#Cracki Records

[elisedonut]

When will my husband (my voice)

Come back from the war (heal and let me speak without sounding like a frog)

[gyokujyn]

There was a war on. You take comfort where you can get it.

Marvel cinematic world and actors being indefensible aside, are we all just going to sit here and act like their swinger dynamics aren't happening

If you put these five souls on a graph and started red lining who's in a relationship with what and who's broke up with who and who had homoerotic relationships with who's dads you'd Pass Out

[peindreensamusant]

Art Longo record design - Cracki Records

[cemeteryangel725]

The Hook, a Good Omens 90s fic by CemeteryAngel725

Okay, I seem to be in my "cracky ideas turn into heartfelt stories" era. This AU started out as a challenge to myself to write a story based on Blues Traveler's "Hook," which is basically a nonsense song about pop music theory. But then it turned into this much bigger tale about the universal language of music, coming of age during the AIDS crisis, and learning to ask for what you want and to have the courage to hold onto it when you find it. I'm really happy with how this one turned out!

Summary:

Ever since they met at an exclusive college for musicians twelve years ago, Aziraphale Eastgate and Anthony Crowley have had each other's backs. Sure, Aziraphale is a small-town organist and choir director composing hymns and Mass settings on the side, while Crowley is a Grammy-winning songwriter and record producer, but when they get together in front of a piano, it's undeniable that magic happens. So when Crowley gets stuck writing the music for a brand-new boy band, it's natural that he calls Aziraphale for help. And Aziraphale is more than happy to be there for him.

All he has to do is conceal what a smoking crater his life has become. Oh, and make sure Crowley never finds out just how much Aziraphale loves him.

Excerpt:

Aziraphale tutted. “You poor thing.”

“It sucks, Angel. It fucking sucks,” Crowley moaned. “Every time I sit down at the piano, my mind just goes blank. I don’t know how to write — ugh, that kind of music.”

Aziraphale frowned, looking down at the photograph and lightly tracing the outline of the blue-eyed boy with his fingertip. He really was strangely magnetic. “You usually don’t have a problem writing for different artists. I’ve seen you manage a number of styles quite well. What is it about this one?”

“Ugh, I don’t know. It’s all —” And here he made a series of exaggerated hand gestures, sweeping his open palms out to either side with a moony sigh before folding them over his heart, and then extending one hand to Aziraphale, fluttering his eyelashes. Then, his face collapsed into a scowl.

“Too sentimental?” Aziraphale guessed with a laugh.

“Too fucking corny,” Crowley growled.

Read more on AO3!

[deerlino]

Hiya, I adore your fics, they are so amazing and sweet! ❤️‍🩹 Could I request a fic?? Could you do producer! F! Reader x han? Like they're in a secret relationship and they get caught?? 😂 Could you please make it slightly cracky but also extremely fluffy??

caught in the mix.

han jisung x fem!reader / you and jisung are both producers at the same company, secretly dating. but your cover gets blown, and everyone finds out about your relationship.

additional tags / producer!jisung x producer!reader, (domestic) fluff, secret relationship, getting caught, canon compliant, workplace romance, established relationship, humor, crack, teasing & banter — 773 words in total.

content warnings / mild swearing, kissing (soft kisses, kisses on the neck, some intense moments of kissing)

authors note @ 15092000volcano / this was super cute to write! <3 i haven't done many jisung fics, so i was really excited to get this request. 😋 plus, i’m obsessed with the producer trope right now, so it was the perfect way to spend my sunday evening. thanks, anon, for the sweet request and the kind words about my work—it means a lot! hope you love the fic! 💓

You’re in a dimly lit recording studio, hidden away from the prying eyes of the world. The place is familiar, almost like a second home, except for one crucial detail: this is where you and Jisung have been sneaking off to. You glance over at him as he tinkers with the mixing board, his face illuminated by the soft glow of the computer screen. He catches your eye and shoots you a quick wink, causing your heart to skip a beat.

“Hey, love,” he murmurs, his voice low and teasing. “Pass me the headphones?”

You slide them over, your fingers brushing against his for a fleeting moment. The touch sends a shiver down your spine, and you wonder how long you can keep this secret from the rest of the team. It’s not that you want to hide your relationship, but you know how chaotic things can get with everyone involved.

Suddenly, the door bursts open, and Chan strides in, his usual confident swagger in place. He freezes mid-step when he sees you and Jisung huddled together.

“Uh, am I interrupting something?” he asks, eyebrow raised.

You both jump apart like you’ve been electrocuted, and Jisung clears his throat awkwardly. “Nope, just, uh, working on a new track.”

Chan’s eyes narrow, a knowing smirk tugging at his lips. “Right. Working. Sure.” He gives you a pointed look before sauntering out, leaving you both in a flustered silence.

“Well, that was close,” you mutter, trying to steady your racing heart.

Jisung chuckles, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “Don’t worry, babe. We just need to be more careful.”

The next day, you’re in the kitchen, trying to make coffee without waking up the whole house. Jisung sneaks up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. You lean into his touch, a content sigh escaping your lips.

“Morning,” he whispers, pressing a soft kiss to your neck.

“Morning,” you reply, turning to kiss him properly.

Just as your lips meet, the door swings open again. This time, it’s Felix, his hair a mess and his eyes half-closed. He stops dead in his tracks, blinking rapidly as if he’s not sure he’s really seeing this.

“Oh my God,” Felix says, his voice a mixture of disbelief and amusement. “Are you two...?”

You and Jisung spring apart again, but it’s too late. Felix is already grinning like the Cheshire cat. “This is gold. I can’t wait to tell the others.”

