#But it was beyond time it happened for these characters

[somnambulic-thing]

This fic is part of my come as you are universe but can be read as a standalone.

Series Masterlist

silly

Eddie Munson x gn!reader we're early/mid 20s, 18+

Words: 790

Summary: Eddie has an important question.

|established relationship, fluff, silly people in love, allusions to sex|

A/N: Hi, long time no see. I have been playing with those two a little the past week and am adding just a little more... lore... to the universe. xD Even though they can function as stand-alones, they all are connected and things will be picked up on in some way in other parts. This is posted out of order and happens before messy, but I will follow up on the cliffhanger in that one at some point! Enough blah blah.

“Would you still love me if I had a tail?”

Surprised by the interruption but not so much by the question itself you stop reading mid-sentence - lips still parted in pursuit of shaping the word Ape-man - and look up.

Eddie is on the floor somewhere, out of sight from your place on the mattress - something about not being able to concentrate on your reading if he can see you do it - and so you speak into the room as if you’re answering the inquiry of a ghost.

“What kind of tail?”

A huff from the beyond, then he sits up like a Jack-in-the-box, looking comically dismayed. Even his hair is in on the act, sticking out in every cardinal direction as if to flee from the horrors.

“Sooo,” he starts with big, troubled eyes, tucking his chin back, “there is a scenario where you, uh, wouldn’t?”

“I didn’t say that,” you answer drily, only able to hold back the laughter tickling your throat because you know it will further tickle his antics.

His arms shoot up like he’s a man in crisis of faith.

“You kinda did!”

“Did not,” you place your finger in the gutter of the book before you shut it around it and lean in closer. “Just curious. What kind of tail?”

“Answer me first,” he demands, shuffling to sit up on his haunches like a wild thing ready to pounce. “If you wouldn’t love me with a hideous tail, you don’t deserve me with a sexy one.”

This does the trick; laughter bursts from your lungs. His lips purse in that way that tells you he’s so proud he cracked you up but not ready to break character yet and join in. You want to kiss him stupid.

“Eddie,” you gulp once more and force your face into a solemn expression. “That you even have to ask is an insult to my devotion to you.”

“Still haven’t heard a yeehess—“

“Would you love me if I had a tail?”

“Fuck yeah,” no hesitation, just excitement. Then he’s blushing, fingers fiddling with the edge of a blanket close to him. “What, uh, whaaat kind of tail?”

“Oh?” you pull up your brows. “Is there a scenario in wh—“

“Nuh-uh,” he shakes his head, waves a scolding finger at you and pushes up from the floor at last to crawl to you. “Don’t even fucking start—“

“But—“ The scolding finger becomes a silencing one, pushes against your lips to keep them sealed.

“Nuh-uh!” His cheeks have spilled the blush all over his face now, right to the tips of his ears and he’s pinning you down with the look in his eyes alone that is pure determination.

It’s mesmerizing.

You faintly register the The Island of Dr Moreau being plucked from your hand, hear a dull thump when the book lands somewhere in the beyond and Eddie mutter “weird fucking shit” under his breath. His lower lip vanishes between his teeth as his hands find your knees to swiftly push your legs apart.

“Sweetheart,” he says softly as he moves to kneel between your thighs and take your face into his hands. “This isn’t a question of would I still love you but of what will I imagine in my depraved little fantasies…”

The calculated drop of his voice spreads like liquid heat through your body as it sneaks past your eardrums. The urge to press your legs together doesn’t go unnoticed as your knees weakly squeeze his sides.

He just smiles and waits for your reply.

“You—,” you swallow, then clear your throat, “you are free to imagine whatever serves the horny best.”

A sigh, a shake of his mussed head and he brings your foreheads together. “But that’s not the same…” he nearly whispers, stroking your cheeks with his thumbs. “I wanna play with your tail, you know?”

You nod. Hypnotized.

“Yeah?”

“That’s why I asked about yours…”

“So it’s a yes?” His lips are so close to yours that he speaks into your mouth. “You’d still love me if I had a tail?”

You try to kiss him. And he pulls away. “Dude…” you huff and weakly thump a fist against his chest, then grab hold of his shirt so he can’t move any further.

“It’s a one-syllable word and then I’m aaaall yours.”

“Asshole.”

“That’s two,” he grins, licks his lip. “And that too.”

“Yes!”

“Fucking finally.”

He rushes to kiss you but you hold him off. It’s a little painful. “You know I’d love you if you were… uhn, half goat or… or something.”

He groans, eyes rolling up for a moment. “Uhm, yeah, fuck,” he sneaks his arms around your waist, “keep that thought for another time. We have details to discuss…”

caya tag list:

@trashmouth-richie @the-unforgivenn @onegirlmanytales @chaoticgood-munson @spenciesprincess

@nailbatanddungeon @mrsjellymunson @spiderman-stilinski @streamafterlaughter @strangerfreaks

@bebe07011 @whenshelanded

general tag list:

@bettyfrommars @dr-aculaaa @deathbecomesthem @songforeddiemunson @raccoonboywrites

@jo-harrington @lunatictardis @skrzydlak @slutforstabbings @eddieslooneymoonie

@storiesbyrhi @thecapricunt1616 @fracturedarkness @emma-munson @writinginthetwilight

[kinkandkreep]

Celebratory Blue Lock Boi Yandere Interpretations: Ryusei Shidou, Yoichi Isagi, Meguru Bachira, Reo Mikage, Rin Itoshi

A/N:...Hey hey y'all...🙂 Ok, so I fuckin' lied I am so sorry. 😭 These was sposed to be for my birthday yestaday but the day got so busy and I was tied den a mug, so posting these did not happen. 🙃 But! Alas, I am here now, and I have for you all my introductory yandere interpretations for 5 of the blue lock boyos!

Keep in mind, I am still getting caught up on the anime so if anything reads off, I apologize. I'll very likely either come back and adjust these as I become more familiar with their personalities or just post a whole new set for each boy.

Anyway, enjoy!

Ryusei Shidou: 

Let me just say right off the bat that I get the strong notion that Ryusei is gonna swiftly become my favorite character the more exposed I am to him (like I already love his design and that weird sexual edge his character possesses 😏)

That aside, as a Yandere, I envision that he maintains that same intense energy he has about football, it just manifests a little differently

You make his heart “explode,” in a similar fashion to his precious football- either that, or you possess an “explosive” quality within yourself that draws him in

I saw someone say that outside of a few specific circumstances, Ryu is a pretty chill dude, which I think is 100% true

And I believe this can even apply to you, in the Yandere sense as well

Ryusei can be intense, and a little monopolizing 

He's also somewhat possessive 

But for the most part, as long as he knows you're his and you continue to make him “explode,” Ryusei isn't the worst Yan to have

Now, in my research, I have seen some interpretations of him where he’s much more sadistic than I personally envision him to be, which of course is fine, but just know that my Ryusei can’t really be bothered to act sadistically unless you try to fight him

Exactly why you’d try to do that is beyond me, but if you did happen to want to start a physical altercation with Ryu, he may be inclined to be a little rough with you, just to show a bit of what he’s capable of and also keep you in check

Yoichi Isagi:

I just look at Yoichi and a single phrase comes to mind- “he’s a sweetheart unless provoked”

You, provoke him

You make this nagging little voice in the back of his head make the Spongebob “wee-woo” sound at like max volume every time you’re in each other’s vicinity

Yandere Yoichi adores you

He’s like a little pup around you, always wanting attention and affirmation and reassurance that he’s the best, and the he’s going to be the best, and that throughout it all you’ll never leave him

But! He can also be kind of intense and maybe a bit of an asshole

Like just look at him and tell me you don’t get that vibe

I’m new to the game as it relates to Blue Lock but from what I’ve gleaned, Yoichi has a sort of metaphorical switch that turns on and off depending on the circumstance

Things get heavy when he’s on the field, and that’s when his “Ego” comes out

It makes him more cocky and confident, from what I understand, and I’d say the same thing applies where it concerns you

For the most part, Yandere Yoichi is just your average puppy with a thigh fetish

But let the “Ego” come out, and now he’s more domineering, controlling and patronizing

Try not to trigger that part of him though, and Yoichi is actually a pretty ok Yandere to have

Meguru Bachira:

Meg’s a weirdo but one of the lovable variety

He’s a very eccentric character, as I’m sure anyone who’s familiar with Blue Lock will know

He talks about the “monster” that inhabits his psyche and manifests itself when he plays soccer

I don’t particularly subscribe to the idea that this “monster” influences his actions on a normal, day to day basis (though that could be the case and I just missed it in my research) but I can definitely see how one would think it does

I will say that years of simple…cohabitation (?) with the monster has definitely left an indelible mark on Meguru’s mind

Yandere Meguru especially 

To Yandere Meguru Bachira, you are perhaps the most important thing in his life

Being bullied for so long and so relentlessly probably wasn’t the best for his mental and emotional wellbeing, as you can imagine, so Meguru has been in desperate need of someone to come along and show him genuine love and support

He’s found that in you, and that’s part of the reason his Yandere personality/tendencies make an appearance when he’s with you

He’s definitely clingy and wants all your attention all the time, and he’s also not very knowledgeable on what it means to give someone their personal space

He doesn’t give you much autonomy either, really preferring to do things for you when given the chance

He can get a little intense, but he’d never hurt you 

Physically, at least

And if by some off chance he were to hurt you otherwise, it would never be on purpose

All that said, I do kind of think that Bachira would be one of the slightly more uncomfortable Yans to have, simply on account of his neediness 

Reo Mikage: 

FIrst off, let me just say, eat the rich 😤

Chile when I was doin’ my research and saw dis dude’s frankly ridiculous net worth I was appalled 

But if he smart enough to know what to do with the money and assets then I guess it’s whateva 🤷🏾‍♀️

Anyway, that aside, let’s focus back up 😂

I could potentially see Reo being one of the more strict Yan’s to have 

He just has so much to protect, and that includes you

He’s also probably very used to getting the things he wants and having things go his way that he can’t imagine you not reciprocating his feelings, or at the very least seeing the benefit in choosing him over everyone else

And as we’ve seen (me only partially really, I’m still makin’ my way through the show 🙃) he already has some form of an attachment issue as it relates to Nagi, or alternatively, the things he’s invested time and energy in and on

Which, as you can imagine, would include you, should he decide to pursue you

As a Yandere, Reo is admittedly controlling and a bit smothering

But he’s just like that ‘cus he wants to ensure that nothing will separate you two!

