#But it doesnt work. Its not development its regression

[steeb-stn]

we dont talk enough about how the mcu got steves ending so so so wrong. and then to rub salt into the wound no one understood WHY it was wrong

[liquidstar]

i think subaru is interesting as a protagonist because of the way he gets fleshed out over the story. i mean, its fairly common to reveal character backstories to have their actions leading up to this point make more sense, but for an isekai protagonist in particular i just think the way its done is so interesting.

you start the story with pretty much 0 context about who this kid is. and this is typical genre convention, you assume that you dont need context because its an isekai. the story doesnt really have to establish anything beyond that hes just some nerdy kid. thats how it usually goes right? hes not MEANT to have a backstory, hes meant for the viewer to project upon. and that works for a while but

by arc 2 his very specific character quirks start to pop up, and you also start to see that hes trying VERY HARD to play a role in his head. a very specific role that hes chosen out. and this eventually comes to a head in arc 3, especially after the julius fight and falling-out with emilia. and thats when you see him at his lowest with actual deeply rooted FLAWS. ones he was desperately trying to run from to play the isekai hero role. and then you get the "from zero" speech which is such a turning point for his entire character.

but you still haven't even begun to scratch the surface of what makes him tick. the story doesn't give you his actual backstory until arc 4, with the trial's glimpse into his family and school life. and everything about him makes sense. not that it didnt make sense before but holy crap... hes a character. hes not a just self insert. hes got a lot of really specific fucked up shit going on in his head. he has a family, he had friends, he went to school, he was a teenager... he was a guy! a person! and now you really get who that person is and why hes Like This

and it seems like thats it. from here on out its just about development, arc 5 doesnt really dive deep into any more of his backstory, and arc 6 is all about REGRESSION for him. his memories literally go back to the exact point they were when the story started. though this time we have a lot more context.

that's all you need to know right? i mean by this point the story is seven arcs in, what other possible revelations could there be about the protagonist that would put his entire story arc until this point into a whole new context-

NATSUMI SCHWARTZ

[foulfeast]

Deeply embarrassed to ask this, but I looked away about a month back and clearly missed something important; who is Pluto?

OH GOSH DONT WORRY! :] i havent added any info on them yet in my pinned either, i really need to. I actually just explained this to a friend on discord so ill just copy it w some small corrections. Heres the babygirl themself:

Tjey are a sorcerer in a world where like... magic is more treated as a science, just one that has for years been near impossible to control, replicate etc- incredibly unpredictable and ENDLESSLY complex. IT IS a collection of different energies that we dont have in our world, comparable to things like gravity, electricity, magnetism... idk what yet but i am working on it 🫡 ive been putting a bunch of finnshit in there so i think smth will at least be based on singing spells, so maybe some kind of a force similiar to vibrational energy? Vibration is smth that exists but a form of it that can change the physical aspects of smth or call to the physical elements/nature of smth- singing the ground into a swamp etc

And there is like a lot of lore starting to form about differemt eras of how people approached it - in short Pluto "grew up" on a version where people made an attempt to control it. They slid into a more modern thinking of "moving with it, communicating with it"- however, that is a bit surface level, and they still in actions do seek to control it.

They live in an old church like building- basically an old hospital, now a "town witches" home. Old people still come by to get help with things - so do some younger people who have exhausted other routes

(To be clear- it doesnt always work. Because of the whole unpredictability thing.)

However like... the last 30 yesrs people have moved more towards "modern scientific diciplines" like electricity, whixh is far easier to control

Magic is more powerful but only when successful

Modern sciences and old ones are NOT COMPLETELY SEPERATE! Magic could be ccompared to just electricity, igs just an exra energy in this world (there are different forms of it)

Like medicine & chemistry is closer to old sciences than the use of electricity

Pluto is a smooth charming motherfucker. Huge control freak and saviour complex, but they hide it well. Genuinely well meaning!!! A good person but deeply needy and it makes them capable of causing damage.

This is a lot of... me looking at nostalgia and how things were never fairytales, but there was still a sense of fancy to things when i was a kid - and in recent years it has made somewhat of a return, but i sometimes worry that that kind of nostalgia and openness can also be a way to regress. And then looping back to - how its also important to understand and parse past in a way that helps us learn from it, and take the good parts while mutilating the bad parts into a better shape, no matter how it hurts.

It is about time but "My Moon", a character whose design i need to fuck around with also brings an element of toxic codependency, where Pluto gets to act their chivalrous games and know things and guide someone and My Moon gets to stop growing and developing on their own as they get to always be saved.

So i guess thats still about time... two people who the time will pass by

Not as like, h8ing on tradition, on god, im someone who loves history and seeking answers in it. But like as an exploration of some of my experiences w wanting to regress to this state of helplessness and certainty of what has already passed. Maybe makes no sense :] ill work on explaining it better.

Allthough I wil say,if i ever do some full project w pluto, it will be more wholesome, at least on surface! There is a lot of love in their life.

[rust-is-a-car-disease]

Thinking abt cheongryeo

dod spoilers!

Keep in mind i dont know a lot abt the related industries this is all opinions

Cheongryeo himself is such an interesting character. I find that he is so incredibly well written and thats amazing.

Usuallg people depict a lot of psychos as the innocent ^^ expression guys. And thats fun and all and i very much still enjoy him being depicted that way but i love that he definetely gives of more :) energy to me.

Like hes not mean? Hes actually pretty nice to people around him as far as it seems with how positive his image is that people are comfortable featuring him with puppies. You dont do that with people known to be cruel as far as i know and hes actually overall quite a decent and nice guy. And he has had a long enough career that even after the regression time period he could get ruined.

And his relationship with his members arent hostile either! Theyre have a bit of distance between them but its not because hes particularly mean. His dynamic with them is just more so of a leader and normal members in the sense of the person in charge + everyone else but not to the extent of a boss or superior.

But the thing is that they are also quite intimidated by him. I think part of it at least is unconciously or conciously his single minded drive to be the best idol for the longest time possible. Its not bad... its just unsettling and we as the reader know for a fact why but they dont at first so its like they just see a guy with such a single minded driven focus that has probably made a lot of unreasonable decisions that help them unexpectedly and he doesnt seem to care for much else.

He had no life outside of idol work and not in the same way as moondae who seems to merge idol work with his life. Moondae tends to more have his idol life bleed into his non idol life and that develops into less idol life and more his general life and thats a great comparison i think to cheongryeo who literally only has idol life. It seems explainable to us because we know the context but to them they see a guy not just buried in work but have a complete lack of life outside of it. (And i know context makes a difference because of the impact it has in mostly later chapters but ill get to that later)

And he doesnt even know what to do outside of idol work when he starts to learn to be a person again! I think thats very telling of how he acts. Because he has based every bit of himself on idol work he has nothing left and has no idea where to start. And its probably a bit unsettling to have someone so focused on their career that they have just nothing else. Not in a oh no this was like his like shtick thing way but just completely non existent.

