#Drop Dead Gorgeous (Mettaton) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

memoriashell · 6 years

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webs

Characters / Pairing: Muffet, some vague Mettaton / Muffet, some vague Undyne / Muffet, some Napstablook, and if you really squint you might see some Alphyne in the bg.

crossposted on ao3 ft. the full extent of my notes

Notes: Hi @roxrezi, I'm your secret santa! Since I quite love myself some Muffet, I thought I’d write something with her for you. I also really wanted to try writing some Undyne / Muffet and Mettaton / Muffet, and somewhere along the way I went from planing out something with everyone’s first holiday on the surface to... an exploration of various route endings and not at all holiday related. Whoops. This was also supposed to be a lot shorter, but here we are at 4k words instead. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as i enjoyed writing it! This was done as a part of @undertalesecretsanta . Thank you mods for all your efforts in hosting the event!

Summary: Webs are a sticky, tricky thing, really. Fortunately, spiders know how to untangle themselves from even the trickiest of webs.

( an apt way to view the branches of fate, really )

A human, they whisper, a human is coming. Get the soul and you will be rewarded.

And so, once again, Muffet finds herself with a renewed purpose. She has grown tired of fussy monsters who will not help her, of having to swindle for even a little bit to be thrown her way. She won’t need to bake for profit ever again if she succeeds. She can finally relax.

Soon. Soon she will have enough, and everything will be alright. The spider clan will be rich and able to be reunited, and they can all be happy together, and she will be happy too—

( — and this is the thought she hold onto when the frying pan slams down on her body ).

The Ruins are ( mostly ) empty. Same goes for Snowdin, and Waterfall—

She wonders if they were bored by the time they got to Hotland. Despicable, really, but seeing as they hadn’t harmed her or her spiders, she can’t completely hate them either.

No, that is a lie, Muffet absolutely detests that human. Her spiders may come first, but that does not make her heartless when it came to other monsters. But she is a woman of her word, there was no reason to kill a human that had supported her cause.

( Was it wrong of her to have done so? Perhaps. Maybe then, there would be a little more liveliness left in the Underground, flashy and loud— )

Napstablook is generous enough to assist her with arranging help with getting the spiders out of the Ruins; the fact that, despite everything, her spiders can be reunited is barely a silver lining, but she’ll take what she can get. The fact that she can afford to bring them home hardly matters, when the Underground is so sparse and the Ruins are opened up once again. It’s not even nearly as much of a hassle, as cold as Snowdin is to travel through. Traps and puzzles are deactivated, there is no need for those things anymore, so there is little but the cold to slow her down.

The spiders are back home, where they should be. Hotland is more or less the same, minus two voices— one loud and glamorous, one not so. Everything should be fine, by those standards.

But it’s not.

It is not.

The world just does not feel quite right.

ii.

Every king needs their queen— no, that is a lie. Mettaton needs no one, if she is to be honest, but she is good at her job.

Muffet dangles from her web, flaunting— a menacing flash of her flash of her fangs. Intimidate their ‘foes’ into confessing their ‘crimes’— work that she could leave to that skeleton, sure, but Sans has always been lazy. She, however, never slacks off.

( Perhaps no real wrongdoings have been done, but it’s fine discarding a few extra ingredients from the batch. Better than letting them sit and go bad— rotten ingredients were never any good. It would spoil the whole batch!

Besides, her pet, her darling Cupcake needed a treat to be rewarded with. What better than something she needed to get rid of anyways? )

It wasn’t like she did not benefit from it either. Why would she serve a fussy customer— no, let her rephrase that: Muffet found no point, no joy in serving someone who did not service her needs too. Even when that someone was the ruler of the Underground, known for whispers of sudden disappearances; she had enough pride left that she would not let herself be squished under Mettaton’s heel like some pest. Her spiders had been brought home with his generosity, and it is oh so fun to watch monsters squirm when she watches them with two, four, five eyes, and claps in joy with her hands— that is a thrill unlike anything else, one that even the capturing of a soul surely wouldn’t have brought. It is not all bad, the monsters had never done anything to serve her, why should she spare them now?

( There is a reason why monsters do not come to her parlor anymore ).

No, while the spider monster might hold a grudge for none of them to be willing to help her cause, that was then and this is now. This is a matter of business, dearie, did you not understand that? Muffet coos and is amused in her tittering, as she watches confusion spread across features.

Spiders may live with her now, but that did not mean that some did not linger in other parts of the Underground. Allow for the whispers to reach corners and make its way back to her. It was always a fun choice to make, what to do with that information. Let one of the ‘agents’ handle this? Handle it herself? Do nothing with it?

( Those who enter the parlor do not usually leave ).

Of course, she can always hand the task over to Mettaton, but she usually left that for the worst offenses only. It was much more delightful to watch and wait to see how he’d react on such occasions, if it was worth making a mess of himself for. More often than not, the answer was yes, and she would make sure the webs were keeping the prey in place, maybe paralyze them if they seemed particularly rowdy, but otherwise sat back to admire his work.

Despite it all, she does not think he’s a bad person— would that not make her a bad person too? Muffet knows that once, he was not half a bad person, despite what one might believe; she was once not an entirely bad person either, despite her arguments that she has remained unchanged all these times.

It wasn’t their fault that they were like this, was it?

“Darling,” He beckons for her, so she lowers herself from her web, dropping herself from the sticky silk with ease and onto his lap. She hardly weighs a thing to a monster made of metal, two hands settling themselves on his shoulders, two others coming up to cup his face. “Have you heard the news?”

“Dearie.” She returns, a brief kiss; her eyes blink at him. “You are the news~” Which is, technically speaking, true. MTT News was the Underground’s news source. Perhaps not like what it once was, but still news.

