#But yeah basically a fluffy Au all around

[theglamorousferal]

Persephone's Binding Part 2

Hardcover/Anger Management ship Sacrificial Bride au

AO3 Prompt Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12

(Things get a bit angsty here for a bit, but don't worry, it gets back to some of the cracky-goodness!)

After allowing himself to relax for a bit and actually letting his muscles loosen for once, Jason rose from the bath and rinsed himself off under a piping hot and strong shower. He finished the rinse off with a flash of cold water to focus back up and made his way to the vanity where there was basic hotel amenities. He attempted to style his hair and after at least drying it, pulled on the fluffiest robe he has felt since he first moved into the manor all those years ago.

Fuck. The family. The Outlaws...

Jason put his face in both his hands and took a deep breath, then allowed his shoulders to slump as he dragged his hands from his face to his sides. He marched in a lazy manor over to the end of the large bed where he flopped face down. Surprisingly, it wasn't as fluffy as he was expecting and he silently thanked whatever force there was that he wouldn't have to resort to sleeping on the floor or a chair for the familiarity. Though, he turned his head to face the windows, that little reading nook looks like I could easily fall asleep there.

No, stop it. Do I remember the Dimensional Code for home?

Jason contemplated. On one hand, it could be useful, on the other, they could have an entirely different category system here. He spent the next however long trying to remember the dimensional code for his Earth and tracing the swirls of purples and greens out the large windows. A knock startled him.

"Jason? Are you decent?" He stood quickly and pulled the robe tighter together, not quite ready to show his autopsy scars to his soul-owner? A literal goddess? He wasn't quite sure what she was yet.

"Uh, yes, come in, I'm covered." He tried to stand casually next to the bed when he had just been sitting, his hands now in his pockets.

"Hi, so one of my aides figured one thing out about the ritual that is somewhat concerning and also something I probably also should have brought up. Mind if we sit at the window?" She strode in and settled herself with a pillow against the window and waited for him to do the same. Once he was settled, she hesitated for a moment before sighing and looking out the window to the haunting site outside.

"The Infinite Realms has another name, one coined from my Earth." She licked her lips before she spoke again. "It's also known as the Ghost Zone. As the dimension between dimensions, it is also where beings known as ghosts, the Restless Dead, Neverborn, Gods, and all sorts of other beings that thrive off a substance known as ectoplasm reside. As such, I am current Queen Regent of Ghosts." She let him think for a moment before turning to him. "That means I can tell when someone is death-touched." Jason froze. "I didn't mention it before because I know it's super personal, but then my aide figured out that the ritual only worked because of the fact you are and especially since you had spent time here-" She cut herself off as his eyes just bugged out larger with every word that spilled from her lips. "Sorry, I just, I'm death-touched too. I haven't died yet, but I have been around death magic, or radiation, or whatever it is, since before conception. I don't know exactly what you went through, but I know it was deeply traumatic. I can have my healers take a look at your soul and see if it's alright because it kinda radiates a bit how traumatic it was." She bit her lip with one hand raised near her chin.

Jason closed his eyes, taking a deep breath and clenching his jaw tight and blowing the air harshly out his nose. He fell back against the window, allowing his head to knock against the glass. It was warm, as though the sunlight was gently shining upon it. "Yeah." He croaked. "Yeah, I died." He said softer. "I was dead for roughly six months." He dipped his head forward to block his face with his bangs. "Crawled outta my own grave." He laughed bitterly. "Spent a while wandering, a while more in a coma." He swallowed tickly. "Got picked up by my dad's vindictive ex and trained for a while to be an assassin." He looked up at her, making eye contact. "She dunked me in this pit of magic shit, we call it a Lazarus pit in my dimension. It cures those near death and kills the healthy. Fixed me up the rest of the way, or at least the scars and issues I had pre-death. I got to keep these." He allowed the top of the robe to fall away, showing the tops of the large y-shaped scar that ran the length of his torso. She gasped, both hands coming to cover her mouth, tears began to form in her eyes. She reached out as if to touch them and stopped herself, her face turning determined.

"I, Jazmine Nightingale, High Queen Regent of the Infinite Realms, the Mediator, the Caretaker, and all those other titles." She waved her wrist. "Declare that I will help you however you deem necessary. Whether that be helping your soul, returning you to your dimension, breaking this binding, or whatever. You are currently bound to you, and as such that makes you my responsibilities." She paused in her speech for a moment, thinking. "I mean, you're already technically one of my subjects because I think you qualify as one of the Restless Dead, but we'll figure out your classification when we take you to a healer. For now, it has been a long day. I will have one of my aides come to get your measurements for some clothes, I'm sure we have some around here somewhere that should fit you at least for dinner. The aides can get any style you like and it can be made quickly by the seamstresses we have on staff." At his hesitation she added with a smile, "They work in supernatural means, they will not overwork themselves by making an entire wardrobe in a few hours."

She patted the cushion in front of her and stood. "I will meet you at dinner, it's not formal at all, don't worry about dressing fancy, I'm just still in this getup from 'official queen stuff'" she said with air quotes looking tired. "I'll see you in a bit Jason!"

"Yes, um, your majesty." He stood to bow, the robe making it a bit difficult."

"Just Jazz please, for the love of the Ancients." She said with a pained look on her face.

"Right, sorry," he stammered, straightening, "See you later, Jazz." She smiled softly before leaving him to himself. He smacked his hand to his face groaning at himself before flopping face-first into the bed again. "She's the ruler of the dead and she's so determined and nice, what the actual hell? She's so earnest, it's so cute!" he sat up leaning his elbow on his knee. "Okay, operation Romance Plot is go. She isn't put off by the fact you died, this is good, I can work with this. Okay, so castle, let's go with that aesthetic. I'm thinking let's go with a poet shirt and some black slacks for dinner tonight." He claps his hands in front of him, decision made.

As if summoned by his words, there was another knock at the door. A man with bright sky blue skin and a deep plum butler's uniform opened the door, a measuring tape casually thrown over his shoulders.

"Yes, hello good sir. What aesthetic are we thinking for this evening?" he said in a posh accent.

Jason clasped his hands together. "What should I call you? Would you possibly have a poet's shirt and a pair of black formal slacks for this evening?"

"You may call me Jeeves. Yes that Jeeves. I am the personification of the trope of the helpful butler, and as such my power set includes anything and everything that could help me complete the duties of head butler of the High Family's home. We absolutely do have that attire on hand, it would be but a moment for someone to fetch it for us. Now did you have any ideas about future attire?" Jeeves snapped his fingers and a skeleton manifested in a swirl of dust to obey his silent command to gather the requested clothing.

Jason paused for a moment, considering. "How does the Queen usually dress casually around the castle? I know she said she was from an Earth. I don't know where in the timeline her Earth is from and she mentioned that what she was wearing earlier was mostly for special occasions, so I don't want to look like an idiot." He explained.

"Very good sir, she typically dresses in either a less formal toga if she's to be seen anywhere near the public areas of the castle, her armor whilst sparring with her knights, the High Princes and Princess, and if she is only going between her room and study then her far less formal Earth clothing which is a long sleeved blouse and lightwash jeans, typical of the late 1990's and early 2000's."

Jason thought for a moment. He didn't know how long he would be stuck here, but decided that clothes enough to last a fortnight should work. For all he knew, time flowed differently between here and his home dimension. Decision made, he told the butler what he wanted. Measurements were taken, the skeleton arrived with the requested clothes and Jason was left to change into his clothes for the evening. He still is wearing his combat boots because he forgot to ask for a pair of shoes.

Once changed, he realized that he still probably had a bit before dinner and he walked over to one of the bookshelves browsing the titles. There were several classics that he recognized, his favorite, Pride and Prejudice, was there. There were a few as well with Jane Austen's name, but not titles he recognized. He decided to come back to those later and pulled what looked like a collection of fairy tales from the shelf then settled himself lounging in the window nook to read for the next few hours.

[euphorajeon]

in the sheets | jjk

— pairing: boxer!jk x f. reader

— genre: fluff | college!au, boxer!jk

— word count: 1.1k

— warnings: short-haired, chubby-cheeked, sleepy jk, they're crude ahahah, a bit teasing on jk's end because what is jk without teases (non sexual), basically nothing big it's just jk and oc being fluffy in the morning.

— summary: a sleepy jeongguk in the morning is very soft and whiny, a stark contrast to the usual annoying and full-of-tease jeongguk. (either way, you love him all the same.)

— author's note: i just miss boxer!gguk and what better opportunity to bring him back than this sleepy jk live hahaha. hope you enjoy! :)

masterlist | boxer!gguk masterlist

There’s a norm to mornings you spend at Jeongguk’s house after dating him, one involving his white blankets, his pillow that sometimes you both struggle to share, and his inked arm draped heavily around your waist. Most mornings see you both fighting to keep sleep away from your eyes and denying the warmth of the blankets to get ready for whatever you got planned that day, but on the mornings you have the luxury to stay a bit longer in bed, Jeongguk always makes the most of your time by pressing his lips to yours in slow kisses, pinning you further against the sheets. Often you find yourself panting under him after said slow kisses escalate into something more, his sweaty body on top of you not faring any better.

This morning, that norm is broken as you’re standing beside Jeongguk’s bed watching him hog the pillow and blankets to himself as he puts his arm around the bunched up blankets instead of your waist. His recently-cut hair sits like a nest on top of his head, stray strands curling into his eyelashes. It frames his face way differently compared to his long hair, letting you see the roundness of his cheek pressing into his pillow. His half-open eyes stare blearily at you, squinting to fight the sunlight peeking from behind his blinds.

“You haven’t slept, have you.” It’s not even a question anymore. “Your mom told me you were having a karaoke session and just stopped like thirty minutes ago.”

“I couldn’t sleeeep,” Jeongguk moans, pressing his face into the pillow. “Got tired after boxing, then I slept, woke up at two. Couldn’t fall back asleep so I just picked up the mic.” His voice is mufled by the pillow but somehow you understand him through experience and willpower. Drunk Jeongguk is way worse than sleepy Jeongguk. “What are you doing here at seven anyway?”

You climb into his bed to sit next to his lying down form, leaning against the headboard. “Mom kicked me out,” you sigh.

The way Jeongguk sits up quickly sends you into a fit of giggles, his alarmed eyes jumping around the features on your face in panic worsening it. “Kidding, kidding. Annoying Aunt is coming so mom sends me here to avoid her.” A big yawn interrupts your sentence. “Plus, your mom asked me to check on you and your karaoke-ing ass.”

“I told you I couldn’t sleep,” Jeongguk mumbles around a yawn as well, slumping back into the mattress upon knowing your mom isn’t evil. “Judging from your yawn, you couldn’t either?”

“No, I slept.” Another yawn. “At four.”

Jeongguk snorts. “Yeah, that’s hardly sleeping.” He lifts the blanket without even opening his eyes. “C’mere. Sleep with me.”

The silence you responds him with is obvious, which makes him chuckle while dropping the blanket back down. “Just sleep, babe, I don’t have the energy to fuck you right now.” He purses his lips in thought. “Although, if you want to fuck me, that can be arranged..”

“Jeon Jeongguk.” You swat at his shoulder weakly, having little to no energy either today to scold him your usual way. “Don’t tempt me. Having your dick hard while being sleepy is worse than being blue-balled.”

“Hm.. speaking from experience, are we?” Your boyfriend lets out a small grin. “You’re hot but I don’t think I can even get it up if I want to. I’m really beat.”

“Then you should’ve gone to sleep instead of singing your ass off at the crack of dawn,” you say without any real bite, fingers combing through his hair slowly. Jeongguk lets out a sigh, seemingly enjoying your touch on his scalp.

“Yeah, yeah. Now will you let me cuddle you or not?” he whines, taking your hand away from his hair to press his lips softly on your fingers. Sleepy Jeongguk is one soft and mushy Jeongguk indeed. “Cold without you here.”

“Tempting, but pass,” you say, letting him wedge your hand between his lips and pillow. It lets your fingers graze the smallest of his cheek and you poke it playfully with what tiny room you have to move your fingers. “I promised your mom I’ll eat her pancakes with her.”

Your poking results in an exaggerated pout of your boyfriend’s lips, which lets out the most petulant sound you’ve ever heard come out of this man. “So you choose mom over me.”

He’s petulant, but his puckered lips are cute and tempting all the same, so you don’t resist the urge to lean down and give him a kiss right on his pillowy lips. “Pancakes,” you say after, slowly pulling your hand from his grasp. “Later, Jeon. Go to sleep, I’ll come back after eating.”

Jeongguk lets out a sound between a whine and a hum from deep inside his chest, nuzzling his pillow and letting his hair get even messier on top of his head. This time, you have to fight yourself from reaching out to run your hand through his hair again, to slip the stray strands behind his ear. Instead, you slip off his bed to finally go downstairs to Mrs. Jeon and her awaiting pancakes, but you find yourself stay rooted in place watching the steady rise and fall of Jeongguk’s chest as he slowly slips into slumber.

It’s not every day that you have the opportunity to map his face with your eyes like this—because most of the time he’d wake up earlier than you—so you take your time tracing over his features, from the way his bangs are covering his eyebrows, the ends of it touching his eyelashes, to his big nose that sometimes get red around the bridge from his glasses, to his very round and pinchable cheek, made more prominent by his shorter hair. Your eyes land on the pair of his lips last, now no longer pulled into a pout as soft breaths come out of it. The pair of lips with the piercing that started it all, the thing that got you addicted to having your lips against his, the tiny piece of jewelry that stays cold even when his lips are warm after working out.

Jeon Jeongguk is beautiful.

Your eyes are still stuck on the metal ring when the plush flesh around it spreads into a grin. “You’re staring, aren’t you?”

Caught red-handed, and he doesn’t even need to open his eyes.

“Shut up.” But still, his grin is contagious as you find one creeping onto your face as well. You shake your head to yourself, unable to believe just how much you love this guy. “Go to sleep, Jeon.”

“Mhm. Love you, babe,” he mumbles, then adds: “enjoy the pancakes.”

A chuckle bubbles up from your chest, finally getting your hand on the door to step out.

“Love you too. Sleep tight, baby.”

a/n: i hope you enjoyed this little drabble of sleepy jeongguk~ any feedback here would be very appreciated :) thank you for reading!

[cinnamostar]

blind date

pairing : changbin x gn!reader

summary : when you’re set up on a blind date and it turns out to be your ex boyfriend from two years ago

wc : 1.6k

cw : nonidol!au, they’re exes your honor, fluffy, cutesy, not proof read that much idk what else

a/n : wrote this on my phone again so sorry for any mistakes! i don’t really know how to feeeel abt this fic, not my best work but i hope you like it!

you let out a nervous sigh as you enter the restaurant, a cold shiver traveling down your spine as the hostess leads you to your table, one your friends reserved on your behalf. you were starting to regret agreeing to this blind date your friends, hyunjin and felix, set you up on, but they were so insistent on it and said they found the ‘perfect’ match for you. you weren’t sure if you could trust them that much, but you knew at the very least, whoever it was wouldn’t be some creep like your other unfortunate dates.

hyunjin and felix were some of your best friends, ones you made in the last two years since you moved to the city due to a new position you got in your company. you met them by chance through a few coworkers, and since then, the three of you have been inseparable. they were incredibly supportive people, but they were tired of hearing you complain about shitty dates every weekend, so they decided to take matters in their own hands, stating they know this really cool guy through some other friends who was ‘totally’ your type. and apparently this new guy just moved to the city a few months ago too, so you would be the perfect tour guide for him too.

regardless of your nerves, you decide to put your trust in your friends as you patiently wait for this mystery man to arrive. you were curious to know what those two boys believed your type was and what made them so hellbent on making you go on this date, but perhaps curiosity killed the cat.

“hey, sorry im late!” a voice you were all too familiar with rings in your ears, the man before you rushing into his seat across from you with an apologetic smile as your mouth hangs open in utter shock and surprise, goosebumps making themselves known all over your body.

once he sits down, he looks up to meet your flabbergasted expression, the smile on his face falling once the realization hits him. his faces pales, almost as if he just saw a ghost appear right before his very eyes.

“changbin?” you ask incredulously, still not able to accept the ridiculousness of the situation.

“y/n?!” he mirrors your tone, except he was far more boisterous than you, causing a few heads to turn as he flashes a sheepish and apologetic grin to the other patrons around you two.

“i… uh, you’re my blind date?” he questions in a lower volume with raised eyebrows.

you sigh, an astounded chuckle escaping you, “i guess so…”

“i see… since when did you move here?”

“uhm, a little bit over two years ago. i ended up taking that promotion my company offered me,” you respond, a hint of anxiousness trembling through your words.

“oh, so, basically after we broke up..?”

“mhm,” you hum in confirmation, your body feeling tense due to the awkwardness that hung in the air between you two. “felix and hyunjin told me you just moved here, right?”

changbin nods, “yeah, one of my old friends needed a roommate and i just kinda wanted a fresh start, so i took my chances. how do you know hyunjin and felix?”

“coworkers,” you reply shortly, not really sure what to do in this situation.

“oh, cool! they’re old high school friends of mine, we only reconnected recently,” he smiles gently, biting his lips due to his nervousness, “i’m sorry if this is awkward.”

“ah, no, it’s okay. it’s no one’s fault, this is just some crazy coincidence,” you reassure him, “we don’t have to go through with the rest of the date, it’s okay to end it he-“

“no, no!” he interrupts, a dusting of pink appearing on his cheeks, “if you’re okay with it, we can just use this to catch up, no? it’s been awhile since we last spoke.”

you let out an uncertain sigh, “i’m fine with it, it’s just that we really didn’t end on the greatest of terms, did we?”

changbin’s face grimaces as he reflects back on the last months of your relationship, ones that were filled with constant fighting and disagreements over the littlest of things, which ultimately led to a very over dramatic break up since you both had become sick of each other over time. “no, definitely not,” he chuckles, “but we can catch up like old friends, no? unless, you wanna miss out on a lovely time with me, then that’s your decision,” he teases, the old changbin you once fell in love with slowly peaking through.

you roll your eyes playfully, “right, it would be a shame if i missed out on something like that,” a smile breaks out onto your face, a sudden wave of butterflies and shyness overtaking you. “sure, let’s catch up. i don’t mind.”

“great,” he clasps his hand almost as if he was celebrating this small victory, an embarrassed smile taking over his features, “well, i guess hyunjin and felix weren’t lying when they said this ‘mystery date,’” he lifts his hands to do air quotes, “would be my ideal type.”

you shake your head, laughing at his statement, “right, they weren’t wrong at all. maybe they were a little too spot on.”

somehow, those two hit the nail on the head and somehow paired up two former lovers through some miraculous twist of fate. there was no denying that your heart still had room for changbin, a piece of it feeling empty since your relationship with him ended. at the end of it, you had chalked it up to right person, but bad timing, as each of you were far too engrossed in each other’s career goals that inevitably took time away from the other. it wasn’t the right set of circumstances for either of you, as nether of you were at a stage of life where you could nourish a healthy relationship. he was once the person you imagined to spend the rest of your life with, but at that time, you thought if you weren’t able to bear hardships with him, then maybe he wasn’t meant to be that person. it was easier to accept you two were never meant to be, but your heart knew better than that. your heart knew he was the one, but that life just cruelly got in the way of your relationship with him.

eventually, the waiter came around to take down your orders, briefly interrupting the flow of conversation you and changbin were having. in some strange way, talking to changbin against was incredibly refreshing, as you missed the sense of safety and familiarity he brought with him. he was still the same sweet and endearing changbin you once fell in love with all those years ago, and maybe those feelings of love never truly left your heart as each time he would giggle, your heart would thump out your chest. you found yourself having to resist the natural urge to hold his hand, or to reach over and pinch his cheeks like you use to do back when you were together.

you missed this, and you missed changbin more than you could’ve ever imagined. his very appearance was enough to rekindle old flames of affection you once held for him, ones you never thought you’d be able to experience again. you both were enjoying every moment together, laughing and poking fun at each other as if nothing had ever changed, and before you knew it, two hours had gone by in the blink of an eye.

changbin insisted on walking you to your car, matter-of-factly informing you it’s what chivalrous men like himself do, which sent you into a small fit of giggles.

a gentle breeze bellows through you both, a comfortable silence filling the air, the awkwardness from earlier no longer to be found. you look up to the night sky, taking a chance to admire the full moon that glistens above you.

“you know, whenever i look at the moon, i still think of you,” changbin confesses in a hushed whisper, a longing look in his eyes as if he was looking off into some distant memory. you turn to him with a quizzical expression, urging him to go on. “you use to always tell me to look how pretty the moon was nearly every night. even if we weren’t together, you would text me to go outside and look at it,” he reminisced fondly.

“you always looked too,” you smile.

“honestly, i didn’t really get it at first,” he laughs, “but i loved you and it always made you happy whenever we looked at it together, so i made sure to look at it every night. even if we were fighting and weren’t with each other. even now, i still look up and think of you.”

your face grows hot as his words fluster you, the unexpected vulnerability catching you off guard, “thank you,” you respond gently, “for doing that for me. it always made me feel very loved.”

“i still do it. i think part of me will always love you no matter what.”

your breath hitches, your eyes widening as he looks away bashfully, not expecting or planning for those words to ever leave his mind. you let out a soft exhale through your nose, a shaken smile taking over your features, “i feel the same way too.”

quietness returns, neither of you sure how to continue the conversation as you reach your car, “well, this is me,” you break the silence, pointing to the car next to you, “thank you for today, it was… fun. i had a lot of fun.”

he nods, “me too,” taking in a deep breath, “do you… do you want to do this sometime again?” he asks meekly, fearing your response.

“yeah, i’d really like that, changbin.”

“okay, great. it’s… it’s a date?”

“it’s a date.”

[bambisnc]

he's the one that's livin' in my system baby! [02]

pairing : sungchan x reader genre : fluffy roommates au <3 lil angst bc reader is really out here questioning their whole existence (js like me fr) cw/tw : sungchan spills coffeee + reader is freaking out a bit bc of feelings tm + minor swearing + use of caps wc : 1k !!!!!!!!!!!!! everyone cheer and clap for me !!!!!!!!!!!!!

'RING!!!'

you sit up at your desk with a start, head hitting the lamp that you had so thoughtfully adjusted to be right above earlier in the evening. as you check the alarm clock, it's.. 2.59 a.m. already?! shit.. the last you remembered it was barely 10.00 p.m. and you had just gotten ready for a "super intense cram session", to be able get at least a little ahead in preparations for your finals.

that totally worked out well huh?

as your still sluggish mind slowly catches up, you notice a shawl wrapped over your shoulders.. and that candle you'd lit had been blown out as well. hmm.

your suspicions are easily confirmed when you notice a little yellow piece of paper stuck to the wall with a simple "you got this ^^ ♡" on it.

before you're fully able to let yourself swoon at the thoughtfulness of your roommate - it would honestly not be an overstatement when you question how much of a saint you must've been in your past life to be graced with a roommate like him - you hear a concerning clatter from the kitchen which makes you immediately rush towards the source of the sound.

and there stands sungchan, scrambling around the drawers looking for something.. the puddle of steaming brown liquid, coffee probably, indicates that his search is most likely for a dishcloth.

you move up behind his now bent figure as he rummages through the lower drawers, as carefully as you can to pull out one and dangle it in front of him teasingly, "looking for something~?"

