses) or to be a boss. You are a BORN boss. Power and recognition are very important to you so if you want to activate your Sun, you need to have a long-term goal. From the bottom to the top. I am sorry to tell you that but discipline and rules are so useful for activating your Sun. Of course, don’t forget about the rest of your chart. Be the boss of your life, build something and get recognition!

Aquarius Sun

Dear Aquarius, stop hiding your craziness! Yes, you are crazy and genius. Please don’t hide your creative and innovative thoughts from others. Aquarius is born to make the new out of the old. You are a trendsetter, you see the future. Maybe you have (or had in childhood) vivid dreams. Astrology, science, technology, IT, charity, and organizations – all these areas help you to activate your Sun. It is important to socialize, make friends and be in touch with them. Also, you should express your uniqueness whether it be purple hair or a weird tattoo. If you have something like that in mind don’t suppress this desire. Aquarius is here to challenge and provoke society. The era of Aquarius is yours! You activate your Sun when you participate in organizations that struggle for someone’s rights. Fighting for the highest good is so Aquarius!

Pisces Sun

Pisces is the last zodiac sign so it collected all the good and all the bad from 11 zodiac signs. You have a little bit from every sign and you should express that! Water energy = esoteric, spirituality, psychology, art, music. All these areas are a MUST for you (you can choose one of course). You have talents in these areas and it is a crime to hide them. You would be a good blogger because you are so artistic and creative. And of course, CHARITY. Sacrifice is the essence of this sign. However, be aware of your surroundings. Some people may use your kindness. Helping others activates your Sun. Also, all the fields that include healing of some sort. Whether it be nursing or astrology.

[mellosdrawings]

What do you use to draw with? Like what device and drawing app? I finally graduated high school and want to get back to drawing and maybe start posting it but I wanted some advice

Hi~

I'm just gonna go and give you my full setup (plus health advices coz trust me they're important).

These days I use an IPad Pro 11" and Procreate. My friend has the bigger version but I hurt my elbow using it because it made my moves too big, so I settled for the littler version. I suggest you chose based on your feelings for that. If you want a bigger screen to see more of your work, it's perfectly valid.

If you do take those two, I suggest you also take the ICloud save. (I have the 200Go save and that's only 3€ a month, but the 50Go save in free!) Should your IPad eventually break, you'll be able to retrieve ALL your art files from the Cloud, which is a huge lifesaver!

(I used to use a simple computer plus graphic tablet plus Adobe Photoshop, but it kept crashing so much that I had one too many rage quits. Plus it's super expensive since it's subscription based, and nowadays they take your art from the Adobe Cloud to feed their AI, so I can't really recommend that. Photoshop is an excellent tool but the direction Adobe is taking does NOT suit me.)

For brushes I just use the default Procreate Pencil. For the eraser I use Syrup, which is found in the default Inking Brush set.

My base canvases are 4000x4000px with a DPI of 300 (I suggest you improve the DPI if you do illustrations or really precise work. I only do little fanarts and comics with that DPI). For posting online please be careful to chose an RGB color profile (I use the default Display D3). If you ever want to print though, you should chose a CMYK color profile (I use the Generic CMYK Profile then).

Now back to the real world! I'm going to strongly suggest you make sure your paper/computer/screen is at least at an angle, at best right in front of your face. The least pressure you have to put on your neck (bending), the better it will be. If you do traditional art, I'll suggest actual art tables that you can adjust in size and angle. Here's mine.

To prevent any pain in my thumb I use one of those hold-helpers thingies kids use to hold their pens properly! It increases the size of the grip which prevents from holding the pen too tight (trust me, it's important). You can also find special tape to roll around your pen if you need an even bigger grip.

I wish I had a proper desk and chair because that will also be very important for your posture and health, but rn I'm not in my own flat so eh. What I'll encourage you to do instead are stretches and exercises BEFORE and AFTER an art session. Fingers, wrist, elbow, shoulder, back, neck. If you want to avoid medical costs (masseur, kine, osteopath) you need to take great care of your body. You can also find little self-massaging gadgets in sports shops to help with your muscles.

(Talking from experience there. I'm only 25 and I already had to undergo surgery on my writing wrist because I f*ed up. Your health is important!)

I'm aware most of those are extremely expensive to get (it took me half a year of intense working and savings just to get the IPad) but I've found that they were 100% worth it in the end. It's alright to get things little by little if you feel they are going to be important for you. I strongly suggest you invest in your health first though!

Once you have decided on your preferred setup, I guess the only thing left to do is train, experiment and have fun!

I think that's all? If you need more advices on setups or art or whatever, I'd be happy to help, my DMs are always open!

Also congrats on graduating highschool!

[zyxwl2015]

Excerpts from Lando Norris biography - part III

(There aren't too many behind-the-scenes stories anymore — mostly stating things everyone knows, F1 was postponed due to Covid, online racing happened, F1 resumed, Lando did this in this race, Lando had a new teammate, Lando moved to Monaco, etc etc)

Every one was extremely happy for Lando after his first podium at Austria 2020, including Trevor Carlin: "He is doing everything right and the results are coming and I am very proud of him" and "Lando is the nicest person you could ever meet"

Charlotte recalled in Eifel GP 2020, the marketing team's office was right next to the drivers' room and the walls were paper-thin, and —

We were working in the marketing office and we could hear this giggling from the drivers’ room next door… I went into their drivers’ room to speak to them and they were both lying on the massage bed watching YouTube or Instagram videos together. We all started pissing ourselves laughing at first, but I then said to them, “What the fuck are you doing? Why aren’t you in the garage? Everyone is looking for you!” I was like an ogre telling them off all the time. But that was the point where I and some others in the team realised that they actually enjoyed spending time together.

(Oh my Carlando heart 🥰)

Going into the 2021 season, he started to become more strict with certain things, especially diet and training: he stopped eating pizza, started to do more training and running (even though he "still hates it with a massive passion"), etc, to step up his performance. By summer break there's a noticeable change physically from when he first entered F1

Charlotte on Lando at that point:

When Carlos left, I think Lando got a bit nervous again, because he was a bit like, “Well, this guy’s obviously won seven races. He’s a known quantity, and he’s got a really good reputation.” I felt like Lando’s confidence had grown so much over the two years he had with Carlos. When Carlos left and we signed Daniel, Lando was a bit like, “I’ve really got to step up.” That was when I noticed that Mark, his manager, and Jon, his trainer, were building a positive environment by explaining that Norris had all the tools and experience and should not be putting pressure on himself… I used to call him kiddo, in fact I still do, but that was the time when I thought this guy actually could be really good and it will be really interesting to see the comparison. Some thought Dan would just come in and absolutely smash him, but he didn’t. You could certainly see a change in Lando, just the way he carried himself, the way he spoke, his whole demeanour. He was just so much more confident in himself while being self-deprecating.

(I love Charlotte 🥹)

Charlotte on Lando and Daniel's relationship:

At first, they were both definitely trying to suss each other out. We never thought they would not get on, but they just didn’t spend any time together… There was never any animosity between them, it was just they didn’t hang out. Andreas Seidl would have a meeting with both drivers before the race every Sunday. It’s called a “pre-race objectives meeting” and he would basically lay the law down and tell both drivers they are in it together. You drive for the team, no driver is better than the other, no one gets preferential treatment, you do what’s best for the team result, that kind of thing… Both drivers were team players and we needed that because we knew we were struggling and that Ferrari would be back up there again. Both of them then started spending more time together in engineering meetings and worked really hard on it. I can’t fault either of them. Both their work ethics are just unbelievable … but they started to work together quite a lot and from then, their relationship started to change and they started to get on really well.

McLaren keeps the Monaco 2021 trophy (as always), so Lando keeps the presentation box "because it is the coolest thing, a bespoke Louis Vuitton number" (😂)

Charlotte on Lando's relationship with McLaren team members:

He had worked with the boys for a long time by now, but he knew everyone, not just them by name, but their girlfriends, their wives, their kids, their families, their situation. He’d take the team out bowling or for dinner. I think he really understood the value of trying to galvanise people around him and that made him part of the furniture.

After the accident when he got mugged at Wembley Stadium, Charlotte messaged him saying she's so sorry. The whole McLaren team was being very supportive as well. When Lando went to the factory, he was really subdued, "he was worried because he thought he was going to be in trouble because of the watch getting stolen." Ofc Charlotte gave him a big hug

Charlotte described how different the mood was post Monza vs post Russia, especially during the last few laps, "It felt like the slowest time of my entire life, like watching a slow train crash."

[rumour] Ben Hunt says according to rumours, the contract he signed in mid-2021 (just before Monaco GP) was worth £6m a year, the one he signed beginning of 2022 (current one) was £50m for 4 years

[The End]

[pulisicsgirl]

flustered assessments - christian pulisic

summary: Y/N is a nursing student struggling to study for an assignment and Christian offers to help out by letting her do an assessment on him; super fluffy, established relationship

pairing: Christian Pulisic x nursing student!reader

word count: 2.4k

notes: this is the first fic that I'm posting on here!!! :) this fic is entirely self-indulgent and I wrote it during finals week last semester, so it might be super niche, but I still thought it was cute so and figured I would share it. please tell me what you think!

You held your head in your hands as you hunched over the desk, all your work laid out before you. Your mind seemed to spin as you tried to take in and retain all of the information written in your notebook and printed on the sheets of paper before you. You were preparing to head into final exam week as a junior-year nursing student, and you were due to perform a graded head-to-toe assessment the following morning. Nerves wracked your body as you tried to go through the checklist you had to complete (from memory). You wiggled your fingers as you read through your notes, trying to dispel some of the anxiety you were feeling.

You felt a light pressure on your back and a kiss was placed on your neck, just below your ear, as Christian leaned his body over you and wrapped his arms around your torso.

He had come over earlier that night so the two of you could try to spend some of his very limited time off together, but when he realized how much work you had piling up before exams and how stressed you were about studying, he immediately shifted gears, encouraging you to do whatever work you needed to and doing his best not to distract you. It meant a lot to you that he recognized how important your studies were to you, and that he didn’t try to convince you to spend time with him instead. You had wanted nothing more than to spend the evening wrapped in his arms under a blanket on the couch, watching a movie until you drifted into a peaceful sleep—honestly. But with so many tests looming in your near future, you knew you wouldn’t be able to relax and focus on spending time with him—and he realized that too. So for the last few hours, he has wandered in periodically, ensuring that you had snacks and took breaks every so often. He talked you down from your anxious thoughts, reassuring you that you were capable of the things that you had set out to do.

