#Catb fic

[tractorbeamofwoe]

Igloos Together | Blurb #3.1

Short little wintery Bondy fic to kick off the new year :)

word count: 557

***

This was the first Christmas you'd spent with Bondy since moving in with him up north, and the weather was full of surprises. So when you woke up one morning to see your garden covered in a blanket of fresh snow you jumped out of bed and practically threw yourself down the stairs to check it out.

Barefoot and still in your dressing gown, you stepped out onto the lawn, instantly cringing from the cold that shot up through your legs. You didn't hear him come down the stairs, but Bondy chuckled behind you and coaxed you back inside with a gentle hand on your shoulder.

"We can go out there, just promise me you'll wrap up first." He said, playfully flicking your nose with his fingertip.

Now fully dressed in your coat and boots, knitted jumper tucked into your jeans, you practically dived face first into a pile of snow that had accumulated in the corner of the garden. Bondy was somewhere behind you scraping together bricks of snow. 

Eventually you waddled over to him after flailing around in the snow and coating your clothes and hair in the cold powder. 

"Want a hand?" You offered, curiously leaning over his shoulder and observing the spherical wall he'd begun making.

"Yes please love." He said, taking a few steps back to admire his progress so far. He gave you a few pointers and you got to work, packing the snow into solid rectangles and stacking them delicately on top of each other. 

Eventually you’d developed a sort of system, you scrape snow into fairly even piles for him, Johnny does the more complicated job of making them into bricks before handing them back to you to add to the wall. You added the finishing touches by smoothing out the top and filling in the cracks with more snow to make it more “structurally sound” as Johnny had put it, before crawling inside. You both sat with your legs crossed, knees hugged closely to your chest as you chatted and watched your breath freeze as it left your lips.

“Hey, this isn’t half bad. I’d say we did a pretty good job.” You commented optimistically.

“Mhm and I think we should christen it with a joke”

“Oh god…” You roll your eyes

“How does a penguin build its house?”

You blink at him silently, preparing for the punchline

“Igloos it together” Johnny answers with a smirk

“I saw that one coming from a mile away”

“Did not.” He retorts like a child, playfully nudging you.

“Did too,” You argue back “anyway, ours doesn’t need glue. See? It’s rock solid-”

Just as you said that you knocked on the wall with your first to prove your point, however ended up putting your arm through the snow and causing the whole wall to collapse. Johnny chuckled as you struggled to free your arm from under the snow.

“Careful love, that could’ve been a lawsuit.” 

“Shame it didn’t all come down on top of you, then you wouldn’t be laughing I bet.”

“You’re right I wouldn’t, I’d probably suffocate instead.”

“You wouldn’t suffocate, because unlike you I’d actually be concerned and help you out.” 

When he eventually does rescue your arm from the rubble of your lovingly crafted igloo, he taps on your arm a couple of times.

“Hmm, looks like we’re gonna need an amputation.”

“Which I’ll pay for with the money I win from suing you.” You grinned

Touché

[vanmccannonlyfans]

what inspires you when it comes to writing? ✍️

i wish i had a better answer for this but i can’t really explain how a lot of the stuff i think of comes to me! i generally get an idea and start exploring different angles through writing and ruminating on where i want it to go and what i want it to mean! im very guided by the natural world and observing all of the beauty around me. i also get a lot inspiration through reading!

[pacifierbby]

77 days until i see this man again

[demadogs]

rb for sample size

[providnce]

I knew you were going to change your username but I was still like….. HUH? Who’s that?!!

My mutuals seeing this new url on their dash being like “who is this???”:

Oh, nevermind, it’s just me!

I literally did this spur of the moment as I am a Holy Fire truther, and strongly believe Providence is an S-tier Foals song. Like. They were so insane for writing that.

Funnily enough, I’m still getting used to it myself, even I have to do a double take when seeing my own blog 😆

[your-divine-ribs]

One For The Wedding Album Part 1

Words: 3.7k

I’ve been asked for Part 2 of this and it’s still in my drafts and I do promise to complete it one day 🌸

Imagines Masterlist Main Masterlist

"For fuck's sake! Who requested Mr Brightside again?" You squeal tipsily.

The music's pounding and your head is spinning, a giddy feeling taking over as you feel a large hand close over one of yours as someone tugs you on to the dancefloor and spins you around to face them.

"John, I can't dance anymore, my feet are killing me!" You cry over the music, but Bondy's not hearing any of it, shaking his head at your protesting, pointing down at the strappy satin covered stiletto heels that you're wearing.

"Told ya you should have worn your docs!" Bondy chuckles. "Never see ya out of those bloody things, so why should today be any different?"

You roll your eyes playfully at him. "Oh yeah, they'd look great with my dress! Really elegant! Sure Van would have loved that!"

"I know you could carry it off though lass... and I don't think our Van would have minded what you turned up in today." He's still got your hand clasped tightly in his, lifted up, his other hand on your waist, and he's leading you around the dancefloor in a much less sophisticated version of an old-fashioned waltz, twirling you around every so often, making your head spin even more.

