terristre · 2 years ago
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I saw requests were open! Can i ask for Ace and Deuce balancing random objects on a sleeping Leona lmaoooo
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dads be like "im just resting my eyes"
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gibbearish · 1 year ago
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best thing abt t is that i have worked out 0% more than before if not less and yet i now randomly get ppl going like "omg that looks so heavy do you need any help do you wanna set that down????"
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buckyalpine · 10 months ago
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Hi!!!! I love your work and talent, you are so amazing!💗 I was wondering if you could do a light angst fic. Like bucky is a player who is just running through women, and the avenger reader has a big crush on him . She has to watch him string girls through the tower all the time and it makes her sad. Bucky's type is dark,red lip, baddie but reader is the mom of the friend group and wears pink and is super sweet and a little awkward, she is also a mutant who has like earth powers. So whenever she's happy or laughing flowers will bloom in her hair. She's so cute. Kinda like the trope: she fell first but he fell harder. And like bucky realizes that he's madly in love with our sweet baby angel reader. And the FLUFF!! 💗💗💗
Thank you, love Binks 💖
Yes. Yesyesyes. I hope you're all ready cause I sat with this piece for weeks. Jealously, Misunderstandings, love sick Bucky, idiots in love, SO MUCH ANGST AND FLUFF . Protective best friend Steve and dash of smut cause I can't help myself, its so sweet and soft and I love these two, put myself in my feelings with their spicy and sweet loving.
-
"See you later Sargent" A gorgeous woman walked by the kitchen on her way out or the tower, winking over her shoulder and blowing a kiss to the soldier who smirked at her in response. Her lipstick hadn't budged even after a night of who knows what with Bucky, her perfectly curved hips swaying along with the click of her heels.
You were busy with making breakfast, dustings of flour covering your nose and cheeks, still in your baby pink pj's, looking the total opposite of the gorgeous girl Bucky spent the night with.
"Damn Barnes" Tony whistled after the she had left, clapping a hand on his shoulder, "Where do you find em'-Ow!" Tony yelped when Nat gave his ear a flick, cocking her eyebrow up in amusement.
"I'll let Pepper know you're curious-
"Nope. No. I was just admiring Terminators taste" Tony threw his hands up, swiping a hot pancake from the stack you were plating making you giggle, tiny daisies blooming around your hair "These are delicious Petal. I'll never get tired of seeing that" Tony smiled, looking at the fresh little flowers that reflected your mood, pressing a kiss to the top of your head before returning to the lab.
"Sure, admiring taste" Nat snorted while Bucky snickered, taking a seat at the kitchen island; his fluffy hair still messy from bed. You set down a plate in front of him, adding butter and some fresh strawberries on the side just the way he liked.
"Here you go Sargent" You smiled softly before getting started on cutting up more fruit for Steve and Sam who would be returning from their run soon.
"These are amazing" Bucky hummed, reaching for more; he'd never get tired of your cooking. You tried to bite back a smile while vines of baby pink roses weaved their way through your hair, matching the fuzzy feeling the soldier made you feel. The flowers were not missed by Bucky who watched you continue to flit about the kitchen like a little garden fairy, making sure everyone would have something for breakfast. He couldn't help but chuckle at the way you crawled up onto the counters like a cat to reach the highest shelves, a few knotty tendrils sneaking their way through your hair indicating your frustrations when you nearly dropped a cup.
"Do you have different flowers for different moods?" Bucky continued to watch you while you slinked off the counter, starting on a smoothie.
"Sort of? Yeah I guess" You thought to yourself, noting you'd often have yellow ones when you'd laugh, or purple ones when you were excited. You only ever got pink ones around Bucky; the only person to make you feel warm and shy and soft. You were caught off guard the first time you saw the tiny pink buds in your hair the same day you met him when you joined the team. No one else seemed to notice, too busy admiring the fact that gorgeous petals decorated your hair.
Everyone except Bucky.
The soldier was trained to notice everything.
He'd seen every type of flower adorn your hair but these ones were just around him.
"What do the little pink roses mean you're feeling?" Bucky asked, cocking his head when you looked at him like a deer in headlights.
Shit.
"It-I-happy! It means I'm happy" You stuttered out unconvincingly while Bucky hummed, cleaning off his plate before heading down to the gym, taking one last glance over his shoulder before rounding the corner.
Those tiny pink roses suited you perfectly; the human embodiment of a little fairy.
Ever since you'd joined the team, they were blessed with a full breakfast almost every morning, sometimes even dinner. Outside of your role as an Avenger, you took on a nurturing role within the team and of course that was just who you were, being so in tune with nature and naturally caring for those around you. Still, it was evident you went above and beyond just instinct when it came to taking care of others; you were very much the mom of the group. Initially Bucky found it confusing, wondering why you were so nice to everyone, always checking on their needs and being prepared for just about anything. He was so used to functioning on his own, he found it jarring when you were looking out for him too; didn't you know who he was? Why were you being nice to him?
He didn't even have it in him to give you the cold shoulder like he did with everyone else. What kind of person would he be if he was rude to the sweetest person he'd ever met. You were just so precious and sweet and you always smelled like fresh flowers and sunshine, he would've basked under your light for hours on end if you let him-
Bucky shook his head, breaking away from the train of thoughts he was having about you yet again. You didn't make sense. More specifically, him thinking of you didn't make sense. He was rough, rugged, made of muscle and metal, didn't like most people and the last time he'd been nurturing was back when he'd nurse Steve back to health more than 70 years ago.
You on the other hand were literally made of flowers, combined with soft sweetness, shy smiles and giggles. You were cute. Too cute. He had no business thinking about you, ignoring the fluttery jitter in his heart as he tossed a wink to a SHIELD agent who was training at the weights. She had joined recently, typically taking on missions which required her to go under cover in skin tight dresses and bodysuits; it was perfect for her given her tall and toned build. The woman smirked in response, biting her dark red painted lip before making her way over to him by the punching bags.
"Hey Sarge" she purred, bringing her hand up to toy with his dogtags, tugging at them suggestively, "Busy tonight?"
"We're having a movie thing" Bucky shrugged, not suggesting they had to do anything else after but if that's where the night led then-
"Hmm, I'll see you later then" She batted her lashes at him before going back to her set.
This made sense.
Casual. Sexy. Flirty.
Everything Bucky was good at and comfortable with. No feelings, no attachments. No deep, undying love he felt for a certain sweet girl on his team that he'd give his life for.
This made perfect sense.
-
You were the last to make it down to movie night after spending most of the evening prepping drinks and snacks for others. Movie nights were rare and it was even more rare for everyone to be present. You made sure there was something for each member of the team, from sour candy to chocolate, chips, cookies, tiny sandwiches and an array of drinks you'd set up on the coffee table.
You stood at the edge of the living room dressed in your warm oversized sweater and mismatched fluffy socks, nervously peering around the room for an empty space; usually you'd curl up on the two seater sofa with a thick fuzzy blanket draped over you but-
Your heart sank seeing yet another beautiful girl cuddled up next to Bucky, taking up all the space on the couch. A part of you contemplated on going back to your room; the sinking feeling in your stomach worsened seeing the new agent adjust herself until she was pressed right against the soldier. Why did you have to fall for for the person who wouldn't look at you twice. You were dressed in clothes too big and soft, a stark contrast to the matching silk lounge set she was wearing, leaving no doubt over how absolutely perfect her body was.
"Hey Petal, c'mere" Steve noticed you looking for a spot, patting he seat beside him, shifting over so you could join. You smiled at the Captain, quietly shuffling through the room, hiding into the cushions as the movie started. Your heart dropped further each time you heard the girl Bucky was with giggle, slinking around his lap while he gave her his flirty smirk. There were occasional times where flowers wouldn't bloom in your hair and this was one of them.
Steve noticed your less than enthusiastic demeanor, catching you glancing over at the brunette super soldier and his friend for the night, internally rolling his eyes at what an idiot his best friend was. He threw his arm around you, pulling you in to snuggle with him, whispering his own commentary as the movie progressed, hoping to lighten your mood.
You giggled, a few yellow flowers blossoming in your hair making Steve grin. Bucky watched carefully, a new emotion flaring in his chest as he watched bright petals fall onto your lap each time you laughed. He didn't like the new feeling that started off as warm to blazing hot, what was it he was even feeling-
Irritation? Sure a bit.
Confusion? Most certainly but not quite.
Jealously.
That's what he was feeling. He wanted to be the one who caused gorgeous tendrils of flowers to bloom, the one to make you giggle and laugh, the one who got to snuggle up with you. He was envious over how lucky Steve was, getting to cuddle up with such a soft bunny, his jealously momentarily interrupted when he took a moment to look at what you were wearing.
You looked so comfy with your warm sweater, your feet nice and toasty with your favorite socks. Bucky remembered you talking to him about them once, reading socks you'd called them.
"They're super soft and warm!" you grinned, clutching them to your chest after a trip to a book store. "I've been wanting a pair for ages. I finally caved and got them, I can't wait to put them on"
Bucky remembered chuckling to himself over how excited you'd gotten over a pair of socks, a few buds of lavender poking through your hair from how relaxed and calm they made you feel.
You looked so soft to cuddle up with like a little bear he'd hold to his chest, one that would protect him and keep him warm and safe. He wished he had a spot beside him because you would've sat where you always do and it would be him with his arm around you instead of Steve. He didn't want anything else. He shifted uncomfortably, trying to create some distance between himself and the agent, her close proximity suddenly feelings much to hot. She frowned, feeling him pull back, scooting over till she was cuddled up with him again.
Great.
"Did you want me to grab you something?" Steve asked you as he reached over for some chips, popping a few into his mouth. Before you could respond, you saw the woman whisper something in Bucky's ear, winking playfully before sitting up and taking his hand, the both of them leaving the movie half way. You felt like throwing up knowing he was taking her to his bedroom though you knew you had no right to be upset. He wasn't yours and he was welcome to do as he pleased though that didn't make the pain go away.
Bucky's POV
"How about it Sarge" She moved her hand up his thigh, giving it a squeeze, not bothering to wait for the movie to finish. Bucky stared at her like a deer in headlights while she cocked her head waiting for a response. Bucky glanced over to you, his heart breaking seeing your face fall. "Bucky? Are you listening to me?"
Bucky blinked realizing he was paying attention to you, mumbling an apology before turning to the agent. He didn't know who he was fooling but it was getting embarrassing, especially when he knew Steve was glaring at him from across the room. Neither of them had to open their mouths to understand the silent conversation they were having through their eyes alone.
"You're an idiot"
"Shut up"
"You know you like her"
"I-I don't..."
"Then why do you keep glaring at me like I stole your girl punk"
"Don't worry about it"
"You better figure it out before you hurt her more"
"She likes me?"
"You're an idiot"
"Jerk"
That did it. Bucky couldn't' last another second seeing your petals fall, the flowers Steve brought all retreating away and he couldn't sworn he saw you blink back tears. He couldn't keep doing this.
"Um, yeah sure" Bucky nodded, leading the woman away, walking past the elevators and towards the compound exist instead. As soon as he'd told the new agent he just couldn't do it he ran back to the living room in hopes of finding you only to find your spot empty.
You did your best to bite down on your trembling lip but it didn't work. As soon as the first whimper slipped out, Steve hugged you softly, telling you to to go to your room. You looked at him through wet lashes, his soft blue eyes filled with understanding. You rushed straight to your room, zooming right past Bucky's hoping you wouldn't have to hear anything, curling up into a ball in your bed where you wept under the covers.
Why did you fall for him?
Bucky looked over to Steve who nodded towards the elevators that took you to your floor, the super soldier wasting no time pressing the button to the 4th floor. He was at your door as soon as the elevator dinged open, softly knocking while his stomach continued to churn.
What would you think of him.
Why didn't he just accept his feelings the second he fell in love with those pretty little pink roses?
God you probably hated him now.
Bucky nervously chewed his lip,
"Petal?" Bucky called for you, hoping you'd open the door, his his heart hammering against his chest hearing soft sniffles from the other side of the door. "Petal, can you open the door sweets?"