I think that single minded focus is at least unconciously intimidating or unsettling even if they dont notice. Because people are like plants with several branches, grows in unrefined and crossing over each other and changeable with sticks but cheongryeo only has this one branch, his idol life, and its his everything. He doesnt even seem that connected to the metaphorical trunk which would be his pre regression time! He has this one branch with these few sticks because he keeps cutting off everything he deems 'trash' (as like his characteristic). He only stops after his forgotten 101th probably because of his subconscious making him redo a large part if not his whole perspective. And even then its still just a single branch, still just his idol life. He only really gets other branches in his life after all his regressions when he gets kongi. (I could elaborate more but again later)

This leads me into his obsession. Because idol work was literally his entire life and has been his actual lifeline for so long he knows nothing else. So when he finds out the next person (moondae) he obsesses over it. Because in a way he is still obsessing over a perfect idol career even if hes not working on the assumption that he would return too.

As long as someone can go back even if its not him he would always have a chance to perfect his idol career.

Eugh i have so many thoughts that intersect with each other but im hungry so im going to continue another time

[weebsinstash]

*sighs as I add the yandere Batfam to my Blorbo list* do y'all ever have such a genuinely unsatisfying life and childhood you start for whatever reason vicariously living through age regression ideas where you're literally raised by other people

Like imagine you're a superhero/vigilante but you're fairly small time and you've actually bumped into Batman a handful of times and, he actually likes you, your heart is in the right place, and through some wacky villain shenanigans or some Lazarus Pit fuckery, you get zapped by a ray gun or hit wirh a spell or "resurrected wrong" and suddenly Bruce has to deal with a de-aged you, a teenager without their adult memories and aged back to before you developed your skills or your metagene that gave you your powers

And here's Batman already shoving adopted children into his pockets like breadsticks at olive garden "oh no, ANOTHER orphan/kid with a horrible childhood in need of a home? Whatever shall we do. Oh no my hand slipped and I already texted Alfred to prepare a room to stay and oh no my Waynazon shopping list is suddenly full of new furniture and gifts and clothes and i already emailed Dick and Barabaras university so you can get a better education and oh wow just what is going on this is so weird"

Alfred standing by with his dry wit whenever Reader gets hormonal or does typical teenager things "ah yes, yelling 'I hate you' and slamming doors, I definitely didn't have enough of this experience raising you, Master Wayne" but like he adores it really, we all know this man is a caretaker at heart and as someone who 'knew you before' st least through what Bruce has told him, he's happy to help give you a better life

Of course then complications arise whenever Reader gets her memory back (and potentially extremely pissed she was kept as a child and literally no attempts, none, zero, nada, zilch attempts were made to turn her back to normal) and she's like "ok well I'm mentally an adult again but I'm still in a kids body, let's try and turn me back and then I can be a real adult again" and the entire batfamily is just "OR, hear me out, OR. You could stay here though? And if you wanna be a crimefighter you should at least stay with us but like its jusr ao dangerous though what if you got hurt 🥺" IF they let you return to hero work at all but let's be real, if you did, I think Bruce would be so proud to put a little bat symbol or R or whatever on your uniform cause it's like, awwww bonding, everyone's gonna know you're his lil protege 🥰

And imagine Reader goes to confront Bruce about this whole thing and you just start bawling because "was I just such a pathetic loser before that you wanted to change everything about me" and like he did the whole thing with good intentions but, YEAH he did absolutely lie to you and kind of shape you a little for the few years you were "raised" by him and you're standing there with your new clothes and your new haircut and all the hobbies he's paid for and the education he's paid for and all the new things you've learned and can do because he had the resources to give them to you and you're wondering what was so unlikable about you before that he doesnt want you to be that person again, to be the person you've always known and lived your life as

Suffice to say he isn't going to turn you back at all and if you have to "return to your old self" by literally naturally aging back to your "original age" then so be it. You've got an entire mansion filled with your loving 'family' and you're happy and you're healthy and really, maybe you're just being anxious and scared and all it will take is time for you to adjust and see that all of them know what's best. Amd if you never do adjust and you're just kept around anyways, well, it doesn't make much of a difference to them. Hell, maybe they'll find a hero or villain or magic user who can, you know, maybe make you forget all about the life you had before, completely wipe your head until only the Wayne family, your family, is left

Really, Bruce would consider it just to hear you call him 'Dad' again

[falllpoutboy]

i don’t know if there’s correlation here, but i fear there might be. but i hate when people act like “shipping” shouldn’t happen with a show like the bear because apparently the show is “above” that, but the incels on reddit/twitter get to project onto characters like richie or carmy and share a vast amount of racist/misogynistic takes towards sydney. i don’t know it seems like people are more concerned with shipping more than those things. chris has said time and time again that this story is about the people first and romantic relationships is a natural part of human existence, not to sound corny lol, but it’s true. syd and carmy are close in age and connect on a different level in comparison to everyone else like….what can be expected? the show has given us multiple scenes to lead us to believe something could happen between them as well, so it’s always very weird when those supposed film bros don’t see that? i would think they would catch onto the editing and lighting of some scenes…. also it’s not surprising that a lot of men that watch the show reject any scenes of positive feeling or hope, they just want carmy to be traumatized for the whole show with no character development and growth, just work and trauma and nothing romantic unless it’s with claire. she’s apparently supposed to serve as his sweet love interest who is so far removed from that world, enough to service as a distraction. ugh, it’s just frustrating. there’s so much hypocrisy. like it’s especially frustrating how they take the shipping as pure projection and ruining the show, but they’re allowed to act like carmy and richie are direct representation of themselves….hm.

i don’t know how one can watch their very first meeting, the “this is what love is for” needle drop of them cooking together, the “you’re dressed like syd”, the reunion, the fact that carmy cooked the best meal sydney ever made, the fact that sydney was jealous of claire (which surprise surprise! also doesnt dimish her character in way- it only makes her more human and multifaceted!), the table scene + subsequent thom browne chef whites gift, and the fact they opened up to each other multiple times about personal stuff and never once think there might be something there. you can take issue with the act of shipping sure (which, lol, this is the internet and people have been shipping characters since the 60s) but to try and dimiss the very real point and possibility of sydney and carmy after 2 seasons, 18 episodes and nearly 10 hours of content screaming at the viewers to get it then idk to tell them. reddit is usually misogynistic/racist so i wouldnt put too much stock into what they say on there

the problem with claire isn’t that she exists, its more so the fact that the purpose of her character hasn’t been made more explicitly clear to EVERYONE yet. people who analyze the show by rewatching it and clocking all the times that claire and carmy’s relationship is antithetical to the show’s themes of growth and development and positivity and progress even when everyone is screaming at you to regress and supress. i said it before in a previous ask but i hope they make that explicitly clear and obvious in s3

[roomwithavoid]

Hey so just so you know, you can't just have "proship DNI" when you literally defended one. Especially when that proshipper is an adult that's saying "littles can consent" (Which is the exact same as saying "kids can consent", mind you)"...What adults are allowed to do with adults" A system being bodily an adult doesn't mean the little can consent. It's kinda like trying to do sexual things to someone who is age regressing (Not saying Littles in systems are the same as one who age regresses, just using an example)My friend calling this proshipper and his goons "epstein avengers" wasn't wrong, because that's what they are. If you're a legal adult and a proshipper, especially one who thinks Kids/Littles can consent, then atp you're a fucking pedophile. No sugar coating it, just saying how it is.