“Hey, baby. Just checking in,” he said, almost at a whisper. “How are things going?”

You sighed softly, subtly leaning back into his chest and groaning in frustration. “I feel so overwhelmed,” you whined, rubbing the palms of your hands in your eyes. “I feel like I’m just reading the same information over and over again and not retaining anything.” Christian stood up straight, using his fingers to gently massage your shoulders as you tilted your head back to look at him. His faced held a sympathetic look as he stared back down at you.

He thought for a moment. “What are you working on right now?”

“I’m trying to prepare for the head-to-toe assessment I have to do in the morning,” you gestured to the equipment you had laid out on the desk. Your stethoscope, blood pressure cuff, and pen light, among other tools, lay unused on the surface.

“Would it help if you actually went through the assessment instead of just reading about it?” he asked softly.

You pondered his words for a brief moment. “Yeah, actually,” you looked back up at him. “It might.”

A grin broke out on his face, accentuating the soft dimples in his cheeks. “You could do it on me!” he replied with excitement. He had always loved seeing you practice any of your nursing skills. He often made remarks about how you were his “smartie pants” that was going to save lives one day, and it warmed your heart each time. Any time he would feel an ache or pain, he would come to you to ask what was wrong, and whether you had the answer or not, you knew that he secretly just loved when you would dote on him and try to take care of him.

“Really? Are you sure?” you asked. He just nodded, bouncing lightly on his toes in excitement.

“Where do you want me?” he asked with a grin. You told him to go sit on the bed while you grabbed your tools and a couple sheets of paper. You placed them on the bedside table and tried to mentally prepare yourself to do the assessment.

“Okay, so…” you looked up at Christian’s face which only held a small, eager, and supportive smile. He was sitting up at the top of the bed with his back against the headboard. In an instant, you felt a wave of anxiety as you thought about how unprepared you felt for this assignment. You pulled on the fingers of your right hand, a habit that you often did when you were nervous.

Christian picked up on this, leaning forward to grab your hands with his own. “Hey, baby. Relax,” he spoke softly, as though you were a small, scared woodland animal that he was doing his best not to spook. He gently pulled you forward, uttering a soft, “c’mere” as he pulled you to sit on his lap, with your legs on the outside of his so you were straddling him. He placed both of his hands on your cheeks, looking intently into your eyes. “It’s just me and you here. You can do this. And you can run through it as many times as you need to tonight. I’ll be right here.” His thumb stroked your cheek gently. “Okay?” You felt butterflies in your stomach at his words as you nodded and glanced down. Even after as long as you had been together, he never failed to get you flustered.

You took a deep breath, trying to center yourself and focus on his encouragement, and he moved his hands from your face, settling them on your hips. You decided to just stay where you were to do the assessment—it wasn’t the most conventional way to assess a patient by any means, but you felt better when you were close to him. You leaned over to the bedside table, grabbing your notebook and a pen so you could jot down notes as you went.

“Okay,” you paused, collecting yourself. “Hi, my name is Y/N, and I’m going to be your nurse today.” You glanced up to Christian’s face, feeling almost giddy at the amused look on it. “I need to do a head-to-toe assessment on you, is that okay?” You mentally went through the elements of the introduction that you needed to fulfill, checking each one off in your head as you went.

Christian replied with a “yes, ma’am,” and a short nod.

“Okay, can I get your name and date of birth?”

“Christian Pulisic. September 18, 1998.” You had already begun writing down the answer before he started speaking, already sure of his answer.

“Do you know what day of the week it is?”

“It’s a beautiful Thursday evening.”

You giggled at his response, feeling a little more anxiety flutter away. “Do you know where you are?”

“Your apartment?” he questioned, not exactly sure how he was supposed to answer. You just nodded to show that he was fine.

“Alright, and do you know why you’re here?”

“To help my beautiful, genius girlfriend study for her exams so that she can ace this tomorrow and go on to become the most brilliant and talented nurse this world has ever seen.” You felt the heat rush into your cheeks at his response. You looked up to his face and found an earnest honesty in his eyes as he grinned at you. You shook your head with a laugh, turning back to your notes.

“Are you in any pain?”

“No.”

You began taking his vital signs, pretending to take his temperature and oxygen saturation since you didn’t have the equipment to do those. You took his blood pressure and counted his pulse and respirations, noting them on your paper.

“Everything normal?” he asks.

“For the most part,” you smiled. “Your heart rate is kind of fast, but I usually don’t take my patient’s pulse while I’m sitting in their lap, so that could have something to do with it.” He smiled sheepishly, dropping his chin to his chest as he laughed at himself. “And your blood pressure is just a hair high, but with as active as you are and how well you eat, I wouldn’t worry about it. It probably just has to do with the heart rate thing, too.”

You continued assessing him to the best of your ability, asking him questions about how he had been feeling and checking his eye movement with your pen light. Christian continued trying to make you laugh as he followed all of your directions. When you asked him to puff out his cheeks to test one of the cranial nerves, he crossed his eyes, acting as goofy as he could.

You began asking him questions related to his heart, asking if he had experienced any chest pains or dizziness. You put your stethoscope in your ears and, as you did so, Christian leaned forward off of the headboard, pulling his shirt over his head quickly, and discarding it on the floor. You felt the heat flooding your face once again as you studied his bare abdomen.

“Like what you see, Nurse Y/N?” he wiggled his eyebrows as he spoke.

You rolled your eyes, laughing anyway. “Just shut up and lean back,” you giggled, pushing his chest. You placed the stethoscope to his skin, listening to the soft lub-dub, lub-dub of his heartbeat, a soft smile passing over your face. It was one of your favorite sounds—his heartbeat. It was a comforting sound, knowing he was alive and well. You had fallen asleep many times, head pressed to his chest as the steady rhythm lulled you to sleep.

You jotted down some more notes as you took the stethoscope out of your ears, turning back to look at him. “Do you have any history of smoking?” you asked with a smile, as you already knew the answer.

“No,” he smiled.

“Alright, have you experienced any coughing recently? Any difficulty or pain with breathing? Any shortness of breath?”

“Well… a little bit,” he pondered, tapping his finger to his chin. You quirked your head to the side, raising an eyebrow at him in question. Why hadn’t he mentioned to you that he was having trouble breathing recently? A thousand possibilities ran through your head in an instant.

“Well, you know… because you took my breath away,” he raised his eyebrows as if to say, ‘that one was pretty good, huh?’.

 You just grabbed your notebook, writing in it once more. “Patient… thinks… he’s smooth,” you spoke slowly as if you were writing the words in your notes.

“Heyyyy,” he groaned and both of you laughed.

You continued working through the list of what you needed to do, checking off each item, one by one. As you were working through the neuro section, Christian moved his hands from your hips, down to settle on your thighs, where he rubbed the pads of his thumbs over the exposed skin just below the hem of your shorts.

“Have you, um… h-have,” your breath caught in your throat, suddenly feeling flustered at the soft touch of his fingers. You swallowed hard, attempting to pull yourself together and promptly failing. You dropped your hands into your lap in defeat, letting out a heavy sigh. “You have to stop doing that.”

“Doing what?” He wore a sly grin on his face.

“You know what you’re doing,” you groaned.

He laughed at your desperation. “Come on, if you can do it in these circumstances, you can do it in any setting,” he retorted, raising his eyebrows at you. As much as you may not like it, he was probably right.

You sighed again, stretching out your back and shaking your head to try to refocus yourself.

Soon enough, you had finished your checklist, looking through your notes to ensure you hadn’t forgotten anything.

“Alright, I think that’s everything,” you smiled at him. “I diagnose you as… alive.”

“Oh, good. I was worried,” he said in an amused tone, squeezing your thigh. “Alright,” he took the checklist from your hands. “Run me through everything you would do for an assessment, and I’ll check you.”

You took a deep breath, pulling at your fingers again. One of his hand resumed it’s position on your thigh. “Okay I start by introducing myself, I get two patient identifiers and assess for alertness and orientation. Then I’ll take temperature, pulses, respirations…”

You continued listing everything you could remember, running through the assessment in order in your head.

When you reached the end, Christian beamed at you, setting the sheet of paper on the bed beside you. “You aced it. Every last thing on that list—you got it.”

“Really?”

“Every. Last. One.” He leaned forward, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. “I’m so proud of you.” Your heart fluttered in your chest as you closed your eyes, leaning your head onto his shoulder. He ran his fingers gently over your back, tracing patterns into your spine. “You’ve been studying for hours now, and you’ve got this material down. Do you feel comfortable calling it a night? We can run through it again a couple times in the morning before you actually head in to do it.”

You smiled to yourself at his supportive and caring words. You nodded, head still on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around your torso, scooting down the bed so that he could lay down, pulling you to lay on his chest. You instantly melted into him, feeling the ache in your shoulders and back as you finally relaxed.

In a matter of minutes, you felt your eyelids begin to droop as Christian continued rubbing your back slowly.

“Thank you for helping me study,” you spoke slowly, sleep already threatening to take you. “I’m sorry we didn’t get to spend much time together tonight.”

“It’s okay, baby. Next week, after you crush your finals, I’ll take you out and we can spend all the time in the world together then.”

That simple statement made you smile, giving you something to look forward to after a long week of exams.

And sure enough, Christian was right. After a night of peaceful rest in his arms, the two of you ran through the material a couple more times the next morning, and then, after you had donned your scrubs (earning several cheeky remarks from Christian about how hot you looked in them) you headed into the lab to do the assessment with your instructor and passed it with flying colors.

[thedarkmistress16]

here's some long-awaited tony food for your thots

(im serious this is 100% PWP done in like, *check watch* 6-8 hrs or so in one sitting- it's all over the place, fam)

let me know immediately if any of you want me to community label this, if that makes you more comfortable. if you want another installment (it will have actual plot i promise) just let me know. None of the used images here are mine, they belong to their respective owners, I only own my garbage writing.