"i could've sworn that was not there before?? dude are you sure you're not some kind of sorceress in disguise looking to prey on pretty boys like me?" your close proximity doesn't seem to affect him in the slightest; you however very much are affected. which obviously means you'll yet again hide behind a safe fool proof technique : a teasing remark.

"pfft- is that the best you could come up with? rather basic, no? you need to up your game seriously - when i first moved in, didn't you accuse me of being an evil horticulturist because i got you flowers?"

"hey no you see that was totally valid and besides the jury is still considering that possibility"

"the jury?"

"mhm, the people who said they'll get back to me on r/horticulture."

you have to laugh at this but as you accept your defeat you flick sungchan's forehead slightly, and roll your eyes at his exaggerated whine.

the dishcloth in your hand suddenly brings you back to earth, you know, as compared to how rather over the moon you feel in his company, "wait catch me up on what happened here?"

"ah.. i was making you coffee. i don't support caffeine at uh 3 am usually but i know you really wanted to get done with some of those worksheets of yours so.."

there he goes being all thoughtful again. god sometimes you really don't even know how to form coherent replies when he shows his care for you so, so unabashedly.

"right yeah.. i appreciate that. but you really don't have to sungchan-"

he doesn’t have to. doesn’t have to make you coffee, doesn’t have to stay up for company when you’re pulling all-nighters, doesn’t have to cuddle with you during your pirated show binges, doesn’t have to hold your hand during late night grocery store runs, doesn’t have to share his mint-choco chip ice-cream, his favorite, with you when your spicy ramen starts getting a little too spicy, doesn’t have to comfort you when everything, everyone gets too overwhelming.

“i know. i’m not doing this because i have to - i want to do this for you… is there a problem with that?”

yes, you want to say, yes there is. he’s making you feel emotions you’ve only ever read about in webtoons and fanfictions, and you’re scared of that. you’re terrified of that. “feelings” never lead to a good outcome unless they’re overly romanticized in various media; and this is definitely not a romance novel; nor is this a kdrama. “feelings” lead to vulnerability, to rawness, to your heart being completely exposed, because it’s undeniable that the defenses you’ve worked to set up around it all your life will break down in a single instance, if he asked it of you. you know that.

“..no. of course not.”

sungchan’s face lights up with one of his trademark smiles then, as he directs you back to your room assuring you that he’ll be “right there with your coffee madam <3”

you’re unwilling to leave but you’re also unwilling to stay. you make your way to your desk, mind still a jumble of complicated thoughts, all revolving around him. it’s genuinely shocking how, despite having been in your life for such a short period of time, he’s somehow wedged himself completely and truly in your mind and heart.

-

“what’s on your mind hmm?” you find yourself in a similar position to merely 7 minutes ago in the kitchen, except this time it’s him with his arms moving around you to place your coffee mug on the table, diligent in taking care to avoid your laptop and notebooks.

“nothing much,” another safe, noncommittal response to hide behind, “feel kinda sleepy, still.”

“well, caffeine to the rescue!! but i would definitely suggest getting a few hours of rest.” he still hasn’t moved, his arms now resting on the wood, as he slightly tilts his head to look at you.

for once you decide to let yourself bask in the safety and comfort he exudes, overthinking and complications can, with all due respect, fuck themselves. “thank you, sungchan.” you’re unable to add in the ‘for everything’ so you can only hope he understands. you reach forward for the coffee, nose wrinkling slightly at noticing how hot it is.

and then. he leans in slightly till you can see your reflection in his warm, mocha-coloured eyes and inside you it’s as if 2 separate beings are desperately fighting for attention; one adamant on backing away as far as possible because it’s safe but the other yearning to pull him even closer. both beings are unfortunately unable to come to a conclusion, forcing you to rigidly stay fixed, not unlike a statue.

his voice is barely above a whisper when he goes, with all the devotion and affection you’d imagined in the gazes of every fictional crush you’ve ever had, “you drool when you sleep. it’s really cute.”

a gentle kiss to the tip of your nose and then he’s gone with some sort of a pleasantry but you’d be damned if you could remember even a word of it.

you blink. once, twice.

change of plans, then : instead of studying, you might need to pull out your softest, most sound absorbent pillow and scream into it, “jung sungchan. fuck. you.”

old notes : somewhat of a prequel to the other one? idk it's in the same univ u can fit in the pieces wherever u like also head empty worrying about exams also. sumchango love dive. ty for ur consideration . new notes : its a series now !11!!!! + [series m.list] [m.list]

[weeeeeekly]

quarter life crisis – ot5 tomorrow x together x afab!reader

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blurb !!! Reincarnation can bring soulmates together despite their time apart. Being a huge fan of TOMORROW X TOGETHER helped you get through the struggles of entering early adulthood. You would thank them personally if you ever could but when you possibly get the chance it’s more than what you could ever hope for.

info !!! txt are still idols, reincarnation au, soulmates au, polyamory, throuple²… they’ll all eventually date each other, mc has mental health struggles, universe assigned lactose intolerance, team no kids, glasses wearer, lives in the middle of fuck nowhere but still a city (just go with it), pet names used are “our love” & princess, & not edited.

wc: 1.8k

WARNINGS !!! NSFW, MDNI, 18+, extremely self-indulgent, soft yandere!txt, mentions of mental health & self-harm (nothing graphic) for entire series

author’s note !!! This is fiction!!! this is made up!!! I do not condone breaking in, stalking, and other ulterior motives to get close to someone you are romantically interested in.

why are there not more ot5!txt x fem/afab or gender-neutral reader… mandatory note that i do not think txt act like this in real life. I also cannot come up with a blurb for the life of me, so please peep the info tags.

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CHAPTER TWO

The rest of the night consisted of tossing and turning due to the news. Not only were your legs restless but so was your mind. As it approaches the early hours of 3 AM, you truly do think you’re losing it as you swear you hear Huening Kai’s laugh through the walls. The laughing stops once you put your ear against the shared wall, you huff as you step down from the chair. The sound of the front door opening startles you to fall off the chair.

“What are you doing up?”

You look up from the floor to your roommate looking concerned at you.

“Thought I heard something, but it’s just my mind playing tricks on me.”

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After finally getting 2 hours of sleep, which was basically a nap, you thought a quick workout would help wake yourself up. It had been a while since you worked out before work but since you had a restless night hopefully walking on the treadmill will fix something.

You wish your roommate a good night as they go to bed to work the night shift again. As you’re locking the door, the neighbor’s door opens, and you’re greeted by the sight of Taehyun. Not just any Taehyun but just-woke-up-with-fluffy-hair-and-no-makeup Taehyun.

Oh, you were in trouble.

He waved at you as you will yourself to not embarrass yourself. You flash him a polite smile as you turn to walk towards the elevator when you hear him call out “wait up”. You pause as you turn around to see him walk up to you.

“Are you going to the gym too?”

You nod as you stare at his beautiful face. You’re surprised you haven’t started crying or shaking out of nervousness/excitedness, but you were running on 2 hours of sleep, half of an iced matcha latte, and pure adrenaline.

“Yeah, are going to box?”

Taehyun raises an eyebrow at you, so you immediately scramble for an explanation, “The gym here has expensive boxing equipment…”

“Oh, really?”

Taehyun smiles at you with his beautiful Taehyun smile and sparkly eyes that you feel your calm demeanor slipping away, “Oh wow would you look at the time! I got to go to work!”

“You have work at,” Taehyun checks his watch. “5:30 AM?”

“Yeah? I mean yeah. So, I’ll just–” You flash a quick smile and immediately turn around to head to the stairwell.

Taehyun stands where you left him wondering why you were in a hurry to get away from him, but the realization hits him as he rushes back to the shared apartment. He flings the door open to his members falling backwards from leaning against the door to eavesdrop.

“Hyung, the door is made of great wood!”

“You’re right!”

“Our love is a MOA.”

Yeonjun and Beomgyu shoot up from the floor as they talk over each other to ask questions to Taehyun about their soulmate. Soobin stays on the floor as a loopy smile graces his features as he comes up with baking ideas. Kai paces back and forth while on his phone, looking up date ideas nearby.

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“I saw the news.”

Your head whips around to see your boss looking at you sadly with a box of cookies. You shake your head as she approaches you to give you a hug. You freeze as you accept the hug as you stare in shock at the rest of coworkers standing behind her with a sign that says, “Sending Our Condolences”.

“What is happening?”

Your coworker that is closest in age to you speaks up, “Your favorite group.”

“This is really sweet and confusing, but they’re not like One Direction, they’ll be back.”

Everyone just sends you an even sadder look than your boss did as they pile the pity gifts into your arms. You stand silent after they head back to their offices to start the day. Your mind can’t move on from the thought that what if TXT doesn’t come back.

The thought looms over your head of what you would do if TXT aren’t coming back. If this is them silently disbanding. The thought spirals you so much that your heart feels like it’s going to burst out of your chest and tears are threatening to stream down your face. Before finding some solace in the farthest restroom from your desk, you quickly place the pity pile of gifts on your desk.

You have a legitimate reason to not be working on another massive spreadsheet and stare at a bunch of numbers at this very second. You are having a mental breakdown of sorts.

You keep your head lowered as you walk past offices down the hallways to get to your favorite secluded bathroom, nothing special to the average person but to you the pale-yellow walls with knock off van Gogh paintings meant everything to you. This was the last restroom in the building to not yet be demolished and renovated into an ugly, modern look, destroying any remnants of the past.

The version of yourself in the mirror is a sad one as red-rimmed eyes stare back behind your tear-stained glasses.

Fuck.

And suddenly, you feel like you’re 18 again. Back to winter break of senior year, extremely depressed due to the way school was going. Your grades were barely passing and having to keep studying to get any scholarships for college. Pushing all your friends away, crying in the bathroom, praying to any higher power in the universe to not let anyone walk by to hear or see your current state. Clutching your shirt with shaky hands as every negative thought is screaming inside your head.

The only difference is that you can’t go home and lock yourself in the bathroom in the early hours of the night to self-harm.

There’s only so much you can do to calm yourself down inside the tiny bathroom with two stalls, including the accessible stall, and sink counter. Pacing back and forth while counting your steps isn’t slowing your breathing and every time you look in the mirror you cry harder.

The guys sit around the new table and matching chairs they bought earlier after you left for work. Taehyun looks up from eating the bento box they ordered. Soobin tilts his head at his member’s weird reaction until they all sense it.

“Something’s… wrong and I think it’s our love.”

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The rest of your shift passed painstakingly slowly from your sluggish movements. It also didn’t help that your vision was blurred by the constant presence of tears threatening to fall.

The second the clock hit 4 PM, you shut the desktop off and slung your bag over your shoulder to rush out the building. You don’t remember driving home as your body went on autopilot, but next thing you know you’re in the elevator on the way up to your apartment.

The sad walk to your apartment door would have been like any other if it weren’t for your neighbor’s door opening and five heads poking out to jumpscare you.

You let out a shriek as the metal water bottle in your dominant hand is ready to be a makeshift weapon as Beomgyu and Taehyun let out matching shrieks.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?”

The harsh whisper leaves your mouth as you bend down to pick up your belongings that ended up on the floor from the startle. Soobin beats you to it as he hands you your bag and obnoxious keychain of your favorite childhood character that holds your keys. You thank him as his ears turn red from making physical contact with you.

You’re unlocking your door as the other four watch you with their undivided attention and the feeling makes you pause, “Wait…”

You slowly turn your head to look at them – Yeonjun smirking at you while trying to act cool by leaning against the doorframe, Soobin hiding behind the doorframe while covering his ears, Beomgyu smiling so hard that you’re afraid he might crack a tooth, Taehyun staring at you with his beautiful boba eyes like you offered the universe to him, and Kai giggling at your comically confused expression.

“We never introduced ourselves, but we’re your new neighbors! I’m Daniel, by the way.”

“Daniel” extends out a shaky hand towards you. You accept the handshake and make sure to firmly shake his hand while making direct eye contact which causes Yeonjun to lose his cool and keep sending out looks of “help” to Beomgyu.

Beomgyu takes the hint and steps in, “I’m Ben.”

“Hi Ben. What’s that short for? Benjamin, Benward, Bennet, Bennet with 2 t’s and 2 e’s, Benedict?”

You continue listing names that could possibly use the nickname while keeping Yeonjun’s hand in a death grip as Beomgyu grows increasingly uncomfortable. You turn your attention to Taehyun who just mumbles “Terry” and Kai is busy trying to coax Soobin back inside the apartment.

“Drop the act. I don’t know what’s going on, so you all are going to explain to me why you’re here.”

Finally dropping Yeonjun’s hand, he lets out a sigh of relief as the rest of TXT go back inside the neighboring apartment as you follow behind them. Kai holds the door open for you as you mumble a “thank you” and hear him close it behind you. You follow the guys and take your shoes off to wear an extra pair of indoor slippers that are conveniently in your size.

You cross your arms as your eyes narrow, “Okay, spill.”

Yeonjun and Taehyun, the members with the most confidence in their English, jump at the chance to explain the story their protocol team came up with about how they’re here to film content for In the Soop: Together. Your eyes switch every few seconds from one to the other as they speak over each other, virtually making the story unintelligible.

A single hand raise from you quiets them both as you speak, “Let me make sure I’m getting this right. TXT as in Tomorrow By Together are in my random ass city in my random ass state that no one famous ever comes to – not even for concerts – but one of the biggest musical acts from South Korea is here?”

Kai’s head tilts, “You know Tubatu?”

Your eyes widen as you suddenly turn your head to stare at the fire alarm on the ceiling, “I never said that.”

“MOA!”

Yeonjun opens his arms wide for a hug as you’re frantically shaking your head to pretend that you don’t know that your favorite group in the world is right in front of you, talking to you, and seemingly excited to see you.

Like they knew you.

Which would be crazy and fueling your delusions, so you chalk it up to their amazing fan service that you only dreamt about after seeing and reading on social media.

Turning back to the group of guys – they’re literally just guys (but your favorite group of guys) – you muster up all the courage inside your body. “Can we be friends? Can we start over like it’s our first-time meeting and just be friends?”

They all nod their head as you smile.

masterlist | previous | next

author's note !!! get well soon, beomgyu! weverse notice he got a bad ankle injury :(

[skatingbi]

Yo we out here with some more Ace lives AU but i'll make them little bullet points so I dont have to write a whole essay. Enjoy my little headcanons!

Warning: Theres. So many. Im not sorry tho lmao

Ace joins the strawhats after the time skip, nobody really minds and theyre happy to spend time with luffy's older brother. He quickly becomes best friends with Nami. I just feel it in my soul that they would gossip together.

Both Ace and Luffy suffer from awful PTSD symptoms after Marineford. With Luffy, his crew eventually learn how to help him. With Ace, though, he only has Luffy to lean on for support until the crew get aquanted with him.

Actually, to add onto that bc im a sucker for acesan, Sanji is the first after Luffy to reach out during one of his bad days when even really small triggers can make Ace spiral into a panic attack.

More acesan sorry lmao. Ace is usually either out on the figure head of the sunny looking at the ocean when Luffy isnt occupying that spot, in the gallery when Sanji is working, or just out on the deck laying on the grass. He especially likes being around sanji in the gallery.

Pre timeskip Ace is extremely different than this AU's Ace because yes he's silly and carries an air of confidence with him still, but he's never shirtless around others anymore. For a long while, Ace doesnt leave the ship or pick fights. His confidence is a facade for a long time.

Depression hits ace like a truck in this AU and its only eased with the help of Luffy and Sanji. Chopper also helps the best he can with what he's got. Ace is grateful for this, and eventually his old self starts to emerge more and more. Luffy is there with him the entire time.

Ace has insomnia, but so does Sanji and Zoro. He'll hang out with them during late night hours either on watch with zoro sharing stories or with Sanji talking to him while he's doing prep work or inventory. He'll probably also fend off luffy when his little brother tries to break into the locked fridge lmao

But more funny headcanons!! Im getting depressing here sorry!! Ace will mess around with Luffy and entertain him before meal times by play fighting. Their asses will be duking it out on the deck and Chopper will be all concerned and Zoro and Nami will be like "Siblings." Like thats the most obvious answer in the world.

Tbh, the crew members with any type of sibling or sibling bond will get it. Luffy will deadass try to steal Ace's food and Ace will smack his hand lightly with haki and Luffy will dramatically exclaim how mean his big brother is.

"Ace is so mean! I'll starve to death!" "Yeah, sure, you little menace"

Ace regaining strength over his devil fruit powers by making little shapes out of fire for chopper, luffy, and usopp. Franky and brook join the group to give ace prompts. It becomes a nightly occurance at this point.

The first time he decides to go shirtless in front of the crew, they realize his old tattoo is replaced by scar tissue that covers nearly his entire back. Nobody says anything, but I think Franky and Nami would be really understanding. Also luffy. Luffy would be like "We match! Ace has a cool scar like I do!" and it reassures him but also breaks his heart simultaneously.

Ace eating nearly as much as luffy and Sanji being like "Are you sure youre not blood related? Because youre both gonna run my kitchen dry"

Ace not really having a defined role in the crew and them not really minding it. Ace floats around basically. It kind of fits him more that way since he knows a bit of everything. He'll look at maps with nami to chart a course to the next island, He'll fight alongside zoro and sanji, he'll tell usopp about different ways to use combustion and heat in weapons or ammo, etc.

Ace and nami using the power of their good looks to scam people lmao and ace being able to swindle men and women. Nami is impressed and also jealous.

Luffy growing his hair out so him and Ace match, but luffy apparently has curlier hair than Ace so its just a fluffy mess until usopp caves and teaches them how to actually take care of their hair (luffy does not absorb a single thing and ace now has to help luffy with his hair when it gets as long as his)

Ace noticing one day how zoro looks at luffy and being like "yikes...you got it bad, man" and zoro just being like "SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP-" but ace is fucking cackling and now zoro cant be too mad about that. He's still embaressed as fuck about it though.

Expanding on that actually: Ace actually being supportive because he knows how loyal zoro is. He isnt worried. Plus, Luffy is extremely strong and it takes a lot to actually hurt him. So he's like "dude you gotta just tell him straight up he is dense as hell"

Ace the ultimate wingman for zoro. Not luffy, though. That's what Nami is there for. Him an nami are definitely working together and placing bets on when and who asks who out with robin, usopp, sanji, and franky. I wont say what they chose for their bet but robin definitely wins.

BUT luffy, nami, zoro, robin, usopp and franky place bets on Ace and Sanji. Ace is never subtle. He flirts openly and is proud of it. Sanji is very subtle with ace, though. The crew immediately see past his bullshit of trying to be straight. Its painful to watch. Poor sanji is trying so hard to remain closeted but the closet is literally glass. I wont say who betted what as per my last bullet point, but surprisingly zoro won. Everyone (nami) is outraged by this incident. Luffy is here for a good time.

The crew playing card games except they learn sometimes ace cannot handle flammable objects because he will burn them accidentally. Competitive card games are now banned if ace is playing.

Ace is also banned from using his devil fruit powers while sparring on the deck. The poor grass on there has been burned so many times. Nami has kicked his ass over it.

Ace and zoro get really competitive. Not like zoro and sanji, but they'll spar without weapons and at least one of them will leave with a busted lip or eyebrow and a lecture from chopper. Theyre chill though they just forget to hold back on their punches. Ace one time used haki and had to help franky fix the deck afterwards.

[evermourning]

𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 - han jisung

pairing: han jisung x reader, lovertober entry viii

genre: fluff, comfort, non!idol au

wc: 8.9k

warnings: brother's best friend!han, language, mentions of alcohol, reader is OBLIVIOUS and jisung is WHIPPED, making out, gets very suggestive, getting caught, starts really fucking slow.

a/n: daylight. lover's final track. what a fitting way to end lovertober. thank you all so much for the immense support i received with this series...can't wait to see you for my next one!

p.s., i'm sorry about the length (i got carried away </3) and the delay (i have been so so so busy), please enjoy!

you'd known han jisung for a very, very long time.

you were ten years old. it was a sunny september afternoon, and you were sitting on the brick stairs of your childhood home, watching with annoyance as your stupid brother and his stupid friends played football in the front yard.

your brother minho, ever the athlete, was the quarterback, of course. he was yelling terms that were so foreign they sounded like another language as the scrimmage commenced. you were bored out of your mind.

that is, until one of his friends sat down beside you.

"hi. you're min's little sibling, right?" he asked. his knees were covered with scrapes and cuts, a bandage places hastily over his left one. he had fluffy black hair and two dark eyes you could get lost in if you looked for too long. he gave you an awkwardly adorable smile.

you nodded skeptically. minho's friends were usually up to no good.

"yeah. why?" you asked, and he giggled. it was cute.

"i always see you hanging around whenever i come over, so i just wanted to know. why do you sit on the step watching if you never play?" he asked, genuinely wanting to learn more about you.

"my mom wants us to get our exercise in, so she basically kicks us outta the house until it's dinnertime." you explained quietly. a little "oh" formed on the boy's lips. "what's your name, by the way?"

"jisung." he said playfully, extending a hand out to shake yours. "and you're yn, right? minho's always talking about you." as if he'd been listening in, minho appeared behind him in an instant.

"jisung, we're down a player. you can't just be chatting up yn like that." he rolled his eyes. after jisung muttered a string of insults beneath his breath, minho crouched down to your level. "if he starts nagging you again, come get me, okay? i'm your big brother. i've got to be looking out for you."

"he wasn't nagging me, though?" you said, confused. "we were just talking." minho sighed.

"okay...but i'm gonna keep an eye on him. i don't care if he's my best friend. he hurts you and he dies. violently."

being friends with lee minho meant ground rules were established. they were short and to the point, usually things about privacy and things people say and whatnot, but there was one main one, one he enforced the most.

yn is off limits. no exceptions.

to minho, the idea of any of his friends dating one of his family members was just so weird. he didn't really want any of them to hurt you and have to cut off a valuable friendship. so, he made it very clear to them that they frankly did not have a chance with you.

jisung was sure he did, though.

he knew his feelings for you were so wrong, and that minho would most likely gut him if he ever told him, so he bottled them up. for years and years. fighting urges to kiss you silly when he saw your outfit for prom, when he saw you in a swimsuit, anything. once he went away to college, however, he hoped that his feelings would simply melt away and he could move on from you.

how terribly wrong he was.

fast-forward to a decade later, he was now standing outside your front door, inhaling deeply. he knocked once or twice before minho excitedly opened the door.

"hey, jisung." he stepped aside so jisung could enter, smiling widely. "how's college going?"

your final years of high school were peaceful, yet lonely. minho and his friends had ventured off to different universities, leaving you to fend for yourself. jisung, namely going to some fine arts school where he was pursuing a career in music production.

jisung caught minho up on how life was going, expressing his dismay about being dumped as he slipped into the kitchen to grab a drink.

"i didn't think you'd be drinking this early, ji." minho teased. jisung laughed, taking a swig before offering it up to him. when minho shook his head, jisung chugged the rest of it with a chuckle. "oh, by the way, i've got something to tell you. don't be weird, but yn's coming home too. i think they'll be home...in an hour or so?"

jisung choked on his drink. so much for not being weird.

"there's no way." he muttered, resulting in minho raising an eyebrow. "i haven't seen yn in what- two years? three years? how...are they?"

minho smiled, almost slyly, checking his phone.

"you're about to see."

the front door opened, and you came in frantically, your face lighting up as you saw your older brother. you rushed over to him to give him a tight hug. when you turned your head slightly to see jisung, your face lighting up into a dazzling smile, jisung swore actual butterflies were flying around in his stomach.

you had gotten fucking hot.

somewhere along the line, you'd had some glow-up that turned you into something akin to a fallen angel. (actually, you'd always been gorgeous to jisung, he'd just noticed it more now).

