#mcu oneshot | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

leascorner · 6 months ago

Text

j.b.b. | Secret Santa

Summary: Natasha rigs the Secret Santa because she knows Bucky has a crush on one of his colleagues

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x colleague!f!reader

Warnings: Use of Y/N and feminine pronoums, a few mentions of food, mention of christmas and gifts, two idiots in love

Word Count: 4.1k

A/N: This is the 2nd Xmas OS of the series. My favourite so far. Please do share and like if you enjoyed it, it means a lot!

2024 Christmas Masterlist | Main Masterlist

Secret Santa.

Bucky hated it. He didn’t understand that concept. Buying a gift for someone – needless to say, a coworker that he didn’t know personally – only by obligation. He wondered who had thought of this first and how it had become a so-called tradition. He would have rather like to go to the restaurant, share a drink with the team and be done with it. No, now, he had to choose a piece of paper to select for whom he was going to think about what to give them. Like it wasn’t already pure torture to think about what to buy for his own friends and family.

He had tried his best to leave the room every time Natasha had showed up with her glass filled of all those tiny bits of paper. It was all before she took the matter in her own hands and decided to confront him up right outside his condo at the compound. It was up to three pieces of paper that Natasha had reordered in a particular order after she had showed up at his doorstep.

Bucky could see the ambush from a mile away. She wanted him to pick a particular piece of paper, the one right in front of him. His mind raced through a million of possibilities yet, he couldn’t see why she would act suspiciously. This was just a stupid Secret Santa, one of the too many that would be organized around the world that year. There was no reason for her to trap him. No reason at all…

Still, he couldn’t get himself to pick up the paper directly in front of him. He was smarter than this, he thought; he wouldn’t fall into whatever trap she had lay for him. He rather selected the one piece right at the back; just because it felt like the most rational thing to do. As his hand went to get the paper, he couldn’t help but notice the sly smile that appeared on Natasha’s face. He tried to change his take for the middle piece – the one he had thought she wanted him to select in the first place – but she playfully slapped his hand away.

“You touched it, it’s yours.”

The redhead winked at him as she handed her the tiny bit of paper. A lightning of dread struck Bucky as he understood he had indeed felt into a trap. Unfolding the white paper with his thumbs, his heart missed a beat when he read the name written on it. No doubt now why Natasha had done this on purpose.

It was all because of… Y/N.

Y/N was a Stark employee. She worked on Branner’s team in another wing of the compound and their paths would have never crossed if it wasn’t for Nathasha. Bucky was not sure how it started however, for a while now, the redhead had been teaching a self-defence course every Tuesday night for the Stark Industries employees. Bucky, Steve and Clint had come to help a couple of times and one of those nights was when he was paired with Y/N for an exercise. He spent the night teaching her how to get rid of an attacker if they got their neck from behind.

Afterwards, he seemed to meet her again everywhere: in front of the compound, at Tony’s gala or even at some other Natasha’s courses. They immediately took off. Y/N was doing most of the talking and he liked to hear her voice. They talked mostly about books. She lent him some of the most recent New York Times best sellers and he found for her his favourite’s volumes of poetry – some of the ones that he wouldn’t admit to Steve he had read, back in the days.

Before they met, Bucky had never seen her in the Avengers’ wing, yet Y/N seemed to go more and more to that side of the compound. She went to have a quick break, exchange a book with Bucky or put a cake she had cooked in the kitchen. And this, of course, had not escaped to Natasha’s sharp eyes. Ever since, she had made it her aim of the year to get them together – or at least to get Bucky to confess to Y/N what she thought was his undying love for her.

Bucky could not lie; he indeed found her attractive, both inside and out. Yet, he knew he was just a friend for her. And even if she had the same feeling as him, he was not sure if he wanted to be in a relationship right now… He had a long list of reasons as to why not. He was just accustoming to this life back in the United States. He was gone for long periods of times, working with the Shield on breaking down Hydra. And most importantly, he was risking his life for a living.

He sighed and crumpled the paper in between his fingers, conceding that Natasha had won and that now, he just had to find a gift for Y/N.

A week before the Stark Industries Christmas party – the event at which they would exchange gifts, Bucky was still thinking about what he would buy for Y/N. He had already spent all his free time looking for the perfect gift, but nothing seemed good enough for her. The first thing he had thought about was books. He knew she would always like one however, he didn’t want to buy her some random books. No… he was looking for something a bit more personal. Something that would put stars in her eyes and that would show her how much he appreciated her. Even only as a friend.

Only one week to go before the party and he started to feel a bit panicked. He had even considered asking Natasha for help – this was how stressed he was. However, he quickly made up his mind as he knew she would have liked that a little too much and she would have never let him live it down.

So, when he woke up that morning, he had decided that today was the day. He would finish that report for Steve, and he would search all the Internet for a gift. He would not leave his desk until he had found something.

Three hours later, a headache was slowly crawling right behind the bone of his forehead, and he couldn’t think straight anymore. When he looked up from his laptop screen, he realized he had skipped lunch and that his stomach was rumbling. He would take a break and when he would get back, he would definitely decide on what to buy.

Arriving at the Avengers compound’s kitchen to pick up something to eat, Bucky stopped on the doorstep. Y/N was facing back, making herself what Bucky guessed was a tea. Ever since he randomly took the paper with her name, he had tried to avoid her. Not that it was hard, she was locked in one of Banner’s lab most of the time these days and he was also busy working with Steve on the mission they planned early in the next year. It was not that he did not want to see her. He just felt like anyone could see on his face that he was literally petrified by the idea of offering her something that she wouldn’t like. And he also was pretty sure he couldn’t keep a personal secret even to save his life.

Now that she was slowly turning to the other side, he had no other way than to speak to her. He also knew it would be suspicious if he continued avoiding her for too long.

“Hey Y/N,” he said before going straight to the fridge. Too busy examining its content, he didn’t realise she didn’t respond and only look back to her when she let out a cry, startled to see him there. She had her earphones on that she was now taking off after the original surprise of seeing him.

“Sorry, I hadn’t realised,” he stuttered while pointing to his own ears. He mentally faced palm himself for acting like an idiot. He hadn’t realized that she was wearing workout clothes and probably was just back from a run around the block, just like she did sometimes.

“No worries,” she smiled, “I know I’m not supposed to be here, I’m just picking up a tea and I’ll be gone.”

He waved it off; none of them minded that she used the kitchen – it was made to be used after all. “Good run?”

“Yeah,” she nodded. “Wouldn’t run a marathon, but it clears your head, you know?” Bucky didn’t know, but he could imagine the feeling, his own demons always pretty much present in his own head. They stayed silent for a bit, each of them trying to find a subject for discussion.

Eventually, the fridge beeped loudly, complaining its door had been opened for too long. Bucky leaned forwards to grab some random ingredients to make himself a sandwich while Y/N grabbed her cup of tea and the Tupperware in front of her before making her way out.

“Hey Bucky,” Y/N said just as she was about to leave the kitchen. “I know that we are not supposed to tell who we got for the secret Santa and everything… but would you like to go to the city this weekend? I’ve got some ideas, and I could really help a man’s opinion.” Bucky’s lack of respond made her continue: “I mean, if you’d like. And I could always help you pick up a gift for your Secret Santa as well.” Her cheeks heated up as she realized what she had implied so she was fast to mumble: “If you haven’t already, of course.”

Through he knew this wasn’t a good idea – how could he buy her a gift while she was here – Bucky did the only thing he could do right now – he nodded.

It went without saying that Bucky did not find a gift for Y/N that afternoon. Instead, he spent it imagining the worst scenario about their trip to the city. He couldn’t believe he had accepted and while he thought of excuses not to go, he agreed that it would be a little too suspicious. Once again, he could only resign himself to going on with the flow. After all, it could be a good thing, who else better than Y/N could tell him what she would like…

This was how he ended up picking up Y/N on an early Saturday morning and driving to the city. She had suggested going to a mall and while the idea to visit one on the last weekend before Christmas was not very appealing, he still didn’t have any idea of what he would buy for her. So, he could only agree.

Y/N took advantage of the drive to go through a playlist of the 2000’s songs and educate Bucky on all the most iconic songs. Obviously, Bucky didn’t know any of them, but they had a good laugh when he pointed out a couple of ambiguous lyrics and Y/N realized what they actually meant for the first time.

“Alright so for whom are you looking for?” Bucky asked after they entered the mall. Y/N looked back to him with a startled expression, as if she didn’t expect to have to tell him it seems. “I can keep a secret,” he assured her in return, and she shook her head with a smile.

“Let’s say… My secret Santa is a man,” Bucky nodded, he did know that much, “In his late twenties. Not fond of technologies. Amateur of arts. Doesn’t like attention. Dresses casual, more practical than fashion.”

He laughed, imaging she was talking about Steve and his infamous combination of Jean-T-shirt-Jacket. “Any gift ideas you were thinking of?”

“I was thinking about an accessory. Not something cheap though. An accessory that would go with everything, be of good quality and last a lifetime. Something…” she thought, “Timeless. You know… like a belt or else,” she shrugged.

Bucky nodded, a serious look on his face. He had heard a small weakness in her voice as she was explaining what she was looking for. She was anxious about picking this gift. She wanted to select the right thing. She wanted this present to be impactful. And he was going to help her figuring it out.

“I think the best option is to have a look at what we have here and then we can take it from there. What do you think?”

Y/N nodded, and they happily made their way through the mall. Thankfully, there weren’t too many people at this early time in the morning. They did a couple of menswear shops, asking the sales assistant for advice and inspecting whatever they were suggesting. None of them found something promising.

After the sixth shop, Y/N seemed on the verge of giving up, while Bucky had made it his mission to help her find something. The truth was, if she found something, he was hoping she would forget they were also here for him to find a gift. So, Bucky bribed her by promising her a sandwich before he entered the seventh store.

This one was a vintage store, not a thrift store but a store proposing clothes and accessories inspired by second half of the twentieth century. Y/N went on to ask they showed them the belts they had. The saleswoman happily obliged and got back to them with a dozen of accessories. They ruled out the cowboys’ ones and were left with only four. All black or navy blue. All tanned leather. They would all go with a casual jean or a more formal outfit. Their differences resided only in the details. A most subtle buckle. A few inches larger. A different seam. A different texture.

Y/N stared at them frowning, a small wrinkle in between her brow. Even now, she wasn’t sure which one to pick out. If she was listening to herself, she would probably buy them all. One never had too many belts, did they? Bucky detailed the expression on her face and could help to think she looked cute.

“If this is for the person I think it is,” he didn’t want to say Steve, even if he had no doubt it was him. After all this was supposed to be a secret, “I would go for this one.”

“What about this one?” Y/N pointed out the navy one.

“I personally like it better, but I don’t think he would.”

“You’re sure?” Y/N asked, still chewing on her lower lip.

“One hundred percent,” Bucky acquiesced.

Y/N took all four belts and went to the cashier to pay. Bucky listened from one ear as Y/N and the saleswoman chitchat for a bit. He had a look about what other clothes they had in display and made a mental note to go back sometimes for a bit of shopping for himself.

A couple of minutes later, Y/N was back at her side with a bag containing her gift in a nice white wrapping.

“Thank you so much for your help!”

Y/N gave Bucky a hug with one arm – the one that wasn’t holding the bag – and she seemed to put all her gratitude. When she pulled back, the line between her eyebrows had disappeared and she looked relived, totally pleased with herself.

“Lunch?” Bucky asked.

Just like he had promised, they got a sandwich, a lemonade and sat for a bit. They talked for a while; and for once, about something other than books. They discussed work and somewhat bet on whom was going to offer a gift to whom. When they lifted their head from their sandwich – or their lack of – to be precise, the mall was now teeming with people doing their last-minute shopping. Y/N grimaced and stated her dislike of the crowd, to which Bucky could only agree. How would she be happy to get home after they were done. Bucky then understood under the lines that she had indeed not forget about helping him find a gift for his own Secret Santa.

“So, now,” she talked as she brushed her hands on her pants after having thrown away their sandwiches packaging. “What about you? What are we looking for?”

“I have no idea,” instead of lying, he had decided to be honest at least. “Not that I don’t know the person, I just… don’t know what to get them.”

“Man, woman?”

Bucky was grateful she did not ask him directly who it was. “Woman,” he indicated.

Thinking, Y/N had a look around her as if the shops around were going to give her the solution to all her problems.

“Books?” She suggested, looking back at him. Bucky could help but grimaced; he had already ruled out this option himself. She had already a quite impressive collection of books and while she would like this, it would be way too easy to offer her one.

“Alright, no books then.” She looked around some more, and her eyes landed on a jewellery’s shop. “A jewel, maybe?”

Bucky’s face went blank. He had not thought of this, but it suddenly felt like it was a lot. Who would buy you jewel for a silly Secret Santa? Not a coworker, he was sure of it. It would be too obvious, and besides, he would be offering it in front of everyone. If he were to do that, he was sure Natasha would call him out in front of everyone and he would rather not.

“No worries, doesn’t have to be an engagement ring!” She laughed and God, what a nice sound to hear, he thought. Her playfully making fun of him didn’t ease the restlessness in his stomach though.

“Could be simple earrings or a brooch. What do you think?”

That, Bucky thought was a good idea. Something discreet and that she could wear with everything, yet something that would emphasize her natural beauty. It seems like the best idea he had never had. So, they made their way to the first jewellery’s shop and were quick to make their way out of it. It had too much gold and their jewelleries were too big, too flashy, not her type at all.

They tried a second one where everything seemed so cheap that Y/N wondered out loud if people were really buying from there – once again, Bucky could only agree. They tried a third one in which the salesman immediately took them for a couple. Their cheeks went hot as if they were teenagers caught making out under the bleachers of the gymnasium. After they had denied, they separated to inspect the displays.

Bucky looked over a couple of display cases. When he saw that hair jewellery, he knew it was exactly what he was looking for. A piece discreet, she could use to have their hair up when she was doing experiments in the lab. A jewel she would also be able to wear for a more festive occasion. The only problem was that Y/N was only a couple of meters away and he had no ideas how he would be able to buy it without her knowing it…

“Found something you like?”

Bucky jumped, not having seen Y/N coming back to his level. She had already had a look at the other side of the shop, but nothing had quite caught her eyes. Bucky mumbled something about a pair of earrings he had seen. They were simple, a simple loop, quite small and in a silver. Truth be told, he only thought they were okay, but it wasn’t like he had a lot of options anyway.

Y/N examined them through the Plexiglas and Bucky fiddled with his fingers, obviously anxiously waiting for her opinion.

“Lovely,” was all she said.

“You’re not convinced,” Bucky retorted, a bit bitter.

“No, no,” she shook her head and pointed at her ears. He then realized she didn’t have her ears pierced. “Couldn’t wear them personally as you can see. But these are really lovely, Bucky. Simple and would still go with everything. It’s a good choice.”

Keen to be done with it, Bucky called after the salesman and let him he would buy those ones. He specifically asked for a receipt ticket, in case the person didn’t like them – after all you never knew, he said. In reality, he was already planning to go back before the party and exchange them.

Y/N flashed him the biggest smile when Bucky had retrieved his purchase, and they made their way back to the car. As a gentleman, Bucky opened the car door for her and his cheeks got as hot as hers when she thanked him.

“Thank you as well, for everything! I don’t know how I would have done without you.” Indeed, he would have never found her gift had she not dragged him in this jewellery’s shop.

“Next time, I suggest we do it earlier in December though. The crowd was a nightmare in there.”

Bucky watched as his coworkers, one-by-one, exchanged gifts. There were the most banalities. Some teas. A book. A new cup. A travel-sized bottle of perfume. It only made him more anxious. His own gift sat on his lap seemed to weight a ton. Was this really a good idea? Finally, he blamed himself for not having bought this Christmas novel that was recommended by all bookshops in town. At least, he would have been sure Y/N would have liked it…

Bucky was so lost in his thought that he did not realize right away that it was now Steve opening the gift he had received. A small black box that looked way too small for a belt to fit in it. He frowned as Steve discovered a small iPod Nano and got up to give Tony a hug.

He instantly searched for Y/N, whom he found sat a couple of seats from him. She caught his eyes as if she had been waiting for him to look up at her. Her lips twist into a strange, somewhat nervous smile that Bucky couldn’t quite comprehend. Frowning, he watched as she took the package in front of her before getting up.

Heart racing, he watched as she made her way to him. Only realising what he thought was really happening as she handed him the white package with a sly smile. He unwrapped the package knew exactly what this was in it. Just to think that he thought he had helped to pick out his own present.

To his surprise, he discovered another belt in the box, the one he had really liked that day.

“I asked the saleswoman to get the one you liked when you weren’t watching,” Y/N explained, cheeks definitely as hot as his.

Bucky had to clear his throat. He felt all kinds of emotions looking at the belt in his hands. It was a lot of them, none that he could identify. It created a storm inside of him, though it wasn’t one of those storms that would destroy everything in its path. No… It was a good storm. One of those that had hotness embracing you, making you fell love. And he simply couldn’t believe it. “Thank you.”

“I’m sorry that I- well, I kind of lied to you. I just wanted to get you something- something nice.”

“I know,” he said, taking the package on his lap. “I did too.”

“Me?” Y/N asked as if she couldn’t believe it.

“Yes, you.”

She laughed as she opened it and saw that instead of cute earrings there was a hair jewellery in it. Of course, he didn’t offer her the earrings, she wouldn’t be able to wear them.

She looked back to him with incomprehension in her eyes.

“I went back to exchange it,” Bucky explained, chuckling nervously of this whole situation and coincidence. “Do you like it?”

“Yes! It’s beautiful. Thank you so much!”

Y/N kissed his cheek and hugged him. Her embrace was like the storm actually surrendering him this time. Around them, everyone continued to exchange gifts, but Bucky couldn’t care. They probably had never been this close. His nose was in her hair, and he could smell the perfume of her shampoo. He never wanted to let go.

On the other side of the table, he saw Natasha winked at him. The enormous smile on her face made him think it was indeed not a coincidence that Y/N also draw his name, but at this moment, he couldn’t care less. He had everything he needed.

#jbb #lea's writing #lea's 2024 christmas series #christmas fic #bucky x f!reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes one shot #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky fluff #bucky barnes x female reader #mcu imagine #mcu oneshot #marvel imagine #marvel one shot

1K notes · View notes

narcissisticmf · 7 months ago

Text

get up | bucky barnes x fem!reader

description: y/n is not a morning person and bucky tries everything in his power to ease her into the start of the day.

trigger warnings: fluff, some seductive behavior, domestic!bucky, etc. read at your own risk.

word count: <1k

The sun slipped its way through the closed curtains, shining brightly into the room. Your body was entangled within the sheets and thick blankets among your queen sized bed. You grumbled softly as the morning sun hit your eyes, causing you to slowly shield your face behind the thick blanket, no desire to get up yet.

You felt Bucky stir beside you, your back facing him. He must've been waking up. You felt his right arm slip protectively around your stomach, making you to groan softly.

You loved Bucky's affection, but receiving it early in the morning was something you were trying to get yourself used to. You hated physical affection in the morning and, of course, Bucky knew this but that didn't stop him.

"Mornin', sweetheart," Bucky mumbled into your ear with resonance. You gently moaned, clearly not ready to get up yet.

"You want some tea?" he asked, nibbling gently on your earlobe. You stayed quiet, but turned over to face him. You were so tired, and something unusual made you nestle closer to hin that morning. Your face disappeared into his chest and beneath the covers as his arms engulfed you tightly.

"Look at you.." Bucky whispered with a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. You released a soft huff and breathed in his scent. "What's got you so soft this morning, hm?"

"Shh," you whispered with a soft whine, no desire to speak yet.

To this, Bucky laughed. He pressed a warm kiss to your temple.

After a few moments of stillness that enveloped the room, Bucky dipped his chin down and pressed a lingering kiss to the apple of your cheek. "Cmon, sweetheart," he whispered as softly as possible. "Time to get up."