The robot gives her a look that seems unimpressed, but she knows he’ll let her get away with it ( almost anyone else would’ve been too scared to even consider talking back, she enjoys such privilege with glee ). “You’ve been holding out on me. There was an incident on the edges of Hotland?”

Ah, that. Well, what can she say? She knows Mettaton likes keeping away from the lab. She shrugs, fangs peeking out as she grins. “Someone simply needed a dunk in the river, ahuhu~~” A forceful dip, perhaps, but what did the details matter. If he can read between the lines and figure out what exactly that all means, it does not show; of course, he is an actor, she would not be surprised if he knows exactly and simply opts to not speak of it.

“Well—” He starts, a pause, she’s caught him off guard. Hadn’t predicted her answer. A mechanical clearing of his throat, before he speaks again. “Well, that still calls for a punishment... or perhaps a reward?”

There’s a gleam in her eyes, a grin and a giggle before she’s pulling back. “Already a step ahead of you~ I brought them back for you speak to, fufufu~”

“Ah, now you’re speaking my language, gorgeous.”

( A butterfly and a spider trapped in a web—

—who is really the victim here? )

iii.

Humans aren’t so bad, she decides. She still lacks enough to bring the spiders back home, and they were still stuck in the Underground, but they weren’t dead. It’s not all bad. They made an effort to help her, which is more than she can say for some monsters.

The shy, nerdy one passes through, sometimes, to check up on her; and she will flash her fangs at the scientist and giggle as she scampers off. Other days Muffet will leave her web, willingly, to see the spiders now that the Ruins aren’t closed off.

One time, she leaves to go through to Snowdin, try and figure out if there is a good way to bring the spiders home. Even if she’s cold, at least the Royal Guard is there to help her.

( Which roughly translates to, at least the Canine Unit was there to try and play with her. And then went to fetch Papyrus when they realized she wasn’t interested in them, who in turn fetched Undyne, because Undyne was likely to be more helpful at assisting ).

Muffet likes Undyne ( only kind of like that ) because she’s to the point. She doesn’t bother with trying to skirt around things— time is money, as the saying goes, and while Muffet is not really that greedy with her money, she’d much rather not freeze to death out in Snowdin. Unfortunately, the former captain has very little advice to offer, since the main issue is the fact that the forest is big and the spiders would probably die before they even reached town. The cold is not a foe that can be fought, unfortunately; she laughs a little when the warrior offers to beat up the cold nonetheless. On a more serious note, Undyne also offers to check in with Alphys for her opinion, which is favor she wouldn’t have been willing to ask for on her own, so she’s somewhat thankful for that.

She hasn’t visited with Napstablook in a while, so she does that— she nabbed some ghost pastries in advance for this particular occasion. Just because she only sold spider goods didn’t mean she was incapable of baking other things! For a very select audience, perhaps, but she liked to think of it less as business and more like the kind of favor one did for their friend. They were supportive of her cause and if she baked a few goods for them every now and then in return, what of it? They needed something good, they were always so blue— not that she can blame them for that, but that’s besides the point.

She realizes a little too late that her sudden visit has intruded on something— well, probably something, she’s not entirely sure if they are lying on the floor in accordance to ‘tradition’, or for some other reason. Muffet spares a brief glance to their other visitor, a figure she can recognize quite well, but opts to ignore for the time being.

“oh... i wasn’t... expecting to see you... muffet...” They greet her; the sort of dejected manner they hold themselves with has always made her frown ( she’s glad to see she’s not the only one, if the motion in her peripherals is to be any indication ).

“Why not? You’re my best customer~” Teasing, she’s only teasing as the basket is offered to them. “I had some... business to attend to in Snowdin~ I thought I would come by to keep you company afterwards.”

“oh, right... the spiders are still in the ruins... aren’t they? i’m sorry... i’d help if i could... but the snail business is... still pretty bad.”

Muffet tuts at him, as if she’d blame him. They were both suffering from not being to make money off their fellow monsters, Napstablook was just better natured about it. She was not, though. “Ah, speaking of that, dearie~ I’ve got quite the story about that!” She ignores the metallic sound of their third party getting up, ignores what she assumes to be a glare. “You remember the human who came through, yes? Quite a darling~~ Even helped donate to our bake sale a little~ Not that I knew that when I was fighting them. And—”

“Darling.” Mettaton drawls, and she knows she’s annoyed him. Good! She almost killed an innocent human on his behalf! He’s cunning, Muffet will give him that, but she does not enjoy being deceived like that. He should be at least half as annoyed as she is. “Your gossip is going to put me to sleep. Please change the topic before you bore me any more than you already have.”

“i... don’t really mind...” Napstablook chimes in, though they seem to go ignored.

“You’re no fun. Fine~” She pouts, four arms crossed; she’ll drop the topic for now. Besides, she doesn’t really need to give Napstablook something else to be sad about. “Would you like to hear about the gossip in Snowdin instead then?”

Later, when she leaves Blook Acres, she knows she is not alone, because she can hear the plodding of heeled boots, so she stops and waits for him to catch up— it doesn’t really make much of a difference since they both need to take Hotland’s elevator to get back to their respective homes, but there was no need for her to make him chase after her ( well, maybe it’d be fun to have someone chase after her, but she digresses. It’s a time waster right now ).

“I feel as though I might... owe you an apology.” He starts, and Muffet wants to snort a little— an apology would be far from compensation, but it might be a step in the right direction. If she’s feeling generous. “I was not aware that things were so dire for you. Allow me to make up for it.”

She’s still upset that Mettaton so easily played her for a fool— holding a grudge, however, feels foolish for now ( or maybe she’s being fooled again, only the angel knows ). “And what do you get out of it?”

