#Childe better come home in like 3 pulls omfg

[xx-justsomeguy-xx]

wriothesley…..

[ladyvesuvia]

where dust devils are made

PAIRING: tfatws!Bucky Barnes x Fem!Hydra!Reader

SUMMARY: Being tasked to seduce the ex-Winter Soldier to add him into HYDRA’s recovering arsenal turns into a wreck when the fine line between mission and reality blurs as you begin seeing him as your beloved instead of your ticket out of doom. (Loosely Based on Valentine, Texas by Mitski)

WORDS: 6.6k

REMINDER(S): usage of she/her pronouns. allusions to sex. manipulation. brainwashing. alcohol. trauma. major character death. cursing. major angst. fires. kidnapping. blood. abuse. violence. description of hair changes. hurt…no comfort hehe. errors. please let me know if i missed anything else!

ALTERNATE ENDING IN THE WORKS

-> for @pellucid-constellations’ love letters writing challenge! thank you for holding this challenge omfg this is what i needed to motivate me to finally write again. don’t forget to also check out their works !! <3

A/N: @maggiebuchanan sent me this fic idea and just knew i had to write it out so here it is. it looks a bit rushed tho cos i wanted to post on 2/22/2022 22:22 :’) || reblogs and comments are appreciated :*

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“It’s been you and me since before I was me. Without you, I don’t yet know quite how to live.”

— I Guess by Mitski

Being left behind to exist was a travesty of a luxury, a future lie to be written on history textbooks of high school students. Some think that life was better when half the population was gone, while some think so otherwise.

You, on the other hand, barely had any idea. How could you if you spent most of your five years in a chair for what you were told was going to become the greater good?

HYDRA had once been so overwhelmingly big, you’d know because you’ve witnessed it grow right beside the man who took you in when he found you a week after you escaped juvenile prison with no home to return to when you were reduced into a lowly lost orphan in the middle of nowhere.

Elrich Aslanov, the man who dared to renew and revive HYDRA, had fed you, raised you, hoping to turn your abilities accompanied by your fragile trust into a future weapon.

“My beloved child,” he had called you on the umpteenth downfall of the organization, determination and purpose clear in his voice. “We’ll rebuild all of this and make it ours.”

And then the Blip happened.

It was a dreadful situation and yet you had just wished you had disappeared as well rather than training to become a weapon for your so-called guardian’s greed.

You hated yourself for having complied in the first place.

You sensed the end coming forth until everybody came back and your new assigned purpose emerged.

“Lure him,” you were ordered.

By the time you had set foot outside to fulfill your mission of earning the ex-Winter Soldier’s trust with false promise of a romance, you had nothing else in mind but letting go of gratitude towards Elrich Aslanov and just surviving.

You had a plan to convince whoever this James Buchanan Barnes guy was to go somewhere far away with you. You didn’t know how to do it, but that was the idea.

Right now, you sat right next to your target, who was occupied in a conversation with an elderly man you did not recognize.

You hadn’t watched any rom-com movies or any movies at all to begin with, but knowing how to blend in was part of the job description.

You purposely ‘accidentally’ bumped elbows with his, letting yourself take on an innocent but playful demeanor. “Oh, sorry,” you say with an apologetic laugh.

The guy only barely nods, but the elderly man encourages him. “Why don’t you ask her out?”

“Yori,” he argues politely, refusing to return your insistent eye contact.

“Excuse me, this young man would like to ask you your name.”

Most of the time, you’d come up with some random alias or pull one out from your list of fake names but this felt like one of the times that you felt you should be genuine. “[Y/N]—”

You were about to say Aslanov, but it didn’t feel right, nor did your real surname. You did a quick scan of the place, your eyes landing on the drink the pretty bartender just handed to one adult at the other side of the counter. “—Whiskey. [Y/N] Whiskey.”

It sounded stupid, you knew that, but it gave you just the right amount of fake and real enough to stay true to your goal. No going back now.

Yori grinned, patting your target on the shoulder. “This young man here would also like to ask you out on a walk.”

“I would love that,” you said with the sweetest smile you could ever muster. You wondered if it looked real enough, because you knew /he/ was your ticket out of here. “Hey, I just moved into your apartment building. Maybe you could pick me up at five?”

Your target finally spoke, and it must be the two sips of alcohol from your glass but his smile was contagious even though it didn’t even reach his eyes. “Five’s great.”

And that’s where it all began.

That fateful late afternoon when one young woman and a not-so-young man separated by a wall had been nervous in the false comfort of their new homes.

The two of you had stepped out of your rooms at the same time, and you waved with more enthusiasm than you had intended to show.

“Shall we?” you said.

Your target nodded, and the two of you walked out of the building, shoulder up to shoulder as you went on a walk as the sun was minutes away from setting, the landscape about to dim soon.

“I’m [Y/N] Whiskey, by the way. You know, just saying again instead you’ve forgotten to save you from having to call me so and so,” you joked.

He seemed to find that amusing because a small smile tugged at his lips. Come on, give me a big one. “I don’t think I could forget that name. For starters, your last name’s literally Whiskey.”

Not really. “Yeah. Well, what about you?”

“Me? What about me?”

You shrugged, grinning. “You know, your name.”

“Oh. Right. Well, I’m — I’m James. Or Bucky. Whichever one you prefer.”

“Well, which one do you prefer?”

James or Bucky considered this, but he finally decided. “Bucky would be just fine.”

“Alright, Bucky would be just fine,” you started, racking your brain on what people usually talked about on dates. “How are you this fine afternoon?”

“Bearable,” he answered truthfully. His hands were in his pockets, and you absentmindedly did the same.

The sun was already setting when the two of you made it to the Brooklyn Bridge, the dusk a pleasant grandeur upon you. A lovely but polite conversation had come and gone and now silence hung, but it’s a comfortable one.

Cars bustling close by below made it a lot easier.

Bucky didn’t look at you when you spoke, but you looked at him, studying whatever facade he had on or let go of. Were you talking to the Winter Soldier pretending to be the remnant of himself or is he really who he claims to be?

All you could think about right now was how you only had to pretend to like him for the mission until he likes you back enough that you could convince him to go with you somewhere far away for a while so you could slip away from watching eyes.

You’re my ticket out of here, James.

He chose his words carefully, pausing. “I don’t think times are good enough just yet for this to be something I think you might want it to be.”

I can wait longer for a ticket.

“No big deal,” you said back, tracing the tight ropes with your fingers. “We did say it was just a walk, now, didn’t we?”

You could tell he was relieved as he nodded, seeing that all the tension from his eyes seemed to disperse. “Yeah, yeah.”

“So do you want to get out of here, go home, and get some unhealthy fast food on the way?”

And he nodded.

Maybe he really was just Bucky. And maybe he really would be just fine.

You could only hope that you would be, too.

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Making him smile had been a guilty pleasure hobby.

The jokes you’d tell were more often than not unfunny, and yet a tug on his lips or a mini smirk was just enough to keep you going for a couple of extra minutes for the day.

You’d been spending more time with him and it surprised you a great deal that it wasn’t against your will.

He was . . . good company. You weren’t sure what you were, but it wasn’t ‘something’ enough to be considered a relationship but not ‘nothing’ enough to be regarded as nothing at all.

There were days when he was unapologetically distant, and you didn’t mind. You always used his frequent absence to justify your inability to ask him about his days as the Winter Soldier, because you knew he hated that part of him and rightfully so.

He’d never mentioned any of it, but the drought of it was reasonable enough for you to theorize it so.

You had listed Elrich as ‘Dad’ on your contacts. He was the only one there along with Bucky’s number and Sam’s.

You almost dropped your phone when it started ringing, and it took you a while to register that an unknown number was calling. You picked it up after two more rings.

“Hi?” you answered.

“Mr. Aslanov would like to know the status of your mission, Miss [Y/L/N].” Your last name felt like a harsh reminder that you belonged to your past.

You gulped, pretending to not have been affected by the name. “Fine.”

“We’re gonna need a lot more than fine, Miss [Y/L/N].” There it is again.

“I’m spending more time with the target. No further information gathered just yet, Hans.” You knew exactly who you were talking to: Elrich’s right hand man who thinks he’d be in all his better’s glory.

“It will do you good not to refer to me by my first name.”

“Then it will do you better not to refer to me by my last. Oh, and have a wonderful day, Hans. It was most certainly a pleasure speaking with you, what was it? Hans. Farewell, Hans.”

And you unapologetically ended the call, slipping your phone into your bag as you turned off the TV just right after listening to the news about the new Captain America.

As you stepped out of your apartment room, Bucky’s door opened and you called out to him.

“Where you off to?”

Bucky looked back at you, slowing down his walk until you caught up. “To tell a birdie off.”

“Oh, I’m coming.”

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The day you met eyes with Zemo, you knew exactly what he could know. You’d been denying it to yourself as Bucky told his story of using Zemo as a valuable asset in their task and you had pleaded with your eyes not to tell anybody anything of what he knew about you.

When the plan to travel to Madripoor had been set in motion, you were having a debate with yourself on Zemo’s plane.

The you before you ever set foot in the bar James Buchanan Barnes was in would’ve fled the country the moment you stepped out of the plane and have taken a new identity but the you sitting right across from the same James Buchanan Barnes wouldn’t.

Something’s changed.

You had went from a loyal servant to your so-called pretend father during the entire period half the population of the world disappeared and long before that regardless of the cause to this young adult desperate for freedom, not giving a damn about anybody but yourself to some pathetic idiot blinded by the closest thing to love you think you could ever possibly have.

When you finally found yourself alone with Zemo, he had spoken first. “I see you’ve taken a liking to this life, Aslanov.”

And now that name sounds all too fake. Heck, all your names sounded so fake as did your real one.

“Would you snitch if I ran away right now?” you asked, looking around the indoor space Sharon had provided that not so really reflected what Madripoor really was like.

Zemo took a sip from his glass. “Would you run away if given the chance?”

You considered this, afraid of finding out where your loyalties truly lied. “I don’t think so.”

“Then I believe there is nothing to snitch about.”

He crossed his arms, and none of you met each other’s eyes as you studied a framed piece of artwork that was objectively not the most interesting one of the lot.

“Zemo?” you said. His light nod told you to go on. “Do you think I stand a chance at leaving my past behind while it still exists?”

“If the Winter Soldier can, then it is safe to say that it is not impossible. That is, if he really has. It would appear that breaking noses still come easy to him, I’m afraid.”

You chuckled lightly, taking off the navy blue blazer with sharp shoulders of sorts and toying with it. “Who was I supposed to play again?” you asked, thinking back on what your fake name was again to no avail.

“My mistress, Marina Fischer,” Zemo answered.

“You don’t have a wife — at least none that I know of — so you could only mean that I was meant to play your whore.”

“I was being polite, but if it is what you want it to be, then so be it.”

“I’m not keen on pretending to be someone I’m not anymore.”

“Then do you plan on telling your — what do you call them — your boyfriend who you are, Miss Whiskey?”

“He’s not my boyfriend and no, I’m not telling him,” you said. He didn’t say anything, and so you continued. “At least, not yet.”

“Then will you flee tonight to desert your mission?” Zemo asks, but it sounds more of like an evaluation for yourself than a question he wants to be answered for his own curiosity.

“Would that be a better option?” you laughed mirthlessly. “It’s just — it’s stupid but I think I—”

“Love him, perhaps?” he suggested, and the words almost sound bitter in his tongue.

“No, I don’t know. I care for him, alright? They put a price on our heads tonight but I was most concerned for his and it was such an odd thing. Probably the oddest thing, even.”

“Love is admittedly amusing but oftentimes harrowing. And might I say: misleading.” He stepped away from the painting to set down his empty glass on the table from across the frame. “Do what you will and must with that information. I’ll see you tomorrow or never, Miss Whiskey. Good night.”

Zemo began to walk away until he disappeared into the hall, leaving you stranded alone right there in front of a painting. You changed your mind; it was impressive. It wasn’t bad. It wasn’t exactly the best or anything, but it was mesmerizing.

You finally stepped away from the piece of artwork to study the frosted windows.

You could leave now despite the price you had on your head; you’d find a way to get out of there like you always do.

You could be yourself. Get away from all this HYDRA and super soldiers crap and just take on a last fake name to finally live your own real life.

But you don’t.

“[Y/N]?” Bucky said, snapping you back to reality. “I’ve been looking for you. How’s that bullet graze treating you?”

Because who am I without you now?

“Bad,” you said, patting your thigh. “You should’ve followed Sam, man. Like, come on, it’s in every action movie.”

He gave you that intense stare again, and you had to laugh. “Aw, it’s like you want to shoot me right in my leg. How very romantic of you.”

“Yeah, always a pleasure. Now, come on.”

His assisting metal hand on your elbow as you walked was comfort like you’ve never had before.

And you simply figured that that alone was already a good enough reason to stay.

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It’s been one of the most satisfying weeks of your life, you think to yourself as you toasted your own beer bottle with Bucky, Sam, and a couple of more people by the docks.

You haven’t been updating Elrich or anyone about your mission, but you’ve been reassuring yourself that it will all end well.

“To Captain America!” you cheered, encouraging the others to celebrate.

A while after that, you sat alone on one of the dock sections, your sandals set aside behind you as you let your legs play with the cold water.

Bucky took a seat right next to you, dipping in his water as well. The rest seemed to be preoccupied with rejoicing and having fun.

“Thought you were busy flexing,” you teased before swinging your beer bottle and chugging the remains down your throat.

He shrugged, sipping the last of the beer from his, too. “I could use some tranquility.” He set down the bottle. “Listen—”

“Look, I know you’ve picked up on me feeling something for you for a while now and that’s on me but. . . You don’t have to return anything, really.”

Bucky paused, comprehending what he’d just heard. “You have feelings for me?”

“What?” you froze. “No, I’m kidding, I’m just—”

“Will your answer be different if I said I do, too?”

“Yeah. In that case, no, I’m not kidding.” You put your empty beer bottle behind you right beside your sandals. “But if you’re kidding, then I’m kidding, too.”

“Well, I’m not kidding,” Bucky declared.

“So it’s settled, then. Nobody’s kidding.”

“Yeah, yeah, nobody’s kidding,” he repeated.

And the silence that followed made you want to drown yourself in the very water you had dipped your toes in.

But then your conversation with Zemo came to mind once more.

Your own words bothered you.

“I’m not keen on pretending to be someone I’m not anymore.”

You hated yourself for being a hypocrite. Here you are now, lying to him.

And so you decided to tell him.

Perhaps tell him your real name. That you didn’t disappear during the Blip even though it felt that way as you had spent most of the five years trapped in a hangar, training to be a better weapon.

You opened your mouth to confess all the lies you’ve been living since the moment you met but it was overpowered by another intense feeling you’ve been meaning to let out for another time.

“I’m just glad you’re safe, Buck,” you said. “I know you think that times aren’t good enough just yet for this to be—”

Adrenaline stronger than what any alcohol could give you pumped through your veins as his lips pressed against yours, your limbs becoming stranger to you, unsure of what to do next.

When he pulled away, you were left astonished, certainly uncertain.

“I know what I think,” he said. And for the umpteenth time that day, thankfully, he smiled. It was genuine and true, and it was comforting. “Times will get better if this turns into something I think we want it to be.”

And all felt as if it was well; that it could be better what with the smiles and laughter that followed.

Nobody bothered you, and you treated the mission like some lost sticky note, letting yourself be taken into this paradise you’ve let your ignorance built.

As the night settled after a long conversation with your Bucky, the two of you finally stood up. You thought of ‘Dad’ listed in your contacts and for a moment you considered throwing your phone away.

But you don’t, preferring to keep the photos you had just taken that day.

Instead, as you followed behind Bucky, you swiftly opened your phone and deleted and blocked Elrich.

You’d been behind by a few steps so Bucky slowed down until you kept up, and he held out his metal hand out to you, and you took it.

Because all would be well. He was the promise itself, the reassurance. And that was enough.

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He was more present in your apartment room than in his, and you didn’t mind. You’d let him fall asleep right next to you in your bed as you patted him until he did, let him help you clean the living room and change sheets. . .

It was lovely to need and to be needed for no selfish reason other than wanting to.

There were a lot of walks together, hanging out at the docks, and more for the past six months and so far, nobody has bothered you.

How would you know? You’ve never been alone, never been active on social media, or literally anything.

All your friends like Bucky and Sam were under the impression you had also been snapped away, and you’ve lied about this life so hard that even you had started to believe it.

“Goodnight, Barnes,” you’d say at night when sleep time is due.

And he’d unknowingly remind you of your innate fraudulence by simply calling you by a name not yours. “Goodnight, Whiskey,” he’d whisper as he fell asleep right next to you, his half-steady breathing the only consolation of the grim truth of who you were.

Every night, every single time he called you by that, you had willed yourself to come clean to him.

It’s just Bucky. He won’t hurt me.

But then you’d look down at him dozing off on your chest, his arms unwilling to let you go, his closed eyes peaceful as ever as it twitches.

But it’s Bucky. And I could hurt him.

And at every twitch on his face, you could feel your throat close, guilt eating you up slowly like a parasite.

You had no clue what happened to your mission and why your ‘Dad’ was not at all concerned about your whereabouts.

You’d almost forgotten you were there for the sole reason of taking back Bucky to be at the mercy of the very organization that treated you more of a weapon than a person.

But you let it be, locking that thought and letting it be summoned whenever someone called you by your name.

You never tell him about the nightmares of being tortured to be at HYDRA’s own beck and call, about the memories of being forced to remember each and every single time you took your seat at that damned chair without a single serum pumping your veins and agony one level from what your body would consider too much.

He never asked you about the scars and the remnants of bruises on every surface of your body at nights when love was fervent, just as you never asked him about his.

He knew you knew his story as the Winter Soldier very well, as well as the list of people’s names who he wanted to make amends with.

You could still remember the guilt and loathe in his face when he confessed the part of his own story he wasn’t aware you already knew.

If you knew who I was and why I’m here in the first place, you’d hate me forever.

It didn’t matter, though. At least, not right now. Not when nights are spent in the comfort of your Bucky.

Not your target nor mission. Just Bucky.

Again, all was well.

At least, until the evening of the next day.

You tried to ignore the star necklace you had found slipped under your door last week as you walked on our way home, carrying a crumpled paper bag filled with donuts to apologize to Bucky for a small disagreement you had, a peaceful night with your beloved in mind.

All this is disrupted by arms you don’t recognize hauling you off your feet and another set covering your mouth with a cloth that, for some reason, brought you to a sleep.

You awoke in a familiar place you recognized immediately.

It’s not easy to forget something when you’ve spent so much time trying to become someone you thought you were and someone you could be in that very place.

Hands tightly bound together behind you and tied around the backrest of the metal chair you were on, you tried to break free to no avail.