He heard you continue to softly cry, his body working before his mind could catch up as he let himself into your room. He hated the sight of the little ball buried under a pile of blankets, hiding away from the world with a broken heart because of him. He made his way to your bed, sitting on the edge, petting the blanket gently to let you know he was there.
"Bucky?" You shuffled some of the blanket off, surprised to see him there, what was he doing in your room? Wasn't he spending the night with the girl he'd brought? Why did he look so distraught? You sat up with concern, looking him over to see if he was hurt because why was he here with you when he should be with her?
"Did-did you need something, is everything okay?" You tried to keep you voice steady, quickly wiping away your tears and forcing a smile that didn't quite meet your eyes.
"No sweet girl, everything isn't okay" Bucky whispered, smiling at your confused pout, his hand coming up to brush some of the strands of hair that were near your forehead. He let his hand linger on your cheek, wiping away your wet cheeks with his thumb before sitting closer to you. "Why were you crying"
You averted your eyes as soon as he asked the question, staring at your lap instead, playing with your fingers. Your voice was caught in your throat, shrugging as if you didn't know the answer. Bucky was surprised with himself, equally shy to actually say anything even though he wanted to pour his heart out. With others the smooth talking, the flirting, the boyish smirks came easy.
Not with you.
Not with his little fairy.
"Y/n, please" He tilted your chin to meet his puppy like eyes, hoping you'd understand how he felt without saying anything. His innocent gaze caused your cheeks to heat up, feeling his rough calloused hands touching you so softly. You bit your lip as your hair betrayed you, pink petals starting to decorate your hair.
"What do the little pink roses mean?" He whispered with hope in his voice, his heart aching with need seeing your shy smile, "Please tell me pretty girl. I- I only see them when I'm around you"
"It-it means-" you hesitated, scared this would all come crashing and burning if you told him the truth. Maybe he was just being nice, pausing his date to check on you. Or maybe-Just maybe? "I like you"
Had he not had super hearing Bucky would've missed your near silent whisper. The blush on his cheeks matched the flowers in your hair as he reached out for you, pulling you to his chest.
"C'mere my precious little petal" Bucky cooed, scooping you in his arms. You squeaked in surprised before giggling into his chest, the sound making Bucky's heart swell. "There she is" He smiled against your hair seeing little buds blooming again, the tiny pink roses he loved so much sprouting to life.
"Don't you have a date" You asked hesitantly while Bucky shook his head, holding onto you tighter.
"You should've been my date petal, m'sorry for not telling you how I felt about you earlier. I was scared"
"Scared?" You cupped his scruffy cheek, letting your thumb stroke his beard while he nodded, leaning into your touch.
"Scared I wasn't right for you. It didn't feel right falling in love with someone so precious when you're the complete opposite of me" His confession caused stray tears to slip down your cheeks while Bucky kissed them away. "But I promise, if you'd let me have you, I'd take care of you and love you with my whole heart. I promise I'd never hurt you sweets, I've fallen so hard for you, there's no one else I'd rather be with"
You couldn't help yourself, pulling him down for a kiss, giggling at the surprised squeak he let out before groaning and melting into your sweetness.
"I'm yours Jamie"
Stop here if the fluff was enough. Cause next is their sweet love making.
I know it's not part of the ask but imagine their first night together where Bucky doesn't want to over step so he doesn't make a move. He notices you being more cuddly and shy, burrowing into him when you're in his room and that's when he sees gorgeous deep red roses blooming in your hair. He knows by now how to read your mood based on your flowers but he hadn't seen this before.
"Petal?"
"What is it Buck" You look at him with wide doe eyes, hoping he doesn't feel the the heat you feel radiating through your body. You need him. It's more than just physical; you need him as close as possible in the most intimate way because you adore him so much.
"Your hair sweet girl" He runs his fingers through your hair, stroking the velvety petals making you whine from sensitivity, immediately silencing yourself from embarrassment. "What do you need love, you can tell me"
"Need you closer" You whispered, nuzzling your face into his neck where you could breathe in his cologne and a scent that was distinctly him.
"Closer how baby, you're-" It takes a moment for the pieces to click for Bucky to figure out just how much closer you need him, moving his hands to your hips, rubbing them up and down. "oh. OH. Is that all baby? Need me extra close?"
You nodded with another whine while Bucky moved you to lay against his pillows before slowly undressing you until you were both bare with nothing separating you.
"Bucky please, just-just want you" On any other night, you'd allow him to tease and toy with your body but you needed him so badly, your body throbbing, feeling more empty than ever.
"Shhh, m'here baby, it's okay, breathe for me petal, okay?" He stroked your hair while rubbing his weeping tip through your folds gathering your slick before pressing his cockhead against your entrance, "m'right here"
You both gasped at the feeling of him pushing his length inside, his movements slow until he was buried to the hilt. Your pussy quivered trying to pull him in deeper, tears welling along your lash line as he started to move, hardly pulling out, keeping his cock deep inside you.
"Look at these pretty roses" Bucky whispered against your lips as he rocked his hips, his hands laced with yours while more flowers bloomed, your legs moving to wrap tightly around his waist.
"All-all just for you Bucky" You hiccupped with pleasure between moans feeling a different level of satisfaction with him inside you. You finally felt complete as he moved faster, clinging onto him so you'd feel his full body weight lay on you. "More-I-I need more"
You'd never felt like this before, your powers starting to manifest throughout the room as you grew closer and closer to your orgasm. Dark green stems crawled up the bed posts as he fucked you harder, your gorgeous floral scent sending Bucky into over drive. He was the only one who'd make you feel like this, the only person to ever get to see those dark red petals strewn across his bed.
There was something so intimate knowing no one else would ever get to see you like this, no one else would smell how sweet you were when he drove you mad with pleasure.
All the dark red roses full of love and lust just for him.
"I'll give you more pretty girl" Bucky growled, his own high licking down his spine feeling your pussy tighten around him, begging for him to keep going.
"Don't-please don't stop" you begged, clawing at his back, "I-I'm gonna-"
"Cum baby, cum for me petal, give it to me" He pleaded right back, sweat beading at his forehead, his pace growing sloppy. Your back arched off the bed as he reached to rub your sensitive bud sending your nerves into over drive. "OH BUCKY"
As soon as he felt your pussy clamp around his cock as you cried out in pleasure Bucky moaned loudly, tucking his face into your neck as he spilled into you.
"Take it love, t-take it" He stuttered, trembling as the last of his orgasm dribbled into you. He watched in awe as the deep red petals that previously covered the room disappeared into thin hair, his classic favorite little pink roses decorating your hair once more. Bucky pulled the sheets over you both, holding you to his chest while kissing your forehead at you closed your eyes.
"Sleep tight, petal"
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htchnr · 2 months ago
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♰ too late to turn back now ༻ L. HOWLETT.*ೃ˚
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✮ꜜ masterlist. ✮ꜜ buy me a ko-fi!
content warning tooth rotting fluff ⋆ like fr it's disgusting how cute these two are ⋆ unmentioned age gap ⋆ r in her 20s ⋆ if i missed anything, lmk!
pairing neighbor!old man Logan.
summary sweet moments the morning after your first time together. written with 'Too Late To Turn Back Now' by Cornelius Brothers and Sister Rose! give it a listen for those sweet, sappy romantic vibes ;3 wordcount 0,9k.
authors note if y'all want, i can turn this into a small series, with little things that happen over time between these two 🤭 (please, PLEASE send requests for this, i'd love nothing more than more ideas and your thoughts) neighbor!Logan's got a cute cat in this series, (not mentioned yet in this fic) :3
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© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 𝐇𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐍𝐑. 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦, 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫!
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soft tunes flow through your apartment as you stand at the stove, deftly flipping bacon pancakes in the pan. the windows are open, fresh air mixing with the thick smell of the pancakes.
Logan grunts as he shifts in your bed, face nuzzling against your pillows as he breathes in the comforting smell of your perfume and your scent.
he misses being wrapped in your scent when he gets up and out of bed, making his way to the doorway leading to the kitchen. he leans against the frame, watching you sway your hips as you quietly sing along to the music coming from your record player. he smiles as he watches your figure move, his shirt from last night covering you.
— SINCE I MET THIS LITTLE WOMAN, I BELIEVE IT'S HAPPENED TO ME.
his heart throbs at the lyrics, he knows it's one of the records he gave you a few weeks ago as a 'thank you' for watching his cat— he claimed he had them 'just laying around', but both of you knew better.
— IT'S TOO LATE TO TURN BACK NOW, I BELIEVE, I BELIEVE, I BELIEVE I'M FALLING IN LOVE.
you turn around, moving to grab the large plate you were stacking the pancakes on when you spot him. your eyes widen and you jump a little as you lay your eyes on him— oh he looks too fine. boxers hugging his hips, that broad, hairy and scarred chest on full display.
" hey! hope i didn't wake you with the music. " you sheepishly smile, " m'sorry, it's a routine of mine. " you laugh as you turn back to scooping pancakes onto the plate.
he knows it's a routine, he eagerly listens for the sweet sound of your music each morning from the other side of the large wall separating your apartments. but you don't have to know that.
" don't worry 'bout it, doll. there'r worse ways to wake up. " he smiles. god, his smile.
you smile to yourself, turning away from him to hide your blush as you focus on the last batch of pancakes. you gasp as his big hands smooth over your hips, gently swaying with you to the music.
— AND THERE'S NOTHING THAT I CAN DO, IT'S TOO LATE TO TURN BACK NOW.
he smiles against your hair, it is too late, he thinks to himself. with the way his heart clenches each time he hears you play one of the records he gave you, or when he smells your perfume waft over through his window as you water your plants— he knows he's caught it hard.
— TELL YOU, I CAN'T SLEEP AT NIGHT, FOR WANTING TO HOLD HER TIGHT.
but with the way you're laughing against him as you two sway to the music, trying to focus on not burning the pancakes— he lets his feelings wash over him in pleasant waves. it is indeed, 'too late to turn back now'.
" so, d'you want syrup with 'em? " your syrupy sweet voice pulls him out of his train of thoughts.
he blinks, before pressing a kiss to the top of your head. " you're going to mix syrup with bacon pancakes? " he pokes, moving to take both plates of food from you with ease as he sets them on the table.
you laugh, a sound so sweet to him, he won't ever need extra sugar on anything as long as you're around. " oh, honey, " you grin teasingly, setting down a big jug of syrup on the table as you sit next to him. " i promise you'll love it. " you wink, pouring a generous amount over your stack of pancakes.
he hums, savoring the way you call him 'honey'. he watches you cut off a large bite with your fork, holding your hand beneath the dripping pieces, " c'mon, try it. " you grin.
he sighs with a smile, leaning forward to bite off the pieces from your fork. you giggle as some syrup drips onto his beard, leaning over to swipe it away with your thumb and suck off the sweetness.
Logan watches the action with darkening eyes, as you lick off the remainder of the syrup that dripped from the bite you offered him.
— IT'S TOO LATE TO TURN BACK NOW, I BELIEVE, I BELIEVE, I BELIEVE I'M FALLING IN LOVE.
it's safe to say, he's taken a strong liking to bacon pancakes drenched in syrup.
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fernsnailz · 1 year ago
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it's time... for the TEAM DARK FEST! 💥💥💥💥
me and @serpentineshine are hosting a little tournament to finally determine who the best Team Dark member is! this week there's gonna be goofs, bits, and even a special prize for the winner 👀
however, the most important prize of all is what awaits at the end of the festival! ...but that's a secret right now.
💥 cast your vote below! 💥
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(oh also if anyone makes any propaganda for their fav character. tag me i wanna see)
video transcript below the cut! ⬇️
A blue announcement screen with scrolling text reads “SPECIAL FENSNAILZ ANNOUNCEMENT.” There’s a looping animation of Squeak the cat in the middle. It disappears, cutting to a shot of a studio space.