okay firstly fuckin weird play moving all the way to tumblr to talk about twitter beef? secondly the reason i have proship dni in my bio is cause i dont want proship ACCOUNTS following me. its fucking weird of you to be telling me what i can and cannot do with my own account. this is my house, my rules. I'm even allowed to make exceptions to my own rules, funny how that works. But saint's acc is not a proship acc. saint does not post proship content. i dont have an issue with them. saint just doesnt care what people do in their own homes. maybe you should try that. third, saying "sometimes littles can consent" is NOT the same thing as saying "children can consent," and to say that is deliberately dishonest. istg some of you need to get more comfortable with nuance and the idea of "this thing is sometimes one way and sometimes another." every system is different, just as every little is different. a little in an adult body is still someone with a fully developed brain. are there a lot of littles that regress far enough that they probably arent able to consent? of course. both saint and i acknowledged this, but there are also alters who are littles by technicality but are functionally a lot different from a child in a child's body. fourth, a pedophile is someone who is attracted to children, and you trying to change that definition to anyone who has a take you dont like about their own goddamn bodily autonomy is protecting pedophiles. i said that to your dumbass friend because. as a 15 y/o, they have absolutely no business deciding what adults to with their adult bodies. they have no idea what its like to be a little in an adult body either. stay in your lane and get the fuck out my inbox.

[wawawawawawawawawawawawawa]

[context: i went on a rant on this post about gray morality while high but reblogs are turned off BUT i want my rant to be rebloggable so uh. here it is verbatim copypasted]

i feel like this about izaya but i cant put it into words, i guess like because. i see him as a guy with aspd who doesnt know how to manage a disorder he doesnt know he has, or he’s learned somewhat but the alternative was less miserable?

because, see the thing about aspd is. when you’re first learning how to manage it, it’s miserable! aspd is kind of like, an addiction to dopamine. in aspd your brain produces like. 4x the amount it should. and a lot of times, aspd and adhd are both there, and with adhd the dopamine is very very low. see? these two work in tandem! you don’t WANT to recover, because being ill feels better. you’re happier, you’re entertained, you get rushes of dopamine all the time… but you’re horrible, probably. like izaya says, in order to be entertained you have to keep evolving. you have to do worse and worse things to satisfy yourself. that’s when it changes from acceptable to A Problem. because one day you’re a writer satisfied by making their friends squirm and cry from angst, and the next you’re actively triggering people for a reaction. and its hard to stop because the dopamine, there’s just so much of it.

what i’m saying is, it’s a mental disorder that feels very good to have. like the mania of bipolar- like when you’re manic, you suddenly feel invincible and so so so so good, until you crash? like that feeling. it doesn’t WANT you to recover, and you also don’t want to recover, it feels so good to have. but it also doesnt because youre lonely on account of the aforementioned Sucking. studies show that theres a correlation between “people with aspd who recovered” and “people with aspd who are married,” but did the marriage fix them or is them attracting a partner indicative of their aspd being “less severe?” and therefore more likely to recover? ah if only we had a person with aspd here we could ask them-

PSYCHE MOTHAFUCKAAAA THATS ME!!!! it’s probably the first one. lol. i started improving symptomatically once someone came into my life and actually STAYED there. he didn’t “fix me” but he did help! and i wouldnt say i’m “recovered” wrt the aspd- it still is a disorder that feels very good to have.

but what i’m saying is- izaya. if he has all this. this, “inescapable negative outcome” is. yeah. he either “recovers” and regresses back into a depressed ball of boredom, surpressing every single impulse or emotion because “what if it’s the one that makes me lose control?” and being terrified of becoming a monster like everyone says People Like Him should be…. OR he leans more into the behaviors and urges he knows suck, spiraling into a domapine-addiction that slowly makes him into a worse and worse person and remaining lonely? like. he’s already lonely!!! neither outcome actually promises real happiness, so at some point you;d be tempted to lose control, just to get SOMETHING. and i think that’s what happened to izaya. and this isnt to be like “oooooo baby nothing is his fault,” we can talk about how all this IS his fault like, mental illness and addiction do not excempt someone from consequece and douchebaggery. but it IS something to think about- like, those suicidal girls fell down a spiral of mental illness, and so did izaya. like, he sucks, but also, you can kinda see how him being neglected all his life means there was no other way this couldve gone, especially with knowing shinra. like, he sucks now, but he never really had an oppurtunity to be anything other that that. there was nothing else that would’ve happened, because of every other inevitable thing.

and how do i know that someone w aspd would eventually choose the willing mental spiral? i am ACTIVELY developing a drug problem right now, i know my chance of becoming addicted is VERY high and possibly am showing early signs like cravings and stuff. i know. but i’m still taking the drug because it’s doing exactly what drugs do to people- make them trmporarily happy and get rid of the boredom and sadness of repression. i know what’s going to happen to me but i was eventually tempted into it. you would be too if you had my life.

(disclaimer i am not 100% sure if the neuroscience is accurate here, brain scans wrt psychology are not an exact science and the study could have been wrong or biased, i don't remember and i'm sure i didn't remember when i was zonked off my ass- but there is a sort of link between aspd and adhd so it makes sense that they'd both mess with dopamine production. but yk, take it with a grain of salt)

[stellatenuem]

mmm love writing ren post-royal and his character regression and people hitting me with the 'thats ooc for joker though' and im like listen. listen? reverse character development is fun and sexy actually. let them become Worse

and within my ren's canon, a character regression works because ren was raised in an enmeshed family. and toxic familial abuse cycles are magnified by proximity. especially wherein the abuser is unable to see the victim as anything other than an extension of themselves.

an enmeshed victim doesnt act like themselves when under the abusers influence. ren the person takes a backseat to a series of behaviors (healthy or otherwise) he developed while trying to cope with and survive the trauma he went through while living with his parents for 16 whole years. that doesn't just... become resolved even though he was able to grow in tokyo.

if anything, something like that can make it even harder to be put back in that kind of environment. i speak from experience. its such a devastating thing. you live in the dysfunction for so long you dont realize its impact until youve been away from it. you were okay. you felt better and you didnt even realize it until things go back to the way they were before. that moment of mindfulness, of being horribly aware of the before and the after can be so depressing.

environment is everything.

during his year on probation ren started developing emotional equity and forming the closest thing they've had to secure attachments up to that point. ren arrived in tokyo traumatized. he was planning on keeping his head down and staying quiet. he didnt want to make any friends. he didn’t think he could. what would be the point in trying? others would make up their minds about him as soon as they’d find out he was a criminal. they would abandon him, too.

ren didn't trust anyone around him. they decided they would create a personality as cold and distant as they needed to in order to protect themselves. then the universe dropped one Ryuji Sakamoto in front of him and those plans began to fall apart. ryuji, ann, and morgana literally opened ren up to wanting to TRUST people again. that maybe he isn't as damned as he was made to believe.