You were no super soldier, you knew that, but you were also aware that desperation, while pathetic, could be a genius alternative amplifier where escape was concerned.

“I thought you would have at least put up a fight, girl,” said a familiar voice. You had yearned for that voice to tell you you have done perfect, done great. But now? You wanted to rip apart the throat of the speaker. “You have been weakened.”

“No, I’ve become less stupid.” You looked up to find him standing beyond your reach even if you weren’t in shackles. A wet puddle separated the two of you, leaked rain dripping from the high ceiling.

“Weakened, nonetheless. But never mind your failure, because you’ve built a foundation well — finally something in your mission that you did not screw up.”

You hated to admit it, but the little girl who craved his validation was crumbling, and you tried so hard not to let her show up in your face.

“What do you want me to do, Elrich?” you mocked, and you took pleasure at the offended disbelief that flickered in his features for a second. You’ve never referred to him as anything other than Mr. Aslanov. “Your plan to rebuild HYDRA is a failure. You’ve got a hundred people including yourself and that’s it. Your pathetic dream’s nothing but a drawing of a kindergarten who thinks he’s cool. Give up.”

Hans emerged from the shadows, stepping right next to Elrich with a taunting smirk.

One of Elrich’s henchmen followed Hans, bowing. “The chair is ready, sir.”

The damned chair.

“Oh, we have a video to record first,” Elrich said; and it was weird to hear him without the endearing facade he’d worn back when you’d been ignorant. “Consider it as an invitation to the Winter Soldier.”

“He’s not the Winter Soldier, not anymore.

Elrich spoke as one of his henchmen prepared the tripod. “And you are no longer my loyal servant and yet here you are, soon to follow instructions once again. You are a coward, child. I expected more from you and you’ll now be painted blue and purple.”

Nothing new. Same old, same old. You could only watch as you waited for what would draw bruises on your skin and wait for it to end as the red dot blinked and blinked on the camera.

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Bucky Barnes received a package in front of his doorstep after three days of no answers at your door or your phone or any updates about your whereabouts, driving him crazy.

“[Y/N]?” he had always called out thrice each day, knocking on your door with hesitation.

He’d only figured you’d been busy or simply keeping your distance. You haven’t been yourself for the past week, and it threw him off.

He called Sam over, asking to borrow his laptop. And the two of them opened the only file folder, clicking one of the two files in it, the video first.

Bucky clenched his fist and his jaw, utterly disturbed by what he’d just seen.

There you were in the same chair, wearing the same clothes he last saw you in, skin marred by bruises and scars.

The video ran for only ten seconds, but each shudder of a breath you took and let go haunted him. It was a new kind of torture.

Sam turned it off, rendered speechless. Their brows were furrowed as Sam silently clicked the other file, the location written on it and the familiar star attached to the top part, and he immediately knew.

Bucky stood up in a second, and Sam had to hold him down. “Oh, you’re not going alone.”

“I am because I said so.”

“These folks are bad news, man. Them coming back for you can’t be good. You gotta think this through.”

“I already did.”

“For ten seconds,” Sam challenged.

“That's all I need. I’m going.”

“Well, not alone.”

As the two prepared, Bucky had gone into your bathroom to turn off the lights to make sure all was off as per your constant instruction embedded into his habit.

He was about to close the door shut when he looked up at the ceiling and saw one loose tile not quite fitting into place. He had used his own loose tile ceiling in his bathroom as a storage, and he figured that you probably did.

Bucky, desperate to find more things to remind himself of you, pushed it aside, finding a small tin box. He opened it with hesitation, uncertainty filling him up upon seeing the same red star that had been marked on his metal arm a while ago in the form of a necklace sitting on top of a collection of cards.

He pulled out the cards, your picture was on each and every one of them but the names were different.

Five driver’s licenses were under the names of Lauren Balskate, Mary Royce, Susie Lewis, Paulina May O’Brien, and Jules McConell.

Several more ID cards he could not count followed, names he did not recognize listed right next to your picture, each one unique from the other.

Sometimes, you had curly hair, sometimes straight, sometimes cropped, sometimes buzzed, and sometimes a vibrant color while sometimes not.

When he finished going through all the cards, Bucky slumped on the cold tiles of your bathroom floor, your face tormenting him.

“Who are you?” he says out loud, the past year flashing before his eyes, doubt clouding it all.

And yet he still stood up to look for you.

Whoever you were did not matter right now. What did matter, however, was who he fell in love with, and so Bucky left the apartment building with Sam, sworn to prioritize his determination over his confusion.

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The pair soon found themselves in a long hike up to what seemed to be in the middle of nowhere despite knowing it was in the Appalachian. Straying from the trail wasn’t recommended, but it was required to find the location, and after a few more minutes, the two glimpsed a hangar directing out a cliff with only an overly large runway separating it.

The Falcon and the Winter Soldier parted ways temporarily, Sam manning from above, following along and watching as Bucky approached the open and exposed entrance.

Bucky hasn’t even stepped inside when he heard Sam curse over their comms.

“Redwing’s been deactivated! Keep going, I’m—”

A bullet rang through his ears, the sound deafening and from a distant height of the sky, Bucky saw Sam’s figure fall for a couple of seconds.

“Sam!”

“Grazed a wing! I’m fine! Keep going, I’m gonna scout!”

As soon as Bucky stepped inside the hangar’s surprisingly modernized tech had the wide door shut in a quick moment and he sensed the hands before it reached him, but the hands still managed to rip the earpiece off his right ear.

The silhouette of a huge aircraft distracted him for a split second, but he swung his metal arm to the perpetrator, missing the assailant by an inch.

When his eyes adjusted to the dark and hanging lights flickered on his eyes met. . .yours.

You’d been dressed in combat gear, all your limbs covered as well as your neck.

Bucky found questions swimming in from everywhere as he dodged each hit from your dagger.

But you weren’t a super soldier, weren’t you?

How could you have taken that chair’s torment?

He slammed your hands away, sending the dagger skidding and so you pulled out your gun, pointing it right at him.

“You double-crossed me,” he said out of disbelief he could no longer hide. He immediately disarms you, and he lifts you by your vest, sending you skidding across the floor, your dagger across the floor.

His eyes flickered to the chair in the middle of the room. It was different from the one he’d always sat in, but its purpose was familiar.

“Get in the chair,” you said.

Fury pulsing through him, Bucky let the Winter Soldier and himself become one, not talking as he ripped off his sleeve to reveal his metal arm unabashedly this time.

“No,” he answered.

And soon there was clanging of metal against concrete, flesh against hard rusted posts holding the hangar intact.

He had sent you flying, and you crashed into the door shielding the entrance to the underground base of HYDRA, and he had to pause for a double-take to see a long hall stretch far into the other side of the room, make-shift offices probably inside.

You used the temporary distraction the base had gathered to aim for his jaw.

And the fighting took place once more above the hangar, the light from the hall he’d uncovered letting you see each other with much more visibility.

The ship took a huge portion of the hangar’s space, and when you recognized the pain coming from everywhere in your body, you realized you had some sort of control and with Plan B in mind, you refrained from reaching out to Bucky in fear of losing control of yourself once more.

You found the cockpit and you immediately took over the controls, preparing to launch it and setting your plan of destroying the base and letting it crumble into ashes and debris into motion.

When he found that it was within reach, Bucky grabbed the dagger you’d dropped a while ago and followed you up the ship, grabbing you by your neck just as the ship had begun to move.

The usage for autopilot was too soon, but you had gone for it anyway, the launch manned by a half-assed attempt at destruction.

“Buck — Bucky. . .”

“Who are you?” he asked, his voice tense with disgust. Another voice ruined for you. His grip tightened on your neck.

“It’s [Y/N]. Please. It hurts.”

The pleading in your voice almost let him do so, but he kept his guard up.

He hated the way his throat was constricting as he spoke and how his eyes threatened to become a broken dam.

“Are you sure you’re not Paulina? Susie? Jules?” he mocks. “Was it all just a mission to you?”

He tried.

Tried so hard to ignore the pleading in your voice. “No, Bucky, please, listen.” But your hands were moving of your own accord, and a goal you could never in a million years have presented itself. The chair. “Kill me,” you instruct in a plea for apology and redemption.

His grip loosened, and the part of you you did not own grabbed the dagger from his hands, aiming it at his neck, but you took hold of it as fast as you could, letting it drop on the floor.

You ignored him as you ran to the cockpit, steadying the ship, ignoring everything else.

It hurt everywhere.

The fresh bruises. The old ones and the new.

But most of all, the bruises you painted on his skin.

That part of you again.

Hurt him, it said. Do whatever it takes to get him on that chair.

“Bucky,” you said under your breath, but it sounded more like a wish than an attempt to call him.

But you were standing up again, and you — no, — your hand grabbed hold of the dagger, aiming it at him.

He stood up, and you were there, frozen right in front of him as a fight erupted within yourself.

It was like watching yourself from afar. You could only watch as you launched your body to him, and Bucky defended himself from the sharp blade threatening to pierce his skin.

When you finally found that you were in control of your own self, you spoke. “You decide if it was real for me too, because I’ll make sure you’re the one who gets to be free.”

And you let him turn the handle around and two gasped breaths came up from the two of you, your eyes locked.

It was almost like you were in each other’s arms in bed again and if you just squinted your eyes a bit, you could almost see it.

Only that red drenched your stomach, the handle peacefully resting against his.

You fell against him, and you felt and heard everything. Like the engines within the walls of the ship. Like the moving of the ship and the churning of your stomach and the weight of your faults.

You looked up at him again.

He expected you to say the words he’d dreaded and wished to hear just so he wouldn’t have to live with the thought that all the blood yet to be spilled would be for nothing.

He willed you to say Hail HYDRA in your last moments.

But you didn’t.

The wind gushed against the open doors of the ship to your left, and Bucky felt the howl of it too.

“My name is [Y/N],” you said as you tasted the blood on your lips. “And it’s been a pleasure to meet you and love you, Buck.”

Spotting familiar wings from afar, you pushed him off the door of the ship, aware of the life that awaited him after this.

You will yourself to move, the mind control fading away at every single step especially as you took your seat and manned the ship, taking a sharp turn and aiming the ship at the hangar where the underground base awaits.

Clouds had looked like mountains from where you were, and it was a good enough consolation as you abandoned the gratitude you held towards Elrich.

You thought of those inside the underground base and how all of this would be over soon and you tightened your grip on the handle as you watched the clouds from underneath while passing by.

From down below, he watched as your ship disappeared from tree to trees, headed for the base. He shut his eyes as tight as he could as if it would make it all better.

And he could only listen to the deafening booms erupting from the collapsing land from the ground he had landed on as Sam practically dragged him away.

He couldn’t hear his own voice as he called out for your name.

It’s been a pleasure to meet you and love you, Buck.

His eyes glimmered upon the distant sight of a forest fire.

➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶

[Y/N] [Y/L/N].

That was your real name.

It was almost as if he had loved a stranger he knew with all his heart.

Bucky spent the entirety of his days the following weeks in your apartment room where fragments of where your presence had used to be a permanent resident to cope.

He finally stood up from the bed to open the fridge, knowing there was nothing there at all, but he did anyway.

He was overwhelmed by a surprise he could not determine whether or not it was a good type.

Yes, it was a good one, he decided as he picked up the box of cake with only one slice left. A sticky note that had gone cold was attached on the top of the cover.

This is all I left you. Sorry. I love you, I swear. I just love this cake more. Kidding.

Bucky chuckled, the handwriting so you.

He then put the cake into a plate to eat it in silence only to leave the plate on the counter to run his fingers on the pictures and notes on the fridge held up by cheap magnets.

Stop emptying my fridge, idiot. Buy groceries.

That night, he went out for the first time to spend all he had to get groceries and restock the fridge.

The cereals, the milk, and everything. . .

You would’ve wrapped your arms around him and jokingly teased him for taking too long to do it.

Comfort, it seemed, was still in this room and wherever else you’ve been.

And that was enough for Bucky to help him sleep a little less worse for this night, and this time, he was no longer afraid to dream of you.

His [Y/N]. And he’d listen to all the voicemails you had sent back then to lull him to sleep. . .

click here to be added to my MARVEL taglist.

MARVEL TAGLIST: @shadesofvelma @raajali3 @justreadingficsdontmindme @flicksturz @pottahishotasf @ferrisus

[jungw8ns]

GOING TO AN ESCAPE ROOM WITH ENHYPEN !

PAIRING: boyfriend!enha x gn!reader. GENRE: established relationship, fluff, crack. WARNINGS: profanity (not that much tho), mentions of death (?). WORD COUNT: 100 - 200 each member.

HEESEUNG:

the two of you were so pumped playing an escape room together for the first time that the other people in line had to calm you guys down (which was trully embarrassing to say the least 🤐🤐)

he was looking at the ranking board filled with pictures of players that had succeeded in the shortest amount of time and he just wanted nothing more than to see both your faces on there

but anyways, we all know how competitive heeseung gets 🕴️

oh boy let me tell you, this guy WAS SPEEDRUNNING IT but not the kind you were thinking

the second the timer had started he was literally SPRINTING AROUND THE ROOM LOOKING FOR CLUES YET COMPLETELY MISSING THEM 🏃‍♂️💨💨💨

while he was busy running around, you were picking up the little details in the room and in no time managed to open a few locks

"y/n look i found– oh 😐😑😐"

HE WAS SULKING PLSSS 😭😭😭

when you noticed him standing from afar staring at you with his arms crossed, you called him to solve this one puzzle you already did

*gasps* "oh no! babe i don't understand how to do this, please help me 😔😔🤥🙏🙏"

he had to bite his lower lip to stop himself from letting out that cocky grin but it got out eventually

"oh it's so easy sweetheart, just put this here and then voila! 😉"

when the two of you escaped you suprisingly got to take a polaroid with him home after ranking 2nd in the records

heeseung was the one who held onto it tho, placing it underneath his clear phonecase for safekeeping <3

JAY:

GOD THIS DUDE

THE ESCAPE ROOM WASN'T EVEN THAT SCARY AND YET EVERYTIME YOU GUYS OPEN A LOCK OR A DOOR HIS FIGHT OR FLIGHT INSTINCTS COME UP 😭😭👊👊

"y/n stay behind me >:(("

"um, babe, you do realize that's just a door right?"

"WE'LL BETTER SAFE THAN SORRY?? THE STAFF COULD'VE PROGRAMMED IT TO GROW LEGS?? 😵🧐🧐"

you knew you shouldn't have played horror games with him a few nights ago cause he looked like he was about to lose his mind 😔

you had to shove his ass aside and move on to the next mission cause the both of you knew that he was stalling 🏌️‍♀️

jay was being extra clingy the whole time you were playing, he'd either link arms with you or hold hands (he's literally so adorable) 💞💞

BUT THEN YOU THOUGHT OF DOING A PRANK ON HIM

while you were roaming around the room trying to solve a puzzle, you saw this horse mask on a nearby table

and so you made sure jay was distracted and put on the mask

you could've NOT worn the dusty old thing but where was the fun in that?

"jay can you come here for a sec?"

you hid behind the wall beside the door frame waiting for him to come into your sight and attacked him

now, how about we guess what happens next?

a. he faints

b. he runs away

or c. he slaps you in the face and forces you to buy him food for the rest of the night

if you guessed c then YAY! YOU'RE CORRECT 🥳🎉🎉🎊

THIS HOE SLAPS YOU AS HE SHOULD

"$##/@+(+'£%(:?!!)&£**/*%@"

when he finally takes off the mask like those scenes in scooby doo he's never felt so betrayed in his life

"i- I TRUSTED YOU 😭😭😭 YOU BETTER BUY ME FOOD LATER, I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS, THE BETRAYAL???? LITERALLY UNPROVOKED?????"

he wouldn't stop side eyeing you until you guys finally pulled up on the mcdonalds drive thru

"hi, can i get two um– bts meals please? 😒😒 and two oreo mc flurries 🙄🙄 and also large fries 😐😐"

sane (1/3)

would be trailing behind you like a little puppy (i love him so much 😭😭😭)

he either has his arm linked with yours or held hands every five minutes

JAKE:

really focused on the puzzles he's doing but the second he hears you call out his name for help he's there beside you with the sweetest smile

but anyways, mans was POPPING OFF the entire time you were playing

he was solving problem after problem in no time (he wanted to impress you is why he activated his inner flash ⚡⚡) but he did let you play tho, the last thing he wanted to do was make you pissed at him for hogging all the games

def buried jake with compliments and forehead kisses right after ❤️__❤️

and so the two of you got out in like an hour and a few which you were very proud of

"you were so cool today babe, good job !!"