In the studio, SNAIL, SHINE, SQUEAK, and a VASH PLUSH all sit at a desk with a large CRT TV on it. Squeak and Vash are on top of the TV, and shelves with various items line the walls. Everyone seems to be unaware that the camera is rolling - Snail is reading the script, Shine is drinking from a mug, and Squeak is licking her butthole. Vash remains motionless.
Snail notices the camera zooming in, and throws away the script in a moment of panic. Shine and Squeak sit up to face the camera as well.
SNAIL: Coming at you pre-recorded, it’s Snail, Shine, and The Beasts!
SHINE: We’re here today to announce a special tournament we’re hosting: the TEAM DARK FEST!
SQUEAK: Eep!
VASH: weemp womp :]
SNAIL: You know ‘em, you love ‘em-
SHINE: Or hate them.
SNAIL: It’s all about TEAM DARK this week! Fellas, turn on that TV!
The camera cuts to a close-up of the TV as the screen flips on. Three shitty photos of each Team Dark member appear on the TV under the question “Who is the best member of Team Dark?” Every Team Dark member’s name is misspelled underneath the photos.
SHINE: Time for the ULTIMATE question: Who is the best Team Dark member?
SNAIL: Oof. We’re turning them against each other, huh? That’s dramatic.
SQUEAK: Meep! (HOLY SHIT)
The camera zooms out to a wide view of the studio, but zooms out much further than needed for a split second. For some reason, this is all being filmed on a green screen set, and the shelves behind the cast seem to be edited in. Not only that, but this studio is either widely over-staffed or widely under-staffed, because the boom mic is held by seven Chao stacked on top of each other. The camera zooms into a closeup of Snail before much of this information can be processed.
SNAIL: Well, it’s obviously Shadow. I told him if he won, I would get him ice cream after soccer practice!
The camera pans over to Shine.
SHINE: No way, vote for Rouge! She can carry like. Nineteen mountain lions. Give or take
The camera pans over to Squeak and Vash. Squeak points at a crude drawing of Omega that seems to say “VOTE OMEGA.” It is upside down. Vash holds a cute little sign that says “I <3 OMEGA” that he likely made himself.
SQUEAK + VASH: ?????????????? (we didn’t hire anyone to translate this part.)
Back in a wide shot, Snail and Shine stare blankly at Squeak and Vash. Squeak licks her butthole again. Vash is now Real. Someone off-screen sneezes very convincingly.
SHINE: This poll will run for ONE WEEK before we announce the winner! So little time…
SNAIL: Everyone make your vote count! The winner of this festival will have a special page in my… 
An image of a porcelain snail appears over a white background as an echo-y human voice says “SECRET UPCOMING PROJECT.”
VASH: bweep bwaa :] (Yay! Prizes!)
SHINE: The final verdict will be decided by Twitter AND Tumblr, so commit as much voter fraud as you please!
Squeak bites Vash and he screams. They both fall off the TV and make a surprising amount of noise. Snail and Shine stare in shock.
SNAIL: See you in seven days! And hey, if you want to participate… tag me in any propaganda you make to fight for your favorite Team Dark member!
Squeak and Vash explode.
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luvvyouforever · 7 months ago
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my girlfriend (wife) is a witch - sdv harvey x reader
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-> in which our beloved small town doctor falls in love with the new resident who just so happens to own a black cat, offer tarot readings in her farmhouse, and loves nothing more than a full moon.
-> not an accurate depiction of witches, just something fun, short, and sweet, harvey's a cutie patootie!
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"so, this card seems to be say that your business is gonna take off, which is strange considering your only available pool of patients is about thirty people who all already have yearly appointments booked."
harvey let out a deep chuckle, one that came from the pit of his stomach and traveled up through his chest. to the left of him was a stack of tarot card decks, with crystals stacked on top of those. to his right was an steadily flowing stick of incense that surrounded the backyard patio in a soft haze of lavender.
"maybe the citizens of zuzu will start making their way out here just to see lil' ole me," he said. his fingers toyed with the edge of one of the cards displayed on the table.
you shrugged your shoulders and began to shuffle your deck again, searching for another card. "you never know! the cards once said that lewis and marnie were secretly together and look what happened there! you can't doubt 'em."
harvey chuckled again then, remembering the moment you had bursted into the farmhouse, screaming about finding lewis's purple shorts in marnie's bedroom, all but confirming your suspicions that had been growing for seasons.
he was never much of a believer in anything but the real, practical world. as a doctor, he never allowed himself to indulge in the supernatural or superstitious. going under a ladder is bad luck? not for dr. harvey. however, the moment he fell in love with you, he let himself get absorbed into the world of daily tarot pulls, of drying flowers, of black cats, of full moons, of everything you loved.
snap! snap! "hellooo, earth to harv, please!" your voice snapped him out of his reverie and he noticed two new cards on the table.
"what do those say, dear?" he asked sweetly.
"well, this one says you should give in to spontaneity sometime today and this one is telling me that we should consider forgiving someone's faults," you said, admiring the foil art of the card.
"hmm...maybe i can spontaneously forgive george for verbally accosting me when i recommended that he lower his sodium intake," harvey suggested with a fake thoughtful fist on his chin.
"i think he'd be more open to drinking the elixirs and syrups i make in the basement before eating a salad, hon," you said with a laugh.
after the last pull, you slowly collected every card into a neat pile and tucked them back into their original packaging. harvey admired your handiwork as you placed your crystals back into a wooden box gifted to you by robin. with a smile, you looked up at your husband, only to find him staring at you with love-filled eyes.
you asked, "what are you looking at, huh?"
harvey shrugged his shoulders but made no move to turn his gaze away. "can i not look at my sweet, hard-working wife?"
with a playful roll to your eyes, you stood from the chair and planted a kiss on harvey's head. "speaking of hardworking, i have some strawberries that need harvesting! would you like to come help, my sweet, caring husband?"
harvey gladly stood and followed you through the backyard, into the house full of plants and charms hanging from the ceiling and walls, and out to the porch. at his heels was your black cat, meowing relentlessly for attention. on the porch, he slid on his gardening gloves and sun hat (sun protection is very important, he'd always say, and he always forced you into a straw hat at least).
perhaps his form of spontaneous forgiveness was forgiving himself for not admitting to his feelings earlier, for stressing so hard about finding someone to love, for not knowing sooner that this was always where he was meant to be, tarot cards and black cats and all.
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frenchbreadandeggs · 18 days ago
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JIN ENJOJI X READER | non-consensual clothing removal. implied assault. slight manga spoilers about Jiji. 3.4k wc
“Wanna go out and stargaze?” That’s what Jiji said before the both of you were chased down by blood sucking aliens. “I’m never going out stargazing with you again!” you screamed at his ear as the both of you ran away from the aliens. “I’m sorryyy!”
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“Hey, gimme that crab leg!” Momo yelled, as she tried to take a plate from grandma Seiko.
“Quit it kid, I paid for this!”
The two brawled at the table, leaving you, Okarun and Turbo Granny trying to eat peacefully.
Okarun let out a sight, glancing between Momo and Grandma Seiko as they wrestled over the crab leg. Plates clattered and the table shook under the petty chaos but neither of them showed any sign of backing down.
“You guys do this every time,” Okarun muttered, shaking his head as he poked his food. “Can’t we have a normal meal?”
You could only shake your head, while Turbo Granny cackled beside him, already halfway through a plate stacked high with food for a small lucky cat. “Let ‘em fight! Adds flavor to the meal!” she said, her sharp toothy grin stretching wide as she shoved more food into her mouth.
Momo finally managed to grab the crab leg, only for Seiko to counter by whacking her on the head with her hand.
“Ow! That’s dirty fighting!” Momo protested, rubbing her head.
“All’s fair in love and seafood!” Seiko shot back, snatching the crab leg back on triumph. “This is mine!”
Okarun sighed, again, pushing his plate away. “I’m starting to think I should’ve stayed home.”
“Momo, you can take my crab leg instead.” you pushed your plate towards her, her eyes shined like stars as she hugged you.
“My only loving cousin who is blood related to me actually cares for me, unlike that hag over there!”
“Who you sayin’ hag, huh?!”
“Ow ow ow! My ear!”
Both of them started bickering again, you could only give Okarun a small apology for seeing your family like this. He shyly waved it off, taking his food again and continued eating again. Before you could take a bite of your food, you heard a knock on the door. You quietly excused yourself as the both still brawled as you walked towards the door to see who’s outside at this hour. Opening it, you were greeted by a familiar face.
“Hello, kawaii-chan!” Jiji greeted you with a smile.
“Jiji! Why are you out here at this hour?” you asked, surprised by his visit.
He took something from his back and showed a plastic bag.
“Mom asked me to give this to your aunt—”
“Grandma.”
“G-grandma, she made too many and we couldn’t finish it with just the three of us so we got the extras for you!”
You gratefully took the plastic bag from Jiji, “Do you want to come in?”
“Uhhh actually… I wanna ask you if you wanna stargaze, tonight.” he looked away, pink blush coloring his cheeks. But you somehow didn’t notice.
“Oh, sure! I’ll put this inside and change—”
“But your clothes are decent enough though,” Jiji interrupted, pointing at your uniform.
He wasn’t wrong. You’re still in your school uniform since you usually eat first before changing into pajamas.
You shrugged, “Sure, I’ll tell Granny that I’ll go out.”
You offered Jiji to enter the house even joining in the dining area with the four but he politely refused. 
Upon entering the dining room, the scene hadn’t changed much. Momo and Seiko were still bickering, their voices loud enough to echo through the house. Okarun however, was now unconscious on the floor with a bump on his head and Turbo Granny laughing.
You sighed, shaking your head as you placed the bag on the table, “Oi, I’ll be going out with Jiji tonight. Don’t do anything weird at this house.”
Before they could even give you a response, you’ve already left.
“That was quick.” Jiji said as you were putting your shoes on.
“Nah, they were fighting over a crab leg so I just told them I’m going out with you and left.” you responded, taking a step outside the house.
“So, where are we goin’?”
The cliff overlooked Kamikoshi City, the entire landscape spread out beneath you like a glowing painting. The city lights sparkled across the skyline, casting a soft glow over the distant buildings and streets. Each flicker and glimmer seemed to pulse with life, creating a breathtaking view that drew a gasp from you.
“This is… amazing,” you murmured, feeling the cool night breeze brush against your skin. The vastness of it all, the contrast between the peaceful night sky and the bustling city below, was overwhelming in the best way.
Jiji stood beside you, hands in his pockets, smiling at your reaction. “Yeah, I thought you’d like it,” he said, before stepping closer.
He then placed his hand on your head, tilting it upward. “But look at this,” he added. Above, the stars twinkled like tiny diamonds scattered across the midnight sky, their light seemingly to pulse with an ethereal glow. 
The sight was mesmerizing, the stars stretching endlessly into the distance. “Holy shit…” you whispered, captivated by the beauty of the midnight sky.
Jiji chuckled softly beside you, lowering his hand. “Told you.”
As your eyes glued at the sky, Jiji cleared his throat. “Uh, I have something to say to you,” he mumbled.
“Hm?” You pulled your gaze away from the sky, turning to face him. The sight that greeted you was unexpected—Jiji’s face was flushed a deep red, like he’d just stepped out of a sauna. His usual carefree demeanor was replaced with visible tension, and he couldn’t quite meet your eyes.
You raised an eyebrow, curious. “What’s up?”
Jiji fidgeted, rubbing the back of his neck. “I… uh…” He trailed off, his nervousness intensifying. His usual confidence seemed to evaporate in the cool night air, leaving him at a loss for words.
“Jiji—”
You paused mid-sentence, your heart suddenly racing as you caught sight of something lurking behind Jiji. A faint, blue glow flickered in the shadows of the trees, two piercing eyes that seemed to watch you intently.
Your breath hitched in your throat, and you instinctively took a step back, feeling a chill run down your spine. He turned, following your gaze, and his expression shifted from confusion to alarm as he spotted the glowing eyes.
“What the hell is that?” Jiji muttered, his flusterness momentarily vanishing.