"Nooo," you dragged out softly.

"Yesss," he mimicked your tone with a smile.

"Bucky," you huffed and lifted your chin to look up at him. Your hair was matted against your forehead, your eyes glassed over the iridescent glimmer of them, and your lips were dry, slightly chapped.

"Y/N," Bucky smiled, sat up while leaning on his elbow, and cupped your face with his hands. You shivered at the cold touch of his metal arm, but relished in the light thrill.

"There's my girl," he grinned and leaned down to press a kiss to your nose. "Good morning."

"Morning," you couldn't fight your smile as Bucky leaned down to pepper kisses across your jawline and neck. You rested your head against the pillows and fluttered your eyes closed, admiring the feel of his warm lips against your cold skin.

He halted at your collarbone and seemed to question with his eyes if he should keep going. When you didn't protest, he sucked the skin over your bone.

Your body shuttered, leaving gooseflesh across your exposed arms.

"I felt that," Bucky smirked.

"Shut up," you laughed and nudged him off you.

He didn't fight you and laughed, shuffling off the bed. He turned to look down at you, still beneath the covers.

"How'd I get so lucky, hm?" Bucky crossed his arms over his chest and stared down at you with such an intense gaze, you felt your face go hot.

"Bucky," you whined softly and covered your face with the blankets.

"No, no, please.. don't cover that beautiful face," Bucky implored pathetically, leaning against the mattress to tug the sheets away.

You giggled when he clearly won the tug-o-war battle.

"There she is," Bucky grinned. "Come on, I'll make us breakfast."

This time, you happily obliged.

a/n: hi cuties!! i know ive been gone for a hot minute, i've just been swamped with my classes. i'm taking 4 lit classes this semester 🙄 someone tell me why i thought that was a good idea. ANYWAY ,, i hope yall liked this one! i've been seeing sm bucky content bc of thunderbults (can't wait to see that btw) so i thought to write a cute little fic this morning with him. and seeing sebastian talk shit on donald trump to the press is so sexy to me 🤭 okok i'll stop fangirling!! love yall! have a nice thanksgiving to my u.s. friends who celebrate! — angelina.

679 notes · View notes

triptuckers · 1 month ago

Text

you're not alone - bob reynolds

Request: nope Pairing: bob reynolds x reader Summary: when you wake up early, you find out you're not the only one who's awake Warnings: THUNDERBOLTS SPOILERS !! bit of angst (happy ending I promise), mentions of nightmares, mentions of past trauma, loss of loved ones, bob being a lil sad :( Word count: 2.5K A/N: listen it's very simple. I saw thunderbolts. I saw lewis pullman. that's it. enjoy!

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

your eyes snap open as you blindly reach for the knife you keep under your pillow. but instead of an intruder, your blade meets empty space.

the only sound in your dimly lit room is your heavy breathing. damn these stupid nightmares. you were close to asking yelena if she could just knock you out so you could get some sleep.

you return the knife and lay back down.

but now that you're awake, and adrenaline is coursing through your body, it's hard to go back to sleep again. you haven't really spoken about it to anyone, but you know you're not the only one who has nightmares.

yours got worse after a mission was intense or had nearly gone wrong. you'd been doing the odd job here and there for valentina when she'd send you to go after someone who was going to rob one of her facilities.

but when you finally made it to the vault, you weren't met with just any robber. instead, you were met with a bunch people who seemed to have gotten the exact same assignment as you.

you were all there to kill each other. messy ends tying up themselves. after all, doing the dirty work was what you were good at. it's what you were trained for. follow orders, go in and out quickly, get the job done.

but instead of fighting these people, you worked together once you figured out valentina's real plan.

the next couple of days were a whirlwind of adrenaline, fighting, a lot of confusion and very little sleep.

you'd been trying to catch up on rest now that you've got a room in the former avengers tower, but after reliving your worst memories, the nightmares came back stronger and more intense than ever. all the details were there now, and you couldn't forget them.

you finally had a place where you could safely rest, and yet you didn't get more than two hours of sleep a night - if you were lucky.

you're looking around the room now. devoid of personality. you didn't have many personal belongings to take with you. mostly the weapons you carried and the clothes on your back.

taking yelena's advice, you'd gotten dark curtains to keep out the light. she said it helped her fall asleep. it didn't really help you much, but you were grateful for her advice nonetheless.

there's a dim glow coming from a gap in the curtains. you push the sheets off of you and walk over to the window.

way down below, new york was slowly waking up. people on their way to their work, or out on an early morning run. you glance over your shoulder at the alarm clock. almost 5 am. not too bad. it's more morning than night, and you decide that's acceptable for today.

you pull on a pair of socks and blindly grab a sweater. maybe you could use the extra time you got now by planning in an extra training session. it always helped clear your mind after a short night filled with bad dreams.

the hallway is dark when you exit your room. as you make your way to the kitchen, you wonder what else you could do today. there weren't any missions for you planned.

bucky was off on an assignment with sam, and alexei hadn't been home for a little over a week. maybe you could ask yelena or ava if they were up for a sparring session.

you enter the kitchen, not bothering to turn on the big light as you open the fridge.

the light seeps out and illuminates a figure standing on the other end of the kitchen island.

you reach for the nearest kitchen knife as bob turns on the light.

'jesus.' you breathe. 'bob. you scared me.'

'sorry!' says bob, visibly upset that he startled you. 'I'm sorry! I thought you saw me.'

'you're good, don't worry about it.' you say, returning the kitchen knife. 'I'm just a little jumpy, that's all.'

'I was about to make breakfast, do you want some as well?' asks bob.

'yeah sure, that sounds nice.' you say. 'thanks.'

bob walks over to you and smiles. somehow you didn't understand how someone like bob could also be the void. the two seemed so different from each other.

you make coffee as bob gets started on breakfast for the two of you. you pour a cup for bob and slide it over to him. then you take your own cup and move to sit at the kitchen island.

'what were you doing up this early?' he asks.

'couldn't sleep.' you say.

'nightmares?'

'yes.'

there's no point in lying. everyone here has nightmares. you'd be terrified of one of your new roommates if they didn't. you didn't live a life like the one you did and be able to sleep at night.

'want to talk about it?' says bob.

you really appreciate bob. he's always helping you, telling you he'll listen to you. always the first to welcome you back when you return to the tower after a mission. and right now, he's making you breakfast.

but as much as you appreciate him, reliving your worst trauma's because of the void was something that felt too personal to share. especially since bob doesn't remember anything.

you'd told him about the day the void had half of new york trapped in their most traumatic moments. you figured he deserved to know. you also knew he felt terrible about it, and you didn't want to remind him of it.

'no, it's fine.' you say.

bob nods as he turns around and sets a plate with eggs in front of you, as well as some toast.

'thanks.' you say as bob sits down next to you with his own plate. you notice he's careful not to touch you. he doesn't really talk about what happened, but you know it's hard for him. you just don't want to push him. he'll talk to you when he's ready. but you're desperate for him to know it's okay to talk to you, should he choose to do so.

you study his face as he eats his breakfast. you know he's tired too. he was awake when you went to bed last night, and he was up before you as well. the dark circles under his eyes seem to be permanent.

'bob?' you say.

he turns to look at you.

'why were you awake?'

'I was up all night reading a book yelena got me. it was so interesting I couldn't put it away.'

'bob. you told me that last week.'

'I did?'

'yes. when I asked you why you were still awake when I got back from a meeting at 3 am.'

'oh.'

you turn your chair to fully face him. bob leans back, so you're not accidentally touching him.

'what is going on, bob? I know we're all tired. but at least I get a handful of hours of sleep at night. do you sleep at all?' you say.

bob looks everywhere but your eyes.

'what are your nightmares about?' he asks you, catching you off guard.

'uh, well. bad stuff.' you say.

'will you tell me about it?'

'I'd rather not.'

'then I won't tell you why I don't sleep.'

bob grabs his plate gets up and instinctively, you reach out to grab his sleeve and pull him back.

he inhales sharply and recoils from your touch. the plate falls from his hands and clatters back down on the counter.

'sorry!' you say.

you see bob close his eyes and clench his jaw. you had made a mistake.

'I'm sorry.' you say again. 'I just... don't really talk about what happens in my nightmares. what I have to relive at night.'

your last sentence catches his attention.

'relive?' he says.

'fuck, did I say relive?' you say. 'I meant-'

'did I make it worse?' says bob.

'I didn't mean-' you start.

'don't do that!' bob cuts you off.

you raise your hands as a gesture of surrender.

this time, bob is the one to apologise. 'sorry. it's just that everyone always says this team is built on trust and yet no one seems to trust me. I'm not a child, you don't need to act all careful around me. you don't have to hide the bad stuff from me just because I can't remember what I, what the void, does.'

you're silent as you watch him fidget with the empty coffee cup in his hands. and you realise he's right. you can't tiptoe around him all the time. it's not fair.

'okay.' you say.

'okay?' questions bob, looking at you.

'okay, I'll tell you what my nightmares are about. but then you tell me why you don't sleep, deal?' you say.

'deal.' says bob.

'let's go to your armchair though, I don't want john accidentally walking in on me spilling my secrets.' you say, trying to lighten the mood.

bob is silent as he follows you. he sits down in his chair and you sit down on the couch next to him.

you take a deep breath as bob looks at you.

'as you know, I had a training that was similar to yelena's. I was young, and was trained to be a mindless soldier, assassin, whatever they called it at the time.' you say.

you look out over the skyline of new york, choosing to focus on bob's presence next to you, in case the memories start to drown you.

'I was training night and day. with other kids, then with older trainers, and then with holograms. to test every single probability, variable, whatever. then came the final round of training. holograms designed to look like the people I loved the most. friends I had when I was younger, my family. in a simulation, I was to kill them over and over again. I wore this specifically designed suit so everything felt real.' you say.

you look at the rising sun in the distance, aware of the way bob's eyes are fixed on you.

you take a deep breath. 'the final test, it was not a simulation. there was no holographic target. except I wasn't told that. I put on the suit, the glasses, everything that went with it. and then I killed everyone I'd ever loved. when I got the clear to take off the suit, the room was stained red. I was looking at the bodies of my friends, my family. that was the day I succeeded the program. I had nothing anyone could use against me. no one who would remember me.'

you quickly wipe away a stray tear that had fallen down your cheek. 'I relive that memory every night. except when the void got to me, it felt like it did that day. it felt real.'

bob is silent as you take a few deep breaths, trying to steady yourself.

'that's why I don't sleep.' he says in a soft voice.

you turn to look at him.

'what do you mean?' you say.

'what you described, your worst memory. to have to relive it in such a real way. I did that.' he says. 'I do that to people.'

'no.' you say, moving closer to him. 'no, bob, the void does that to people. not you. you hear me?'

'still though, he's a part of me.' says bob, who hasn't moved away from you this time. your knees almost touch.

'I don't sleep because I'm afraid if I wake up, days will have passed. and I won't have any memory of any harm I've done to people.' bob confesses in a soft voice.

'oh, bob.' you say. you wanted nothing more than to reach out and pull him in for a hug, but you know you can't.

'I'm terrified of hurting you guys again. I don't know how to stop him if it would happen again.' says bob. 'I don't want to go to sleep alone. what if I wake up somewhere else?'

'well..' you say. 'that's easily solvable.'

'how?' says bob.

you shrug. 'we share a room. or I can sit next to you when you go to sleep in your own room. or if you take a nap in your chair, here. anywhere, really.'

'and then what? what if the- what if he takes over? what if-'

'then I'll try my best to wake you. I'll go through all of those rooms to find you.'

'you just told me what you had to relive. I wouldn't want you to go through that again. not for my sake, anyway.'

'bob. how many times do I have to tell you for you to finally understand it? you are not alone anymore. we've got you. I've got you.'

bob looks at you with an odd look in his eyes.

'I really wish I could hug you.' he says.

you smile. 'you can.'

'but-'

'stand up.'

he gives you a confusing look but does as you ask. you stand up as well, then gesture at him.

'you're taller than I am. so long as your hands don't touch any of my skin, we should be good.' you explain.

'I don't want to accidentally send you back.' mumbles bob.

'you won't. I trust you.' you say.

you step closer to him and wrap your arms around his waist, resting your head against his chest. you feel his muscles strain as he tenses at your touch. then you slowly feel his hands carefully rest on your back.

you wonder when the last time was anyone hugged him. you long to be closer to him, to press your face in his neck, but you stand still.

'thank you.' says bob softly when you finally pull away. you smile up at him.

'see? told you it would be okay. now, do you want to go and take a nap? we can still get up in time for everyone else to wake up, if you want to.' you say.

'that sounds nice.' admits bob.

you look at him and a part of you swears he looks happier than before. or at least lighter. maybe he just needed to get this fear off of his chest. maybe you needed someone to listen to you as well.

something in you shifts as you follow bob to his room so he could take a nap.

'can't remember the last time I voluntarily went to sleep.' says bob as he enters his room. 'you'll be here?'

'I'll be here.' you confirm. 'and I'll get you out if the void takes over.'

'you promise?' says bob, as he lays down and pulls the covers over his body.

'I promise.' you say as you listen to his breathing become heavier until he falls asleep and soft snores fill the room. you'd stay next to him for as long as he needed you to.

A/N: thanks for reading! everything that I have written can be found on my masterlist. please do not copy, translate, plagiarise or repost my work! some of these are requested by other people and I spend a lot of time and effort on my works <3 much love, marit

190 notes · View notes

marie-swriting · 2 months ago

Text

Normal - Bucky Barnes

Marvel Masterlist

Summary : Following his therapist recommendation, Bucky decides to go to the library where books aren't the only things that interest him.

Warnings : this is just me romanticizing my job lmao, TFATWS!Bucky Barnes, a bit of angst, happy ending, mention of Bucky's traumas and nightmares, Raynor being a bad therapist, maybe some grammatical mistakes as English is not my first languaga, tell me if you see some or if I missed any warnings.

Word count : 4.6k

French version

Sitting on therapist Christina Raynor’s uncomfortable couch, Bucky’s gloved hands are intertwined and rest on his legs. He keeps shifting position, unease like he always is at every therapy session.

It’s a waste of time, that's what he keeps telling himself. He listens to his therapist repeating the same three damn rules and taking her notebook everytime he finally dares to open his mouth. He’s about to scream in frustration, he can feel it. If it was up to him, he would have stopped coming a long time ago.

“Do you ever leave your apartment?” Raynor asks, haughty.

“I come here every week, don’t I? And I go to the restaurant once a week,” Bucky replies, defensive.

“Alone, I imagine.”

“No with someone.”

“Miracles do happen!” she exclaims, ironic. “What else do you do?”

At her question, Bucky stays silent, staring at her. Raynor rolls her eyes and sighs.

“James, if you stay at home brooding, you’re not going to move on. You have to do normal things.”

“I haven’t known ‘normal’ for ninety years now, Doc.”

“You have to go out, have a hobby, see people, answer to Sam when he calls you, for example. Let people in. Believe it or not but not everyone wants to attack you.”

“Weirdly enough I always feel like this, I mean between the brainwashing, running away from the government and Thanos who made me lose another five years of my life, I don’t know why it’s the case,” he retorts before her therapist takes her notebook and starts writing. “Why do you do the notebook thing again? I said nothing wrong.”

“We’re done for today,” Raynor says, putting her pen down. “Do what I said, find yourself a hobby.”

To answer, Bucky sighs loudly which Raynor writes in her blasted notebook. Without glancing at her, Bucky stands up from the couch, just as grumpy as when he arrived, if not more.

On the way to his apartment devoid of any warmth, Bucky thinks back to what his therapist told him. A hobby? What an idea! He hasn’t had a hobby for so long that he doesn’t even know what he liked to do back in the forties, besides keeping Steve out of trouble. He searches for a pastime the whole night yet, nothing seems appealing. At this rate, he’ll end up improvising when she’ll ask him about what he did, it’ll be easier.

As everytime Bucky closes his eyes, he wakes up with a start, even more exhausted than he was before falling asleep. Only the noise and the light coming for the T.V. remind him he’s at home and not in one of his numerous nightmares. He has everything around him to feel safe and yet, his brain is still in fight or flight mode.

With difficulty, he stands from the ground and walks to the bathroom. In the room, he splashes water on his face and takes a moment to breathe. Once his breathing is calmer, Bucky goes back to the living room and sits on his makeshift bed on the floor. His eyes are set on the T.V. as he tries to distract himself, though his brain takes over and thinks a million thoughts at the same time. Bucky can’t keep track of all of them, though he’s used to it by now. He does the exercises Raynor taught him, it’s one of the few useful things he’s learned from therapy.

Bucky reminisces about Steve and the way he had managed to adapt to the future. Instinctively, Bucky’s eyes go to his jacket near the door where Steve’s notebook is. Although he uses it for a different purpose, Bucky tells himself maybe he should do like Steve and try to catch up with all the culture he’s missed. Before the war, he loved reading, maybe this could be his hobby again? Reading. But how can he do it? He doesn’t know what books have come out in the past decades and besides, reading won’t make him more social. He has to find a spot where he can read and meet people. Suddenly, he remembers the day his mother had made him and his sisters library cards in the neighbourhood library. He can still picture the way the place was arranged which reassures him - every memory he has in mind is a victory. The library seems obvious now, he has to go there, that might help him and Raynor will finally get off his back.

The next day, Bucky walks to the library closer to his place. Reluctantly, he enters the building. He just has the time to walk through the door when he hears your voice greeting him. Bucky nervously smiles before walking closer to you.

“May I help you, Sir?” you ask with a warming smile.

“Yes, I’d like to make a library card, please.”

“Sure, do you know how our library works?”

Considering last time he ever set foot in a library everything was done by hand, it’s as if Bucky knew nothing about it so he shakes his head.

“Not really.”

“First thing first, the card is free for every New York resident and to make the card, I’ll only need an ID and a proof of address. You can borrow fifty items at once and the loan lasts three weeks, except for magazines, it’s only one. If needed, you can renew your loan on the website, the app or you can ask us to do it. If you’re fourteen days late, you’ll be charged. You can also put items on hold in case they’re not available at a given moment and you’ll have seven days to come pick them up. Do you have any questions?” you question and Bucky needs a second to take in everything you said. “I know it’s a lot of information at once so don’t hesitate if you need any clarification.”

“I think I got it.”

“Perfect,” you say while he hands you the documents you need. “Thank you.”

On your computer, you start creating his file. You write down his full name first then you ask him if he has a preferred name he’d like to be included in his file to which he tells you his nickname. After hearing his answer, you can’t help but think these pieces of information sound familiar. You don’t know where you heard them yet his name and face aren’t unknown to you. You keep completing the information and as soon as you have to write down his birth date, everything makes sense. People born in 1917 and who look like your age aren’t something you see on a daily basis. You understand he’s Captain America’s best friend, you vaguely remember your history class about World War Two. However, even if you’re taken aback by the identity of the man in front of you, you don’t show anything so as to not make him uncomfortable.

Once you’re done, you hand him his library card with a big smile. Bucky’s right gloved hand brushes past yours and he quickly puts the card in his back pocket.

“Would you like me to give you a tour?” you propose.

“You probably have better things to do,” Bucky replies, shifting from one foot to the other.

“That’s what I’m here for, I don’t mind at all.”

Bucky is still hesitating, yet the minute he glances on his left and sees the size of the place, he feels overwhelmed. He’s about to refuse when he remembers he has to learn how to have an ordinary life again and being social is a part of it.

“If it’s not too much, then I’d love to, please.”

“Follow me.”

You leave your chair and stand in front of Bucky, enthusiasm written all over your face. You start talking about the first shelves in front of you and then walk through the library as if it was your home. Although Bucky struggles retaining what every corner is about, he has to admit he loves seeing your radiant face while you’re talking.