"aww thank you angel 😊😊"

sane (2/3)

SUNGHOON:

would be linking pinkies with you the whole time, only letting go whenever the both of you had to solve something that needed two or more people

there was this one game tho where he had to arm wrestle this literal hand lever to open the door to the last room (yea...don’t ask why, the staffs were pretty weird 😬😬) 

it made him enjoy the experience a bit more as it was only the two of you playing instead of getting accompanied by strangers

HGAWAHSGDHSGHDA PLSS THIS GUY

“oh this’ll be easy, y/n step aside, i’ll handle this 😏😏😏”

idk if you were supposed to think about how handsome he looked with his serious expression on and his veiny hands coming into frame or be worried for him because the lever was REAL HARD to pull that his veins looked like they were going to pop any second soon, you stepped in and helped him tho cause you were a good s/o <3

from a spectators point of view, the two of you looked like y’all were about shit your pants but the two of you eventually succeeded on beating it, immediately dragging him to the next room which had a sofa in it, laying down to catch your breaths

cliché moment ahead ⚠️⚠️

the two of you shared a few laughs before standing up on the empty space, held hands and started to jump in circles to celebrate your success 💃💃

yupp, y’all were never going back to that hellhole again

very stubborn at first, he wanted nothing to do with the game but then you held him at gunpoint by saying:

SUNOO:

"please just this once or else i'll revoke your mint choco ice cream rights 🔫🔫🔫"

"BUT IT'S SCARY IN THERE BABE :((("

"it won't be that scary sunshine, besides, i'll be ready to 🤜💥 yk?? trust me babe i would never let anyone hurt you <33"

kinda pissed since you blackmailed him into the place and also bc he wanted to play bumper cars and dance mania but he yea he caved in pretty quick 😋😋

(y/n let him play his games in peace tf >:(((( )

once you guys got in tho he realized how normal it was and that it was not terrifying at all

THE EPITOME OF CLINGY OMFG

he wouldn't stop back hugging you and you couldn't bring yourself to push him away to play the games so you just let him walk behind you with his arms on your shoulders 😩😩

(y'all were walking kinda funny but don't tell sunoo that 🤫🤫🤫)

yea the two of you ended up escaping with a whopping 2 hours and a few minutes

but it was the effort that counts so A+++++ for the both if you 😜👍👍👍

sane (3/3)

JUNGWON:

was the one who suggested going, he even searched on naver about really good escape room places to visit and was overall really looking forward it

he liked going to places and having fun with you so it wasn't a shock how his eyes were literally crescents and his dimples were so evident

yea he literally rushed the both of you to the place that you were the first in line 😵

while waiting for the staff to finish setting up he was playing with your connected hands like 🖐️✊🖐️✊ (so precious 💞💞)

"y/n why are you taking so long 😭😭 what if they close and we end up not solving a single lock, hurry up por favorrr 😩🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏"

when they finally lead you to the room he was kind of surprised that they had separated the two of you into different spaces (like the one with txt where they had the answers to the other member's puzzles yk???)

he was locked inside a telephone stand while you were handcuffed in the main room

dw the two of you reunited after a few minutes cause jungwon was rushing his lock to get to you 🤭

you both were progressing at an average pace and it made you guys a lot more closer (not that you guys weren't before but you get what i mean)

after you guys escaped the two of you went to eat curry and talked about the whole experience 😋✌️✌️✌️

this boy literally dragged you in the escape room with him

NIKI:

HE DIDN'T EVEN GIVE YOU TIME TO REFUSE HE JUST 😐👉🚪

"ok masterchefs, in order to test your abilities we must go through series of puzzles and make it out alive, understood?"

he tried ignoring how confused you were and went on to try and get you guys to escape

HE'S LAUGHING AT YOU FOR WHATEVER REASON AND OBV YOU LAUGH ASWELL CAUSE WHO WOULDN'T??? his laugh is so contagious pls 🤖🤖 he was so close to d wording cause he couldn't breathe from laughing too much

yea.. you guys spent so much time laughing at each other for being so dumb at this that you ended up playing 'till closing time

spoiler alert: he fails on doing anything cause the second you made eye contact with him this child collapses 😍🤩

GIRL SO EMBARRASSING 🤡🤡

THE STAFF KICKED THE BOTH OF YOU OUT AND NOW YOU GUYS WERE BANNED FROM THE PLACE ☠️☠️

"haunted house next weekend???"

"BET"

NOTE – god they were WAY funnier in my head but yeah.... i love them so much AND OMFG HAVE YOU GUYS SEEN HEESEUNG’S SELCAS LAST NIGHT???!?@??#?@?!?@ HE’S NOT REAL WTF ⁉️❓❓⁉️

also, idk why BUT EVERY TIME I SAVE A DRAFT the paragraphs get scrambled?? £!?) 6=6) 🤣😂💔💔🤣🤣😂💔 it's so annoying but anyways, ilysm pls stay safe and have a great day <33

[retroellie]

could you do an imagine/headcannon where ellie and miller!reader are traveleing to santa barbara and are being really flirty with each other (they always have been but this time its like amped up x100) and on their way back to jackson they confess that they have always loved each other? (happy valentines btw!!! 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩)

Summary: Confessing your love to ellie

A/N: Thank you for the request<3 This kinda got a little depressing and i'm sorry but i'm in the mood for angst rn AHSHJ. Anyways sorry for making you wait so long babe :( ily <3

Warnings: Blood and angst

Word count: 1.3K

-Even though this is probably the worst reason to be traveling to Santa Barbara, avenge the death of your father, you two still can't keep your hands to yourselves

-There was something about this time that felt more meaningful than it usually did

-Ellie would always pull bad pick up lines out of her back pocket and make you laugh

-"IS there a mirror in your pants?? Cause I can see myself in them."

-It was just stupid harmless jokes but now it feels more than that

-Ellie had also started touching you more, if that was holding your hand as you guys were running through a hoard of infected or hugging you as you came back from getting food

-You weren't complaining much though, back at home it was so lonely there without ellie

-You and her had been connected at the hip ever since you met, you even went with her to Seattle even if it hurt you so much to remember your dad

-After you guys came back to Jackson after Seattle you both parted ways, it left you heart broken

-Ellie left to go live in a farmhouse by herself and you got up and moved your entire life around

-You were able to go back to Texas and live in your dad's old house there, you fixed it up real nice... wasn't much but the only memory you had of your dad

-That's until Ellie came to you, all the way from Jackson to Texas just so you could help her cause you were the only person that was going through her pain.

-It took about a week to get to Santa Barbara and the entire trip consisted of catching up but also the awkward tension in the air

-It was horrible because ellie kept getting hurt but she kept pushing herself to her limit

-When she was impaled by the tree branch, you tried your best to clean her up and for some reason touching her bare skin made you blush.

-When y'all had finally found Abby there was a good chance you guys could kill her, she was weak and fragile

-You had been busy trying to fight of the damn group you had run into when you could've helped ellie

-When you finally made it to the sea, there she was. Bleeding, bloody and hurt... Just like when you found her in jackson that horrible day when you lost everything

-You ran to her, holding her like she would drift away. You watched as abby made her way into sea

-You didn't even feel like going after her, you didn't want to lose the only other person you had left

-"I couldn't.... Joel..." She could hardly speak

-"I know ellie..." You whispered back, letting some tears escape you

- You helped get her cleaned up that night, staying in a abandoned house just so y'all could rest

-You wrapped her fingers up real well, doing everything in your power not to hurt her

-You could feel her eyes on you, looking at you like you were the only right thing in her life

-She couldn't bear losing you, if you were to have died she wouldn't want to live anymore

-"You know I'm glad you came with me. i really missed you" She spoke, watching as you wiped the blood off her hands

-"I missed you too ellie, i had to get used to you not being there....it felt weird." You admitted

-Ellie's heart fluttered, she was so in love with you in hurt

-"How was texas?" She asked

-"Lonely" You stated, wiping the blood off her hands. "It was just how they left it 25 years ago, everything was left untouched."

-She watched as you spoke, her eyes flipping to your eyes back to your mouth

-"Sarah's room looks exactly like mine back at Jackson '' You chuckled. "It's funny how similar we are yet we've never met."

-Ellie chuckled along with you, watching as your eyes began to water

-She knew you were only hurting yourself living there, holding on to a simple memory of a man who was so much more

-"I wonder if it hurt him to look at me.... if all he saw was sarah"

- Ellie could hear the tears you were holding back, causing ellie to get on your level, hoping down from the chair and on the floor with her

-Ellie took her bloody hand, placing it on your cheek. She wiped away stray tears, smearing your rosey cheeks with blood

-"No." She stated simply. "I bet he saw a woman with so much purpose, he would be so proud of you y/n."

-It was then, right then when you decided you were madly in love with Ellie williams. You always knew but you kept it hidden, but you couldn't keep it to yourself anymore

-You smashed your lips into hers, not caring about the clashing teeth or the surprised gasp coming from her

-It was at this moment you could let go, of everything

-"I have been waiting for this moment for years." She breathed out, giving a huge smile

-"me too..." You admitted, wanting to pull her into another one

-"why didn't you say anything?!?"

-"You tell me!!"

-"I could've been kissing your stupid face this entire time?!?"

-Even after almost getting murdered multiple times today, you guys are still your stupid selves

-Traveling back to jackson felt quick, days gone by like minutes

-This time the trip consisted of everything it used to but more makeout sessions and heated sex... obviously cause it's ellie

-off topic but the first y'all finally have sex omfg, ellie is so shy and awkward with it like seeing your boobies threw her off

-Anyways uhhh moving on

-When y'all finally got back to jackson, you knew you two would have to split back up again. I mean y'all started 2 different lives, you couldn't just leave that all behind.

-Ellie showed you around her house, allowing you to pet the sheep and horses

-It felt nice, better than in texas where you had no one

-it wasn't until you found joel's guitar he made for ellie that you remembered you have to go back to texas... or do you?

-"I now understand what the bill went through... I mean losing someone and then coming home to an empty house." You stated, running your fingers along the strings

-"Minus the crazy paranoid part... right?" She joked, coming up to you to set small kisses to your head

-You chuckled, you didn't want to end up like bill...alone or did you already become him

-The coldness of the house that you knew was once filled with laughter of the two who had once lived there, something you had tried to recreate but only failing

-Walking along the house filled with pictures of the two faces that should be here with you, would Sarah even want you a part of the picture or would she want to be the only child?

-"I want to let him go ellie...' You whispered. "I'm holding onto a life that was never mine....i sleep in his bed for god sake."

-Ellie brought you into a hug, staying silent so you could get it out

-Ellie knew what you were going through, she saw it every time you entered a room.

-Ellie thought about how much she missed you and how much it would hurt her if you left her again

-"You could always stay with me.." She spoke, seeing your futures flash in her head

-She could see you getting up and feeding the animals in only your bra and shorts

-She could see you pregnant with a kid, cooking up dinner for you and her... she isn't quite sure how that works but you can make it happen

-She could see nights spent making love underneath the stars

-She would kill for that life with you

-"Really??" You said, perking up almost immediately

-"Yeah I mean.... i'm beginning to feel like bill as well."

-You both laughed, you both were so fucking ready to settle down and be normal humans for a bit

-"I think I might like that." You smiled, pulling her into a kiss once again

[cinderspots]

MIA WINTERS AU [PT. 3]

[PT. 1] [PT. 2]

Included: Mia Winters, Rosemary Winters, Mother Miranda, Alcina Dimitrescu, Bela Dimitrescu, Cassandra Dimitrescu, Daniela Dimitrescu

So after they deal with Eva pulling a persephone, Miranda takes Mia to meet the danger bugs and Alcina.

Donna's :( but Mia promises to come back so it's all good

Rose now likes Angie even though shes feral af and tries to bite her

Anyways

They go over to the castle and Mia thinks over the last few months and finally comes back to the reason she was sent to Donnas

Haha killed the father of my child for my technical paramour.

And she works herself up all over again and Miranda is just as bad as she was at the start so shes hoping Danielas home

Or Bela

Bc let's be real Alcina and Cassandra are worse than Miranda when it comes to humans

So they show up and not even ten seconds in does Cassandra materialize and tackle Mia, thinking shes food

Miranda legit whacks her on the head like a dog

Its hilarious

The whole family arrives and Bela tilts her head and recognizes Mia somehow

And then Mia is like: Hiii I was married to the dude that tried to murder you all, what's your name?

Yeah that didnt go down well

Alcina was ten seconds from just chop chop, oopsies she ded

Miranda stepped in and like explained in much better terms than Mia and then everyone was happy

Sort of

Cassandra was banned from going within twenty feet of Mia so she was in a pissy mood

And Mia went out of her way to get as close as possible so she'd get yelled at

Bela realised this first and immediately liked Mia more for it

Cassandra just had middle child syndrome the entire time

Daniela was cracking up when she realized it

Eventually Alcina realized Mia was being a lil shit and just walked away so then Mia had to like

Run

Miranda was sitting with the kids like: ayo I dont know how to do this help

So then Alci babysat the kids for a while and immediately was like, I am the wine aunt, fight me on that I dare you

Nobody fought her on that

Eventually Mia just fuckin pulled a lil stunt

An easy one

Not at all worrisome

Look Mia's stupid in stressful situations

She jumped out a window

Miranda almost died when she saw that omfg she got so panicked-

Alci just stared in utter awe at her idiocy

Bela was mildly concerned

Cassandra was not

Cassandra was full ass cackling

It was great

I lied it wasnt

Mia had a broken leg and Miranda was livid with her for that

This headcannon turned to crack so quickly wth

Then Mia bonded with everyone

Alci with the I'm a mom and I would like sleep but that's never happening because LOOK AT MY CHILDREN

Bela over sciencey shit

Cassandra over the horrifying events in her life

She basically just told her about Lousiana and Cassandra just loved the pain

Daniela and her books

Mia hates Twilight because that series is garbage, but she reads it purely because she is out of ideas with Daniela

And then everyone is just like

So if your dating(??) our (grand)mother, then are you also our (grand)mother???

And that was a whole thing tbh

Mia banned the word grandmother and all its relative names

Miranda was secretly like thank me bc I hate that they apparently called me that

Shes still very narcissistic let's be real

And then Mia was just chilling

Then Rose made a vaguely violent gesture and horrifyingly Cassandra decided she was gonna teach her some skills

That was a whole nother thing

But Mia checked out and made Miranda stop her

So :p

[btsslowburnfic]

The Arrangement Chapter 11

Series Summary: Desperately in need of money, you answered the questionable ad. AKA-Arranged marriage AU featuring Y/N and Yoongi.

Chapter Summary: You and Yoongi each share a little of your fucked up pasts

Previous chapter here

----------

The two of you entered the studio. Yoongi headed for the desk chair. "You can take the couch." 

You gave him a bottle of water and pulled the gimbap out of your purse, handing one to him. 

"Thanks. Now do you see why I don't go to those meetings?" He began to tear the wrapping off the gimbap.

"Yep. That was brutal. They literally just read off of the PowerPoint slides." You took a bite of your food. 

Yoongi scrolled through his phone. "We should go shopping tonight. The stores will be packed tomorrow and Sunday." 

"I don't mind. I can just go tomorrow or something." 

He looked over at you. "I don't do crowds. Let's go tonight."

You sighed, it was clear you weren't winning this argument. "Sounds good. What time will you get done with work today?" You asked, glad some of the negativity was fading from him. 

"I need to do some producing. But I'll try to take a break at 7 and then we can go shopping." 

You almost died a little at how normal and domestic this all sounded. A small part of you wanted your life to be so different from the fucked up life you had experienced as a child. This could be your life. This could be it. It's fake. I don't care. 

"OK sounds good." you finished up your sandwich. "I'm off to continue answering questions that people could easily look up online." 

"Better you than me," he said. 

You stuck your hand out for the sandwich wrapper and sighed.  "Yep. It’s definitely not  work befitting Min Suga genius." You teased as you exited the studio. 

Yoongi smiled and turned around to face his computer. What the fuck was happening? Two days in and he had already bought you towels and was getting ready to go grocery shopping with you. Might as well skip to the wedding at this point, he thought jokingly. At least then someone else would have bought the towels for you. 

---------------

Yoongi picked at his cuticles, his alarm was set to go off in a few minutes. He had done some mixing, but for the most part he ended up writing. He had been very inspired lately for lyrics. Usually it was the beats that came more easily to him and he had to seek out experiences for his lyrics. But lately he had so many feelings and experiences just itching to come out. 

He was worried after that night at the bar that you would distract him from his job but so far he had found the opposite to be true. He was thinking about you less because he knew you were in the office or the apartment. He wasn’t wondering what you were doing all the time. Not that he cared.  Not that he had thought about you all the time. And it was nice to have someone answer emails and calls, and deliver coffee. 

He turned his alarm off preemptively and stood up. He exited the studio. There was no one left on the 14th floor. That wasn’t unusual. He stopped by your desk. It was totally empty. He frowned. How could a person the same age as him have only 2 bags of belongings he wondered. He took out his phone.

YG: What’s going on with Ms. [YLN] work laptop? I see it hasn’t arrived yet. She needs it immediately to help coordinate my collaborations. Additionally, she needs appropriate stationary.

JW: Of course Mr. Min. I will follow up with the IT department immediately and let you know. As for the office supplies I can provide her with some basic stationary immediately. If you require personalized stationary the lead time on orders is 2 weeks. I can send a link to have you/her look over it.

YG: Thank you Jiwoo. Please do that.

Satisfied with himself, he put his phone back in his pocket and headed over to the elevator. He got in. A girl he recognized as Alice, Jin’s main stylist was already on. She had a make-up train case with her and seemed irritated. He gave her a nod of acknowledgement and noticed the button for the 18th floor was already pushed. 

They both awkwardly stood in silence for the short ride. 

The elevator arrived at the 18th floor. Yoongi gestured to her to exit first. She did and headed down the other way towards Jin’s apartment. He must have some event tonight Yoongi thought as he went the other direction to his apartment. He walked in, just realizing he hadn’t been home since yesterday morning. He sighed. It wasn’t unusual for him to spend days at a time in the studio. The first thing he noticed was that his apartment smelled like coffee and girl. It wasn’t a bad thing. It was just different.

He continued into the living room and looked around. There was a light on in the kitchen and a half-empty pot of coffee.  He could see a light peeking out from under your bedroom door. He took out his phone.

YG: I’m home. I’m going to grab a shower first and then we can go. You don’t have to stay holed up in the bedroom.

He walked upstairs, put his phone on the charger, and showered.

You woke up from your nap right at 6:58. Yoongi hadn’t struck you as the type to ever get home from work early so you hadn’t worried about being ready right at 7. You checked your messages and saw where he had texted you as well as Jimin. You pulled on some jeans and a sweatshirt and headed out to the living room. 

JM: 2 pm. Meet me in the lobby of the 6th floor. Bring a tank top and leggings so you can try on clothes over them. Also I HATE YOU WE WERE THERE UNTIL 5 OMFG 

YN: Sorry sorry XD I’ll see you tomorrow. Thanks again!

Yoongi emerged a few minutes later wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt and looking like a damn snack. “Hey.” He walked over to the kitchen and opened the cabinets to check the ingredients. He looked back over his shoulder, “Seriously, I meant what I texted, Make yourself at home. I'm never here anyways." 

You moved over to the barstool. "Thanks. I'm just so used to sharing small spaces with lots of people I don't really take up a lot of space. The coffee is fresh by the way. I had a cup before napping just now." 

Yoongi didn't really respond, opening up the refrigerator. The two of you were surprised to suddenly hear yelling and screaming in the hallway. 

"What the hell? "Yoongi asked, shutting the fridge and walking over to the front door. “Not again," he muttered under his breath. It sounded like a woman yelling. The blood in your veins ran ice cold, your tongue slowly turned to lead. You heard the front door open and felt dizzy. Suddenly you were in an apartment with Suho and there was screaming. You took a deep breath. No. No. That was years ago. You were in Seoul. You were safe. There were guards here and Yoongi was here. Yoongi? You shook your head, looking around. You started to panic again. 

The woman had stopped screaming. You heard the voices of two men and slowly staggered out towards the hallway. 

"What the fuck Jin?" you heard Yoongi yell. 

"I know. I know. She's just difficult."

"Your girlfriend is a fucking asshole." You heard a girl yell. You recognized her as Alice. She was pulling her make up case down the hallway and crying hard. 

"Alice I'm sorry. You know Lin is a little crazy. She didn't mean any of the stuff she said." Jin pleaded with her.

Alice was sobbing as she pushed the elevator button. "Tell yourself that, jin." 

You didn't want to stare. You felt wrong watching all of this happen but you were also numb at this point, almost experiencing it as though you were outside your body. 

Yoongi breathed in sharply. "Just go home Jin. But this is the second time this week. She needs some  anger management classes or something." Yoongi looked over and saw you standing there, peeking around the corner. 