It’s innocent really, honest!

And given Reo’s reputation, it would be rather difficult to convince others that he’s, well, kinda crazy if you were so inclined

But other than that, as long as you remain loyal, Reo’s a pretty fair Yandere

Rin Itoshi:

Whoo boy, this one’s a tough nut to crack

I honestly think Rin is more tsun than yan but I could definitely see where the Yandere aspect of him could potentially rear its head

I’m not 100% up on my knowledge of what the hell his deal is with his brother, but from what I’ve gathered, there’s this mostly one-sided rivalry (on Rin’s part) towards Sae (his brother, for the uninformed) because he (Sae) refuses to acknowledge Rin in soccer and he abandoned their shared soccer dream from when they were little

That all being the case, I really like the concept that Rin is a Yandere for you because A.) something about you warms something cold and dead inside him and B.) you recognize him as talented and capable outside of his brother’s influence, and he (Rin) desperately clings to that affirmation 

Rin is undoubtedly possessive, wanting nothing more than to hide you away where only he can access you or, alternatively, make it known to everyone, in whatever way, that you belong to him

Rin is also somewhat domineering and controlling, as he still doesn’t want anything to tarnish his reputation

I think as a Yandere he’s a little more open to PDA (not by much at all, but just a little) 

I also think that, as a Yandere, Rin can be fairly intense without realizing it

Like during games and whatnot, he ups the ante ‘cus he knows you’re watching and he wants to impress you, keep your attention, and have earned your praise when he’s done

That could also apply to him normally sorta, but I think the behavior is more prominent in Yandere mode

All-in-all, Yandere Rin isn’t the most terrible, he’s mostly just…needy, in his own special way

[sassenach77yle]

What are ye laughing at, a nighean?” Her father loomed out of the night, smelling of horses. “Everything,” she said, scooching over to make room for him to sit beside her. It was true. Everything seemed suddenly bright, the candlelight from the windows of the Big House, the fireflies in the grass, the glow of Roger’s face when he told her his desire. She could still feel the touch of his mouth on hers; it fizzed in her blood.

Jamie reached up and fielded a passing firefly, holding it for a moment cupped in the dark hollow of his hand, where it flashed on and off, the cool light seeping through his fingers. Far off, she heard a brief snatch of her mother’s voice, coming through an open window;

Claire was singing “Clementine.” Now the boys—and Roger—were howling at the moon, though it was no more than a pale sickle on the horizon. She felt her father’s body shake with silent laughter, too.

“It reminds me of Disneyland,” she said on impulse.

“Oh, aye? Where’s that?” “It’s an amusement park—for children,” she added, knowing that while there were such things as amusement parks in places like London and Paris, these were purely adult places. No one ever thought of entertaining children now, beyond their own games and the occasional toy. “Daddy and Mama took me there every summer,” she said, slipping back without effort to the hot, bright days and warm California nights.

“The trees all had little sparkling lights in them—the fireflies reminded me.” Jamie spread his palm; the firefly, suddenly free, pulsed to itself once or twice, then spread its wings with a tiny whir and lifted into the air, floating up and away.

“Dwelt a miner, forty-niner, and his daugh-ter, Clementine . . .”

“What was it like, then?” he asked curiously. “Oh . . . it was wonderful.” She smiled to herself, seeing the brilliant lights of Main Street, the music and mirrors and beautiful, beribboned horses of King Arthur’s Carrousel. “There were . . . rides, we called them. A boat, where you could float through the jungle on a river, and see crocodiles and hippopotamuses and headhunters . . .” “Headhunters?” he said, intrigued. “Not real ones,” she assured him. “It’s all make-believe—but it’s . . . well, it’s a world to itself. When you’re there, the real world sort of disappears; nothing bad can happen there.

They call it ‘The Happiest Place on Earth’—and for a little while, it really seems that way.”

“Light she was, and like a fairy, and her shoes were number nine, Herring boxes without topses, sandals were for Clementine.”“And you’d hear music everywhere, all the time,” she said, smiling. “Bands—groups of musicians playing instruments, horns and drums and things—would march up and down the streets, and play in pavilions. . . .” “Aye, that happens in amusement parks. Or it did, the once I was in one.” She could hear a smile in his voice, as well. “Mm-hm. And there are cartoon characters—I told you about cartoons—walking around. You can go up and shake hands with Mickey Mouse, or—” “With what?” “Mickey Mouse.” She laughed. “A big mouse, life-size—human-size, I mean. He wears gloves.” “A giant rat?” he said, sounding slightly stunned. “And they take the weans to play with it?” “Not a rat, a mouse,” she corrected him. “And it’s really a person dressed up like a mouse.” “Oh, aye?” he said, not sounding terribly reassured. “Yes. And an enormous carrousel with painted horses, and a railroad train that goes through the Rainbow Caverns, where there are big jewels sticking out of the walls, and colored streams with red and blue water . . . and orange-juice bars. Oh, orange-juice bars!” She moaned softly in ecstatic remembrance of the cold, tart, overwhelming sweetness. “It was nice, then?” he said softly.

“Thou art lost and gone forever, Dreadful sor-ry . . . Clementine.”

“Yes,” she said, sighed, and was silent for a moment. Then she leaned her head against his shoulder, and wrapped her hand around his arm, big and solid. “You know what?” she said, and he made a small interrogatory noise in reply.

It was nice—it was great—but what I really, really loved about it was that when we were there, it was just the three of us, and everything was perfect. Mama wasn’t worrying about her patients, Daddy wasn’t working on a paper—they weren’t ever silent or angry with each other. Both of them laughed—we all laughed, all the time . . . while we were there.” He made no reply, but tilted his head so it rested against hers. She sighed again, deeply.

“Jemmy won’t get to go to Disneyland—but he’ll have that. A family that laughs—and millions of little lights in the trees.”

A breath of snow and ashes

Season 7 episode 2 “The Happiest Place on Earth”

[sunnysideaeggs]

some criticisms i have of episode 2. read the tags first please.

disclaimer: i am a targtowers’ stan first and foremost. that means: aegon, helaena, aemond and daeron. they’re my favorite characters. that’s where my ‘loyalty’ stands. everyone else (including alicent) comes after.

helaena’s grief should’ve been a bigger point in the episode. this is HER episode and aegon’s (i’m not complaining about him but her screentime was so low). everyone else, rhaenyra, alicent, yada yada is secondary.

alicent can light up candles for her enemy’s son but can’t even attend the funeral of her grandson 🙄 she doesn’t cry, curse the blacks, want to bathe in the blood of jaehaerys’ killers, or can even bring herself to say his name.

i love aegon’s performance. i love all of his grief manifested in rage and anger. he cries but he will kick everyone later. tom go get your emmy.

girl your daughter just lost a son and you want to talk about you fucking your bodyguard. i’m tired of her. helaena is with all right of ignoring her.

once upon a time there was a boy that loved horses 😭 jaehaerys my dear

a larys/aegon scene is all i could wish for. the cold mastery of secrets and torture combined with the unstoppable wrath of a wounded man. i need more of them.

i like how the funeral seems, by all accounts, normal but by helaena’s viewpoint everything is too much. the people claim for her showing support but it’s all noise. the carriage showing her little boy so that people know who to blame but it only reminds her more of what happened. he even looks like he’s sleeping.

tbh this scene shows how rhaenyra doesn’t fucking care about helaena and her children. the first thought she had when she heard of the news wasn’t to have compassion or empathy, but to do damage control and worry about her reputation.

lmao i don’t have a clue what daemon’s intentions and rationality is. he only cares about looking mighty and dangerous to other people even when he does dumb shit, then justifies it. he lives only for other people’s opinions but then everyone hates his ass lol. dilffailure.

also he’s the embodiment of living for a dick measuring contest he ends up losing. all of daemon’s behavior can be attributed to erectile dysfunction.

how the writers found time for an oc prostitute having a mommy kink scene with aemond but didn’t have more time for a longer scene with helaena and literally anyone is beyond me.

aemond talking about his regret for luke but not about the death of his nephew 💀 luke died like three years ago condal pls get over it. aemond would care more about jaehaerys than poor little luke.

some much needed baela character development. i love characters that are like the female version of their dad but then also fucking hate their dad lol

i liked the tidbits of the dragonseeds during the episode. i’d like some nettles too :) but i guess the only female and canonically black character is a little too much for this show amirite :)

of course daemon would never be able to bend to anyone he considers inferior, much less rhaenyra, who under any other circumstance would be seen as ‘lesser than him’. it reminds him of his failures. i’m glad we’re on the same page.

aegon never had a chance right? aegon was literally raised by hightowers in love with targaryens. he never would’ve been able to surpass viserys and rhaenyra in otto and alicent’s eyes. nothing he did could’ve changed that.

otto’s little laugh cost him a job lol. i’m sad we didn’t get his cats.

the focus on rhaenyra in the arryk/erryk fight is too much for me. once again, leave secondary characters have their moments instead of shoving r or a down my throat please. this is their especial moment, their last moment. rhaenyra being all 😨🧍🏼‍♀️ between their shots does nothing for the scene.

otto’s realization of his life’s work being flushed down the drain is so touching and painful in a way to me. he’s like tywin if he lived long enough to see cersei and tommen fuck everything up.

‘i have sinned’ ‘i do not wish to hear of it’ that’s peak cersei and tywin from that one scene when she confessed the incest.

daeron exists? yay. and once again i’m fucking tired of alicent not reacting to mention of daeron, not comforting helaena, bashing aemond, ignoring aegon. where’s the love for her children?

the scene of otto putting resting his face on his hands? chills. it should’ve lingered there. showcase otto’s regret? grief? idk. pity it just lasted half a second because we needed to see alicent once more.

from now on, alicent is cancelled for me. i don’t care anymore about her. any parent that leaves their child in distress to go fuck can eat shit. i gave that treatment to daemon in laena’s funeral and i’m giving it to her.

we have more sex scenes of alicent than we have of daemon and aegon combined. yet she’s the pious queen and they’re the lechers. condal please write accordingly.

how do i watch a show when i don’t care for the two main characters, because they’re cardboard cuts of women who don’t do anything? i don’t know.