As opposed to him, you’re full of life and your passion for your work can be felt a thousand miles away. He listens to your every word, completely captivated by your voice. Once you’ve shown him the most important places, you turn to him.

“That’s it! Are you searching for something in particular? Or do you want to wander on your own?”

“Well, actually, I was told Tolkien published several books after The Hobbit and I would love to read them,” he says, scratching behind his neck.

“I’m going to show you where his books are,” you inform, walking toward the correct shelf. “So, I recommend you read The Lord Of The Rings trilogy which goes hand in hand with The Hobbit. The first book is this one, The Fellowship Of The Ring,” you explain, taking the item out. “The second must be currently unavailable but if you want, we can put it on hold for you or you can do it on the app at home.”

“I haven’t read in a long time, I don’t know how long it’ll take me to read. I think I’m just going to focus on this one first and I’ll see later.”

“As you wish,” you affirm, giving him the book.

This time, Bucky is careful not to brush your fingers, still struggling to feel comfortable with people touching him.

“I’m going to leave you alone now, you’ll probably want to look around for next time. When you’re done, come to me or one of my colleagues for the loan. Once again, if you have any question, don’t hesitate,” you finish.

“Thanks, for everything.”

“Don’t mention it. Enjoy your book.”

You give him one last smile before turning around and you go back to your desk. Bucky watches you leave, enthralled by your every movement. The minute you’re out of his sight, he quickly shakes his head and gazes at the books in front of him, searching for something else interesting to read for later.

Surprisingly, Bucky reads Tolkien’s novel in less than a week. He thought he’d need more time to get back to reading and Bucky can’t deny he’s pleased to see he fall back to one of his habits easily.

During his therapy session, Bucky talks about his trip to the library with a smug smile when Raynor starts to imply he surely didn’t listen to her. She has her eyes wide open before asking him about his outing. Without any surprise, Bucky goes straight to the point. He doesn't even mention you, the beautiful librarian who has slowly found his way into his mind.

At the end of his session, Bucky doesn’t go home right away, wanting to give back the book. He expects to see you, sitting behind the computer with a welcoming smile on your face, however it’s a woman in her fifties who greets him. Your colleague might be nice, Bucky would have preferred to see your face and as surprising as it may seem, he would have loved to tell you about his reading. Unfortunately for him, besides not seeing you, the last two Lord Of The Rings books aren’t available so he simply puts them on hold thanks to your colleague before going home, empty-handed.

As soon as Bucky gets the notification the books have arrived, he doesn’t waste a second before leaving his apartment. He can’t wait to keep reading, the last two weeks went by slowly.

As he arrives, he finds you at your usual spot behind your screen. You give him a big smile before going on the shelf behind you where all the items on hold are - when you saw the two books were for Bucky, you hoped to be here when he’d get them. Bucky doesn’t even have to show you his library card that you’re already doing the loan.

“I have to admit, I was disappointed to see the first book back, I was hoping to have your opinion on it when you were done,” you inform.

“Well, just like the first time I read Tolkien, he knows how to keep me on tenterhooks. Your recommendation was perfect,” Bucky answers, happy to know you’re curious to know what he thinks.

“The Lord Of The Rings is always a safe choice. So you want to read the last two books in a row?” you question, referencing the novel you still have in hand.

“Yeah, I have a lot of free time, so better to make the most of it.”

“You’re absolutely right. Here you go,” you add, giving them to him.

This time, Bucky doesn’t stop your hands from touching his, he even lingers for a second before taking the novels out of your hands, making this moment last which you don’t seem to mind. No matter if he can’t feel the softness of your skin through his gloves, he appreciates this closeness.

“I’d love to read them for the first time again,” you exclaim with nostalgia.

“Are they your favorite books?”

“They’re my childhood so yeah, they are. Everytime I read them, I just want to live an adventure just like them.”

“I get it,” Bucky genuinely smiles before looking at the clock behind you. “I have to go.”

“Oh, sure. Enjoy your books.”

“Thank you.”

Bucky awkwardly smiles one last time before leaving the place, his two books in his hands. Bucky is happy he saw you.

Even though your conversations don’t last, when he talks to you, he feels normal. With you, he’s just another person going to the library, not the ex-soldier who was turned into a weapon against his will. You bring him a sense of normalcy he never thought he could have and a part of him doesn’t know how to react to this.

Bucky hadn’t read this much in a long time. First of all, because he absolutely wanted to finish The Lord Of The Rings, but also because he wanted an excuse to go back to the library.

That day, Bucky has to go to therapy first. As always, he doesn’t feel like Raynor is helping him that much. Other than telling about the rules and making him feel guilty for not moving on, she doesn’t say anything new. Even telling her he’s making an effort by seeing people at the library isn’t enough for her anymore. She affirms he should go somewhere where he could exchange with people like a book club. No matter what he does, it’s never enough.

Consequently, he goes to your workplace, irritated. He keeps brooding at every step he takes, telling himself everything he wishes to say if this therapy had no consequence on his future. His annoyance increases the second he doesn’t see you at your desk. Maybe you took the day off? Or maybe you’re working in the backroom today? No matter the reason, your absence ruins his day.

At that moment, he realises your presence might be more important to him than he previously thought. His mood definitively depends on if he sees you or not. He finds himself pathetic. After all, you’re only friendly because it’s your job to be nice to the people who come talking to you. He’s not your friend or your acquaintance, he’s just another person coming to the library among others. Besides, even if you were friends, who says you’d be as attached to him as he is to you? You have a normal life, you have better things to do rather than hanging out with someone as broken as him. Bucky can’t even open up to his therapist so he doesn’t deserve your attention and he wouldn’t want it anyway. Bucky thinks he doesn’t deserve someone who cares about him and he wouldn’t want to drag them to the fight he always finds himself dragged into. You’re too full of joy to see only one percent of the horrors he has witnessed.

Bucky loudly sighs before walking toward the novels sections. There, he lazily searches for a title that could intrigue him. Though, nothing catches his eye. He’s too focused on his irritation and his self-deprecation to be interested in something else. Bucky keeps wandering until he hears a voice coming from behind him.

“Good afternoon, Sergeant Barnes. How are you today?”

“Oh, hi,” Bucky states, turning to you, his bad mood leaving his body in an instant. “No need to call me Sergeant, Bucky is enough. I mean, if you don’t mind. Sorry, it probably was inappropriate what I just said,” he adds, embarrassed.

“Don’t worry, Bucky,” you reassure him. “So,” you resume, enthusiastically, “you’re done with Tolkien?”

“Yeah, I finished it last night.”

Bucky nonchalantly gives you this information; however, he didn’t finish the book because he couldn’t put it down, but because his nightmares prevented him from feeling safe enough to sleep. Notwithstanding, you don’t need to know that. After all, you’re only the librarian.

“You’re searching for something new to read?”

“Yeah, but I have no idea what.”

“Oh, I can help, if you want to. And don’t say you don’t want to bother me, it’s literally my job.”

“I’d love your help, please,” Bucky accepts with joy.

“Do you want to keep reading Fantasy or do you want to try a new genre?”

“I’d like to try a new genre. Maybe Science-Fiction? I have always been fascinated by technologie we would develop in the future. I mean, I’m so fascinated by it it became my life,” he darkly jokes, before becoming serious again. “Anyway, what do you suggest?”

“I think you should start with the basics. I suppose you’ve already read some H. G. Wells?”

“Yes, I read some of his books but there were others I kept telling myself I should read and never did.”

“Like any self-respecting reader would. I recommend you should try The Dream or The First Men In The Moon.”

At the same time you say the titles, you take the books out of the shelves. You hand them to Bucky and he’s disappointed once he realizes your hand didn’t touch his like last time. However, he quickly focuses back on what you’re saying, not wanting to be more unsettled.

“I haven’t read them in quite some time but I remember I loved them! I couldn’t stop talking to my loved ones about these books for months. My poor mom was tired of me by the end. If you want to discover a whole new author, I suggest Stephen King and his novel Firestarter. King is one of the most famous authors nowadays and he has a long list of books. He writes a lot of horror so if you want to try this genre, you can look for him.”

“I’m going to start with Wells, I know him so it’ll be easier, I think,” he says, showing the books he’s holding.

“We have other books of his that aren’t currently available, don’t hesitate to tell me if you want to put them on hold.”

“I will, thanks a lot.”

“Don’t mention it,” you exclaim with enthusiasm.

“Y/N, can you come?” one of your colleagues asks. “I need your help for tomorrow's activity.”

“I’m coming,” you reply to her before turning to Bucky. “You’ll tell me what you think about it, will you?”

“I will,” he affirms, feeling his heart missing a heartbeat in his chest, realizing you’re genuinely interested in his opinion.

“Enjoy your book.”

On those words, you walk away from Bucky before listening to your colleague. Bucky gazes at the books you suggested and he reads the back covers. Convinced by The Dream, Bucky puts the other one down before borrowing the novel.

In his apartment, Bucky thinks back to your interaction. He could have listened to you talk about books for hours. Though, the more he thinks about you, the less he’s sure it’s a good idea to be this close to you. Despite yourself, you bring him comfort and according to him, he doesn’t deserve it. His demons are too present to let the light come in his life. Bucky keeps overthinking and he ends up closing himself off.

The small effort he did when he created his library card is shattered. He still has a lot of improvement to do before getting closer to you. He began having feelings for you quicker than he thought and he has to stop this. As a consequence, Bucky decides to not see you again and for this, he tells himself that after this book, he will bring it back the day he knows you’re not here and he won’t step foot on your workplace ever again. He’s better off alone.

Nevertheless, Bucky’s isolation was interrupted by the arrival of John Walker as the new Captain America and the Flag Smashers. With Sam and after a few snags in this new collaboration, they found a way to calm down the tensions and Bucky finally made peace with his past.

Now, he accepts he has the right to comfort, to be okay. He hates to admit it nevertheless his therapist was right, opening up to people he trusts is beneficial and he’s lucky that, despite his grumpiness, Sam didn’t give up on him.

Bucky is in Louisiana at the Wilsons' residence. He manages to meet other people and his smiles are more genuine than ever.

One afternoon, while Sam and Bucky are fixing the Wilsons’ boat, Bucky brings up his outing at the library and your name comes up several times which instantly grabs Sam’s attention. With a malicious look, Sam mentions the topic again.

“Looks like you get along well with the librarian.”

“She’s nice. She has good recommendations and she’s full of energy. Thanks to her, I felt like I was having an ordinary life once more,” Bucky confesses with a loving gaze.

“‘Was’? What do you mean?” Sam asks, frowning.

“I haven’t gone to the library in a long time.”

“Why?”

“In case you forgot, we were a bit busy.”

“Oh, I know, but I feel like there’s something else.”

“Maybe…,” Bucky starts, avoiding his eyes, “Maybe I closed myself off when I realised I started having feelings for her.”

Following his confession, Sam stops what he’s doing and stares at his friend, desperate. Bucky sighs before resuming.

“Look, it’s not that easy, okay? Sure, I’m feeling better now, but the fact is I know a part of the Winter Soldier will never leave me. I still have my nightmares. I can’t have someone else drag into all of this,” he admits, his heart tightening in his chest. “I don’t even know why I’m making such a big deal out of it. She probably wasn’t interested in me like I am.”

“You’ll never know if you keep ignoring her.”

“I’m not ignoring her.”

“It sure looks like it,” Sam retorts with a pointed look. “You should talk to her. With what you told me, I can tell she has a good influence on you and besides, Mr-With-A-Staring-Problem has heart eyes for her.”

“I don’t need you to throw me into another woman’s arms so I won’t flirt with your sister,” Bucky jokes, hoping to aggravate Sam so he’ll change the subject.

“You better not flirt with her, period. Anyway, that’s not my point, you clearly have feelings for her and maybe it’s time you date someone and someone who has a normal life might not be such a bad idea,” Sam states and Bucky ponders his words for a second.

“I don’t know, Sam.”

“Ask her out. What do you gotta lose? She might be a good friend, if it doesn’t work romantically.”

“The last date I went to wasn’t my biggest achievement,” he reminds him.

“You weren’t in the right state of mind. You should try. At least, like this, I’ll be sure you won’t get close to Sarah.”

“I wanted to ask her something by the way,” Bucky adds, pretending to walk away.

“Fix the boat and shut up.”

Bucky laughs at Sam’s desperation and focuses back on his work. While they’re fixing the boat, Bucky thinks back about what Sam told him. He’s not going to lie, he thought about seeing you again, however the shame of coming back after being away for so long holds him back. The last time he saw you, you were so happy, telling he’d have to tell you what he thought of Wells’ novel and yet, he avoided you like the plague. He doesn’t really know how to come back. You won’t chase him away from the library, he hasn’t violated any rules, but surely, you’ll be cold with him. He ruined everything.

However, Bucky ends up being convinced by Sam’s words and decides to go back to the library the day he comes back from Louisiana. He thinks about what he’s going to tell you nevertheless nothing seems good enough so he decides he’ll improvise.

As soon as he’s arrived, he sees your colleagues at the front desk; he greets them and then walks around the shelves, hoping to find you which he does. From afar, he sees you putting kitchen books on a shelf. He takes a deep breath and walks to you. Once he’s near you, he clears his throat to catch your attention which startles you and you turn around. With just one glance, you discover Bucky without his jacket and his gloves for the first time, allowing you to see his vibranium arm.

“Oh, hi.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s okay. It’s been a long time! You didn’t even tell me what you thought about The Dream,” you say with a disappointed face.

“I loved it. I forgot how much I enjoy H. G. Wells’ books.”

“I’m glad to hear this. Do you want me to recommend something else?” you ask, excited.

“Yes, please.”

“Another genre or still Sci-Fi?”

“I thought about trying romance,” Bucky states, looking you straight in the eyes.

“Oh, well, we have a bit of everything,” you start, nervous, ignoring if you should read in between the lines. “Stories with sad endings, happy ones, relationships full of tensions and a lot of plot twists.”

“I was thinking about a story where the guy desperately tries to find a way to ask the beautiful librarian out,” Bucky adds with a charming smile.

“That’s a very specific story,” you reply with butterflies in your stomach.

“What do you say? Would you like to go on a date with me?”

“I’ve been waiting for this for a long time,” you confess, taking a step forward.

“Really?”

“Really. And I have to admit when I didn’t see you again, I thought maybe I had scared you off because I was too clingy. I thought you were ignoring me.”

“I was ignoring you, but not for this reason,” Bucky admits, looking down for an instant. “I had a lot of things to handle and I didn’t know how to act around you. You made me feel normal and it scared me. It’s better now, I’m better now, though some days are still harder than others. I think I’m on the right path.”

“Do you feel ready to let me in your life now?” you ask, wanting to make sure it’s what he wants.

“I am, yes.”

“Then, we can meet Saturday afternoon at the café down the block. They have the best pastries in the neighbourhood.”

“Works for me,” Bucky confirms with a radiant grin. “In the meantime, do you have any book recommendations? I need something to talk to for a date I have at the end of the week.”

“I have just the novel you need.”

Marvel Masterlist

142 notes · View notes

heliads · 1 year ago

Note

I’d like to request a Pietro imagine. Pietro survived and became an Avenger. The female reader doesn’t have powers and isn’t an Avenger. She’s really smart and works with Tony and Bruce in the lab. She was hired after the whole Ultron fiasco. People underestimated her intelligence in high school and college because she’s a girly girl and loves the colour pink, but the Avengers aren’t like that. Pietro likes her and wants to date her.

'waiting around' - pietro maximoff

masterlist

When they tell Pietro he has to go to the labs, his first thought is to run.

He knows it’s silly. These are not the same doctors who made the Maximoff twins strong and fast and utterly alone in this world, these are the scientists with the Avengers. They’re the good guys. Apparently. But Pietro has learned fairly quickly that people calling themselves good aren’t always good in the end.

Pietro has a lot of learning to do since he and Wanda escaped Ultron a few months back. He’s doing his best to be patient and take things ‘one step at a time,’ as the Americans keep telling him. Mainly, he would like their steps to be faster. Pietro has things to do, and they don’t usually involve waiting in line for someone else to decide if he’s worthy of their loyalty or not. The Avengers are trying, he knows that. It’s just hard sometimes.

Especially when Pietro is still trying to shake off the feeling that he should have died back in Sokovia. He came away with his share of narrow escapes, but there was one moment towards the end, when the ships were firing at him, when Clint needed his help, that Pietro thought would be his last. Luckily, he was faster than a few bullets, but there’s still this nagging voice in the back of Pietro’s subconscious that whispers to him late at night: what if you hadn’t been fast enough?

So he’s been uneasy as of late. What about it? Stress is common in inhumans and Avengers, one glance around this coffee-dependent complex could tell him that. Still, it’s a good thing to get checked out. That’s part of the reason Pietro is being directed to the labs, along with a need for a good annual physical.

It sounds good, too, were it not for the fact that Pietro has had plenty of experience with laboratories in the past few years and none of it was good. The Hydra labs made him strong, in a sense, but they were torturous. He can still remember the pile of corpses ushered out every day, the experiments that failed. He remembers curling up in a corner of his cell, begging his body not to give out, not to make him another body in a bag. He lived, but he remembers.

This is not Hydra. Pietro knows that. He left them behind. Still, there will always be some part of him that shrinks away from every syringe, that distrusts every doctor who comes poking and prodding at the bizarre novelty that is an inhuman. That will never go away, no matter who’s side he’s on.

Still, the lab remains. He has to go in, the others will know if he doesn’t. At first, Pietro hesitates just outside the door, afraid to knock, afraid to listen. There was always a chill in the air throughout the Hydra complex, he remembers the gooseflesh forever on his skin. Signs that nothing good happened within the walls. Or maybe it was just because of the stone buildings in cold climates. Everything has an explanation.

He can’t back out now. Pietro grits his teeth and swings the door open in one broad movement. For a moment, he stands there, waiting to walk back into his old cell, his old life, and then he looks around and realizes with a grin that he’s going to be fine. This isn’t a Hydra ploy to get him back under their thumb. For one thing, Hydra never used this much pink. Just barren walls and gloomy, monstrous skull logos. In retrospect, that should have been a bad sign. Pietro has a problem with ignoring details, though, and it tends to get him in trouble.

These details, however, are quite difficult to be ignored. Everywhere Pietro looks, he sees pinpricks of pink– the handle of a pipette, labels on equipment, notebooks full of scrawled data points, hair ties in a carefully organized container. No, Hydra never had this much fun, and Pietro is starting to think that this is going to be very fun indeed.

Smirking to himself, Pietro weaves further through the lab. He sees a few assistants scurrying around in the back, but they pay him no mind so he does the same. Pietro almost reaches the end of the room when a sudden voice calls out to him: “Don’t take another step.”

Instantly, Pietro freezes. The owner of the voice walks towards him, a young woman about his age in a lab coat. She must be the owner of the lab, too, because he spots a pink tie in her hair matching the others near the door. The name stitched onto the left breast pocket of her lab coat reads Dr. Y/N L/N, so Pietro knows she’s the one he was supposed to find.

She points to Pietro’s feet, where he notices are just touching a line of caution tape on the ground. “If you went any further, you’d be at risk of getting your eyes blinded by the lasers,” she informs him cheerfully.

Pietro’s face drops. Only now does he notice the hazard signs. “Huh. Guess I wasn’t paying attention.”

Y/N arches a brow. “Do you always wander around lab space without watching where you’re going? Seems like an awfully dangerous habit for me.”

Pietro grins. “Well, I usually rely on my reflexes to get me out of trouble. I’m pretty quick.”

To prove it, he uses his speed to instantly move right behind the woman. She spins around, donning an indignant look that Pietro decides is very cute. “Don’t do that,” she scolds him.

Pietro folds his arms across his chest, grin broadening. “Why not?”

“I’ll tell Steve you’d like to do some weight training with him in the gym, and you think you can outlift him,” she threatens.

Pietro feigns surrender. “Anything but that, please.”