Boyfriend!Steve Rogers x Girlfriend!Experienced!Unfaithful!Reader x Jealous!Yandere!Tony Stark- Repression and Suppression

and here are some messy A03-esque tags for your reading pleasure (srsly read these before continuing or you void your reading warranty):

(Lime, Lemon, G-rape, Cheating, Physical Cheating, Unintentional Cheating, Affair, Noncon, Dubcon, Forced Orgasm, Overstimulation, Fingering, Oral, Vaginal, MxF, PWP, Love Triangle, Jealousy, Third Wheel Tony Stark, Sexual Deviant Tony Stark, Manipulation, Humiliation, Dirty Talk, Swearing, Teasing, Gaslighting, Sexual Coercion, Power Play? Beard Burn, The run of shame?, Lust used as a manipulation tool, Tony blatantly misunderstands words, The horny ruins lives, Reader’s never cheated in her life ong she just misses sex, Tony is all kinds of wrong here, OOC Tony Stark, His dialogue is probably OOC sorry about that, No descriptors besides gender have fun)

...

You don’t know how this happened.

…

Okay, you do know how this happened. You and Tony stumbled upon the same floor in an otherwise empty Tower and you both plopped on the same couch shooting the shit. No paperwork for you to do and no big baddie causing a commotion in New York for the Iron Man to stop. And you may have overshared a tad about the feelings you’ve been having at his prompting about your relationship status, but hey, that’s normal, even for sober people. Everyone needs to vent every once in a while. Or overshare, or both.

What you didn’t expect, however, was your totally innocent sex conversation with Tony to turn into dirty talk. Which, alright- fair, this was Tony you were talking to, so probably not your best moment.

“It’s not like he’ll find out.” Tony’s palm rests on your thigh. “And you said so yourself, he doesn’t give you what you need.”

But thankfully, that’s when your brain started working again, and you actively began to create some space between you, with his hand falling off your leg.

“No, Tony. You know who I’m with and you know he’ll be coming back.”

Tony follows you and- what the fuck? Was this couch always this small? The palm greets your thigh again, more insistent now if the pressure was any indication.

“Can you really wait that long?”

You stare at Tony, incredulous at the turn of events. He wouldn’t- would he?

You see him smile at you before diving in for a kiss.

Wide-eyed, your first reaction is to push him off, but he practically falls on top of you, keeping you pinned there as his tongue goes to work in prying your mouth open.

You struggle, and then, well, he knew how to kiss to get what he wanted, that was for sure. It was so different from what you were used to with him, all chaste and loving. Tony used the flat surface of the appendage to massage your tongue, and- holy fuck you really forgot what good kisses felt like. Tony feels so good- so warm and passionate, that his embrace sends you into a blanketed bliss.

And as you make out, that blanket grows more and more stuffy. You lose track of time, and- well, yourself. The next time you open your eyes, you’re greeted to a shirtless and more disheveled Tony Stark on top of you, kissing down your neck, and humping his bulge against you and- oh fuck your pants were gone.

Okay, this had officially gone too far. Yes, this was hot, and yes your body was awakened from the longest dry spell ever by his kisses, but you had to try and stop this. You had to get Tony to shut this shit down, and then blame your horny self later.

But first, Operation Turn off Tony.

“Wait!” Your hands fly to Tony’s chest, pushing with effort despite wanting to melt into a puddle. “I can’t- you know I can’t-”

Okay, your voice would’ve sounded commanding if Tony hadn’t run his hands under your shirt.

And if his arm wasn’t practically glued to the damn cushions you would've had more leeway to shake him off. And if he wasn’t so stron-

Wait- one arm?

…

…oh my god why is he pushing against you?

“Oh?” It comes out automatically and your body absolutely preens at the sensation before you come back down.

Oh fuck no- now two of his fingers are inside you and you’re not sure if you can even try to hold him off now.

Think of Steve think of Steve think of Steve think of Steve-!

“Tony, mmn-m, pl-”

“Why refuse this?” He pauses to let his fingers talk and the resulting squelching has you trying to seal your mouth in protest. “Why refuse me? When the sweet release you want is right in front of you?” His fingers fall away. “And when this-” he rolls his denim-covered penis over your pussy, eliciting a groan from both of you, “cock is ready and begging to be inside you?”

There is no hope to quell your blushing at this point either, you unhelpfully surmise to yourself. But even so, you don’t let up, forcing yourself to meet his eyes.

“He’ll, ah- find out, hah, Tony.” Fucking hell it was hard to form words now, “and he w-will-”

Tony, more envious than you’ve ever seen him, snarls in retaliation. “Don’t think about him! He’s not the one who’s going to be fucking you tonight.” He takes a moment to regain his composure before adding, “don’t worry, baby. I’ll make you feel so good you can’t stand it.”

“Ton- ah!”He hit a sensitive spot inside you, and your body jolted with the feeling. “P-please...ha...” You pant, trying to control yourself as his fingers retract. Trying to think of Steve instead, and all the other reasons why you shouldn’t be doing this. Why he shouldn’t be doing this to you and how he’s currently making you tingle in too many places.

In mock concern, he inquires, “what is it, baby? I’m right here...” You swear to the highest moon that Tony Stark’s teasing is the worst kind you’ve ever had to experience in your entire life; mainly because he does it in a way that pisses you off to no end.

“I- Tony, I n-need you to-” He shushes you, leaving you more baffled. He doesn’t even know your request yet and he’s already cutting you off. The playboy slides two fingers inside your wet canal and you cry out in surprise. They slip out within the next second, not allowing you to properly process the action. He languidly laps at his fingers and you actually whine at the sight, which is literally the worst reaction you could've had. Tony hums at the taste and his eyes, holding your own, gleam wickedly as you attempt to recover.

“Oh, you need me to fuck you baby? Say no more.”

You gasp, utterly scandalized. How the fuck did he interpret a nothing sentence into that? He’s already working on unzipping his jeans and you’re quick to remedy the situation, despite your breathlessness. “No, Tony, that’s not-” A hand swiftly comes down to palm your sensitive pussy and squeezes, attempting to shut you up with desire. You’re shameful when you realize his tactic worked, as you find it elicits a sexual groan from you strong enough to make your head tilt up towards the ceiling and your back arch off the couch. Tony tuts at your wanton display.

“Don’t deny it, honey. You’re absolutely dripping for cock.” He leans in close to your ear and latches his mouth onto your neck. The man nibbles and suckles enough to probably leave a mark before playfully biting your earlobe and whispering, “and I’m more than willing to provide that relief.” A small part of you finds it ironic he’d use the word willing when you haven’t vocally confirmed it in this case.

When he’s fully sheathed inside you, he sits still for a minute, groaning at the feel of you. Tony then starts circling his hips, not thrusting in the slightest, and at this point you’ve had enough of his games. If he wants to do this so badly then so be it. “No teasing…” you huff unpleasantly.

“Hmm? What was that?” His member is still nudging against the ridges of your vaginal walls, causing your lower body to spasm and tighten at random intervals.

“If you’re going to fuck me then actually fuck me.” You make your voice harsh to get your impatience across, keeping your gaze even. Tony simply winks and wastes no time setting a pace inside you, smirking pleasantly as your body shifts from his thrusts. He licks his lips at the sight of your breasts bouncing underneath your shirt and impatiently forces the fabric up to your neck to squeeze at one. 

You close your eyes and furrow your brows, focusing your efforts on meeting Tony’s thrusts and tightening your pelvic muscles frequently to help his orgasm along. Judging by his strained moans, the fruits of your past lovers' labor seem to be working. He starts to shudder and you beam with pride.

Jackpot.

That is until he yanks himself out of you completely, struggling to hold himself over your body.

“Mngh, hah- baby,” he laughs in between ragged breaths, “let’s not spoil the fun too early, now…”

Tony then switches to playfully dragging his cock along the splayed seam of your lips, right over your spasming hole, and you wouldn’t have been able to hold in that unholy moan if you tried.

He flips you over without a word, leaving you disoriented with an “oof,” as he re-positions you to make your ass hang lewdly in the air. Tony swats one asscheek and your hands scramble to find purchase before he tries something else, which you seldom find in the firm material. Another mocking sound escapes his throat at your reaction and you turn your head to glare at him.

“Could have given a girl a warning, y’know?”

“Well, sweetcheeks, I can’t very well tackle this raging problem unless I approach it from all possible angles~” His eyes rove over your new position admiringly. “And this view is definitely worth the effort.”

He winks at you, smirking all the while. You refuse to react, deadpanning, before giving up. “Fuck you, Stark.”

He says some other comment you don’t care about- on the lines of having patience- when something wet wiggles across your folds-

Your eyes widen. Was this a better advantage point for him to-

His tongue thrusts itself inside your walls and you lose all sense of thought, wanting to collapse into the couch already. Tony’s firm and swift in his movements, pressing the angle of his chin into your mound harshly and rubbing your sensitive areas consistently. The stiff hairs of his beard rub themselves across your clit as he leans forward and you lose all sense of yourself, screaming into the cushioned void and spasming around his mouth.

Your hips lull into a gentle rocking, you realize, when the sensations have dulled. You can still feel Tony between your legs, but licking you much more softly now. Your satisfied mews fall out of your mouth like a gentle stream, and you let yourself bask in the well-overdue afterglow.

Tony slowly parts from your pussy with a smacking sound, and you feel saliva trailing down your thighs as you whine. You hear him say the word “ready” and you hum questionably, not in the mood for words. He leans forward to kiss up your back and make a path for your ear, reiterating himself.

“You ready for me, honey?”

“Mm, you’re not-?”

“-finished? How kind of you to offer, baby. After all, I haven’t finished fucking you into forgetting him yet.”

Your brain almost fits the pieces together, already turning towards him to voice the question when you feel him line up his cock at your entrance. You don’t even bother doing anything other than bracing yourself as Tony thrusts into you, and you realize too late that you’re still too sensitive.

He’s more insistent as he fucks into you, just as his mouth, but he’s humping into all the right places despite your body singing to the point of pain.