he grew as a person and found where he belonged. but he isn't free yet. ren's parents do everything they can to erase that person. they still command enough control over ren through their traumabond that re-inspires rens learned fear of them. so ren's trauma brain allows them to slowly pick away at the confidence and sense of self he'd come to find. even if its a betrayal of himself. even if at times he's able to summon the courage of joker put up a fight, its rare for him to see any wins.

ren's parents rule by emotional abuse. fear. and isolation. they go from shaming him heavily for a year with the silent treatment, to scrutinizing and watching his every move. trying to have control over every aspect of him again. where he goes. who he talks to. what he spends money on. how he spends his time. ren begins regressing more and more. and its not only their toxicity that lend to this. even if his parents were healthy and loving, ren still would have struggled deeply because of everything he'd been through over the year he was away.

aside from the horrific trauma he endured at the hands of the police, being toyed with by a malevolent god who erased his friends from existence in front of his eyes, and being betrayed by an adult he trusted in maruki, ren lost goro twice, and in the wake of that loss, was separated from his irl support system.

death and the grief that comes from it transform the life of the person experiencing it. it changes how you interact with your routines, hobbies, relationships, and even yourself. the person that emerges from a grief situation is not the same one who experienced the tragedy it in real time. and rens grief at times is powerful enough to swallow him whole. to impact his functioning as he tries to go about his life.

and every time he falls below his parents standards, tries to establish autonomy, they just punish him more. isolate him more by taking away his phone, his laptop, his only lifelines to his friends. he's going to get worse. hes not going to act like his authentic self. hes going to fall into his worst mindsets and make unhealthy decisions. even someone like ren, who knows full well his parents treat him like shit, at his core, still wishes for their love and approval. its one of the hardest things to reconcile with, even as a adult, that your parents will never be the people you need them to be.

in a way, he's got to grieve over that, too, now that he knows now what unconditional love looks like. (because of his found family and friends) like, this kid was ghosted by their parents for a whole year. after his life as he knew it was completely shattered and he was shipped off to the city to live with a total stranger. ren had been effectively abandoned by them to fend for himself. i cannot begin to comprehend how fucking emotionally damaging that is.

imagine that happening to you and then at the end of your year away, after you've been through so much more hell (most of which you cant tell any normal person about) youre just supposed to??? go back to living in their house with them??? after they did that to you? like. thats fucking sick. and then go back to gaslighting you and acting like they didn't hurt you. and theyre the victims, actually.

[wawawawawawawawawawawawawa]

i feel like this about izaya but i cant put it into words, i guess like because. i see him as a guy with aspd who doesnt know how to manage a disorder he doesnt know he has, or he's learned somewhat but the alternative was less miserable?

because, see the thing about aspd is. when you're first learning how to manage it, it's miserable! aspd is kind of like, an addiction to dopamine. in aspd your brain produces like. 4x the amount it should. and a lot of times, aspd and adhd are both there, and with adhd the dopamine is very very low. see? these two work in tandem! you don't WANT to recover, because being ill feels better. you're happier, you're entertained, you get rushes of dopamine all the time... but you're horrible, probably. like izaya says, in order to be entertained you have to keep evolving. you have to do worse and worse things to satisfy yourself. that's when it changes from acceptable to A Problem. because one day you're a writer satisfied by making their friends squirm and cry from angst, and the next you're actively triggering people for a reaction. and its hard to stop because the dopamine, there's just so much of it.

what i'm saying is, it's a mental disorder that feels very good to have. like the mania of bipolar- like when you're manic, you suddenly feel invincible and so so so so good, until you crash? like that feeling. it doesn't WANT you to recover, and you also don't want to recover, it feels so good to have. but it also doesnt because youre lonely on account of the aforementioned Sucking. studies show that theres a correlation between "people with aspd who recovered" and "people with aspd who are married," but did the marriage fix them or is them attracting a partner indicative of their aspd being "less severe?" and therefore more likely to recover? ah if only we had a person with aspd here we could ask them-

PSYCHE MOTHAFUCKAAAA THATS ME!!!! it's probably the first one. lol. i started improving symptomatically once someone came into my life and actually STAYED there. he didn't "fix me" but he did help! and i wouldnt say i'm "recovered" wrt the aspd- it still is a disorder that feels very good to have.

but what i'm saying is- izaya. if he has all this. this, "inescapable negative outcome" is. yeah. he either "recovers" and regresses back into a depressed ball of boredom, surpressing every single impulse or emotion because "what if it's the one that makes me lose control?" and being terrified of becoming a monster like everyone says People Like Him should be.... OR he leans more into the behaviors and urges he knows suck, spiraling into a domapine-addiction that slowly makes him into a worse and worse person and remaining lonely? like. he's already lonely!!! neither outcome actually promises real happiness, so at some point you;d be tempted to lose control, just to get SOMETHING. and i think that's what happened to izaya. and this isnt to be like "oooooo baby nothing is his fault," we can talk about how all this IS his fault like, mental illness and addiction do not excempt someone from consequece and douchebaggery. but it IS something to think about- like, those suicidal girls fell down a spiral of mental illness, and so did izaya. like, he sucks, but also, you can kinda see how him being neglected all his life means there was no other way this couldve gone, especially with knowing shinra. like, he sucks now, but he never really had an oppurtunity to be anything other that that. there was nothing else that would've happened, because of every other inevitable thing.

and how do i know that someone w aspd would eventually choose the willing mental spiral? i am ACTIVELY developing a drug problem right now, i know my chance of becoming addicted is VERY high and possibly am showing early signs like cravings and stuff. i know. but i'm still taking the drug because it's doing exactly what drugs do to people- make them trmporarily happy and get rid of the boredom and sadness of repression. i know what's going to happen to me but i was eventually tempted into it. you would be too if you had my life.

People think "gray morality" in fiction is about Both Sides Are Partly Right Actually but so much more often it's about choices having inescapable negative outcomes that have to be weighed against the benefits, or it's about having to choose between a series of bad options, or it's about making hard decisions about what you are willing to sacrifice to achieve the outcome you believe is good.

So often, I seem to see people angry that a story in a video game didn't present a Good Option with no collateral damage and no negative outcomes whatsoever, and if there are any downsides it's seen as the writers punishing you for the decision, because they see the primary purpose of stories to be moralizing rather than exploring the complexities of human experience. Or they argue that the collateral damage didn't really happen, or that the negative outcomes weren't really that bad actually, and thus miss the point altogether.

And I feel like it's important to remember that a narrative telling you a decision is difficult is not the same thing as the narrative telling you it is wrong.