At last, Y/N’s lips twitch up into a smile. “That’s what I thought you’d say. Now, let’s focus. Tony sent you in to get a checkup, right?”

Pietro nods. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Wrong,” she tells him. “Tony actually sent you in here to get on my nerves. He does that a lot. I’m busy and he likes distracting me. We’re going to get through this as quickly as possible, alright?”

Pietro has to fight not to laugh. “And here I thought everyone in the labs gets along.”

Y/N rolls her eyes. “Most of the time, yes. Except when he sticks me with babysitting duty.”

“This isn’t babysitting,” Pietro protests, “I’m getting to know you. I already feel like we’re the best of friends.”

Something that might be a smile flits across Y/N’s face, but she takes great pains to hide it to him. Pietro, who has always cared a little too much about getting people to laugh at his jokes, follows her like a dog as she walks through her lab. “You can laugh, you know. It won’t kill you.”

The smile is gone as quickly as it appeared, and Pietro instantly wishes he hadn’t said a word. “I’m working right now,” she tells him abruptly. “That means I’m focused. Don’t get in my way.”

Surprised and somewhat hurt by her shift in mood, Pietro goes quiet, but he can’t resist asking a second later, “I’m not trying to interfere with your work, I promise. Does that often happen?”

Y/N goes still. Pietro is half expecting her to just ignore him when she finally speaks at last, very quiet and very unlike the fiery personality he’d seen before. “Every time someone new comes in here. And with half the people I’ve already met, anyway. You’d be surprised what a few pink accessories can do to someone’s reputation, and their credibility in a lab.”

Pietro grimaces. “I’m sorry about that, honest. That’s not what I was going for, by the way. I joke with everyone.”

At last, Y/N meets his eyes. There’s a faint tint of humor swimming in her gaze. “I think I got that.”

She’s smiling, though, so he takes that as a good sign. Once that initial barrier was crossed, Y/N opens up a little more, and then Pietro finds himself stopping by her lab almost every day when he’s not off on a mission. He sees her thrilled with success after an experiment worked, and desolate when they don’t. He sees her consumed with stress. He sees her brow knit with careful concern as she patches him up after a mission. Through all of it, Pietro is increasingly risky with his heart, and then one day, he knows he loves her.

It’s a foolish thing to do. Y/N has confided in him many times that she’s afraid people only will see her as a girl first and a researcher second, someone who can be taken out for drinks but never a valid source of knowledge. If he makes his move now, she’ll never forgive him for being just like the others.

So he doesn’t say a thing, and descends further and further into hopelessness. Wanda says he’s ridiculously obvious, but Y/N still doesn’t seem to have noticed a thing, so maybe the only person more oblivious than Pietro is Y/N, and that’s saying something. Pietro doesn’t want to ruin their friendship, but as the days slip by and Pietro only falls more in love with her, he wonders if he hasn’t already ruined it by always wanting more than he can have.

He’s starting to wonder if he is simply going to carry this secret with him forever, until Y/N catches him at it one evening. The night is growing late, and Pietro has retreated to one of his favorite hiding places in the Avengers complex, Y/N’s lab, to watch her conduct her experiments and indulge in some idle chatter. They’ve grown quiet, and Pietro is leaning against a benchtop, doing nothing but watch her. Some of the motion-sensor lights in the corners of the lab have gone off from inactivity, giving the lights above them an extra glow. The light plays upon Y/N’s face and makes her eyes shine.

Pietro is just thinking that he’s never seen someone more beautiful in his entire life when Y/N looks up and catches him in the act. Instantly, Pietro pretends as if he’d simply been watching her pipette some samples into the well plates in front of her, but her brow is already furrowing and she’s asking him what’s wrong.

Pietro shrugs elaborately. “Nothing, nothing. Just thinking.”

“Really?” She asks, grinning slightly. “I didn’t think that was a normal thing to you.”

Pietro rolls his eyes. “Very funny.”

“I thought so,” Y/N hums. “What were you thinking about? You seemed very preoccupied.”

“Nothing,” Pietro repeats, but Y/N doesn’t seem convinced.

“Come on, I didn’t think we were the type to keep secrets from each other. What are you trying to hide?” Y/N asks.

Pietro scratches the back of his head, suddenly awkward. “It’s embarrassing.”

“Even better,” she says, laughing slightly. “What is it?”

Pietro should stay silent, but he can feel the secret rising up his lungs and forcing itself out before he gets the chance. “I’m in love with you,” he blurts out.

Y/N’s eyes widen. Whatever she was expecting him to say, it obviously wasn’t that. “Oh,” she says quietly.

“Yeah,” Pietro says, wanting to stab himself in the eye with a nearby multitool. “Oh.”

He eyes the door, and has just decided that a strategic retreat is the best move when Y/N interjects, “I love you too, you know.”

Pietro turns around so hastily that he almost upsets a nearby rack of micropipettes. “What? You do?”

She’s glancing at her work, but he can tell that she’s embarrassed. “Yeah. Thought you knew.”

“Obviously I didn’t, or I would have done something about it,” Pietro blurts out.

Y/N glances up again, smiling again. “Like what?”

“Like take you out on a date,” Pietro returns. “How about it? This Friday. Seven. I’ll pick you up.”

Y/N laughs. “That sounds good to me.”

It sounds good to Pietro, too. When he leaves Y/N’s lab at the end of the day, he’s practically giddy. All this time, he was afraid of telling her, and now he’s wishing he spilled his guts much earlier. Regardless, he has what he wants. They’ll have their date, and Pietro is going to feel like he’s on top of the world.

requested by @thornyrose463, i hope you enjoy!

marvel tag list: @mayfieldss, @blondsauduun, @mycosmicparadise, @ellobruv, @callsign-scully, @with-inked-solace, @sher-lokid7, @eclliipsed, @23victoria, @watchreadfangirlrepeat, @gods-fools-heroes, @w1shes43, @deafsuperhero, @fadedver, @alex-1967s-blog, @crazyhearttragedy, @faerieroyal

all tags list: @wordsarelife

458 notes · View notes

buckyswifeduh · 1 year ago

Text

Red agony

Pairings- Boyfriend!Bucky x Fem!Reader

Summary- Your time of the month has come back around, leaving you in agony. Bucky comes home from a mission, takes care of you, and comforts you.

Warnings- period talk, hurt/comfort, worried Bucky, talk of menstrual cycle, talk of tampons, I think that's it!

WC- 1.1k

masterlist

That time of the month was rearing its ugly head once again.

You held your stomach in pain as your heating pad soothed a small amount of the aching in your back.

Tears were crusted on your cheeks as your face was flushed. All of the lights in the bedroom were off, the only illumination being an open sign from the Chinese place across the street.

Bucky turned the keys in the door, swinging it open and toeing his shoes off under the coat rack. "Doll?"

He eyed the room, noticing the lack of any lamps or lights on. Tossing his bag on the ground, he made his way down the hall.

His socked feet making a soft noise of footsteps, making you finally snap out of the trance you had been in.

"Bucky?" You mumbled, looking back at the doorway behind you, seeing your boyfriend's silhouette.

"Hey, sweetheart," Bucky smiled, immediately noticing your hunched-over position, heating pad, and pain pills on the nightstand.

You pushed yourself into a sitting position, groaning as your back bent uncomfortably, "How was the mission, honey?"

Bucky saw you trying to get up and pushed you back down onto the bed, pulling you into his chest. You gripped onto his shirt, slinking your leg in between his.

"It was good, doll. No injuries. Got the intel we needed." He nodded, "Everything went well." You smiled into his chest, "Good, that's good."

"What about you, honey?" Bucky rubbed your back with his flesh arm, putting pressure on the aching part of your back.

"It was alright, I guess." You shrugged, making Bucky tilt your head up with his metal hand on your chin. "How was it really?"

Suddenly the dam broke. Tears streamed down your face as you buried your face into his neck, "It was horrible, Buck."

He shushed you, rubbing your back and encircling you in his arms. "I'm so sorry, honey. I would've come home sooner if I could."

You shook your head, inhaling his vanilla and musk scent. "You had a job to do, Buck. That doesn't stop just because I started my period and had a bad day." Bucky placed his metal hand on your cheek again, rubbing under your eyes which felt amazing on your flushed, hot skin.

"How about I run you a hot bath and make you some food, huh?" You looked up at him, your eyes only producing more tears as you nodded. "Yes, please."

"Okay, honey." He helped you stand and walk to the bathroom, sitting you down on the toilet seat as he ran the bath.

He poured epson salt in the bottom of the tub, checking the water temp, and making sure it wasn't too hot before plugging the bottom of the drain.

Bucky bent over, pressing a soft kiss to the crown of your head, moving your hair out of your face before helping you undress and place your dirty clothes in the hamper.

You watched him, admiring how much he cared about you, and how tenderly he took care of you. He poured your favorite bubbles in the bath, making sure to test the water before helping you step in and settle.

You felt immediate relief in your back from the warmth, sighing and closing your eyes.

"I'll put some pajamas on the bed for you, doll." You smiled softly, pulling him down to place a kiss on his lips. "Thank you, Buck. I love you." "I love you, yell if you need me, sweetheart."

Closing the bathroom door, he turned on the bedroom light, immediately noticing the large red stain on your side of the covers. He sighed, wishing he didn't have to go on that mission and could've been here with you, taking care of you instead.

He gathered the sheets and covers, placing them in the wash before putting clean black sheets on the bed.

Moving to the kitchen, he started to make your favorite comfort food. Grilled cheese with soup and hot chocolate.

A while passed, the water had become room temperature and the bubbles had soaked in with the water; creating a shimmery film on the top of the water.

"Food is ready, doll." You heard Bucky as he popped his head inside the door, making you pull yourself from the bath. You changed your tampon, drying yourself off, and wrapping a towel around your body.

Your hair was still wet as it dripped onto your shoulders and onto the floor. You saw the clothes Bucky had put out. Excited, as it was a pair of his sweatpants and his red henley.

You pulled on the sweats, feeling the fleece lining against your skin. You had to fold the lining of his pants twice, just so the bottoms wouldn't swallow your ankles.

Slipping the red henley over your head, foregoing a bra, you opened the bedroom door and were immediately hit with the scent of your favorite food.

"Thank you, Buck." You smiled, wrapping your arms around him from behind, your face pressed tightly to the center of his back.

"Of course, doll." He placed his metal hand over yours, swaying you both back and forth as he dished the soup into a bowl, and placed the grilled cheese on a plate.

You unwrapped yourself from him, attempting to take the plate, but he moved it away before you could, gesturing to the couch. "Nu-uh. Go relax, I'll bring it to you." Wrapping your hand around the back of his neck, you pulled his lips down to yours, feeling him squeeze your waist. "You're too good to me, Buck." He shook his head, "I think it's the other way around, honey." You laughed, walking over to the couch, placing a dark blue blanket over your legs.

"Eat up." Bucky put a pillow on your lap, sitting down the food.

He turned on the tv, playing your favorite show as you slowly ate for the first time that day.

Once you had finished, Bucky moved the plate and bowl to the coffee table, pulling you into his arms, making sure you could still see the tv.

Your head was in his lap as you looked up at him, ignoring your show. He felt eyes on him, looking down at you. "Everything okay, doll?" A wide smile graced your lips as you nodded. "I just love you so much, James." You kissed the side of his hand, "Thank you for taking care of me." Bucky smiled back, his hand on your cheek, softly rubbing circles. "I love you, honey. More than anything."

______________

masterlist

bucky masterlist

358 notes · View notes

manestjerne · 1 year ago

Text

I'll do that again for you

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female reader

Summary: Bucky pushes you away again and you let him this time.

Word count: 3k

Warnings: angst, swearing, comfort, a little fluff, doubts, angry behavior, mentions of physical abuse and injuries, crying. Let me know if I forgot something.

A/N: I'm not sure about this one, but it's been on my mind for so long I had to finally sit down and write it all down. Hope you enjoy it guys <3

I walked into Bucky’s apartment and tossed my keys on the dining table before opening the fridge and getting myself a bottle of water. I looked around slowly and walked to the pile of bedsheets on the floor. I picked them up before sitting down on the couch. The quiet sound of shower in the other room seemed to wash all my worries away, but I knew they will come back the moment I see him. His deep blue, tired eyes full of regret and and guilt, his usually steady hands shaking whenever we were alone. All the things no one else besides me was allowed to see. Things that only I could perceive in a conference room full of people. Things I couldn’t do anything about. He was more devastated than ever, when Steve started talking about leaving him. Leaving us, but Bucky couldn’t wrap his head around that, believing I have already found my peace in other people. As compassionate as he was, he never saw how lonely I was since I was trying to get him his life back. But I never blamed him.

The peaceful sound of water flowing got quiet unexpectedly, making me snap back to reality. I heard quiet footsteps getting closer and my heart started pounding in my chest.

„Hey sweets, you’re here early.”

He said calmly, sitting on the couch next to me. I only replied with a smile, realizing he looks worse than usually. He wasn’t surprised I was here, I always were on friday mornings. We talked about his last therapy session before going to the compound together, it was our routine. The thing that kept us both on tracks, helping to get a steady rhythm in our messed up lives, something to stick with for once. But today my thoughts were focused on something else, I didn’t care about the therapy, knowing he might finally found something better to help him get his life together.

„How was your date yesterday?”

„It was awful and I don’t want to talk about it.”

His reply was dry and harsh. He didn’t do that often while talking to me. He had a soft spot there, always treating me gently and respectful, but I knew this moment would come, sooner or later. I knew the perfect bubble of our strange relationship would finally burst, because he couldn’t handle it. I knew it would change for him, but never for me, I felt the same way since I met him, when he squeezed my throat so hard that I passed out and had to look at the bruises covering my body for the next two weeks, whenever I passed a mirror. But even as the Winter Soldier, his eyes were the same, that’s why I chose to help Steve get him back. That’s why I had the worst possible fight with Tony, when he told me I can’t just pick up assassins from the streets and adopt them like stray cats. He never said that about Wanda, he never called Nat an assassin, but he never hesitated when it came to Bucky. Thinking about that sent shivers down my spine, remembering how much I had to give up to bring things back to normal, to help them understand, that the Winter Soldier is not the person standing in front of them.

„So I chose a wrong person again?”

I asked with a weak smile. It wasn’t the first date he didn’t enjoy, but he never blamed me for that.

„You chose the wrong thing for me, I don’t get why do you want me to find a fucking love of my life by setting me up on hookups I don’t want to attend.”

His voice started to sound unsettling, I shifted in my seat and straightened my back, looking at him carefully. He tried to do that earlier, to push me away by scaring me, but I never let him. I knew he would never hurt me, too focused on protecting me at all costs, like his life depended on it.

„Don’t be such a dick and stop blaming me for your poor love life, I’m just trying to help you get back to reality.”

I was surprised by my own words, I never spoke to him that way, no matter how he treated me. I felt a wave of frustration flushing through my veins, making me feel like my blood is boiling. I looked at his hands, his metal fingers clenching in a fist, the flesh hand rubbing on the soft fabric of his jeans, but I knew how much they were trembling at this moment and how much he was fighting himself not to break the character he was trying to play.

„I never asked for it.”

His jaw clenched and I felt a sting in my chest at his words. No matter how grateful he was for me being there, he would never admit it, he would never say how much he needed and appreciated all I ever did for him.

„Do you want me to leave?”

I decided to make it easier for him, knowing he would struggle with saying it out loud. He never wanted me to leave his side, but he thought it was the right thing, and I couldn’t fight it anymore.

„I don’t want you to play a babysitter anymore, seeing one shrink at a time is enough.”

He huffed and rolled his eyes, almost making me believe his words and for the first time I felt some kind of doubt. My safe place by his side was slowly fading away as he kept looking at me with something what felt like blame in his eyes. I shrinked into my seat trying to find any words, but every time I opened my mouth the room was filled with nothing but silence.

„Do you want me to leave?”

I repeated myself quietly, not able to find any other words suitable for what I was feeling at the moment.

„Are you even fucking listening?”

He wasn’t angry, but frustrated. I didn’t flinch at his voice, but I could feel the tears filling up my eyes slowly. I got up and picked my keys up from the table. After a few short breaths I found the courage to face him again.

„That’s what I do all the time, James. I listen. I wish you could do that for once.”

With my last word I turned away and walked to the door. He never tried to stop me, he didn’t say anything before I left. I held my tears back for as long as I could, letting go at the moment I sat in my car. I doubted all I did for him at the moment, knowing that one of us wasn’t ready for what we were doing, but I couldn’t realize who was the problem.

-----

„It’s been a week since you stopped attending the meetings. If Tony was mad earlier, you don’t want to know what Steve said today.”

Nat entered my room without knocking as always. She brought me a piece of Wanda’s cake, but I pushed the plate away, still refusing to eat whenever I wasn’t starving.

„I really just don’t want to see him, I’m not ready for that.”

She sat on the bed next to me, looking at me closely and sinking every word I said. It was the first time I said anything about what happened that day and she was willing to listen carefully to every word I say, analyzing every sigh and deep breath between them. I felt bad about treating her this way, she deserved to know everything, but I was scared of what I was going to say, I tried not to think about it, knowing my pain is now fully replaced with anger and frustration.

„I did everything I could, all this months I tried to help him and he acts like a fucking brat, trying to push me away. I’m so done with him, I’m not going back and begging him to let me do that all again. If he’s so devoted to Steve let’s just stick with that and let him live his pathetic little life without my interruptions.”

I said it all in one breath trying not to sound paranoid, but Nat only nodded slowly and laid on her back, staring at the perfectly white ceiling.

„I respect your every decision, but he’s only doing that to help you, and you know that. It’s you, who convinced me he means no harm and just can’t deal with his own mind, that’s why he’s trying to push you away. But it’s okay you’re tired with that, you don’t deserve it.”

I rolled on my stomach laying next to her and picked up the plate she put on the bed earlier. I stared at all the layers of my favorite toppings and saw how uneven it was looking, realizing Natasha helped Wanda with cooking this time. I smiled to myself remembering how much she hates doing that.

"Just wait for him to come back, he'll do it eventually."

„Thanks Nat, I’m glad you’re here.”

I said before dipping my fork in the cake.

---

Everyone got quiet when I entered the shared kitchen, it was the first time I was in the same room with Bucky since I left his apartment in tears. But I didn’t mind his presence, I knew he’s not going to bring it up when there were so many people around and I wasn’t planning on giving him a chance to speak to me in private. I walked up to the counter and poured myself a glass of water before heading to the coffee machine. I waited for my drink to brew when I turned away and rested my elbows on the counter behind me, almost tasting the tensed atmosphere I brought into the room.

„Are you planning on attending any meetings this week or should I just send you a fax with our arrangements?”

Tony asked calmly. He was mad at me, but acting as a human as possible he wasn’t planning on letting me know.

„Yeah, I’ll be there today.”

I shrugged my shoulders when Steve rolled his eyes, but I wasn’t looking at him. Bucky’s eyes were glued to the countertop in front of him, filled with guilt. He looked pathetic and I blamed myself for enjoying the view. After hearing a quiet beep my eyes left him to pick up the coffee.

„See you at 6.”

I said and started walking away lazily with mug in one hand and a glass of water in another. I was slowly getting used to this, feeling more comfortable leaving my room, not caring about the stares.

„You two should just fuck and let us get back to normal.”

I froze at Tony’s words and turned back to face him unconsciously.

„Come on, we can all see how you’re looking at each other, let’s finally get over this awkward phase.”

„Shut up.”

Bucky replied him firmly at his next words, but Tony just shrugged his shoulders and went back to eating his cereal. I tightened my grip on the glass in my hand and looked him in the eyes, shaking my head slowly. Little did he know, we did that once, a few weeks back and it never helped, it never changed our relationship. I couldn’t find proper words to respond so I just walked away and stopped after passing the first corner, when no one could see me. I let my head fall back and took a few deep breaths, feeling the almost healed wound open up again. I started walking away when I heard footsteps approaching me, but he was faster and caught up with me after only a few seconds. He blocked my way with his body, towering over me before I could reach the elevator and hide in my room.