The eyes narrowed, and you could feel a sense of dread creeping closer. Whatever it was, it wasn’t friendly. You instinctively moved closer to Jij.
He felt you draw closer. Without thinking, he turned and pulled you behind him, his grip firm as he shielded you with his body. His grip on you never loosened.
Before either of you could react, a long, metallic tentacle shot out from the shadows, wrapping around your ankle. Panic surged through you as it yanked you off your feet, dragging you towards the darkness of the trees.
“Hey! No!” Jiji shouted, instinctively lunging forward but the distance was too great.
You clawed at the dirt, desperate not to be dragged into the unknown. While you were being dragged, you saw a branch. Quickly taking it, you then jabbed it to the tentacle resulting in letting you go.
Footsteps quickly went up to you and held both of your arms and helped you stand up to your feet.
Jiji huffed, “We need to get out of here—”
Before he could finish his sentence, another tentacle shot out from the shadows, snaking around his waist and lifting him off the ground. He let out a startled gasp, eyes wide with shock as he dangled helplessly in the air.
“Jiji!” you screamed, your heart racing as panic surged through you. You reached out instinctively, but the distance between you felt overwhelming.
As the creature stepped out of the shadows, your breath caught in your throat. It was a metallic alien, its body shimmering under the faint moonlight, revealing a sleek, elongated form covered in glinting scales. Its eyes glowed with a menacing blue light, illuminating its sharp, angular features.
“Foolish humans,” it spoke, its voice echoing unnaturally, reverberating in the still night air. “I need female blood to sustain myself… and a male genital. How lucky I am.”
“What’s with you aliens and private parts!” you shouted.
“Power,” it responded wickedly, sending shivers down your spine. “Now shut up, this won’t hurt.”
Before you could react, it lunged another tentacle toward you. It was too fast, ensnaring both of your arms and lifting you off the ground. You gasped, feeling the grip tighten around you like a vise.
Jiji's eyes widened in horror as he struggled against his own restraints. “Let her go!” he shouted with desperation, his voice breaking through the tension in the air.
The metallic alien turned its glowing gaze toward him, its expression unreadable but its intent clear. “Silence!” it hissed, the tentacles around you tightening as it drew you closer to its maw, the cold metal brushing against your skin.
As it drew nearer, the alien grumbled, “Your clothes are useless; the more skin exposed, the more places I can draw blood.”
With a swift motion, it tore the top of your uniform, leaving you exposed down to your bra. You gasped, horror and anger washing over you. “My uniform!” you shouted, kicking your legs frantically in a desperate attempt to break free. “You perv! That cost my week’s allowance!”
The alien’s glowing eyes narrowed, its metallic form looming over you with a chilling satisfaction. “Do not concern yourself with such trivial matters. Your pain will only serve to nourish me.”
“Shut up!” you spat back, anger rising within you. “You think you can just take whatever you want? I won’t let you!”
The alien ignored your words as it revealed more tentacles at its back, shutting you up in the process. This is it, it is your end.
You squeezed your eyes shut, bracing yourself for the pain you feared would come. Instead, to your shock, the alien released its grip on your arms, and you fell into someone’s waiting embrace.
“Gotcha!” came a familiar voice, warm and reassuring. You opened your eyes to see Jiji holding you securely in his arms.
“Jiji?! How—”
“I trained under your aun— I mean your grandma without needing the evil eye!” he declared, a grin breaking through the tension as he tightened his grip on you.
You remembered he did train under Granny Seiko. You looked at the side where the unconscious alien was and saw the ground dented.
Before you could speak, a blast cut you off not far from your position. You froze, heart racing as a UFO descended from the sky, its tentacles swaying ominously at its sides. To your horror, more aliens—similar to the one that had attacked you both—poured out of the craft, their glowing eyes scanning the area as they began to advance.
“We need to run! WE NEED TO RUN!” you screamed, adrenaline surging through you. You jumped out of Jiji’s arms and grabbed his hand, yanking him into a sprint.
The two of you dashed through the underbrush, branches whipping against your skin as you navigated the chaotic terrain. The sounds of the aliens behind you echoed in the night air, their guttural growls mixing with the rustle of leaves and the pounding of your heart.
You were now being chased by blood sucking aliens.
“I’m never going out stargazing with you again!” you screamed at his ear as the both of you ran away from the aliens.
“I’m sorryyy!” he cried out loud.
Jiji’s legs burned as he pushed himself to keep pace with you, heart racing more from fear than the sprint itself. “How was I supposed to know they’d come out of nowhere?” he wailed, his voice cracking as another alien screeched behind you.
You glanced over your shoulder just in time to see one of the blood-sucking aliens close in, its grotesque, tentacles stretching unnaturally fast. “Less talking, more running!” you yelled, grabbing Jiji’s arm to yank him forward as he tripped over a rock.
“I really didn’t mean for this to happen,” he huffed, his breath ragged from the frantic sprint. “I just wanted us to have a chill night, look at the stars, maybe talk about—”
A sharp, hissing sound interrupted his apology as another alien leaped from a nearby tree, its glowing blue eyes locking onto both of you.
“Save it for after we survive!” you barked, dragging him down to the road you both took when you hiked to the cliff. Your heart pounded in your chest, adrenaline coursing through your veins as the aliens screeched louder, closing in from every direction.
Jiji stumbled again, nearly pulling you down with him. “Why do these things always happen when we hang out?!”
“I don’t know! But maybe we should stop hanging out!” you yelled, half-joking as you pushed yourself harder. Your legs burned, but the fear of those creatures fueled you.
A blast of energy hit the ground beside you, sending dirt and debris into the air. You barely dodged it, pulling Jiji out of harm's way. The cliff edge loomed nearby, but there was no time to admire the view.
“We need a plan!” Jiji shouted, glancing back at the approaching aliens. “We can’t outrun them forever!”
“You can do that laser beam shit right?!” you said, “I haven’t fully controlled my powers unlike Momo but I can push them into one line and you can blast them!”
Jiji's eyes widened as he stumbled, nearly tripping over a branch in his shock. “W-What?! I haven’t exactly mastered that yet!”
“We don’t have a choice!” you interrupted, yanking him back on track. “I’ll line them up. Just focus!”
The screeches from the aliens were growing louder, closer. You could practically feel their cold, metallic presence nipping at your heels.
“Alright,” Jiji huffed, swallowing his fear. “But if we die, I’m blaming you!”
You threw him a sharp look, “Just concentrate!”
Gathering your breath, you dug deep into your energy reserves, feeling a familiar warmth surge through your veins. You pivoted, locking your focus on the swarm of aliens behind you. With a fierce shove of your hand, you forced the air around them to compress, pushing them into a tight line like bowling pins. They writhed and screeched in response, tentacles flailing in resistance, but you held them there, your heart pounding from the strain.
“Now, Jiji!” you yelled, sweat beading down your forehead.
Jiji planted his feet, his expression grim as he raised his trembling hands toward the creatures. The familiar energy crackled around his palms, flickering uncertainty. For a second, you thought it wouldn’t work, but then—
A beam of bright energy shot from his palms, exploding into the air with a deafening roar. The blast surged forward, striking the trapped aliens and sending a shockwave that lit up the entire forest.
When the dust settled, the screeching had stopped. Only silence remained.
Jiji, breathless and wide-eyed, turned to you, a mix of awe and disbelief on his face. “Did… did that really just work?”
You exhaled heavily, releasing the tension in your body as you slumped down on a nearby rock. “Barely,” you muttered, staring at the smoking crater where the aliens once stood. "But we’re alive, so I’ll take it."
Jiji collapsed beside you, laughing weakly. “I need a nap.”
“Hey,” you raised the upper part of your body and faced him, “We need to go home first.”
He looked at you, then his eyes looked down. There was this unexplainable reaction from him as his face turned red again and looked away.
“Huh? What’s the matter?”
“You don’t have a top on…”
Your eyes widened as you followed Jiji’s gaze, realizing that your torn uniform had been left in shambles from the earlier attack. Heat flooded your cheeks as you instinctively crossed your arms over your chest.
“J-Jiji!” you sputtered, glaring at him as you quickly tried to cover yourself. “Why didn’t you say something sooner?!”
“I—I didn’t want to make it weird!” Jiji stammered, his face a deep shade of red as he kept his eyes firmly averted, staring intently at a nearby rock. “I mean, we were fighting for our lives! There wasn’t really time to—”
“Ugh, just—turn around or something!” you snapped, completely mortified.
Jiji awkwardly spun on his heel, back facing you as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Right, right! Sorry, my bad!”
You groaned in frustration but couldn’t help the small laugh that bubbled up despite the embarrassment. “This has officially been the weirdest night ever.”
“Agreed,” Jiji muttered, still bright red. “Here,” he draped his jacket over you.
You blinked in surprise as Jiji draped his jacket over your shoulders, the fabric still warm from his body.
“Thanks,” you muttered, pulling it tighter around yourself. The jacket was oversized on you, the sleeves dangling past your hands, but it was much better than nothing.
Jiji rubbed the back of his neck again, his usual energy replaced by an awkward tension. “No problem. I, uh, didn’t want you to be uncomfortable.”
You nodded, you then remembered something. “Oh yeah, you wanted to say something?” you said, looking up to him.
Jiji froze for a moment, his eyes widening slightly as if he had forgotten all about what he had planned to say. His face turned red, again, and avoided eye contact, glancing everywhere except at you.
“Uh… yeah,” he mumbled, scratching the back of his head nervously. “I… I wanted to tell you something earlier, before, you know—” he gestured vaguely at the destroyed cliffside and the direction the aliens had fled.
You raised an eyebrow, curious. “Before the aliens attacked?”
“Yeah,” he nodded, taking a deep breath as if he were trying to summon all of his courage. “I just... I didn’t get the chance because of all the chaos, but I’ve been meaning to tell you for a while now.”
You waited, your heart pounding slightly. “Tell me what?”
Jiji glanced at you briefly, then quickly looked away again. “I… I like you,” he finally blurted out, his voice rushed but genuine. “Like, more than just friends.”
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“It’s almost midnight, where the hell is she?” Momo grunted, worry laced in her annoyed voice. “She haven’t exactly mas—”
A knock on the door cut Momo off, she hurriedly ran to the door and opened. Momo's eyes widened at the sight of you standing there, wrapped in Jiji’s oversized jacket, while Jiji stood awkwardly behind you, shirtless and looking very out of place. Her mouth hung open for a second, taking in the bizarre scene before her.
“What the—?” Momo blurted, her annoyance quickly shifting to shock. “Where the hell have you two been?!” she then looked at Jiji,  “And why are you half-naked?!”
You were too tired to speak, but you forced yourself anyway. “Long story… involving aliens. Again.”
Jiji scratched the back of his head, clearly embarrassed. “I can explain, but it’s not what it looks like!”
Momo crossed her arms, her expression a mix of disbelief and concern. “You’d better explain fast, because this is getting ridiculous.”
You pushed your cousin inside the house, “We’ll do that tomorrow, it’s super late.”
“Okay fine,” Momo huffed, “I’ll leave you two alone.”
As Momo disappeared into the house, you turned back to Jiji, exhaustion weighing on your shoulders. The events of the night were still catching up to you, and it felt like you could collapse at any moment.
Jiji shifted uncomfortably under your gaze, his face still slightly flushed. “So… would you still stargaze with me?” he said with a weak chuckle, trying to ease the tension.
“Of course, though the place should not be reeking of spirits and aliens.” you replied, putting your hands inside his borrowed jacket.
Jiji gave a soft smile, “No aliens and spirits, noted.”
“Yeah,” you replied, letting out a small, tired laugh. “Let’s save that for a less eventful night.”
For a moment, you both stood in the quiet hallway, the weight of the night hanging between you.
“Get some rest,” he finally said, his voice soft. “I’ll head home before your grandma decides I’m staying the night.” He offered a small, playful smile, but you could see the exhaustion in his eyes.
“Yeah, I’ll do that.” You gave him a tired nod, then glanced toward the door. “Thanks again, Jiji. For… everything.”