“Well, I’d never! But, you know, if you’re offering— the spiders being saved from the Ruins would be quite a broadcast worthy moment.”

She groans because, of course, she should have expected there’d be a catch, and of course, it’s a ridiculous catch ( really, she was expecting something entirely different )— only fitting for someone with as much grandeur as him. It’s such a small price for her, though, so she will begrudgingly agree.

It’s better. Things are not the best— this is far from their best ending.

But it’s better, she can’t ask for much else.

iv.

People come. People leave. That is the way this world works, she knows. People come and go, and she has no intentions of trying to make them stay. Such is futile.

Muffet laughs and giggles at monsters who pass through her domain, at the ones that try and convince her to leave her home. What an opportune moment, is what she thinks, and so she stays, like always.

Silly scientists.

( While she regrets not tying Alphys up and playing with her a bit, she’s never seen the lizard so determined— frantic and anxious, yes, that is a given as far as she can tell, but determined is not. So she lets her go on her way, knows that something is coming her way and prepares ).

She is no hero— Muffet would laugh in your face at even the mere suggestion of such— she is no hero, she is not trying to defeat that thing for the sake of others.

No, such a greedy human deserves no pity, no break. One who may have supported her cause all the same, but that is besides the point. A being who has killed so many must have quiet some money— sure, it’s a shame she must go about funding her cause this way, but she thinks the monsters would have preferred it go to her than their killer. Surely, this time, she can succeed in bringing the spiders home. She can be happy knowing that, for a fact.

So she cackles when the thing finally decides to show up, pass through her nest— a foolish move, she thinks. Why would you go through her home? No one is more familiar with the webbed area like she is, it is so easy to catch the tiny little thing like the pest it is. It hardly even seems human when it stares her down like that, face devoid of any emotion. Unfeeling, unlike any monster. Muffet grins and bares her fangs at it and—

She is cocky, has hardly had the time to utter even a sentence; doesn’t notice the weapon until it has collided with her painfully.

This isn’t right.

Her spiders scuttle around her feet, whispers of go home, go home, go home.

Muffet does not bake, she does not tease to munch on people— in this small town, too idle for anyone’s wellbeing, she does not do anything. A monster like her has no place here.

She might as well be a ghost.

( Go home, go home, go back underground.

If only things were that easy ).

Something happens out there, she knows— an echo of laughter falls from her lips.

She does not go out.

( Go back, go back.

She waits until they can go back ).

vi.

It is probably a good thing that their leader is a lively one, or else she thinks that monster’s spirits would’ve been much lower than they currently were. It was not as simple as turning on the television to watch Mettaton’s shows to make them smile anymore. A shame, truly, because while Muffet did not care for those kind of flashy things, had no care for stars of that caliber, she can recognize something has been lost from the Underground.

( A shame, but it really makes no difference to her in the end. Her spiders have been spared, so that’s all that matters to her. The safety of her spiders.

It’s easier to act like that’s all that matters, that things are better for her that way, at least ).

Their new ruler is much more brutal. Blunt. Blood-thirsty— and sure, Undyne’s always been kind of like that, probably. It was an admirable trait, for the head of the Royal Guard; it is a good trait for a ruler too, when supported by the people that she rules over.

Muffet tuts at her and wonders if she will grow to regret that, however, when her grief finally fades. She can mourn those who were lost, but she cannot do so forever. People will move past their grief, eventually... or die when their hope finally gives out.

( She leaves Hotland, passes the lab with its broken doors, forced open when it’d been quiet for too long. It is a sorry echo of what it had once been there. Of who had once been there.

It doesn’t matter, she reaffirms ).

One of her spiders accompanies her, riding on her shoulder; the others stay safe at home with her dear pet. She grabs onto her dress with two of her arms, lifts it up as she wades through the waters of Waterfall. She does not really care for the wet, rocky terrain of Waterfall, but she can afford to make sacrifices. It’s not like any of them have better things to be doing.

( Despite what one may think, she is not entirely all selfish. That said, she is not selfless either, she has her reasons for doing what she does. Her own trivial sort of gain ).

She leaves ghost pastries with Napstablook and checks up on the snails ( she does not care for that wet, slimy thing, but they are friends of the spiders, kind of, and they are tasty, so it’s only with brief prodding before she goes on her way ). Napstablook tells her what she needs to know in exchange for the treats, though she knows they would have told her regardless, just as she would’ve given them to them regardless.

She’s not at her former home, but the piano echoes in the corridors long before she is even close to reaching her. An echoing reminder of how much more empty Waterfall ( the Underground in general, really ) is these days, there is no Shyren to sing along with the occasional plink of an off key note. Once, Muffet would have come to Waterfall to see Napstablook and would have expected to hear the warrior training. Loud clanging of pots and voices yelling while they cooked. The piano playing might have been loud and passionate, fierce and angry at a situation like this, but it is much more dull and sullen now, an almost fragile sound. She finds the Empress draped over the piano, quietly— in a world of her own, probably. She wonders if she has cried today too.

( Once, Muffet thinks she might have not minded the Underground being so empty. She is not sure how to feel anymore ).

Two arms reach up to smooth her hair back into being ‘presentable’— she is pretty sure Undyne has never cared for her appearance, but a leader should look the part— two others gently pull her back in a gesture that could be considered a hug. “Your people await you, dearie~” There is a hum of acknowledgment and little more, but that is fine. She’s not here to fix what cannot be mended.

( Once, Muffet feels like this could have been love ).

vii.