"as i live and breathe, han jisung!" you beamed, hugging him tightly. jisung swore his cheeks were blooming red. you smelled like lavender and chamomile and he wanted to wake up and smell that every single day of his goddamn life. "you're so different, oh my gosh. you look amazing."

your jaw was honestly dropped at his transformation. he was lean, yet muscular, his body toned and tan. his hair was curly, a chocolatey brown color that complimented his eyes and skin tone so well. and when he looked at you, smiling, god...

"tell me all about it!" jisung said a bit too eagerly, leading you to the sofa to sit down with you. "how is university? have you made a lot of friends? what are you studying?"

his question made you remember a necessity.

"wait! thank you so much for reminding me, ji. i've gotta text my boyfriend and tell him i've gotten here safe." you smiled cheekily.

jisung saw red.

"i didn't realize...you were in a relationship." he said with gritted teeth. you nodded, a bit confused as to why the mood suddenly changed to something much tenser.

"yeah, um, it's not a super serious one, we've really only been together for like five months tops, but he's sweet." you said awkwardly. something about how jisung was staring so intently at you made you feel like you had to explain yourself.

"what's he like?" jisung asked indignantly. "uh, y'know, just in case i meet him...so i can...get along with him better."

he was not slick. how the hell did you not pick up on it?

he didn't know, because he breathed a raggedly sigh of relief as you laughed and began vividly describing your boyfriend, eliciting a grimace from jisung. god, this guy sounded fucking annoying.

"let's see...he's absolutely my type. he's adorable, kind, funny, caring, and hella talented. he's a great singer." jisung was a greater singer too. probably even better than this guy. he would crush him in karaoke. "but i wish he could play the guitar...that would make him so much more desirable to me."

jisung had a guitar in his trunk he was fighting demons not to go grab. it was the way your boyfriend sounded like a carbon copy of him that had him fuming. for fuck's sake, he was right here!

it was unfair, in jisung's eyes. once you'd admitted that your boyfriend had a very short temper and could be very controlling, he'd whipped his head around so his eyes could meet minho's. minho simply shook his head.

knock it off, he was saying.

how the fuck was this absolute douchebag able to date you but jisung wasn't? it was so fucking rigged.

your boyfriend wasn't even that handsome, either. he looked like any average twenty-something year-old guy. if anything, he had absolutely fucking nothing on jisung. jisung was the hottest guy he knew. a solid twelve out of ten. this guy was a four or less on a good day.

he reassured himself, remembering he had so many fucking weeks with you, without your boyfriend. his only problem, however, was not you or that guy you were fawning over. it was lee fucking minho.

twelve years and not a single ground rule changed. jisung was still not allowed to make any advances on you. therefore, he had to get better at being sneaky.

his first (and only) attempt to get you to break up with your boyfriend was on a wednesday. it was rainy, diminishing the possible activities you could do, so you opted to watch a movie with minho, jisung, and one of their other friends, chan.

it was some horror movie you couldn't stand one bit, jumpscares at every turn. you were flinching and hiding your face in jisung's shoulder. he wrapped a strong, comforting arm around you, to which minho gave him a look.

"hey, i got you. it's just a movie." he murmured softly into your ear. you giggled.

"ji, stop it. you're so cuddly, i have a boyfriend." you whispered, not to interrupt the movie. the words stabbed him in the throat.

"i know." he said quietly, drawing his hands back slightly. "but he's not here right now. you don't need to talk about him. you were talking just yesterday about how you were worried he didn't care for you. why are you still with him?"

"well...my friends are his friends...and we have so many memories that i'd hate to lose..." it was excuse after excuse. god. this guy had really fucked with you bad. maybe if your boyfriend ended things with you, you could learn to truly love someone, namely a super sexy and talented guy named han jisung.

"that's no reason to still be dating him. you could always try and end things on good terms and then-"

"jisung, enough." your voice was firm, implying this was the final time this conversation would be held. so much for trying. eh. he'd never been much of a negotiator in the first place, anyways. now, he just had to hope and pray and pray and pray for some amazing miracle.

four days later, it happened.

minho called jisung over to hang out. the day was rooted into his mind. they were laying on the sofa, one of the cats on minho and another in between jisung's legs, scrolling through social media. you were off in your room, on the phone with your boyfriend. the walls weren't super thin, so he couldn't really hear your conversation.

until the volume raised. louder and louder until you were full on yelling and jisung could hear every single sentence. every single word. every single vowel and consonant that left your lips. you were furious.

judging by the bits and pieces he was straining to hear as he acted disinterested, your boyfriend was pissed that being back in your hometown with all of your brother's friends meant that you were fucking them behind his back or something. you were on your last straw with his controlling attitude and you lost it.

"i'm so sick of you! we're done. don't fucking text me or call me." you snapped, hanging up and flinging your phone (jisung knew this because it made a loud crash, tumbling to the floor).

minho stood up awkwardly.

"i'm gonna, um, go check on them." jisung stumbled to his feet, scaring off the cats.

"i'll come with you, min. yn's close with me, too." minho wanted to say something, it was so obvious. but his mouth remained shut as they walked towards your room.

you were laying on your bed, crying. your eyes were red and the mountain of crumpled tissues upon your nightstand progressively grew and grew.

"honey," minho began, his voice soft. he only ever referred to you that way, gentle and caring. this, jisung knew all too well, was the very reason minho was so protective of you. minho had loved and cherished you since the day you were born, fighting off the monsters in the dark just to see you smile. it wasn't that minho wouldn't be able to forgive anyone who hurt you, he'd never be able to forgive himself.

and that in itself was his biggest fear. jisung was minho's closest friend and confidant. minho trusted jisung with his life. however, this also meant that accidentally hurting you would be seen as the greatest betrayal of his life.

you flopped over, staring at minho with red-rimmed eyes. he sighed, a sweet smile upon his seemingly cold features. you really brought out the best in him.

"i'm sorry about what happened. do you need me and ji to get you anything? something to eat or drink, a blanket, more tissues...or if you want to talk, i'll stay and listen." he sat down on the bed, and you sat up to scoot over and lean into minho, fitting with him like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.

"is it raining outside? i wanna look at the stars. me and him used to do that and i want solace." you mumbled as minho rubbed your back. he turned to jisung, thinking for a split second.

"i'm going to start making you some dinner. a good meal will get your mind off of this. the hill outside is perfect for stargazing. jisung can go with you. come back when you're feeling hungry, okay?"

you nodded. jisung's heart skipped a beat. this would be his first time alone with you all break! a win was still a win, regardless of whether or not the situation was ideal.

and now, here he was, laying in the cool grass alongside you. you were moping.

"there are clouds everywhere! it's not worth it. of course the universe fucks with me on a day like today." you whined. jisung gave you a hug, cursing himself when you flinched. was he coming off too strong?

you were right, though. a thick layer of clouds completely covered the stars, painting the sky a drab dark gray. the only thing that could be seen was the bright reflection of the moon, shaped into a mere crescent.

you clung to him, creating a damp spot on his shirt with your tears. he wrapped his arms around you, letting you cry into his shoulder.

"it fucking sucks, ji. i'll never get to go on all the dates i planned with him. i-" your voice broke. he patted your back. "i had a list. a list of all the things i was gonna do with him. now who can i do them with?"

"you can do them with me!" he interjected, a bit too frantic for his own liking. when you looked at him weird, he had to come up with some quick excuse he'd pray you'd believe blindly. "not in any romantic sort of way, but if you want to do them, i'm right here. we have all the time in the world."

you really didn't.

you gave him a tired smile before hugging him tighter.

"you really would? that's so sweet. you're such a gentleman, jisung."

that night, he died and came back to life. and so, the most important mission of his life began.

mission: make yn fall in love with me and do it all without minho finding out was officially a go.

he was snapped out of his daze when minho opened the door to the back porch, signaling that dinner was ready. like the perfect brother he was, he'd cooked up three plates of your favorite meal. your eyes lit up at the plates neatly made and you finished it almost instantly. minho and jisung watched you as you slid the fork between your lips for two very different reasons.

the way minho looked at you was almost motherly, like he wanted to hide you under his wing and keep you safe, to protect you every step of the way. his heart was absolutely shattered seeing you so beaten up over your now ex-boyfriend. he should've known, he told himself again and again as he sliced the vegetables, he should've known that guy was bad news. he wanted to wrap you in a bone-crushing hug and spill words of remorse and sorrow from his heart-shaped lips, to apologize for not being there for you.

jisung wanted to kiss you until you were a flustered mess beneath him. he wanted to run his fingers through your hair and caress your soft cheeks. he would have to shake these thoughts off for his next week, a week filled with definitely-not-dates with you.

monday

you stared at yourself in the mirror, spinning a bit to see all of the angles of your outfit. you'd just recently bought this top and you were a little unsure about it.

ending things with your boyfriend had completely thrown off your schedule for your break. and here you were now, getting ready to go to an aquarium with someone you hadn't seen in years. a knock sounded on your door. it was soft, as if the echo was a question.

"come in," you said, a tinge of unsureness upon your tongue. the door slid open to reveal jisung, wearing a cute crewneck and baggy jeans. he began smiling widely once he saw your outfit.

"you look stunning. i- i don't even have any words to describe you, you look so lovely. like the first warm day of spring." you felt your cheeks heat up at his words. for somebody so energetic and funny, he certainly was eloquent. it was as if he had some magical control over words and syllables, combining and separating them until he'd made the perfect match.

"thank you so much, ji! you look amazing too." his outfit was simple yet stylish, the color palette blending incredibly with yours. jisung never went out of his way to put this much effort into an outfit. was there any reason? (spoiler alert: there was)

his cheeks flushed pink at your words, and he outstretched one hand for you to take.

"shall we go?"

you'd never really noticed his hands before. you'd never really needed to in the first place. but they were soft, as opposed to the small callous on his index finger, probably from writing lyrics and schoolwork all the time. his hands weren't huge, but they were larger than minho's. his nails were painted expertly and delicately in hues of navy blue.

"i didn't realize you still painted your nails." you murmured, and he looked up, laughing sheepishly. "i remember being so jealous that i could never paint mine like you did. that's why i always asked you to do mine for me."

"practice makes perfect, i'm afraid. but you can ask me anytime, and i'd drop whatever i'm doing to help you. just say the word and i'll be there in the blink of an eye." his declaration seemed a bit off for just helping you with your nails, but everybody expressed emotions differently, so you shrugged it off.

his hand was still outstretched, never once faltering, as if he knew at some point, no matter the journey, you'd take it. and you did.

the aquarium was somewhere you'd always wanted to go with your boyfriend. it held such nostalgia and beauty that you'd been dreaming of the day you could go there with someone you'd enjoy it with. you were happy it was the first idea on your bucket list, something to get your mind off of the miserable day before.

you honestly still couldn't believe you were doing this with han jisung himself, anyways. he was your brother's best friend, and he was way too cool for you. he'd seen you as a little sister his entire life. this idea of his was out of the care and concern of his heart in the utmost platonic way possible.

jisung, on the other hand, was trying not to trip over his own two feet as he held your hand, seeing the awe in your eyes. he squeezed your hand with excitement, hoping his hand wasn't sweaty or anything. oh god...what if it was? he told you he needed to "readjust" his hand before profusely wiping it on his jeans until he was certain it was drier than the gobi desert.

the aquarium was absolutely beautiful, in shades of blues and greens. all sorts of aquatic creatures reside behind walls of glass, swimming around without a care in the world. it was divine. you walked around with jisung, hand in hand, pointing out various sea creatures. he seemed especially taken by the sharks, excitedly swiveling his head between you and the tank whenever they swam by.

eventually, you made your way to a room in the back of the aquarium, a large rounded glass tank in front of you. the lights had been dimmed to a midnight blue, letting the pale moon jellies show themselves. they languidly floated around, a dazzling sight. they were like clouds of the sea.

a wooden bench with a black leather cushion was positioned next to one of the tanks, and you and jisung sat down to rest your feet, weary from all the standing. he was looking through his camera roll at the photos he took.

you smiled at the little things he does. you'd been noticing them much more recently. the way his lips stretched into a crooked grin when he saw something he liked, the way he pouted if a picture came out bad or too blurry. it was endearing.

but it was also odd. the last time you'd been able to identify such minuscule details about jisung was when you were fourteen years old and had the fattest crush on him known to man.

you pined over him for a good seven months, making all sorts of excuses to hang out with minho and his group of friends. most of the time, his answer was a solid no. but sometimes, when he'd sigh and say "yes, but be good", you'd try and have all sorts of conversations with him. you loved his enthusiasm and interest as you spoke, as if he was hanging onto every word.

eventually, you came to the conclusion that he saw only ever you as minho's annoying kid sibling and was only being nice to humor you. you'd laid in bed, crying into your pillow, face warm from guilt and humiliation. from that day forward, you were always wary of men. you were scared that they wouldn't like you if you were too forward.

it was incredibly foolish, you realized. you'd based this claim off of absolutely nothing at all. you'd assumed jisung didn't like you. but there was no way he did, you were a hyper and silly kid and he was a teenager focusing on sports and whatever guys did.

"hey," he said, snapping you out of your walk down memory lane. a small smile graced his pretty face. "wanna take a picture with me and the jellyfish? we can make them into matching polaroids. i know you wanted to take polaroids with your boyfriend as a like- a couple idea, so we could be killing two birds with one stone?"

it was a great idea. you scooted closer to him, and he leaned in. jisung wrapped an arm around your waist, and you softly gasped at his gentle contact.

"say cheese!" he smiled brightly and you did along with him. you didn't think you'd be smiling like this the day after ending a months-long relationship. and yet, it felt like some enormous weight was lifted off your heart. you felt...free. and happy. really happy that you were experiencing this with han jisung, out of anyone.

you were so caught up in this inexplicable feeling of joy you didn't notice the pretty pink colour on jisung's round cheeks, or how he was staring at you the entire time.

tuesday

"have you seriously never been to a drive-in movie? not once in your life?" jisung asked in shock, from where he was leaning against your doorframe. he held your list in his hand, scanning it up and down. "they're holding one tonight. guess what they're playing?"

you thought to yourself.

"hmm...some cheesy-ass movie from the 80s?" you guessed, eliciting a chuckle from jisung's lips. you'd spent the entirety of your time "sleeping" and thinking about them. he'd been plaguing your mind all day- not that you minded, though.

"close enough. they're playing grease. that's from...1978, i think?"

you sighed, getting up to run a hairbrush through your messy hair. you couldn't go out looking like shit. that would be horrid.

"is it really?" at his nod, you giggled. "damn. i thought it was the 80s. i can't really make that assumption, though. i've never seen it in my life."

the way jisung's jaw dropped to the floor was so comical it was almost cartoonlike.

"what the actual hell. you've never seen grease?" his expression was stony, and for a second you were scared you offended him. then, you remembered it was jisung, who was rarely ever serious. "get your things and get in my car. we're going right now. you cannot go another second without seeing grease."

so here you were, in the passenger seat of jisung's sleek black convertible. he was driving well, focused on the road. at one point, his hand absentmindedly drifted over to rest upon your thigh. you felt your cheeks begin to heat up. when jisung became aware of the placement of his hand, he retracted his hand in a flash, apologizing profusely. his face was beet red. it was adorable. you grabbed his hand and put it back on your thigh, much to his astonishment.

"it's okay. i don't mind." you murmured softly. "you're not hurting anyone with your hand there. and the physical contact feels nice. the warmth of your palm on my freezing leg is enough for me. makes me feel human."

jisung absolutely melted at your soft words. now this, this funny feeling in his stomach which only surfaced around you, that he yearned for day after day while he was away at university, was exactly what he craved.

if he really did succeed in making you fall for him, how would it go? he'd done some digging, and your university was only a half an hour or so away from his. he could imagine it now, so vividly it was almost a film playing in his brain on repeat. he could text you sweet messages like "good luck!" or "how was your day?" and if he felt like it, he could come see you.

he would be the best boyfriend ever. way better than that dickhead guy.

he pulled into the drive-in theater, where an assorted group of cars where already there. various people had already settled in and were watching the beginning of the movie. few families were there, but most of them were people on dates.

"do you want to get out of the car? i have a picnic blanket my roommate from university lent to me that i'll gladly lay out on the grass, if that's what makes you comfortable." jisung suggested, pulling out a patterned grey blanket from the back seat. "i'm okay with whatever you want."

"let's sit on the grass. we're on a hilly area, so we'll still have a good vantage point. and besides, from up here, you can sing your heart out."

"we can sing our hearts out." he corrected. "don't think you're getting out of this one easy, hun. be happy i'm not forcing you to learn the entire 'greased lightning' dance."

you'd always liked funny guys.

the movie began, the plot exactly how you imagined it. however, it was actually really good, with fun choreography and surprisingly good songs. jisung knew every word, an imaginary microphone magically appearing in his hand the minute he heard the first few beats of a song.

it was so fun. he'd pass the "microphone" to you, staring at you in awe when your lips parted and you began singing the melody, soft and sheepish from embarrassment. your voice was heavenly. like the song of a siren, the way you hit every note with talent and poise and then proceeded to giggle it off saying "you weren't as good as him" was absolutely insane.

at some point, you had become so incredibly engrossed in the movie. rizzo was walking through the school, singing her heart out and it was so powerful you didn't even notice the wide expanse of goosebumps covering your body.

"oh my goodness, you're shivering." jisung noticed with urgency, and you peeled your eyes away from the screen. now that your focus was no longer on the movie, you felt the chill begin to overtake you. you snuggled into jisung, trying to capitalize on the heat leaving his body.

"you're right, i didn't even notice..." you gasped slightly, your teeth chattering. jisung pulled off his coat and gave it to you.

"here, put that on." he said, getting up to grab something else from his car. what was he hiding in there?

"won't you be cold without your coat, ji?" you asked with concern. he was wearing grey sweatpants and a long-sleeved shirt that wasn't made of any warm material in the slightest. he grinned, pulling out a fluffier blanket and wrapping it around the both of you.

"not anymore." he moved in closer until you felt your body against his. it was almost therapeutic. your head fell onto his shoulder, eliciting a tiny gasp from jisung's adorable lips.

the drive home was anything but silent as you excitedly rambled about the movie, explaining your favorite parts to a quietly satisfied jisung. he loved listening to you talk about things that made you happy. the way your hands moved to match your words with fluidity, the way your voice became higher with some foreign excitement. it was just like how you were when you were little.

"what are you smiling about?" you teased, noticing his adorably rosy cheeks in the pale moonlight.

"i'm sorry...i just absolutely adore listening to you talk about things you're passionate about. it's so endearing." he admitted, immediately focusing his eyesight towards the road ahead as to not see a reaction he'd be disappointed by.

if he'd just looked with his periphery, he would've noticed the flustered mess you'd become with a single response.

that night, you laid in bed, thinking long and hard about your relationship. these endeavors with jisung were exactly what you'd wished for time after time with your ex, only for him to fall short.

wait.

now that you were spending time with him again, you'd come to a conclusion. han jisung and your ex-boyfriend were uncomfortably similar, with their clothing and hair styles, their mannerisms, and their personalities. it didn't give you uncomfortable flashbacks in the slightest. in fact, you came to a massive conclusion.

you'd never gotten over jisung.

that was why you'd dated someone so similar. and you were still just as hopelessly in love with him as you were when you were a teenager.

oh shit.

saturday

you were in too deep.

every single date with jisung, you fell more and more in love with him. with his smile, his laugh, his gorgeous eyes, his caring nature, every single thing about him.

with every touch he placed on your skin, light as a feather, you felt yourself tread further and further past the point of no return. you couldn't stand it. you were running out of opportunities to confess.

what if you never saw him again after this? the next time you'd see him would probably be his graduation, and by then he might be in a relationship with someone. not a good one, because you'd come to the conclusion that nobody loved jisung like you did. even when you felt like you didn't, some core part of you kept that.

you loved passionately, most of the time confidentially. you kept your crushes to yourself. but if you had determined that you quite literally could not live without him, now that you'd grown so accustomed to seeing him every day.

you were in your sleep clothes, an oversized hoodie that was a hand-me-down from minho and flannel pajama pants when minho knocked on your door.

"good morning." he said softly, smiling at you. he held dori in his arms. "i made us breakfast. care to join me?" you loved weekends when you were with your brother.

your parents were always busy, so you'd really been raised by minho. he worked as a dance teacher outside of his studies, working late nights at the studio just to provide for the two of you. you loved your brother, to the moon and back.

you sat at the table, eating breakfast, contentedly listening to him talk about how his students were progressing nicely. you were so busy trying to get a piece of a scrambled egg onto your fork you almost didn't hear him pop the big question.

"so, um...jisung has been coming over a lot recently. care to enlighten me as to why?" he asked, almost nervously. "he's my best friend, yet he's coming over for you, and you're hanging out with him what- every night? i'm not mad at you or anything. i just wanna know the truth."

you sighed. you were much too embarrassed to admit you had any sort of feelings for jisung. it wouldn't hurt if you didn't lie...rather...skirted around the central idea, would it?

"he's been helping me cope with my breakup. i love you and i know i can tell you literally anything, but there's just something different about telling your story to a friend. you already know it, min."

minho probably did not believe your sob story one bit. however, if he didn't, he clearly didn't show it, because his lips parted to release a soft "ohhh."

"i get it. thanks for being honest." his words sent a pang directly to your heart. you hated lying to your brother. but, you were going over to jisung's house tonight and you had to make sure there was no suspicion on minho's part.

after a strenuous hour of getting ready, you were finally prepared. you took a deep breath, knocking on jisung's door. his family home was in your neighborhood, luckily, so you could just walk.

he opened the door, his eyes warmed at the sight of you.

"you've done it this time. you're the most gorgeous person i know. there's no competition. i know you're just in casual clothes, but damn." his mouth was agape, and he looked you up and down. you laughed at his words, trying to avoid the fact that your face was burning from his simple compliments. "i'm rambling, oh my god. let's go inside."

he stepped aside so you could enter. you'd always loved his house. his parents were very fond of interior design, so it was so architecturally beautiful it made you smile. the couches, walls, paintings, and doors were all color coordinated. once jisung led you through the door to his room, your lips stretched into an even wider grin.

it was so...him. rock band posters were plastered everywhere, and it was organized and minimalistic. he had a computer and some producer supplies, and in the corner of the room sat a gorgeous acoustic guitar.

"wow, it's so beautiful!" you said in awe, running a hand down the smooth wood. "i've always wanted to learn how to play. can you play some songs for me?"

he nodded, pulling the guitar off its stand.

"let me tune it real quick, and then we're good to go. any song recommendations?" he asked as he began tuning the instrument. his fingers moved swiftly, expertly. he bit his lip in concentration. "sad songs? love songs?"

"a love song would be nice. you can choose one." you responded, coming over to sit beside him. he thought for a bit, before beginning to strum a lovely chord progression. the song was on the tip of your tongue, and once he started singing, you were in for it.

i found a love, for me...darling just dive right in, and follow my lead

it was perfect. of course it fucking was. you felt your stomach flip with delight, playing into some hopeless fantasy that he was singing it for you. that he was playing the guitar so beautifully, trying to convey a message.

i found a girl, beautiful and sweet...oh, i never knew you were the someone waiting for me

you inched closer. his eyes were focused on yours, and he sang with a smile, never missing a beat.