"Enjoying the show?" He said irritated. 

You snapped back to reality and shook your head. You weren't nosy. You had been scared and didn't want to be in the apartment alone. Yoongi got on the elevator with Alice, leaving you and Jin in the hallway. 

" Goddammit," you heard Jin say as he walked back to his apartment. 

You stood there for a minute replaying everything that had just happened. You took a few deep breaths. Suho wasn't here. You were fine. Yoongi was fine. Apparently Jin had a crazy girlfriend. Alice was Jin's stylist. And Yoongi thought you were a nosey asshole. Great. 

You didn't feel like you could go back to the apartment right now so you decided to head out for a walk. 

-----------

"You don't have to come with me. You don't even know me." Alice sniffed. "I know how to ride an elevator." 

Yoongi shrugged. "Your name is Alice. You've been around for 3 years but became Jin's main stylist a year ago. You are hopelessly in love with him and his new girlfriend suspects. Tell me I'm wrong." 

Alice sniffled, her silence acting as confirmation.  Yoongi observed so much, quietly watching his coworkers over the years. “This is embarrassing.” She sniffled.

" You should file a complaint with the HR department. She can't just scream at staff members." 

"I'm just a stylist."

"Well I'll be filing a complaint. Her loud yelling is fucking annoying." Yoongi put his hands in his pockets and rocked back and forth on his heels. 

Alice laughed a little at that. "Yeah. She's fucking mean. They've actually been dating on and off for years. She yells at Jin too and he always just takes it. That's why she screamed at me tonight. She called him a worthless idiot for like the 500th time and I finally just snapped and told her to shut up."

Yoongi pressed his lips together. He never would have imagined that Jin was being verbally abused. He suddenly felt bad he had been so short with him a few minutes ago. 

The elevator arrived at the 7th floor where several of the girl's dormitories were. "Rest up. She's a bitch." Yoongi said to Alice as she got ready to exit.

"Yeah, thanks. Sorry I've never really talked to you before."

Yoongi shrugged . "It's fine." He pushed the door close button and back to the 18th floor. He had been so surprised to see you standing there. He didn't think you'd be interested in gossip, you had seemed so mature. 

He walked back into the apartment. "Y/N I'm back. Are you ready to go to the store?" 

Silence. 

He sent a message to your phone and heard it ping from the countertop. 

Shit. 

--------------

Yoongi walked outside. It was a little cold out. He tried to tell himself he wasn't chasing after you or looking for you. He was just out stretching his legs. If he happened to run into you, fine. But if not, fine. He reasoned that without your phone or wallet, you had to be nearby. He had left a note for you in the apartment just in case you got back before he did.

Y/N,

Hey. Sorry for all the loud drama. Jin's gf sucks. Text me. You still owe me jjigae.

 He walked through one of the little parks that stood between the skyscrapers and the river. He figured he would do a short lap and then head back. He hated the cold, he thought again as he rubbed his hands together. 

"Yoongi?" he heard a voice. He looked over at the swingset and saw you sitting there. 

"Hey," he walked over. "You left."

"Sorry, I needed some fresh air."  You responded as you watched your breath form in the air.

Yoongi took a seat on the swing next to you. "Yeah. Sorry about that. Jin's girlfriend is apparently awful." 

"Yeah. Poor Alice. I met her the other day, she seemed so sweet."

“How do you already know so many people?” Yoongi wondered aloud. He had been there for years and barely knew anybody. 

You shrugged, “I guess bartending made me good at talking to people.” 

“How did you get into it?” 

“Bartending? Well I wanted a job where I could work nights so I could also have a day job. And the money was really good.”

“That's always your main job criteria?” Yoongi said flippantly.

Rude. “That's a little mean but yea. I'm the main adult who has to support my two siblings and I've had to since I was 20 years old. I had to drop out of college so there's not many options. I haven’t had the luxury of choosing jobs that I might actually be interested in.”  

Yoongi felt like such a shithead. “Sorry. That was a dick thing of me to say. You’re right,  it would be nice if you could have the ability to do a job because you like it. Not because of the money.” 

“It's OK. I'm just sensitive about it.” You looked off in the distance at the river.

“You should be proud. When I was 20 I wasn’t able to even support myself, let alone take care of anybody else.” 

You shrugged. “I’m sure you could have if you had to.”

“No. I’m telling you. When I was 20 I was on my own. And I was homeless because I couldn’t support myself. So the fact that you actually made it work while taking care of people is pretty amazing.”

“Thanks. And wow. I had no idea. That sucks. I’m glad you’re not homeless anymore.” You looked over at him. You never would have guessed. You just assumed he had always been well off. 

“Right? That would suck.” Yoongi agreed, glad you weren’t turning his trauma into a big deal. “Yeah, I got discovered by a talent scout and BigHit brought me to Seoul and set me up in one of the dorms here.”

“Wow. I got discovered by some rich asshole with dimples in a bar, who I thought was running a sex-trafficking ring.” You joked. Yoongi laughed, while gently swinging. 

"While we’re sharing our tragic backstories, that's actually one of the reasons I came out there." You began. You figured if Yoongi was willing to share some of his fucked-up ness you could do the same. "In the hallway. I didn't want to be alone. People yelling and screaming puts me on edge. I wasn’t trying to be nosy" you thought about how to best phrase what you wanted to say next. "I was raised in an environment where that happened a lot. Yelling. Screaming. And things got very violent, very quickly, in our house." 

Yoongi sat next to you on the swings listening intently to your confession. He never would have guessed that about you. You seemed so well-adjusted." I'm sorry that you grew up in a place like that." He said, carefully studying your face." And I'm sorry that Jin's girlfriend caused you to be uncomfortable. I had no idea or I wouldn't have said anything to you about being in the hallway" 

"it's OK. Well, I mean, it's not ok  what happened to me, but it's over now. Thanks." you looked over at him. He was blowing on his hands. "Are you cold?"

"Yes, it’s freezing out here" 

You scoffed, “It's a little cold. Here," you stood up and put your hands around his before he could object.

"How are you so hot?” He asked, enjoying the furnace of your hands. 

“You know I look in the mirror every day and ask myself the same question.” You replied with a straight face. Yoongi wrinkled his nose causing you to laugh. “Come on. I don’t want to get fired for letting you freeze to death.” You pulled on his hands to get him off the swing. “Do you still want to go shopping?”

“Yep. I have the list in my phone. Since we’re already out let’s walk to the real grocery store. The BigHit store has an ok amount of things, but not as much as an outside store.”

“Ok, I need to go back and grab my wallet.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“But I--”

“You’ve seen my apartment. Don’t argue with me.” He started to walk back towards the city center. 

You sighed. Yes. He was super rich and you weren’t. “Fine. But I am doing this under protest.”

“Your protest is noted, come along, assistant. I’ll let you carry the bags.” NEXT CHAPTER

@lidda @anpanman-sonyeondan​  @firefairy1​  @cuteipat​  @sugaslittlekookies​  @janeelizabeth1216​ @deeepvibes​ @gxldenhunny​

[clearlyshyobservation]

Kokichi is dying (V3 chatfic, no particular ship)

TW: Infers abuse, talks about ableism, neglect, panic attack pretty much, depression, self loathing. never being good enough

i am so sorry but vr au's need to be sad, love yall :)

(Background info: This is set in a vr au, they are not with their fake memory parents (Ie; kaito's kind grandparents) but rather why they really have)

(Also i have no fucking clue what ship i was going for???? pretty sure they are all on the table, and kokichi talks like an idiot in this and i love it. Gonta's writing is based off of his Japanese talking style, so no more caveman talking).

USERNAMES:

(Space monkey: Kaito, Detective pikachu: shuichi, Elton john: kaede, Antman: gonta, Mr. Gonstealyoman: korekiyo, Atua's bitch: angie, emoboi: ryoma, be-boop: kiibo, bread roll: Maki, cum dumpster: miu, mommy: kirumi, Gremlin: Kokichi)

TLDR: Chaos ensues, slight angst

Gremlin: omfg im fucking sicK im gonna fucking die i bet this was kaitos bitch ass fault for coughing on me with his tuberculosis headass gROSSSSS I HATE EVERYTHINGGG

Space Monkey: i-

Space monkey: I didn't get you sick dumbass,,,, my tb is fugckin cured bi-

Bread roll: he's dramatic and gross dont believe him

Gremlin: yall mean for what?

Gremlin: i have a life taking disease and yall laughing i- 

Gremlin: see you at my funeral bitch

Detective pikachu: What are you sick with then

Gremlin: anythong bitch, im the universe

Antman: He sounds delusional, thats not good

Detective pikachu: He's always delusional, he's Kokichi

Mr. gonstealyoman: I guess this name is better than my old one

Mr. gonstealyoman: thank you kokichi :) I am glad we have come to an understanding

Gremlin: kay sexy

Gremlin: IGNRE WHAT I JUST SENT

Gremlin: IGNORE IT IGNORE IT IGNORE ITTTTT

Antman: who was that for???

Gremlin: NO ONE,,, 

Gremlin: Okay,,, maybe sexy tall men in general lowkey

Gremlin: okay,,,, maybe anyone over 6 feet 

Detective pikachu: i feel excluded

Detective pikachu: good, i don't like you kokichi, your an ass

Gremlin: u sound jelly shumaiiiiii

be-boop: perhaps he is telling the truth, you know,

be-boop: according to my data, in chapter four Shuichi stated that you will never have friends, and no one will ever like you

Gremlin: SHUT THE FUCK UP STOP MAKING ME FEEL BADBSKVKHDVKDSKJV

Antman: do you need me to come over? I can make you tea?

mommy: Do you know how to do that, Gonta? I can teach you?

Antman: Gonta does know, thank you very much. 

Antman: Gonta is not a child, Tojo-chan, please don't regard me as one

Antman: Gonta can cook, can clean, can be gentle, and has his own mind

Space monkey: but we're just making sure man, cuz, you know,,,, chapter 4

Antman: I am capable of things just like you!!!!!

Antman: Gonta doesn't know why you guys treat me like a child :(

Gremlin: yeah, hot stuff over there is basically a prodigy homies

Antman: Gonta is dumb though, don't say that.

Antman: Gonta is no prodigy, in fact, he is below average in everything

Gremlin: Whats ur test scores bitch

Antman: Gonta got a 98 on my english test,, but i wanted a 100, which would make Gonta actually smart :( 

Antman: Gonta is not good enough to be friends with you all

Antman: I can do basic stuff like tojo said...

Antman: maybe i do need help?

Antman: im not sure anymore:((((

Gremlin: THEY ARE ABLEIST GONTA,,, THEY FEEL SUPERIOR FOR TREATING UUUUU LIKE A CHILD

Detective pikachu: You sound really delusional Kokichi, maybe you should get sleep

Gremlin: S T F U, IM SPITTING ST8 FACTS BITCH

Detective pikachu: Sure you are. Now get some rest. 

Gremlin: GRRRR WHY WONT YOU LISTEN TO ME YOU IDIOTS??

Bread roll: Cause your stupid and aggressive

Gremlin: your personality, basically?

Bread roll: shut up at least i have a boyfriend

Gremlin: Technically, you just stole my frienemy 

Gremlin: Yall do be avoiding each other doe

Space Monkey: WE ARE NOT

Gremlin: Yeah yeah

Gremlin: yesterday i saw you to enter the same cafe by accident, duck your heads, then sit across the cafe from each other, all while  avoiding eye contact

Gremlin: Soooo,,, things not going well in paradise?

Detective pikachu: you're nosy

Gremlin: says the literal detective 

Space monkey: everythings fine your just a dickkkk

Gremlin: "oooo! Im momo-chan, i say bad word and go brrrrr"

Space monkey: im going to fucking stab him 

Gremlin: You cant, ive already enslaved you with my chaotic, yet cute hijinks, havent i~

Space monkey: STOP STOP NO NOT THE SQUIGLY

Gremlin: is it the sex? WHY DONT YOU MAKE EYE CNOTACT WITH UR LADY NO MORE 

Space monkey: ITS NOT THE SEX I HATE YOU

Gremlin: im free by the way at 8 ;)

Bread roll: STOP trying to steal my boyfriend kokichi, ive told you this before

Bread roll: NO

Bread roll: BODY

Antman: Gonta interrupts to say, Gonta loves you kokichi, and we should get flowers together, than maybe we can prank some people :D 

Bread roll: Ive never wanted to stab you more, gonta

Gremlin: I'd enjoy that very much, fine fellow ;)

Gremlin: but idk,,,, can you like take care of me first, cuz IM SICK BECAUSE OF KAITO TUBERCULOSIS ASS

Space monkey: I DONT HAVE TB ANYMORE

Gremlin: SURE YOU DONT 

Space monkey: I DONT

Gremlin:  BUT GUESS WHAT

Gremlin: YOU STILL SMOKE DUMBASS AND THATS NOT GOOD FOR U OR YOUR TUBERCULOSIS

Detective pikachu: He smokes?

Atua's bitch: he does, i walked in on him in the bathroom lmao

Atua's bitch: he was scared shitless and threw it out the window, needless to say atua does nt approve

Gremlin: DO YOU EVEN HAVE THE VACCINE????

Space monkey: Uh,,, i was taught vaccines were bad, so no i don't have the vaccine

Gremlin: I HATE OLD PEOPLE

Gremlin: ABOLISH OLD PEOPLEEEE

Gremlin: THEY SPREAD MISINFORMATION AND IT PHISCALLY HURTS ME TO SEEEEEE

Space monkey: your dramatic, it cant be that bad

Gremlin: say that when you catch it again

Gremlin: i swear you coughed on me like,,,, 5 weeks ago tho

Antman: OOOO! Fun fact: Tuberculosis can lay dormant from 3 months to a few years! 

Space monkey: u guys are just trying to scare me

Bread roll: Just checked the chat after using the br and,,m YOUDONT HAVE YOU VACCINES???

Detective pikachu: Im sorry, but kaito, please,,,,, for the love of god get vaccines

Space monkey: alright alright, ill do it cuz you guys are all on my case and i don't like being the villain :(

Gremlin: Im so happy i have gonta with me rn, he is making me tea while yall rot in your distant ass relationship (THIS IS FOR YOU KAITO)

Space monkey: Im going to destroy your bloodline in about three seconds if you dont stfu right fucking now

Gremlin: Hhehe i have an inaprwopwiate joke uwu

emoboi: STOP PLEASE DEAR GOD

cum dumpster: wHAt Is iT YOU WHORE

Gremlin: i was gonna say wouldn't he need to like,,,, have sex with my family to weed out my bloodline or something??

cum dumpster: i-

cum dumpster: Why am i acting surprised, ive watched porn with more extravagant plots than this

cum dumpster: ie; are you guys FUCKING? RIGHT INFRONT OF MY SALAD??? is one i will cherish with my soul

emoboi: hehe why did she point out the salad

Space monkey: I hate u kokichi, i truly do

Gremlin: I bet if you got the chance u would kiss me space boy :P

Bread roll has left the chat

Space monkey: o god is she ddoing one of those bf loyalty tests or smthing???

Space monkey: now im nervous lmao

Gremlin: why you so nervous stupid~~~~

Gremlin: It not like ur cheating on her homie

Space monkey: It's just a placebo effect

Gremlin: My brain feels fried Momo-chan,, i don't understand big boy words right now

Space monkey: Basically, if you take a pill that doesn't do anything but you don't know that and believe it does, you will scientifically start to feel better

Gremlin: first and only time saying this, but thank you 

Space monkey: HEHEHEB YOU SAID THANK YOU YOU SAID THANK YOUYOU SAID THANK YOUYOU SAID THANK YOUYOU SAID THANK YOU

Gremlin: Kaito,,, imma need you to do me a favor and look up on your ceiling

Space monkey: i hate you, idk what it is, but i hte you

Gremlin: good <3

Space monkey: HE REPLACED ALL MY THE STARS ON MY CELING WITH FUCKIBG DICKSSS

Space monkey: THIS IS THE LST FUCKING STRAW IM GONNA LOSE IT

Space monkey: IF MY GRANDPARENTS SEE THIS BULLSHIT THEY ARE GOING TO KILL ME, SLAP ME, MAYBE BREAK MY NECK AND DESTROY MEE

Space monkey: Im GENUINLEY panicing HOW TF am i gona get this off my wal???? They are going to bbat me senselpess help me shUichi

Detective pikachu: o god, i can sense the sheer pain and scaredness in  that tet, 

Detective pikachu: are you for real gong to get hurt or are you pulling a kokichi?

Space monkey: FUCKING HELP ME IM NOT FUCKING JOKINGKABKCB HELP THEY ARE NOT HOME RN THEY ARE LIKEE,,,, 40 MINUTES AWAY PLEASEE 

Gremlin: okay,,, maybe this wasn't the best prank.,,, i guess i'll help clean up cuz im not that much of a sociopath

Gremlin: tbh my parents can go shove it too lowkey terrible 0/10 

Space monkey: AHHHH IM SO SCARED PLS PSL GET HERE FAST

be-boop: Of course, i will come, i will survey the outside of the house

Antman: Gonta is coming too! We will get this done in under 40 minutes!

Space monkey: OKAY

Gremlin: Lowkey, if i cough on you ignore it bitch your the one who made me like this

Space monkey: W HA TDONT COUGH ON ME IM NOT SICK ANYMORE

Gremlin: I will give you TB again just cuz your making me suffer

Space monkey: Suffer what??? putting dicks on my FUCKING WALL???

Gremlin: Guilt, idiot, im feeling guilty. 

cum dumpster: oof thats new

emoboi: yeah i wasn't expecting it

Mr.gonstealyoman: Me neither. It is rather peculiar seeing it being texted by him because he is always feels not guilty of his bad actions.

be-boop: I do believe he means it, though...

emoboi: impossible.

cum dumpster: i agree, literally impossible.

Gremlin: I HAVE A FUCKIBG SOUL YOU CRazY CONSPIRACISTS

Antman: Quick question, shuichi can i stay with you again? It'll be dark when i get home and gonta can't do that so,,, please help

Detective pikachu: my parents are like blank slates, who eat slowly, watch tv slowly, and never look at me. Im sure they wouldn't mind :P

Antman: ALRIGHT! :D LETS GET MISSION: MR. MOMOTA ROOM REPAIR DONE!

Gremlin: ooo! I like the name! IM INNNN! 

Detective pikachu: On it!

be-boop: Ready for look out!

Space monkey: I love you guys :)

AN: Im lowkey sorry i ended this chaotic mess with angst,,,, but like fr i love it i love angst,, i hate reading it but love writing it

[cheshiresense]

An AU of Cest La Vie in which Harry is more like Hadrian and strike utter terror into anyone who messes with Orion?