„He shouldn’t have said that, I’m sorry.”

Bucky was trying to look me in the eyes but I successfully avoided it.

„Don’t act like you regret anything.”

I huffed and tried to pass him, but it was impossible. He raised his hand to tuck the strand of hair behind my ear but I flinched at his movement. He was visibly hurt by that, but not surprised, taking a step back his gaze never left me.

„Can we just talk like adult people do?”

„You’re not so good at that.”

I replied coldly, matching his earlier energy, trying to push him away as he did so many times.

„I am, you taught me that.”

„No, that’s a job for a shrink, so I’m not doing that again.”

„I know how you fee-„

„No, you fucking don’t!”

I replied throwing a glass at him, my words louder than necessary. He didn’t flinch, knowing I wasn’t actually aiming at him. The glass flew next to his face and shattered at the wall behind him.

„Fuck.”

I mumbled and dropped on my knees to pick up the glass from the floor. He kneeled besides me and pulled me away gently, grabbing the shattered pieces with his metal hand.

„You’ll hurt yourself.”

He said gently and I almost fell in his arms after these words, knowing how much I miss him and how much I want to be allowed to do that again.

„Like you care.”

I huffed in response and entered the elevator leaving him alone, kneeling in the puddle wetting his jeans, letting my frustration take over.

-----

I heard a soft knocking on my door. I raised myself on my elbows before realizing Nat and Wanda never knock, no matter what time they decide to come see me, so I rolled over with my back facing the door now. I didn’t want to talk to anybody else at the moment.

„I know you’re not sleeping, I can hear your uneven breath.”

I heard the words clearly, even tho his whisper was muffled by the door separating us. I didn’t respond, knowing he’ll come in eventually. I heard a resigned sigh before the door opened. His quiet footsteps echoing in my head when he circled the room and kneeled besides my bed to face me.

„I’m sorry for being such a dick.”

He said confidently waiting for my answer, but also knowing I’m not going to speak. He gave me a few seconds to make sure I don’t have anything to say before he spoke up again.

„I know how you feel, I can see how much you have to give up in order to help me. I know how alone you are, even with so many people supporting you. I know you did it all to make me feel better and I appreciate it more than anything, I need your help just as much as you think and more.”

I was a little confused at his words, actually admitting all the things he couldn’t say earlier.

„Then why are you like that?”

I felt the tears filling up my eyes again, but I didn’t care, letting them fall on my cheeks as our murmurs were filling up the quiet room.

„Because I can’t stand watching you do this. You don’t deserve it, I don’t deserve you, but I can’t function without you. I need you back and I’ll do everything for you to forgive me again.”

His hand slowly landed on my cheek, wiping the tears away as he looked me in the eyes.

„See, that’s the problem. Again. How many times will you push me away before finally opening up and letting me really help you?”

My voice wasn’t shaking as much, feeling his touch calmed me down as always, no matter how I wanted to resist the feeling.

„I won’t do that ever again, I won’t hurt you. I just need you back, as clingy as always, being a pain in my ass every Friday morning, asking about my therapy. Making me watch all the stupid romantic movies, cuddling on the couch when I’m trying to move away. Dragging me back to bed when I lay on the floor and making me talk about my nightmares before we fall asleep again.”

"Who would think that Bucky Barnes could ever kneel before a woman."

"And I'll do it again for you."

I couldn’t help but giggled at his words, knowing how much I miss that feeling too, no matter he was trying to act like he hates it, he loved it more than I did. He smiled softly at my reaction, and I knew it was sincere. He slowly stood up and took the covers off me. Picking me up gently he moved me to make space for himself and laid next to me, resting my head on his chest before pulling the covers over us once more.

„Just come back for the last time and I promise I won’t act like a brat and start treating you as you deserve. I would do anything for you and I can’t run from it anymore. I’m ready to give you everything I can and finally take care of you, like you did this whole time.”

He brushed his fingers through my hair and I nodded slowly, knowing he finally understood that pushing me away is not an option. I took a deep breath smelling his cologne and my eyelids got heavy as my body started to relax. I closed my eyes sinking in the feeling of our bodies being so close again, our legs tangled under the duvet, his heart beating right where my head was resting.

„Just close your eyes now, and we’ll start everything again tomorrow, okay?”

He asked quietly, his flesh hand not leaving my hair and the metal one still drawing circles on my back.

„Okay.”

I said before falling asleep, knowing I won’t wake up in the middle of the night as I did every single time for the past week.

273 notes · View notes

jackiequick · 4 months ago

Text

—This Is The Place I Feel At Home… | Marvel AU

Pairing: Jason & Elizabeth

Additional Cast: Tony, Liane and Louis

—

Summary: A home isn’t the place, it’s the people in your life that who help build the home together

———

Note: This is Earth 82. Jason and Elizabeth nicknames are JJ & Liz

Inspired: A certain show on NBC if you know, you know ;) and the song To Build a Home by Cinematic Orchestra

Fic Type: Fluff & Angst

———

Superbowl Sunday.

Usually a StarkWood event with tables and chairs all lined up, participants will run through the entire house playing. Family members and friends going out or staying in to enjoy a day off.

But this year was different. The kids were older and no one was around to enjoy the night like they used to. Louis went out to the mountains for a party with his girlfriend Laurel, Liane was busy shopping with her friend Petra along and Tony decided to head out to a party with Rhodes.

So that left Jason and Lizzie all alone to spend the evening together. It felt like an empty nest, but it wasn’t so bad. Sitting on the couch, eating chips and drinking as much as possible while watching television. The two even pushed the coffee table off to the side, making room for the two of them.

“A dance, m’lady?” Jason teased, extending his hand as he grinned.

Elizabeth chuckled, taking his hand, “Why certainly, good sir.”

The two danced together and laughed, looking around as they played around with the idea of extending their home. Building a bigger house to remodel together or buying a new one to renovate for a forever home they stay in when they’re old and grey, with great value.

A new production for this family.

“How about we take this talk upstairs?” Elizabeth teased in a suggestive tone and smirked, “The kids will come back later.”

“Mrs. Starkwood, how naughty!” Jason teased back as he smirked, lifting her up into an embrace hearing his wife’s squeals, “I love the way you think.”

There was laughter and chatter all the way through the bedroom floor…

——

Hours passed, the kids returned home, except for Louis who stayed over at Laurel’s house that night. Liane went to help their mother with fixing up the living room and put away any food that was left out. Tony decided to take a few minutes to clean up the kitchen with their father, making sure to throw away anything that might need to be thrown out.

Music softly played in the background as background noise as they all quietly talked and sang along to the sound coming from the radio. Liane was the first person to go upstairs, not with a kiss on the forehead from both parents and Tony soon followed after, turning off the items in the kitchen before he did. The still new dog, Bailey, went running downstairs to the living room to sleep. Elizabeth asked if her husband was coming up upstairs as Jason replied he’ll be there in a minute.

Jason took that time to tidy around the living room, write a note to Louis that was pinned near the entrance, turn off a few lights and then headed to bed.

Soon enough, the house was sound asleep with not even a single word was made out in the halls. Suddenly, an ever so quiet ticking sound appeared in the air, a switch downstairs in the kitchen flipped on.

The soft crumble of fresh flames crawled up the fabric and began to rise into the curtains within the kitchen, then slowly disappeared as it toppled onto the walls filled with memories and reminders…

———

————

A smell of smoke and burnt flesh wood filled his senses as Jason sat upright. He yawned and fumbled quietly toward the door, but as he opened the bedroom door he was greeted with brightly painted orange flames.

He slammed the door shut as he said, “Lizzie! I need you to wake, baby, the house is on fire. Get dressed and put some shoes on!”

Lizzie woke up to the sound of her husband's voice and gasped, “What?”

Jason opened the door to call out to the kids, “Kids! The house is on fire, Tony! Lia!” He heard their voice and the sound of Liane’s screams as she swung opened her door, “Guys, close your doors! I’m coming to get you!”

Jason closed the door rushing to put on his sneakers and a sweater, exclaiming how he’s going downstairs for Louis in a panic. Elizabeth was putting her hair in a quick bun as she told him that Louis is not here, he stayed at Laurel’s house, as he nodded in response. Elizabeth rushed to the bathroom to wet any towel, and started removing the bedsheets from their bed. She watched in horror and panic as Jason rushed out the bedroom door towards Tony’s room.

He crawled and grabbed the door open, only to see Tony hyperventilating and coughing. His eyes were wide open as he tugged on his shoes, before meeting his father’s eyes.

“No, I’m not going out there! I’ll climb out my window or something!” Tony shouted, shaking his head, as his father pulled him down to the ground and he breathed deeply.

“Tony, buddy, there’s no time, come on!” Jason shouted, coughing as he led his son towards the room, watching Tony scurry into the bedroom floor.

Jason shouted, “Princess! I’m coming back for you!” As he shut the door coughing loudly, looking over to see Elizabeth going to open the window. He watched his wife breathing heavily as she coughed.

Elizabeth put the towel under the door and rushed to open the window taking in the cold brick air looking over her shoulder, “Darling hurry up!”

“I’m trying!” Jason shouted before turning to Tony with a firm expression and sighed, “If I’m not back in 3 minutes, you take your mother out that window.”

Tony nods frantically, “And if she doesn’t?”

“If she won’t go, you drag her out.”

“Wait don’t…”

“You’ll be fine.”

——

When Jason rushed out again, this time to find Liane, he was meant by a different type of expression. Screams and cries coming from his daughter, as he shut the door behind her.

He cupped her cheek, “Hey, hey, look at me. We gotta go.”

“It wasn’t my fire! I didn’t cause it!” Liane screamed between her cries as he wrapped a wet towel over her.

“I know you didn’t but baby we gotta go.”

“I don’t wanna!”

But he ignored her cries of refusal as he breathed out looking around frantically for an opportunity for assistance. Elizabeth and Tony’s screams were heard from the bedroom, threats from Lizzie that she’d come in there to get them, if they didn't respond back soon. Jason took the mattress off the bed as Liane screamed wondering what was his logic, but the answer soon came.

The door was open as they were meant once again with bright orange flames as the mattress was used as a shield against the fire, allowing for them to escape the bedroom and into the main bedroom. Tony slammed the door shut once they came as he screamed at how incredibly insane this situation was.

———

Cough, shouting and crying was heard from the whole family as they escaped through the window then stood on the roof. Elizabeth’s eyes were filled with fear seeing the danger and damage they were inflicted upon. She helped Jason finish tying the sheets together to create a rope, as they lowered Tony down first onto the ground as next went Liane who appeared just as frantic as her brother.

“Shit. I think Bailey’s still in the house…” Tony suddenly shouted as Liane’s realization hit her as well, wiping sweat off his face.

“What?! No, no, no!” Liane yelled looking around as if she could see the dog across the flames and held her brother close.

Jason caught his wife’s attention as he wrapped the sheets under her armpits secured with her grip holding on firmly. He looked at her in disbelief and panicking, his eyes filled with the same intensity as she held.

“I love you.” He said slowly lowering her down towards the ground where the kids stood.

“I love you more.” She breathed deeply as she replied watchung him slowly disappearing from her gaze as she was lowered.

Jason sighed in relief seeing his wife and kids down on the grass, as Elizabeth tugs their children to step away from the engulfing flames that were screaming from every window to crawl out even further. Jason takes a slight breath, coughing even harder than before and hisses in pain, not fully aware of the burns that appeared on his hands and forearms yet.

“Bailey is still in there!” Liane suddenly yelled once more.

Jason looked between the house and his family frantically as he yelled, “Forget the dog! I’ll buy you a new one!”

“No! Bailey!”

“I don’t hear him!”

Liane huffed and coughed even further, ready to race though the front door to grab said dog but Tony drags her back by the waist shouting how the dog’s not worth it. Tony’s voice was clear as day, trying to be the voice of reason here. Jason was breathing heavily through his mouth as his gaze fell upon the house in flames and his family.

But before he could say another word or turn around to climb back inside, Elizabeth’s firm screams through all the tension as she glared daggers at his direction.

“JJ! Jason! If you go back inside, I swear I'll drag you out myself!” Elizabeth screamed, coughing with a pointed finger straight at him.

Lizzie knew that if she didn’t catch his attention and made that harsh threat, he would’ve risked his life to save that fairly new dog and a couple of items within the house. She hated the words that escaped her lips, but she wasn’t blind to the dangers that were in front of her and the even bigger ones that would happen if he returned though their bedroom window. Furthermore, she could see the moment of doubt across her husband’s face, to know he was at a crossroads here.

Without a second later, Jason made a swift move as he climbed down the sheets that were created to make a rope and stepped onto the grass. He stumbled backwards, as Elizabeth held him upwards as her gaze was fixed between her husband, children and their home that was up in flames.

Tony held his sister close as she tried to fight back, but her tears stopped her as she screamed. Liane flopped into her brother’s arms sadly as her word quieted down and her gaze fell onto the house. Tony exhaled looking around watching their home, a pang of sadness filled in his chest as he sucked in a breath and sniffled. His own eyes were wet, leaning against his mother.

Elizabeth and Jason felt dizzy at the sight, coughing and gasping for air. The sounds of firetrucks and shouts could be heard from a distance that grew closer by the seconds, along with the screaming colors of police cars driving up the street. The cries from an ambulance appeared within grasp, as Jason rested his head next to his wife as she wrapped her arms around his waist. He tugs Tony and Liane forward into the embrace that was already formed from the one he created with Elizabeth.

———

————

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Extra notes to talk about in this AU

Bailey is fine don’t worry!!

Liz & JJ took Tony, Louis and Liane in when they were practically babies cuz they’re parents couldn’t afford them etc (or maybe one of them is biologically their own and they adopted the other two?? We discuss this later!!)

This fire sadly happened but it gave the whole family an opportunity to get a better view of the world as they live somewhere better, expanding their horizons and creating new memories while still keeping the old ones alive

The fire and the fact that the family stayed together ALIVE, showcase a huge view for Liane and Tony, who will grow up to become Superheroes influence them to fight for what matters most.