You're on top of the world. You're with all your family and friends, the drinks are flowing and you've been smiling so wide and for so long that your cheeks are actually starting to ache. You're having the absolute best day of your whole life. Exactly six hours and fifteen minutes ago you'd said "I do" to the one man who you'd loved since the very first moment you'd clapped eyes on him. You're a married woman. And not just any married woman. You're Mrs McCann.

Just the mere thought of your new name is enough to set off that daft, goofy smile on your face again but you don't have time to ponder it for long. The whole function room bursts into song again at the chorus, screeching out the well-known and much-loved lyrics at the tops of their lungs.

Jealousy, turning saints into the sea

Swimming through sick lullabies, choking on your alibis

But it's just the price I pay, destiny is calling me

Open up my eager eyes, 'cause I'm Mr. Brightside

"No more... no more... my feet are seriously gonna drop off!" You whine, twisting yourself out of Bondy's arms, ignoring his pleas for you to kick off your shoes and just let loose, promising him that you'll be back to dance with him later on.

Your eyes scan the room, taking in wide beaming smiles wherever you look. Your dad and Bernie are having what looks like some ridiculous kind of dad-dancing dance-off competition, your mum and Mary are setting the world to rights over a bottle of champagne and your best friend and chief bridesmaid Kerry is drunkenly and very provocatively draped over a rather flustered looking Bob, much to Benji's delight. He's taken Bob's Polaroid camera and is snapping away, immortalising the moment. You giggle to yourself, taking a swig from your half-drunken glass of bubbly before setting it down on a nearby table.

Now where did that husband of yours get to...?

Husband...

You let the word roll around inside your head for a bit, trying it out for size, seeing how it feels. You even find yourself whispering it under your breath, a flurry of excited butterflies teaming in your belly as the concept starts to finally sink in. Today is just the start of it. The first day of the rest of your lives together. For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death us do part and all that jazz.

You're so caught up in your thoughts you don't notice the tall figure right behind you until you feel large hands on your hips, making you jump and whirl quickly around.

"There you are! Where did you disappear off to? Was just about to send out a search party!"

"Just been out for a smoke with Larry, that's all love. I'm here now."

Van's looking decidedly less suave now than he did when you were standing in front of the altar together earlier that afternoon. His hair's all mussed up, his tie's askew and the flowers in his button-hole have wilted, but the sparkle that's been simmering in those gorgeous blue eyes is still present. In fact he's positively glowing as he looks at you, deeply into your eyes before his gaze slips lower, shamelessly raking over your body.

You know that look. You've seen it a million times before over the course of your relationship. And you know exactly what's coming next.

"Fancy... errr... sneaking off for a bit? You know... just me and you... somewhere quiet?"

As he talks his fingers slide down to your hips, flexing there, his own hips pushing forward to just barely brush yours.

You smirk up at him. "Thought the whole idea of getting married was about you making an honest woman out of me?"

"Yeah well, I've never fucked a married woman before," he grins. "The thought's kinda turning me on if I'm honest. C'mon Y/N, no one'll miss us. I've been dying to get my hands on you all day since you walked into that church."

You shake your head, tutting loudly. "Impure thoughts in church? How very unholy of you."

"I can't help it babe, you look gorgeous in that dress. Don't even wanna take it off when I fuck you, wanna ruin you in it whilst you're looking all pure and pretty."

"Van!" You cry, your hand shooting up to your mouth, your cheeks aflame, giggling loudly.

He knows damn well how much his dirty talk turns you on and you're tempted. You really are. You glance around, seeing everyone dancing and drinking and having fun.

He's right, even though you two are the stars of the show today you don't think anyone would miss you if you were to disappear off for a little while. There's no denying the thought of Van pressing you into the wall of the toilet cubicle whilst he's hitching up the pristine silk of your virginal ivory white dress has set off a throbbing heat between your thighs, but you're having so much fun you don't want to miss a second of the celebrations. And besides, you'll have all the time in the world at the end of the night. You have the bridal suite booked with its gigantic king sized bed and sumptuous satin sheets, a mini bar stocked with champagne on ice and a huge sunken bath. You can take your time with one another then.

"C'mon..." he urges, that irresistible cheeky grin of his playing on his lips. "Ya know you want to."

You place your hands over his, leaning into him and planting a sweet, chaste kiss on those lips, drawing back slightly but staying close so you can whisper teasingly into his ear. "The best thing's come to those who wait... and you're just gonna have to wait!"

Then you're off, ignoring his protestations, entwining one of your hands in his and leading him in the opposite direction to his intended plans, straight on to the dancefloor where a Van Morrison track has just started to play. Bernie immediately makes a beeline for his son, stealing him away from you so he can clap a hand around his shoulder and sway drunkenly to the melody as they animatedly belt out the lyrics in unison.

Well, it's a marvelous night for a moondance

With the stars up above in your eyes

A fantabulous night to make romance

'Neath the cover of October skies

You watch them for a moment before Bondy's there again, reaching for you and twirling you around until you're giggling and dizzy, laughing and stumbling, falling into his arms.