“Felix, no!” you plead, but he’s already out the door, cackling.

Later, you’re sitting in the living room, pretending to watch TV, but your mind is elsewhere. Jisung is next to you, his hand discreetly resting on your thigh. You’re trying to act natural when Seungmin strolls in, phone in hand.

He takes one look at you two and snorts. “You guys are terrible at hiding this, you know?”

Jisung tries to play it cool. “Hiding what?”

Seungmin rolls his eyes. “Please, I’ve seen more subtlety in a sledgehammer. Just be glad it’s me and not someone with a camera.”

Your face heats up, and you bury it in Jisung’s shoulder, mumbling something about how you’re trying your best. Jisung just laughs, pulling you closer.

As the day goes on, you and Jisung keep getting caught. Jeongin walks in on you sharing a secret kiss in the hallway and immediately turns on his heel, muttering about how he didn’t need to see that. Hyunjin catches you holding hands under the table and just smirks, giving you a knowing look. Even Minho, who’s usually oblivious to everything, notices the way you and Jisung look at each other and shakes his head with a sigh.

Finally, the inevitable happens. You’re in the studio again, thinking you’re safe. Jisung has you pressed against the wall, his lips on yours, when the door flies open. This time, it’s everyone—all of them, standing there with various expressions of shock, amusement, and exasperation.

“Seriously?” Chan groans, rubbing his temples. “Can you two not keep it in your pants for one minute?”

Felix is laughing so hard he’s doubled over, while Hyunjin and Jeongin exchange high-fives. Seungmin just looks resigned, and Minho’s smirk is wider than ever.

You and Jisung separate, both of you blushing furiously. “Well,” you say, trying to salvage some dignity. “Surprise?”

“Yeah, no shit,” Chan says, but he’s smiling now. “Just... next time, maybe lock the door?”

Jisung chuckles, pulling you into his side. “Noted, boss.”

As everyone piles into the room, the teasing starts in earnest. You feel a warmth spreading through you, knowing that even though you’ve been caught, you’re surrounded by people who care about you.

© deerlino (est. 100624) ༯ heyo, did you enjoy this piece? if you did, maybe you could reblog, drop a comment, or shoot me an ask to let me know your thoughts. also, feel free to check out my other stuff! thanks a bunch for the support! <3

[shadowmaat]

Fox's Wonderful Day (redux)

Corrie Week, Day 7: Free Space Fox Day

I'm going to be incredibly self-indulgent by reviving and expanding a cracky thing I wrote a few years ago.

-

It was Race Night in the lower levels, and Fox had deployed extra teams to keep watch in hopes of finally catching a break.

He hated Race Nights. Or, more specifically, he hated that the illegal podracing circuit seemed to have no regard for the safety of those around them.

It was one thing to put your own life in danger with stupid stunts and souped-up racers, but to put ordinary citizens at risk with dangerous speeds, illegal maneuvers, and no regard for public or personal property. Race Nights always saw an increase in injury reports and property damage. And, of course, there were all the connections between the racing circuit and some of the most unsavory criminal organizations on Coruscant. Fox was sick of it.

They were rarely able to net any leads, but this time, somehow, they caught a big one.

Nika Skye was one of the kings of the raceway. And one of the most dangerously reckless ones. Fox had a list of all the crimes that could be laid at Skye's feet. Even if he was never caught, even if none of the charges stuck, Fox still wanted that proof.

"Fox! Sir! I got 'im!"

Hound's voice crackled over the comm, followed by a vid clip of Skye arm-in-arm with a beautifully-dressed woman. Far too beautiful to be safe in that neighborhood.

Skye turned his head to smile at his girlfriend just as the lights of a passing speeder framed them.

Fox stared. He played back the clip. He played it again. He paused it just as the light fully revealed Skye's face. He grinned.

"Stay on them, Hound," he ordered. "Do NOT lose them! I'm on my way to you right now!"

He was already running out the door. Guardsmen flattened themselves against the wall as he passed, and he knew they'd be worried to see their Commander running, but explanations could wait. This was too big, too important for decorum.

Hound kept him updated as be broke a few speed rules of his own in order to catch up.

"Uh... sir?"

Dread curled in Fox's stomach at the Trooper's sudden reluctant tone.

"You didn't lose them, did you?"

"Oh, no sir," Hound reassured him. "It's just, uh... they've gone into the Nookie Nook."

Fox's grin grew even wider as he swung around a final turn, using signals and staying aware of everything and everyone around him.

The "Nookie Nook" was the unofficial name for one of the small, public gardens that were scattered through this sector of Coruscant. It was in slightly better shape than most and provided a little shelter for those seeking to get high... or those seeking a different kind of thrill.

The most important part of it was that it was a public garden. Coruscant had laws against public indecency. Very minor ones, for the most part, and as long as everything was consensual, the Guard was willing to turn a blind eye to a little bit of public sex, but not this time.

There was nowhere to park, of course, so Fox simply found an out-of-the-way spot, parked, and put his Guard placard in the window.

Hound was standing with his back to the entrance of the Nook, fidgeting. Grizzer sat beside him, but stood to wag her tail as Fox approached.

"They still in there?"

Grunts and moans answered him before Hound could.

"...Yessir."

"Don't worry, Hound, I've got this."

The tiniest of giggles escaped him. Hound froze.

"Uh? Are you- I mean, yessir!"

He stepped out of the way. Fox gave him a reassuring pat and moved in. He made sure his helmet was recording- for evidence- and then hit the lights on his helmet.

"Coruscant Guard! Come out with your hands up!"

Screaming. Swearing. The desperate rustle of clothing and displaced foliage.