Surface spiders are so very interesting, Muffet decides. When the human— Frisk— mentions to her that the surface has quite a variety of spiders, she did not think they meant it as sincerely as they did. They are so similar to the ones at her home, yet vastly different all the same. She wonders at what point spider monsters and human spider-animal-things changed, but that sounds like a biology thing that Alphys could probably answer in a way that would make no sense to her. So she will just wonder and appreciate the similarities between them— they can communicate with each other, so there’s that. Do the differences even matter, knowing that?

The surface world in general, is very interesting. Muffet does not technically need to bake anymore since the spiders are free, but she does need to make a ‘living’ of sorts, and baking is the easiest way of doing that. Humans may be skeptical of food with spiders in it, but her fellow monsters are finally coming around to her pastries, so all is well.

Well, sort of.

As good for business as all the attention is, it brings about some... unwanted guests. That is probably a generous way of describing the current pest.

“Cameras aren’t allowed back here, dearie~ No exceptions. Leave~~” She’s very to the point about it, easily weaving around Mettaton’s boxy build to get to the oven so she can check on what she’s baking— she needs no pests hanging about, nor does she need any additional distractions. There’s a pause where she thinks he’s actually going to put up a fight, but seems to think better of it and dismisses the camera crew with a wave of his hand. Not the outcome she’d expected, but better. Workable.

“I’m not stopping to talk to you, so speak up~” Muffet might have spiders to help her, but there is only so much they can do, which means she doesn’t have the time for a break. It’s probably good that she has the extra arms to pitch in.

“A brand deal would only benefit the both of us, you know. I’ll provide you with some proper advertising. If we combined our efforts, we’d be actual competition against Grillby’s.”

“Grillby’s doesn’t sell sweets~~ Humans, on the other hand... Still, I’m doing fine here. I don’t need your silly brand~” She bares her teeth in a way that she wants to be menacing ( unfortunately, Mettaton is not a tiny and naïve human, so he doesn’t even flinch— he laughs, the audacity! ); he looks put out, though, so she supposes that’s a victory.

Also unfortunately, Mettaton is stubborn, so even though she gets rid of him for the day, he returns no less than three times that week. Never alone, either, so as much as she would like to rid of him, it’s not so easy to do so. Business propositions are put aside for casual conversations, but she doesn’t trust him so easily ( she’s been deceived by him once before, no need to go doing that again ).

She feels uneasy, like— like she’s missing something. Like something should have happened. But nothing happens, and she’s not sure if that’s a good thing or not. They monsters more than deserve some peace after everything, so she’ll take the peace as a sign of good things to come.

( Even if it cannot last ).

#undertale #undertale secret santa 2018 #undertale secret santa #muffet #muffeton #muffet x undyne #i'd tag this better but.....#it's kinda just little hints here and there #* zhi writes #* mine

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underimagines · 6 years

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take me out (and we’ll karaoke)

3k One-Shot: Underswap!Mettaton/Reader for Audrey

Summary: You and Happstablook go out for karaoke.

read it on ao3 | tip-jar | commission me

God this place was nice.

“I know~!” Happstablook trilled, giggling at the awestruck look on your face. “Isn’t it just the most darling little café? I was doing some research on where a good place would be to take you—and a friend of mine happened to mention that this place had recently opened up a week or so ago.”

They twirled beneath the fairy lights strung up across the ceiling. “And I remembered how much you loved karaoke!”

“Ohmygod!” You lifted your balled-up fists. “Is this place a karaoke bar??”

You’d never have guessed it yourself.

The exterior of the place looked modern enough, but the inside was what caught you off-guard. It was a smooth mixture of boho and indie aesthetics. Fairy lights and potted plants hung from various points on the ceiling and walls. The smell of spices and potpourri wafted through the air.

With the small number of chairs, decorative lamps, and tables scattered around the lobby, it helped the place feel well-lived in, but not too cluttered. The lights gave it a touch of enchantment.

It was really freaking nice, was what you were saying. Nicer than anywhere you’d been in a while.

“I really hope you didn’t, like, break your wallet getting us a reservation here.” You couldn’t help but mumble, nibbling on your fingertips anxiously. “If you did, I’m going to drop dead, right here and now.”

Happstablook just rolled their big, half-lidded eyes and slid their tiny hand-nub into yours, tugging you along. “Come on, darling! If you think this is nice, just wait till you see what I got for us~.”

They practically sang the last part. It made your chest tighten and stomach flutter.

The woman at the front desk was dressed casually immaculate, with a nametag that read ‘Emma.’ A pair of thick-rimmed glasses were perched on her nose, framed by a constellation of freckles across her pale skin. She flashed you a smile of big, perfect teeth, and you immediately felt a little uncomfortable.

“Hi! Welcome to Rewind, how can I help you?”

Rewind, that was the name! You’d had trouble trying to figure out exactly what the sign outside had read—it’d been spelled “RE<<IND.”

Well, now you had confirmation that this place wasn’t just trying to be indie—it was indie.

“Hi, there, darling!” Happsta cooed back, floating up to meet her gaze across the mahogany desk. “We have a reservation—should be under ‘Blook and Company.’”

Emma nodded understandingly and moved to flip open the big black folder that sat off to her side. After scanning through it a bit, she tapped a finger somewhere in the list and gave you both another giant grin. “Found ya! Room 38-C, your allotted time slot is three hours in total and we’ll be delivering your requested meal around 6 pm. And since it’s 4 pm now…”

She glanced at her watch. “You’ll have your room until 7! Dinner is served in the main lobby area.”

“Perfect.” Happsta chirped, turning to meet your somewhat confused gaze. They gave you a little wiggle of excitement. “Thank you!”

“No problem!” Emma responded in just as friendly a tone. Just as you turned to walk away, she called out again. “Oh, wait, your key!”