Lmao I feel like we’re leaving Hadrian to hang in his own world T_T But okay, what if Orion grew up with a Harry who was more like Hadrian, yes?

Edit: OMFG THIS GOT LONG I HAVE ZERO SELF-CONTROL IN THIS UNIVERSE AND I FEEL LIKE THERE MIGHT BE SPOILERS.

1. The first time Harry remembers meeting Orion is when he’s four and his parents tell him that his Uncle Siri and Uncle Remy have a son now, his age, and they hope Harry will get along with him. Harry doesn’t really have any friends - he’s met Fred and George and Ron and Neville a few times at the park, but never long enough to play for more than an hour or two. Their parents say it’s not safe to spend too much time outside of their houses at the moment for some reason, but Uncle Siri and Uncle Remy���s house might as well be a second home to Harry, so Harry hopes he’ll be able to make Actual Friends with their new son. So they go, and Harry’s first impression of Orion is black hair and blue eyes and a pale face attached to a boy half-hiding behind Uncle Remy’s leg. Harry’s not sure why but the boy is obviously the one he’s supposed to meet, so he stumbles forward, curious and excited and just a little nervous, and boldly introduces himself. It takes a few moments, but then the other boy mumbles hello and says his name is Orion, and after another few seconds he finally lets go of Uncle Remy’s hand and takes a hesitant step towards Harry instead, so Harry decides they’re off to a great start and promptly drags the boy off to play. Since Orion is new, Harry tells him about all his favourite games, but Orion has to try everything so he’ll know what his favourite games are, and Orion is quiet, not shy like Neville, just quiet, but he also smiles more the longer he plays with Harry, so Harry tries to be patient. By the time dinner swings around, Orion is responding more often, with more than just nods or headshakes, and Mum even has to remind them to eat several times because they’re talking too much. By the time they have to leave, Harry can’t wait to come back.

2. The first time Harry learns Orion is a werewolf is when he’s seven. He sees Orion almost every day now, so it’s that much more obvious when there are a few days every month where he doesn’t, and he’s been complaining about it for years. His parents always tell him that Uncle Sirius and Uncle Remus and Orion are busy (what are they busy with?), they have a family thing (aren’t they their family too?), they’re out of town (where have they gone?), Orion is sick (we should take over some soup!), and so on and so forth. But then he’s seven and sulking at home because this time it’s Uncle Sirius who wants a quiet day in (since when? and can’t Orion just come over to Harry’s instead?), and even Mum and Dad are out doing adult things. Uncle Peter is babysitting though, and Uncle Peter is never around much and always looks a little jumpy but sometimes he tells Harry things about The War, the big dangerous fight that mostly happened before Harry was even born, the one Dad doesn’t like talking about and Mum doesn’t like Harry asking about because he’s too young. Uncle Peter says Harry is mature for his age though, very smart, almost a grownup himself, which is true, so Harry doesn’t rat Uncle Peter out to his mum, who can be really scary, and he doesn’t say anything even when some of the things Uncle Peter tell him maybe-sort-of-kind-of scares him a little. He tells Harry that the bad guy Mum and Dad fought was very evil and commanded whole armies of dark wizards and dangerous monsters, and he killed so many people and hurt so many people, and sometimes people were even forced to hurt and kill other people for him. Today, he’s rambling about werewolf packs and how they were allowed to eat whole villages and steal and bite regular children in exchange for their loyalty, and they were extra dangerous around the full moon each month—- and abruptly, Harry makes the connection. It only takes a calendar and a few more months of observation to confirm his hunch, he even sneaks into Dad’s work files to read about rogue werewolves just to make sure Uncle Peter wasn’t telling tales, and he wasn’t, and then- and then he doesn’t know what to do. He’s had nightmares about werewolves - and vampires, and inferi, and huge spiders the size of buildings that he’s forgotten what Uncle Peter called them - and he can’t help but remember the stories about people being ripped apart and kids never seeing their parents again and turning into monsters themselves. But. But he also knows Orion, knows Uncle Remus too, he’s grown up with them, and they can’t possibly do any of what Uncle Peter says werewolves do. So maybe there are exceptions. Or maybe the bad guy forced the werewolves to eat people. Either way, the monsters in Uncle Peter’s stories can’t be Harry’s best friend, obviously - Orion’s afraid of squirrels for Merlin’s sake, and just last week he spent half an hour throwing up in the toilet because Ron dared him into a marshmallow-eating contest and everyone got grounded. And Uncle Remus wouldn’t hurt a fly, let alone a child. He still gives Harry and Orion piggyback rides even though they’re getting too old for that sort of thing. Scary monsters wouldn’t be like that at all. So Harry makes a decision - he’ll treat Orion like Orion and Uncle Remus like Uncle Remus, and until he meets an actual werewolf monster, he’s going to be brave and he won’t let Uncle Peter’s stories or Dad’s reports scare him.

3. The first time Harry hits someone, he’s ten, and they’re at one of those galas that Mum and Dad reluctantly dress up for. Most of the time, Harry - and Orion - doesn’t have to go, but occasionally, Dad complains about keeping up appearances and Mum frowns and stuffs him into a set of his nice robes. Harry doesn’t mind too much - it’s mostly boring, although he has to remember to smile and say nice things when Ministry people come up to talk to him, which isn’t often. This time, he’s standing with Orion in a corner, each of them sipping at a fizzy drink (they’re only allowed one glass, it’s not alcoholic but it’s very sugary). Then this stuck-up pureblood boy struts over with a smirk and says to Orion without so much as a hello, “I’m surprised they let dirty mutts through the door, Black. Did you have to sit up and beg?”

Harry doesn’t even know what happens until it’s happened. He was told about werewolves a year after he first figured it out. He pretended to be surprised, but he also hugged Orion and Uncle Remus and made sure they knew that he knew they weren’t monsters.

He’s never come across anyone who thought otherwise. Even Uncle Peter - the few times he’s slunk in to join them for dinner - doesn’t treat Orion or Uncle Remus any differently than he does the rest of the family.

So Harry reacts before he even makes the decision to do it. One second he’s staring at Orion’s hunched shoulders and the open scared hurt on his face, and then the pureblood boy is on the ground crying from a broken nose, and a moment later, all the adults are descending on them and shouting.

Hours later, Harry is back home and grounded until next month, but Orion also tackled him with a hug as soon as they flooed through, and he’s allowed to stay and eat ice-cream with Harry, so Harry figures he’s not in too much trouble. Mum scolds him for using physical violence, and Uncle Remus explains in resigned tones that some people are just like that and Harry shouldn’t let it bother him, but Uncle Sirius winks at him from behind everyone’s backs, eyes glittering with something as hot and fierce as the feeling in Harry’s own chest when that boy had insulted Orion, and Dad pulls him aside later and tells him to be more subtle. After all, Marauders don’t get caught.

4. The first time someone at Hogwarts takes a shot at Orion for being a werewolf, Harry’s already had enough, he is ready to throw down. It’s just a third-year, so he spends a month reading up and practicing the few simple spells he’d need, and then he turns a patch of ground into a sinkhole, lures the third-year outside, and leaves him there overnight. Hagrid only finds him in the morning, and the cold and bug bites he gets leaves him stuck in the Hospital Wing for a week. Orion gives him sideways looks for even longer, but some of the tension in his shoulders that’s been there since Dumbledore made the announcement slides away, and the next time someone insults him, his chin doesn’t dip in shame, and he doesn’t give his bully anything more than a cool look of disinterest before turning on his heel and following Harry to their next class. Of course, they still prank the daylights out of the bully by the end of the week.

5. It takes four years of hard work before people learn - never insult Orion Black when word of it can and will get back to Harry Potter. Especially since Harry and Orion’s circle of friends start getting bigger after they enter Hogwarts, with allies in every House, and even the thickest, most bigoted students know better than to turn what feels like half the school against them. So, at least for the rest of their school tenure, being a werewolf doesn’t mean much anymore. New students find out, and they learn the facts or they’re warned against speaking unwisely. At the end of the day, Orion is just another student, albeit probably the most protected in Hogwarts, and Harry makes damn sure every single person knows it.

[embcrry]

ok thisss took wayyy longer than i’d expected . like it’s fucking midnight ? like guys im such a mess omfg . anywaysss * tana mongeau vc “ welcome to my trash bin daught or welcome back to my trash bin daughter ... what ? was ? that ? idfk . if you wanna plot with my overly tired ass give this post a like and i’ll love you down i promise !! also i apologize for how long this intro is going to be in advance !

new york’s very own  𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐄 " 𝐄𝐌𝐌𝐀 " 𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐘 was spotted on broadway street in 𝘓𝘖𝘜𝘉𝘖𝘜𝘛𝘐𝘕 𝘌𝘓𝘖𝘐𝘚𝘌 𝘉𝘖𝘖𝘛𝘚  . your resemblance to barbara palvin is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐃  birthday bash . while living in nyc , you’ve been labeled as being guarded , but also dependable  . i guess being a 𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 explains that . 3 things that would paint a better picture of you would be  𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘶𝘱, 𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘫𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘰𝘶���𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘸𝘰𝘯 + 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘶𝘱 𝘢𝘸𝘬𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘴𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘴𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘴  .  &  ( female & she/her  )  +  ( faith , 21 , she/her , est . )

𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃 𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

FULL NAME : emilie sierra berry . NICKNAME : emma , em , emma bear ( by her little sister ) . BIRTH DATE : march 1st , 1998 . AGE : 22 . GENDER : female ( cis ) . PRONOUNS : she + her . ORIENTATION :  pansexual ( attractions are equal ) , panromantic ( leans more toward women ) . BIRTH PLACE : brisbane , australia ( see home here ) . the family still owns this house but don’t use it much . HOMETOWN : new york city ( upper west side ) , new york ( see home here ) . her dad + little sister still live here today . CURRENT LOCATION : new york city ( upper east side ) , new york ( see home here ) . moved in one year ago after break up . EDUCATION LEVEL : highschool diploma .   OCCUPATION : olympic swimmer ( emulated after katie ledecky ) , socialite , escort ( no one knows ) . NET WORTH : 32million ( every year up until she’s twenty five she receives a percentage of her trust fund ) . FAMILY NET WORTH : 3.1billion ( father ) , 4.8billion ( mother + step - father ) . PARENTS : adrian berry ( father , 51 , hedge fund manager ) , natasha laffont ( mother , 48 , former super model + philanthropist ) , thomas laffont ( step - father , 50 ,  businessman + art collector ) . SIBLINGS : tatiana berry ( sister , 10 , student + ballet dancer ) , bradley laffont ( step-brother , 24 , new york rangers player ) . PETS : jagger ( ragdoll cat , picture ) , maggie ( pomeranian - husky , picture ) . NATIONALITY : australian - american . ETHNICITY : hungarian . CLOTHING STYLE : expensive yet casual ; alot of black , hoodies , leather is a staple , high end sneakers , boots , colorful suits . JEWELRY : gold ; dangly earring , cartier bracelet , tiffany rings , barbell nipple piercings. DIET : pescitarian , no dairy ( lactose intolerant ) . WORK OUT HABITS : six times a week ( mostly boxing + swimming  ) . PERSONALITY : guarded ; there is nothing emma hates more than talking about her feelings or letting anyone know who she’s feeling , she has trouble trusting people for good reason ( the girls trust issues have trust issues yall ) + dependable ; if you need anything in the world go to emma she will move mountains to get shit down for you , she’s very punctual , and super disciplined probably due to being an olympian + goofy ; she doesn’t take much too seriously tbh , ( similar to joey + phoebe from friends ) she can be a bit of a space cadet and that always ends in her making everyone laugh + stubborn ; one thing is for sure about emma she’s extremely hard headed , loves getting her way , and is incredibly unforgiving . 

𝐁𝐈𝐎𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐏𝐇𝐘 ( in bullets )

her parents met during college , where they both attended princeton university . natasha , her mom , was in the middle of her modeling career completely blowing up while adrian was already setting the foundation of his investment company . they had a whirlwind romance and were married just a year after adrian graduated from princeton . both coming from old money , emma’s grandparents on both sides are extremely meticulous about the image of their family + so the same mentality was instilled in adrian + natasha .

 emma spent the first nine years of her life in brisbane , australia . her parents had moved out to australia just a couple years before she was born for the sake of making her father’s company an international success . 

with her parents always off doing something , emma was raised by her nanny + butler . when she was six she expressed her desire to get into swimming after watching michael phelps in the 2004 summer olympics . she was in absolute awe by him + wanted to be just like him . so the next day her nanny spoke to her parents and later that day she was enrolled into a local swimming program .

when she was nine her parents broke the news to her that they were moving to new york . at first she wasn’t all too mad about the move , she didn’t have many friends in school , wasn’t a big fan of her teachers , and knew the one thing she loved she could still do in new york . her outlook on the move changed when she found out that her nanny + butler would not be making the move across the equator with them though . how dare her parents steal the only people who’d ever taken care of her away from her ? she thought . she threw an absolute fit in protest ; completely wrecking the home + locking herself away in the bathroom in her room for nearly 20 hours before her nanny talked her into coming out . 

once in new york , emma was miserable . she had tantrums everyday and even stopped swimming for a few months . what inevitably pulled her out of her funk was a trip disneyland paris + her mom bringing her out to buy a whole new wardrobe . yall ever heard of a spoiled brat ?

once she was open to the idea of new york she kind of fell in love with the city , to be honest . she grew close to her new nanny + butler , of course and fell in love with her new swimming coach .

when she was fourteen her parents got a divorce and just six months later her mom was married to a billionaire living in connecticut with a son just two years older than emma . anyone with a brain could put together that her mom had been cheating on her dad , that was except for her dad who’d fallen into denial that his ex - wife would come back . 

[ trigger warning : alcoholism , child abuse , violence ] after months of listening to her father , emma broke , the two got in a huge screaming match about how her mom wasn’t coming back saying things like “this is so pathetic, stop graveling over a women who doesn’t want you” + “she doesn’t want you” + “just move on, she’s never coming back, she’s fucking an art collector in connecticut”. mind you she’s fourteen talking to her dad like this , yikes . he started spiraling after that , drinking heavily , doing coke more than just at events , and when emma copped an attitude he’d hit her . it started with just a rough slap , pushing her into the pool or down the stairs , and then it turned into punching her . it got so bad her coach started noticing during swim practices and inevitably threatened her dad , either he let her move in with him or he’d call the police . so , not wanting a tarnished reputation , her dad sent her off to live with her swim coach .

[ trigger warning : grooming ] life with her swim coach was cool , she got to swim alot more plus he was extremely high profile due to sending swimmers to the olympics as well acting in a few movies so she got to go to alot of events with him all across the world . she enjoyed her time with him more than she’d enjoyed the entirety of her life and then he got her to the 2012 olympics in london + her trust and appreciation for him sky rocketed . in her eyes no one int he world could or did love her more .

coming back from the olympics , her had fully sobered up and was ready to bring emma back home .  her and her coach weren’t completely gun ho for the move but she inevitably moved back home with her father .

[ trigger warning : statutory rape ] just a month after being back home , her coach started being a little too touchy with her . she felt uncomfortable by his advances but figured her was only taking care of her . then he kissed her and she was pretty creeped out so she asked what he was doing , basically the creep told her he was just missing her alot because she wasn’t living with him and reminded her about how he was really the only person who cared about her . she accepted what he said and soon after they started sleeping together regularly . he didn’t even have to tell her not to tell anyone , she innately knew if she ever told anyone he wouldn’t be her coach anymore and emma just wasn’t willing to lose the best coach she’d ever had . this continued for a little over a year until she went to the doctors and her mom went with her , her mom stayed in the room because the check up wasn’t all that invasive + then when her doctor asked her if she was sexually active her mom answered no but emma , not wanting to lie , stayed silent . she inevitably confessed at the appointment that she was sexually active . her mom freaked out and wanted to know who but of course emma didn’t spill that . she inevitably lied and said some guy she went to school with . within a week her mom found out she lied and refused to let emma go anywhere until she confessed who she was sleeping with . knowing her mom wouldn’t let up she told her it was her coach + that it wasn’t a big deal . but emma knew it was . her mom gave her coach an ultimatum he either quit coaching for good or she’d turn him in . she he quit and emma never heard from him again . 

she stopped talking to her more directly after that + stopped going back to connecticut for the weekends like she had been since her parents divorce . she was now sixteen without a swimming coach + completely mad at the world .  she’d had a rough few years , to say the least . she turned to partying , HEAVY , to cope with it all . she slept with anyone who so much as gave her a second look she didn’t care if they were older than her , had a girlfriend / boyfriend , if you were into her you could have her . it took her almost five months before she committed to a swim coach + they really whipped her back into shape . no more partying , emma went from school to practice and then home . it was awfully boring for the new party girl but she had one of the best coaches in the world + they promised to stop coaching her had she not listened to their every word . the only thing she cared more about then letting loose was going to another olympics . 

she attended a private school in manhattan where she completely smashed each and everyone of the school, districts , and state records in swimming . she was never big into her academics but she upheld a b average for the sake of being able to stay on the schools swimming team . if she received anything less than a b she would guilt her dad into giving her school a donation so they’d give her the grade she felt she deserved . 

she graduated from highschool in 2016 and although she was accepted into multiple schools across the nation , with athletic full ride offers from each school  , but she inevitably declined each school because she did want to spend another second behind a desk . knowing her dad would never approve of her not going to college , with his ivy league education ass , she lied to him and said she was attending nyu . 

she went to the 2016 olympics in rio and completely dominated ( 4 gold medals , 1 silver + breaking five world/olympic/american records in the meets ) . 

just months in 2017 her dad started to pick up on her lie about attending college . telling her she needed to enroll immediately or he’d cut her off . calling his bluff she didn’t enroll . she quickly learned that he wasn’t bluffing when he completely cut her off , telling her she had a month to find a place to live and move out .  

thanks to her olympics money + her endorsements with tyr sports + adidas she had enough money to get an apartment but her saving would deplete quick so she knew she needed to do something to make alot of money + quick .

desperate and running out of time emma joined seeking arrangements under an alias as sierra meyers . there were a few success and plenty of total blunders on the site but she got lucky with the first women she met with who offered to get her into escorting . emma didn’t even give it a second thought before she said yes , the only thing she asked is that the clientele not want her to attend highly publicized events with her as she's quickly get caught due to her socialite status   . 

within a year she’d made half of what her entire lifes work had made her , she grew obsessed with escorting and what made it crazy was there were people who would pay her half a million just to have dinner and talk with her . of course , those were the unicorns though because most wanted to sleep with her at the end of the night . 

when she turned twenty one her dad gave in and gave her back her blackcard + even offered to move her back into the house , she took the credit card but decided to continue living outside of his walls . 

she could’ve quit escorting right then and there , but she’d grown an addiction if you will to her work . there was something about the secrecy of it + her ability to make millions so easily that kept her going .

𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

former roommate ; these two moved in together after her dad kicked her out + even though she moved in with someone else months after they signed the lease she payed them for her half of the rent for the rest of the lease , ex ; they dated when she was cut off by her dad + they inevitably moved into together they could of had a rocky or really good relationship by broke up around this time last year , the guy she “ lost “ her virginity to ; he didn’t actually take her virginity , in truth these two could very well have never even slept together but he’s the guy she lied to her about sleeping with to cover up sleeping with her coach he found out about her lie when emma’s mom asked his parents if he was sleeping with emma we can decide where things went from there between these two , suspicious friend ; they’re starting to pick up on her random disappearing + secrecy , maybe they start following her at some point and inevitably confront her about escorting or maybe they think she’s doing something else and accuse her of that ? , first girlfriend , more exes , people she’s slept with , someone who she slept with + they had a significant other , fellow olympians , travel buddy , podcast co-host ; these two came up with an idea recently to start a podcast , they haven't released it just yet but it’d be similar to call her daddy / impulsive !

[rumrumaway]

OMFG YOU HAVE BLESSED MY DAY I LOVE YOU SOO MUCH! Skskskdkdmc ( * whispers * can there be a part 3? Pretty please)

YES, THERE CAN - AND HERE IT IS MY LOVELY BABES-BLESS~

PAIRING: Flesh/Miami RATING: Mature (no NSFW)Part One | Part Two | [HERE] 

Since last night, Miami had taken a quick liking to Flesh–finding the man oddly… intriguing for a Rick. Flesh was a fairly stand-up guy, who was ready to live his life with the two most important things at his side: his wife and his daughter. Though he had a knack for science, he wasn’t as indulged in it as other Ricks were, and probably wouldn’t find it until much later in life, or so Miami assumed.

Yet, even if Miami knew better than other Ricks, he couldn’t help but admire the passion Flesh had. 

Though, all Ricks had that sort of fire early in life. 

Things were new, Ricks were young. Up until this point, teleportation was their million-dollar idea, but now here they were hoarding away the only secret to becoming the most powerful man in the universe. Flesh was no different. 

His desire to keep his life together was palpable, though. Miami could stand behind that, knowing it was sweet to relish in the feeling of love. It was that chemically ignited high that tied down every Rick at least once–even if it didn’t last long.

Smoke billowed up towards the ceiling as Miami watched Flesh from across the room. He let out some smoke, taking the time to admire the sun rise before his attention was drawn to the rousing body on the couch. He peeked over the back, finding Flesh sitting up slowly–head heavy and hanging low from his assumed-hangover. Flesh was shirtless, body scarred in various places across his back and around his shoulders–some scars looked old, some looked new. His hair was a mess, quickly smoothed out by his fingers, and voice low and gravelly in a tone of waking.

As he woke, Miami slipped off the edge of his own desk and wandered towards the other. Sitting down with a glass of whiskey, he slapped the other on the shoulder and sighed, “it’s about time, Rockstar.”He sat down next to Flesh, who eyed the glass a bit sickly before looking away. Apparently, he was not in a hardy-drinking mood anymore. “So,” Miami lulled his head back and rested his arms on either side of the couch, “”what’s the plan, Rolling Stones?”

“What?”

“Are you thinking about going home?”

“Home?” the question lingered on his mind before he shook his head and rubbed at his eyes. “Y-Yeah,” he groaned, “of course I am–why wouldn’t I?”

“Well,” Miami hummed, “sometimes Ricks just, don’t. They don’t see a reason in it, and stay here.” The statement fell appallingly on Flesh’s ears, who looked to him with a contorted face of confusion and disgust. 

“Why?”

“Why else?” he shrugged, “it shouldn’t be a surprise, R&R, you are a Rick after all.” 

“What does that mean exactly?” Miami rose a corner of his brow at Flesh, catching the whole of the man’s quick irritation towards him. What was Flesh so upset about?

“Don’t snap at me, bro, it’s your decision. I’m just laying it out there–you shouldn’t be surprised that some versions of you have left. You’re not the first Rick to wander into my club after a night like that.”Flesh merely watched the other in question, glaring at the other for even suggesting he was like other Ricks. Miami sighed softly, and propped a foot up on the coffee table, crossing the other as he lounged. He said, “almost every Rick had a Diane - or Dante or whatever - and almost every one of them come here day in and day out after some argument or another. Some Ricks just realize that they’re better off without them and stay here.”

“What,” Flesh accused, “so you think I’m like the rest of those half-brained assholes?”

“That’s really no way to talk about yourself, Nirvana,” Miami snapped back. “You realize how many Ricks come here and drink themselves in a spirograph, wracking their brains over whether they should stay or go?! Your problems aren’t unique to the rest of the other yous out there. Dianes realize Ricks are too toxic for their daughters, and Ricks realize they’re too damn smart for the rest of the world. The only other person that clearly understands them is themselves–why the fuck else do you think this place exists?”Flesh finally fell silent, having stood up in the process of Miami’s rant. Miami watched him, glaring back at his mirrored-self, who was hastily grabbing his clothes and throwing them back on quickly. “My point is, Flesh, you came here - just like any other Rick would - and drank yourself in circles trying to figure out if it’s really worth it. You don’t want to face the reality that love is just a chemical reaction that got you to breed–and now you have a daughter that even Diane doesn’t want you to influence. Like every Rick around here, their daughters may be important to them now, but they won’t be by the time they realize it pays to be a selfish-bastard.”

Flesh stopped momentarily, eyes wide and angry at the other Rick. How could he say something so disgusting about his daughter? Beth was just a child; maybe she was someone who deserved a better life than what he could offer–but he would damn sure try to give her at least that. Yet, Miami stared at him disinterestedly. He knew Flesh would leave, try to prove him wrong - anything to make a point - but he would be right back here by next week. Flesh and Diane would continue to argue, and become more aggressive before Flesh would make his decision to leave. Perhaps at one point it was a difficult pill to swallow, knowing certain lives would be better off without you, but it was what Ricks could do if they really cared. 

Flesh would have to figure that out soon.

“Maybe for you,” Flesh spit as he pulled his vest around his shoulders. Miami watched him snag out his portal gun, and open a new doorway back home. “But I’m a different kind of Rick.”

“Sure,” Miami sighed softly as Flesh walked towards the green swirling mass. “Lemme know how that goes for ya’,” the words were laced with some venom, obviously bothered by the way Flesh reproached him. Soon, the man disappeared in the swirl of viscous slime, and Miami sipped from his glass of amber booze, “I’ll be here, waiting.”

A/N: WOW, WHAT A  S O U R  ENDING.

Honestly, I’m really glad with how this one turned out. It might be off character for Rick, but these are young versions of the man. 

Nonetheless, I hope you guys enjoyed ( /; w ;)/ I’m still planning on releasing Part 2 for Doofus Verse Diane/Rick | Reader/Rick | Jerry/Rick (College!AU). 

I did write NSFW Flesh/Zero! Check that out too! c: 

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

A Definitely Incomplete List Of My Favorite Moments From The Lightning Thief (book), because I'm having Feelings

Percy very causally mentioning times he accidentally hit a school bus with a canon or dropped fifth graders into shark-infested water

Grover Underwood

Just everything he’s ever done

Percy running an illegal candy ring out of his dorm room 

“I was worried they found out I got my essay on Tom Sawyer from the internet and were going to take away my grade. Or worse, they were going to make me read the book.”

When Percy thought Grover was going to give him some deep, meaningful commentary on life to make him feel better but Grover just wanted Percy’s lunch

Percy tried so hard to do well on his Latin final and Chiron somehow thinks it’s a good idea to tell him he’s ‘not normal’ in front of the class my poor boy

That one part where Percy essentially went “Oh hey mom’s home!!! Better reschedule this panic attack I was having!!” 

When Percy did that weird hand sign (that was never explained) and the door slammed on Gabe so hard he flew up the steps

The fact that when Grover finally tracked Percy down he wasn’t wearing any pants. Like, there was literally no reason for him to not have the fake feet and the jeans on. No actual reason for him to be free balling it. Percy just needed a shock apparently. Showing up in the middle of a hurricane with no pants, dramatic ass satyr I love him. 

The SATISFYING DEATH of Gabe’s Camaro + Sally apparently learned bullfighting just in case because she truly is the best mom

Percy killing the minotaur with its own horn

Percy dragging Grover over the camp line while crying for his mom literally end me

“You drool when you sleep.” could we get more iconic here

Percy teasing Annabeth about her crush on Luke

When Luke stole some toiletries for Percy and he got a little choked up because it was apparently the nicest thing anyone had ever done for him

The fact that Chiron basically told Annabeth that Percy was her destiny

The fact that a recovering alcoholic god of wine who hates children was deemed fit to run a camp for children

Not so fun: Percy, upon meeting Mr. D, immediately recognizing the signs of an alcoholic and going out of his way to sit far away from him ‘just in case’

The fact that everyone just expected him to hear ‘the greek gods are real’ and move on?? why would no one let this boy be in shock omg

Zeus apparently had a thing for the fluffy 80′s hairstyles

“the real world is where the monsters are” 

The fact that Poseidon could have claimed Percy at literally any moment but he apparently decided he really needed that dramatic reveal during capture the flag.

When Zeus was feeling Extra Dramatic(tm) after Percy’s claiming so he started making it rain inside the camp boarders and everyone was lowkey freaking out

When Annabeth pulls off her invisible cap and declares she’s going on the quest with him and Percy was like, beyond unsurprised that she was there and didn’t even attempt to fight her 

Chiron forgot to give Percy a sword from his father for like, an entire month. 

Grover with those freaking flying shoes oh my God

Annabeth blushing literally any time Luke talks to her 

IN THIS HOUSE WE LOVE AND RESPECT ARGUS, HEAD OF CAMP SECURITY

lmao when Percy and Annabeth start bickering about something and Argus just winks at Percy because he knows

When they were playing hackey sack with an apple but it got too close to Grover’s mouth and he just ate the whole thing

The entire bus scene oh my God

“I was about to become the ADHD Poster Child of the Year” as he’s CRASHING A BUS

Annabeth on a fury’s back 

the explosion. just. all gr8. 

When Grover tries to play a path finder song and Percy just immediately slams into a tree. Also the fact that the path finder song was actually just a Hillary Duff number. 

“You two are giving me a migraine, and satyr's don’t even get migraines!” 

Percy actually, truly trying to sell the story that the three of them are circus orphans who got separated from their ringleader 

Grover: hey guys this place is REALLY SHADY and we need to leave

Annabeth and Percy: but f o o d

Can you imagine walking into a store and finding your dead uncle’s body on display? Like????

When Medusa revealed herself and Annabeth’s running around invisible, Percy’s swinging a sword blindly and Grover’s flying around screaming and trying to whack her with a stick: everyone here is a MESS

When Annabeth was overly annoyed with Percy after that ordeal??? Sweetheart you fell for the trick too

Name something more iconic than 12 year old Percy Jackson mailing the decapitated head of Medusa to the gods on Mt. Olympus in an act of sheer pettiness. I dare you. 

When Percy was insisting on taking first watch while the others slept and Grover was basically like “hey kiddo listen to this” and played a song that immediately knocked him out so he could sleep all night 

“Percy. Say hello to the poodle.”

Percy seeing all the Greek creatures from the train window 

When Annabeth was dragging the boys to the St. Louis Arch and Percy’s claustrophobic ass Did Not Want To Get In That Tiny Elevator but he went anyway because he wanted Annabeth to be happy. That boy has had it bad since the start. 

“I am Echidna!”

“Isn’t...isn’t that a type of anteater?”

“I HATE AUSTRALIA.” 

How many times has Percy actually been poisoned throughout all the series I literally want a count 

‘Lemme just, uh....jump off the fucking St. Louis Arch and hope I don’t die when I hit the water.’

There is just something very aesthetic about Percy lighting a fire in the bottom of a river 

Percy’s got so much pent-up rage that he’s just immediately ready to wreck Ares upon meeting him omfg

THE THRILL RIDE O’ LOVE

Annabeth getting so worked up and flustered over going down there with Percy because it’s a love ride and Percy’s just like “you literally do not have to make this a Thing” lmao

Annabeth wouldn’t let Percy touch Aphrodite’s scarf because she didn’t want him getting infected by love magic but then...touched it herself lol

The entire sequence with the mechanical spiders and the cameras and the ride itself 

Percy’s plan to get off the ride!!!! He’s so smart okay can people stop calling him stupid!!! 

Grover trying to catch them both in mid-air but they‘re too heavy so the three of them just kind of slowly crash into one of those face-cut-out posters lol

Percy, turning to the camera’s broadcasting this shit on Olympus: “Show’s over! Thank You! Goodnight!” 

THE FUCKING ZOO BUS

Everything about that scene omg. The animals they had to help. Trying to convince Grover of how great he is. The baby percabeth. my h e a r t

“What if it does line up like the Trojan War? Athena versus Poseidon?”

“I don’t know what my mom will do. I just know I’ll be fighting next to you.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re my friend, Seaweed Brain, any more stupid questions?”

Do you hear that sound? That’s me, ages 13-21(+) sobbing uncontrollably oh my God I love them so much

‘let’s just set a fucking lion loose in Las Vegas’ 

“I put a Blessing of the Wild on them, so they’ll safely find food and shelter wherever they go.”

“Why can’t you put on of those on us?”

“It only works on wild animals.”

“So it would only effect Percy...”

“HEY!” 

When they get to the Lotus hotel and Grover starts playing that game where the deer shoot the hunters azxjhnhdjx

Percy physically having to drag his friends out of there once he realized it was the lair of the lotus eaters

When Annabeth gave the taxi driver her lotus credit card and he started calling her “Your Highness” lmao

Every time in this book Percy comes close to uncovering a Dark Truth the people around him are just like “let’s not worry about that :) “ and my polite boy actually shuts up it’s so wild because I would just keep going lol

CRUSTY THE WATER BED SALESMAN 

Listen that entire scene has lowkey always been one of my Favs and I’m not even sure why but Percy chopping his head off was g r e a t

The entrance to the Underworld is DOA Recording Studios and I love it

“We, uh...all drowned in a bathtub.”

Poor Charon just wants his Italian suits he doesn’t need all this bullshit 

Grover almost getting dragged into Tartarus: not good. very bad. bad shit. 

Annabeth getting emotionally attached to Cerberus in the span of 3 minutes: RELATABLE 

‘huh my backpack that I thought I got rid of five days ago is getting weirdly heavy, that’s not suspicious though, right?’ 

When Hades just starts monologue-ing about all the shit he has to put up with

“what kind of awful things do you have to do to get sewn into Hades underwear?” p e r c y

when Percy realizes the Master Bolt is in his backpack and he’s just like. tell me why. why. I’m a good person. what did I DO. 

When Percy has to sacrifice his mom to get Annabeth and Grover out of there I Cri Evey Tiem 

My cute lil’ baby yelling around on a beach to get Ares to show up 

ahdbsjznx when Grover gives Percy a crushed, half eaten tin can for good like and Percy is just like “Grover...I don’t know what to say.” I LOVE HIM

My sweet son kicking the god of war’s ass. bless. blessed on this day. 

The news crews who suddenly started backtracking and writing Percy as a hero 

Percy, choking back tears, giving Gabe’s store’s phone number out on national television and promising everyone free appliances IM STILL CACKLING I LOVE THIS BOY SO MUCH HE’S ICONIC 

Hades actually releasing Sally because he’s Not As Big Of A Dick As He Could Have Been 

Percy: hey I think there’s a really good chance that Kronos was behind this whole mess-

Zeus and Poseidon: XXX KRONOS DO NOT INTERACT XXX

Poseidon rolling his eyes at literally everything Zeus says and does

Poseidon and Percy’s whole talk omg my sweet boy just wants his dad to love him and Poseidon’s trying to figure out how to show affection when he basically signed this kid’s death sentence I’m crying 

A man will never satisfy me as much or in the same way as Sally Jackson murdering Gabe Ugliano did 

Percy was spending months of summer stressing over who the friend that’s supposed to betray him was but like...Sweetie you had exactly three (3) friends and you knew two of them weren’t gonna hurt you

ahbdjsnx when Percy and Luke were having their conversation in the woods and like Luke’s acting shady af the whole time but it’s literally not until he litters that Percy is like “something...is Wrong.” this boy I s2g

Percy getting bit by a scorpion is Not A Favorite Moment but the nymphs helping him out was 

Percy making his Official Decision to go home for the school year only after Annabeth reveals that he actually did talk her into trying again with her family 

I didn’t mean to write out a summary of the whole damn book it’s six am listen I’m just feeling nostalgia for the original series in this chili’s tonight 

whoops

[clown-bait]

29 Neibolt ST (Monster Roommate AU) CH 11

WhoooOOOOooooo’s ready for some domestic monster bullshit?! So I head cannon that Penny is a secret plumbing expert from living in a sewer for centuries. Also finally introducing one of the main antagonists hope you guys like horror comedy because its about to get GOOFY AF. 

CHAPTER11

Party Prep

Pennywise had been insufferable all day. It seems like ever since he finally was able to get a date with Leech the clown was on cloud 9. Normally having him in a good mood would be a positive thing but when its mixed with an ego boost and pride he became a cocky asshole hell bent on showing everyone how fantastic he is. “What’s the matter Freddy? Jealous that I'm the one with a beautiful woman on my arm this time?” he taunted. They were both attempting to figure out the plumbing situation after Tiffany threw the rampage to end all rampages when Penny “forgot” to fix the problem overnight.

“You know I thought having you in a good mood for once would make things better.”

“You’re so jealous.” the clown sneered.

“I don't know why you're so smug, you know you're going to have to tell her you love her eventually now that you're dating and we all know that you cant handle feelings” Chucky said pretending to help so Tiff would get off his back. The girls were out shopping with Drac, leaving the rest of the boys to figure out the plumbing issue.

“I can put it off.”

“PFF famous last words Jingles this is a chick we’re talking about here” said Freddy

“Like you've ever been in this situation.”

“I’m not a commitment type of guy clown”

“Look Pennywise trust me, girls go crazy for that touchy feely stuff. You need to say something sooner or later or she's gonna end up stabbing you in the heart.” the doll said.

“Was that a metaphor or something that actually happened to you?” asked Freddy

“…..both”

————

“Ok what to get a homicidal maniac with the mind of a child.” Leech and the rest of the gang were down town attempting to accomplish the simple task of shopping for someone other than themselves.

The three monsters were struggling, they needed to surprise their enormous roommate with the perfect gift but it was proving difficult to shop for him since Leatherface never spoke. They knew the giant liked sweets and already had plans to bake a bunch of them once the boys figured out the plumbing issue, but they wanted to get him something special that wasn't just another chainsaw.

“Perhaps a pocket watch?”