An hour's past and the party's still in full flow. Larry and Bondy have been up dancing on the tables, Benji's been throwing some serious shapes on the dancefloor and even Bob's letting his hair down. You noticed Kerry sneakily leading him away to a dimmed corner of the function room after their slow dance had looked like it was getting a little heated. They're currently making out like high-schoolers would around the back of the bike-sheds. You wonder whether Bob will still remember it tomorrow when he awakens with a sore head and remnants of Kerry's lipstick all over his face.

Van's trapped in between two older female relatives who are fussing and preening over him and his eyes keep darting to you with a pleading "help me" type of expression. You just grin and lean in to take a shot with Bob's camera, laughter erupting from you when one of Van's aunts puckers up to press a sloppy kiss on his cheek, telling him what a handsome boy he is.

"Smile for the camera Van!" You chortle, ignoring the helpless look in his eyes when the other aunt leans and and starts ruffling his hair, talking about how it needs a good cut.

Then you're dancing away, taking snap-shots as you go, capturing those perfect and sometimes hilarious moments in time for your wedding album so that you and Van can look back on them in the weeks and months and even years to come, fondly remembering your special day.

"Oi blushing bride, aren't you supposed to be the one in front of the camera today?"

Kerry's suddenly at your side, snatching the camera out of your hands and turning the lens on you. You yelp in surprise but recover quickly, leaning in with your hands on your hips and a saucy pout whilst she snaps away.

"Oh my god Y/N, you look so beautiful today," she gushes as she retrieves one of the freshly printed photos to admire. "I hope Van realises what a lucky man he is to have you. I don't think he deserves you to be honest. Think I might just have to steal you away for myself!"

She hooks her arm through yours and makes like she's turning for the door, then you're both falling about laughing, holding the Polaroid up to snap a few daft, crazy-faced selfies. You're laughing that much that you've got tears of mirth brimming in your eyes and starting to track down your cheeks. You go to brush one away with the heel of your hand when you notice a black smear on your skin and you let out a groan.

"Ah shit! I knew I should have bought waterproof mascara for today. It was bad enough when I was sobbing at Van's vows but look at me now. I must look like a panda bear!" You turn towards Kerry, tilting your face up to hers. "Is it bad? Is it fixable? I must look such a mess!"

Your friend just laughs, shaking her head. "You look absolutely fine... gorgeous as always! If you don't believe me go and look for yourself!"

You gather up the silky layers of your dress and rush off in the direction of the toilets, cursing when you get there and you realise that you've brought Bob's camera with you in your haste to fix your make-up. The last thing you want is to drop his precious camera on the tiled bathroom floor, especially when he'd shyly admitted that he'd brought it with him especially tonight to gift it to you as a special wedding present to preserve the memories of the day. You place it carefully down on the side of the sink and step back to look at your reflection.

Your dress is gorgeous. Even as modest and unassuming as you are you can't help but admit that you do look stunning in it. It has a beautifully cut bodice embellished with tiny diamantés and freshwater pearls and a breathtaking full layered skirt which floats around your feet like you're walking on clouds. Even your less than sentimental dad had shed a tear and mumbled that you looked like a Disney Princess in it.

It's just a shame that the rest of you doesn't look quite so pristine now. Your hair which had been painstakingly curled and styled around the delicate tiara is now hanging around your bare shoulders in wild cascading waves and your make up is smudged. You're not even sure where your tiara is but you'd last sighted it perched on Bondy's head a few hours previously.

You run a fingertip gently under your eye to try and collect the mascara and eyeliner that's ran, but you just end up smudging it even more.

Despite what your best friend says in your opinion you look a mess... a gorgeous mess but a mess all the same... but maybe that's not such a bad thing after all...

Your thoughts stray to a few weeks back and a wild passionate night with Van after you'd stumbled home in the early hours, how you'd huffed at your reflection in the bathroom mirror and reached for a wipe to clear off your ruined make-up. How Van had snuck up behind you and grasped your wrist, telling you that no... he liked it... that seeing you all raw and disheveled like this in gorgeous disarray turned him on. He'd fucked you right there and then over the sink, pressing you into the cold hard porcelain whilst he'd grabbed your jaw, forcing you to look at your reflection, telling you how beautiful you were when he made you fall apart for him. The thought makes warmth rise to your cheeks and it's not the only part of you that's heating up.

You squirm where you stand, pressing your thighs together, feeling the whisper of soft lace between your legs, thinking about the stunning ivory set you'd purchased especially for this day. You just know Van will go wild when he catches sight of it. But not yet... he's going to have to wait.

Teasing him is so much fun though...

An idea comes to you suddenly in a flash of wicked inspiration and you quickly hitch up your dress and take a naughty snap in the mirror, angled just right to show Van a glimpse of the alluring treat he'll get if he behaves himself and bides his time. Then you take another shot holding the camera aloft and looking up at the lens through your smoky, smudged loaded lashes, wide eyed and sultry looking, your bottom lip caught between your teeth. Perfect.

You emerge from the toilets shortly after and you don't have to look very hard to find Van this time. As soon as your lock eyes with his across the dancefloor he strides straight over with purpose.