[captainhunnicutt]

One of my all time favorite episodes is "The Yalu Brick Road," and sure, part of it is because it's written by Mike - but I think it's also a really interesting study in how BJ uses humor to diffuse any sort of situation. I should preface all of this with, yes, I understand this is an episode that is pure sitcom comedy. The absurdity of the situation is the humor, and we all knew that nothing drastic was ever going to happen to Hawkeye and BJ. They weren't going to die, and even if they actually got captured - they would make it back to the 4077. I suppose there's an argument to be made that by Henry dying, it opened up a world of possibilities where any member of the 4077th wasn't safe - but I've yet to come across someone who truly believed Hawkeye and BJ weren't going to come out of this situation in any other way besides comedic flare.

It's no secret that I think BJ stands out as a character whose complexity goes beyond the surface of his seemingly laid-back demeanor. I think there's a lot of reasons why he appears that way, but maybe it's not a true and accurate representation of him as a whole - but that's another post for another time. In "The Yalu Brick Road," the idea that Hawkeye and BJ are almost captured by Ralph (a single North Korean), who in turn actually wants to be captured by Americans... and they all mutually surrender to one another is just absurd. It's a perfect sitcom plot line. It takes something potentially serious and flips it on its head and makes it ridiculous.

As drafted doctors, one might think that BJ and Hawkeye's reactions to every situation from the time the jeep wrecks is so absurd and unrealistic - and to an extent it is. While I've never been a drafted doctor, I can't imagine that I would remain as calm as they both did. I think it could also be argued that BJ's character was notoriously "calm" and "collected," and his reactions to everything might not have seemed entirely out of character. But... why is that? What is it about what makes BJ tick that makes the calmness in the most absurd situation actually work?

I think it's because Mike recognized that BJ's calmness is rooted in several fundamental parts of his character - starting first with his general professionalism and competence. He's a highly skilled surgeon (yes, Hawkeye is as well and anything that I say is not to negate anything about Hawkeye. I am just explaining my opinion on why Mike made the choices he did for BJ and only BJ.) I think when you're as confident in your skills as BJ was, that easily translates into a steady demeanor under pressure. He can't perform in the OR if he's a nervous mess. It's how he gets out of tight situations - and maybe subconsciously those same methods are applied in the face of either a.) potentially captures or b.) being lost in the middle of a war. I guess what I'm saying is that this level of professionalism is a cornerstone of BJ's character, and it's not really surprising that it would extend to moments of potentially personal danger.

The Korean War presented an array of horrific and absurd situations, and humor becomes a vital coping mechanism for all of those at the 4077th. I've often wondered if the wildness of the A-plot in Yalu is Mike's way of commenting on the absurdity of war in general. How 99% of the situations that these men, women, and children found themselves in is because of the insanity of others. That it is absolutely absurd to think of a war as anything other that blatantly insane, and there are real people impacted and facing ridiculous decisions and situations day in and day out. And that sometimes, the only thing we can do to maintain our sanity is to laugh. By cracking jokes, by being sarcastic, by being himself - BJ shields himself from the potentially overwhelming fear and stress of the situation that could easily consume him. Instead of firing bullets to keep himself safe, he's firing off quips and jokes. It's the one trait of his that never waivers throughout the entire series - and one of the main reasons Yalu works.

The absurdities (I am so sorry for reusing this word as much as I have) of war and touching on them throughout the series helps balance the line between comedy and really tragedy, and showing how the characters cope with the bizarre reality of their situations hits in different ways for different people. BJ's ability to find humor in the absolute absurdity in Yalu, and just the war in general, is a reflection of this broader theme throughout MASH.

I think the fact that he was going through all of the potential danger and fear alongside Hawkeye helped BJ respond and react in the most typical BJ way possible. No reaction. Nothing out of the ordinary. I think the presence of Hawkeye was a significant factor in BJ's overall calmness. Their connection runs deep, and it's not even about Beejhawk. Whether you ship them together or you don't - it's very hard to deny that their connection exists and that they really help keep the other tethered to reality and focusing on the light at the end of the tunnel. I think on some level, BJ just knew that as long as Hawkeye was right there with him, and going through everything as well, they will get out of every situation. He draws strength from their relationship, and sometimes I think this was Mike's way of giving a nod to Alan for welcoming him with open arms, for fostering a community where people could grow and take risks and learn new things, and for just being his friend. The bond between Mike and Alan wouldn't exist without the bond between BJ and Hawkeye, and I think Mike deliberately putting the characters in a potentially really bad situation - but coming out of it unscathed and together - speaks volumes.

"The Yalu Brick Road" is, in my opinion, one of the funnier episodes - but I really love and appreciate that Mike knew exactly who BJ was and knew exactly how BJ would react - and nothing felt weird or out of place. None of it felt forced. The reactions felt aligned with the character arcs, and Mike's ultimate vision of who BJ was and who BJ was going to become.

I also love that Mike saw an opportunity to put Alan in a sidecar and without hesitating took it. Such a BJ move.

[minnaci]

okay. whipped out my laptop again for apology tour. same disclaimers apply: i'm not a hellaverse blog (or, if i am, i'm very much in denial about it), i enjoy the show and the characters, and my opinions are informed by my personal lived experiences. apology tour spoilers ahead.

i've done a lot of scrolling through comments and posts since watching apology tour and, while many good points were made, i'm not sure that any of them sufficiently sum up how conflicted i feel about this episode. i'll try to hopefully stumble my way into a coherent analysis.

full warning, it will be blitz-centric, but there is enough nuance in my heart to be sympathetic to stolas, too. both of them fucked up! i just happen to identify more strongly with blitz.

tldr: the showrunners said it best. stolas is not quite as self-aware as he should be, and blitz... is blitz. cw for spoilers and discussions of american racism (particularly antiblackness) and classism.

this crux of the issue in apology tour continues to be miscommunication, which is heavily influenced by 1. both blitz's and stolas's pasts and 2. the sociopolitical context in which they operate.

1 . STOLAS

stolas was a victim of emotional neglect in his childhood, and then a victim of his emotionally abusive wife in his adulthood. he, as he so aptly implies in apology tour, has never truly felt wanted beyond what he could provide to his family. one of the only times we have ever seen stolas happy was at the circus as a child, where he developed a fleeting, parasocial admiration for blitz.

in this way, stolas is painfully, achingly relatable. while he grew up in a disgusting amount of material wealth, he has been deprived of the one thing you cannot buy with money: unconditional love. he yearns for the type of romance he reads about, the type of passionate desire that he watches in his telenovelas, and when blitz comes along— the one, shining memory in stolas's otherwise dull childhood— stolas falls into the fantasy.

and that's exactly what it is. in the beginning, stolas doesn't really want blitz. he wants what blitz represents— a charming, seductive figure to ravish him, to hold him close, to show him that he is desirable and make him feel wanted. it's a fantasy at the price of the key to stolas's job— a fantasy that is, from an outsider's perspective, easily explained by racial fetishization. more on this later.

to stolas, it's a small price to pay. the grimoire, a token piece of power to the goetias, in exchange for the one thing that stolas has always wanted? sign stolas up! stolas has never had to worry about his livelihood, nor his safety— not in any way that matters. not in any way that blitz would have had to.

stolas is ignorant. he is naive and unaware of how the world works. this remains true when he falls for blitz, when he plans to "set them free" (a la "when i see him"), even after he confesses and his fairy-tale fantasies come crashing down around him. he is not in a place where he can comprehend the effects of class on his relationships because it is not something he has ever had to consider before.

all that said, none of that invalidates the way that stolas feels when blitz explodes at him in full moon. stolas setting his boundaries at the beginning of apology tour ("i feel uncomfortable when you talk to me that way") is valid. it's actually an example of communication gone right in this episode, in that stolas explicitly communicates how blitz's actions make him feel.

his resultant upset when blitz keeps pushing him and antagonizing him is similarly valid. his decision to go to verosika's party is valid. my main point here is: while i don't particularly enjoy stolas's actions in full moon or even in apology tour, i can empathize with wanting to be wanted by someone so badly that it basically ruins your life.

again, stolas is ignorant. he lacks self awareness. he is emotionally immature and lacks empathy. but the message here isn't "rich people can't feel heartbreak", at least for me. the message is "even though he is hurt, stolas needs to understand that his actions have consequences, and that blitz experiences relationships (and the world) in a fundamentally different way than stolas as a product of the differences in socioeconomic contexts in which they were raised."

2. BLITZ

oh, blitz. where to start? this is where i admit that there are a lot of similarities between the way blitz and i grew up, and a lot of similarities in the ways that we view relationships now (read: i may project a bit. apologies in advance).

from when he was young, blitz has learned that the only successful type of love is love that is transactional. he loved his mother, and she died in a fire he started. he loved fizz and barbie, and he ruined their lives. the only "successful" love he has experienced is love where he provides something (read: gets "used") and receives something in return. so, unless he can provide something of value to his partner, blitz prefers to keep it casual. in blitz's mind, people don't care about blitz, and people shouldn't care about blitz. loving blitz has always been a recipe for disaster, because in his perspective, if he can't provide something to his lover that offsets the destruction that he causes, then he's not worth it.

it's normal for blitz to feel used. it's normal for blitz to feel less-than, or unwanted, or unloved, and it hurts blitz less to believe that. sex is fun. he can "do sex", and he can do sex good, and maybe to him, that's all that he can do good. he certainly can't hold down a relationship. his employees only care about him because he provides a stable source of income. his daughter only cares about him because he gives her shelter. it's normal. blitz feeling hated is normal, and the normalcy brings him so much comfort that he purposefully pushes people away to maintain that awful, vicious cycle of a status quo. it's a self-fulfulling prophecy.

blitz's approach to stolas in the beginning of apology tour is his desperate bid to return to normal. stolas being so short and angry with him is almost comforting— blitz knows how anger feels. he knows how hate feels. stolas is just another person who finally, finally realized what blitz knew all along— love is something that isn't possible for blitz, because he always fucks it up (at least in his perspective). and if stolas lets blitz fuck him, lets blitz provide this service to him, then maybe, blitz can "earn his way to earth" (read: "earn" stolas's affection back). affection, to blitz, is something for him to work tirelessly and endlessly to receive— a sisyphean affair. he is not ever intended to actually receive it.

stolas doesn't recognize this. stolas doesn't even try. but in stolas's defense, blitz doesn't exactly make it easy. i may empathize with blitz, but i think i would also be a little less prone to empathy if the object of my affections mocked my feelings by brushing them off in favor of sex and then screaming "GAY" in my face when i refused.

the rest of blitz's apology tour is borne out of pettiness towards stolas, because in his eyes, stolas is the one who wronged him. stolas was the one who accepted the rules of engagement with blitz (i.e., a transactional relationship: the grimoire for a bit of fun, kinky sex). stolas is the one who has all the power. stolas is the one who can choose to ruin blitz. stolas is the one who ruined the good thing they had going.