"Go away!" an all-too-familiar voice snarled. "This is none of your business!"

"Public indecency is very much my business, sir." Fox struggled to keep his tone calm and bored. "Now, step out and prepare to be arrested!"

There was more arguing, of course, but eventually the couple stepped into full, inescapable view.

Anakin Skywalker looked furious and ready to strangle him. His girlfriend, Senator Amidala, at least had the decency to look mortified, trying to shield her face with one hand while the other kept her dress held in place.

"You can't do this to us!" Skywalker growled. "Do you know who I am?"

"Nika Skye," Fox answered. "Street racer responsible for multiple accidents, injuries, and property damage."

Nika Skye. Of all the stupid, ham-fisted aliases he could have picked... but then Fox hadn't really thought about it himself until he got a good look at him. The promo images and candids always showed him in his racing helmet. Ha. Apparently even an idiot could learn a thing or two from his betters. Wait til Rex found out.

Skywalker blinked, appearing caught off guard.

"Well, yeah! That!" he said. "Except I never hurt anyone! I'm just an ordinary citizen, enjoying a night out with my wife."

"We're so sorry for the trouble, Commander," Amidala said, voice dripping professional sincerity. "It won't happen again, I promise. If you'll just let us go-"

"I'm afraid I can't do that, ma'am," Fox said. He hoped the Jedi couldn't sense his glee. "Public indecency is a crime on Coruscant. And there's also the matter of Mr. Skye's multiple traffic violations, involvement in an illegal racing ring with ties to the Black Sun Syndicate-"

Amidala gasped. Skywalker just looked annoyed.

"-as well as damaged property, speeders, and personal injuries related to those traffic violations. Once we're back at the station, you'll be allowed to call an attorney."

"You won't take us in."

There was a pressure to Skywalker's words, an urge to obey, but Fox ignored it.

"We can also provide an attorney for you, if you don't have one of your own," he concluded. He was willing to bet that Amidala, at least, had a whole fleet of lawyers at her beck and call, and he knew the Jedi had some of their own as well.

"Did you hear me?" Skywalker's glare intensified. "I said you won't-"

"Come with us, sir. Quietly," Fox told him. "Resisting arrest will only make things worse." He reached for the binders on his belt.

"Ani." Amidala placed a hand on her boyfriend's arm, but he shook it off, still glaring.

"You'll regret this, Commander," he said. "I'll have your job for this."

Fox rolled his eyes. "Good luck with that, sir. I've been trying to get out of it since the war started."

He did, in fact, get to put binders on Skywalker, citing him as a flight risk. It was one of the greatest moments of his life.

Hound and Grizzer provided backup as they made their way back to the speeder.

"Are you sure about this, Fox?" Hound asked, as they headed back to headquarters. He'd twigged to Skye's true identity as well. "We could get in a lot of trouble for this."

"The Jedi aren't above the law," Fox told him. "And that goes double for Skywalker. Arrogant little shit has been a vibroblade in my side for too long. Flaunting the laws. Acting like he's better than us. Taking advantage of his 'friendship' with the Chancellor to make everything better for himself with no regard for anyone else-"

"Yeah, okay, I know," Hound interrupted. He shifted on the passenger seat, Grizzer in his lap. "But this is gonna bring in the Jedi-"

"I'm counting on that."

"And probably the Chancellor. Like you said, they're friends."

Fox paused. That was a big concern, and the only dark spot in this otherwise wonderful day.

"I'll handle it," he said. He was not giving up this chance for a little payback.

-

Skywalker's story changed as soon as they were in the Processing Room.

"Look, Commander, you really don't want to do this," he said. "I know the Guard doesn't see a lot of action here on Coruscant-"

The thunderous whoosh of indrawn breaths from the listening Guards drowned out his next words.

"...Anakin Skywalker."

Fox refused to rise to the insult Skywalker had carelessly flung at the Guard. Chances were he actually believed what he said.

"And yet your ID says you're Nika Skye."

That earned him another scowl. "Are we really going to play this game, Fox? I know you can't be that stupid."

Fox muted the general chatter feed. Guard opinion of Skywalker was mixed, but mostly positive bordering on indifferent. That was being revised downward fast.

"Lieutenant Rattle, add possession of false ID and lying to an officer of the law to the list of charges," Fox said.

"Mmm," Rattle murmured. Her hands shook more than usual as she added the charges.

"I OUTRANK YOU!" Skywalker roared, making everyone flinch.

Amidala, who'd been on a comm call, turned to look at him.

"It's okay, Ani, I'm handling it," she said.

"You may outrank me, General, but you don't outrank the law." Fox had taken an involuntary half-step back at Skywalker's outburst.

Skywalker closed his eyes and took a deep breath in an apparent effort to calm himself. When he looked at Fox again, his eyes were still bright with rage, but a smile was plastered across his face.

"At least let Pad- Senator Amidala go," he said. "She's an innocent in all of this."

Fox arched a brow, not that Skywalker could see it. Amidala was many things, but innocent wasn't one of them. She was in deep with Skywalker and his schemes, and was probably one of the reasons they hadn't caught him until now.

Still. She was a Senator, and that would be a whole political mess of its own. He tilted his helmet.

"She'll stay here until her security team arrives and then reassess," he said.

Skywalker huffed, rolling his eyes. "Finally! Some sense! I guess I'm so used to Rex-"

"Who's your emergency contact?" Fox interrupted.

"My what?" Skywalker's frown seemed more confused than angry this time.

"Who should we call at the Temple to alert them to your circumstances?"

It was like flipping a switch. Gone was Skywalker's arrogance and bluster. It was replaced with fear and anxiety.