“Drac sweetie the 1600s ended a long time ago.” Tiffany rolled her eyes

“We could just pool out money and get him an iPad like most parents this day and age”

“We all agreed this is going to be special Leech, you cant half ass it this time.”

The vampires groaned. “Why is this so hard! Lets just get him a giant pumpkin for Halloween or something they had some at the grocery store earlier”

“Ah! I got it a new hat!”

“Between the out dated advice and your half baked ideas it'll be a wonder if we accomplish anything at all….” Tiff sighed

They stood on the sidewalk of the down town shopping area overwhelmed and exhausted with each other.

“Ok, lets just go store to store till we find something. If we fail completely we can just get him a new meat cleaver or something.” The younger vampire said

“An excellent plan! Let us begin in the vintage clothing store yes?”

“Drac, we are here to get a gift not a new blouse.” Tiff said.

“I do not wear blouses”

“You totally do” Leech sneered at him with a mischievous grin. She’d been hanging out with Kruger and the clown too much.

“Do not think your sass can work on me apprentice. Your beloved clown may let you get away with being unlady-like but I will not tolerate such behavior.” The elder vampire warned.

“Ok he’s not my beloved were just dating”

“You lie to your own heart my dear. Open yourself to love!”

“Dracula's romance novel in the works aside, where are you guys with that any way?”

“I mean…. I guess I might love him? I don't even know if he's actually capable of returning my feelings since it took me screaming at him to actually get him to go on a date with me. He did call me his mate though, so progress I guess?” Leech blushed and fidgeted with her wig.

“You must make his heart realize its true feelings! He knows not why it beats for you!” Dracula sang out.

“I bet we can get him to admit it! Come on hun I got an idea! Drac! come’re!” the doll whispered something into his ear.

“YES! this is an excellent plan we shall begin immediately!”

“Aren’t we supposed to be shopping for a gift?”

“Like you said well find something along the way!”

———————-

Tiff pushed Leech into the nearest clothing store Dracula excitedly fowled behind.

“Guys I really don't need new clothes”

“NONSENSE! Your’s are in shambles my dear! Look at them! Your jeans are ripped and that tshirt is drab!” The elder vampire said grabbing garments off the racks.

“Excuse me but I happen to like ripped jeans and t-shirts thank you very much”

“TONIGHT IS NOT ABOUT COMFORT MY DEAR YOU MUST LOOK YOUR BEST TO WIN HIS COLD HART!” Dracula was getting carried away once again.

“Besides the club were going to would never let you in like that you need a wardrobe update…. and maybe some makeup to hide those dark circles.” said Tiffany

“Penny likes my dark circles”

Dracula sighed “We shall make a lady out of you yet my dear!”

————-

“Move Kruger, you're going to do it wrong” Pennywise grabbed Freddy’s face to shove him out of the way

“I worked in a school boiler room for years I know my way around pipes”

“Excuse me, I LIVE in a sewer I think I'm the most qualified here!”

Chucky rolled his eyes so hard he was worried they were going to fall out. The two had been arguing over pipes for a good half hour now. The living doll had been texting Tiffany out of boredom. (this is a rough translation as Chuck and Tiff communicate almost entirely in emojis)

“Babe save me, the clown and Kruger haven't made any progress. :’( “ he typed

“</3 aw poor baby were having a much better time.”

“>:( no fair what trouble are you getting into.”

“giving the baby vampire a make over for her big date tonight xoxo”

“omfg i should do that with the clown maybe it'll shut him up for a bit >:) ”

“YES! we have to get them together be home in a few hours <3”

“see you soon sugar tits <3<3<3”

“gross Chucky”

“ ;)”

Chucky put his phone away in his front overalls pocket to look up at the scene in front of him Freddy was shooting water into Pennywise’s face laughing as the clown roared and hissed at him. Tiffany had the easy job he thought to himself.

—————

“Alright how does it look, I cant see it so you'll have to help me out here”

“PFF you look like my grandma” Tiffany snorted

“Enough with your laughter girl doll, she looks like a true lady!”

“This thing itches and I can barely breathe.” Leech clawed at the fabric.

“BEAUTY IS NOT COMFORTABLE MY DEAR”

“Lets try something else hun. Something more casual and simple, less ballroom”

She grabbed a simple black dress tight at the top and pleated at the bottom a large belt around the waist. “all we need are some boots!”

“Wait Tiff I cant walk in heels!!”

———-

“Ok clown when she arrives at the party you have to offer her your arm and pull out her chair for her” Chucky instructed.

“Why would I do that? Leech is more than capable of doing all that herself I don't need to do that for her.”

“Its the gentlemanly thing to do idiot ”

“ Human customs are so strange.”

“Focus! Do you have anything to give her?”

“No?”

Chucky sighed “ok so human females are obsessed with jewelry give her something shiny and you'll pretty much be in the clear, don't you have like a giant pile of crap in the sewer? grab something out of there.”

“Shiny. Got it.” The clown was barely paying attention.

“Don't forget to tell her about your massive dick!”

“Kruger! You're not helping! Were trying get the clown laid here not punched in the face!!”

“But we've already mated several times?” Pennywise turned confused.

“No, no, no! This time its going to be different, this time you're going to be in love and its gonna be way more intense. Trust me.” the doll said.

“I don't love,,,”

“PFFFT THATS A LOAD OF HORSE SHIT” Freddy laughed loudly.

“Most importantly don't insult her and do everything you can to impress her. Do that dancing thing you do, chicks dig that”

“Look I don't see how this will be any different than the other times we've been together”

“It's a daaattee Jingles! Girls put special meaning on that word. You aren't just hanging out, you’re…. well you know” the doll raised and lowered his plastic eyebrows

“Wait if a date is just a fancy way to begin mating then why am I doing all this? Seems like a waste of time to me” Pennywise complained “I’ll just show up in her room like usual!”

“Clown its because girls fucking like it” the doll groaned giving up on this lost cause.

Suddenly the shower head turned on without warning, water blasting out of it with tremendous force. It turned and sprayed Chucky so hard he fell off the counter while a storm of toothbrushes and tools flew around the room. A screwdriver stabbed Pennywise in the eye causing him to roar in pain. Meanwhile Freddy was being strangled by Tiffany’s hair care appliances frantically trying to cut the chords with his clawed hand. Pipes unexpectedly broke apart and started spraying water everywhere, the cabinets banged open and shut, and the toilet had begun laughing at them. In fact the entire bathroom was laughing at them. The gang yelled and shouted in confusion “WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?” screamed Chucky

“MY FUCKING EYE” Penny howled in rage

“YOUR BATHROOM IS HAUNTED AS SHIT CLOWN” Freddy roared still wrestling with the hair dryer

The toilet laughed and spoke up “MOOOONSTERSSS??? YOU CALL YOURSELVES MONSTERRRRSS? LOOK AT YOU! PATHETIC WEAK SHELLS OF WHAT YOU ONCE WERE HAHAHAHAHA YOU ARE NO MONSTERS! BUT WE’RE HERE NOW, WEVE BEEN SET FREE AND SOON ALL WILL JOOOOIIINN USSSSS.”

“OH SHIT! ITS THESE ASSHOLES!” Freddy yelled

“YOU FUCKING KNOW THEM?” the clown roared trying to get the screwdriver out of his head his current form becoming less and less held together.

“LONG TIME NO SEE FREDDDYYY! YOU STILL OWE US FROM LAST TIMEE WE WERE- WAIT!! SOMEONE IS HERE! SOMEONE IS COMING! WHO CAN IT BEEEE? WHO CAN IT BEEEEEEEE? OOOOHH!! ITS………YOUR LOVEEEERRRSS!!! POOR POOR MONSTERS SOON WE WILL TAKE THEM! WE WILL TAKE THEM FOR HIM AND THEN WE WILL BE FREE TO TAKE ALL”

Everything stopped abruptly as if something was sucked out of the room. Appliances turning back to normal as if nothing ever happened.

“First of all you jackasses, Dracula is my roommate. We have an odd couple thing going ok?”

“Kruger! NOT the time” Chucky shouted.

“…..H eE Lp” Pennywise gurgled out barely maintaining a human voice.

The door opened downstairs.

“Hey boys were home!” Tiffany called up to them.

Leech climbed the stairs and made her way to her room but froze when she heard moans of pain and a large puddle of water coming from the bathroom.

“Jesus guys how'd you fuck up this ba- WHAT THE FUCK”

——————

“Hold still I'm going to pull it out.” Leech gripped the screwdriver in Penny’s head “ok on the count of 3” Pennywise’s good eye flicked up at her.

“One….. two… three! ” the clown gurgled and grabbed her hands and they pulled together. The tool finally dislodging its self from Pennywise's head causing him to howl in pain blood floating up from the wound.

“Shit Pen you ok?” she cradled the side of his face not caring about cutting herself on the razor sharp teeth splitting his cheeks.

“…H u RT” he managed to say starting to put himself back together.

She ran her fingers though his hair and kissed the top of his head. Pennywise winced at first but leaned into her touches shutting his one good eye and purring faintly at her comforting him. As powerful as the eldritch horror was he was a complete baby when it came to pain sometimes.

“We leave you alone for 4 hours and not only do you guys flood the bathroom again, you end up stabbed and strangled in the process. What the fuck happened?”

“It's a Kandarian demon” growled Freddy “someone read from that damn book again”

“How do we get rid of it?” asked Chucky getting up off the floor

“Find out who sent it”

“And just how do you know all this Kruger?” Pennywise asked finally somewhat back to normal minus his eye.

“I owe it money.”

-----------------------------------

YEAH EVIL DEAD MOTHERFUCKERS! So fun fact Evil Dead was the horror series that literally saved my life so it holds a very special place in my heart. And yes Ash is going to show up. Stay tuned for more deadite fuckery, including musicals, mutilation, and insults! Also bringing in a new OC next chapter who I think everyone will like! So get hype friends!

[retroellie]

The Last of Us Headcannons

Summary: Headcannons about TLOU2 characters 

A/N: I’m sorry I haven’t posted in a bit, I’ve ben stressed so I thought I’d write for my comfort characters lmao 

Warnings: Slight NSFW mentions, TLOU2 spoilers 

Word count: 2.4K

Ellie

-This girl is the best girlfriend i swear

-She will always tell you she loves you when she leaves or even if she goes into the other room

-She’s lost a lot of people so she’s always telling you how much she loves you just in case

-Helping her when she has nightmares, especially after joel's death

-”Please don’t leave me.”

-“Ellie, I’m not going anywhere.” 

-She’s definitely a lover of old music

-80s and early 90s was definitely her favorite eras music and movies wise

-Gifting her records you found in abandoned buildings

-She draws you a lot, especially when you aren’t paying attention

-One time she couldn’t sleep so she drew you, she thought you looked peaceful asleep. That drawing is probably her favorite she’s ever done.

-You basically live with her in the garage she lives in

-Winters are always cold in the garage so y’all are basically attached to each other

-You both are cuddled up watching movies with tons of blankets on

-This girl is horny all the time, like if yall are alone she’s on top of you

-Dancing together at the dances

-This girl is so clingy omfg

-Ellie worries about the looks and comment yall get when showing affection in public so she tends to tone down her clinginess

-Joel loves you, point blank period

-When ellie tells you what joel did for her, you didn’t know if you should be happy or sad

-They were gonna take ellie away from you, you probably would've done the same

-”My life would have mattered.”

-”Your life matters to me.”

-You tried to make her feel better about it though, telling her that there would still be bad people and infected in the world

-Neck kisses from the back, my heart is melting holy shit

-She asks maria to put you on routes with her cause mama you are not going without her

-Puns, just puns all the time and you love it

-Definitely calls you babe and baby, you always make fun of her for it but she knows you loves it

-Yall make fun of each other but it’s all in good fun she will never take it too far

Joel

-You’re this mans baby idc

-No one hurts you or they will get tracked down and their knee caps will be gone

-Joel knows full well you can take care of yourself but he just gets so mad

-This man is so soft for you

-He tries to spoil you the best way he can, going out of his way to get you presents from abandon stores

-Teaches you how to play guitar

-He will have you sit in his lap and play the chords

-”Is it sounding better?”

-He just nods and kisses along your back

-He will sing you to sleep if you ask him

-This man has shown you some good ass music, yall sometimes just lay in bed and listen to old records

-He loves the way you look in his shirts, this man melts or bends you over the kitchen table

-He doesn’t cry often but this man is hurt

-The first time you saw him cry was when he broke down to you about ellie and the fireflies and what he did

-It hurt him a lot to admit it but he was so relieved that he could let go and someone be on his side for once

-Tells you all about sarah and how she would like you

-”She would’ve loved you.”

-”Yeah, casue i’m the coolest.”

-”You're a nerd.” He chuckled out

-He would happily tell you about life before the infection, what it was like to not have to look over your shoulder all the time

-He would never tell you about his time in boston

-He didn’t want to scare you, so you never asked but you had a good idea of what happened because of tommy

-Slow dancing in the kitchen while dinner is on the stove

-Forehead kisses in the morning when he has to leave for rounds and your dead to the world

-Calls you Babygirl and princess, IDK HE JUST SEEMS LIKE THE TYPE OKAY

-His voice in the morning>>>>>>

-Will watch you dance from a far while at dances

-Takes you out on little dates, he doesn’t even care about the stares yall (The age gap)

-He is prepared for anything to happen so he loves you like it’s his last day

-Talks about having kids with you but is okay if you don’t want them, i mean he’s not sure if he wants another one but hell, He said he wasn’t going to date anymore but here we are

-If you want kids he doesn't care hold old he is, he will try and try and try to give you a child 

-”Damn it i got my period.” 

-”Well then I reckon we gotta try again, huh baby girl.” He says with a smirk 

-This man has a daddy kink and that’s all i gotta say about that umm anyways

-He is madly in love with you and he shows it, he has lost too many people and he has the mindset of “Good things don’t last forever”

Tommy

-I love this man with all my heart, he’s my baby

-He’s very caring and will hold you anytime you need to be held

-He just wants to help people and make the world a little easier for them so he overworks himself to the max trying to keep everything in jackson in order

-”Tommy, it’s 3 am and you got rounds in the morning. Come to bed.”

-”Yeah i'll be in there in a minute, i just gotta figure out the food supply situation.”

-Having to drag his ass to bed

-He loves cuddling, he loves feeling close to you

- Your the fighter of the relationship, tommy doesn’t like to fight if he doesn’t have too so he lets you deal with the violent stuff

-Although tommy loves his brother, he has a hard time forgiving him for the violence he exposed him too

-He feels very undeserving of you and everything good in his life., you have to constantly reassure him that he is a good person and is doing a great job

-He does have nightmares of being in Boston but you were always there for him, he was so thankful for you.

-He loves your cooking, like it can be the most simple thing ever and he’d be like 

-”This is the best Cereal i have ever had, who taught you to cook like this?”

-He has mommy issues, like his mother wasn’t really around so he has a lot of issues with that ig

-He is the best kisser i said what i said

-He’s very passionate and possessive, it’s cute

-He gives you his jackets all the time, he thinks you look so cute in them

- This man is literally the softest i can’t

-He doesn’t cut his hair just because one time you told him you liked it long

-”Jeez honey, your hair is getting pretty long.”

-”Shoot, do I need to cut it again.”

-”No...I like it long, it flatters your face.”

-”I will literally never touch my hair again ever again now that you said that, Okay”

-You have expanded this mans music taste

-He only ever listened to country cause i mean he’s a simple man but then you came along

-You got him a walkman just so he can listen to the music you recommend him

-He tells ellie all about you and asks her for help because he doesn’t want to mess up anything

-He’s not good in relationships and he believes he’s not a very attractive man so he doesn’t really try but he sees himself marrying you

-Spoiler he asks you to marry him because he can’t see himself without you, he doesn’t want to imagine how the world would be so dark without you in it

-He’s not into cute nicknames so he’ll just call you honey

-After joel's death, he was broken and you didn’t think you can even put him back together, but your willing to try

Dina

-I think you would be dina’s first girlfriend but she would love you with all her heart 

-She kissed you at the dance and everything kinda clicked from there 

-She would sneak over to you house in the middle of the night 

-”Jesus, i could've killed you.”

-”But you didn’t silly, come on i’m cold lemme in.” 

-”You're gonna be the death of me dina.” 

-Your rounds with her were never boring, it was always an adventure with her 

-Making out behind building because she couldn’t wait till yall got home 

-This girl will tease you until your bright read in the face

-She will definitely love kissing you, like she will just randomly kiss you 

-She will try to smash you literally anywhere, when she’s wanting to do the nasty it doesn’t matter where you are she will pull you into a random room or bathroom

-She never bores you in bed too, she’s always up to do new things especially since your her first girlfriend 

-When she found out she was pregnant she wanted to give this child the best life so yall decided to move out into a farmhouse 

- Having a kid didn’t really change how she loves you

-She’s still crazy and wild but now she just has a kid on her hip

-You guys were co parents so you both would hunt and take care of JJ 

-You guys would do almost anything to make that kid laugh even if that was dancing like lunatics for an hour straight 

-You guys almost never get alone time so just laying in bed without the kid felt nice 

-Yall are cottagecore lesbians idc, yall are the best parents and i said what i said 

-From behind hugs and kisses, she will grab your hips and kiss your neck until you have no choice but to rip her clothes off 

-Vintage records and slow dancing with JJ 

-I feel like being in a relationship with dina feels like a vintage song about love 

-There's lots of dancing in this relationship because dina loves dancing 

-She’s always afraid that you will feel left out in the family though since your not JJs real parent but you always tell her you don’t mind and you love JJ just like how Jesse would 

-She finds it so hot when your all protective parent when it comes to JJ, as soon as he falls asleep mama yall wont get any sleep 

-Yall are the best parents, dina will fight anyone who hurts JJ and you make him feel loved 

-When he gets older you guys try to tell him about Jesse without making you seem like the outsider of the family if that makes sense 

-Taking care of the animals and plants as a family and reading books about how to while laying in bed 

-Dina makes the best food and she tries to teach you but it just doesn’t add up to what she does 

-Okay we don’t know much about her sister but by the picture we saw she looks hella cool and i think you would be like best friends with her 

Jesse 

- yall sleep on this man i swear, so this one is to all my jesse stans are there 

-He’s kinky, that’s all 

-He knows he’s hot and he’s super cocky about it 

-He’s not much of a cuddler ngl but he will fall asleep and wake up spooning you 

-Your really close to his mom, like she loves you so much 

-He’s very reckless and your kinda the opposite so you kinda tone him down abit so you think that’s why his mom likes you so much 

-Jesse isn’t much of a dancer and he doesn’t really listen to music but he does like to play video games 

-You always pick him up video games randomly and gets so excited 

-You force him to dance with you at dances and he’s so awkward about it 

-”I hate this.” 