[pinkseas]

[parasocial bestie] GOOD MORNING ALY I SHOT UP TO WRITE THIS THE MOMENT I SAW UR ANSWER AND I JUST. I WAS. YEAH I WAS LIKE YEAHHHHHHH YYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAH so anyway firstly HELP I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING AT "my cat is here as i write this she can explode too" PATCHES NO maybe yes like perhaps dont explode yet i would also like to know ur thoughts on xiao genshin impact before you do and i will allow it just get ur guts on the floor after ur honest answer patches

"NO BC i dont think ive seen full on infantilization of xiao (Yet.) but the thought of it just now esp w/ zhongli flooded dread through every ounce of my being dear Lord" i mean uhhhhh i Mean not gonna badmouth too much but there is Plenty of those fics and i definitely have my eyes unfortunately lay on age-regressing xiao but like. mentally. he acts like baby. i mean cool ok cool sure sure sure sure sure do what you enjoy of that typa familial interaction i respect u as i push it gently aside.

"zhongli Gets It zhongli knows whats up <333" yknow like THIS GETS ME SM its so important not just abt keeping them both in-character (at least in my perception of what canon is) its also. abt keeping their thoughts in line with it as realistically as possible. i think. i could go so far with how zhongli wud treat xiao with care and warmth and CAN address that sometimes,.. xiao can still be weak can still be the exact opposite of the hardened side he had been and while it does bring to the eventual guilt he feels like a child,.. like my good sir you didnt get to be a child before either. i think a little pampering is something u deserve (AND WHAT DOES PAMPER MEAN THAT DOESNT FEEL LIKE ZL IS BABYING HIM HONESTLYYYY cus in my view its just the former archon being indulgent but also treating xiao. as humanly as possible. as accordingly as what he needs. and xiao needs a Lot)

"said as if i dont put him in so many situations with So Much affection because i cant get the idea of him w/ the traveler specifically being very casually physically affectionate out of my head after seeing the way he holds onto them during that One cutscene" WELL I MEAN,... well i just eehhehehbvkfh though it does catch a lot of hearts especially in the beginning of liyue and iirc thats the second time xiao and lumine ever met in person at all. personally i dont see it that way then having that physical affection develop and have been staying like that in writing their development since (cus man am i so attached to the idea of an emotionally constipated/detached xiao so much that he doesnt just need guidance to overcome his conflicting worldview, but also to understand human emotion and how those two goes hand in hand).

"him being casually affectionate gets me so bad but him being touch repulsed or touch starved or both or him only really accepting physical contact of anytime in combat because thats just how it works or him feeling as though he doesnt deserve the affection" THAT OSIAL FIGHT SEQUENCE IN THE TOWER ASUNDER FIC WHERE XIAO AND LUMINE FIGHTS SO SEAMLESSLY that lumine chose him specifically not just bc of his battle prowess on short-range but his ability to stay mid-air and helping her stay mid-air. throwing her in all angles so every side of osial isnt left out as they both fought. their skills and techniques despite the years and worlds of difference melding in instantaneously after mere seconds of being introduced to each other feels like a form of affection itself in battle its so PERFECT I DIE OVERTHINKING ABT IT explodes explodes.

"i actually have partially written with him enjoying/accepting it from lumine but having no idea how to reciprocate in the slightest" yknow the bits of ideas i told u especially abt the xiao deadge brainrot and wings ask where they have a certain intimacy going on. well both of them are close to the end of lumine's journey hence an important kinda-resolution of how they think abt their relationship (brainrot) and after the journey ends (wings ask, post-teyvat). my interpretation of xiao reciprocating these affections that doesnt just center from lumine,..... its built up on that confusion and xiao hesitates a lot, but can become fully accepting once he understands it. like the times lumine would feel so torn about her brother directly (quests with dainsleif), or any circumstance that relates to him (aranara world quests with nara varuna) that she needs somekind of grounding and he KNOWS lumine herself does it in his own depressing moments so its like a 2+2 thing. what she does for him, he does it back, simple as that. it used to be a logical, but a little careless thought process without the genuine care, but soon enough the concern he had for her would match the gestures he does in turn.

i overanalyze dat shit and how xiao would act the way he does bc i do Not. like naur way NO WAY i dont rlly believe strongly he instantly cares and goes almost perfectly affectionate on the reason its for lumine and her only. thats a big problem with me and seeing xiao regarding attachments and im pree sure ive ranted that sht often enough here HAHAAKFJHSD ANYWAY I JUST!!!!!!!!!!!!! man xiaolumi can get so specific to me sometimes and i love to explore this certain aspect of their relationship where they do grow to be close, but theres this?? invisible distance, somekind of barrier i cant explain between them especially when they conflict each other with their worldviews and understanding. and post-teyvat is where that barrier didnt really destroy between them, but enough that they can reach for each other. like yknow!!!!!! yknow,............. shniff

[also this is the most oot thing ever did u know i actually did drafted my asks before sending it to u on this doc so i can rmb what the fuck i was talking abt and how it relates to ur response and it happened like. prolly my second ask in the Very Beginning so anyway. the doc reached 59 pages 32k words probably more than i could ever write for my uni thesis light and love <333]

HIIIIIIIIIIIII HI HI HI BESTIE I HOPE UVE HAD A GOOD DAY AND THAT UR NIGHT IS AMAZING <33333333

no bc. bestie shannon and i (first of all shannon if ur seeing this thats ur official title now second of all context shan is the one who reads at least half of these asks/conversations which is still WILD to me) have been watching rwby together lately and patches is there Most Of The Time and every time she shows up i point her out and we'll ask her rwby questions...... and idk ur rwby knowledge if any but blake is a character who has a largely black and white color scheme and gold eyes and cat ears and patches has gold eyes and she's black and white so every time Blake Specifically shows up we'll go "patches what are your thoughts on rwby character blake belladonna" and it makes me giggle sm and from now on whenever she shows up when im writing or playing genshin i know Damn Well im gonna start saying "patches what are your thoughts on xiao genshin impact" and she will Stare At Me with her big patches eyes and say nothing. and i will nod understandingly and say Wise Words Patches. sorry its not even 10am i got so much sleep and yet i am Deliriously exhausted anyways

AGE REGRESSION IS SO. i have sm respect for it esp as like a genuine coping mechanism and i cant really speak on fics for it but the thought of xiao specifically as a character regressing is so ??? i get it in Theory but in Practice. you can not tell me that that man would a) do that voluntarily under any circumstance or b) trust ANYONE enough to tell them if he did it involuntarily. sometimes u just gotta write fics where you baby the fave and i look away from those in general out of personal preference but i am especially looking away from ones where its xiao i can Not see it i can not imagine it in any world <- lying a little bit because now that im thinking about it i can under very specific circumstances but NONE within which and none of which would lead to him being like actually genuinely infantilized in any way shape or form. it simply would not happen i cannot see any fics babying xiao as being in character for anyone involved in the slightest

"xiao can still be weak can still be the exact opposite of the hardened side he had been and while it does bring to the eventual guilt he feels like a child,.. like my good sir you didnt get to be a child before either" LITERALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY king. king put down your weapon shed your armor let yourself Rest you were never allowed to do so before just allow it of yourself now trust the people around you to look after themselves and liyue and allow yourself to take care of yourself to maybe even be taken care of just a little bit. just a little. please. Please.