He scratched the back of his head awkwardly, smiling a little brighter. “You don’t have to thank me. You’re my… friend.” His voice faltered at the last word, and for a split second, something more flickered in his eyes before he quickly turned and headed toward the door.
As he opened it, a gust of cool night air swept in. “Goodnight,” he said, throwing a final wave over his shoulder before stepping outside.
You stood there for a moment longer, staring at the now-closed door, a strange mix of relief, exhaustion, and something unspoken settling in your chest.
“Hey, Jiji.”
“Yeah?”
“I like you too.”
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remxedmoon · 4 months ago
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“an innocent kid. its bleeding can fill the belly of even the strongest warrior, but do you have the heart to do it?”
hooved
0 power - 1 health - 1 blood
worthy sacrifice - cards bearing this sigil count as 3 blood rather than 1 blood when sacrificed.
morsel - when a card bearing this sigil is sacrificed, ⁣it adds its stat values to the card it was sacrificed for.
hidden trait - hearty meal
when this card is sacrificed, add an additional +3 power, +2 health to the card it was sacrificed to summon. this trait stacks with the morsel sigil and stat increases from the campfire event.
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teehee. people are going to yell at me for this one i think. ANYWAYS!! BONIBAHS!! THE KID!!! my poor little blorbothing. they get extra card art because they’re my favorite (joking). writeup below!!!
sowwyyy this one’s evil. i think the sigils are pretty self explanatory this time? worthy sacrifice lets you play super powerful cards, and morsel lets you buff em even more. plus!! with the hearty meal trait they get at least +3 in both stats! the ethics are questionable though.
this was like. the second card i designed out of all of them. my original concept (when it was like 1 am and i was half asleep) was uh… morsel, trinket bearer, and waterborne? trinket bearer because they carry the items, and waterborne to keep them out of danger. but that’s a really weird card. plus…
baby goats are called kids!! the name is wordplay!! i decided to make them a variant on the black goat purely for that reason. and just like the black goat, the symbol on their head is the symbol for sacrifices!
ok i should probably acknowledge the sog in the room. in the base game, you’re able to replace your eye with a goat’s eye. this decision does literally nothing except make the black goat cuter. and bonnie’s a goat!! so they also get silly art. they turn into a sopping wet pathetic cat. i don’t have an inhabited version of this sprite because i couldn’t. find footage of it being inhabited. which is probably because you can’t get the goat’s eye in kaycee’s mod but. eh… i don’t want to deal with the sigil patch nonsense again.
my initial sketch of this card had them as a 2 blood but… it kinda made them worse than the regular black goat thanks to the fair hand mechanic. so they’re the only 1 blood here. they’re my blorbo they can be overpowered. as a treat.
the sigil patch is many lives! which allows a card to be sacrificed without actually killing it. both for synergy with worthy sacrifice and also because i’m Evil
also additional fun fact: the black goat is actually my favorite card in vanilla inscryption!! i basically cheesed the entirety of kaycee’s mod with it. i like it a lot :). i didn’t intend to fuse my favorite character and my favorite card together but it’s a happy lil coincidence.
huh. weird. that’s the entire party right? it feels like we’re missing one though… whatever. patchless alt below!
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omegas-reincarnation · 2 months ago
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It is a source of continual joy to me that the temeraire dragons sleep in piles. I can't immagine a more delightful mental image. stack 'em. Like kitty cats. Wonderful.
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tightjeansjavi · 11 months ago
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The Menu | Part 1
“Vices to fill a Void”
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A/N: so I decided this is gonna be a two-parter because if theres one thing I’m good at, it’s edging my dear readers ;)
~word count: 3.4k~
Pairing | dark! Joel Miller x f! reader
Summary: Joel Miller has a menu concocted just for his customers. Pills? He’s got ‘em. Guns? Ammo? Name your price. Booze to warm the broken souls and hearts of the QZ? give him a holler. Everything comes with a price, of course. Joels got somethin’ special on his menu. Somethin’ that he doesn’t advertise freely. Y’gotta want it. Y’gotta have a desire that matches his own, only then will he offer what you seek.
Warnings: dark themes, two feral cats energy, mentions of deceased bodies, Joel is an asshole that knows how to get exactly what he wants. Dark! Joel, post!outbreak, Joel and Tess run the black market in the QZ, age gap, Joel is in his 40’s reader is in her late 20’s, mentions of drugs, smoking, alcohol, graphic depictions of violence, reader is a spitfire with a no-shit taking attitude, enemies to lovers type beat, Joel likes to play mind games, reader has no physical descriptions, readers nickname is Angel, +18 minors dni!
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The first time you meet the infamous Joel Miller is in his and Tess’s apartment in one of the few available Boston QZ apartments. Rumor on the street is that Joel and Tess are an item. When in all actuality, they’re business partners that occasionally fuck. His options, however, are not just limited to Tess. He likes to keep that part of his business on the low. He’s got a reputation, sure. But he doesn’t boast it proudly like a peacock. He knows his expertise, and he knows it well. His purpose in the structure of the QZ was smuggling. He’d bring pills, booze, ammo, guns, and anything else that was desirable. He’d trade for ration cards; a hefty amount of them. Sometimes, he’d allow his customers to trade their bodies, but he was quite picky, and it ain’t had anything to do with women’s appearances. In that department, he indulged in all body types. What he was most intrigued about was their minds. Their ability to survive, and most importantly, what they desired most in this shit-hole world.
He liked it when they were verbal. Silence was not a name in his game. He liked it when they showed up at his doorstep knowing exactly what it was that they wanted from him. He could play all the cards, and he played them well. He could be empathetic if they asked for it. He could pretend to love them just for the night. He could yank their hair, dig his nails into their flesh and call them a dirty, useless whore, but only if it was requested. See, he wasn’t all that brutal of a man, but if you weren’t careful and direct, he might send you home with more than just an ache between your thighs. He knew how to fuck, and he enjoyed it almost as much as he enjoyed beating a man senseless, almost.
You, however, held no interest to know what laid beneath his weathered jeans. You showed up wanting one thing, and one thing only. A vice to fill the hole in the void of your heart. You knew that Joel Miller’s menu was just what the doctor ordered.
Tess and Joel were seated at the kitchen table going through their supplies for the day. They had their usual customers, but Joel was always intrigued to see new faces walk through his door.
A cigarette dangled between his lips as he flipped through a stack of ration cards. The scent of tobacco wafted through the cracks in the door frame as your knuckles rapped firmly along the chipped paint. You knocked once, then twice five seconds later. It was customary like a code. Not that Joel or Tess had any concerns with FEDRA; they were a part of his regular cycle of customers too.
“Come in.” His voice was thick, deep, and dripping with authority.
The tip of the cigarette glowed bright orange as he inhaled the toxic fumes. The nicotine that coursed through his system calmed his nerves. Everyone had their own skeletons in their closets after all.
He paused his counting momentarily as he listened to the door handle squeak before it was pushed open.
“Sit.” He rasped with his freehand gesturing to the open seat in front of the table. “State your business.”
You watched the way the smoke coiled around his head like an ashy halo through the stagnant air. His brow cocked in your direction as his eyes zoned in on the stack of ration cards that you pulled from your jacket pocket.
“I was told that your menu is designed to cater to one's vices. I’m needin’ a bottle of booze, and a pack of smokes if you got any.” You placed the ration cards along the table before leaning back against the chairs frame.
“We ain’t got a whole pack, unfortunately. Five cards gets you five sticks, and three gets ya a bottle of hooch.” He declared in his warm Texas twang.
He was handsome, you’d give him that satisfaction only.
“I’ve got ten cards total. How about you throw’n two more smokes to make it even?” You countered smoothly as you crossed your arms against your chest.
“A negotiator, huh? Well, I'll tell ya what, girlie. Y’got yourself a deal. Y’new around here? Ain’t seen ya before.” He knew pretty much every face in the QZ. But yours remained a mystery. He wasn’t all too big of a fan of mysteries.
“Don’t think that is any of your concern, Joel.” You ignored his question as you passed off the cards.
“True.” He mused with a grin tugging across his lips. ‘S’alright. I’ll jus’ end up findin’ out about you in my own way.” He shrugged with the utmost casualness that sent your blood boiling under the surface. “Besides, my customers always end up comin’ back for more.” He grabbed a bottle of hooch and seven freshly rolled cigarettes concealed in tinfoil.
“There ain’t much for you to find out. Wouldn’t go wastin’ your time.” You grabbed the bottle swiftly before tucking it into the inner lining of your jacket. Before he could send you on your way, however, you unrolled the tinfoil to inspect the handiwork. Once you were satisfied with the merch, you plucked one of the cigarettes and placed it between your lips. “You got a light I can borrow?”
His nose twitched and his eyes squinted tightly before he reached into his pocket and pulled out a lighter. He beckoned you silently to lean in as he ignited the flame.
“Y’know, these are a nasty habit to break.” He leaned back into his chair with his own cigarette dying between his lips. “Ain’t nothin’ like a good ole’ fashioned nicotine addiction.”
You scoffed under your breath as you took a deep inhale of the cancerous smoke that filled your lungs. “Says the man puffin’ away on one right in front of my face.”
He didn’t even look half fazed by your remark as he blew the smoke drifting from his lips off to the side.
You stared at one another a second longer before you stood up from your chair and snatched the cigarettes from the table.
“It was a pleasure doing business with you, Joel Miller. See ya around.”
Before he could respond, you were already slipping back out his apartment door and into the hallway.
“Man, she’s got a pair of balls on her, huh?” Tess mused from her seat alongside him.
“Yeah,” He smirked. “She sure does.”
The next time you saw Joel Miller was a few weeks later. You were assigned with assisting in dumping deceased infected into the deep pits where their flesh would be burned and melted away and all that would be remaining was their brittle bones. You had done this job enough times to get used to the putrid stench of rotting flesh. Others, however, couldn’t stand the smell. Some would pass out, others would empty what little was in their stomachs.
A denim-clad shoulder brushed against you as you lifted another body from the truck bed.
“Fancy seein’ you here, Angel.” Joel’s voice was muffled through the bandana he wore across his face, but you knew it was him just from that Texas twang of his.
Your eyes rolled back as walked past him and dropped the body into the flames that engulfed it.
“C’mon now.” He mused. “I know y’heard me.” He pressed.
“Fuck off, Joel.” You muttered under your breath as you bumped his shoulder harshly.
“Y’break that nasty habit yet?” He asked with a twinge of curiosity.
“Nope. Don’t plan on it either.”
Much to your relief, he walked away without speaking another word. It was short-lived however as he was standing right behind you in line to receive your ration cards for the day. The air was hot and almost unbearable as you wiped the sweat of your brow along your sleeve. When the cards were placed into your outstretched palm you shoved them deep into your pocket. The pay wasn’t worth the work that you put in.
Before you could disappear around the corner of the alley to head home, a hand grasped your shoulder rather firmly and before you could reach for your concealed weapon, your back was met with something hard that nearly knocked the air from your lungs.
Joel Miller.
“Just what the fuck do you think you’re doin’, Joel?!” You hissed under your breath as he flipped you around to face him.
“Got a proposition for ya, girlie. Trust me, you’ll want in.” His voice dipped down an octave as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a packet of pills. Painkillers you suspected. The kind of shit that people could easily find themselves getting addicted to.
“And what makes you fuckin’ think that I would wanna do anythin’ for you?” What the fuck was this guys problem? The nerve he had.
“Cus’ I know there’s somethin’ that you want. Somethin’ that you need. Besides, you ain’t gonna make it long here if you don’t start usin’ people. S’the only way to survive in this world now. So, here’s what you’re gonna do. Tess and I wanna branch out further and in order to do that, we gotta get the rest of FEDRA off our backs.”
“You ain’t know shit about me, Joel. I’m doin’ just fine on my own.” You ripped your arm from his grasp, but he was quicker than you expected.