"Oh, uh, that- that won't be necessary, right?"

He was looking anywhere but at Fox. Interesting.

"It's- it's High General Kenobi, sir," Rattle supplied.

Skywalker flinched. "Here?! He can't be! He's supposed to be in a meeting with the High Council!"

Fox's grin returned.

"Thanks, Rattle. I'll be sure to give him a call and let him know his former Padawan is safe."

And wouldn't that be a fun call. In a meeting with the other High Generals? And Fox could interrupt? The day kept getting better and better.

"Wait! No!"

"Burke, Boot, please escort General Skywalker to holding," he said. "We wouldn't want anything to happen to him before General Kenobi gets here."

"Sir!" They said in tandem, moving to herd the suddenly worried Skywalker to the cells.

"Commander Fox," Amidala said, holding the comm to her chest as she spoke. "I know we've caused unbearable upset for you and your Guard, but-"

"Senator Amidala, ma'am," he said. "You're free to leave once your security detail arrives. What you do to help your 'husband' after that is your business."

The already pale Amidala went chalk-white at his words. About the security detail? Or- shit. He'd thought Skywalker was bluffing about the wife thing. The Storms had truly blessed him on this day.

"Please," Amidala whispered, her eyes wide. "You can't tell-"

"If you'll excuse me, ma'am, I have a lot of work to do. Have a good night."

He dipped his head in acknowledgement and headed back to his office. There was so much to do and all of it was good. If there was a slight skip in his step as he walked, well, no one would believe it.

[theyhavetakenovermylife]

Is It On? (18+)

Bayverse!Michelangelo x reader

A short fun one, and to step further into my smut writing.

Your friend did this to her boyfriend, and now you do it to Mikey. Enjoy!🧡

Warnings: Cracky smut, spelling.

—-----------------------------------------

You had wanted to do it, ever since your friend told you about it on a girls night out. It was a hilarious and absolutely amazing idea. And you were pretty sure Michelangelo would think so too. And you were pretty sure that your fun loving boyfriend would have an even better reaction than the one of your friends.

When you got down to the lair, you didn’t tell Mikey much other than you wanted to try something. Your orange clad boyfriend had looked questionable at you. He was sitting on the floor in the lair, in the middle of a very important video game, and you wanted to try something out that couldn’t wait until later.

“But baby! I’m about to break my record!”, he wailed, tapping away on his controller.

“But Mikeeey”, you wailed back biting back a smile. “I really want to do this”.

“But what is it?”, he laughed back, finding your begging somewhat adorable.

“I can’t tell you”, you whispered leaning against his shoulder while holding onto his bicep.

“Why not?”, he asked, flexing his bicep a little just to tease.

“Because I just can’t”, you said, before leaning closer to where his ear would be. “Not here”.

That was the moment Mikey caught on. He looked from you to his brother that were all doing their own things around the lair.

“Okay”, Mikey smiled a little smugly, turning his video game off. “Where then?”

“I don’t know”, you said as you began tracing his muscles with your fingers, looking at him through your lashes. “Your bedroom maybe?”

Oh, Mikey liked where this was going.

He leaned in closer to you, his face mere centimeters from yours. “Will you tell me in my bedroom?”

“Maybe”, you said, hugging onto his arm. “Or maybe I’ll show you in there”.

Mikey was on. He absolutely loved when you were being needy for him like that. Acting innocent, as if telling him out loud what you wanted would cause something bad to happen.

He let you lead the way, but not without grabbing your ass a few times along the way, causing you to yelp. It wasn’t his fault that you sounded so amazing when you did that. And with an ass like that, you couldn’t expect him not to. He loved your body and every sound you would make, so obviously he would enjoy himself with both.

As soon as both of you were inside of Mikey’s room, your boyfriend was quick to lock the door. If you were going to try something new with him, he definitely wouldn’t let anybody interrupt you.

You almost didn’t have time to turn towards your boyfriend, before his lips were on your mouth and his hands were sneaking around your waist, to grab your ass and pull you close. You laughed into the kiss, just Mikey turned his head further to the right, causing the two of you to deepen the kiss. One of your hands found their way around Mikey’s neck, while the other rested on his platron. Mikey moved one hand from your ass to your face, before letting it sneak into your hair. He gave your hair a slight tug, causing you to let out a small gasp. Mikey used this as an opportunity to let his tongue creep into your mouth, causing you to laugh slightly again.

Your make out session continued for a short while, before the two of you pulled back for air. Mikey leaned his forehead against yours, before letting his hands pull at the bottom of your shirt.

“So, what did you want to try, angelcakes?” You bit your lip, before pulling Mikey with you towards the bed. You motioned for him to sit down, which he did happily, watching you with his blown out pupils.

He watched as you got down on your knees between his legs, before putting your hair with a hair tie you had around your wrist. Mikey's eyes started lighting up in realization. You had given Mikey blowjobs several times before, and each time Mikey had enjoyed them thoroughly. So Mikey could only dream of what you wanted to try, and how amazing it would feel.

Mikey leaned back, as you started to kiss over the waistline of his pants, low churring erupting from his chest. His breathing became heavier as you slowly started pulling down his pants and underwear, his erection springing free from its confines. You couldn’t help but giggle. Mikey had always been prone to drop quickly, causing you to feel a boost of pride each and every time.

You started to kiss the area around his erection, causing Mikey to slip out a breathy moan.

“Fuck yeah angelcakes, you know what to do”, Mikey breathed out with a lazy smile, watching closely as you lightly took his shaft in your right hand. “You always know what to do”.