“Oh!” Happstablook blew a raspberry at the air, rolling their eyes again. “Of course, we wouldn’t want to get ourselves locked in! Thank you darling.”

They took the key and turned to hold it up for you to see. It was just your average little, silver key. But the way Happsta was holding it up was like it was the key to the entire city.

“Now that we’ve got that out of the way, we should get going. This date won’t go on itself!”

Their excitement was contagious. You couldn’t help but smile as you followed them through the common room, to the elevator. “Why did they give you a key?”

“The rooms lock automatically from the inside,” They explained, pressing the button for your floor. “It’s for security reasons—only someone with the key would be able to get in from the outside.”

“Oh.” You nodded. The elevator music wafted between you, filling the small gap of silence, before you spoke again. “Did she say they were going to deliver dinner to us?”

They made a noise of affirmation. “I told you it was going to be a special place! Oh, darling, I know you’ll just love it!”

“Damn and I thought it was fancy before.” A nervous laugh bubbled in the back of your throat. “Be serious with me, how much is all this gonna cost?”

“I’m not telling!” They teased. “If I did, you’d just make a big deal out of it.”

“Of course, I would.” You agreed without hesitation. “This is the fanciest place I’ve been to in months. I’m serious! And you went out of your way to set up all of this, just for me!”

They tilted their head back in forth in a so-so manner. “Well you’re half right, darling. What sort of gentle-ghost would I be if I didn’t treat my beautiful girlfriend to the very best that life has to offer? …Buuut. I didn’t do it just for you.”

You glanced at them in confusion, but they turned away, biting their lip and wiggling with joy as the elevator continued its descent. “Are you really doing this for dramatic effect?”

“Shh!” Finally, the elevator stopped with a ding. “Like I said, I didn’t do it just for you…”

You rolled your eyes and smiled, playing into their little game.

As the doors opened to reveal the long, plush carpeted hallway, they turned to you and smiled mischievously. “I did it for the both of us.”

“Yeah, yeah, you showboat.” They stuck out their tongue, a gesture which you returned playfully. “Shouldn’t you be sweeping me off my feet by now?”

“Oh, I’ll be a doing a lot more than that,” Happsta chirped, taking your hand again. “Follow me!”

Just looking at the lavish room made you feel like you were losing money by the second.

“Isn’t this precious?” Happsta crooned, twirling into the center of the room. Peach walls framed the redwood floor. Several bright red armchairs were scattered around in a semi-circle, punctuated by a round table in the middle that looked like it was the same mahogany as the front desk. A bowl of potted flowers hung over the top of it from a hook on the ceiling.

You walked in, practically on your toes, scared to settle in. There were candles lining the high shelves. The scent of lavender filled your nose, chasing away your anxiety with each deep breath you took. “It’s gorgeous. Are those autographed photos?”

Sure enough, a line of black twine was strung across one end of the room, decorated with pictures held up with clothing pins.

A familiar face caught your eye as you stepped up to inspect them. “Is that Napstaton?”

There was no mistaking it. You’d recognize that grinning face anywhere.

He had his arm slung around a man who looked to be in his 40s or so. With one hand, he angled the camera down at them both. With the other, he shot a peace sign.

“Ey yo Tony where’s that fresh pepperoni! Thanks for the VIP tour, dawg, this is gonna be the hottest new hangout on the block before you know it!! – Sincerely, Napstaton”

Happstablook read it aloud over your shoulder, mimicking their cousin’s Californian accent.

“I can’t believe he actually wrote that,” They hummed, shaking their head.

“I can.” There was something utterly ridiculous about what he’d written and how he’d signed off. “He’s such a goof.”

“Yes, but he’s a goof with good taste.” Happsta met your gaze and glanced away. “Sometimes.”

“I should have known.” You smiled, putting the photo back in place. “When you mention pulling strings, it always leads back to Napstaton.”

They looked insulted. “Well, it wasn’t all him, you know! Undyne had some say in it, too.”

“I can only imagine what Undyne had to say.” You scanned the rest of the photos. Most of them were of big name local celebrities, or small-time international ones. There was one of Papyrus mixed in, and you were almost certainly sure that he’d snuck it in himself.

“She made some good points.” Happsta huffed, tiny cheeks puffing out. They always looked so cute when they got sour. “Besides, darling, I don’t see you complaining!”

You shrugged lightly and turned back to face them. “I’m not, this place is great. It always surprises me how much influence Napstaton has over such a broad empire of…stuff.”

“Mm, you’re right!” They sighed, nodding with a semi-defeated look. “The boy is as flashy as he is talented, I’ll give him that. But, changing the topic! I didn’t get us this karaoke room just so we could gawk at pictures of my cousin, you know~.”

Happsta wiggle-floated all the way over the flat-screen that hung on the wall. They grabbed two of the four microphones and handed you one, reaching for the remote. A list of various songs popped up, and they hummed thoughtfully as they scrolled through them.

“Anything in particular catch your eye?” They spoke in a half-aware tone.

“Not really, I’m good with anything!” You paused. “Except country.”

Your partner laughed. “I happen to think I’d look quite dashing in a ten gallon!”

You snickered, leaning into one of the chairs. “Don’t go giving Napstaton any more cowboy-related ideas! God, remember that time he tried to go bronc riding at that monster truck thing?”

They shivered. “Oh, darling, please don’t remind me. It took forever for Doctor Undyne to reattach his arm.”

“Does he still have the boots?”

“Yes.”

“Does he still wear the boots?”

“…Yes.”

You shook your head. Poor Undyne. The mental image it gave you was enough to make you want to curl into a tiny ball and disappear. “Oof. But anyway, yeah, I’m not a great singer so it’s not like the genre will do much to change that.”