-”Awe you love it.” 

-Always trying to grope you while dancing, like will have his hands on your ass and theres kids behind you like sir stoppp but like keep going 

-”Hey! watch those hands.” 

-”I have no idea what your talking about”

-You and dina are pretty good friends like even after their weird relationship, she’s happy for the both of you 

-Okay so let's pretend jesse didn’t die and he is alive and well 

-When he finds out dina is pregnant he freaks out, he’s still pretty young so he’s terrified he won’t be good enough 

-When the baby comes though he’s so excited, when he’s in the infirmary with dina your happy for him but you can’t help but feel an outsider 

-Dina is so sweet and tries to make you feel better 

-”You're gonna be the coolest step parent ever. I’m glad my son gets such a badass step mom damn.” 

-Dina does move out of jackson still though so yall only get JJ every other week, that was the agreement 

-He cooks in the morning for you and JJ while yall are laying in bed 

-I’m sorry but he’s literally the coolest dad, his entire life changes because of that kid 

-When JJ leaves to go over to his moms house Jesse won’t let you get out of bed, this mf hasn’t got any in a week

-He gets a bunch of cook books so he can better his ability to cook for little JJ 

-You guys decorate JJs room together and it’s the cutest thing ever 

-He takes you to romantic places in the abandon city when yall are on rounds together 

-Jesse has a lot of friends but he would much rather hang out with you 

-Yall call each other stupid and dumb a lot but it’s never used as an insult its just for fun 

-”Damn it, why do i always get the nasty ones.” 

-”Because your stupid, dummy.” 

-”That’s right, i forgot.” 

-Your guys bed is never made, you guys don’t even bother at this point. Like either the kid messes it up or you guys mess it up so what's the point 

-He picks you up when he hugs you, literally pick you up from the waist and lift you up 

!Credits to gif owners!

[kaironlokethor]

Pumpkin Spice Poison

< LAST FIRST NEXT>

Tiefling Rogue PC (Kairon) and his tiefling warlock wife NPC (Mur’deth), Dragonborn Fighter PC (Dragon), Changling Druid/warlock PC (Lucious) and his sister/dragons wife a changling fighter NPC (Nox), Lucious’s human wife NPC (Bertha), half-elf rogue/assassin PC (Shadow) and his aarakocra ranger wife NPC (Ali), and Kairon’s childhood friends half-elf rogue NPC (Lokethor) and half-elf/half-orc rogue NPC (Belzathor....yes, named after the guy in Skyrim...the z is silent.....)

We are in the middle of planning a revolution. We have only one more major group to get on our side before we are able to overthrow the king. We had planned to go talk with them this session, but things got kinda derailed. This was a make-up session since our next session would technically fall on Christmas and that’s not a great time for everyone haha. Kairon is just trying to get everyone in the same room at the same time so we can discuss our fucking revolution plan. We go to Lucious’ house. Lucious isn’t there. When Lucious finally comes home, Shadow leaves, so we go trying to look for Shadow

---

So Lucious went to try to talk to the Merchants guild alone and ends up making a terrible deal for minimal support from the merchants guild. It is really a bad deal. Kairon and Dragon were not happy. He made the first bad decision of the session tbh.

---

DM: So, Shadow, what do you want to do in town Kairon OOC: TURN AROUND AND COME BACK HOME Shadow: No no I want to look for that guy you suggested DM: The artificer? sure. Roll -he rolls high investigation- So with minimal asking around, you find the artificer no problem Shadow: Okay, I walk in DM (as the artificer): HELLO! How can I help you? Shadow: I am looking for a...replacement (a few sessions ago he got a contract to kill Lucious and wanted to bring back a finger to prove it’s been done without actually killing him, Lucious was being a little bitch and complaining. Kairon lost patience and just broke Lucious’ finger right off. As payback Lucious cut off Shadow’s finger) DM (as artificer): Ooooh yes oh yes oh yes. You look like you need one! SAY! I have been working on a new model if you want to test it out for me Shadow: For a finger? Yeah! Does it have a hidden blade? DM (as artificer): Oooooh no oh no oh no, it isn’t a finger, it’s a whole arm Shadow: Arm? It can go over my arm? DM (as artificer): OOooh no oh no oh no you will need to cut it off Kairon OOC: NO! DM (as artificer): It has a grappling hook! Shadow: Eh, sure! Cut it off! Kairon OOC: YOU ARE GOING TO CUT OFF A HEALTHY ARM FOR NOTHING? Shadow: Does the arm have a hidden blade? DM (as artificer): It can have up to 3 attachments!I can do a hidden blade Shadow: Yeah! Where do i sign up! -The artificer gives Shadow a 50% discount since it is an experimental model, takes him out back, and fucking lobs off his arm and attaches a new one-

---

-Kairon eventually finds Shadow and gets really upset, so he leaves and starts doing graffiti on posters of the king- DM: A guard notices you “Hey! What are you doing? Wait-- I know that Dragonborn! You’re a wanted criminal!” Kairon: Oh shit DM: The guard takes out his manacles Kairon: WAIT BEFORE THAT I WANT TO ROLL INTIMIDATION AND THAUMATURGY AND Dragon: How about a duel? Kairon: A what? No! Let me intimidate him! DM: The guard looks at you “Of course, a duel.” Dragon: If I win, you forget you ever saw me, if you win, I will grovel in front of the king, beg his forgiveness and go to jail Kairon: What the fuck are you doing??? Dragon: I got this, I got this. I am stronger than him! DM (as the guard): Oh, I’m not fighting, I’ll be using my double! Kairon: Double? DM (as guard): Ah, yes, members in a duel are allowed a double to fight in their place. I better go get him ready. We shall duel at noon with an official present  -The double ends up being a super ogre. it is a CLOSE fight and Dragon just barely pulls through.-

---

-So, when shit heats up Dragon always says “I’ll grip my sword with two hands and...” since it’s a versitile weapon, one handed and two handed. It does extra damage two handed- DM: Dragon, your turn Dragon: I grip my hand with two swords and-- Kairon OOC: Ouch Lucious OOC: I can just imagine two swords coming out of thin air and just wrapping around his hands Dragon: What? What did I say? Kairon: You said you’ll grip your hand with two swords omfg Dragon: Oh. No. I’ll grip my SWORD with both HANDS

---

-The fight was starting to sway in the ogre’s favour- Kairon: Ah, fuck, I am going to cast Bane on the giant to give him disadvantage DM: You know if you get caught you will be persecuted and killed Kairon: I’ll roll stealth -I end up getting the spell off without being caught DM: What’s the DC? Kairon: 14 charisma saving DM: Yeah, he got 16. You’re lucky he’s too stupid to realize someone put a SPELL ON HIM. He would squish you! Dragon is a big tough Dragonborn, you’re just a squishy tiefling child! Kairon OOC: Did you just call me a “Squishy Tiefling Child?” DM: Oh come on you basically are!

---

Kairon: Wow. I think this is the first session Kairon DIDN’T fuck up...but everyone else did... Dragon: Yeah, I’ll own up to that. It was a bad decision Shadow: HEY! My new arm is useful! Lucious: Yeah, and I kinda did get us some support from the guild Kairon: YOU cut off a perfectly healthy arm for no reason and YOU almost got us caught! wtf?!

---

Kairon: So, we need to get the support of the Dwarves in that one city that guy told us about...we should bring them something they like  Lucious: Well, dwarves are pretty greedy.... Kairon: We could pay them...would that work? DM: You would know, dwarves like only 3 things: Money, Power, and Women Kairon: Well, that’s basically the sugar and spice and everything nice of Dragon to be honest

---

-We plan on pretending to be guards and going around claiming the King raised the taxes again and we were there to collect it. The two changlings and Dragon, who has a mask that can allow him to change how he looks, are going to do it- Dragon: Okay, who is going to NOT LUCIOUS do the talking? Lucious: Wh?? Why?? Kairon: Ha, you bitches don’t have my charisma to help you this time. Do not let Lucious talk Dragon: I think Lucious has talked enough Lucious: Well out me, you and Nox, my charisma stat is the highest Dragon: Can’t Nox talk? DM: It would be the smartest to let Lucious do the talking......

---

-While all this is going on, Kairon is selling junk and garbage as “Magical” items, and Shadow goes back to the artificer- DM (as artificer): WELL HELLOOOO! What can I help you with now? Shadow: I’m looking for some poison. What you got for poison? DM (as artificer): Well, you know, some basic poisons Shadow: Anything...more? DM (as artificer): Sadly, no, Just basic Kairon OOC: Basic, you know, uggs, Pumpkin spice poison DM: Why do you always do this? Shadow: Is it actually pumpkin spice poison????? DM: -long heavy sigh- yes. It is pumpkin spice poison Shadow: I’ll take 10 platinum worth! Dragon OOC: Hey! Mix that with the Happy Tea and you really got something there Kairon OOC: Like a pumpkin spice poison latte

---

-So Kairon thought he was orphaned as a kid. When he was a baby he was found under a bush by a band of traveling Half-Elf bandits. He thought his parents were dead but didn’t really care cause his new family. ANYWAY, I gave DM full creative rein over who Kairon’s parents were. Turns out it’s a high elf from the Capitol, where we are. And she just so happen to tell Kairon. Kairon wasn’t happy about it AT ALL- Kairon: So, you’re telling me you just, rolled me under a bush huh? A high elf noble woman like yourself had a bastard demon child and just rolls it under a bush? DM (as high elf): It wasn’t my best moment... Kairon: Whatever. Fuck you. -I turn to her son- You must have a hefty inheritance, huh? Being a noble and a business owner? DM (as her son): Uh, yes, sir. I mean, I would make sure you got your rightful inheritance, of course... Kairon: -I am going to rip the cash register off the counter with a......nat 20 strength roll- DM: Yeah, you get it up somehow The woman looks at you with a ‘wtf’ expression Kairon: Just taking my inheritance! Looks like you’re paying for our motherfucking revolution DM (as the woman): Revo...what? You’re....Uhh.... Kairon: ANYWAY! Gotta go get back to my real family now. You know, the ones who DIDN’T roll me under a bush Shadow OOC: Well, we probably still could roll him under a bush Luscious OOC: His horns might get caught, though Dragon OOC: I bet Dragon could do it. One good hefty roll Kairon OOC: Wow. Thanks guys DM: So...you leave? Kairon: With the cash register, yeah. I am just going to storm back to Lucious’ house

[skyquack-blog]

I am in such a bad mood you guy's A survivor story WiLL FolloW Legit this is a story of triumph and survival... Please read this. If i ever post anything important THIS is it so please for me read this!! This is my story and its pretty amazing. :'( Here i want all ya'll judging me right now to read this and think about it for a moment okay... This is what i wish would happen to you ass holes who cant keep you fucking opnions and scruteny to yourself... Okay!! Go back in time and be essentially a "shut in" with no actual friends to hang out with or talk to mostly because your suffering from certin aspects of schizophrenia that you as well as your family arent aware of... so here we are living under a rock way more quiet than the average human being dealing with weird ass issues like hearing voices and feeling like people can hear your thoughts and feel your emptional states so as a result you shut up and keep to yourself all the time... Then for the first time ever since ever you move to town and get yourself a friend who is mind you border line psychotic but she likes you and shes fun... now 6 months of this and suddenly BOOM your pregnant at 17... your baby daddy dont wanna hang around dont seem to give a fuck bout you even tho he does ect... Spend the next 2 years of your life fighting hard core yelling matches breaking things in a desperate ploy to get your baby daddy to fucking come home... Fight like this hard every day damn near for 2 fucking years b4 you finally give up... Then at 20 i want you to be the single mom of 2 children work every day pay all your own bills take care of and try to raise 2 kids all the while looking back on your bad relationship trying to find a new better more loving and equal partner ship (as a parent so young mind you your only 20)... and now here is for the fun part... Your 22 years old now and you found your self a psychopath... yup full on crazy ass mother fucking manipulative beyond your wildest understanding of manipulation im talking weird mk ultra shit going on and you fall head over heels in love... Great things are stupid as fuck by now but hey your in love who care right??? Well they get even dumber for some unknown reason to you still to this day your kids dad and his family decide to rip your 3 year olkd son away from you and your in a state of total SHOCK and cant seem to even think............ Cant even think........... Your still in shock....... Your son is gone. SEVERAL MONTHS PASS B4 your even allowed to talk to him........ your 3 year old son.... its just you the baby and the psychopath and daily texts from your BFF..... You finally push loosing physical custody and not being abel to have ANY contact with your son of which YOU HAVE COMPLETLY TAKEN CARE OF AND RAISED BY YOUR FUCKING SLEF so deep down insode of you it hurts even to simply think about him but now you get to visit CAUTIOUSLY btw.... Are we done yet??? NOPE!!! Alrigh well now your 23 god damn years old you survived a horrible relationship screaming and fighting, having your 3 year old son ripped away from you DATING A PSYCHOPATH (which has its own uneik set of fucking issues btw like rejection on a constant basis as well as being manipulated into self destruction yourself as well as your life without knowing your doing it) Dating a psychopath.... LOOK IT UP and suddenly out of no fucking ware you go through one of THE MOST INTENSE ONSETS OF SCHIZOPHRENIA most people and doctors could imagine happening to somebody... I mean normally people notice little symptoms like hearing voices and shit... Its already a rare brain disorder but its even less frequent for somebody to go through a full blown psychosis... Thats you... That 1 in 1million out of a billion going through a psychosis RAISING 2 CHILDREN IN LOVE WITH A PSYCHOPATH MENDING A BROKEN RELATIONSHIP WITH THERE CONTROLLING ANGRY FATHER ECT... EVERYONE THINKS YOUR HIGH ON DRUGS AND YOUR NOT.... Also not only are you experiencing this intense onset but your BFF ditches you cuz shes a huge attention whore bitch and suddenly you actually need her to be there ONLY for you and she just cant have that in her life so now your alone in the world... AGAIN!! For several years actually... You spend years recovering yourself your personality your ability to properly communicat eand associate or identify with yourself and the world around you because yeah the onset was that bad... Your relearnign and TEACHING YOURSELF how to human agin (nobody knows nobody gives a fuck) it was bad people... really really bad!!! Okay cool you think you have been through enough so quickly right i mean like within a 3 or 4 year time span you've encountered the worst of the worst for the most part loosing your son giving up week days with you daughter DATING A PSYCHOPATH that stupid relationship that was hugely stressful Did i mention that you were working full time paying all yo bills on yo own taking care of yo kiddow by yourself living essentially completly isolated at least 20 minutes to half an hour away from EVERYBODY you know you indapendent as fuck b4 this onset... SOBER dont even drink!! Your good to go... like good to fucking go... But no during this onset you loose your JOB ($10 an hour mind you that you were bad ass at and loved and ready to retire from) you loose your car you loose your house (for the better part of owning a home you cant live in it anymore) you LOOSE YOUR GOD DAMN MIND LITERALLY its gone schizo psychosis took it from you and held you captive no joke... your insane... considering your an adult now and not a child and your less susceptable to things you should be done by now right... NOPE so your by this point LONELY as fuck and kind of clueless cuz why has life been so hard for me man like i didnt intentionally fuck shit up for myself you know... i really honestly didnt... and you have a new outlook on things which is kind of really uneik considering how things have gone for you, your boundaries thanks to the schizo are all fucked up and off but you have managed to like regain certin aspects of your personality enough to feel strong and confident and your head on going itno life full force with hope and determination you got a year and a half of university under your belt ect... your not done... Your addicted to meth right now... yup whole heartedly consuming the shit out of one of the worst drugs IN THE WORLD right now... You know your addicted (your 26 btw) and your doing your absoulte best to quit (have i mentioned thanks to the schizo you pretty much went a year without physical custody of your other kiddo just so you could actually manage that year and a half in college which killed you every singel day to be away from her so that was hard) well even though your really trying to stop like really trying so hard you call 911 one night and ask an officer for help... okay cool your like a fucking METH ADDICT HERO by all tweeker standards lolz Well you go to some friends for help and instead of keeping it in the family they call DFS and even though you have done EVERYTIHG in your power INCLUDING giving you kiddow to friends of the family to look after while you go to rehab ect... yeah now you actually legally lost custody of your kid... The light of your life is gone... YOU ARE ALONE IN THE WORLD NOW... (both your fucking kids have been taken from you OMFG your entire life has been built arounf being a fuckin parent and now your nothing but a drug addict... they say time dont matter but dang a year on meth and my ENTIRE LIFE DISSAPEARED BEFORE MY EYES) you have nobody and nothing to look forward to on a dily baisis now... what do you do though?? By now youd think with all you been through how lonely you are how much of yourself and your life and the people you love that you have lost youd sink into a full blown life destroying meth addction... NOPE you actually get clean... YOU GOT SOBER OFF METH OF ALL DRUGS against all the odds set before you YOU GOT CLEAN (does anybody care nope) god i mean your not a success story at all by now. Not only have you survived being a single mom at such a young age as well as survived an tramatizing schizophreina onset loosing both of your kids and got away from a PSYCHOPATH but now you have survived a fucking meth addiction... JESUS CHRIST YOUR AN INSPIRATION do people think this about you??? NO not at all... your a looser fuck up crazy weirdo... damn and you thought you were doing good... nope... not yet... All you had through all of this was your mom. figures the strongest person you know is your fucking mom. Like nobody has survived as much shit as your mom accept you by this point. Sooo thanks mom for always being there when i needed you the most.. okay cool so here we are 7 fucking years later things have chilled out FINALLY for sure you got this after all that bull shit your pretty much back to normal and you got shit under control... K well i want you to look around and realize that nobody gives a shit... Your a LEGIT survivor and not one fucking person (welp accept oyur mom cuz shes the only one who really knows) gives a shit and people are constantly judging you thinkning you should have a job and be trying harder at life ect... You not doing the mom thing well enough your not doing the stay at home wife thing well enough your not being a productive member of society ect... Go through all that stereotypical DIFFICULT and CHALLENGING as well as RARE INSANITY and loss and then well and then place yourself under as much scrutiny as you can possibly imagin... Look around and realize that all the people in your life (beside maybe your mom) think your a puriah of the system cuz your living off a dissability check (a whopping $500 a month) a crazy weirdo your nothing but an insane weirdo looser lazy person... The only way anyobody will ever have any respect for you is if you get a pathetic $8 an hour job and pull yourself away from life as you know it now and work like the rest of humanity... GET A FUCKING JOB AND BE A BETTER PARENT BECAUSE YOUR A POS int he eyes of a lot of people close to you... CLEAN YOUR FUCKING KITCHEN AND COOK 9 course meals every single day... Your a looser I feel like dying right now... No joke :/ Im having a really bad fucking day~!!!!! Somebody mail me a fucking gold star okay!!