“Ahn! O-oh!” At this point, you literally didn’t care that your face was practically being suffocated by the cushions that Tony Stark- your not-boyfriend- was pushing you into and fondling your breasts. You were about to get an orgasm on a dick you haven’t been treated to in months on top of a great orgasm, and it was quickly feeling like it was going to be one of the best ones you’ve ever had.

“Oh, fuck- yes, oh- Tony- fuck-! me!” You manage to scream out over your lack of breath, feeling his thrusts grow frantic. The determined mumbling he’s spouting over your ear becomes noise as your second orgasm crashes over you. Your ears are fuzzy but you can make out Tony proclaiming your name in ecstasy before he plops down on your back, causing your legs to fully give out.

You pant there, lying in sweat and regret, wanting to move just yet but knowing you have a lot of cleanup to do.

Tony shifts first, stroking your hair as he whispers once more, “So, was that a thorough fucking for you baby?”

Despite yourself, you laugh. Whether it was from the now spiraling guilt slowly ebbing away at your brain or that it was from the sudden feeling of loss in how to handle your new infidelity status, you didn’t know. You chalked it up to exhaustion.

Tony mumbles again, but you’re coherent enough to understand his words and nod, calmly lying there as he gets up. 

You waited until the bare ass of Tony left your line of sight before you shot up like a lightning bolt, gathering your clothes and racing toward the elevator in one fluid motion.

You impatiently return to your room to inspect Tony’s damages in front of the floor-to-ceiling mirror, trying to ignore the aftersex glow you still had. Your hands trail over your naked body, taking note of the reddened marks with each twist and turn. Yep, that was definitely a hickey.

They halt on your thighs when you feel a searing pain there and your eyes grow wide, mouth hanging open with a hiss.

Oh fuck. You had beard burn. How the hell were you going to explain that to Steve? Covering them up was one thing- but the itching pain you were going to feel?

The cum inside you suddenly shifts downward and you instinctively clench to hold it in, cringing at yourself. Another man’s mess splattered on the carpet of your and your boyfriend’s room is not what you needed right now.

Biting the inside of your lip, you hurry to the connecting bathroom and wash yourself of the sexual encounter the best you can.

[songoftrillium]

Meet The Writing Team

Hello Kinfolks! These last two months have been quiet for y'all in terms of updates, but BUSY in terms of the work being done by the sept of contributors to this project!

At the start of October I put out the call for help, saying that this project cannot succeed without the help and support of the Werewolf fandom. I'm happy to report that you as a fandom have responded phenomenally, and production on this series is now underway! These last few months have been dedicated to recruiting team members, and researching our book framework. We've about filled in the main core of the team, but are always looking for more help.

October through November has been dedicated entirely to research, both putting together a collection of citations we'll be using in this first book, and passing out initial writing assignments. This list is sure to grow in time, but for now we have plenty of work to do!

With that all said, I'd like to introduce you to the team that are showcasing the Gaians. Look under the cut to meet them!

Amy Waller (she/her)

Bluesky Page

Ms. Waller is a freelance writer and massage therapist based in not-quite Northern Virginia, and is a contributor to D.W.A.R.V.S. . Werewolf the Apocalypse was her first RPG, and she loves the themes of shapechanging as self-actualization and of trying to balance instinct and wisdom.

Amy has joined the team to depict the journals of Cryptobiologist Esme "Leaping Ghost".

Bek Andrew Evans (He/They)

Linktree Page

Mx. Evans is a freelance writer and illustrator from Jackson, Mississippi. He explores themes of mental illness, disability, abuse, poverty, queer themes and the intersection of these statuses. He uses body and psychological horror, meticulous attention to medical details, and deep character dives as some of his favorite methods to achieve those goals.

Bek has been indispensible in book research, and will be taking his experience with M20 Sorcerer and writing for the Hearthbound, and fictitious news article citations.

Excelgarou (She/Her)

Carrd Page

She's been described as a Werewolf: The Apocalypse academic, and wears this title proudly. She labors at all hours on resources for Werewolf fans - particularly as regards aggregating otherwise obscure information - such as the Build-a-Veteran tool or (especially) the Werewolf Index Project.

Excelgarou is our lead researcher, ensuring our book citations and narrative voices remain consistent through all editions. She has also been conscripted to write the introductory passage on the World of Darkness, and to redraft the Children of Gaia.

James "Jim" E. Deeley (He/Him)

Linktree Page

Jim has been playing, running, and writing for tabletop roleplaying games since he was first introduced to them over twenty years ago. Jim has presented on the subject of writing for games since 2010, and has been contracted to write mechanics and to do character design by the likes of High Level Games, Lostlorn Games, and Renegade Game Studios, but is equally skilled at writing lore and narrative, skills honed over two decades of running roleplaying games and medieval studies, lending a deep historical context to his writings.

Jim will write the Western Concordat, showcasing the Silver Fangs, Fianna, Get of Fenris, and Glass Walkers.

Mórag (it/its)

Mòrag is a writer and botanist from Te Wai Pounamu. It writes both botanical articles and horror stories, the former to raise awareness of ecological issues and the latter to explore what it means to be human, represent trans and autistic experiences, and addiction. It's horror writing is best recognized for its use of visceral first-person perspectives, body horror, and the grotesque. It is influenced heavily by works such as the Hellraiser films and the philosophies of Georges Bataille.

It has joined our team to write the story portions of the Song of Trillium, showcasing the legend of Tawatuy.

[roadreliefwellness]

The Best Self-Massage Tools: Your Guide to Relaxation and Relief

In today's fast-paced society, finding time for a professional massage therapist can be challenging. Fortunately, the best self-massage tools offer an easy and effective way to reduce muscle tension, ease pain, and promote relaxation within the comfort of your own home. Selecting the appropriate self-massage device can significantly reduce daily stress, soreness following workouts, or chronic pain. Various tools are offered to cater to different needs, such as high-tech percussive massage guns, foam rollers, and massage balls. Select the ideal tool for your needs and begin experiencing the benefits of self-massage right away.      

[sanjisblackasswife]

Sanji NSFW Alphabet (Fem!Black Reader in Mind)

A= Aftercare (what is he like after sex):

Sanji actually loves aftercare a bit more than actually having sex. After being so vulnerable and intimate with each other he loves nothing more than to kiss and massage any areas he was a bit rough on your body. He loves the feel and sound of the last moan you let out after slowly pulling out as he passionately kisses you while still coming down from your high. He swears it feels like he’s on cloud 9 when he feel the vibrations of your pretty noises in his mouth. Once you both are cleaned up and finally drifting to sleep, pillow talk is his favorite thing and that’s when he feels a bit more open to share about himself. Most of his secrets were shared with you right after sex because it’s his way of expressing his level of trust and love with you. Aftercare also consist of snacks he made before hand, your favorite drink, and depending on what you’d like it will be either a bath or a quick shower. Fair warning though if your offer Sanji to bathe you it may lead to another round.

B = Body Part(their favorite body part on themselves and partner)

Sanji loves his hands. They’re something he views as his tool and now that he has you he views them as something that can not only cook you good food, but make you cum until you crumble under him.

Sanji ofc loves the female anatomy (boobs being #1), but on his girl specifically has to be her butt. He constantly catches himself staring at the way your hips sway and your butt bounces like a ball when wearing skirts and dresses. He literally gets a nosebleed just from how soft and bouncy it looks and how pretty it is being gripped by his huge hands. Every time you guys kiss he has to grip the bottom of your butt because it’s just so squishy to him. The first time he saw you in a bikini (a size too small May I add) he nearly turned into stone. Before you guys dated he always hand his hand so scarcely above your butt when touching you, not wanting to actually make you uncomfortable and grope you of course, but once you caught on to his obsession of your backside you allowed him to touch it as he pleases. Next to your breast your butt is his personal stress ball and as much as he loves to look you in the face when you cum, nothing beats seeing how wet and slippery your butt is when he hits it from the back.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically):

My poor Sanji was a touch starved virgin before he met you and only had the help of his fist to relieve himself so you best believe he cums nearly buckets now that he has you. He doesn’t enjoy actually spraying on your face though, he’d cum on (or in) any part of your body, but your pretty face. He believes you shouldn’t be defiled there of course (but anywhere else is fine because that’s his logic) One time you asked him too and he did, but after seeing the mess on your gorgeous chubby face he felt an inner guilt arise causing him to make a slight frown. However the guilt started to die down and turn into shock when he looked down to see you scoop some of it off your cheek to suck off your thumb. He was so flustered (and turned on ) that now Every time he sees you wiping and licking something off your face he feels that guilt and a tightness in his pants.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs):

Sanji actually enjoys sharing his secrets with you (mostly during the Pillow talk sessions) however there are a couple that he may end up leaving to the grave.

The first one was before you two started dating (and before the 2 year departure from each other). Sanji walked in on your playing with yourself in the bathroom. He was walking to take his nightly shower after cooking and prepping all day and he heard noises from the slightly creaked open bathroom. He peaked to see your plush thighs spread open, with one leg hung over the tub with one hand on your breast and the other pumping in and out of your fat pussy. The way your eyes were shut and your eyebrows furrowed possibly trying to imagine some scenario to make your cum faster as your middle and ring finger start rubbing tight circle on your clit had Sanji redder than a tomato. Sanji never seen such a sight with a woman before. Living with Zeff and his crew he unfortunately had some incidents walking in on GUYS, but seeing a female made him not want to look away. You looked so pretty, your body was so prefect, and the way your curls almost covered your face mostly showing your beautiful plump lips Sanji felt overwhelmed. He palmed the bulge growing in his pants after hearing such soft and low moans your tried to conceal. The show was something to watch up until he nearly choked hearing you cum and moan out “Sanji…yess Sanji….”

That was the first time Sanji came untouched.

To add on to that secret he really wants to have a mutual masturbation session with you, but he has no clue on how to approach you about it without possibly exposing himself(pun intended).

The second secret is Sanji uses your panties to jack off. We all know he’s a pervert and a panty stealer. It’s true Oda told me himself. However sometimes he tends to take his pervertedness too far and this is one of those moments: he catches himself almost elbow deep into your dirty laundry as you are taking a shower and finds your soiled panties that were the ones you came in last night when Sanji was eating you out through your panties. He take a quick smell of the fabric and it immediately hits his dick making him hard in the process. He rushes to his own room, flops on his bed and without skipping a beat, the damp crotch of your pretty thong is resting on top of his nose as he rubs one out imaging the natural scent of your is actually coming from your thick walls around his tongue and not just his imagination.