'cause we were just kids when we fell in love, not knowing what it was

was he singing it to you? was he telling you to your face that he loved you, or were you just delusional?

but darling just kiss me slow, your heart is all i own, and in your eyes, you're holding mine

you couldn't do it anymore. he had to know. you couldn't hide it anymore.

"jisung, stop." you said shakily, and he obliged.

"what is it?" he asked, concerned. had he done something wrong? he would admit, he was carried away with his serenade because all of his feelings were so fucking real, but if he was making you uncomfortable, he'd stop instantly.

better now than never.

"um, this is gonna sound really weird, and you have every right to say no or tell me to get out..." you were rambling, and jisung was silent with an unreadable expression. "i have, like, really strong feelings for you. and it didn't just happen. i loved you when i was little and i love you now, i just stuffed these thoughts away to the back of my mind. if you think about it, my ex was just a cheap copy of you."

jisung wasn't talking. he was just staring at you with his jaw dropped.

oh shit. you fucked everything up. over a decade of friendship. ruined.

"it's okay, i'll just go, i'm so sorry...it's obvious you don't like me back." you said, humiliated. as you went to leave, you felt jisung's hand wrap around your wrist.

"did you just say i don't like you back?" jisung murmured in disbelief, shaking his head. "oh my god. you are so fucking oblivious."

you cocked your head.

"what?"

he led you to sit on the bed next to him, his skin flush against yours.

"how have you not realized i've been head over heels in love with you since we were in grade school?" he sighed. "i never pursued you because min doesn't let any of his friends date you. but i thought of you every day while i was at university. i dreamed of you when my brain was too tired to think. i dated here and there but i was a horrible, horrible boyfriend because i never wanted them. i wanted you. but you never noticed me pining over you. does that make sense?"

you nodded, fighting the tears of joy threatening to fall from your eyes. you reached a gentle hand towards jisung's, and he enveloped your hand in his, holding it tightly.

"can i...kiss you?" he asked softly, waiting for your permission. you nodded, your heart racing as he leaned in. his thumb brushed against your cheek as his lips met yours in a gentle kiss ten years overdue.

it was sweet, laced with a quiet passion that grew as he kissed you again and again. it was so lovely, almost as if fireworks were shooting off in the distance.

when he finally pulled away, his hand rested on your hip and he was breathing a little heavier, staring at you with a twinkle in his molten chocolate eyes.

"will you grant me the immeasurable honor of being mine? no lies and no miscommunication this time. i promise." he held out his pinkie, and you giggled as you curled yours around his.

"you've got yourself a promise, ji." you replied, bursting with delight.

a realization dawned on jisung. he hadn't even brought minho into the equation.

"one problem. minho wouldn't be happy with me if he found out about this. he's told his friends and i it for years- you're off-limits. but now...i just broke his rule. we're gonna have to sneak around behind his back..."

you patted your boyfriend's shoulder. god, it felt divine being able to say that.

"it's okay. he won't catch us." you laughed softly, giving jisung a hug, solidifying your love in stone.

thursday

you'd almost been dating jisung for two weeks! this was an achievement for you, because every single day you were with him felt like you were drifting away on a fluffy cloud of ecstasy. he made you unfathomably happy.

so far, hiding your relationship from minho was going surprisingly well. to try and throw him off of your trail, the three of you started going out more when minho didn't have work. you'd also convinced jisung to prioritize minho's texts and hangouts for the time being.

it was a lot easier said than done, though. minho was observant and cautious, picking up on any unusual signs and forcing you to come up with lies on the spot. he'd look skeptical, but not push the question, thankfully. however, some gut feeling told you he'd find out any day now.

how would he find out? you asked yourself. would he see you two in public from a distance? would a friend inform him? would he find out accidentally? it was a scary thought.

one night, you were laying on your bed, reading some book your mother had recommended to you. it was an amazing book, filled with intrigue and plot twists that left you reeling and begging for more. in between your legs, resting his head on your chest, was jisung.

you'd learned from him being your boyfriend that he was a total sucker for physical touch. like a koala, he was always clinging to you by any means possible.

"baby..." he whined, flipping over to rest his chin on your tummy. "what's in that book that could possibly be more important than me?"

"someone just got murdered, ji. they're trying to figure it out." you replied ignorantly, eliciting a whine from jisung. you giggled, reaching a hand down to entangle your fingers in his dark curls. he sighed dreamily as you massaged his scalp.

"boring, boring, boring." he muttered, grabbing your book out of your hands and placing it neatly onto the nightstand. "shit. how should i save your page?"

"there's a bookmark in the book! use it! han jisung, if you doggy-ear that page, i will fuck you up." you laughed loudly.

thankfully, tonight you had zero worries about minho catching you and jisung. he was working out with chan and then he had an hour and a half teaching private lessons for one of his students. he wouldn't be home until at least 8:45pm, and since it was like 6:30 you could probably sneak jisung out by 8:20pm and get a twenty-five minute grace period to make it look like nobody had been over. life was good.

all of a sudden, jisung gave you a devilish grin, and positioned himself so he could easily climb on top of you.

"ji, what are you doing?" you asked with a chuckle, reaching up to caress his soft face.

"givin' you lots of kisses, duh." he leaned down to brush his soft lips against yours, and you wrapped your arms around his neck. the kiss grew more and more heated in a blink of an eye. it happened so fast. one second he was giving you gentle kisses, like the touch of a fairy, and the next his tongue was in your mouth dancing with yours.

he pulled away after a very long makeout session, a string of saliva connecting your lips to his raw, swollen ones. he licked them with a smile, and shifted a bit so he could lean down and press wet, open-mouthed kisses along your neck, shoulders, and collarbone. you almost groaned at the sensation, but covered your mouth with one hand. jisung giggled at this.

"you don't need to hide those pretty noises, babe. nobody can hear us. we're alone." he snickered, before resuming his work kissing and sucking on your neck until your skin was littered with baby bruises the color of cherries. thankfully, jisung wasn't an idiot, so he only left marks in places you could easily cover with concealer or hide with your shirt.

to him, you were ethereal in this position, pressed into your bed. lips raw and parted in an "o" shape, hair splayed out in a halo around you, your chest heaving.

"you look debauched in the loveliest way possible, gorgeous." he grinned, his fingers now reaching down to the buttons of your shirt. "don't you feel embarrassed at all? i'm literally going down on you on your childhood bed."

you laughed breathily.

"shut up and kiss me again."

your response was cut short. you would have said something more, something almost provocative, if your door didn't open abruptly.

"hi, honey. i'm home early. my student was sick, so i'm gonna get started on dinner-" the scene was almost comical. you and jisung both turned your heads in slow motion to see minho standing there, a grocery bag in his hand and shock upon his face. "jisung. get the fuck off of them or i'll snap your neck."

jisung shot upright, cheeks beet red as he helped you up. minho noticed the marks on your skin instantly. he looked furious. you'd never seen your brother this way, ever.

"we have been friends for what- fourteen years? and what has been the recurring thing i have told you, time and time again?" minho hissed. jisung hung his head in shame.

"you said yn is off limits." he murmured. he slowly lifted his head to meet minho's eyes, searching for the tiniest speck of sympathy, but there was none there. "look- i can explain."

"what is there to explain, jisung?" minho snapped. "'oh, i always want what i can't have, so i'm gonna defile my best friend's sibling behind his back.'"

"min, that's not what happened." you tried. no luck. "i confessed to him first. if anything, it was me. not him. don't take this out on him just because you won't take it out on me."

"don't even say anything. i don't want to hear a single word out of you. everything i do is to protect you! i've looked out for you our entire lives. i...i love you immensely and endlessly, yn. that much is true. but i can't allow this. i wouldn't want to lose jisung because of something you did or something he did to you. and i wouldn't want to lose you because you're so hurt by someone like him." minho's voice broke. he was done. he sighed, and stormed off.

you turned to stare at jisung.

"i, um, think you should go." you murmured, wrapping your arms around him and kissing his cheek. his toned arms made their way around your waist, and he hugged you tightly.

"okay. text or call me if you need anything. let's figure this out tomorrow."

you were with jisung. you loved him so much. but what was the cost of loving him?

friday

minho wouldn't speak to you.

he left for chan's before you woke up, sending you a brief text telling you where he was. you opened the fridge to see a plate stowed aside for you, a sticky note with your name on it on top. huh. even though he was mad, he still went out of his way to make breakfast for you.

you knew you were in the wrong. it wasn't okay of you to sneak around behind minho's back, but if he was too petty to talk to you, then it'd be hopeless.

after eating, you called jisung. he picked up on the first ring, like he always did whenever you called.

"minho won't text me back. he's leaving me on read. god, he's petty when he's mad." his voice sounded a bit gravelly, meaning he'd probably just woken up. you hoped your call didn't serve as an alarm for him.

"i feel bad, ji." you murmured, flopping down onto the couch. the cats sensed your discomfort and padded over to you, rubbing against your legs and purring to try and get you to relax. "i know he would've been mad either way, but do you think he would've been less of a dickhead if we'd just been up front about it?"

"i guess. i'm embarrassed i suggested we keep it a secret. but what's past is past. now, we've got to figure something out. i love you, but he's my best friend of fourteen years. and i love him, but i've been madly in love with you since i was a kid. i don't want to lose either of you."

you smiled fondly at his sweet words. sometimes, he always knew the right thing to say to put you at ease.

"when he gets home, i'm going to talk to him. i'll text you how it goes." as you were saying this, the front door opened and he stood there, looking at you with a cold expression. you wanted to cry. "speak of the devil, he just got home. i love you, bye." you hung up, feeling absolutely powerless. but you weren't defeated yet. you still had your words.

"min," you began. "now that we've blown off some steam since last night, can we talk? jisung and i care so much about you, and neither of us want to lose you."

you followed him to his room, where you sat down on the bed beside him. he was not too enthusiastic.

"well, you shouldn't have jeopardized that by fucking my best friend." minho replied solemnly. you were infuriated.

"i haven't fucked him at all, min. don't jump to conclusions. besides, we haven't even been dating for two weeks. see, the reason we were hanging out so much is because he was helping me with a this sort of- bucket list that i had, of date ideas. and i didn't get the chance to do them with my ex, so i did them with him." you explained. minho was listening, thankfully. "and then, i realized i had feelings deep down for him i'd been harboring since i was younger. and i couldn't keep them in anymore, so i told him. and he told me he'd been in love with me since i met him."

minho nodded, his eyes still untrustworthy.

"okay. how much do you love him?" he asked.

"i love him so much it hurts to see this happening. you're his best friend and he's suffering without you. he was texting me, complaining all night. and no, i know what you're going to ask. i don't love him more than you. romantic love and familial love are on two very different ends of the spectrum."

minho was silent for a moment, reaching out to take your hand.

"i'm sorry for acting this way. i'm sorry for punishing you with silence. i've watched you grow up from a little kid with big round cheeks to the successful, loving person you are today. when you broke up with your last boyfriend, it took everything in me not to go fucking kill the guy for breaking your heart. but this, this is different. jisung is my best friend. i love him so much, and i don't know what i'd do with myself if he ever hurt you. if anybody i cared about hurt you." you gave your brother a tight hug, and he wrapped you in his arms.

"i understand. but we both know jisung isn't that kind of person."

"and you," minho whispered, and you barely caught it. "will you promise not to break his heart? i'll...i'll think about getting behind this if you do."

"i promise. i swear on my life."

that night, you lay in the grass once more with jisung, staring up at the stars. his arm was wrapped tightly around you as you pointed out various constellations with a jubilant look upon your face. god, you were adorable. he rolled you over slightly so he could press a loving kiss to your lips.

the sky was clear, the clouds pushed away to reveal an angelic array of twinkling lights, set against an ebony blackdrop.

"you can see the stars tonight." you whispered gleefully. jisung laughed.

"you can, can't you? they're really beautiful. just like you said. just being here with you brings me eternal solace." he brought your hand to his lips and softly kissed each of your knuckles. "i love you, to the moon and to saturn."

taglist: @darkypooo, @hyunbae-35, @kpopmenace143, @stateofdelicategrace, @elizaschuyler18, @lillithathecat, @imastraykidsfan, @nightimescapes, @mal-lunar-28

@evermourning, ©2023. all rights reserved.

[samubytheocean]

like what you see?

Summer loving had me a blast- ripped boys, hot air, sparkly drinks and throwback music?- oh those summer nights!

College party au, fluff, originally had seven parts but got too long so might become a series if y’all like this one? lmk

You swear you’ve checked your reflection at least twenty times before heading out. Ten times you’ve fixed your makeup with your phone. Five times standing awkwardly glancing at the tinted windows of the car parked just outside across the street. Made sure that your top was spread out perfectly, snug and a little naughty, but perfect for a hot night like this. Your hair set across your shoulders. So why, does your gloss feel a little smudged already? Why, does do you already feel sweaty? And why, God why is he standing just right at the door?

The sweat rolls through the back of your flimsy top, and you already feel drunk. The air smells like beer. Sweet, humid, chill with an aftertaste of bad choices. And if you squint through the electric guitar bumming through the walls, there he is, right there, a cup in his hand, leaning on the doorframe, talking to his buddy. The humble t shirt he has on does not look humble, with his pecs almost bulging out under a thin layer of sweat. He stumbles laughing at something stoic his friend says, and you can see his body contort through the shirt. There’s no way you’re not blushing now. Stupid volleyball boys and their abs. Fuck it, he invited you here. There’s no reason to back up now.

He sees you, and his warm smile widens to acknowledge that you’re here. You smile a nervous hello. Walking up the stairs, you feel naked. You’re sure you’re drenched in sweat now. Fuck. The rock is drumming through your veins. Or is it just your own beat? Whatever he was drinking, you needed to chug it down. No, like three of it. He’s still talking to his friend, listening intently and nodding, but his eyes are glued on you. You confidently put up an act, stopping right in front, maybe a few steps away from the boys. (You don’t catch him wiping his palms on his pants)

“Last but never least, huh?” His friend nods a friendly hello to you, which you respond by an absentminded small wave as he leaves indoors, leaving you the only ones out. The house is buzzing with laughter, and it feels so strange, being around so many people, but at the same time now only with him. There’s just a wall, between you two and several dozen people. You feel like you’re on a watch, but you’re not sure if it’s them or the boy in front of you, leaning down slightly. He smells like mint, the kind you pick off in your iced tea at a local cafe. Cool, but yeah. So sweet.

“Hey.” He hushes, a surprisingly gentle tone contrasted with his usual demeanor, the drink in his hand, the bass now ringing through you, or pretty much anything about the situation. You repeat the words. Looking up at him. There’s still this awkward space between, slightly too far away for a hug. You hope he can’t see the anticipation whispering all around. He raises his arm, and slowly runs his hands through his hair. You can’t help but follow the movement through with your eyes.

The rock music rises, and everything seems in slow motion. The drum, you’re sure it’s your heartbeats now, fills the damp air. His arms contract as his fingers comb his fluffy hair, and yeah, you’re staring now. How could you not? The faint vein shifting as he lets out a shaky breath, you can almost feel the ends of it on your face. It seems to sober you up a little. He notices your gaze, and his cheeks curl in the most charming tease. His arm stays up, as he slowly grabs the doorframe, his fit upper body fully tightened, his shirt basically screaming for help, all while maintaining eye contact. Smooth fucker.

“Like what you see?” He blurts bluntly, the alcohol now rushing through him. He knows how he is built, but he’s not that proud to admit it himself. He’s being satire. He hopes you know that. There’s like a hundred thoughts on his mind, a million wanting to be heard, and his pulse might just tear through his body. He also hopes you know that. He asked you here, so he knows he should get the conversation going, but you look just so pretty right now. He wants you to like him. Trying to get a pretty girl’s attention was more difficult than he thought this would be.

“There’s someone trying to get through.” You suppress a small laugh as you walk closer, the sudden situation rushing your body with dumb confidence. You put your hands on his broad chest, pushing him slightly backwards. You’re met with no resistance, as he looks down to meet you with wide eyes, clutching at his now all melt cup. He follows your fingertips backwards, the alcohol, heat and the music all dizzying him up, and your simple touch is the only thing he can focus on right now. Apart from your pretty face. Wherever you’re pushing him backwards into, he’s willing. Fuck, he’ll skip backwards there if that’s what you ask him to do.

You look up at him, his back now against the hallway wall. He doesn’t even notice the people slightly grinning at him as they get out. You smell so good. Coconuts? Raspberry? Whatever it was, he could drown in it. Gladly. Your eyelashes fluttering, your small hands still on his chest, the small surface of touch sending electricity straight to his heart. He gulps, awkwardly forming a smile, trying to think of something, anything to say. Fuck, the only time he tries to use a line on you, just be his luck he fails miserably. He has to say something now. Maybe something dumb? Something nonchalant but sweet? His face is blushing furiously now. He can feel the back of his shirt sticking to him. You’re just too pretty. And too close. He feels like passing out.

And he almost does, right there and then, when you nervously look up flashing the sweetest smile and say-

“So back to what you asked me,”

The sound of people singing along the music subsides to nothing as you lock eyes,

“Guess I did, but it feels even better.”

HINATA, BOKUTO, IWAIZUMI (okay a little bit more stoic in front of oikawa but hear me out), SUGAWARA, DAICHI, GOSHIKI

YUUJI (my frat boy yuuji agenda is strong), INO

JEAN, REINER, and fuck imagine ERWIN in his early twenties

[concreteburialplot]

VIRALITY // 12

12 - Liar, Liar*

pairing: nicholas ruffilo x fem!oc [vallie]

more: chp 11 // masterlist | crossposted: ao3 | word count: 14.7k (strap in)

Summary: Following Noah and Vallie's thrift shop adventure, Vallie faces the consequences of her actions. After the launch of their new music video, Vallie realizes she might not like what she wished for. A pivotal decision reshapes the group's dynamics, leading to a significant change in the connection between a specific pair.

warnings: alcohol, bratty noah, smoking, heartache, yearning, regret, jealousy, unprotected sex, cream pie x2, oral (f receiving), cum eating kinda?, angry nick but also soft nick???, fluffy???, she's just a girl ok, mediocre writing lol, sorry this has taken 500 years, my apology is that it's long as fuck, 18+ MDNI

Disclaimer - This story is AU since it does not follow actual timelines or events. The band here is still fairly small & does things entirely on their own with no other support.

Reminder; Minor band crossovers (greta van fleet / chase atlantic) to supply side characters :)

don't like it don't read it. don’t be mean for no reason & let others enjoy things thnx :)

VALLIE

When Noah and I walk up the gravelly incline to the warehouse, the rest of the band and Bryan are all on their phones lounging on different surfaces - chairs with feet propped on tables, against the brick wall, spread out on the floor. Boredom was an understatement. 

“Well, took you guys long enough.” Grumbles Jolly. “What did you get lost picking out scarves?”

My heart skips a beat at the coincidental wording. “Sorry, we really had to dig to find anything.” I mumble quickly, throwing the plastic shopping bags on the ground.

“Well, did you find anything good?” Jolly asks.

“Oh, we found something good alright.” Noah replies, shoving his hand into a plastic bag to retrieve the cursed fedora.

I roll my eyes and playfully smack his arm, “Shut up.”

“No.” He says matter-of-factly, with a popped hip and a hand on his waist. “It’s your fault, you put it on my head.”

“Yeah whatever.” I laugh and wave off his silliness.

I suddenly feel all eyes in the room on us accompanied by an awkward stillness. Of course they’d be thrown off, we could barely be in a room together before we left, why wouldn’t this be strange?

I glance up for a split second before digging into the bags and find Nicholas’ eyes watching us intently. His brows low and eyes sharp.

In my tummy swirls a feeling so closely reminiscent of guilt, similar to when I was with Kras last night. But neither make any sense. Nicholas and I aren’t anything, it shouldn’t matter. Kras and I are just friends. And Noah and I definitely are not anything. And yet, here he is looking angry and here I am feeling guilty.

After handing out the thrifted clothes and a wardrobe change, the boys come out in their new clothes, and they look perfect. The pieces we chose embody each one of them flawlessly. They fit the direction Noah wants for the music video but they’re rather simple. Folio’s is the most basic in a plain black shirt, black jeans, and his sneakers. Jolly’s is a black long sleeve button down, tight black pants paired with his hefty combat boots. Noah’s outfit was centered around the black peacoat we found as the statement piece with a black turtleneck beneath it, black pants and boots. We even picked up something for Bryan even though he was staying behind the camera - he got a vintage Kodak t-shirt, which he thought was “rad as hell”. 

Since I showed up in last night’s sweats, I figured I’d pick up an outfit as well. I found a grey sundress. It’s something I would normally only wear in casual settings, but I wanted to be comfy and it was the only halfway cute thing in the thrift shop.

The outfit I picked out for Nicholas was the best one, but I may be biased. It’s a thin black sweater with thumb holes atop a black turtleneck paired with baggy, strappy pants and finished off with black leather combat boots.

With the new uniforms, the band and crew seem to have a reinvigorated morale. It did exactly what I needed it to do, it gave them the spark they needed to bring the music video to life. 

We spend our time running the song over and over while Bryan gets shots from all angles. I got some content for posting and even posed the boys for some social media trends, which they all hated except Folio, and Bryan in the background. Since I was done gathering content, I sat at the plastic picnic table on the far side of the warehouse diagonal from the makeshift stage while they continued to shoot slightly different variations.

I plug my phone and camera into my Macbook to import the photos and videos I took to begin editing them and schedule them for posting.

“Vallie.” I hear a voice call amongst mumbling between a take.

I snap up to match the voice to the source: Noah.

“What’s up?” I respond, half expecting to be met with some sort of criticism or snarky remark.

“Were you paying attention to this last take?” He questions, but not in an accusatory way that I’d normally anticipate, just genuine curiosity.

“A little, why?”

“What did you think of the intro?”

A hush blankets the room and the rest of them look between us as if they’d seen a ghost. I’m glad we’re finally kind of getting along but I wish he wouldn’t make it so obvious. Especially in front of Nicholas. The odd feeling in the room dances a chill up my arms leaving goosebumps behind.

“Oh um, I liked it? It was cool.” Truthfully, I’m not sure that I did like it, but I just wanted to move on from being in the spotlight.

He gives me a wide, genuine grin like a kid in the middle of a playground, “Sick, I thought so too.”

I glance over at Bryan, who is slowly but surely becoming my lifeline in these situations. He offers a ‘I don’t know either but just roll with it?’ look with a brow wiggle and a barely noticeable shrug.

Mid-shoot everyone needed some sort of touch up. I somehow had my job description expanded to include wardrobe and makeup.

The one I dreaded the most was Nicholas.

I walk over to him, mute, focusing my eyes straight forward which for me happens to be his chest. I keep my gaze away from his eyes as I fix the collar of his cardigan.

He too keeps his focus off of me.

“Sorry I acted like an ass earlier.” He says sounding partially sincere, partially grumpy. “It was out of line, and I’m sorry.”

I clear my throat. An apology was the last thing I expected and the last thing I deserve. “It’s okay.”

A quiet pause fills the small space between us.

“So, you’re seeing someone?” He questions casually but I can tell it’s anything but casual.

I press my lips together contemplating if I really want to commit this hard to the ruse. But Kras is right, and my gut is right. No matter how much I want to stay entangled with him, it can’t continue. I don’t know how well this action plan is going to work, but I have to try.

“Yes.” I lie with fake confidence. “Kind of.”