We can discuss this more later 😉

~~~~~~~~

Anyways that’s all folks I hope you enjoy it! Let me know what you think in the comments below 👇🏼

Remember to like, comment and share your thoughts 💭

Tags: @gaminggirlsstuff f @gcthvile @missstrawbs2001 @djs8891 @starkleila @aidanxsophxoxo @mandylove1000 @yetanotherwells @topgun-imagines @buckysteveloki-me @sherloquestea @ximehs @savemewattpad @rose-of-oz @rowinablacks-moodboardsandstims @rickb-chaos @capsshinyshield @blueboirick @wickedocs @rowinablx

24 notes · View notes

somethingeden · 2 years ago

Text

The Hurtful Truth

Summary: Y/n is fed up with trying to make her lover, Bucky, remember her. So, after a failed mission he goes to check on her and confronts her on her behaviour.

Warnings: Swearing, un-detailed violence??

Word count: 380 words (sorry I will do more words in the future).

★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

The mission was going horrible. It was supposed to be simple, get in and get out with the captives. But no, you just had to fuck it up. You just had to trip over a wire that was where you were hiding. You just had to get bloody caught. Because of that, all the captives were killed on the spot as it turns out, they were just bait.

“Y/n! on your left!” Your brother, Steve yells as you kick a HYDRA Agent away. You turn sharply around to face the so-called agent that your brother called to you but then you get flung across the grass field towards a tree. Your back erupts in pain as your back hits the tree, so you find yourself crumbled on the ground. You can only hear ringing in your ears as you groan.

Tears stream down your cheeks as you slowly heave yourself off the ground. Stumbling forward you soon collapse back onto the ground. The last thing you witness is Wanda sprinting towards you while her lips move but all you hear is still the ringing of a bell, before your eyes flutter close into darkness.

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔

Your eyes slowly but gradually open but you find your lips curl up into a scowl as the lights blind you. Wincing as you turn your eyes to the right you find your brother impatiently seated on a chair. “Y/n. You are awake”, Steve grins.

Your head tilts to the side as you find a man standing at the doorway. “Jamie?” Your throat croaks out as it demands for rest.

“Hello doll” Bucky answers and pushes off the wall to her side. He glances at her blonde brother and nods slightly. Steve then plants his lips on my forehead before walking out of the room. “Doll, what happened?”

“What do you mean? Do you mean the mission?” You flinch as you recount the memories of it. “So many people…. So many people lost their lives… because I fucked up”

“What happened, happened. You didn’t fuck it up okay. I was not asking about the mission.. but your behaviour since we have met. It’s like you know something and are avoiding me!” He softly furrows his brows in frustration and his eyes bore into yours.

#mcu #marvel #marvel cinematic universe #bucky barnes #james barnes #james buchanan barnes #james bucky barnes #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky x reader #bucky x you #winter solider x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes x reader #bucky one shot #bucky barnes oneshot #mcu oneshot #somethingeden

142 notes · View notes

ericshoney · 1 month ago

Text

Stark's Wit~ Tony Stark

Summary: You're not the best at hand-to-hand combat, but your the second best Stark with sarcastic responses.

Warnings: Platonic nicknames, possible swearing, sarcastic humour.

Reader's Age: 18

The biting wind whipped around Y/n as she stood on the training platform, a scowl etched on her face. Sparring with super soldiers in January was not her idea of a fun Friday afternoon. Especially when all she had to defend herself was the Stark family arsenal of sarcasm.

“Alright, kid, you ready?” Steve, radiating earnest encouragement, adjusted his gloves. Beside him, Bucky simply stared, his metal arm gleaming dully in the overcast light. Sam hovered behind them, a wry grin on his face. He knew how this usually went.

"Born ready, Captain Rogers," Y/n quipped, her voice dripping with irony. "Just try not to break anything too important. Dad would have a conniption if his precious lab assistant came back in pieces."

Steve winced. He still wasn't entirely used to Y/n's… bluntness. "We'll be careful, Y/n. This is just for practice."

"Practice for what? The Super Soldier Olympics?" She rolled her eyes. "Last time I checked, my skill set leaned more towards coding and caffeine addiction, not hand-to-hand combat."

Bucky finally spoke, his voice gruff. "Everyone needs to know how to defend themselves, Stark. Especially with your… family history."

That hit a little too close to home. Y/n tightened her jaw. "Right, because I specifically asked to be born into a world of interdimensional travel, rogue AI, and sentient purple grapefruits. My bad."

Steve sighed and stepped forward. "Alright, enough talking. Let's see what you've got."

The next few minutes were, to put it mildly, humiliating. Steve, ever the gentleman, pulled his punches, but even he couldn't help but land a few glancing blows. Bucky, predictably, was less restrained. His metal arm was like a battering ram, and Y/n found herself mostly dodging and weaving, her reflexes surprisingly sharp despite her lack of formal training.

"Having fun yet?" Sam called out, leaning against the railing.

"Oh, I'm having a ball, Sam," Y/n gasped, narrowly avoiding Bucky's fist. "This is exactly how I pictured spending my Friday: getting pummeled by a century-old assassin. Living the dream, really."

She managed to duck under Steve’s arm and deliver a swift kick to his shin. It wasn’t exactly a knockout blow, but it was enough to make him stumble.

"Not bad, Y/n," Steve said, rubbing his leg. "You're getting faster."

"Years of dodging Dad's bad science puns have honed my reflexes," she retorted, then spun to face Bucky, who was advancing with a predatory gleam in his eye. "Alright, Tin Man, let's dance!"

Bucky lunged. This time, Y/n tried a different tactic. As he swung his metal arm, she sidestepped and grabbed a handful of his long hair, yanking him off balance.

"Whoa! Hey!" Bucky sputtered, momentarily disoriented.

"Sorry, Barnes! Didn't know you were so sensitive about your 'vintage chic' hairstyle," Y/n said, releasing him and darting away.

Sam burst out laughing. Even Steve cracked a smile. Bucky, however, wasn't amused. He charged again, his movements less precise, fueled by irritation.

Y/n knew she couldn't keep this up forever. She was already winded, and her sarcasm reserves were starting to run dry. As Bucky cornered her near the edge of the platform, she knew she was out of options.

"Okay, okay, I surrender!" she yelled, throwing her hands up in the air. "Uncle! Mercy! I admit defeat! You win, metal arm! You’re the best at… uh… arming metal-ly! Yeah, that’s the one.”

Bucky stopped, his expression a mixture of annoyance and begrudging amusement. “You’re impossible, Stark.”

“That’s what my therapist keeps telling me,” Y/n said, panting. She collapsed onto a nearby bench, gathering her breath.

Steve clapped her on the shoulder. "You did well, Y/n. You're quick, and you think on your feet. You just need to work on your… offensive capabilities."

"My offense is impeccable," Y/n said, gesturing to Bucky. "Just ask him. I practically incapacitated him with my devastating wit."

Sam snorted. "Yeah, well, wit doesn't exactly stop a bullet."

"True," Y/n conceded. "But it can annoy someone enough that they forget what they were going to do in the first place. That's a defense mechanism in itself, right?"

She looked up at their faces, a hopeful glimmer in her eyes. They were her dad’s friends, family even. And despite the inherent strangeness of having super soldiers trying to turn her into a miniature Avenger, she knew they cared.

Steve, ever the optimist, gave her a reassuring smile. "It's a start, Y/n. We'll keep working on it."

"Great," Y/n said, her sarcasm returning full force. "Just promise me one thing: next time, can we at least do this in a heated environment? And maybe with a pizza? I'm pretty sure I can weaponize pepperoni."

Bucky rolled his eyes, but there was a hint of a smile playing on his lips. Even he had to admit, Y/n Stark, with her sharp tongue and Stark-brand stubbornness, was growing on him. Even if she did almost pull his hair out. He smirked, “I’d pay to see that.”

As the three men began to pack up, Y/n pulled out her phone. Time to order that pizza. And maybe send Dad a text. Something along the lines of: 'Almost got murdered by Bucky today. Send backup (and maybe a new shield design. Sarcasm-proof, preferably).

Tags:

@parkjihoonsnudes @riowritesitall @mandmilovehim @onelesslonelygirlbieber6 @lgbtq-girl

Dividers by: @issysh3ll

186 notes · View notes

leascorner · 6 months ago

Text

j.b.b. | Fake it ‘till you make it

Summary: Y/N’s ex-boyfriend will be at the Christmas party she will be attending. Bucky poses as Y/N’s +1.

Pairing: Modern!Bucky Barnes x f!reader

Warnings: Use of Y/N and feminine pronoums, a few mentions of food and alcohol, mention of cheating and ghosting people and breaking Y/N's heart, mention of christmas and the dear corporate world, loads of mention of anxiety/stress, some vulgar language

Word Count: 4k

A/N: This is the 3rd Xmas OS of the series. It was a bit thougher to write than I imagined, but I'm quite happy out it turned out. Please do share and like if you enjoyed it, it means a lot!

2024 Christmas Masterlist | Main Masterlist

Y/N’s hands were so sweaty that she had to wipe them on her black coat every five minutes. The air in the car was warm and cosy, a sharp contrast with the cold and dry weather outside. If it should have relaxed her, it wasn’t enough. Instead, she couldn’t stop her right leg from shaking and her heart was beating so fast that it made her blood ring in her ears. She couldn’t believe that even after all this time he was making her this nervous.

Though, it wasn’t him exactly; it was this whole situation…

The he in question was her ex. An ex that, one night, had decided to throw away a four-year-long relationship with a note left on the kitchen counter of their shared apartment. An apartment from which he had planned to move out without facing her. Too bad for him, that same night, Y/N had gotten back from work earlier than expected and had, of course, walked in on him moving out. In the end, she had been the one to kick him out. Nevertheless, the shock had been real when, one week later, Natasha, her dear friend, had seen him at the supermarket, hands in hands with some other woman.

He had broken her entirely: her heart, her trust in this world, her self-esteem and probably everything else. More than one year later, she was still fixing what he had done to her. So naturally, when she heard that he was going to attend the Christmas party of the firm she was working at, she did the only thing she thought she was capable of… She decided not to go.

That was without counting on Natasha, who was determined not to let this slip that easily. He was the bastard that broke her friend. He would be the one daring to attend the Christmas party of the firm his ex was working on for more than six years now. He was only a small accountant from the accounting company to which finance had started to outsource their activities a couple of weeks ago. He was insignificant, while Y/N was expected to take on the role of head of her department after the retirement of her manager. Y/N couldn’t simply decide to not attend. She was going to be there and showing how much better she was doing without him.

Thanks heaven, she wasn’t going to do this alone. When Natasha had succeeding in convincing her to go to this party, Y/N had admitted she didn't feel like going alone. Sure, there would be her coworkers – she had become good friends with a few of them and all were aware of her romantic situation ship (or lack of, therefore). However, between Gina and her three kids, Maria on maternity leave, and Zach who she knew was going to hit on every waiter present, she needed more support. Y/N had made puppy eyes to Natasha, trying to get her to come with her. A look in her agenda later, the redhead had declared with a huge smile on her lips that she would be in Europe that week, closing the most important deal of the year for her own company. That was how Bucky had offered to be her “+1” for the night.

Ever since, Natasha had made up this fantasy of Bucky posing as Y/N’s fiancé for the night. She wanted Y/N’s ex to know Y/N was doing better, much better indeed, now that he wasn’t in her life anymore. At first, Y/N had embraced this idea, it was only payback for the way he had embarrassed her. However, thinking about it again, it definitely didn’t feel like such a good idea. How pathetic was she to try and make him jealous when the simple thought of him should make her indifferent…

Y/N had gotten cold feet a million times. If it wasn’t for Bucky insisting to call a cab to pick them both up and then have it drive them to the party, she would have spent her Friday evening ordering pizza and watching Netflix or if she would have had the courage to get out in the cold, testing this new winery bar that opened downtown to drink away her sorrow.

Even now, on her way to the party, she was only a second away to ask for the car to turn around and go back home. It would be a shame with all the money she had put in her outfits, make-up and hair, and with how Bucky had dressed up too, but she could still pretend to be not feeling well or be sick, no?

She was so lost in her thoughts that she hadn't noticed that the car had stopped, and her door was already opening. A wave of panic washed over her.

She did not want to be here.

She wanted to be anywhere, but here.

“Hey,” Bucky spoke, and she was surprised to see that he was the one to have open the door car. She had not realized Bucky had already gotten out and was offering her his hand to help her get out as well. “Just like we said,” he searched for her eyes as he took a deep inspiration. Eyes lost in the blue of his eyes; she copied him instinctively. It was just one night; she reminded herself to try to ease her nerves. As did Bucky, she breathed out. “It’s going to be okay,” he promised. She nodded weakly, still hooked to his eyes as if they were buoys.

They continued to breathe together for the time she needed to successfully calm herself and her heartbeat. When she was ready, she grabbed her handbag and took his hand. She couldn’t help but notice how her heart fluttered in her chest and how her cheeks heated up when their skin touched, but she quickly pushed the thought aside.

This was how Bucky was, not only with her, but with everyone. He was very well mannered and always nice; opening the door, pulling out the chair for the person he was with to sit down, offering his coat or jacket were anyone too cold. One smile and everyone would fall for him. Y/N couldn’t lie, Bucky was also very good looking. Tall, but not too tall. Definitely muscly under his button-up shirts. Flashing bright smiles. Piercing blue eyes.

Y/N had met him through Natasha. At that time, she had just moved to New York, and they worked at the same company. Natasha had introduced her to her group of friends; people she had been to university with: Wanda, Clint, Sam, Steve, and Bucky – and she was quick to be a part of the group.

While they had always been in the same group of friends, they had never been particularly close. Bucky being Bucky, he was always eager to know what was going on in her life, always interested in discussing about her hobbies, but they had never hanged out outside of their little group gatherings.

Y/N only really acknowledged him after her break-up. It was as if she had worn blinders for all those years. Suddenly, she realized he had been there all along. He continued being nice to her and much more than that. He became a really good friend, showing up at her place with ice-cream so she could cry her heart out. He listened and dried her tears. More than anything else, he made her feel important.

Like he really cared.

And in this past year, it had been everything to her.

As they walked into the building where the party was happening, Bucky spoke to her about the plans Steve and him had over the weekend. He spoke to her as if they were only going to the supermarket do groceries on a Tuesday night. She realized what he was doing – he was trying to clear her mind – and she was grateful for it. It did stop the easiness in her stomach and thankfully, the cold of the night made her hands dry.

In the hall, Bucky took her coat to leave it in the cloakroom. It was the exact same moment her phone decided to ring.

Natasha, less than one minute ago: Don’t forget to send me a picture of the two of you.

Natasha, less than one minute ago: And have fun!

Smiling, Y/N send her a quick answer, a mix of ‘yes mom’ with a rolling eyes emoji and ‘have a good day’ wherever she was – Natasha’s schedule was so hectic it was a bit difficult to follow sometimes; she could have been in London in the morning and Moscow at night.

Y/N put her phone back in her handbag as Bucky walked back to her. With a motion of his hand, he invited her to lead the way and enter in the reception room. His right hand rested in between her shoulder blades that her backless dress left naked. His palm was barely touching her skin, yet the touch of his fingertips grounded her, made her focus on him rather than what was happening around them.

“Y/N!” Gina called out as soon as they entered the room. She left her husband with her boss and nearly came running in their direction.

To Y/N’s disappointment, Bucky’s hand left her back as he let her go to greet her colleague. Gina didn’t lose time to hug Y/N as if the last time they had seen each other was not in the HR meeting that same morning. From the empty glass in her hands, Y/N assumed she had already started to celebrate the end of the year. Gina had never been one to handle alcohol well.

“Bucky, right?” Gina questioned as she turned to her left, to him.

“And you must be Gina.” Bucky stated in return. Gina giggled like a middle school girl – that was typically Bucky’s effect and even if Y/N knew him for a good decade now, it still amazed her. Gina went for a hug and Bucky happily obliged, barely touching her though.

“Hot,” Gina mouthed not so silently to Y/N, who was standing behind them.

Y/N only gave her a stern look and watched as Gina took her sweet time to let him go. If she had thought for a long time already that she would never let Natasha and Gina meet, she knew now that she was indeed right. The two of them in the same room would be the death of her.

Thankfully, someone going up on the stage in front of the dance floor was enough to put poor Bucky out of his misery. The CEO of the firm was about to give his traditional end-of-year speech, and everyone was invited to listen. Gina’s husband was quick to get her to join the crowd who was quickly gathering around the stage.

Y/N turned to Bucky who still wore his typical soft smile and acting as if the interaction with Gina had never happened. Maybe it happened to him more often than Y/N would know. “She is… something. I’m sorry.”

Bucky chuckled to wave it off and only offered her his arm, “Shall we?”

As they stand next to each other, in the crowd of the firm employees in front of the stage, Y/N only listened to the speech with one ear. She couldn’t help watching around the room. She saw the faces of all the persons in the crowd, some she had never seen before and a few familiar ones. Somewhere in the crowd, her eyes met with Zach who raised his glass to her, and she nodded in return to acknowledge him; considering who he was with, she knew she was most likely not going to see him again tonight. Thankfully, she didn’t see her ex and release a breath she didn’t know she was holding.

When her eyes turned to Bucky, he was already looking at her. For the first time, she saw a very subtle frown on his face. He was worried about her. Even if he had agreed to it – and he did so willingly, she felt bad for having him spend the night with her, attending a Christmas party where he knew nobody even more so. The company he was working at must also have its own Christmas party and everybody knew that one company Christmas party a year was much than enough. She wanted him to have a good time, not remembering this night in a bad way. So, she needed to relax.

She was so lost in her thoughts that Bucky had to nudge her in the ribs so she would applause at the end of the speech.

“Do you want a drink?” Y/N said more for herself than Bucky at her side. Without waiting for him to answer, she continued: “I’ll get us some drinks.”

And just like that, she had left him on the spot and was walking in direction of the bar. One second later, she was turning back and walking to where Bucky was still standing. He looked at her, surprised.

“Thank you so much.”

Bucky smiled, sweetly. That was probably what she liked the most about him, he knew exactly was she was on about. “Doll, pleasure is all mine.”

Doll… Bucky wouldn’t stop calling her by all those sweet nicknames ever since the break-up. It somehow made her stomach fluttered. She wished he was only using those with her, but she knew with how he was, he did it with everyone else.

“No, really,” she insisted. “You didn’t have to do it.” Bucky was going to answer something when she cut him off. “You must think I am pathetic to do this. I swear, I do not have any feeling for him anymore. I just don’t want him to think he won. He can’t be the one to have thrown away a four-years-long relationship and be the one to walk away happy. Not after all he put me through.”

Slowly, Bucky took her chin into his right hand, his eyes meeting hers again. She had not noticed, but they were yet again so close to one another.

“Love, we are going a hell of a time tonight. Screw him. You are much better without him. You would have to be blind not to see it.”

And what a time they were going to have indeed…

After a couple of drinks, Y/N was much comfortable about being here that night. Bucky had somehow managed to get them a full tray of appetizers for them both to share as their dinner. They had been joined by Zach afterwards, who against all odds spent a part of his evening with them. They shared some shots of vodka, took a dozen of silly pictures at the photobooth that was set up, and once the DJ had started to play actual music, they had been quick to join the dance floor. In the crowd of employees, Bucky had made Y/N spun around herself more times than she could count. His hands had been on herself at all times – on her hips, on her arms, on her back, definitely leaving Y/N aching for more.

“I need to take a break.” Y/N announced after a while as she started to walk away from the dance floor. Zach was too busy with some other man to care about her and Bucky was quick to follow her.

“You good?” he asked. As the music was too loud, Y/N only saw his lips moving without hearing what he had said. Bucky stepped closer and had his lips close to her ear to repeat her question.

“Yes,” she nodded, moving her hands in front of herself as a fan to have some air. She had this hotness on her cheeks and nose; her backless dress was now clenched to her features. At this point, she didn’t know anymore if it was from all the dancing or from him being so close to him. She was hot, needed some air and probably also a drink. “I’m thirsty. Do you want something?”

Bucky had to lean in again onto her to let her know what he wanted to drink. Y/N gave him a thumbs-up before walking to the bar. She was wearing a big smile on her lips and was feeling absolutely content. As she walked away from the dance floor, she thought this night couldn’t have gone better… except her feet in those heels and she would have to drink water at some point if she didn’t wish to wake up with a massive headache… And that, as if destiny was playing with her, her eyes landed on the only person that could spoil her night.

Y/N’s smile faded when she was her ex, waiting for his drink at the bar, hand pianoing on the wood of the counter, eyes scanning the room. Bucky’s presence had finally made her totally forget what she had asked him to come for in the first place.

Sighing, she decided she wasn’t going to turn back now. She didn’t have to talk to him, let alone have to look at him. She went to the bar side on her left, at the very opposite of him. Focusing on the barmaid that smiled when she stood against the bar, she repeated Bucky’s whisky order and ordered a soft drink for her. She was about to get back to Bucky with their drinks when a shadow overed on her.

“Y/N, how nice to see you,” his snide voice called her out.

Her two drinks in her hand, she turned to look at him with a stern sight. Still the same charming smile. The same malicious eyes. That same dimple. It had made her heart flattered in the past, though now it only made her want to vomit.

“It has been a long time, how have you been?”

“I am awaited,” was all she answered. Her tone was not rude – though she would have very much like to throw her glass to his face; it was only very firm to pass on the idea that she did not want to talk to him. At all.

“Oh, so you’ve been able to coax someone to come with you?” he said, grabbing on her elbow to keep her from moving away from him.

“Her boyfriend, actually.”

Bucky appeared at her side, out of nowhere. The surprise made him drop his hold on her, making Y/N lose her balance. Thankfully, Bucky firm hand found the exposed skin of her lower back in a second and she gently crashed onto his side.

Unsure of what to do, Y/N looked back at Bucky, who was now getting his drink out of her hands.

“Thank you, doll.”