"Baby..." he drawls, dragging out the word slow and smooth, a hand curling around your waist, drawing you in. "If I didn't know any better I'd think my gorgeous new wife was trying to avoid me. Ya wouldn't do that would ya?"

"Of course not, I was just coming to find you actually. Got you a little... errr... wedding gift." You hold up the camera whilst you're talking and Van's attention shifts to see what you're holding, puzzlement creasing his brow.

"Oh yeah? What's that then?"

You produce the Polaroid photos, keeping them raised up and away from Van's seeking hand when he goes to take them, fixing him with a look that's pure seductiveness, ramping up the intrigue.

"Ahh, no you don't... not yet. Think you've been a good boy so far, so I'm sure you can wait a little longer. Just thought you might like a little taster of what you'll be getting later..."

Then you slip the photos quickly into the breast pocket of his jacket, nudging aside the flowers in his buttonhole, patting the material with teasing fingers as you look up at him, informing him that he'll have to wait his turn as there's another man who's been craving your attention all evening too.

As you back away to find your dad for that slow dance that you'd promised him earlier, you keep your eyes on Van, watching his reaction as he quickly slips the photos out for a sneaky look. Just as predicted his eyes go wide and his jaw goes slack, the unmistakable longing etched all over his awed expression as he meets your gaze across the dancefloor with a hungry look that can only mean one thing.

You're gonna get it later...

You smile lasciviously, your belly flipping somersaults at the thought of consummating the life vows you made to each other that very afternoon.

Sex had never been a priority in your life before you'd met Van, it was just another element of your past relationships that although enjoyable had never really filled you with the insatiable need that Van had sparked in you the first night that you'd met. He'd come crashing into your life one evening at a festival that you'd both attended, a whirlwind of chaotic energy and endearing goofiness as you'd both shamelessly fan-girled and fan-boyed over the Arctic Monkeys in their headline slot. With a very newly recorded debut album under his belt, you weren't familiar with Catfish at the time and would never have dreamed for one moment that Van  himself was destined to follow in your idols footsteps and burst into the music scene with quite such aplomb. You also never would have dared to dream that the sparkly-eyed, floppy-haired indie boy that caught your attention that fateful night would end up stealing your heart in such a way that he did, but yet here you were, five years on, proving all the nay-sayers wrong, embarking on the next chapter of your life together. You were perfect together in all the ways that mattered... and as for the sex... it was pretty mind-blowing.

You catch Van's eye as your dad twirls you around yet again, the opening bars of another familiar song sparking a memory in you. It's the song that was playing on the radio when Van proposed to you, another Van Morrison tune. He'd been planning an overblown romantic gesture for his proposal featuring heart-shaped balloons and dozens of roses, taking you completely by surprise when you were out at a planned family meal, but he just couldn't wait.

When he'd seen you there in the kitchen that momentous afternoon just over a year ago, kneading cookie dough with a dusting of flour in your hair and a telltale smudge of chocolate on your lips, he'd thought you'd just looked so adorable... so beautiful... so goddamn perfect... that he couldn't wait another second to ask you to be his wife. The sparkling solitaire diamond platinum ring he'd taken to carrying around with him for weeks had been quite literally burning a hole in his pocket, and he'd dropped down on to his knees right there and then on the kitchen floor, much to your shock and delighted surprise, professing his undying love whilst he'd slid the ring on to your finger. It had been a perfect moment, one that you'd treasure forever, slow dancing whilst he'd held you tightly in his arms, and your life had since been made up of many of these perfect moments.

"I hate to steal her away from you, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to cut in for this song."

Van's voice in your ear and his hand on your dad's shoulder brings you both to a halt, stilling your dance, and your dad lets you go.

He wraps his hands around your waist, pulling you in, close enough that your hips are touching as you begin to sway.

"Got you on your own at last," he looks down on you, dipping his head to plant a small, sweet kiss on your lips. "I can't believe we actually did it babe. Married... the two of us. This is it now... we're gonna spend the rest of our lives together. I hope you're gonna still love me when I'm old and wrinkly."

"Of course I will," you tell him. "I'll always love you... just like I always have. Think I did the first moment I laid eyes on you to be honest."

Van chuckles. "You sure about that? I was a right state at that festival! Remember when you said you wanted to get up on my shoulders and I tripped over and we ended up in a heap on the floor?"

You laugh at the memory. "And you also spilt a whole pint of lager over me if I remember rightly... then instead of apologising you asked if I needed any help getting out of my wet clothes."

Van face palms dramatically, groaning. "God I really was a creep wasn't I? What the hell did you see in me?"

"You made me laugh. You were just so goofy and cute... and adorable... even with the shit chat-up lines."

You drape your hands over his shoulders, looking up at him, your fingers twisting through the hair at the nape of his neck. "And now here we both are..."

"Here we are," he echoes, a faraway look about him like he's caught up in a dream. "And I wouldn't want to be anywhere else. You're the love of my life Y/N."

Again he bows his head to press a soft, lingering kiss on your lips. When you pull apart the grin he's wearing stretches wide on his face as he starts to mouth the words of the song to you.