He takes a moment to process my response which makes me question how good of a job I did with lying. Finally, he nods, his eyes still locked on something past the opening of the warehouse.

“I’m sorry. I should’ve told you.” I sweeten the lie.

“I guess that’s a good thing then, you know, for our jobs and all.” His voice light, as if he’s purposefully making it seem more nonchalant than it is. I know I hurt him, I can hear it in his voice. Whether it was his heart or his ego that I hurt, I’m not sure but all I know is that we went too far. “It just would’ve been nice to know.”

The painful twist in my chest confirms that I made the right decision to stick to the plan. I'm already so invested in him that it hurts; I can’t imagine how much worse it would be if I let myself fall any deeper.

I swallow the very faint lump in my throat and flatten out the thin material resting on his chest. Spending another night with him was a bigger mistake than I realized because just the warmth of him beneath my fingertips makes me want to melt right into him. I wish I didn’t know what he felt like, what he sounded like, what he tasted like. Suddenly I want to take everything back. I want to unkiss him, unfuck him, unknow him. In the span of knowing them and being on their team, I’ve regretted it about 75% of the time but there, standing in front of him, it is a solid 110%.

I wish I had just heard them on the radio and found myself at a show, 

or met them in passing during industry events,

or maybe bumped into him in a coffee shop where he suggests his favorite latte,

or literally any other scenario that would grant me the luxury of just reaching up and kissing him without feeling confliction or guilt. 

The reality of the whole situation hits me all at once and my entire mood shifts abruptly, in a way I’ve never let happen while I work. I’m normally exceptionally skilled in the art of separating my emotions from most other things but this cuts through all of that. He lowered my walls more than anyone ever had and reached a part of me I’ve never let someone do before. I swallow hard and blink the burning in my eyes away. The last thing I need is for him to see my eyes full of tears. 

So, I do what I think makes the most sense. I yank each edge of my mouth into a tight-lipped smile and step back to hold out an overly professional hand, “Friends?” 

He nearly grimaces at the word and begrudgingly snakes his hand into mine, gripping it firmly and giving it a shake. “Whatever you want, Vallie.” He grumbles sarcastically before walking off back to the set. 

He leaves me with my hand vacant and my eyes blinking at the wall he just stood in front of. I knew he wasn’t happy with me, but I didn’t know we’d end up starting over.

The music video that Noah had fast tracked was finally finished regardless of what the others felt. It was filmed and edited by Bryan with Noah glued to his side the whole time to make sure it followed his “vision” for it perfectly. It was hyper tuned into the details and nuances Noah was looking to cultivate for the prematurely released song.

Two weeks later, I hit post on the music video with the band scattered around the rehearsing studio, celebrating with beers and laughter. I roll my eyes playfully at the happy, excited actions that ensue behind me but bite down on my lip to keep myself from smiling. While it’s not everything they or I wanted, it’s still a damn good video and I’m proud of them for it. 

All entanglements aside, it’s the first time that I’ve felt like I truly helped them achieve something great. Their growth and publicity had been steady but incredibly slow despite all of my best efforts. Their initial boom from the band going viral months ago plateaued. I’ve been chalking it up to the lack of content, but the faint fear of chronic stagnation has been creeping up my ribs every so often. It’s something I warned them from the beginning - “Anyone can go viral, but it won’t last.” I recall telling them at the very start. “Don’t get attached to the numbers.” I told them that it burns bright for a split second then gets snuffed out by the next big thing to come along. But they didn’t listen to me, and I can see the disappointment and fear worsening in Noah’s features with each day that passes. It’s all made me wonder if there was even a place in the scene for them, or if what their label is trying to accomplish is possible. It made me question my ability to execute the task handed to me.

I posted all of the music video promotions across all forms of media and posted some of the pre-filmed short form content onto TikTok and Instagram. “Alright well, your part is done now, I’m just gonna keep working.”

I stand, beginning to gather all the papers scattered over the table. “With all the teasing I posted for the video and all the extra content we filmed, engagement has gone up by about 5%. I estimate it going up by about another 10-15% for the next couple of weeks while the music video gains traction.” I dropped the edges of the paperwork against the table a couple times to align them into a neat stack. “You’ve gained a significant amount of followers as well, at least compared to before the promo content.”

“Aw Vallie,” Bryan throws an arm around my shoulders pulling me into a side hug. “Is this your way of saying we did a good job?” 

A small smile tugs at one edge of my lips, “I’m just saying that the music video is projected to do really well.” I sink my teeth into my lip again, this time to keep from speaking but it fails. “And, I think you guys did a great job.” I rush the words out at the end.

The large grin is nearly identical across the five boys' faces, each one unique in their features, but the glow of finally birthing a new project is potent in all their smiles.

As they mingle about, I return my focus to my screen and sit back down. Likes and comments begin to pour in, faster than expected. The promo posts over the past couple weeks built up a significant amount of anticipation and excitement, I just didn’t expect it to gain momentum so fast. Compared to other clients, this engagement is nothing, a couple hundred comments within the first 30 minutes, but for them, it’s huge. I decide to keep it to myself for now to not get their hopes up too high since the numbers could plateau quickly. 

But before I exit completely, my eyes catch a couple comments that churn my stomach unexpectedly.

nobody told me the singer was so hot !!

damn he’s fine as fuck

oh my god Noah is so !!!!

the whole band is fine wtf 

god that bassist is sooo sexy

My eyes narrow and my teeth involuntarily clench at the last comment. A dull ache throbs in my chest at the words, a feeling I’m not quite sure I’ve ever experienced before. 

My plan to leverage their looks was working. This is exactly what I wanted, what I held meetings for, what I fought for, what I was hired for - so why does it suddenly feel like a loss?

I glance at Nicholas, who’s joking with the others, his face lit up with a carefree smile. My heart aches but, this is exactly what I wanted for him. For them. Yet, the jealousy gnaws at me, sharp and unrelenting. I want to be happy for them, I should be happy for them. But each comment feels like a tiny dagger, reminding me of what I’ve deprived myself of.

I exhale and close the lid to my laptop. I tap along the table just trying to shake my head from whatever confusion is clouding it. I just need to get out.

The group talks amongst themselves as they celebrate, and I inevitably fade into the background. I start gathering all my belongings to throw into my tote bag to hopefully make a quiet exit.

“You liked the music video?” A voice startles me from across the round table. 

I look up to find Noah. I quickly glance to the red solo cup he’s holding carefully in his hand. It makes me wonder what’s in it and if it will lead to the same aftermath I've seen before with a drunken Noah. It’s only when I look around that I realize that each of them has a drink in hand and they’ve put music on. 

“Yeah.” I shrug, “I think you guys did good.” 

“We, you mean.” He corrects.

“We?” 

“Yeah. You helped pick out the outfits and did all the promo stuff, did you not?” He raises a brow. 

“Yeah? I guess I did.” 

Noah rests his arm on a nearby high-top table, taking a sip of his drink. “We made a deal, you and I a while ago, do you remember it?” He questions.

I silently filter through our meetings in my mind. While working together we’ve made many deals, but I land on the one I know he’s talking about and a smile creeps across my lips. “‘I’ll do my job well, if you do yours.’” 

An unexpected wide grin pulls at his mouth, “Well, I think we both did our jobs well here.” 

He was right, we did. Looking back at the meeting just a few months ago seems so juvenile now. Noah was so angry about me being brought on to the crew and while I wouldn’t say he’s necessarily thrilled that I’m here now, I can tell that I’ve grown on him. I proved myself to him, at least a little bit. 

“Yeah, we did.” I nod with a genuine smile, “Proud of us.” 

He wrapped an arm around me and gave me a squeeze, smiling down at me. “Me too.”

I leaned into him and caught a glimpse of Nicholas watching us both. The look on his face was flat and filled with an unreadable expression. 

My eyes flicker down immediately to avoid him then pull away from Noah’s grasp. He then goes on to ramble about music and the album, I’m not quite sure why he’s over here talking to me and not to the rest of them but, here I am. His words fade into the background as I look past him to spot Nick again. This time he’s caught up in some excited conversation between Brian and Folio. His wide smile meets his eyes filling them with such happiness as he laughs. His tattooed fingers interrupt the condensation on a beer bottle and his hair is gathered up into a low bun. He looks breathtaking and it suddenly fills me with a sadness I don’t think I’ll be able to beat here. 

I’ll never have the opportunity to be with him at a party like this, or out to dinner or have a normal, run-of-the-mill relationship. There’s a bit of heartbreak in watching him ensue in an interaction we may never have now that I’ve ruined everything.

But I ruined it for a reason, my brain reminds me.

I catch Nicholas’s eye. His smile falters, and for a moment, I think he senses my unease. I quickly look away, swallowing the lump in my throat.

The ache that makes home in my ribcage does not care for reason; its only concern is pain. It suddenly becomes unbearable, and I need to leave, now. I need to go home, I need to fucking get of out here.

 “I’m sorry, Noah but I have to go.” I hurriedly throw my bag over my shoulder and snatch my keys.

“What? Why? Is everything okay?” Noah asks, concerned.

“Yeah, I just… I need to go,” I say, my voice wavering as I avoid his gaze. “I have an important meeting I have to be home for.” My hand tightens around my keys so hard that the jagged edges dig into the flesh of my palm.

I stand up, the room spinning slightly as I do, despite not having anything to drink. I head for the door, each step feeling heavier than the last. I can feel Nicholas’s eyes on me, but I don’t dare look back.

Pushing through the front door, I take a deep breath of the cool night air, but it does little to calm the storm inside me. I walk quickly to my rental car, fumbling with the keys as tears blur my vision. Finally, I manage to unlock the door and slide into the driver’s seat. 

As I drive home, the tears flow like rivers down my cheeks. The ache in my chest is relentless, a constant reminder of what I’ve given up and the lies I’ve told. I made my choice, and now I have to live with it. But the pain doesn’t care about reason or decisions. It only knows how to hurt.

I don’t stop driving until I reach my Airbnb. I stumble inside, dropping my bag on the floor and collapsing onto the couch. The tears flow freely now as I sink into the furniture, wishing things could be different but knowing they’ll never be. As much as I’d like to, I can’t undo my decision nor change the reasons behind it. As long as I work for them, Nick and I can never be anything more than just friends. Maybe in another life, there’s a him and I that work, but it’s not this one.

It doesn’t matter how much it hurts seeing him at events, or getting comments in videos, or even just being around him. He’s not mine and he can’t be. I’m not what he wants anyway, his career is just taking off the last thing he needs is to be entangled with someone who wants more than just sex. Is that even what I want? I barely even have time to fucking cry in the car, how would I balance a relationship?

Mourning the loss of what could’ve been is hard, but an inevitable breakup would be worse. However, just because I chose the lesser of two evils doesn’t mean it’s easy.

I glance at the time on my watch and scramble when I realize I’m late for my meeting. Unfortunately, I didn’t lie to Noah about that.

Flipping open my laptop, I’m right on time when the zoom call rushes in. I wipe the remnants of my tears and allow myself one more sniffle before answering.

The bright, shining faces of my original clients light up the screen. With drinks and cigars in hand, they greet me with their usual exuberance. They’re getting one last party in before they leave for tour soon. It’s the first tour I haven’t joined them on since working for them. The realization that I’m not going with them mingled with the feelings I just ran away from only worsens the pain in my torso. There’s nothing more I wish to do than to just run off with them to Europe and forget all about this mess with Nick. But I have too much on my plate to be touring with them right now, so I’m working remotely for them temporarily.

Their naturally cheery demeanors lift my spirits, and while it is still a work call, they always seem to make work fun. It makes me wish even more that I was going with them. Working for them has always been easy and enjoyable. The stark contrast between them and Omens is jarring. While we do have a longer history, Greta has always felt comforting, uplifting and loving – like family. I always feel valued and appreciated, and I never have to question my belonging with them.

Omens, on the other hand, has been nothing but complicated, painful, and uncomfortable. Instead of feeling like I’m part of something, I often feel like I’m navigating through a minefield between Noah’s volatility and Nick’s complexity. It’s hard to feel motivated when the environment is so hostile, and it leaves me questioning my place and purpose. Up until recently that is – things seem to be looking up now that Noah and I are getting along.

Comparing the two bands makes me long for the simplicity and warmth of Greta even more. The comfort and camaraderie I immediately feel when answering the zoom only highlights the cold, challenging reality of working with Omens. It’s a reminder of what I’m lacking and a painful acknowledgment of the complication of my current situation. The situation I put myself in.

Yet, Noah’s words ring in my ears, “We did our jobs well.” Perhaps it’s not as bleak as it once was. The memory of our truce plants a seed of hope in my chest. Maybe Bryan was right, that they just need time to come around.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost!” The bassist, Sam, jokes, pulling me out of my thoughts. The bright white of my screen flashing on my pale face in the darkness of my living room can’t be doing me any favors.

“You need a drink, Val?” Jake, the other long-haired guitarist asks, raising an enticing drink in a short glass.

“Maybe a smoke? You are in California after all.” The shaggy-haired singer, Josh, teases.

I force a smile and shake my head. “I would kill for both of those right now. Just a fucking exhausting day.”

“I know, our girl’s makin’ it big, taking on new bands, new quests.” Jake states in a dramatic, faux-English accent. “On to new horizons.” His arm splays out theatrically to a non-existent skyline.

“Leavin’ us behind!” Sam adds loudly in a whiny tone as he takes a sip of his cocktail.

The last words shoving a sword into my gut. Maybe Nick isn’t the only loss I’m mourning. Working for Greta has consumed my entire life for years, they’re the closest thing to family I’ve got. Perhaps not being engulfed in them constantly has left me lonely.

I roll my eyes lightheartedly and shake my head, “I could never leave you guys, you know that.” Clearing my throat, I change the subject. “How are you guys feeling about the tour?”

Their excitement is infectious, and I find myself relaxing a bit as they talk about their plans and the cities they’ll visit. For a moment, I forget about Nick and the tangled mess of emotions he brings.

“Hey, Val!” Josh shouts, raising a glass snapping me out of my haze. “We’re going to miss you on this one!”

“Yeah, it won’t be the same without you,” The quiet drummer, Danny, chimes in.

I force a smile, trying to push the sadness aside. “I’ll miss you guys too. But I’ll be there in spirit, and we’ll keep in touch. You know I’ll be checking in every day.”

They laugh and raise their glasses in a toast, their contagious energy making it a little easier to breathe.

The boys filter out, saying their goodbyes to entertain the other guests at their party.

“Yeah, I’ll catch up to you guys later. I have to ask Vallie about something.” Sam waves the boys away.

He turns in his chair to face me, a look of concern washed over his face as he tucks a chunk of long hair behind his ear. “Are you okay? You seem a bit off?” He asks softly.

I take a deep breath, trying to steady my voice. "I'm fine, Sammy. Just a lot going on."

He looks at me for a long moment, his puppy-dog eyes filled with understanding. "You know you can talk to me, right? If you ever need anything. We're all going to miss you on this tour, but we understand why you can't come."

I nod, "I know. Thanks, Sam," I reply, with a tight smile. "I appreciate it."

Under other circumstances, I would maybe try to talk to them but they’re so excited for Europe, I can’t possibly weigh them down with anything serious.

He gives me a reassuring smile. "Take care of yourself, okay? And if you need to vent or anything, just call. We're all here for you, we love you a lot."

"Thanks," I say again, feeling a lump form in my throat. "I will. I love you guys too."

With one last nod, Sam ends the call, leaving me alone with my thoughts and letting reality crash back in. I close my laptop and lean back in my seat, staring at the other side of the vacant couch. The room feels emptier than before, the silence more suffocating. I can’t shake the feeling of being left behind, both professionally and personally.

I set my laptop on the coffee table and pull a blanket over my body in hopes that it would help me disappear. I curl up in the corner of the couch with my knees up to my chest. I haven’t felt heartache like this since high school and it’s over something that was never even serious. My mind keeps drifting back to Nick, to the hurt and anger in his eyes when I pushed him away. I know it was the right decision, but the pain is parasitic in a way I was never prepared for.

I blink at the blank wall in front of me. I’m not home, I’m not with friends or anyone I know. I work for a band that half hates me most days, I fell for a boy I can’t have and I’m staying in a pay-by-weekly Airbnb. I’m alone in a city I hate, in a home that’s not my own with people who barely like me. That’s when I realize that perhaps heartache isn’t the only pain that sits heavy in my heart – it’s also the weight of loneliness that’s been consuming me, rotting me from the inside out.

Only when I acknowledge the seclusion is when it wraps around me like a suffocating shroud, seeping into my very core and eroding my sense of self.

I close my eyes and let out a long, shaky sigh, trying to steady my racing thoughts. I have to keep moving forward, despite the overwhelming difficulty and the sadness in my bones. There’s a faint flicker of hope buried somewhere beneath the despair, a small, stubborn, workaholic part of me that refuses to give up. For now, I hold on to that glimmer, however faint, and vow to take things one step at a time.

This was the 4th rehearsal in a row that I’ve attended this week, and while it never gets old watching their sets, the content becomes repetitive. So, while the boys are playing and Bryan snaps shots of them, I scroll through Zillow.

I don’t even notice that they’re done until Nicholas is beside me cracking a water bottle open. “What’re you lookin’ at?” He asks. Slowly but surely, we’ve been making our way back up to being friendly, despite the break down I had weeks ago after the music video launch. If I just focus on the work, I can almost stifle down our history. Almost.

“Oh shit, you scared me.” I chuckle but it soon fades with the frustration that’s built up over the past couple days. “Augh, I have to find an apartment or something because this Airbnb is getting so expensive. My other client’s tour just started, and I just took on another band, so I’m stuck here for a while. But I can’t fucking find an apartment building that doesn’t have a waitlist before next fall.”

“Shit sucks around here.” Chimes in Jolly from the corner taking a sip of his Gatorade.

“Here let me see.” Nick swivels my laptop towards him before I have a chance to stop him. He holds his tongue between his lips with his brows furrowed, like he’s focused on some super spy mission. He scrolls for a while, adds some filters, scrolls, takes more filters out, then turns the laptop back to me. “Ta da!” He smiles his signature grin and it’s nice to see it in my direction again.

“Whoa, how the fuck did you find that!” My eyes nearly pop out of my head as I scroll through the listing, it having almost everything I was looking for. “Oh my god, they’re doing a showing for a perfect place right now, I gotta go.” I hastily begin packing my things up, haphazardly throwing all my scattered belongings into my tote.

“Whoa whoa,” Halts Jolly, “You’re not going alone.”

I furrow my brows at him, confused, “What do you mean?”

“Listen, do you know how unsafe it is for a woman to go to realty showings alone?” His voice is so filled with genuine concern and a splash of paranoia.

“You need to stop watching so much true crime dude.” Folio rolls his eyes.

“Yeah, he’s obsessed.” Bryan adds with a pointed thumb towards the long-haired man. 

I blink up at Jolly who’s face is dead serious. “We’re coming with you.”

I normally wouldn’t let men tell me what to do or how to do it, but maybe Jolly is right. Men are dangerous especially around here and I have also heard horror stories about women going to check out a house and it turning out to be a sketchy place with an equally creepy man.

“Okay.” I nod. “Fine.”

Looking over the four of them, I realize that Noah had already disappeared. He’s been cutting out immediately after each rehearsal, so I think nothing of it.

“I got nothing better to do.” Shrugs Nicholas. I don’t look too much at him because if I did, I would notice the strain behind his eyes - one that looks both pained and conflicted. 

Arriving at the open house, I walk around the small loft, letting my fingers trail over the cracked railing of the stairs. The apartment is smaller, dingier and dustier than advertised. When I make it upstairs, the 4 are up there already. I catch them looking unimpressed, almost disgusted at the place but immediately feign impression for my sake.

“It’s…pretty nice, Vallie.” Says Folio, with a forced smile.

“Oh, spare me, it’s a dump.” I sigh, defeated. “The asking price is like double with all the fees and shit. It’s ridiculous.” I rub two fingers into my temple. “I don’t know what I’m gonna fucking do.”

There’s a bit of silence filled with pitiful faces from the group. Nicholas’ eyes look focused but lost in thought. Before any of them could speak, Bryan perks up. 

“My old room in the house is empty since I moved out last year. Why doesn’t she just move in with you guys?” He suggests as if it’s the most obvious answer. 

My mouth nearly falls open at the insane suggestion. The trio’s focus snaps to him with the most shocked and betrayed looks on their faces, brows raised and jaws open. 

“What?” I ask for clarification, because he couldn’t possibly be serious.

Bryan ignores their reactions. “Exactly what I said. It just makes sense? You’re with them all the time.”

“I uh-“ I falter, somewhat overwhelmed with the four of them looking at me. “I mean, it really seems like that’s a group decision…”

“I’m cool with it.” Folio surprisingly speaks up first, “We do have the spare room and we could use the extra rent money. You take a lot of Ubers to get to us anyway, so.”

For once Folio seemed to be cooperative, nice even. Maybe they are warming up to me afterall.

Jolly sighs heavily, “They have good points. It would be convenient but… Noah’s not going to be happy.”

Anxiety wins over the excitement dying to bloom in my stomach as I look over and meet Nick’s gaze. His eyes contain the same pained and confused look as before. He’s conflicted.

“I couldn’t give less of a fuck about what Noah wants. He’s outnumbered 4-1.” Nick snaps. “She needs a place, and we have one.”

I tug at my lip and contemplate my options. This would be the easiest and cheapest path. “Okay fine. Just for now. I’m gonna keep looking so I don’t overstay my welcome.” I meet eyes with each one sternly. “Thank you.”

I’m grateful for the offer but I can’t help but be nervous about being so close to Nicholas all of the time. The room I’d be staying in is the empty room between Noah and Nicholas’ rooms. I’d be between the two I would least like to be around. I contemplate backing out for a brief moment but quickly remember how much the Airbnb is costing me weekly. As much as I value my independence and solitude, it’s just not worth the cost and isn’t sustainable. The last thing I ever want to do is live with them, but it seems to be the only good option right now.

A week later, the boys help carry the last of my boxes up the stairs while I warn them about how if they break anything they’ll be paying for it.

Nick, Jolly, and Folio are all out of breath as they set down my boxes.

“Jesus, how do you have so many boxes of stuff from that tiny Airbnb?” Folio asks, wiping the sweat from his forehead.

I shrug, “I had some of my stuff from home shipped out to me, since I’m staying in Cali longer than I expected.”

Jolly and Folio filter out leaving me alone with Nicholas. I’m immediately on my toes around him. Just being in the house with him is difficult. The only other two times I’ve been here, we’ve slept together - once on the couch downstairs and another in the room beside us now. It’s hard not thinking about having him that way again with those reminders all around me. The memories pack a punch not just in my core but in my heart as well. We’ve just started to get back to normal after our little falling out. But what even is back to normal with us? Were we ever really normal?

“Do you need help unpacking?” He asks though it doesn’t seem forced or ingenuine.

I ponder the offer as I shift on my feet but ultimately shake my head. “Not now. I don’t know if I’m going to fully unpack yet, since I’m still looking for another place.”

He nods, seeming somewhat unhappy about my response. “Okay well, if you need help with anything, let me know.”

“Okay, I will. Thank you.” I scratch my arm anxiously and pause before I speak again. “I feel bad… I know Noah’s unhappy because I’m here.”

Nicholas sucks in a breath. “Yeah, he’s not happy. But I don’t really know what else to say to him. Maybe you should talk to him.”