“Must you insult yourself, daring?” Happsta glanced at you disapprovingly. “I, for one, think you have a lovely singing voice.”

“We’re dating, you’re supposed to say that.”

“Be that as it may, I’m telling the truth!” They looked a little annoyed.

“I know that, Happsta. If there’s one thing you are, it’s honest with your opinions.”

That perked them up a little. “Why, thank you, darling~!”

“That does not change the fact that I think I have a singing voice that could make dogs howl.”

“Oh!” Their cheeks puffed up again, pink ectoplasm flushing red over the extended skin. Happsta narrowed their eyes at you, before their lips quirked up in a playful smile. “Prove it.”

You blinked. “What?”

“If you really think you’re no good,” Your boo turned slowly to face the television, lifting the microphone to their lips. They glanced at you from the corner of their eye. “Then you’ve gotta prove it to me.”

“…Are you trying to use reverse-psychology on me?”

“Is it working?”

Your serious expression finally cracked, and you let the smile you’d been holding back slip out. “Yes.”

“Then yes!” They nudged the other microphone in your direction, beaming. “Come on darling, I didn’t get this room just to sing all by myself, though I did get it to sing.”

Rolling your eyes, you snatched the microphone off the table and moved to stand beside them. “Alright, you little poltergeist, let’s do this.”

With a bounce and wiggle, Happsta clicked on a playlist that read “BLOOK RESERV.”

“Did you get them to set up a playlist for us?”

“Shh!” They reached out, pressing a nub hand against your lips. “Shhh.”

You tried to speak again, but they placed their hand back over your mouth. “Shhh.”

Open. Pat. “Shh-shhh-shh.”

Open. Pat. “Shhhhhh.”

They pulled away when you shot them a Look. “Just trust me!”

“Fine.” You smiled. “But this had better be good!”

You were absolutely eating all of your words, with extra hot Shame Sauce.

Happstablook looked more than pleased with the reaction they were getting from you, which was a mixture of giddiness, playful dramatics, and a smile so wide that it hurt your cheeks.

They’d picked all of your favorite songs.

The entire playlist looked like it’d been copied and pasted from the music library of your phone—knowing Happsta, it might have been.

Though you’d started off quiet and awkward, by the end of the first song you were twirling and dancing and waving your hands around like Napstaton did on stage.

Happstablook let loose too, flipping their little tuft of ecto-hair and wiggling their hips like they were in a dance competition with a Moldsmal.

“And I,” You crooned, leaning towards them dramatically. They echoed your pose, until the sides of your heads were touching, and your voices layered over one another harmoniously. “Had! The time of my li-i-ife, and I owe it all to you…!”

On cue with the beat, you both pulled out your best disco moves. You dragged a finger from your hip to pointing above your head, while Happsta did the best version of a hustle that they could manage. Neither of you were on rhythm with the song itself, but you didn’t really care. You just smiled and laughed and made silly faces.

They were right, you were having a great time.

And then, right in the middle of your rendition of a funky chicken, someone knocked on the door.

Very much like the chicken you were mimicking, you made a loud, ridiculous squawking sound and tumbled back. Happsta caught you just before you had the chance to slam into the circular table.

“Oof, careful darling! If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you had two left feet—but what would I know? I have no feet!”

They chuckled brightly, and the person knocked again.

“Oh, right.” Happsta cleared their throat dramatically. “Yes?”

“It’s Emma!”

You scrambled to open the door. Sure enough, Emma stood in the hallway, beaming and wiggling her perfectly painted nails in an excited wave. “Heya! I’m just here to remind you that dinner is in 5 in the common room, and you should leave your keys at the front desk. You can come get them again after you’ve finished eating.”

It was said in a robotic, rehearsed way. Though her smile said, “customer service” her eyes screamed “when is my shift over.”

Between the pity you felt and the shock of her falsely positive tone, all you could manage was a silent nod.

“Thank you, darling!” Happsta swayed up to take their place next to you, offering Emma a genuine smile. That drew the sunshine back to her face, and her eyes softened considerably. “We’ll give you a visit soon.”

She nodded briefly and turned, calling over her shoulder. “Alright, see you guys then!”

As the door clicked closed, you sighed in relief. “Man, she looked beat.”

“I imagine she is.” Happstablook made a sound of affirmation. “While these sorts of establishments are lush on the outside, it’s usually the employees who suffer the most at the end of the day.”

“Oh…”

They turned, shock swallowing the sadness that had flashed in their eyes. “Oh, I’m sorry, darling! I didn’t mean to say something so depressing. I’m certain she loves her job—it must just be a lot to handle.”

“No, I know what you mean.” You offered him a tense smile. “That just reminds me of how hard reception work is. I had a job like that once and you’re right, it was exhausting.”

“Mm.” They briefly glanced towards the carpet, before turning to offer you a much more relaxed grin. “But let’s not spoil the night with stuff like that. We’ve still got dinner to look forward to, and then another hour of fun before we can turn in for the evening!”

You nodded back, pushing the flashbacks of desk work from the forefront of your mind. “Yeah, you’re right.”

As if on cue, your stomach growled. “Speaking of dinner…”

Happsta giggled. “I suppose we should head that way.”

After you put everything back in place and stepped into the hallway, Happsta furrowed their brows. “Here, let me turn in the key.”

“Are you sure?” It was a bit of a surprise, but nothing that seemed exceptionally worrisome.

“Yes, I have a question that I’d like to ask the young lady at the front desk, anyway.” They gave you a smile and a wink, wiggling the key in one hand. “I’ll be right back, darling, so you just wait for me here, okay?”

“Uh…okay, sure.” Without much else to do, you did.