"And when I'm returning, from so far away

She gives me some sweet lovin'

Brightens up my day

And it makes me righteous, and it makes me whole

And it makes me mellow, down into my soul"

You giggle as he takes your hand and twirls you around, happy and carefree. When you fall back into his arms, he pulls you even closer into his body, impossibly tight.

"She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love... She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love..."

He croons the chorus into your ear before pulling back to look deep into your eyes and the rest of the room seems to melt away. You're exactly where you want to be, it feels like the universe is aligned just right in that moment and everything else is just background noise, orbiting distantly around you both.

And in case you were wondering… this tumblr post was the inspiration for this fic! Part 2 to come…

[okayohay]

Never shared this vid I took in 2019 with anyone. But as I’m editing some chaps of the fic, I watched it for inspo and the camaraderie between these two has me in my feels, especially at the very end. Sorry it’s blurry ❤️

[pacifymebby]

born to die // chapter three

It was raining outside, heavy rain I hadn't been expecting but should have. After all I'd been watching it through the condensation of those red lit glowing windows only five minutes before. Only really moments ago and yet, that stage, my song, they all felt so far away then as we stumbled out the back door into the alley behind the glass bins. 

We were crouched down low to the ground, the little streams of rain which trickled between the bins and crates of glass waiting for collection. Both of us soaked through already by the heavy northern downpour. Frozen to the bone too because the wind had picked up and the weather was closing in on the city. I could feel my teeth chattering, my arms prickled with goosebumps as the rain stung my skin. I was scared too but I couldn't tell you anymore what it was that scared me. 

Whether it was the enemy crouched behind me, close enough to me that I could see his breath condense in the air around my eyes. His arm wrapped around me to balance me, his jacket open tucking me under the sodden denim as if he thought it would help.

Or if it was my uncles that scared me, if it was the thought of that rattling door handle. Of Van whose temper had flared so quickly when I hadn't replied. Because he wasn't a forgiving man and no good deed ever went unpunished with him, not if you were someone like Sam. From the wrong family and the wrong side of town. Not if you were someone like me, someone with a debt to pay, someone with a family who needed protection. 

The alley stank of piss and stale alcohol. Old kegs in stacks were the shadows that kept us hidden when footsteps echoed, Johnny's boots splashing through a puddle as he rounded the corner and shot up the steps into the back room where he'd have found me and Sam holding hands only seconds before. 

I flinched when I heard gunshots. I was surprised to feel Sam's hand on my arm, surprised to feel his finger over my lips as he shushed me. 

"Jus stay still lass," he breathed, "they'll think you've done a runner, it'll be reet." He said softly, his words barely words at all, breaths hanging crystalline in the icy night. 

But we needn't have worried about being heard, we were drowned out by the rain, kept safe and secret by the weather which was coming down hard on us both. 

We listened, crouched and close, bodies aching from the cold and the strained position we were balanced in, trying to hear the conversation being rushed in the back room. I daren't say a word, terrified that if I did I'd be tempting fate, that the hairs on the back of Van's neck would bristle and he would just know. Know that I was outside hiding with the enemy, that I'd betrayed him. 

Because I had. Perhaps I hadn't meant to but the second I'd snatched Sam's hand in mine I'd made a decision, one which favoured Sam, which favoured me. Not one which favoured Van. And in this "family" that was betrayal. That was the kind of decision you didn't get away with. 

And my uncle Johnny might have been soft on me, I might have been liked by the lads Van kept close, but it wouldn't be enough to save me from Van's wrath if I was caught. If we were caught Sam was dead, he didn't have to worry beyond that. It would be over so quickly for Sam. 

If we were caught it wouldn't be so easy for me. Not a girl who'd been mercifully taken in when her father had died "in the line of duty" not for a girl who's mother depended on her to keep the man with the red right hand happy. Van wouldn't kill me, he'd put me and my mother through hell. And we'd been dragged through enough hell when my father had been killed. 

So I remained frozen, letting Sam hold me steady, letting the rain soak me and freeze me to the bone. Letting my breath catch in my throat as my mind raced with all those future possibilities, the scenes which would play out if we were caught. 

We were lucky. It wasn't anything but that. A guardian angel, gods merciful smile, luck. Thats what saved us that evening, at least back then thats what I believed it to be. The work of god, of some merciful creator moving the pieces on the board in our favour. Protecting me or Sam or both of us. Of course I realise now that it wasn't that at all. That it was quite the opposite. Some devil at play, someone sent to tempt, to lead innocence astray. To make the world hurt more than it really needed to. To leave another violent stain on the page. Not that realising that would have made it any easier. It wouldn't have changed the way things played out. Once he'd made the decision to save me, once I'd made the decision to save him, there was nothing which could have altered the course of events, the tale twisting around us, all those delicate, dangerous threads beginning to twist and weave around us. Soon to pull tight and push us together, tie us together. Till death do us part. 

"Divn't be daft Van she'll be away home, poor lass'll have run for her fuckin life... reckon she's hidin under her fuckin bed petrified..."