He smiled at her, and she smiled back, loosing herself in his blue eyes, totally forgetting the room around her and the fact that her ex was right in front of them. The physical contact of his skin on hers was started to make her head fizzy. Or was it the multiples drinks of Champagne finally making it to her head?

“Nice to have seen you again, buddy.”

And without waiting for an answer, Bucky brought Y/N with him to a cocktail table, not so far from the dance floor, but a little bit calmer where they could talk. A couple of steps away from her ex, when he knew they weren’t within earshot, he leaned on Y/N to mutter:

“See, wasn’t that bad.”

Y/N smiled weakly and took down the glass of orange juice she had ordered in one go, now wishing she had ordered vodka with it. Her heart in her chest was pounding and she felt his eyes on her back; he was watching them. All her energy seemed to have left her body. Their encounter had been like a wake-up call, and she didn’t want to be here any longer.

Yet, she didn’t want to be the first one to leave, she didn’t want to let him win. So, she tried to calm herself and she stayed at the limit of the dance floor, watching her colleagues dancing the night away before her eyes. Bucky stayed at her side. He did not say a word, probably because he had understood she did not want to talk.

It was only when the DJ played a slow dancing song that Y/N seemed to wake up from her trance and turned to him.

“Would you dance with me?”

Bucky didn’t need much persuading and was quick to grab Y/N’s hand to lead her to the dance floor. He found them an empty space, where he had her turned to him. His hands immediately found a place on her naked back, sending shivers down her spine, and her hands found their way to the back of his neck.

They moved slowly, body pressed against one another. Y/N let her head fall on his chest while he slowly stoked the skin of her back. Her belly tingled in such a strong way that she finally had the courage to look at him in the eyes. When their eyes met, he was already looking at her, a small smile on his lips that inadvertently draw Y/N’s eyes. His lips were so close, so reachable, that she was tempted to just lean in and see what would happen. The fire in her stomach wanted her to do it. After all, she had already lost so many things this year, nothing worse could happen, right?

She bit her own lips and tried to come back to earth. Bucky was a good friend and if it meant losing him, she didn’t want to risk it. He was too precious to ruin everything, even if she wanted him more than anything.

“What would you say of getting out of here?” Bucky asked when the song finished. Even though the next song was not slow-rhythmed, they had stayed in the same position. Body pressed together, moving slowly.

“Yes, please.”

Yet, none of them moved.

They kept eyeing each other, Y/N’s gaze going from his eyes to his lips and back again. Finally, Bucky made a move. Her breath got caught in her throat when Bucky’s hand took a loose string of her hair and put it behind her ear. The air seemed to have thickened and the time to have paused.

His hand hot on her cheek, he leaned in slowly.

“Please,” she begged him to put her out of her misery.

He chuckled deeply and leaned him more, their lips barely touching. Y/N didn’t waste a second more and brought him closer, crashing their lips a bit too brutally together that they could hear their teeth crashing together. Y/N withdrawn, eyes wide, worried she had hurt him.

“I’m so sor-” Bucky was quick to kiss her again, this time much gently. A second first kiss that they would remember. One of those kisses that would electrify their whole body. One of those kisses that would leave their lips swollen and them asking for more.

“Let’s get out of here.”

Once again, Y/N let Bucky grab her hand and lead her to the cloakroom. He asked for their coats with the ticket he had kept in his wallet as Y/N stood her back against the wooden counter, trying to realize what was going on. She was going to go home, with him of all people.

“Well, that was one hell of a show out there,” Zach whispered as he stood next to her. He too was waiting in line to get his coat and go home with the person at his side, a man from the Californian office she had seen twice in her life. “Couldn’t figure out if you were faking it or not.”

Y/N turned to Bucky at her side, whose hand was still holding her hip, as if he was scared, she would slip away. Then, she turned back to Zach, a big smile on her face.

“Definitely not fake.”

630 notes · View notes

narcissisticmf · 6 months ago

Text

sleepless nights | bucky barnes x fem!reader

description: y/n has a nightmare and bucky comforts her in the night.

trigger warnings: anxiety, fear, fluff, mentions of alcohol usage, some seductive behavior, etc. read at your own risk.

word count: 1k

A hazy image took place beneath your closed lids as you tossed and turned beneath the bedsheets. You felt your body yearning to waken, to get rid of the terrifying picture that was before you.

You sucked in a breath and fluttered your eyes open. Breathing heavily, you looked into the darkness of your shared room with Bucky in the Compound. You turned over, as slowly as your body allowed, and faced him.

Desiring nothing more than to be close to him, you nestled into his side, beneath his metal arm. It exuded a coolness that eased the tension in your shoulders and throughout your entire body.

The previous night, you'd had a few more glasses of wine than you'd care to admit. It was the holidays, after all. It made sense to have a couple extra drinks. You hated to admit it, but alcohol always affected your sleep; in a negative way... bad dreams, restless sleep, etc.

Bucky's chest rose and fell against your cheek as you clung to him tightly. You didn't realize he was awake until you heard his gruff voice whisper into the dark.

"You alright, sweetheart?"

Shaking your head, you wrapped your arms around his torso tighter—as though you couldn't get close enough. Bucky pressed a warm kiss to the top of your head and ran his fingers through the tangled mess of your hair.

"You wanna talk about it?" he asked, dipping his chin down to speak more intimately to you.

"I don't think so," you replied, your voice gravelly.

"Okay," Bucky nodded and engulfed you further into his grasp.

The gesture was simple, yes. But it sent a warm shiver down your spine, leaving gooseflesh across your exposed skin. The rhythmic rise and fall of his chest eased your discomfort; the hazy picture of your dream slowly fading into nothingness.

"You want some tea or hot chocolate?" Bucky inquired. He was always the acts of service type of guy, which you appreciated.

"I don't wanna be alone," you lifted your head to stare up at him. He turned his head down to meet your gaze, taking note of the glassiness of your eyes.

"You can come with me, sweetheart," Bucky's lips pressed against your cheek, sending a rush of warmth from that spot to every other inch of your body.

"Okay," you nodded, sleepily as Bucky peeled the duvet back. He climbed out of the bed and came around to your side. He stared down at you lovingly, tracing his fingertips across the shell of your ear.

"You gotta get up if you wanna come with me, doll," he sat against the edge of the bed and pressed a lingering kiss to your neck. You closed your eyes and basked in the sensation.

"Mhm," you hummed and wrapped your arms around his neck, hugging him warmly. He released a soft breath and wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you up onto his lap.

"C'mon," he whispered and pushed himself off the mattress, still holding you snugly. Your legs wrapped around his waist as he carried you through the halls of the Compound, towards the kitchen.

"My girl.." Bucky whispered into your ear, pressing a tender kiss to the skin just below it. Your arms, draped around his shoulders, held onto him tightly; your cheek resting against the metal of his arm exposed there.

Before you knew it, Bucky entered the large kitchen and set you against the cold marble countertop. His arms were placed on either side of you, enclosing you in. His cerulean eyes gazed into you, his metallic fingers tracing your exposed thigh.

"What can I get you?" he whispered, leaning in to place another kiss to your cheek. Before you could respond, he placed another one to the hollow of your throat. You sucked in a soft breath, so soft you almost didn't feel it until Bucky pointed it out. "I felt that, sweetheart," he grinned that stupid, handsome grin.

"I want tea," you whispered and cupped his face, forcing him to look at you. His jawline was stubbled from not shaving for a few days. You loved the way it felt against your fingers and beneath the palms of your hands. You also had a thing for the way it felt between your thi—

"What kind?" Bucky asked, gazing at you with so much amorance.

"Chai," you whispered, your toes curling beneath his stare.

His lips curled into an almost feline smile, as if knowing exactly what was going on in that head of yours. He peeled away from the counter and quickly made your tea the way he knew you liked.

The mug was steaming when he handed it to you. You took it with care, not wanting to spill it anywhere on yourself, on the counter, or on him.

Bucky pushed himself up onto the marble to sit beside you. He listened to you sip your drink and the both of you reveled in the stillness between you.

He was just... there. With you.

Because that's what he knew you needed.

It wasn't long before you finished your tea, it was soothing against your tongue and down your throat. It rid the cold sweat that glazed your entire body.

"All done?" Bucky questioned softly. You nodded and handed him the empty mug. He slipped off the counter and rested it into the sink, to take care of in the morning. He turned to face you fully and cupped your face, pressing a tender kiss against your lips.

You eased into the gesture and draped your arms around his neck, eyes closing slowly.

Once he pulled back, he lifted you into his arms and carried you back up to your shared bedroom. When he laid you down into the bed and climbed into his side, Bucky's arms engulfed you in a warm and tight embrace. You fell asleep entangled with him and didn't have another nightmare that evening

a/n: happy christmas, you beautiful people!! i had a terrible nightmare last night cuz i had five glasses of this sweet raspberry wine and alcohol fucks with my sleep and gives me nightmares. i woke up at like 4am and watched inside out to calm myself down 😭 anyway, i hope yall had a nice holiday! and i hope you also enjoyed this fluffy yet kinda seductive thingy! lol i love you guys ty so much for reading and spending your year with me :) im grateful for all of you sm <3 — angelina.

100 notes · View notes

justanoasisimagines · 1 year ago

Text

Joaquin Torres Blurb #1

Summary; Joaquin wants to ask you something and he doesn't know how so he surprises you with dinner. Pairing; Joaquin Torres X Female Reader A/N; Requests are open! Credit to @cafekitsune for the banner and the divider

Joaquin wasn't used to this. Nervous and full of contemplation. He was assured this was the next step. It was the right move. So why was he struggling to come up with a way to ask you? If this was difficult, asking you to marry him would be a nightmare.

Joaquin spent three days searching through the internet, questioning Sam and Bucky. Even then he wasn't positive, but he had a plan nonetheless.

Joaquin invited you over for dinner, he'd prepared all of your favourite dishes. He'd slaved away for hours, covering the floor with rose petals and lightening candles. Tonight had to be perfect. Creating the perfect ambiance.

"Wow. This looks amazing" You commented as Joaquin pulled out a chair for you.

"Only the best for you angel"

"Well something smells amazing"

"I prepared your favorites" Dinner commenced with light, trivial conversation. A calm atmosphere despite the nerves raging in Joaquin's stomach.

As it came round to desert. Joaquin's hands began to tremble. This was finally it. By the end of the dessert, he'd finally know the question he'd been dying to ask you.

When Joaquin returned with desert and a brightly colored bag. He took a deep breath, attempting to locate as much courage as possible before he placed the bag and the bowl in front of you.

"Before you have dessert. I want you to have this"

"Have I forgotten our anniversary or something?"

"No. Just open it" Opening the bag, you began to pull out many sheets of brightly coloured tissue paper. Reaching in you pulled out a set of keys.

"What are these to?" You questioned as Joaquin placed his hand on top of yours.

"This place. I was wondering if you'd like to move in with me. "

"Yeah of course I would"

#Joaquin Torres imagines #Joaquin Torres imagine #Marvel imagines #Marvel imagine #Joaquin Torres one shot #Joaquin Tores oneshot #Marvel oneshot #Marvel one shot #Joaquin Torrres x Reader #MCU Imagines #MCU imagine #MCU oneshot #MCU one shot

71 notes · View notes

marie-swriting · 1 year ago

Text

To Be With You - Kate Bishop

Marvel Masterlist

Summary : After having a nightmare about you dying, Kate is scared for your safety but she doesn't know how to talk to you about her fears.

Warnings : character's death in a dream, anxiety, mention of Natasha's death, hurt/comfort, angst, happy ending, maybe some grammatical mistakes as English is not my first language, tell me if you see some or if I missed any warning.

Word count : 2.6k

French version

Song inspiration : Talk Too Much by Reneé Rapp

Fear can be read on Kate’s face, her wide opened eyes are set on you. Her bow is armed with an arrow, she doesn’t know whether she should shoot or find an other solution to save you. On the edge of the building roof, Wilson Fisk has his arm around your neck while his other hand holds a gun against your temple. Your body is shaking and your eyes are full of tears whilst you gaze at Kate, completely terrified.

“You should listen to me, Kate, and give me what I want or you can say goodbye to your girlfriend.” Fisk threatens with a harsh voice. “If you really loved her, you would’ve already saved her.”

“I’m not giving you anything.”

“Are you sure about that?” He replies before shooting you in the legs to prove he’s being serious.

“Let her go!” Kate yells following you cry of pain.

“You know what you have to do to save her life.”

“Fine! I’m gonna give it to you, just let her go.”

“Kate, no!” you scream while Fisk tightens his grip on your neck.

Reluctantly, Kate slowly puts down her bow on the ground whilst looking at you as a way to reassure you. She takes her bag off her back and throws it at Fisk. A machiavellian smirk on his face, Fisk loosens his grip however he still doesn’t let you go. You can finally breathe a bit more easily when Fisk suddenly throws you on the side and grabs the bag. You scream as you feel yourself falling off the roof. Your body goes on the other side of the edge when a pair of hands grabs yours. Looking up, you see Kate holding you with all her might.

“It’s gonna be okay, I’ve got you! I’m gonna pull you up. Hold on.” she comforts you as she tries to haul you up and Fisk runs away from the scene.

“Kate, I don’t have any more strength.”

A tear rolls down your face the second you talk. You’re physically exhausted. Fisk kidnapped you for a whole day to set a trap on Kate and he didn’t go easy on you - he’s known for his cruelty and you’ve seen it first hand. However, you do everything to help Kate to haul you up, in vain.

“I’m gonna find a solution. I’m gonna pull you up. I’m gonna do it.” Kate repeats to reassure you but also herself.

In addition to your fear, acceptance also takes over your body. You know she won’t be able to do it. Kate might be strong yet, you feel your hands slowly slipping from hers so, you tenderly look at her with a comforting smile.

“It’s gonna be okay, Kate. I love you.”

Kate’s panic stops as soon as she hears your sentence, it’s the first time you say ‘I love you’. You’ve only been together for three months and until now, you didn’t dare to say those three words.

“I told you I’m gonna pull you up! Don’t say this as if you-”

“Kate, it’s okay.” you say softly.

“No, stop it. I-”

Kate doesn’t have the time to finish her sentence that your hands slip from hers and you fall down the building. Kate yells your name at the top of her lungs, your fall being engraved in her memory. The thud of your body colliding with the ground resonates and Kate can’t look away from you.

Kate takes a deep breath as she sits on her bed, panting. A hand on her chest, she tries to make sense of her nightmare. Kate brutally waking up makes you open your eyes so you turn around and see her, all shaken up. You sit down and put your hand on her shoulder, at your touch, she abruptly faces you, fear being replaced with relief in her eyes. You barely have the time to notice a tear streaming down her face when Kate throws herself in your arms.

“Kate, what’s wrong?” you question, worried.

“Everything is okay, you’re here.”

“You don’t seem okay.”

“I’m fine, don’t worry. I just had a dream.” she lies, breaking the hug and faking a smile.

“Wanna talk about it? You seem pretty upset because of it.”

“No need. It was nothing. It was just a stupid dream, it didn’t mean anything. I’m fine.” Kate quickly says before standing up from the bed. “I have to go, I have training soon. You can stay here, if you want to or you can do something else, I’ll probably be home late. Be careful and call me if there’s anything weird.”

Kate finishes her rambling by pecking your lips and then, she runs away from her bedroom as if it was on fire. You stare at where she left, completely confused. Despite what she said, you can see right through her and you know this dream upset her. You tell yourself you should talk to her about it once she’s calmed down.

The following days, Kate’s nightmare keeps haunting her mind and she still hasn’t talked about it. Her nightmare made her question herself, more specifically your relationship. Though she’s never said it out loud, she loves you and she can’t lose you. Yet, since she became a vigilante after meeting Clint Barton, she has to take into account the dangers of this new life. Clint mentioned Natasha a few times and even if her death wasn’t like the one in her nightmare, the fact is, the Avengers are in constant danger and by extent their loved ones, too. Besides, since Kate’s mom went to jail, she is even more scared to lose the people she loves.

Now that Kate has realised what it truly means being in a relationship with her, she’s not sure you’ve realised it, too. Kate is afraid to be the cause of your death due to her lifestyle so she wants to push you away, but she also wants to keep you close to her, though she knows it might be selfish on her part. She should talk to you about it, on the other hand if she does, she’ll just fall down a rabbit hole by saying too much and probably breaking up with you, her fears growing everyday so she prefers to stay silent.

Obviously you’ve noticed she acts differently. You’ve tried to put her at ease several times without being too direct, fearing you’ll get her back up, however she always avoids the subject.

“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Kate asks, worried, searching for a potential wound.

She doesn't mention her nightmare even a week after and stays lost in her own thoughts. It kills you to see her distance yourself from you like this. You try to talk to her as much as you can but it's like talking to a brick wall and yet you keep making the conversation even if Kate doesn't seem to pay attention.

One day, whilst you’re both walking in the street, you tell Kate about your last exam. As usual the second you’re talking with someone, you don’t pay attention to where you’re going, focusing on your interlocutor. As you’re talking about how you feel about your exam, you just feel Kate violently grabbing you and making you take a step back then you see a blue car driving fast and honking.

“Thanks to you, I’m fine.”

“You really need to look in front of you when you’re talking, especially while walking in the streets!” she retorts, annoyed, “If I hadn’t been there, you could have had an accident! They were driving super fast, they could have hit you. Do you have any idea how reckless you are? You scared me! What if I hadn’t seen this car, you would have died in front of me!”

“But you saw it just in time and you pulled me back before it could hit me. I’m fine, Kate, we were more scared than hurt.” you calmly affirm, hoping to ease the tension.

“Because you were lucky! You won’t always be, something can happen to you at any given moment.”

Kate’s breath gets more jerky and you understand this goes way deeper than a bad driver. You force Kate to look at you before saying with a reassuring tone:

“Kate, breathe. I’m fine, you’re fine, we’re both fine.”

“I got so scared.”

“I know. Come on, let’s go to my place.” you tell her as you start to drag her in the opposite direction.

“But you wanted to buy the new book you’ve been waiting for months.” Kate protests, confused.

“I’ll buy it another day. We should get home, far away from the cars.” you state with a small smile though Kate isn’t in the mood to laugh. “Too soon?”

“Yes, barely two minutes after your almost accident is too soon.”

“Sorry. Come on.” you say, taking Kate’s hand in yours.

You turn around and start walking to your place whilst you stroke Kate’s hand with your thumb as a way to comfort her. Kate’s reaction confirms you have to make her talk, even if you have to force her. Something is wrong and she’s anxious, more specifically about you and you don’t know why.

Once you get in your small apartment, you let her sit on your couch whilst you make two hot chocolates - no matter the season, Kate loves to drink them. You hope the hot drinks will put her at ease so she’ll talk more easily. As soon as the beverages are ready, you join her on the couch. You let her take a few sips before speaking.

“Kate, we need to talk.”

“I don’t wanna talk about it.” she states, avoiding your gaze.

“You’re clearly anxious about something, you can’t just stay in your fear all alone. Talk to me.”

“I…,” Kate starts with hesitation, “I wonder if you really know what you got yourself into when you decided to date me and if it’s not the case then, I wonder if you’ll still want to be with me when you’ll realise it.”

“Why are you saying that?”

“You died.” she bluntly states.

“Kate, the car didn’t run me over.”

“In my dream.”

“The one you had last week? Why didn’t you tell me?” you question, starting to understand the situation better.

“You died and it was my fault.”

“I’m sure that’s not true.”

“It is,” Kate insists with teary eyes, “Fisk found me again and he wanted my bag - I have no idea what was so precious in this bag but he wouldn’t let it go and to force me to give it to him, he had kidnaped you. He even shot you in the leg and once I finally gave him the bag, he threw you off the building roof - because, yeah we were on a building roof - and I tried to pull you back but I didn’t have enough strength and… and you fell.” she tells you, her voice breaking at her last sentence. “You died and it was my fault. If I had listened to Fisk earlier, if I had had more strength-”

“Kate, it was only a dream.” you interrupt her, taking her hand in yours.

“It didn’t feel like a dream, it felt so real and it made me think.” Kate retorts, putting her cup on the living room table. “At any moment, it could be real. Now that I’ve worked with Hawkeye and with my mom who worked for Fisk, I could be a target and I don’t want you to get hurt because of me. I care about you too much to lose you, especially if it’s my fault. And even if I’m no Spider-man or Captain America, with time, I could have more enemies way more ruthless than Fisk and Fisk is awful enough. This nightmare was like a wake-up call, I can’t be with you because it means you’re in danger and you're already putting yourself in danger when you’re talking in the street without looking where you’re going. Who walks without watching where they’re going seriously?” She rambles before going back to her main argument. “The fact is, by dating me, you put yourself in danger and it’s something you should keep in mind,” Kate adds before taking a deep breath. “Okay, having said all that, do you still wanna be with me? ‘Cause, like, I wanna be with you, maybe even forever, holy shit, maybe not forever. I mean, I’m not saying ‘not forever,’” Kate nervously adds without giving you the time to answer, “I actually have no idea what I’m saying. Are you mad at me because I’m pushing you to break up with me because of a stupid nightmare? You’re mad at me, I’m sure of it and it’s cool if you are, I don’t care. It’s just that with this dream, I can’t stop wondering if it’s a sign, like a premonitory one, you know and if it’s true, I’d forever resent myself for not protecting you by giving you an exit when there was still a chance. And, oh my God, I think I talk too much.” Kate tells herself, “I’m talking too much, aren’t I? I should let you talk. Like you said, we should talk and… Ah! Just shut the fuck up!” she screams, frustrated.

“I haven’t said anything!” you reply, putting your hands up to prove your innocence.

“Not you, sorry, I meant me.” Kate corrects with a guilty face. “I meant I should shut up and let you talk.”