He still does it when you two are separated.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Me personally, I don’t believe anybody (except Chopper) after the post time skip is a virgin. They all lost it somehow to someone whether it was from a quickie, someone they met during the two years, or during a party they had, etc. I also think Luffy could still possibly be a virgin if I really think about canon Luffy, but I mean it’s possible he had at least ONE experience with a woman (not including his time during Amazon Lily) —-

Ykw this isn’t about him it’s about Sanji and for this post I’m going to say Sanji was a virgin when you met him. He has watched/read plenty of porn to get the jist of sex, but you know what they say about getting sex advice from porn…it’s a Nono. When you two first had sex you did most of the work considering Sanji was a blabbering mess from just seeing your pretty hands around his cock, he nearly felt embarrassed because he’s never gotten this far with a woman. He actually is a fast learner and though there were a few incidents where he may have shoved it into the wrong hole out of excitement or missed your clit entirely, he always ends up learning from his mistakes and tries to focus his attention on what you want and need during sex.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Anything that has your breast pressed up against him. If he had to choose though he’d probably say you being on top. It’s sensory overload seeing your tits jump in his face, your head swung back with your mouth gapped open moaning Sanji’s name. It’s a sight he never gets sick of. To add on he’s heavy on holding hands at least once during sex and constant kissing.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Sanji loves to keep things lighthearted and fun with you. There have been plenty of times where one of you have possibly hit your head on the headboard too hard or even made a stupid inside joke while doing foreplay which ended in playful laughter at each other. Love making for Sanji will always be one of the few thing he takes serious, but never to the point where it isn’t fun for the both of you.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He’s trimmed down there for the most part, it doesn’t grow out of control, but he has a pretty light brown happy trail similar color to his beard that you get blessed to see when he is shirtless or peaking out when he stretches and his shirt lifts. He’s asked you if you’d like him to shave it, but you quickly declined him to do such a thing. Sanji finds it cute knowing that when you’re in the mood to have sex while cuddling you’ll play with his happy trail as a signal.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

This is Mr. Prince we are talking about here. He breathes romance, when it’s special occasions (birthday, anniversary, or sometimes even after a solid win against the marines) he tends to be a bit more over the top, rose petals all over your room, long massages that lead to beautiful (and slippery) love making.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

You know that scene where Chopper goes through Sanji’s locker and it’s nothing but porn magazines? Yeah that was just Oda’s way of saying this mf jacks off ALOT. He slowed down a little after getting with you with him now really doing it if you’re too busy or when he takes showers by himself.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Praise kink go brrrr: His favorite nicknames you give him are “Pretty/Good boy”. Giving him compliments in general gets him flustered but when your dirty mouth keeps blabbering on how good his tongue feels in between your legs and how he’s the only man that can make you feel so good he nearly cums on the spot.

Especially since he knows you’re not lying.

Sonmo : This one was actually developed because of you. Since you know your busy Prince tends to not have much free time and mostly comes back to bed at a very late time, You once offered Sanji to use your body whenever you’re sleep and he is in the mood. Sanji quickly declined because he felt as if he were taking advantage of you and he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. It did take a while for him to be ok with the idea, but you allowed him the opportunity whenever he felt comfortable. He finally decided to give it a shot after he had been pent up all day and barely even saw you since everybody had to run errands. He took a shower and seen your pretty body only wearing a loose t shirt and panties, something you agreed to wear for him to sleep to give him easy access. He started off just taking off ur panties and stroking himself looking at your lightly damped pussy, but after the first two nights he needed more so he got down to eating you out for a little and now almost every other night you lightly wake up to Sanji’s cock dragging in and out of your pretty walls.

Some honorable kink mentions he has are:

Role Play (He likes pretending to meet you for the first time to go to a hotel and have sex)

Dirty Talk (More coming from you rather than him. I.e. it drives him crazy when you whisper the things you want him to do to you)

Nipple play (He loves sucking your nipples, ALOT. But one time you felt bold and trailed your kisses to his nipple and sucked. Come to find out he is very sensitive there.)

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Contrary to belief Sanji very rarely has sex in the kitchen. He knows you both are very messy so he doesn’t do much besides do a lot of foreplay with you then head back to the bedroom. He REALLY loves the bathroom though, something about shower sex gets him going.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going

Speaking of getting him going seeing you in general riles him up. He can’t help it! However if he’s busy working and you want to immediately get him hard just wrap your arms around him from behind and moan his name and how much you need him. Sanji loves catering to women so knowing you WANT AND NEED him makes Sanji’s brain short circuit, and to add insult to injury Hearing his name spill out of your beautiful lips makes his knees buckle. He swears your teasing will be the death of him.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Alot don’t think “no” is in Sanji’s vocabulary for women, but it is if you offered a threesome, to peg him, or to degrade/hurt you. He loves you, he really does but sharing you is an immediate no especially knowing you’ll probably ask for another GUY. You know he will always say no so sometimes just to make him upset you’d ask if Zoro could join which will immediately cause a small (but funny) argument and God help Zoro if he’s in Sanji’s eyesight. Pegging would also be a no, simply because he doesn’t want his butt played with. HE JUST DOESN’T. Also, we all know Sanji’s rule on hurting women. He just cannot get himself to call your out your name or leave any harmful marks on you (hickies and love bites are ok). He knows his own strength and would rather die than to possibly take it too far and hurting you whether it’s physically or verbally. Pls be understanding:(

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Sanji is a giver by nature so best believe this man will cater to your oral needs (I also believe he has an oral fixation too so W there). The first time he ate you out was messy and all over the place , but it wasn’t BAD? It was actually so good you came within less than 60 seconds, he became even better the second time. Sanji isn’t a greedy man however that can be changed after he’s gotten a taste of you. He loves being in between those thick thighs of yours and his talented tongue is a plus.

However.

He doesn’t like receiving.

Ok that’s a stretch he does LOVE it, seeing you making gagging and sucking noises on his cock drives him insane, but he feels bad for it. He doesn’t like seeing you on your knees so matter how much you tell him you like to look up at him. You stop pushing him though after knowing about his underlying issues and so you both agreed that you’ll either do 69 or lay on the bed while sucking him off and he fingers you.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

He’ll go whatever pace you want, but his default is slow, sensual and deep. He wants you to feel every inch of his body as much as he wants to feel yours. He really likes talking it slow because of your soft and thick body. He grips and kisses any roll/curve you have with each thrust and it makes your brain just melt.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

His libido is higher than a giraffe‘s booty so when you two are docked or it’s a party happening Sanji will always manage to find you and slip you off to a clean and secluded area to have his way with you. Most of it ended with you on the wall or him on his knees. Sometimes he simply does it for the rush of being caught so he internally bets himself on how fast (and how many times) he can make you cum before someone turns the corner.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

When you both first got together and had sex that very next week he felt bold enough to cuddle you and SHOW YOU in a magazine he had all the things he wanted to try with you. From positions, to role play he was an open book and it actually turned you on on how blunt he was, “Look! See this position I really wanted to try since you like when I put your legs on my shoulders! Oh please my beautiful Y/N can we try it!?”

You took him right then and there.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Homeboy got stamina and strength for days no matter how much blood he nearly lost while doing foreplay. He will cum fast the first round but he makes up for it with his tongue and fingers. A Typical night of sex with Sanji last about 30-45 minutes.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Sanji found your vibrator once on accident while trying to steal more of your panties. This was one secret he couldn’t keep because he immediately imagined all the times you possibly came on that vibrator and though he was afraid to ask you about it , you were a bit flustered, but he reassured you that he wasn’t making fun of you, but wanted to possibly add it to your sex life.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

After the 2 year break he became more bolder with his teasing with you. Before he always was a victim to your touches and gentle whispers in his ear, but now he knows how to reverse the card on you with kissing your weak spots when you least expect it and even holding his gaze on you. The teasing act never last long if your decide you wanted to fight back dirty as well.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Despite his deep, raspy voice Sanji has the prettiest moans you’d ever hear from a guy like him. They’re soft and whinny with a hint of groaning, his voice gets a bit higher than he’d like to acknowledge and he is very vocal moaning out “cum with me! Cum with me please y/n!” , “I’m close..I-I’m so close baby!” He’s not loud like Luffy, but if you were to walk by the door you’d hear a few muffled moans out of him.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Sanji can speak French very fluid. He only really speaks it when he talking to himself or cursing under his breath. You heard him a few times and it was so hot, but you were afraid to ask him about it.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Sanji is a grower not a shower (4 on soft and 6 and a half on hard). He actually was a bit scared he wasn’t going to be big enough for you the first go around, but you reassured him through your moans and praises of “You’re so big..San—AH!” And “Will it fit?” Questions. It definitely stroked his ego a bit. It’s very pretty too with one really long thick vein sticking out at the bottom. Whenever you go down on him you’re sure to lick and drag your tongue on it which brings out another pretty moan from Sanji

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Higher than a kite. His ideal day is laying in bed, eating, drinking and having sex back to back all on a rainy day. He told you this once as you were holding him late night so now that is something you hope to give him one day because he deserves it<3.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He actually falls asleep faster when you’re the one holding him. Typically he’ll do his aftercare routine, but one time you pulled him back down to the bed and just held him. He didn’t know what to do as the heat rose to his face being nuzzled on your damp breast, but he snuggled himself securely on top of your and to this day that was the best sleep he ever had.

Don’t steal or repost my writing it’ll piss me off.

[fearecia]

Putting this in a pinned post to make it easy to find/share. We all know how Tumblr is about things (and to be fair, I'm terrible and inconsistent as hell with tags).

Link to the "shoulder release" document:

Notes about this guide:

This is a WIP, and still very much in the rough draft phase. Please forgive typos/errors. I literally haven't done a single edit yet.

The document focuses on releasing shoulders as a way to treat neck tension and migraines. Seriously, just trust me. It helps.