And true to their word, it only took them a few minutes to return back to your side.

“What was that about?”

“Hm?” Their smile was positively impish. “Oh, it’s nothing big. Let’s just say that our lovely receptionist friend will be finding a hefty tip on her desk.”

Warmth bloomed in your chest like a flower. “Happsta, that’s so sweet!”

They blushed, swishing from side to side. “It’s nothing. I just figured that, well, since you had a point. And she’s had such excellent customer service, that it wouldn’t hurt, especially since we had such a lovely evening.”

“Well,” You gave them a big, happy smile. “It’s not over yet! We’ve still got dinner to look forward to.”

“And more singing!”

You giggled. “And singing. How many songs did you put in that playlist anyway?”

Their lips turned up in a way that you could only compare to a cat emoji. “You’ll just have to find out.”

Leaning against the wall, you took a moment to stretch. “Thanks again, Happsta. I’ve had a really good time tonight.”

They grinned, “Who knows, maybe this could be ‘our place’ someday?”

You rolled your eyes again as they slipped their tiny hand into yours but smiled anyway.

‘Our place.’ You liked the sound of that.

Another Underswap commission for another lovely returning customer! Thank you to Audrey, for being such a darling and giving me another chance to write for you; it's always a pleasure~! (PS: The song I’m referencing in the title is “Karaoke” by Smallpools, you should check it out!)

- Mod Mellow

#commission #underswap #mettaton #happstablook #x reader #mettaton x reader #fanfic #fic #mod's fanfics #mod mellow #long post #fluff #cute #thank you again darling!#queued post

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platinumperformer · 6 years

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eh don't sweat it Mettaton cause let me tell ya i've seen and built lots of robots and none of them could ever be as good as you he probably is just intimidated by your swag.

“Oh trust me sweetie, I wasn’t worried. I know my confidence can be rather threatening. But don’t sell other robots so short, I’m sure they have their own special talents. Each one of us is important in our way. and Not to mention typically drop dead gorgeous.”

#[Heartbeat on a hard drive (Metta)]#In which he barely manages to get across the ice rink this ask provided without a crack #Anonymous

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wrexie · 7 years

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It's been a while. So, I was going through some of your art for TST, and I came upon a certain image of MTT as a human and he was drop dead gorgeous.

Hahaha, ohh, that mettaton was greatI've gotta try it again sometime, after I practice painting skin some more. Esp. Darker skin. It was super saturated, iirc

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kin-and-kaboodle · 6 months

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For your mettaton kin From a frisk.. How do you EAT?? LIKE IS IT OIL? IS IT- WHAT DO YOU EAT?? (/pos/curious)

Hi, Frisk! Late to this, aren’t I? I wasn’t fully corporeal, not fully integrated into my body, so I was still essentially just a ghost possessing a machine. Enough that it would hurt me if I was attacked, but just not enough that I could be knocked out of my robot body through a hard enough hit. Because of that, my ghost body took care of all the food. Basically absorbed it, no waste left behind. The equivalent of it just dissolving, all of it, not a trace left. Monster magic, and all that. As for what I ate. Anything I liked! It was not uncommon for me to get food at my own resort. Oh and of course, Alphys’s snacks, and Blooky’s and my own cooking. I did charge on electricity, though!

#Drop Dead Gorgeous (Mettaton)#kin #confession booth #Recollections

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kin-and-kaboodle · 11 months

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Tag guide

List is not complete, more will be added when relevant.

Please remove my personal kin tags when you reblog my posts.

General tags:

#Confession Booth | Asks

#Recollections | Kintype Memories

#Divine Comedy | Funny posts

#Preaching | Original textposts

Kintype tags:

#Nothing Is Certain Except (Fate) | Death & Taxes

#Press Start To Begin (Polybius) | Independent source. Living arcade cabinet (not the Cabinet Man, but similar)

#Memento Mori (Grim Reaper)

#Daisy Bell (HAL 9000) | 2001:ASO

#Always Watches (Slenderman) | Not Marble Hornets canon

#Octorazzi (Korosensei) | Assassination Classroom/Ansatsu Kyoushitsu

#Cogito Ergo Sum (AM) | IHNMAIMS

#Pumpkin King (Jack Skellington) | The Nightmare Before Christmas

#Nightlight Daydream (Daycare Attendant) | FNAF:SB

#Justice & Splendor (Archangel Gabriel) | Ultrakill

#Drop Dead Gorgeous (Mettaton) | Undertale

#Showtime On The Hour (Funtime Foxy) | FNAF:SL

#Hopping Mad (Alexander) | Café Venus Flytrap

#Gold Rush Glutton (No Face) | Spirited Away

#Swan Lake (Odile) | Swan Therian tag, not actually related to Swan Lake. Odile is the name I use for my swan theriotype.

#Terrible Fate (Happy Mask Salesman) | LoZ:MM/OoT

#Final Ferryman (Charon)

#Pawmegranate (Gloomy Bear)

#Crybaby (SCP-096) | SCP Foundation

#Laugh Is Fun (SCP-2030-1) | SCP Foundation

#Channel Surfer (Tele-Vision) | Independent source

#Batter Up (The Batter) | OFF

#Until It Is Done (Doom Slayer) | DOOM

#Severed Skull (Dullahan)

#Un Un Un (Regigigas) | Pokémon

#Taser Happy (AUTO) | WALL-E

#Calm Before The Storm (Dragonkin)

#Carbon-14 (Deinonychus) | Carbon is the name I use for my deinonychus paleotheriotype

#WWW (The Internet)

#I Don’t Bite (Vampire)