except... blitz doesn't really believe that. deep down, subconsciously, blitz knows he loves stolas, and by being in love, he's done to stolas what he did to his mother, to fizz, to barbie: ruined his life. maybe, if blitz could seduce stolas and make their relationship transactional again, he could correct their course and save stolas the pain of believing that blitz is deserving of love. it's a trolley problem: pull the lever, and blitz is the only one who gets hurt. let the trolley continue, and stolas will inevitably get caught in the crossfire of loving blitz.

blitz can handle a little pain. he handled it when his mother died. he handled it when fizz hated him. he handled it when barbie left him. he handles it over and over again, being used as tool for sexual pleasure or physical violence. he earns his pain, just as he feels he must "earn" the grimoire. just as he feels he must "earn" the little tokens of stolas's affection.

as an aside: the grimoire is more than a symbol of blitz's livelihood. it's a physical representation of the stark difference in class between blitz and stolas, as well as a representation of the transactional nature of all of blitz's relationships, not just the one between him and stolas. it is one magical book among thousands that the goetias own— a veritable drop in the bucket of the immense power, wealth, and influence that the goetias, and by extension, stolas, wield. that same book which is inconsequential to stolas and the goetias is everything to blitz. without the grimoire, he loses his job and everything that comes with it, including (in blitz's transactional view of relationships) millie, moxxie, and even loona's companionship. but i digress.

it's been said before that there is nobody who belongs at the blitz hate party more than blitz himself, and it's true— there is nobody in hell who could hate blitz more than he hates himself. because as much as he might present himself as a little dumb, he's anything but. he knows what he's doing will destroy him. he knows if he continues to do what he's doing, he'll "die alone", which, in some ways, is what he fears more than anything. he even tells verosika that he "doesn't want to be like this forever", but he can't seem to stop himself. he doesn't know how to stop himself.

after all, he's right. everyone hates him. it's evident in the party they've thrown for him. and the worst part thing is: it's his fault, and he knows it. he knows he's hurt all of these people, and even though he plays at callousness, he can't quite hide his hurt that stolas in particular won't hear him out. he can't hide his hurt that stolas can't seem to understand where blitz is coming from. because blitz does try to talk to stolas in apology tour. he tries to tell stolas what he's feeling, and how he regrets how he's spoken to stolas, but stolas is too drunk and too upset to care (which, btw, not blaming stolas for that. if i were a drinker, i'd be right there beside him).

stolas, in this moment, focuses entirely on himself and the pain that blitz put him through (again, not blaming stolas for that), but it tells blitz that stolas really, really does not care about him anymore, if he ever did. and wasn't that what blitz wanted? isn't that what blitz deserves? so it's easy to let a bigger, taller, more handsome, more suave imp sweep stolas off his feet and out of blitz's life. the imp is, by his t-shirt's estimation, "better than blitzo", after all. and don't they say that to love someone is to let them go?

verosika's advice to blitz only cements this. stolas is moving on. stolas deserves better. and blitz? all blitz deserves is to be used, so can he really be mad that some better imp is giving stolas what blitz never could? and again, blitz has dealt with the people he loves hating him before. his father sold him for $5. his best friend hated him for years. his sister still does. at least with stolas, he got the asmodean crystal out of it, and he won't lose the only semblance of companionship he has left.

3 - SOCIOECONOMIC CONTEXT

i saw a post that said that fans are focusing too much on the class difference between stolas and blitz, and i couldn't disagree more. in fact, i'd say that we are not focusing enough on the class difference between stolas and blitz.

all of stolas's ignorance is magnified tenfold by his lack of understanding of how their class and race difference colors their relationship. all of blitz's self-hatred and self-worth issues are exacerbated one-hundredfold by these same class and race differences.

classism and racism go hand in hand, especially in america. in helluva boss (and especially in the beginning of the stolitz dynamic), there is an implication of racial fetishization. blitz, the "lower-class" poor imp, fulfills stolas (an "upper-class" wealthy elite)'s fantasies of being "ravaged" and "taken" in his own home. stolas canonically enjoys the rough treatment, enjoys the taboo feeling of having blitz fuck him. it's very evocative of how some white american women fetishize and fantasize about black men— a fetish that has its roots in white supremacy (and especially the enslavement and ongoing oppression of black people in america.)

that said, in the context of helluva boss, it is very clear that blitz is aware of his socioeconomic standing the implications thereof— more aware than even stolas, who has ostensibly been educated on the social and economic nuances of the realm he helps to rule. he tries to tell stolas about how this difference in class affects him and amplifies his already awful self-worth ("you're a prince. it's hard to believe you would want me. that anyone would want me"), but stolas is incapable of hearing him.

all this to say, blitz is not solely to blame for their current relationship. that isn't to say that blitz is blameless. in fact, blitz isn't the most emotionally mature either— most of what i have written about him are things that i doubt he consciously realizes about himself. but stolas's ignorance and lack of willingness to consider where blitz is coming from, both emotionally and socioeconomically, make up a huge part of why stolitz continues to miscommunicate.

anyways. yeah. viv was right. things sure did happen.

[romancearc]

You know what. While some of Colin's reaction was a bit too mean (for a romance focused show), I get it. He thinks whistledown HATESSS him.

Year 1 the scribe ruins his engagement while severely embarrassing him and his family. year 2 he stays under the radar by "focusing on himself" but all of his disdain comes back when he visits Marina again. At this point nobody thinks he still fancies Marina, but his anger comes from LW robbing any chances of a proper closure from him. And people's disinterest and apathy towards his caring and love and excitement exasperates his insecurities further. Also, Pen going no contact is the nail in the coffin for sure, especially because he doesn't know what caused her to ghost him.

So he puts on a mask, a fake personality. He decides to be a rake. He hates it, but he is IT. And he gets validation! Anthony cheers him for it. The girls are swooning(I wouldn't, it looks so fake, and I know that is the point but still)! He puts up these walls where he can express himself only within certain lines. This is very unlike himself. But this way, he gets to avoid the scrutiny of a petty gossip column.

He thinks the same strategy will work with getting his bestie back. It fails (goodnight mr bridgerton) and then somewhat works (him promising Pen to teach his tricks). And then comes another public call out.

At this point he is beyond done with giving LW any grace. He is actively hoping for her downfall. He hates that LW has only criticisms for him. If he's sweet he's naive, if he's suave he's a fake. He calls LW beastly for calling Pen unmarriagable. He still remembers how LW nearly ruined El and changed her permanently*. He is excited to see her identity be unfolded, so that he can witness her downfall in real life.

So when he finds out that PENELOPE. out of all people he could've thought is LW, he gets irrationally mad. This is the woman he loves, the woman he plans to worship for the rest of his life. And she, through his lens, never hesitates to publicly blast his character to hundreds in the ton.

His entrapment comment was mostly a pathetic way of getting back at her(still distasteful imo). I did not for a second think he wants to end the marriage. but he thinks LW thinks very lowly of him, and he has come to hate her for it. We get confirmation on this later but he is desperately separating his lover away from LW in his mind. Begging her really, to stop writing. Because if Pen really is LW, then she doesn't respect him at all. I wish we could've had more scenes where they communicated and cleared the air. This is what the season truly lacked.

He doesn't like that THE Lady Whistledown, famously known for tearing people down(including himself) read his writing. He cannot take Pen's compliments about his work at face value anymore because he remembers how cruel she has been to him.

He is able to marry Pen because he loves Pen and knows she loves him back, but ruins their wedding night when Pen gives him an ultimatum. That she will not sacrifice a part of herself for him. Ideally, this would at least make him accept that he cannot separate her two lives. But that leaves him with only one choice, to distance himself from her, at least till he figures himself out. Petty as fuck, but ok. Man needs time to process his feelings. Thank God it only took less than two weeks😭😭.

Now he refuses to spend time with her(this hurt the most). His hero Colin shenanigans aside, he keeps distance and puts up boundaries, because he still cannot accept Pen fully. Penelope has also accepted that fate for herself. She willingly travels in separate carriages and doesn't even urge him to share their bed.

However when he happens upon the letters, things finally start changing for the better. Y'all I was begging multiple Gods that he reads their letters and when he did I almost screamed. Colin finally understands that his heart had accepted Pen a long time back, LW and all. He loves her writing. He loves her hold over language. He loves how she can truly see someone without ever prodding too much. He loves her barbs. These are all qualities of LW as well.

When he realizes that he likes everything about Pen that makes her LW, he is able to trust her again. That the Marina expose was done because she felt powerless. That she loves him, but she saw through his fake rakish behaviour and couldn't stand his new self. Isn't that validating? He has been trying so hard to be someone he is not only for him to see that the woman he loves doesn't want him to change one bit for her. That she wants him as is?

Oh and also that beautiful conversation after Fran's wedding was so healing. For my grieving polin hungover heart I am trusting that they've already reconciled here. Sure, still not sharing rooms but finally seeing eye to eye. She doesn't require valiant savior acts to love him, she already in deep for him. She loves Colin. Something that he was insecure about this whole season.

I love Polin. The melodrama this season was a bit too much for my liking because I watch bridgerton for the romance and not the nuance but this conflict has made me respect Colin a lot more than I did in s2. I know he has been a hit or miss character for the audience and that is fine honestly. I hope to see more of them in the later seasons. I see how Saphne has been completely discarded and I'm scared for Polin's fate now. Penelope makes this show dude, I hope they aren't forgotten so fast.

TANGENT but i felt like adding this here: I have seen people call Pen selfish for not quitting her column which makes me roll my eyes because she was constantly compromising her comfort to accommodate everyone else. The final act isn't only her getting the cake and eating it too, she actively works for it. When Colin says the LW secret will always stand between them she LISTENS to him. Her plan isn't just catered towards her avoiding Cressida's wrath and saving her dream but it is also her trying to save her relationship. 'ok darling, you're saying my anonymous identity is ruining our relationship? fine. let's reveal myself.' She even offers a divorce not because she is choosing her job over him, but because she loves him enough to not make him feel trapped. I love her. Colin you better be a wife guy now. UGH!!!

[animebw]

Hey there! I know emotions are running high right now, and this episode really hit hard. But for some reason, I feel like this might actually be a better path for developing KumiRei's relationship and their character arcs.