Before Mikey even registered that you in fact didn’t take his penis into your mouth, you gave his head a few times soft taps with your other hand, causing Mikey to jolt a bit, before speaking into it like a mic.

“Hello? Is it on?”

It didn’t take long for Michelangelo to realize what you had just said and done. He fell back, holding his stomach in laughter.

After regaining his senses, Mikey sat back up to look at you, with tears of laughter in his eyes.

“Was that what you wanted to try?”

“Yes”, you nodded laughing, still holding your boyfriend's hard dick in your hand.

“Oh my god”, Mikey laughed. “My girlfriend is a comedic genius!”

“So, what do you think?”, you asked, stroking him ever so slightly.

Mikey’s breathing became heavy once more, his low churr vibrating from his chest as a smug smile grew on his lips once more. “I think you should drop that shirt and start sucking my dick before I start fucking you like I’m in heat”.

Well, it’s fair to say that your idea worked on Mikey like a charm.

[devouringbodies]

Hiiii I was wondering if you have a fic rec list 👉🏻👈🏻

Omg hi!!! I just went through my bookmarks and found some of my favorites!! Literally I had the hardest time narrowing down, I've got so many I love, also some I can't remember the Exact plot of that I'm sure I absolutely love and have just forgotten. So I definitely have more up my sleeve if anyone wants more. Head the tags for some of these.

The Enticement of Suffering by jonnimir - latest fic I just read, gory and sexy wound fucking coda to dolce. if you're into that it's SO GOOD

Not Quite Charity by @stranded-labyrinth - au first meeting between Will and Hannibal, hannibal leaves his car in a run down area of Baltimore and will, who's homeless, heckles him about it and Hannibal decides to pay him to watch it for him. I love this will sm!! It's a really interesting look at their dynamic, and is super in character and just a fun au study!!

Perda de memória by bleakmidwinter - amnesia!hannibal post fall fic. I'm actually a sucker for amnesia aus and love the angst in this. It adds an element to Will's struggle and decision making that makes his mindset post fall all the more interesting. And I love how much hannibal is still hannibal despite not remembering hardly anything.

Everything casts a shadow by @ghostforwhat - i looooove season 2 Will killing more people. I can't ever get enough of it. It's written so well and believably here, and the way it changes the course of the season is super fascinating. Currently a wip.

Wolf and I by t_pock - so so sooo fucking good. One of my favorites. It also has a Podfic as well and I love Podfics soo much and relisten to it often. Season 1 au that has more elements of horror, creepiness, symbolism and hands down the best, hottest, wildest forest chase sequence I've ever read. This fic feels more like a folk or fairy tale it's so good, especially paired with the beautiful art the podficer made, as well as the music they paired with the Podfic. Can't recommend this one enough.

A night off the record by barcharonte - season 1 au again, where on the way to Minnesota hannibal and will get snowed in and have to take shelter somewhere. Will is still losing time and hallucinating. Hannibal still tries to take advantage of course. Fun times to be had.

Between ease and foresight by devotional_doldrums - season 1 au (can you tell I like these? Lol) where wills and Hannibal's metaphorical conversations get a little too on the nose and Will finds out. SUPER good hannibal pov, I want to eat parts of this fic the writing is so good, and the author's notes are hilarious.

Sings to me nightly, sings to me brightly by serindrana - psychic connection phone sex what more could you want!!

The joy of creation by fkahersweetness - super dark mute!will post fall. I wouldn't say I think this is Actually how a post fall dynamic would be but in the universe of this fic it's so so sooo amazing. I love the surreality and implied shared visions/psychosis connection that will and Hannibal have here. Also the ending layed me tf out for days.

Radon and its daughters by @chaparral-crown - best most believable and realistic abo au ever. Nuff said.

Speaking of abo the one where Will smells like blood to hannibal, so good. I'll probably survive this by saintsavage

Pochée by ellopoppet - season 1 au! Also with a Podfic, Will's away on a case but is still getting closer to hannibal through texts and calls.

Mon chéri by sandyquinn - cracky Addams family au esque one shot. Just super cute and silly. I'm picky about my cute and silly but the Addams family morbidity fits comedy hannigram to a T.

Never let it starve by northern - another Will finds out in season 1, I truly can't get enough of these. Also bonus bug boy will!!!

Let the river rush in by several - Explores an actual psychic connection between the boys, again I'm a huge fan of this trope.

Hyacinth house by bluesyturtle - MY BELOVED!!!! One of my top top faves, season 1 au, cool cases, great relationship dynamic between the boys, and im obsessed with how this fic portrays Will's empathy and how it plays with his gender a bit. Love the story, love the ending. Also with Podfic!

Pattern break by thisbeautifuldrowning - dark Will au season 2 where he doesn't plot with Jack or go back to the fbi and deals with Hannibal himself. LOVE how this one plays out.

Bloodline by xzombiezkittenx - VAMPIRE AU MY LOVEEEEE this fic is an utter joy if you like vamp aus. The world building is great.

A consequence of consumption by ironlotus - straight up hands down my favorite fic in the fandom I think. It's still a wip, but it's one of the best characterizations, writing, plot, and just perfect outstanding everything I've seen in this fandom. It's an au where before all the events of season 1, Will is kidnapped by Eldon stamments and is kept alive and rescued eventually. It's peak "Will's milkshake brings all the serial killers to the yard" trope and the way everything is woven together, the storylines and character motivations, is just crazy good. Also one of my most favorite hannibal pov and characterizations out there.

Ok that was still a lot, I'm sorry if I missed tagging anyone, and hopefully the links all work!

[abybweisse]

The fire, revisited

I have a crack theory that might not be too cracky.