“I ain’t askin’ you, Angel. I’m tellin.’ Now, you’re gonna take these pills, and you’re gonna go on over to those guys o’there, and you’re gonna trade them. Y’get half the ration cards from the deal. Seem fair?” His tall stature loomed over you like a shadow being casted across the sun. Everything about this man was massive. His hands. His bulging arms. His shoulders. He was built like a fucking fridge, and he clearly wasn’t taking no for an answer.
“Is this what you do to all of your customers? Corner them into alleys and force them to do your dirty work for you?” You scoffed as you ripped the baggy from his hand. “And I get all the cards. I ain’t gonna let you just go and boss me around for half.”
“Jus’ the pretty ones that have a mouth to ‘em.” He mused with a wicked grin. “Fine. Y’get all the cards, but only if they agree to trade. Go on now, Angel. Time's a tickin away.” He nudged you forward with the palm of his calloused hand resting along your lower back.
“Asshole.” You hissed under your breath as you stashed the pills into your pocket before departing from the alley. If there was one thing you were good at, it was getting men to give you exactly what you wanted. You could flutter your lashes, giggle, flirt a little and their little egos would be crushed to dust beneath your fingertips.
“Hey boys, got a minute?” You spoke in a honeyed voice as the three officers diverted their attention towards you.
Joel watched from the shadows of the alley as you worked your charm like a fiddle. He was impressed with your natural skills. You certainly were no pushover. He did wonder if this was all a facade that you wore confidently. He thought briefly about what it would be like to have you beneath his sheets. What would you request from him? Would you ask him to be sweet and gentle? To fuck you like a man oughta? Or, would you be willing to share your deepest, darkest, filthy desires with him? He hoped for the latter.
When the deal was done, you made your way back across the street. Maybe Joel Miller was right. Maybe you should start using people for what they have. Who gave a fuck about morale anyway?
“How’d it go?” he inquired with his broad arms crossed against his chest as he leaned back against the brick wall.
“They wouldn’t take the bait unfortunately.” You let out a faux sigh. “Guess the deal is off.”
“What a shame, Angel. I surely thought you had it in ya. Guess I was wrong. Oh well. Good luck to ya.” He pushed himself off the wall only to find himself being pushed right up against it. Your palm lay flat against his chest as your freehand reached into your pocket and pulled out a single ration card.
His brow raised curiously as you went to slip the card into his back pocket. His eyes widened when he felt the warmth of your fingers searing through his jeans. At this close proximity, he got a proper whiff of your natural scent, and his cock pathetically twitched in the tight confines of the denim.
“Here’s your half of the deal. Decided to be generous.” You whispered through the thick growing tension.
His hand reached up to grab your wrist but before he could make contact with your skin, you were already stepping away from his reach. Your fingers rose in a mock salute before you turned on your heel and walked away.
Fuck. She’s perfect.
The next time Joel Miller saw you it's past curfew. Hours to be exact. The Boston QZ streets are quiet sans the labored breathing and deep grunts coming from a group of low-life scumbags.
“I already told you, I don’t have shit on me!” You emptied out your pockets to show these fuckers that you weren’t messing around. Would raw honesty really keep these men from tearing you apart?
“Bullshit. Y’got stuff back at your place, right? C’mon now darlin’, don’t lie to us. We’ve seen you hangin’ around Miller. Y’workin’ with him?” The man that had you pinned against the brick wall pressed further.
“Oh, for fuck sakes! Are y’all really that boneheaded to think that i’m gonna be carryin’ merch on me out in the open like this?!” You yelled out of frustration as you tried to pin your wrists free to reach your concealed knife.
“How about you shut the fuck up and tell us where Joel’s apartment is, and we won’t have to kill you. How’s that sound?” The man twisted your wrists tightly to the point where you were just waiting to hear a sickening crack.
“I don’t know where his apartment is, asshole. And even if I did know, I wouldn’t tell the likes of you because i’m not a fuckin’ rat!” You hissed between your gritted teeth as you threw your head back in one swift movement right into the face of the man that was holding you hostage. His nose crunched audibly from the force as he stumbled back right onto his ass.
Blood pooled and gushed down his lips as he yelled out a slew of profanities in your direction. Just as you were reaching for your knife, it was knocked from your grasp and clattered to the concrete out of your reach.
A fist collided with your face that sent you slamming into the brick wall with your ears wildly ringing.
You detected a familiar voice through your half-conscious haze as you slumped down to the ground with a labored wheeze.
A sickening crunch, followed by a strangled yell as Joel had one of the men in a headlock. Their body dropped to the ground like a bag of bricks. Eyes forever unmoving. The man that you headbutted was desperately trying to crawl away as Joel staggered after him. He bent down, grasping the hilt of your knife in his calloused palm.
His pupils were dark like a never ending black pit as he sent his steel-toed boot colliding into his gut over and over again. The man’s wails died in his throat as Joel flipped him over onto his back and slit his throat with one fatal swipe. Blood spurted from the entry wound and speckled Joel’s skin in a spray of crimson.
The third man almost got away, but Joel fired a bullet right into his spine without a second thought.
He focused his attention on you as he crouched down, knife still in his grasp, dripping with blood onto the pavement. His freehand grasped your face gently as he assessed your injuries. His good ear detected the sound of tires crunching under gravel; FEDRA.
“Angel, we need to go. We need to move. NOW.” He spoke urgently as he tucked your knife away before placing that hand along your shoulder. “FEDRA is gonna be here any minute, and I don’t know about you, but my ass is NOT bein’ thrown in lockup!”
When you didn’t immediately respond to his dire request, he took matters into his own hands, literally. You felt his strong arms lift you from the ground as if you weighed nothing. He left the crime scene in a flash. He was speaking to you, but you couldn’t detect his words as his mouth was moving too fast.
The last thing you remembered seeing was his dark, espresso brown eyes, and his blood spattered skin.
“Need’ya to open your eyes for me, sweetheart. C’mon. Guy knocked ya pretty good, but you’ll live.” Joel murmured close to your face as you were coming to.
What the fuck.
Your lashes fluttered for a moment and then snapped open. Despite the ache in your face from being punched, and the pounding in your skull, you immediately shot your hands upwards and shoved harshly at his broad chest.
“Joel?! What the actual fuck–”
“Ah, there she is. The sleepin’ beauty awakes, finally!” He’s grinning like a cheshire cat as he moves off the couch to give you space to breathe.
“What the fuck are you doin’ here, Joel?”
“Wow.” He tuts under his breath dissaprovingly. “Can’t even get a thank you for savin’ your fuckin’ life?”
“I had the situation handled on my own. What the hell were you doin’ out past curfew anyway?” You sat up a little too fast as blood rushed to your head.
His strong hands were gently easing you back down to a lying position before he was backing off again.
“Easy now, Angel. I wouldn’t sit up a’that fast if I were you.” He warned you sternly.
“Well, good thing you aren’t me, huh?” You snapped back as you swung your legs over the side of the couch.
This time he was more forceful in his actions as his hands pressed down on your shoulders firmly. “I said, stay put. God, can’t you jus’ fuckin’ listen to me when I tell ya to take it easy? You’re gonna bust your nose back open, and the stitches on the back of your head. Just chill the fuck out.” You could taste his hot breath on his tongue and feel his pulse quicken. The bulging veins in his neck protruded through the thin skin.
You swallowed harshly as your gaze wavered along the remnants of blood on his skin. Why didn’t he bother to wash it off? You couldn't help but wonder.
“I didn’t fuckin’ need your help, Joel. And you still haven’t answered my previous question either.”
He rolled his eyes before he lifted his hands from your shoulders and stalked away into the kitchen. You heard him grumbling under his breath as he slammed open a cabinet door that was already hanging by the hinges on its last legs.
“Oh, I see. So you’re just gonna ignore me now? Y’know, its fuckin’ rude to not answer someone when they ask you a question, Joel.” You muttered mostly to yourself, but you secretly had hoped that he heard you too.
Two semi-cleaned glasses were yanked from the sink and lifted from their rims as Joel swiped up a bottle of whiskey before stalking back over to the couch. He slammed the glasses down on the faded coffee table before popping the cap off with his teeth.
You were infuriating. Disrespectful. And he wanted nothing more than to put you right back into your fucking place. He however, refrained from doing so and instead poured a large splash of amber liquor into both glasses.
“Y’know, Angel. One day that mouth of yours is gonna send ya six feet under.” He stated firmly as he picked up his glass, swirled the liquor around before throwing it down his throat in one gulp.
Your eyes narrowed into slits as you glared at him from the couch. You reached for your own glass as you slowly sat up. He was pouring himself another when you downed the liquor without a fuss.
“I am well aware of that, Joel.” You deadpanned and he poured you another.
“Good, that’s real good, Angel. S’then it should come as no surprise to you that I think you’re a fuckin’ disrespectful brat.” He rasped low and deep as his words rumbled like an oncoming storm.
The tension in the room was palpable as you stared one another down. Two predators with sharpened claws ready to strike.
______
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please follow @tightjeansjaviupdates for fic updates as I no longer use a masterlist!
banners made by the lovely @saradika
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blue--ingenue · 1 year ago
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soft!sebastian headcannons - part 3
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Author's Note: as promised, soft!seb headcannons. i'm honestly having a great time writing these, so i'll keep em coming as long as people are interested in reading them :) might make the Christmas hc into a mini-fic at some point, we'll see hehehe
you’ve both agreed not to speak to each other after a fight until you’ve both calmed down. if he can’t talk to you he’ll huff and perform little acts of service. he notices you’re running out of ink, and the next day at your first class you sit at your usual seat to find a fresh pot of jet-black ink
will whine if he thinks you’re not giving him enough attention (usually while studying). acts like a cat (slowly nudging your textbook closer to the edge of the table until you’re forced to snatch it from him, comes up behind you and resting his chin on your head while you’re reading)
HEAVY sleeper. between his packed class schedule and quidditch practice, boy is exhausted. someone could cast confringo next to his pillow and the most he’d do is roll to the other side of the bed. Ominis once levitated an entire stack of books and dropped them on the floor next to his nightstand to test this. he didn’t even stir
if you share a bed he 100% tries to pull you back in every time you try to get up. will roll on top of you and refuse to move. he’s also not above feigning sleep if it means you’re more likely to stay in bed with him
fidgets a lot. twirls his wand during lectures, definitely plays with your hair if you’re sitting next to him. either paces while reading or switches spots every few minutes. every time you enter the common room he’s curled up on a different couch or settee
his socks are always mismatched. he reasons that nobody will notice so he doesn’t see the point in properly pairing them. the only time you’ve seen him in matching socks was on your first date. he nicked a pair from Ominis’ drawer but of course his friend noticed. the Gaunt boy hid a non-venomous snake in his sock drawer and used parseltongue to command it to scare the daylights out of Sebastian. he still refuses to pair his socks, but has vowed to steer clear of Ominis’ dresser
used to dread Christmas because it hurts to remember the happiest times before the death of his parents. you, Ominis, and Anne decide to help him make new holiday memories to cherish. you all decide to stay at the castle for the holidays. you spend most of the day outside, playing in the snow. to your surprise, Ominis is the one to throw the first snowball. after it hits Sebastian square in the back of the head feigns innocence and blames Anne. Anne levitates a pile of snow to fall directly on top of him in retaliation and so commences a vicious snowball fight
at one point he intercepts a snowball that was meant for you. he pretends like he’s been mortally wounded, falling to the ground for dramatic effect
(boy is shameless and will do anything to have you fuss over him)
says he has a surprise for you and leads you to a pile of pumpkin-sized snowballs. he flicks his wand in their direction and they animate themselves into puffskeins, jumping around you and puffing out into clouds of snow as soon as they make contact with you
(it took him a week to learn the spell, but it’s worth it to hear you giggle under a mountain of snow-puffskeins)
on Christmas eve he holds you in his arms as you fall asleep in front of the crackling common room fireplace. doesn’t want to disturb your sleep, so he levitates a blanket over the both of you and tucks in for the night
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phen397 · 15 days ago
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Sonic Adventure 2 but told as notes I took while playing
OK here we go
Big game for the series
Not sure if this game has multiple story modes like in sonic adventure
But let's get into this
It has the same like 15 seconds of live and learn looped for the title and select screens
And OK
2 stories hero and dark
Let's start on the hero side
Above the capital
Sigma alpha
Captured hedgehog secured
WHAT IN THE WORLD
No food or movies gotta dip
I am sure that part of the helicopter isn't important
Skydiving now
With a snowboard
First stage city escape time to board down the city streets
Sick tricks off ramps
Fuck dem cars
Escape from the city indeed
Also got the song playing too*chef's kiss*
Done with boarding time to run
Oh God it's Omochao
Burn him
Break the boxes
Weird pipe?