Carpal tunnel? Tennis elbow? Golfer's elbow? AC (acromioclavicular) joint injury? Rotator cuff problems? Tight upper back? Sporadic numbness in your arm? Seriously, just try the muscles already listed. You'll likely find at least some relief. Like, if it involves the upper body, release your shoulders.

I've done my best to make this able to be understood by people without massage training. So if it seems like it's covering really "obvious" info, that's intentional. Just skip the section if you already know things.

A lot of massage therapists may balk at me telling you to dig around in your own armpit. We're taught in school to avoid the area. Why? Because there's a crap ton of nerves and blood vessels there. *Which is precisely why releasing this area is so powerful.* There's also a ton of muscle (on yes, basically everybody) here that will protect all those structures. It's honestly really safe so long as you stick to "In pain, refrain!" And read the other rules too.

90% of the time, the culprit is one of the four muscles listed (or any combination of them). If you are someone who exercises a lot/does yoga/is otherwise pretty physically active, you are more likely to fall into the 10% of people who will have their issue somewhere else/it will just be really hard to find. So bear that in mind.

Sadly, this sort of thing will probably never be a "one and done" type of deal. Most of the things we do every day steadily build up to cause problems, and you have to constantly work to undo that entropy. So save these notes for future you.

And just in case you want to know what the hell qualifies me to make this sort of document, here are my "quals."

My first career attempt was nursing. While this did not go well (doctors don't really appreciate autistic students willing to question their authority) I learned a shit ton about the body. I became a student teacher for the anatomy and physiology class because I was so good at it (and that professor used to teach the pre-med students). A&P is now literally one of my special interests.

8 years as a licensed massage therapist focused exclusively on injury therapy. I studied Rolfing techniques, and primarily used trigger point therapy, structural integration, and myofascial release as my tools. Clients liked to joke that going to see me was like seeing the physical therapist (they weren't wrong).

Some of the stuff I share is literally self taught through "following the tension" in clients bodies. Like, I developed some of my protocols. And then practiced and refined them over 100s of bodies. The goal was always the most efficient and least painful way to achieve lasting release.

I eventually destroyed my shoulder doing massage (which was injured long before this career due to an AC joint sprain gotten when I was 20). Bonus, this means I'm *very* practiced at releasing my own shoulders.

I'm now a mechanical engineer, which just means I now have the engineering knowledge to understand to the force transferrence patterns I saw in clients all the time. Kinesiology is the same thing as statics and dynamics.

Hopefully that helps put perspective into things. I'll update this post as new versions of the document come out. I have a ton on my plate right now (who am I joking; I always have a ton on my plate), so please be patient waiting for updates.

[gallifreyinstituteforlearning]

Listen I know that the medical/dental divide is one that perhaps spans multiple universes, but here are my questions: Do people on Gallifrey have to brush their teeth or are there more advanced tooth care methods? Do they produce plaque at all? Do they get dental related problems like cavities? Do children lose their baby teeth?

Gallifreyan Dental Care: The Basics

You'd think that a race as advanced as the Time Lords might have entirely bypassed the need for anything as mundane as brushing their teeth, but it's not that simple.

🪥 Do Gallifreyans Need to Brush Their Teeth?

In short: not really, but some will do it anyway. Gallifreyans are lucky enough to have teeth that are incredibly resistant to decay. Their enamel is super dense and can even repair itself, like how skin heals from a cut. So, while most of us have to spend a couple of minutes each day scrubbing away, Gallifreyans can sit back and let their biology do the work.

However, even this system has its limits. While their teeth stay in pretty good shape without the need for brushing, there's no real known mechanism for keeping their breath fresh. So, while you won't catch a Time Lord worrying too much about cavities, they still need to remedy that pungent early morning breath.

🧼 Do They Get Plaque and Cavities?

Gallifreyans are far less likely to experience tooth decay compared to humans. Their teeth are designed to withstand wear and tear, and their enamel's self-repairing nature means plaque buildup isn't much of an issue.

But let's not get too comfortable—Gallifreyans can definitely still have dental issues, and Dentists definitely have a role on Gallifrey. Fillings or crowns will still be needed, and in some cases, extraction is necessary if the damage is beyond repair.

🧒 Do Gallifreyan Childrene Lose Their Baby Teeth?

Yes, childrene who are loomed as physical kids do go through a phase of having baby teeth, just like human kids. However, not all Gallifreyans experience this, because some are loomed as physical adults, skipping the whole baby teeth phase entirely. For those with baby teeth, it's a pretty standard process—those little teeth fall out as they grow, making way for their adult set.

🦷 Gallifreyan Teeth Cleaning Devices

The following is all based on our very limited knowledge of how Gallifreyan showers work, so are more fun than real:

Say goodbye to the mundane and step into the future with Gallifreyan dental technology! Why settle for the ordinary when you can have extraordinary? Introducing the latest in oral care innovation—because your smile deserves the best the universe has to offer.

💡 LuminoMouth Cleanser: The Light of Perfection!: Tired of traditional brushing? Ditch the toothbrush and experience the ultimate in dental hygiene with the LuminoMouth Cleanser! This cutting-edge device harnesses the power of universal cleansing light to deep-clean your teeth like never before. Say hello to perfectly polished teeth, dazzling whiteness, and a breath so fresh that even the Daleks will be impressed.

🌬️ SonicFresh: Vibrate Your Way to a Healthier Smile!:Why waste time brushing when you can vibrate your way to dental perfection? The SonicFresh is not just a cleaning tool—it's a sonic experience. With high-frequency vibrations that gently massage your gums and dislodge pesky particles, this little marvel ensures your teeth are not just clean but also pristine. Perfect for those who demand more from their dental care, SonicFresh turns routine maintenance into a rejuvenating ritual. Your gums will thank you!

🌀 HydroCycler: The Ultimate Oral Spa Treatment!: Transform your daily routine into a luxurious spa experience with the HydroCycler! Combining pulses of refreshing water with invigorating essential oils, this multi-functional device does more than just clean—it revitalises your entire mouth. Feel the soothing rush of hydration as the HydroCycler flushes away the day’s grime, leaving you with a mouth so fresh, you'll feel like you've just stepped out of a waterfall.

🧊 CryoMist Refresher: Cool, Crisp, and Irresistible!: Need a quick refresh? Look no further than the CryoMist Refresher—your portable companion for minty-fresh breath in an instant! With a single spritz of our cooling mist, infused with aromatic compounds, you'll be ready to tackle whatever the universe throws at you. Perfect for on-the-go moments or after a close encounter with a Sontaran, the CryoMist keeps you cool, confident, and fresh. One spray, and you're good to go!

Get yours today and step into the future of oral care—because your smile deserves it!

Related:

📺|🧶👶What is looming and how does it exist alongside natural reproduction?: Overview of looming and its place alongside natural reproduction in Gallifreyan society.

💬|⏰💄Do Time Lords have a beauty industry?: The fashion trends and general attitudes towards clothes.

💬|⏰🏪Do Gallifreyans have grocery stores?: Food and food technology on Gallifrey.

Hope that helped! 😃

Any purple text is educated guesswork or theoretical. More content ... →📫Got a question? | 📚Complete list of Q+A and factoids →😆Jokes |🩻Biology |🗨️Language |🕰️Throwbacks |🤓Facts →🫀Gallifreyan Anatomy and Physiology Guide (pending) →⚕️Gallifreyan Emergency Medicine Guides →📝Source list (WIP) →📜Masterpost If you're finding your happy place in this part of the internet, feel free to buy a coffee to help keep our exhausted human conscious. She works full-time in medicine and is so very tired 😴

[sunshiline-writes]

A Rose Amidst Thorns #17: Dirt and Oranges

Previous | Masterlist | Next

This chapter is a bit chunky! Hope it makes up for the wait LMFAO. word count:3.9k CW: emotional whump, gaslighting, dissociation, some amnesia, ableism, POC whump, fade to black noncon, self deprecating, hand feeding, confinement, captivity, mentions of minor whump (blink and you miss it), aftermath of hand whump, disability whump, let me know if I missed anything

The hayloft wasn’t too bad. He had a thin blanket for the night time and every few days, Xavier or Jesse switched the manacle on his ankle to the other so it didn’t chafe too much. All he had to do was behave. Wake up with the sun and when he saw the top of their hair above the ladder, he waited on his knees. His knees were bruised constantly and so was what little was left of his ego. 

Xavier had started to let him down in the barn to clean the stalls, start polishing the saddles, and cleaning the tools. He’d even been given a bucket and a towel, told to clean his own blood off the barn wall. Blood stained. Migel didn’t know that before he started to scrub at the wall with cramping hands. Ah yes. His hands. His hands were, quite plainly, fucked to all hell. His left hand was better off. It always felt tight and there was a scar right in the middle of his palm, circular where it always hurt the most. His right hand. His right hand was the worst of it. It had been set as best as it could, but his fingers still looked wrong. Some of them still bent a little the wrong way. That was the least of his problems though.The problem was the way his hand was curled like he was about to make a fist but stopped midway through. Straightening his fingers outward was excruciating and curling into a real fist was also painful. 

Looking at them too much made his skin crawl and his stomach twist. So mostly he just avoided looking. But signing had become an arduous process too. It made him angry, even though it wasn’t allowed. Somehow, Xavier had been patient with him when he was figuring out how to grab the rake to clean out the stalls. Even offering advice and helping him figure out a grip. Xaviers mood swings made Miguel dizzy sometimes. 

There was a brightside. Jesse was still mostly the same. The torment was the same. Fake sweetness followed by an angry backhand to the face. Mocking the state of his hands and then softly massaging them so that they felt better. The push and pull was familiar. He was used to that. Xavier had been oddly sweet… Just sweet. Providing words of encouragement and comfort. He hadn’t hurt him in weeks. Miguel preferred him when he was playing mind games. Maybe it was because he had stopped fighting. He didn’t know. Most of the time.. He was too tired to really try and figure it out either. 

Today the rays coming through the barn window were soft and warm on his face as he awoke. He half wanted to go back to sleep. But they would have his head if he was still asleep when they came up the ladder. He pushed himself up on his cot, tried to do the exercises for his hands that Solomon had given to him. When that failed, he stared at the wall, trying to remember what got him here. 