Previously, I'd thought the fire at Phantomhive Manor was started by either the attackers (and/or John Brown) or by Tanaka (on Vincent's standing orders, in case something like this happened to him).

Well, I'd be surprised if Tanaka somehow managed to do that, considering he'd fallen from that stab wound to the back. Either John Brown or the other attackers on his/the queen's orders is still a good possibility. Particularly since I expect that John and the queen already know by then that Undertaker is a reaper.

But there's another possibility I'd never really talked about before: the reapers who came to collect all those souls. I was thinking of this during discussions about ch209, because this new reaper states there're no additional comments to make about Snake's death, even though he's in a space underground where there are body parts stored, blood transfusion equipment, and a bizarre doll who is actually Snake's killer.

You'd think he'd at least mention the odd circumstances of Snake's death, especially when there's a hunt for Undertaker and his latest bizarre dolls. I don't think this reaper is completely oblivious to what's going on; it seems to me he might be trying to actively cover up what's happening, so he's not including such details in the official documentation. It could be for selfish reasons (to avoid overtime), or it could be based on special orders he's been given.

I say that because for a long time, the reapers weren't talking about Undertaker, and Grelle didn't even know about Undertaker's past as 136649. Othello knows because he was there and he was trained with 136649. But if he's a "fugitive of legend", why aren't reapers like Grelle and Ronald aware of his history? William has been at least somewhat aware of him for a while... but he's in management. The "superiors" are finally getting reapers in collections involved with this ongoing case against Undertaker, and I suspect it's only out of necessity. If they could, they would keep the vast majority of the reapers in the dark about this deserter.

Because they consider him to be that much of a threat to their organization. For quite some time, I've thought he knows something (bad) about the organization itself, and if he spread that knowledge around to the reaper masses, there could be an uprising. We've seen it with the maids turning against Heathfield, Ada and the patients turning against the Aurora Society, and now with the top students against the orphanage. When people realize they are being controlled and harmed for someone else's benefit, they tend to rise up, and I think that's what could happen if enough of the reapers learn whatever Undertaker knows.

The "superiors" finally got serious about it, according to Othello, when they sent him from his lab to the human realm. They seem to have hoped he could make this problem go away by talking to the deserter, destroying him, or capturing him. But once Othello realized it really was him, of all reapers, he knew he couldn't handle the situation on his own... and that he and Grelle wouldn't be enough, either. That's why he sent the dove for backup.

But I think someone else in the reaper organization already knew Undertaker was involved and tried to stop him without properly documenting anything -- they tried to cover up his activities. The night of the attack, one or two reapers were sent to collect souls from the dying, as per usual. While looking through their cinematic records, the reapers saw occasional instances of Undertaker showing up in them, but the most instances would have been in Vincent's records.

Vincent's records would have had extensive chunks of memories involving Undertaker, and the information in those records (things they said to each other) could have been damning somehow. To the organization, at least. What if Undertaker admitted to being Vincent's father? What if he told Vincent secrets he knew about the reaper organization? What if he mentioned the experiments he'd already been conducting on cinematic records and corpses?

Any reaper reviewing such records might think the best thing to do is destroy all this evidence, which might hopefully destroy the information, too. Why would a reaper destroy evidence about the organization's activities, if that information could help spawn a revolution? Too much of a hassle? Doesn't understand the full implications? On someone else's orders? Perhaps the reapers sent to collect these souls were specifically told to burn Vincent's body and the manor, and those reapers did as they were told, regardless of the circumstances. I wonder what happened to any reaper who saw whatever they saw in those cinematic records.... 🤔

Whoever ordered the fire to be started, or whoever decided to start it... they did so to destroy evidence.

As well as to keep Undertaker from collecting Vincent's body and cinematic records. Because whoever this person is, they know Undertaker would have found those things useful. And they didn't want him to have access.

The end result is pretty much the same, except that now I think reapers might have actually done it, instead of attackers/John or Tanaka.

[ectogeo-rebubbles]

fanfic end of year asks!

a fic you didn’t expect to write

something you learned this year

fic(s) you completed this year

fics you’ll continue next year

Thanks for the ask! ^_^ (For this ask game.)

14. a fic you didn’t expect to write

speech is silver, silence is golden, lmao. I really truly did not expect to write Garak/Morn smut. But when my friend requested it, I knew exactly how to write it lol. <3

15. something you learned this year

I may have already learned this, but exchanges with delayed fic reveals and then author reveals a week or so after that are BRUTAL on me, and I may (or may not) just avoid them from now on hahaha. The usual fic-posting waiting-for-comments anxiety but drawn out over a muuuuuch longer time period (finish the fic before the deadline to submit, wait a million years for it to even get revealed anonymously, then wait another whole week before I can even link to it on my blog...).

16. fic(s) you completed this year

27 fics finished this year!! Wooooo! (...And I may update this post later if I post any more hehe.)

completed fics posted:

the looking-glass war (Past Prologue Sisko POV, background Garashir)

and if you don't love me now, you will never love me again (Garashir, Broken Link getting together fic)

lockstitch (Sloanshir, embroidery as torture, sometime post-IAESL)

partners in crime (Siskarak, post-ITPM smut)

kiss me hard before you go (Garashir, Extreme Measures getting together fic)

Unlikely Weapon (Garashir, Julian killing Sloan = Garashir getting together scenario lol)

a contract is a contract is a contract (Quark/Brunt smut set during Body Parts)

me and the devil walking side by side (Siskarak smut about devotion and corruption and recognition of the self in the other and all that good stuff)

you're a criminal as long as you're mine (Siskarak smut set during Second Skin, about crossing and setting boundaries, and the homoerotic relationship between a weapon and its wielder)

speech is silver, silence is golden (Garak/Morn smut with pre-Garashir feels. Garak obvs gags Morn during the sex lol.)