Whistle
Oh hello raccoon friend
Jump scare robot
Got coloured tubes
Can use them to raise Chao
Run down the streets this time
Chao box
Got Chao key
U mean to tell me you are gonna hide secrets from me
Oh oh
You got me
Rabbit was hiding in corner
Got so much stuff it is falling off the screen
Is that bad?
Is it gone?
Where does it go?
Song still going hard af
Only now get told how to do a homing attack
Oh God Oh shit
Gun got a whole truck after me
BIG NO!
Big got crushed!
I will get you gun I will avenge you cat man
End of level
Def missed some stuff
E rank OOF
one sonic thing
Chao world
Welcome
Is this in space?
Who made this(lore)?
Ah yes the gate to Chao space
Spit out all the tubes
Next level
Boring game of tag
Boss time
F-6t Big Foot
What did I do?
Why all this effort for little old me
Avoid the flying shooter
Hit em when he lands
Boss done
"Hey guy take care"
What?
Oh hi shadow
Ultimate power jewel
Chaos emerald
What he want with it
Fake hedgehog
Chaos controll
Fast boi
Uses the emerald to warp
Ultimate life form has no time for games
Not again
Ah yes desert area
Rouge and knuckles at it again
Don't know when to give up
Master emerald is mine got it?
Can neutralize the emeralds
Eggman gets grabby
Knuckles shatters that thing
Look what you did
Can restore the pieces so all good
He says "bat girl" so aggressively
Find 3 pieces
Super chill music
Kinda nice just to explore and fly around
Lots of animals here
Big winds
First piece get
Another pipe to whistle at
Lonely statue looks Lonely
Thanks omachao
I got a dragon from the Chao box
Got a bomb
Got the last one and got squished at the same time
Chao time
Egg
Egg
Egg
Shake da egg
Rise my child
Oh
They steal traits from the animals
Oh they stack
Time to make an abomination
Waterfall cave
Chao cult?
Oh
Races
Enter the abomination
Crab pool sure
Level 1
Cheer them on
They are babies
Ah there are the crabs
These other Chao can swim
Got wrecked
OK maybe later
Prison island time
MY BOI
Tails time baby
Secret military base
Sonic would never rob a bank
Oh hi Amy
Amy needs help
Transformers (more than meets the eye)
Long load screen got me scared
Mech fight
Egg dead
Won't be so lucky this time
Ba ba ba bya byyyaaa
Amy here for sonic too
Tails got this shit
Tails needs no lady
Lots of robros
Lots of tubes
Big is trapped In a cell
What did he do
Free my man
Get him his frog
Sneaky bots
Level done
Gonna stop for now
See ya for the next one
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merci-bitch · 2 years ago
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The Coat Is Off
Lady Lesso x fem!reader
Warning(s): Not too detailed smut, teasing, it’s Lesso 🤷🏼‍♀️
A/N: My inbox certainly is overflowing !! Love to see it. And I haven’t ignored anyone ! I’m trying to start from an end and move my way towards the other haha. But it’s all good, keep em’ coming.
Not too long, and any mistakes are mine !
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For once, if not for the first time you had a break during the day. In between classes. Well, it wasn’t really a break. You had stacks of paperwork to get through, and things to grade. It felt like a mountain that couldn’t get climbed. It was awfully tiring but it had to be done.
You didn’t hear the door open, neither did you hear the sound of a pair of heels clicking against the stone floor alongside a cane. Too focused in your writing. You bit your lip and got up from your desk to go trap the other stack of papers on the desk by the window, only to feel someone grab your wrist.
“Seems awfully rude to ignore me, doesn’t it?”
It was Lesso. A sly smirk on her face as her grip on your wrist tightened. Lesso used her other hand to move the hair from your shoulder and leaned in. She let her nose move alongside your neck. Her warm breath on your skin sent shivers down your spine.
“Lesso I-I really need to finish grading these pa-“
Lesso cut you off by shushing you. Moving up to cover your mouth with her finger. Her other hand moved from your wrist, moved up your thigh and then between your legs, cupping you in her hand. You let out a gasp in response. You gripped her hand and looked at her. She had that glint in her eyes. A cat like grin on her face as she moved even closer to you.
“I-I have to-“ She cut you off once again with a kiss. Cupping your face with both hands as the kiss became more demanding. She started walking you backwards, pushing you against the desk. Getting you to sit on top of it, and standing in between your legs. Her one hand moved down your body, down your thigh and lifted up your leg to wrap around her waist. Her kisses grew more hungry. You moved your head back for air, for her to move her kisses downwards. She started biting at your skin, causing you to hiss out in pleasure. Your hands gripped her forearms, then trying to push her coat off. It landing on the floor.
Her lips found yours once again as her hands moved to your waist. You felt her nails through your shirt. She bit your bottom lip and pulled it with her as she moved her head slightly back. You let out a breath as she did. You knew that familiar glint in her eyes. They were dark and hooded. You reached forward to undo the buttons on her vest only for her to swat your hands away from her.
“Nah uh. No touching.” She grinned.
You crossed your arms and pouted at her. Making her chuckle. “Come now, sweetheart. We both know you won’t be complaining in a few minutes.” She leaned in to kiss you again. Your arms still crossed but you let her. “Don’t ruin all the fun.”
“Well, it’s not fun if only you get to touch.”
“No? You wanna make a bet on that?” Lesso said with a smirk. Leaning in close again. Her nose touching yours. “I have papers to grade.” You started to move only to be stopped by a clawing hand. “You’re not going anywhere, little minx.” She purred. Sending shivers down your spine.
It took a while for her to coax you into it. Damn her, you thought. You should have seen this coming. It was Lesso for gods sake. The way she’d entered the classroom? You should have seen it. You should have known you’d end up with her hand covering your mouth as her hand worked wonders between your legs. Enough to make your eyes roll into the back of your head. Muffled moans and gasps coming from your throat as she continued to assault your neck with her mouth. Leaving enough bite marks for people to wonder if someone had actually tried to eat you. The muffled sounds of students from outside the door didn’t help either. The thrill it sent down your spine was proof of that.
The closer you got, the more cocky she got. The more filth she would whisper in your ear. Your on hand was holding onto her hand between your legs tightly, begging her not to stop moving it. You felt your thighs start to tremble. Your eyes making that roll once again as she hit that specific spot inside you. Her hand moving faster, alongside the biting at your jaw; hit a very good spot and suddenly you saw white. The whole world around you disappeared as you entered a moment of pure bliss. You ended up biting into her hand to contain your sounds. A single tear made its way down your cheek.
When she removed her hand you barely got time to catch your breath as your lips were covered by her own once more. A hand on your lower back pushing you closer to her. A moan came from both sides. The paperwork on your desk scattered around the floor completely forgotten. It wasn’t until a loud banging on the door ruined the moment.
“Oh dammit!” You hissed, starting to get off the desk but Lesso wasn’t moving. She staring daggers at the door. You couldn’t help but giggle. You kissed her cheek and pushed at her shoulders. “Get moving Lesso. We still have students to teach.”
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spiderfunkz · 1 year ago
Note
for the prompt maybe natasha & reader living together for the first time like adjusting to there new life together? 🙌🫶
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✧.* it's not living if it's not with you
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— summary : in which you move in with natasha.
— pairings : natasha romanoff x gn!reader
— word count : 0,4k
— warnings : fluff, moving to an apartment together, established relationship, foul language, pet names, cuddling & kisses, reader works at the compound, liho cameo, not proofread.
a/n : hiii!! thank u sm for the idea i love it, i hope u like this little blurb <3
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you and natasha have been dating for a while now. you've met the redhead from work, knowing her since she first became an agent.
you've gotten to know her for the past few years as your relationship grew and grew, you would go on dates, and spend nights watching movies together or laughing about something.
you were more than lucky to have natasha as your girlfriend. loving every moment you spend with her, even the little ones. you love the late night talks you would have with her, the parties you would attend together, and the affection she gives you.
you've talked about it for a bit now and you decide to get an apartment together. it's closer to the tower and help grow your relationship with natasha even more. you've found a nice apartment thanks to tony's help.
it's the perfect apartment. having a nice bedroom, a large space for a living room and kitchen, and even an office for you and natasha to work from home. so with the help from your lovely girlfriend, you finally bought it.
so now, here you are holding 3 stacks of boxes filled with who knows what, trying to keep balance before almost tripping over something.
"you okay over there?" natasha smiled, organizing the things in the kitchen — "perfectly, fine." you put the boxes down gently, "i think those are the last ones." you sigh, rubbing the dust off your hands.
"can't believe we have an apartment together now." she holds your waist from behind, kissing your cheek. you hum in respond, melting to your girlfriends touch before hearing a thud.
"what was that?" you question before hearing a meow. "did you bring liho in already? i thought pepper was looking after 'em until we got all the furniture in." you ask.
natasha went over the boxes, picking up something, which turns out to be liho, "you did not." — "i couldn't just leave liho alone, just look at her." she held out liho to your face.
you couldn't disagree to the two angels in front of you. "fine, but that means were gonna have to unpack the boxes as soon as we can." you stated as nat nodded.
the moving process took 3 days as you got all the furniture in and decorations up.
you set up liho's cat tree as the cat jumps in it, getting comfortable. "like your new home liho?" you ask as the cat meows.
you stand up, walking towards natasha. "were all settled in." you smile — "you tired?" she asked, "i got the bed ready for you."
you nodded, checking your watch as it read 11:25 pm.
you got in bed as natasha layed beside you, pressing your forehead against hers. you are beyond happy to now be living a life with her.
"goodnight m'love." she yawned.
"goodnight, darling." you nuzzle close to her.
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lifenconcepts · 3 months ago
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Horrid Henry headcannons  (the show one, there is a distinction) (not going into the basics of him being abused or whatever)
Undiagnosed adhd.
Has issues with falling asleep and/or staying asleep.
Has probably gotten in trouble for doodling rude characatures of his teachers and people he dislikes.
Definetely snuck out a few times at night.
Love language is quality time.
Loves to get a rise out of others by pretending to like things that people find disgusting (like pineapple pizza) but in reality doesn’t like them either.
Loved to cover and uncover his ears quickly in a school cafeteria to get that funny audio noise.
Wears long clothes practically religiously to avoid being perceived.
Probably daydreamed of tons of things he wanted but into his adolescence wanted a car to “get away forever” or atleast travel out of home often.
Had a time period where he listened to the group “The Smiths”.
Loves the musical group Mindless Self Indulgence.
Is deep in denial about having self confidence issues, and tries to pull off the idea he has a god complex.
Had a burner phone he got tons of songs on and whenever limited in tv or other things can always rely to have the phone (since his parents don’t know about it).
Likes to collect CDs and loves to go to flea markets or thrift shops for cheap ones, for a few from finding them near trash bins.
Loves the night but is too wimpish to actually go out alone unless it’s to Ralph’s.
Hates anything touching his neck (clothing tags, long necks/collars, necklaces).
Has likely grown out a mullet at least once in his life.
Likes to dance unless it’s for someone or something.
Has been left home alone multiple times and learnt to deal with it well.
Neglectful when it comes to keeping relationships as he doesn’t really know how to show attention or love to ‘em.
Loves 80s synth pop.
Touch repulsed and yet touch starved, has probably cried from receiving a genuine hug (likely from Ralph)
Liked to hum or whistle tunes and often gets told off for it.
Has probably broken dozens of chairs before, accidentally.