I let out a laugh. “Yeah fucking right. I’m sure I’m the last person he wants to talk to right now.”

“You never know. It might help.” He steps towards the door to leave. “I think we’re gonna order Chinese for dinner. You cool with that?”

I nod and he reciprocates before leaving the room downstairs. 

I take a deep breath and shake out the nerves from my hands as I walk to Noah’s door. I give it a knock and wait for a response.

“Come in.” He calls and I peek through the cracked door.

He rolls his eyes and glares at me. “Great, it’s you.”

“You know you don’t have to be like that.” I say calmly while I push the door open more and lean against the door frame.

He doesn’t even look at me and keeps his eyes on the TV across from his bed where he lays. His hands are diligently working on a gaming controller. I can’t help but notice how his long-tattooed fingers rapidly and strategically click on the buttons. Something about it creates a slight buzz between my legs.

“You just invited yourself into my home. I think I have some right to talk to you any way I want to.” He retorts.

“I didn’t invite myself; I was invited. By your bandmates, your best friends. But you know that already. You’re just being an asshole.”

“Again, this is my house. I can be an asshole in my house if I want to. This is what you signed up for. But you know that already.” He mocks me with my own words.

I try my best to keep my bubbling anger from spilling. We had been doing so well since the thrift store, but it seems that we’re back to square one all over again.

“I’m not trying to be here forever, alright? This is temporary. Like I want to be here any more than you want me to be. Believe it or not, this isn’t exactly a walk in the park for me either.” I sigh, trying to keep my composure. “I’m just trying to make the best of it while I’m here, okay? Can we agree to just be civil?”

He glares at me, but I know he knows that I’m right. “No promises.”

As I look around my new room, I suddenly feel closed in by the towers of boxes that surround me. I should’ve waited until after I signed some sort of apartment lease before having some of my stuff shipped from New York. I was just homesick for a place of my own again, that I wanted my belongings outside of what fits inside a couple carry-on suitcases. I’ve been living out of suitcases for longer than I’ve ever wanted and so maybe unpacking some of my clothes and things wouldn’t hurt much. Afterall, I could always just repack them. When I stand and find that some of the towers are even taller than me, I recognize that I might need help afterall. 

I find myself in front of Nick’s door and a nervous feeling swirls in my stomach that I try to ignore. 

This is a bad idea, I think to myself.

But it’s too late. My knuckles have already met the door. 

After a couple moments, Nick opens the door with a gaming headset pulled off his ear and a controller in his hand. It’s clear by the way his eyebrows drop that he was expecting anyone but me. The look is enough to make me back out of my own decision. 

“Oh, sorry to bother you, you’re obviously busy, nevermind!” I ramble quickly in a way I rarely do - but I rarely feel the way I do with him. Mid-turn to get back to my room he unexpectedly grasps my wrist, not hard but not soft either, enough to keep me in place. 

“What’s up?” He asks and I can’t tell if he’s annoyed or genuinely curious. 

“Oh, um, well, you see,” 

Fucking get it together 

“I was going to ask if I could take you up on your offer? To help me unpack?” I already regret the words before they leave my mouth. “But if you’re busy it’s no big deal!!” 

“I, uh, yeah. Sure. Let me just finish this round and I’ll come help.” He begins pulling his headset back on before I can fully answer.

“Oh, yeah sure. Take your time!” 

He closes his door, and I dart to my room, immediately pacing the small amount of floor I have available.

Why did I fucking do that?

“You okay?” His voice speaks from the doorway where he’s propped up against. 

I nearly jump out of my skin, not expecting him there so soon. It makes me wonder if he had just quit his game instead of finishing it like he said. 

“Oh, yeah yeah.” I wave him off. “I always get nervous with moves.” 

It was a lie. With my job, I’ve had to get used to moving often, so it doesn’t phase me any more. But with the shake in my voice, I know it wasn’t a great sell. 

“Right.” He replies skeptically, pushing himself off the frame. “What did you need help with?”

“I need that box up there.” I point to the box above my head. “And that one.” I gesture to the one right beside it at the same height. “And that one.”

He chuckles at how the boxes seem like skyscrapers to me, “Okay sure.” 

He pulls each one down with ease. 

“Anything else?” He asks. 

I sink down to the floor behind one of the large boxes. “I’m just gonna start unpacking these, if you wanna help.” I shrug up at him. 

Nick looks over at another box, grabbing something before handing it out to me. “I think you might need this.”

Blood rushes to my cheeks at the mistake, “Thank you.” I lift up and take the box cutter from him. 

I thought that would be the limit of his contribution but to my surprise, he sits down across from me. When I give him a confused look he simply jokes, “I’m really interested in what the fuck are in all these boxes.”

I bite down on my bottom lip to keep a grin from spreading across my lips. After our conversation at the music video shoot, this is the last thing I expected him to do. 

I’m still sat on the floor with half empty boxes while Nick acts as the fuel to the operation, putting things wherever I direct him. He slides a chunk of books into a bookshelf that was left behind. Books are always the first thing I like to unpack after the necessities. They're so personal and really give a space a real essence of you. I’m only unpacking my favorites to display for now since I don’t know how long my stay will be.

“You sure do have a lot of books about pirates?” He states quizzically, with an arched brow and a chuckle. 

“Oh,” I laugh, “Yeah, one of my clients really loves them for some reason.” I gesture to the books he just shelved. “I get one of those every Christmas. Those and a box of fancy cigars.”

His eyes look over the spines of the grandiose black leather books. “You’ve been with them a long time.” He observes each one, then looks over at me. “6 Christmases.” 

I blink up at him because there’s no way it’s been 6 years already. Logically, I knew I’ve accumulated a large stack of those books, but it isn’t until now that it clicks. “Wow. You’re right. I hadn’t thought about it like that.” 

“They’re lucky to have you.” He says, crouching down to get more books. “You’ve done so good for us so far, I can’t imagine what your main act gets.” 

The statement feels almost double edged, though it doesn’t seem that he intended it that way. It’s simple and meant to be flattering but it just settles a guilt in my bones. It sounds like he believes that Omens aren’t a priority, which isn’t true. 

“It’s not like that.” I scoff, handing him another set of non-pirate books.

“Oh sure, as if you don’t prioritize Harry Styles over us.” He shoots back playfully.

The Harry bit has gone so far that it makes me wonder if they truly believe it, it would be hilarious if they did. 

“You know I don’t manage him. Wish I did though.” I laugh, shaking my head. I grab another couple books and tug at my lip contemplating whether I should start some lighthearted competition. “You know… Noah guessed my ‘mystery client’.” 

A mischievous smirk blooms on my lips when Nick’s brows raise with an, “Oh did he now?” 

I nod, “Yep! Gonna have to step up your game I guess.” I shrug jokingly.

“Well, I’m either gonna have to go shake him down or,” He points to the room next door with the box cutter then looks at the mess around us. “Or I’m just gonna have to keep unpacking until I figure it out.” 

A giggle escapes me and a warmth blooms in my tummy. I hate that this is how my body reacts to him, but I quickly snuff it out. “I guess so.” 

As he continues to help me, the room overflows with laughter, and I can’t remember ever having fun unpacking. I try not to dwell on the way I feel when I look at him for too long. If I can just push aside the flutter in my chest when he crinkles his nose, or when he smiles wide and sparkles fill his eyes, or when he makes my name sound like music — if I can just move past all of that, then maybe living here won’t be so bad. Perhaps friendship with Nick wouldn’t be so difficult if it looks like this. 

The first week was awkward and uncomfortable and foreign, but the boys acclimated faster than I imagined - which, thinking about it now, made sense. They’d spent the better half of their lives being forced to live with random people for unforeseen periods of time. They just moved around me, and I moved around them, we all were on different schedules and busy doing other things better than paying attention to each other. Outside of rehearsals or meetings, I rarely saw them. The boys have an affinity for the nighttime while I’ve been operating on three different world clocks due to my other clients touring in different countries. 

I found that juggling three bands when I was barely managing two, was becoming quite taxing. I usually pride myself on my work ethic and multi-tasking skills, but it’s wearing on me in ways I’ve never experienced before. My sleep schedule is basically nonexistent, having to be awake for California, Europe, and Australia times simultaneously. I work between cat naps and run off of at least 4 cups of coffee daily. While work has been miserable, it’s definitely helped keep my mind distracted.

After a much-needed shower and a fresh set of button-down pajamas, I follow the smell of pizza downstairs. I find the boys gathered around the kitchen.

“Hey Val.” Folio smiles then falters, “You look fucking exhausted.” He shakes his head apologetically, “Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. Just - help yourself, there’s plenty. Noah can put away like three pies on his own.” He chuckles nervously, pushing past me to the living room. 

“Think of it as your belated welcome party.” Jolly says before taking a bite, leaning against the counter. 

“Thanks.” I smile but it doesn’t meet my eyes when I notice Nick remained silent and Noah’s absent.

Jolly nudges my shoulder as he walks out of the kitchen, “Noah’s picking out a movie for us, if you wanna join.” 

“Cool.” I nod, fidgeting with my fingers. As much as I’d love to protest wasting my time, all I need to do right now is sit and turn my brain off for an hour or two. 

“Can’t guarantee it’ll be any good if Noah’s picking.” He calls over his shoulder. 

“Hey!” Shouts Noah from the couch. 

The edges of my lips curl up slightly at the interaction but quickly fall. Even though it's been about a week, this is the first actual night of us all together. It’s only then that it settles in my bones the reality of the move.

I precariously pluck a slice from a half-eaten pie and plop it on a paper plate. “You uh,” I thumb over my shoulder. “Stayin’ for the movie?”

He pushes himself off the granite counter. “I was planning on it, yeah.” He peels another slice from the round and places it on his already full plate. He’s in a dark hoodie for a band I’ve never heard of with the sleeves pulled up to his elbows, showing off all the beautiful ink on his arms. I try not to let my eyes linger too long on the way his fingers fold the slice in half. “You?” 

I steal a water bottle from the fridge and lean against the counter. “Yeah, if he picks a good movie.” I tease. 

He nods and makes his way out of the kitchen. 

I shake my head to wake myself up some more and meet the rest of them in the living room. My feet are the first to freeze when my eyes land on the screen. Noah chose the same indie horror movie that Nick and I had chosen the night he stayed in with me. How he managed to find and decide on the same random movie we did, I’m not sure. What I am sure of is the way my heart feels like it fell into my stomach. My hand grips the plate, and my eyes instinctively search for Nick. His gaze meets mine, the look in his eyes about matches my own before he hardens it. His jaw clenches and he focuses back on finding his place on the couch. 

When I finally make my way over, I find there’s only one seat left between Noah and Nicholas. I take a silent but deep inhale before squeezing between them. The close proximity to Nicholas sends a familiar, anxious thrill through me, but I push it aside, trying to focus on the moment. We’re friends now. Colleagues. I have to keep reminding myself of that. We’ve only ever been colleagues.

“Alright, everyone shut up.” Noah waves a lanky arm around with the remote clutched in his hand. “Movie time!” 

Folio reaches up and flips the lights off to cast an eerie darkness across the room, perfect for the mood of the movie. As the opening credits roll, my heart drops sharply and makes the idea of the pizza on my plate nauseating. The memory hits me like a wave, threatening to pull me under. I can see it so clearly in my head - us sharing two different kinds of chips, Doritos and Cheetos. I can hear the storm that raged that night, the one that kept him from leaving. I remember vividly the conversation we had about having that team-building party. I can hear him promising that the boys would come around. I blink quickly to keep tears from spilling down my cheeks. The last thing I need is to cry in front of them. 

Noah nudges me with his elbow. “You okay? You look a little pale.” He asks with a smirk, teasing me as if I was already scared fifteen minutes into the movie. In the corner of my eye, I can see Nick glance over at us, trying to disguise the fact he’s obviously eavesdropping. 

“Yeah, just... tired.” I half-lie, giving him a weak smile while keeping my eyes on the tv.

“Sure, scaredy cat.” He laughs, returning his focus to the screen.

The movie continues, and I’m transported back to that rainy night. I wasn’t nervous that entire night until we were sitting criss-crossed next to each other watching this specific scene before the first jumpscare. The flutter of nerves didn’t find home in my belly until we both jolted at the perfectly timed jumpscare and our knees ended up pressed together for the rest of the night. I remember the way his hand brushed against mine, the way we laughed and screamed at all the right moments. Sitting here now, with him so close yet so far, is torture. 

As the film progresses, I can’t help but notice Nicholas shifting slightly in his seat. His arm brushes against mine, sending a jolt of electricity through me. I hope no one else notices my reaction. It’s jumpy and juvenile, the way we both try our best not to have any part of our body touching for too long. 

Halfway through the movie, a particularly frightening scene makes everyone scream and laugh at each other’s fear. Nicholas turns to me, and for a brief moment, our eyes meet. There’s a flicker of something in his gaze, something that tells me he remembers too. But then he looks away, and the moment vanishes.

The rest of the movie is a blur. I’m too focused on the memories, the emotions, and the painful reality that the past is just that—the past. When the credits finally roll, I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding and everything is suffocating and tight. 

Folio reaches up from his seat in the recliner and flicks the light back on. “Jesus fucking christ, Noah.”

“What the fuck.” Echoes Jolly.

Noah grins widely, obviously proud of his peculiar choice. “You’re welcome.” 

“It was great.” I rush the words out and quickly push myself off the couch. “I need to get some air. Excuse me.”

A cackle erupts from Noah, “Musta scared the shit out of her.” 

As I speed to the front door, I hear someone smack him with a pillow and Nick’s voice telling him not to be an ass.

I nearly burst through the front door and find salvation in gripping the porch railing. For a moment I question if I might actually get ill. Never in my adult life have I ever felt such visceral agony over another human being, nonetheless a man. The cool night air brings a welcome relief and finally I feel like I can suck in a full breath.

I squeeze my eyes shut when I hear the door open behind me and my heart races when Nick appears in my peripheral. Fuck. 

“Hey,” he says softly.

“Hey,” I reply, my voice almost trembling.

He pulls something from his pocket, flipping the top open and holding out a box of Newports to me. “Want one?” 

I sigh, contemplating it even though I haven't touched a cigarette since college, but god do I need it now. “Thanks.” I pluck a cig from the box and place it between my lips. I cup the end from the wind while he flicks the lighter for me. The second it’s sizzling and lit I take a much-needed deep inhale, letting the nicotine fill every gap in my lungs giving me a split second of reprieve. 

I close my eyes as I exhale, hoping the smoke would take the pain that sits in my chest. For a moment, we stand there in silence, the weight of unspoken words hanging between us. The sounds of the night filled the quiet, frogs croaking and far off traffic from the city. 

He steps closer, close enough that I can feel his warmth and the smoke of his cigarette. “I remember that night, you know.”

I pause, swallowing hard. “Me too.”

The ache in my chest is palpable, like it sits between each individual rib. I feel it in my bones, in my veins, in my fucking marrow. 

When I made the decision to distance myself, to hurt him, I thought it was the best decision for us all. I had no idea it would hurt this bad. It hardly seems like a good idea now. 

Every part of my body tenses up like a muscle throbbing in pain. My index and middle fingers involuntarily squish the cigarette, and my fists tighten. I have no reason to feel this way, I did this. 

“Val,” he says, his voice breaking through my turmoil. “We never really… talked.”

I bite my lip hard, the cigarette trembling between my fingers. “What’s there to talk about, Nick?” I can’t bear to look up at him. 

“Us, Vallie.” He says more sternly this time, turning to me fully. “You just shut me out. And I got upset so I walked away, but we didn’t talk about it.” 

Of course, the only man I fall for is the one that actually wants to talk about his feelings. 

“We made a choice, Nick.” I grind my teeth to ward off tears, keeping my gaze focused on a far off tree. 

He shakes his head, stepping even closer. “No, you made a choice. And I went along with it because I thought it was what you wanted. But standing here now like this… I can’t help but wonder if you made a mistake.”

I close my eyes and exhale. All I want to do is give in to him, tell him he’s right, that I did make a mistake. But my reasoning and logic remains the same. 

The words hang in the air, heavier than the smoke around us. I don’t dare look up at him, tears blurring my vision. “Maybe I did. But we can’t. And I told you,” I pause, giving myself one final second to rethink my decision. “I’m seeing someone.”

He snuffs his cigarette out on the wood railing then grasps my shoulder harshly, turning my body to face him. “If you’re going to lie to me, at least do it to my face.”

I drop my own cigarette from the sudden action, and he quickly stomps it out for me. My eyes widen at his words and his shift in demeanor. I blink up at him and shake my head. “I’m not lying.”

“Yes, you are.” He takes a step forward causing me to step backwards, closing me into the porch railing. His hand finds my jaw holding it firmly in place, analyzing me with furrowed brows. It runs an ice-cold shiver down my spine. “I can see it in your eyes. I can hear it in your voice.”

My chest rises and falls rapidly. “I am, seeing someone Nick. I’m happy.” I lie through my teeth even though it’s useless. 

“No, you’re not, Vallie.” His words are sharp and intentional. “Look at you.” He gestures over my body. “You’re shaking through a cigarette just because you’re standing next to me.” 

“God.” A tear slips down my cheek and I try to take a breath, but I feel even more suffocated than before. “Fuck, Nick.” I harshly push him away. I look between us and still for a moment before tears prickle my eyes. “I’m sorry, I can’t fucking do this.”

I rush past him, through the front door, and don’t stop running until I close my bedroom door behind me. I slump against it, sliding down until I’m sitting on the floor. The weight of everything crashes down on me, and I bury my face in my hands.

“FUCK,” I scream, the sound muffled by my palms to not be heard by anyone else. The tears come hard and fast, my shoulders shaking with each sob. I’ve never felt so vulnerable, so exposed. The pain is unbearable, and all I can do is cry.

Thankfully the boys had already gone to bed the night of me and Nick’s fight, so we didn’t have to answer any uncomfortable questions. I cried, got it out of my system, and isolated the emotions into a little folder I tucked into my heart, just as I did the last time. Although, I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t getting more and more difficult. Two weeks later, I’m still avoiding Nick, but I don’t act like a scrambling mouse any time he enters the room. Tensions have calmed down and it’s impressive how much can be hidden behind a mask. 

Today, I’m tearing the kitchen apart looking for a measuring cup, how they’ve made it this far without a measuring cup, I have no idea. 

As I’m bent over into a lower cabinet, I spot Nicholas in my peripheral. Obviously, he’s the one I’d been avoiding the most but the feeling was mutual, us rarely interacting with each other after movie night. We barely spoke to each other during meetings and avoided each other around the house. 

“Looking for something?” He asks with a bit of condescension in his tone. 

The comment immediately irritates me as I’d been hungrily searching for this goddamn utensil for the past half hour and all I fucking want are pancakes on my day off. I bite my tongue in order to not snap at him and back out of the cabinet, standing up. “Would you happen to know where a girl could find a goddamn measuring cup around here?” My irritated tone greatly outweighed Nick’s more subtle one.

His brows raised, shocked that I’d even speak that way, nonetheless to him. His brows didn’t stay up though, they fell rather quickly into thick, straight lines. The way his face turned cold so quickly made me shiver with a fear crawling up my back. “I know you’re not speaking to me that way in my own house.” 

Immediately, I want to rival it but try my best to stifle it down. However, the feeling was too strong. “I know you aren’t talking to me like that, period.” Crossing my arms over my chest and raising a brow at him. 

He steps towards me, “With work? Sure, I can play nice. Outside of work? I can talk to you however I want.” 

My brows furrow at his sudden hostility. Even though we’d been avoiding each other, things have been calm and professional. He’s never spoken to me like this before and while I’m used to dealing with intimidating industry men on my own, the darkness in his tone has my heart thumping in fear. For the sake of my self-respect, I square my shoulders and straighten my back. “Don’t fucking talk to me like that.” 

“Or what?” He provokes, stepping even closer to me. “You work for us, remember? You’re nothing more than a glorified assistant.” 

My jaw practically drops to the floor and red-hot anger rushes through my veins. I hear the smack first, ringing through the kitchen before I feel the static-y stinging in my palm. I gasp and bring my hands to my mouth while I watch him quickly reach for his reddening cheek. I instinctively want to apologize but, he deserved it. 

When his eyes return to mine, they’re the darkest gray I’ve ever seen them and the fearful thumping in my chest returns. He steps forward, backing me into the corner of the cabinets and the air in my lungs vacates when I look up to find his eyes burning holes in my body. My eyes widen at the sudden, unexpected action. “Nick.” I tremble out in the space between us. 

“You think you can just move in and run shit.” He taunts, his voice low and gravelly. “Haven’t even been in the house a month and you’re already acting up.” 

The fight or flight response in my body begs me to cry, to apologize and shove him away but the burning lava in my bloodstream demands otherwise. I clench my jaw matching the intensity of his stare. “I’m an adult Nicholas, I can do whatever the fuck I want in the home I pay to live in.” 

His hands land on the granite countertop at each side of my hips. “You have one hell of a fucking attitude today.”

The energy shifts into something slightly less aggressive and more sensual. As much as it should disgust me after all the shit he just pulled, it has my thighs pressing together. 

I cock my head at him, and in a tone that borders on innocent, I challenge him, “Yeah? And what are you gonna do about it?” 

His hand goes to touch my hip but stops short, stopping himself. We both know the lie I told him, but it seems like he might’ve actually believed it afterall. He lowered to just below my ear. “If I could, I’d make sure the only thing coming out of that bratty little mouth of yours are those pretty noises you make.” He whispers, his voice low and raspy.

His words went straight to my core, filling it with rampant buzzing. The war in my head waged between keeping up with my plan versus just giving into him like I always seem to do. However, it seemed as though the wetness pooling between my legs was winning.

I must’ve taken too long for him, long enough to crack his resolve just a bit. He pressed his forehead against mine, forcing my focus up to him. The look in his eyes had switched to something softer than before, if I didn’t know better, I’d say there was a hint of sadness in his crystal grey eyes. “Can I touch you?” He asks barely above a whisper and when I don’t answer immediately, he begs again. “I need to touch you, Val.” His voice carried what sounded like a deep desperation, and it all yanked at my heart - but guilt was a beast for a different time. 

Truth is, that I feel the same desperation as he does. I nod quickly against him, “Touch me.” I cave into him, like I always do. “Touch me, touch me, touch me.” I repeat softly before his lips clash into mine and his hands finally meet my hips, immediately pulling me onto the counter. As soon as the coolness of the granite meets my thighs, my eyes round at the realization that we’re in the kitchen. I pull away before he has a chance to deepen the kiss, “The others.” I breathe out urgently with wide eyes down at him.

He shakes his head quickly, “They’re out of the city for the day.” 

It could’ve been a bold face lie, but that’s all the reassurance I need to proceed on our poor decision. His tongue swipes across my bottom lip and I oblige faster than I’d like to admit. Our tongues find each other and begin to entwine themselves. He grasps my hips and pulls me to the edge of the counter to press himself against me. I can’t help but let out a tiny moan into his mouth at the feeling of his covered erection pressing into my clothed center. 

His hands trail up my sides to cup my cheeks before parting from me, “You feel what you do to me?” Soft but needy pants through parted lips fall on my own.

My heaving chest and my pathetic excuse for a nod was enough for him to rejoin our lips. I wrap my arms around his neck tugging him even closer. Our tongues fight for dominance but he’s winning, and his thumbs dig into my hip bones in an almost painful way, as if he’s scared I’ll vanish from his grasp. 