"cus in my view its just the former archon being indulgent but also treating xiao. as humanly as possible. as accordingly as what he needs. and xiao needs a Lot" naur dw i get it like there's a difference between like. okay how the Fuck do i word this. there's a difference between treating someone gently knowing their strength and capability and choosing to be soft regardless in a good, respectful way, VS flat out ignoring that persons capability and strength and treating them like glass and truly believing that they could shatter at any moment if thought of any differently. zhongli knows exactly who xiao is and what he's capable of, hes not about to forget any of that or cast it aside in order to act like xiao is this tiny, fragile thing. hes going to be well aware of it and still make the choice to be kind and gentle and accommodating, to try and give xiao some of the care and concern he's so rarely seen or known in his life. xiao can be cared for and maybe even pampered a little without it being weird or ooc or disrespectful or anything of the sort

"he doesnt just need guidance to overcome his conflicting worldview, but also to understand human emotion and how those two goes hand in hand" o(-( DIES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! no bc i genuinely love this so fucking bad especially just. the emphasis on his conflicting worldview and thinking about it and sajbdnamfnafgdsag. I JUYST WROTE LIKE A WHOLE PARAGRAPH but it was super fucking rambly in a way that made NO sense whatsoever so it is gone now goodbye </3 but god. yeah. Yeah.

"that lumine chose him specifically not just bc of his battle prowess on short-range but his ability to stay mid-air and helping her stay mid-air. throwing her in all angles so every side of osial isnt left out as they both fought. their skills and techniques despite the years and worlds of difference melding in instantaneously after mere seconds of being introduced to each other feels like a form of affection itself in battle its so PERFECT I DIE OVERTHINKING ABT IT" no bc this scene is the most important thing in the whole entire universe YOU'RE SO RIGHT ABOUT IT FEELING LIKE A FORM OF AFFECTION ITSELF the way that they're able to just. to just. im. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM i cant even say anything the scene is Right There it speaks for itself you read it you Understand you get it. you get it. the fact that it happens So Quickly the immediate trust in battle the fact that they work so well together its just. and that had SUCH a huge influence on how i perceive them and how i write them, two very like-minded souls two people who've been through so much that no one else understands but who are able to find that understanding in each other, recognizing that the other has lived for millennia that the other has lost their closest family that the other has people they trust, people they care for, but still ends up isolated in so many ways. pasts and mindsets no one else could understand, seeing so much of themselves mirrored in the other. nothing exact but the similarities, the shared loneliness and hurt and deep buried longing, fuckidfngf. explodes. dies. ive already made a post about this im just repeating myself but man. MAN.

"the xiao deadge brainrot" DEADGE. FUCKIGN SOBBINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

this is the part where i got distracted and suddenly its 9pm instead of 9am and i am just now finishing answering this but also significantly more braindead adn it shows. um. anyways.

"its built up on that confusion and xiao hesitates a lot, but can become fully accepting once he understands it." BASED AS HELL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! what she does for him he does back... "but soon enough the concern he had for her would match the gestures he does in turn." crying shaking bawling sobbing GODDDDDDDD yeah. Yeah.

"i love to explore this certain aspect of their relationship where they do grow to be close, but theres this?? invisible distance, somekind of barrier i cant explain between them especially when they conflict each other with their worldviews and understanding" mmmmm i Think i get this like i am way too braindead to try to put it into words but i think i understand.

THE DOC PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE i literally need to write at LEAST that much for this freakigngnfkng xiaolumi fic <- said as if i am not actively procrastinating writing more for it. but man looking at my guide/plan doc thingy for it i am Praying. 30k feels like so much and such a stretch but i also will like sneeze and the next thing i know there are 5k more words on the page so maybe. Maybe. perhaps. hopefully. Please. maybe.

[homesickhalfling]

I watched Bo's new special Inside today.

#spoilers #Inside #boburnham #howthefuckdoiputthisunderacutidontwannaruinpeoplesfeedswiththiscrap #idontknowhowhashtagswork

---

I felt anxiety before I watched it, almost like I knew it was going to hurt me.

And it did.

About halfway through i realized I had spent a lot of it literally hugging myself.

I sobbed after it was done. Sobbed.

Then I spent half an hour in the fetal position in silence in my room wondering what I was supposed to do now.

He articulated everything I had been feeling but running from for the past few years because I didn't want to acknowledge it or know how to say it, let alone fix it. ("There's that feeling again")

He proved that I was right when I had guessed that making this special would be a difficult regression for him and not good for his mental health. That he'd start questioning his life and his career.

It was hard to watch someone essentially record themselves having a breakdown over the course of a year. Even when he was trying to make me laugh I felt bad for doing it... yet I still laughed.

I feel partially responsible for his mental state. I participated. We all did. We gave him the likes, the views, the follows, the ticket sales. He was a child star and it fucked him up. There's a moment where he's sitting there watching one of his early YouTube videos and I just felt such pain for him. How horrible it must feel to live in the spotlight and be expected to make others happy ("dance you fucking monkey/ watch the skinny kid with the steadily declining mental health as he attempts to give you what he cannot give himself") and no one deserves to live their lives in that state.

He pointed out so expertly how the internet has spun wildly out of control and technology is too accessible and is ruining society. How everyone has to broadcast themselves and their opinions all the time. How kids grow up attached to tech that is rewiring their brains and development.

It was hard to watch. Of course he was funny, he made silly jokes and did silly dances and made fun of people and himself in poignant and catchy ways as he always does... but at the core of it all was this struggle of trying to make sense of a world that doesnt make any fucking sense. That is harmful in almost every way. And not wanting to participate in it anymore but having no way out.

He talked about wanting to kill himself, but not kill himself. I know that exact feeling. I have been saying it for months (maybe not out loud cause I don't want to alarm anyone but...) some days I just dont want to exist.

He talked about his anxiety, about feeling agoraphobia, about how the outside world is like a coal mine. And it's a perfect analogy.

He sang "congratulations" to Bezos. How many times have I said that exsxt thing to people? I say "Congratulations you won capitalism, good for you, now give us all your money."

He filmed himself turning 30. I turn 30 this year. It looked exactly how it feels. Scary. Lonely. Disappointing.

The ending hurt too. Its too real, too "meta". It's unavoidable and hurts to think about: He's come outside and "reentered" but all we are going to do is put him in the spotlight and laugh as he struggles with wanting anything but that. And yet he's releasing this fucking masterpiece... and like... are we not supposed to applaud him for it? It feels like a trap. Which I guess is exactly how he feels. Which just makes me appreciate his genius that much more for being able to convey that so perfectly.

He made me question everything (including my white woman instagram) because of course... what was I gonna do the second I finished watching? Post my opinion about it on social media. Like he said we all do. Like he asked us not to do. He's absolutely right that it's a pointless and empty validation thing that we all do and can't stop doing... and why? What purpose does it serve? ("Just perform for each other, all the time, for no reason")

I just kinda want to crawl in a hole and not participate in society. You know, like how I have always felt. Like my anxiety and depression have been telling me to do for years. That feeling I have to shove down every single morning before I get dressed and go to work. Pay bills. Socialize.