"Then you fuckin check and you fuckin find her and when you do fuckin find her Bond, you fuckin bring her straight to me! Got it?"Van was foaming at the mouth, a bloody kind of rage I'd seen on him only too many times before. Even the ice of the rain couldn't take the heat out of his temper and as me and Sam remained frozen, teetering and hiding, we listened to Van light up a cigarette, pick a bottle from the glass bin and smash it off the wall across the alley. 

My breath hitched in my throat, my eyes closed. There were tears in my eyes mixed with rain. Sam's finger pressed carefully against my lips. This time he remained silent too, listening too. Listening to the rev of a car engine, headlights flooding the alley, blinding orange washing over the kegs which concealed us. Johnny was gone, driving to my house up the road where he wouldn't find me. And Van was lingering on the steps, smoking a cigarette. Stewing on whatever paranoid belief had had him barking orders and Johnny to go and find me. I felt a sickness wash over me when I realised. 

He must have seen Sam save me. Must have recognised the hooded lad who didn't belong to our family. Must have known I was in that back room, known that I wasn't alone. That I was hiding someone. That I'd betrayed him. 

So although we hadn't been caught Van knew of my mistake. A mistake which to this day I would hand on heart tell anyone who asked, hadn't been a mistake at all. Had been the only good thing I'd ever done for myself in the face of that family. Had been the start of the only good thing that life had or ever would give me. 

Because I'd been miserable until that night when hours after the fallout, when he was sure that we were finally alone, Sam had taken my hand to help me up, put his jacket over my shoulders and head to hide my face from the rain and the search party, pulled his own hood up and lead me away up the street as if we were just an unlucky couple caught out by the storm. 

"Wait..." I stopped two roads from The Angel, tugged on his hand to hold him back. Forced him to turn back and look at me through the rain, my washed out features, my make up run into my eyes so that they looked up at him a little reddened and bloodshot. 

"What?"

"Where are you taking me?" I asked looking back at him with a sense of disbelief, the evening catching up to me but only for a moment. Because I'd realised how lost I was. I couldn't go home because Johnny would be waiting for me and I wasn't ready to lie, was too scared of Van who John would surely force me to face. I knew I couldn't go with Sam, couldn't cross the river with him because his family knew me as an enemy. Because his having saved me would have been a betrayal as deadly as my saving him. 

"Nowhere dangerous," he said looking at me with a glimmer of fear in his eyes, his own face paled by the cold weather, the rain leaving a washed out rosy sting in his cheeks. His hair was dark and slick to his face, his hoodie was dripping a steady stream of rain into his eyes. "Stay out here any longer and we're both gan freeze to death..."

"If Van sees us..."

"Like a said lass the weathers my worry reet now..." he said reaching for my hand, trying to coax me back to his side. 

"I canna go with you!" I snatched my hand away, startling him because he'd assumed we'd skipped over the theatrics. 

"Aye a where are y'gonna go if you divnt?" he asked eyebrows raised, a small smirk tugging on his lips, like he wasn't half as scared as me. I could only assume that was because he had no idea how much trouble we were really in. 

"I don't know a friends..." I said quickly, trying to speak quick enough that he couldn't hear my shivered uncertainty. But he didn't need to hear it because it was there in my eyes on my face, on lips as they trembled not only from the cold. 

"Can't call the lad who just saved your life a friend?" 

I starred back at him in disbelief, a dumbfounded kind of shock leaving my jaw hung slack. 

"Come on lass," he said a little quieter, "a nar somewhere we can go reet, a place that ain't got a side..."

I glanced across the street, tried to consider my choice carefully. Tried not to panic. 

I could go back to the hospital, I could use the showers, get the spare clothes from my locker. But if he didn't find me at home the hospital would be the second place Johnny looked for me. I couldn't make anyone there lie for me. Couldn't put anyone else in danger because of me. And I'd lied about my friends. I wouldn't put any of their lives on the line either. I wouldn't force them to look Johnny or Van in the eyes whilst they lied for me on their doorstep. I couldn't do that. 

So I took Sam's hand. 

"There ain't a place in this whole city that don't have a side," I said softly, his hand just as cold as mine as our fingers linked and he tugged me in closer to his side. 

"Thats where you're wrong lass," he said with a small smile, "promise ye, you'll be safe n sound like." 

[fineosaur]

Cracking up at your tags on that Van quote post 😂 How are you anyway? How are you feeling about the comeback and what did you think of the new single? Xx

HAHA i had to, i can never hold it back, that��s all i think about when i hear those lyrics.

i’m doing good! so awfully busy these days with work and life. how’ve you been doing, E?

i will say the way i found out about catfish returning was through tiktok posts that kept saying stuff and i kept getting annoyed at all these people spreading fake news until i finally searched up randl’s ig and screamed. i’ve been SCREAMING non stop ever since the return.

i’m still in denial that they’re back.. like i’ve been shirposting about catfish on this account since before the balance came out so it feels somewhat jarring to have them back all these years later 😅.

i have to say the best part is that i feel like i’ve somewhat become more active on tumblr since their return cause i just wanna see all you guys’ posts hahahaha i’m OVER. THE. MOON.