My fingers find their way into his hair that’s wrapped up in a loose bun and dig my nails into the roots, letting out a small sigh against his lips. He tastes like cigarettes and coffee in the best way.

I pull away for a moment and let my focus move from his lips back up to his eyes. My hands glide over the waistband of his jeans, dipping two fingers behind the zipper and pulling it towards my body. “I thought you had a lesson to teach me?”

A groan rumbles in the back of his throat as he processes my words. His fingers snap to my thighs, digging harshly into the flesh before spreading them apart as far as they’d allow. Warmth tinted my cheeks at the action, feeling exposed. I’m still clothed but now it’s just the thin fabric of my panties keeping the most intimate part of me covered. It’s not like it’s anything he hasn’t seen before, but it still feels vulnerable. 

“Tell me, what lesson do you think you need to learn?” He asks me while his fingertips urge my lower back to move further to the edge of the counter. 

“Hmm,” I feign thinking hard about the answer. “I think that you think it should be my mouth, but I don’t think that.”

“Oh, no?” He questions, “Is there anything you do that makes you think you deserve a lesson?”

“Nope.” I reply with cheery innocence. 

“That’s interesting, because you’re massively overdue for one.” He tugs my legs so close to him it almost pulls me off the counter. 

He leans down and presses a kiss just below my ear, then trails it down my neck. My heart beats so fast against my ribcage I fear it could burst. 

While his hands roam and grope anywhere they land, he’s buried in my neck sucking marks into it. “I’ve missed you.” He admits, mumbling against my skin and makes my heart rate skip a beat or two. 

I tilt my head back and scrunch my eyes closed. We shouldn’t be doing this in the first place, nonetheless, saying these sorts of things to each other, but it seems neither of us care enough to remember why. 

I tangle my fingers in his hair, giving it a gentle tug and nudging my head against his. “I’ve missed you too, Nicky.” 

He pauses the same way I did but this time he moves back up to rejoin our lips. 

There’s a couple words that linger in the back of my throat - words I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to tell him. Words that I’m not sure make sense for us or if they’re just the chemicals rushing through me. But I want to say them, and I’m scared that if I go to say anything at all they might tumble out. 

His hands find and tug at my shirt which I quickly pull away and discard it across the room. I take the opportunity to do the same with him. I catch the hem of his shirt, and he stills. I realize in the two times we’ve slept together, I’ve never seen him shirtless. That combined with the way he hesitated when I went to pull it off makes me think he might be uncomfortable. “May I?” 

He hesitates but nods and lets me be the one to pull it off him. He’s tattooed all over his chest just as he is on his arms, and it makes me want to go exploring all over his body. Our lips reunite and our tongues reconnect before I get a chance to compliment his appearance. I work quickly at undoing his jeans while he struggles to pull down my skirt.

Finally, bare to each other, he pulls me taut against him to make sure I can feel just how much he’s missed me. He nestles his thick shaft between my folds, and I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t missed that part of him too. I let a small whine slip into our kiss at the feeling of him throbbing against my clit. 

He disconnects from me only to press his forehead against mine, “I need to be inside you.” There’s a greater feeling behind his claim, more akin to ‘I need to be as close to you as possible’.

“I need you, please.” I reply, sounding more desperate than I would’ve liked. 

Now, not my brightest moment, letting him push his way inside me without more prep when I haven’t had him in so long. The stretch his girth brings is a delicious but brutal burn. He takes mercy on me by taking it slow and I feel every thick inch of him until he bottoms out, nuzzling the tip of his cock into my cervix.

“Fuck.” I breathe out, resting my head back on the cabinet. 

While it’s painful, it feels just like puzzle pieces reuniting, like he was made for me. He fills me completely, leaving no empty space.

He only stays stagnant for a short bit of time before he begins rutting into me. I remember how good he feels once adjusted to him. His head is tucked into the other side of my neck, littering it with more marks. He lets small grunts and groans tumble into my neck as he drills into me. With every thrust, his cock hits the bundle of nerves deep within my core and makes my skin burn. “God, you take me so fucking good.” He mutters beneath my ear and it makes me grip onto him tighter.

He detaches from my neck and unexpectedly places both hands on my cheeks, directing my gaze onto him. His hips slow but don’t halt as he forces me to focus on his stormy eyes. 

“Tell me it was a lie.” He demands, with a slight melancholic undertone.

I tilt my head a bit at the request, unsure of what he was referring to or why he’s bringing it up now. “What?”

“I know you lied to me, tell me it was a lie.” He pleads again, with more desperation this time. “Tell me there was no one else.” 

As I take a moment to process, he returns to his spot on my throat, pulling the skin of my neck between his teeth and one hand finding my swollen clit, rolling circles into it. My eyes widen at the feeling of both sensations at the same time, rapidly accelerating the proximity of my high. 

“Tell me you lied to me.” He repeats in a mumble beneath my ear. “Tell me there’s no one else. I need to hear it.”

My mind swirls between his words and the pleasure he’s giving me. It’s like some twisted tactic, that if he gets me so overwhelmed, I’d be forced to tell the truth - and it’s working. 

“I-“ I begin, going to ask how he ‘knows’ but I know I’m a terrible liar, especially to him. My peak rushes to where his fingertips meet my bundle of nerves and all I can think about is him. “I lied, Nick, I lied.” My fingernails dig into his back, and I squeeze my eyes shut, letting an ache wash through my chest.

I feel him smile against my skin and his speed picks up, ramming into my sweet spot over and over while working figure-8’s into my clit. 

“There’s only you.” I add, because I have nothing left to lose with the truth being out. “There’s only ever been you.”

He groans at the words and the way my walls involuntarily pulse around him. “Fuck.“ He grunts against my neck, his thrusts becoming erratic. “Fuck, I’m close. Cum with me?” 

I nod quickly as I’m on the precipice of my own high as well and ready to reach it with him. 

His thumb speeds up with the rolls of his hips pushing me over the edge. “Fuck I’m gonna, fuck,” Buzzing euphoria washes over me and blinds my vision as the coil in my belly snaps. It spreads burning heat across my body and only intensifies when I feel his cock twitch, spilling his hot release into the deepest part of me.

Our chests rise and fall quickly in time with each other and his breath brushes past my shoulder in short bursts. It feels so good to be so full of him.

Unexpectedly, he pulls back only to hold my face and pull me in for another kiss. This time, it’s sweet and soft and full of an emotion we haven’t spoken. Our tongues dance together but it’s slow and tender, the sort of kiss that bonds you and makes you feel safe. 

Once he detaches from me, his forehead presses into mine once more, meeting my eyes with his silver ones, this time having a faint blue hue. His thumbs brush along my cheekbones and his eyes dart across my face, “I don’t want to stop doing this, Vallie.” He whispers and it twists a knife in my chest.

I don’t want to stop either, I want to say. 

I reach up and wrap my arms around his neck pulling him closer. “Nick, we-”

“I know.” He says sadly, but with a slightly hopeful pitch. “The guys are coming around, nobody has to know but us five. I can wait, Val.” His voice pleads. “I can wait, I can wait until you’re ready, until we can. There’s something here, I know you feel it too, I can feel it. I just can’t do this anymore, it’s torture being around you.” His words accelerate as he speaks. “It takes everything in me not to touch you. I can’t be around you, let alone live with you and pretend that I don’t love you.” His eyes widen a bit at what he just blurted out. 

My own eyes round wide at him and my heart feels so full it could pop. “You… what?”

He closes his eyes, “I know that I shouldn’t.” His voice strained before meeting my gaze again. “But I do.” 

I blink up at him as he confirms the same words that have been swirling on the tip of my tongue. My hands slide down to hold his face. “I love you too, Nicholas.” I whisper in the space between us. 

“You do?” He asks, almost surprised though I can’t tell if it’s because I said it or because I mean it, maybe both.

“Yes. I love you, I love you,” My hands pull him closer as I repeat the words like a prayer; now that I’ve said them, I can’t stop. “I love you, I love you,” Before I can get to the fifth ‘I love you’ he wraps my legs around his hips and lifts me off the counter with him still inside me. He carries me into the living room and before I can question anything, we reach his intended destination. 

He lays me down on the couch - the same couch we got high on and ate Jolly Ranchers and ice cream. The couch where we first experienced each other’s bodies. It's not the couch where our love began but it is where it bloomed. 

Our lips rejoin immediately, getting swept up in our newly confessed love. I felt him hardening inside me again before we even left the kitchen. My arms wrap around his neck and my legs close in around his hips, trying to get him as close as possible.  

His hips begin to rut into me, gliding easily with his previous release still inside. It begins tender and slow but as with anything with Nick, it heats up quickly. He uses one hand to hook behind my knee pulling my hips up and closer to him and I let out a gasp at the new, deeper angle. His lips find my neck again, placing needy but tender open mouth kisses there. “I need you to feel how much I love you.”

My nails dig into his back at his words, “Fuck.” I moan out as his tip hits my g-spot directly in rapid succession with no reprieve. “Fuck, I love you.” 

“I love you too.” He says softly against my neck, pressing a gentle kiss there. “God, you feel fucking amazing.” It was like once we gave in and admitted to our feelings, it amplified the sex tenfold.

My head feels like it’s spinning when I nod in agreeance, desperately, “You fill me up so good, baby.” I let the name slip in the cloud of pleasure.

“Fuck, call me that again.” He nearly growls and lands one hard thrust flush against my hips.

It made my heart swell, thankful that he liked it, then had my walls pulsing around him in the realization that he really liked it.

“I love your fucking cock, baby.” I repeat the petname.

“Yeah?” He smirks, against my skin, “You like the way I stretch you out, angel?”

I flutter my eyes closed, feeling so complete in our surrender to one another, like this was how we were meant to be with each other from the beginning. It’s overwhelming how all of our suppressed words and feelings were all crashing into us at once. We broke open the floodgates and we were drowning in each other.

“God yes.” I dig my nails deeper into his flesh, feeling the daunting size of him trying to split me in two.

“Fuck, you take me so fucking good.” He mumbles in a low voice, and I feel myself clench as much as I can around his girth like I need to keep him there forever. He groans at the feeling, “Oh, you’re gonna make me cum if you keep that up.” His hand frantically finds my clit again, beginning tight circles into it.

My breath hitches in my throat and my eyes widen, that being the only thing I needed to send me into my second orgasm. He’s not far behind with hard, staggered thrusts chasing his own high.

Our climaxes arrive rapidly with the passionate expression of our love. For the second time that day, we hit our peaks together in unison, letting the confessions of our love fill the room. 

He practically falls and melts into me as our chests heave in time with each other. After a bit his eyes look down at me, still hazy with lust, now mixed with love. “It’s not enough.” He says hastily.

My brows furrow at his words, lifting myself up to my elbows as he slowly makes his way down my body. “What do you mean?”

He lands at my hips, spreading my legs apart. “I said that I need you to feel how much I love you. Fucking you with my cock isn’t enough.”

Before I can protest or inquire, his head is dipped between my thighs and his tongue is latched to my already-overstimulated clit.

“Oh, no, no, no.” My hand flies into his hair as I shake my head quickly. “No, Nick, I can’t – oh – not again,” I hiss at his blatant disregard and try to squirm away. “Fuck – It’s too much.”

He groans against me and his hand grip onto my hips stiffly, keeping me locked in place. “Stay fucking still.” He growls the demand without pulling his mouth away, every word sending a vibration through my body.

Every move of his tongue is intentional in a specific pattern, if I didn’t know better, I’d wonder if he was actually spelling out ‘I love you’. Regardless of that being factual or not, it doesn’t matter because it feels like he was writing loveletters with his tongue.

Every flick and swirl, sends a jolt through my entire being. My movements beneath his mouth can only be described as thrashing as my center is flooded with stimulation it wasn’t ready to receive again. It’s heavenly but almost painful at the same time. “Slower, please.” I beg but it’s futile; once Nick’s determined on something, its hard to convince him otherwise.

I tug at the roots of his hair and wriggle as much as I can with him keeping me in place. I’d felt my high creeping up, but I didn’t expect it to crash into me out of nowhere. It hits me all at once, my hips buck into him and my grip on his hair must be painful, but he doesn’t falter, not for a second. Silent screams ghost my throat as pleasure rips through me, violently. His tongue continues to roll at the perfect speed in all the right patterns, dragging out my high into the longest one I’ve ever had.

He finally tapers off of me and looks up at me through my parted legs. “I could do that all fucking day.”

I deflate into the cushions with a sigh, my ears still ringing from the overwhelming pleasure that just possessed my entire being. He kisses up my body, reaching up and planting a chaste kiss to the side of my mouth. “Was that too much?” He questions in a whisper.

I shake my head lazily, out of breath. “Perfect.” Is all I can get out.

The edge of his lips curl into a smirk. “I knew it would be.” And places a prideful kiss to my shoulder.

Once cleaned up, we laid on the couch together with me cuddled into his side and my head on his chest. The silence around us is both comforting and nerve wracking. The air is thick with fragility, like if one of us moves or speaks our bubble will burst. 

As we lie there, the quiet moments stretch out, and I can feel his heartbeat steady under my ear. It’s a rhythm that grounds me, making everything else fade away. His fingers trace gentle patterns on my arm, and I close my eyes, savoring the warmth of his touch. There’s a comforting sense of relief in surrendering completely to each other, finally. I’m not sure what this all means for us, but it feels good to finally admit it outloud. 

We stay like that for the rest of the night, enveloped in a bubble of shared intimacy. The outside world, with all its complications and uncertainties, feels distant and unimportant. Right now, we are just two people who have found comfort in each other’s arms. The complex reality and fragile hope for what might come next hangs in the air, but for now, they don’t need to be addressed. The uncertainty still lingers, but it’s softened by the honesty we’ve shared today. Tomorrow will bring its own set of challenges and questions, but in this moment, I allow myself to simply be with him, wholly. All that matters is the gentle rise and fall of his chest and the soft whisper of our breaths mingling in the quiet room. It’s enough to simply be together, a luxury we’ve denied ourselves of for so long—to find solace in the closeness and love that has always been there, begging to be acknowledged from the beginning.

Taglist; @ladyveronikawrites @persuasivus @kingdomof-omens @strawberryruffilo @the-hell-i-overcame @cncohshit @dominuslunae @thebadchic @to-be-written @myownthoughts12 @measuredingold [comment if you'd like to be tagged?]

A/N; The love for this story is something I never expected and I am truly grateful for it. Sorry that this took so long or if it's not up to par. I would love to hear your thoughts and predictions 👀 Thank you SO much for reading 💗

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Carpe Noctem 9

Warnings: dark elements, noncon, age gap, gaslighting, manipulation, other dark elements. Proceed with caution. (short!reader)

Note: Please let me know what you think as it helps me a lot with ideas and I love interacting with you all.

Part of The Club AU

You’re not sure what to do with yourself. You find the room with the silk tie on the handle and enter. You look around. Nothing special. A bed, a closet, a metal vanity with a round mirror, and a fluffy white rug. It’s all so minimalistically extra.

You put down your purse and keys and pace around aimlessly. You're really doing this. You're giving in. Or giving up. Whatever you want to call it.

You're tired of fighting. For years you did everything for Johnny, hoping something would be right. You only realise that now. You would tell yourself it's because you love him and you're just taking care of him, but really you were desperate for his approval.

Maybe it's just easier to be like Lloyd. To be unsentimental and crass. To not care about others or what they think. To just say what you want plainly and take it.

You're not that kind of person. You know that. And just because he's singled you out, it doesn't make this or you special. It's as basic as he says it is. Fuck, high five, move along.

You sit at the vanity and pull out an empty drawer. Restless, you check out the next one. There's nothing there. The place is as vacant as your life suddenly is.

You shut the last drawer and glance at your reflection. You look as tired as you feel. The swollenness is still there in your cheek and the skin still tender with bruises.

You peek behind your mirror image at the bed. You yawn as you stand up and cross to the mattress, spreading your arms wide as you fall onto it face first. You close your eyes, head heavy with fatigue but nerves too addled to sleep.

You let the last few days wash over you. Johnny's anger, the fear and humiliation, capped by Lloyd's salacious and repulsive offer. It's surreal and soul crushing.

You lose track of time, hovering between awake and sleeping. Each time you feel you might doze, your body gives a start, unable to relax in this strange place.

A sudden stinging slap reverberates across your ass and you roll over with a yipe. You push yourself up as you face Lloyd's smirking mustache. You sputter in shock as he winks at you.

"Hey, sweet cheeks, waiting on me?" He purrs.

"Jeez, what–"

"Don't look ready to me," he shakes his head, gripping one hip, "did you even see the gift basket I made up for you? I put time and effort into that. And I'm… me."

"Uh, well, uh, yeah," you say, shimmying to the edge.

"And what about the surprise in the bathroom? How about you go wash the motel off you and I'll get the place ready."

"Ready?"

"You know," he pokes the tip of his tongue out, "you like candles? Afraid I'm all out of rose petals."

"Uh, oh," you sniff, "I thought, maybe, I could settle in first–"

"Look pretty settled to me," he shrugs, "but if you're tired, you can just roll back over and I'll start from the rear–"

"Oh god."

"Come on. I'm trying. I brought some stuff," he points behind him and you see a tote beside the door frame, a floral bag you rarely got to use.

Fabric peeks out past the top and the top of your bedside lamp, the one with the scalloped shade. You don't really know why he took that. As much as he gives you the ick, you can't really say he's a total asshole.

"I also grabbed this," he turns and goes to the bag, pulling out the very bix that started all the chaos. He comes back to you and tosses it on the bed so the lid pops off. The pearl bustier peeks out beneath the tissue paper. "And it's not my size, so…"

He stares at you as you try to avoid his eyes. You reach to slide the box closer and exhale softly. May as well pull off the bandaid. If he's anything like Johnny, it won't take that much.

🍑

A long soak should be the only thing you could want. The prospect of after keeps you fron enjoy the water. The tension nestles deep and refuses to leave.

You wash, the bottle of untouched champagne on the counter. Another unwanted surprise. You're in no rush yet moving fast.

You recline and try to forget the circumstance. Try to be somewhere else, if only for a moment. You shudder out your anxiety and sit up to pull the plug.

You stand and dry off. Your stomach churns and your skin crawls. You fix your hair and go through your usual routine. Then you stop to examine the pearled strands that drape across the boning of the bustier.

It's awkward. You're not sure at first how to get into it. Then the panties. A thong of sheer fabric that seems to shimmer. Then the stockings, and garters. A bit much just for… that.

Your reflection moves in the mirror but you won't look at yourself. You near the door and try to hear through it. Is he even out there?

You twist the handle slowly and emerge into the dimmed room. The curtains are drawn and the lights are set low. There are candles lit, on the night stand and the white shelves built into the wall. The scent of vanilla mingles with something woodsy.

You don't see him but before you can turn, you feel him. He holds himself flush to your back. You out your hands on his forearms as he embraces you from behind. Be nuzzles the back of your head and takes a deep whiff. He hums as she wiggles his pelvis and urges you forward.

"You smell delicious," Lloyd growls as he walks you to the bed, "bet you taste even better."

[wastingawayinmyroom]

Ur my mutual and I love u sooo

ROMANTIC PRONGSFOOT HCS-

SCREAMING RN I WAS WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO ASK THIS

ROMANTIC PRONGSFOOT MY LOVELY LAB EXPERIMENTS (affectionate) WIUWNIUANIUWI

guys PLEASE for the love of god stop making james the most sunshiny person ever

like yeah that’s PART of his personality

but not the whole thing

romantic prongsfoot makes SO much sense bc james legit bullies people so sirius won’t be bored

like “sirius wants to do something? ok bet, my bff can’t be bored” SIR YOU’RE IN LOVE

GET THE LEGAL PAPERS PLAN THE WEDDING IDGAF

james is morally grey for sirius pass it on

that made no sense lmao

hc that sirius asked james for a hair tie once and james didn’t have it so he felt guilty and started carrying them around on his wrist 🥰🥰🥰

inspired by my boyfriend

anw it becomes a common sight for him to be braiding sirius’ hair or playing with or like just doing something with it

because ✨hair✨

in non aus they hex people together as dates

in aus they probably have sleepovers and write those outrageous “am i an asshole” things on reddit lmao

also sirius has an obsession with james’ eyelashes

because i said so 🥰🥰🥰

they’re the most full, beautiful things on earth

and paired up with the cute puppy eyes?

no wonder sirius does everything james asks

i love them so much wowohuww

warning nfsw - okok but they would have THE MOST intense sex ever

like i’m talking chest to chest or back to chest AT ALL TIMES

they literally cannot get enough of each other

no but imagine

them lying down together and sirius complaining about how he wants them to be closer

james: what do you want me to do be inside of you???

sirius: yes.

they’re so wiubakhbakjbiuaq

ok no more nfsw, now onto violence!

james considering himself a good person with morals (sir you BULLY people for FUN be so fr 🙄)

but the morals are just like “i won’t kill people but i’ll make them wanna kill themselves”

anw in comes sirius “fuck around and find out” black who just. goes with the flow

like “oh i injured someone? womp womp bitch lmao”

and he gets more and more obsessed with this boy who literally does not give a shit abt anything

until he’s washing blood off in the sink

and saying “it was for sirius, it had to be done” until it becomes a mantra

give me murder husbands prongsfoot!

ok no more warnings

soft prongsfoot

cuddles and gossip sessions in bed until 3am

bc come on

they besties

and whenever they’re without each other for more than an hour

they start like writing shitty letters and stuff like that

except they never send the letters

it’s like writing in a diary basically

and when one of them finds the other’s “love letters” (cheesy lmao) they tease the other mercilessly

bc

again

they besties

let them be besties

stop making one of them die and the other go to jail for 12 years for “killing” the other (which they didn’t do) and then the other dying

like please i want my happy smutty violent fluffy prongsfoot 😭😭😭

goodbye i need to sleep again (i’ve slept for 15 hours so far i’m trying to set a record)

[thelarriefics]

SPRING FIC REC: Below you will find fics that take place in spring, have a springy feel, etc. 

📖 always you (i should have known) by @28goldens (60k)

“Oi, now we’re talking. Came running to ol’ Tomlinson for help, gotta say Harold,” He crossed his arms over his chest, and Harry watched as his eyes looked him over. “It's very out of character for you.”

“Yeah, well, don’t feel too special, you're my last choice,” Harry subconsciously crossed his arms as well, giving Louis his own look over.

“Oh, that's a lot of power, I’m your last resort!” He wagged his finger at him, letting out a cackle. “Alright, hit me with it.”

Harry’s lips pursed as he slowly started to regret the words about to spill out of his mouth, “I want you to pretend to be my boyfriend.”

or the one where harry and louis cant stand each other and fake date to make someone jealous.

📖 (I'm Dreaming of a) One Night Inn by @lululawrence (54k)

When everything Louis had planned for his life falls through, and on his birthday no less, he's left with no other option but to regroup and start over again. The road of life isn't always straight and it certainly isn't always easy, but sometimes it's those twists and turns that find you your closest friends and—if you're really lucky—the love of your life.

Louis just happens to be very lucky.

A Holiday Inn AU.

📖 Blush by @dip-lou-in-honey (33k)

Harry is a young omega, presented at his first Royal ball, when he first meets Louis, the King. They're immediately infatuated with each other, but in the ancient hallways of the castle, whispers travel far and wide, and what they want is not what they're allowed to have.