Miguel had lost time. That much he knew. There was a period of time he didn’t remember. After Jesse.. In Solomon's bed.. He shook himself  free of the memory. It was better if he didn’t remember. He could stand missing time. It had happened many times before. To be honest, Miguel didn’t remember much of his first year here. The entirety of his thirteenth year of life was a distant blur, only recalling bits and pieces. He didn’t feel like trying to remember. It wasn’t worth it.

There were certain memories that stood out among the rest. A gun hot and heavy in his hands pointed at Xaviers face, burning pain on his chest, the smell of melted skin, and lots of darkness. He spent so much time blindfolded when he was thirteen, unaware of his surroundings. Moving through the darkness like drowning in a lake. Miguel mostly just accepted that he would never know exactly what they did to him that year. 

He did wish he remembered some things before he was taken. He had siblings once. He knew that. His sister's faces were fuzzy. Sophia had dark hair that curled into a nest on her head and was shorter than him even though she was older. Marisol’s hair was longer and more brown. She had soft hands. He remembered Jaime the most though. He was smaller than him. The smallest of the four of them. Jaime used to run around a lot. His father used to call him travieso, but he would smile while he did. Miguel assumed that was because for all the mischief his brother liked to cause, he was harmless. 

Harmless fun. When was the last time he had that? Before Xavier? Before he could remember? Miguel tried to hold onto their faces, to the way they looked when they laughed. But they were fading. All of them were fading away from him like water through his hands. The tighter he held, the more they slipped away from him. It had been eight years since he’d seen their faces or felt their touch. All of it seemed to escape from him. They never came for him. He remembered that. His parents gave him up to a devil, demiono, and never even tried. Miguel shouldn’t be thinking about them at all. Yet here he was, lost in his thoughts, wondering what life could have been if they had at least tried. 

It wouldn’t have made a difference, but at least he would have known he was loved once. Real love. Not whatever Xavier and Jesse had to show him. Jesse’s constant need to be feared and loved at the same time. Xavier’s desperateness for Miguel to rely on him for everything. None of it was real love. He wondered if the two of them ever had been held or hugged. If someone had hugged them when they needed it, would they have been different? Could they ever be different? 

Miguel was thinking too much again. He did that sometimes. His mind always moved faster and faster until they dug him into a hole he couldn’t get out of. Sometimes, when he thought too much, a sinking feeling would rise in his chest. Make him feel like a cave, hollow and dark. When he felt hollow, he would go to Solomon, help him with his chores. Make up new ones to keep himself occupied until the feeling passed. If the feeling didn’t pass, sometimes his chest collapsed. It never actually collapsed, it only felt like it did. Like all the emotions and memories were sitting on his chest at all times and sometimes they broke his bones. Then everything was painful and it was hard to breathe. 

It happened sometimes before he came to the ranch. When it did, his father would hold him close to his chest, make Miguel feel his pulse, and hum. The vibrations were always calming, following along with the pulse, his fathers steady breathing. Solomon would hold him sometimes. But now all he felt was a sinking emptiness in the pit of his stomach the longer and longer he spent alone in the hayloft. He’d grown so used to company. To the feeling of other people around. Especially Solomon. Miguel had forgotten what it was like to feel lonely. 

Loneliness was killing him. So much so that he had begun to look forward to his visits from Jesse and Xavier. Heart racing when he saw them. Even if it was just to make sure the manacle hadn’t chafed his ankle too much, give him food or water, and take out his waste bucket. Simple things like Xavier running a hand through his hair, or Jesse wrapping a hand around his throat made him ache for more touch. More anything. At least now he had jobs to do. Taking care of the barn, cleaning the saddles and boots when they came back from rides. He cherished his time down from the hayloft. Even if he was watched like a hawk all of the time. Even if no one dared to talk or look at him. 

Today was no different. When he saw the shocking red hair appear from the ladder, he got on his knees. At least they didn’t hurt anymore when he did it. Or maybe they did, he was just used to it by now. 

Jesse had a bucket in one hand, and his other hand was behind his back, hiding something. What was he hiding? It made his stomach sink to his knees too. 

Morning mutt, Jesse said, grinning from ear to ear. Walking toward him and putting down the bucket with a thud. He looked up and squinted at Jesse’s face. He seemed chipper. Happy and less angry. There was something wrong here. Miguel moved to look at the bucket but Jesse grabbed at his hair, pulling him back and making his neck arch painfully. He whined, breathing picking up. Maybe Jesse is in a mood today. 

Jesse lifted Miguel to be face to face with him, making Miguel grunt and one hand wrapped around Jesse’s wrist. 

Close your eyes and open your mouth for me kid, Jesse said, licking inside his ear again just to see him squirm. Miguel came to a realization of what he wanted from him. Was this the reason for being so chipper? He just wanted a hole to fuck? Open them and I’ll get out the blindfold and the bridle and I’ll leave you like that to do your chores. 

It wouldn’t be the first time Jesse’s done that. Left him to his own devices when he’s blindfolded. He wouldn’t doubt that Jesse would do it again. So he just closed his eyes and tried to relax. Let his mouth hang open as Jesse slowly lowered him back down, releasing his hair. Miguel only wanted to be done. Get his breakfast, do his chores, come back and sleep. That was all he wanted. The darkness was enough to try and consume his thoughts. He waited for the salty taste of sweat and come on his tongue. Nothing came. 

Not for a while at least. Miguel’s mouth was getting dry from sucking breaths in through it. Then something was placed in his mouth, soft and almost pillowy. A finger under his chin pushed slightly to make him close his jaw. Miguel bit into the citrus in his mouth, cool juice exploding over his tongue. The taste was sweet and tart, spreading into every corner of his mouth. He chewed and he let it sit a bit longer before he swallowed. He opened his mouth again eagerly, awaiting another slice. A finger tapped against his eyelids and Miguel opened his eyes, staring up at Jesse with an orange in his hand. 

He was smiling. Good right? You want some more? 

Miguel kept his mouth open, nodding. He wanted more of that orange, he hadn’t had much more than stale bread and water for his time in the hayloft. It was the sweetest thing he’d had in a while. 

Two more slices of orange were placed in his mouth and he chewed greedily. Tongue slipping over Jesse’s fingers that sullied the taste a bit with dirt. He didn’t care. Miguel no longer cared about much anymore.The shattered remains of his dignity were on the floor in front of him. Along with drops of his blood. And the last of it was being stolen from his body from fingers that tasted of dirt and oranges.

He could barely remember what it felt to be a person anymore. If he ever was one in the first place.

You’re being real good today aren’t you? Here’s some more, Jesse said, an amused smile on his face as he gently placed another slice on his tongue. With every slice, Miguel could feel himself slipping deeper and deeper into desperation. He was desperate for more of the sweetness, even if it was made slightly bitter by the taste of dirt. Dirt and oranges. Was this what had become of him? Begging for scraps. 

My uncle got them for Hen. She asked for some from the market. I managed to steal some from the crate before– Miguel didn’t see the rest of what Jesse said. He had turned away from him and Miguel whined as Jesse stepped back. Jesse wore that same grin as he did, wiping his hand on his pants to try and rid himself of the juices from the orange. I don’t have any more, mutt. If you’re real good today, maybe you’ll get some more before I take you back. 

With that, Jesse flicked out his hand. The man tilted his head slightly to the side. Clean my hand, you can have the last of the juice. 

Miguel burned with shame as he moved, grabbing Jesse’s fingers and sucking on them. 

Dirt and oranges. He wished Jesse always tasted like this. Jesse’s fingers were rough and calloused, but he did his best. Swirling his tongue around them, in between, trying to get at every last taste of orange. Jesse pulled his hand back and a trail of saliva came away, connecting Miguel's mouth to Jesse’s hand. He almost retched at the sight. Disgusted with himself.. with Jesse. With his predicament. All of it was almost too much. He was angry and tired and he just wanted to sleep. 

Instead, Jesse moved to unlock the manacle from his ankle. The skin there, angry and red. It was time to switch legs when they got back. 

The rest of Miguel’s day went in a blur. He was far away. Following instructions. Cleaning the horses, washing them as Jesse watched with mock interest. He cleaned the bridles, including the one that was reserved for him. He didn’t think about it. Miguel found that when he didn’t think as much, everything got easier. 

Brush, clean, walk. Brush, clean, walk. Taking walks with Jesse or Xavier had become normal as well. Jesse walked with him around the ranch, taking the black draft horse with them. It walked behind them at a leisurely pace. They didn’t talk. Jesse was unusually quiet and it filled Miguel with dread. Sinking into his stomach and into his legs. They turned around to go back to the bark, a breeze making the day cooler. A minor help from the brazing sun hot on the back of neck. 

Jesse waved to get his attention and Miguel looked at the other man. 

Do you ever think about them? Your family before you came here? 

Miguel frowned. He wasn’t allowed to think about them. Let alone talk about them. He narrowed his eyes at Jesse, cautious. Why was he asking this? Why did Jesse look so tired? What was happening outside the hayloft that was making Jesse ask questions that weren’t allowed? The hair on the back of his neck raised, sensing some sort of danger. Miguel shrugged in response to the question, an attempt of playing it safe. 

Sometimes I think about my mother before I came here. Do you think about yours?

A memory shattered through the fog in the back of his brain. His mother running her hands through his hair, untangling the curls. Gentle fingers rubbing his earlobes, the soft rumbling vibrations that meant laughter. The tiredness that came from being safe in his mothers lap. 

Miguel found himself nodding without his permission. Jesse nodded along with him. It was almost normal. A conversation he would have had with a friend. Precious and intimate. Miguel couldn’t let himself feel like that though. If he started to think of Jesse as more than just the person who hurt him, he’d never make it out alive. 

Don’t worry. I miss my mom too. I won’t tell Xavier. 

He took that sentence, those words and held them close to himself. Jesse was just another person who missed his mom. Miguel didn’t know what to do with that information. He could throw it out, leave it with the rest of the darkness he didn’t remember. Or he could keep it close, a reminder that Jesse was just a person. A bad person. But a person nonetheless. Miguel decided that he would save a decision like that for later. 