every breath you take (Sloan records Garashir having sex)

going up, going down (cracky Siskarak smut, blowjob in the turbolift during ITPM)

A Professional Interest (augmentphobic Sloan interrogates Julian)

Deserted (Garashir stranded on a desert planet)

touch (Garashir IPS/BIL missing scene multichapter fic)

fics for events/exchanges that had restricted word counts (250 words or 300 words):

gaslight gatekeep girlboss (Kira/Winn and Kira/Ziyal, exactly what the title says lol)

the pros and cons of being possessed (Kira/Keiko, argument about what happened to Kira in The Reckoning and what happened to Keiko in The Assignment)

feels so right (Jadzia/Kira, Kira's fun way of coping with her internalized homophobia)

both lips on the mirror (Intendant/Kira, mirror Kira is obsessed with her counterpart)

not unfaithful but I'll stray (Kirawinn, Strange Bedfellows)

chirality (Intendant/Kira smut, Crossover)

drabbles (100 words):

lying down with dogs (Siskarak smut)

i think we're alone now (Garashir, IPS/BIL cuddles)

The Descent (quodo, The Ascent smut)

never loved nobody fully (Disko, two alternate versions provided depending on which Cardassian you want Sisko to actually be into lol. also some amazing people made a podfic of this, which is just so cool!!!)

The Mole (Sloan vs Kukalaka >:3)

sunshine bouquet (Garashir fluff, DBIP)

aaaaand, not fics, but while I'm rounding everything up, here's links to the two amvs I finished this year too:

Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls - Garashir (tumblr, youtube)

meet me in the pale moonlight by Lola Violet (tumblr, youtube)

17. fics you’ll continue next year

Sleep Awake is my only partially posted wip, but I have many unposted wip documents that I intend to post next year (or whenever I finish them)! These include wips with document titles such as: siskarak strip poker, Sub Rosa sloanshir, soulmate sloanshir, aphrodisiac sloanshir, Inquisition in the Abscess 'verse, julian jealous of imagined siskarak, and garak jealous of imagined sloanshir. :) (P.S. - Anyone can always feel free to ask me about any of those and I will immediately go write/edit at least a sentence on it. Trick me into making incremental progress on my shit, please!)

[user-needs-new-hyperfixation]

Rare(ish)-pair Yuumori ideas that I may or may not ever write (but they're like, bottom of my ideas list, so if anyone is inspired by these have at it, I can always do my own versions later lol. Tag me tho, I wanna read stuff!)

(These are for the most part absurdly off-canon and varying degrees of cracky. Roll with it.)

Bond/Albert in which Albert is a virgin and Bond has never had sex post-transition. Bond tops. It's like a very affectionate friends-with-benefits deal where they're learning new things together.

Billy and Louis friendship fic where Louis expects to find Billy annoying because he's kind of boisterous and overly familiar and whatnot, but instead finds himself surprisingly charmed and then they're buddies.

Billy and Bond fic where they bond over being Americans who faked their deaths and changed their identities. They may or may not kiss, idk.

Jack Renfield/Queen Victoria 😂😂😂😂

Mycroft and Miss Hudson have an incredibly tame, mature, and vanilla romance that is absolutely fascinating to everyone around them because they're all crazy people (affectionate). They do gentle missionary for the first time on their wedding night and have a baby precisely forty weeks later and everyone claps.

Mycroft/Moran. Has anyone done this? I literally have no reason for it other than that I was playing around with the character profiles trying to see which people might actually have anything in common based on age etc, and huh. I could find a way to make this work. They never have sex beyond handies because they can't agree on who would top. 🤣

John and Moran fic. Probably just a friend fic. Frankly this should be considered more in general in Holmes adaptations: these two are foils of each other, each the loyal soldier at Holmes' and Moriarty's respective sides. They should be drinking buddies in the Yuumori-verse, but in everything else they should be enemies with belligerent sexual tension.

Mycroft/William set in between A Scandal in the British Empire and The Final Problem, in which they have a lot of technically very good but very miserable sex while pining over each other's brothers and picking apart each other's brains brutally.

William/Billy thing where William after the coma is still working things through and is kind of emotionally distancing himself from Sherlock because he's still not Okay, and Billy is there for him. (Vermissa gets pushed later in this.) They get quite emotionally entangled in bonding over their similarities, but nothing actually comes of it, and Billy is the one to ultimately give William the push he needs to open up to Sherlock. It ends on a bittersweet note with the implication that Billy is more than a little in love with Liam, but knows Sherlock is who he should be with. Sad gays.

Bond/everyone where he's at the center of the most successful polycule in recorded history. 😂

[chaoticly-shy-dragon]

Okay hear me out

Vader has this virus that deletes any and all files bearing his name. He essentially deletes himself from the Holonet

This is after rotj; he lives but isn't very fine with being put on trial - he might not be a Sith anymore but he sure as hell isn't spending the rest of his life in jail

Luke is exasperated but other than arguing with his father there is not much he can do.

The thing is - eveyone relevant know Vader is this tall horribly scarred man.

But they can't prove it.

There is nothing on Vader: Birth records for that name don't exist; all the paperwork signed in his name is suddenly either from Tarkin or Motti or even Piett (RIP).

The Alliance has footage of Vader on campaigns and missions but they can't exactly connect him with Anakin. The confronation goes something like this:

Someobody: See!! He exists!!!