📖 Tip Toe Through The Tulips by @peachbootylouis (27k)

Ever since moving to Manchester, it had just been Louis and his dog Clifford against the world though it had never felt like enough. It’s not until Clifford quite literally sniffs Harry out while on a walk that Louis realizes he’d been looking for someone like this flower child all along. A fluffy one shot filled with fur and flowers.

📖 To Begin Again by @chloehl10 (23k)

Harry’s ready to spend a fun Easter morning with his two children at the park, but it’s thrown into chaos when an over-excited dog and his owner come barrelling into their lives...

📖 Sakura Sunset by @mizzhydes (16k)

Harry and Louis have a tradition. Every spring they stand below hundreds of dazzling cherry blossom trees in Kew Garden, and year after year they come back to walk amongst the trees and experience that love over again.

This year everything changes. Louis is offered a once in a lifetime opportunity in Silicon Valley, California.

Only after Louis has left does Harry realise he made the biggest mistake of his life breaking up with Louis, and he has to live with the consequences of his actions.

Four years later, Harry discovers that Louis has returned to London, and in an effort to find the closure he desperately needs, he must tell Louis the truth behind their break up so he can move on with his life.

📖 The Prince and The YouTuber by @haztobegood (12k)

The Annual Rosendal Spring Gala hosted by the Royal Family is the most prestigious fundraiser in the country. When a problem with the honorary foundation arises, Crown Prince Louis Tomlinson must pick a new worthy foundation on short notice. He discovers the perfect replacement in an unlikely place, while watching his favorite YouTuber, Harrysparkles.

📖 Love You To Want Me by @rainbowsandlovehl (11k)

Niall coerces Louis into doing 'spring cleaning', which is basically cleaning their flat which leads to Louis finding the pair of braces he used to wear back in early Uni days. Harry, Niall's bandmate has a strange but visible reactions to the braces.

📖 Chubby Bunny by @littleroverlouis (2k)

Harry spends his Easter Sunday basking in the spring breeze while playing games with the smallest Tomlinsons, and a package of marshmallow Peeps.

Louis is stuck in a sweltering bunny costume for the enjoyment of all around him.

Harry offers him a chance to peel himself out of the costume and indulge in some of the fun.

📖 my lap is the best place for you to be by @bottomhaztoplou (1k)

Omegas, especially pregnant omegas, are expected to ride in their marriage partner's lap, usually on their knot, during carriage rides so as to minimise any jostling that may harm the pup.

Heavily pregnant in mid-April, Harry lifts his skirts and sinks down onto his waiting alpha, his body easily taking Louis inside himself.

[cherry-blossom-qf]

BEHOLD!! THE AU I'VE BEEN COOKING UP FOR MONTHS!!

DIGIMOM CODENAME: DREAMLAND!

Basic Story Info: Susie is the daughter of Max Haltmann, the CEO and founder of his own computer company. (kinda like the original Susie lol)

But on her 18th birthday, a bunch of Digimon came through a portal and kidnapped her father and half the employees of the company. And it's up to Susie to save her father from whatever evil Digimon is behind all of this.

Accompanying her as her digital partners are the first two friendly Digimon she met in the Digital World. Marxamon and Magomon. Two sneaky little scam artists that Susie saved from an angry mob.

Once they heard her story, they both (eventually) agreed to help Susie find her father and protect her from the dangers of the Digital World, with Susie mysteriously gaining a Digivice in the form of a wrist watch as a symbol of their friendship.

Together, the three of them traveled all across the Digital World, fighting battles, solving mysteries, exploring new areas, you get the idea.

-------

Info on Susie: A young girl from the city of [insert place in Japan that isn't effing Tokyo]. She's a headstrong go-getter and intelligent gal, who's a major tech wizard, finding comfort in machinery and modeling. She has a weakness to cute fluffy things and sweet treats. She's a huge "papa's girl", as her loving father is the best dad (and only parent) a girl could ask for. Which makes finding him even more important to her.

-------

Info on Marxamon: A silly little jester bat digimon that shares DNA with the Demon Lord of Gluttony, Beelzemon, and a childhood friend of Magomon. With a "gives no shits" attitude and a craving for mischief, Marxamon is always up for a good prank or two. His special move "Spiraling Scream" has been known to leave even the strongest of champions feeling dizzy and temporarily deaf.

His Champion evolution, Jecksmon, is no different. Growing bigger wings, longer legs, and an even bigger taste for mischief than before! Having the ability to create mirrored copies of himself with his special move "Mirror Dance", and shoots blasts of chaotic energy from his mouth with his other move "Soul Cannon", he truly becomes chaos reincarnated!

-------

Info on Magomon: A little bell-shape feline magician that shares DNA with the Demon Lord of Greed, Barbamon, and a childhood friend of Marxamon. Although somewhat timid, his cunning and clever nature shows no bounds, treating almost anything like a performance he must perfect. Shrouding his secrets in veils of lies that he swears to never unravel, as it might bring unwanted attention, (aka: this bitch's got MEGA TRAUMA and is keeping it all a secret). His special move "Gemtastic Bombs" has him throwing multiple bombs made of different types of gems, usually Sapphire, Ruby, and Emerald.

His Champion evolution, Galormon, gives him a huge confidence boost and some card tricks up his (metaphorical) sleeves! With the ability to spin around, creating a tornado of cards and fire with his special move "All-In-Spin" and sucking in enemies into his hat with his other special move "Hatter Hole", his performance on the battlefield makes this fancy Digimon a sight to behold!

----

The other evolutions are gonna be left a mystery for now, cuz I haven't drawn them yet, lol.

So yeah, I hope you like this new AU!! I worked my ass off to figure this stuff out, and I hope it was worth the wait!!! ^w^

[skyward-floored]

Blog intro! That I'm finally getting around to after several years lol.

Hi there! I’m Peggy, Sky Floor, Floor, Skyward, or Peg if you like.

Basically any variation of my username is fine.

I'm a Christian girl, muddling my way through life 👍

This is my Legend of Zelda/Linkeduniverse blog, the home of all my Zelda stuff I reblog and create. I’m a writer and random theory person mostly, but I also draw and reblog a lot of stuff, talk about the loz games, and bust out various insane AUs every so often. I also never shut up. sorry.

Writing tag is #writing from the floor

Talk tag is #rambles from the floor

And my ao3, Skyward_Arpeggio

I also make an effort to tag everything for easy organization and proper warnings, but I can't catch everything. I do my best though. Also no political discussions or NSFW asks, please. I try to keep this a light-hearted space, so please respect that.

I'm always willing to talk Zelda/Lu, and have an unhealthy amount of lore memorized, so don't be afraid to shoot me an ask if you wanna chat :D

Some of my projects and AUs I'm working on:

Linked Universe Incredibles AU, an semi-modern superhero au, where I basically dumped the lu boys into the Incredibles movie(s). If you're looking for family stuff, superpowers, and way too much angst, this is the au for you. You can find it under the tag: #incredibles au, and all the writing I've done for it under: #incredibles au fic. (also on ao3!)

Brethren in a Cradle, my longest-running and most intense plot-wise project (with the very slow updates 😭). The chain gain an unusual addition to their ranks, and somehow Wild is a dad now. Wait, all of them are. Oops. Link to the fic.

Hyrule Dragon Warriors, which is a hyrule warriors au in which Link's dad is Volga, and his mom is Impa. Yeah. Family drama. You can find it under: #hdw au. (also on ao3!)

I have two original Zelda stories I'm working on, one that I just call Lost AU, and the other Hero of Sages, or Berry Link. Lost is about a Link who's corrupted very early in the story, and Zelda setting out to save him and the kingdom. While Hero of Sages is about a Link who has six older sisters... who happen to be six of the seven maidens needed to bring back Ganon. You can find them respectively under #Lost and #hero of sages.

You can also find my own all the links from the games go on an adventure together au at the tag: #Courage of Ages. There isn't a whole lot posted on here about them, but I always love talking about my boys :)

I have much more than this though, AUs/projects and other stuff I’ve written, but I'm going to put it under the cut (...still under editing so it's messy and unfinished!)

The past three years I've participated in the whumptober challenge! I did half of 2021's for lu, and in 2022 and 2023 I did all 31 days for lu! You can find the list for 2021 here, the ones for 2022 here, and the 2023 ones here (or find them all on my ao3 (see above), as well as some ao3-only bonus scenes!).

Kitty Wind, which is exactly what it sounds like. Wind touches Twilight's crystal, and finds himself as... a cat. A tiny, fluffy, adorable little cat. Needless to say, he isn't thrilled. You can find it under #kitty wind or read the fic on ao3!

A Royal Castletown Wedding

Accidental Domestication

Scales and Gills, a collection of Mermaid Legend fics

The Twilight Turns (true form au),

Pup is only a oneshot for now, but I have more fics planned for this idea! Dark Link goes back in time, and after the chain when they're too small to defend themselves. Unfortunately for Dink, he doesn't bet on them having protectors in the form of their predecessors.

Many Courses of Love

Up in Arms

Botw Dark Link AU

Downfall IAU

other aus(?) you're probably forgetting some so check later girl

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

Okay, but Houndoom can mega evolve. So now I think Vaggie should get a pokemon that can also mega evolve, as a treat.

Basically I just think Vaggie having an Absol would really fit her. Not sure what second pokemon Charlie would have to even the numbers though.

No even numbers- Absol is THEIR shared custody pokemon child, started out as Charlie's ends up more firmly bonded to Vaggie but gods it took a while and

Ah. I've made this angsty with fluff somehow. and loooooong

tldr: AU where the absol is both the reason chaggie meet AND the forewarning of one of the worst days of their lives. It's also kinda the living representation of them and their dream of saving people who no one thinks can be saved, no matter how much ppl hate and put Chaggie down for it

Absol's disaster-sensing power horns and urge to warn ppl mean whenever a portal to hell opens up at least ONE of these usually flash-steps through while it's open. They end up gravitating to whatever lonely mountain-like places they can find in the rings of hell, BUT, each year they all try slipping in to Pride right before or during Extermination start so they can try warning the Sinner's there that something terrible is about to go down

Hellborn see them as guardians bc any hellborn still in Pride right before Extermination can catch an emergency ride out of there on any Absol who finds them-

buuuuuut Sinners, the ones the Absols are TRYING to help, hate them. The warning is useless since Sinners can't leave and they only ever see the mountain dwelling Absols in Pentagram city right before the worst day of anyone's lives start. Some Sinners take this anger out on the Absols if they can catch them- Lucifer's found the results a few times scattered along streets right before Extermination and every time he'd cry and rage and send what's left of the Absols to the Ars Goetia for burial somewhere nice while begging the Sins to guard the ways between the rings better so this doesn't happen. Some Absols still get through tho. Mainly the older and more experienced ones, wary ones who never tried helping directly and so never got grabbed and torn apart by furious, terrified Sinners

Charlie's always taken the hellborn view on Absols (cool protectors!) and loved seeing them in the city (so PRETTY and FLUFFY) even though she feels guilty about it, knowing what it means and how scared it makes her people in Pride (she's found the... remnants of some Absols too but... they came here to help, even though a city is a terrible place for them, and THAT'S what Chralie focuses on) (she does also try to shoo them out of Pride if she can though) (Sinners not letting her patch them up after surviving Extermination is bad enough, ending up bringing home a broken grey horn or scrap of bloody white fur on top of that...)

She gets it though. The whole thing is tragic but she gets why Sinners aren't happy seeing the Absols, she walks around seeing all the dead Sinners who maybe saw an Absol moments before getting killed and yeah, she gets it, if things were different... just another reason to figure out how to stop the Exterminations. Even if it means no more Absols have a reason to make the trip to Pride afterwards- she's rather never see another one again, no matter how beautiful they are or how seeing them come back year after year helps her grit her fangs and make her own trip onto hells streets too, picking up where they left off trying helping people.

Maybe she identifies with the Absols just a liiiiiiiiiittle bit and wishes one would stick around someday.

She was REALLY confused seeing one still in the city AFTER an extermination one year. Extra confused when it just stood there staring at her from the entrance of a random alleyway.

It looked old and grizzled, scarred horn and patches missing from it's fur probably from past attacks on it from Sinners, so it SHOULD have been really wary and run from her the moment Charlie got closer, but it didn't, it just stepped back (out of reach) and looked down into the alleyway and when Charlie looked too that's when SHE saw-

Charlie assumes Vaggie was on the point of dying or getting killed there in that alleyway and THAT'S why the Absol was hanging around. It's gone by the time Charlie comes back out supporting the injured Sinner dumpster lady, and Charlie doesn't think to mention it until a full year into knowing and living with Vaggie- not until the next extermination, when Charlie gets excited seeing the Absols (SHE OWES THEM SO MUCH NOW) (she has a FRIEND. and Vaggie is safe and healing and) (oh Charlie wishes she could meet that one scarred up Absol again and thank it)

Vaggie does NOT share Charlie's enthusiasm for the "disaster" pokemon

Which Charlie understands! Vaggie is a SINNER right? She says she saw an Absol right before her eye got cut out on Extermination day. It makes sense she wouldn't have good feelings for them! Charlie understands that!!!

Charlie has no idea. And Vaggie can't bring herself to explain

Exorcist usually never notice the Absols. Partly because most of the Absols are already out of Pride before Extermination starts, mostly bc the Exorcists are fully focused on gleefully exterminating as many Sinners as they can before time runs out, vying to top each other's kill counts and cut down the endless rising tide of hell to keep heaven safe for another year

But Vaggie noticed

Maybe she wouldn't if she was having more fun admiring her piles of dead, sinful souls, but she spent her time between kills looking for the next one and the next clean shot to take the Sinner out in one hit- Dragging things out was pointless and wasteful, it would just cut into her own kill count numbers and that's the only reason why she didn't main her prey first, she was just being Efficient- she felt like the damn Absols were always staring at her. Their white fur jumped out against the gory trash strewn dingy streets of hell and they didn't make sense next to all the city dwelling pokemon, the ones made or trash or feeding on electronic, ghost pokemon born from or haunting the Sinners in their afterlife, fighting types brought in as protection or to hunt other Sinners with, fire types that let an Exorcist know they were getting too close to residents of the rulers of hell and the threat of hellfire that settled around the Morningstars like mantling cloaks of danger and death- the odd normal urban pokemon, drawn to the most densely populated place in hell and a sign of the reason the Exorcist had to come down and soil their wings and blades here year after year

Vaggie had the time to spot the Absols and feel how WRONG it was seeing them there

The wrongness got even worse once she broke down and trying leaning about the pokemon back up in heaven- Because even though it's HEAVEN and every pokemon in creation can technically be found there, the Absols are RARE. Every time a portal to Earth opens up, a few of them slip through and escape to the mortal world. Why?

Finding out why made Vaggie's insides squirm. Absols sensed changes in the world around them- weather usually or earthquakes- and they didn't cause disasters but they felt compelled to WARN people of them, they left their mountain homes (or even the eternal perfection of heaven) to go where people were in danger (like Earth) and tried to give everyone there a chance to RUN, to escape, to save themselves

and what did it mean, then, that Vaggie was seeing them down in hell during Extermination?

Wiping out terrible evil souls wasn't... it wasn't the same thing as a storm or an earthquake or tsunami or flood. What Exorcists did was GOOD and RIGHT and JUST, they were protecting the souls up in heaven, they weren't, causing a disaster

The souls down in hell didn't count as people anymore. They didn't deserve mercy or a chance to save themselves from that one final death. So wHY were the Absols down there. Why were they watching her kill-

Vaggie does see an Absol right before her eye is cut out, but more honestly, she sees it right before she almost kills a crying cannibal child

She blames the damn scarred up Absol for that for a while. Her losing her eye and her wings and her halo and her spot up in heaven is all because that one stupid pokemon unsettled her and set her up to lose her nerve and everything else

If that's true tho, then it's also why she ended up meeting Charlie, and...

The Absol shows up again the day Vaggie decides to stay with Charlie for good, they day they really start planning the hotel together, the day so many things finally get set in motion and a little shiver runs through the crooked, off kilter foundations of creation

Charlie doesn't know she's got an Exorcist at her side, working to stop the Exterminations what used to be Vaggie's whole reason for being

All Charlie knows is that the scarred Absol who shows up looks SO much like Vaggie it makes Charlie SQUEAK while taking pictures, and the Absol doesn't run when she inches in closer (Vaggie talking her through it from a distance, just barely keeping Charlie's urge to rush in and hug the pokemon in check) (Vaggie who's helping her get close to the Absol even tho Vaggie still doesn't like them) (Vaggie, who Charlie's already had practice learning how to be patient and careful for, scarred up Vaggie who won't go into details about what she's been through but never stops showing just how much happier she is now with Charlie)

For the first time in her long long life Charlie gets to reach out and TOUCH an Absol. Carefully. Veeery slowly. The poor thing has clearly been through a lot but it looks at Charlie and holds still and Charlie tears up staring at this creature who's never stopped trying to help Charlie's people, no matter how much they hated it or hurt it

She gives the Absol a hug, and it's just as much for herself as for the Absol who stands there and let's her give it

When the Absol nuzzles Charlie's teary face Vaggie knows she's doomed. It's over. That damn pokemon who haunts her nightmares is gonna get led into Charlie's home and Charlie's life just like Vaggie was and Vaggie's gonna help with every step- from a DISTANCE- because anything that makes Charlie smile like that is worth every inch of pain it brings along the way

and okay yeah, maybe having an Absol around is soothing and satisfying to a woman like Vaggie who's always on the look out for problems BEFORE they happen and likes getting a heads up instead of blissfully running along until the problems smack them in the face (re: Charlie)

and alright FINE Vaggie and the stupid Absol DO look kinda alike now her hair is growing out, and Charlie getting an eyepatch matching Vaggie's for the Absol's also scarred and missing left eye is KINDA cute

and yes sure the Absol joins Vaggie on patrols of Charlie's home and then the hotel and is pretty much always sitting at her feet and Sinners shy away from her partly bc of it which she doesn't mind at all and she SHOULD bc Charlie sweetie this is the WORST pokemon to have hanging around if we're trying to get Sinners to come stay at the hotel the Absol makes it look like the hotel thing is DOOMED doesn't that bother you doesn't it ever both you having something (someone) around who keeps reminding you of how things will probably go bad (Vaggie at least tries to find ways to counter it but she has to say the bad out loud first) doesn't that wear you down or annoy you wouldn't this be easier without (Vaggie) a disaster pokemon looming over everything-

Whenever Vaggie brings these points up tho, Charlie just clings to her Absol and gets watery eyed and says it's NOT the Absol's FAULT if ppl don't understand it's way of trying to help them!! Pointing out disasters before they happen isn't the same as causing them!!!!

And Vaggie sighs (in relief) and reluctantly agrees (she's trying so hard the only way she can right now maybe that's good enough for now) and when the Absol sits next to her on the crows nest keeping watch over the hotel that night (keeping a watchful wary eye on heaven's light) maybe Vaggie reaches down to give the Absol some head and neck scratches and rub the old scars in a way Vaggie knows (from personal experience) helps them relax and feel a bit better for a while

They don't figure out WHY the Absol came to stay with them in the first place until years later.

They come back from that disaster meeting up in heaven and find out everyone at the hotel ALREADY knows something bad is coming, they've known since the moment Chaggie's Absol threw back it's head and started to mournfully sing, a sound even worse than the howling of Charlie's usually cheerful Houndoom who ends up shivering in a corner huddled under the protective tiny wings of its Pidove protector who keeps looking around frantically for The Danger and pecking frantically at everything else it can reach

(the hazbins know it's BAd when Charlie's Houndoom won't respond to Razzle and Dazzle smothering it with loving pets and Vaggie's Pidove ignores Razzle and Dazzle's desperately offered donut treats)

and.....

....in the rush to fortify the hotel and prepare for battle with heaven... with Vaggie busy doing weapon drills and Charlie beating hopeful songs of not dying into everyone's heads all hours of the day... no one notices the Absol follow Pentious and the Egg Bois around

(not until After, anyway)

[jacenotjason]

How would the opposite neighborhood react to seeing their original selfs?

i wanna draw this, but im gonna jot my thoughts down real quick!!

(Here’s the AU masterpost!)

Also doodles!!

They try their best to find something they have in common. I feel like OG Eddie is way to nice to be scared or like grossed out by Opposite, he’d just feel a little bad and wanna be his friend.

They talk about Frank, they have that in common. Like:

OG: …uhm.. arts and crafts?

OP: I’m not five? What about sports?

OG: I can’t follow along with all that..

OP: eugh… mm…

OG: …

OP: ..Frank?

OG: Frank!!

OP: Frank!

Oh they would hate each other. OG would be trying to be nice and then Opposite would insult his business model, and then they fight. I lowkey wanna see these two brawl, I think opposite would kick OGs ass no offense.

OP: *looking around OGs store* Where’s your price tags? The unlabeled scam is scummy, even for me.

OG: Hm? Oh, buddy, I don’t charge money for my products!

OP: … What?

OG: Yah! I prefer accepting other meanings of payment! Things much more valuable then money, friend!

OP: … That’s dumb.

OG: 🙂 what.

Then they BRAWL!! Ok probably not OG howdy probably doesn’t resort to violence. But a lot of insults are thrown back n forth hueurheye-

I honestly think they’d love each other. OP is basically Franny, and OG is OP.Franny they’d literally just:

OG&OP, at the same time: You look like my sister!!

Plus they both love fashion, and hair, and makeup, and Sally- ohmygod theyd be the best of friends i cant even theyd be so girlboss together

OG teaches her some games, and then OP teaches her some girlboss survival skills. Before they leave, OP gives her a pink sparkly pocket knife to remember her by :3

Yknow that fancy rich ppl thing ppl do where they kiss each others cheek? They do that

OG: My dear! Won’t you let me in? I’m you, you can trust me!

OP: what in gods name makes you think I trust myself..?

OG: We are one in the same, starlight! I am you, you are me! A mirrored doppelgänger of your own image! I don’t look to harm you, starlight! Put aside your distrust.. for yourself?

OP: haha… okay, shakesqueer…

Then OP lets her in :3

I have lots of thoughts about these two hanging out. OG makes her a new outfit after judging her gross clothes, lightheartedly ofc and OP is like “haha yeah its gross” and OP gets a cute dress! OP absolutely shocks and destroys OG in video games, they dance together, and they talk about Julie huehuehuehue

WAHHH THESE TWO! I honestly feel like theyd get along, but have little bickering about their different mothering styles.

OG: a.. punk mother? Interesting..

OP: whaat? My kids are all party animals, just like me! I can’t contain that.

OG: haha that’s fair.. I guess.. but.. partying? Thats so… much..

OP: …dude unclench your beak and live a little.

Someone calls OP Ma and OG is like “Ma? Thats so sweet.. i wish my neighbors called me mom :>..”

OG: a dog wearin’ pants? That ain’t right.

OP: aah.. it’s just.. to walk around half naked, is that not discomfiting?

OG: Discomfiting?? Thats a big ol’ word for a big ol’ dog.

OP: Ahaha… I’ve got a bit of a considerable vocabulary.

OG: you got a word-a-day calendar or somethin?

I feel like they’d be friends? Maybe?? OG kinda pokes fun at OP and OP is like “I’m talking to my opposite self :) dimension plane is real :) ain’t that wild :)”

OG: …

OP: .. :3

OG: …I have questions

OP: :D

OG: why the turtleneck?

OP: its like a shirt is giving my neck a hug! :D

OG: …ok. Why the hair?

OP: fluffy! :D

OG: no why is it white?

OP: I bleached it :D

OG: why?

OP: preti :D