I dont know what to do now. I understand him not wanting to finish the special... because... then what? Just carry on like nothing happened? Go back to "normal"? Or go back to our isolation and wonder if/when things will ever get better for any of us?

Anyway... all of that being said... I think it's an important look in the mirror at where our society stands and what we have become. I think it's exactly what the world needs to hear right now even though it's hard. ("Look into my eyes don't shy away"). Bo is our mirror. A tortured, twisted, broken mirror for our tortured, twisted, and broken society.

And here I am... giving out my opinion that no one asked for or needed or cares about. Like the fucking hypocrite I am.

[crosswordgf]

I think another large problem is the fact that they tried to make the world bigger and it just doesnt work for me at all. it makes the plot suffer and it makes the characters suffer. you’ve got the prison in russia where a LOT of time is spent on setting up new characters and a new setting that honestly is extremely uninteresting. that whole thing should absolutely have been one episode. the new lab which also doesn’t bring anything new to the table and also stops eleven’s whole current arc in its tracks and she has to basically start over from scratch, which could also have been ONE episode. because of this there’s not enough time spent on the actual characters and relationships which have always been the best part of the show. a tiny example is that nancy’s coworker died and she apparently felt nothing at all about that. or maybe she did but they sure didn’t show us that! there's no excitement, no new developments regarding relationships at all, its just either completely standing still or regressing even. nancy and jonathan are growing apart, which could potentially be fun! what new people are they turning into! oops never mind nancy is just remembering how right her 16 year old self was for being into steve. makes no sense AND boring!!!!!!

[megashadowdragon]

blake and yang dont really make sense ( it reeks of direction change given that they gave years of teasing mutual attraction and development  for blacksun while bb didnt get anything that actually hinted at romantic stuff )  but starting from at worst  v7 v6 finale at best  they were starting to tease bb  its obvious that they were now going in that direction. ( what I am saying its likee gave blacksun years of buildup the story moving in that direction then all of a sudden it swerved to bb)

the bb ship could have made sense at one point given their personalities I could imagine a scenario where they worked but the writers would have needed to have put work into it

if they actually worked on bb from the start etc and teased it but because they didnt and instead gave the years of teasing mutual attraction and development to blacksun bb doesnt make sense to happen . even if they did plan for bb to happen from the start which I doubt , given the amount of buildup they gave blacksun without anything for bb they should have changed the plan and just went with blacksun route . how i met your mother shows that sometimes keeping with the plan isnt always the best idea for they had a a planned ending years in advance but in the mean time all the characters got character development that put them past that planned ending.

It felt like regression

"

here is the problem blake and yang didnt show anything that hinted at romantic or sexual attraction to each other at that time they were friends but that doesnt mean they have to be romantically attracted to each other even if yang , blake or both were bisexual

there was nothing that hinted at it in the show

bisexuals can still just be friends with eachother

(sun did actually pursue her romantically he just chose to go back tohis team at v6 because blake at the time didnt need him he didnt give up on her romantically ( I remember the claims that it sunk blacksun when it really didnt

sun didnt give up on her romantically he just said he didnt just go there just because of his romantic feelings he didnt follow her just because he wanted a romantic relationship he wanted to help blake and have her rejoin her friends which happened by v5

that doesnt mean he didnt have romantic feelings for her or want to pursue it when they met up again ( which he outright stated he had a feeling that they would meet up again)

he didnt give up the chance to pursue blake romanticallyy by heading to vacuo with his team

(it would have made sense if sun was told about salem etc and went there with his team to tell theodore about it etc thats an easy excuse to take sun off screen to give more focus to team rwby etc with what will happen in the future )

there is a reason why people like me had said blacksun would happen when they get to vacuo ( lets be real here there was already too many people on screen so they needed to make room to focus on the other characters )

( bb had nothing in v1-5 that hinted at them having romantic feelings for each the justification that we didnt see it or they had time outside of what we saw cant really succed since this is a show we have to see the actual signs blake and yang being close doenst equal evidence for romantic relationship

other or being attracted to each other heck at the dance yang didnt have any problems with handing blake over to dance with sun and blake chose to dance with sun .

and I have to ask would you say the same thing if sun and yangs genders were swapped ( I have seen many times bb shippers go I am only saying this because blacksun was ahet ship

which makes me reply with the above to anyone I get into an argument about this with since I have seen people make it clear that their problem with blacksun was because it was het they called it forced on us because it was a het ship going there were plenty of believable w/w ships in show they could do but they didnt so they called blacksun forced

specifically citing it being a het ship

)

also imagine if after the years of teasing renora suddenly ren was paired with someone else romantically when nora was around I imagine people would get pissed

I mean seriously given the amount of buildup it would have made more sense for them to start teasing freezerburn

blacksun got all the buildup with no payoff bb gets the payoff with no buildup

again we didnt see anything that teased bb as anything more as friends until at best v6 finale and the justification that sun left in v6 beginning is a bad justification that didnt sink blacksun or mean sun gave up his chances for a romantic relationship

( lets be real here everyone knew at the time team rwby would eventually return to vacuo and that roosterteeth hada limited budget so they wanted to focus more on team rwby etc

and there wasnt anything for blake and yang to rekindle besides friendship

“Which is what Sun meant when said “It was never about that, brainiac!” to Neptune saying “It feels like you’re just letting her go”. It didn’t mean “Oh I never actually had a thing for Blake, she was just a friend to me”. It meant “I didn’t follow and help her to try and get in a relationship with her, I did it because she needed help and she’s someone I care about. But now, she needs to be with her team, and while I would like to be in a romantic relationship with her, her needs have always been more important than my wants. She needed my help, and now she needs to be with her team.”.And while both of them seemingly would have loved to stay together, reuniting with their respective teams was the bigger priority, as they’ve been away from their teams for far too long. “

also lets be real here blake and yang had been separated after v3 and people didnt argue that bb was forever sunk they reasoned they would get together when they come back to each other so the notion that blacksun shippers shouldnt have the same mindset when blacksun got years of teasing mutual attraction and development up to and including the v6 goodbye scene where like morning follows night song while bb didnt makes me roll my eyes

( also there was nothing about v6 scene that came off as ship sinking the notion thats not how you write a ship sinking but even if thats what they attempted to do and they did intend for the v6 finale scenes to be romantic ( they werent inherently romantic ) it would still follow as a direction change

there is no doub

"

the issue isnt people assuming heterosexuality the issue is that they gave no hints of romantic attraction or sexual attraction

youdont get to defend throwing away the years of teasing mutual attraction and development for blacksun to force bb

by going why do you assume heterosexuality by default saying but the writers said that they still have time to determine sexuality it is irrelevent for the bb case given all the stuff blacksun had gotten

even if blake was bisexual and was established as such from the start by the writers it wouldnt change the fact bb was forced as heck