As you so eloquently put it, Kumiko is both less and more serious about their love than Reina, which has always made me hesitant to fully ship them. Kumiko's acceptance that she would eventually have to let Reina go, while still believing their relationship will survive, has always bothered me. Reina is obviously head over heels for Kumiko, even considering (though I think she never would have actually done it and gone wherever her own prospects are the best - exactly what Kumiko expected of her) following her to a decent music-related college in Japan. Until now, Kumiko has seemed a bit too nonchalant (save for the concerned expression after the America revelation) about wanting a future together as much as Reina does.

As painful as this episode is, it finally shows in a way we’ve never seen before that Kumiko explicitly wants that too, and they are both deeply upset about potentially losing one another. It also beautifully illustrates Kumiko's growth as a character—she truly is Reina's equal now, not musically, but in their strength of character and core beliefs. This time, sticking to their convictions has hurt them, but it's also what they love about each other.

I had my doubts about KumiRei going canon (or as canon as KyoAni can get away with), but now I think that’s where we're headed. They need to separate their relationship from music because it has grown far beyond that, and this final blow might help with that. At least, that's what I'm hoping for.

This is so eloquently put, kudos. And for what it's worth, Kumiko losing the auditions is apparently a change from the source material- she actually wins in the original novels- so all bets on what to expect in the final episode are officially off. KyoAni's never been afraid to make massive changes in its adaptations, to take stories from what they were and make them into something new. They've done that several times with Eupho alone already.

Is the chance high?

Not really, if I'm being honest.

But after spending so many years convincing myself they'd never be brave enough to let it happen... suddenly I find myself hoping again.

I find myself sincerely, earnestly hoping that a miracle is possible.

[claudiablogger]

god truly the framing of claudia's death as this unavoidable tragedy boils my blood. it's in the episode title how the appearance of futility in resistance was carefully orchestrated and claudia herself says it's a stoning but I guess the narrative of the Black woman always meant to have been dead is better. my god. the horror is she never shouldve been dead she was murdered !!!! the horror is they conspired and plotted against her in a fury of bigotry on behalf of a white frenchman (their own) and the person who was supposed to protect her facilitated her downfall and death because she posed a threat to him. and because he wanted louis to himself. the same way lestat did. again, as the episode title spells out for us, armand could have prevented it !!!!! we see such and greater displays of power from him time and time again the whole point of the title is hes gaslighted louis into believing it so the reason he did it is preserved (he has louis all to himself). not a fan of the term media literacy but this is a didactic show. come on

besides that's not even what "dead from the beginning" means we need to start putting it on the high shelf until people can use it properly. it refers to a character whose very introduction or birth in the narrative is emblematic of their inevitable, eventual, cruel, and tragic death. claudia's death is predicted over and over again BY PPL WHO WISH FOR IT ! the same people who, when it suits them, comment on how well she's taken to vampiric life and how she transcends the tragedy of how she was made. (shes a prodigious killer; why you'd want to limit her is beyond comprehension. / imagine her in a body equal to her mind. etc etc) but her actions and outlook always contradict this declaration of doom. time and time again she's proven herself better suited for vampire life than louis, even--often what's said about her inability to take to it is to keep him doubting and dependent. undoubtedly claudia's story is a tragedy, but not because she was always going to fail as a vampire. it's the opposite; it's because she would have and did thrive. we're conflating her struggles with louis' here, the way the men in louis' life do on purpose

the way it's all misogynoir too: ppl cant see her as the multifaceted character she is or reconcile her victimhood with her agency and strength. its there w louis too but worse with her because shes always a pawn in men w more structural power than her abusing her and abusing that power when she outwits them to get to louis. so to act like this was always meant to happen to her. when an calculated intentional series of events maneuvered her to her death left her with only her love........not the oresteian tragedy ppl think it is. save it for daniel being significant due to armands self fulfilling prophetic jealousy. not claudia

[olivialau]

Shadow's Embrace Ch.1

Sukuna x Reader

Disclaimer:

This is a work of fanfiction based on the universe of "Jujutsu Kaisen," created by Gege Akutami. The original manga, anime, and characters belong to their respective owners and creators.

Notes:

This story unfolds in the Jujutsu world, set in a slightly altered universe where Sukuna inhabits his own vessel distinct from Itadori Yuji's body, making him a separate entity.

Summary:

Ryomen Sukuna, the King of Curses, becomes fascinated with a female sorcerer rich in potential but lacking control. Initially seizing her for his destructive plans, Sukuna aims to use her abilities through a binding vow. Yet, as he tries to dominate her, he finds himself intrigued by her strength and determination. Over time, his interest evolves from a strategic advantage to a deeper, personal connection.

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CHAPTER 1 - The Futility of Resistance

Sukuna had heard whispers in the shadows, rumors that stirred the depths of his domain—the existence of a powerful young sorcerer, a female with unrivaled potential, but little experience. It was said you had recently begun your studies at Jujutsu High, a place teeming with skilled Jujutsu Sorcerers.

“She must be clueless about what awaits her, poor thing,” Sukuna whispered to himself with a predatory glint in his crimson eyes. His plan was clear: to kidnap you, and bind you in a contract that would force you to follow his every order. With your abilities at his disposal, he would infiltrate the ranks of Jujutsu sorcerers, and wreak havoc. He would use you as a cover to facilitate his evil plans.

The King of Curses smirked to himself as he traversed the boundary between his domain and the mortal realm. Jujutsu High lay ahead, a beacon of light amidst the encroaching darkness.

With silent steps, Ryomen Sukuna ventured deeper into the heart of the school, his senses attuned to the faintest trace of your cursed energy. Tonight, he would find you. And when he did, nothing would stand in the way of his ambitions.

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After your first week at Jujutsu High, you lay sprawled across your dorm bed, exhaustion pulling at your every limb. Only a few months had passed since your cursed energy had suddenly manifested, growing rapidly at an alarming pace.

Until then, your life had been tediously ordinary—a normal family, normal friends, and a sense of boredom that gnawed at your spirit. You couldn’t shake the feeling that there had to be more to life than this. And as if your prayers had been heard, your life was suddenly thrown in a whole other direction.

Everything changed the day your best friend got caught up in a mysterious incident, her life abruptly ending. Grief-stricken, you began sensing dark presences lurking in the shadows, just beyond your perception. At first, it was merely an eerie feeling, an aura of sorts, but soon, shadows and movements turned into tangible threats. You convinced yourself it was just the trauma of losing your friend playing tricks on your mind, until the creatures became undeniable.

In moments of emotional turmoil, a strange power started surging within you, like an electric current.

Then one fateful day, while walking down a crowded street, you bumped into a tall man with vibrant white hair and darkened round sunglasses, his compelling blue eyes hidden behind them. The jolt at his touch was unlike anything you’d felt before. He looked at you with an expression of amused curiosity, as if he knew exactly what had happened to cause the jolt.

This man, Gojo, began bombarding you with questions that were weirdly specific, as if he already knew your story—the strange sightings, the sensations coursing through your body, the surges that came on when distressed.

Through him, you were introduced to the hidden world of curses and Jujutsu Sorcery. Despite your age of twenty-two, an anomaly among the typically younger students, Gojo ensured you were admitted to Jujutsu High, emphasizing how exceptional your acceptance was.

Now, as you lay in your dorm, the weight of this new reality pressed upon you. You closed your eyes, trying to calm your racing thoughts. The stark contrast between your own ignorance and the other students’ extensive knowledge of curses gnawed at you. They wielded their cursed energy with a measure of control and confidence, while you struggled to grasp even the basics.

But you were determined. Resolute in your desire to control and tame the energy within you, you held onto the hope that one day, you could prevent others from suffering the same fate as your dear friend.

Unbeknownst to you, your own fate was about to be in jeopordy, as Ryomen Sukuna, the King of Curses, was drawing closer.

You sighed deeply as you pulled the blanket up, hoping for a peaceful night’s rest. However, just as you begin to drift off, a sense of unease prickled at your senses. Your eyelids fluttered open, adrenaline flooding your veins.

A faint noise tickled your ears, barely audible yet unmistakably there. It seems to emanate from right outside your dorm room.

Your heart skipped a beat as you sat up, eyes fixated on the door. The handle rattling with increasing urgency. You prayed to yourself that someone must have mistaken your room as their own, but when the lock gives away with a sudden, sharp pang. It dawns on you that this was no simple mistake.

The door creaked open slowly, letting in a ray of light from the dimly lit hallway beyond. A surge of overwhelming energy washed over you, suffocating and disorienting. It felt as if the very air around you thickened, making each breath a struggle.

Shadows seem to dance along the walls, and a chill ran down your spine. The room felt charged with a malevolent aura, unlike anything you’ve encountered before. Fear built within you, yet alongside it, a resolute determination. With shaky breaths, you braced yourself.

A mysterious figure with a strong build walked in, his confident presence commanding the space. At first, it was hard to make out his features. But as the faint ray from the corridor landed upon him, you froze like a deer in headlights.

Though you weren’t fully familiar yet with the world of curses and jujutsu, you had heard plenty about this man in your first week. Countless horrifying stories, drawings in books, and anecdotes filled your mind.

Ryomen Sukuna, the King of Curses, stood before you, his eyes gleaming with malicious intent. For a moment, you hoped to awaken from a bad dream, but every fiber in you knew this danger was all too real.

“Well, well, what do we have here?” Sukuna murmured, his voice dripping with condescension as he regarded you. “A lost little lamb, far from the flock.”

He stepped closer, the air thickening with his oppressive cursed energy.

“I’ve heard rumors of your potential,” Sukuna continued, his gaze raking over you with a mixture of intrigue and disdain. “A rare gem, they say, amidst the sea of mediocrity that plagues this place.” He hissed.

He tilted his head, a cruel smile curling his lips. “Tell me, little sorcerer, do you have any idea of the power that courses through your veins?” His voice was a low, seductive purr, but the underlying threat was unmistakable.

Suddenly Sukuna’s hand shot out, his fingers wrapping around your throat with a tight grip. The pressure cut off your air supply, sending a jolt of panic through you. Your heart pounded as you wondered how Sukuna had managed to bypass all the security measures in the building.

“Do you feel it? The weight of my power pressing down on you?” he taunted, his voice laced with delight. “and this is only a fraction of what I can do.”

You struggled to draw a breath, your hands clawing desperately at his iron grip, but it was futile. Sukuna’s strength was beyond a mere human's strength.

His face inched closer, his hot breath caressing your cheek. “With the right… training, you could be of great use to me.” The implication in his words sent a shiver of dread down your spine. “So woman, what will it be? Will you join me willingly, or do you want to have some fun first?”