[catb-fics]

🤍 your white shirt blurb means everything to me. I’m the most vanilla person ever but if I experience the desires in my head I’d be put in horny jail. I’m still a virgin but no man has ever made me horny besides Van so I like to believe Van’s taken my virginity 🫠

I often think about a quickie with Van eating me out right after the wedding ceremony! We’d have a few minutes to enjoy each other alone sat together giggling like little kids about being married and sharing sweet innocent kisses overjoyed. Hearing him say “good afternoon Mrs. McCann” for the first time and seeing him place his hand under mine so our wedding rings are on full view oh I’m smitten! The emotions would be so high and sex would be on our mind knowing we’d be too tired for wedding night sex. He’d know getting a wedding dress off and back on before anyone caught us is hard. He’d be underneath my dress skirt and remove my lingerie with his teeth. Not seeing him but feeling his tongue exploring and knowing he’s having a good time drives me wild! It wouldn’t be enough for him and getting his dick into me being our first team effort as husband wife omggg. I love the idea of Van having a breeding kink and condoms not being available so if I got pregnant on our wedding day we’d remember their conception too well

Years later Van would be coming from home from a very stressful meeting and need to decompress when he got home. I’d know him seeing me in my wedding dress always brought him out of a bad mood and run out to his car in it when he got home. Messy hair, no makeup just having put down the kids down for a nap then jumping into his arms knowing nothing mattered but us. He wouldn’t have time to complain. I’d be in his arms being carried to bed and ripping off his white shirt again needing to be a little mischievous from being stuffy snd serious all morning. He’d pass by the wedding photo on the wall and next to it would be a clever photo that isn’t overtly sexual yet suggestive, reminding him everyday of how madly in love we are

https://www.pinterest.co.uk/pin/wedding-photo-inspo--492649951792026/

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/wedding-picture-poses--281543720611082

🤍 anon you’ve only sent me a few of these but they are my favourite thing already! This is so cute and hot at the same time and I am 100% going to have to write this one as well!

I love these pics too - the piano one omg 😅

[tractorbeamofwoe]

Is Everybody Going Crazy?

Short spooky fic based on Halloween prompts

word count: 1,185

a/n: this was supposed to just be a really short like drabble but ended up becoming a whole mini fic. It’s mildly rushed towards the end so I apologise for that but I can’t believe this is the first thing I’ve written in so long, it’s kinda surreal to be back. Happy Halloween :)

***

“Stop messing with the lights, it’s not funny” was a phrase said often in your house. Ever since Johnny moved in with you and found out you were easily spooked, he’d gotten a kick out of scaring you every now and then. Sometimes it was him turning the lights on and off while you were in the shower, other times he’d make a sudden noise or sneak up on you.

Now, after having lived together for a few years, his antics seem to have chilled out a bit. You‘d moved house a few days ago (on Halloween, which was already stressful enough) and you’d made him promise to not do anything stupid while you got settled in. Johnny excessively nodded his head and rolled his eyes “I promise, I’m over that stuff now anyway.” He insisted.

Those first few days went smoothly. Everything was unpacked, the vinyls were all still in one piece, hell Johnny even found the time to play guitar for a couple of hours while you got some work done. It was at the weekend that things started happening again.

You were upstairs finishing off an email when the power suddenly went out. Of course, your natural reaction was to scream bloody murder. “JOHNNY BOND I’M GONNA KILL YOU!” You screeched, storming downstairs into the living room. You stopped in your tracks when light hit your face and you saw Johnny sat on the sofa unbothered.

“Lou I’ll call you back, Y/N’s freaking out about something.” He said, hanging up the phone and tossing it aside.

“Did you turn the power out?” You narrowed your eyes suspiciously.

“Did the power go out?” He looked at you, eyebrows furrowed, like you were crazy.

“What do you think?” You snapped then, frustrated and unimpressed as he smirked at you.

“Well I’ve been down here on the phone the whole time, so it definitely wasn’t me love.” Johnny grinned, before suggesting you sign off for the day and cuddle up with him while watching a movie.

By the time it finished the house was pitch black and Johnny was fast asleep. You decided to creep up to bed alone, feeling along the walls to find your way. Watching a horror movie probably wasn’t a wise decision as it definitely made you more on edge about the whole “house is possibly haunted” thing. This unease would continue for the next few days.

When you awoke in the morning it seemed Johnny had not come up to bed at all, though you could have sworn you heard him coming up the stairs in the middle of the night. You hopped in the shower in the hopes it would relax you, closing your eyes and letting the warm water run over your face. You reached down to pick up your shampoo bottle and pour some into your hands, massaging it into your hair. When you closed your eyes to rinse your scalp, the water turned ice cold, shocking your muscles making you tense up. Sure this house was a little old but it shouldn’t be doing that should it? Knowing Johnny he probably ran a tap downstairs. No biggie, just wait for it to warm up again. 

But it didn’t warm up again and you’d been waiting for what felt like half an hour, teeth chattering as you made do with the cold. You huffed in annoyance and decided to end your shower prematurely, warming yourself with the frustrated energy you used to confront Johnny. 