#Smear Frames (Bendy) | BatIM

#Buy Gold (Bill Cipher) | Gravity Falls

#Cat Dead Details Later (Herbert West) |Reanimator

#Not All There Myself (Cheshire Cat)

#Fearful Symmetry (Golden Tiger)

#Red Light (Calamari) | Squid Game square mask soldier

#Eternal Silence (Music Man) | FNAF:FFPS/UCN

#Sweet Tooth (Candy Cadet) | FNAF:FFPS/SB: Ruin

#Distracted (Henry Stickmin) | The Henry Stickmin Collection

#Second In Command (RHM) | The Henry Stickmin Collection

#Rose Tinted Glasses (Swatch) | Deltarune

#??? (Oddball) | Independent source

#Ad-Blocker (The Chosen One) | Animator VS Animation

#The Manager (Peddler) | We Happy Restaurant

#Yet Darker (Gaster) | Undertale

#Best Friend (Kinito) | KinitoPET

#Even Death May Die (Cthulhu) | H.P. Lovecraft

# Think Fast (Dr. Reflex) | Baldi’s Basics

# Smile. Always. (The Smiler) | Alton Towers

#Ignore this #tag guide #long post

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underimagines · 7 years

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may i have pining headcanons for the main four + mettaton and asgore?

*cracks knuckles dramatically* - M.M.

Sans:

- He hopes you don’t notice the way his eyes never leave you. He just can’t help it, he’s always watching you, like he’s afraid to turn away for even a second to realize you’ve vanished into thin air. Out of his life, possibly forever.

- The moment he kind of catches what jokes get even so much as a giggle out of you, get ready to hear a hundred more. Of course none of them are very good jokes, but as long as he’s got so much as a chance to hear your laugh again, he’ll go through as many rotten eggs as can be to find that one good apple.

- It takes a lot in him not to just...constantly stay by your side. Sure, he keeps an eye on you from afar, popping up here & there with his cart while making his “daily rounds” but sometimes it doesn’t feel like enough. He just wants to stay with you for longer than eternity would allow him--or at least, the RESETs would.

Papyrus:

- Constant dates. But they’re definitely not dates. They’re 100% platonic hang-out sessions where you two just so happen to stumble across a romantic comedy or two. Usually where the two main leads are also best friends who end up as date-mates through a series of comedic hi-jinks!! Wow, maybe it’s a sign...

- He’s always holding your hand (sometimes until you have to ask him to let go, he’ll honestly just keep holding it all day if you don’t tell him to). Brushing up against you while he gives you cooking lessons, even going so far as to snag sips from your drinks or bites from your food. Oh no!! An indirect kiss!! What a definitely unfortunate & in no way on-purpose happenstance!!!

- He practices confessing to you in the mirror for hours. It’s like a montage of him clipping through his favorite outfits--of course they’re all his favorites--& trying to express himself as best he can. But!! All of his speeches!! Are fantastic!!! How could he possibly limit himself to just one, oh you wouldn't be able to take it, you’d crave more the moment he started to talk!!! Too bad, back to the drawing board, then.

Undyne:

- Love letters. She writes so many love letters to you & she doesn’t send not-a-one. Because!! How can a letter contain what she feels for you?! God that sounds sappy but it’s true!! She just really really...really really really really really really really likes you.

- When you two hang out, she’s always finding a way to get as close to you as possible. Pretending to noogie you, throwing you onto her back to carry you somewhere, grabbing your hand to show you something cool. She treasures those moments for as long as she can, & keeps feeling your warmth under her scales for the rest of the day afterwards.

- She’s always complimenting you. How pretty you are, how hot you are, how drop-dead gorgeous you are. She’s always hinting about how lucky someone would be to have her, & the things she’d do to be that lucky person. Just!! Hurry up & notice how she feels. Before she goes crazy.

Alphys:

- She also rehearses her confessions, but they always go smoother in her head. She tries several times to just do it outright, but before she can even get the words out she’s making an excuse to change the subject, or refusing to broach it at all. Just a little more practice, & she’ll get there eventually, she’s sure!! Next time, for sure!!

- Her version of “subtle” hints are used int he form of emojis/emoticons. Mostly through winky faces. Or cute cat-like faces. & hearts, but she uses those sparingly, & always gets super flustered & tries to back-track on her statement the moments following her actually sending a heart.

Mettaton:

- He goes about it just as dramatically as you’d expect. While he’s around you he’s as cool as ever, but the moment he’s behind doors he’s moping around like you’ve just rejected him without ever saying a word. Every. Single. Time. You hang out together.

- He’s a bit like Undyne in that he’ll make excuses to get close to you, but the man has no sense of a personal bubble. When I say close to you, I mean up in your face, maybe an inch away from actually kissing you. He’ll always say he’s just teasing, then laugh (way too loudly, & for way too long) to try to drown out the vicious humming of his cooling fans.

Asgore:

- He tries so hard to be approachable. He’ll force himself into holding you close, constantly try to use (terrible) pick-up lines on you, & overall just make things incredibly awkward for the sake of being someone he thinks you’d be interested in. The fact that it never lands just makes him more discouraged.

- Those genuine moments you have growing close just make him crave your company even more. He’ll be up late into the night, trying to figure out just how to show you how much he appreciates your companionship, & how desperate he is to take that a step further.

- Sometimes when he’s feeling especially bold as you part ways he’ll kiss your hand, like you’re the most precious thing he’s ever had the pleasure of holding, & wish you a good day. Then he’ll sulk in his room, feeling terrible for having done such a thing without even asking your permission first.

#ask #undertale #sans #papyrus #undyne #alphys #mettaton #mettaton ex #asgore dreemurr #headcanons #romantic #long post #mod mellow #chokes a little on my own vomit #queued post #Anonymous

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