Despite the fear consuming you, a spark of defiance flickered within. You had barely managed to control your cursed energy in the past week, but now, with adrenaline coursing through your veins, it felt almost natural to conjure it up. Desperation fueled your actions as you channeled the energy through your hands and shot a powerful blast at Sukuna.

His eyes widened momentarily as he felt your cursed energy manifesting. A faint smirk played on his lips, as if he had been anticipating this very reaction.

With lightning-fast reflexes, he released his grip on your throat, effortlessly deflecting your blast of cursed energy back at you with a casual wave of his hand. The blast sent you reeling backwards, colliding with the wall behind you.

“Nice try brat,” Sukuna purred, his voice dripping with a sadistic pleasure as he stalked towards you. “But ultimately, futile.”

He loomed over you, his towering presence casting an ominous shadow. “You dare to strike at the King of Curses, huh?” His lips curled into a cruel smile.

Sukuna’s hand grasped your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze. “I admire your spirit,” he murmured, his touch surprisingly gentle. “But I wouldn’t make a mistake like that again if I were you.”

With his hand still firmly on your chin, you felt utterly disgusted by his display of power. You couldn’t help yourself from glaring back in anger.

Then his grip tightened, and you felt a flood of his cursed energy coursing through you, overwhelming your senses. “Now, submit to me.”

Surprised by your own unwavering defiance, you gathered your courage- and spit, and spat in his face. You knew you couldn’t win, so the least you could do was oppose him until your very last breath.

Sukuna’s eyes narrowed dangerously as your saliva hit his face, a low, rumbling growl escaping his lips. The air crackled with his rising fury, the walls of the room trembling under the weight of his immense cursed energy.

“Insolent fool,” he snarled, digging his nails into your jaw.

In a sudden, lightning-fast motion, Sukuna’s free hand shot out, grabbing your wrist in a vice-like grip. You felt your bones grinding together, the agony searing through your nerves.

“I graciously offered you a chance, you know?… To join me willingly,” he hissed, his face mere inches from yours, his hot breath caressing your skin. “But it seems you require a more… persuasive approach.”

With a swift, brutal twist, Sukuna snapped your wrist, the sickening crack echoing through the room. You cried out in agony, tears springing to your eyes.

He leaned in closer, his lips brushing against your ear. “You will learn to fear me, little sorcerer. And when you do, you will beg for my mercy.”

Sukuna watched with twisted satisfaction as the pain flickered across your face, your cries of anguish music to his ears. He relished the power he held over you, the ability to break your spirit with a mere flick of his wrist.

As you struggled against his grip, Sukuna’s eyes seemed to gaze into your soul. “Pathetic,” he spat, the contempt in his voice unmistakable. “Is this as far as your resolve goes?”

With a swift, brutal motion, he struck you hard on the side of your head, the impact sending you reeling into the darkness of unconsciousness.

Your limp body crumpled to the floor, a final testament to his overwhelming strength.

And the last thing you heard before slipping away completely was Sukuna’s voice, low and menacing. “When you wake up, you will realize the futility of resistance.”

---------------------------------------------------------

Thanks for reading! The following chapters are posted.

[aurora-daily]

Aurora: “We have this golden opportunity to truly understand each other beyond religions, cultures and how we look, but we choose to fuel our fear against each other”

An interview with AURORA for Hot Press by Riccardo Dwyer (June 24th, 2024)

There’s an ineffable air of Teutonic mysticism surrounding Aurora Aksnes – an Aurora-aura, if you will. Raised in a small municipality near Bergen, Norway, her elfish appearance, rare humour and all-round quirkiness have led some to cast the 27-year-old as a kind of Nordic folklore character turned chart clambering sensation.

Perhaps this hyperborean categorisation is deepened by her appearances on Frozen soundtracks and John Lewis Christmas ads, as well as a fan-made Wiki site which contains enough hyper-linked lore to make the creators of Skyrim blush.

It’s easy to see why Aurora’s attracted so many dedicated Warriors and Weirdos (her affectionate label for her fanbase). In addition to her one-of-a-kind comportment, she’s released three glorious, genre-meandering albums which artfully zero in on some of life’s biggest quandaries – from inner conflicts to questions about a deity.

Her fourth opus, as anyone shrewd enough to spot the mentions of ‘Blood’, ‘Skin’ and ‘Mind’ in the singles leading up to the project will know, suggests a thematic direction towards us, mere Homo Sapiens.

“With every album there’s one specific thing that really inspires and intrigues me,” Aurora acknowledges. “This time, it’s man’s relationship to man. It’s all about your relationship to your own organs, and how you listen to what they’re trying to tell you, especially the heart. I’ve been reading a lot about the history of anatomy and the abilities we give each organ, and how that varies depending on the era and country.”

The title of the LP is at once a statement and an enquiry – a cry for civility in a world seemingly devoid of compassion and a marker of the artist’s own anatomical reflections. It’s probably best to let Aurora explain all that good stuff though. So, then, What Happened To The Heart?

“That is the question,” she nods. “I’ve been thinking about that a lot. I’m very overwhelmed by the state of the world. We have this golden opportunity to truly understand each other beyond religions, cultures and how we look, but we choose to fuel our fear against each other. We’ve been given the chance to be connected more than ever, but we fail to connect in the right places.”

The golden opportunity for connection – the internet, and more specifically social media – is central to the rampant evaporation of love.

“When I was younger and the internet first came about, I remember trying to understand what it could mean for people,” says Aurora. “None of that happened. Porn and gaming happened instead. We haven’t really made it as far as we all might have expected.

“We see and hear each other, but we don’t feel each other with our hearts. We still let these heart-breaking things happen, we’re watching people in Palestine lose their lives for no reason. We should be on a path forward to a peaceful world, but it seems like we’re heading in the opposite direction.”

This, Aurora suggests, is a result of our human tendencies being exploited by the binary overlords.

“We talk into echo chambers in real life, because we surround ourselves with people who are similar to us, so we don’t often get challenged,” she reflects. “Then we have the internet, which is based on algorithms, so we end up in echo chambers there as well. It’s like the world doesn’t want us to learn from anyone else with a different opinion or to interact with people who oppose us, and that’s something that really scares me.”

UNITY AND LOVE

The issue of climate justice also permeates the record. The origins of What Happened To The Heart? are in fact rooted in environmentalism, after a call to change led Aurora to pose the record’s titular question.

“Indigenous leaders of the world joined together and wrote a letter, ‘We Are the Earth’, basically pleading with leaders of the mass-produced world to lead more with their hearts and less with their minds,” she explains. “The way we live is so heartless and cruel. We take whenever we can. And if we’re not forced to apologise or pay for it, we won’t.

“We will gladly let the people of the future pay for what we’re doing now. And we will gladly let someone far away pay for the clothes we wear, or the food we eat. We know that things are wrong, but we still just go along with it. That’s how the world is today. It’s a weird dynamic to live in as a human, because I don’t know what else I can say. It blows my mind to realise how deep our issues lie.”

Aurora is evidently passionate and well-informed. Does she see it as an artist’s responsibility to weigh in on issues of social justice?

“Well, scientists have tried to warn us about global warming for 50 years and nobody has listened,” she points out. “Leaders of the world don’t want to change their ways because it won’t benefit them. They want to have money now and to not have to think about the world later.

“Sadly, it’s come to the point that artists and musicians, as individuals who connect people, have to deliver the important messages. You have to reach out and appeal to the masses, and artists are the best at doing that – at engaging people and riling them up around unity and love, rather than fear and hatred.”

EIGHT BIG THEMES

She acknowledges her own role in what’s often a ‘mass-produced’ music industry.

“You can talk to companies who do things right, or to people who have a minimal carbon footprint,” she says, “but that’s not where your words are needed. It’s good when you’re part of an industry that has a lot to be better in. There’s more room for the things say to make a difference, instead of talking the same shit to people who know it already.”

What Happened To The Heart? holds up sonically too. It’s rife with romantic melodies, expansive synthscapes and arena-ready choruses, punctuated by Aurora’s distinct, soaring vocals – which have drawn comparisons to both Enya and Björk. However, Aurora finds it difficult to assess her own music.

“I don’t really see it when I’m in it,” she says. “I see it later, when I hear it. I don’t like listening to my own music. I would rather eat a baby.”

They must have some tasty infants in Norway, I laugh – the songs really do sound good.

“This album has a huge range,” she admits. “It’s been extremely fun to play around with, because I wanted it to symbolise both lyrically and sonically a process of pain – and the two paths you can choose, self-destruction or self-healing. With humans, it seems that pain often inspires more pain – hurt people hurt people.

“I see all of my music as being a really clear extension of me, and I think that’s really showing in the production. It starts really soft and spiritual, and then it ends on a really hard and human note. It’s going to be fun to sing live. I’m shitting myself with excitement.”

Using that phrase as a gauge of excitement rather than fear is indicative of Aurora’s uniqueness. She goes against the grain in most facets of her artistry, even imposing a Tarantino-style limit on her creative output. Strictly committed to releasing no more than eight albums, the decision tracks back to her early days as a musician.

“I started writing songs when I was about nine,” she says. “Songwriting was beginning to give me a new sense of meaning in life and made me feel better than anything else I had ever touched or let touch me, and I just had a moment thinking, ‘Oh my God, there’s so much I could write about. What do I want to say?’

“I remember taking it really seriously and writing down a map of all the things I want to say, and there were roughly eight big themes that I wanted to approach.

“First up was The Demons. The Warrior was chapter two and then chapter three was God. Now we’re at The Human, but yeah, there’s eight things and I’ve said four of them. It’s going well so far.”

[nalyra-dreaming]

I think we’ve gotta accept that they’re making all of the characters darker, Lestat included, and the fight/fall is an example of that. I’m just glad that they made it more understandable from Lestat’s perspective with the revisit while still not undermining Louis’ abuse and also having Lestat admit to his wrongdoing. With Louis, they’ve made it so that he was a much more active participant in Claudia’s turning and thus is very complicit in what happens to her. With Armand, he’s been tampering with Louis’ memory, manipulating Louis and downplaying his involvement for decades, which goes way beyond what he did in the books. There’s probably more additions that I’ve missed too and obviously there are dark moments in the books that haven’t happened yet that will also be shown I assume. Imo it’s just going to make the themes of love, contrition and forgiveness more fulfilling. Lestat has already shown a lot of remorse in the 1940s and we know it’ll be decades before he and Louis get back together so he has a lot of time for self reflection and becoming someone who is actually worthy of Louis. They’ve already planted the seeds for that and s3 will be developing Lestat’s backstory in the past while delving into his character development in the present I think. I have faith in the writers and it’ll be so satisfying when they pull it off tbh.