Anakin: Sure he does.. Is this even unaltered footage? How can we know it isn't fake?

That poor person: We have proof! It's not altered!!!

Anakin: Okay... sure this person exists... but still. This isn't me

And when they ask Luke. Is Vader your father - he can't exactly say yes - because technically no he isn't - bc Vader isn't a person but a mask, but Luke can't exactly say that 'cause in the end his father has always been and will be Anakin Bloody Skywalker.

At this point Luke is having a lot of fun - he is entering his bastard years - also no prison can hold his father unless he wants to stay there. So this saves him the headache of capturing his dad for the fiftieth time just because he wanted to see that one podrace. If only Leia was on the same wavelength as him.

Obi-Wan in the afterlife is drinking to a point had he been alive he would have gotten alcohol poisoning.

Because see that's his apprentice. But also that's his apprentice.

There is a lot of blubbering and is very cracky - exactly my type of jam

[peindreensamusant]

Art Longo record design - Cracki Records

[zirconpetals]

For the ask me fandom edition: S P O N & E :)

Thank youuu!!! 🤭

S - Show us an example of your personal headcanon

Hmmmm

Ok. I think that when Bones and Jim met it was a very high stress situation and they were forced to trust each other with their lives, so they bonded very fast. (I don't even know why I think that or what that situation could be... Maybe it just feels they had to have been stuck together somehow to jumpstart their relationship)

Maybe they were on leave at the same time & something happened and they didn't even know they were both Starfleet. And maybe Jim shielded Bones from something and Bones had to put him together afterwards. And during that time they got to know each other better and actually become friends.

(Ok I know it all sounds really cheesey disregard this whole second paragraph the important part I think their friendship had developed relatively fast. (Idk what makes me think that. Genuinely) I suppose it also means it could have happened almost right before tos & they would still come off as close as they were. Maybe they'd never even met again before Bones got on the Enterprise. Though I do like to imagine them knowing each other for a long time)

O - Choose a song at random, which OTP does it remind you of

I already did one of those but there's a lot of songs

If I believed from Twisted. Idk if it counts if it's already a love song for specific characters. Great song though. It's a... very vulgar parodic musical so having something so earnest and genuine really pays off by contrast.

P - Invent a random AU for any fandom (we always need more ideas)

This is very silly but lately I've been daydreaming an au where the tos characters are tiny fairies and they fly around & boldly go exploring the world and it's all really cute 😖

And then I thought of an au with the fairies but specifically the Disney fairies, like the Tinker Bell movies, because there like in st everyone is dressed in the color of their job 🤔 Though some characters are easier to match up than the others. Spock would be a human in this one though.

N - Your favorite fanfiction or fanauthor

Oof that one. I don't know. I don't really think I have one. Plus I haven't really been reading as much fanfiction as I used to. I mean, maybe lately a bit more, especially with me trying to go through some vintage fics & zines & stuff but idk if I have a favourite. I do try to reblog the ones I like to my blog, though I probably should tag better.

E - Have you added anything stupid/cracky/hilarious to your fandom, if so, what

Something that became like fandom-wide lore? No, I don't think I have.

S - Show us an example of your personal headcanon

Decided to do an extra one just because 😇. Actually really wanted this one to be for Spones but couldn't really think of anything on the spot.

I'm not sure how Bones would feel about mind melds... When I'm daydreaming my little scenarios I like to imagine them melding, but really he doesn't have a good track record with them in canon. I don't think he got any kind of telepathic damage from the Mirror Mirror one. By telepathic damage I mean like... In some fics it's described as him having a bad physical reaction to subsequent melds, or just having a bad physical reaction, and then having to put everything in his mind in it's proper place again through melding with Spock/a healer (and I love those fics! not a criticism), but I don't think that happened. Actually I was reading one and thought "hey that kinda sounds more like what happened in tsfs", so now I'm thinking what if they did actually use to meld, but after the katra-sharing Bones had started to get a bad reaction to melds because that whole experience put a strain on his mind? Hmm maybe during those months they were stuck on Vulcan he had to go through some telepathic therapy about it, like what usually happens in post-Mirror Mirror fics. (Not really a headcanon I personally subscribe to, just an idea to think about)

[ewesless]

Barbatos....... the things I do for you.............. I need everything you are in.....

Lucifer is on level 23 and I want to get his level 30 call. For context, Lucifer is still on 28 in my now 3 year old OM game. Can I interest anyone in doing a trade for a recording/screenshots of that phone call? I can do recordings or screenshots or maybe write something cracky?

(I say as I have a folder full of drafts and unfinished projects. *Scoots them out of sight*)

[pilferingapples]

5, 6, and 7 for the asks? :D

5: something you see in fics a lot and love

I like it when Bahorel is either Definitely or Implicitly a werewolf but like. Offscreen. It doesn't even matter to the fic, it's just a passing fact about him, like if he had a big record collection or something. It always cracks me up.

...that I think this shows up in fics "a lot" may say a good deal about whose fics I read XD but they are good fics ! They've got Casually A Werewolf Bahorel!:D

6: something you see in art a lot and love

I like it generally when people play up the textual Symbolism as a visual element, and I specifically especially like it when Enjolras and Fantine get halos :D it's just fun!

7: your favorite tropes to read/write/draw

to read: I like when things get fantastical or cracky-- ghosts , time loops, body swaps, etc. ESPECIALLY ESPECIALLY if it's not in service of a romance, just Things Being Weird, that's fun for me:D

to write: I can't write. Alas!

to draw: oooh ooof IDK, I like drawing silly jokes!! I need to get back to that. I also like drawing various numbers of people jammed into way too little space :D

Thank you!