Is the guy to volunteer eagerly when the teacher calls for a “strong boy” to help stack plastic chairs.
When riding a bike loves to speed up until his legs ache and then fail to stop in time and crash into bushes.
Likely gets into antics which result with him getting dozens of bruises or scratches.
Has probably bitten people before.
Would laugh at queers before realising he is one himself.
Secretly wants to put make-up on himself like how some rock bands do but doesn’t want to be seen in it as it could make others think he’s girly.
Parents don’t believe him when he cries and so he gets sent to his room when he actually needs some comfort and cries himself to sleep while hugging Mr. kill or a pillow, has gotten a conditioned response of fleeing the scene of feeling genuinely threatened, but can stand up to himself.
Confident in his abilities and at the same time thinks he’s the worst person to ever exist in them.
Likes to lick his own blood or pick his own scabs.
Likely aromantic (I get his distaste to getting married is just a kid thing but I like to believe otherwise). Also take the episode “horrid Henry looks at love”.
Liked to chase cats or other small animals but wouldn’t hurt them for real, maybe just aggressively pet them but not anything more.
Prolly listened to Radiohead.
Likely has a small collection of different scrap bits and pieces from toys and other objects he found outside, from random bolts to lost keys from unknown locks, to even shards of metal from a broken bus.
Has probably slept across two seats on some sort of family gathering.
Probably would be into kandi beads and loom bands.
Liked black and red checkerboard patterns.
Probably would wear goth/punk clothes into his adolescence years. From depictions of skeletons and bones to spikey collars and leather jackets.
Pierced his own ears.
Tried to at some point control the universe or atleast take over the world.
Has stuck a fork into an outlet before.
Online likes to pretend to be a real life vampire or werewolf and has told people that he lives in an old castle.
Sweet tooth!
In school liked arts and crafts and often made makeshift creatures or robots.
Would love to partake in certain after school clubs but isn’t allowed due to teachers thinking he’s always gonna be a problem child.
Has a medal he won genuinely and hides it as his most prized possession, only boasting with the one he cheated in/stole.
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happybird16 · 2 years ago
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"Give 'em here,"
"Hm?" Levi hums distractedly, briefly glancing up at you from his desk. A solid stack of paper rests on the dark wood, one he's been slowly working through for more than an hour. Eyes flicking back down to his current page, he grimaces, fingers tightening on the pen. Black ink continues across the page in a tight, stiff scrawl.
You approach his side, dragging your fingers across the smooth, recently polished mahogany. Unlike Erwin's gargantuan desk, his is a more conservative workspace, kept mostly clear besides whatever he's currently working on, a small candle in the far corner and the occasional steaming cup of tea. Sliding the white pages to the side, you take their place, plopping down onto the hardwood. Plucking the pen from his grasp, it quickly joins the pages by your hip. You reach out, miming a grabbing gesture like an eager child, "Your hand. Gimme."
“Are you really so needy? Already?” He sighs, leaning back in his chair. Running his fingers through his bangs, Levi glares up at you. "I still have 20 pages to finish."
"Nope," you say with a firm pop. "I've noticed you taking little breaks. Stopping to try to stretch your fingers. Give it here."
“Weren’t you supposed to be reading?” His eyes flick toward the office’s couch, your book resting closed on the middle cushion. “Couldn’t keep your eyes off of me?”
You smirk, “How could I, with you hissing in pain over here.” You wiggle your fingers again. “I think I even heard you whimper a few times. Now gimme.”
Eyes narrowing, his fingers twitch from where they're resting on his thigh. “Is this just some shitty excuse to hold my hand?”
Teasing, you knock into his knee with your own. “Like I need to ask?" This.. this whatever it is between you might be new, but it's nice. It's refreshing. Something easy while everything else seems to be difficult. "No silly! I’m going to give you a hand massage!”
His nose curls up, brows drawing tight. At his thigh, the digits in question curl into the fabric of his thigh. “A what?”
Holding your hand out, palm open in askance, you try again. “It’ll help. I promise.”
“Fine.” Finally his hand falls into yours. It's stiff, the digits held firm and tense like those of a wary animal.
Patting the back of his hand, you cheer exaggeratedly. “There you go! That’s a good boy!”
He clicks his tongue, “Don’t praise me like i’m some fucking cat.”
“Then don’t act like one.” Twisting the back of his hand to rest on your thigh, you interlace your fingers loosely with his, rubbing your thumb firmly into the meat of his palm. “Relax.”
With a sigh, he does, if only a little bit. Still, his shoulders are tight, eyes locked onto where your hand is wrapped around his, following the firm press of your thumb into the meat beneath his own.
“You have such beautiful hands,” you murmur, torn between watching your work and watching him watching you. Suddenly, you feel warm, anxious excitement prickling along your spine. You'd gone into this so confidently, you can only hope that it actually helps. “Have I told you how much I love your hands?”
His lips curl, a filthy smirk peeking up along the edges. “My fingers, yes. Loudly.” His fingers loosen, curling to press along the back of your hand.
"Ha," you snort, happy to see him a bit more relaxed. Stretching his hand out flat, you glide your fingers along the length of each of his digits, one after the other. They pop a little bit, small airy noises.
"You take such good care of your hands," you note, twisting it to press his palm to your thigh. He has callouses, that's for sure, rough little patches at the base of each finger. There's little knicks too, white lines of thin aged scars. A particularly deep one is gouged into the length of his pointer finger, right along the outer edge. Still, his skin is soft, you tell him as much.
He shrugs, swallowing heavily and watching you follow along his fingers, pressing heavily into the skin. "Just like to keep clean. You know that."
Huffing, you reply, "I'm pretty sure everyone on base knows that." Even his nails are pretty, perfectly trimmed without even a single bit of dirt beneath them. Even the cuticles have been pushed up. Dragging the tip of your finger along the perfectly smooth rounded edge of his nail, you note, "I'd love to paint your nails. It'd be like a good old fashioned sleepover."
Levi hums, eyes heavy. His hand is no longer stiff, relaxed completely into your grip. "What's that?"
You gasp, "A sleepover? You don't know what a sleep over is?"
His lips thin, somewhere between a frown and a scowl. "I didn't exactly have a normal up-bringing, remember."
"Oh," you breathe. Sometimes it's so easy to forget that his missed out on most normal childhood experiences. "Don't let Hange ever find out. They'll go on a whole rampage."
Levi rolls his eyes, "I'm sure. So what is it?"
"Hmm," you struggle, "It's sort of like a girl's night?"
He replies slowly, not quite understanding, "Girls..night?"
"Boys had them too!! And there were mixed ones! They were fun!" Hand still working against his, you trace your fingers along the boney lines on the back of his hand, watching the skin shift as you press into him. "It's like... pillow fights! And painting each others nails!"
His brows scrunch up in confusion, eyes distant as he tries to imagine the experience. "That sounds...fun."
Excited, you continue, "There were games too! Truth and Dare! Oooh and spin the bottle!"
Levi's eyes widen in horror, no doubt recognizing those as games the younger scouts play, often under the influence of heavy amounts of alcohol. "Hange would go on a rampage," he agrees solemnly.
Pressing his palm down into the meat of your thigh, you push into his first knuckle. It pops, loud and resonant, beneath the press of your thumb. Levi tenses, hissing at the uncomfortable sensation.
Heedless, you continue onto the next, earning another loud pop. And another. And another, until all five joints have been released. “It’s such a shame that your hands been bothering you.”
His shoulders dip in a long sigh, eyes fluttering closed. “It’s really not that big of a deal. It’s fine.”
Flipping his hand back over, you tug at his forefinger, quickly pulling the length to pop it. “You’ve been holding your fingers weird for awhile now. How long have they been hurting?”
“It’s nothing. An ache, if anything,” he shifts uncomfortably in his chair. As you tug at another one of his fingers, he grunts. “A couple weeks.”
You switch your grasp, pinching your fingers together and pulling along the lengths of his own, no longer popping them, merely soothing the sore muscles. "Do you think it's gear aches?"
He grumbles something under his breath, low enough that you can't really catch it. "I'm not some fucking brand-new cadet."
As with most physical activities, using ODM gear hurts at first. The constant grip strength makes your hands ache, burning with red hot pain as muscles build and callouses form. New cadets complain constantly about the pains, dubbing them 'gear aches' and constantly whine to the medical staff for lotion to sooth their hands until they can adjust.
"It's not just new cadets," you note with a hum, "Sometimes scouts complain about them after training particularly hard."
"I never even had them when I started out," Levi clicks his tongue. "Izzy had them pretty bad though. Had to find some lotion for her."
"Find or steal?" The glower you get in response is answer enough. You smooth your thumb along his palm, repeating your earlier actions and working the digit hard enough into his muscle to earn a grunt. "Of course you didn't get gear aches. Is there anything you're not immediately perfect at?"
Levi purses his lips, but you cut in before he can speak, "Ah ah, no self deprecating."
He grumbles something very quiet under his breath.
"What was that?"
He responds quietly, barely audible. "I'm shit at paperwork."
"It's just something new. You'll get used to it eventually." Levi's hands are so small, his palm wide and the fingers long and thin. The skin is pale enough that you can trace the blue lines of his veins, where they twist and curve along the back of his hand and across his palm. Dainty. His hands are dainty, graceful yet somehow still masculine. "Okay.. so it's not gear aches. What is it then?"
You can barely catch it, but Levi's eyes flicker towards the stack of papers by your thigh. At just the same time, your fingers catch a rough spot on the side of his middle finger. A callous. It seems to be newer, up towards the top of the digit, near the first joint. Wait a minute..
The realizations strikes you so fast, you can't help but blurt out, "It's the paperwork!"
Levi scowls, fingers twisting into your palm. He looks shy, ducking his head down. "It's fucking useless anyways. Why do those pigs need to know every time someone on my team scrapes their knee? Or fucks up their uniform in training?"
You stiffen your shoulders, pitching your voice low in a rough imitation of Erwin. "Levi, cataloging our mistakes is an important measure to prevent them going forward. A mere scrape during training could equate to a loss of-"
"-Stop. Shut the fuck up," Levi cuts you off with a small laugh, "That's such a shitty imitation of him."
You're happy to see him smile and the sound of his laughter has your heart doing somersaults in your chest. You pat his hand softly, "You don't need to stress so much about it. Most of it just ends up decorating some tiny little storeroom in the basement of headquarters. Erwin might glance at some of the more important ones, like incident reports- but the higher ups don't really care.
The fingers of Levi's free hand disappear into the inky blackness of his bangs, frustration oozing from his features, "If they're just going to end up in some musty-ass storeroom, then why the fuck do I have to fill out 50 fucking pages every week?"
"If you're lucky some higher up might even use the pages to wipe his ass," you chirp, enjoying the resulting snort. "Us scouts are scrutinized pretty heavily, ya' know. Sometimes I think Erwin is just desperately trying to keep us funded."
Levi frowns, "And so he's, what? Overloading them with useless nonsense?"
"Maybe? I certainly wouldn't put it past him. Something you're actually bad at is relaxing. Just take breaks every once and awhile. You don't need to do it all in one sitting." At some point during the conversation you'd stopped massaging his hand, instead merely fiddling with the lengths of his fingers. "Did the massage help?"
Levi grunts, "Yeah." His finger pat your thigh. "It was nice. Thanks."
"They don't ache anymore?" His hand is still limp and heavy, warm against your thigh.
"No." His hand rises, fingers stretching cautiously. "Feels kind of fuzzy, actually."
"That's good. I'm glad." You expect him to scoot you back to the couch so he can get back to the paperwork, but he doesn't. He just sits there, not wanting you to move. "If I had some lotion it probably would've been even better."
"Maybe next time," he replies. He shuffles in his seat, scootching forward several inches so his knees knock the inside of your thighs.
"Next time?" Your surprise is doubled when his other hand falls into your lap, palm up with back pressed to the fat of your thigh.
His eyes ask the question that his mouth doesn't and your fingers immediately start kneeding into the meat of his palm.
Next time.
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