If and when they pull it off it will be very satisfying, yes.

It's just... taxing, while we're being stuck in the middle of it^^.

In a few years we'll look back and sigh with a bittersweet smile I bet *laughs*

[not-without-my-oreos]

Hey look, it’s me, back with another fic brought you by Being Gay.

Being Gay: Women. All women. Fuck.

Title: Familiar Encounter

Pairing: Cabenson (Olivia Benson x Alex Cabot)

Genre: Uh, Smut. Sorry.

Rating: M

Summary: Olivia and Alex have an arrangement.

Disclaimer: I don’t own these characters. Obviously.

Opener

There’s nothing quite like the feel of someone’s hand running down your body, their lips pressing to your neck, and that little whisper in your ear that makes your entire body shudder with excitement. There’s nothing like a breathless kiss or being pinned to a wall. That overwhelming feeling that washes over, the hand that grasps your throat. It’s all worth it just for that final climax.

Familiar Encounter

Alex: Well, my day has been awful. Want to grab a drink?

Olivia: I gotta work late. What happened?

Alex: Judge threw out the Hammond case. Fin is pissed with me, I just need to relax.

Olivia: Ah, shit, sorry Al. I won't be outta here until ten. Raincheck?

Alex: Sure, I'll see you tomorrow.

Alex sighed and threw her phone down on the coffee table. The blonde settled back on her fabric couch and looked out of the large window it was facing. Her eyes glanced at the New York City skyline, offices still being worked in, and apartments with the slight sign of life on a Thursday night. Alex sighed once more, her eyes feeling heavy from the day, but she wasn't tired. It was barely eight in the evening. Usually, she worked late, but after losing against an opponent she considered extremely inferior to her skill in the courtroom. Maybe she was having an off day? She woke up that morning feeling uneasy about the case, an unusual sensation for the great Alexandra Cabot of the District Attorney's Office. Alex was quite often feared by some defense attorneys. She has made a name for herself in the New York law scene and even intimidated the other prosecutors. It was a lonely life. Aside from scaring away anyone that came into contact, those who didn't fear her were cops and most of them didn't enjoy drinking with her, especially when she lost their case. The only person who gave her any form of friendship beyond the means of what she could do for them was Olivia Benson.

The two hated each other at first, Olivia didn't agree with Alex joining their team ten years ago, but she soon warmed to the new ADA. Alex enjoyed their Friday night ritual, going for a drink, dinner, and whatever else happened after. No one seemed to make her smile quite like Olivia Benson. She enjoyed those moments when she felt like she wasn't just an ADA. She was a friend. During her time in the programme, Alex felt lost being away from Olivia. She wanted nothing more than to pick up her phone and hear her voice but she was trapped in suburban Oklahoma. Oh, the tragedy. She only returned to her old life for a day before being whisked away once more. Away from everyone she knew, away from Olivia. When she was finally allowed to return to her normal life, this time for good, she didn't know how to approach Olivia… so, she didn't. She hid away behind a new job, a new apartment, and a new fiancé she didn't want. She was eventually placed back on sex crimes, not by her own choice. “If anyone can work with those detectives, it’s you.” Jack McCoy’s demands were evident. After Novak was suspended, SVU went through lawyer after, lawyer after lawyer. None of them seemed to stick around long enough to make a small drop in the large ocean those detectives sailed through. The detectives of the Manhattan SVU were different from other precincts. They had pride, courage, and genuine care for the victims. They had a moral need to do what was right and that often conflicted with ADAs who would rather do the bare minimum.

Alex pushed herself up from the couch, she pulled off her black blazer and tossed it on the coffee table before making her way into the adjoining kitchen. Alex wasn’t much of a chef she admitted in open court to setting fire to her kitchen back in the late 90s. Everyone Alex socialised with knew of her rich upbringing in Upstate New York, she was raised on a palate of lobster, steak, and perfectly cooked duck but she couldn’t stomach anything other than Kraft Mac’n’Cheese with butter, Cup Noodles (the good ones from Japan), and whatever takeout menu she could get her starving hands on. Once the Starbucks down the street opened, it was a game changer. Coffee whenever she wanted, and protein boxes she could take to work. Finally, she could improve her diet and step away from carbs, carbs, and more carbs, but the mere thought of kale made her gag. Alex didn’t have a selective palate… nor was she a picky eater, really, she just liked the foods that brought her comfort even if they came in a blue and yellow box.

Alex opened her fridge and pulled out the salad box from yesterday’s dinner.

“If I’m going to have carbs and cheese, I should probably have something green…” She muttered to herself as she walked over to the kitchen counter and placed down the plastic container.

Alex reached for the cupboard in front of her, pulled it open and retrieved one of the many Kraft boxes that sat on the shelf. As Alex opened the box, something hung in the air. The blonde swallowed hard as her breath became shallow. Her ears twitched as her eyes glanced to the left, but before she could turn she was pinned against the counter. A body pressed up against from behind. One arm around her waist, the other around her mouth. Alex’s eyes widened with fear as she panted against the hand. This was her worst nightmare, someone breaking into her apartment and taking control over her and she could do nothing about it. Alex feared the worst as her eyes scattered from left to right, her mind racing with the identity of her attacker. Could it be one of Velez’s followers seeking revenge after seven years? Could it be a disgruntled perp she put away years prior? Alex wanted to scream but she was frozen to the spot. The hand gripped her abdomen tighter and all she could do was squeeze her eyes shut. She could hear her heart racing in her ears as she felt whoever it was lean into her ear.

“Hands on the counter, Cabot.” The familiar softly spoke with a strong demanding tone behind it. A warm puff of breath against her ear and suddenly - everything changed for her.

Her eyes rolled back in her head as she felt those lips trail down her neck. She did as she was instructed. Any fear she had running through her veins was now replaced with a lustful need as a shockwave ran through her body and straight to her core. She could still feel those lips against her neck, her skin reacted with a gentle tingle forcing a moan to escape her lips muffled by the hand. Alex’s breath hitched as those lips planted a gentle kiss against her warm skin leaving goosebumps in its wake. Those lips travelled upward, grazing her skin softly until they reached her ear.

“Good girl. I’m going to take my hand away from your mouth and I’m going to blindfold you. Keep your hands on the counter.” She whispered into her ear. Alex shuddered and nodded.

The hand was removed. She didn’t say anything about talking.

“Jesus, fuck - Liv?” She asked, raising an eyebrow and still looking forward.

“Yeah.” She could hear the smirk on the detective’s lips.

“You could have said something in the text earlier? A little heads up so I didn’t think I was being home invaded.”

“You said you needed to relax… that’s usually the code for ‘fuck me, Liv, please.’”

Alex blushed a deep shade of crimson.

“Now, shut up and don’t break character again.” Olivia pressed herself back up behind the blonde as she dangled a silk scarf over her eyes.

Alex didn’t fight against Olivia as she wrapped the scarf around her eyes and tied it behind her head. She didn’t protest as the brunette’s hands snaked around her waist to the front of her blouse, untucking it from the pencil skirt. Alex fell back into the brunette’s embrace as she felt her lips against her shoulder, moving her hair out of the way so she could plant small kisses on her neck. Alex sighed softly, rolling her neck to the side to give the brunette more room. One hand played with the buttons that held her blouse closed, and the other ran down the side of the blonde’s body. She was in euphoria. Alex’s eyes fluttered closed behind the blindfold as every sense of her body was heightened. The sensation against her neck, she felt every puff of breath in between kisses, every goosebump in the wake of soft kisses, she could smell Olivia’s perfume, and she could hear her pulse as it quickened faster and faster. This was intoxicating.

They enjoyed playing these games, Olivia was always the more dominant one, though Alex didn’t mind all that much. They weren’t a couple, far from it, but they started these games before she was sent off to Witness Protection. They started with drinks every Friday night, just the two of them after everyone else had left. One night, Alex admitted how touch-starved she was, after not being with anyone since law school. Olivia took the opportunity to put forward a suggestion, which the blonde happily obliged. Later that night, Alex experienced one of the best climaxes of her life, all the while sitting on the detective’s face. She can remember gripping the headboard as her mind exploded and her body shook. It was mind blowing. Since that night - it was a weekly arrangement. Friday night. They were always the last two. Light flirting at the bar, followed by waking up together the next morning. After a short period, Alex realised she was slowly falling for the detective but she never told her how she felt. She knew the detective wasn’t the relationship kind of person and the last thing she wanted was for their encounters to end. She stayed quiet, has stayed quiet, all this time.

When she left for Africa, she was sure their encounters would end upon her return. It didn't take long for them to fall back into old habits. Things were easier now Elliot was gone. He wasn't always looking into Olivia's business, they didn't have to be so secretive anymore. Their weekly arrangements became an every other day appearance. Eventually, Alex gave Olivia a key to her apartment so she could just let herself in and she did, often. Whenever Olivia felt the mood, she would let herself into Alex's apartment whether it was for sex or just company. Alex knew she was playing a dangerous game when she let Olivia spend the night and she had to stop herself from telling her how she felt. Those feelings from all those years ago never went away, they just deepened. She wanted to find someone to break the cycle of sex and pining, but no one came close to Olivia. She dated interesting and kind people, some were fellow lawyers, others were doctors, detectives, and even a restaurant owner, but she couldn't get Olivia out of her mind no matter how much she tried. Olivia was the only person she wanted to spend an extended period of time with, she was the only one who could make her laugh, give her a pep-talk that lasted, and the confidence to put the bad guys away. She was falling seven years ago and she was sure she was done falling now.

Olivia's fingers opened Alex's blouse and displayed her torso to the night air. Olivia's lips pressed against the taller woman's shoulder as her fingers travelled over pale skin. Alex's muscles twitched under every touch as she rested her head on Olivia's shoulder softly whimpering. Olivia's hands finally reached Alex's breasts hidden away behind a red lace bra. She smiled against her skin as she kissed the blonde's cheek and cupped her with a gentle massage of her fingers. Alex arched her back to Olivia's fondling. Turning her head to capture the brunette's lips in a passionate kiss. Their first kiss of the night. Somehow the kiss tasted better when she was blindfolded. She could feel the moan from Olivia's lips. The gentle panting escaped her lips, desperate for the brunette not to pull away from their kiss. Olivia's hands squeezed softly. Her fingers grazed over Alex's risen nipple and an immediate response came from the blonde. She moaned again, the rough fabric of the bra and the sensation of Olivia's fingers. She wanted more. She could feel her core getting wetter and wetter, if she didn't have the panties or her tights on, she was sure her arousal would be making a mess on her thighs.