“Have you ever had any problems when using the shower?” You ask, eyeing him suspiciously while your wet hair dripped onto the hard wood living room floor.

“No, love. Why?” He said, not taking his attention away from his guitar which he was in the middle of tuning.

“Have you used the taps or flushed the toilet in the last, say 30 minutes?”

“Errr nope.”

“And you’re not playing a prank on me?”

“Ah, this again.”

“Can you blame me? I’m spooked! You didn’t come up to bed last night either, even though I swear I heard the stairs creaking.”

“Well if it would ease your mind, we can call in a maintenance guy and he’ll probably tell us that something needs replacing.”

So to calm your paranoia and quell the growing tension in your relationship you took Johnny’s advice. You were thankful for his nonchalant attitude about everything in situations like this. He had always been the logical thinker in the relationship. 

You called someone out to look at the boiler the next morning. The arrangement was that Johnny would be around in the morning to let him in and explain what was happening, then eventually he’d have to go to the studio, while you came home early from work to supervise until the guy was finished. 

A simple enough arrangement, but shockingly confusing for you when the man announced he had to travel to grab some spare parts. You texted Johnny to let him know of this new development and his response made you freeze up.

“He told me he’d finished up? I saw him leave.”

“But I also saw him leave. Why didn’t you tell me he’d finished?”

“Sorry love. Wanted you to take the day off and enjoy it. What colour was his van? It’s black”

“I don’t know I didn’t see. When I looked out the window the driveway was empty.”

“Darling, who was in the house?”

A few moments pass and when you didn’t respond Johnny texted again.

“Hello?”

“Go and check the boiler room.”

You clutched your phone tightly in your hand and took in a deep breath, as you slowly made your way down to the boiler room, appropriately and creepily located in the basement. There seemed to be a chill in the air that made goosebumps appear all over your skin. You grasped the door handle firmly and twisted, but the door was locked. You decided it was probably for the better and decided not to mess with it anymore.

There were no more cold showers, but it had done nothing to resolve the tension the both of you felt, even Johnny was now on edge. He started to believe the house was haunted too when you were laying in bed together a couple of nights later and you both exchanged a frightened look.

“Did you hear that?” You whisper

“Yeah…the voice?”

“What did it say?”

“I very clearly heard goodbye. It sounded like someone saying goodbye and it sounded like it came from this house.” 

“Do you think it was a ghost talking?” You suggested as a joke, but clearly your housemate didn’t take it that way. 

“Nah fuck this I’m proper spooked now.”

Whatever it was, it had clearly gotten bored and left you both alone. You never experienced anything out of the ordinary again after that night, but you had lived to tell the tale to sceptical family members and bandmates. But ghosts aside, the thing that always still seemed to horrify everyone the most was the fact that you decided to move house on Halloween. I mean, are you crazy?!

[sugarcoated-lame]

Hi! 🐇 and 🎲 for the asks

Hii lovely! I’m so sorry it’s taken me so long to answer these 😭😭

🐇 - do you prefer writing original characters, reader inserts, or a mix of both?

I think I prefer writing reader inserts, mainly because I want people to feel like they can picture themselves in the story, so I like for my stories to be as inclusive as possible for anyone who wants to read them! but also because I don’t really think I’m creative enough to come up with my own original characters and make them all that interesting haha

🎲 - what stops you from writing more in your free time?

Hmmm… definitely a few things, but I would say probably a lack of motivation/inspiration and just general writers block are probably the biggest things that stop me from writing as much as I’d like to. I always have all these ideas floating around in my head, but I tend to go through phases where I’m like really inspired and can’t stop writing for a bit, and then I’ll get stuck on something in a fic and usually end up going through a longer phase where even though the idea is still there, I’m just unable to get the words out properly and not really able to write anything lol 😭

Thank you so much for sending these, Em!! 🥰🧡❤️

[sadsackpostteen]

so impatient when you're not mine (3.5k)

Summary:

Jenson received a message from Seb on a Tuesday afternoon.

(Implied Cheating, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Mild Hurt/Comfort)

Mark was cheating on me.

He stared at the cursor blinking in the input box, once, twice. He wanted to type down nothing and everything at the same time before finally hitting send.

[pacifierbby]

I want him to tie me up

[providnce]

Really sorry to hear you’ve hurt yourself, hope you recover soon ❤️

Would it help if I sent Dr McCann and Dr Bond round to look after you?

Hahaha, thank you, this is hilarious! this actually made me go back and read that one doctor AU fic you wrote!

I've just found this in my drafts, but I got this when I broke my ankle in February-March. I'm better at answering asks now, promise!

Bringing this back bc I actually injured my ankle once again (opposite one) when I went to that gig last week. No worries though! It's better now, but I still haven't learned my lesson on being reckless in tall shoes. 😅

This is far from the first time I’ve had a shoe-related injury! Varying in degrees of hurt, after years of busting my ankles, I can finally do what I love… absolutely nothing!

[lydianthunderpole123]

Chapter 2 of Bruising is up!

Check it out and tell me what you think! <3