The man walked on. Leading the horse back to the dreaded barn, back to the hayloft. Back to where everything would be awful again. He suppressed a shudder. Keeping his head straight, not looking at Jesse. Not ignoring him but not inviting him in for more conversation either. Miguel no longer wanted to think about mothers and fathers and brothers. He just wanted to put the horse back in the stable and make it back to the hayloft in one piece. 

Something caught his eye, a movement to his left. It made his heart stop, his stomach drop. Miguel's hands tightened their grip on the lead of the horse, the pain somewhere distant. Everything else was distant. Solomon was walking out of the house, down the steps. Staring at him too. How long had it been? How long since he’d even been allowed to ask if the man was alive? Something in him compelled him to let go of the horse's lead. He took a step toward Solomon. Solomon took a step toward him. Signing something, saying something. 

His face was bruised to all hell, brown skin covered in fading green and yellow blotches. Solomon's eyes looked so tired. So fearful. Miguel couldn’t help himself. He ran toward the man. The man who helped him, who raised him, who never once left his side unless he was forced to. He took only a few steps before a hand wrapped around his waist and yanked him backwards. Solomon stopped in his tracks. Literally feet away, if Miguel reached he could almost touch him. He wanted to touch him. He wanted to hug and let himself be held by the only person who ever provided any true comfort. But the arm around his waist started to drag him backwards. 

Something in him ignited. He fought, kicking and dragging his heels in the dirt. Nails digging into Jesse’s freckled skin on his arms. Drawing blood. There was a sinking feeling as Jesse continued to drag him. Solomon took a few steps forward, reached out to him. Miguel reached back out to him and their fingers touched. A tingling spread through him and he could feel his throat tighten. He was so close, so close and he was being dragged away again. 

Was it worth it? To hug the man he considered a father? Was it worth the punishment that awaited him? His body seemed to act again without his permission as he threw his head backwards. Skull cracking against Jesse’s lips. Jesse’s arm around him loosened and he wiggled out of the hold, sprinting toward his caretaker until his arms were wrapped around Solomon’s waist. Breathing in his scent. 

Solomon always smelled of earth and rosemary. Arms wrapped tightly around him and Miguel buried his face into the man's chest. Solomon was warm and safe. Every memory he had that was ever good of his time here included Solomon. He didn’t want to let go. He couldn’t. If he did, he was afraid that he would never be able to see him again. Something in his chest broke. Shattered right into pieces. And it released out his eyes and mouth, flowing out of him like a river. Was he screaming? Wailing? There was wetness on Solomon's shirt and Miguel wailed harder. Hands curling into the soft fabric of his clothes. His whole body shuddered with his cries. 

Slowly, gently, Solomon lowered them both to sit on the ground. Miguel in his lap and curled into his shirt. Sobbing softly at the warmth of another person. Solomon slowly rocked Miguel back and forth, holding him like a small child, until his cries stopped. When he stopped, Miguel finally found the courage to look Solomon in the eye. 

Hello she’awee. You’re okay. You’re gonna be okay. Jesse’s going to take you now. You go with him. You go with him and you live and you keep on going. Do not give up yet. Please. For me. Don't you give up. Miguel took in a shuddering breath as Solomon wiped his tears. Jesse’s cold and calloused hand yanked him by the shirt into a standing position. Shoving him to move forward. Away from Solomon who stayed on the ground. He forced himself to look ahead, to not look back. If he looked back he wouldn’t make it. With every step a part of him faded deeper and deeper into itself. Until when they were back into the barn and the world smelled of horse manure again, he was no longer there. 

He was outside his body, watching Jesse march him up the ladder. Watching as Jesse shoved him down to his knees and locked the manacle around his ankle again. 

Don’t fucking.. Come back. You asshole, Jesse said, slapping him across the face. Miguel blinked and he was back in his body. Seeing it through fresh eyes. Looking up at Jesse. You with me? 

“Yes.” Miguel answered lamely with his hand, tears welling in his eyes again. A sharp pain came across his cheek. 

Don’t you dare fucking cry. You fucking ran. You went to Sol, you’re not supposed to do that you fucking shit. I thought Xavier burned those rules into you. You aren’t even supposed to mention him and you fucking ran toward him. 

Oh. Oh he really was in trouble wasn’t he? Xavier was going to kill him this time. Or worse, kill Solomon. Jesse grabbed his chin with a bruising grip and he leaned in real close. Even his breath smelled of oranges and dirt. 

I won’t tell if you act like you want it. If you’re real convincing, I might even be gentle, he said, shoving Miguel backwards on his back. The wind knocked out of his chest. Miguel instinctively crawled backward. Are you angry yet Miguel? Jesse asked as he pulled tighter on the chain that held him. You can be angry. I promise. You wanna go back out? Go see Solomon?  Come on.. he drawled, crawling over Miguel on the floor. Hovering over him. Or do you wanna stay with me?

Nausea rose in his throat and he whimpered. But he brought a hand to Jesse’s chest and looked up at him 

“I want to stay with you,” he signed slowly. One hand snaking behind Jesse’s neck to pull him close. Pressing their lips together.  

Good boy. 

And Miguel closed his eyes, leaning his head back against the wooden floor. 

He focused on the smell of dirt and oranges. He pretended that the scent was something comforting. Something easy to stomach. When Jesse was done, Miguel was hand fed another orange. He told himself he was content with that.

 He was still hungry. 

Do not give up yet. Please. For me. Don't you give up. Miguel wouldn’t, but he wasn’t sure how much left of him there would be by the time hope came round again. But maybe it would. Maybe it would and there would still be a piece or two left of him to save. He could be a better dog for someone else. For someone kind. 

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Taglist:

@demondamage @burntcoffeewhump @angst-after-dark @just-a-silly-little-whumper @tictac-murder-spaghetti @crash-bump-bring-the-whump @whumpifi

@flowersarefreetherapy @badgerwhump @whumpbees @whumplr-reader @cyberwhumper

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[dr3am5scape]

Braiding Jinx hair 💙

Requested from @kitkaaz

Summary: You were babysitting Jinx (since Silco; her father had meetings to go, so instead you stay the night doing her hair until he comes back).

Warnings: (None) *Only care and treatment*

Anyone’s allow to read this (This is all for enjoyment) Pls enjoy!!

-Also, relaxing music is so helpful while reading this

-(Can search up Cleancore music on yt.)

Jinx in her meantime was working on gadgets; any other tools she uses in her privacy hideout. She’s listening to her loud music ,while being her own self, not noticing a person was behind her trying to get her attention. “Um Jinx…” you tried waving her but she was focusing on her thing. You tried tapping on her shoulder but that didn’t help either. So when her record player turned off itself, Jinx spins around and jumps to see you stand there. “Whew! Jeez, you couldn’t wait until I was done, y/n.” You giggle at her words. “My bad about that. Silco told me to come by and spend time with you while he’s away. He just have business to take care of.” You wasn’t trying to have her mood change after saying that. You could tell Jinx frown but you did your best to cheer her up. “What if I could braid your hair as a special treat?” You smile at her. Jinx glance back at you looking through you with her goggles. “I guess so…sure why not.” You order her to sit down on the floor and so she did. Jinx sat down as if she was as like a small child looking innocent. She giggle slightly which made you did along. Then Jinx took off her goggles and waited for you to unbraid two of her ponytails.

You did so by gently taking off the yellow rubber bands she had on her hair. And carefully start unwrapping each braid Jinx had all the way down to the top of her head. You hum while doing the work process. It felt like music in your ears, taking your sweet time admiring how beautiful is her blue hair. It was somehow quiet, although you hear Jinx singing a random song in her happy mood, you went on unbraiding still, making her hair fall slowly downwards behind her back after you finally was able to get the braids all off. Jinx hair was vivid and so blue as the sea ocean or the clear blue sky. It’s like if she was a mermaid with her hair floating around her. Jinx was enjoying the feeling with you, doing her hair. It felt unfamiliar to her as a sort of motherly kind feeling (which she never had that moment before).

While figuring out what to do with her hair again, you decided to drag her towards a sink you could find and brought out Jinx favorite soap. “Noooo” Jinx groans not wanting to get her hair wash. You had to anyway cuz surely Jinx had been scratching her hair most often. Even Silco told you about that. You continue to pamper her on what was Jinx given. Turning on the sink, you put Jinx hair down and start washing her hair in bubbly soap. The water was comforting to jinx with soothing soft texture in her scalp. Jinx felt relaxed and carefree, able to let go of things she was thinking of the back of her head. The things that gave her flashbacks, the memories she still remember. But the feeling of her hair getting cleaned, makes it way easier.

After that nice moment, you dry up her hair with a towel, blow drying it and then begin combing a brush Jinx had in her dresser (since you forgot to bring a lot of the stuff for her hair). Which gentle strokes on combing her blue hair was given a refreshed start. Jinx never had her hair done all the time, so you let her know that you would come to teach her after two months. You continue on combing it out, massaging her hair and releasing any knots Jinx had hidden inside her hair. Jinx never like to untangle some because how hurt it can be. Jinx did her best to sit still and not move a lot because she hates having her hair untangled. You comfort her to keep sitting still and you’ll be done in no time. Through the process, of Jinx hair getting washed, brushed and combed out, finally you start of styling up a cute hairstyle. You let Jinx pick out a hairstyle which was (towards the end)

You gave the hair Jinx chooses of a nice touch to her overall look. Decided it was best to make it look like the image, you start back sectioning out on two part of her hair and then twisted each of her hair to a braid, adding cute beads and then putting colorful hairpins on her bangs. A while of doing that, Jinx look at herself in the reflection with her eyes wide. She was adorable like a doll wearing cute ribbons. Her expression softens a bit, finding out how lovely she turned out. Jinx gave you a squeeze jumping up and down on how excited she was. You totally forgot how energetic she was. She thank you and got back on spinning her favorite chair again and continue on more of her gadgets while you just stand there, watching her from behind and smiling warmly at her.

(And this her hairstyle)

I’m glad I ended up doing something through my lazy and long ass morning and noon before heading out to work at the gym, gaining on muscles myself. Have a wonderful rest of your day and new year. I’ll come back to do more fanfics on her more and others . lmk other request. Much love🦋