"Liv… please…" She whimpered begging for the release that was building up more and more.

Olivia smirked against her lips as a response, Alex knew she loved hearing her pleas for release. It made the brunette feel more powerful than she already was. Alex felt her skirt loosen as she heard the familiar sound of the zipper on the side fall. Olivia let go of the skirt and let it fall to the floor. Slowly, the brunette rolled Alex's tights down over her hips. Lowering her body along with them. She left a trail of kisses down Alex's back. The blonde moaned once more, every inch of her skin burned with every kiss. The anticipation grew more and more. A hum escaped as Olivia's lips pressed against Alex's left cheek just above her thigh. Alex stepped out of the skirt and let Olivia place the skirt and tights to the side before the brunette returned to where she wanted to be.

She gasped sharply as Olivia’s lips returned to her neck, her hand running down her torso. Alex turned once more to capture the brunette’s lips, even blindfolded, she could easily navigate. This kiss became deeper, and hunger grew, as Alex’s arousal only started to ache more. She wanted to feel the touch of the detective, she longed for the release that was building in her stomach. Finally, she felt Olivia’s fingers graze along the hem of her French panties. Her hips arched towards her hand as it dipped inside the delicate fabric. She broke the kiss only to moan into the dark apartment. She wanted to turn around and pull the brunette into her, feel their bodies together just like every other time they did this, but she was restrained to the countertop and there was nothing she could do about it.

Olivia ran her finger through Alex’s wet folds, the blonde moaned again resting her head back on Olivia’s shoulder. She could feel that familiar tightening in her core as her stomach twitched. She felt like she was already so close and Olivia hadn’t even started yet. Olivia was painfully slow as drew lazy circles around Alex’s bud. Alex hid her face in Olivia’s neck where her breathing became heavier and heavier. Her mind was a haze, muddy thoughts running, senses heightened. Alex groaned again as she felt the brunette’s finger run down her slit towards her opening. She was ready to beg once more, she couldn’t take much more of this playing until those words were whispered into her ear.

“Turn around, Cabot, but keep a hand on the counter.” She whispered to her, she could hear the smirk in her voice.

Alex followed the directions and turned around slowly, still with Olivia’s hand running through her folds. Alex’s hands gripped the counter to keep her steady as she felt the brunette push against her. She moaned at the skin-to-skin contact, she so badly wanted to run her hand down the detective’s chest and over her toned abdomen. She could still feel the fabric of Olivia’s open blouse brushing against her skin as Olivia leaned in and captured her lips. It was like one swift movement between the kiss and slowly slid in two of her fingers. Alex gasped against the brunette as she felt her walls tighten around her fingers welcoming her in further. She felt her knees become weak and her mouth become dry. Olivia’s lips crashed against those of the blonde in a passionate kiss pushing her further against the kitchen counter as she started with a steady rhythm. Lazily moving her fingers in and out of her lover, Alex desperately wanted to touch her but she could only grip the countertop tighter. Hitting that perfect spot, Alex’s back arches into Olivia, she knew she couldn’t hold out as the pressure began to grow more and more.

“Liv, please…” Her little whimpers echoed into the kitchen as their lips brushed, her breath hitched, and her body trembled.

As she felt herself reaching her point of climax, Olivia’s movements slowed. Instead, her lips traced along Alex’s jawline, as her freehand ran up and pulled the knot of the blindfold, letting it drop to the floor. Alex’s eyes fluttered open, darkened blue orbs stared into the pitch-black eyes of the detective. Olivia’s fingers traced along her jawline. A tender gesture, unusual of her lover to do such a thing. She swallowed hard as she pulled her bottom lip in between her teeth, her cheeks flushed, and her eyes stayed on her lover. Alex pressed her lips against Olivia’s fingers in a gentle kiss as they brushed across the bow of her top lip. Olivia smiled softly. Her eyes looked as if they were sparkling.

“You can touch me…” She whispered.

Alex wasted no time, her hands ran up her arms and then down her torso, over her toned abdomen, and pulled her closer. Olivia once again found that perfect spot, Alex’s eyes rolled back in her head as she dug her nails into Olivia’s torso. She tried to stifle her moan, however, the gentle hum of her voice escaped into the darkened apartment. She was so close and she knew that her time had come when she felt Olivia’s fingers curl inside of her. Alex’s body arched as her climax hit. Wave upon, wave, upon wave, crashed against her with every pulsation from her core. With sharp breaths, her eyes fell closed, and she couldn’t make a sound she held onto Olivia’s waist as her body convulsed. Coming down from her high she rested her head on her lover’s shoulder. Olivia smiled and pressed her lips to her temple as she slowly removed her fingers. Alex whimpered at the loss of contact, thankful the counter was there to support her weak legs.

Alex lifted her head, a lot more relaxed than earlier when she was sitting on her couch flicking through her phone. The long day of disappointment had long since vanished and all that was left was bliss. Alex sighed as she leaned back against the counter and opened her eyes looking into the deep brown orbs of the detective she had fallen for. As their foreheads came to rest, Alex wrapped her arms around Olivia’s shoulders with a warm smile. Everything felt so perfect, warm, and loving. She wanted so much more but she knew Olivia didn’t feel the same way and she wasn’t looking for a relationship. A sense of sadness crept over the lawyer as she tried to push herself away from Olivia and move from the counter, but she was pinned. Sandwiched between Olivia and the countertop.

“Liv… come on…” She mumbled as she tried to push past her again.

Olivia didn’t reply, she merely reached around Alex’s waist and pushed her up onto the countertop so they were at the perfect height to each other. She leaned in and captured her lips in a tender kiss. Alex felt her heart begin to race, this was different from any other kiss they have shared before. Butterflies fluttered in her stomach as she allowed herself to melt into the kiss and wrap her arms around Olivia’s neck. She leaned back resting her head against the cupboard. Her fingers laced through her long brown hair. The night lights from the streets of New York danced against their skin as they continued to share their loving kiss. Breaking for a moment to catch their breath, their lips merely brushed. Alex felt her heart as it began to swell in her chest. She loved this woman so much and she felt as if she couldn’t tell her. She didn’t want to lose what they had, yet the truth was consuming her. Alex pressed a soft kiss to Olivia’s lips. Her fingers danced along the olive-coloured skin of her cheek. She felt her smile against her lips causing a flutter in her chest.

“Liv…” She whispered.

“Hmm?” The brunette hummed in reply.

“I…” She can’t do it, she can’t change what she has.

At this moment, she has Olivia, she has her in her arms. She’s holding her, gazing into her eyes, but once she says those three words - it’ll end. Olivia will retreat and their meetings will be over. She couldn’t do it, she

“Alex?”

“Sorry, I-”

“Love you.”

Alex’s eyes widened as she leaned back from Olivia. Her eyes scanned the face of the woman in front of her, wondering if her ears truly heard what she said. A smile formed on her lips and the sparkle in her eyes, that’s when she realised what she said was true. Alex pulled Olivia back in for another kiss filled with passion and love, she let her walls crumble around her as she finally found the stability she had always longed for.

[lonelier-version-of-you]

Okay, I don't really know what to say about Doctor Who.

That's not necessarily a negative "I don't know what to say", because there's plenty I could compliment, I just really don't know what to say.

I suppose I'll start with: both Ncuti Gatwa and Millie Gibson are brilliant as ever!!

And other than that:

- The resolution of saving everyone by getting Sutekh to bring death to all the death... it might have bothered me if I didn't expect the resolution to all this to be a bit silly and contrived but I did, so whatever. And Ncuti Gatwa made it feel all very watchable.

- The whole "force sweeping and wrecking the universe that the Doctor is told is their fault" thing gave me a bit of deja vu of the Flux, but Fifteen and Thirteen's respective reactions were of course VERY different so it didn't feel too similar the way it could have done. And that moment when the Doctor's crying and Ruby and Mel just sit with him, I thought was really lovely.

- Kate dying and then un-dying. Typical day in the life and death and life again of a Jemma Redgrave character, really.

- I briefly thought Mel was actually a goner for a moment, though. I was like "surely they wouldn't... would they?". Really I'm glad they didn't because it would have been a waste of the marvellous Bonnie Langford. And she was marvellous. What an actress. They cannot give her enough to do.

- On that note, the Doctor riding a motorbike with Mel was great fun.

- I assumed Ruby would turn out to be the Specialest Person in the Universe with magic space lineage or something. I'm glad that didn't happen.

- I got way too emotional about Susan Triad. There's something about characters who were trained/conditioned/created purely to do horrible things finding a life beyond that against all odds, becoming their own being, that really gets to me and she fits that archetype very well.

- It was cool how the 'Remembered TARDIS' became a plot point. It was also cool to have the Doctor watching their past self on the TV. I love stuff like that. And Four's scarf popping up was cute.

- I'm very intrigued by who Mrs. Flood is (I feel like she's probably a Time Lord for some reason but IDK who) but also... I don't need context for Anita Dobson in a fancy white coat with an umbrella breaking the fourth wall to be absolutely ICONIC. Literally, I'm very tempted to have that as my icon. Maybe in a few weeks when it won't be a spoiler anymore... hm.

- I think we know we haven't seen the last of Ruby but I don't really remember. I don't tend to like companion leaving fakeouts, unfortunately. (Clara is the exception.) I'm a bit annoyed by having another one but I'll get over it.

I can't believe there's no new DW until December and then probably months after that for a proper series. Or rather, I can believe it but I'm sad about it. I'm excited for Varada Sethu to become a companion when we do get there though!

[quirinah]

ummmmmmm guys this dungeons looking a little dark here..........................ummmm..... hello??? guys??

[thegreatyin]

this nemesis ambition started out a little slow but I am getting closer to finding that bastard who killed my wife, and I’ll not rest a minute now that im far closer to on his trail

sorry got in character for a second

Anyways fun ambition so far very fucked up though

congratulations on joining the murder club anon!!!! depending on who you ask the name refers to either people who have murdered or people who have witnessed murder. usually both. actually extremely often both. it's a swell time you'll feel right at home (don't mind our collective skyglass knife collection in the back)