“Can I talk?” you ask after letting her breath for a second. Once she nods, you start speaking again. “Kate, I get your nightmare scared you, but it doesn’t mean it’ll happen. Besides, I knew what I was getting myself into by dating you - I mean, you bragged about working with Hawkeye on our first date so I knew for the whole vigilante thing, potential enemies and everything and I still accepted to go on a second date with you. I’m aware of all of this and despite it, I don’t want us to break up, particularly because of a nightmare.” you add with a soft yet firm voice. “And also, I don’t want to leave you alone. Being a vigilante is already complicated enough, you can’t isolate yourself. You have to talk to me when you’re not okay, especially if you get yourself worried sick. I want to be with you. I might not know how to do archery or fight but I can be here for you. I want to be here for you. You can try and give me every exit you want but I’ll still want to be with you. I love you, Kate.” you confess, looking her straight in the eyes.

“You love me?” Kate questions, stunned.

“Of course.”

“Wow, I didn’t think we were at the stage of our relationship and I didn’t think you’d say it during this kind of conversation. I mean, technically, in my dream, you said it before dying though we should probably forget about that dream. Anyway, I thought you’d say it when we’d be doing something much more romantic. God, I’m rambling again, aren’t I?”

You lightly laugh before putting your hands on both sides of her face and kissing Kate. As she feels your lips on hers, Kate’s fears finally calm down. The kiss only lasts for a few seconds so it can allow Kate to focus on something else, yet it doesn’t mean it’s not full of love and tenderness. Once you break the kiss, Kate gives you a smile you find cute.

“I love you, too.” she says, stroking your right hand on her cheek.

“I love you and I want to be with you, Kate Bishop, no matter what you can say to dissuade me.”

At your words, Kate’s smile gets bigger, grateful she’s found someone so comprehensive and kind as you are. She couldn’t have dreamed of a sweeter girlfriend in this brutal world.

Marvel Masterlist

163 notes · View notes

heliads · 6 months ago

Text

you're going to have to shut this down - steve rogers

You grew up with Steve Rogers in the 1940s and froze with him until the present day, too. When he leaves you after killing Thanos to return to the '40s, it's the biggest betrayal of your life. If there was a way to ever see him again, it would require the crossing of many timelines, something you'd know nothing about. The TVA might, though.

masterlist

a/n: back from the dead! who would have thought (not me). who can say how long. enjoy xoxo

You join the TVA because you have nothing else to do. It’s not a bad gig, all things considered. It makes about as much sense as life normally does for you, which is to say, not at all. You’re getting better about understanding the splashier technology, the speedier cars, the altered accents. Not everything is going to seem like it’s fresh out of the 1940s, because only you are. It’s been several years since they got you out of the ice. By all accounts, you should have settled in a long time ago.

And you have, honestly. You did a good job of learning fast and moving on. Still, all it takes is one odd word of slang you don’t understand or a reference to a world-altering event that you never heard of to shove you two steps back instead of forward. You never expected it to be easy, trying to live in the new century. You just didn’t think you’d have to do it alone, either.

The Avengers helped. Despite the infighting and the many false retirements and the deaths, that job helped put you together more than anything else. Everyone was strange there, so no one was. Even the person out of time.

Maybe that’s why the TVA reached out after it was all over– they knew you needed a fresh start. A new team, too, one that didn’t really care about your understanding of any one particular timeline. It was the perfect fit. Why not risk your life for someone else all over again?

It had made sense at the time. After Thanos was defeated, you’d lost your purpose. The Avengers didn’t technically disband, but enough of the original core had been lost to death and retirement and better things. You could sense a new generation rising up to take the mantle, and, not wanting to go through the same cycle of learning new faces just to lose them again, you stepped aside.

Retirement wasn’t good for you. All that time on your own left you twitchy, waiting for something to do, someone to see. You suppose it wouldn’t have been a problem at all if it weren’t for one specific absence, but that’s just the way it goes sometimes. Maybe you should have learned a long time ago to never bet your happiness on Steve Rogers, because when he left, you felt like you’d lost everything.

Even after all this time, you still can’t fathom why he did it, why he left you behind. You had grown up in the 1940s by his side, next door neighbors and family friends. Your parents knew his, and died around the same time his did, too. You’d been inseparable for as long as you could remember. You thought it was the worst pain in your life when he and Bucky went to war, so you followed, taking on a position as a medic in their regiment.

Steve had been absolutely furious that you’d put yourself into harm’s way like that, but you didn’t care. Everything was good so long as you were still together, and for a while, it was. Sure, it took you a while to remember how to act normally after he underwent his Captain America transformation, but he was still Steve, your Steve. And that was okay.

You were almost starting to believe in fantasies that you’d be able to make it back to Brooklyn one day, and then the cards stopped falling in your favor. First, you were sent to hunt down Zola, which was doomed from the start. You’d lost Bucky from the side of the train, which was the beginning of the end. Steve was spiraling and you knew it. It should have come as no surprise that he’d plunge himself into whatever danger he could find to try and keep his mind off the loss. It should have come as no surprise that you’d go with him.

However, neither of you expected to find yourselves on a plane headed into the ocean. It felt fitting somehow, dying with Steve. Bucky was gone anyway. You might as well join him. It was cold enough that you didn’t feel the water entering your lungs. You knew Steve’s hand was in yours even after you lost the sensation in your fingers. You felt him with you even after you closed your eyes for the final time.

Only, it wasn’t the final time. You woke up after what seemed like a matter of hours and ended up being several decades. The new century was full of trouble, but you and Steve were determined to run headfirst into it. You can still remember listening to the new music with him, quizzing each other on current events, doing everything under the sun together in the name of embracing modernity.

Even if it felt wrong to be so suddenly transplanted out of your normal world and into this bright, fast-paced future, some part of you was glad for it. You’ve had a secret crush on Steve since you were ten years old and starry-eyed for the boy next door. What did you lose by leaving the 1940s, anyway– sickness, the war, significantly worse water quality? Steve needed you here more than he ever needed you there. There was so much more in this modern world that would bring the two of you together, and you were delighted for it.

You were delighted, that is. You had assumed that Steve was, too. He certainly seemed like it, always down to visit a new museum or take a trip out of the city. He’d been happy with you. You were certain about it.

Yet, years after you first woke up together in a strange new world, he traveled back in time to return the Infinity Stones and came back as an old man who had already lived his life back in the 1940s. You weren’t there when it happened. Steve had actually sent you away, back to New York, so you could monitor the sites where the transfer of the Stones would take place to see if anything went wrong in the future. You’ll always wonder if he did that on purpose, to make sure you didn’t come with him, or if he really was worried about something as mundane as the Stones after all.

In the end, you’ll never know. Steve never told you about his plan to go back. You’re certain that Bucky was aware of it, even if he denies it. You saw the look on his face when Bucky returned from the job alone and told you that Steve had made his choice. He wasn’t surprised or shocked like you. He was sad, but accepting, because he already knew.

It was the worst betrayal of your life. You told Steve everything except the fact that you love him, and he left without telling you a single goodbye. Somehow, somewhere along the line you had walked together all your lives, Steve decided that he would rather live and die in the past without you than face the future you’d been building since they took you out of the ice. You’ve tried to remember moments in which he wasn’t happy, when you could have seen the signs and known that Steve was going to leave, but you can’t. Steve never seemed to have a problem with the modern world until he left it. It makes no sense, and so the awful mystery consumes you whole.

It would be one thing to retire from the Avengers with Steve by your side, just like always. Now, though, you’re losing not just your main activity but the last vestige of your heart. Bucky is your friend, close to family, but he’s not Steve and never will be. You’ve tried to spend time with him, but every time you see Bucky, you’re haunted by a third presence that should be there yet isn’t. You haven’t talked in a while. It’s probably better that way, anyway.

Luckily, you weren’t left to your own devices forever. One lonely morning, an orange panel of light opened up in front of you, and out of it stepped Loki, who, according to Thor, should have died when Thanos visited. He’d explained briefly how he was still alive, but focused more on offering you a chance to work with the TVA. Without anything better to do but sit around and mope, you’d agreed.

You and Loki have gotten along well for the most part, surprisingly enough. Barring the part where he’d tried to invade New York, you’ve come in contact with him through Thor several times and gotten along through a shared sarcastic sense of humor and biting wit. You’re probably one of the Avengers Loki tolerates the most, a title you bear with no small semblance of pride. Loki had needed someone to advise him on a variant, and he’d gone to you.

It’s a good job for someone out of time. The timelines all converge and diverge in mysterious ways, so who could truly say what’s current or out-of-date? You help Loki and the other TVA officers in maintaining the timeline. Slowly, you settle in, and you stop thinking about going back to your usual timeline. Why bother, anyway? There’s nothing left for you there. Bucky has moved on. Steve is gone. Your family passed on decades ago, and your friends in the Avengers are dead or busy. It’s not a place for you anymore.

Honestly, it’s decent work, all things considered, until you hear about an errant variant totally destroying not just his universe but every one to cross his path. Loki comes bursting into the main office, which isn’t exactly an uncommon occurrence, but the look in his eyes certainly isn’t. Apparently, there’s some guy who left his universe and started jumping around in many others. He’d stayed in his first place for many years, but made so many major changes that the timeline was all but destroyed. Once this variant took note of the fires he couldn’t put out, he started jumping into other places, doing the same thing in less time.

He’s someone who’ll have to be stopped, to say the least. It’s certainly a cause for concern, but that doesn’t explain the cagey expression on Loki’s face. There’s something he isn’t telling you, to be sure, something big. Something that might make you rethink this assignment entirely.

“Loki,” you say slowly, once the god of mischief has calmed down enough to go from frenetic pacing to merely glaring at the small hologram of Miss Minutes across the room, “What’s really going on here? Who exactly is this variant?”

Loki hesitates, and you know what he’s going to say before he even opens his mouth. This variant isn’t just anyone, is it? No, of course not. That would be too easy, and if you’ve learned anything in your voyages across the timelines, it’s that nothing in any universe is ever easy.

The variant destroying the worlds– it’s Steve. And it’s your Steve specifically, the one who’d decided to leave you to go back in time. It’s the precise version of Steve Rogers from your universe who had abandoned all you’d built to go back and live to old age in the 1940s.

You suck in a harsh breath. “That’s impossible. Steve would never do a thing like that. He saves the universe, he doesn’t destroy it.”

Loki laughs bitterly. “Think again, Y/N. It’s him.”

You shake your head unthinkingly, but as little as you want to even contemplate the idea, you can’t deny that it might be likely. Steve already upset the laws of the multiverse when he went to live his life in the 1940s. Who’s to say what else he might do?

You stand up and join Loki in his pacing. “Don’t go through the usual steps. Bring him here.”

Loki starts to protest, but you silence him with a glance. “Think of it as a favor. You owe me, you know that. I won’t kill him, not yet. Not until I know what’s going on.”

One desk over, Mobius holds up his hands. “Wait, wait. Maybe this Steve is a friend of yours, but he’s still a dangerous variant who is quite literally destroying the fabric of time with every jump he makes. Are you sure that bringing him into the TVA is the best idea?”

You lift a shoulder. “Do you have any other ideas of where to put him?”

Mobius sighs. “No, but I don’t like this.”

“You don’t have to like this,” you tell him, “but I need to talk to Steve. Please.”

You look over at Loki hopefully, and feel a crush of relief when you see him caving. “Fine, but the second Rogers tries anything, we’re all over him. We can’t risk the multiverse for one melodramatic walking flag.”

You chuckle in spite of yourself. It’s not a happy sound. “Just let me see what I can do.”

You have no idea what you’ll do with your errant Steve once he gets here. Before that, though, you’re going to have to solve the problem of bringing him here in the first place. If what Loki says is true, Steve is not going to come quietly.

You’re still having trouble wrapping your mind around the whole concept. Steve– your Steve– destroying timelines? Rampaging through the multiverse? It doesn’t even compute in your mind. After all you’ve seen of him, through every decade, in every incarnation, every uniform, he has still been himself at the core. Even when he just came out of the ice. Even when he lost Bucky after Thanos’ snap. Even when you lost the biggest battle of your lives.

Something must have happened to him when he was going back in time, that’s all you can imagine. It’s certainly a better thing to tell yourself, it makes you believe that there was a reason outside his control that he would have left you in the dust. Yes, this must be the fault of traveling through time, and not the simple fact that Steve didn’t want you anymore.

You suit up with the rest, ready to head out and collect your errant Captain. You deliberate over the helmet when Mobius advises you to hide your face in any way possible. He’s had many bad dealings with variants over the years, he claims. No one knows what Steve would do if he saw you.

Face obscured, you walk through a Timedoor to the latest universe Steve has attempted to conquer. It doesn’t take long to find a disturbance; you’ve hardly stepped through the orange portal before you’re greeted with the sound of screaming, the smell of smoke. Buildings are burning. It’s like the world is on fire, and all you can think about is that somehow, Steve caused this.

“We have to move fast,” Mobius urges. “The timeline is unraveling by the second. Find the variant and drag him through a Timedoor as fast as you can.”

You nod your assent and start moving. The easiest thing to do is to head towards the center of the chaos, and so you do, the other TVA agents not far behind you. The smoke gets thicker, all culminating around one building in the center of the city. With a chill, you realize it’s what should be the old Avengers complex, but the letters on the outside still read Stark Tower. This universe might not have gotten the chance to ever get its Avengers, so there is no one to fight off a corrupted Rogers except the TVA, too little and too late.

“I see him,” Loki shouts suddenly, pointing towards a figure moving through the rubble. “Amazing, his hair shines even in a bonfire.”

You don’t have it in you to laugh, but surge forward recklessly. You have to see, you have to know, is it him? Could it be? As you draw closer, you’re certain that you see him, that Steve is here after all this time. A lump rises in your throat utterly unrelated to the pollutants clogging the air. You’ve missed him for so long, and now he’s right in front of you.

Mobius flings out an arm, stopping you short. “Wait,” he says. “He’s a variant, Y/N. Remember that.”

You come thundering back to reality at his words. When you look again, Steve isn’t standing there harmlessly, but holding an unconscious figure in his arms, the head thudding lifelessly against his bicep. This is the real Steve right now, someone you could never recognize.

Two of the TVA agents hurry forward, attempting to cuff him, but Steve brushes them aside easily, even after Loki and Mobius try to enter the fray. Suddenly, the situation looks like you’ll lose it for good, until a wild, terrible idea occurs to you and you shout out to him, “Steve!”

Instantly, Steve’s whole body goes rigid, and he starts scanning the area frantically. “Y/N?” He calls out.

He sounds like a madman, that’s the first thought that rises to your mind. His eyes are wide, his syllables unsettled. You rip off your helmet and Steve turns to you as if he’s seen a ghost.

“Y/N?” He repeats again, this time far more quietly, the words all but disappearing on the smoke-burnt wind.

Steve starts to reach out a grimy hand to you, but one of the TVA agents surges up behind him, jamming a syringe in his neck and knocking him out cold. Cuffs are tightened around his wrists moments later, and Mobius conjures up the requisite Timedoor straight to a holding cell back in the TVA. Everyone starts filing away, but takes you a few more moments to gather yourself together long enough to follow them.

Once back in the halls of the TVA, lights buzzing cheerfully overhead, Loki turns to you at last. “The move with the helmet was risky,” he chastises.

You can’t focus on the rebuke. “He knew me,” you whisper. “He knew me, and he stopped fighting.”

Loki’s lips thin. “That’s not Steve,” he says. “Not the one you know, at least.”

You steal a glance towards the locked door of the cell anyway. “I have to talk to him.”

Loki’s expression shifts from frustrated to simply tired. “I know.”

Still, you’re not blind to the wishes of the TVA, and you let Mobius go in to talk to Steve first. You decide it’s probably best if you’re not the first face he sees, and if you’re not going, Loki would be an even worse choice, so it’s Mobius alone in there with a few guards for security. He barely makes it ten minutes before he comes storming out again, though, obviously frustrated.

You could hear shouting outside the cell and down the hall, but still, you’re curious enough to ask Mobius, “What happened in there?”

Mobius drags an irritated hand through his hair. “Your little hero isn’t really the talking type.”

You frown. “That’s unlike him.”

“All of this is unlike him,” Loki intercedes. “You really couldn’t get through to him, Mobius? That’s startling. Surely there’s some sort of homegrown charm you could pull on him to twist his mind in your favor.”

“That’s just called manners,” Mobius frowns, “but no, I tried. He refuses to talk to anyone but Y/N.”

Loki swings around to stare at you curiously. “Fascinating. He left you and now he won’t even indulge in a friendly conversation with the authorities. What sort of Captain Rogers is this?”

You roll your eyes to hide your growing discomfort. “Forget that. Are we going to give in so fast? Don’t tell me you’re the type to give up on interrogating a suspect after less than half an hour.”

Mobius shrugs. “We might as well let you in. Might learn something, he doesn’t seem inclined to give us anything else otherwise. Why waste more time?”

You might argue a little harder were it not for the fact that you’ve been dying to see Steve since he got here. Before that, really. You’ve been wanting to talk to him since he left you in the first place. Maybe it’s not the best strategy for dealing with a variant, but in your heart, he’s still Steve, and always will be.

Steve’s head is down when you enter the cell, but it flies up the second you take a seat opposite him. He’s sitting down, hands cuffed behind him, but you have no doubt that he could free himself in a heartbeat if he tried.

Still, he isn’t trying. He’s just looking at you, eyes wide, mouth a little agape, as if he really can’t believe it’s you even after demanding to meet. “Y/N?” He asks quietly.

You nod. “Steve.”

Your voice seems harsh in the hollow stillness of the TVA cell. Steve doesn’t flinch, but he might as well; his eyes gain a thin veneer of hurt you’ve known since the forties.

“You’re not my Y/N, though,” he decides. “You know, I never really believed in the whole multiverse thing. Strange tried to explain it to me after Thanos, but I just thought it was a bunch of crap. No way there were a million versions of us. But I’ve met enough of you and me to know otherwise now.”

Your heart feels heavy in your chest. “You’re referring to all of the universes you hijacked.”

“Hijacked,” Steve muses. “That’s a strong word.”

You fold your arms across your chest. “You entered universes that were not your own and caused chains of events that led to destruction of that world, every single time.”

It horrified you, looking at the footage. Every single universe was the same: heroes gone or killed, skies full of smoke, thousands of dead. Everywhere Steve went, chaos followed him. It felt impossible, but it was true. Shockingly, awfully, it was true.

Steve’s eyes go dark. “That wasn’t my intention.”

“But it still happened,” you point out. “And you saw it happen but you kept going in more universes anyway. Why? Why didn’t you stop?”

Anger sparks in Steve like a match to gasoline. “I wasn’t trying to tear the universes apart, I was just trying to go back home,” he spits. “I couldn’t find the way back. I didn’t realize how delicate the multiverse was. Maybe that means you guys are bad at your job if a few detours can send the whole thing spiraling.”

The jab doesn’t even land, you’re too distracted by what he said before it. “You– you were trying to go back? Back where?”

A thundercloud of emotion passes over Steve’s face. “Back to the present,” he says softly.

He looks like he wants to keep talking, but he glances sharply back at you again and cuts himself off. “What does it matter to you, anyway? You’re just another version of you. What universe are you from, anyway? One where you leave instead of me?”

“I wouldn’t be too sure of that,” you whisper. “You have no idea who I am, Steve.”

He laughs bitterly and shakes his head. “No. No, I know you’re not my Y/N. My Y/N never would have agreed to go in the same room as me.”

He straightens up suddenly. “Say– you’ve seen all the endings of the timeline, right? Is there any– are there any universes where you forgive me? Where I’m able to go back?”

Your breath feels faint in your chest. “You want to know if you ever go back to the present?”

He nods. “Surely I could do it at least once. Don’t tell me it never happens. And if I do, don’t say you hate me for leaving.”

His face, suddenly pleading, makes you almost sick to your stomach. “I don’t know,” you whisper. “I never looked. I was too afraid that you would have left me for nothing.”

Steve draws back suddenly, looking at you with a fresh wave of curiosity. “You mean– Y/N. You’re the one I left? How did you get here?”

You nod. “I was lonely after you disappeared. I needed something to do. But Steve– I thought you would stay in the forties. Why would you ever go in the first place if you were just going to leave again?”

Steve looks stricken. “I thought I would like it better back then. I wanted to go home, but Y/N, I was wrong. The forties weren't home, you were. I realized it after a few months. Nothing felt right without you. I tried to go to our present day again, but it had been too long since I jumped and I couldn’t figure it out. I tried finding Strange, but of course he hadn’t been born yet, and I was sent into another universe instead of ours.”

You shake your head slowly. “I don’t understand. If you were trying to get back, why destroy all those universes?”

“I wasn’t trying to destroy them,” Steve says lowly, “I was trying to get you back. Only– you’re pivotal to all of this, and you don’t even get it. If the Avengers formed without us, they wouldn’t make the decisions needed to stop the Chitauri, or save the world from Thanos, or anything.”

You comprehend it all at last. “You weren’t destroying the multiverse, you were meddling with the timeline. Of course. The TVA always insisted on the danger of even the smallest variant. I get it now.”

“I made a mistake by leaving, Y/N,” Steve tells you. “I’m trying to make it right. Will you let me?”

And, looking at him in the low fluorescent lights of the TVA, you ask yourself if there’s still a place in your heart for the man you’ve known all your life. It’s been a long time since you saw him. It’ll be longer still before you forgive him for leaving in the first place. However, there’s not many people like you in this world or the next. You have Steve back at last. How could anyone not take a chance like that?

all tags list: @wordsarelife, @supervoldejaygent

142 notes · View notes