( I actually recall in another fndm where a female character was blatantly attracted to women to the point some accused her of harassment and she had been friends with that guy and later on the guy was ship teased with that girl like the girls friend hinted at such) I wonder how the fndm of rwby would have reacted to that situation

and isnt a hint to bb becoming canon because it

it doesnt change the fact blacksun got years of teasing mutual attraction and development blacksun got

like all the teasing and buildup and hints renora got

I always knew that crwby stated that about sexualities that is irrelevant to the question of is bb forced or not

because blacksun got years of teasing mutual attraction and development that it deserved a payoff to it

while bb had nothing

what they said could easily be applied with freezerburn ( weiss had no one she was seriously teased with and yang didnt have anyone but at the time they only showed attraction to guys

@commanderkurama

@the8worldking

@spoonoftar

Not Vexed Viewer pretending he wants Bumbleby to be canon just so he can accuse the writers of queerbaiting

[antiloreolympus]

10 Anti LO Asks

1. god bless the hearts of lo fanartists bc ive seen how lo hades looks and he does not look like the pretty boy 20-something model the fanart makes him out to be ❤️

2. I see LO stans praise it as "empowering to all women" and i'm like where? Perse doesnt get to chose to be sexualized or use her own powers, so how is that "empowering"? More so, every woman has a different definition of empowerment, but LO only promotes a very rigid idea of what "empowerment" is through Rachel's privileged worldview. Artemis can reject sex and be empowered. Aphrodite can embrace her sexuality and be empowered, and the list goes on. Rachel doesn't get to dictate that for us.

3. The writing in LO is so contradictory and I don't get why? Like Hades said he chose to rule the UW, but now it's saying he didn't want to be king, but he chose to be king anyway and loves the perks of it? Persephone says she doesn't want to be associated with her AOW, but then she changed her name to "hi i'm a murderer"? Hera flipped immediately on her disdain for Hades chasing after a 19 year old, and there's so many other examples. IDK whats even going on and why RS doesn't keep track?

4. It's no shock it didn't end up on the NYT Hardcover, YA, or Paperback lists because you have to sell tens of thousands of unique copies in a week to get on there, which we could see just wasn't happening. However the fact it didn't even make the NYT Graphic Novel list means LO severely undersold. You don't need to sell much to get on that one and the fact it didn't is a bit of a blow to the supposed "phenomenon" LO claims to be when it didn't perform well in it's main country of popularity.

5. Some of the most popular webtoons on there, up there with the popularity of LO, all took off several months and in some cases nearly a full year off to recharge and they're as popular as ever once they came back, IDK what's going on in RS' head but there's no real excuse for her to not take a break (esp with books coming out) to recharge and let other comics build up an audience instead of the marketing team only focusing on her. she can afford to not be on the top spot for a few months.

6. dont get me wrong she still looks and acts like a child today but s1 persephone was especially always drawn with with baby-like features that its just off-putting. like why were there SO many panels of her with big baby eyes looking like she was about to cry and stuff? like its just weird? i guess now she upgraded from looking like a elementary school child to now looking like at high school freshman. rachel why did you design her to look so young and make her barely legal its so weird 😭

7. I don't get how Rachel claims LO is "pro female sexuality" when it doesn't promote that. Persephone is forced to not even look at another guy, and her only sexual experience has to be assault. The Maidens are framed as regressive liars w/ asexuality being something to "get over", Aphrodite, Minthe, and Thetis are all shamed and punished for consenting sex (esp Minthe). Meanwhile the men can cheat and sleep around (specifically Hades) and it's praised. That's not "pro female sexuality" at all.

8. A big part of why HxP is a popular ship is because there's the idea of Persephone embracing the temptation of darkness in her, but also Hades wanting to be a better man for her. They allow each other to grow. The problem in LO is that they're excused for everything, have no actual pushback, and they stay the same awful people they started as. LO doesn't depict them growing together, they're both regressing into the same awful person (so LO Hades times 2) and RS claims that as "development".

9. At the end of chapter 35 when Minthe says “Hey asshole” she has pointed ears and then round ears and the panels are literally under each other. I don’t think RS ever was consistent not matter whose been working on LO

10. rachel im tired of waiting show us how bad the third volume cover is now. the logo better be covering hades' face too for good measure.

[doctorguilty]

since my last two rounds as surv on the ptb were against fucking. hillbilly??? I decided to finally try out some ghostface and like. honestly contrary to popular believe from whiny people who think gf "didnt need a buff" he's arguably HARDER to play now, not in a bad way but like, I feel there's MORE skill required to manage his power

cause like firstly, they tweaked the reveal mechanic a ton so like, revealing him is not so bugged on the surv end where like you can be looking directly at him and the game wont register it. it seems to work like, very well, having me playing as him and playing a good 3 matches against him in my ptb trial yesterday. also there's "Reveal progression now regresses over time if a Survivor loses line-of-sight (used to be lost completely immediately)." which no one whining about him is talking about but my GOD this change is rough as ghostface

secondly like, I Get a lot of what's going on with the addons now, like even the ones that seemed strange (like survs on hook take 3 seconds to reveal etc ) because given the improved reveal mechanics. the object of the game is HEAVILY like, stay in night shroud as much as physically possible and that's easier said than done

I'm already forgetting the exact numbers for his pre-patch add ons but like basically 100% of the time ghostface brings 1 shroud recovery add on (usually the pen), and then sometimes they'll stack a second shroud recovery add on with it, if they're not gonna go with the drop leg or or monocular.

Well you can't do that now, you get ONE standard shroud recovery option (matchbook for 6 seconds) and/or a conditional one insta recharge which is either the wallet (breaking pallet or wall) or the tape (basic attack putting surv into dying), or the cinch straps (whiffing doesnt break shroud)

my first test run I just used brown addons and got like whiplash from how easily I was getting revealed, got a good 0 kills lmao......... second test run I tried drivers license (unchanged) and the wallet, didn't get much use out of the license I feel but the wallet proved VERY useful I like that one a lot, cause like, basically yeah anytime you're broken out of shroud (which is. significantly more than in the past), the cooldown is gonna hurt

I've yet to try more combos but the choice making is definitely harder than it seems on paper and I feel the devs kinda sculpted him into the killer he was conceptualized as--EXTREMELY reliant on his stealth and the player's utilization of the map itself which was something talked about in his development video, it's why you mark faster if you lean + stalk like he's meant to be very blended in with the environment and like a quasi jumpscare

honestly my biggest frustration is, as much as I appreciate him getting new chase music its WAY to fucking loud and I can barely hear where the surv is going, which is like OOF when I rely so much on audio cues which is like!! very in spirit of the character like hello,,,,, lower the volume pls ;;;;;; I'm not the only one with that opinion though :( hopefully the devs take some constructive criticism on that

but YEAH anyway like. those are my general first impressions, like its not a nerf, but it's also not quite the enormous buff people believe it is. its very much to me like, refining the character into the vision the devs originally had for him which just comes with some pros and cons and having to adapt to it! I dont dislike it, I'm so happy he got his addons reworked like I've wanted that for SO LONG, just defs a challenge to re-master him

...also while he did get a little buff against loops I'm thinking ......... he might struggle more with swfs than he previously did e_e not 100% certain yet but. kinda have a bad feeling about it given the reveal mechanic tweaks